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Brian had his HIV under control with medication. But smoking with HIV caused him to have serious health problems, including a stroke, a blood clot in his lungs and surgery on an artery in his neck. Smoking makes living with HIV much worse. You can quit.
CALL 1-800-QUIT-NOW.
#CDCTips
HIV alone didn’t cause the clogged artery in my neck. Smoking with HIV did. Brian, age 45, California
O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M  3
CONTENTS MAY 18, 2016 VOL40 NO04
20 10 DENVER GENTRIFICATION ALSO AFFECTS PEOPLE WITH HIV 12 BEING GAY IN THE DEEP SOUTH VS. BEING GAY HERE
26
16 COLORADO AIDS PROJECT — MORE THAN YOU KNOW
14
20 FINE, DENVER. YA GREW ON ME, DAMMIT. 24 HOW DO THEY WHERE I’M FROM? 32 NOW IT’S TIME FOR: “WHAT WAS THERE?” 34 HEY, MY NAME IS CHRIS AND I’M NOT A COLORADO NATIVE 42 HEINZESIGHT 51 DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: BE MORE PESSIMISTIC 58 BISEXUAL DATING IN DENVER
36 ON THE COVER
Illustration by Trisha Himmler.
4 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
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JUNE 18 CITY HALL A P P L E J A X X S TA C H E . C O M IN PARTNERSHIP WITH: O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M 5
Ryan Howe
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TRANS WOMAN WINS SEAT IN PHILIPPINES PARLIAMENT The Philippines just made history as the predominantly Catholic country elected a trans woman into its House of Represenatives. Liberal Party candidate Geraldine Roman trounced her closest rival in the congressional district of Bataan, winning 62 percent of the unofficial vote count with 99 percent of precincts reporting. This trailblazing woman broke the odds in a country where church influence means divorce, abortion, and samesex marriage are banned. “The politics of bigotry, hatred, and discrimination did not triumph. What triumphed was the politics of love, acceptance,
and respect,” Roman said after her victory for a seat in Congress representing the farming province of Bataan, just northwest of Manila.
Forty-nine-year-old Roman has been living as a woman for the past two decades and has a male partner. She had a successful career as senior editor at the Spanish News Agency. She speaks Spanish, French, and Italian and won a scholarship to study in Spain, where she met her partner of 18 years.
Roman, a Catholic, said she was looking forward to becoming a lawmaker so she could respond to critics who dismissed her as a one-issue politician not to be taken seriously.
The daughter of political parents, Roman ran for the seat last held by her mother and vowed to carry on her family’s call to public service. Her mother had to stand down after serving the maximum number of three terms. Roman’s father was a former congressman whose death in 2014 prompted her to consider continuing the family legacy in congress.
“I’m elated; very, very happy. I’m also excited to work. I realise that the burden is bigger because the stereotype of [LGBT] people … is we are frivolous, that we have nothing substantial to say, so I have to prove them wrong,” she said.
During her run for congress she downplayed the notion that she was a novelty candidate while campaigning in her northern Philippines district; putting the spotlight on her policies rather than her gender. “Equality [is] not only in terms of gender but also in terms of socioeconomic status. To be rich or poor should not matter. Whether educated or not, people should have the same opportunities; so I’m going beyond gender to include more issues,” she said.
There’s no denying that queers are forcing their way into mainstream sports. From professionals coming out to organizations forming in support of queer youth on and off the field, the world of professional athletics is becoming more and more accepting. This week, ESPN continued this inclusiveness when they hired out soccer star Abby Wambach as an analyst and commentator for the upcoming Rio Olympics. This comes after the network fired Curt Schilling for an antitransgender Facebook post, proving ESPN is dedicated to equality and stands firmly against bigotry. Wambach, who retired from professional soccer in October, is the
all-time leading scorer for the United States Women’s Soccer Team with 184 career goals. Oh yeah, she also helped the team score a gold medal in its second FIFA World Cup Title. Alongside commentating the Olympics, the soccer legend will also be a part of Outside the Lines and provide commentary for films produced by ESPN and
produce a podcast called Fearless Conversation with Abby Wambach. “My soccer career has provided me with a lot of different experiences that brings more than Xs and Os to the table,” Wambach told ESPN. “I’m excited to join ESPN and to have the opportunity to tell stories that transcend soccer.”
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Ryan Howe
IN CASE YOU
MISSED IT JUST A TIDBIT FROM OUTFRONTONLINE.COM
UK ISSUES TRAVEL WARNING TO ANTI-QUEER US STATES The United Kingdom’s Foreign Office recently issued a travel warning to British tourists visiting the American South, specifically referencing North Carolina and Mississippi. Why? Because if someone from our queer family flies across the Atlantic and into the Tar Heel State, then they are subject to the ridiculous, bigoted antiqueer laws that have recently passed. Yes North Carolina, HB 2 has now elevated your state even more red. Red as in dangerous. On the UK’s Foreign Office website, under the local laws and customs section of the US
travel advice, is the following message: Laws vary from state to state. When you are physically present in a state, even temporarily, you are subject to that state’s laws. You must carry a passport showing that you have leave to enter or remain with you at all times. The US is an extremely diverse society and attitudes towards LGBT people differ hugely across the country. LGBT travellers may be affected by legislation passed recently in the states of North Carolina and Mississippi. Before travelling please read our general travel advice for the
LGBT community. You can find more detail on LGBT issues in the US on the website of the Human Rights Campaign. Possession or trafficking of a controlled substance in the United States can carry a severe prison sentence and/or fine. Check with each state you are intending to visit to make sure you comply with the personal possession and consumption laws of controlled substances within those states. A list of all types of controlled substances, as listed under the Controlled Substances Act, can be found on the US Department of Justice website. Details of the assistance offered by the British Embassy and Consulates to British nationals if arrested or detained in the US is available on GOV.UK. This is just embarrassing now. When one of our nation’s closest allies are warning their citizens that traveling to Mississippi or North Carolina is unsafe because of the laws passed by its elected officials, then it’s time to rethink laws. The world is laughing at you alongside the rest of the nation.
NC’S BATHROOM BILL VIOLATES CIVIL RIGHTS ACT ACCORDING TO DOJ LETTER North Carolina’s anti-queer House Bill 2 — which has brought the Tar Heel State more bad attention and coverage than it could have ever expected — is one step closer to being overturned. The Charlotte Observer reports that the Justice Department has sent a letter to the North Carolina governor Pat McCrory notifying him that the law violates the US Civil Rights Act. State officials must stop enforcing the law, or else risk losing millions in federal education funding. According to the letter, HB 2 is “in violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 … “Title VII prohibits an employer from 8 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
discriminating against an individual on the basis of sex and from otherwise resisting the full enjoyment of Title VII rights … “Access to sex-segregated restrooms and other workplace facilities consistent with gender identity is a term, condition, or privilege of employment. Denying such access to transgender individuals, whose gender identity is different from the gender assigned at birth, while affording it to similarly situated non-transgender employees, violates Title VII … “HB 2 … is facially discriminatory against transgender employees on the basis of sex because it treats transgender employees,
whose gender identity does not match their biological sex, as defined by HB 2, differently from similarly situated non transgender employees …” “The right and expectation of privacy in one of the most private areas of our personal lives is now in jeopardy. We will be reviewing to determine the next steps.”
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O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M 9
DENVER GENTRIFICATION ALSO AFFECTS PEOPLE WITH HIV “FIRST, THE GAYS MOVE IN,” GOES THE GENTRIFICATION formula. “Then the artists, then the developers.” Queer families and individuals have often chosen to live in places straight people have shunned, but to say that gays spruce up the hood oversimplifies the story and writes out the queer people displaced by gentrification, including queer people without papers, queer people of color, low-income gays, and people living with HIV. This last group is one of the most vulnerable to gentrification in Denver, particularly as the metro area faces a 27,000-unit gap in affordable housing. While HIV treatment has improved and more HIV+ individuals can live longer and function normally, the fact that people with HIV can blend in also means that their unique challenges — not only affordable housing but also access to care — may be invisible, even to the queer community. “The face of AIDS we used to have is gone,” says community member Bruce Chopnik, 56, citing Kaposi’s sarcoma. “Just because we don’t see it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.” Tim Imborski, 63, was forced to relocate due to his fixed income. “They turned my apartment into condos, and I was unable to find an apartment I could afford in Capitol Hill. I don’t have a vehicle, so it made my life even tougher. I had to rely on my friends to pick me up and take me to the doctor.” Tim, who was diagnosed with HIV in 1986, lived in Capitol Hill from 1981–2010, when he moved to Aurora. He returned to Capitol Hill two years later when he found a subsidized apartment through DCAP. “I wanted to live in Capitol Hill to be near the community. Everything is convenient — the doctor’s office, the grocery store, the hospital. I’m on oxygen, so I don’t really get out except to the doctor and the grocery store.” But, Bruce counts himself lucky to be walking distance from the Eastside HIV Primary Care Clinic in Five Points. Back in October, however, he was unable to walk anywhere when horrific housing conditions — black mold, exposed electrical wires, and open plumbing — contributed to his deteriorating health. “If you live in shit, you feel like shit,” Bruce explains, “When the city inspector condemned the place, they 1 0 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
asked me, ‘Why did you live here?’ and I answered, ‘I couldn’t make the [housing] change while I was trying to get better.’” Given the conditions of Bruce’s rented home, his medical providers at Eastside insisted he stay in respite and then a hotel until he could find suitable, affordable housing. The Eastside HIV Primary Care Clinic was funded through the Ryan White CARE Act of 1990 and serves over 500 low-income patients with HIV, 74.1 percent who are below 100 percent of the Federal poverty level, and 19.8 percent who are below 200 percent. With Five Points’ home values up to half a million, however, many of the clinic’s patients have been forced to the margins of the city, far from where they receive care. “Traditionally, it was 1/3, 1/3, 1/3: African American, Hispanic, white,” explains Dr. Josh Blum, director of Denver Health HIV Primary Care Clinic. “But patients who have historically lived in the neighborhood are being displaced.” Due to these shifts, Denver Health has opened HIV clinics in Southwest Denver and Lowry to reach an increasingly scattered population. “Ten years ago, it was not like this,” Dr. Blum explains. “If you talk to my social worker, we have patients coming in every day saying, ‘I can’t find a place to live.’ We have chronically homeless and unstablehoused people living with friends. We are going west and east because our patients are west and east.”
