BCN WEEK issue 15 by Marcus Villaca Design

INSIDEguess who’s cracking?///hamaca man///Purgencies

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‘EL PRAT’ PA G E 7

B A R C E L O N A ’ S F R E E C U L T U R A L N E W S W E E K LY | W W W . B C N W E E K . C O M | S E P T 1 5 - 2 1 , 2 0 0 6

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END OF AN ERA

‘CLOS’ED FOR. BIZ ED

ALFREDO LAHOZ

A MOMENT OF SILENCE,PLEASE

VOL 1, NO 15

THE LIFECYCLE ISSUE

IS BCNOVER?

IS BARCELONA PAST HER PRIME? WALLPAPER SEEMS TO THINK SO. WE CHRONICLE THE RISE AND FALL OF ‘COOL’ BARCELONA. PA G E 4

PA G E 3

VOL 1, NO 15

Week

FA N M A I L

BCN

SEPT 15-21, 2006 W W W. B C N W E E K . C O M

E D IT O R’ S L E T T E R Monday was my third Diada Nacional de Catalunya. In case you are unfamiliar with this holiday, it is much more than an excuse to have another día festiu after returning from four weeks of vacation only one week prior. It is the day that Catalunya commemorates September 11, 1714, when she was defeated by the Bourbon Monarchy, thus ending the War of the Spanish Succession. (Didn’t you know I was a huge history dork? Oh, now you know.) In 1980, the Generalitat got themselves together and decided to make it the official Catalan national holiday, and so that is what went on on Monday in case you weren’t sure why the city’s population was draped in flags. I was living in London when Princess Diana died. Not that we can really make a comparison between the death of Di and the abolishment of the rights of the territories of the Crown of Aragon, but I get a similar feeling. I didn’t feel right going to Kensington Palace and putting down flowers while watching people weep. Similarly, I am not Catalan (which you may have gathered by this point). My first year here I went and took tons of photos in the Fossar de les Moreres, but this year I laid low. This week we ask the question: Has Barcelona given all it’s got? Is her heyday over? What the hell makes a place “cool” anyway? We also are sad to say that Hillary Leben, who has been following guiris around to see which ones leave first in her column “Who Cracks First,” is in fact cracking herself. Check out why on page 6.

Jennifer Cross J E N N @ B C N W E E K .CO M

AdÉu, Sr.Clos

BCN loses her dictator…err…mayor After saying just in March that he was quite happy with his job as the Mayor of Barcelona and wouldn’t change for anything, Clos has already packed his bags and scuttled off to Madrid as Minister of Industry. While whispers of political sideline arrangements to move a very visible problem to a more discreet hole in government are rife, the most important thing for us is that Clos is gone. Who will take his place after official elections in May? Who knows, but we can only hope that the Catalan voters choose someone who is a little bit more concerned with the fate of the city’s residents than the city’s tourists. Just really quickly, an obituary of the Clos administration: Formerly Mayor of Barcelona, Joan Clos began his career as a medical anaesthetist. He was then invited to take political responsibility for the city council health department at the invitation of the socialist party of Catalunya, PSC. Very quickly, Joan Clos climbed the ladder inside the PSC and was appointed alcalde in 1997 as the temporary replacement of Maragall, later winning official office in the general elections of 1999. After nine years as alcalde, Clos became the Spanish Minister of Industry, taking office on the 8th of September. History will note only two things as Clos’ most remarkable contributions to the city: The Fórum was Clos’ most spectacular disaster and was a major reason for his fall in the public’s opinion. Many campaigned against the Fórum and its thinly veiled excuse to build more hotels and another conference centre. The invented event was looked at as a massive waste of millions of euros that came directly from the taxpayers’ pockets. And… Incivismo — yes, skateboarding is a crime in BCN. A quiet can of beer on a public bench is illegal. The fine if you are caught spitting in a busy area is 700 to 1500¤. (If you’d like to know more details about

what is and isn’t illegal regarding your behavior, please know that the scripted law is not immediately available to the public. It is not in the public libraries. If you wish to print it from the internet it will cost you 1.90¤.) Although Clos is affiliated with the liberal left socialist party, many critics question his commitment to the citizen. While loudly declaring his determination to improve the housing situation, thousands of hotel rooms have opened in the city center under his administration, and the city has a 25% share of the new Miramar hotel on Montjuïc. Monjuïc is theoretically protected against development. A shining example of former mayor Clos’ liberal left fist and its relationship with BCN’s citizens was the macro-botellón that tried to take place in March in the Rambla del Raval. It was a nationwide street party that was met with a battalion of mossos dressed in riot gear. There was a riot that included rubber bullets and burning trash containers, resulting in over 200,000¤ in damage and 80 people injured. The major investments by Clos’ city council have all been to benefit the tourist/visitor sector and not for the citizens of Barcelona. As a result of the repeated investments by the city council to the benefit of the business sector (and not for the poor or other social uses, such as housing), the opposition from citizens to the management by the Council and Joan Clos has been on the increase. At the start of the reign of Joan Clos, the city was not an international tourist centre, and although the Olympics had made major changes to the city with the creation of the Ciudad Olímpica and the development of the beach area, the city was still a city for local people to live in. The cost of living was still low, and people felt that the city was theirs. Joan Clos pushed a hard capitalist style that favoured the business class with bars, restaurants, and hotels to the detriment of normal citizens, who feel that they SMITH have been ignored.

staff Marcus Villaça foundeR / creative director Jennifer Cross co-founder / editor / publisher Lena Wiget managing / listings editor David Tressel copy editor Alfredo Lahoz photo editor Tiffany Carter proofreader / pie baker Laurent Bompard distribution director editorial contributors Hillary Leben, Lady Ordina Osbourne, Alec Radford, Michael Jones, Elliots Dóttir, Alfredo Lahoz, Joe Littenberg, Lena Wiget, Isolda Déulafeu, Nuria Ferrer, Erin Van De Hey, Anna-Maria Masci, Prada García

advertising sales Joe Littenberg joe@bcnweek.com Claire Gunter claire@bcnweek.com Harmony Barry harmony@bcnweek.com Alida Zapata alida@bcnweek.com Michael Roberts michael@bcnweek.com Dom Composto dom@bcnweek.com Kade Agan sales/marketing intern Anna-Maria Masci sales/marketing Intern

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San Gil 2, bajos 2, 08001 Barcelona, Spain info@bcnweek.com | www.bcnweek.com

que diCES?

PH O T O BY A L F RE D O L A H O Z

Have some ‘Que Dices’ you would like to share with the rest of us? Send it to quedices@bcnweek.com

BCN

Week

Actual Quote! “Barcelona isn't a hip resort any more,” he said flatly.“For a start, it’s way too accessible. EasyJet flies there, for God’s sake,as do several other low-cost airlines.There are great big chain hotels opening up pretty much every week. It’s now just a magnet for drunken packs of Brits on stag nights and screaming girls wallpaper’s travel editor jeroen bergmans quoted inn the april 29 edition of the guardian on hen weekends.”

THE LIFECYCLE ISSUE

c’est fini? BARCELONA IS DONE TO A CRISP. THE WORLD HAS MOVED ON. LISBON,BUCHAREST,BEIRUT — ANYWHERE BUT HERE. SO WHY THE HELLARE WE STICKING AROUND? BY

Lena Wiget

London, NY, Paris and Tokyo are places of high density and intensity—meeting points and melting pots. Today, in 2006, Barcelona is no different. It’s a cosmopolitan and multicultural ciudad de cutting edge with a thriving economy that’s rapidly post-industrializing. It’s got everything that everyone seems to want these days: culture, tradition, a dazzling urban scene and Mediterranean savoir de vivre, with beach on one side and mountains on the other. And the whole package is nicely wrapped up in the Catalan quest for independence, which gives the whole scenario a little extra twist. So everything looks picture perfect, right? Okay… ready? …Say “cheeeeeese!”

Barcelona’s star continues to rise on the global stage. Unemployment is down and growth is up. What Barcelona has pulled off in just over a decade has taken other cities half a century to do, but how can a city grow in sync with its culture and people and at the same time carry an increase of 129% in overnight stays (1990 to 2002) and a growth in the foreign population of 10% in just five years (1999 to 2004)? Such rapid growth doesn’t come about without massive pains, so where are the stretch marks on our Mediterranean haven? While the 30+ generation is cracking under the weight of their mortgages and civil organizations in

(1994 and 1995 respectively) and spaces for artists like Hangar (1997) set up in Poble Nou. The competition doesn’t sleep. McDonald’s launches its second, third and fourth franchises, the Hard Rock Café begins selling its hamburgers (1997) and the Maremagnum shows up combining shopping+ food+party (1996). During the research for this article, Clos hadn’t yet left for Madrid, so when asked, Enric Casas, head of the Communications department of the City Hall, preferred not to answer whether his departure will have positive or negative effects on the city. “But yes,” Casas says, “Clos’ reign has contributed to Barcelona’s continued development as a cosmopolitan city.” He mentions Clos’ focus on the tourist industry that has brought Barcelona plenty of international publicity and an international work force, but perspectives change with time. We’ll wait until Clos really has left town and ask Casas again. For now let’s put it this way: if Pasqual Maragall is the godfather of the Olympic Games, Clos—whether or not we can ever forgive him for the Carta Cívica—will go down in history for the Fórum, and the Fórum is a phantasmagoric loner. It has won its award but not the heart of the population. What, though, shall we tell the “cool” folks who’ve already bought their flat in Lisbon and purse their lips when we speak of Barcelona, because all they can think of are stag and hen nights? Andy Capper, Vice magazine’s EU editor, has one answer: “Every city has its shitty areas and good areas. The thing about places that are labeled ‘cool and trendy’ is that the people who label them as such have usually discovered the areas way after they ceased to be cool and trendy.” This may be correct but there is one thing that the ‘cool’ crowd is right about: Barcelona is nada new. Not any longer. It’s been discovered and developed. It’s now integrated into the international circuit, has gotten its make-over and lost in the process a good deal of its otherness and wickedness.

