CO LO R A D O'S LG B TQ M AGA ZINE | F R E E
CONTENTS APRIL 3, 2019 VOL42 NO25
Christopher La Fleur
6 SOLD DROPS NONBINARY BEATS IN THE MILE HIGH 9 CANDI CDEBACA IS BREAKING DOWN BARRIERS IN DISTRICT 9 12 TONY SMITH: CITY COUNCIL’S CHEERLEADER 16 DEBBIE ORTEGA IS STILL FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT 18 REFUGE IN STYLE: A CONVERSATION WITH CHRISTOPHER LAFLEUR 20 AMERICA’S SWEETHEART: DITA VON TEESE 26 THE BON VOYAGE COLLECTION: FUN, BODY POSITIVITY, AND MUCH-NEEDED ESCAPE 32 MEET THE UCHEALTH TEAM CONSOLIDATING TRANS HEALTHCARE 34 HEINZESIGHT: THE IMPORTANCE OF CONNECTION 36 WHERE HAVE THE CYCLE SLUTS BEEN? 42 APRIL ASTROLOGY: WHAT’S IN YOUR STARS? 41 DUELING WITH DEPRESSION: WOBBLE FABULOUSLY 4 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
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hrough the fogged-up windows of the RiNo bar Fort Greene, the sun sank behind the silhouette of the Rockies. Inside, a party raged on.
Sold rifled through crates filled with records, flitting between turntables and fist-pumping to the beat at brief respites.
Chicago-based DJ Sold visited for the weekend and was in the midst of delivering a furious and grooving three-hour set. Sold bounced from hard-hitting Chicago house to raving electro and choppy breaks, heating up the crowded bar on a chilly afternoon. Fellow Chicago native Kris Kuta hosts the daytime party series Sunday Laundry every-so-often at Fort Greene, importing the best DJs the Midwest has to offer to Denver’s dance floors.
Sold, who is nonbinary, now resides and DJs in Chicago, where they hold a residency at Smart Bar and are part of the party series Hugo Ball. Eris Drew, who is trans, founded the Hugo Ball party, taking the lead in reserving space for queer bodies on the dance floor. Dance music, club kid culture—whatever you want to call it—has always belonged to the queer community. The gritty, underground clubs serve as a sanctuary, a safe place for all orientations and identities.
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“Dancing is just communicating with your body,” Sold said. They studied linguistics and writing and compared dancing to writing, in that both are art forms meant to communicate to the world at large, as well as to oneself: I exist. “I lived up near Sunnyside, right off of—I’m not sure if I’m pronouncing it right; I could never tell while I was living here—Osage,” Sold said. They were living in Ohio when one day, “My boyfriend at the time was like, ‘Hey, wanna move to Denver?’ and six months later, we moved out here,” they said. Two months after arriving in Denver, Sold ended the relationship. “I was
working three jobs to pay rent, and he was just playing video games all day. I mean, I like video games and weed too, but I was earning the brunt of our income,” Sold explained. It was here in Denver that Sold began messing around with DJing. “I was into more U.K. funk and garage—that kind of music was big here. I started out doing stuff with TheHundred and was doing a series at Norad called ‘Momentum,’” they said, referencing the frequent bookings that took place in Denver circa 2012. “Back then, I was DJing under a different name: Tina Pizza." They looked back fondly on events thrown by the now-defunct techno collective, Communikey. Communikey, based in Boulder, held their final party in 2015 and was the main provider of techno music in Denver with a variety of different events and parties across the Front Range. They operated the Great American Techno Festival, bringing topnotch techno artists from around the world to Colorado for a weekend of raving parties and transcendent DJ sets. Describing Communikey’s Gemini party as the rave of all raves, Sold explained that the collective was an introduction to the spiritual experience of underground dance music. Held in the Rockies, right outside of Boulder,
Communikey’s parties embodied the spiritual experience that inevitably arises on the dance floor. After two years in Denver, however, Sold decided to move closer to their home state of Ohio. They were reluctant to leave at first, but Denver became nearly inhospitable toward the end for Sold. “It was a weird and dark time for me. I ended up having to get a restraining order against one of my best friends. It was a whole, f*cked up thing. He manipulated me into a sexual relationship, and he was being gross and weird about it, so I cut it off, and he assaulted me because of that. I starting coming out and telling people, and he started stalking me—I started getting all these weird and vaguely threatening emails.” Sold filed for a permanent restraining order, but lost the case. Instead, they were granted a temporary restraining order, which expired after four months. Sold left for Chicago before the restraining order could run out. However, Sold’s memories of Communikey parties lingered, even after the move, even after they stepped away from DJing. “When I moved to Chicago, I was really homesick for the mountains,” they said. Chicago, the birthplace of house music, had daunting expectations in terms of booking gigs.
“When I first moved to Chicago, I didn’t even think I would be able to DJ. I just kept thinking, ‘Oh, it’s going to be too hard. I have to quit.’ But, I just couldn’t. “I was a digital DJ with Traktor [a DJ program for PCs] and my laptop. I was told by, like, three different promoters, ‘We don’t book laptop DJs; you have to play on either CDJs or records.’” Sold didn’t have the financial means to buy the industry-standard CDJs. Instead, they bought a pair of “really cheap, sh*tty Numarks [a DJ controller for a laptop], like, bottom of the barrel,” for $100. Sold arrived in Chicago with a couple records they picked up from Twist and Shout during their time in Denver. Their collection quickly swelled to more than 2,200 records by their most recent count. “I was like, ‘'Guess I’m mixing on vinyl now,’ literally because that was what was affordable,” they said. “Definitely, over time, I’ve spent probably at least $10k on records. I could never go back. There’s just nothing that compares to playing records. There’s a whole concept I was introduced to via Eris and Justin of Hugo Ball. The idea is, with each use of playing them, practicing with them, carrying them, each record accrues a sort of mental or spiritual energy.” With each play and experience, the record becomes more intrinsically connected to the listener. The physical record becomes representative of the liberation the dance floor provides for so many trans, queer, and gendernoncomforming bodies. In a sense, the record itself serves as a symbol of all the spiritual experiences taking place through the art of dance. Sold’s set proved that the dance floor is a sacred space for self-expression, and as Sold gingerly danced behind the decks, the crowd danced the Sunday afternoon away. Flushed and sweaty, dancers grinned as they let go of insecurities and grooved to the sacred energy carried in Sold’s records. Through dance records and movement, pain melted away into ecstasy as the dance floor raged into the night. OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM
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Candi CDEBACA is Breaking Down Barriers in District 9
By Veronica L. Holyfield Photos by Gem Reul
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n the midst of an historic race, the public is listening to marginalized voices like never before, and Candi CdeBaca is one of the voices that is rising to the top. Born and raised in District 9, CdeBaca is aiming for a chair on Denver’s City Council, and if she wins, she would be the first ever LGBTQ woman of color to do so. As co-founder and executive director of Project VOYCE, a youth development and civic engagement organization, she has seen the waves of change wash over the city and is now proposing solutions and demanding an abrupt change in the direction that Denver is headed. Her campaign is rooted in intersectional representation and preservation of economic and governmental integrity, and while the pace of the city seems ever-changing, CdeBaca is certain that some things can remain intact.