Native Paul Bindel
The biggest challenge facing low-income people with HIV is that new housing is not frequently available. Section 8 housing lottery waitlists are incredibly long. Housing Opportunities for People With AIDS (HOPWA), though a crucial resource during the AIDS crisis, have had dramatically less turnover as AIDS mortality rates have dropped. Low turnover is a good thing, but it also means that fewer HOPWA homes have become available, even as rents rise throughout the city. Finally, though the city requires new development to have a percentage of affordable units, many people with HIV are on fixed incomes and unable to qualify for these units. “They’re really discounted,” Dr. Blum acknowledges. “But you have to prove that your income is 2.5 times the monthly rent, which disqualifies most of my patients right off the bat because they are on fixed incomes of $700/month.” Bruce found his current place by walking on foot up and down neighborhoods near the clinic, recognizing that a similar search would not have been possible when he was debilitated months earlier. “It’s not that the only affordable places to live are in Aurora or Arvada,” Bruce says, “but that there are more affordable places to choose from there. If you want affordable housing, you have to put in the work to find it. That means being the first person to contact the lessee, and the best way to do that is on foot.” Access to care is vital for people with HIV, but it’s also key for all populations disproportionately affected by the disease. While Denver has committed to 90-90-90 treatment targets by 2030, Colorado Health Institute explains that, “without access to care, people are less likely to know their HIV status and less likely to receive proper treatment if they are diagnosed, both of which increase the risk of transmission.” Denver Health is to be applauded for relocating its clinics to serve a broader geographical range, but the City and County of Denver must recognize how gentrification and rising rents have reduced access to care by scattering members of the queer community, making them more vulnerable to HIV-infection, sickness, poverty, and homelessness. Members of the queer community can still support the most vulnerable among us. For some, that could mean providing your friends or acquaintances a place to stay while they search for housing near health clinics. For others, it may mean donating to health and housing organizations to ensure they can continue providing services around the city. For landlords, it means not raising your rents just because the market says you can. For all of us, it means advocating for City and County of Denver policies that recognize, value, and protect the interests of all citizens. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 11
PERSPECTIVES
BEING GAY IN THE DEEP SOUTH VS. BEING GAY HERE WHEN YOU GROW UP GAY IN THE DEEP SOUTH AND MOVE to a city, it can be quite a revelation. There are some differences you expect, and others that are so nuanced, you don’t really notice them until you take a step back and look at the full picture. After returning to Alabama last year, there are some things I miss about Denver’s gay community and others I didn’t realize I missed about the South’s gay community.
LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT THING! While there are undoubtedly more gay men in Denver (at least ones who are open), the overall dynamic of the community is the same in Alabama. The longer I lived in Denver, the more I realized how much overlap there is in the gay community. There are only a few degrees of separation between nearly every gay man in the Mile High, and the same can be said of most gay men in Alabama. Gay men in Alabama might not know each other personally, but there’s a good chance we’ve all seen or at least know of each other through hookups, dating sites, or dating apps.
CLUB KIDS Another big difference in gay culture between Alabama and Denver is that gay clubs and bars are easier to find and closer together in CO. If I want to go to the closest gay bar/club here in Alabama, I’ve got to drive roughly an hour. When I moved to Denver, I loved the fact that not only were there more gay clubs and bars closer to where I lived, there were a variety of options. No matter what kind of subculture, music, atmosphere, flavor of guys, or mood you wanted, there was either a place that was absolutely perfect or one that was close enough to sate your appetites.
THE LOVE THAT DARE NOT TEXT ITS NAME The dating experience is another striking difference I noticed. Here in the South I had to watch how I acted when I was on a date (I say had because I’ve decided not to date while I’m back here). When I did put my heart out there, I was always self-conscious of the people around us, paranoid that they knew the two guys next to them were gay, and that they were 1 2 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
planning to bash us either verbally or physically. It never felt safe to hold hands, kiss, sit next to each other, or stare into one another’s eyes with the look of love. I did everything I could not to make myself even more of a target than I already was as a black man living in the South. While my concerns weren’t completely quelled when I dated in Denver, I felt as if I could at least breathe and not have to check my surroundings every five minutes.
NOT ALL RAIN AND WORRY While I much prefer the Mile High gay culture, there are some things I cherish about Southern gay men. Soft Southern accents can be charming, and I also enjoy the traditional Southern values and manners some gay guys have here. I don’t consider myself a Southerner, but it’s that kind of man who can make me think of changing my mind about that. It can be a challenge walking the tightrope between being a city guy at heart and having Southern roots. Part of me revels in the freedom of Denver’s gay community, and another part yearns for the simple love of the South. Hopefully, one day I’ll find a guy who makes me feel as if I don’t have to compromise or settle on either.
Former Transplant O’Brian Gunn
OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 13
A LETTER TO MOTORCYCLE SKEPTICS IF SOMEONE DOESN’T RIDE A MOTORCYCLE, OR DIDN’T grow up with a family of motorheads, there’s a good chance that when I show up to meet him/her somewhere on the bike, I’ll be subject to a lecture before I’m even greeted. “You really need to be careful out there,” Worry Wart might say, as though I’d never considered it. It’s then that I daydream of mountain-riding as they wax on about a cousin’s neighbor’s gardener’s astrologer who died when he left the bar shitfaced and helmet-less for what was to become his last ride. Next time, however, I’m going to pull a crumpled copy of this article from my riding jacket, smack it against Worry Wart’s chest, and go wait inside the coffee shop for my well-intentioned new friend to finish reading it and join me. The following are a few ways that I, and other responsible riders, avoid being a grim statistic. Let’s roll.
DRINKING AND RIDING No. The very last thing you want on a bike is compromised coordination. The simple act of leaning — even just a touch — is how most turns are navigated, so a wobbly ass and drunken jellyarms mean your sexy machine is interpreting: “Avoid straight lines, got it.” As well, target fixation (meaning you’re staring at what you don’t want to hit as opposed to the path you need to take to avoid hitting it) is a huge problem for a brain that isn’t thinking clearly and for eyes that are controlled by said booze-soaked brain. Honestly, I won’t even ride if I’m slightly hungover. Any alcohol in your system is bad news on a bike, my friend.
RIDING SANS HELMET (Sans is French for “without.”) “Imagine my surprise moving here to see all these chowderheads riding around without any skull-andbrain protection. Head injuries are Public Enemy No. 1 if you wanna stay alive after a wreck. I can’t think of any reasons you’d skip the brain bucket that don’t deal with vanity, stupidity, laziness, or that fatal combo.” No, you’re not so great a rider that you’re immune to wrecking. No, you’re not such a badass that being thrown off the bike and smeared across the interstate won’t mess you up. Oh, they’re pricey? Not as pricey as hospital bills for head trauma. They’re hot? Not as hot as road-rash on your lips and eyelids. I kinda 1 4 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
want to say you don’t look as cool as you think you do with your bandana and Oakley’s, but that probably means you’re in a biker gang, in which case: You look completely awesome and please don’t kill me, Sir Cool Guy.
GOING GEARLESS Dude. You sprung for a machine that costs thousands of dollars. Save a few more bucks and get some ankle coverage, gloves, riding pants, that helmet we were talking about, and a rad jacket with some built-in Kevlar, perhaps.
“SQUIDDING” You’ve seen them: doofuses on neon crotch-rockets, flipflops activated, T-shirts blowing up their back in that weird updraft, one hand on the handlebars, the other “chillin’” on their knees as they tear down 25 weaving in and out of traffic chuffing and smirking like you’re the annoying one. These guys and gals overestimate their ability to handle a motorcycle and sadly end up the statistic that ruins it for the rest of us. Riders with a semblance of respect and the will to live don’t like that mess either. We know these d-bags as ‘squids.’ It’s absolutely true that bad things can happen even to the best of riders, but a good riding class and lots of precaution go a long, injury-free way. We love riding because it’s a beautiful and therapeutic way to pass a lovely day and we value your safety as much as we value ours. So the next time you feel like balking at a rider, make sure you’re not wagging a finger at one of the good ones. If you just got this article pressed into your chest, though, you totally were. See you inside.
Transplant Greg Wheeler
LEGAL DIRECTORY
DOES YOUR CROTCH-ROCKET NEED AN INSURANCE CONDOM? Whether your Kill Bill-ing it on a Kawasaki, or leaning back on that Harley Road Glide, how you enjoy your motorcycle is up to you. But being properly protected on your motorcycle? That’s important to more than just you, Easy Rider. Look for these three coverages in your motorcycle insurance policy to ensure you’re safe on the road. Bodily Injury: This type of coverage safeguards you financially if you hurt someone else in an accident. If you don’t have this in place and the bills start piling up, you’ll be riding your new motorcycle to the pawn shop. Uninsured or Underinsured Motorist (UM/ UIM): This coverage is also waivable for Colorado motorists — but it shouldn’t be. Having UM/UIM covers you, should you be
hit by a driver who has no insurance, or not enough insurance to cover your damages. Recent numbers say that 1 in 6 drivers in Colorado are driving around with no insurance. Colorado doesn’t enforce helmet use, and motorcyclists are 26 times more likely to be injured in an auto accident. You wanna wait for that streetcar to hit you, huh, Brando? Medical Payments Coverage: Also commonly known as MedPay, it immediately pays medical expenses for you and everyone on your vehicle, and protects you regardless of who caused the accident. MedPay is important because it works before your health insurance kicks in, with no co-pays or limits, saving you from the upfront costs of an accident, costly ambulance rides, and ER bills. Understanding proper insurance is just as important as what armor you take out on the road. So keep the shiny side up and the rubber side down. Ride safe, Colorado. Questions about your motorcycle insurance? Call the Sawaya Law Firm today at 303-GOOD-LAW
303-GOOD-LAW • SawayaLaw.com 1600 Ogden St • Denver, CO Auto Accidents • Personal Injury Worker’s Comp. • Social Security
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303-501-1812 • BKH-Law.com 3900 E. Mexico Ave • Denver, CO Wills • Trusts • Estate Planning Probate • Elder Law
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The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.