Poble Nou battle against its already decided destiny as an industrial park, Las Ramblas has become a theme park. More hotels, more fast-food chains and more cruise ships arrive every day while social marginalization coexists with opulent lifestyles. And, yes, Barcelona has won over Bread & Butter, but the vibrant design and fashion scene has stayed in Berlin. Are these just normal affairs in the development towards a global, post-industrial metropolis? Or is Barcelona losing it? BCN appears for the first time in the limelight of the international stage with the World Fair in 1888. At the same time, Gaudí, Domènech i Montaner, Santiago Rusiñol and Ramon Casas are laying the foundations of Catalan Modernism. Just a few years later, Picasso will join them at their favorite bohemian hangout, Els Quatre Gats. So far, so good. But after La Feria de Barcelona in 1929, before George Orwell publishes his first 1,500 copies of Homage to Catalonia and right before the Olympic Games in 1936 that BCN should have hosted, the city sinks into the darkness of the civil war and three years later into Franco’s dictatorship. We all know where it went from here: nowhere. In the late 1970s, when the Catalan capital is finally freed from the lingering effects of Franco’s dictatorship and trying out her new democratic movements, Barcelona is in need of serious renewal. Overcrowded and claustrophobic in the center and impoverished on the outskirts of town, Barcelona is anything but guapa. Public spaces? Basically nonexistent. Sea or beach front? No. The coastline is made up of train tracks and garbage dumps. If there is a breeze it wafts in over an industrial port that channels (alongside goods) sailors and their tales into the city. There is a bustling red light district; this, however, is to change rápido y pronto. When we asked Ana María Basulado Deganis, writer for the magazine Arquitectura & Diseño, she painted the following picture: “At the end of the Franco regime

bcn r.i.p.

HOW FAST DO YOU BECOME CUTRE? BY

Tiffany Carter

1986 Barcelona is named site of the 1992 Summer

Olympics in Lausanne, Switzerland on October 17, winning out over Amsterdam, Belgrade, Birmingham, Brisbane and Paris.

1987

Demolition begins in Poble Nou to make way for the future Vila Olímpica. Sant Andreu wins the Guinness world record for the longest banner, vindicating the vecinos in their protest to keep what’s left of their formerly tree-lined, historic XIX century rambla from turning into a highway.

1989 Inauguration of the reformed Olympic Stadium

on Montjuïc. A citizen platform makes public their opposition to the municipal plan to reform the Port Vell.

1990

Number of five-star hotels in Barcelona: 9. Number of passengers passing through Barcelona airport: 9,048,657. Cruise Passengers: 115,137. Passengers on the Bus Turístic: 23,759.

1991

Estimated number of tourists to visit Barcelona: 1,727,610. Estimated foreign population: 23,402 (1.42%)

1992

“do we care?...We do when some hipster like the travel editor of Wallpaper magazine, Jeroen Bergmans, pronounces Barcelona as finished.To claim that an age-old city is over and out just because Easyjet and Ryanair now transport drunken Brits to its ancient barris is disgustingly superficial...There are still other realities in Barcelona that run parallel to Disneylonia.” and at the beginning of the new democracy, Barcelona was a melancholic city covered in soot, but with points of, let’s say, ‘aesthetic resistance.’ During that time, a phenomenon was happening that seems incredible in today’s Barcelona—a Las Ramblas where groups of leftist writers, designers and architects met in the evenings and stayed until the early morning on the terraces of the Café de la Opera and others around, jostling with the characters from the Barrio Chino. Today, the only remnant of this Barcelona is the restaurant Flash-Flash, which anticipated the ‘design’ years that were to come and Barcelona’s destined international triumph.” In 1986, while the avant-garde turns night into day and the Javis, Jordis and Núrias are taking their first steps in the wake of the new democracy, Barcelona wins its bid for the Olympic Games. The reawakening of Catalan culture and self-esteem falls together with massive investments and infrastructural improvements, injecting $16.6 m into the Spanish economy over the period between 1986 and 1993. Clever city planning changes poorly designed roads and beltways that, instead of increasing travel efficiency, had effectively acted as barriers to the peripheral neighborhoods. “The Olympic Games literally brought light into the city,” says Dr. Andrés Walliser, fellow of the Centro de Estudios Sociales at the Fundación Juan March. The urban landscape opens up, Barcelona begins to breathe fresh air, and a cosmopolitan and multicultural redolence rests over the redesigned city. But after the athletes have left, a new race of a different kind begins. Barcelona has said hola to the world and now it gets its answer: go global or die. So while el disseny continues to flourish, IKEA sets up in Badalona (1996). At the same time, a lively international music scene develops (Sónar really is the tip of the iceberg), the CCCB and the MACBA open

As with any product—and that’s precisely what a city is when it goes global—there will be a time when it becomes mainstream. The innovators, as they are called in Diffusion Research, the lone, adventurous backpacker and richy-rich global jetsetters have moved on. Where have they gone? To Athens maybe? Or Bucharest? Do we care? We do when some hipster like the travel editor of Wallpaper magazine, Jeroen Bergmans, pronounces Barcelona as finished. To claim that an age-old city is over and out just because Easyjet and Ryanair now transport drunken Brits to its ancient barris is disgustingly superficial. Having said that, we must acknowledge that the times of Flash-Flash are definitively over, and the left-wing avant-garde sitting in a bar on Las Ramblas is nothing more than a romantic anecdote from an era past. Nowadays, the Ramblas seem hyperreal, like a simulation. The real thing has disappeared. And it’s not just Las Ramblas or Park Güell. Tourists these days are served a lot of pre-programmed, pre-packaged leisure yum-yums, giving you an uncanny Matrix kind of feeling that if you stick your finger out, the walls will start to wobble. Welcome to our word, the postmodernists would say. But we’re not there just yet. There are still other realities in Barcelona that run parallel to Disneylonia. Catalan pensament, designs, rhythms and lifestyle are anything but over. It just depends on what you go for—the blue pill or the red pill. And what shall we tell the new mayor? Live and let live. Give the city a break. Wait for the next world event and allow Poble Nou residents some space. Look at the emptiness around the luxury towers of Diagonal Mar, look at La Mina, and learn from Clos’ mistakes. And while we’re at it: spare Barcelona from the Hard Rock Hotel. What they’re doing to Madrid right now is not pretty. Barcelona really doesn’t need it. What Barcelona needs is more Barcelona.

The Summer Olympics begin on July 25. Barcelona has regained many kilometers of beach between the Besòs River and the Barceloneta. An entire new barrio marítimo has been created. The Diagonal has been extended by 50%.

1994 Barcelona, a film about Ted, a stiff from Illinois

working in the Barcelona office of his company and receiving a visit from his Navy Seal cousin, whereupon they go bar-hopping and tail-chasing, is released. Costars Mira Sorvino. The first Sónar Festival takes place. Visitors to Sagrada Familia: 700,000.

1995

Number of passengers passing through Barcelona airport: 11,727,814. Cruise Passengers: 233,389. Passengers on the Bus Turístic: 131,600. The first Primavera Sound Festival takes place. The MACBA opens its doors on November 28.

1997 In September, Joan Clos i Matheu becomes

mayor of Barcelona, succeeding Pasqual Maragall i Mira.

1998 Café Zurich reopens, completely renovated. 1999 Lonely Planet releases the first edition of their

Barcelona guidebook in April. Festival Grec ticket sales: 177,854

2000 Number of passengers passing through

Barcelona airport: 19,808,812. Cruise Passengers: 572,571. Passengers on the Bus Turístic: 873,611. The Rambla del Raval is completed in September.

2002

The Peseta is replaced by the Euro. Starbucks arrives to BCN.

2003 Number of five-star hotels in Barcelona: 11. Festival Grec ticket sales: 131,148

2004 Barcelona hosts the Universal Forum of

Cultures. In April, the Ajuntament declares Barcelona officially anti-bullfighting, but continues selling bull figurines and souvenirs in their gift shops at the City Information Office, l’Institut de Cultura and the Museu de l’Historia de la Ciutat. A new municipal ordinance goes into effect in October, prohibiting savage animals in public spectacles. No more tigers, elephants and lions for the Gran Circ Mundial.

2005

Spain begins the process of granting legal amnesty for up to 800,000 illegal immigrants. Number of passengers passing through Barcelona airport: 27,095,754. Cruise Passengers: 1,228,561. Estimated number of tourists to visit Barcelona: 5,061,264. Estimated foreign population: 248,091 (15.39%). Number of five-star hotels: 13. Passengers on the Bus Turístic: 1,632,933. Visitors to Sagrada Familia: 2,376,780.

2006 New incivisme laws go into effect. No more

brown-bagging, street prostitution and, hey, screw the homeless. Smoking is banned in offices and many bars and restaurants. The Ajuntament closes down some well-known and beloved historic establishments of the night, including La Paloma and El Cangrejo, for making too much noise. The airport is expected to exceed 30 million passengers. A coffee at Café Zurich will run you 1.05¤ unless you want a table. Then it’s 1.80¤

2008 The new south terminal of the El Prat airport is expected to begin operations.

BCN

Week

Guiri Trivia! During the first three years of his tenure as mayor, Clos spent 25,900,360 euros on publicity,which doesn't take into account the 2,725,090 euros spent in television commercials and the 6,002,400 euros budgeted to BTV,which was already in debt 1,500,000 euros. Joaquim Roglan, Què Esteu Fent amb Barcelona?

