August 3, 2016 :: The DIY Issue

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AUGUST 03 , 2016 | OUTFRONTONLINE .COM | FREE



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CONTENTS AUGUST 03, 2016 VOL40 NO08

20 08 PROTECTING THE RIGHTS OF TRANSGENDER PEOPLE STARTS BUT DOES NOT END WITH QUALITY HEALTHCARE

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10 CU INTRODUCES AN LGBT-FOCUSED MENTAL HEALTH CLINIC

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16 HOUSE COMMITTEE HOLDS HEARING ON ANTI-LGBT FADA LEGISLATION 22 HOW TO BE FABULOUS FOR CHEAP 30 HOW TO FIT THE THIRD 34 CALENDAR 44 HEINZESIGHT 46 DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: WASTE MORE TIME 50 ASK A SLUT

ON THE COVER

Photo Illustration by Nadya Lyapunova

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SERVING THE LGBT COMMUNITY OF THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS SINCE 1976 PHONE (%("),,")%%% FAX 303-325-2642 WEB OutFrontOnline.com FACEBOOK /OutFrontColorado TWITTER @OutFrontCO INSTAGRAM /OutFrontColorado FOUNDER PHIL PRICE 1954-1993 ADMINISTRATION info@outfrontonline.com JERRY CUNNINGHAM Publisher J.C. MCDONALD Vice President MAGGIE PHILLIPS Operations Manager JEFF JACKSON SWAIM Chief Strategist EDITORIAL editorial@outfrontonline.com BERLIN SYLVESTRE Editor RYAN HOWE Digital Content Manager BRENT HEINZE Senior Columnist CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Christina Aguilar, Paul Bindel, Chad Chisholm, Evelyn Franco, Mike Halterman, Austin Montoya, Wesley Smith, A.J. Smuskiewicz, Addison Herron-Wheeler, Yvonne Wright, Mike Yost, The Cycle Sluts ART art@outfrontonline.com TRISHA HIMMLER Art Director NADYA LYAPUNOVA Graphic Intern CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Charles Broshous, Chad Chisholm MARKETING + SALES marketing@outfrontonline.com DUSTIN KRIER Director of Sales & Marketing TOPHER LA FLEUR Marketing Executive KELSEY NOLAN Marketing Executive NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media 212-242-6863 | sales@rivendellmedia.com DISTRIBUTION

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IN CASE YOU

MISSED IT THE HOTTEST STORIES ON OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

ALLEGED GRINDR KILLER CHARGED WITH EIGHT MORE ATTACKS Stephen Port, the man charged for the alleged murders of four gay men in London last year, is now facing eight more charges of rape and poisoning after more victims stepped forward and reported attacks. Last year, Port was arrested after being accused of using Grindr to murder four men with lethal doses of GHB. The bodies of all four victims, Anthony Patrick Walgate, 23, Gabriel Kovari, 22, Daniel Whitworth, 21, and Jack Taylor, 25, were found in the St Margaret’s Church courtyard in east London between June 2014 and September 2015.

Port was arrested in October after he was linked to the crimes, and currently awaits trial on four counts of murder and four counts of administering a poison with intent to endanger life or inflict grievous bodily harm. The police then asked the public to reach out if they have any information about Port. When he appeared in court Monday, Port was faced with several new charges from eight survivors of alleged attacks that took place between 2011 and 2015. In addition to the original manslaughter, murder, and poisoning charges, the alleged serial killer will now face seven counts of rape, four of sexual assault, and six extra counts of poisoning, bringing the total number of charges to 29. Port denied all the charges during his pre-trial hearing on Monday and the trial is now set to begin on October 4.

MTV’S ‘TRUE LIFE’ FOLLOWED SURVIVORS OF PULSE NIGHTCLUB & WILL AIR THE STORIES IN AUGUST Since 1998, MTV’s True Life has been telling the stories of young people in America. They’ve touched on all aspects of life in the short documentaries that have captivated audiences since its inception. While some seem fun and trivial, others touch on very serious issues. On August 15, the groundbreaking show will follow the lives of four victims of the mass shooting at Pulse Nightclub in Orlando. Tony Marrero, Patience Carter, Tiara Parker, and Joshua McGill will let the network take a peek into their lives as they try to come to terms with the harrowing attack that took place on June 12 when madman Omar Mateen killed 49 people and wounded 53 others. The 32 year old was shot four times during the attack, leaving injuries to his arm and back which are still healing. 6

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“People think because I got released from the hospital and I’m in rehab right now that I’m okay. I’m not okay,” Marrero says. “I’m still connected to a machine because of my back. I have a hole in my back. My arms is still shattered … I’m not okay, and not only physical. I can’t even start with mentally. I’m not nearly okay.” Carter, 20, and Tiara, 20, were visiting Orlando from Philadelphia. They were at Pulse with their cousin, Akyra Murray, who at 18 is the youngest victim of the shooting. McGill, 26, is credited with helping save the life of bartender Rodney Sumter, who was shot multiple times. McGill crafted a makeshift tourniquet from his shirt to stop the bleeding in Sumter’s arms. A dedication to the victims will also air during the episode.


Ryan Howe + Evelyn Franco

WHY WOULD DNC LEADERS THROW SHADE AT BLACK AND LGBT DONORS? Thanks to a nearly 20,000-strong email Wikileak from top members of the Democratic National Committee, an institution that purports unbiased assistance, support, and services to all presidential nominees from the Democratic party, the DNC’s weekend was a real pain in the ass. Revelations of a longstanding bias in favor of Hillary Clinton — and mockery of fellow presidential nominee Bernie Sanders — lead to the resignation of DNC Chair Debbie Wasserman Schultz. However, as more emails are sifted through, people are finding shady dealings and flat-out shade. We did our own digging and found a few gnarly threads that don’t fare well for the DNC’s LGBT Council, in particular to the man appointed to lead said LGBT Council, Scott Comer, who also serves as finance chair for the org. As he’s discussing two donors — Robert Smith and Rod Grozier who are on the host committee for planning an LGBT Gala for the DNC — Scott tells DNC Finance Chair consultant Zachary Allen: “I hate these people so much,” before going on to bash the gentleman’s “stupid promo party in NY.” Check out the rest of these stories at OutFrontOnline.com

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PROTECTING THE RIGHTS OF TRANSGENDER PEOPLE STARTS BUT DOES NOT END WITH QUALITY HEALTHCARE SINCE THE PASSAGE OF HOUSE BILL 2 IN NORTH CAROLINA this past March, politicians have been talking a lot more about transgender people’s access to public spaces like restrooms. Unfortunately, many of these conversations have purposely left out the voices of transgender people and their families. Transgender people are still harassed in school hallways, fired after transitioning on the job, and refused housing. This discrimination also reaches into every part of our healthcare system. Transgender and gender-nonconforming people face an increased risk for HIV and an increased risk of depression and violence, while having lower rates of health insurance. This results in huge health disparities that require both policy and culture change to overcome. Almost 20 percent of transgender people report being refused medical care and 50 percent of people say they have had to educate their medical providers about transgender care. Many people also report postponing care due to a fear of discrimination and feeling unsupported by their medical providers. Additionally, there are issues of insurance coverage, affordability, and navigating a health system that does not know how to meet or respect the needs of transgender people. The Affordable Care Act (ACA) has helped to address some of the issues transgender and gendernonconforming people face. The ACA prohibits discrimination in hospitals and health coverage based on sexual orientation, gender identity, and HIV/ AIDS status. It helps to make sure people cannot be charged more for health insurance or services simply because of sexual orientation or gender identity. People cannot be denied coverage due to pre-existing conditions or have coverage dropped if they get sick. There is also no lifetime coverage for chronic illnesses like HIV/AIDS. Transgender people now have the right to medically necessary services, such as gender transition and confirmation care. Many transgender people living 8

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without health insurance may also now be eligible for free or low-cost coverage through their state health insurance marketplace, which can cover the cost for transition-related care, and help with preventative care and managing chronic conditions. The gains we’ve made through the new healthcare regulations and insurance plans are an important step forward in improving health outcomes for transgender people, but true equality must exist beyond the doctor’s office. In Colorado, transgender people still face discrimination at the voting booth and employment. A majority of transgender people across the country continue to live in poverty and face h a r a s s m e nt and violence. This is especially true for transgender people of color who are forced to live in fear as each week or month we see another report of a transgender person being killed. We have made progress, but there is more work to be done to ensure that every Coloradan can live with respect and dignity. We can do better. We must do better.

