Oregon Family Magazine by Oregon Family Magazine

Our Contributors

1. ASHLEY BECKETT

Ashley Beckett is the Community Relations Director for Fox Hollow Residential Care. She is responsible for bridging Fox Hollow with families and advocates, facilitates the move-in process with other members of the management team, and works with care partners toward the common goal of our aging population’s best interest. Prior to joining Fox Hollow, Ashley was an Administrator specializing in Alzheimer’s/ dementia. In her free time, she enjoys hiking, trail running, visiting the library with her two daughters, baking, reading, and finding new adventures through food and travel.

2. RICK EPSTEIN

A Dad’s Eye View contributor, also award-winning columnist, and journalist. Author of Rookie Dad (Hyperion) and The Right Number of Kids (McKenna Publishing Group). His wife and three daughters run a living laboratory in which he is constantly tested, analyzed, and experimented upon. It’s as if a guinea pig could write.

3. TANNI HAAS

Tanni HaasPh.D. is a Professor in the Department of Communication Arts, Sciences, and Disorders at The City University of New York – Brooklyn College.

4. BONNIE HARRIS

Bonnie is Oregon Family Magazine’s resident Movie Review Master Extraordinaire. She enjoys watching movies of all kinds, and has been doing movie reviews for over 9 years and counting. She lives in Eugene with her family, enjoys gardening and cooking.

Journalist and photographer specializing in environmental issues, the outdoors and travel. When he is not out in the field taking pictures, Roddy runs EarthTalk, the non-profit Publisher of the syndicated EarthTalk Q&A column and the EarthTalk.org and Emagazine 2 3 1 4 5 6 7

5. CHRISTA MELNYK HINES

Christa Melnyk Hines is an award-winning writer whose articles appear in publications across the U.S. and Canada. She is the mom of two techy teenage sons and a quirky shepherd mix. Connect with her at www.christamhines.com.

6. PAM MOLNAR

Pam Molnar is a writer, storyteller and mother of three. She enjoys writing about moments and events that bring people together. When she is not writing, Pam creates escape room kits and PowerPoint games which she sells in her Etsy shop, Pam’s Party Printables.

7. BETH STEIN

Beth Stein is the Executive Director of Nearby Nature, a non-profit nature education group in Eugene, Oregon. At Nearby Nature’s home base in Alton Baker Park she might be found teaching classes, training volunteers, telling stories, writing newsletters, managing finances, or even occasionally hopping around in a Frannie Frog costume! Beth has a B.A. in English Literature and a minor in Environmental Studies from Williams College. She lives in Eugene with her husband and cat Batman.

8. RODDY SCHEER

Oregon Family Magazine is distributed monthly in the greater Lane County area at over 150 high-traffic commercial locations.

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What is Jimmy Carter’s environmental legacy?

— B.N.., ATHENS, GA

JIMMY CARTER, THE 39th U.S. President, made a lasting impact on environmental policy. His robust initiatives to protect natural resources and advance clean energy established the foundation for environmental policy in subsequent decades. Despite obstacles, his efforts in land preservation, energy efficiency and climate activism still impact environmental policy in the present day.

One of Carter’s most significant actions, a symbolic one, was installing solar panels on the White House. And he signed the National Energy Act, which reduced U.S. dependence on foreign oil and encouraged the use of alternative energy sources. “The energy crisis is real. It is worldwide. It is a clear and present danger…” Carter stated during his presidency, emphasizing the urgency of moving to sustainable energy. Carter also created the Department of Energy in 1977 to consolidate management and energy policy. The move displayed his foresight in

addressing energy security and climate issues. This laid out the groundwork for the renewable energy sector’s growth in subsequent decades.

protected priceless ecosystems for future generations. Reinforcing existing environmental codification was another order for Carter. He

environmental and social justice. “Habitat has successfully removed the stigma of charity by substituting it with a sense of partnership,” Carter voiced. Carter’s environmental vision faced difficulties. Economic struggles limited the scope of some initiatives. Additionally, President Reagan removed the White House solar panels, indicating a retreat from Carter’s vision. But his cutting-edge advocacy inspired subsequent efforts on climate change and conservation.

Carter’s dedication to conservation was equally effective. His administration included multiple wildlife reserves, national parks and public lands in the federal portfolio. Specifically, he enacted the Alaska National Interest Lands Conservation Act in 1980, which protected over 100 million acres of Alaska wilderness, enlarged the National Park System and

reinforced the Clean Air and Clean Water Acts, and in 1980, signed the Superfund law to clean up hazardous waste sites. After leaving office, Carter continued to work for the environment. Through the Carter Center, he promoted sustainable farming and clean energy. His work with Habitat for Humanity promoted affordable and sustainable housing as a foundation of

Jimmy Carter’s environmental legacy serves as a reminder that fearlessness and longterm vision are important in addressing today’s ecological challenges. His leadership continues to inspire. Ultimately, his efforts underscore the mutuality of protecting the environment, sustainable development, and social justice. ✦

CONTACTS: https://www.cartercenter.org/ https://www.jimmycarterlibrary.gov/

EarthTalk® is produced by Roddy Scheer & Doug Moss for the 501(c)3 nonprofit EarthTalk. See more at https://emagazine.com To donate, visit https://earthtalk.org. Send questions to: question@earthtalk.org

Jimmy Carter is famous for installing solar panels on the White House and shepherding the nation through the oil crises of the 1970s.

