PAPYRUS with Pride

By Ryan McKendrick, London volunteer

Every great change in history has come from someone standing up in the face of adversity and demanding their human rights. From the Suffragettes to the Civil Rights movement, the power has been within the people, to fight for the change that is needed.

LGBTIQ+ rights are no different. In 1969, patrons of New York City’s Stonewall Inn fought back against systematic oppression when resisting a violent raid of the underground LGBTIQ+ nightclub. Protestors, such as Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera, risked their lives to protect their community; an act which influenced LGBTIQ+ rights movements across the globe. On the oneyear anniversary of the Stonewall Riots, on the 28 June 1970, LGBTIQ+ protestors in New York City took back to the streets to march for the rights of their community – an event now referred to as Pride.

51 years later and Pride is now celebrated across the globe with over 150 festivals worldwide, and our perceptions of Pride have transformed from protest to party. Our huge celebration of Pride in the UK is signified by rainbow flags, blasting pop songs, and glittering drag queens. But as a trans person living in the UK it can often be difficult to find something to celebrate. As funding for trans-healthcare is being cut left right and centre, the public, news outlets, and public figures feel qualified to debate whether we can play sports, pee in public toilets, access essential surgery, and even if we can simply exist. While for some the fight may be over, for many it has just begun.

As a PAPYRUS volunteer, it is easy for me to see the real impact the UK’s Trans Panic has on my community, 48% of trans people in Britain report having attempted suicide at some point, with 84% having considered it.

PAPYRUS offers support for young people who experience these thoughts, and Pride is a time where we can consider where that support is needed most. As a mental health advocate and PAPYRUS volunteer I will fight for my community’s right to receive adequate mental health support, through a time where it can often feel the whole world is against us. For me Pride may be a party, but it will always be a protest.

PAPYRUS WITH PRIDE

What does Pride mean to you?

By Camille de Guerry de Beauregard, London volunteer

By Guy Beckett, London volunteer

On 1 June, I went out to my farmer’s market – it takes barely two minutes on foot, there and back. I didn’t see many people along the way, 15 or 20 at most and yet, I was nervous. The reason? A little Pride flag pinned to my t-shirt.

It was exhilarating, that such a small token could be out there, seen and acknowledged. It felt like saying, “hey, I’m queer!” to anyone who noticed it.

When I came out as bi to my dad, he said “you don’t know that.” When I told my mum, she said “I’d rather you weren’t.” I think I was half expecting someone to approach me, point to the pin and say “no, you’re not.”

I think that’s why Pride Month is important to me. Seeing rainbow flags all over my Instagram, this wave of love and understanding flooding my social media, saying to the world, “yep, we’re still here.” It gave me the courage to go outside and show my pride. If anyone in the market happened to be in this community, I hope seeing my flag made them smile behind their mask. I hope they heard the message; Pride month is for you.

My sexuality has always been at the centre of my own mental health issues. I have always struggled being confident with my true self and I am in constant fear of objection and rejection. To me, Pride is about overcoming this fear, and not just accepting who I am, but being proud of who I am and what makes me different.

Mental health issues disproportionately affect members of the LGBTQ+ community and 44% of LGBTQ+ people have experienced thoughts of suicide. The overwhelming support and acceptance our community receive during Pride month has such a positive impact and makes me feel more at ease with who I am and gives me the confidence to be myself.

I joined PAPYRUS to help me be more confident and comfortable with who I am through sharing my story and being more open about my mental health. I hope this will help others with being able to share their own stories and overcome their own mental health issues.

By ML Barber, London volunteer

Before the rainbow was used as a symbol for LGBTQ+ community, a pink triangle was used, as seen on the album Age of Consent by Bronski Beat (released in 1984). This symbol was the one used for gay men by the German Nazi regime in the concentration camps during the war. A pink triangle pointing downwards was sewn onto the shirts of gay men in the concentration camps. In the 1970s, the symbol was reclaimed to identify liberation by the first gay rights organisation in Germany, HUW.