an action research project to study why students weren’t engaging in extracurricular activities, and what they found was that most students didn’t want to engage, because they didn’t know if they were going to be in the neighborhood in a month or two. We realized that the root of disengagement was the housing insecurity that was being experienced in the neighborhood.
What issues do you see that are important to tackle?
What made you decide to run for city council?
The three prongs of my platform are housing and wages, traffic and pollution, and accountability and transparency. A lot of people would want to talk about each one of those things separately, but you can’t talk about housing without wages or traffic without pollution. We’re making sure there are complete conversations being had about the issues and root causes.
It was catalyzed by both living three blocks away from I-70 and being sucked into activism out of necessity because of my students at the nonprofit. They did
It’s really that intersectional approach to city building. We have to understand that, when we lift up the most marginalized groups in our society, everyone OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM
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of all programs, policies, and initiatives prior to implementation. Pay equity for women is a huge issue in the city as well; that’s something we have data on and have not effectively acted on.
How has the campaign journey been for you?
benefits. Everyone wins. Trickle-down economics do not work; they have failed over and over, and we have proof, but we know when we lift up the bottom, everyone benefits. Denver is a boom-and-bust town, and we’re following that pattern right now and have the opportunity to steer the ship in a different direction. It’s going to require us to wake up and pay attention to do that.
How do you hope to help women, people of color, and LGBTQ individuals if you’re elected? There has never been an LGBTQ Latina on Denver City Council, so I would be the first. My entire career as a social worker and a community activist has been devoted to lifting up the voices of marginalized groups. From the Women’s College at DU, to working for the federal government for people with disabilities, to working in our community with immigrant populations; it's in my DNA to do that work. This is a lever for change that I’m trying to press to see how far we can go in advancing the rights of marginalized groups.
What are some of the things you will make happen if you get elected? One issue is that our city doesn’t allow its employees to collectively bargain; that’s been a hot topic now with the teacher strikes. For me, that’s top-of-theline. Also, a lot of our development is coming at the expense of residents; the burden is not appropriately on the shoulders of the corporations; it has been shifted unfairly. Denver got rid of the inclusionary housing ordinance in 2016, and I would like to reinstate that. I would also like to implement racial equity programs or assessments at the city level, to make sure we are preemptively analyzing racial impacts 1 0 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
It’s hard, especially for someone like me, to be running, an LGBTQ woman of color coming from an impoverished background. There is a reason there are not more of us in these positions. It’s rigged; the game is set up, and if we don’t stand up to help each other, we are never going to have true representation. If we don’t have true representation, we’re never going to have policies that lift up our community the way we want them to.
What do you think are some of the biggest issues facing queer and marginalized folks today, and how can local government help? I feel like there are layers to the LGBTQ community, and I am happy that people are starting to take a more intersectional approach, because for a gay, white man, it’s a very different scenario than it is for a transgender, black youth. We often are not acknowledging the bigger issues of racism and classism, and in the LGBTQ community, it’s the same issues as the broader community. I think we just have to take a leadership role as a group that’s really experiencing multiple types of oppression and to stand up for our peers who are being oppressed.
What do you want to see your district and the city look like in five to 10 years? I would like it to be a more liveable city. I think that, right now, we are losing our character, our identity, our cultural richness and diversity that people moved here for. I want to see diversity economically, socially, racially, ethnically, but also affordable communities. I want us to be able to shift our behaviors from using cars to public transit, but that can’t happen until we have functional ecosystems where you can walk to the things you need to get to every day. Right now, because of environmental racism and because of concentrated power and wealth, we have concentrated resources. I would like to decentralize resources so that every neighborhood has equal access to what they need. I would like to see a cohesive plan for our city, for our streets, a more connected street grid, a plan for city we want 100 years from now, not just until the next election.
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Tony Smith
CITY COUNCIL’S CHEERLEADER By Veronica L. Holyfield Photos courtesy of Robins Photography
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or some, the desire to engage in civic leadership is learned, while in others, it is downright innate. Tony is running for city council District 10, and he thrives in roles where he is in the community, listening and connecting. For the last 18 years, he has been involved in countless committees and served on multiple boards, from areas as widespread as the Cultural Affairs Commission to the Governor’s Council on Physical Fitness. He previously worked for the Cherry Creek Arts Festival for 18 years and currently serves on the Commission on Aging and the Parks and Rec Advisory Board. With a sunny disposition and a vision of preserving neighborhood character, Smith is setting forth a plan to transform Denver into a model city of civic engagement. His energy and passion for seeing the needs of the community and his ability to connect people with the proper resources has Smith confident that he’s the correct choice for District 10.
What made you decide to run for city council? Without question, it started when so many other minorities and women were awakened, in November 2016. Prior to that, I served on various city commissions for the last 18 years, as well as the Cherry Creek Arts Festival, which was my full time job. I’ve always been 1 2 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
a great community organizer, but then November 2016 happened, and a lot of us woke up, and I immediately realized that there are many people that we need to listen to. For me, that also represents not just having a connection to, but feeling represented in local government, and that’s where it really starts. That is what really pushed me to consider running for office; it will always be about serving our community, bringing people together, and getting things done.