Young Love

NAVIGATING TEEN RELATIONSHIPS

BY TANNI HAAS, PH.D.

Teens will be teens. And part of being a teen means developing crushes. Help your teen understand how to interact responsibly during these challenging times, as they’re developing and maturing…

arents are not generally comfortable with the idea of their teen dating; but it’s a fact of life, and better for everyone involved when it’s acknowledged and accepted, rather than denied. As behavioral psychologist Dr. Shane Owens says, “dating is a rite of passage for kids – and for their parents.” So, what should parents do and say if their teen reveal they’ve started dating? Here’s what our experts suggest:

LISTEN CAREFULLY –AND DON’T LECTURE

You should feel flattered if your teen tells you that they’re dating. It’s a sign they trust you and are excited to share the news with you. “Kids don’t confide in their parents as much as they get older,” says Rachel Ehmke of the Child Mind Institute, “so when kids do feel like talking, really make an effort to be available and listen.” Listen carefully to what they say and try to react in a non-judgmental way. Avoid lecturing them, because if you do, says clinical psychologist Lisa Tiano, “they’ll tune you out, or give you the occasional eye roll, waiting for the lecture to be done and over with.”

TALK ABOUT WHAT GOOD RELATIONSHIPS ARE LIKE

Use the occasion to talk about what good relationships are like. Middle school counselor Phyllis Fagell suggests parents discuss relationship characteristics like dependability, empathy, generosity, kindness, and considering someone else’s perspective. Ms. Fagell adds that parents can also recount their own experiences: “Talk about how you fell in love with your partner.” “What qualities did you admire?” and be honest, even if it wasn’t a perfect experience.

TALK ABOUT RESOLVING CONFLICTS

Explain to your teen that conflicts are inevitable even in the best relationships. Encourage them to deal with conflicts instead of ignoring them. Help your teen understand, Ms. Ehmke says, that “it’s much better to admit when something is wrong, talk about it together, and try to fix it together.” It will better prepare them well for what it’s like to be in a mature, adult relationship in the future. Clinical Psychologist Dr. Jose Delerme adds that parents should teach their teens that arguments aren’t about winning or losing: “shift the idea of control to compromise, because no relationship should be one-sided.”

ENCOURAGE THEM TO KEEP THEIR FRIENDS AND INTERESTS

Remind your teen how important it is for them to have their own interests that are separate from their boyfriend or girlfriend. Dr. Delerme encourages parents to explain that “relationships should complement your life – not define it.” Also encourage them not to ditch their regular friends just because they’re in a relationship. Explain, Ms. Ehmke says, that “no one wants a friend who will throw her over for someone else, and you still need a social life outside your boyfriend or girlfriend.”

OFFER PERSPECTIVE

Anyone who’s been in love knows the feeling can be all-consuming. Your teen may feel their current partner, especially if it’s the first one, will be their one and only everlasting love. As parents, we know better, but should fight the temptation to minimize the relationship or make it bigger than it really is. Well-known lifestyle writer Dina Cheney puts it well: “When your child reveals a crush for the first time, it’s easy to accidentally make fun of it, but you should resist the urge to trivialize things.” But, she says, parents shouldn’t aggrandize it either: “asking your son or daughter if they’re going to marry the person, for example, would apply too much pressure.”

GET TO KNOW THE PARTNER

Invite the boyfriend or girlfriend over to the house. It shows them that you’re comfortable with the idea of them being in a relationship, and that you care. If your teen thinks you genuinely want to get to know their romantic partners, says Amanda Morin, senior expert at Understood, an education think tank, “they’re more likely to open up to you – and possibly, less likely to engage in questionable behavior.”

WHEN TO INTERVENE

One of the toughest questions is when parents should intervene in their teens’ relationships, possibly to end them. Experts agree that parents should do so if either of the kids aren’t treating the other well. “If you overhear your teen saying mean comments or using manipulative tactics,” says Ms. Morin, “speak up. Similarly, if your teen is on the receiving end of unhealthy behavior, it’s important to step in and help.”

Navigating these first relationships is an important life process, and can be exciting, confusing, fun, and sometimes even challenging. Be there for your kids – on the periphery and enjoy this snap shot in time! ✦

Assisted Living

AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY

BY ASHLEY BECKETT

AsCHILDREN, MANY OF us view our parents as paragons of strength; we crawl into bed with them when there’s a storm, because they take the power out of thunder. We ask for permissions, because they’ve lived long enough to know better. We cry to them when we are feeling low because their kisses and hugs are a special brand of magic. And when looking at the lines on their faces we know they have lived hundreds of lives before us.