IT’S ALL ABOUT ‘ENDEMIC SPECIES’ PUSHING OUT THOSE THAT HAVE BEEN HERE OR A VERY LONG TIME.

GUIRIS STRUGGLE TO STAY IN CITY THEY THOUGHT THEY LOVED. A ‘REALITY’ SHOW. BY

Hillary Leben

It must be stated that Poppy and Johnny are still going strong as far as I know. Skye is history: gone to live in the South of France with her parents. The irony is that I have cracked. Me. The presenter of this reality show. I’m going home, and I’m not sorry. This is the farewell episode and we are going to look into the cracking phenomenon. What happens to us that makes us leave the city we thought we wanted to stay in “forever”? I have some theories. Do you want to hear them? I don’t think you really have a choice since I am the one in control here, and you are merely a passive reader probably on the verge of cracking yourself. There are many classes of Guiri, from what I have seen:

cage dressing WE INTERVIEW LONG-TIME VECINO MARC RAVALAJAS WHO HAS SEEN A THING OR ZOO BY

Lena Wiget

We were searching for an outspoken Barcelonan who’d lived in the old town long enough to see it changing when we were pointed towards Marc. “That’s your guy,” he’d said—and left it at that. Curious, we meet Marc on a cloudy afternoon at a restaurant around the corner from his flat where he’s eating an 8¤ menu. Marc is Catalan, born and bred. His black hair is sprinkled with grey. He’s wearing Birkenstocks, a stripy black and white T-shirt and Lee jeans. He works with computers and databases during the day and when he comes home, he comes home to the Raval. What have been the hallmarks in Barcelona’s development during the last 20 years? It might sound like a joke, but the Olympic Games and the Forum have been nothing more than a smoke screen. What has been most important is the secret extension of the Zoo towards the Ciutat Vella. What do you mean by the extension of the Zoo? Nowadays, you find endemic species, like the human statues that only occur in similar habitats: watering places of international standing like Starbucks and international feeding troughs aka Scottish fast-food chains (note: he means McDonald’s). Other primeval specimens threatened by extinction that appeal less to the visitors, like the drunken grandpa or the impudent whore, have been pushed to the periphery of the park. (Smiles) The amplification and the Carta Cívica are nothing more than a redecoration of the cages. If you look at it from this perspective you have to admit its success. (Smiles broadly) Do you think Barcelona is still cool? Barcelona was cool in the 80s when el disseny erupted with force and changed the grays of a mediocre city for the neon lights and blazing colors of a radical modernity. That anchored Barcelona’s brand, which was later projected during the Olympic Games and the Fórum. And then what happened? The first people who took the bait believed themselves to be the pioneers, the heroes in the discovery of a new city; as all the holiday makers have dragged their sandals along Las Ramblas and bought their standard wear at Zara, Barcelona has become less and less exclusive and fashionable. As for the mid-term residents who live their personal down-and-out in Mataró and Barcelona and who stay solely among themselves: they may as well be in Haifa. So run and begin Haifa Week—the last to arrive is the first to regret.

BCN

Week

1 The student Guiri: This breed cracks as soon as their semester is up. They talk of returning, but never do. 2 The “live on my savings and work here and there” Guiri: This raza cracks as soon as their savings get low enough that they actually have to start living the reality of finding a real job in BCN. O sea, getting paid crap and keeping up with the high cost of living. 3 And then there’s me, the “move to Spain with enough money to eat for a month, no papers, and no contacts” guiri, otherwise known as tonta. Or you could use the gentler adjective, naïve, if you like: If this guiri wants to “just get by,” they might find employment passing out flyers for chupitos gratis, babysitting, working at a call center, or the inevitable job of teaching English. This guiri doesn’t have enough to salir. They don’t have enough to viajar. But this guiri may take the longest to crack, because they are waiting for everything to get easier. It must be a long wait because I’ve luchado for two years, it’s been an uphill battle, and I’m not talking about Montserrat, baby. Today I worked my last day as a tourist guide on a bicycle. I had to be there at 8 am. Well, I got off the train in Plaza Catalunya thinking, “maybe this will be a

nice last day of work — a Barcelona early morning without the normal tourist stampede, a look at Las Ramblas when it is a little more tranquilo.” My stroll from Plaza Catalunya to Barrio Gótico was a little less than gleeful. I saw a guy that looked like he had been beaten up, a shirtless man passed out in the street (with a group of viejitas looking on), desperate prostitutes still hopeful for one last client, and frighteningly disheveled perverts gawking and muttering who knows what, in who knows what language, surely threatening to follow me. Pee. Urine. Puke. Yuck. Very romantic. Upon arrival at the bike shop I found a locked door awaiting me, a dubious puddle in the street, and a stench that was inaguantable. I was informed when the bike guy got there that arriba lives a señora who has been driven mad by the noise made by the bar-goers. Every so often at around the times the bars let out, she throws a bucket of urine and mierda into the street from her top floor window, drenching the drunks below. You know what? That is fucking nasty. I’m not saying this moment made me crack, but I am SO ready to get my culo out of this city. I think there is a somewhat desperate situation seething through the veins of BCN. I promised the editors no Catalan bashing, but a lot of them hate us. And they don’t even know us! And yes, I know what’s waiting for me in the USA. I am willing to tolerate meatheads who can’t stop talking about the size of their own dicks, skinny women who lack attention like they lack fat intake, yuppies, performance artists, hummers, Starbucks, super-size, Elimidate, bleach blonds, people who go to the gym and “work on their backs,” schmoozers, romantic comedies, bands that are cooler than you… please add your own items to the list. I want my family. I want my friends. I want a steak. I want financial security. And then I’m going to travel but only on vacations during which I will spend my money freely and get wasted. And I’m never going to look at loquo.com again— not as long as I live. Bona nit y adéu.

Week BCN

R O U N DTA B L E S LOOKING FOR PEOPLE IN NEED OF CLOTHING AND BEER! Believe it or not we care about you faithful BCN WEEK reader. In our quest to become the most widely read and sought after English publication in BCN we need to know what you think about us. We are seeking 21 people to join the BCN WEEK roundtables. In exchange for your time and tender love we will give you an American Apparel T-shirt, beer and an evening you won't soon forget. To join the roundtables email jenn@bcnweek.com.

LAVERONICA.qxd

19/6/06

12:26

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PIZZA & SALADS / TERRACE SUN & SHADE / “TAKE AWAY” MON–FRI 19:30-1:30 / SAT 12:30-1:30 KITCHEN OPEN NON STOP

OV E RH E A R D BY

Erin Van de Hey

‘elprat’ * * * English wife, holding stuffed toro in gift shop: “Ooh, look at this adorable little cow!” Disinterested husband: “Uh huh.” English wife, squeezing toro to make it moo:“Ooh, it’s so darling—the cow moos!” Disinterested husband:“It’s a bull, not a cow.” English wife:“all right, but it’s so adorable and it moos!” Disinterested husband: “Bulls don’t moo.” * * * Boyfriend, running:“Hurry up!” Girlfriend, lagging:“But I have to go to the toilet!” Boyfriend:“God,again? We’re going to be late!” Girlfriend:“It’s your fault I drank so much!”

* * * Mom,answering mobile: “Hello,what? Is this important? Honey, come on, I’m in Barcelona, is this an emergency? No, I don’t know…Come on, if you’re hungry just look in the refrigerator!” * * * Belligerent girl:“…and I just couldn’t stand it anymore, so I told her to shut the fuck up!” Friend:“What did she do?” Belligerent girl:“Nothing. What was she going to do? She was like a chihuahua with pink lipstick and a Chanel handbag.” * * * Girl discussing okupas: “Anarchists are so stupid. I mean,just because you hate

“Anarchists are so stupid. I mean,just because you hate the government doesn’t mean you have to dress like shit.” * * * Burly man on mobile:“No, no…I am telling you not to do this…No,absolutely not…No, you’re NOT going to do it just because I said not to…No, I’m serious…I swear…No! Uh huh…ok, mm hmm…See, I knew you’d agree with me.Yeah, ok, do whatever you want.” * * * Easyjet check-in counter, during the most recent huelga: Wishful passenger:“So,what you’re saying is that there are no flights today?” Employee:“Yes.” Wishful passenger:“Um, so what should I do?” Employee:“You can call this number.” (writes down tollfree number) Wishful passenger:“Will they be able to help me?” Employee.“I doubt it…Who’s next in line?”

the government doesn’t mean you have to dress like shit.” * * * Security line: Kid:“Mom! I’m thirsty.” Mom:“Well, honey, I’m sorry, but that’s the irrational world we live in,where little kids can’t have water to drink.”

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WE SPEAK ENGLISH, SPANISH, ITALIAN AND FRENCH

* * * Heart of coal:“I was looking forward to going home for a visit, but I found out my cousin died of an overdose.” Nicer friend: “Oh my god, that’s terrible!” Heart of coal:“Yeah, no kidding, but I hope it doesn’t mean we have to cancel the barbecue.” * * * Killjoy: “No, don’t lick that, it’s magic! You can’t lick magic!”