What issues do you see that are important to tackle? My top three issues are affordable housing, neighborhoods, and wellbeing. Affordable housing is number one; we’ve got to build more houses. We have a housing deficit of about 150,000 needed homes in Denver, but we also have 20,000 vacant apartments in town because people can’t afford them. Then, it’s neighbors first. What that means to me is taking care of everyone that is in our district first. The full diversity from, of course, an ethnicity point of view, but also from an age point of view, an economic point of view, and then, for me in particular, it’s about all of our LGBTQ community members. It’s also self-care; I’m a yogi, and I want to have fitness festivals that have elements of our own existing programs, like Parks and Rec. They’re putting on all these amazing programs, but a lot of people don’t know about it. One of those is My Denver Card, which is free to people under 18 and gives free access to Rec Centers. It’s exactly what Michelle Obama’s Let’s Move campaign was about.
How do you hope to help marginalized people, including women, people of color, and LGBTQ individuals, if you’re elected? By being someone that people can talk to, someone that is willing to listen and respond. I’ll always be constructive; I’m known to be a very positive person. It’s neither red nor blue; it’s friendship. I also know, as someone inside the community,
there’s a dramatic difference between all the L’s, the G’s, the B’s, the T’s, and the Q’s. Denver has never had a gay man serve on city council, and being a member of the LGBTQ community, that makes me instantly accessible.
you for running for office; that must take courage. Thank you for wanting to represent us in government.’ When I hear those people express gratitude, it really makes me want to continue on my journey.
Also, I’m half Filipino, and we’ve never had an Asian on council. We all need to feel represented at the local level; every one of us needs to see ourselves in some form or fashion in local government representing us. I’m not running as a gay man as part of my platform; it’s just a fact. But, it’s about that representation piece; that’s so, so important to me.
There are a record-breaking 60 people running for 13 city council positions, and every chance I get with the other candidates, I say, ‘We already won.’ We are becoming better residents of our own districts, because we’re learning about all the different areas in our community; we’re learning what is important to them and how we can advocate for them at the city council level.
What are some of the things you will make happen if you get elected?
I could not do this, without question, without the support of my husband. He has been the absolute best cheerleader that one could ever ask for.
With regards to my platform being connecting, engaging, and serving, it’s about being innovative and putting out the amazing programs that are out there. I feel like a Filipino trait is bringing people together; it all started with my mother throwing Filipino disco parties, and she taught me to not just bring people together but to celebrate diversity. Another Filipino trait is remembering when people need something, and there’s so many opportunities that I’ve seen for that in the city of Denver, serving on all these committees. There are a lot of dots that we can connect. Neighbors are a part of my platform and taking care of neighbors in the neighborhood. With regards to our homeless population, I am absolutely against Initiative 300. That is not the correct solution for our homeless; there are so many nonprofit organizations that are also against it.
How has the campaign journey been for you? Oh my God; capital, bold OMG! I have felt so grateful to be running for office. Wow, it gives me chills. It has been 80 percent exhilarating and life changing and maybe 17 percent ‘What did I get myself into?’ because your life is on display. But, so many times along the journey, the universe has had people come up to me and just simply say, ‘Thank
What do you think are some of the biggest issues facing queer and marginalized folks today, and how can local government help? Certainly, part of my platform is to be proactive and not reactive. Definitely something that I can help do from a city council point of view is identify some gaps and bring organizations together instead of doing double work. There are so many great organizations in the city that can be connected, but that will take someone with energy, passion, and an ear to the ground for those kinds of values.
What do you want to see your district and the city look like in five to 10 years? I want people to feel connected, that they’ve got a city that is working their hardest to serve them. I believe cities exist to enable us to live our very best lives; it is not working against us; it really is working for us. I want people to know, more than ever, that they are living in the best city in the United States. Maybe in 20 years, I can imagine a city with free transportation. I love that BRT (Bus Rapid Transit) is going to hit Colfax, and I love the evolving transportation infrastructure. OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM
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Debbie ORTEGA IS STILL FIGHTING
THE GOOD FIGHT
By Addison Herron-Wheeler Photo courtesy of Debbie Ortega
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or Debbie Ortega, politics and daily life go hand-in-hand She got started in the local political game at the age of 17, before she could even legally vote. Now, she’s looking to be reelected for her third and final term as a City Council Member At-Large. Ortega took some time out of her busy schedule to outline her plans for the future and reflections on the past.
How did you get started in politics, and what brought you to Denver? My interest in politics is from when I was on student council in middle school, when I first moved here from New Mexico. We moved here from a small town, because my stepdad had a construction business, and he was looking for more work. I’ve been in politics for a long time now. Once I get reelected, which I am confident I will be, I will be the only person to ever match Cathy Reynolds’ Denver City Council record. 1 6 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
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What will you do to support LGBTQ folks, specifically trans folks, people of color, and low-income people? Since I’ve been a councilperson, I have historically had a staff person who was either gay or lesbian, but I never looked at them in that light; I hired them because they were the best for the job, and I will continue to do that. I was one of the original co-sponsors of our equal protection ordinance.
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I am on a board for projects that provide housing for people with AIDS, and a lot of my projects have been specific to serving LGBTQ folks. I participate in gay Pride; I’ve been on the board of Mile High Behavioral Health, and they have an LGBTQ program that works with youth. For the last four or five years, I have ridden with them on the float in the Pride parade.
What do you think are some of the biggest issues facing Denver right now? Traffic congestion, affordable housing, and I think the lack of vary clear and focused vision around some of the growth that is happening. I know, as a city, we have been working on revisions to Blueprint Denver, so that will allow the opportunity to look into the future. It’s a plan for the next 20 years, similar to the plan that was adopted in 2003, and it deals with growth and traffic management and how to do it in a thoughtful way that doesn’t continue to exacerbate mobility issues.
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I think the issue of economic prosperity for some of our low-income communities is critically important, which is why our work on the I70 pipeline is so key. There is a program called worknow.org that the city is utilizing to put infrastructure in place for construction projects, so that should help as well.
