Blink issue 19 may31 2014

HOLY COW On the trail of the forbidden meat through the homes, bylanes and restaurants of Kolkata p3

saturday, may 31, 2014

AFP/JEWEL SAMAD

Shuddh, desi Sinha

Unapologetic about her choices, Sonakshi Sinha is happy to be the singing, dancing heroine who refuses to kiss on screen but sets the box office ringing p10

NETA ON WHEELS Farewell to the Ambassador, a car that tells of our greasy past and licence raj p4

YOU ARE THE PROTEST How to write a protest poem in this season of light, this season of darkness p17

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Things fall apart

THE COMPASS CHRONICLES

Fish falling from clouds

Expelled from a university in UP, the future of a few Kashmiri students hangs in the balance

rohit gupta

Omens and legends aside, could it have been a surreptitious scientific experiment?

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Bengal, edited by James Prinsep, we find the phenomenon, on a considerable scale, which following account. “The phenomenon of fish happened at the Nokulhatty factory, zillah falling from the sky in the rainy season,” Dacca Jelalpur, in 1830. Mr Cameron, who comwrites Prinsep, “however incredmunicated the fact, took the preible it may appear, has been atcaution of having a regular deposition of the evidence of tested by such circumstantial several natives who had witevidence, that no reasonable doubt can be entertained of the nessed the fall, made in Bengafact. I was as incredulous as my lee, and attested before the The shower of fish neighbours, until I once found a magistrate: the statement is well took place on worthy of preservation in a jourfish, which had apparently been February 19, 1830 nal of science; I therefore make alive when it fell, in the brass no apology for introducing a funnel of my pluviometer at Betranslation at length. The shownares, which stood on an insulated stone pillar, raised five feet er of fish took place on 19 February, 1830, in the neighbourhood above the ground in my garden.”

The pluviometer is a small rain-gauge, of the Surbundy factory, Feridpoor.”

All the nine eyewitnesses listed agree on the which Prinsep would have owned, being a meteorologist of some repute, aside from many date and time (Friday at noon) and on the other scientific pursuits. This note describes types of fishes that fell. One of these was Shekh several other witnesses of fish falling from the Katbuddin, who as he was “coming from the sky, “I have now before me a note of a similar fields, saw a number of fish spread on the bank of a nala. I picked up six of them, viz two very morning, Hasan (name dents at a private university in Noida were al- boduli, twocountry, mirgal,some and of two nouchi, besides across the whom continue to changed) leaves his five-room house legedly forced to shout anti-Pak slogans and these, there were as many fish of numerface problems theother scholarship funds at Badgaon in Srinagar and sets out subsequently beaten up. ous kinds, andentirely they were witnessed by many haven’t been disbursed.

Faced with to find odd jobs. For ₹3,000 a month, wholetters were there.

Somecolleges, of thesemany fish Last week, the 67 Kashmiri students return- persons termination from their he works as a mason, labourer or carpenter. ed to the SVSU campus. According to the vice- were fresh, others without have had no but choice but torotten returnand to the Valley.

Hasan is 27 years old and, for all purposes, the chancellor, Professor Manzoor Ahmed, “major heads. more.”

“See,I know I don’tnoknow what happened exactly head of a family of four brothers, two sisters, a portions of the internal inquiry by the univer- (on Some witnesses were clearly afraid tothem conMarch 2). But I suspect at least two of working mother and an invalid father. He also sity are over.” A separate inquiry is being con- sume these supernatural fish. Sreesays Dipchun(Kashmiris) were miscreants,” Baaji, holds a degree in sociology and a Masters in ducted by the Meerut police, findings of dru Bundopadhya, agedwas 45 years, narrates, “...I whose Srinagar office allegedly attacked education, obtained through distance learn- which are not out yet. Meanwhile, the univer- picked up some of these fish — but elections one named by students.

Baaji, who contested as ing at the Indira Gandhi National Open Uni- sity has cancelled the expulsion of 57 Kashmiri Banchha Ram Chung forbadealso me, blames saying, ‘Do an independent in Srinagar, the versity (IGNOU). “I could be a teacher but there students, allowing them to renot touch these fish;and youparties do notfor know what media politicisare no jobs here. So I do mazdoori,” he says. fish they are, ing and how fallen here.’ sume their studies. The remainthe they issue.have “The students Despite the boom in higher education insti- ing 10 have been asked to leave.

Listening to him, I threw away allin the fish, days and would’ve returned three tutions in Jammu & Kashmir, the sector has They will be given migration went away.” Three years later, themedia... zamindars of if it wasn’t for the For all seen a considerable gap between policies and certificates on request and no a village nearthe Allahabad spoke ofI awent storm acother incidents, to the implementation. According to a HRD ministry mention of the incident will be companied a rain of fish, when and that solved theplaced issues The university is not byuniversity report, the State has one of the lowest concen- made; 16-year-old Ahmed is one in a pan turned blood. onto the spot.” an island. Violence trations of colleges — 14 per lakh people com- of them. “But we haven’t asked andsurvey assuming Citing aaside, recent that happensOmens and legends Meerut melee A scuffle broke out on the Subharti Unipared to the all-India average of 23. With four for a migration certificate. We such a thing did occur it wouldKashmiri have to be a shows the—average has versity campus in Meerut when Shahid Afridi hit two of his siblings pursuing correspondence want him to continue to study rather strongbecome wind ormore waveirritable to carryand away enarguback-to-back sixes in the final over of the India-Pak Asia courses, Hasan considers his 16-year-old broth- there,” says Hasan. tire shoals of mentative fish into theinsky. a large theOrlast twoflock decCup semi-final reuters/andrew biraj; (top right) protests er Ahmed (name changed) lucky. As part of the of birds who ades, dropped their says, cargo mid-flight, Baaji “Kashmiri were held in Srinagar in support of the Kashmiri students Prime Minister’s Special Scholarship Scheme, The jury is out upon the hapless natives.

Instead if they were students need to be understood. who were expelled on that count nissar ahmad Ahmed was chosen for an AICTE-approved in- Three months after the incident and two near- thrown earth, ittowards would have required a There’s from a sentiment Pakistan.

They stitute outside Kashmir. In 2013, he enrolled at complete inquiries later, the original question powerful trebuchet — the Romanwho’ve slingare emotional.

These arehuge children the Swami Vivekanand Subharti University remains: What happened that night? Accord- shot used to hurl rocksof at strife the enemy. grown upin inwar an atmosphere and hu(SVSU) in Meerut, Uttar Pradesh, for a BA LLB ing to the video evidence on YouTube of a few man Therights otherviolations, possibilitythey is some prankneedmerry counselling.” course. Yet, for three months now, Ahmed and Kashmiri students who spoke out, others had ster sailing highyear above in a hot air balloon, Junaid, a first B Pharma student admits his family have been living under a shadow of taken offence at the pro-Pak cheering and throwing fish“Inatcase the itvillagers confound to nothing. (causingtodamage to controversy and uncertainty.

However, the first flight of aI thrashed them. “If the seniors hadn’t inter- them. property) happened, I’mrecorded not saying it did, On March 3, SVSU hit the headlines for ‘ex- vened, we’d have been beaten to death,” said European inthere…

India was March 16, 1836 by a wasn’t even buton even if it did, a penalty pelling’ 67 Kashmiri students following a scuf- one of them. They also alleged that a similar certain D Robertson from Muchikhola, a subshould’ve been enough.”

Some say they’ve fle that broke out on its campus the previous incident had occurred in February — “Jaan leva urb oftold Calcutta — only a few years after the said been to avoid speaking to the media. night over the India-Pakistan Asia Cup semi-fi- hamla tha” (a near fatal attack) — adding that precipitation of fishes. yet, this says theory “The university is notAnd an island,” thehas VC nal. During the match, which was playing at a the injured student had to get stitches. some whenmerit. asked to give his version of the incident.

TV room in one of the 13 hostels on campus, allthe know the Montgolfier While the VC denies any knowledge of it, Ra- “ItWe is in city.that Violence happens.” Sobrothers will the passions were running high and students bia Altaf, who runs an NGO, All India Centre for had made the firstthe manned flight infind France as university help 10 students placewere cheering fervently for both sides. Things Urban and Rural Development (AICURD) in early as 1783, after ballooning had ment elsewhere?

“We which have nothing to do with came to a head when the Kashmiri students Srinagar, says there have been at least five oth- quickly the we subject of a has scientific that,” hebecome says. When ask if SVSU taken rooting for Pakistan were accused of being er incidents in the last two years at SVSU. “One arms between taking Englandaction and France.

Their or is race considering against the ‘anti-national’. The next day, they were booked or two of them were serious in nature but I scientists werestudents convinced, writes Amitabha non-Kashmiri present at the time, he under section 124A (sedition; withdrawn lat- won’t reveal anything about them,” says Rabia Ghosh, “of the research value of balloons in says, “They weren’t involved.

There was no er), 153A (promoting enmity between groups) Baaji, as she is fondly called. Since 2012, her or- many disciplines likewhy meteorological, astronconfrontation.

Then will we take action?” and 427 (mischief) of IPC. They were slapped ganisation has been instrumental in sending omical and topographical observations, deter“My brother didn’t do anything, he doesn’t with a fine of ₹5,000 and asked to leave the hundreds of economically backward Kashmi- mination of cricket,” the limitssays of respirability, speed even watch Hasan. Admissions campus for three days. Three days turned into ri students through the Prime Minister’s of and the velocity of are falling in forsound, the scholarship scheme overbodies

by Januthree months, thanks to a heated election Scholarship Scheme, including the 67 stu- the ary.rarefied “If they atmosphere.” let him go now, Ahmed will lose campaign in a communally sensitive State. dents at SVSU. Each year, under the ₹1,200- not one, but two years. Where will he go?”

In May, a hostel in Greater Noida reported a crore scheme that got off to a shaky start in rohit gupta explores the history of science as Ready for launch The first manned hot air balloon, designed by theincident, Montgolfier took off from Paris, on November 21, 1783 wikicommons t@fadesingh priyanka kotamraju similar inbrothers, which three Kashmiri stu2011, about 5,000 Kashmiri students are sent Compasswallah here is an urban legend about Bombay’s most well-known seafood delicacy, the Bombay duck — actually a type of lizardfish, scientifically termed the harpodon nehereus. Murali Ranganathan’s recent translation of an 1863 biography of the city by Marathi writer Govind Narayan relates the myth thus, “When Lord Rama was building a bridge across the sea to get to Lanka, all the fish except the bombil helped him. This enraged Lord Rama who twisted it in his hands and tossed it away. It fell in the Mumbai Bay. From that time on, its bones have been crushed and it has become soft. Devoid of a backbone, it is as soft as cotton when fresh.” Narayan attributes the story to local sheikh chillis (tellers of tall tales). One wonders exactly when the fish thrown by Rama’s own hand finally landed in the waters of the bay, and as it fell did someone notice the boneless projectile descend from the sky?

In an early journal of The Asiatic Society of

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What’s at steak?

Kolkata has never had a beef with the Filet Mignon. But is that likely to change now?

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Holier than cow At a protest in the Capital demanding a ban on the slaughter of cows afp/raveendran

grew up in a strictly vegetarian household and until the age of 17, I had only allowed myself the transgression of eggs in my birthday cake. I vividly remember my first chicken sandwich. My toes had curled with pleasure, and I was desperate to take this seductively guilty relationship to the next level. Sitting in a posh restaurant a month later, I felt it was finally time for a juicy steak. Placing my order, I stuttered, “Um, a fi-ley min-yon for me, thanks.” But then the steward bowled me a googly. “Sir, would that be rare, medium, well done?” Convinced that he was asking me to pay a prior compliment to the chef, I said, “Well done, of course.” I saw him screw up his nose. I didn’t know my beef then. With time, though, that has changed. The Filet Mignon has made sure of it.

Like all forbidden fruits, it must be said, it can sometimes be hard for a beef-eater in Kolkata to find his or her fill. Banned in a majority of homes, it is also missing from the tables of most restaurants in the city. Even an eatery like Shiraz, famed for its biryani and kebabs, adheres to a strict no-pork-no-beef policy.

When asked if the omission of beef helps make the restaurant’s menu secular, co-owner Atiqur Rahman says, “You could call it secular,

shutterstock

but I would refer to the decision as business- seems, is serious about the promise it made in minded. Roughly 80 per cent of our clientele its manifesto. It plans to do everything in its is non-Muslim, so why take a chance?” power to protect the cow and its progeny.

While a restaurant or two have bravely tak- Since the International Society for Krishna en that chance, none seem to have taken the Consciousness (ISKCON) already has experisame kind of risk as Rubi’s Grill. Made to re- ence in the matter of bovine protection, I semble a classic American diner, the three- choose to seek an appointment with Radharayear-old establishment offers variations of the man Das, general manager of the spiritual sobeef steak, shepherd’s pies and an assortment ciety’s Kolkata chapter. of beef burgers. Proprietor Manish Das says Dressed in his all-white attire, the monk that it took him all of two years first hands me three pocketto realise that there would be a books — Cows are Cool: Love ’Em, demand for beef if he added it Capital Communism & Cowism to his menu. “I felt there was a and Let’s be Friends: A Curious, mindset which defined us as a Calm Cow. While the books teach people who didn’t eat beef. ToI’m sure you’ve heard you cow-whispering techniques day, I can say that the amount of and popularise forums such as of mad cow disease. beef we use in a week equals the MooTube, they also speak of the That, you can say, is amount of fish we need in a cow’s importance in a low-enerdivine retribution month.” Despite his trade, howgy future. Das explains ISKCON’s ever, 29-year-old Das admits he philosophy. “A cow eats grass, isn’t allowed to take beef home. which is largely insignificant and costs nothing. She then gives us he Jhingan household is a milk, which is considered to be peculiar exception. Even though beef was amrit (nectar).” Insisting that there is a shortalways cooked in their kitchen, 33-year-old age of milk in India, Das argues, “Unless we Bhavna’s father had forbidden her from eat- can give all our children milk, there should be ing it until she was 18. It was a choice, he felt, no reason for a slaughterhouse to exist.” Listshe should make as an adult. In the end, the ing the benefits of cow urine and cow manure, sight of roast beef and beef vindaloo proved to Das then barrels on about how nature has its be enough of a catalyst. “I obviously suc- own way of punishing cow slaughter. “I am cumbed.” For many friends who aren’t al- sure you have heard of mad cow disease. That, lowed beef at home, her mother’s steaks and you can say, is divine retribution.” curries have been frequent requests. Only too Feeling inexplicably chastised, I make my happy to comply, Bella Jhingan does have but way to a butcher’s shop in the city’s Beck Baone complaint: “The quality of our beef has gan area. Pyaru Qureshi has spent his entire gone down because a lot of it is being export- life selling beef. “There is one thing you must ed. I often need to inform my vendor a few understand,” he says while trying to console days in advance.” me. “There is a reason why the beef trade will Surprisingly, it is the Bharatiya Janata Party not go anywhere. People of all religions sell it (BJP) that might have an answer to Mrs Jhin- and people of all religions eat it. They might gan’s woes. Appalled by the fact that by selling not confess to it, but I sell more than two cows beef to countries such as Malaysia, Thailand, or bulls every day. I am telling you, it’s true.”

Vietnam and Egypt, India was fast earning the My spirits slightly lifted, I ask him which aniposition of the world’s largest beef exporter, mal ranks as his favourite. “The cow, undoubtBJP leader Satpal Malik had declared a few edly. Gold will be gold. Always.” days before May 16, “If elected, we will crack down on beef exports.” The saffron party, it shreevatsa nevatia is a Kolkata-based writer

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A BUTTERFLY BREEZE FROM MP

joanna van gruisen

The number game Before you rejoice, note the skewed equation of political will and greenhouse gases in India BJP – 282+ : CO2 – 400+

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s April slips into May, the daytime temperatures in our part of Madhya Pradesh are not very conducive to tourism, so we shut shop and wait for the cooler months. It is however, a glorious arboreal month: the number of trees that are in flower and in the flush of wonderful fresh greens or stunning crimsons of new leaf must be the highest at this time. We delighted in this eye feast as we drove to Delhi early in May. It was marriage season too so we passed an inordinate number of bullock carts, tractortrailers, small trucks and roof-laden buses piled high with dowries (mattresses, furniture, refrigerators, steel cupboards, etc) travelling to homes of the newly marrieds. But even more than this, we shared the road with innumerable trucks weighed down with the recently harvested wheat crop. Many new godowns have sprung up (some still being constructed), and in front of them all were long lines of trucks and trailers waiting to offload their produce. MP is expecting another bumper harvest in spite of unseasonable rain in some areas. It certainly looked that way.

Last year’s procurement of wheat in MP has increased more than tenfold over the last decade. Procurement this year is already up another 25 per cent and it is thought that MP is

Papa di gaddi A neta or babu in a car other than the Ambassador was sure to suffer from an identity crisis afp/douglas e curran

Great expectations Could the celebrations of high agricultural yield in India, and the preparations for such sustained growth over the next few years, be overhasty? reuters

set to surpass even Punjab in wheat produc- our earth’s atmosphere remained over 400 tion: 19 million tonnes is the amount predict- parts per million (ppm) for a full month. CO2, ed — hence the urgency of building more as I hope everyone now knows, is the chief grain storage facilities. However, celebrations greenhouse gas that results from human acof such agricultural success and preparations tivities and is responsible for global warming for a continuing high may be short-lived. and climate change. We first hit this level on Apart from the unsustainable excess of pesti- May 9, 2013 but April 2014 was the first month cides, there is concern as to whether MP — or in human history that it remained above this indeed India as a whole — will be able to up- consistently. To give this some perspective: hold such production over the coming years pre-industrial levels of CO2 were around or decades. The agricultural sector is the most 280ppm. It is of course just a number but clisensitive to climate change and matologists agree that 400 is a wheat is one of the vulnerable ‘historic threshold’ and we have crops. Although admittedly ‘entered a new danger zone’. there is little certainty to the preWhy should this be headline dictions as a number of issues news? Because it will change the It is of course just make for a complex scenario, world as we know it. The upper a number but many scientists are concerned safety limit was pegged at climatologists agree that climate change and our 350ppm. The last time the warming planet will have the ef- that 400ppm of CO2 is earth’s CO2 was below this was ‘historic fect of lowering theinproduction production started the late ’50s, noaone had threshold’ in the year 1987.that In spite of all the inequities were so pervasive for many beand we haveing ‘entered of several that foodthis items, including imagined mascot of Indian industry earth summits andprivilege. internationplump was almost a guilty The a new danger zone’ wheat.

Whereinto detailed research cul-de-sac. would drive an evolutionary al protocols, most ample Ambassador seemed to havecountries the wellon hasitbeen done,new lower For wheat decades, had little to offer. The car fed looks of continue rely on andCorpulent burn fosa corrupttopolitician. yields are the general our sense and white, it was that was supposed to revolutionise sil the fuels and the double increase in mechanical of the conclusion. of time and space turned out to be an example roly-poly, khadi-clad greenhouse gases continues to neta in his conspiratorial of Midst statusthe quo.election-dominated No wonder then that it became black glasses.accelerate. onedeliberate, of the world’s It was slowAsand like news the last few weeks was a busuch aoffavourite of our calcified best known climatologists, the neta who could not Dr be disturbing announcement that did not seem James Hansen, reaucracy and corrupt politicians. says: or “If the humanity wishes to rushed babu with his red to The get Ambassador the attentionsoiteloquently deserves. Admittedly it preserve a planet exto thattake on which civtapesimilar who would his own does nothow make for sexy headlines but it is an ilisation developed pressed people perceived govto Its which life on earth sweet and time. dignified poise event that affects us all and should give every- is adapted, paleoclimate ernment and how government evidence ongoon the potholed roadsand signified The Ambassador was one pause itself, for thought. needs to be factored ing climate change perceived that it Itbecame the suggest will aloof need someone whothat wasCO2 regally the mechanical into government vision, agricultural to be reducedfrom only our unauthorised symbol of our the Infrom ground (current reality. levels) to most Itsatgrave, double of the rolypolicies, our development dian state.

The Ambassadorstrategies, without our en- 350 ppm.” When you read of melting glaciers bulging exteriors announced poly, khadi-clad neta ergy actually into a netaproduction, or a babu inside lost halfjust its about ev- and disappearing arctic iceofshelves, when the authority its esteemed erything.

Once euphoria of victory wheat harvests brand value, whilethe a neta or a babu are no longer butglassdefipassenger.