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THE SAWAYA LAW FIRM
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OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 15
COLORADO AIDS PROJECT — MORE THAN YOU KNOW
Additionally, CAP’s prevention programs provide more than 3,500 free HIV tests annually, which include testing for STIs and Hep C, community education, free condoms, preventative tools, and the Access Point needle exchange program. All of these efforts are aimed at curbing the spread of HIV.
Now, that dream is becoming a reality. CHN has secured a prime location on the corner of Colfax and Krameria Street in Denver and the building is being prepared for a complete renovation with the help of architectural firm Mark Hoskin Architects. This new location will house all of CAP’s supportive services currently offered, as well as a brand new Howard Dental Center for oral healthcare services, and will serve as the administrative branch for all statewide CAP locations. The new space will include a full medical care clinic and convenient on-site pharmacy, as well as space to host community events and educational forums. The fullyrealized dream will be the first of its kind in the nation. Further validating the fact that Denver has been and will continue to be the true trailblazers, setting new standards for the LGBTQ and Allied community.
Today, the evolution of CAP and CHN continues. In 2015, CHN embarked on a bold and long-held dream to create the first comprehensive medical clinic devoted to the health and wellbeing of the queer community in Denver and their allies. The goal is to fund the purchase and remodel of a freestanding building, where they can more effectively administer all of their services and do so from a convenient location that is easily accessible by public transportation.
This is an exciting time for Colorado. You can be a part of this historic accomplishment by visiting ColordoHealthNetwork.org for information on how you can get involved. You can request updates, follow the progress and receive an exclusive invitation to the grand opening. While you’re at it, add your voice to the conversation and become part of the story by following CAP on social media: Facebook.com/ DenverCAP
IF YOU’VE BEEN AROUND DENVER’S QUEER COMMUNITY for a while, chances are you’ve heard of the Colorado AIDS Project. But what do you really know about CAP? Over the past three decades CAP’s role in the HIV epidemic has evolved. In 2011, CAP united each of its regional locations, making it a statewide entity with offices in major metropolitan areas such as Denver, Colorado Springs, Pueblo, Fort Collins, Greeley, and Grand Junction. Together with the Howard Dental Center in Denver, these organizations form the Colorado Health Network. CHN assists nearly 6,000 people annually with a variety of services that you may not be familiar with, which increases stability and access to healthcare statewide: »» Case management »» Mental health and substance abuse counseling »» Housing assistance and subsidies »» Transportation »» Oral health care »» Food bank and nutritional education »» Connection to insurance »» Emergency financial assistance
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OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 17
Native Yvonne Wright
Similar levels can be found in many rural pockets, especially in southern Colorado. Others are being pushed out of the state entirely. You may know Shayne Morgan from her many charity drag shows in Denver’s LGBT bars and clubs. “I was making $50,000 a year and still couldn’t make ends meet,” she says. When both her daughter and her girlfriend found themselves in the same position, they decided to move to Florida. Now, she says, instead of a cramped, one-bedroom apartment, they’re living in a threebedroom house for about the same price.
IT’S HARD TO IMAGINE, with its high priced boutiques and coffee shop-
lined streets, that Larimer Square was my first glimpse into poverty. Real poverty. As a child, my mother brought me down to the then-dilapidated part of Denver. She wanted me to know how “the other half” lived. In the 70s, it was a blighted neighborhood with graffiti-covered concrete from what was left of crumbling buildings. It’s the first time I saw men in filthy, ripped clothing; the first time I saw people keeping warm around make-shift fires; the first time I smelled chronic homelessness — urine mixed with vomit and other body odors. My mother used to go down and give them money. Many were drug addicts and alcoholics. She told me they would probably spend it on alcohol, but if we lived like that, we would need a drink too. Known as the Mile High City’s oldest and most historic block, it’s now a hipster’s paradise. It’s perhaps the first part of our city to replace poverty-stricken sectors with upscale restaurants, elite bars and 1 8 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
clubs, and luxury condos. Soon, the rest of the city followed suit. Sounds great, right? Not always. As Colorado’s economy booms, it’s not just the homeless who are being pushed out. Most lower-income areas are transforming into trendy hotspots — hotspots where local residents can no longer afford to live. The Business Insider ranks Colorado third in the nation for the fastestgrowing economy. Denver, like many metropolitan cities, is pushing much of its lower-income residents out. That doesn’t mean poverty here is gone; it’s just becoming more rural. Colorado Springs is ranked sixth in poverty growth nationwide with an 88 percent jump. Census data shows 20 percent of people in the southeast portion of the city are living at or below the poverty line.
It’s a situation more and more people find themselves in. Earning a good living, but not good enough to afford a decent place to live. Various rental companies report rents in Denver increased more than 5 percent every year since 2010, with a nearly 10 percent jump last year and another 9 percent increase anticipated this year. Denver rents are now the 10th highest among the nation’s top 20 cities. Larimer Square doesn’t smell of homelessness anymore. Today, an eclectic mix of nearby street foods combine the scents of Thai sushi rolls with gourmet jalapeno hot dogs, tacos, and barbecue. Fire isn’t used for warmth anymore; instead you’ll find pizzas, pretzels, even oysters roasting on one of the many wood or coal fueled brick ovens. The historic restored buildings now stand tall, housing some of the city’s finest chef-driven restaurants, art galleries, and trendy night spots. It costs a lot down here, not just in rent but in people lost. Our city is losing entire segments, mostly members of the diverse cultures that attracted many here in the first place.
PHOTO // RYAN MCGUIRE
No Hope for a Gentle Gentrification
If you’re a lesbian in Denver, chances are good you’ve been to one of Cathy Valentine’s legendary Memorial Day camping parties. She’s hosted parties and poker games here for more than two decades. But last year she, too, found herself hitting the road in search of lower rents. After living in Florida for less than a year, her partner’s mother became ill and they had to move back to Colorado. Cathy says, “We were paying $700 a month before we left for a very tiny place. Now that same tiny place is $1,200.”
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Fine, Denver. Ya Grew On Me, Dammit. Transplant Eva Woods
WHEN I FIRST MOVED HERE, PEOPLE NOTICED MY SOUTHERN ACCENT. “Florida,” is what I’d inform when they asked where I came from. And though I transferred from Jacksonville, I spent my formative years in the swamps of north FL, where netherworldly humidity, shoe-sized bugs, and illhidden rattlesnakes provided dubious company most of the year. Then Denver called to me with its promise of low humidity, charming White Christmases, and summers that, in comparison to the south, felt like autumn. What I wasn’t prepared for, as many transplants aren’t, are conversations that go like this: “Where you from?” “[Insert Your State].” “Oh, [Your State] sucks. Congrats on your move.” “Ever been to [My State]?” “Nope. But we’re better.” (Well ok, then.) And before I go forward, please hear me when I say: I completely get that not all natives do this. Some of you welcoming, kickass Coloradans are genuinely interested in hearing about where we came from and what we think of your city. Without a doubt, if I ran into a stranger from Colorado in my small hometown, I’d be ecstatic to get them into my home, put some sweet tea or a cold (probably cheap) beer in their hands, and ask if they’re hungry. That’s our way. Hell, even the stereotypical southern mouthbreather who hates the government (but is on
2 0 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 21
welfare, go figure) will pat the dust off his couch and insist you stick around while “Maw-Maw makes us some fraad cheekun and sweet ‘taters.” I suppose the Colorado equivalent would be to invite you on a hike, then insist you come to a Broncos pre-game at a stellar microbrew-house. Both are just as steeped in regional hospitality, and both very loving in their ways. But let’s get serious: The “congrats” on leaving your home state to be here (because your home “sucks in comparison”) is a cutting and very personal insult. When you bash someone’s home, you bash the culture they’ve been raised in, and you’ve bashed an enormous part of what makes them who they are today. So, in defiance to the (probably inadvertent) inhospitable welcome, but a tasteless welcome regardless, my eyes began to immediately see the unseemly aspects of this city — those that couldn’t hold a candle to my home state.
Then Denver called to me with its promise of low humidity, charming White Christmases, and summers that, in comparison to the south, felt like autumn.
The initial “ugh” came from the 55mph average “fast lane” speed. No one seems to observe that lower traffic should stay to the right. I’ve heard that it’s a “transplant” problem, but riding shotgun with a native on more than 10 occasions proves that the transplants are a scapegoat. And hey, listen: Denver is a small city. I get the impression that the natives still deploy that “small-town interstate speed” in spite of the “let’s goooo!” transplants. It’s your city — drive as you see fit. (But slower traffic should, as the law dictates, stay right.) As this is your city, this has grown on me. The potholes and gouges in your asphalt are something we’d never let our local government get away with back home. These are causes for major weaving in 2 2 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
both cars and motorcycles, and major weaving royally fucks up traffic. But! The snowing and salting and plowing wreaks a havoc that we don’t have to deal with back home. So! As this is your city, this has grown on me.
seeing as how you really love and support your team, I suppose I wasn’t hip to the burn the city felt. And now, seeing how the camaraderie is a good thing, I get it. As this is your city, this has grown on me.