When we grow up, we’ve attuned to the storms and the pains of life, and we learn to mostly make the right decisions. But our

parents remain immovable in love. As a son or daughter, we want to honor all the love it took to build us, as their children. We also want to honor the lines set between their brows, and on their cheeks. We helped build their character as their children, but how do we build this as they age?

For many sons and daughters, part of our own aging process includes slowly bearing witness to our parent’s vulnerabilities; their knees won’t allow them to be the avid gardener they once were, the doctor’s appointments seem to be stacking up, and they remember when it was easier to recall an old stew recipe by heart. With these vulnerabilities comes the helplessness of wanting to be there, but not knowing how. And when vulnerabilities start to turn into the inability to care for oneself, we find ourselves in a role reversal we never saw coming, which includes organizing pill boxes, doing laundry, and ensuring our parents eat often make the checklist. For a few it is manageable, but for many it is not.

Life can suddenly be consumed by

realizing mom forgot to take her heart medication, or hugging dad and noticing weight loss, or wondering if they remembered to lock the door and turn off the stove. It can be leaving your home to stay the night, to make sure they don’t fall. It might be reminding them of appointments, where you are taking time off work to transport them. In other words, it becomes a whole other life a child lives to parent their parent. This can be sustainable depending on workload, responsibilities, income, and energy, but eventually one or more of those things gives way. Often, a levee breaks, and desperation gives way to a search for solution.

There’s also a certain degree of guilt in handing off responsibility to care for your parents; often just as heavy as the guilt felt when thinking you should continue to care for them, but knowing you cannot. These are our parents! They grew us! When we raise a human there are so many ways to view at it, whether young or old. Raise, by definition, is “to lift”. We cannot lift when we are tired. And when we are tired, we need

to rest. Leave the guilt behind. You have permission to cross back over a line you never knew you crossed, which divided a daughter and caregiver. Good, assisted living isn’t an island, it’s a village. A good, assisted living community knows the whole family enters the community, if they choose. Good, assisted living means assistance for everyone. Embrace the process as a family entity, with the community as a partner, and step through the journey together. ✦

TIPS FOR EXPLORING ASSISTED LIVING

1. If your parents are open to exploring this option, know this is a big step for them. Talk about what is most important to them when deciding on a community. Do your best to honor their wishes.

2. Talk to caregivers, staff, management team, and other residents if possible.

3. Most places offer a lunch tour. This is a great opportunity to explore the quality of food!

4. Pop in on facilities you are considering.

5. Beware the overshare. You don’t need to be sold. The person you are meeting with should be curious about your loved one.

6. Pick the three most important aspects and stick to those. You can try to get to as perfect as possible, but it’s never going to be 100%.

Electronics Recycling Competition January - April, 2025

Donate unwanted, unused, or broken electronics to your student’s Lane County-based school!

Schools that recycle the most “e-waste” will win grants of up to $500 to support school sustainability, a NextStep Reuse Store computer gift certificate & special recognition!

7. Find someone who will walk you through the process. A good community relations director should be able to give you a road map of what you should anticipate.

8. Ask around. Others may have experience with this thing. Word of mouth is important.

9. Be realistic. The first 30 days, particularly the first week will be an adjustment period. Pick a community that you know will communicate well and promptly.

10. Take your time, if you can. Explore ahead of time. If you haven’t had the talk with your parent yet, they are going to have a lot of questions. Having answers means you were thoughtful and diligent.

wastewiselane.org/ERC Contact us to schedule a tour, or with any questions you may have.

Happily Ever After...

BY PAM MOLNAR

A tSOME TIME IN OUR LIVES, many of us have met Bridezilla. She is the bride who demands perfection, issues unreasonable requests and expects the wedding guests to focus on her and her selections. I often wonder how that selfish bride and her new husband are going to make it past the honeymoon. Seasoned couples will tell you that planning the wedding and having it all come together is the easy part. The real work comes in trying to navigate the journey of life as a married

couple. While we all get stuck along the way, these tips will get us back on the road to living happily ever after.

Be in the moment. Today, it is easy to unintentionally ignore the people around us by escaping into the digital world. Limit your use of phones and computers when you are with your family.

Listen more, talk less. Instead of jumping in with the events of your day, ask him about his meeting, the upcoming merger or his new boss. Sometimes, men like to vent, too.

Say, “I love you” every time you leave. We never know what fate has in store.

Continue to dream together. Your dreams may be postponed while your kids are small, but that doesn’t mean they are gone. Talk about them, do research and keep that fire burning until it becomes a reality.

Have your own interests. While part of a couple, it is important to remain an individual. Make time to do the things you enjoy and support your husband when he does the same.