Carrer Marquès de Barberà 15 (only 100m from Rambla)

TEL (+34)933041885 BCN

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LA FATXA BY

Isolda Dosrius Déulafeu

ride a Bycicle “...l’Ajuntament posarà a disposició dels barcelonins i barcelonines tres mil bicicletes de lloguer que es podran trobar en un total de 250 punts de recollida automàtics...” These socialist guys are clever, very sharp. They’re experts to copy and paste the European initiatives, e.g. Lion, London and Viena. Really we’ll be the first in the ecological cities’ ranking... But these quick boys forget that the European citizens are used to ride bicycles, but we aren’t. Yes! I can not imagine our Excel.lentíssim riding a bicycle. You remember the radio interview in El dia sense cotxes? L’Excel.lentíssim went to the radio studio with car!! He didn’t know what buses or metro to take to go there... Incredible!! One radio listener phoned them and tell him how to arrive to the radio adress taking the public

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best city in the world are: 1 Use bicycle... and... expose our body to the danger of the streets, and, if we’re lucky, someone only robs it an average of 10 times per year. 2 Park our cars in the green or blue areas, it depends on our padró... and... pay an astronomical price for that. 3 Take one of the most expensive public transport in Spain... and... yet again, pay an astronomical price for that. 4 Separate the rubbish... and... use 25 square meters to do that in our houses, taking in account we have an average of 50 square meters to live. Well, I don’t, my flat has 110 square meters. 5 Be solidari with foreigner people... and... lose your dignity when they rob your wallet. I don’t want to remember more Com-

But the King... Ooooh! The King riding a bicycle and saluting the plebeyos? The King followed by his savebacks... savebacks? The King followed by his bodyguards riding a bicycle too? I can not imagine!! Quina falta de respecte!! transport. After this, can you imagine l’Excel.lentíssim riding a bycycle? I can not... ...in order to be coherent, all visitors in BCN would have to ride a bicycle. All kind of visitors, not only the current citizens. For example, when the State’s President comes here, or the King... I don’t care for the President, is he socialist? Yes? Then, he has to set an example to the people. But the King... Ooooh! The King riding a bicycle and saluting the plebeyos? The King followed by his savebacks... savebacks? The King followed by his bodyguards riding a bicycle too? I can not imagine!! Quina falta de respecte!! Have to remember the Royal Protocols. These socialist guys aren’t fair. Because they promote the sustentaible and ecological city, but are us, the citizens, who have to built it, not them. Our Ten Commandments to be the

manaments... és vergonyós. With another party, the things will be another thing. What?? For this service we have to pay a little price: 1 euro per hour!! And we have to thank them the first half hour will be free. Wow! I’m impressed, and more if I take in account that “...aquest servei s’ha pogut finançar amb els excedents que ha produït la implantació de l’àrea verda a Barcelona...” And later, what kind of thing they’ll finance thanks to the benefit of the bicycles bussiness? But this isn’t for you, guiris. Are you barcelonins? Don’t worry, I think more than 50% of guiris haven’t car, don’t pay the taxes, don’t pay the blue or green area. Don’t worry, these matters are a privilegi of Bons Barcelonins. Barcelonins, think about Rage Against song: now you do that they told you... is it?

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SOLO BITCHIN’

e.r. it ain’t an afternoon in purgatory

It’s Saturday mid-day, and I’ve just made myself a salad with the avocados I bought a few days ago. I’ve taken one bite when, all of a sudden, I feel a tightness on the left side of my throat, under my jaw. I raise my hand for preliminary investigation and discover that I’ve suddenly developed a lump the size of a smashed Donete where my fucking gland used to be. Being somewhat hypochondriacal, and thus looking to fan the flames, I immediately go to the WebMD self-diagnosis homepage to determine how soon I’ll die. Now, normally, all roads on WebMD lead to cancer, but once in a while they’ve got something a little juicier for you, a little more urgent, and this happened to be one of those days. “A lump in the neck or throat, especially when it develops quickly, could be a sign of a severe allergic reaction, possibly anaphylactic. Emergency care is always needed.” I decide to walk to the Red Cross, which is a few blocks away. My freak-out adrenaline is pumping, and the swelling seems to be getting worse. I swear I can now feel my throat tightening. Oh my God, I do not want to collapse in front of the Damm factory. Maybe I should have taken a cab? When I get to Urgencies, I find a little glass booth and a girl inside. I tell her I think I’m having an allergic reaction and she, responding as though I have asked her where the cereal aisle is at the grocery store, tells me to go back outside and follow the yellow line on the ground. I follow the line up into the bowels of this building that looks like it was built in 1950 and hasn’t been maintained since. At the real reception desk, I am momentarily distracted from my hysteria by the cute male receptionist talking in hushed tones with an English guy who wants a prescription. Liverpool is fighting about the price.

My face feels tight and hot. After five minutes of watching these negotiations, and only thinking any minute now, I’m going to collapse, and I’ll only have myself to blame for not forcing my presence on the stupid hospital personnel, I finally lean in and say, “Excuse me, but I think my throat is closing up.” Okay, what did I expect? What public healthcare planet do I think I’m living on? The receptionist, who is now looking remarkably like a rodent, says, “I’m dealing with this other patient. Why don’t you go wait in the waiting room?” So I do. For two hours. The first 30 minutes I am not a happy camper, as twisted ankle after broken toe keep passing in to see the doctor before me. But then the swelling starts to go down and I take a look around. The emergency room is like the anti-bar. All the drinks available are stimulants rather than depressants, no one talks to anyone else, four generations of a family will come in together. Everyone knows he’s going to be there for hours, but no one does anything but stare at the wall. There is no music. The employees do not give a fuck about attending to you promptly. Unless you’re one of the people with a broken ankle, seeking same, you don’t want to pick anyone up, because he might have a horrible reason for being there. I finally get in to see the doctor. They take my temperature, determine I don’t have a fever, and basically tell me that they think my salivary gland is clogged, which “happens sometimes.” I ask them why. They don’t know, but perhaps I’d like some Ibuprofen? I get lost looking for the exit. Someone who looks like he has just escaped from the psych ward helps me find my way out. On the street, night has fallen, and I’ve whiled away my evening with strangers again. Ah well. At least my liver can’t complain in the morning.

Núria Ferrer

L THE

BLACK HORSE L

FIGURAS

the hamaca man I’ve been kicked out of bars by bouncers, out of stores by managers, out of the house by my mother, out of class by teachers. But I’ll bet not many mediocre rebels like me have been kicked out of their beach chair in Bogatell by a software engineer. Even you may have been kicked off one of the many lounge chairs, or hamacas, that litter the Barcelona beaches. You sat down, set up shop, and played stupid when someone, mysteriously, came to ask you for money. But you could only play dumb for so long, and then he gave you the boot. But you’ll never know if you were booted by a software engineer or a biochemist, because you didn’t stop to ask. Juan Luís is a short and extremely brown man. He was wearing shorts, a t-shirt, a cheap cap and sported a fanny-pack slung across his chest from shoulder to hip like a bandolier. A fine layer of dust the Ajuntament of Barcelona likes to advertise as “sand” covered his entire person. He tried to kick guiri number 4,619 (me) off of an unpaid-for lounge chair. I fought back with a barrage of questions, buying myself as much time as I could, like that time I held my position in an unoccupied first-class airline seat for a grand total of 43 seconds. A ver if I can last a little longer this time… So, Juan Luis, how much do these here hamacas cost? 4¤ for the whole day. But it’s late, do I get a discount now? No. You mean there is no price fluctuation at all? None. (Damn — these

Joe Littenberg

one-line responses aren’t gonna keep me on this seat for long. Running time = 00:22). Are they yours? No. They belong to the business. Oh, there’s a business? Si. It’s a family business. Is it your family? No, I just work here. Where are you from? Bolivia. And how long have you been here? I’ve been doing this for one month, but I’ve been here for five. There’s no work in Bolivia. I was studying before, and when I finished there was no work. So I came here. (He’s talkin’ now! Time = 01:13) What did you study? I’m a software engineer. After I finished studying, I gave classes for a while, but they paid me next to nothing. So I came here. (01:58) So, you’re going to go back? Si, si. I’m going back to start a business. I’m saving money here like crazy. I make good money. They pay me 1,100¤ a month. DAMN!!! And when people ask me if I want to go out to eat I say, stay here, I’ll cook for you, and you can pay me. Do you know Bolivian food? Do you like picante? (03:34) Love it. I don’t have amigos. I’m single. No sé ligar. And it’s hard to be here at the beach with chicas lindas everywhere when you can’t talk to them. Just be yourself, man. The lifeguards are guapas, too. That one up there is Spanish and the other is Argentine. I like the Spanish one more. (04:49) Can you get up now? I have to finish working. (05:03) Who’s the man? Yeah, that’s right. 0.0419 centimos worth of free lounge chair chillin’.