Withbumper its tinted dissipates a little, let sure us hope that the recent cient, remember in any other car was to plunge these figures and know why. es, curtained windows and spotvictors and newcrisis. rulers of our country will We have already into an identity too many less delayed white colour, it decades: had the open eyes andappealed minds to to thethe meaning of the longer we Thetheir Ambassador postponeofaction mitigate mystique sarkaritopower: It this milestone the Indian world just hit. when be- this, pre-liberalisation aesthetic more expensive ecologwas the a moving parlour economically, where the high and 2014and ushered a new erathat forundesirIndia — ically ingMay plump heavyin was not all and sociologically it will be. Will the new mighty played their secret games. the change isnation likely todependent generate huge ableelectoral in a starving on push thisgod in?isMy fears Justfor as development the vehicle offactor a Hindu part of transformations. we also entered a new foreign aid. Thin,But emaciated looks and the are that it will not. its overall connotation, the Ambassador too era in April. This was the timetropes — for atofleast weight-loss tamasha are first cultural the was part of the iconography of the corrupt nevan gruisen issmug a wildlife photographer, 800,000, maybe even 15 million years post-liberalisation generation which has (the big- joanna ta. The self-enclosed, abundance of the andnew hotelier based near thehis Panna Tiger world was aand bitmore of a different placethem. then!)

— conservationist ger salaries ways to spend The vehicle of this god signified occupathat the amount of carbon dioxide (CO2) in Reserve in Madhya Pradesh

The mount of the mai-baap sarkar

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The Ambassador was a perfect symbol of bureaucracy in the pre-liberalised Indian State, where neither speed nor acceleration were desired virtues

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he Ambassador is no more. The car that carried the powerful has drifted quietly down the road. It has been on ventilator for long with recurrent talk of its possible revival. The nation’s ‘official’ car actually died the day a Marutidriving Manmohan Singh became our finance minister and brought to our plodding economy the agility of a hatchback. Decades later, when Hindustan Motors finally decided to consign the Nehruvian relic to the vault of history, the nation witnessed another rite of passage: The swearing-in of the Modi sarkar.

Narendra Modi promises to drive our economy with the brute force of an SUV. Clearly, New India was no country for the old car.

Yet, so central is the Ambassador to our tryst with technology, our bureaucratic inertia, our VIP culture, our licence-permit raj and our venal politics that its history can well be the ghost history of our nation.

The Ambassador wasn’t just another colonial derivative, even though its design was borrowed from the British car Morris Oxford III. It was far sturdier and thus ideal for Indian roads. It was the symbol of India’s industrial and technological self-sufficiency. When its

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tion of the nation’s resources. Its white opacity and forbidding tinted windows suggested that he had retained something of the unreachable superiority of a royal. The Ambassador was the mount of the mai-baap sarkar.

With a revolving red beacon atop, the Ambassador was a bully on the road. It symbolised the State’s will to dominate the space where it daily engages with its people in most visible and dramatic ways, defying traffic signals and cutting through crowds like a knife. It became the overbearing State’s gesture to its people: Get aside. The VIP bully subverted the primary democratic site where the State enforces the law and creates consensus out of chaos.

In the pre-liberalised Indian State, where neither speed was a virtue nor acceleration a

desirable administrative manoeuvre, the Ambassador was a perfect symbol of bureaucracy.

The car was for the slow, deliberative babu for whom being sleek, fast and efficient was rather a mark of desperate inadequacy.

Though it was supposed to be an instrument of mobility, a propeller for the nation’s governing class, the Ambassador was really at the heart of the timeless stasis of pre-liberalised India. It is the new economy that has truly put India on wheels.

After the advent of the Maruti, it continued to be the vehicle of choice for the babu and the neta but it was increasingly becoming a misfit in a culture of speed ushered in by Manmohan Singh, first as a finance minister and later as the prime minister. The light and nimble Ma-

ruti signalled a power shift from the government to the new middle class and the burgeoning private enterprise. Now when Narendra Modi promises a small government and quick, unbridled expansion of the economy, the lumbering Ambassador could hardly have the right of way.

The narrative strands of the India story are coming together in startling ways. The last living relic from the Nehruvian age met its end just days before the 50th death anniversary of India’s first prime minister. And around the same time, a new order came to power in Delhi. The death of the Ambassador truly marks the passing of an era. dharminder kumar is a freelance journalist in Delhi

What kind of car is this?

It can give you the thrills of a Ferrari and it can empty its innards in a royal courtyard

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Board and lodging The Ambassador could fit in a family and a family’s family sushanta patronobish

t was a car that with equal ease, could bucket across a ploughed field with a dozen swarthy farmhands (and animals) on board and not turn a hair, and spill the entire contents of her sump in the forecourt of Rashtrapati Bhavan while dropping off a Head of State. Every single one was custom built with its own collection of genetic quirks and eccentricities. We had a string of them: the earliest I remember was a dark blue original, back in the early ’60s, MSW 438, (if I remember rightly), that was by far mechanically most sound. She took us up and down from Madras to Ooty (as they were then) and never even had a flat, let alone breathlessness while tackling the hairpin bends. Her successors were a different breed.

The new, exciting Mark II! that replaced her had a new! exciting! electric fuel pump, which apart from tick-tick-ticking all the time like a bomb about to explode pumped fuel nowhere — and made us abort another motoring holiday — because even the big fancy TVS garage in Madurai (where we were stranded) could not get their heads around the problem. Another old faithful would break her axle so regularly, every three months, that we could predict the

week when this was due — and plan trips ac- vided. After a shopping spree and vague about cordingly. Fan belts went with monotonous the colour of the substitute, she unlocked the regularity and I remember with a shudder, a first Ambassador that appeared familiar and sizzling May afternoon on Delhi’s Ring Road, drove halfway across Bombay (as it was then when the fan belt shredded — and the brakes known) to her next stop. But then the stolen went at the same time. You felt as if you were car decided that enough was enough and restepping into a cowpat when you fused to start when she tried a pressed the brake pedal — and the second time. “What kind of car is car just surged on inexorably, as this?” she fumed before the drivahead, the steam rose and hissed er landed up and told her, “But from her noble prow. The mechanmemsahib that is not our car!”

You felt you were ic’s eyes were like grapefruit when I New Ambassadors presented stepping into a pulled into the garage and he saw a host of challenges to their drivcowpat on pressing the muck spilling like lava out of the ers. The gears would give you the brake pedal hubcaps and the plume of steam blisters — you needed to karate erupting from the bonnet. This chop rather than change them — same beauty had a trick gearbox — in 10 minutes flat. You had to of you could only change from second course, drop-kick the clutch. The to third if you knew the secret forsteering — like a ship’s wheel — mula, which was like knowing the combina- would give your shoulders and biceps a good tion numbers of a safe. No newcomer could workout. One car was delivered with a distinct grind away in that car in anything other than list to starboard, which the dealer could not second gear. see. (They or the manufacturers saw very little But my mother did something of that kind indeed.) But yes, that's enough dissing; there — she stole an Ambassador — not even realis- were plusses too. ing that she had. The regular car had gone for This hulk produced only around 50 bhp, repairs and a substitute Amby had been pro- but had enough torque and didn’t fuss if you set off in third gear. Road surfaces were irrelevant, she went over everything. And yes, I could back and park one with a speed and precision I can never manage with these new bulbous beauties.

As for speed? Well, tell me, which car in the world can give you all the thrills and chills of a hysterical Ferrari at terminal velocity, while doing just 80 kmph? The heat, the jarring, the noise, the rattling, the smell of burning oil, the sheer drama — it was all there — who needed a shrieking Ferrari costing crores? And seriously, few cars are so easy to climb into and climb out of than the Amby. After sales service and repairs were provided anywhere and anytime in the country by an army of phantom little boys in flapping shorts who miraculously emerged the moment you put up the bonnet.

And yes, the car had a soul: We were driving home from dinner one night, back in the late ’80s in our last Amby and discussing (softly) the acquisition of one of those newfangled Marutis. The grey lady coasted to a gentle halt, smoke emerging from under the dashboard.

Right outside the Supreme Court premises, she had attempted self-immolation.

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manjula padmanabhan

ELSEWHERE

Day in the city Travelling with convicts and strolling in Central Park with friends

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y seat companion on the bus from Binghamton to New York City whispers, “Half the other passengers are ex-cons!” There’s a big “correction facility” near Binghamton. She told me how to identify recently released prisoners. “They’re starin’ out the windows, they’re jumpin’ off the bus at every stop and they’ve got all their stuff in one big bag.” It’s true. The women sport inch-long nails and flashy clothes. The men are heavily tattooed. I’m dying to turn around and ask questions, but I don’t. Ex-cons, more than the rest of us, need their privacy.

In New York, I get off at Port Authority Bus Terminal in Manhattan and take the subway to Jackson Heights in the East. It’s a multi-ethnic neighbourhood where ladies wearing twinkling n a world of status messages and selfhits the bottle. Ajay himself is torn bedupattas walk alongside ladies in billowing black burkhas. I get ies, everything is open to scrutiny tween guilt, sadness and a desire to be to the apartment building where a dear friend from Mumbai is and censure. In fact, you are expected from a ‘normal’ family. It is the early ’70s visiting her daughter. After a leisurely lunch and tea, I leave at to be reproachful of all aspects of and the massive emigration of middlesix to ride on the Long Island Rail Road, with its double-decker modern-day living — government inefficlass Indians to America is just beginning. carriages and $7 tickets. Forty minutes later I get off at Mineola ciency, fashion faux pas, social bloopers, Other immigrants see the family as a to stay with friends who are long-time US residents, both docpronunciation errors. But even in this source of nationalistic pride. Children tors, both originally from Tamil Nadu. They are wonderful time of compulsive criticism, the eviwho misbehave are brought forth to witSweet 60 Senior citizens are drawn to the hosts. For dinner there’s three kinds of rice, plus sambar, two dence of dysfunction in families — and ness for themselves the unconditional large open spaces and special facilities on veggie curries and curried salmon, with alfalfa-sprout salad let’s concede the fact that all families are love offered by Indian parents. There is aloffer at dedicated housing projects and delicious sour-cream instead of dahi. Yum. for them n sridharan dysfunctional in their so the expected stream of The next day I return to Manhatown unique ways — is wellgodmen and faith healers. tan to meet with a pair of nuclear hidden and never disAnd while Birju lies mute physicists. She’s English, he’s Indian. cussed. If honesty is a through the circus that goes They met and married in Bombay mandatory responsibility on around him, Ajay is conwhen I was a struggling cartoonist of literature, Akhil Sharfounded by the darkness that Ex-cons, more than and they were PhD students. Now ma’s Family Life has to be has gripped his family. He the rest of us, need they live in the UK and Europe, so we considered an important tries to cope as best as he can their privacy rarely meet. We stroll in Central Park contribution. Very rarely — he lionises his brother at talking continuously. Alongside us in contemporary literaschool, inventing stories Pune, Chennai, Hyderabad, Jaim Prakash Gupta didn’t know En- joint managing director of Ashiana Housing. there Bangalore, are break-dance performers, ture has a home been about his bravery, strength The company has projects in Jaipur and La- pur and Goa are among the preferred glish when he went to the US for summer brides in frothing white cities. placed under such a harsh and intelligence. At home, he growing steadily.

When we higher studies in 1970. His univer- vasa as well. “Another project in Bhiwadi will “The lacedemand and vastisfleets of cyclists.

We aplight that its constituents watches his mother’s unfailstarted (in10-foot-long 2001), the concept was new.

Gupta, whose next who sity in Oklahoma had a tie-up with be ready by October,” says plaud a young Bengali creates bubbles using a Now it have turned out to be ing faith in the prospect that Family is well-known.

It will take a few more years for the residents ofLife a local senior living project to target is Chennai. bucket of bubble-mixture and heavy cotton cord, while his merely flawed humans — Birju will magically recover Sharma the market to mature,” says Shashank Parateach theAkhil language.

Gupta not only learnt Enbrother operates an ice-cream cart.

After lunch we visit a wonnot revered fathers and reone day and his father’s lonenjape, MD, Paranjape Schemes glish, hePenguin also saw how the elderly were cared Retirement planning derful show of Paul Gauguin’s wood-cuts, paintings andConstruction. carvFiction spected mothers. ly spiral into alcoholism.

His company has five senior living projects in for at the centre with special medical, recreBy 2025, there will be around 173 million peoings at the Museum of Modern Art. ₹499 Sharma borrows braveWhen Ajay starts reading, it Pune, under the Athashri ational and other facilities geared to their ple who are over 60 in India, The following day is Tamil New Year, so I go with my Long Is- brand, ly from real life. In the is about Hemingway. In interand six more planned across the needs. Almost 25 years later, when Gupta was more than double the 76 million land friends to the local temple. I am uncomfortable with orga1970s, a year or so after Sharma and his views, Sharma mentions that he threw country. trying to sell his residential project in Bhiwa- today. Like Ashiana, manynised devel-religion, but the temple is veryentire well maintained.

All the family emigrate to the US, his brother, a away 7,000 pages of the book. The prose is In glass the cases. past, Isenior di, on the outskirts of Delhi, he found that opers including Paranjape deities look well-dressed, smiling in their tell my-housing young teen, dives into a swimming pool. sparse, like Hemingway’s, and that makes projects largely came up in tier II most of the buyers were senior citizens who Schemes, LIC Housing Finance self that it’s really only another kind of the Museum, with Faith His head hits the bottom and he lies unthe honesty that Sharma demonstrates and III cities as thesetowere to of Art were drawn to the vast open spaces and affor- and Tata Housing are eager The cost of building instead as its focus.

Afterwards we go downstairs the seen as conscious underwater for three minutes. even more brutal. As a book critic, I have preferred destinations.

But tier I dable pricing on offer. That immediately grab a share of the lucrative a senior residential excellent canteen.

Then it’s Monday and time to leave. On a sinThese three minutes change the lives of many quibbles with the book. The narracities such as Mumbai, Bangaliving brought back memories from his university ₹4,000-crore assisted gle project with special subway fare, I travel right across the city, going West and everyone around him. Birju, as the older tive is slow up until the accident. Little lore and Chennai are now in dedays and he was soon researching the poten- market in India. facilities is higher North, all the way to Riverside, to stay with an art dealer friend brother is called in the book, becomes Ajay’s conversations with god seem forced saysand Sridhar.

Key tial for senior housing in India.

“Demand is expected to grow compared to She is mand and her very friendly cat, Blu. chic andtoo, blonde her brain-damaged. He is blind and will never and fake. The writing could have been a projects have been launched and five By 2003, his company, Ashiana Housing, significantly over the next regular ones apartment is full of amazements: 10-foot tall Chinese porcelain walk or talk. Sharma tells the story lot less sparse. Sharma starts the story the masks. response will nonbe keenly de-ornate bronze birdcages, African was ready with its first project for senior citi- to 10 years. More real-estate vases, We talk through Ajay, the younger boy, who is the when he is a 40-year-old but does not comwatched, he adds. segzens at Bhiwadi, replete with elderly-friendly velopers will explore this stop!

For two days! helpless witness to how acutely the family plete that cycle and bring us back to that There several features such as grab-bars in bathrooms, anti- ment as part of their larger, Then it’s time for me to leave once more, by are subway andreasons bus. that unravels after the tragedy. age. But as a reader, all I’ll say is that I finare fuelling the demand skid tiles, low-height shelves, ambulance-on- integrated township developEight hours later I’m back in Elsewhere. Five pounds heavier, for asAfter two years in a hospital and a nursished it in four hours straight, without ments. Cities that havetired tradicall and many more. and sleepy, happy to be home. sisted living. “The biggest threat ing home, Ajay’s parents decide to bring putting the book down once. As testa“The response to the project was stupen- tionally been retirement destinations will see in cities is the lack of physical security for the Birju home and look after him themments go, that is a far more compelling reelderly.

Moreover, dueofto reathan other parts of author dous. We hit the high market, selling 630 significantly more projects MANJULA PADMANABHAN, and artist, tells us tales hersocio-cultural parallel life in selves. His mother throws herself into the flection of the book than any other. sons, people don’t want to stay with their seniorUSA, consultant, homes in less than three years, instead of the the country,” says B Sridhar,

marginalien.blogspot.in Elsewhere in this fortnightly series. role of nurse and eternal champion. The targeted four years,” says Ankur Gupta, son of Strategic Consulting (Education, Healthcare daughters. And if children are living abroad, veena venugopal father is overwhelmed, turns inward and parents find it difficult to adjust there,” says the now-deceased Om Prakash Gupta and the and Senior Living) at JLL India.

The slow unravelling

Rarely in contemporary literature has a home been placed under such a harsh light that its constituents have turned out to be merely flawed humans

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Retired smart

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As the 60-plus population surges in India, developers are designing unique spaces catering to the booming demand for assisted living — a lucrative ₹4,000-crore market

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Best moves Sports, shopping and socialising are a favourite with many in the postretirement years

Dr Sheelu Srinivasan, the founder of Dignity Foundation, which has a senior living project in Neral, about 80km from Mumbai.

Breathe easy Ashiana Housing in Bhiwadi, near Delhi, has grab-bars in bathrooms, anti-skid tiles, low-height shelves, ambulance-on-call, and other facilities geared to the various needs of senior citizens

The price and the promise Under assisted living, the elderly look forward to an environment in which all their needs are met. Sanjeev Sathe, an air-conditioning consultant to industries and commercial projects, chose a project in Lavasa for his wife and him. “I spend four to six weeks with my son in the US. Rest of the time, I am in India. The facility has like-minded people in a similar age bracket,” he says. In contrast to Mumbai, where Sathe has spent a better part of his life, at the facility people have time to socialise and interact with each other. The pleasant weather round the year at Lavasa is another major attraction.

Little wonder then, that when Srinivasan launched her project in picturesque Neral in 2006, the 62 cottages were sold within days. It has 100 residents at the moment, and she is ready to start the next phase.

Compared to regular housing, it costs more to build a senior residential project with special facilities and large common spaces for recreation and medical services. “Our capex for these projects is about 30 per cent higher,” says Paranjape.

The construction cost of about ₹1,300 per sqft increases by ₹50-100 in senior housing

projects, says Gupta. “But the selling rates are market-driven. It depends on the demandsupply situation,” he adds. So while Ashiana’s projects in Bhiwadi and Lavasa sell at rates similar to those of other housing projects, the prices in Jaipur are higher because of greater demand there.

“We sell at market price (without charging premium) because they are made for senior citizens, who have limited money to spend,” says Paranjape.

tals business,” says Tara Singh Vachani, CEO of Antara Senior Living.

Like in most such projects, the apartments here have wheelchair manoeuvrability, senior-friendly furniture, use of large diffused lights rather than point illumination to reduce the intensity and emergency call buttons among other features.

“Seniors prioritise their health and happiness over other things. And we ensure they get that in our project,” says Vachani.

Living arrangements The wonder years As the concept of senior housing is still taking The need, however, is to go beyond just the root in India, there isn’t a one-size-fits-all ap- physical infrastructure, says JLL’s Sridhar. “Inproach. The only pre-condition is that at least dian companies need to learn a lot from the one of the residents in each house should be developed markets in terms of service delivaged above 55. Children can buy ery,” he says. the houses for their elderly parents Srinivasan agrees: “Housing for seas well. nior citizens is not just about brickFor now, developers follow their and-mortar. It is about providing individual models. Ashiana, for incomprehensive care along with housstance, sells the house and charges ing.” So her team brings in a music Now, I have a monthly maintenance fee from teacher for interested residents, or arreclaimed my the residents. Medical services are ranges for interesting craft material life. I am charged according to use. Paranjpe for those eager to get their creative re-living charges a one-time deposit of ₹3 juices flowing. college days lakh, and there is no monthly This is completely in tune with the maintenance fee. Food is charged findings of a study conducted by AZ at ₹40 per meal. “We don’t make Research Company in early 2013 profit on services like food. Our which showed that more than 75 per non-profit foundation takes care of cent of the seniors surveyed wanted it,” he says. to socialise with others, go clubbing, party, exAs a trust, Dignity Foundation follows a dif- ercise, play sports and shop for luxury goods ferent model. It offers membership for a one- in their retirement years. time deposit of ₹14 lakh, of which ₹9.5 lakh is Alka Singh, the 50-year-old principal of refundable on expiry of the membership. Smart Kids International School in Jaipur, “The trust retains ₹4.5 lakh as maintenance swears by senior housing. She lives at the Ashand sinking fund,” says Srinivasan. An addi- iana facility with her husband and mother-intional ₹10,000 a month is charged for house- law. Her son works in Goa, while her architect keeping, security and medical facilities, and daughter lives in Chandigarh. ₹6,000 for food.