The apoplectic football fever is pretty intense. Where once I said aloud that I dug my trip to Seattle, I was met with, “Then go live there!” Whoa, there. What’s that about. (Hint: Superbowl. 43 to 8, Seahawks. Yes, of course.) But
There are so many things I could go on about, but they all end up at the same place: You’re good people, even if you’re a little territorial. But hey: This is a great territory and I hope to truly belong someday.
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and fattening dishes that stick to your ribs. I remember when I first visited Denver how hard it was for me to find anyone who was obese. Not everyone here is buff, lean, and fit, but there is quite a noticeable difference when you grew up thinking that being obese was just a fact of life.
Former Transplant O’Brian Gunn
Capitol Thrill I lived in Cap Hill when I first moved to Denver. I figured it was the perfect spot for a writer and budding bohemian. While there are a few small clusters of “open-minded, open-hearted” spaces in Alabama, there wasn’t an entire community where you could wear, do, and be whomever and whatever you wanted. It’s not that Cap Hill felt like a revival of the 60s hippie movement, although it felt quite close to that, but there was this sense of otherness about it that I found refreshing.
How Do They Where I’m From? THE FIRST TIME I VISITED the Mile High City was September 2008.
Growing up in the deepest reaches of the South in Northwest Alabama, you can imagine the electric culture shock that jolted me to the core when I ventured downtown. I’ve always had a love affair with cities, and Denver made me feel right at home. The stacked buildings, the kinetic energy flowing along the streets with the orchestra of traffic, the plucking of people from all walks of life, the sense of unadulterated freedom. That sensation resonated down to my spiritual roots and took up residence there. I finally felt as if I belonged somewhere.
Compare and Contrast It wasn’t until March of ’09 that I moved to Denver, but when I did, I got to fully immerse myself in the transitional phase of moving from a mostly conservative and deeply religious location to one that was more liberal and open-minded. It was the people, activities, houses, lifestyles, bars, food, vibe, culture, and 2 4 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
physical surroundings. It was as if I had been disembodied for the first 23 years of my life and had finally found a space where I could feel alive, could breathe for the first time. There’s no denying that Southern cooking is unlike any other on the planet, but there’s also no refuting the fact that your waistline and health will pay the price of overindulgence in rich
But there were a few unpleasant bumps in my transition. Back in Alabama I never had to worry about where or when to park on the street. I felt as if I owed monthly tithes and offering to the City of Denver for all of the parking tickets I received when I first moved there. I also didn’t live near clubs and bars before I moved, which meant I never had to struggle to fall asleep to the sounds of bar and club patrons stumbling, chatting, and sometimes yelling their way home. Ah, city life.
Palate Cleanser Being a vegetarian where you have options other than sides was a welcome change when I moved to Denver. The fact that there are entire restaurants devoted to vegetarian and vegan dining made me feel less like a freak who was used to living around carnivores. Denver taught me how to be a better vegetarian and showed me possibilities and options I never knew existed. While there’s a lot more to compare between Denver and Alabama, these are the differences that struck me the deepest. Even though I’m no longer a resident of the Mile High City, Denver will most certainly always have a home in my heart, just as I had a home in hers.
OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 25
play with that little black girl?”
Native Yvonne Wright
So why would so many minorities move into what was once the fastest growing (mostly white) city in America? Dorothy is a realtor who’s watched the landscape change. She says the answer is simple: “It’s a nice place to raise your children. It’s clean, the crime rate is low, our economy is good.” With Amazon getting ready to open a facility in Aurora, the economy is expected to grow even more. As for racial prejudice, she says: “If you don’t encourage your children to discriminate, they don’t.”
AURORA
IT’S THE LARGEST DENVER SUBURB and the most culturally
diverse city in the state. One of only two Colorado cities where minorities are the majority, Aurora is experiencing a renaissance. Here, there is no majority culture. The city’s racial profile is so complex that Asian markets, Mexican restaurants, and East Indian incense shops are found on the same block. I am a member of the first graduating class of Aurora’s Overland High School. At the time, you could count the number of minority students on one hand. Today, minority enrollment is 76 percent and this educational melting pot is making national headlines. Named one of America’s top 10 high schools by Newsweek in 2010, it now boasts a cutting edge Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math (STEM) facility. Nearly half of all students are enrolled in advanced placement classes. Dorothy Jones is not surprised. She says she moved her family here in the 70s for a 2 6 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
better life. They lived right behind us and for most of my childhood they were the only African American family in the area. It was not always easy. “When I moved here, my children used to get on the bus every weekend to go back to their old neighborhood in Denver,” Dorothy says, adding they did make new friends because “young people notice race less than adults.” Don’t get me wrong. Discrimination is everywhere. Her daughter’s friend next door stopped playing with her after Dorothy says she overheard the mother asking her child, “Why do you want to
There are no census figures on the area’s LGBT community, but there’s no question the community here is expanding. With the high-end Stapleton development now moving into north Aurora, gays and lesbians are riding the wave into this eclectic neighborhood. Billy Rediess owns and operates Miters Touch, an exclusive, one-of-a-kind closet building and organizing company. After 30 years in Denver, he recently relocated his shop to Aurora. In addition to the lower rents, he says he’s finding a lot of work in Aurora’s growing number of “extremely high-end homes.” This includes the newer Wheatlands development in southeast Aurora. Billy says people here “will spend $5,000 on a master closet.” It would be easy for so many different people living side-by-side to have conflicts. Similar cities experience discrimination, fighting, even race wars. In Aurora, the tightly woven cultural mosaic is thriving. Everyone brings something valuable to the table. It’s paying off with good schools, good neighborhoods, a growing economy, and more and more people moving in to enjoy it.
PHOTO // RYAN MCGUIRE
The Bustling Mosaic We Never Saw Coming:
Our block, the one Dorothy still lives on, is now largely Russian. The most recent census figures show Aurora is at the center of Colorado’s refugee growth with a sizable population of people from Nepal, Ethiopia, and Eritrea. Hispanics also play a key role in the city’s growth. Over the last 20 years, they represent more than 70 percent of new people moving in. At this point, nearly 31 percent of people living in Aurora speak a second language.
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Native Kelly Morris Though the appearance of Nebraska left much to be desired, actual life there was great. I quickly learned that people took school very seriously and that ditching wasn’t an option, unlike in Golden. Sports and academics were taken very seriously, as well. I decided to stay in Nebraska for college. I went your typical midwestern route and joined a sorority, tailgated every Husker game (GO TEAM!), and had the greatest time. It was in college that I came to terms with the fact that I’ve never been interested in boys, and started to date another girl in my sorority. (Boys weren’t allowed upstairs after 10pm — talk about beating the system!) I kept it a secret for two years until my 21st birthday rolled around and so did the tequila shots. While I dreaded telling my moderately religious and extremely Republican friends, I found out that not only did they know by that point, but they didn’t care. And with that, I became the token lesbian friend that first exposed them (and their frat star boyfriends) to drag shows and fantastic nights.
You Can Take the Girl Out of CO, But... AT THE ANGSTY AGE OF 16, my parents decided to uproot me from all I knew and loved in Golden, CO, and toss me into the forgotten state of Nebraska.
Initially I hated the flatness of it all. Where are the mountains? How do people hike? Where do you snowboard? (Answer: In Iowa, on a hill that people have been brainwashed to think is a mountain). Humidity is something I had only heard rumors about but never experienced. The wetness of the state is something that still haunts me. If you even just think about stepping outside, you’re immediately drenched in sweat — places you didn’t even know could sweat. The upside? Brushing your hair is optional because no matter what you do, it’ll be 2 8 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
matted to your neck within minutes. With humidity comes bugs. Mosquitos gather by the trillions as do June bugs. June bugs are giant flying beetles who will smack their entire body into each window and door every few minutes all summer long — not just in June as their name deceptively implies.
My college town had one gay bar which also let in kids over the age of 18. This meant the gays were intermixed with highly intoxicated teenagers, and sometimes it was hard to tell who was who. When I moved back to Denver after college, I was shocked at how many gay bars there were (and fine, I became a regular at Charlie’s for a while due to the novelty of going to a bar where everyone is guaranteed to be at least 21). When I moved back to Denver, there was nothing about the actual state of Nebraska I missed. I love waking up knowing I can walk downtown or be in the mountains in 20 minutes, and I especially love waking up and not profusely sweating. I love that there are more than two Starbucks in this city. I love the absence of June bugs. I love not cow tipping. (Just joking. I never did that; it actually hurts cows.) Sure, I miss my friends, Husker games, and having rent that’s a third of what it is here, but this is one great state. And it’s home.
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An Open Letter to Colorado Natives Dear Natives, This is our city, too. We’ve loved in it, worked in it, walked our dogs in it; hell, we’ve even paid taxes in it. By all definitions — formal and informal — this city and state belongs to us. I speak for the thousands of migrants moving here looking for a change of pace. In fact, The Denver Post wrote recently about how “Colorado’s population jumped by 101,000 in 12 months” and I sympathize with the obvious reaction to that, I really do. The unequivocal response to the influx of people in Colorado should be: “What the hell! Stop moving here, please.” And it has. You know, I was listening to the radio a while ago when I was considering moving here, and I heard channel 93.3’s “lol, don’t move here” ad, which features an exclusiveness regarding the City of Denver and the State of Colorado. If you’re not familiar with it, a brief recapitulation goes like this: A calm and patronizing voice superimposed over the Lion King theme song (wherein Simba sees the land that is to be his inheritance) tells visitors and travelers currently in Colorado, not to move here.