Cristina Aguilar + Austin Montoya


LEGAL DIRECTORY

HOW TO CHOOSE THE RIGHT PERSONAL INJURY ATTORNEY HERE ARE FIVE TIPS THAT CAN HELP: Experience. The value of an attorney’s experience will come in handy when assessing and investigating a claim. Hiring a personal injury attorney who knows what to look for, where to look for it, and how it applies to your case can make a big difference. Specialization. Just like doctors specialize in certain areas of medicine, lawyers usually specialize in certain areas of the law. An attorney that specializes in personal injury has a unique set of skills that will help determine issues of liability such as negligence and causation. Reputation. When it comes to resolving your claim fairly and expeditiously, look for an attorney with a positive reputation in your

community. Selecting an attorney that has a good reputation will go a long way in dealing with insurance companies and the other attorneys handling your claim. Personality. When you’ve been injured, you want an attorney that values the importance of being available to take questions, update you on the status of your claim, and return your calls in a timely manner. Personality is often the most overlooked factor in selecting an attorney, but it can be a good indicator of how they operate their business. You are going to be spending a good amount of time with them, so you want to make sure you like your attorney and trust that your experience is going to be a good one. Patience. As you go through the hiring process, remember: There is no need to rush the process. Selecting your attorney is an important step, and you can take your time to do it right so you’re confident that your claim will be in good hands and handled with the care it deserves.

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The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.

outfrontonline.com/legal-directory | To advertise here, please call 303-477-4000.

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CU INTRODUCES AN LGBT-FOCUSED MENTAL HEALTH CLINIC BUILDING 500 ON THE CU ANSCHUTZ CAMPUS LOOMS above modern cars in lots like an art-deco anomaly amid fresher brick buildings and swift-footed millennials in scrubs. The arcane remnant has a distinctly noir feel to go with its solid reputation for being haunted by dead soldiers. Built in the time when Ford Model Ts were all the rage, the hospital was constructed specifically for WWI patients suffering from chemical-warfare injuries during missions throughout Europe. And until very recently, the campus itself was a chorus of groans from hopeful LGBT mental-health patients who desired targeted, specific mental healthcare for their unique needs. “There just wasn’t any,” admits Dr. Robert Davies, MD, associate professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Colorado School of Medicine. And it’s not uncommon. Healthcare tailored to the needs of the LGBT community is at a glaring lack in this country. As well, people who identify as LGBT often don’t seek healthcare that’s specific to their needs. “I read the One Colorado report on access to healthcare and mental healthcare in the LGBT community,” he says, “and it struck me that so many people avoided mental healthcare because of fear. One of the biggest obstacles [isn’t] that people were being necessarily treated poorly, but that they just expect to be treated poorly, so they were avoiding mental healthcare altogether. And thus, the foundation of the first LGBT-centered mental health clinic in the state of Colorado was wrought. Dr. Davies spearheaded the addition of a mentalhealth clinic at CU that caters specifically to the LGBT community, and it’s known as the CU Health LGBTQ Mental Health Clinic at the University of Colorado Hospital. The clinic is staffed by second- and third-year psych residents who deeply understand the upset of being cared for by LGBT-clueless providers who (often unwittingly) ruin even the most mundane of 10

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experiences and, in the process, deter future visits to healthcare facilities — in some cases, permanently. One of those residents is Lexi C h av e z , MD, a second-year psych resident who identifies as transgender. Her large, expressive eyes imbue conviction as she recalls past visits. “When I’ve been to various providers, they’ve refused to use whatever pronouns I’ve asked them to. They’ve called me the wrong name, and they do it with a smile. They’re like, ‘How are you doing, [wrong name]?’ and, “He’s coming back,’ or something like that. I mean, I appreciate that, but it’s totally off base.” She shakes her head slightly. So what does one do? “You try and plow through it, and just be like, ‘Look. I’m here. I have this half an hour. I really need such and such,” she says. “At times, they’ll circle back around like, ‘No, really. Tell me this

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Berlin Sylvestre


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and that about your transition, but it’s like, ‘That’s not why I’m here.’ And they’re really focused on it. They’re like, ‘Ok, I’ve never dealt with this before. I don’t know anyone that’s trans, so what I want to do is stop all your medications.’” (Repeat: “What I want to do is stop all your medications.”) For a trans patient dealing with say, cancer, such a move could spell a death sentence. In the wild, wild west of LGBT health issues, however, not knowing how medications and hormones some trans individuals take will interact with other drugs, doctors are hard-pressed to prescribe something that may cause or exacerbate sickness. “I have hypothyroidism,” Lexi tells OUT FRONT. She needs proper medication for the illness, but “I can’t get that approved by my insurance company because my provider put that I’m trans in my medical record.” She’s exasperated. “I can’t get it approved. I think that [physicians] want to do right, but they don’t necessarily know the right way.” But the omission of quality LGBT healthcare doesn’t rest entirely on the shoulders of mental health clinics. For generations, the LGBT community has shied away from seeing a doctor for the very real fear of mistreatment. “I refuse to go to the doctor, actually,” Lexi admits. “Not until I know I can get a good one. You don’t schedule appointments to have arguments.” “For a long time, people haven’t sought mental health treatment in the LGBT community because of their fear of not being understood or being referred for reparative therapy or seeing being gay as pathology,” Dr. Davies adds. Pathology refers to illness and disease, and reparative therapy, of course, is the contested practice of “curing” someone of their LGBT nature. And about those reparative therapies? “There’s no evidence that it works or that it does anything,” he says. “It is a despicable practice which offers no benefit and most often causes irreparable harm.” As a gay man who wasn’t always comfortable with that side of himself — for 41 years, to be exact — he 12

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knows what staying in the closet can do to a person’s mental health. Hiding who he truly was, he tells OUT FRONT: “I was married to a woman for 20 years and have two wonderful children, both of whom are now adults and both of whom are now gay,” he says. “[That] was a long time and part of [being closeted] was just growing up in the family I grew up in, and fear of how that was going to be perceived.” In the meantime, he says he had lots of gay friends, and “was a huge advocate on their behalf because it was the closest I could get to being who I was.” Eventually he came out and, as fate would have it, his family was fine with it. But often, the yearslong suppression of self takes its toll. “Why I’m doing child [psychiatry] in general is you can really make an impact on people early on that can change the entire trajectory of their life,” says Child Psychiatry Fellow Barbara Kessel, DO. “That, to me, is just so powerful.”

“I have hypothyroidism,” Dr. Lexi Chavez tells OUT FRONT. “I can’t get [my medications] approved by my insurance company because my provider put that I’m transgender in my medical record.”

Lexi agrees. “We talk about how people are socialized and you’re trained from a very early age how to be a ‘good’ girl, how to be a ‘good’ boy and what that means. [There are] very strict, defined gender roles and you feel a conflict with that; not really feeling like what you’re being taught matches up with you know. It adds this layer of not feeling that people understand you to a certain degree, because there’s always something they don’t know.” For trans people, that can result in a disconnect from a typical lived experience once he or she enters adulthood.