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the week BY

Lena Wiget

thursday /// sept 14 The galleries have taken a bit longer to wake up from their beauty sleep but this week there’s plenty of new art on idle white gallery walls. At 19:30h the exhibition “Hybrids” by Michelle Concepción will be inaugurated at Galeria Safia – these are large scale paintings that give you the feeling that the artist has moved very close if not inside the object. At 20:00h the Venezuelan painter Rodolfo Villaplana opens his exhibition “En El Otro Lado” at Altercultura and the Maxalot Gallery also has a new show on offer: DOMA, the graphic design studio from Buenos Aires and Miami, presents a characterparade of life-size and miniature plush dolls, 2D prints and graffiti, and motion graphics. Long overdue: Barcelona’s first queer video festival tranZmariKaboLlo launches today (14 to 16 September). It’s born of a collective yearning to compile and diffuse non-commercial videos with sexually stray themes. The evening begins with cocktails at 18:00h at Telenoika, with 23 short videos to follow and later a performance from Erika Duende and Ogou/Zou, Las Estrellas. Club-wise, Nuggets at Apolo [2] is the call of the day. The theme tonight is Modern Bands & Modern Beats with Viva Maestro (electro pop), Jon Kennedy (Grand danzarama1.qxd

9/5/06

9:03 PM

Central Records, Manchester, UK) who’ll play songs from his new album “Wooden Toys” and modern funk & soul from DJ Gruyere (Cheese recs, Vilanova) and Antonio Requena (Marula Café, Madrid). GALERIA SAFIA @ BRUNIQUER 9, BAJOS // ALTERCULTURA @ JOAQUÍN COSTA 24, 3O // MAXALOT GALLERY @ PALMA DE SANT JUST 9 // TELENOIKA @ AURORA AND CARRETES // APOLO [2] @ NOU DE LA RAMBLA 111

friday /// sept 15 Iguapop is inaugurating its third anniversary show “We make money, not art”, a group exhibition with works by Blami, Victor Castillo, Catalina Estrada, Adolf Gil, Jaime Hayon, Boris Hoppek, Tim Biskup, Miss Van, Sergio Mora, Rai Escale and Paco y Manolo. The video festival tranZmariKaboLlo has moved to Hangar for today and tomorrow where they’re showing more queer short films from 19:00h til 21:00h. The Festival Asia (Asian cinema, theatre, dance and concerts from 15 to 17 September) is currently in town before the guests from the lands of the rising sun move on to Madrid. It kicks off with traditional Philippine dance at the Mercat de les Flors at 20:00h, while in the Mercat’s Jardines Fabià Puigserver Asian cuisines cater for the hungry. The party will move to

La Paloma at 24:00h where the Indian Punjabi Group and DJ Ganesh from Paris serve Oriental tunes for 10¤ at the door.The band The Great Toad offers a bit of swingy country music at the Centre Garcilaso tonight for free, starting at 22:00h and a free Blues concert begins at 21:30 at the Plaça A. Pestanya. The alternativeminded may want to check out the Espai Jove in Poblenou where at 22:00h local bands (hip hop, skacore, punk) rock the stage under the motto “No Ens Aturaran 06”. And IDC, who was last seen in Barcelona at Summercase, joins DJ Gato at Sala Razz to play his latest mix-ups, remixes and re-edits. Entrance is 15 Euros. IGUAPOP GALLERY @ COMERÇ 15 // HANGAR @ CAN RICART, PG DEL MARQUÉS DE STA. ISABEL 40 // ESPAI JOVE POBLENOU @ LLACUNA-RAMÓN TURRÓ // CENTRE GARCILASO @ JUAN DE GARAY 116-118 // RAZZ @ ALMOGÀVERS 122

saturday/// sept 16 The artist Matías Perego currently has a show at Almazen (17:00h to 22:00h) called “Cabeza Suelta No Puede Decir Nada” where he exhibits his criticalhumoristic drawings and paintings. Ideal for the Saturday lunch menú: Asian food at the Jardines Fabià Puigserver at the Mercat de les Flors. Starts at 12:00h and wraps up late in the evening. Also part of the Festival Asia is the screening of the film Paap (India, 2003) by Pooja Bhatt at Cinema Casablanca at 20:00h. Entrance costs 5¤. At the CCCB, the third Hip Hop Festival Hipnotik is kicking off with a program to make the hearts of the fans of this hip subcul-

ture beat faster: MC battles, break dance and graffiti competitions, DJ and hip hop writing workshops and talks about “Music in the digital age.” The festival runs from 11:00h to 24:00h and entrance costs 5¤. The evening show, which starts at 21:00h, costs 24¤ at the door. The “Super MCs” are definitely worth a look but then so are the young talents playing at the C3 bar (Puto Coke, Soko Rios, Black Bee, Scurro, Tajo, Hdl gang, Dj Asmatic, Arg, Pura Conciencia, Crae, Kmk and many more). At the Espai Jove in L’Eixample it’s Urban Tango time at 17:00h. The festival presents traditional music in a new light. New and established musicians demonstrate their skills while a mercadillo and empanada stands help to empty wallets fill tummies. At 22:00h DJ Roger spins at Dos Trece. On his playlist: everything from the classics — James Brown, George Clinton, Curtis Mayfield, Betty Davis through to the current funky practitioners – Quantic Soul Orchestra, Sharon Jones, Breakestra & Plantlife. Nothing can go wrong. Entrance is free. Also free is the Altimira Festival taking place at Parc del Turonet in Cerdanyola del Vallès (still BCN). It starts off at 17:00h. On stage: X-milk, NoWayOut, Dikers, No Children, The Defense, The Eyes, Yawn, Cancerberos and Hateache. At Razz’s Pop Bar the Swedish duo Lo-Fi-Fnk (electro dance pop from Stockholm), who have just launched their new CD Boylife, plays at 1:00h. Entrance costs 15¤ at the door. MERCAT DE LES FLORS @ LLEIDA 59 // CASABLANCA @ GIRONA 173-175 // CCCB @ MONTALEGRE 5 // ESPAI JOVE L’EIXAMPLE @ ALI BEI 120 // DOS TRECE @ CARME 40 // RAZZ @ ALMOGÀVERS 122

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DANZARAMA_ RESTAURANT + CLUB Gran Via 604, Esquina Balmes / Open every day of the year from 7AM to 3AM We do group reservations, private parties, private room rentals, and all types of events Cutting edge design / Exquisite mediterranean gastronomy / Excellent quality and price / Amazing selection of music

BCN

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How to get to Danzarama_ Metro_ Universidad (Line 1/red + Line 2/purple)

Bus_ Pl. Universidad (N1, N2, N3, N8, N12, N13, N14, N15) tel (+34) 93 301 97 43 info (+34) 93 342 52 70 fax (+34) 93 301 22 91 www.danzarama.com danzarama@gruporepris.com

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BAR/FOOD

KABARA J U N TA D E C O M E R Ç , 2 0

TEL. 934 12 76 98

From its mismatched dining chairs gathered around colorful paint-splashed tables to its saucy red ambience complete with modernísimo lighting concepts and cleverly hidden folding tabletops, Kabara is the quintessential Barcelona bar and restaurant. Open seven nights a week (and soon to include mediodía), Kabara offers a varied menu including Tzatziki, stuffed grape leaves, pita sandwiches (try the Cubano), and falafel. When you are done, why not split an order of profiteroles in chocolate sauce? Or a hookah? Or have a drink from the massive bar that dominates the interior? The music is chill and the seating is plentiful, so kick back and stay until closing time (1:00h weekdays, 3:00h weekends).

DIY

CLOISTERS OF THE UNIVERSITAT G R A N V Í A D E L E S C O R T E S C AT A L A N E S , 5 8 5

There are places in this city that make you want to do things. Take off your clothes at la Nova Mar Bella, be a complete snob in Francesc Macià, study quietly at the old Universitat building in the so-named plaça, etc. The lush cloisters of the latter, though, make you want to do absolutely nothing. This interior garden, complete with benches for sitting and paths for strolling, is a great place to enjoy a cigarette break or just get away and chill for free, because, unlike everywhere else in that area, nothing is on sale. Though you will mostly find students and professors, this downtown gem is open to the public during regular university hours and offers a library-like silence completely unique to the area. Bring a snack or a drink (no botellones, though, as the University guards are on duty) and take a break, and once you’ve had enough, remember that all the action is right outside the front door.

M I D D L E E A S T E R N FA R E

RAJAH NOU DE LA RAMBLA, 1-3

If shawarma is what you want (and it always is), Rajah is where you need to get it. For 3,50¤ you will be served a sandwich so big that only the sturdiest patron could lift and consume it. But consume you must, enjoying the essence of Indian curry in every bite. Ali, the man responsible for dishing up delicious, is a constant fountain of incomprehensible but amicable conversation while you wait, and he will honor even the most meticulous order (extra tomatoes, no

onions, and lots of spicy, please). And if it is for two, he will cut it in half revealing what looks like a California roll on steroids. Whether beginning or ending your night, make sure to mingle with the other patrons gathered around the door. Everyone’s a friend when waiting for shawarma, and as Rajah is strategically located near some of the best bars and discos in the city (la Concha, London Bar, Jamboree, Enfants), you will probably meet again on the dance floor.

B E S T B AT H R O O M

L’ANTIQUARI VEGUER, 13

G E L A T O H E AV E N

GELATERIA CAFFETTERIA ITALIANA P L A Ç A D E L A R E V O LU C I Ó , 2 T E L . 9 3 2 1 0 2 3 3 9

Take a number. Yes, there are 40 people in front of you, but don’t walk away, because in about 15 minutes you will be called to make your selection amongst the over 25 different flavors of amazing homemade Italian gelato. Over 25, that is, unless you come late. Gina and Marina, the mother-daughter ice cream team from Rome, make everything themselves and it sells out on a daily basis. They implemented the

number system to avoid chaos, and it is true that from Wednesday through Sunday a bustling, ice cream-sated peace reigns in the plaça. At peak hours it seems that everyone is dipping into either a cone or tarrina with a colorful mini-shovel and a smile on their face. This will only last until November 1st, though, for that is when Gina and Marina return to Italy, and they won’t be back until early March.

TEL. 933 10 04 35

Not a single negative adjective can be attributed to L’antiquari, for it is clean, hospitable, comfortable, cheap (a caña costs 1,90 at the bar), and varied. You have three official seating options (terraza, bar or upstairs), and one not so official (the large corner bank of stairs—just order your drinks to go), and all offer a different experience. While the bar is the loudest and most animated, you will find both the terraza and upstairs to be much more low key. If you choose the stairs, well, you are already one step away from a botellón, so why not just go ahead and do it? Not to encourage delinquency, but rumor has it that the small oasis that is Plaça del Rei is rarely frequented by police, though you will get the chance to hear random and often very good minstrels. Don’t forget to go to the bathroom before you leave, as they are among the cleanest and best equipped (i.e.: toilet paper a plenty) in the city.