“I have started living my life now. I spent the With age, medical needs increase and it first five decades working hard to bring up helps to live in projects that offer specialised children and earn money. Now, I have rehealthcare. “When joints have problems and claimed my life. I am re-living my college balance is wavering, emergency response and days,” says Singh. Each evening, she looks forcare services become important,” says Gupta. ward to the musical concerts or games or bhaThat also explains why the Max Group decid- jans organised by the housing society. ed to enter the senior living space. In 2003, it “Sometimes, we all just cook and share our launched its first project — Antara Senior Liv- food. And since we have lived a major part of ing — at Purukul, in Dehradun, at an invest- life, there are enough tales to share with each ment of ₹515 crore. other and while away time,” she says.

“Max India is well-equipped to take care of the healthcare needs of seniors with its hospi- rashmi pratap

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Not in justcharge a jugaad fix Ben A newsman the no-nonsense dismal forebodings for the India growth but by Long knownelegantly as a Modicaptures loyalist, the Anandiben Patel sets many story, precedents arrives at an incomplete conclusion becoming Gujarat’s fifteenth chief minister

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Implosion India’s Tryst with Reality John Elliott HarperCollins ₹699

ndia in the first decade of this century was everyone’s favourite. Well, why not, given growth rates that averaged 7.7 per cent a year between 2001-02 and 2010-11.

True, there were many others that had previously grown faster for longer periods. But they mostly did under formal single-party rule (China, Taiwan), de facto single-party regimes (Japan, Singapore, Mexico), or outright military dictatorships (South Korea).

India, by contrast, appeared to offer a unique growth story, of a full-fledged democracy that gave every adult citizen — Dalit, Muslim, transgender or upper-caste Hindu — the right to vote.

The last decade also saw Indian companies build a global reputation underlined by a spate of cross-border acquisitions: Tata Group’s of Corus and JLR, Aditya Birla’s of Novelis and Bharti’s of Zain Africa. If to these, the prospect of a ‘demographic dividend’ from a rising proportion of its population in the working-age group — which China had successfully exploited from the 1970s till recently — was added, the India Growth Story looked both compelling and durable.

Besides, everyone wanted India to succeed, not the least because its growth model Right place Anandiben has often beenChina’s: describedbutas Narendra Modi’s right arm by special arrangement seemed less threatening than tressed by democracy, private entrepreneurMayof22, the BJP’s legislative led, and notnpart anyatgrand national strate- end. She is the most travelled minister in the Next to him, holding the flag’s mast was Modi. meeting inPower Ahmedabad, gy aimed atparty securing Great status. a te- cabinet. She logs in about one lakh kilometres The lone woman who accompanied them on Anandiben Patel waswitan- through the State annually.”

The last ary-eyed three years have, however, the yatra was Anandiben. as Gujarat’s chief nessed thisnounced optimism around a young, resurIndeed, under a section titled ‘Regular & Born into a farmer’s family in 1941 in the minister take over from Narendra “I Disciplined lifestyle’ in her profile, Anandiben Mehsana district of Gujarat, Anandiben was gent andtoaspirational nation give Modi. way to am grateful to Narendrabhai foritexpressing growing disappointment.

Partly, has to do details out her travels — a visit to some part of the eighth among 10 siblings — four brothers confidence inrates me. BJP is a party where women with growth dropping below 5 per cent, the State from Thursday to Sunday that in- and six sisters. While pursuing her graduaget respect.

I would keeppeople intactjointhe volves review of departments; meetings with tion, she also assisted her father at farming in a much scenario of nearly 10 million Of the people Democracy is drivingand the movement for accountability and change rajeevIn bhatt course development set byevery Narendrabhai,” ing theof country’s workforce year. In the ‘common citizens’ on Monday their fields.

1962, she married said 73-year-old who, reasonably along withpaying Amit Tuesday; and departmental heads eventthe of their not finding Mafatbhai Patel and the couple Shah, is often described as Modi’s‘dividend’ “left and onWhile jobs, the promised demographic Wednesday.

In his farewell the breadth of detail and ability to of forced de-leveraging. moved to Ahmedabad four years ‘Policy paralysis’ may right couldarms”. well turn a ‘nightmare’, threatening to speech in Ahmedabad, an emoweave together diverse strands of contempo- have also played later. aShe completed a dual Maspart, though I wouldn’t atWhen Anandiben thedemocracy. oath on May 23 as tional overwhelm even its took vibrant Modireality praised “Amitbhai” rary Indian make the book more Anandiben than a tach tersimportance in scienceto it. and too much Noreducation is democwas theThese fifteenth chief forebodings minister of Gujarat, she was for dismal are elegantly his read, work,where amid it a crowd clamuseful falls short, though, is in by racy while unless raising it twois children.

Their to blame, construed as noticed the BJP setting twin as the first captured in precedents the present— book’s title:woman Implo- ouring Amit Shah as argument.

CM. A si- when she made offeringfor a cogent central marriage however, did not last too something that limits the ability of the State news CM the author, State and as the mostdeserves educatedtoone. sion.ofThe John Elliott, be lent Anandiben had stood byIndia’s and record Take the contention about of two long. Mafatbhai politically into acquire swathes ofwas land for corpofor saving girls large The retired schoolbeing principal is an MSc, taken seriously, someone whoBEd hasand re- watched.

Despite reports of rivalry chronic underachievement, which is ascribed clined initially, but it was Anandirates, imposing projects on unwilling locals from drowning MEd, and gold medallist.

In his address to between ported ona India for the Financial Times, The the two “arms”, to an entrenched cultureAnandiof chalta hai (any- or showing ben whoits was groomed a career labour place.

Therefor are many party members, Modi is most Economist, Fortune andsaid, New “She Statesman forsuitaover ben’s the post of CM solutions). who would want thing elevation goes) andtojugaad (quick-fix in politics.

Muchand to even her see embarsuch a State this ble for decades: the post as be the most educatthree “I she waswill at the opening of the was inevitable.

These traits are “so deeply inrassment, even anas key to aMafatbhai revival of had sentiment. ed CM till factory date. Even in a conservative society grained into how India’s people (Maruti) in Gurgaon when (Indira) nounced contesting the The country’s chaoticfor democof that time, she the obtained higher education.”

Gandhi released first cars to customers on Pool party and to institutions function that elections on an to AAP ticket; their racy, according journalist and When his whirlwind 14 December 1983”. election campaign began Anandiben’s into politics performance plunge crumbles”.

They was not a children convinced otherwise. authorhim Elliott, creates an enviin You September, Modi left the can, then, expect fromday-to-day him the runper- planned one. Into quite a dramatic also contribute a tolerance of fashion, she Over nearlyronment three decades, “where Anandiben jugaad fixes has are Democracy has been ning of the her capable hands. spective ofState the in dispassionate outsider who was noticed by theand BJP in 1987 when she made moved from strength venal politicians self-servstrength the party. easy, andtowhere theinfailures of the single-largest Even India during Modi’s tenure, shesucceed. held multi- news knows and also wants it to for heroically jumping ing government officials, and into “a the Sardar In 1994, she was a ticket to the Sabthegiven system in terms of Rajya poor govagent for change pleThe keyknowledge portfolios —that urban development, comes from keenlyreveob- Sarovar two girls from ha and four years lack of reservoir interest to in save tackling later, sheweakened successfully conernance and instituin India nue andadisaster Taking a cue drowning, serving country management. where “virtually everything problems”.for which she won a bravery award. tested from tions the make Mandal constituency in the fatalism of chalta from Modi’s cabinet the is centre andfrom his conand its opposite are at true” evident the At Now, the time, she was teaching at Mohinaba Ka- Ahmedabad. hai I find this kind of analyIn the 2012 State a welcome safeassembly haven”. Itelecalso trol over ministries, Anandiben, as chief min- nya range of topics covered.

Vidyalaya in Ahmedabad. sis quite superficial at one level.Persuaded to tions, she contested the and Ghatlodia “blocks from changes acts asconan ister, hold 10 portfolios, including Thewill book hasover everything — the impact of join by aand party a strong female stituency andexcuse If jugaad thelooking laidbackfor chalta won with recordismargin.

She for awhat not being the ones she held earlier, and the all subject mat- voice, liberalisation (whose origins author tracAnandiben and quietly rose is the longest-serving hai approach are quickly the primary BJP minister in the State. achieved”. ters allotted to‘M’ other ministers.

Seenout as a through es tonot an unsigned document setting ranks, mirroring her mentor’s as- “She causes ofthe the country’s backwardness, what has the farsightedness required for a I would argue the opposite. It is democracy hard taskmaster, her no-nonsense governance five-year reform roadmap that was apparent- cent around same time.rates through the leader,” explains thethe high growth Statethe BJPsingle-largest chief R C Faldu.agent for that hassays been style is similar to Modi’s. ly drafted in early-1990

by Montek Singh Ahlu- last Indecade? the initial years, Anandiben name change That period was one made whereaIndian Despite her efficient administrative style, in India.

It helped destroy the back of Long known a Modi loyalist, she was re- for walia, which asthe latter subsequently herself through organisational entrepreneurs were her consumed

by Johnskills.

May- party workers are yet to upand to her. zamindari feudalism in warm the ’60s ’70sWhile , pave warded for herthe allegiance when he picked her confirmed!), unresolved problems of In a newly liberalised India, she was“spontaneentrusted she nard Keynes’ ‘animal spirits’.

Their relations with the bureauthe maintains way for thegood rise of lower castes in national to be hisversus successor, over other strong conten- with growth environment and land acquisithe responsibility offrom heading thehai Gujarat ous urge to action” — far chalta — led cracy, partyofmembers her, and as arstructures power insometimes the ’80s andsee ’90s is ders as Saurabh Patel and Nitin Patel — BJP’s tion such for large projects, dynasty politics, unMorcha.

In December 1991, themMahila to expand aggressively and go onduring an in- rogant andtheunfriendly. now driving movements Unsurprisingly, demanding acboth popular leaders of theofinfluential Patel the planned development our cities, height ofbinge insurgency in Kashmir, financed BJP lead- Anandiben’s vestment significantly only our defence “I should be countability from electedis:representatives community. thegraft energy and fi- er middle-classSaurabh protestsPatel, against and govMurli Manohar announced the ‘Rash- judged through large-scaleJoshi borrowings. not servants. by the smile myisface but for the and public Andon that neither jugaad nance minister brushed aside such ernance failures,however, businessman-politician nex- triya Yatra’ of from Kanyakumari to work It is Ekta the chickens this excessive risk-takthat Ihai! do.” nor chalta speculation.

“Anandiben, almostpolicies, every week, us, India’s defence and foreign and Srinagar.

On January 1992, Joshi hoisted ing by Indian Inc that26, have now come homethe to harishvora damodaran visits a district and stays there and overthe theUS. week- Indian relations with China, Pakistan flagcurrent for the first time ever at Lal Chowk. roost. The recession is largely a result rutam

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UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY

The other men in the Valley There is always more to a story than an empty house and more to a man than just his uniform

A day in the life of... A soldier deployed at a polling booth in Anantnag, several kilometres away from home, perhaps afp/rouf bhat

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Omair Ahmad is an author. His last book was on Bhutan

here is a small town in the Kashmir Valley, located in the district called Anantnag by some, Islamabad by others. The air is clean and sharp, coming fresh off the mountains. There is the perpetual sound of flowing water, small streams running to meet a river. On a day that was not quite summer and not quite fall, a shadow of a soldier fell across a wall of a house that had not been lived in for years.

It was only one of a number of abandoned houses in the town, all huddled together, as if their closeness to each other could make up for their emptiness within. At some point during the decades of fighting that has raged in the Valley, the owners of these houses, Hindus all, had fled to a life of unbelonging somewhere else. Soldiers lived in a camp there among those houses, guarding an emptiness and a temple surrounded by barbed wire, while the weeds grew and memories died. A Kashmiri friend of mine, seeing a photograph of the place, was stunned into uncharacteristic silence. When he spoke, it was with words that caught in his throat, “My closest friend and I played there, by that stream. That is his house. I don’t know where he is now, where his family has gone.”

But there is always more to a story than an empty house and more to a man than just his uniform. Even a photograph that shows just a shadow on the wall captures the aching loneliness, and a twist of unusual tales. Across the Valley, some distance from Anantnag, is a tourist resort called Sonamarg where a large gateway tells you that the Army welcomes your visit. It is a place of glaciers slowly retreating, leaving behind stones chewed into rubble through the centuries. The soil is thin, provid-

ing sustenance to grass, a few twisted trees, them in 2005, just after the municipal elecand nothing more. Nomads come and go on tions had taken place after more than two decshort stocky ponies, so the Army’s presence ades. The patriarch, an old man who moved seems overlarge, impossible to ignore. with less ease in his old age as his joints stiffSitting at a roadside tea stall, I was ap- ened and protested, was still fiery with pride. proached by a soldier who wanted to know He glanced with good-natured scorn at the solwhere I came from. When I mentioned Delhi, diers grinning shyly, “Do you think that it is where I had driven from, it did not seem to sat- they who keep me safe? No, it is my neighisfy him. He asked again, “But bours, who know me, who have where are you from?” The last known me all my life. It is among word lingered, questing. them, and because of them, that Unsure, but moved by his inI am safe.” sistence, I said, “Gorakhpur,” He was Kashmiri, he belonged.

Travelling through naming my father’s city in the He confidently claimed the love Kashmir, I have been State of Uttar Pradesh. His sudof his neighbours, Muslims all, approached so many den smile transformed his face who approached the Army camp times by shy, with childlike joy as he declared nervously, if they approached it homesick men who to his colleagues, “I told you so.” at all. He had some reason to, have told me that Turning back to me he said, “I, having been elected by them to they were from UP, too, am from Uttar Pradesh, and represent the town. In no elecand did I know we even had somebody from Gotion, in India or the wider world, their town? rakhpur in our regiment until had I ever run across this anomalast month.” He suddenly burst ly of minorities being over-repreinto a spate of confidences and sented in elections, usually they advice on how best to travel, and are under-represented, but in what to say so that I wouldn’t get the Kashmir Valley Hindus and caught behind the slow-moving Army con- Sikhs, representing less than a few percent of voys. “Stay with us,” he offered, presenting the the population were elected far beyond their one home he had, a tent in the mountains, to proportion during that municipal election. somebody from his own land.

Maybe the old man was right, maybe it was Travelling through Kashmir, where hun- love, of a sort. I do not know. dreds of thousands of soldiers and paramiliAnd that shadow upon that house was just tary personnel are deployed, I have been that, a passing moment, as the soldier ached approached so many times by shy, homesick for a home he had left, and the house ached for men who have told me that they were from UP, those that have left it, in a day that was not and did I know their town? quite summer, not quite fall, in a place I have And in that little town in Anantnag, among as yet to understand. those abandoned houses, there is one where a t@OmairTAhmad Hindu family still lived when I went to meet

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Making behenji cool Jatt, Juliet and jameen She might never agree to kiss onscreen, but she doesn’t mind being The story of new Punjabi cinema where themeet jatt hero is noSinha, longerwho a farmer but a city called ‘mera—maal’.

We Sonakshi has silenced critics slicker — tells of the decline of agriculture and a cinema fuelled by real estate money and appealed to the box office

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he tentatively steps out of her make- shifts. Director Prabhu Dheva, who’s worked up room in a transparent purple lace with her in R... Rajkumar and Rowdy Rathore, gown with a fitted bodice underneath. and is now wrapping up their third collaboraThe dress exposes much of her long tion, Action Jackson, jokingly accuses her of legs, something she studiously avoids doing confusing all her characters. The best part in her films. Her manager instructs all the about working at this breathless pace, she men loitering around the photo studio in cen- says, is that there’s never any time to brood tral Mumbai to vacate the room to put her cli- over failures. Not that she’s seen much of that ent, actress Sonakshi Sinha, at ease. Before the — four of her nine films have reached the halphotographer turns his lens on her, she takes lowed ₹100-crore benchmark. last-minute approvals from her staff. “Are you sure this looks fine?” she asks, unconvinced by Scene stealer their nods of approval. But once she looks into Of her recent releases, Sinha stood out in the the camera and the volume of the R... Rajkumar period romance Lootera, where she played soundtrack is turned up, her apprehensions Pakhi, the dying daughter of a Bengali zaminmelt away. She confidently pouts and poses, dar. A welcome change from the loud, mindplaying the perfect cover girl at a fashion mag- less, albeit successful masala entertainers that azine shoot. Within minutes, have dominated her repertoire, she slips into a new outfit, this she delivered a fine performtime a more comfortable kneeance, mature beyond her years. “I length skirt. Seated at the dressfelt like a point was proved. I was ing table in a corner of the being looked down on for the room, she sips a glass of diet cofilms I choose. People feel that Vidya Balan said no la and fidgets with her phone as you don’t need great acting actress has ever her hairstylist rolls her tresses chops to do them. Trust me, playplayed a TB patient into curlers. “I hate looking at ing those over-the-top characters better than me the mirror. I’m the one actress is not at all easy. But after Lootera, who gets ready the fastest and is everybody shut up,” she says. out of the van. I barely take half Accustomed to polarised feedan hour to do it. I don’t have the back on almost all her films, she patience,” says the 26-year-old admits it felt special to be unaniwith a laugh. mously lauded. “Vidya Balan spoke to me on Sinha’s release next week, Holiday — A soldier the phone for half an hour. She said no actress is never off duty, is her first this year. She’s cur- has ever played a tuberculosis patient better rently filming her maiden Tamil film, Lingaa, a than me. It meant the world coming from er the laughing stock.

Hesee washer a family man but period saga which will romance the the behind this cinema: The Green her,”new sheworld says, dreamily, closing her eyes.

Abhinot one superstar to flinch from gory fights was evi- Revolution 60-plus Rajinikanth.

Last as year, Sinha gone andSinha the advent the nav Kashyap, whowrong directed in her of debut dent from his films blood-splattered gandassa acted in four — Lootera, Once Upon a(axe) Time new economy.(2010), The prosperity shown in the film Dabangg says he never doubted on the movie poster.

TheBullet verbal exchange be- movies in Mumbai Dobaara!, Raja and R... Rajis the result of a liquidity surge due to her calibre.

“I wasn’t surprised at all by the pertween the hero—and villain oozedsong with apan skyrocketing kumar andthe made special prices and notconsulted because the formance. Theland makers of Lootera me exaggeratedpearances sense of pride and honour in two.

That’s and the State is improving. a cruel irony, beforeeconomy approaching Sonakshi,Inand I strongly was all the rageamount with theofviewers.

The jatt vir- the work some actors glut of glitzyher. films is itself recommended I knew shefuelled was upbytorealthe tue came from thedo land.

He two wrestled with his estate over years.

She’s money. part,” he says. The story of new Punjabi cineland for a living, whichused taught him hard work, to filming three to ma, wherethe theglowing jatt heroreviews, is in the city shorn of Despite Lootera was cupatience and simplicity. Land the cause four was movies at ofa his rustic virtue,from can be as an allegory riously absent theseen nomination lists of conflict in many movies. Histime, love sometimes of land ex- how the State ruined the countless awardsa flourishing shows thisagricultuyear. Altended to the village, the community and the working in ral sector and was left the peasant at the mercyfor of though Sinha consistently nominated country. Jatt was rooted in his world and de- the market. double The award, land is being sold, agriculture best actress the rest of the cast and fended its order to death. is declining is little industrial develcrew didn’tand findthere a mention.

“Disheartening opment.

Thehas new films where jatt negohow Lootera been held backthe from most of Plastic world tiates love triangles, cracks jokes the nominations this year.

Didn’t they and call itisa The jatt in the new movies is alienated from generally living it up, in is amotion, make-believe world masterpiece, poetry world-class his land. Away from the wellspring of his vir- as the seemingly prospering andinauthentic technicallyassuperior film when it retue, he is confused. He rarely fights. Pride and Punjab It looks as if it is one of those leased?economy.

That seems like qualification enough honour are no big issues. From a jovial hero, drug so rampant Punjab these days, to berackets, out there,” tweetedinthe actress in Januhe has turned into a comedian, and often he is which lulls the youth into aher falsehurt sense of comary. She further vocalised while achimself the butt of the joke. He has a gym- fort.