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Psychiatric students from around the United States receive very little training in the way of LGBT specifics. The University of Colorado has the remedy. “You have to re-experience your own growing up, your own adolescence, and your childhood from a different lens,” she explains. “[You have] to understand what it means to live in the world a certain way because you don’t have the same kind of experiences other people do to identify with.” Along with the clinic, Dr. Davies has put together a program for psych residents that trains them on LGBT-related health issues. As it stands, there’s “very little,” says third-year psych resident Cassidy Williams, MD. “There’s some kind of formal education that we get, in a scheme of, ‘Here’s a lot of cultural sensitivity and LGBTQ sensitivity that’s all been grouped together. But other than that, it’s pretty brief.” Beyond the mental health aspect, there’s also a physical wellbeing factor that many doctors don’t take into account when dealing with transgender patients. Such as: “Cervical cancer screening,” Lexi says. “Pap smears are important for anyone with a cervix. So even if you have a [transgender] man coming in, if he has a cervix, he needs a pap smear. If you have a [transgender] woman coming in who has a prostate, when they get older they’re going to need that checked, as well.” These are but a few among the exhaustive list of needs that the clinic aims to provide the community. “When I interviewed here, Dr. Davies said, ‘Well, what are your interests?’” Lexi says. “I said, ‘I talked to some people about my child and research interests, but who do I talk to about expanding LGBT health?’ And he gets this grin and was like, ‘Well, that would be me.’” Dr. Davies beams at the memory. Lexi continues: “I’m amazed that this happened so fast. In my mind, I expected this to take five, six years — my entire residency — of working with this, trying to get people on board. And so [Dr. Davies] calls me into his office one day and says, ‘I’ve got good news: I got the go-ahead.’” Her response? “Let’s do this!” And now, with a supportive family and a passionate staff at his back, Dr. Davies can pay it all forward. Finally, the LGBT community here in Colorado is welcome to a mental-health clinic of their own. That puts a mind at ease. 14

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HOUSE COMMITTEE HOLDS HEARING ON ANTI-LGBT FADA LEGISLATION ON TUESDAY, JULY 12, THE US HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES held a special hearing regarding the proposed First Amendment Defense Act (FADA), which was introduced into the legislative chamber in June by Rep. Raul Labrador (R., ID). The hearing — coming exactly one month after the massacre of 49 people at a gay nightclub in Orlando, Florida — exposed deep divisions among members of Congress concerning LGBT issues. The legislation, formally designated as H.R. 2802, would prohibit the “federal government from taking discriminatory action against a person on the basis that such person believes or acts in accordance with a religious belief or moral conviction that: (1) marriage is or should be recognized as the union of one man and one woman, or (2) sexual relations are properly reserved to such a marriage.” In other words, for example, business owners would be allowed to refuse to provide services at a same-sex wedding or reception if doing so would violate their personal religious or moral beliefs. In another example, a landlord might be allowed to deny housing to a transgender person. FADA has 117 co-sponsors in addition to Rep. Labrador — all but one of them Republican. (The sole Democrat co-sponsor is Daniel Lipinski from Illinois.) The Republican sponsors and supporters argue that the legislation is needed to protect the religious beliefs of business owners and other individuals, shielding them against federal prosecution for LGBT discrimination. Democrat opponents counter that FADA, if passed, would effectively legalize discrimination against LGBT people. They especially fear that the bill would weaken two existing federal protections for LGBT individuals — an executive order banning federal contractors from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity, and a law requiring hospitals receiving Medicare and Medicaid to allow patients to have visits from same-sex partners. Consequently, Democrats argue, a federal social services contractor 16

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might reject LGBT people from homeless shelters or substance abuse programs. The bill’s opponents further point out that federal employees might be allowed to refuse to process tax returns, visa applications, and Social Security checks of LGBT people. Yet another concern is that FADA might even lead to discrimination against unmarried heterosexual couples. One of the individuals testifying against FADA at the hearing of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform was former Congressman Barney Frank (D., MA). Frank responded to Republican concerns that existing laws might allow tax exemptions to be eliminated for religious organizations found to discriminate against LGBT people. He compared people who have such concerns to those “who think Elvis is alive,” pointing out that tax exemptions are not the same thing as federal grants, which require much more federal scrutiny and compliance with antidiscrimination regulations. Another individual speaking against FADA was Jim Obergefell, one of the plaintiffs in the landmark 2015 Supreme Court case of Obergefell v. Hodges,

A.J. Smuskiewicz


“There’s no question that there is government hostility toward people who believe that marriage is between one man and one woman.” — Attorney Kristen Waggoner, of the Alliance Defending Freedom in which the high court ruled that the right to same-sex marriage is guaranteed by the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution. Referring to the Orlando tragedy, Obergefell scolded the committee, “This hearing is deeply hurtful to a still grieving LGBT and allied community.” Among the people testifying in favor of FADA was Kevin Cochran, the former fire chief of Atlanta. Cochran was fired in 2015 after he wrote a book describing homosexuality as “vile, vulgar, and inappropriate.” Although Cochran’s case suggested potential problems with laws protecting the LGBT community, the fact is that FADA would not have saved Cochran’s job, because he was a city government employee, to which the proposed new law does not apply. Also advocating passage of FADA was attorney Kristen Waggoner, of the Alliance Defending Freedom. She told the committee, “There’s no question that there is government hostility toward people who believe that marriage is between one man and one woman. What we’re seeing at the state, and at the federal level, is that those who have [this] politically unpopular view are being silenced, banished, and punished.” It remains to be seen whether FADA can be defeated, or whether it may pass during the remaining term of President Barack Obama or during the term of the president to be elected this November. Even if it does pass through Congress, however, it could theoretically be found unconstitutional. The proposed federal law is similar to a Mississippi state law that a federal judge ruled unconstitutional in late June. On July 11 — the day before the House hearing — the platform committee of the Republican National Convention approved an amendment in favor of FADA, along with various other amendments generally viewed as opposed to LGBT interests. Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump had suggested in December 2015 that he would be inclined to sign such legislation should it reach his desk as president. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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PERSPECTIVES

POKÉMON GO FORTH & CONQUER IT WAS 10PM, DARK, AND I WAS WALKING AROUND MY NEIGHBORHOOD WAITING FOR MY EGG TO HATCH. More specifically, I was playing Pokémon Go, the hot new app on the block that prompts users to wander around catching Pokémon monsters, projected onto phone screens using augmented reality. The game was an instant hit, jumping to the top of the Apple App Store’s most downloaded list and gaining 10 million downloads just hours after it was released. With more than 20 million people playing it daily, it has surpassed Tinder in active US users.

were spent seated in a car, driving around catching Pokémon. And I’m guessing I’m not the only one that has thought of this (rather lazy) shortcut. There are also concerns about traffic accidents as people

You heard that right: More people are out there tracking down Doduos than those looking to catch a late-night shag. What a world we live in. Immediately after Pokémon Go was released, news channels became flooded with stories of distracted drivers/walkers/boaters getting into crashes and predictions for the future of augmented reality. As a health reporter, I am intrigued about the benefits and downfall of the game, especially when it comes to players’ well being. The first positive for Pokémon Go is the very nature of the game itself. Rather than the majority of video games that require sitting in front of a screen and minimal movement besides some wrist calisthenics and thumb stretching, Pokémon Go forces the user get out of the house. Pokémon and Pokéstops (locations where users can stock up on Pokéballs) are located all over, near parks, restaurants, national monuments and landmarks. Wandering around on the quest to “catch ’em all” is a fun way to get the miles in, and perhaps visit places you’ve never thought to visit. I also like the community that has formed around fellow Pokémon Go players; more than once I have been called out (very nicely) by fellow players as I make my way to the next Pokéstop on the block. “Hatching” eggs, which you also collect and “incubate” requires walking 5 kilometers — hence my manic pacing outside at 10pm. But before I spout off exclamations of an “obesity cure” found conveniently in millions of phones, I have to admit: My first few hours of the game 18

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literally stop their cars in the middle of the street to catch the little creatures, and other bodily harm, like the tale of two men falling off a cliff while playing the game. I’m still not sure how I feel about augmented images crowding our lives, making us focus on the Squirtle in front of us instead of the pretty flowers or sunset. But I have to admit that Pokémon Go is becoming a helpful hand, leading those that are content to stay cooped inside out into the world.