We’re contributing to it and perpetuating a proverbial boom that makes the standard of living here one hundred times better. Restaurants do better with more people to eat, Lyft drivers do better with more people to lift, retail does better with more people to shop. The influx of people into Denver and the state of Colorado as a whole tunes into the ongoing and established cyclical nature of capitalistic America. Capitalism has its faults, but in its purest form (as exemplified by Denver in the now) it actually works and is beneficial to the backbone of the US, namely the middle class. Just think of the job growth here.
But, I want to speak up for the others like me (because, damn they’re everywhere) by saying that maybe it’s not so bad.
So, I’m standing up to the ads telling us not to move here and the negative vibes given by natives when they hear something along the lines of, “Oh yeah, I just moved here.”
Here’s why: The economy! The grand ol’ economy!
This is our city, too.
Yet here I am, 12 months later, living in the city, with my car registered here, and clogging up the space.
Transplant Akiva Weinstein 3 0 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
An Open Letter to Transplants I’m going to be frank with this one: We natives say things about transplants when you’re not in the room. Is it cowardly or courteous? We’d like to think the latter, but wouldn’t mind if you brought up the former so we could hash stuff out. Now, while my tone is a bit negative, you have to understand that we’ve gone from “Man, I don’t see how people could live with that kind of traffic!” while reading about rush-hour waits in big cities, to “Why the f*ck is 70 clogged on a Sunday?!” and noticing all the out-of-state tags on cars. But that’s just visitors, perhaps, or people so new, they haven’t changed their plates yet. Where the real aggravation comes in (and I hope you’ll forgive me to say it) is what this enormous migration has done to our laid-back homestead. Where once I could easily pull up a seat at my favorite watering hole, I’m having to elbow my way past the people who are vaping inside their jackets (that’s illegal, douchebags) to make it to the bar, where clear nonnatives are yelling to the bartender that they want Piss Water (read: Bud Light) and a lemon-drop. Your little California flip-flops are real swell, but you’re in Colorado: Drink good beer or get out of my favorite microbrew spot. Then there are those who complain that Denver isn’t “big enough.” Well, hell, City Slicker: We never claimed to be! We don’t have glittering towers with Trump all over them. We don’t have spinning signs announcing strippers and free drinks at craps tables. We don’t boast too many movie or radio stars, and we don’t have many celebrity sightings. But what we do have is a relaxed-pace environment where it’s ok to strike up a conversation with a stranger and not feel guilty for it. (At least we used to.) We natives feel our “overgrown cow-town” is a perfect fit, but if our modest amount of high-rises don’t fit your fancy, maybe reserve a U-Haul and find your perfect spot. Speaking of moving, I can’t tell you how many of my buddies have been priced out of their neighborhoods. It’s a damn shame, really, and though it’s not totally your fault, transplants, much of it is. Where Denver once used to be our beautiful secret, nobody will shut
the hell up about it and it’s no longer a secret. And though my libertarian leanings have me proud that we’ve given people the right to partake of marijuana, damned if I don’t see that it’s not all puppies and sunshine. It’s brought a lot of money, but it’s brought a lot of riff raff. Part of that riff raff is folks who are willing to pay $1900 for a studio in LoDo. Ridiculous. It’s getting to be too much and the natives have every right to be upset. Now, this letter isn’t to all transplants. I rather like what some of you bring to our table. This letter’s for the ones who come here and complain about what we have/don’t have, without taking the time to get to know the damn place. Then they call us the assholes for watching this city change like the face of a clock. Every damn minute, a new apartment building, a new string of cheap houses, torndown buildings that dump our memories into hauling bins and march them clean out of the city. And what’s left? It’s hardly recognizable anymore. But like I say, it’s not all of you … just the entitled whiners I’m talking about. Let’s just put it like this: You’re more than welcome to my house, but wipe your damn feet before you come in and don’t complain about the furniture.
Native Wesley Smith OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 31
With your host, Native Rick Kitzman
Now It’s Time For: “What Was There?” I’VE BEEN LUCKY TO LIVE 54 OF 62 YEARS IN COLORADO, ALWAYS WITHIN EASY ACCESS OF DYNAMIC DENVER. DRIVING THROUGH ITS CONGESTED, EVER-CHANGING ENVIRONS, I PLAY A MEMORY GAME: “WHAT WAS THERE?” THE APARTMENT, near 20th and Lincoln was once a 70s 3.2 gay bar, my baptismal visit accompanied by prophetic O’Jays.
Tracks, this space is now LoDo condos and high-rises, its sister occupying another neighborhood acronym, RiNo.
BACKSTABBERS and the Three Degrees’ Dirty Old
1910 manufacturing plant where my dad worked during World War II is now a modern, global headquarters, an RTD transportation hub, residences, and businesses.
Men? Now a cement triangle.
BALLPARK BATHHOUSE, BROADWAY AND BAYAUD was Denver’s 1976 icon (the two-story waterfall!) in the Baker neighborhood. Now it’s an empty lot and next door, Kitty’s, a $2.6 million prime real estate purchase.
BONFILS THEATRE ON COLFAX — Built in 1953 by philanthropist Helen Bonfils and an ancestor of the Denver Center for Performing Arts, it’s now the Tattered Cover, a great example of revitalizing city treasures.
CELEBRITY LANES AND COOPER THEATER, Colorado Blvd. near Kentucky Ave. — Epitomes of mid-century architecture, an 80-lane bowling sports center and Cinerama movie house, they’re now Homo Depot and Whole-Paycheck Foods, not nearly as much fun.
ELITCH’S THEATRE, 38th and Tennyson — Last remaining structure of the 1890’s entertainment park, based on Shakespeare’s Globe and where Sarah Bernhardt performed, it’s now surrounded by redevelopment, the park relocated to Speer Boulevard, an over-priced transmutation.
FITZSIMONS ARMY MEDICAL CENTER — A 1918 facility to treat war casualties, it’s now the Anschutz Medical Center, a 577 acre mini-city and future home of the billion dollar boondoggle Veteran’s Hospital.
THE FOX HOLE, 29th Avenue and Fox Street — An outdoor summer party scene across from the 1980’s 3 2 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
GATES RUBBER COMPANY, South Broadway — A
In the 60s, it was an amusing tour of drunks and dives. Now it’s trendy bars that still serve drunks — just after a Rockies game.
LARIMER STREET — In the 60s, it was an amusing tour of drunks and dives. Now it’s trendy bars that still serve drunks — just after a Rockies game.
LOWRY AIR FORCE BASE — An 1880’s military installation that was still functioning in the 50s when my brother flew to Alaska after joining the Army, this place is now redeveloped with two hangars preserved for the Wings Over the Rockies Air and Space Museum.
PUBLIC ART — A century of ugly, boring space now has an imaginative Little Horse Big Chair galloping onto the Denver Public Library; a curious, giant blue bear peeking into the Convention Center; Darth Vader’s blue mustang spooking state visitors; and the Alien Q-Tip Couple (my title) on Speer Boulevard taking top spot for ridiculous waste of taxpayer money. STAPLETON AIRPORT — A fifteen minute drive from downtown, this space is now “Gaypleton” and stands on former tarmacs where high-school crush Gary and I parked to drink beer and watch jets land near enough to scratch their bellies.
THE TRIANGLE, 20th and Broadway — This was a 70s watering hole for butch boys where I sought solace when Ft. Collins’ Ordinance 22 — adding sexual
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orientation to the non-discrimination laws — failed miserably, and 22 days after Matthew Shepard died from injuries that made him look like a scarecrow. It’s now unoccupied, but assimilated into the money-crazed real estate boom.
THREE SISTERS, Highlands — Affectionately nicknamed “Six Tits,” this 70s lesbian bar was where my high-school drama teacher/mentor snuck me in, and forced to hide me under a table. It’s now a home seller’s dream and buyer’s nightmare.
TOP OF THE ROCKIES, 17th and Glenarm — A 60s skyscraping restaurant with stunning views from the Security Life building (where I wined and dined my prom date with Coke) is now repurposed condos where residents dine “al fresco” in what was the shaft of its outside glass elevator.
UNIVERSITY OF COLORADO MEDICAL CENTER, 9th and Colorado Blvd. — Eleven blocks of medical services, the last chunk of land to develop within city limits, is now transitioning to urban use, abuzz with bulldozers across the street from my home. Ugh!
SATURDAY, JUNE 4TH 6:30PM & 9PM
UPTOWN VILLAGE, 17th and Logan — Mid-80s investment to revitalize a dicey neighborhood, my one-bedroom apartment renting for $450. Now rent pushes $1,800 but with a vivid pedestrian life.
ZECKENDORF PLAZA, 16th and Court Place — Before 16th Street was a mall and a bus driver’s nightmare, this was a 60s ice-skating rink with an adjoining hyperbolic paraboloid designed by architect I. M. Pei, symbols of Denver’s emerging modern architecture. Now, the Sheraton Hotel’s boring entrance with praying mantises (bronze ballerinas) serves as symbols of this native’s anger over unconscionable destruction and greedy out-of-towners. Oh, look! New construction. I wonder what was there ...
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Technical Transplant Chris Arneson
to join. But I agree and move on. I moved to Colorado right before the green rush for a job in the performing arts. (Denver’s got a killer theatre scene, btw.) After squatting in an empty house in Brighton for a few months, I landed myself a home — a studio apartment directly on the edges of Downtown, Uptown, and Cap Hill. An awesome part of my escape was this gay culture I’d never experienced. It was in my neighborhood. It was at my job. There were actual groups of homosexuals just doing their thing. It wasn’t unheard of in my hometown, but for only being a few miles away, it felt like thousands.