Thean State has failed farmcepting award, sayingitsithardworking was unfair that her crafted body and not the weather-beaten phy- er, and now it isfilm, failing its ambitious youth.reco-star in the Ranveer Singh, didn’t sique shaped by working the fields. In the me- ceive a nomination. tropolis, he is quite ill at ease. Most of the Quick service When filmmakers approach her for story humour in these movies comes from the jux- JS Cheema, who runs a post-production house narrations, Sinha makes sure she has her taposition of the rural and the urban. As the in Chandigarh, theher new to mother, Poonam likens Sinha, by sidecinema to vet the jatt virtue attenuates in the new films, he is no rustled food. That’s sothat trueshe’s if webound comproject.up It’sfast a well-known fact longer willing to die for his land but can glad- pare it to his own 1981 no-stripping cult classic Chann Pardeby a strict no-kissing, policy.

“We ly sell a few acres for a pile of cash. With its si featuring Puri, Amrish Puri I and Raj come from a Om certain kind of family. will not plush, gleaming sets, luxury cars and stylish Babbar.

It had the flavour of the saag or that had let my daughter wear skimpy clothes dance girls in skimpy dresses, it is hardly the real simmered in an earthen pot on she a smouldering at a wedding.

And why should when she’s Punjab. It is the cinema of the shopping mall, chulha forso hours.

“Sometimes, thefact, editing so achieved much without it. In afterisDanot an unlikely phenomenon in a State flush poor, becomes struggle for me. bangg,dubbing everybody thoughtashe was a breath of with money from the property boom.

Many of She these guysthe are wedding photografresh air. is like daughter every parent The decline of the jatt from a proud hero to phers-turned-music-video-makers-turned wants and wife every husband looks for,” says a bumbling comedian is tragic, if we consider film directors,” he says.

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Balle Balle times Movies like Jatt Airways are the cinema of the shopping mall; all glitz and show

Rest assured Sinha basks in the confidence that comes with delivering four ₹100-crore films early in her career rohan shrestha

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t’s about time Romeo met a Punjabi jatti or Juliet met a jatt. Punjabi ballads are so full of doomed love, heartbreaking ironies, feuding clans and ruinous fate that Shakespeare can surely find a home away from home in a Punjabi cover of his most famous tragedy.

But Jatt and Juliet, the biggest blockbuster of Punjabi cinema, is actually a romantic comedy. Juliet in the title hints at love in a foreign country, an altogether charming prospect for the Punjabi youth ever looking for a way out of the country. The 2012 smash hit launched a wave of clone comedies: Carry on Jatta, Jatt Airways, Jatt Boys, Jatts in Golmaal and Jatt in Mood, to name a few. Himesh Reshammiya is producing its Hindi remake with Akshay Kumar in the lead. It triggered a boom in Punjabi cinema which had faded due to terrorism over the ’80s and ’90s . Last year, almost every Friday a new movie was released.

The jatt genre in Punjabi cinema goes back to the ’80s . The jatt hero was at the centre of the moral universe of the village. Whenever it faced a threat, he restored order. A common way to establish the hero in those movies was to show him saving a girl from being raped. He was a simpleton but nev-

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Anurag Singh, the 36-year-old director of Sinha’s mother in is a telephone This Sinha might be selling herself short. As for Lin- she says, “Actually, I haven’t even seen Sholay.

Jatt and Juliet, one of theinterview. few exceptions. is perhaps Sinha is rarely village, asked tohe play an to gaa, it is understood that actresses normally I’ve seen a few of my father’s films, but other From a why small Kapurthala went urban girl her Allfilmmaking. her characters hailafrom Australia toage. learn After stint in have little to do in a Rajini movie. Producer/di- than that I never watched movies much. I was theBollywood, same socialhe background dressed came backand to are make Punjabi rector Arbaaz Khan, who gave Sonakshi her more interested in sports.” or sari. “I don’t demurely in a salwar-kameez Her mother, a beauty pageant winner in the films. Most of his fellow filmmakers are also first break, feels otherwise. “I think she’s doing Lootera al- the smart thing by working with so many su- ’60s, feels Sinha would have been equally sucthink I’ve ever mentioned young, so it’s cinema ofthis, thebut youth.

“In some so had anthese intimate kissing scene.parts I toldofVikram ways, films also have our own perstars early in her career. The problem with cessful had she pursued fashion designing, a (director Vikramaditya Motwane) film experience of migrating from ahis rural towas urban doing too many women-centric films is that subject she studied for three years at Mumfantastic there no wayculture I could shock,” do that he you have fewer projects to choose bai’s SNDT College. “As a child, settingbut and thewas resultant scene. changed I guess he knew in no-the from and not many male stars she used to make beautiful says.And Hehe admits the it. gleaming Punjab body couldis play Pakhi like of me.prosperity So some people sketches. She would throw movies a reflection that has want to work with you. Also, if you do come accommodate.

And if they can’t, I totally peak too early, it is difficult to susthem around and I would from selling land. understand. feelings.

I don’t see the tain,” he says. Kashyap concurs. keep collecting them. During It takesNo justhard ₹1 crore to produce a decent But I never felt like point in doing something her course, she topped all her movie.

With big stars, theI’m costnot cancomfortgo up to ₹5 “Talent alone won’t run your kitcha budding actress. ablecrore. with.”Jatt and Juliet made ₹35 crore, and its en. That’s the unfortunate truth. I assignments and was even I was close to 92kg made Student of the Year. Maysuccess has been pulling money from a flat- think the kind of films she’s doing Boxtened officereal firstestate market. But Anurag warns will help her develop a solid fan be some day she can start her Full and housemaybe Jatt and later Juliet isshe the biggest Sinhainsays she’scould noticed slight as base, Post-Lootera, can recent Punjabi blockbuster own label,” she says. She reckthat the boom cinema be asa fragile change in the rolesbubble. offered “Let to her. parons things turned around for the real estate meShe tellwas you, very branch out into different roles. ticularly excited about a biopic on Dalbir Kaur,are Even filma Nooran, theago firstatPunjabi Madhuri Dixitinfanticide. started herJatinder caSinha few years the few property dealers who finance movies course, female Mauhar, Sandhu’s short themaking sister ofprofits.

Sarabjit Singh,per who died in areturn La- reer34, film Fashion to enterWeek.

Cannes, allintern made from waves), with such films.”

Senthave as an Ninety cent never who whips up nervous energy to create a Lakme hore prisonanother after languishing there for 22can starkly realist cinema, believes people cannot college Mauhar he would rather good on says a stipend of ₹500 a make day, she wasmoto make movie.” he says.

“Yet, few years on the espionage charges. But she walked viesto within plump escortthe themainstream.

VIPs to their seats. One of keep on kid? watching romantic comedies alone. asked resist lure of overnight fame, mixing with That Lingaa andsays Ac- in- From outgirls of the film later. Apart bleak stories mustout find voice amid the scrambled youngand age,Sikandar Sinha hastell been a visitor at of themHe turned tohis be Salman, who was taken Hisa Mitti and holding pressfrom conferences,” has TevarNavleen starringLakhi.

Arjun“InvesKa- superstar tiondependent Jackson, she to her create youth embroiled in politics crime.

He is aback noise of jatts, Juliets Salman Khan’s Bandraand home.

Their to see her there.

He and oncejameen again told film writer poor like Asome of her otherhas fathers, meaningful Punjabi poetaPash now making a film on terrorism, the yesteryear actor-turned-BJP MP current Sha- to start sheddingcinema. weight and consider careerhad torswhich, are notagain deterred. veritable industry movies, is aup remake of athe film fromproviding the South.em- trughan said that being the son of the fields, he would flavourSinha of Punjabi cinema.

“Films on terrorand writer Salim Khan, are in films. sprung all over State, Holiday, too, to is aawide remake Tamil film close not sing of “your tastes”. ism, Operation Bluestar or the riots made friends.

In the late ’70s, they1984 worked on Over the next few decadent years, Sinha madeMaybe, a con- afployment rangeofofthe people.”

Thuppakki.

Sinha is are unapologetic about her Shaan, Dostana and Kaala Pathar. ter the decline of the jatt in“It Punjabi cinema, so far, create a dialogue around these is- scious likedon’t effort to drop kilos. took me so Property czars funding a cinema as cut films choices.

She reality admitsas it will take an of extraordinwetough would meet, Salman always directors like Mauhar retrieve son of sues or ask questions,” he says.

Though long — almost two years orcan more.

I usedthat to visit off from the islands luxury they “Whenever keeda in me,”isremembers aryconstruct script toinmake her accept something I had a filmi soil. club twice a day, and in between I arthouse cinema flourishingSin(Rajiv thethe health the middle of nowhere.

These saidPunjabi “But I never felt like a buddingNabar, actress. against herwill grain. my space.

Gur- would sleep because I was too tired to do anyNational Award-winner movies tell“I’m youvery littlehappy aboutin Punjab’s loud- ha.Sharma’s I was closeAnhe to 92kg.

I never gotand anyNavtej at- thing I love all thethe singing, dancing and action.

Ghore Da Daan dharminder is a freelance journalist Delhi vinder Singh’s else,” shekumar says. Yet, she insists this inwas est issues: drugs, pollution, cancer and, of Firstly, Those are the kind of films I like to watch as an tention from boys. Also, growing up in a film not in preparation for a film career, but to get audience,” she says. She sees no harm in hav- family, I had seen fame and recognition up healthier. Currently at her leanest, Sinha has ing her midriff constantly pinched or being close. I’m used to people being in awe of my fa- hired a personal trainer and has miraculously referred to as ‘mera maal’ by Akshay Kumar’s ther. So nothing about that life fascinated me.” managed to drop a few dress sizes. “When Salcharacter in Rowdy Rathore and being the Apart from Anil Kapoor’s children — Sonam, man told me he wanted Sonakshi for Da‘bhaari piece’ in the Son of Sardaar. Laughing Rhea and Harshvardhan, and Hema Malini’s bangg, I was a little surprised. I remembered at reviews that label her movies as socially re- daughters — Esha and Ahana, who lived down her as a plump kid. I hadn’t seen the transforgressive, Sinha says, “Everybody has an opin- the lane from her home, she doesn’t remem- mation,” says Khan. ion. I don’t read reviews because I know critics ber having any star kids as friends.

Kashyap was equally sceptical of signing don’t appreciate my movies, and they never “My close friends are from school and col- her on. He was especially worried after seeing will. Mujhe box office se matlab hain (I’m lege. Even now I prefer to meet them instead a few unimpressive pictures taken by an amamore concerned about the box office).” of attending film parties. When I’m busy, they teur. He felt more at ease after befriending her Given that most of her films — be it Holiday, come and spend time with me on the set,” says on Facebook, and when he finally met her at Son of Sardaar or Dabangg — are driven by Sinha. Ask her about her favourite movies and Salman’s house, he knew his search was over. their leading male superstars, it appears as if she draws a blank. After some serious thought, “I found her very attractive and she spoke good Hindi. She was very confident,” he says.

Her first-ever shot for Dabanng, in which she n 2010, Jaideep Varma’s Leaving Home: The up comedy scene in India against the back- lack of patience and my utter inability to ran into a hospital after her brother in the film Life and Music of Indian Ocean became the drop of a society quick to take offense but slow think of money over and above everything was injured, was approved in a single take. first documentary to get a theatrical re- to laugh at itself. Varma talks about making else. And how devoid of logic and heart the “Sonakshi was not at all nervous. She gets her lease in India. It then went on to win a Na- documentaries on a shoestring budget in Bol- film business in India is for the most part. confidence from her father. But unlike him, tional Award in 2011. But nothing has come lywood-obsessed India and on the fine art of she’s punctual on the sets. She saves her proeasy for the filmmaker, who made his feature sticking it out. Excerpts from the interview: How did you get interested in the stand-up ducers a lot of money by being on time. Her fafilm debut in Bollywood with Hulla in 2008 comedy scene in India? ther used to be late by many hours. That’s one I have two good friends in stand-up comedy thing she’s not learnt from him,” says her and then switched to making documentaries Leaving Home was the first documentary for practical reasons — they were cheaper, to release commercially in Indian theat- — Andy Zaltzman in London and Varun Grover mother, adding quickly that her husband more flexible to shoot and needed a smaller res, paving the way for many others. How in Mumbai. Through their work, I got into the would make up for his tardiness by finishing crew. He’s also written a novel Local, and creat- tough was it to pull off? stand-up scene. I am Offended is a lively conver- his scenes at the speed of lightning. ed the widely used alternative cricketing staIt was very tough, enough to put me off sation through interviews and show footage tistic, ‘Impact Index’. His upcoming meeting business people for the rest of my with clips from TV shows and internet acts. The ‘content’ star documentary I am Offended looks at the stand- life. It also scarily showed up my fundamental The film is as much about humour and its me- In conversations with Sinha’s family, friends chanics as a portrait of a modern-day young and staff, a word that often crops up to deIndia, and all. We spoke to people like scribe mentary First dibs In her superhit debut film Dabangg with co-star Salman Khan Off the beaten path With Ranveer Singhwarts at a promotional event for Lootera her is makers ‘content’.inByIndia? her own admission, Anuvab Pal, Vir Das, Gursimran Khamba, Tan- she isShowing films once or they are made.acAnd the leastthe competitive ambitious may Bhatt, Johnny Lever, Raju Srivastav, Rajeev tress having the audience pay for them.

The interof her generation. On the talk show KofNigam, Aditi Mittal, Sorabh Pant, Ashish Shak- feenet the best bet, ofKapoor course,recently but those who Kareena said withis Karan, ya, Papa CJ, Sundeep Rao, Vikram Sathaye, Sun- that want their money back have to struggle.

Sinha would make a good housewife if deep Sharma and Nishant Joke Singh. she weren’t an actress. Sinha said she was spot advice would you give totill anrecentaspiring on.What She confessed that her only goal Why do you think we are so defensive and ly had documentary filmmaker in India? been to get married and have two chilso quick to take offense? it yourself.

Youclearly can now filmmaking dren.Do Those plans are on — hold for now is We are just a thin-skinned race, lacking iro- and, getting cheaper every day.

Make your yet, she says she still single gives off a “gharelu ny and the ability to laugh at ourselves as vibe”. first“I two-three films by yourself andconhave have no insecurities.

I have not much as we should, given our diversity. If the formed something toissay.

Most importantly, to what expected of a typicalfocus hero- on minority that is not like this can influence inethat more than how you shoot.

TheI’m craftsowill nowadays.

And that’s because some part of the majority which is, that would comfortable take care with of itself when you concentrate myself. Young girls tell me be a great change. But tolerance is sadly not I’menough on having something say. Filmmaka role model.

I can’t think of atobetter comour strong suit and doesn’t seem to be a prior- pliment,” ing, contrary to what a lot of people like to she says. ity either. project, is not rocket science.

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Documentary maker Jaideep Varma on the importance of laughing at one’s self and why filmmaking is not rocket science

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mohini chaudhuri Supernova ahead Sinha features in Rajinikanth’s next (after Kochadaiiyaan) On a roll Saif Ali Khan takes Sinha for a spin in the action-packed Bullett Raja Funny men In I am Offended (above) Jaideep Varma (top) brings together India’s best comics What is the biggest challenge facing docu- kalpana nair is a Mumbai-based journalist

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Pipe dreams A child bathes in the Yamuna with water drawn from a government pipeline passing overhead at Nizamuddin Bridge

Work in progress A welder at the Signature Bridge construction site on the dried-up Yamuna riverbed near Majnu ka Tilla

Death metals Wastewater, poisonous chemicals, and toxic metals from major sewers and industries are discharged into the river every day at the Okhla Barrage. The government has invested about ₹1,600 crore in the latest ‘Yamuna Action Plan’ devised to clean up the river

A river runs through it Chronicling the death of the Yamuna as it winds its way through the apathy and selfishness of the capital city

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have always wondered why mankind has chosen to live by the banks of rivers. It was this question that led me to the Yamuna too.

What is this river? Who are the people who live along its banks? What are their many stories?

Today, by its waters we see fields of what are perhaps toxic vegetables, and thatched-roof huts crowned by Tata Sky dish antennae.

Walking along the banks of the Yamuna, trying to understand and photograph its various avatars, my attention was once drawn to a handpump in Soniya Vihar. That people living right on the waterfront do not dare use the water for drinking, hit me hard. It was then that I realised that there was not a single drop of clean water left in this once mighty river.

I started documenting the Yamuna last April.

The river, which originates 375km north of the Capital at the Yamunotri Glacier in Uttarakhand, is relatively unpolluted until it enters Delhi.

Eighty per cent of all the pollutants are dumped into it along a stretch that accounts for a mere

two per cent of its total length — the 22km segment that flows through the city. The river is broad and swift when it reaches the Capital, yet it can’t be used for domestic purposes. Yamuna is polluted not only by people worshipping here and immersing idols, but by the colossal effluents of factories which empty their toxic waste into it.

While chronicling it, I bore witness to the various activities that it supports on its banks. People eke out a living by the riverside, children play in its dark waters, others come at times of festivals or bereavement. In summer it flows slow and sluggish, in the monsoons it turns into a torrent, threatening to engulf the settlements along its shifting margins.

One can only hope that the committee formed this month by the city’s Lieutenant Governor Najeeb Jung won’t disappoint like others before it, and would set the river and those that depend on it on a new course. surender solanki is a Delhi-based photographer

Edge of darkness A man performs Hindu rituals for his dead father at Soniya Vihar

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Tickled pink A washerman works on the riverbank at Shastri Park. Around 250 families from the slums nearby run most of the dhobi ghats here. The city’s small hotels, hospitals and catering companies are their main customers

Final rites Relatives prepare for a cremation on the banks of the river at Nigam Bodh Ghat at Kashmere Gate

Bubble bath A man takes a ‘holy dip’ in the river at Kalindi Kunj, Okhla. The river here is particularly polluted with white chemical foam from neighbouring factories

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Making behenji cool Jatt, Juliet and jameen She might never agree to kiss onscreen, but she doesn’t mind being The story of new Punjabi cinema where the jatt hero is noSinha, longerwho a farmer but a city called ‘mera—maal’.

We meet Sonakshi has silenced critics slicker — tells of the decline of agriculture and a cinema fuelled by real estate money and appealed to the box office

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he tentatively steps out of her make- shifts. Director Prabhu Dheva, who’s worked up room in a transparent purple lace with her in R... Rajkumar and Rowdy Rathore, gown with a fitted bodice underneath. and is now wrapping up their third collaboraThe dress exposes much of her long tion, Action Jackson, jokingly accuses her of legs, something she studiously avoids doing confusing all her characters. The best part in her films. Her manager instructs all the about working at this breathless pace, she men loitering around the photo studio in cen- says, is that there’s never any time to brood tral Mumbai to vacate the room to put her cli- over failures. Not that she’s seen much of that ent, actress Sonakshi Sinha, at ease. Before the — four of her nine films have reached the halphotographer turns his lens on her, she takes lowed ₹100-crore benchmark. last-minute approvals from her staff. “Are you sure this looks fine?” she asks, unconvinced by Scene stealer their nods of approval. But once she looks into Of her recent releases, Sinha stood out in the the camera and the volume of the R... Rajkumar period romance Lootera, where she played soundtrack is turned up, her apprehensions Pakhi, the dying daughter of a Bengali zaminmelt away. She confidently pouts and poses, dar. A welcome change from the loud, mindplaying the perfect cover girl at a fashion mag- less, albeit successful masala entertainers that azine shoot. Within minutes, have dominated her repertoire, she slips into a new outfit, this she delivered a fine performtime a more comfortable kneeance, mature beyond her years. “I length skirt. Seated at the dressfelt like a point was proved. I was ing table in a corner of the being looked down on for the room, she sips a glass of diet cofilms I choose. People feel that Vidya Balan said no la and fidgets with her phone as you don’t need great acting actress has ever her hairstylist rolls her tresses chops to do them. Trust me, playplayed a TB patient into curlers. “I hate looking at ing those over-the-top characters better than me the mirror. I’m the one actress is not at all easy. But after Lootera, who gets ready the fastest and is everybody shut up,” she says. out of the van. I barely take half Accustomed to polarised feedan hour to do it. I don’t have the back on almost all her films, she patience,” says the 26-year-old admits it felt special to be unaniwith a laugh. mously lauded. “Vidya Balan spoke to me on Sinha’s release next week, Holiday — A soldier the phone for half an hour. She said no actress is never off duty, is her first this year. She’s cur- has ever played a tuberculosis patient better rently filming her maiden Tamil film, Lingaa, a than me. It meant the world coming from er the laughing stock.