BCN

Week

ENGRANDE_new3.qxd

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2:39 AM

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sunday/// sept 17 Sundays are great days to sleep off a hangover and to start the day with a three course menú at the restaurant around the corner. But not this one. Hipnotik continues at the CCCB (for times and prices see Saturday). At the Plaça Ovidi Montllor of the Mercat de les Flors you can see demonstrations by masters of Indian dance (12:30h), Kung-Fu (13:30h) and Aikido, while at the Plaça Rius i Taulet jazz bands (Carme Cuesta & Joan Sanmartí at 12:00h and Shark at 13:00h) play for free as part of the 16th Festival L’Hora del Jazz. The Nou Barris are hosting a Blues festival and today is the last chance to catch a free concert at the Plaça Àngel Pestaña. On stage is Mr. Jones Band from Barcelona at 18:00h followed by Paul Lamb & The Kind Snakes (UK). CCCB @ MONTALEGRE 5 // MERCAT DE LES FLORS @ LLEIDA 59

IF YOU THINK YOU’VE GOT IT SEND US YOUR CV AND SAMPLES OF WORK TO

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the week

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NOBODY’S TALKING ABOUT YOUR PRODUCT

tuesday/// sept 19 Last week, Ras (11:00h to 21:00h),

Astrolona Aries

Taurus Did you see the Marilyn Monroe

Scorpio In January 2005, a rat snake in

exhibition in the Palau Robert? It consisted of lots of dresses, personal photographs, shoes, and random knickknacks.What was most poignant for me was a swan-shaped iron ashtray that appears in police pictures of her dead and naked body. It was on her bedside table. Please be careful not to get mixed up in the shadow of another’s tragedy—I’d prefer you to be the star of your own comedy.This week you’ll be presented with this choice.

the Tokyo zoo was given a hamster as a meal, and they formed a friendship instead. The same year an orphaned baby hippo adopted a 100year-old tortoise as his new parental figure. In 2002, a lioness was observed by game officials caring for three baby oryx and protecting them from the pride. These bizarre relationships, spanning the divide between predator and prey and species, are you this week. Don’t be surprised if you wake up with an elephant in your heart.

Cancer

Fantastic things will happen to you at your job this week, but they’re not job related. Remember that saying that there is no real destination,that it’s all about the journey? Your job is much more temporary than you think and doesn’t define you—be open to its grander purpose.

they always said it would be,and just recognizing that fact scares you. I say you should go out and get fucked up. Do drugs. Drink too much. Have casual sex.Throw it all away.This is a great solution.This will make you feel complete.

Libra Yesterday I was at a bottle factory. There were thousands and thousands of bot

BCN

Week

Lady Ondina Osborne

tles stacked everywhere. I thought about all the messages one could send,thousands of bottles with little notes floating in the wide sea. And then I thought of you and how your methods of communication have been just as effective recently.Work on it.

Virgo Time is flying, isn’t it? It’s just like

+34 93 269 09 93

Have you started making plans for the winter holidays? Pay attention because something will be happening this week that relates directly to your plans. It won’t be as obvious as a door slamming;you should rather listen for the quiet opening of a window.

ing people off. Of course it’s your nature to lead, but you’ve been crossing the line. Chill out. Give in. Let go of the stress of always needing to be right.

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wednesday/// sept 20

CLUB CAPITOL @ LA RAMBLA 138 // LLANTIOL TEATRE @ RIERETA 7 // BIG BANG BAR @ BOTELLA 7

The Centre Civic Can Basté is showing La vida secreta de las palabras (Spain, 2005) by Isabel Coixet for free at 19:00h. Serious cinema awaits you at the Institut Francès with the documentary Ana Celia (Colombia, 2006) by Wilson Osorio. And this Nasty Monday Maxpunx & Sören (as always), DJ B80s and Facetic are all playing at Club Fellini.

Leo Stop being so fucking bossy! You’re piss-

TALK TO CANELA PUBLIC RELATIONS WE KNOW HOW TO MAKE NOISE

RAS @ DOCTOR DOU 10 // CAIXA FORUM @ AV. MARQUÈS DE COMILLAS 6-8 // SIDECAR @ PLAÇA REIAL 7

CENTRE CIVIC CAN BASTÉ @ PG FABRA I PUIG 274 // INSTITUT FRANCÈS @ CARRER MOIÀ 8 // FELLINI @ LA RAMBLA 27

monday/// sept 18

went into a jealous rage when her male booty call hooked up with a heterosexual female upon whom said lesbian had a crush. So typical of you pesky twins. How does this apply to you? I think you’ll already know. Sort it out.

NOBODY’S SEEN YOUR BRAND

the gallery and book shop in Raval, opened the exhibition Buy Me A Mercedes-Benz that breaks down the new museum space in Stuttgart designed and developed by UnStudio. The Caixa Forum is showing the film María llena eres de gracia (Maria Full Of Grace, 2003) by Joshua Marston at 19:30h and 22:00h for 2 Euros and the digital art exhibition MAD04 (with works by thirty young artists) is also opening at 20:00h with cocktails in the Espai 0. Musicwise: Sidecar has invited Go Lem System at 22:30h. The mestizaje of sounds from these 5 guys from Argentina are reminiscent of Manu Chao but feature más trip hop, dub and reggae rhythms. Entrance costs 5¤.

The agent provocateur and Italian comedian Leo Bassi returns to Barcelona with La Revelación (Club Capitol). Until November 5, Bassi will put on the robe of El Papa and explain the shortcomings and dangers of this mad mad world in his inimitable manner. Starts at 22:00h and costs 20 Euros. At the Llantiol Teatre the band CDC is playing mexican metal music a la fuerza y fuego in between the acoustic and electronic. Entrance costs 10 Euros. The atmosphere at the Big Bang Bar, where Roberta is hosting the weekly Big Bang Jam Session, is más tranquilo pero still divertido.

Gemini A lesbian Gemini friend of mine once

NOBODY’S HEARD OF YOU

continued

Sagittarius

Bjork sings a song about the unwritten nature of our lives—all that lies before us is ours to create,we are the authors of our own blank future. Do you know the song? What about the concept? It’s all yours, my PYT.You can change it all in a second.

capricorn

My neighbor, Isabel, mistreats her dog, Linda.They are both old. She screams at the dog and the dog barks back.They have arguments like this often. I saw Isabel the other day on the street picking up the Linda’s shit, resentfully. Be careful,you’re headed in the same direction.

Aquarius I like to wear knee-high socks, striped like Pippi Longstocking’s. I like to dye my hair primary colors. I like long red fingernails and fat red lips. I like for people to look at me. I know this about myself and I have fun with it. So,too, should you own your quirks; stop trying to be so unlike yourself.

Pisces Last week was tough,wasn’t it?

It was all celestial, so don’t feel as though it was your fault.You’re already feeling better and coming out of that gloom and doom. Getting out of the city could help you even more and getting out of your head is essential.

VOODOO1.qxd

reviews cuz we don’t do pre-views INTERNET RADIO

peeking into her box Anna-Maria Masci

I’ve always wanted to get into online music, but by the time I moved out of the Australian bush, record companies were declaring war against downloads, people were getting sued, and I got disheartened. There has always been online radio, but why bother when I’ve got my trusty transistor radio? Pandora.com is giving me some convincing reasons to drop the antenna and go for the cables. How does it work? You tell Pandora your favourite artist or song and Pandora creates a station by playing tunes with similar melodies, arrangements, tonality and instrumentation. These songs are chosen by both Pandora and other

3:25 PM

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VOODOO TATTOO Spanish and English Spoken All Custom Design c/ Sant Pau 30, Local 1 08001 BCN 93 301 93 53

WWW.PANDORA.COM BY

8/25/06

Pandora users. When you hear a track you like one click of the mouse will give you the artist’s biography and discography. It’s a music library sorted to your favourite flavours, and if a song happens to slip through that you’re not mad about, click the thumbs down and you’ll never hear it on your station again. And you will find new music. Pandora has a travelling crew who scout out local music all across America. Good, but not good enough. Why not have travelling crews checking out backyard garages across the world? If that happens, I may just throw out my transistor radio and buy a decent computer.

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email bart@bartypants.com to find out how to get your free tattoo

BOOK

the place to be no more PRAGUE /// ARTHUR PHILIPS

Michael Jones

The novel opens with five young expatriates whiling away a spring afternoon at a café in Budapest. It’s 1990, just after the fall of the iron curtain, and they are, decidedly, the voices of a very lost generation. This is no typical travelers’ tale of innocents abroad or vacations gone awry. Philips weaves a tale of depth and energy with historical tangents and simple descriptions that touch on the sublime. We follow our five very different characters (four Americans and one Canadian) on their search for their fortunes, inspiration, history in the making, and maybe even love. As they settle into guiri life, more and more tourists and expats mob the city, threatening to ruin the hip happening. The thought that perhaps Prague is the ideal place begins to loom over them, and here lies the novel’s intriguing underlying theme: in the author’s words, the novel is named not for the city but for an emotional disorder. Milan Kundera wrote a marvelous novel by the name of Life is Elsewhere (indecently set in Prague) that touches on the same idea: if only I were over there, or with her, or doing that, or had been born fifty years earlier, then I would be where the action is. For some expatriates living in Budapest at that moment, Prague felt like the place to be. Had those same people been in Prague, Budapest would have seemed like their paradise misplaced. And if people suffering from this dis-ease had actually made it to, say, Paris in the 1920s, they would have been disappointed that it didn’t feel like London in the 1880s. This is Arthur Phillips’ debut novel and his bio boasts such feats as having been a child actor, jazz musician, speechwriter, failed entrepreneur, and five time Jeopardy champion. Born in Minneapolis and educated at Harvard, he lived in Budapest from 19901992. He presently lives in Paris. BCN

Week

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new sangre MI NINA LOLA /// CONCHA BUIKA

Concha Buika is definitely the face of the new Afro-Spanish generation. Her parents are from New Guinea, she was born in Majorca, grew up among gypsies, has lived in the States and later on Madrid. Do you need more eclectic than that? She has a strong, melodic-soulful voice that will absolutely captivate you. So much depth, desperation and a cry for freedom. The Flamenco that she reinvents has a touch of jazz-funk, hiphop, soul and even salsa. Her second album, Mi Niña Lola, contains songs with her little magical touch. Written and composed by her, songs such as Jodida pero Contenta demonstrate her gypsy background, yet the lyrics are a wise anthem to overcome everything. Well-known musicians such as Niño Josele have collaborated with her in this work. This is an excellent album, a very rich mix of diverse sounds and cultures colliding.

