What is prayer?

What is

Prayer?

ï&#x20AC;&#x201A; Looking Deeper

 Looking Deeper What is prayer?

y husband announced that we were going to a special Royal Navy luncheon in London where the Queen would be the guest of honour. I had never met any of the Royal Family so I decided to read the rules of etiquette: Men are to bow, women curtsy (right foot behind left). Speak only if spoken to. Do not ask questions. Do not touch her. Shake hands only if hers is offered. Do not turn your back or leave the room before her. And on and on . . . I shopped for an appropriate ‘day’ dress, bought a train ticket and booked a hotel; by the end of which I had spent a small fortune. All of this just to see the Queen; there was no guarantee of actually speaking with her.

On the day, we were all arranged into little horseshoes. She would definitely meet the first five groups. I was in group six. After waiting what seemed like hours, Her Majesty appeared in the doorway. Without stepping out of place it was difficult to catch a glimpse. Introductions, greetings, handshakes (initiated by her, of course) and polite small talk could be heard amidst the general flurry of activity. As promised, she met the first five groups. And then she was gone; out of the marquee and out of sight. As the cars drove away, even those of us who only caught a fleeting glimpse were buzzing with excitement. The rest of the day was spent reliving the highlights; speaking of her great presence and charm, and what an honour it was to have been near one of the most important figures in the world. So much trouble and expense just for a silent and brief peek of a human monarch! Yet as Christians we have access to Almighty God, the King of kings—every moment of every day. We don’t need to queue up, buy the right clothes, have the right posture, say the right words or know the rules to get His attention. We can just come to Him as we are. Whether we’ve been Christians all our lives or for the last five minutes, our words and thoughts—all our prayers—are heard and valued by Him. But how do we make the most of our free access to the King of the universe?

[2] WHAT IS PRAYER?

What is prayer?

rayer is a fancy word for how we live out our relationship with God. It’s all about spending time with Him, like in any relationship. We only get to know people when we are with them, speaking and listening, paying attention to them and doing life with them. A life of prayer means that the Person we’re doing everything with is Jesus. And it’s a gift, just like the Queen’s attention is a gift. Her Majesty’s attention can also be earned by good works, great achievements or rising to the head of the national government. But none of these things are needed for us to get God’s attention. We have been given the gift of completely unlimited access! When we trust Jesus, God makes His As Christians we home with us (John 14:23)—and we are hidden with Jesus have access in God (Colossians 3:3). So it’s to Almighty like we are always in God’s presence. We just have to God, the King speak, out loud or in our of kings—every minds, and we already have moment of His undivided attention. This is why the Bible calls us God’s every day. children so frequently

[3]

(see, for example, Galatians 3:26; Hebrews 12:7; 1 John 3:1),

because no ruler would think of giving this kind of access to anyone else. Kings and Queens need space from their A life of prayer subjects, but never from their own children. They alone can means that barge into the king’s bedroom the Person at 2 a.m. because their sock fell we’re doing off or they had a bad dream— and expect a welcome. That is everything the new life with God that Jesus with is Jesus. has won for us through His death and resurrection.

[4] WHAT IS PRAYER?

How not to pray

race, the precocious, fast-talking eight year old who lives next door, was visiting the pharmacy with her mum. She chattered away to the pharmacist, telling him that she was praying that she wouldn’t have to go to school because she’d picked up a cold. Mum interrupted and said, “Darling, don’t pray that. I’m praying that you will be able to go. We can’t pray opposite prayers!” When Grace was telling the story to us later that day, she said in triumph, “But I prayed harder and I won!” Make your prayers impressive: We often think about prayer as Grace does—we ask God for what we want, and if we are really good, pray hard and impress Him, we win and get our prayer answered! But Jesus explained: When you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him. —Matthew 6:7-8

The “pagans” were people who had no relationship with God. Because they didn’t actually know God for themselves, for them, ‘god’ was just a powerful being who could be persuaded to grant wishes for those who showed themselves worthy. Even today, this is one of the most widespread views of prayer.

HOW NOT TO PRAY [5]

Use your prayers to get attention: When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. —Matthew 6:5 Here, Jesus was exposing the selfishness of the religious leaders who just used prayer to show off how good they were. Really they were only worried about their own fame. Imagine chatting to a friend—but you keep talking loudly about yourself with one eye on the other people in the room who you hope are listening in and being impressed. In this scenario, you’re not really talking to your friend at all. That’s what Jesus was warning against in our praying. Whilst prayer is often spoken out loud in groups—it is still about focusing on God and being real with Him. Make your prayers all about getting what you want: We are told, very clearly to “cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). However, as much as we can ask God for everything we need, we are also warned: “When you ask [God], you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (James 4:3). Our prayers can be about what we need, and God wants us to share all our worries and wants with Him, but that isn’t the only thing our prayers are about. God is our Father in heaven who wants a real, deep relationship with us, which involves much more than just giving Him a list of stuff we want—and then just leaving Him to get on with it. [6] WHAT IS PRAYER?