Hesee washer a family man but period saga which will romance the her,” the new behind this cinema: The Green sheworld says, dreamily, closing her eyes.

Abhinot onesuperstar to flinch from gory fights as was evi- nav 60-plus Rajinikanth.

Last year, Sinha Revolution gone andSinha the advent of the Kashyap, whowrong directed in her debut dent from his films blood-splattered gandassa acted in four — Lootera, Once Upon a(axe) Time film new Dabangg economy.(2010), The prosperity shown in the says he never doubted on the movie poster.

TheBullet verbal exchange be- her in Mumbai Dobaara!, Raja and R... Rajmovies is the result of a liquidity surge due to calibre.

“I wasn’t surprised at all by the pertween the hero—and villain oozedsong with apan formance. kumar andthe made special skyrocketing prices and notconsulted because the Theland makers of Lootera me exaggerated sense of pride and honour pearances in two.

That’s and the before State economy is improving. a cruel irony, approaching Sonakshi,Inand I strongly was all the rage with the The jatt vir- recommended amount ofviewers. work some actors the glut of glitzy films is itself her.

I knew shefuelled was upby torealthe tue came from thedo land.

He two wrestled with his part,” over years.

She’s estate he money. says. The story of new Punjabi cineland for a living, which taught him hard work, used to filming three to ma, wherethe theglowing jatt heroreviews, is in the city shorn of Despite Lootera was cupatience and simplicity. Land the cause four was movies at ofa riously his rustic virtue,from can be as an allegory absent theseen nomination lists of conflict in many movies. Histime, love sometimes of land ex- the how countless the State ruined awardsa flourishing shows this agricultuyear. Altended to the village, the community and the working in though ral sector and was left the peasant at the mercyfor of Sinha consistently nominated country. Jatt was rooted in his world and de- the market. double The award, land is being sold, agriculture best actress the rest of the cast and fended its order to death. is declining is little industrial develcrew didn’t and findthere a mention.

“Disheartening opment.

Thehas new films where jatt negohow Lootera been held backthe from most of Plastic world tiates love triangles, cracks jokes and itisa the nominations this year.

Didn’t they call The jatt in the new movies is alienated from masterpiece, generally living it up, in is amotion, make-believe world poetry world-class his land. Away from the wellspring of his vir- and as inauthentic the seemingly prospering technicallyassuperior film when it retue, he is confused. He rarely fights. Pride and leased?

Punjab economy.

It looks as if it is one of those That seems like qualification enough honour are no big issues. From a jovial hero, to drug so rampant Punjab these days, berackets, out there,” tweetedinthe actress in Januhe has turned into a comedian, and often he is ary. which lulls the youth into aher falsehurt sense of comShe further vocalised while achimself the butt of the joke. He has a gym- cepting fort. Thean State has failed farmaward, sayingits it hardworking was unfair that her crafted body and not the weather-beaten phy- co-star er, and now it isfilm, failing its ambitious youth.rein the Ranveer Singh, didn’t sique shaped by working the fields. In the me- ceive a nomination. tropolis, he is quite ill at ease. Most of the Quick service When filmmakers approach her for story humour in these movies comes from the jux- narrations, JS Cheema, who runs a post-production house Sinha makes sure she has her taposition of the rural and the urban. As the mother, in Chandigarh, theher new to Poonam likens Sinha, by sidecinema to vet the jatt virtue attenuates in the new films, he is no project. rustled up food. That’s sothat trueshe’s if we comIt’s fast a well-known fact bound longer willing to die for his land but can glad- by pare it to his own 1981 no-stripping cult classic Chann Pardea strict no-kissing, policy.

“We ly sell a few acres for a pile of cash. With its come si featuring Puri, Amrish PuriI and Raj from a Om certain kind of family. will not plush, gleaming sets, luxury cars and stylish let Babbar.

It had the flavour of the saag or that had my daughter wear skimpy clothes dance girls in skimpy dresses, it is hardly the real simmered in an earthen pot onshe a smouldering at a wedding.

And why should when she’s Punjab. It is the cinema of the shopping mall, chulha forso hours. thefact, editing so achieved much“Sometimes, without it. In afterisDanot an unlikely phenomenon in a State flush poor, becomes struggle for me. bangg,dubbing everybody thoughtashe was a breath of with money from the property boom.

Many of She these guys wedding photografresh air. is like theare daughter every parent The decline of the jatt from a proud hero to phers-turned-music-video-makers-turned wants and wife every husband looks for,” says a bumbling comedian is tragic, if we consider film directors,” he says.

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Balle Balle times Movies like Jatt Airways are the cinema of the shopping mall; all glitz and show

Rest assured Sinha basks in the confidence that comes with delivering four ₹100-crore films early in her career rohan shrestha

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t’s about time Romeo met a Punjabi jatti or Juliet met a jatt. Punjabi ballads are so full of doomed love, heartbreaking ironies, feuding clans and ruinous fate that Shakespeare can surely find a home away from home in a Punjabi cover of his most famous tragedy.

But Jatt and Juliet, the biggest blockbuster of Punjabi cinema, is actually a romantic comedy. Juliet in the title hints at love in a foreign country, an altogether charming prospect for the Punjabi youth ever looking for a way out of the country. The 2012 smash hit launched a wave of clone comedies: Carry on Jatta, Jatt Airways, Jatt Boys, Jatts in Golmaal and Jatt in Mood, to name a few. Himesh Reshammiya is producing its Hindi remake with Akshay Kumar in the lead. It triggered a boom in Punjabi cinema which had faded due to terrorism over the ’80s and ’90s . Last year, almost every Friday a new movie was released.

The jatt genre in Punjabi cinema goes back to the ’80s . The jatt hero was at the centre of the moral universe of the village. Whenever it faced a threat, he restored order. A common way to establish the hero in those movies was to show him saving a girl from being raped. He was a simpleton but nev-

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Anurag Singh, the 36-year-old director of Sinha’s mother in is a telephone This Sinha might be selling herself short. As for Lin- she says, “Actually, I haven’t even seen Sholay.

Jatt and Juliet, one of theinterview. few exceptions. is perhaps Sinha is rarely village, asked tohe play an to gaa, it is understood that actresses normally I’ve seen a few of my father’s films, but other From a why small Kapurthala went urban girl her Allfilmmaking. her characters hailafrom Australia toage. learn After stint in have little to do in a Rajini movie. Producer/di- than that I never watched movies much. I was theBollywood, same socialhe background dressed came backand to are make Punjabi rector Arbaaz Khan, who gave Sonakshi her more interested in sports.” salwar-kameez or sari. “I don’t demurely in a of Her mother, a beauty pageant winner in the films. Most his fellow filmmakers are also first break, feels otherwise. “I think she’s doing Lootera al- the smart thing by working with so many su- ’60s, feels Sinha would have been equally sucthink I’ve ever mentioned young, so it’s cinema ofthis, thebut youth.

“In some so had anthese intimate kissing scene.

I toldofVikram ways, films also have parts our own perstars early in her career. The problem with cessful had she pursued fashion designing, a (director Vikramaditya Motwane) film experience of migrating from ahis rural towas urban doing too many women-centric films is that subject she studied for three years at Mumfantastic there no wayculture I couldshock,” do that he you have fewer projects to choose bai’s SNDT College. “As a child, settingbut and the was resultant scene. changed I guess he knew in no-the from and not many male stars she used to make beautiful says.And Hehe admits the it. gleaming Punjab body couldisplay Pakhi likeof me.prosperity So some people sketches. She would throw movies a reflection that has want to work with you. Also, if you do come accommodate.

And if they can’t, I totally peak too early, it is difficult to susthem around and I would from selling land. understand. feelings.

I don’t see the tain,” he says. Kashyap concurs. keep collecting them. During It takesNo justhard ₹1 crore to produce a decent But I never felt like point in doing something her course, she topped all her movie.

With big stars, theI’m costnot can comfortgo up to ₹5 “Talent alone won’t run your kitcha budding actress. able with.” assignments and was even Jatt and Juliet made ₹35 crore, and its en. That’s the unfortunate truth. I crore.

I was close to 92kg made Student of the Year. Maysuccess has been pulling money from a flat- think the kind of films she’s doing Boxtened officereal firstestate market. But Anurag warns will help her develop a solid fan be some day she can start her Full and housemaybe Jatt and Juliet the biggest Sinha she’scould noticed slight as base, Post-Lootera, later isshe can recent Punjabi blockbuster own label,” she says. She reckthat the boom insays cinema be asa fragile change in the rolesbubble. offered “Let to her. parons things turned around for the real estate meShe tellwas you, very branch out into different roles. ticularly excited about a biopic on Dalbir Kaur,are Even filmaNooran, theago firstatPunjabi Madhuri Dixitinfanticide. started herJatinder caSinha few years the few property dealers who finance movies course, female Mauhar, Sandhu’s short themaking sister ofprofits.

Sarabjit Singh,per who died in areturn La- reer film Fashion to enterWeek.

Cannes, have allintern made from waves), films.”

Sent as an Ninety cent never 34,with whosuch whips up nervous energy to create a Lakme hore prisonanother after languishing there Mauhar he would rather good moon says a stipend of ₹500 a make day, she was to make movie.” he says.

“Yet,for few22can starkly realist cinema, believes people cannot college years on the espionage charges. But she walked viesto within plump kid? escortthe themainstream.

VIPs to their seats. One of keep on watching romantic comedies alone. asked resist lure of overnight fame, mixing with That Lingaa and Ac- in- From outgirls of the film later. Apart bleak stories mustout find amid the scrambled youngand age,Sikandar Sinha hastell been a visitor at of themHe turned tohis be voice Salman, who was taken Hisa Mitti and holding pressfrom conferences,” says has TevarNavleen starringLakhi.

Arjun“InvesKa- superstar tiondependent Jackson, she to her create youth embroiled in politics crime.

He is aback noise of jatts, Juliets Salman Khan’s Bandraand home.

Their to see her there.

He and oncejameen again told film writer poor like Asome of her otherhas fathers, meaningful cinema. poetaPash now making a film on terrorism, the yesteryear actor-turned-BJP MP current Sha- to start shedding weight Punjabi and consider careerhad torswhich, are notagain deterred. veritable industry movies, is aup remake of athe film fromproviding the South.em- trughan said that being the son of the fields, he would flavourSinha of Punjabi cinema.

“Films on terrorand writer Salim Khan, are in films. sprung all over State, Holiday, too, to is aawide remake Tamil film close not sing of “your tastes”. ism, Operation Bluestar or the 1984 riots made friends.

In the late ’70s, they worked on Over the next few decadent years, Sinha madeMaybe, a con- afployment rangeofofthe people.”

Thuppakki.

Sinha is are unapologetic about her Shaan, Dostana and Kaala Pathar. ter the decline of the in“It Punjabi cinema, so far, create a dialogue around these is- scious likedon’t effort to drop the jatt kilos. took me so Property czars funding a cinema as cut films choices.

She reality admitsas it the will islands take an of extraordinwetough would meet, Salman always directors like Mauhar retrieve that son of sues or ask questions,” he says.

Though long — almost two years orcan more.

I used to visit off from luxury they “Whenever in me,”isremembers aryconstruct script toinmake her accept something I had a arthouse filmi keeda soil. club twice a day, and in between I Punjabi cinema flourishingSin(Rajiv thethe health the middle of nowhere.

These said “But I never felt like a buddingNabar, actress. against herwill grain. my space.

Gur- would sleep because I was too tired to do anyNational Award-winner movies tell“I’m youvery littlehappy aboutin Punjab’s loud- ha.Sharma’s I was closeAnhe to 92kg.

I never gotand anyNavtej at- thing I love all thethe singing, dancing and action.

Ghore Da Daan dharminder is a freelance journalist Delhi vinder Singh’s else,” shekumar says. Yet, she insists this inwas est issues: drugs, pollution, cancer and, of Firstly, Those are the kind of films I like to watch as an tention from boys. Also, growing up in a film not in preparation for a film career, but to get audience,” she says. She sees no harm in hav- family, I had seen fame and recognition up healthier. Currently at her leanest, Sinha has ing her midriff constantly pinched or being close. I’m used to people being in awe of my fa- hired a personal trainer and has miraculously referred to as ‘mera maal’ by Akshay Kumar’s ther. So nothing about that life fascinated me.” managed to drop a few dress sizes. “When Salcharacter in Rowdy Rathore and being the Apart from Anil Kapoor’s children — Sonam, man told me he wanted Sonakshi for Da‘bhaari piece’ in the Son of Sardaar. Laughing Rhea and Harshvardhan, and Hema Malini’s bangg, I was a little surprised. I remembered at reviews that label her movies as socially re- daughters — Esha and Ahana, who lived down her as a plump kid. I hadn’t seen the transforgressive, Sinha says, “Everybody has an opin- the lane from her home, she doesn’t remem- mation,” says Khan. ion. I don’t read reviews because I know critics ber having any star kids as friends.

Kashyap was equally sceptical of signing don’t appreciate my movies, and they never “My close friends are from school and col- her on. He was especially worried after seeing will. Mujhe box office se matlab hain (I’m lege. Even now I prefer to meet them instead a few unimpressive pictures taken by an amamore concerned about the box office).” of attending film parties. When I’m busy, they teur. He felt more at ease after befriending her Given that most of her films — be it Holiday, come and spend time with me on the set,” says on Facebook, and when he finally met her at Son of Sardaar or Dabangg — are driven by Sinha. Ask her about her favourite movies and Salman’s house, he knew his search was over. their leading male superstars, it appears as if she draws a blank. After some serious thought, “I found her very attractive and she spoke good Hindi. She was very confident,” he says.

Her first-ever shot for Dabanng, in which she n 2010, Jaideep Varma’s Leaving Home: The up comedy scene in India against the back- lack of patience and my utter inability to ran into a hospital after her brother in the film Life and Music of Indian Ocean became the drop of a society quick to take offense but slow think of money over and above everything was injured, was approved in a single take. first documentary to get a theatrical re- to laugh at itself. Varma talks about making else. And how devoid of logic and heart the “Sonakshi was not at all nervous. She gets her lease in India. It then went on to win a Na- documentaries on a shoestring budget in Bol- film business in India is for the most part. confidence from her father. But unlike him, tional Award in 2011. But nothing has come lywood-obsessed India and on the fine art of she’s punctual on the sets. She saves her proeasy for the filmmaker, who made his feature sticking it out. Excerpts from the interview: How did you get interested in the stand-up ducers a lot of money by being on time. Her fafilm debut in Bollywood with Hulla in 2008 comedy scene in India? ther used to be late by many hours. That’s one I have two good friends in stand-up comedy thing she’s not learnt from him,” says her and then switched to making documentaries Leaving Home was the first documentary for practical reasons — they were cheaper, to release commercially in Indian theat- — Andy Zaltzman in London and Varun Grover mother, adding quickly that her husband more flexible to shoot and needed a smaller res, paving the way for many others. How in Mumbai. Through their work, I got into the would make up for his tardiness by finishing crew. He’s also written a novel Local, and creat- tough was it to pull off? stand-up scene. I am Offended is a lively conver- his scenes at the speed of lightning. ed the widely used alternative cricketing staIt was very tough, enough to put me off sation through interviews and show footage tistic, ‘Impact Index’. His upcoming meeting business people for the rest of my with clips from TV shows and internet acts. The ‘content’ star documentary I am Offended looks at the stand- life. It also scarily showed up my fundamental The film is as much about humour and its me- In conversations with Sinha’s family, friends chanics as a portrait of a modern-day young and staff, a word that often crops up to deIndia, and all. We spoke to people like scribe mentary First dibs In her superhit debut film Dabangg with co-star Salman Khan Off the beaten path With Ranveer Singhwarts at a promotional event for Lootera her is makers ‘content’.inByIndia? her own admission, Anuvab Pal, Vir Das, Gursimran Khamba, Tan- she isShowing films once or they are made.acAnd the leastthe competitive ambitious may Bhatt, Johnny Lever, Raju Srivastav, Rajeev tress having the audience pay for them.

The interof her generation. On the talk show KofNigam, Aditi Mittal, Sorabh Pant, Ashish Shak- feenet the best bet, ofKapoor course,recently but those who Kareena said withis Karan, ya, Papa CJ, Sundeep Rao, Vikram Sathaye, Sun- that want their money back have to struggle.

Sinha would make a good housewife if deep Sharma and Nishant Joke Singh. she weren’t an actress. Sinha said she was spot advice would you give totill anrecentaspiring on.What She confessed that her only goal Why do you think we are so defensive and ly had documentary filmmaker in India? been to get married and have two chilso quick to take offense? it yourself.

Youclearly can now filmmaking dren.Do Those plans are on — hold for now is We are just a thin-skinned race, lacking iro- and, getting cheaper every day.

Make your yet, she says she still single gives off a “gharelu ny and the ability to laugh at ourselves as vibe”. first“I two-three films by yourself andconhave have no insecurities.

I have not much as we should, given our diversity. If the formed something to is say.

Most importantly, to what expected of a typicalfocus hero-on minority that is not like this can influence inethat more than howthat’s you shoot.

TheI’m craftsowill nowadays.

And because some part of the majority which is, that would comfortable take care with of itself when you concentrate myself. Young girls tell me be a great change. But tolerance is sadly not I’menough on having something say. Filmmaka role model.

I can’t think of atobetter comour strong suit and doesn’t seem to be a prior- pliment,” ing, contrary to what a lot of people like to she says. ity either. project, is not rocket science.

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Take no offence

Documentary maker Jaideep Varma on the importance of laughing at one’s self and why filmmaking is not rocket science

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mohini chaudhuri Supernova ahead Sinha features in Rajinikanth’s next (after Kochadaiiyaan) On a roll Saif Ali Khan takes Sinha for a spin in the action-packed Bullett Raja Funny men In I am Offended (above) Jaideep Varma (top) brings together India’s best comics What is the biggest challenge facing docu- kalpana nair is a Mumbai-based journalist

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Not in justcharge a jugaad fix Ben A newsman dismal forebodings for the India growth but by Long knownelegantly as a Modicaptures loyalist, the no-nonsense Anandiben Patel sets manystory, precedents arrives at an incomplete conclusion becoming Gujarat’s fifteenth chief minister

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Implosion India’s Tryst with Reality John Elliott HarperCollins ₹699

ndia in the first decade of this century was everyone’s favourite. Well, why not, given growth rates that averaged 7.7 per cent a year between 2001-02 and 2010-11.

True, there were many others that had previously grown faster for longer periods. But they mostly did under formal single-party rule (China, Taiwan), de facto single-party regimes (Japan, Singapore, Mexico), or outright military dictatorships (South Korea).

India, by contrast, appeared to offer a unique growth story, of a full-fledged democracy that gave every adult citizen — Dalit, Muslim, transgender or upper-caste Hindu — the right to vote.

The last decade also saw Indian companies build a global reputation underlined by a spate of cross-border acquisitions: Tata Group’s of Corus and JLR, Aditya Birla’s of Novelis and Bharti’s of Zain Africa. If to these, the prospect of a ‘demographic dividend’ from a rising proportion of its population in the working-age group — which China had successfully exploited from the 1970s till recently — was added, the India Growth Story looked both compelling and durable.

Besides, everyone wanted India to succeed, not the least because its growth model Right place Anandiben has often beenChina’s: describedbutas Narendra Modi’s right arm by special arrangement seemed less threatening than tressed by democracy, private entrepreneurMayof22, the BJP’s legislative led, and notnpart anyatgrand national strateend. She is the most travelled minister in the Next to him, holding the flag’s mast was Modi. meeting Ahmedabad, gy aimed atparty securing GreatinPower status. a te- cabinet. She logs in about one lakh kilometres The lone woman who accompanied them on Anandiben Patel waswitan- through the State annually.”

The last ary-eyed three years have, however, the yatra was Anandiben. as Gujarat’s chief nessed thisnounced optimism around a young, resurIndeed, under a section titled ‘Regular & Born into a farmer’s family in 1941 in the minister take over from Narendra “I Disciplined lifestyle’ in her profile, Anandiben Mehsana district of Gujarat, Anandiben was gent andtoaspirational nation give Modi. way to am grateful to Narendrabhai foritexpressing growing disappointment.

Partly, has to do details out her travels — a visit to some part of the eighth among 10 siblings — four brothers confidence inrates me. BJP is a party where women with growth dropping below 5 per cent, the State from Thursday to Sunday that in- and six sisters. While pursuing her graduaget respect.