Kelsey Lindsey


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Less is more.

From OK to Outstanding: DIY HOme BeautificatiOn YVONNE WRIGHT

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It’s the golden rule of fashion accessories, and when it comes to jewelry, belts, and handbags it couldn’t be more true. Fashion icon Coco Chanel coined the phrase to ensure you are wearing your accessories, instead of them wearing you. Coco did not, however, follow this advice in her home and neither should you. Her house was a mosaic masterpiece. Like most elegant and inviting homes, hers was full of colors, textures, lighting, and beautiful personal items. Home accessories are what turn a house from ok to outstanding and you can do it by following a few simple decorating rules.

GOOD BONES Start by making sure your home has good bones. Most decorators begin with muted colors because they provide a wonderful background to build upon. Right now gray is a very popular neutral, but any color can be neutral if you choose the right shade.


Even pink (this year’s trend color) can provide a beautiful background if the shade is light and muted. If you love bold colors on your walls, go for it. But, your furniture and accents will need to be more subdued. Arrange furniture by making cozy groupings where people can gather and talk. One of the biggest mistakes people make is putting a couch along one wall and a loveseat along another — even if they’re miles apart. Assess the room. Couches do not need to be against a wall! Furniture arrangements should be intimate, allowing people to sit relatively close to each other, even if you need to make several different groupings in one room.

COLORS + TEXTURES Once you have a basic, inviting arrangement, it’s time to bump it up. Layer your rooms with colors and different textures. This is where accessories come in. Smooth throw pillows, knobby rugs, mirrors, plants, and art can be scattered to create depth and pops of color. If family is important to you, arrange a bunch of framed family snapshots. If you like a southwestern theme, think about interesting ways to mix it up. Lean a rustic wood ladder against a wall. Mount some antlers over the fireplace. I love New Orleans, so my kitchen wall is decorated with a mixture of pen and ink drawings of the city, carnival masks, and antique French plates.

Ever. If you do want just one picture on your wall, it should be very large and/or balanced by other items like plant hangers, sconces, mirrors — essentially any item you find beautiful. Smaller pieces of art should be arranged in groupings. Think balance! Side-by-side is not balanced. One picture higher than the other is. Or surround one central piece. Again, it’s nice to break it up with other hanging objects.

LIGHTING You can change the entire feel of your home with lighting. Scattering lamps around a room gives you the option of going from soft, diffused lighting to bright light. Portable mini-lights under kitchen cabinets are a great way to illuminate counters. Portable floor lights can spotlight single items like a large plant. Don’t forget natural light. Dressing windows with thin, see-through material under heavier curtains also gives you several lighting options.

WHAT YOU LOVE Think hard about what you love and surround yourself with it. Get creative. You can literally hang anything on a wall. Most items can be framed or placed in a shadow box. My fiancé’s childhood bat is mounted on a baseball-themed wall. If you love bright red, you can add beautiful splashes of it against a neutral shade. Or consider painting a smaller room, like your bathroom, in a bright, bold color. It’s your home. Enjoy it!

Group similar colors and themes together. If color isn’t your thing, think about adding texture to the walls with molding a couple shades lighter or darker. All white rooms are beautiful, but you don’t want all shades of white to be the same. Mix ivories and creams with bright whites and pull it all together with simple accents like silver candle holders and picture frames.

ART When it comes to art, more is more. Do not hang a small picture by itself on a big wall. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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HOw to be FabulOus for Cheap ADDISON HERRON-WHEELER

It doesn’t matter if you’re gay or straight,

cis or trans, male or female or nonbinary — sometimes you just want to look fabulous. However, in our society, looking great often goes hand in hand with shelling out big bucks. Salons charge a lot for cuts and dyes, waxing, manicures, etc., and nice clothes, shoes, and jewelry can often be out of our price range. But don’t let that get you down — next time you get the urge to feel fabulous, here are a few tips to help you get beautiful on the cheap.

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There are a million ways to save a jillion bucks, and most are right at your fingertips. DYE YOUR OWN HAIR — AND IF CHEMICALS SCARE YOU, USE HENNA

of family member who knows how to do hair or makeup and offering to trade them something for doing yours.

One thing that can get expensive is hair. We humans can be incredibly vain when it comes to the fuzzy stuff on top of our heads. We like to cut it, style it, dye it, put weaves in it — just generally do anything but what comes naturally, which can cost big bucks. Next time you get the urge to dye your hair, try using a box kit instead of paying a lot of money. Just get a friend to help you with application. Worst case scenario, if the dye looks too cheap, you can always go to the salon and fix it. If using chemicals on your own head freaks you out, or if going too permanent is not for you, try henna. This natural color aid will simply bring out the natural red, black, brown, or blond undertones of your hair, usually with a little extra hint of red. It’s also really good for your hair — it’s like a face mask, but on top of your head.

If they give you a manicure or pedicure, you’ll edit their

MAKE SUGAR PASTE FOR WAXING

tweaks and cuts to. If you have a little more spending

Waxing is expensive and painful. Next time you want to remove some hair from a problem area, mix up some sugar paste instead. All you need to make the stuff is sugar (of course), lemons, water, and a little bit of salt. Find a recipe online, cook it up, chill it, and use it. There’s a lot of conflicting info online about how to make it, but the best kind is not too burned, not too underdone, and should be fun to play with, like silly putty, before you use it to remove hair. If it’s sticky to the touch and getting all over your hands when you try to play with it, it needs to chill more.

resume, DJ their wedding party, or do whatever you do best free of charge.

CHECK OUT CONSIGNMENT STORES AND THRIFT STORES Some people think thrifting is just for finding crazy costumes or for if you’re so down on your luck that you don’t have the clothing you need to survive. Not true! Thrift stores hide all kinds of hidden gems. Look for vintage stuff, the so-bad-it’s-good, (those hipsters who bought their ironic dragon or kitten shirts new are suckers), awesome stuff that ended up there by some miracle, or slightly outdated stuff you can make minor money but still don’t want to spring for the super highend, check out consignment stores like Buffalo Exchange. Their prices are a little higher than thrift stores, but they only take things that are fashionable and desirable, so you won’t be slogging your way through a bunch of junk.

DO A CLOTHING SWAP One person’s trash truly is another person’s treasure, and this is the beauty of a clothing swap. That pair of pants that never fit right will become your best friend’s new trusty jeans, and the necklace they don’t like because

FIND A FRIEND WHO KNOWS COSMETICS AND TRADE If you are one of those who really, really can’t do any type of beauty routine yourself, try finding a close friend 24

AUGUST 03, 2016

it reminds them of an ex will become your new staple. Either hang out and trade with just one friend, or organize a party where everyone can bring things to make it even more fun.


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our handy hOw-to will take the burn out of first-time grilling + show yOu how to make summer sizzle. WESLEY SMITH

1 FLUID OUNCE (30ML) 1/4 CUP (60ML)

4 TBSP

Never grilled? Never fear!

You know what’s sexy?

Grillmasters. The expertise by which they crack a beer, baby the grill flames, check on marinades, then place a beautiful slab of meat on the sizzler — all in that adorable Kiss the Cook apron. They make it look so easy! The secret? It is easy, so don’t be intimidated by the raw food and open flame. Take this article, place it on your kitchen counter, and let’s up the ante on your reputation as the ultimate party host, you sexy future-chef, you. Serves four. For your cookout, let’s go with steak, corn, asparagus, and grilled garlic bread. We’re gonna do New York Strip for two reasons: so you don’t have to research the jillions of cuts of steak available, and because strip is meaty enough to satisfy and marbled enough not to stick to the grill as easily. The morning of your grillout, secure four NY strip steaks cut at least an inch thick — the butcher at any grocery store can provide that — four ears of corn (still in the husk), two bundles of raw asparagus, and a loaf of ciabatta. Put the steaks on a plate, sprinkle both sides lightly with kosher salt, wrap them in cellophane, slam them in the fridge, and only take them out before you’re about to grill them. Note: Don’t pepper them yet; scorched pepper can ruin the flavor. Soak the corn in a big pot lightly salted water on the counter and walk away. Cut off the hard, “woody” ends of your asparagus, roll them around in ¼ cup of olive oil, three chopped garlic cloves, a teaspoon sesame oil (if you have some), and a tablespoon of soy sauce. Stick them in the fridge. Slice the ciabatta however you like, then drizzle with olive oil and rub with a peeled garlic clove. Fridge those too, then go about your day.