(Oh, sorry. Should I go home?) I GREW UP ABOUT 90 MILES NORTH in Cheyenne, directly on the Wyoming border. Like, if you take the first exit into the city, my parents’ house is just down the road. If I was really dedicated, I could’ve biked to Colorado. Before I moved here, I used to trek down after work to see weeknight shows and still make it back home by midnight. My schools used to take field trips to Denver. I’ve wanted to be a part of this city since I was a kid. 3 4 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
So when new friends ask if I’m a native, it’s understandable that I stumble a bit. But once I explain my journey, it’s usually met with, “Oh, so you’re basically a native.” Like I’m being accepted into this club I never asked
I was barely in my new city for a year before the rest of the country decided they should be, too. And apparently they’re much richer than I am. I was here early enough to understand “how it used to be,” and I too went on tiny tirades about these trend-whores invading our oasis. Of course it’s frustrating to see your rent skyrocket. To have your commute to work be suddenly double congested. To apply for 10 jobs a day and hear nothing back. Hitting a rut in a city that used to be so comfortable is kinda scary. But whose fault is it, really? Can you blame the people who found out how great this place is where you already happened to be? Are we really the kind of society where we get to be dicks to the new kid in school? Maybe Denver gets to be their escape, too. Maybe they weren’t so lucky to grow up in an exciting city. It’s sort of cool to be at the forefront of a movement. (But congratulations on never making it out of your hometown.)
PHOTO // RYAN MCGUIRE
Hey, My Name is Chris and I’m Not a Colorado Native
The neighborhood felt like a charming melting pot. I was paying less than $600 and could walk to work. It’s easy to see why once legal weed was added to the equation, Denver exploded … as did my rent.
DENVER
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COORS LIGHT PRIDEFEST PARADE SUNDAY, JUNE 19 AT 9:30 AM Cheesman to Civic Center via Colfax
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Native Mike Yost
not a bad thing. But I witnessed a lot of blatant xenophobia. It’s a great place to live if you’re a straight, white male. To everyone else ... did I already mention the Waffle Houses? Utah: An orgy of ski resorts and Mormons. They even have a skier (who is Mormon) on their license plate. “The greatest snow on Earth” their license plate reads. I call bullshit on that bold claim — not only is Colorado’s snow virginal, it actually contains high levels of THC. They do have Zion National Park, and there are slurries of sexy Mormon missionaries trying to convert you. They were always kind to me and even have shirtless calendars (I shit you not). But I witnessed a lot of inconspicuous xenophobia. It’s a great place to live if you’re a straight, white male. To everyone else ... did I already mention the orgy of ski resorts?
Compared to Colorado ... GREETINGS TRANSPLANTS! You’ve successfully uprooted your lives
from all those other states I know almost nothing about — except through rumor and hearsay. (Is there really such a thing as “California English”? And does the Lone Star state really execute people who “Mess with Texas”?) At any rate, welcome to the Centennial State, where the nickname comes not from the state’s founding in 1876, but from a little-known state law requiring Coloradans to be euthanized when they’re 100 years old. (Think about it: Have you ever seen anyone in Colorado over 100? I haven’t, and I’ve eaten at Red Lobster.) I’m a Colorado kid, born and raised and brewed deep in the pure, virginal snows of the majestic Rocky Mountains. (Pro tip: we just call them “the mountains.”) Like the cast of Game of Thrones, 3 6 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
Oregon: This state’s got the motherf*cking Pacific Ocean! Colorado may have some awesome lakes ... but Oregon has a motherf*cking lake in the caldera of a motherf*cking volcano. There’s also fresher than fresh seafood. Rain. Rain. More rain. They’re a bit militant about recycling, and they will body-check you into your vehicle if you try to pump your own gas. I witnessed a lot of conspicuous acceptance. It’s a great place to live for just about everyone ... well, unless you’re a militia man occupying Malheur National Wildlife Refuge. Hoth: Screw this place. Too f*cking cold all the time. The local wildlife smells awful. And commuting around AT-AT Walkers is a bitch, as those asshole rebel fighters never check their crossfire. F*ck Hoth.
there are still some of us natives left from season one. And like sexy Tyrion Lannister, I’ve traveled Middle Earth from Hogwarts to Hoth, and I’d like to reflect on the cultures and people who populate this fine country of ‘Merica.
Anyhow, welcome transplants. Yes, you’ll use your heat and A/C on the same day (the same morning). Yes, we’re all better drivers than everyone else in the entire world. No, we’re not high all the time.
Mississippi: Hot and humid as opposed to Colorado’s, “It’s just dry heat.” More potholes per block than Colfax Avenue. They do have the gulf, but the water is brown (I shit you not). They know how to properly make fried okra and grits, and they have more Waffle Houses than we have dispensaries, which is
cough And please don’t ta — cough cough And please don’t take it personally when we lament about the skyrocketing rent. I know it could be worse, and we could be living in the costly city of San Francisco ... where I’m told you all came from.
WRANGLER 20TH ANNIVERSARY Despite the cold weather, drizzle, and light snow, a capacity crowd helped the Denver Wrangler celebrate its 20th Anniversary on April 29th. Ten die-hard exhibitionists donned their boxers, briefs, thongs, and jockstraps for the annual wet underwear contest in hopes of winning one of the cash prizes for the first, second, and third place finishers. Later this summer the Wrangler celebrates another milestone when they relocate into their own building at 30th and Downing. Photos by Charles Broshous
CHINA THE KINETIC
China is an affectionate and energetic girl! She would do well in an active home, with lots of love and attention! She would do best in a home without cats and in a community without breed restrictions.
GYPSY ROSE THE FREE SPIRIT Meet Gypsy Rose, a lover of treats and spending time with people. She is a great dog who already knows basic commands. Gypsy Rose would do best in a home without other dogs. Please come meet this unique sweetie.
n Brewing at Declaratio Yappy Hour May 26, 2016 ing from claration Brew 16 Yappy Join us at De 20 r ou to off e kick trucks, od 6–8PM for th fo be ill There w ing, and Hour Series. aw dr ize music, a pr ewery br e live acoustic Th ses for sale. new pint glas y beer sold er ev of % 10 ting ue. will be dona Friends Leag to the Dumb St 80 S. Quebec DDFL.org | 20 2 77 1-5 75 ) (303
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CHARLIE’S LOOKS BACK ON MORE THAN THREE DECADES OF BUSINESS Chris Arneson CHARLIE’S DENVER IS CELEBRATING 35 YEARS THIS JUNE, AND THE quaint Colfax cowboy bar still prides itself on a down-home atmosphere with a touch of neon. Their anniversary weekend, which kicks off Friday, June 3, plans to bring in headliners like out country singer Ty Herndon and comedian/singer Amy Armstrong. Herndon will be performing on Friday and Armstrong on Saturday. Both nights will feature free drinks from 6–7pm with the headliners appearing right after in the parking lot. Sunday night, as usual, will feature Kai Lee’s Kiki at 9:30pm, hosted weekly by Kai Lee Mykels. Armstrong will also be featured that evening along with Phoenix’s drag diva Pussy Le Hoot. Kai Lee’s Kiki will also feature house queens like Alyssa Love, Mile High Pinky Pie, Venus Sexton and newcomer Khloe Katz along with other performers the queens invite to share the floor. Brendan Sullivan, general manager of Charlie’s Denver, said patrons should expect entertainment, specials, and quality service throughout the weekend. Founder John King, who’s currently based out of their Phoenix location, will be around throughout the week to commemorate three-and-a-half decades of his establishment. King opened up at a first location in Denver in 1981 on East Colfax between Trenton and Tamarac streets. It stayed until 1989, when he was able to secure a spot closer to downtown. “We’d always been trying to move downtown,” King recalls. They had tried to purchase the Golden Ox in 1985, but at that time, Capitol Hill United Neighborhood Inc. (CHUN) was not ready to accept Charlie’s. By 1988, CHUN reversed its stance and welcomed the gay bar a little closer west on Colfax and Emerson. 3 8 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
The legacy of Charlie’s, a fine hybrid of drag queens and stag fiends, where you can line-dance beneath the sparkle of an illustrious disco-boot, is still country strong.
Charlie’s expanded to its Phoenix location in 1984, and locations in Chicago and more recently Las Vegas have been incorporated since. King, who’s lived in Phoenix since that location opened, decided to set up the corporate office there. But King didn’t move away from Denver because he didn’t like it, he moved away because he’s a warm-weather person. “Denver’s always been good to me,” King explains, “but once I got to Phoenix, I couldn’t quite get the motivation to go back to Denver.” King says get a few shots of tequila in him, and he’ll talk for hours about his bar. Like how he named the bar for his then-boyfriend. The name was supposed to be the High Plains, since the original location was so close to Aurora, all his friends referred to it as being “out on the plains somewhere.” Charlie’s wasn’t chosen as the official name until about a week before opening. King had noticed a lot of popular country songs had featured the name during that era, and it seemed friendly. It just worked out that his boyfriend happened to have that name, too. “When we broke up, Charlie didn’t know I’d bought the name,” King remembers. One of the last stipulations of their divorce, per the real Charlie, was the name of the bar would have to be changed. In what he calls classic gay style, King told him, “I own the name Charlie’s in Colorado, but you can change your name to whatever you want.” And the legacy of Charlie’s, a fine hybrid of drag queens and stag fiends, where you can line-dance beneath the sparkle of an illustrious disco-boot, is still country strong. CharliesDenver.com
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DENVER, WHAT’S YOUR OBSESSION WITH BAREBACK SEX? Ryan Howe DENVER HAS A PROBLEM. If you check any of the hook up apps, the amount of men in the area searching to “breed” or have anonymous bareback sex is insane. This is a problem. Let’s take you back to high school sex education class. Most of us didn’t get the gay sex talk, and had to turn to the internet or our own experiences to learn about it. But that class most likely gave you the best bit of information when it comes to sexual partners. When you have sex with someone, you’re exposing yourself to every other person that he has slept with. So if a trick was posted up at the Denver Swim Club, letting anyone cumdump him, then drove to your house to let you do the same, you’re exposing yourself to a number of diseases. Some of those diseases will stick with you for the rest of your life. So, you trust that someone who has a disease would tell you? You’re wrong. Let’s talk about HIV as an example. You are most likely to get HIV
4 0 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
from someone who doesn’t know they have it. At least 20 percent of those with HIV in the US don’t know they have it. Not to mention, it’s incredibly easy to lie to someone through the little yellow speech bubbles on Grindr. But wait, you’re on PrEP? That’s great! You’re taking the steps to protect yourself from a virus that nearly wiped out an entire generation of our predecessors. But what about everything else floating around in your trick’s system? There is a time and a place to partake in bareback sex. No, it’s not in a sling at a sex party. Reserve it for someone you completely trust. And fun fact, if this person you trust is HIV+ you can still have unprotected sex with them, as long as his viral load is undetectable, according to AIDSMap. If anything, as single men, we’re allowed to be selfish. We have to put ourselves first, and not the random trick who can’t get hard wearing a condom. Respect your body, fellas.