I would keeppeople intactjointhe volves review of departments; meetings with tion, she also assisted her father at farming in a much scenario of nearly 10 million Of the people Democracy is drivingand the movement for accountability and change rajeevIn bhatt course development set byevery Narendrabhai,” ing theof country’s workforce year. In the ‘common citizens’ on Monday their fields.

1962, she married said 73-year-old who, reasonably along withpaying Amit Tuesday; and departmental heads eventthe of their not finding Mafatbhai Patel and the couple Shah, is often described as Modi’s‘dividend’ “left and onWhile jobs, the promised demographic Wednesday.

In his farewell the breadth of detail and ability to of forced de-leveraging. moved to Ahmedabad four years ‘Policy paralysis’ may right couldarms”. well turn a ‘nightmare’, threatening to weave speechtogether in Ahmedabad, an emodiverse strands of contempo- have also played later. aShe completed a dual Maspart, though I wouldn’t atWhen Anandiben thedemocracy. oath on May 23 as rary overwhelm even its took vibrant tional Modireality praised Indian make“Amitbhai” the book more Anandiben than a tach tersimportance in science and too much to it.

Noreducation is democwas theThese fifteenth chief forebodings minister of Gujarat, she was useful dismal are elegantly for his read, work,where amid ita falls crowd clamshort, though, is in by racy while unless raising ittwois children.

Their to blame, construed as noticed the BJP setting twin as the first captured in precedents the present— book’s title:woman Imploouring for Amit Shah as argument.

CM. A si- when she made offering a cogent central marriage however, did not last too something that limits the ability of the State news CM the author, State and as the mostdeserves educatedtoone. sion.ofThe John Elliott, be lent Anandiben had stood byIndia’s and record Take the contention about of two long. Mafatbhai politically into acquire swathes ofwas land for corpofor saving girls large The retired schoolbeing principal is an MSc, taken seriously, someone whoBEd hasand re- chronic watched.underachievement, Despite reports of rivalry which is ascribed clined initially, but it was Anandirates, imposing projects on unwilling locals from drowning MEd, and gold medallist.

In his address to to ported onaIndia for the Financial Times, The between the two “arms”, an entrenched cultureAnandiof chalta hai (any- or showing ben whoits was groomed a career labour place.

Therefor are many party members, Modi “She is most Economist, Fortune andsaid, New Statesman forsuitaover thing ben’s elevation the post of CM solutions). who would want goes) andtojugaad (quick-fix in politics.

Muchand to even her see embarsuch a State this ble fordecades: the post as be the most educatthree “I she waswill at the opening of the These was inevitable. traits are “so deeply inrassment, even anas key to aMafatbhai revival of had sentiment. ed CM tillfactory date. Even in a conservative society grained into how India’s people (Maruti) in Gurgaon when (Indira) nounced contesting the The country’s chaoticfor democof that time, she the obtained higher education.”

Gandhi released first cars to customers on and Pool to party institutions function that elections on an to AAP ticket; their racy, according journalist and When his whirlwind 14 December 1983”. election campaign began performance Anandiben’s plunge into politics crumbles”.

They was not a children convinced otherwise. authorhim Elliott, creates an enviin You September, Modi left the run- also can, then, expect fromday-to-day him the perplanned one. Into quite a dramatic contribute a tolerance of fashion, she Over nearlyronment three decades, Anandiben “where jugaad fixes has are Democracy has been ning of the in her capable hands. spective of State the dispassionate outsider who venal was noticed by theand BJP in 1987 when she made moved from strength politicians self-servstrength the party. easy, andtowhere theinfailures of the single-largest Even India during Modi’s tenure, shesucceed. held multi- ing knows and also wants it to news for heroically jumping into the Sardar In 1994, she was government officials, and “a a ticket to the Sabthegiven system in terms of Rajya poor govagent for change pleThe keyknowledge portfolios — urban development, that comes from keenlyreveob- lack Sarovar two girls from ha and four years of reservoir interest to in save tackling later, sheweakened successfully conernance and instituin India nue andadisaster Taking a cue problems”. serving country management. where “virtually everything drowning, for which she won a bravery award. tested from tions the make Mandal constituency in the fatalism of chalta from Modi’s cabinet theiscentre andfrom his conand its opposite are at true” evident the At Now, the time, was teaching at Mohinaba Ka- Ahmedabad. hai I findshe this kind of analyIn the 2012 State a welcome safeassembly haven”. Itelecalso trol over ministries, Anandiben, as chief min- sis range of topics covered. nyaquite Vidyalaya in Ahmedabad. superficial at one level.Persuaded to tions, she contested the and Ghatlodia “blocks from changes acts asconan ister, hold 10 portfolios, including Thewill book hasover everything — the impact of join by aand party a strong female stituency andexcuse If jugaad thelooking laidbackfor chalta won with recordismargin.

She for awhat not being the ones she held earlier, andthe all subject mat- hai liberalisation (whose origins author tracvoice, Anandiben quickly and quietly rose is the longest-serving approach are the primary BJP minister in the State. achieved”. ters allotted to‘M’ other ministers.

Seenout as aa causes es tonot an unsigned document setting throughofthe mirroring her mentor’s as- “She theranks, country’s backwardness, what has the farsightedness required for a I would argue the opposite. It is democracy hard taskmaster, her no-nonsense five-year reform roadmap that wasgovernance apparent- explains cent around same time.rates through the that the the high growth leader,” Statethe BJPsingle-largest chief R C Faldu.agent for hassays been style is similar to Modi’s. ly drafted in early-1990

by Montek Singh Ahlu- last Indecade? the initial years, Anandiben name change That period was one made whereaIndian Despite her efficient administrative style, in India.

It helped destroy the back of Long known a Modi loyalist, she was re- entrepreneurs walia, which asthe latter subsequently for herself through organisational were her consumed

by Johnskills.

May- zamindari party workers are yet in to the warm upand to her. feudalism ’60s ’70sWhile , pave warded for herthe allegiance when he picked her confirmed!), unresolved problems of In a newly liberalised India, she was“spontaneentrusted the nard Keynes’ ‘animal spirits’.

Their she way maintains relations with the bureaufor thegood rise of lower castes in national to be hisversus successor, over other strong conten- ous growth environment and land acquisiwithurge the responsibility offrom heading thehai Gujarat to action” — far chalta — led structures cracy, partyofmembers her as arpower insometimes the ’80s andsee ’90s , and is ders as Saurabh Patel and Nitin Patel — them tion such for large projects, dynasty politics, unBJP’s Mahila Morcha.

In December 1991, to expand aggressively and go onduring an in- now rogant andtheunfriendly. driving movements Unsurprisingly, demanding acboth popular leaders of theofinfluential Patel vestment planned development our cities, the height ofbinge insurgency in Kashmir, financed BJP lead- countability significantly Anandiben’s from only our defence “I should be electedis:representatives community. thegraft energy fi- through middle-classSaurabh protestsPatel, against andand gover Murli Manohar announced the ‘Rash- and large-scaleJoshi borrowings. judged notservants. by the smile myisface but jugaad for the public Andon that neither nance minister brushed aside such ernance failures,however, businessman-politician nextriya Yatra’ of from Kanyakumari to nor It is Ekta the chickens this excessive risk-takworkchalta that Ihai! do.” speculation.

“Anandiben, almostpolicies, every week, us, India’s defence and foreign and ing Srinagar.

On January 1992, Joshi hoisted

by Indian Inc that26, have now come homethe to damodaran rutam vora visits a district and stays there and overthe theUS. week- roost. relations with China, Pakistan IndianThe flagcurrent for the first time ever at Lal aChowk. recession is largely result harish

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How to write a protest poem

PAPERWALLAH

UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY

janice pariat

The otherTmen in the Valley

o write a protest poem you must live in times like these.

The season of Light. The season of Darkness.

When our winter of discontent threatens to linger as long as the one coming to Westeros. Our fleeting spring of little hope.

To write a protest poem you must expand — not your possessions nor your waistlines — the infernal ‘I’ into ‘We’. Take note. How Carl Sandburg transforms the masses, the hungry crowd, into a collective individual in I am the People, the Mob. Remember, he said, I, the people, am the audience that witnesses history.

And long before a man named Karl spoke of losing our fetters, Percy B Shelley raised The Masque of Anarchy: “Shake your chains to earth like dew/Which in sleep had fallen on you — /Ye are many — they are few.”

It is not easy.

“The few who dare, must speak and speak again/To right the wrongs of many.” Ella Wheeler Wilcox’s Protest poem is accurate.

It is not difficult.

To write a protest poem you may be moved by spit-fire anger, dull rage, and passionate fury. You must, above all, be touched, always, by empathy.

And, as that Brit spoken-lyric prophet of our times, Scroobius Pip, said, it would help If “Thou shalt think for yourselves” instead.

To write a protest poem you must be willing not to sell. Out. To acknowledge that simply everything is not for sale. That price tags are a little noose.

How would you reply to Nicolas Guillen? The poet who asks in Can You: “Can you sell me the air that passes through your fingers/and hits your face and undoes your hair?/Can you sell me some sky?/Can you sell me a dollar’s worth of water/from the spring, a pregnant cloud?/Can you sell me some land, the deep night/of the roots, the teeth of/dinosaurs and the scattered lime/of distant skeletons?”

Yes, say the MNCs and the PLCs and their paid-up LLCs. To write a protest poem you must end — one thing only — indifference.

To hear ‘the poor-rich gap will widen,’ and widen your eyes and say, ‘Unfortunate reality.’

It’s a reality that does not have to be conceded to.

When you write a protest poem, you may also set it to music. The delicacy of string, the thump of electronica, the triumph of brass, the rhythm of percussion.

The music of your voice is also enough.

A day in the life of... A soldier deployed atWe’d a polling booth Anantnag, several kilometres away from home, perhaps afp/rouf bhat all like toinbe Bob Dylan.

You will also echo Aretha Franklin. Singing for our due regard.

And Sixto Rodriguez, certain “this system’s gonna fall soon, to an angry young here is a small town in thetune.”

Kashmir ing sustenance to grass, a few twisted trees, them in 2005, just after the municipal elecValley, located in the district called and nothing more.jazz-soul Nomadstone, comesaying and go onrevolution tions had taken place after more than two decOr Gil Scott-Heron, in his smug “The will be live.”

Anantnag by some, Islamabad bya protest shortpoem, stockyyou ponies, so the Army’s ades.

Theof patriarch, To write first must repeat, likepresence a mantra, the words activist an old man who moved others. The air is clean and sharp, to ignore. struggle with lesswe ease his old age as his joints stiffAudre Lorde:seems “Thereoverlarge, is no suchimpossible thing as a single-issue because doin not coming fresh off the mountains. There the Sitting at a roadside teabattles: stall, I was ap- ened and protested, was still fiery with pride. liveissingle-issue lives.” Cease to split your perpetual sound of flowing water, proached by areligion soldier as who wanted to know HeTo glanced with good-natured scorn at the solFor small the Muslim.

To discard a label.

(To discard labels.) remember, as streams running to meet a river. On aKday that where I came from.

When I mentioned Delhi, diers grinning shyly, “Do you think that it is Satchidanandan does in Shame that if “the gods crowd your memory” there is was not quite summer and not quite fall, a for where I had driven from, it did not seem to sat- they who keep me safe? No, it is my neighlittle space living-breathing people. shadow of a soldier fell across a wall ofFor a house him.

He asked again,rage.

“ButKnow Cruelty. bours, who know me, who have the Dalit.isfy Burn in Namdeo Dhasal’s that had not been lived in for years. “Release me where are you from?”

The last from my infernal identity/Let me fall in love with these stars.” known me all my life. It is among It was only one of a number of abandoned word lingered, questing. them, and because of them, that For the Woman.

Who must never be this. houses in the town, all huddled together, as if Unsure, but moved by his inI am safe.”

What Sumana Roy decries in Every Girl is Dinner: their closeness to each other could “All make sistence, said, “Gorakhpur,” He myup life, I’ve always Ibeen meat — /goat, sparrow,Travelling poultry;/my tongue eaten raw,was Kashmiri, he belonged. through for their emptiness within. At some point durnaming my father’s city in the He confidently claimed the love like a bull’s;/my fingers giving a vegetable its name;/my body chopped Kashmir, I have beeninto pieces ing the decades of fighting that has for raged in State of Uttar Pradesh.

His sudof his neighbours, Muslims all, temple retail.” approached so many the Valley, the owners of these houses, Hindus den smile his face For the Outsider.

No onetransformed is illegal. At some point in our ancestry, if not rightwho now,approached the Army camp times by shy, all, had fled to a life of unbelonging somewith childlike joy as he declared nervously, if they approached it haven’t we all been immigrants?

Or do you worry homesick about yourmen Neighbours, who because where else. Soldiers lived in a camp toDub his colleagues, “I told you so.” calls “the type you are supposed at to all.fear.

He had some reason to, theythere are what poet Benjamin Zephaniah have told me that among those houses, guarding an emptiness Turning back to me he said, “I, having been elected by them to Black and foreign”? they were from UP, and a temple surrounded by barbed wire, too, am from Uttarby Pradesh, and A Journey — From Cocoon to Butterfly. represent the town. In no elecFor the LGBTQ. We are all lifted Ifti Nasim’s and did I know while the weeds grew and memories died. A we hadWe somebody from Go-are never young or old/We givetion, “Remember we even are gay. are free souls/We birthin India or the wider world, their town?

Kashmiri friend of mine, seeing a photograph rakhpur in our regiment until had to ourselves/We won’t die, we only disappear/And then come back as a dream.” I ever run across this anomaof the place, was stunned into uncharacterislast month.”

He suddenly burst ly of minorities being over-repreThere’s no single-issue struggle.

A cage is a cage from any angle. tic silence. When he spoke, it was with wordsa protest into apoem, spateput of confidences and sented in elections, usually they To write away your pen and ink and paper. Your fancy superfast that caught in his throat, “My closest friend advice on how best to travel, and are under-represented, but in computer. Stop looking at the world on a screen, through window upon window and I played there, by that stream. That is window. his what to say so that Leave I wouldn’t getDo not be silent. Please. the Kashmir Valley Hindus and upon Make a gesture. a mark. house. I don’t know where he is now, where his caught behind the slow-moving Army conSikhs, representing less than a few percent of Instead use Priya Sarukkai Chabria’s Invocation as a call to all things that nurture life. family has gone.” voys.

“Stay with us,” he offered, presenting the the population were elected far beyond their “Spirit of water, give me hope.”

But there is always more to a storyFor than an is where one home he —had, a tent in the mountains, to proportion during that municipal election. if this we are empty house and more to a man than justgods his aresomebody fromshops/the his own land. the old man was right, maybe it was “The in the betting gods are in the cafe/theMaybe gods are smoking uniform. Even a photograph that shows Travelling where gods hun- arelove, of adesks/the sort. I do not know. fagsjust outathe back/the godsthrough are in theKashmir, office blocks/the at their shadow on the wall captures the aching loneliof thousands of and soldiers andless”— paramiliAnd that shadow upon that house was just gods are sickdreds of always giving more getting ness, and a twist of unusual tales. Across the tary personnel are deployed, I have been that, a passing Kate Tempest also reminds us that me, you, and everyone, are the Brand New moment, as the soldier ached Valley, some distance from Anantnag,Ancients. is a tour- approached so many times by shy, homesick for a home he had left, and the house ached for ist resort called Sonamarg where a large gate- you menare who have told me that they were from UP, those that have left it, in a day that was not Remember, mythical. way tells you that the Army welcomes your and did I know their town? quite summer, not quite fall, in a place I have Remember, the protest poem is you. visit. It is a place of glaciers slowly retreating, And in that little town in Anantnag, among as yet to understand. leaving behind stones chewed into rubble abandoned houses, there is one where a janice pariat isthose the author of Boats on Land t@janicepariat t@OmairTAhmad through the centuries. The soil is thin, provid- Hindu family still lived when I went to meet

There is always more to a story than an empty house and more to a man than just his uniform

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manjula padmanabhan

ELSEWHERE

Day in the city Travelling with convicts and strolling in Central Park with friends

M

y seat companion on the bus from Binghamton to New York City whispers, “Half the other passengers are ex-cons!” There’s a big “correction facility” near Binghamton. She told me how to identify recently released prisoners. “They’re starin’ out the windows, they’re jumpin’ off the bus at every stop and they’ve got all their stuff in one big bag.” It’s true. The women sport inch-long nails and flashy clothes. The men are heavily tattooed. I’m dying to turn around and ask questions, but I don’t. Ex-cons, more than the rest of us, need their privacy.

In New York, I get off at Port Authority Bus Terminal in Manhattan and take the subway to Jackson Heights in the East. It’s a multi-ethnic neighbourhood where ladies wearing twinkling n a world of status messages and selfhits the bottle. Ajay himself is torn bedupattas walk alongside ladies in billowing black burkhas. I get ies, everything is open to scrutiny tween guilt, sadness and a desire to be to the apartment building where a dear friend from Mumbai is and censure. In fact, you are expected from a ‘normal’ family. It is the early ’70s visiting her daughter. After a leisurely lunch and tea, I leave at to be reproachful of all aspects of and the massive emigration of middlesix to ride on the Long Island Rail Road, with its double-decker modern-day living — government inefficlass Indians to America is just beginning. carriages and $7 tickets. Forty minutes later I get off at Mineola ciency, fashion faux pas, social bloopers, Other immigrants see the family as a to stay with friends who are long-time US residents, both docpronunciation errors. But even in this source of nationalistic pride. Children tors, both originally from Tamil Nadu. They are wonderful time of compulsive criticism, the eviwho misbehave are brought forth to witSweet 60 Senior citizens are drawn to the hosts. For dinner there’s three kinds of rice, plus sambar, two dence of dysfunction in families — and ness for themselves the unconditional large open spaces and special facilities on veggie curries and curried salmon, with alfalfa-sprout salad let’s concede the fact that all families are love offered by Indian parents. There is aloffer at dedicated housing projects and delicious sour-cream instead of dahi. Yum. for them n sridharan dysfunctional in their so the expected stream of The next day I return to Manhatown unique ways — is wellgodmen and faith healers. tan to meet with a pair of nuclear hidden and never disAnd while Birju lies mute physicists. She’s English, he’s Indian. cussed. If honesty is a through the circus that goes They met and married in Bombay mandatory responsibility on around him, Ajay is conwhen I was a struggling cartoonist of literature, Akhil Sharfounded by the darkness that Ex-cons, more than and they were PhD students. Now ma’s Family Life has to be has gripped his family. He the rest of us, need they live in the UK and Europe, so we considered an important tries to cope as best as he can their privacy rarely meet. We stroll in Central Park contribution. Very rarely — he lionises his brother at talking continuously. Alongside us in contemporary literaschool, inventing stories Pune, Chennai, Hyderabad, Jaim Prakash Gupta didn’t know En- joint managing director of Ashiana Housing. there Bangalore, are break-dance performers, ture has a home been about his bravery, strength The company has projects in Jaipur and La- pur and Goa are among the preferred glish when he went to the US for summer brides in frothing white cities. placed under such a harsh and intelligence. At home, he growing steadily.

When we higher studies in 1970. His univer- vasa as well. “Another project in Bhiwadi will “The lacedemand and vastisfleets of cyclists.

We aplight that its constituents watches his mother’s unfailstarted (in 10-foot-long 2001), the concept was new.

Gupta, whose next who sity in Oklahoma had a tie-up with be ready by October,” says plaud a young Bengali creates bubbles using a Now it have turned out to be ing faith in the prospect that Family is well-known.

It will take a few more years for the residents of Life a local senior living project to target is Chennai. bucket of bubble-mixture and heavy cotton cord, while his merely flawed humans — Birju will magically recover Sharma the market to mature,” says Shashank Parateach theAkhil language.

Gupta not only learnt Enbrother operates an ice-cream cart.

After lunch we visit a wonnot revered fathers and reone day and his father’s lonenjape, MD, Paranjape Schemes glish, hePenguin also saw how the elderly were cared Retirement planning derful show of Paul Gauguin’s wood-cuts, paintings andConstruction. carvFiction spected mothers. ly spiral into alcoholism.