Harvey Milk was the first openly-gay politician elected to public office in California, he was elected to the board of supervisors, the legislative body. He commissioned Gilbert Baker to create the first rainbow flag for the 1978 San Francisco Pride. In the original flag, the colours were as follows: hot pink for sexuality; red for life; orange for healing; yellow for sunlight; green for nature; blue for art; indigo for harmony or serenity; and violet for the human spirit.

The flag has undergone transitions. Hot pink was dropped because it could not be mass produced at the time. Indigo was dropped for a protest parade when Harvey Milk was assassinated. More recently, in 2017, Philadelphia added black and brown to further promote inclusiveness and to support ethnic members of the LGBTQ+ community.

The flag is intended to represent inclusiveness and should never be used as a symbol of queer versus straight. In most cases, it is represented by the six colours, red, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple .

I think the Pride flag it is a brilliant symbol and hope that one day, everyone that wants to can wear it can do so freely and be proud to do so.

To be queer is to be powerful

By Alice Kidd, London volunteer

Pride month is characterised as a time of joy and excitement, an opportunity to celebrate the collective histories and identities of queer people. For queer folks themselves however, Pride month can also evoke feelings of anger, resentment and isolation as the battle against systemic oppression and discrimination continues long after June is over.

These battles, including homophobia, transphobia, social isolation and rejection, can take a massive toll on the mental health of an LGBTQIA+ individual. A recent study by the charity Stonewall found that in 2020 alone, one in eight LGBTQIA+ people aged 18-24 had attempted to end their life, and almost half of trans people had suffered suicidal thoughts. Identifying as LGBTQIA+ however, is also a greatly liberating existence which can have an immensely positive effect on an individual’s life and mental wellbeing.

Speaking to Smash the Stigma about their lived experience as a non-binary queer person is Lowie. Lowie Trevena is a non-binary, 23-year-old journalist and writer living in Bristol. They have blossomed in various editorial roles writing passionately about the LGBTQIA+ community, government policy and media, and in 2020, were named one of Bristol’s 36 most influential LGBT+ people in Bristol by BristolLive. They are also a passionate advocate for taking care of our mental health, and generally an all-round lovely person.

Pride month is an opportunity to not only celebrate the diversity of the queer community, but to acknowledge the people that fought for the rights LGBTQ+ people have in 2021. It’s also a protest from queer people, recognising the ongoing activism that needs to happen for true equality, both in the UK and throughout the world.

If you’re comfortable, would you mind sharing a little about your personal identity journey and perhaps any way in which your mental health has suffered as a result of coming out, or of the behaviour of others?

The journey of gender and sexuality is strange. It’s an ongoing process. I came out as pansexual aged 16 and as non-binary aged 18, and I now call myself queer. At 23, I’m still ‘coming out’ all the time and dealing with the long-lasting impacts, emotionally and mentally, of this and of having to start and continue a gender and sexuality journey.

Emotionally, it’s exhausting to regularly ‘out’ yourself to new people, have people continually use the wrong pronouns and to fight to be taken seriously as someone who isn’t a man or a woman, but a gender diverse person. Mentally, it’s a challenge! There’s a lot of trauma that comes from the queerphobia that UK society continues to perpetuate, from using “so gay” as an insult in secondary school, to the rampant transphobia that the media continues to spew out.

Coming out can be traumatic; negative reactions from people you’re close to have a really long-lasting impact. There’s also a darker side to it when it comes to mental health. I can only speak for myself, but I truly tried to destroy myself in the early days of realising I was different and discovering it was because I was queer. We’re still taught, as LGBTQ+ people, that we are lesser, wrong, need fixing, and worse.

It’s so powerful to be unapologetically yourself, even in a world that is still learning to love you, and a society that

is unsure of queerness. ”

Thank you for sharing that, Lowie. How does embracing your identity positively impact your mental wellbeing?

Despite all the challenges that come along with queerness, being LGBTQ+ is truly something I am so thankful for. It’s opened doors to communities, friendships and activism. It’s a ready-made group of people who are (on the whole) lovely.