How to pray

s there a standard way to talk to our friends and family? Of course not. We speak to them, laugh with them, cry with them, sit quietly with them, share meals with them and do hundreds of other things with them. There is no formula for relationships, and so there is no formula for prayer. We can simply talk to God and know that He There is no listens. formula for Having said that, Jesus did give His disciples a model for prayer relationships, in Matthew 6:9-13. He didn’t and so there intend for this prayer to simply be is no formula thoughtlessly chanted over and over again. The prayer model He for prayer. gave was exactly that: a model and guide. Sometimes we will want to simply praise God, making no requests at all. Other times we will maybe just focus on a temptation we can’t seem to beat or a person we’re struggling to forgive. Within this prayer model we are given this key principle: let’s focus on God, not ourselves. It also shows us how straightforward and to-the-point our prayers can be.

HOW TO PRAY  [7]

“This, then, is how you should pray: “ ‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.’ ” —Matthew 6:9-13 Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name: When we talk to the Ruler and Maker of all things, we can call Him “Dad” or “Father”! Jesus has won us the “right” (see John 1:12) to approach God and speak with Him in this intimate way. Simply calling God “Dad” in itself can bring us some much needed calm and peace when our prayers are full of worries and stress. While we call Him “Dad”, we’re also to “hallow” His name. Hallowing is all about honouring or paying respect. When we begin prayer by praising God for His strength, love and power, we are reminding ourselves just how small our problems are by comparison. Rather than prayer being a continuation of our stress, it can be a place of peace and certainty that the One we are talking to is willing and able to provide all we need at just the right time. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven: The emphasis of our prayers should [8] WHAT IS PRAYER?

be about wanting God’s kingship to be acknowledged and his ways followed. This is a challenging focus to have. When we’re being bullied or treated unfairly by someone for example, Jesus wants to help move our prayers from, “God, give this person what they deserve; and remove them from my life,” to something like: “Father, even in my pain, how can I show Jesus’ love to this person so that they might want to know You too? I want to escape, but what is Your plan in all this? Please give me the strength and courage to live it out.” Jesus gives us the perfect example of this. The night of His arrest, He prayed: “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will” (Matthew 26:39). Jesus shared His honest feelings with His Father, and then “entrusted himself to him who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23). Praying like this requires us to trust God more than our own instincts. But it will help us learn God’s perspective on the people and world around us. Give us today our daily bread: Everything we are and have is from God (Acts 17:25) and so we are right to ask Him for anything. Jesus encouraged His disciples to “ask me for anything in my name” (John 14:14). Talking to God about all our needs is His answer to worry and anxiety. Asking “in Jesus’ name” also means we’re not necessarily just giving God a wish list of new cars and more money. It means asking for Him to meet our needs, and the needs of others, in His way and timing, even if He doesn’t do what we expect.

HOW TO PRAY  [9]

The image of “daily bread” also shows that we should be depending on God every day. Just as our needs are daily, so too should our time with God be regular as we face each task, problem and situation. And forgive us our debts: This isn’t about listing our failures with our heads down and feeling like we’re terrible, terrible people. When we admit how we have fallen short of the love and worship God deserves (our “debts”), we do so because of Jesus’ death on the cross which cleans us from all sin. Although admitting some things can be painful, the result is freedom, joy and excitement as we look forward to our future in Jesus’ home. We confess our sin not to take hold of guilt, but to give all our shame to Jesus to bear on the cross (Romans 8:1). Anything we have on our conscience should be talked about with God. Stuff we try to hide will only get in the way of our relationship. It is also a good idea to ask God if there’s anything in our lives that we’re unaware of which isn’t right—so we can confess whatever He might show us and move on from it with Him (Psalm 139:24). As we also have forgiven our debtors: “Forgive as the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:13). In Jesus’ prayer model, forgiving is the natural response to being forgiven. We cannot withhold from others anything we have been given so generously by God. And this willingness to forgive starts in our conversations with God Himself. We may well need to forgive people to their faces or make up with them in [10] WHAT IS PRAYER?

some way. But when we talk with God about them, He can help make sure our forgiveness isn’t just ‘words’, but a real change in our attitude to stop us growing bitter. The people who have hurt us will also stop being monsters we wish would just go away, and will instead become people again; people who need God just as much as we do. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one: As people who belong to God and have His Holy Spirit living in us, we want to live right. But we all know that there are selfish or wrong things we just can’t seem to escape. Here Jesus is giving us part of the strategy for fighting against temptation: talk about it with God! Firstly we need to focus on God and His guidance. We want to be led well, so we need to “[fix] our eyes on Jesus”, “[throwing] off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles” (Hebrews 12:1-2). He alone has the strength we need to make wise decisions in the day ahead. Secondly, most of us know our weaknesses; we might even know the situations in which we’ll be tempted. Talking about our weakness with God puts us on guard. The devil is looking to trip us up all the time, just as he tried to with Jesus (Matthew 4:1-11). Praying helps us to be ready for the day and challenges ahead. The Holy Spirit can equip us with the Bible’s teaching and the strength to make good decisions and to rely on Him. If we don’t pray, we are much more likely to fall into the usual routines and mistakes.