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Lay your asparagus on the grill perpendicular to the grates (so they don’t fall in) and close the lid. Go get your ciabatta and after three minutes, open your grill, move your asparagus to the sides, and put the bread on. Close. After a minute, open the lid, do the diamond trick to your bread, close, and wait another minute. Plate all those bad boys, ring the dinner bell, and roll in the compliments. You’ve done it.

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Now, plate the steaks and corn and don’t touch them for at least five minutes. (Bonus badassery: as the steaks cool, place a pat of butter on them to seep into the meat.)

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Brush a bit of olive oil in the centermost spot on the grill and carefully lay two steaks on. This is where you get nervous as a newbie, but don’t: the magic will happen, you’ve got this. After four minutes of turning the corn while the steaks are cooking, you’re going to rotate (not flip) your steaks. Grab a steak at the 6 o’clock position and rotate it to 3 o’clock. Same for the other. (This is where those amazing diamond-pattern sears come from.) Wait two minutes, then flip the steaks over completely. Wait three minutes, repeat the grilling marks trick, and in another two minutes, your steak is medium rare (perfect). If you like it done to medium, wait another two minutes. Anything over that and we’re no longer friends.

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Hours have passed and everything’s seasoned perfectly. Let’s get heated. I prefer charcoal for the flavor of open flame it imparts onto the food. Get the “ready-light” variety and stack the coals into a loose pyramid. The fire might jump up a bit, so be careful. Leave the grill open for all the fuel in the coals to burn off. (Seriously, let the coals turn white before you even think about throwing food on; they’ll taste like lighter fluid if you’re impatient.) When your coals are white-hot, spread them with your tongs and close the grill for a few minutes. Come back with the corn and place them on. Isn’t that sizzle so summery? Close the lid and wait a few minutes before you rotate them. After ten minutes of spinnin’ those puppies, move them to the sides of the grill, where it’s not so hot.

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HAMBURGERS will cook faster if you make a few punctures in them before cooking. This allows the heat to circulate more evenly.

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How Not To Flirt with Lesbians (Lookin’ at you, straight chicks!) ELLE BROWNING

Before I start,

I’d like to specifically address this to straight chicks who are sober at said time of flirtation. Alas. If ever there’s an apropos time for the word “adorkable,” it’s probably when one of you (often) endearing, shy, (mostly) straight women find yourself drawn to the lesbian among your friends and/or coworkers. It’s usually not the first time you’ve seen her, of course; this normally occurs to you after a few rounds of talking about work, school, TV, music, nothing important, and the likes. There’s a … certain something about this chick that’s actually rather intriguing. She has an interesting aura that doesn’t feel like my other friends’ auras. Her sense of humor is so wicked! Her perspective on things is kind of refreshing, actually. Ok, but she doesn’t like men sexually at all? Not even a little? I really like her hair. Her style. Her voice. Her mannerisms. And then: She’s really kind of … sexy, to be honest. Not that I’m gay, of course, but … I could see that happening. And hey: It happens. A lot. And if I may say, on behalf of lesbians who’ve found themselves on the receiving end of your adoration, that’s really fucking sweet. Wow. Thank you. It’s a huge compliment and it really helps a sister out on a bad day. Now: Can we talk about your flirting styles? (Omg, they’re hilarious, c’mon! No shame, mama — it’s all in good fun.)

FULL THROTTLE Some of you ladies out there have gotten so sick of waiting for men to approach you, that you’ve mastered the approach yourselves. You invite Lesbian Crush over — let’s name her Cara — for some Netflix and Chill, right? You’ve ordered some food, have plenty of drinks in the fridge, cleaned the apartment like you’re trying to get laid because you totally are, and made sure your bra and undies would elicit a salute from armed troops, they’re so everything America’s about. Cara arrives looking better than she normally does in your eyes, and you want to jump her bones right there on the welcome mat. But you hold out. Cara looks a little too casual for you to turn the heat up this early. After a few bites and a beer, it’s time to hit play on the movie, but you situate yourself so close to her on the couch that it’s obvious you’re ready to hit play on something else. After your intentions are made certain by your ACTUAL BREASTS pressing against her arm, she excuses herself to your bathroom. You’re getting turned on by the coy business she’s giving and you sense it’s almost time to leap. “I actually can’t stay,” she says after coming out. She’s holding her phone like it’s the apology incarnate and shoves it back in her pocket. She offers to pay half for the takeout and drinks, but you’ll have none of it. Thanking you once again, she leaves in a rush and you’re left with the hugest “Ok,wtf?” of your entire life. That’s some Straight-Girl Thirsty and you’ve never tasted it before. Bitter, yeah? Girl. The fix? Calm the hell down. Just because you want her doesn’t mean she wants you. Not at the moment, anyway. Some lesbians aren’t the wanton, lustful creatures you’ve been deejaying your vag to. Remember the “chill” part of Netflix and …

STUCK IN NEUTRAL So you’ve both established that there’s a little “something” there, but it’s been a really slow process because you’re new to this whole “girl crush” business. Totally ok. But after about two months of movies and playful texts and the occasional lingering hug, Cara’s about ready to bail on you. You see her talking to other girls who are obviously into her and seemingly aren’t afraid to take something to another level. How dare she dismiss all your hard work? That’s something a stupid boy would do! The fix? Girl, step your game up. Time is finite and if you’re really ready to venture into LesboLand, put the train in gear. We’re not saying wear some lingerie under your work uniform and pull her into the office (although we’re not not saying that), but if she’s leery of you not really being into her, she’s not going to invest for very long. We got lives to live, homegirl! Put some heat on the stove or just admit you should be friends.

THE “CAN MY BOYFRIEND WATCH?” Girl, bye. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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BEARS + JELLO A large crowd packed the Denver Wrangler on July 16th to wet their whistle and enjoy a little of their weekend. The House of DeHerrera was out in force selling Jello shots to help raise funds for the Front Range Bears, a non-profit social organization for hirsute men and their admirers. The Wrangler announced that their last day at 1700 Logan Avenue will be July 26th and that they are slated to reopen at their new 3090 Downing Street location on August 14th. Photos by Charles Broshous

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HOw to Fit the Third ADDISON HERRON-WHEELER

So, you’re in a polyamorous relationship

— a relationship with two other people or more. Things are going wonderfully. Contrary to popular belief, no one is jealous; no one is being left out; and everyone is feeling happy and supported by the relationship they are building. But there’s just one problem. Moving in with one significant other is hard enough; try moving your stuff into a house that already has two people’s stuff in it, or trying to fit a fourth person into your already-three-person household. It’s tough, but that doesn’t mean it can’t work. With the right adjustments, you can be living communally, sharing your love, and saving money on bills and rent while you do it.

GET PLENTY OF STORAGE This one is a must for fitting multiple people’s clothing, kitchenware, etc. into a small or reasonably sized space. If you just have one chest of drawers and a closet, that isn’t going to cut it when it comes to polyamorous living. There won’t be enough room for everything, which will leave people feeling ousted or like they have too much stuff and are being a bother. Get a small shelf or bin divider in the bedroom for each person so that everyone has a space. Make extra room in the kitchen for silverware, and buy a bookshelf for the significant other who has a huge collection. Doing this will keep everyone feeling good, and also keep your house from being a collective wreck. 30

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KEEP IT ORGANIZED Going off of the above tip, it’s paramount that you keep your stuff organized once you’ve found the space for it. Just because you’re OK being involved in each other’s love lives doesn’t mean you want your stuff all mixed together so you can’t tell what is what. It’s perfectly reasonable to decide only your dresses and shirts can go in a certain dresser. Otherwise, it could take forever to find your clothes in the morning, or you could end up having a petty disagreement about folding or organization. You can also keep separate areas for things like valuable dishes or record collections that you don’t want to just toss on a shelf or in a cabinet.