When you finally do get to slow down and take time away from public service work, what will you do? I’m working on trying to get my dual citizenship from where my mother’s parents were born, a small town in Italy, because I want to travel throughout Europe and finally meet my mother’s family that was left behind when my grandma and grandpa moved, and do the same with my dad’s roots in Spain. I have a couple of grandkids in the Navy—one is getting ready to go into the Air Force, and there is one in Japan and one in Cuba—so I would love to go visit them. I’ll probably continue to be actively involved in one way or another in local government, and I have hobbies. I make jewelry and salsas; I enjoy bike riding on our trail systems, so I am going to try and stay really active. I’m not sure what that will look like yet, and right now I am focusing on this election, but I’m excited to see what the next chapter brings.
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Is there anything else you’d like to add? I would love to have this one last term, and I’ve been very blessed by the citizens to be given this opportunity to serve the city. I do it with passion and compassion, and I’m just trying to be that voice of community. I think the voice of community in everything we do is critically important to the votes that I take in and the role that I play.
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Refuge in Style
A CONVERSATION WITH
Christopher LA FLUER By Zach Blue Images courtesy of the Inertia collection by Christpher La Fleur
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ore and more, queerness and art are colliding in new ways, as queerness collides with culture at large. These paradigms in art and perspectives of artists are changing our artistic landscape, visible here in Colorado. Christopher La Fleur is a queer visual artist living and working in Denver. His first public installation, Inertia, was displayed at the Denver Tech Center. We sat down with La Fleur to talk about art, queerness, and the philosophy of designing his life for art and for the benefit of others.
In your online bio, you mentioned that from a young age, you “made art a refuge.” I’d like to hear more about that. School was extra, in all the bad ways. I grew up in a very conservative community, Greeley, Colorado, which is red-blooded, meat-eating, conservative country. So, I was always the awkward kid. It took me a very long time to grow into my personality, into my body, into everything. And I was bullied a lot. So, this extroverted, wild person that I am now, that didn’t exist. 1 8 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
And when I was in the seventh grade, a truck, just like a big huge country truck, pulled over while I was walking down the street in broad daylight, and these people jumped out of the car, beat me up, left me on the road, and drove away. That was my first experience with, ‘Life sucks; it’s really hard, so design it for yourself.’ And it was kinda like that all through high school, where I found more comfort in being in creative writing classes and being in the art classroom. I was in the art club, and I would hang out there. All the other boys would be out playing sports, and they’d be super popular, prom king, everything. And I would find my tribe in the arts.
How would you say your identity as a queer person has affected your refuge, your art? Honestly, you have to own every single thing about yourself. You can’t change it; this is your life; own it; design it; make it work for you. And when you do that, you are gonna stand out, you’re gonna attract people to you. For me, queerness doesn’t necessarily manifest explicitly in my art. Queer subject matter, and subject matter of diversity in general, isn’t necessarily something that I tackle head-on with imagery you might expect.
You mentioned you try to have a diverse range of techniques and styles earlier. My primary focus right now is painting: doing large-scale, two -dimensional installations, vivid colors, and brash expressions. For me, it’s almost like you don’t have much control over what you create, because what you’re ‘creating’ already exists; it has a spirit of its own, and you’re animating it; you’re bringing that ghost in the shell to life.
Tell me about your art-making process; how does inspiration turn into art for you? For me, it’s not about inspiration, it’s exploration. I would encourage every artist to not sit around and wait for that lightning bolt of inspiration. You need to build it into your day and make one thing with your hands every single day. Continue to work that muscle, and explore new frontiers. You don’t have to make a single painting every day. It can be the loosest sketch. And I keep sketchbooks; I keep journals; I keep everything everywhere. So, that inspiration can come from anywhere. As for my process, a lot of times it starts with, like, I’ll be having a conversation with somebody, like we’re talking now. And an idea will stick in my head, and I’ll chew on it for weeks. I tend to sit on things for two weeks, three weeks, really look at it from every angle, and then contextualize it. Where do I imagine this is gonna go? How do I want people to feel when they’re around it? And what am I trying to say? And from there, it kind of devolves again. You get to that magic place where you’re like, ‘OK, great. I have this awesome idea, and it’s fully formed; I’ve looked at it a million different ways,’ now take it all apart again and get super weird and super funky and experimental with it. A lot of my favorite projects in my whole adventure here were completely accidental. So, then it becomes experimental, and you’re just f*cking around, and you’re trying to see things that work. And along that way, something’s gonna click. It doesn’t immediately click, and almost always, this initial image you had in your head, it almost never works out. From expectation to reality, you’re going to find so much magic along that way, and it’s gonna be 50 times better than you ever thought it was gonna be.
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America’s Sweetheart
DITA VON TEESE By Denny Patterson Taken from Gay Times April 2019 issue Photographer: Franz Szoni
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A
s one of the world’s most famous burlesque performers, Dita Von Teese is the definition of sexy and glamour. Providing a magical and sensual experience to mesmerized audiences, it’s no wonder her shows are constantly sold out. No one can resist her dazzling style and grace. Starting as a pinup model in the early 90s, Dita is credited with re-popularizing the burlesque art form which was once considered to be taboo. Channeling the Golden-Era, vintage style, Dita is also a fashion icon who has been featured in several magazines, including Playboy and Vanity Fair, and now OUT FRONT! We had the pleasure of chatting more with the Queen of Burlesque about her career and upcoming projects. Don’t worry folks; she has no time to take off her nipple tassels anytime soon. There is a lot more to come.
When was the precise moment you knew burlesque was the career you wanted to pursue? I’m not sure I ever had that moment, because I feel like my career has sort of been a snowball effect since doing my first show in like 92. I think it wasn’t until 2000 when I sort of felt like this could be a real job. I was finally getting mainstream recognition, and it allowed me to look at it more as a job than a hobby. Up until then, I started as a pinup model in the early 90s and as a fetish and Bettie Page model, and I just kind of had the idea of looking and researching all the pinup art and magazines from, like, the 1930s and 40s. A lot of girls posing for pinups were also burlesque dancers, so I had the idea of doing the same thing.