His company has five senior living projects in for at the₹499 centre with special medical, recre- By 2025, there will be around 173the million peo-of Modern ings at Museum Art. Sharma borrows braveWhen Ajay starts reading, it Pune, under ational and other facilities geared to their ple who are over 60 in India, The following day is Tamil New Year, so I go withthe myAthashri Long Is- brand, ly from real life. In the is about Hemingway. In interand six more planned across the needs. Almost 25 years later, when Gupta was more than double the 76 million land friends to the local temple. I am uncomfortable with orga1970s, a year or so after Sharma and his views, Sharma mentions that he threw country. trying to sell his residential project in Bhiwa- today. Like Ashiana, manynised devel-religion, but the temple is veryentire well maintained.

All the family emigrate to the US, his brother, a away 7,000 pages of the book. The prose is In glass the cases. past, Isenior di, on the outskirts of Delhi, he found that opers including Paranjape deities look well-dressed, smiling in their tell my-housing young teen, dives into a swimming pool. sparse, like Hemingway’s, and that makes projects largely came up in tier II most of the buyers were senior citizens who Schemes, LIC Housing Finance self that it’s really only another kind of the Museum, with Faith His head hits the bottom and he lies unthe honesty that Sharma demonstrates and III cities as thesetowere to of Art were drawn to the vast open spaces and affor- and Tata Housing are eager The cost of building instead as its focus.

Afterwards we go downstairs the seen as conscious underwater for three minutes. even more brutal. As a book critic, I have preferred destinations.

But tier I dable pricing on offer. That immediately grab a share of the lucrative a senior residential excellent canteen.

Then it’s Monday and time to leave. On a sinThese three minutes change the lives of many quibbles with the book. The narracities such as Mumbai, Bangaliving brought back memories from his university ₹4,000-crore assisted gle project with special subway fare, I travel right across the city, going West and everyone around him. Birju, as the older tive is slow up until the accident. Little lore and Chennai are now in dedays and he was soon researching the poten- market in India. facilities is higher North, all the way to Riverside, to stay with an art dealer friend brother is called in the book, becomes Ajay’s conversations with god seem forced too, saysand Sridhar.

Key tial for senior housing in India.

“Demand is expected to grow compared to She is mand and her very friendly cat, Blu. chic and blonde her brain-damaged. He is blind and will never and fake. The writing could have been a projects have been launched and five By 2003, his company, Ashiana Housing, significantly over the next regular ones apartment is full of amazements: 10-foot tall Chinese porcelain walk or talk. Sharma tells the story lot less sparse. Sharma starts the story the masks. response will nonbe keenly de-ornate bronze birdcages, African was ready with its first project for senior citi- to 10 years. More real-estate vases, We talk through Ajay, the younger boy, who is the when he is a 40-year-old but does not comwatched, he adds. segzens at Bhiwadi, replete with elderly-friendly velopers will explore this stop!

For two days! helpless witness to how acutely the family plete that cycle and bring us back to that There several features such as grab-bars in bathrooms, anti- ment as part of their larger, Then it’s time for me to leave once more, by are subway andreasons bus. that unravels after the tragedy. age. But as a reader, all I’ll say is that I finare fuelling the demand skid tiles, low-height shelves, ambulance-on- integrated township developEight hours later I’m back in Elsewhere. Five pounds heavier, for asAfter two years in a hospital and a nursished it in four hours straight, without ments. Cities that havetired tradicall and many more. and sleepy, happy to be home. sisted living. “The biggest threat ing home, Ajay’s parents decide to bring putting the book down once. As testa“The response to the project was stupen- tionally been retirement destinations will see in cities is the lack of physical security for the Birju home and look after him themments go, that is a far more compelling reelderly.

Moreover, dueofto reathan other parts of author dous. We hit the high market, selling 630 significantly more projects MANJULA PADMANABHAN, and artist, tells us tales hersocio-cultural parallel life in selves. His mother throws herself into the flection of the book than any other. sons, people don’t want to stay with their seniorUSA, consultant, homes in less than three years, instead of the the country,” says B Sridhar,

marginalien.blogspot.in Elsewhere in this fortnightly series. role of nurse and eternal champion. The targeted four years,” says Ankur Gupta, son of Strategic Consulting (Education, Healthcare daughters. And if children are living abroad, veena venugopal father is overwhelmed, turns inward and parents find it difficult to adjust there,” says the now-deceased Om Prakash Gupta and the and Senior Living) at JLL India.

The slow unravelling

Rarely in contemporary literature has a home been placed under such a harsh light that its constituents have turned out to be merely flawed humans

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Retired smart

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As the 60-plus population surges in India, developers are designing unique spaces catering to the booming demand for assisted living — a lucrative ₹4,000-crore market

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Into the cold The IgluDorf hotel at Rotenboden offers accommodation in traditional igloos

Best moves Sports, shopping and socialising are a favourite with many in the postretirement years

Lay me down on a bed of ice Dr Sheelu Srinivasan, the founder of Dignity Foundation, which has a senior living project in Neral, about 80km from Mumbai.

projects, says Gupta. “But the selling rates are tals business,” says Tara Singh Vachani, CEO of market-driven. It depends on the demand- Antara Senior Living. supply situation,” he adds. So while Ashiana’s Like in most such projects, the apartments projects in Bhiwadi and Lavasa sell at rates here have wheelchair manoeuvrability, sesimilar to those of other housing projects, the nior-friendly furniture, use of large diffused prices in Jaipur are higher because of greater lights rather than point illumination to redemand there. duce the intensity and emergency call but“We sell at market price (without charging tons among other features. walked to the village,they a short minutes from premium) because are 10 made for senior “Seniors prioritise their health and happithe train station. citizens, who have limited money to spend,” ness over other things.

Travel LogAnd we ensure they In the distance, cold and aloof stood seven says Paranjape. get that in our project,” says Vachani. stumpy igloos, squat in the middle of untouGet there ched snow, smugly claiming the surreal landLiving arrangements The wonder years Several trains ply between scape their own.

As theasconcept of senior housing is still taking The need, however, is toand go Zermatt. beyond just the Zurich/Berne Soon with a cup of gluhwein root inafter, India,welcomed there isn’t a one-size-fits-all ap- physical infrastructure, says JLL’s From the Zermatt trainSridhar. station “In(warm bowls of buttery popcorn a proach.wine), The only pre-condition is that atand least dian companies to learnstation a lot from the walk need to Gornergrat cheese warmth began to spread one of platter, the residents in each house should all be developed markets in terms of aservice (50m away) and take train, delivover By the I was led my igloo, any agedme. above 55.time Children cantobuy ery,” onward he says.to Rotenboden (check sbb.ch/enagrees: for timetables and for seresidual doubts I might have had about Igluthe houses for their elderly parents Srinivasan “Housing prices).

Dorf’s ‘cold hospitality’ had long melted away. as well. nior ticket citizens is not just about brickA heavy-duty sleeping bag laytheir on an ice-bed For now, developers follow and-mortar. It is about providing Stay watched over by a fascinating sculpture of Icaindividual models.

Ashiana, for incomprehensive care along with housthe IgluDorf rus on the wall. minimalistic architecture stance, sells theThe house and charges ing.”I stayed So heratteam bringsnear in a music Now, I have Zermatt (from 109residents, euros for aor ar—a amonthly near-exact replica of thefee photos I maintenance from of igloos teacher for interested reclaimed my standard igloo; iglu-dorf.com). had overMedical as a child — was a sourcelife. of I am the pored residents. services are ranges for interesting craft material But they haveto similar great comfort too. to use. Paranjpe charged according for those eager get igloo their creative re-living hotels in Germany and Andorra.

By this apoint, I wasdeposit glad I had clear charges one-time of steered ₹3 juices flowing. college days of the and standard itineraries lakh, thereSwiss is no monthlyoffered by This is completely in tune with the Tip travel agents infee.

India — the trusty triumvirate maintenance Food is charged findings of a study conducted by AZ If staying in an igloo sounds of Mtmeal.

Titlis“We and don’t Interlaken, at Zurich, ₹40 per make and JungResearch Company in early 2013 tame, build one instead! fraujoch, familiar Bollywood fairground, profit onthat services like food. Our which showed thatintroductory more than 75 per IgluDorf offers where manyfoundation a tourist still breaks, unscripted, non-profit takes care of cent workshops of the seniors surveyed wanted (1 hour) and longer, into song. it,” he says. to socialise with others, go sessions clubbing, party, exmore intensive (3-5 IAs spent the Dignity next twoFoundation hours exploring thea vila trust, follows dif- ercise, play sports shop for luxury goods hours)and on request. lage at model. leisureIt—offers taking in the intricate ice ferent membership for a onein their retirement years. sculptures onof the walls Ice Bar the time deposit ₹14 lakh,ofofthe which ₹9.5and lakh is Alka Singh, the 50-year-old principal of handsome adorning ice-seats of refundablefur onrugs expiry of thethe membership.

Smart Kids International School in Jaipur, the nextasdoor.

Powdery “Thesmall trustamphitheatre retains ₹4.5 lakh maintenance swears by senior housing. She lives at the Ashsnow continued to layer ground An inch by moon had bathed entireand snow-covered and sinking fund,” says the Srinivasan. addiiana facility with herthe husband mother-ininch as₹10,000 I made my way toisthe communal din- landscape in works a mellow bluewhile light.her architect tional a month charged for houselaw. Her son in Goa, ner table. security On offerand wasmedical an archetypal Crawling reluctantly into the sleeping bag keeping, facilities,Swiss and daughter lives in Chandigarh. fondue; its rich, builtliving for Arctic ₹6,000 for food. melted cheese a great com- (apparently “I have started my lifeconditions) now. I spentthat the panion up and withit night, I continued to thinkhard about the starWith to age,conversations medical needsstruck increase first five decades working to bring up strangers-turned-friends at IgluDorf. shadowy visions of the helps to live in projects that offer specialised studded childrenskies and and earnthe money.

Now, I have reLater, at dusk, I crept into theand si- Alps.

I wasmy warm minutes, my snugcollege in my healthcare.

“When jointsoutside have problems claimed life.within I am re-living lence andisstared at the setting sun, examining the igloo.

So much I didn’t balance wavering, emergency response and igloo days,”within says Singh.

Each evening, shesolooks forthe snowflakes as they fell my want it the next morning.

Mostor guests careintricate services become important,” sayson Gupta. wardto toleave the musical concerts or games bhagloves.

When the cold right after by breakfast, but I lingered till That also explains whybecame the Maxunbearable, Group decid-I had jansleftorganised the housing society. joined the other guests living huddled in front of theit 11am, makingwe this wonderland ed to enter the senior space.

In 2003, “Sometimes, allwinter just cook and sharemine our fire at the heated Hours beers justAnd a little longer. launched its firstbar. project — passed Antara over Senior Liv- for food. since we have lived a major part of and conversation.

And before it ing cheery — at Purukul, in Dehradun, at anlong, investlife, there are enough tales to share with each munjal is an academic and travel enthusiast who was midnight.

As we stepped outside the bar, savi ment of ₹515 crore. other and while away time,” she says. there wasIndia a collective gasp of disbelief.

A full “Max is well-equipped to take care of blogs at bruisedpassports.com the healthcare needs of seniors with its hospi- rashmi pratap

The price and the promise Steer off beaten inforward the Swiss Alps and into the icy embrace of a friendly igloo village Under assisted living, thetracks elderly look to an environment in which all their needs are met. Sanjeev Sathe, an air-conditioning consultant tothe industries and commercial got off at Rotenboden train stationproin jects,Switzerland, chose a project in LavasaThe for his wife and uncertain. train track him.seemed “I spendtofour to six weekswith withglistening my son in be decorated the US. of all thearound time, I am India. The confacilice,Rest while mein snowflakes ity hastolike-minded people insnow a similar tinued fall silently. There was as farage as bracket,” he says. contrast only to Mumbai, the eye could see —Inbreached by the where Sathe has spent a better part his life, mighty Matterhorn (4,478m) and itsoffamous at thefin. facility have time to socialise shark Once people the train chugged away, pinand silence interactdescended with eachonother.

The pleasant drop this white, Alpine weatherI round the enough year at Lavasa is Ianother expanse. was warm though. knew I majorbe attraction. would spending the night on a bed of ice wonderfor then, andLittle had dressed it. that when Srinivasan launched her project in picturesque in Barely a month ago, dipping into myNeral bucket 2006, the 62 cottages sold within days. list, I had booked an were overnight stay at IgluIt has 100 residents at the moment, and she is Dorf, a unique village that rents traditional readyto tocurious start thesouls nextlike phase. igloos me. I was wildly exCompared regular housing, it costs more cited then, buttosurrounded now by a blanket buildmy a senior residential project speoftosnow, feet slipping deeper andwith deeper cialits facilities large common spaces for into grasp, I and wasn’t so sure this was the big, recreation and services.

“Our— capex life-affirming tickmedical I was after.

Suddenly midfor these projects is about per cent higher,” reverie — two guides from 30 IgluDorf appeared says Paranjape. on skis, as if out of nowhere. Together, we The construction cost of about ₹1,300 per sqft increases by ₹50-100 in senior housing

I Breathe easy Ashiana Housing in Bhiwadi, near Delhi, has grab-bars in bathrooms, anti-skid tiles, low-height Meltingambulance-on-call, moments Bondingand with shelves, other other guests over Swiss fondue facilities geared to the various needs savi munjal of senior citizens

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A BUTTERFLY BREEZE FROM MP

joanna van gruisen

The number game Before you rejoice, note the skewed equation of political will and greenhouse gases in India BJP – 282+ : CO2 – 400+

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s April slips into May, the daytime temperatures in our part of Madhya Pradesh are not very conducive to tourism, so we shut shop and wait for the cooler months. It is however, a glorious arboreal month: the number of trees that are in flower and in the flush of wonderful fresh greens or stunning crimsons of new leaf must be the highest at this time. We delighted in this eye feast as we drove to Delhi early in May. It was marriage season too so we passed an inordinate number of bullock carts, tractortrailers, small trucks and roof-laden buses piled high with dowries (mattresses, furniture, refrigerators, steel cupboards, etc) travelling to homes of the newly marrieds. But even more than this, we shared the road with innumerable trucks weighed down with the recently harvested wheat crop. Many new godowns have sprung up (some still being constructed), and in front of them all were long lines of trucks and trailers waiting to offload their produce. MP is expecting another bumper harvest in spite of unseasonable rain in some areas. It certainly looked that way.

Last year’s procurement of wheat in MP has increased more than tenfold over the last decade. Procurement this year is already up another 25 per cent and it is thought that MP is

Papa di gaddi A neta or babu in a car other than the Ambassador was sure to suffer from an identity crisis afp/douglas e curran

Great expectations Could the celebrations of high agricultural yield in India, and the preparations for such sustained growth over the next few years, be overhasty? reuters

set to surpass even Punjab in wheat produc- our earth’s atmosphere remained over 400 tion: 19 million tonnes is the amount predict- parts per million (ppm) for a full month. CO2, ed — hence the urgency of building more as I hope everyone now knows, is the chief grain storage facilities. However, celebrations greenhouse gas that results from human acof such agricultural success and preparations tivities and is responsible for global warming for a continuing high may be short-lived. and climate change. We first hit this level on Apart from the unsustainable excess of pesti- May 9, 2013 but April 2014 was the first month cides, there is concern as to whether MP — or in human history that it remained above this indeed India as a whole — will be able to up- consistently. To give this some perspective: hold such production over the coming years pre-industrial levels of CO2 were around or decades. The agricultural sector is the most 280ppm. It is of course just a number but clisensitive to climate change and matologists agree that 400 is a wheat is one of the vulnerable ‘historic threshold’ and we have crops. Although admittedly ‘entered a new danger zone’. there is little certainty to the preWhy should this be headline dictions as a number of issues news? Because it will change the It is of course just make for a complex scenario, world as we know it. The upper a number but many scientists are concerned safety limit was pegged at climatologists agree that climate change and our 350ppm. The last time the warming planet will have the ef- that 400ppm of CO2 is earth’s CO2 was below this was ‘historic fect of lowering theinproduction production started the late ’50s, noaone had threshold’ in so thepervasive year 1987.that In spite of all the inequities were for many beand we haveing ‘entered of several that foodthis items, including imagined mascot of Indian industry earth summits andprivilege. internationplump was almost a guilty The a new danger zone’ wheat. drive Whereinto detailed research cul-de-sac. would an evolutionary al protocols, most ample Ambassador seemed to havecountries the wellon wheat hasit been done,new lower For decades, had little to offer. The car fed looks of acontinue rely on andCorpulent burn foscorrupttopolitician. yieldswas supposed are the general our sense and white, it was that to revolutionise sil the fuels and the double increase in mechanical of the conclusion. of time and space turned out to be an example roly-poly, khadi-clad greenhouse continues to neta ingases his conspiratorial of Midst status the quo.election-dominated No wonder then that it became black glasses.accelerate. onedeliberate, of the world’s It was slowAsand like news aoffavourite the last few weeks was abusuch of our calcified best known climatologists, the neta who could not Dr be disturbingand announcement that did not seem James Hansen, reaucracy corrupt politicians. says: or “Ifthe humanity wishes to rushed babu with his red to The get Ambassador the attentionsoiteloquently deserves. Admittedly it preserve a planet exto thattake on which civtapesimilar who would his own does nothow make for sexy headlines but it is an ilisation developed pressed people perceived govto Its which life on poise earth sweet and time. dignified event that affects us all and should give every- is adapted, paleoclimate ernment and how government evidence ongoon the potholed roadsand signified The Ambassador was one pause itself, for thought. needs to be factored ing climate change perceived that it Itbecame the suggest will aloof need someone whothat wasCO2 regally the mechanical into our government vision, agricultural to be reducedfrom only unauthorised symbol of our the Infrom ground (current reality. levels) to most Itsatgrave, double of the rolypolicies, our dian state.

Thedevelopment Ambassador strategies, without our en- 350 ppm.” When you read of melting glaciers bulging exteriors announced poly, khadi-clad neta actually into aergy netaproduction, or a babu inside lost halfjust its about ev- and disappearing arctic iceofshelves, when the authority its esteemed erything.

Once euphoria brand value, whilethe a neta or a babuof victory wheat harvests are no longer butglassdefipassenger.

Withbumper its tinted dissipates a little, letsure us hope that the recent cient, remember in any other car was to plunge these figures and know why. es, curtained windows and spotvictors and newcrisis. rulers of our country will We have already into an identity too many decades: less delayed white colour, it had the open eyes andappealed minds to to thethe meaning of the longer we Thetheir Ambassador postponeof action mitigate mystique sarkaritopower: It this milestone the Indian world just hit. when be- was pre-liberalisation aesthetic this, the more expensive ecologa moving parlour economically, where the high and 2014and ushered a new era forundesirIndia — mighty ingMay plump heavy in was not all that ically and sociologically it will be. Will the new played their secret games. the electoral change isnation likely todependent generate huge able in a starving on push thisgod in?isMy fears Justfor as development the vehicle offactor a Hindu part of transformations. we also entered a new foreign aid. Thin,But emaciated looks and the its are overall that it will not. connotation, the Ambassador too era in April. This was the timetropes — for atofleast weight-loss tamasha are first cultural the was part of the iconography of the corrupt nejoanna van gruisen issmug a wildlife photographer, 800,000, maybe even 15 million years post-liberalisation generation which has (the big- ta.

The self-enclosed, abundance of the conservationist andnew hotelier based near thehis Panna Tiger world was aand bitmore of a different placethem. then!)

— vehicle ger salaries ways to spend The of this god signified occupathat the amount of carbon dioxide (CO2) in Reserve in Madhya Pradesh

The mount of the mai-baap sarkar

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The Ambassador was a perfect symbol of bureaucracy in the pre-liberalised Indian State, where neither speed nor acceleration were desired virtues

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he Ambassador is no more. The car that carried the powerful has drifted quietly down the road. It has been on ventilator for long with recurrent talk of its possible revival. The nation’s ‘official’ car actually died the day a Marutidriving Manmohan Singh became our finance minister and brought to our plodding economy the agility of a hatchback. Decades later, when Hindustan Motors finally decided to consign the Nehruvian relic to the vault of history, the nation witnessed another rite of passage: The swearing-in of the Modi sarkar.

Narendra Modi promises to drive our economy with the brute force of an SUV. Clearly, New India was no country for the old car.

Yet, so central is the Ambassador to our tryst with technology, our bureaucratic inertia, our VIP culture, our licence-permit raj and our venal politics that its history can well be the ghost history of our nation.