LAY DOWN SOME GROUND RULES It also doesn’t hurt to come up with some basic rules for keeping things in their places and avoiding confusion or aggravation. This doesn’t mean having unreasonable rules about people not touching anything in your area or freaking out on anyone; just like with a two-person relationship or having roommates, that’ll come off as selfish and annoying. But it’s OK to come up with some basic guidelines, such as when to do laundry, who should put what away, how to divide up chores, etc. This way you won’t end up with one person never doing chores or taking care of things because they’re always at work or are always busy and out of the house.


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LIQUIDATE YOUR CURRENT MESS Another good plan of action is for everyone to clean out his, her, or their respective closets before moving in together. No, that’s not a metaphor for getting all your past indiscretions out on the table; you should actually clean out your closet. Get rid of anything unnecessary before moving in with your new partner(s) or letting your partner(s) move in. That dress that’s literally been in the back of your closet for two years that you need to sew up? Give it away or donate it. Those shoes that’re super nice but you’ve never had occasion to wear them? See if a consignment shop will buy them. Also make sure you aren’t going to have too many duplicate, triplicates, etc. of any one item. If everyone in the relationship has three or four saucepans, it may be time to compare pans and decide which you want to collectively keep, and which you can get rid of.

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GIVE EACH OTHER SPACE This one is key for emotional issues; the first rule of any relationship is to take a cooling-off period to wind down after an argument or serious conversation. So it just makes sense that the same applies to times when things are good. Just because you are all getting along doesn’t mean you need to be together constantly. Do you love to read in a nice quiet room with a glass of wine? Lock yourself in and do it — your other partners can spend quality time together or get out of the house for a while. Want to watch that TV show everyone else thinks is stupid? Be sure they set aside some time for you to watch it, even if they don’t want to join you. Having your own time where you can be yourself and do what you want to do is what’ll help you maintain a healthy and autonomous attitude, even while in a serious relationship.

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AUGUST 03, 2016

step 1: wrap your arms around your lover

step 2: gently roll him onto his stomach

step 3: pull your arm out from under him

step 4: place your arm above him, spoon


COLORADO SQUID The Colorado SQUID (Swimming Queers United in Denver) swim team took to the pool at La Alma Recreation Center on July 23rd as part of their weekly training regimen. Members come out each week for a variety of reasons including fun, fitness, and competition. All are welcome regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Squidswimteam. org Photos by Charles Broshous

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CALENDAR August is a perfect time to enjoy a show, whether it be indoors or outdoors! Enjoy the summertime heat with a show at one of our famous amphitheaters, or sun yourself in the afternoon, then go to a theater venue in the evening! Choice is such a beautiful thing ... in this calendar, in fact, I’ll give you quite a few fun concert choices! Be sure to follow me on Twitter @ Mike_Halterman for fun entertainment photos and the latest buzz!

Mike Halterman

AUG 05

SUMMER OF LOVE If you’re a fan of R&B music like I am, you definitely shouldn’t miss the Summer of Love, featuring such past and present R&B artists as Keyshia Cole, Dru Hill, 112, Avant, and Lyfe Jennings. This special concert is making its way to Denver on Friday, August 5, with an 8 pm showtime. The Bellco Theatre plays host to these talented artists. AXS.com

AUG 09

AUG 07

CULTURE CLUB DEMI LOVATO + NICK JONAS Be cool this summer and see two of the hottest LGBT allied musicians out there today! The 2016 Future Now Tour featuring Demi Lovato and Nick Jonas makes its way to the Pepsi Center in Denver on Tuesday, August 9 at 7pm. Mike Posner, known for such hits as I Took a Pill in Ibiza, will be the opening act. AltitudeTickets.com 34

AUGUST 03, 2016

It’s safe to say that most people in our queer community have at least one Culture Club song that is their absolute favorite. (Mine is I’ll Tumble 4 Ya.) George, Jon, Mikey, and Roy set out on their first world tour in 14 years, and Denver is one of their many stops. Join them for a night of nostalgia and great music on Sunday, August 7 at 8pm at the Paramount Theater in Denver. Denver-Theater.com


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DISTURBED + BREAKING BENJAMIN

MARIANAS TRENCH

Canadian rock band Marianas Trench will be bringing their signature Vancouver sound to The Summit Music Hall in Denver on Tuesday, August 9 at 8pm. They will be performing some of their greatest hits as well as singles from their current album, Astoria. TheSummitMusicHall.com

Hard rock bands Disturbed and Breaking Benjamin have joined forces this summer for a nationwide amphitheater tour, which will be stopping in the Centennial State at Red Rocks Amphitheatre in Morrison. The concert, which will be held on Monday, August 15 at 6:30pm, will also feature special guests Alter Bridge and Saint Asonia. RedRocksOnline.com

AUG 10

AUG 16

DIGITOUR SUMMER Imagine, if you will, a “social media” concert tour, where fan input means that your favorite YouTube, Vine, or Instagram stars could be joining their favorite recording artists on the road! The Bluebird Theater in Denver will be hosting the Centennial State’s stop on the DigiTour Summer, Tuesday, August 16 at 6:30pm. Jake T. Austin, who recently left Freeform’s The Fosters TV series, will headline, and the roster will include names such as Sammy Wilk, Baby Ariel, Dylan Dauzat, and Weston Koury, among others. BluebirdTheater.net

AUG 14

NORAH JONES

Nine-time Grammy Award winner Norah Jones will bring her smooth jazz sounds and songs to the Ellie Caulkins Opera House in Denver this coming Wednesday, August 10 at 8pm. Jones, who won two Grammys for Album of the Year, will entertain audiences with her greatest hits and some of her favorite covers. AXS.com

OLD CROW MEDICINE SHOW Americana string band Old Crow Medicine Show, a recent Grammy Award winner for Best Folk Album, will be bringing their harmonious sound to Red Rocks Amphitheatre in Morrison on Sunday, August 14 at 7pm. Alternative singer Brandi Carlile will also perform, and Alabama singer-songwriters The Secret Sisters will open for the both of them. RedRocksOnline.com OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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Park Weggis Hotel on the shores of Lake Lucerne

BEY ND SWISS CHOC LATE + WATCHES; SUSTAINABLE LUXURY TOURISM

The Swiss Alps conjure images of alpenhorn players in folk dress and creamy cheeses and chocolate, stunning craggy mountains, and sweeping alpine meadows. Ahead of the game, Europe is making a push to keep these pristine ecological wonders as clean and fresh as the mountain air in which they currently reside. Denmark, for example, is aiming to consume only renewable electricity by 2035 and is aiming for 100 percent renewable energy countrywide by 2050. While in Switzerland, I was surprised to see the electric car as prominent as it was, with hotels and city centers home to charging stations throughout the country. 38

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First step on the luxury eco-tourism trip: select your car. Europcar offers many options and I went with the Tesla Model S at the Zurich airport. Next step: Figure out which hotels have charging stations and plot your course. One of the convenient features of the Model S is the GPS system that calculates your speed and charge (to let you know if you’ll make it to your destination). With a range of about 400 kilometers per full charge, driving from place to place is relatively easy as long as you recharge up every evening. Quick charge stations are now being installed at the hotels as well. WORDS + PHOTOS // CHAD CHISHOLM


[ MEDIA + MARKETING ]