2017 COLORADO FIREFIGHTER CALENDAR TRYOUTS The 2017 Colorado Firefighter Calendar tryouts were held at the EXDO Event Center on May 7th. Twenty-four firefighters competed for a coveted spot in next year’s beefcake-style calendar by answering questions in their dress uniforms and parading across the stage in part of their bunker gear. Calendar models volunteer their time to raise funds, attend events, educate children, and increase awareness for burn centers around the state. Net proceeds from the sale of calendars and special events benefit the Children’s Hospital Burn Center and other centers across the state. Photos by Charles Broshous
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H E I N Z ES I G H T
QUESTIONABLE RELATIONSHIP INVESTMENTS Transplant Brent Heinze, Senior Columnist HEY, BRENT. I’VE BEEN DATING THIS GUY FOR QUITE A WHILE AND I’M REALLY TORN. I SEE SO MUCH POTENTIAL IN HIM AS A POSSIBLE BOYFRIEND, BUT HE CONTINUALLY LETS ME DOWN AND DOES THINGS THAT CAUSE ME TO WANT TO RUN AWAY. WHEN THINGS ARE GOOD, THEY’RE REALLY GREAT. WHEN THINGS ARE BAD, THEY’RE ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE. WE CAN KEEP WORKING ON ISSUES THAT CAUSE CONFLICT WITH US, BUT I’M NOT SURE IT WILL BE WORTH IT IN THE LONG RUN. WE SEEM TO HAVE THE SAME TYPES OF ARGUMENTS OVER AND OVER. HOW DO I DECIDE IF WORKING ON OUR ISSUES IS WORTHWHILE? Many of us welcome people into our lives for a variety of benefits. Some are there to increase feelings of connection by offering friendship, camaraderie, and activity partners, while others offer romantic or sexual frivolity and the potential for a committed relationship. Depending on what outcomes we desire, the amount of crap we put up with may vary. The more we convince ourselves that we really want something, we risk pushing ourselves past where we’re comfortable to get it. Think about the ridiculous notion of continuing to feed money into a Skittles dispenser that only gives you a few pieces of candy instead of a handful. It’s frustrating because we want more. Hopefully, you’ll realize that you’re feeding change into this malfunctioning machine and hope it will spontaneously start working correctly. Your time may be better spent sticking your money somewhere else to get more candy. One of the more confusing situations in any type of relationship is when it works well part of the time, but your success doesn’t come as often as you want. The payoffs can be great when it 4 2 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
It can be difficult to walk away when we feel a large investment of time or money has been placed into people or situations. works, but there are many times where you’re left feeling cheated and disappointed. You have the option of continuing to work on getting more of what you want and struggle with the desire to give up on this one to move on to someone else that has a higher potential for success. It can be difficult to walk away when we feel a large investment of time or money has been placed into people or situations. You may also struggle with feelings of failure by cutting your losses and moving on to something else. It is important to recognize when your investment is not working out in the ways you desired and consider moving on to another opportunity. Although difficult, it may be in your best interest. Chalking these types of experiences up to a learning opportunity can be beneficial, but also difficult to stomach. Some lessons are more expensive than others to learn. Any good financial advisor will warn us to do our research before investing in something, no matter how attractive their description or portfolio seems. After a while, their performance may not live up to what you were told and promises of improvement may seem more of a fantasy than reality. After you complete your analysis of your investment, you may decide to continue pumping resources into it or decide to dump it and sell, sell, sell! Take some time and consider if the good things about your situation outweigh the concerning aspects. Remember that change can be slow going and may not happen fast enough for you. Be careful not to give up too soon, but aware enough to know when you’re sinking your funds into a crappy investment.
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TOWN HALL TO STAGE: LEGALLY BLONDE THE MUSICAL SUMMER IN DENVER KICKS OFF WITH A little ‘bend and snap’ Broadway production. Legally Blonde the Musical, opening May 20, is based on the popular 2001 film which made a star of Reese Witherspoon as the quintessential sorority girl Elle Woods, played by Rachelle Wood in the musical.
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This fabulously fun, international award-winning musical follows Woods’ newlyfound, law filled life as she tackles stereotypes, snobbery, and scandal in pursuit of her dreams and an unyielding desire to win back her old love Warner (Tim Oakes). Legally Blonde is known for its witty dialog, entertaining musical score and lively choreography. Trust us when we say you won’t want to miss this. But, it’s going to make you ‘want a hotdog real bad!’ “We are really excited about this show,” Leslie Rutherford, Town Hall Arts Center Marketing & PR Director, said. “It will be the perfect end to a great season and a lovely way to kick off the summer.” This production may wrap up Town Hall Arts Center’s 20152016 season, but is almost up-staged by their next blockbuster musical season, which kicks off in September and includes Once Upon a Mattress, A Christmas Story the Musical, Avenue Q, Bonnie & Clyde, The Robber Bridegroom, and Hairspray. Town Hall’s production of Legally Blonde runs through Sunday, June 19. (303) 794-2787; TownHallArtsCenter.com 4 6 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
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H EA LT H
COULD WESTWARD MIGRATION MEAN STI ACCUMULATION? Transplant Stephen M. Small, PharmD THE FRONT RANGE’S GROWING POPULATION COULD CERTAINLY mean crazier traffic, higher rental rates, and a lot more cannabis sales in the future. But we’re curious: Could this same trend apply to sexually transmitted infections (STIs) in Colorado? Denver’s booming population has been a frequent topic of discussion in the media, with special focus on the city’s surge in young professionals. I myself am a member of this invading group. When picking where to live after pharmacy school, I remember looking at a magazine article listing the year’s top ten cities for new college graduates. Near the top of the list was Denver, being athletic, educated, and welcomingly gay. I was smitten, as I’m sure most transplants are when they enter this beautiful state. However, could this massive arrival of my lustful peers signal the warning bells for an rise in STI infections? After all, men and women between the ages of 18 and 24 are the most affected by STIs, and more young people could mean more sex. To help answer this question, I spoke with Rebecca Jordan-Yehle, Program Manager for the STI/HIV/Viral Hepatitis Branch at the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment (CDPHE). According to Rebecca, Colorado actually compares favorably to the nation in terms of its infection rates. “STI rates are increasing nationally,” she says. “Our increases don’t match the nation’s — it’s actually smaller overall.” Although our trends are increasing along with the rest of the country, the magnitude has less of a relative impact here. Despite the fact that our area is experiencing an increase in both population and STI rates, it’s pretty difficult to determine 4 8 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
Could this massive arrival of my lustful peers signal the warning bells for an rise in STI infections?
whether these two variables are truly interconnected. She put it simply: “We’re talking about human behavior that is always dynamic and complex.” As such, there are many factors that could explain our state’s uptick in STIs. As she points out, increased testing could be just one of many possible reasons for the increased number of infection diagnoses in Colorado. Therefore, it’s almost impossible for CDPHE to hazard a prediction regarding the effect our population boom could have in the future. Whether or not our population expansion has an effect, she makes an excellent point about how to keep ourselves safe. “It’s up to each of us to individually know what level of risk we are putting ourselves at for STIs,” she says. “If you are engaging in behaviors that put you at risk, you need to think about ways to prevent getting an infection.” This means using condoms, communication, PrEP, or other methods to stop infections before they start. Thankfully, Rebecca and her colleagues at the CDPHE continually collect in-depth records on Colorado’s STI rates. “In the next two to three months,” she reports, “the five-year trending tables will be available online,” giving the department a chance to review the STI data and look for any long-term patterns. Maybe they’ll find a correlation between our population increase and STI rates, maybe they won’t. But in the meantime, it’s important to protect ourselves and consider welcoming the new members of our Colorado family with open arms.