Elliots Döttir

Buika has impressed me beyond my expectations. She played at the BFestival in late July, opening for Erykah Badu. You know that feeling you get when you go to a concert expecting to see some amateur Spanish opening band? Well, this wasn’t the case. After standing in line for a couple of hours with my fanshaped smile and almost having a heat stroke, I finally got in. I arrived to the medium-sized stage, right beside a huge banner that said in big bold letters “Opening Act: Buika.” I ask around: who is this Buika person? A Catalan kid replies “a girl from the south that sings flamenco…” I thought to myself: great just what I needed another I’m-so-sad-hear-me-clapflamenco in Olé-land, but much to my surprise, this was no ordinary flamenco. An hour later she was done, and it was a pity she wasn’t the main attraction.

BOOK

che che chroooooom! THE MOTORCYCLE DIARIES /// CHE GUEVARA B Y

NUBAA_NEW2.qxd

12/7/06

01:33

When Che Guevara was a young man and on his way to becoming a doctor, before he became an international symbol of rebellion for adolescents or a threat to the capitalist stronghold on foreign trade and economic affairs, before his remains were buried by a U.S. backed Bolivian death squad, he and a friend gathered a few things and took a trip across the continent. The Motorcycle Diaries is an eloquently written, autobiographical account of this journey through a land filled with the history of post-nomadic origins and European conquest as well as that of more recent conflicts between puppet governments and guerrilla coups. The mountainous and spirited regions of Chile and Peru traveled by Alberto Granado and Ernesto “Che” Guevara are described with fantastic imagery by the young doctor who would eventually become hardened and determined by the injustice he witnessed in his further exploration of the grand continent of South America. This book should be read by people that believe in the

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Alec Radford

propagandist opinion of Che as a ruthless, godless dictator who was determined to spread the red scare, as well as by those who yell “Viva la revolución!” and tote flags or t shirts sold to them by large companies making money off of a man who believed our capitalist society was in dire need of change. It should especially be read by the latter, because these people need to see that Che Guevara was not yelling “fuck you” at his teachers or “hijos de puta” at the local police. He was an extremely intelligent man, an author, a doctor and head of a national economy, as well as a guerrilla warrior and spokesman for the common worker. He believed that the people need to educate themselves in order to make any revolution successful. And, as most “rebels” of today that go around thinking revolution is made of cotton, chaos and angry music would probably rather watch television than read, there happens to be a movie of the book, starring Gael García Bernal.

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Week

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reality check BUBBLE /// STEVEN SODERBURGH

If you’ve ever wondered how a majority of Americans could elect Bush not once,but twice,go see Steven Soderburgh’s Bubble. This is middle America,painted in its bleakest terms:overworked,uninspired, stuffed with junk food,and isolated from adequate social interaction.A half hour into this minimalist,almost documentarystyle movie,it starts to seem less strange that many Americans can’t find Texas on a map,or have no idea what’s going on in the world.The lives of the three main characters are devoid of stimulation yet ruthlessly routinized,with job-related responsibilities occupying 95% of their waking hours.It’s no wonder that their coping mechanisms,including kleptomaniacaltendencies,the occasional joint,and a desperate internalization of anguish,don’t help much. This is a movie about sanity stretched as tight as a drum,about people trying to maintain a sense of normalcy under surreal conditions.They can’t allow

Núria Ferrer themselves to hope or to think outside the boundaries of their present lives,because any such thinking would make their own inevitable destiny intolerable. When a life is so interminably smallthat any alteration,however subtle,is an earthquake,everyone is a microstep away from crazy,a millimeter from crossing social boundaries. Soderburgh continues to be one of the ballsiest modern American filmmakers, with a willingness to carry out projects that don’t have proper box office appeal. Bubble was released simultaneously in theaters,on DVD,and over the Internet,and he chose his untrained actors from auditions carried out in the area where the project was filmed.The result has the feel of a home movie,making it an extraordinarily realistic short feature that will resonate with anyone who’s experienced an industrialtown.More importantly,it illuminates the fragility of living life at one’s breaking point.

Classifieds

our very own les encants

Personal classified ads are free. They may be 25 words max in length. Business classified ads are 5 cents a word. DEADLINE Friday at 12:00 noon, the week before publication. HOW TO SUBMIT Send it via email to classifieds@bcnweek.com, fax to +34 93 443 6659, or snail-mail to San Gil 2, bajos 2, 08001 Barcelona

Top 5 gigs of the Month BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE BLACK HORSE

1_ bananarama sept 10 2_ hot chip sepT 26

room apartment next to the market and subway. Tons of light. 700 ¤. Rafa 616 560 299.

sunny room Room for rent (Urquinaona) Nice bright, fully furnished room, exterior in a comfortable flat, situated in the center. Only 2 minutes from the Metro L1 y L4. 280¤/month all bills included. simon-sparks@excite.com

Hostal Santa Anna The friendly family-owned Hostal Santa Anna is practically on Las Ramblas. The quiet, clean and well maintained hostel has 18 simple rooms with views of the street or interior. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

3_ rapture sept 28 4_ virus sept 29 5_ mogwai sept 30

Poble Nou Beach Rooms

FOR SALE BOAT LIVING Can’t afford an apartment? Buy my boat and live on it in Torredembarra marina or move to Barcelona. Includes full domestic equipment. 49,000¤.contact: sywhitesaurel@hotmail.com

POPPY NEEDS A HOME Old bike with a lot of character seeks new owner, gets you from A to B if not with a few rattles and squeeks. 30¤ only. contact: francesca.hanson@yahoo.co.uk

Poble Nou Beach Rooms is a cosy place with lots of natural light in (where else) Poble Nou. A Barcelona classic, the apartment has original ceramic tiled floors. There are 3 bedrooms, each sleeping 2-3 perons. For short-term rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Crayon Box Apartment 3.1 The Crayon Box Apartment 3.1 is the beach lovers dream, a 40m2 recently renovated apartment right on the beach, sleeping up to 6 persons. For short-term rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Els Angels

FOR RENT ROOM with views Own bathroom. Sunny big house surronded by nature. Rustic garden. 2 living-rooms. Fitness room. Internet. Privacity. Sitges 10 min. 360¤. dragonina@telefonica.net 938 968 573

BUARDILLA Atic (buardilla) near Sitges. 85 m2. Well lighted. Private garden. Suitable for musicians, artists or proffesionals. 450 ? month or price to be agreed depending on use. dragonina@telefonica.net 938 968 573

quiet apartment Private Apartment — studio, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom — up to 3 persons. Raval — quiet, air conditioning. ZSR-BA@yahoo.de

APARTMENT TO RENT IN IBIZA. 5 km to the city, in the countryside, apartment capacity 4 people. Private garden and swmingpool. Car necesary. rainbowinspain.com or info@rainbowinspain.com

GAY AND GAYFRIENDLY ACCOMMODATION IN MAIN GAY DESTINATIONS IN SPAIN. Hotels and hostels in Barcelona, Madrid, Ibiza, Sitges, Gran Canaria, Tenerife. rainbowinspain.com or info@rainbowinspain.com.