Park Weggis is one such hotel, offering their own Cadillac electric car inhouse. The lakeside hotel is home to 52 rooms, six luxury spa cottages, and three restaurants. For a true taste of luxury, head to the Lalique Caviar Bar, where Lalique crystal adorns many of the surfaces in the comfortable lounge overlooking Lake Lucerne. With several activities in the area, guests can enjoy everything from hopping on the local ferry, taking a gondola ride or cog railway up Mount Pilatus, or enjoying the small-town feel on the lake in the numerous cafes along the waterfront. From Weggis, a charged-up drive through the Alps to Crans Montana is next on the schedule. From the longest tunnel in the world to soaring mountain passes, the drive is leisurely and scenic. Switzerland is home to a population of 8 million in the entire country; a comparable population is that of New York City at 8.4 million. Traffic is light and the road systems easy to navigate through the Tesla system or linked smartphone apps. Guarda Golf Hotel and Residences is the next stop in the Crans Montana wine valley region. A boutique hotel, the contemporary rooms and attention to luxury detail are prevalent throughout the property — a bottle of pillow mist left at turndown service or a local handcrafted chocolate to finish off the day just two examples of the thoughtful touches at this property. Newly married himself, the general manager and his husband reside in the mountain area welcoming

guests to this pristine retreat. A must-do experience is a personal wine-tasting on the patio overlooking the surrounding golf course; Swiss wines are seldom exported as the small vineyards service local hotels and restaurants almost exclusively. Appetizing apricots in the growing region are also distilled to aperitifs, made into preserves, and used in creative culinary dishes.

[ PHOTOGRAPHY ]

Back to Zurich on the final leg of the trip, the Tesla cruises by Lake Geneva, several small medieval towns, and over surging rivers. The cosmopolitan city of Zurich is abuzz with high-end retail, historic structures, and contemporary art displays. Baur au Lac hotel is lakeside overlooking the bustling boardwalk below. Whether enjoying a dinner in the atrium, or tea in the outdoor courtyard, the fashionable rooms have been home to royalty and celebrities alike. Gay travel in Switzerland is much like any major progressive city. When asking gay residents how it was to live in Switzerland back in the day, the typical laid-back Swiss response was that most people didn’t care and being gay was not an issue in the Swiss lifestyle. Marriage is legal, partners run businesses, are community leaders, and enjoy hosting gay guests in their beautiful country. Whether wanting an outdoor vacation full of hiking and mountain vistas, or a comfort-filled experience with caviar and fine wine, Switzerland has something for everyone, even the sustainably minded luxury traveler.

[ REAL ESTATE ]

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THAT TIME I GOT BOTOX:

MY VISIT TO THE ASARCH CENTER Paul Bindel

GROWING UP IN NEW MEXICO, I DIDN’T TRULY give skincare much thought: In my family, a sploosh of Lubriderm was “nice,” and three splooshes were “REAL nice,” so when I enter the Asarch Center for Dermatology and see I have to choose between two lobbies — one for aesthetics, another for dermatology — I realize I have a learning curve. “I like to educate people,” Dr. Asarch reassures me. “I don’t like to sell things.” One of the most respected dermatologists in the state with over 35 years of practice, Dr. Asarch certainly has the expertise to educate his clients.

“I LIKE TO EDUCATE PEOPLE,” DR. ASARCH REASSURES ME. “I DON’T LIKE TO SELL THINGS.”

He was the first person to bring Mohs Micrographic surgery (a highly effective skin-cancer treatment) to Colorado, he serves as a University of Colorado clinical professor, he created an award-winning skincare line, and he even coauthored a skin-health cookbook. In person, he has an approachable and grandfatherly demeanor, slightly whiskered with a charming grin. I open my backpack to show off my motley collection of skincare products, but he’s not too impressed: “These have moisturizers and oils,” he says, perusing the ingredient labels, “but there’s no way to tell what percentage of active ingredients they have.” In the 80s, Dr. Asarch accompanied his wife to NYC’s Bergdorf Goodman, whose massive underground cosmetology department had “all of these pretty women in white coats selling bottles,” Asarch recounts. “I looked at the bottles’ ingredients and saw that many had

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CONT’D FROM PAGE 40 nothing in them — that it was basically expensive goop, so I came back and did my own research.” From there, he partnered with a chemist friend to create a scientifically formulated skincare line called DermaSpa, which his employees and patients were more than willing to test: “Fortunately we have a lot of women here who wanted to volunteer. We tracked to see if it made a difference, and it did!” Patients come to the Asarch Center for the results, and those that come for elective procedures meet with Amanda Hill, the patient coordinator. Amanda is warm, funny, and helpful at explaining what procedures can offer. Based on what I reported about my skin, slightly oily with some acne, Amanda recommended a twice daily regimen. The AHA Facial Cleanser ($32) is ideal for reducing acne, while the DNA Repair Gel ($105) infuses the skin with vitamin C to repair from sun damage. Ever notice how children’s skin glows more than adults? Their skin cells renew themselves faster, so Amanda suggested I use Retin Aid + ($52) three times a week to encourage cell regeneration (and it’s my new favorite product). She also recommended several creams to round it out: a light and refreshing Antioxidant Facial Cream ($62) and a Sun-Protection System Oil Free SPF 45 sunscreen ($31) for when I’m out biking. After using these products for weeks, I can honestly say my face has become clearer, softer, and more radiant. This stuff works. After speaking with Amanda, patients are photographed using VISIA 3D-imaging technology that reveals layers of sun damage and cross references how your skin compares to other people your age. Colorado’s dry climate and high altitude mean that Coloradans’ skin ages faster than that of folks on the coasts or Midwest. It can feel a little depressing, but remember, you’re here for treatment. After your

image is recorded, you head back to the spa for treatments or to the dermatology side for procedures. Few people understand the range of procedures that dermatologists do. The Asarch Center offers over 100 treatments that touch on four distinct areas of skincare: prevention (most important in Colorado), nutritional, aesthetic, and procedural. Patients can receive eye bag reduction, blemish and cancer removal, facials, chemical peels, hair transplants, hair removal, and, of course, Botox. I’ll admit that my first association of Botox is upper middle class women and their fear of aging, but it turns out that people of all ages love Botox, and it’s used to treat tight necks and jaws, excessive sweat, migraines, and even an overactive bladder. The more I speak with Amanda the more I realize that many of my gay friends are probably using it. Arched eyebrows, after all, don’t just happen on their own. My own Botox treatment is surprisingly simple, both faster and less painful than getting tested for HIV. I grind my teeth at night, particularly after drinking, and since Botox is a muscle relaxant, many dentists prescribe it to prevent bruxism. Dr. Asarch pricks me twice in each cheek ($250), and ten days later, I’m no longer waking up with a tight jaw. The effects typically last for three months (so you could tie it to your testing schedule). If you would like to know more about the procedures offered at Asarch Center, you can reach them 303-761-7797. Based on your needs, a member of their call center will schedule you for an appointment at the dermatology side or the aesthetic side or both. And whether or not you one day try Botox, at least wear sunscreen. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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H E I N Z ES I G H T

FIXING BROKEN TOYS Brent Heinze, Senior Columnist MANY OF US PRIDE OURSELVES ON OUR ABILITY TO SOLVE PROBLEMS and fix things. In our daily lives, we are faced with many situations that we need to figure out. Most are simply things we need to accomplish because we are grownups, although many of them may take a significant amount of effort and dedication to figure out. These challenges can exist at work, when we deal with our finances, and at home. They also happen in our exchanges with other people in our lives. Sometimes they occur during casual contact while chatting someone up or with an individual that is an engrained part of our lives. There are times when these exchanges prove to take more energy from us than we are willing to give. Although these people can be hard to cut loose, some are more detrimental for us to engage with than to simply not have them as parts of our lives. I love the “broken toy” analogy when thinking about these types of people. Close your eyes and remember back to when you are a kid and one of your favorite toys breaks. You can use glue, tape, or skillful sewing techniques to effectively fix some of these mishaps. Of course there are other times where there is absolutely no hope. After melting a G.I. Joe in the microwave or cutting off Barbie’s hair, there is little you can do. Our relationships with challenging people can parallel the same ideas. Some are worth the time and effort to work through rough patches while others are better left to discard so you can make room for new ones. Trying over and over to fix these types of exchanges is often met with frustration and anger due to achieving limited success which is generally paired with a fair amount of drama. For all of the “fixers” that exist in the world, these broken toys can be an extremely frustrating. Often there is an imbalance in the amount of effort put into supporting someone. Offering a 10 percent investment in helping someone you care about is 44