DENVER PROFESSIONAL MEN’S CLUB The Denver Professional Men’s Club held their monthly happy hour at Earl’s on May 6th. Approximately 40 people came out to the eatery on the 16th Street Mall for drinks, hors d’oeuvres and a little socializing. The DPMC provides social activities for its members with a happy hour and one other social event each month. For more information, visit their website at DPMC.org. Photos by Charles Broshous
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BAR TAB
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DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: BE MORE PESSIMISTIC Native Mike Yost WE’VE ALL HEARD THAT TRITE, SOUR PLATITUDE: “WHEN LIFE gives you lemons, make lemonade!” Making lemonade might work when you’re dumped (now you can go to that orgy!), or when you get a traffic ticket (you’re donating to the city’s infrastructure!), or when you lose your job (time for that career change you’ve dreamed about). But life is so much more nuanced. Making lemonade is repugnant advice when someone you love commits suicide, or when a parent is diagnosed with terminal brain cancer, or when you lose your job (I was working in my dream career). And depression is immune to these banal quips. “It could always be worse!” It doesn’t make me feel any better knowing someone is suffering more than I am. I’d rather listen to more morose, authentic thinkers who embrace despair as an essential part of life. The philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer argued that life is a choice between suffering and boredom, and that existence itself is a cosmic blunder. “We can regard our life as a uselessly disturbing episode in the blissful repose of nothingness.” Or the Übermensch himself, Friedrich Nietzsche, who lauded the idea of suicide as a means of comfort. “The thought of suicide is a great consolation. By means of it, one gets through many a dark night.” My favorite quote comes from the French philosopher, Jean-Paul Sartre. “Act without hope.” These exclamations of hopelessness are ironically ... hopeful. I can’t count the number of times the idea of being a writer seemed futile. Those days in college when one of my stories was torn to shreds by the class and the professor. The constant stream of rejection letters filling my inbox. Watching my fellow classmates get published. Hell, even now as I draft this article, sitting in a booth in the corner of an almost-empty restaurant, I feel despondent — I’m on my 10th cup of coffee. It’s gloomy and rainy outside, and this article is currently a muddled mess of sentence fragments, run-ons, and half-coherent ideas rattling around in my skull, all loosely held together on the computer screen with copious amounts of digital duct tape. Life’s feeling pretty hopeless at the moment: This article will never get finished. I’ll miss the deadline. Even if it’s printed, readers will tell me it’s garbage. What the hell am I doing with my life?
However ... if you’re currently reading this article, then I did hit the deadline. The editor didn’t print out my work and light it on fire in the middle of OUT FRONT’s office.* Hopefully I’m not getting messages from readers that it’s garbage. But instead of running away from my hopelessness, I stand my ground and give it the finger, continuing to write, edit, and rewrite — all while violently punching my keyboard and drinking 10 more cups of coffee. For me, it helps to embrace this pessimistic perspective with depression. I push forward without the expectation that things will get better, with the knowledge that we’re nothing but star dust floating aimlessly in a vast universe. That everyone we love will die and be forgotten. No, I shake my fist at the sky as the storm rolls in, knowing the deluge will sweep me out to sea. In a phrase, f*ck hope. I’ll cultivate contentment out of hopelessness, foster fortitude out of depression, and try to live my life as much as I can until the deadline. *Editor here: Mike, I’d never burn your work, buddy, and no one has dared say a cross word to me about the heart you pour onto our pages each issue. We love you, dude. Keep ’em coming. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 51
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CHOCOLATE-FUDGE PROTEIN BARS (GLUTEN-FREE & PALEO)
TOP 5 SUGGESTIONS WHEN SNACKING Blythe Alberg, Sports Nutritionist at Matrix Fitness & Spa KEEP ONLY HEALTHY SNACKING FOODS IN STOCK. Research shows that having junk food in the house leads to junk-food snacking. Keeping healthy snacks like fresh cut veggies on hand promotes better snacking! DON’T SKIP YOUR REGULAR MEALS, AVOID THE BINGE. There are times when we just don’t feel hungry. Scientific studies show that skipping meals leads to excessive binging. KEEP FRUIT READILY AVAILABLE. This helps you make a better choice when craving something sweet. SKIP OUT ON THE CALORIE-HEAVY DRINKS. Make a lateral shift by selecting a lite version of your favorite beverage. This can help keep your waistline under control. MAKE YOUR OWN! Making your own treats (such as the recipe at right) from my Fit Life with Blythe Healthy Recipe Book make sure you don’t undo your hard-earned gym time! 5 2 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
WHAT YOU WILL NEED: 1 (14oz) can coconut milk (I use the whole-fat version for better consistency) 4 ½ tbsp pure cocoa powder ¼ cup organic cane sugar or raw sugar 1 tbsp gelatin collagen hydrolysate (powdered formula, easier to digest) ¼ cup gelatin (powdered plain, you can find at the health food store) ¼ tsp salt 1 tsp vanilla extract DIRECTIONS: In a mixer, blender, or food processor, combine all ingredients except gelatin. Slowly add the gelatin while blender is running to avoid any clumping. Put in saucepan, over medium heat. While stirring constantly, bring to a boil, then immediately remove from heat. Grease a 9x9 baking dish with extra virgin coconut oil. Pour gelatin mixture and let cool 1–2 hours in the fridge until firmly set.
Cut into 9 protein bars, and store in the fridge. Will keep for about 4–7 days. NOTE: There are two different kinds of gelatin in this recipe. One makes the mixture gel (plain gelatin, Great Lakes brand, green container), and the collagen hydrolysate, used as added protein (easier to digest, Great Lakes brand, red container). I prefer to use a combination of both to increase protein.
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DON’T CHEAT! TREAT CHEATING IS TYPICALLY A NASTY WORD, BE IT IN SCHOOL, IN A relationship, or sporting match. But how about a diet? The term “cheat day” has been thrown about by trainers and nutritionists alike, with many debating whether these indulgent days are good or bad for your overall health goals. Some even debate the word “cheat” itself, opting instead to use the more positively associated “treat day” instead. So, what does the research say? In a study published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology, researchers looked at how well “hedonic deviations” — oh, such a naughty phrase! — helped when striving to accomplish an overall goal, be it financial or health related. The study, covered by a variety of publications including Elle, The Atlantic, and CBS (with the deceptive headline, Study Proves Eating Pizza Could Help You Lose Weight), showed that having a diet regimen with “planned goal deviations” could help you maintain your motivation and will to live (my words), contributing to long term success. In the course of three experiments, researchers first had a group of 36 participants split into two, with one group imagining being on a 1500-calorie diet for seven days and another imagining a 1300-calorie diet for six days, with a 2700-calorie cheat day 5 4 M AY 1 8 , 2 0 1 6
every week. With visions of pizza buffets dancing in their heads (this time I’m imagining), the group with the cheat day said they would most likely have more self-control and resist temptations, even though their diet was technically harder. Scientists then put the group on the diets for two weeks and found that those with the cheat day said they were able to have more self-control, compared to those on the diet that didn’t have a cheat day. The study concluded that it might be good to “occasionally be bad, as long as it is planned.” Having something to look forward was shown to help the overall goal, according to the study, as well as avoid a “failure cascade” that leads you to polish off an entire bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups when you were just reaching for one. So go bananas — or more accurately, go banana split or chocolate-dipped bananas — but, you know, within moderation. As Carissa Bealert, registered dietitian/nutritionist says in a recent GQ article, just because it’s a cheat (or treat!) day doesn’t mean it’s an “all-you-can-eat binge meal.” Have your cake and eat it too — just not the whole thing.
PHOTO // RYAN MCGUIRE
Kelsey Lindsey
Having something to look forward was shown to help the overall goal, according to the study, as well as avoid a “failure cascade” that leads you to polish off an entire bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.
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BISEXUAL DATING IN DENVER [WARNING: GRAPHIC]
Transplant Vanessa Williams I MOVED TO DENVER WHILE IN AN OFF-BEAT MARRIAGE THAT ENDED shortly after we arrived. I was initially bummed, but the thought of dating again woke something in me. I’m closing in on year two of being single and I find myself asking, “Hey, Denver: Where the hoes at?” Because in all seriousness, I can’t seem to find them. When I go out in Denver, no one talks to anyone but the people they came with! I’ve never seen this before in my life. So I’ve turned to online dating. Full disclosure, I’m a bisexual woman, and I think this is a part of my challenge. I like to think that people are able to live and think outside of stereotypes, but ... My online dating profiles — while they get tons of traction — seem to afford me ten messages a day of men asking me, “So do you even like men?” I don’t understand why men assume “bisexual” somehow means “I don’t like men.” I’ve explained several times that it means I’m equal opportunity for either a man or woman who tickles my fancy. All the other girls listed as bisexual seem to be super closeted or just curious. They usually have a boyfriend who has no idea they are scamming for chicks online, or they have a boyfriend who has them out scouting for ladies to join them in a three-way. And the lesbians are kind of like, “Oh, so you f*ck men? Ew.” I’ve also noticed that women wait for me to make the first move; I almost never get a message from the other girl first. Dating has never been this weird anywhere else — no one here seems to understand the concept of being bisexual. Apparently, I don’t look gay enough out on the street for women to approach me. I’ve been told I don’t look bisexual, and I have no idea how to fix that. So recently, I took to swiping one night and came across a pretty cute bearded fellow. I swiped right — a match! Shortly after, I got a message from him that said, “Yum.” One of my favorite pastimes is engaging in ridiculous conversations with people online, so I struck up the following:
*
So this guy, we’ll call him Potatoes for the sake of anonymity, was into it, and very confident in his abilities. I told him that hooking up with me would likely ruin his whole life (gotta match cocky with cocky, right?). He told me he could blow my mind with two words: “I’m bisexual.” I’ve never dated a bisexual man but I’m not opposed to it. We ended up texting and I quickly received about ten unsolicited pictures of his penis — not that impressive. I actually ended up with a video of him jerking — also unrequested. That might be hot to a gay man, but not really the stuff that gets a lady wet. He asked me all kinds of questions about myself, some sexual/some normal. My rule is, I do nothing that could land me on an episode of Law and Order: SVU. The conversation was amusing ... until he started talking about how how hot it is to hear about other people getting with their relatives. He later admitted that he’d fooled around with his own father, and it was his idea. He had sex with his cousin, and came close to sex with his aunt. That’s not being bisexual, that’s just … definitely something else. Anyway, I stopped responding. This wasn’t even amusing anymore. To be honest, Denver, I don’t even know if I care where your hoes are. I think I should just adopt some cats and start knitting ugly things for my friends and forcing them to wear them in public.
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