You are frequently dubbed the Queen of Burlesque by the media. What did you think when you first heard that term used to describe you? You know, I thought about this book I have called The Queens of Burlesque. I never thought of it like I am the queen everything, but to me, it just seems like a classic term to describe the queens of burlesque, the women who came before me. It’s a really nice thing for me, and it makes me always be conscientious of how I speak about burlesque and everything I do. You can never make everyone happy, but I really try to speak conscientiously about burlesque and what it means to a lot of different people. 2 2 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
Since you are also known as a sex symbol by being in Playboy, Vanity Fair, and other fetish magazines, how do you own your sexiness? I am like a dishwater blonde from a farming town in Michigan, and when I grew up, I wanted to be a lady. It wasn’t until I started understanding more that I wanted to be like the femme fatale. The woman to be desired, to be objectified even, dare I say, which is really taboo to say, but I think it is interesting that we are living in a time where we can indulge in taboos and liberate them.
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What upcoming projects should we be on the lookout for? I am really into my new app right now. I’m sure people are sick of me talking about it on Instagram, but I love having, like, a little, private glamour club where I can do live videos from my home. I recently did one, a tour of my famous shoe closet and hat closet, and I show people around my house and what I am doing at photoshoots. I can do that on Instagram, but I like having a private place where there are no trolls and everyone can be involved in a positive way. I also have my lingerie line, which I am always working on; then there is my striptease candle and fragrance called Scandalwood. Those are fun. The candle is big and has a picture of me in a long evening gown and gloves. When the candle heats up, the dress falls off. The candle cools down; the dress comes back on again. Then I am working on my new book, which is like the follow up of my Beauty Mark book. That will be out next year.
Lastly, what is something not many know about Dita Von Teese? I can be like, ‘Yes, I am going to do this photoshoot where I am tied up, ball -gagged, with somebody’s boob in the picture.’ Like, I decided to do this, and it’s OK. It’s consensual. We are living in a time where we can indulge in things that maybe other people will not agree with. One person will be appalled by some of our ideas, and others will embrace them.
Burlesque is very popular within the queer community. How would you say the burlesque renaissance is married to the drag renaissance? I have all these VHS tapes and video collections of Bettie Page and Tempest Storm and other burlesque stars and pinup models dancing around in the footage, and one of the things in all of these videos, which took place at burlesque and cabaret shows in the 50s, there was always a female impersonator in them. I think there has always been a parallel with drag queens and female impersonators that performed burlesque. I think Violet Chachki put a spotlight on performing burlesque in a big way on Drag Race, and that really opened the floodgates. Suddenly, everybody wants to do a burlesque or strip tease, but I think she was the first one that did classic burlesque acts on a world stage and got recognized for it. I remember so well, the Drag Race people called me saying they had a girl on the show who was competing and that she really loves me, and they hoped I could make a little good luck video for her. I ended up not doing it because I couldn’t find any good lighting at the time, and I’m not filming myself on my phone. 2 4 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
Oh gosh, I never know what’s interesting. I guess people are always surprised to know that I am a good cook. They are surprised to know how hands-on I am with my work. As for absurd things that people don’t know about me, well, I love saving my leftovers. I am a leftovers fanatic. I am constantly squirreling away food. I remember feeling like a kindred spirit with Vivienne Westwood once when we went out to dinner to a fancy restaurant, and there were a few scraps of food left on the table, and she insisted on taking it home. She put the doggie bag in the basket of her bicycle and pedaled off into the night.
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The Bon Voyage
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Collection:
Fun, Body Positivity, and Much-Needed Escape
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By Addison Herron-Wheeler Photos by Alejandro Brito Models: Oliver Buendia, Amaia Izar, Alejandro Cifo, Thomas Busson
S
o often, queer culture is about showing up and standing up for political and social rights and against injustices. And that’s all extremely important—but also extremely tiring. Self-care seems to be the 2019 buzzword, and we all need time to compress and reset, even if we are fighting the good fight every day. That’s where ES Collections’ Bon Voyage swimwear line comes in. The folks behind the line are all about expanding into more sizes, styles, and gender presentations, and they donate clothing and money to good causes. But they also recognize that sometimes, we need to slip into something a little more comfortable and hit the beach. We chatted up Nir Zilberman, U.S. agent for ES Collection, about the new line, what it stands for, and when it’s appropriate to just take a damn vacation.
Talk to us about this exciting new collection and what makes it unique. Well, at first, people would complain that what we made was too ‘sexy’ and only in small sizes, but now this is for everyone; it’s not just an L.A. collection. It’s really important to me that it doesn’t matter what state you’re in; even someone from the most conservative state can find something here.
So, what was the inspiration behind the Bon Voyage Collection? Every season, we change the theme, and this year, we decided to call it Bon Voyage. It’s about taking a vacation, an escape from politics. Sometimes you just need to run away and enjoy life, nature, everything around you; this collection goes from very wild and fun and sexy to conservative. People of all ages can wear it. If someone is worried the collection looks too ‘young,’ there is something for them, too. 2 8 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
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It’s so important to just take that time for self-care. Yes! And time off from all the pressure, the work, take care of yourself, relax and enjoy, whether you are 20 or 50. We forget to take care of ourselves. we wanted people to know, especially the gay community, that it’s OK to take time off, go and have fun, enjoy the world,. This is what we need, and if you actually look at the collection, it’s very gay-forward. It’s masculine, but you don't feel uncomfortable. Say you're in Colorado and you want to go to Vegas or India; you can go and feel comfortable with just these pieces.
Why do you think that’s so important, specifically for queer people? Our community is in constant battle, and not just in the U.S., but all over the world. We’re fighting against several countries where homosexuality is still against the law, primarily in the Middle East, Africa, and the Caribbean. Then there’s Russia and the anti-LGBTQ Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro. It’s never-ending. But every 3 0 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
once in a while, the community needs to stop and reflect on the achievements we have made. We need to enjoy what our predecessors have given to us, the rights they have won for us.
That’s very true; there’s a lot of work to still do, but if we aren’t stopping to enjoy it, what is it all for? Exactly. We deserve to celebrate our accomplishments, especially this year, as it is the 50th anniversary of Stonewall and the start of the LGBTQ rights movement.
How do you specifically let the queer community know that these products are for them? We design the collection in response to what is going on in the community. I remember a few years ago, we had a collection that was all about our DNA, because at the time, the government was telling the community we were not good enough to serve in the military.