Let the little stuff go. Does it really matter how the dishwasher is loaded or if the tools are put in the wrong spot on the peg board? Choose peace over being perfect.

Show gratitude. We all work hard at our day job, whether we are taking home a paycheck or not. We often forget our partner in parenting is working hard on their end, too. A simple, “I couldn’t do it without you” goes a long way.

Don’t wait to celebrate. Open a good bottle of wine when you complete a big project. Buy a new outfit when you lose five pounds. Applaud the moments as well as the milestones.

Schedule a regular date night and don’t cancel it. Your time alone together is just as important as a work function or a friend’s 40th birthday party.

Keep fit. Being married and having a family is not an excuse to let yourself go. Make healthy choices, exercise daily and visit your doctor regularly.

Fight fair. Don’t bring up past fights. Leave the family and friends out of it. Stick to the issue at hand and resolve it. If you can’t do it on your own, get professional help.

Talk about money, even when it is tight. Hiding money problems or ignoring them won’t make them go away. Get it out in the open and tackle it together instead of waiting until it’s out of control.

Make sex a priority. Yes, you may be tired from work, kids and everyday life, but a marriage needs intimacy. Put down the computer, set the DVR and put the kids to bed early. You will be glad you did.

Say what is on your mind. While you don’t want to complain about every little thing, don’t ignore your feelings to spare his. Find a non-confrontational way to voice your concerns.

Act silly. Dance around the room, have a pillow fight, or chase each other with the threat of an ice cube down the back. Let your kids see you laughing together.

Connect throughout the day. Kiss hello and goodbye. Share the high points as your day moves forward with a call or text. If traveling, check in using Facetime or Skype after a long day away from each other.

Admire your man. Let him know how good he looks in that new shirt. Praise him for a job well done fixing the sink. Watch him playing with your children and tell him how lucky the kids are to have such a great dad.

And lastly, apologize when you are wrong. It’s as simple as that. ✦

Movie Night

Fur vs. Feathers

BY BONNIE L. HARRIS

ALTHOUGH IT’S A comforting return to the frivolous fun of all the Wallace & Gromit claymation movies and short features, Vengeance Most Fowl runs a close third after Pirates (2012) and the incomparable Chicken Run (1997) both produced by Aardman Animation. British humor and sight jokes fill

VENGEANCE MOST FOWL

Aardman Animation, Rated: PG

Streaming on Netflix

every scene and the action is fairly fast-paced with lots of colorful characters for younger viewers. However predictable the story seems, there were a couple of unexpected twists & turns to keep the narrative lively and energetic. As always, the endearing canine Gromit stays two steps ahead of his wacky owner, Wallace, and three steps ahead of total disaster. Vengeance Most Fowl harkens back to the movie The Wrong Trousers with villain Feathers McGraw reappearing as Wallace’s nemesis. This evil penguin’s plot to steal the priceless Blue

Diamond was foiled by Wallace and now he’s back to finish the job. After Wallace invents a mini robot named Norbot to help around the garden, and eventually hires him out to the neighbors, Feathers McGraw sees an opportunity to secretly reprogram Norbot to help him escape from prison and steal the diamond. It’s not until Gromit finds himself locked in a garden shed that he begins to suspect that Norbot is up to no good. Add a bumbling police chief and his eager recruit to the mix of

FOR the PARENTS

Burden to be Better

THE SIX TRIPLE EIGHT

Tyler Perry Studios, Rated: PG-13 Streaming on Netflix

I’D HEARD SOME pretty good things about Tyler Perry’s feature The Six Triple Eight, the story of the all-female battalion of AfricanAmerican women in WWII tasked with delivering the mail overseas. Although it has a terrific story and a fairly strong cast, the movie wandered astray several times and often lost sight of its purpose. The racial oppression and injustice in this period, especially in the armed forces, goes without saying, but Perry directs with an overly heavy hand and the dialogue gets a little preachy. As interesting as it was to watch these brave women train and prepare for their mission, then face the insurmountable obstacles trying to figure out how to deliver 18 million letters and packages in less than six months, I expected more of an emotional sha-bang from the ending. Instead, Perry adds documentary interviews, actual footage, and a coda with Michelle Obama. While related, it’s a bit of a let down when what we really

Women’s Army Corps.

stolen garden equipment and an army of Norbots that eventually leads to an all out chase to recapture Feathers McGraw. But the diamond isn’t where everyone thinks it is, Wallace isn’t the criminal everyone believes he is, and Gromit isn’t as close to death as it seems he is! The thrilling chase to capture Feathers McGraw involves some hairraising double crossing before Gromit finally saves the day. Pop some popcorn and enjoy the goofy mayhem knowing that all’s well that ends well. ✦

want to know is the true story of how the 6888 Battalion actually got the job done before their deadline. Like the saying goes: If you want something said, ask a man. When you want something done, ask a woman.