BARCELONETA Very nice IKEA renovated 1 bed-

Small, cosy, 1-star, 10-rooms hostel with a familiar atmosphere located in L’Eixample district, 10 minutes on foot from Rambla Catalunya. The rooms are basic, well-lit and sunny, with kitchen access; some have a balcony overlooking the street, and others overlook the large courtyard. 24 hr reception and laundry service for 5¤. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Fina A basic 2 star hostel located in the very heart of the historical centre of Barcelona, at Portaferrissa, the most commercial street in the city. The hostel offers basic, clean, well conditioned rooms, where you will be able to relax and rest, as most of them are interior and very quiet. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Plaza This picturesque, 2-star, 20-room hostel is located between Passeig de Gràcia, Pl. Urquinaona and Pl. Catalunya, in the 1st floor of a modernist building. In the 1st floor, the hostel offers common areas, such as a bar serving drinks and breakfasts with plasma television, and a lounge with sofas and a quieter atmosphere inviting to read and relax. In addition, here is an Internet service for the clients. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hotel Travessera The Hotel Travessera 2 star hotel located right next to Gaudí’s lovely Parc Guell. Hotel Travessera has been recently refurbished and has

23 well-equipped rooms with en suite bathrooms, air conditioning, heating and TV. A good value, for reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Las Flores The Hostal Las Flores is a cosy family-run hostel located right on Las Ramblas. This quaint 1 star hostel is an economical choice, with 22 rooms on 4 floors. Almost all have access to a shared bathroom, except one double room which includes a private en suite bathroom and has a view of Las Ramblas. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Apartamento de la Paz The spacious 100m2 Apartamento La Paz has a 30m balcony stretching around the building and looks out over Las Ramblas and Port Vell. The apartamento can sleep up to 6 people, and is located on the first floor (no lift access) with lots of natural light. There are 3 double rooms, 1 with 2 single beds, 2 rooms with 1 double bed each. For holiday rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Ballestero A modest, well-maintained, 2-stars hostel of 26 rooms located near Meridiana Avenue, on the corner of Fabra i Puig Avenue, close to the commercial centre of Heron City. The hostel is situated in a 5-floor building with lift. Not especially charming, but it does offer clean, well-maintained rooms. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

BARCO Paula I Have an original experience on the Paula I sailboat (not a houseboat), or as we like to call it the “floating apartment,” located in the Port Vell. The boat can sleep up to 6 people, with 3 cabins with double beds. Watch the curious smiles of your friends when you tell them you’ve stayed on a 40 foot sailboat (not for sailing). Not many people will be able to say they spent their Barcelona vacation on a luxury boat! For short-term rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Crayon Box Apartment 2.1 The Crayon Box Apartment 2.1 is a 40m2 private apartment located on the beachfront of Barceloneta. This newly renovated apartment can sleep up to 4 people in 2 double rooms, one with a large double bed and another with bunk beds. A sofa bed sleeps one more, which is located in the living/dining room which also has a TV and balcony. The kitchen has all the amenities and there is also a full bathroom. The apartment is equipped with heating and air conditioning. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Boquería The Hostal Boqueria is a newly renovated hostel right on Las Ramblas, opposite the lively atmosphere of the Boquería. 15 neat and tidy rooms with TV, air conditioning,

heating and private bathrooms, this is a fairly standard hostel: 2 single beds and a sink in the room. Good value accommodation right in the centre of Barcelona. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hostal Lesseps A modest hostel placed in an old building with a beautiful entrance door, in the popular Gràcia district, an area full of live with a special charm, which still keeps its village atmosphere. It is located a 15 minutes walk to the famous Parc Güell and Passeig de Gràcia. The hostel offers simple, clean rooms; but do not expect a design decoration. However, all of them are equipped with a complete bathroom, and TV. There are double rooms with 1 double bed or 2 individual beds, and triple rooms, which are more spacious. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

BARCO Déjà vu Oceanis 36cc The Déjà vu is a gorgeous 36 foot (11 metres) cruising yacht moored in the marina Port Vell. A Jeanneau Oceanis 36cc, it was built in 2003 and waves the French flag. Outfitted in cherry wood, the boat is equipped with modern comforts, such as satellite TV, kitchen, full bathroom, towels and bed linens, and even slippers in case your feet get cold. Sleeps up to 4. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

you ask for a more central location? visit www.barcelona30.com for reservations.

Arc de Triomf Room Short-term rental in a double room for 1 or 2 persons with en suite private bathroom and TV in gorgeous shared apartment. apartment is right by Arc de Triomf metro station (line 1) and Renfe regional train station. Visit www.barcelona30.com.

Hotel Climent The 1 star Hotel Climent is located on the Gran Via in a 7 storey building with 5 rooms on each floor. The rooms are neat and clean, with minimal decor. They have an en suite bathroom, heating, TV and telephone. All rooms are exterior, with natural light, and are sufficiently soundproofed with windows with double paned glass to guarantee a good night’s sleep. The hotel is well-maintained and is wheelchair accessible. Breakfast included. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Pension Cortes Pension Cortes is a basic, clean hostel located in beautiful old building on Gran Via. Rooms are clean and cosy with single beds. Although the rooms overlook the street, it is relatively insulated from street noise. Metro station Urgell. For reservations, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Apartamento Picasso 32 Up to 5 of you can stay in the 50 m2 Picasso 32 Apartment smack in the middle of the historic and yet trendy district of Born. It has two bedrooms, one with a single bed and the other with two singles. The living/dining room has a TV and 2 sofas, one a sofa bed which sleeps two. The kitchen is fully-equipped, as is the bathroom. A small balcony gives a good photo-op of the gargoyles from the building in front, not something you wake up to every day. AC. For holiday rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

Levante Apartament M1 A recently renovated, 95m2 apartment with an excellent location, which can accommodate 4-8 persons. Located in the heart of the historic Barri Gòtic, it is a basic, cosy apartment, decorated with classical style wood furniture. It offers 3 bedrooms: one with 3 individual beds, one with a double bed, and the third with 2 individual beds. For short-term rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

WANTED ENGLISH TEACHERS Barcelona English Academy requires full time experienced teachers for 2006-07 course. TEFL qualification, experience with kids and enthusiasm essential. Spanish a great asset. Please send letter&CV to: nicama@tele2.es

bike needed Any type can be interesting. If it’s old and not damaged — perfect. If it’s a bit more modern, ok! But don’t want to pay more than 100¤. schwester_polyester@yahoo.com

TV DONATION I would like to get a — colour or black and white — TV donated for my room for the coming Winter to keep updated with the domestic and world news. Has someone got a spare one? I feel like in a shell when I learn the daily news. I would be very thankful. mineral_moon@yahoo.ca

Travessera Apartments

english classes

A private, welcoming apartment with daily cleaning service and towel/linen change located inside a 1-star hotel, next to Hospital Sant Pau. Sleeps up to 3 persons. For short-term rentals, visit www.barcelona30.com.

American English teacher looking for private students starting in July. 12¤/hour. Adaptable, responsible, creative. Serious inquiries only. hleben@gmail.com

Hostal Rembrandt Hostal Rembrandt is a clean, wellrun 28 room hostel in an unbeatable location on Portaferrisa. Can

Week BCN

P R O D U C TO S get your guiri fix at

www.bcnweek.com

children playground Looking for, or to start a playgroup for children in Diagonal Mar/Villa Olimpica area. English, Russian, and Spanish speaking. Interested email: keyian@hotmail.co.uk.

AND SERVICES LEARN ABOUT HOMEOPATHY Learn simple and effective ways to treat colds and flu, childhood ailments, accidents and injuries, strained muscles, jet lag and a wide range of everyday complaints. Friendly course in the heart of the city. Learn about the history and philosophy of homeopathy, how the remedies work and how to use them for yourself, your friends and family. Course runs once a week for 4 weeks. Course fee 80 euros. Next course starts 19th September at 7pm. Zoe 645257791. zoeeholden@yahoo.com. Homeopathic treatment also available.

Spanish classes Qualified teacher. Best references. Private or 4 people groups. All levels. Also business Spanish. María dragonina@telefonica.net 938 968 573

Classes of Russian From an experienced teacher and translator from Moscow for highly-

motivated english—speaking people. Contact: arsbrush@yahoo.com

VAN AND DRIVER FOR REMOVALS AND CARGO TRANSPORTATION Inexpensive, safe and flexible. Any day, any time. Barcelona / Catalunya. 647533344 / 933291363 www.vanbcn.com

MASSAGE EXCHANGE Seeking to start a small group of people doing bodywork at any level and willing to exchange sessions for the joy of it. I do Hawaian Lomi Lomi, Ayurvedic Yoga, Reiki and Metamorphic massage. galileanin@gmail.com

tarot reader TAROT, international clairvoyant... DAVID. clairvoyant, tarot cards, psychic, crystal ball, palm readings, david has the true gift of reading your future. David at 678378802

FOOTBALL LEAGUE New 11-a-side football team starting in the Barcelona International League. Interested in playing each Saturday? All nationalities welcome. Email uws@dial.pipex.com

I SAW YOU Did u see someone you like? Too shy to say it to their face? Then BCN WEEK’s ‘I SAW YOU’ is for you! Be sure to tell us who you are and what you saw when? where? why? email or contact detail required. GIVE IT BACK Okay, when I called you a selfcentered, childish, spoiled bastard (in the literal sense of the word) I might have been overstepping my bounds a teensy bit. Still that’s no reason to keep my John Mellencamp CD. Give it back. straypuppy@gmx.de

I CAN’T DANCE I see you in the gazebo during tango class at Ciutadella Park. You’re the only one without a partner. I like your red shoes. I can’t dance, but I can drink coffee. How about you? T2anno505000@yahoo.com

DREADLOCKS Damn girl, I’m not usually into dreadlocks but I wouldn’t mind being wrapped up in those! That night on the beach was amazing!! Meet me at the Absenta Bar next Sunday at 8 and get ready to make beautiful music together. toocoolo@hotmail.com

FRENCHIE You: some crazy Frenchie with dark, curly hair who lives by the some train station. I don’t remember cuz I was drunk. Me: American who you seemed to enjoy. Hit me: matblack@mac.com

ENAMORADA Eres el colombiano mas hermoso del mundo y soy la palida irlandesa quien esta enamorada de ti. Te veo dibujando en el parque. Eres artista? Podrias ser. Eres el ladron de mi corazon? Claro. smallgreyflower@hotmail.com

BALD I’m sorry I cut your hair when you passed out. No wait… I’m really not. You never would have noticed if I hadn’t told you. The question is: Have I done it since? Anitapancita@yahoo.com

AFTER THE FALL I saw you fall off your bike when you were riding near the Colon statue this Saturday at about 3:30am. Luckily you were too drunk to mind. I respect that. I liked your look before and after the fall. Wanna tryanother ride? Tuff_girl@hotmail.com

yellow ramonete You had a big yellow handbag and long black hair at Pl Universitat. Do you really like the Ramones? I’d like to talk to you. speet@hotmail.com

BCN

Week

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