We were good enough to fight and die at wartime, but not good enough to be in service during times of peace. We wanted to speak out on that, and we did, with a collection that was much darker than Bon Voyage. We chose to go in a more hopeful direction this season with bold, fun, colorful prints, and fashionforward cuts and designs that specifically appeal to the gay community. We also included many rainbows. The collection is meant to inspire people in the community to laugh and have fun.
What are your plans for the future? Anything cool you want to announce? From the beginning, it has always been important for ES Collection to align with charities that support HIV, AIDS, gay marriage ... We continue to do so, and I can say with confidence that as long as we are in business, ES Collection will never stop supporting and giving to organizations that fight for LGBTQ equality. We see the LGBTQ community as one shared voice, and we must fight for equality together.
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2/25/19 11:37 AM
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MEET THE
UCHEALTH TEAM
Consolidating Trans Healthcare
By Addison Herron-Wheeler
O
ne of the most daunting things for trans folks is going to the doctor. OBGYN care often leads to trans men being misgendered; psychiatrists aren’t a safe space as often as they should be, and in general, trips to the doctor can mean shame, fear, and distress instead of health and healing. As a result, too many trans folks don’t see care providers as often as they should The UCHealth Integrated Transgender Program aims to change that. “We wanted a model of care for trans individuals where all the specialties were in one place,” explained Doctor Robert Davies, associate professor of psychiatry and medicine. “A place where patients could come in and see numerous providers from varying specialties all in the same visit, so that we could coordinate and facilitate access to care. I think we discovered several years ago that there were a number of us from different specialties doing our own things. Working with trans individuals, it 3 2 \\ A P R I L 3 , 2 0 1 9
is very hard to coordinate care between specialties It puts a lot of pressure on the patient to seek out care from transfriendly or trans-informed providers.” While endocrinology usually refers to the process of studying hormones, the clinic is so much more than just hormone therapy. In addition to looking at how hormones interact with other medicine, prescription or otherwise, they also try and include as many other providers in the same place so that trans folks can get all of the help they need. Currently, they offer an internist to work with patients on the care they need, an OBGYN, a psychiatrist, and general care. They also make it a point to keep the clinic a gender-neutral setting. “With the ACA passing and more of our patients getting Medicaid, as well as some of the regulations around improving access, lack of access to care, restrictions to trans healthcare, and discrimination, we were seeing a lot more patients coming into our system
who are actually seeking out affirmative care,” explained Dr. Rita Lee, associate professor at the University of Colorado School of Medicine. “We specifically selected this model to make it easier for people to get access to the care they need.” In addition to offering this clinic, the providers who are a part of it are attempting to provide trainings throughout the hospital so that all the care providers there know how to treat trans patients. They still realize that the idea of going to a care provider who isn’t specifically part of a trans clinic can be daunting, however, so they are making it a point to have as many clinic hours as possible. “There have also been some recent changes within our electronic medical records recently that actually make it a lot easier for patients to express their preferences about how they prefer to be called and their pronouns, and the staff really needed some training in that,” Dr. Lee said. “So, we’ve been really trying
to help people understand why this is important and to be respectful of our patients.” In addition to making it easier for trans folks to get all their care at once without fear of shame or stigma, another reason to combine the clinic is because, through this unification, the doctors are able to see patients together and look at their problems from all different perspectives. It’s common for several doctors at once to sit down with a patient, with one focusing on the patient’s mental health, another thinking about how hormones may be affecting them, and another asking about their energy levels due to a gynecological issue. “I think, part of what’s unique about our clinic is, it’s a very holistic approach to the patient,” said Dr. Micol Rothman, co-founder of the program. “Because we’re really trying to take into account all the different needs in terms of mental health, primary care, and hormonally what’s going on, this can be a time of a lot of questions for patients and families. So, we feel like by having all these different providers, we’re kind of hitting things from different sides, and really, hopefully giving holistic care.” “I think the approach is about more than just the hormones,” she added. “It’s really about the patient and the transition and
everything that goes along with that, and trying not to just take care of each of our own specialties, but really thinking about the patient as a whole.” “I think, from the clinical side, we’ve developed a really strong program, bringing in the different specialties to treat the patients within this setting,” Dr. Sean Iwamoto said. “We are working with a medical student to get some patient perspectives on this model of care, which is, as we’ve said, very unique. And we are interviewing those patients by phone, getting feedback directly from, you know, in their words about what they’ve liked, what they would like to see improved.” In addition to all this work, the clinic is also working on doing some more research to better understand hormones and the interactions between hormone treatments and medications when it comes to trans patients. While the clinic is still only open two days a month, they strive to provide the best care possible while they are open and serve the trans community the healthcare they’ve seriously been lacking. “Often, trans patients tend not to seek out preventative care and have overall worse health outcomes,” Dr. Rothman added. “With the option to come here, we’re hoping that changes.”
Left to right: Dr. Rita Lee (Internal Medicine), Dr. Patricia Huguelet (OB/GYN), Dr. Micol Rothman (Endocrinology), and Dr. Robert Davies (Psychiatry).
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HEINZESIGHT
The Importance of Connection By Brent Heinze
I
n a world of using technology for social networking and other forms of cyber communication, many of us are hungry for physical contact. As humans, we crave connection and can get that somewhat through electronic means, but it does not necessarily feed our soul. As we become more physically and emotionally disconnected in our society, we risk losing a part of our humanity and those aspects that make us enjoy our lives. Showing affection, touching, and eye contact seem like normal parts of living but can cause significant discomfort and send some people running for the hills. Unfortunately, there are a number of people who feel more confident communicating behind a screen then they do in person. Others struggle with receiving physical or emotional attention or affection from others. Instead of facing their discomfort, some choose to remain hidden away from others and locked behind their technology to communicate safely, comfortably, and alone. Connecting with people who are likeminded and enrich our lives is important. It can provide friendship, comfort, support, love, and assistance when needed. People can celebrate with us when great things happen and help to pick us up when situations are rough. Sometimes, it’s just nice to have good people around us for companionship. As we get older, it becomes more apparent how short life truly is. There are people we care about who die unexpectedly or experience life changes where they may move away from us. Other times, relationships simply fade away or get put on hold due to circumstances. For whatever reason, we may not call, text, or make
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plans to meet up with people in our lives. So many opportunities are lost when we don’t take time to spend with people in the physical realm. Sitting across from someone having a drink and laughing can be so much more enjoyable then typing “LOL” on a screen or sending your most recent favorite meme from Facebook. Looking into someone’s eyes as you touch their arm can be more fulfilling then a video chatting exchange. Without true connection and affection, many of us risk feeling lonely, isolated, and unloved. There are absolutely times where electronic communication is an amazing substitute for being in someone’s physical space. Sometimes geography or timing are significant barriers that can stop people from connecting with each other. Thankfully, there are amazing, high-tech tools at our disposal that can help us overcome these challenges. If getting in front of someone physically isn’t possible, think about how to make the electronic engagement as meaningful as possible. When you send messages, it is important to think about the intentions and emotions behind the words that are typed. As we translate feelings and ideas electronically, think about why we are doing this and what we are attempting to convey to them. Chatting with someone online or expressing that we strongly care for someone is more than just a digital transmission of data. It is about passing on messages that are important to us as we attempt to connect with another individual, and it should be valued, not mindlessly sent. Think about your intentions instead of just responding without much thought.