Wacky inventions go haywire.

LOOKING FOR A NEW CONNECTION?

Try Nature Nearby!

BY BETH STEIN

FEELING A LITTLE LONELY OR SAD THESE DAYS?

Wishing you had a new friend who was available anytime, day or night? Someone who didn’t care how old you were, what language you spoke, what color you were, or how many other friends you had? Someone who could sing all sorts of cool songs, create beautiful art, and make great snacks?

If this is you, then look no further… than outside your front door! No matter who you are, nature nearby has been waiting to connect with you as a friend since the day you were born, in natural areas and parks right in your own community. And indeed, as we move into our Willamette Valley spring, those songs, art, and snacks that nature

serves up daily will soon be available! Birds will be singing, a rainbow of flowers will bloom, and even berries will start to ripen. When you develop a personal connection with nature, just like when you spend time with a friend, both your mental and physical health improve. And the same is true for kids, many of whom are suffering from significant stress and poor health these days. As a grown-up, you can connect with nature on your own, but the kids in our community may need your help. Here are a few ideas to get your started.

PARENTS

Make regular nature adventures and signing up for outdoor camps and activities a priority for your family. But don’t stop there. Reach out to your child’s classmates. Is there a friend at school who doesn’t get outside often? Maybe their parents work on weekends… or their family doesn’t own bicycles. Make room for an extra passenger next time you drive to Spencer Butte for a hike. Loan out a bicycle so a friend can come along on your next ride by the Willamette River. Or take your child and a friend to a family-friendly outdoor event sponsored by Nearby Nature, the Cascades Raptor Center, Mount Pisgah Arboretum, or WREN.

NEIGHBORS

If you live next to a family that doesn’t have a nice outdoor play space, offer to share your yard. Make your neighbor’s children a box of cones, stones, and shells for fairy-house building, create a minisandbox in a plastic tub, or a designate a spot in your garden where they can plant their own seeds or dig in the dirt.

DAYCARE PROVIDERS

Make exploring outside your facility a part of your regular routine, just like morning circle or afternoon snack. Take a daily walk around the block or visit a nearby park. Watch squirrels, smell flowers, listen to birds, and pick berries. Venture further as you feel more comfortable with your students. Keep up your routine all year round, rain or shine.

BABYSITTERS

Ask the family you work for to provide weather-hardy clothes, coats, and boots for your young charges. Spend time outside in the yard or at nearby parks. Build forts, jump in puddles, and make mud pies!

MENTORS

If you are a youth mentor, make establishing a relationship with nature a regular part of the time you spend with your young friend. Go on outdoor adventures that your youth can do on their own again later. Hike up Skinner Butte, explore the riverside in Alton Baker Park, or go bird watching in the wetlands behind Valley River Center.

TEACHERS

Do everything you can to extend your classroom boundaries beyond its four walls. At school, plan playground or school garden science projects. Have reading groups meet outside. Set up a window-visible bird feeder. Schedule outdoor field trips with groups like Nearby Nature, Mount Pisgah Arboretum, or WREN.

Finally, remember that friendship is a two-way street. Be sure to treat your new friend, nature nearby, with abundant kindness and respect. Protect the creatures that make homes in community trees, waterways, and meadows. Leave no trace when you bike by rivers and walk through woodlands. Join in park clean-ups and caretaking projects. And introduce nature nearby to others! The more friends the merrier! ✦

BE MINE

10 Ways to Say “I Love You!”

A VALENTINE’S DAY FAMILY PLAYBOOK

BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES

Valentine’s Day isn’t just for couples in the heady throes of young love. Deliver sweet somethings to every important person in your life. Here’s the plan for a perfectly playful V-Day for the whole family.

1 CREATE A SWEET TWEETS JAR. Decorate a mason jar for your child. On slips of paper, write adjectives or short sentences in 280 characters or less that describe traits you most appreciate, admire and love about him or her.

2 HUNT FOR CUPID’S TREASURE. Challenge your kids to a scavenger hunt. Give them clues on a trail of paper hearts or cupid cut-outs. One clue leads to the next until they find a Valentine’s Day surprise. Check online for scavenger hunt clue ideas.

“ATTACK” THEM WITH HEARTS. On each of the thirteen days leading up to Valentine’s Day, mom of four, Alexis Sanchez

posts a heart-shaped note on her kids’ doors each night after they go to bed. By Valentine’s Day, their doors are covered. “Usually it’s just characteristics I see in them or ways that they’re kind to others. They really love this, and I even found my eight year old kept all his hearts from last year in a special drawer so that’s pretty awesome,” Sanchez says, whose other children are 10, 6 and 1.

4 SEND A SINGING TELEGRAM. Video your preschooler singing a ditty like: “I made this little valentine; Of red, white and blue; I made this little valentine; Especially for you!” (point at the camera). Email the file to grandparents or another relative your youngster is crazy about.