It was definitely challenging as a teenager, but as a young adult I find power and positivity in my identity. It’s so powerful to be unapologetically yourself, even in a world that is still learning to love you, and a society that is unsure of queerness. To be queer is to be powerful, and that impacts my mental health so positively.

Do you have any examples of communities, groups or resources you have discovered to help you take care of your mental health?

They can be somewhat few and far between (especially in rural areas) but LGBTQ+ youth groups such as Freedom in Bristol are amazing places to find other people like yourself.

Online communities are also really important – I used Tumblr and YouTube a lot when I started on my journey aged 14 or 15 (I am very old lol). Look for things that represent yourself too: books, content creators, films, music, the list goes on. There are loads of great resources online too. Genderkit.org is great for trans folks, as are charities such as Stonewall and Just Like Us. If there are LGBTQ+ groups or GSA groups at school, college or work, reach out to them. But honestly, the internet is your oyster. Go find yourself.

The young person knows themselves best! If someone comes to you for support, take it as a compliment; it means they trust you. And remember, first reactions stick: even if you don’t understand everything they’re saying, trust them to know themselves. The likelihood is that this young person has been thinking about their gender and/or sexuality for a very long time, and it will have taken a lot of courage to tell someone.

Other important things to remember: Do not expect the young person to educate you – do the research yourself. Also, use the correct pronouns and names without hesitation. This may take some practice, and it’s okay to make mistakes, but don’t made a big deal out of it. It’s not about you!

Ensure you don’t ‘out’ the young person – LGBTQ+ people often come out in stages. For example, their friends may know, but they might not have told their parents yet. The best way to avoid accidentally outing someone is to ask them directly who they’re out to, and how you can best support them.

Thank you, Lowie that’s great advice. I have one final question that everyone at PAPYRUS has to answer before they’re allowed to leave… What are you planning to do for self-care this week?

Wholesome! I’ve gotten really back into reading, so spending my evenings doing that instead of doom-scrolling.

Find out more about Lowie by visiting: lowietrevena.carrd.co

Links to resources mentioned in this article: 1. Stonewall Charity (stats in opening paragraph): https://www.stonewall.org.uk/lgbt-britainhealth 2. BristolLive “The Pink List 2020: The 36 most influential LGBT+ people in Bristol right now”: https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/pinc-list-2020-35-most-4508391 3. Genderkit.org: https://genderkit.org.uk/ 4. Stonewall Charity: https://www.stonewall.org.uk/ 5. Just Like Us: https://www.justlikeus.org/

HOPELINEUK is a free, confidential, non-judgmental helpline, if you’re experiencing thoughts of suicide. Call 0800 068 4141 – our trained suicide prevention advisers are here to help from 9am to midnight, every day of the year.

By Thomas Waters, London volunteer

We pass in failing light and ask ourselves – will we ever see the free light of day. We have learned to “take it on the chin!” heard that “It’s a sin!” Or the arguments disregarding, them and they.

But true kindness walks in clothes of gossamer rainbows And silence isn’t always peace, the dawn is coming soon, she’s always darkest before it. So, this is a new promise to you – validity in the shape of Love, for PRIDE no longer comes before a fall.

Stand tall! in the marching to that new dawn – voices in unison – with hearts and hands entwined. Fear makes monsters of men and we are far from home and less than perfect But seek as if to listen to the voices that shout out with purpose. Lift each note from the ones that went before us Whose voices, no longer speak yet are victorious

If those who seek to create hate from love –Remember then that they don’t speak for us The sun is finally coming through on a hot June afternoon And if they tell us not to speak, we shall not divided be – come rest with me under the branches of a rootless tree and we’ll march through towns and cities We’ve grown from RIOTS But still, we need PRIDE Now or on any other day – and if you think we are not here to stay We might just throw that brick anyway.

Thomas Waters is an artist, taxidermist and writer living and working in London and a volunteer for PAPYRUS. He writes poetry and prose based on grief, journeying to sobriety and love using occult and folkloric themes. His latest anthology ‘A Year Falls Out My Gaping Mouth’ along with other titles are available from Lulu press.