AUGUST 03, 2016

“It takes two to tango and some people become somewhat addicted to trying to help others.” fantastic as long as they are putting in the remaining 90 percent by busting their ass and figuring things out. It is unrealistic to think that our lives ever change because we put a half-ass effort into making it better. The same happens in being there for other people. Offering a hand up is much different than throwing someone on your back and carrying them up a mountain. Supportive people are wonderful to have through difficult processes, but should not be expected to be the one that will fix everything. Most times, we have to work on fixing the broken parts of ourselves and shouldn’t expect others to do it for us. Of course it takes two to tango and some people become somewhat addicted to trying to help others. They may consciously or unconsciously feel a compulsion to take on people or situations as “projects.” It may come out of an honest sense of compassion and love to be there for other people or from a desire to be seen as a savior. Regardless of the reason for the internal drive, these situations can quickly spin out of control. They can bring negativity and destruction into our lives while pulling people away from being happy and productive. For those unique situations where we cannot completely distance ourselves from these individuals, we can choose to set limits, expectations, and boundaries so the negative impact on us can be more limited. Although it can be additionally challenging to stick to your guns with these people, it is one of the few ways not to bring more chaos and frustration into your exchanges with them. You have the ability to stop the insanity. It is rare that people have the power to take energy from us without our willingness to give it. Be careful about letting people empty your emotional bank account. It will leave you feeling broke, bitter, and exhausted. Let someone else try to fix these toys or encourage them to get the help they need to improve their lives.


NORTHERN COLORADO PRIDE OUTSIDE Despite cloudy skies and occasional downpours, Northern Colorado Pride OUTside was held at Civic Center Park in Fort Collins on July 23rd. The event featured live entertainment on the Kaiser Permanente main stage, community and vendor booths, Xfinity Kids Zone, Teen Space by SPLASH Youth Groups, local food trucks, and High Country Beverages. Photos by Charles Broshous

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H EA LT H I find this statement to be profoundly perceptive, especially as an adult struggling with depression, trying my best to adult my way through this overly demanding, unforgiving world. Don’t get me wrong: Adulting has its advantages. For example, I can gobble down an entire pint of fudge brownie gelato in the middle of the day after smoking a bowl, and there’s no one to stop me. I can masturbate just about anytime or anywhere in my apartment, and there’s no one to stop me. I can spend an entire day playing video games (naked, of course), and there’s no one to stop me. But the cruelty of being an adult is that when I’m busy adulting, I usually don’t have the time to do nothing. Even when I do have the time to waste, the world seems to delight in making me feel guilty for not being productive with that time — thanks in part to depression, which never misses an opportunity to make me feel bad. There’s the pressure of taking on more work or you won’t get that lucrative promotion. If you don’t study every single night in college, someone else will get the job. If you don’t exercise and graze on nothing but lettuce and twigs, you’ll get fat and die alone. Unfortunately, the freedom that comes with being an adult is fettered with endless responsibilities, irritating obligations, and other atrocious adulting necessities. And I’m not just talking about work, bills, and anal warts. The devil of adulting is in the details:

DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: WASTE MORE TIME Mike Yost THERE’S AN INSIGHTFUL CARTOON BY THE ARTIST BILL Watterson, creator of Calvin and Hobbes. The comic features a single panel of a lush forest populated with colorful flowers and trees. Calvin is speeding along a trail in a red flyer wagon with Hobbes sitting behind him. Hobbes mentions how quickly the summer has gone by, with Calvin adding, “There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.” 46

AUGUST 03, 2016

Getting up at 6am. Being stuck in traffic. Being stuck in traffic with a pounding hangover. Getting the runs from drinking too much coffee in a failed attempt to stay awake during the work day. Parking tickets. The DMV. Deadlines. Dentist appointments. Spending your one day off mowing the lawn, doing laundry, or fixing a broken water heater. (No wonder I’ve spent mornings standing in the shower with my head down, feeling the cold water hit the back of my skull while wondering what the hell I’m doing with my life.) It’s that horrible realization that at some point during all this adulting, I lost almost all of the free time I took for granted as a kid. What’s worse is that all those obligations are always waiting in the shadows, eager to devour every last second of my remaining free time. And all this pressure to be productive with every second of every day only exacerbates my depression. That’s precisely why I passionately guard my days of doing nothing, if only for my mental health. I love spending late afternoons walking through Cheesman Park, staring mindlessly at the passing clouds while listening to old Tangerine Dream albums in a set of comfy headphones. Take the time to do nothing before winter strips the trees bare of their leaves, covering the trails with a foot of snow. Cultivate more time to do nothing, and discover just how fulfilling doing nothing can be.


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O U T BAC K CLASSIFIEDS Envisioned by Boberto

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AUGUST 03, 2016


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BAC KWOR DS

ASK A SLUT [WARNING: GRAPHIC]

Dear Sluts, How do you feel your act reflects on the trans community? Signed, KAY T. LYNNE Bea: I feel that we’re a positive image for much of the community. After all, we represent many who don’t have Hollywood money to airbrush them into non-recognition.

Zoey: They don’t all get me, but those who do love me — kinda like straight girls.

LaTexa: I consider what the Sluts do as performance art, and like most art, many people don’t get it and many love what we do, regardless of whether they’re trans or not.

Cookie: I’m sorry, but being a performer in drag does not diminish anyone in the trans community. If you think what I do is affecting your transition, then get your panties or briefs that are in a bunch and leave the show. Can’t we all just love and support each other?

JackLynn: I sincerely hope the entire community, not just the trans community, learns to take themselves less seriously, except for LaTexa. That bitch needs to serious it up a little.

I’ve started dating this girl, and while she’s hot and smart, I’m not sure how to teach her about the little man in the boat? She’s too rough and there’s too much saliva, and I am afraid she will capsize the boat! Signed, WATERLOGGED Bea: I have a friend whose girlfriend is from Australia and she learned that the finger motion is actually counter clockwise, so check her background — maybe she’s from the other side 50

AUGUST 03, 2016

of the equator. As for the old man in the boat, get her a newer version of Moby Dick that’s not written by Melville.

Zoey: Don’t worry about the boat — worry about the shark. Time for you to top with a whale of a strap-on.

LaTexa: Play a little game of follow the leader while in the 69 position. Have her copy everything you do to her while you are doing it to her, and vice versa. Even you might learn a thing or two.

Cookie: Well Waterlogged, sometimes you have to be a tug boat and guide them in. Show her the ropes by guiding her through the channel. Give her a little nudge here and there. Instruct her. Hell, show her how it’s done by diving down below. Unless you’re the one that hates dining out, you have to communicate to her what she’s doing wrong.

JackLynn: Send her right over, I will teach her very well! Rough, sloppy ... sounds like she’s my type, not yours.

Is it true that size matters in lovers? Signed, LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT MAN Bea: That’s the oldest sex question, next to, “Was that good for you?” I look at it like real estate: If it feels right and you can see it appreciating in the next few years, then go for it. But remember, it’s the same amount of work either way.

Zoey: Are we talking diamonds or d*ck? Because yes, size matters.

LaTexa: Yes, size matters, the bigger the better! But then again, I’m a gaping hole of a slut! Just sayin’.

Cookie: YES. Don’t ever believe otherwise. If you don’t believe me, just ask Zoey.

JackLynn: Only if you’re talking d*ck size, then yes ... it matters.


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