5 CUSTOMIZE CARDS FOR CLASSMATES. Bypass the usual cartoon paper postcards and publish simple photo cards with a themed border. Last year, Sanchez attached a small bottle of bubbles to her daughter’s cards, which read “Friend, you blow me away!”

PLAY THE QUEEN OF HEARTS. Ace V-Day by sending love notes in a pack of red playing cards for your beloved. Punch holes in the corner of each card. On paper squares, write down 52 reasons why you love or appreciate him. Paste each sentiment in the middle of a playing card. Title the deck “I love you because...” and paste it on the top card. Attach the cards with a c-clip.

7 TREAT THEM TO A HEARTY BREAKFAST. Surprise your kids with heart-shaped cinnamon rolls. Instead of rolling your cinnamon roll dough from one side to the other, roll it on both sides so that each side meets in the middle forming a heart shape. Slice and bake. Serve juice out of dollar store champagne flutes. Make a fruit salad. Cut fruits like apples, strawberries, banana and watermelon using a heart-shaped cookie cutter.

8 TOY WITH CHEMISTRY. Put candy conversation hearts to the test. Gather vinegar, salt water, tap water and bleach (with adult guidance). Place a candy heart in four bowls. Ask your child to hypothesize about what will happen when each liquid is dropped over the candy. Using an eye dropper, test her theory. How does the candy react to different liquids? Did your young chemist’s predictions prove true?

9 GET THOSE HEARTS PUMPING. Using a poster board, make a grid of nine different exercises (sit-ups, somersaults, jumping jacks, pushups, etc). Players take turns tossing a beanbag (or other item) onto the grid. Then they rolling the dice to see how many times they have to do the exercise that their beanbag landed on. For more ideas, check out 12345 Fit-Tastic! on Pinterest, a healthy lifestyles initiative for families.

10 REV UP DATE NIGHT. In the whirlwind of parenting, life as a couple can get routine. Plan an outing with your sweetheart that’s playful and gets you out of your dinner-and-a-movie rut. For example, lift off in a hot air balloon ride; go dancing; take a couples cooking class; paint together at a drop-in paint-and-sip studio; or attend a concert or live theater production. ✦

A Dad’s Eye View

Dad Knows the Way Boys Are

BY RICK EPSTEIN

IN THE OLD MOVIE

“Clueless,” the daughter’s date arrives to pick her up, and her dad glowers at him and says, “I’ve got a .45 and a shovel, and I don’t think anybody’d miss you.” This Valentine’s Day, while young love brightens the landscape like the forest fire in “Bambi,” I plan to seek comfort by re-watching “Clueless” just to hear a fellow father of a teenage daughter express himself so nicely.

When I was young, I used to envy the fathers of the girls I pined for. As fat, bald and terminally uncool as those dads usually were, they got to live under the same roof as my dream girls, breakfasting with them, dining with them, and even receiving daughterly hugs on special occasions. All because of a difficult-to-picture biological event that happened more than 12 to 20 years previous. It didn’t seem fair. Even so, I liked to think we were on the same team – both of us were guys who adored the same teenage girl. Now I understand our respective missions a little better.

My oldest daughter Marie turned 13 in December. And last week, a boy showed up to take her to the middle school dance. The school is about 1,000 feet away from our house, so it wasn’t much of a haul. But when you’re traveling into a new dimension, the old notions of distance don’t mean much. A daughter at a dance in the school gym is not awfully far away, but she’d be easier to rescue if Darth Vader

had her chained up in a distant galaxy.

The Boy made the abduction while I was still at work, so I didn’t have to decide whether to radiate menace to earn his respect or simulate welcome to keep him where I can watch him.

I’ve tried to prepare Marie and her younger sisters for dealings with boys. “Did you know,” I said one night over dinner, “that whenever there are no girls or grownups around, boys drop down onto all fours and run around like dogs?”

“Yes, Dad,” Marie said wearily, “You’ve said that a thousand times.”

“Oh, Dad!” said 9-year-old Sally with amused tolerance.

“Do they REALLY?!” asked 6-year-old Wendy.

“Sure,” I said, “Haven’t you ever noticed how their pants wear out at the knee? And it’s not just boys. Men are the same way. When you see a bunch of them clustered together, they don’t just talk about sports and mortgage rates.”

“Well, what about you, Dad?” Marie asked. “You’re not like that.”

“Sure I am. I’m one of the better ones though; I at least PRETEND to be a human being for days at a time,” I explained. “And sometimes a guy like me is the best you can do. Ask Mom.”

Another time I told Marie about “Girl Talk,” the game my teenage friends and I used to play while we were supposed to be sleeping on my pal Tommy’s screened-in porch. We’d slowly run through the

entire roster of the girls we all knew, alphabetically from Abbie to Zenobia, sharing opinions, making observations and describing encounters. All testimony was detailed and unhurried. If the investigation of Kennedy’s assassination had been half as thorough, there would be no superfluous theories today. The only virtue we recognized was explicit candor. Sometimes Girl Talk would get us so stirred up, we’d sneak out and continue the game while roaming the streets, strolling past the homes of some of the very same girls under discussion.