HOW TO PRAY  [11]

The attitude of prayer

longside Jesus’ prayer model, the Bible teaches us a couple of other things to help show what the attitude behind our prayers should be: Thankful: We are told to give thanks to God “always” (Ephesians 5:20) and “in all circumstances” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). If we are honest, we easily forget to make thanksgiving a regular part of our prayers— especially when things are hard. But these verses are clear that in all our prayers, even when we are bringing our most raw and desperate needs to God, we can (and should) do so with thankfulness. The Bible isn’t necessarily saying we should be thankful for the problems we have, but for the Person we bring those problems to. Thanksgiving is a way of showing our confidence that God will indeed act, and of recognising the many times God has helped us in the past. We thank Him for who He is, for what He will do and that He is in control. Continual: We are also to “pray continually” (1 Thessalonians 5:17). That means that our whole lives can be a conversation with our Heavenly Father. When something is troubling us, we can simply say, “God, I’m not sure what to do about this . . .” and just tell Him exactly what we’re feeling, like we would to a friend or someone who knows us well. It may be we stop everything and speak with Him for a while, or it may be [12] WHAT IS PRAYER?

we simply say a quick sentence to Him to for help when we’re in the middle of something. Those desperate ‘in the moment’ prayers show both our need for God and our unchallenged access to Him to just say it as it is, straightaway. No pomp or ceremony needed! Praying regularly is also the way our relationship with our Father and King grows. If we don’t talk with a friend for a long time, we will grow distant from them. Whereas, the more we see them, the more we get to know them and grow comfortable around them. It’s the same with God! It’s challenging to think how much we buzz with excitement when we get a glimpse of the Queen or take a quick selfie with a famous person. We have the ear of the King of the universe every moment of every day— as we talk with Him throughout our days, we’ll find knowing Him is far more exciting! Fasting: Fasting can be a big topic to discuss, but it’s important to mention a couple of key things about it here. Jesus does not say “if you fast”, but “when” (Matthew 6:16). Fasting from food (or perhaps today other things like smartphones or TV) is a way to focus our minds on the seriousness of prayer and to remind us of our reliance on God to meet our needs. The ‘hunger’ that comes from denying ourselves something is an urgent prompt to talk to God again about whatever has made us fast in the first place. There is no rule about how long we should fast or how often—it is simply another tool we have to focus our prayers. And it’s one that Jesus expects us to use. But it is between us and God only, and not a way to get attention or show off how good we are (v.16).

THE ATTITUDE OF PRAYER [13]

The purpose of prayer

hile we can and should bring all our needs to God, Jesus’ prayer model and the other teaching in the Bible seems to suggest the real purpose of prayer is even deeper than this. When we spend time with God, the Holy Spirit works in us to teach us “the deep things of God . . . so that we may understand what God has freely given us” (1 Corinthians 2:10-12). It is in our reflective times with God that we will find our relationship with Him deepening. As we get to know Him and what pleases Him, we will grow in our understanding of how to handle problems, how to wait for Him to act and how to pray about the things we’re going through. So, while we do receive answers and direction in our prayer time, we also get more of God Himself. Loads more could be said about the purpose of prayer and what it means to live in an active, daily conversation with God. For now there are two more things in particular I want to highlight: Peace: Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. —Philippians 4:6-7 [14] WHAT IS PRAYER?

We can bring everything we’re worried and stressed Our peace is about to God. And in return we are promised peace, “which based in Jesus, transcends all understanding” who shows just because it has nothing to do with our circumstances. what lengths After prayer, often nothing God will go changes—our problems remain and difficult people are just as to in order to difficult. And yet, after prayer rescue us. so much does change, including our perspective—because we have given everything to the One who has power and control, and who has our good in mind. Our peace is based in Jesus, who shows just what lengths God will go to in order to rescue us. Sometimes this peace will come quickly. Sometimes we may need to pray for a long time to really give our stress to God and trust Him with it. Other times, we’ll have to pray as part of our ongoing conversation, here and there throughout the day—as often as our worry comes to mind. But the Bible promises us that even when we feel anxious and unsettled, we can fix our minds on our peace with God won through Jesus’ death and resurrection. Christ-likeness: Prayer also changes things because it is the arena in which we ourselves are changed. As we read the Bible, praise God for His goodness and love, ask for forgiveness or pray about

THE PURPOSE OF PRAYER [15]

difficult people, the Holy Spirit challenges us firstly about ourselves and how we’re living. In everything we are invited to be more like Him. God wants us to be more like Jesus in our attitude and actions (Galatians 5:22-23), and so that is the work He is often doing in us during our time with Him. There is much more that could be said about our relationship with God. You can go to ourdailybread. org/lookingdeeper to read booklets like Why doesn’t God answer me? and How do you read the Bible? Or you can check out loads more Bible teaching at discoveryseries.org

[16] WHAT IS PRAYER?

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