Many people also feel that technology is causing a rapid decline in our ability to socialize effectively in person. We can’t act like some people do online. It is not socially acceptable to walk up to someone and show images of your junk. You can’t block someone in the real world because they annoy or antagonize you. Unfortunately, some people find online behaviors to be more comfortable than ones that are common in the physical world. Some have difficulties talking to people face-to-face, but also may be losing the ability to engage with in-person behaviors like flirting with others and picking up when someone wants to engage with us or wants us to go away. It is important that we know how to engage with people and work on connecting with them. It doesn’t matter if it is surface-level conversation or the beginning of a wonderful friendship. Being able to carry on an ongoing communication is extremely important. Maybe we weren't raised with being in a super affectionate home where hugs and kisses were part of our usual lives. Some families struggle with saying that they love each other or have gone through traumatic situations that stop them from showing vulnerabilities. Regardless of how we grew up, think about how we want to be treated as well as treating others. It is important that we tell the people in our lives that we love and care about them. It doesn’t have to be a super-dramatic exchange with lots of strong emotions, but it is important. You can keep it simple. Just reach out and express what you are feeling. We don’t risk much by actually telling someone that we like them or giving them a big bear hug.
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WHERE HAVE THE CYCLE SLUTS BEEN? Where have the Sluts been? •MAE D’MISTAKE: Well, after the alien abduction and probing, the sluts [information redacted]. •WINNIE BEGO: Personally, for me, I have been on a long,extended stay at the Betty Ford Clinic. •JACK-LYNN HYDE: What do you mean? Where have you been? What did you hear? •ZOEY DIDDIM: Drinking. Lots of drinking. •KAY HAUSENSUES: The free clinic. They were so nice there. •COOKIE FORTUNA: We are here and there and everywhere... Muah hahahahahahaha! •CHERRI CHOLA: I moved from the alley near M Uptown to the dumpster behind Dulce Vida.
What events can we see you at this year? •MAE D’MISTAKE: Bingo at Dulce Vida, Cherri will be performing behind the dumpster. •WINNIE BEGO: Please join us each month for our charity of the month and support local organizations. •JACK-LYNN HYDE: All the same things you saw us at last year, unless you want a private show. Email or text us; we can do private shows! •ZOEY DIDDIM: Our monthly bingo, but also supporting other organizations helping the community. •KAY HAUSENSUES: Pride! •COOKIE FORTUNA: Come play with us at our monthly bingo game, but we will also be at PrideFest. Look for our bike rally, too, in July. •CHERRI CHOLA: All you have to do is follow the glitter trails or our website. We make stalking easy.
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I noticed that the ladies in the group have mustaches. Why is that, and do they offer mustache rides? •MAE D’MISTAKE: Wait... you found ladies? Where??? •W I N N I E BEGO: Where else would we add the glitter? Oh wait, I do always glitter my nether-regions. •JACK-LYNN HYDE: ...and beard rides and eyebrow rides and muff rides, rides for everybody, rides all around! •ZOEY DIDDIM: TEE HEE HEE, you said Ladies!!! •KAY HAUSENSUES: I don't have a mustache. Was someone offering mustache rides? I want one. •COOKIE FORTUNA: There ain't no ladies here. Nothing to see here. •CHERRI CHOLA: There are no ladies, but we do like giving rides of any kind... as long as you make a charity donation.
By the Cycle Sluts
What essentials should a slut always carry in her purse? • M A E D ’ M I STA K E : Phone charger, glitter, skeleton key, ouija board, gum, and list of names of people who have wronged me and should be punished. You know, the usual. •WINNIE BEGO: 1. Extra Glitter, 2. English Brand Poppers, 3. A fan, 4. Pig Sweat Poppers. •JACK-LYNN HYDE: Well I always carry lube, and condoms, yeah. •ZOEY DIDDIM: Lipstick, cash, and lube. One must be ready for anything that may pop up! •KAY HAUSENSUES: Eyelash glue, glitter, condoms, and a lipstick vibe. •COOKIE FORTUNA: Everything but the kitchen sink. That damn thing is too heavy to carry. •CHERRI CHOLA: Extra balloons for boobs, bottle of Iron Horse, flogger, rope, and cell phone.
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Dueling with Depression:
WOBBLE FABULOUSLY Column and photo by Mike Yost Shut up! What did I do? I’m not talking to you. Are you talking to the readers? That’s really rude, and you know they can’t hear you, right? Sorry. I’m just yelling at my stupid brain. My mind is racing with thoughts again, and it won’t shut off. Your brain is bubbling with voices galore? A cacophony of voices! All of them analyzing and examining and judging me like a gaggle of vinegary teachers sitting in a circle inside my skull, pointing their crooked fingers at me while criticizing every decision I make with my life.