“Couldn’t ANY of you keep a secret?” Marie asked.

“It never occurred to us. We

the idea. “No, I won it in a Twist contest.”

“So... you went with Jim,” I said. “You and him getting to be an item?”

“I don’t know,” she said.

“Want to watch some TV?” I asked.

“Sure,” she said.

I put “Back to the Future” into the DVD player, and Marie doffed her silly hat. We snuggled together on the couch like we used to when she was 3 and Bart Simpson was her favorite actor. I had lots to say that couldn’t be said, and there was lots I wanted to know that I was not going to find out.

The Boy was out there somewhere. Maybe he was at home tossing and turning on his

A HEALTHFUL DESSERT

BY WILLOW LAWSON

Chocolate for Life C

LICHÉD AS IT IS, MAYBE THAT BOX OF Valentine’s Day chocolates wasn’t such a bad idea.

In recent years, studies have absolved chocolate from causing acne, cavities and high cholesterol levels. But a new study goes even further, proving that chocolate may be one of the most functional foods out there, even a great brain saver. Of course, you don’t need any persuading that it’s probably the most delicious as well.

Chocolate turns out to be a good source of antioxidants - those beloved chemicals known for their cell-protecting properties. Antioxidants scavenge and fight off free radicals, wildly reactive rogue molecules of oxygen that damage cell membranes and the DNA, which contains the cells basic operating instructions. Free radicals aid and abet heart disease by oxidizing the “bad” (LDL) cholesterol, leading to hardened arteries. Free radicals are also linked to cancer and degenerative diseases in all parts of the body.

The battle between antioxidants and free radicals takes

place at the most basic level in our bodies. Free radicals have an odd number of electrons, which makes them unstable; they steal electrons wherever they can find them. Antioxidants have the ability to donate an electron, neutralizing free radicals without becoming free radicals themselves.

The brain is particularly susceptible to free radical damage because it is exposed to a large amount of oxygen; as the body’s most metabolically active organ, it consumes about 20% of the body’s oxygen, although it totals only 2% of our body weight. Free radicals enter our bodies through pollution, fried food and even just normal metabolic processes of the body.

The fatty membranes that cover all brain cells are particularly subject to oxidative damage. Free radical damage is implicated in cognitive decline and memory loss as people age and in Alzheimer’s disease.

A steady level of antioxidants - including vitamins C and E and beta-carotene - is linked to strong memories, according to studies in the Netherlands and Australia.

The body gets antioxidants both by manufacturing them and consuming them in foods. They are found most abundantly in fruits and vegetables, but all plants have at least a small amount of antioxidants. Dietary sources of these chemicals are particularly important during stressful times, when body loses its ability to make them.

Berries, tea, garlic and wine are all well-known sources of antioxidants. But cocoa beans top them all, says Joe Vinson, Ph.D., a chemistry professor at the University of Scranton in Pennsylvania. His research shows that cocoa beans are the most potent source of polyphenols, a large subgroup of antioxidants.

Because polyphenols are found in the cocoa bean - not the milk, cream, sugar or other additives - the darker the chocolate, the better. As a rule, antioxidants are found in the pigments of fruits and veggies, so the more colorful the food, the richer in antioxidants.

By weight, cocoa powder packs the most antioxidant punch,

according to Vinson’s research. “It is loaded!” the chemist says. It has twice as many antioxidants as dark chocolate, which in turn has twice as many as milk chocolate. White chocolate has no antioxidants at all.

The number of polyphenols in a serving of dark chocolate is comparable to that in a cup of black tea and higher than in a glass of red wine, things long touted as great sources of antioxidants.

Hot chocolate is the best bet for those looking for the antioxidant punch without the punch that cocoa butter could bring. But it’s important to make the hot chocolate from scratch, with pure cocoa powder, milk and sugar, says Vinson. His studies have shown that homemade hot chocolate has five times as many antioxidants as a store-bought mix.

So, think of chocolate as a brain food.

“People thank me all the time for telling them that chocolate is good for them,” says Vinson. “And really it is. I eat a little bit of chocolate every day.” ✦

Rescue Spotlight

Meet picture-perfect NOMAD ! This 1-year-old German Shepherd mix is like one big teddy bear! He almost always has a goofy smile with his tail wagging when we see him! Nomad is very friendly, social, outgoing, smart, and charming. He enjoys everyone he meets and tends to lean in for pets. Nomad would make the best adventure buddy by day and snuggle companion by night.

Nomad is looking to be the king of his castle (no other pets) so he can get all the love he desires. He would make a great family pet with kiddos who can be gentle with him. He weighs 68 lbs. and is neutered, microchipped, up to date on vaccines, goes home with a certificate for a free veterinary exam, postadoption support and more! We have a feeling he will make his new family feel beyond loved and laugh often.