How can there be no how? “The chores of everyday life," writes Alan Watts, “they become intolerable when everything ties together, all the past and future, you feel it dragging at you every way ... when we wake up in bed on Monday morning and think of the various hurdles we’ve got to jump that day. Immediately, we feel sad and bored and bothered, whereas actually, we’re just lying in bed.” We seriously need to have a discussion about your obsession with Alan Watts quotes. And trying to not think about the sh*t job won’t help the fact that you have a sh*t job. But not thinking about the sh*t job in the morning frees up some brain bandwidth to just enjoy your coffee for a few minutes. Constantly rerouting your thinking from the past or the future to the present sounds exhausting. All this to save brain bandwidth? It’s not about working to clear your mind from thinking. And is it really necessary to think about all that’s wrong with your life while you take a hot shower? I’m just trying to figure out how to be happy. I’ll even take being content. And does it help?
Well, you don’t have any money and live in a tiny apartment.
About as much as yelling at the voices to shut up.
Don’t you start! I love my tiny apartment, and money is overrated.
And this doesn’t mean you completely stop thinking about finding a different job. It just means you refuse to cling to a future that hasn’t happened yet—a future in your head that generates a painful emotional fallout in the present.
Does yelling at these cantankerous teachers in your head help at all? Not really. Then ... why? Because, I’m f*cking frustrated! Calm. Stay calm.
When really you’re just lying in bed. Like watching a play and nudging the spotlight to illuminate a different part of the stage.
Wouldn’t that drive YOU crazy?
Focusing on what’s happening presently rather than how sh*tty I feel because of my sh*t job or my depression.
Take slow, deliberate breaths.
Or what MIGHT happen.
What else is there to do but yell back at the constant cavalcade of thoughts? My mind always worrying about what might happen or ruminating about bad decisions—all while trying to be mindful.
But all those disastrous futures might happen!
Just focus on your breathing. But I’m really not being mindful at all, am I? Because I’m thinking about how I need to be f*cking mindful while drowning in a deluge of thinking! Just focus on the present, like watching a passing cloud. Then I try to stop thinking about how to be mindful and be more present in the moment without leaning on hackneyed, clichéd platitudes on how to be more present in the moment! But, if thinking is part of the problem, doesn’t it stand to reason that thinking might also be part of the solution?
It’s about working to compartmentalize your various hurdles and challenges and neuroses. But when you’re tired, just sleep. When you’re hungry, just eat. That’s what everybody does. Nope. Most people eat while thinking about all the various hurdles they have to overcome after they’re done eating. They rarely ever eat at all. A Chinese Zen master by the name of Yun-men stated, “In walking, just walk. In sitting, just sit. Above all, don’t wobble.” But what if I wobble fabulously? Now you’re getting the point!
Just think positive thoughts, right? That cures depression and anxiety. I feel better already. You’re a damn genius. You should write a self-help book and make a sh*t-ton of money telling people how to be mindful. It’s not about finding the right method of thinking or the right meditation. It’s about not thinking, but not thinking about a method that leads to not thinking. But HOW do you do that? There is no HOW. Thinking about how to be present while you’re eating your breakfast burrito smothered in green chili pulls you away from that wonderful experience, does it not?
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April Astrology
What ’s in Your Stars? By Joshua Lionlight
ARIES: A relationship or intimate conversation is wanting
to unfold for you! Be encouraged to forgive, and leave hurtful words behind. Holding on to wrongdoings will only hold the relationship back. A partnership is coming in to help restore balance and take you on a favorable conquest.
TAURUS: There is an eager attempt to capture your attention! In order for your worldly success to grow, you must first cater to your emotional needs. Give yourself some quiet time this month to listen to your thoughts of worth and bodily cravings. Making a personal investment looks positive, giving you some security.
GEMINI: If you’ve been feeling confused and stumped
lately, set aside more time to process and weigh your thoughts. You are being encouraged to slow down this month. Answers will come when you surrender. It will prove to be more beneficial if you hold steadfast rather than shift on impulse. Practice mindful meditation!
CANCER: A recent decision, rule, or structure has been
put into place that may be throwing you off. It will feel more together once you really open yourself up to the possibilities. Someone is taking charge. Avoid giving too much too soon. There’s no need to stress over what is lost. Clarity rushes in through a social event!
LEO: Make practical and creative use of the messages
that you have recently received. You have everything you need, so make the magic happen! Do not be afraid to ask for what you want, especially when it comes to your livelihood. There is great satisfaction to be had with your creations. Your talents are being sought!
VIRGO: Concentrate on where you really want to put
your energy next. Some extra income may be available to you. Putting some money toward a new experience or a new investment looks positive. It looks to mature beautifully! Take a moment mid-month to reflect on what is disappointing you; then let it go by, forgiving.
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4/5 - New moon in Aries 4/10 – Jupiter moves retrograde 4/11 – Another full moon in Libra 4/20 – Sun moves into Taurus 4/24 – Pluto moves retrograde 4/29 – Saturn moves retrograde
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARIES AND TAURUS!
LIBRA: Your energy balances out, and so do your activities this month. Accept whatever love and affection comes. Relationship and financial opportunities are wanting to make appearances. Be strong and bold enough in saying yes or no. Someone is coming in to ignite your passions and to ensure your plans are successful!
SCORPIO: Some secret wisdom is being imparted to you
which gives you an edge this month! Keep some of this to yourself, and be cautious with whom you share. Understand that sometimes knowledge is a burden. Your problem-solving abilities are enhanced now. Whatever mistake arises can be healed with your intention.
SAGITTARIUS: A recent trip or experience is proving
to be character-building. You may find yourself taking on more of a leadership role in April. If it becomes too overwhelming, separate yourself from the situation. You’ll find peace in giving yourself some distance. A settlement or offer is coming that helps your wellbeing!
CAPRICORN: Beware of any surrounding deception
and hidden agendas. It is a good time for you to clear out toxic relationships, patterns, and old wounds. Beginning a job or project from scrap looks most beneficial. A big transformation is happening within you that requires you to embrace rather than fight it.
AQUARIUS: You are being put on a pedestal! Others may
try to challenge your claim and worth, but your purpose is to shine your truth. A powerful conviction has stirred you, and you are encouraged to see it through. Your determination will gain you the respect of many this month. A victory is at hand; seize it!
PISCES: It’s OK to refuse a financial pursuit that feels
off. In the event that your anxiety tries to take over, look to your dreams and the fearful images that emerge. You will gain solutions this way that will transform your fears into your allies. A powerful statement can change the direction of your reputation in the blink of an eye!
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