Greenhill Humane Society is open seven days a week, 11 am – 6 pm at 88530 Green Hill Rd in Eugene. For more information call (541) 689.1503 or visit www.green-hill.org.

The Cat Rescue & Adoption Network presents MAMACITA (L) and BEAU (R), a marvelous mother and son bonded pair of young adult cats looking for a loving home. Mamacita came to CRAN as a rescue kitty with a litter of kittens that included Beau; all her other kittens have found homes, and now it’s this pair’s turn to find a devoted home to enjoy some loving attention. Mamacita and Beau are both still a bit shy and need an adopter who is willing to create a quiet and safe space for them to acclimate to their new home. Both cats are extremely sweet and will reward you in spades with love and affection! They have been altered, vaccinated, microchipped, and are negative for FIV & FeLV. For more info, please call 541-225-4955 option 1, or visit our website at CatRescues.org

Make Breakfast More Manageable

Mornings for many families involve hurried breakfasts and mad dashes out the door. These Egg Tot Muffins can help take that graband-go breakfast to the next level. High in protein and flavor, they are a good way to get rid of early morning brain fog. Plus, you can make them ahead of time so all you have to do is pop them in the microwave and enjoy on the go. Find more morning meal inspiration at Culinary.net

EGG TOT MUFFINS

Recipe courtesy of “Cookin’ Savvy”

Servings: 12

INGREDIENTS

• Butter

• 36 thawed tater tots

• 10 eggs

• 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream or half-and-half

• 1/2 cup shredded cheese

• 2 teaspoons garlic powder

• 2 teaspoons onion powder

• 1 package (2 1/2 ounces) real bacon pieces

• salt, to taste

• pepper, to taste

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Heat oven to 350 F.

2. Grease muffin tin with butter. Place three tots in each muffin hole and smash down.

3. In bowl, whisk eggs, cream, cheese, garlic powder, onion powder and bacon pieces. Season with salt and pepper, to taste. Fill each muffin hole completely with mixture.

4. Place cookie sheet under muffin tin to contain messes and bake 20-25 minutes.

A Sweet Evening-Ender

Nearly anytime can be a good time for a decadent dessert, but this one will definitely fit the bill for any Valentine. This Creamy Raspberry Mocha Parfait, which combines the flavors of instant coffee, chocolate and raspberries, can be a perfect nightcap for almost any meal.

CREAMY RASPBERRY MOCHA PARFAIT

Servings: 4

INGREDIENTS

• 2 tablespoons hot water

• 1 tablespoon instant coffee

• 1 packet chocolate pudding mix

• 2 cups milk

• 1 carton whipped topping

• 1 cup heavy cream

• 1/4 teaspoon cream of tartar

• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

• 2 tablespoons sugar

• 2 cups raspberries

• whipped cream, for topping

• chocolate powder, for dusting

INSTRUCTIONS

1. In small bowl, mix hot water and instant coffee. Cool completely.

2. In medium bowl, mix milk and chocolate pudding mix until blended and thickened. Add cooled coffee; mix well. Add whipped topping; mix well. Chill.

3. In large bowl, add heavy cream, cream of tartar and vanilla extract. Beat mixture to form peaks. Gradually add sugar. Continue beating mixture until stiffer peaks form.

4. In four parfait glasses, layer chocolate pudding mix, whipped cream mix and raspberries. Top raspberries with additional chocolate pudding mix, dollop of whipped cream, another raspberry and dust with chocolate powder.

Recipes

Find more dessert recipes at Culinary.net

Learning to save is a skill that lasts a lifetime.

We started the OnPoint Savers Account for children 17 and under so that kids can get a head start on learning healthy savings habits. Just open your child’s membership with a minimum of $25 and we’ll deposit an additional $55*. Plus, they’ll earn 5.00%* on the first $500. Not a bad way to start for a beginner, don’t you think?

CLARA SPRINGFIELD EUGENE

Get started today. Visit onpointcu.com/onpoint-savers

*Rates subject to change. Stated APY (Annual Percentage Yield) is for balances up to $500; balances over $500 earn posted Regular Savings Account rate. Account must be established for members age 17 or younger by parent or guardian with a minimum $25 deposit. Parent or legal guardian must be on the membership and present to open the OnPoint Savers Account. When primary member attains the age of 18, accounts will be converted to Regular Savings Account, earning that account’s published rate at that time. Fiduciary memberships, including UTTMA and Minor Settlement Accounts are not eligible for OnPoint Savers. One OnPoint Savers Account per member/ TIN. One $55 bonus per tax ID for new members only. Bonus will be included on a 1099-INT for tax purposes. Cannot be combined with other offers for opening a new membership, such as new branch promotions or Refer a Friend. Federally insured by NCUA. 7/24

SANTA