The Ambassador wasn’t just another colonial derivative, even though its design was borrowed from the British car Morris Oxford III. It was far sturdier and thus ideal for Indian roads. It was the symbol of India’s industrial and technological self-sufficiency. When its

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Fodder politic

tion of the nation’s resources. Its white opacity and forbidding tinted windows suggested that he had retained something of the unreachable superiority of a royal. The Ambassador was the mount of the mai-baap sarkar.

With a revolving red beacon atop, the Ambassador was a bully on the road. It symbolised the State’s will to dominate the space where it daily engages with its people in most visible and dramatic ways, defying traffic signals and cutting through crowds like a knife. It became MEAL State’s TICKETgesture to its people: the overbearing Get aside. The VIP bully subverted the primary democratic site where the State enforces the law and creates consensus out of chaos.

In the pre-liberalised Indian State, where neither speed was a virtue nor acceleration a

desirable administrative manoeuvre, the Ambassador was a perfect symbol of bureaucracy.

The car was for the slow, deliberative babu for whom being sleek, fast and efficient was rather a mark of desperate inadequacy.

Though it was supposed to be an instrument of mobility, a propeller for the nation’s governing class, the Ambassador was really at the heart of the timeless stasis of pre-liberalised India. It is the new economy that has truly put India on wheels.

After the advent of the Maruti, it continued to be the vehicle of choice for the babu and the neta but it was increasingly becoming a misfit in a culture of speed ushered in by Manmohan Singh, first as a finance minister and later as the prime minister. The light and nimble Ma-

Stew good to be true

Soft power Dhokla’s capital caper nagara gopal

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hat all eyes would be trained on the forecourt of the Rashtrapati Bhavan last week was a given. That all eyes would rest on its overladen tables was not.

Fiercely guarded — almost as fiercely as the list of cabinet ministers — the menu for the swearing-in ceremony (once revealed) was picked at for crucial culinary cues. Was it the benign platter of diversity it ought to have been? Or had the Gujaratis finally given the finger to those that dared call their kadhi sweet? Was the omission of biryani a brazen bazooka to bilateral ties? Or had a certain Ms Omita Paul pulled a shorshe-chingri coup to say, ‘Boss, the boss is in the house’?

Whatever the takeaways may’ve been, it was clear that like the good old Amby, soggy samosas and onion pakoras were retiring at last from public life. Khaman dhokla was king now (although, if Sanjaya Baru is to be believed, it had long infiltrated the PMO’s stolid, diabetic ranks).

History, however, has been unkind to most prime ministers and heads of states. In a capital city where it’s hard to turn a corner without eating (or smelling) butter chicken and kebabs, the latter’s weak digestive systems have rarely allowed for celebratory concessions. Of the last few residents of Raisina Hill, most were unadventurous and vegetarian. KR Narayanan’s cocktail idlis and vadas, for instance, seemed infinitely more glamorBoard and lodging The Ambassador ous couldwhen fit in a compared family and a with family’sKalam’s family curd rice and lunch of fruits. Mrs Patil may sushanta patronobish have added some spice at long last, bringing in mirchi vadas from a shop outside the Bhavan. But she rarely breached the achari fish tikka’s Scoville ratings after the Obamas came and went to town.

And even if one were to discount the severity of mashed raw veggies and urine for the last Gujarati PM, many before and after him have stuck to what the doctor ordered (austerity was once a virtue in politics). From Lal Bahadur Shastri’s one frugal meal a day (he cooked it himself on trips abroad) to the diet of Dianol tablets that kept Narasimha Rao’s sugar levels in check, food was business, never pleasure.

The only exceptions: the Gandhis (known to have meaty, Kashmiri proclivities and a love for salmon sandwiches) and AB Vajpayee, a man with a taste for Scotch, Lucknowi kebabs and Chinese.

Chef Marut Sikka, who was invited to cater at the Agra Summit in 2001 for Vajpayee and Pervez Musharraf, recalls, for instance, that “the only sheet of paper signed that summer was the menu card; a copy of which is still with me”.

soity banerjee

ruti signalled a power shift from the government to the new middle class and the burgeoning private enterprise. Now when Narendra Modi promises a small government and quick, unbridled expansion of the economy, the lumbering Ambassador could hardly have the right of way.

The narrative strands of the India story are coming together in startling ways. The last living relic from the Nehruvian age met its end naintara just days before the 50th death anniversary of maya oberoi India’s first prime minister.

And around the same time, a new order came to power in Delhi. The death of the Ambassador truly marks the passing of an era. dharminder kumar is a freelance journalist in Delhi

Thirty hours after I had first started, the boeuf bourguignon, that sacred cow of French cuisine, a complex stew of beef and Burgundy wine, was finally ready

What kind of car is this?

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rainy spring week in Paris is rooms and wine were all easy to find, but invited to dine, though; I estimated that the perfect time to eat boeuf I had spent a full day looking for pearl on- lunch would be ready at about 3:30pm. bourguignon, but it isn’t the ions, the kind every classic recipe de- Undaunted, I began to brown the beef, best time to shop for it. Trudg- mands. “Des oignons grelots?” I had asked and then strained and simmered the ing home in a May downpour with a kilo everywhere, including two supermar- herb-infused wine, picking scraggly of beef in my handbag, holding an um- kets, a farmers’ market and a conve- thyme branches out of it while saying brella over a paper bag ofease, potatoes nience store, tracking theseac- “Ow!” ineffectually.

Thenspree I browned on- about t was a car that with equal couldand week when this before was due — and down plan trips vided.

After a shopping and vague carrots, two athyme bunches mythicalFan tinybelts white onions the condi- ions garlic, made beef stock igbucket across ploughed fieldbristling with a in- cordingly. went withinmonotonous theand colour of the substitute, sheand, unlocked the to my cheek,farmhands I was ready(and to give up, and I regularity ments aisle Picard, a fronoring that Roux’s instructions dozen swarthy animals) and at I remember with a shudder, a first Ambassador appeared familiar and started zen foods about brandy and a cast-iron on hadn’t board even and not turnyet. a hair, and spill sizzling May chain. afternoon on Delhi’s Ring Road, drove halfway across Bombay (as it was then to the had intimi- whenAt I considered of which I own, the entire Going contents of butcher her sump inbeen the forethehome, fan belt shredded — and the brakes known) topot, her neither next stop.

But then the stolen enough.

My very poshdropping neighbour- went several An inveterdecanted everything into aand recourt ofdating Rashtrapati Bhavan while at therecipes. same time.

You felt as if you were car decided that enough was enough hood butcher, La one Boucherie ate recipe-adapter, I have covered dish, she and tried a off a Head of State.

Every single was cus- Le stepping into a cowpat when you fusedterracotta to start when I have the same Bourdonnec, is collection owned by ofthe very fa- pressed the same attitude to reciputsecond it in thetime. oven. tom built with its own genetic the brake pedal — and the “What kind of car is attitude to recipes mous Yves-Marie We Le had Bourdonnec; as to diets: on I ignore the Two hours is a long time quirks and eccentricities. a string ofthis carpes just surged inexorably, as this?” she fumed before the drivas to diets — I ignore outpost isIrun by one of few women instructions I don’t to wait for lunch.

Interested them: the earliest remember wasthe a dark blue ahead, the steam rose like. and Ihissed er landed up and told her, “But the instructions I’ve early ever met, eliminated parties wandered original,butchers back in the ’60s,Marie-Flore.

MSW 438, (if I from her nobleYves prow.CamdeThe mechanmemsahib thatinisand not out our car!”

I You don’tfelt likeyou were bourguignon, thatfarsacred cow of ic’sborde, because his list ofwhen I of the “just presented to rememberBoeuf rightly), that was by mechanieyes were like grapefruit Newkitchen Ambassadors stepping into a French cuisine, is a complex stew of beef pulled ingredients or-he saw check”, retreating whentoconcally most sound.

She took us up and down into the(chocolate, garage and a host of challenges their drivcowpat on pressing and Burgundy (Bourgogne) wine that zest, nutmeg, ginger) fronted withgears a threatening from Madras to Ooty (as they were then) and us- theange muck spilling like lava out of the ers. The would give you the brake pedal es braising meats like beef cheek or pale- hubcaps was too long.

Child oven mitt. —Meanwhile, never even had a flat, let alone breathlessness and the Julia plume of steam blisters you neededDuto karate ron. Le Bourdonnec was outHer of beef cheek erupting was rejected asking me This casse and Roux instructed while tackling the hairpin bends. succesfrom for the bonnet. chop rather than change them — but Marie-Flore offered the (rather more same to take thehad dishaintrick andgearbox out mein to10 slow-fry theflat. bacon sors were a different breed. beauty — minutes Youfor had to of expensive) from the forequarthe oven manyfrom times.

And Anthony eight minutes, then braise the onions in The The new, excitingbasse-côte, Mark II! that replaced her youofcould onlytoo change second course, drop-kick the clutch. ter.exciting!

“I find it’s betterfuel forpump, boeuf which bourguig- to third Bourdain and Jamiethe Oliver were sauce, the had a new! electric if you knew secret for-disquali- part of the bourguignon steering — like asauté ship’s wheel — nontick-tick-ticking anyway,” she said. fied;which only awas Frenchman wouldthe do.combinaMichel mushrooms, and butter car- a good apart from all“For the slow-cooking, time like a mula, like knowing would give and yourboil shoulders andthe biceps it gives fat and flavour tofuel the nowhere stew.”

Roux Jr’s instructions were precise and all separately. incorporate bomb about to explode pumped tion numbers of a safe. No newcomer could rots, workout.

One car“Then was delivered witheva distinct I try agreeanother with anyone who isholiwield- grind clear, but, feeling perhapsother a halfinto the casserole anddealer let it cook — and made ustoabort motoring away in that car that in anything than erything list to starboard, which the could not ing a big knife, and asked French-half-English chef wasn’t Gallic forsee. a further minutes,” said Ducasse, day — because even the so bigI acquiesced, fancy TVS garage in second gear.

(They or30 the manufacturers saw very little smallwe pieces. cook toonot fast,” But enough, I hedged bets on of Alain man of that's infinite patience.

Maduraifor (where were “They’ll stranded) could my mother did my something thatDukind obviously indeed.)aBut yes, enough dissing; there Marie-Flore But she — she casse, despite the fact that— he defectMy stomach wasn’t going to stand for get theirsaid heads around theominously. problem. Another stole an Ambassador nothad even realis- were plusses too. carved mebreak a big basse-côte, inged back incar2008.

Twofor all this; everything in a pan50 bhp, old faithful would herhunk axle soofregularly, thattosheMonaco had. The regular had gone ThisI just hulksautéed produced only around trimmed away thewe sinew the fat, half-Frenchmen are better as with and took the casserole outfuss of if you every three months, that couldand predict theand repairs and a substitute Ambythan hadnone, been probutbutter had enough torque and didn’t wrapped it up. I put the paper parcel in the saying goes. the notgear. so fast: Roux insisted I irrelesetoven. off inBut third Road surfaces were my handbag to protect it from the rain, Roux is empathic about not marinat- remove and reduce vant, the she liquid, went and overstrain everything.

And yes, I much to her amusement. ing the meat for fear of a it,could whileback simultaneously the and park one reheating with a speed and preBuying the beef turned “gamey taste”, but I like meat onI the stove. manage I did, but I couldn’t cision can never with these new bulout to be the simple marinades, so I turn- bring to strain something twice bousmyself beauties. bit. Herbs, cared to Ducasse in one day,speed? so I just skimmed the fat As for Well, tell me,off which car in the rots, mush(“Don’t choose a from thecan wine, boiled and to of a world give you all thethickened thrills anditchills good wine, because a sauce, poured it over meat and veg- while hysterical Ferrari at the terminal velocity, it’ll reduce so much gies, andjust simmered everything doing 80 kmph?

The heat,together. the jarring, the you won’t taste its Thirty the hours after Ithe had first of started, noise, rattling, smell burning oil, quality”). I poured a lunch was drama ready. Rain sputtered the sheer — it was all theredown — who need2013 Bourgogne outside, but my kitchen was warm and And it seried a shrieking Ferrari costing crores?

Passetoutgrains smelt bread thyme. ously,like fewwine cars and are so easy and to climb into and over my herbs, The boeufout bourguignon perfect: love-service climb of than thewas Amby.

Afterasales wine and diced ly and brown-dark stew,provided flecked with parsley repairs were anywhere and anyonions, and put and thyme and bay leaves, the meat tentime in the country by an army of phantom litit all to bed. der juicy inside, the carrots the tleand boys in flapping shorts whoand miraculously The next pearl onions like the firstyou hints emerged the moment putofupspring the bonnet. morning, I over- among worth Andthe yes,stew, the car had athe soul:three-hour We were driving slept, but I rea- wait.

Andfrom there was just left over home dinner oneenough night, back in the late soned that this to’80s prevent anyone having brave the(softly) in our last Amby andtodiscussing could only be good rain next day. of one of those newfangled thethe acquisition for the marinade. Not naintara Marutis.maya The grey ladyis coasted to abased gentle halt, oberoi a food writer so good for the people in Paris smoke emerging from under the dashboard. t@naintaramaya Right outside the Supreme Court premises, naintara maya oberoi she had attempted self-immolation.

It can give you the thrills of a Ferrari and it can empty its innards in a royal courtyard

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Things fall apart THE COMPASS CHRONICLES

Fish falling from clouds

Expelled from a university in UP, the future of a few Kashmiri students hangs in the balance

rohit gupta

Omens and legends aside, could it have been a surreptitious scientific experiment?

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Bengal, edited by James Prinsep, we find the phenomenon, on a considerable scale, which following account. “The phenomenon of fish happened at the Nokulhatty factory, zillah falling from the sky in the rainy season,” Dacca Jelalpur, in 1830. Mr Cameron, who comwrites Prinsep, “however incredmunicated the fact, took the preible it may appear, has been atcaution of having a regular deposition of the evidence of tested by such circumstantial several natives who had witevidence, that no reasonable doubt can be entertained of the nessed the fall, made in Bengafact. I was as incredulous as my lee, and attested before the The shower of fish neighbours, until I once found a magistrate: the statement is well took place on worthy of preservation in a jourfish, which had apparently been February 19, 1830 nal of science; I therefore make alive when it fell, in the brass no apology for introducing a funnel of my pluviometer at Betranslation at length. The shownares, which stood on an insulated stone pillar, raised five feet er of fish took place on 19 February, 1830, in the neighbourhood above the ground in my garden.”

The pluviometer is a small rain-gauge, of the Surbundy factory, Feridpoor.”

All the nine eyewitnesses listed agree on the which Prinsep would have owned, being a meteorologist of some repute, aside from many date and time (Friday at noon) and on the other scientific pursuits. This note describes types of fishes that fell. One of these was Shekh several other witnesses of fish falling from the Katbuddin, who as he was “coming from the sky, “I have now before me a note of a similar fields, saw a number of fish spread on the bank of a nala. I picked up six of them, viz two very morning, Hasan (name dents at a private university in Noida were al- across boduli, the twocountry, mirgal,some and of two nouchi, besides whom continue to changed) leaves his five-room house legedly forced to shout anti-Pak slogans and face these,problems there wereasmany fish of numerthe other scholarship funds at Badgaon in Srinagar and sets out subsequently beaten up. ous kinds, andentirely they were witnessed by many haven’t been disbursed.

Faced with to find odd jobs. For ₹3,000 a month, persons wholetters were there.

Somecolleges, of thesemany fish Last week, the 67 Kashmiri students return- termination from their he works as a mason, labourer or carpenter. ed to the SVSU campus. According to the vice- have were had fresh, but others without no choice but torotten returnand to the Valley.

Hasan is 27 years old and, for all purposes, the chancellor, Professor Manzoor Ahmed, “major heads. more.”

“See,I Iknow don’tno know what happened exactly head of a family of four brothers, two sisters, a portions of the internal inquiry by the univer- (onSome witnesses were clearly afraid tothem conMarch 2). But I suspect at least two of working mother and an invalid father. He also sity are over.” A separate inquiry is being con- (Kashmiris) sume these supernatural fish. Sree Dipchunwere miscreants,” says Baaji, holds a degree in sociology and a Masters in ducted by the Meerut police, findings of whose dru Bundopadhya, aged 45 years, narrates, “...I Srinagar office was allegedly attacked education, obtained through distance learn- which are not out yet. Meanwhile, the univer- by picked up some of these fish — butelections one named students.

Baaji, who contested as ing at the Indira Gandhi National Open Uni- sity has cancelled the expulsion of 57 Kashmiri an Banchha Ram Chung forbadealso me, blames saying, the ‘Do independent in Srinagar, versity (IGNOU). “I could be a teacher but there students, allowing them to renot touch these fish;and youparties do notfor know what media politicisare no jobs here. So I do mazdoori,” he says. fish they are,ing and the how issue. they have fallen here.’ sume their studies. The remain“The students Despite the boom in higher education insti- ing 10 have been asked to leave.

Listening to him, I threw away allinthe fish,days and would’ve returned three tutions in Jammu & Kashmir, the sector has They will be given migration went away.” Three years later, themedia... zamindars of if it wasn’t for the For all seen a considerable gap between policies and certificates on request and no a village nearthe Allahabad spoke ofI went a storm acother incidents, to the implementation. According to a HRD ministry mention of the incident will be companied a rain of fish, when university and that solved the placed issues The university is not by report, the State has one of the lowest concen- made; 16-year-old Ahmed is one in a pan turned on to theblood. spot.” an island. Violence trations of colleges — 14 per lakh people com- of them. “But we haven’t asked legendsa aside, assuming recentand survey that happensOmens and Citing Meerut melee A scuffle broke out on the Subharti Unipared to the all-India average of 23. With four for a migration certificate. We such a thing did occur it wouldKashmiri have to be shows the—average hasa versity campus in Meerut when Shahid Afridi hit two of his siblings pursuing correspondence want him to continue to study rather strongbecome wind ormore waveirritable to carryand away enarguback-to-back sixes in the final over of the India-Pak Asia courses, Hasan considers his 16-year-old broth- there,” says Hasan. tire shoals of mentative fish into the a large insky. theOrlast two flock decCup semi-final reuters/andrew biraj; (top right) protests er Ahmed (name changed) lucky. As part of the of birds whoades, dropped their says, cargo mid-flight, Baaji “Kashmiri were held in Srinagar in support of the Kashmiri students Prime Minister’s Special Scholarship Scheme, The jury is out upon the hapless natives.

Instead if they were students need to be understood. who were expelled on that count nissar ahmad Ahmed was chosen for an AICTE-approved in- Three months after the incident and two near- There’s thrown afrom earth, ittowards would have required sentiment Pakistan.

Theya stitute outside Kashmir. In 2013, he enrolled at complete inquiries later, the original question are powerful trebuchet — the Romanwho’ve slingemotional.

These arehuge children the Swami Vivekanand Subharti University remains: What happened that night? Accord- grown shot used to hurl rocksofatstrife the enemy. up in inwar an atmosphere and hu(SVSU) in Meerut, Uttar Pradesh, for a BA LLB ing to the video evidence on YouTube of a few man Therights otherviolations, possibilitythey is some prankneed merry counselling.” course. Yet, for three months now, Ahmed and Kashmiri students who spoke out, others had ster sailing highyear above in a hot air balloon, Junaid, a first B Pharma student admits his family have been living under a shadow of taken offence at the pro-Pak cheering and to throwing fish the itvillagers confound nothing.

“Inatcase (causingtodamage to controversy and uncertainty. them. However, the first flight of aI thrashed them. “If the seniors hadn’t inter- property) happened, I’m recorded not saying it did, On March 3, SVSU hit the headlines for ‘ex- vened, we’d have been beaten to death,” said wasn’t European inthere…

India was March 16, a1836 by a even buton even if it did, penalty pelling’ 67 Kashmiri students following a scuf- one of them. They also alleged that a similar should’ve certain D Robertson from Muchikhola, a subbeen enough.”

Some say they’ve fle that broke out on its campus the previous incident had occurred in February — “Jaan leva been urb oftold Calcutta — only a few years the said to avoid speaking to theafter media. night over the India-Pakistan Asia Cup semi-fi- hamla tha” (a near fatal attack) — adding that precipitation of fishes. yet, thissays theory “The university is notAnd an island,” thehas VC nal. During the match, which was playing at a the injured student had to get stitches. some merit. when asked to give his version of the incident.

TV room in one of the 13 hostels on campus, know the Montgolfier While the VC denies any knowledge of it, Ra- “ItWe is inallthe city. that Violence happens.” Sobrothers will the passions were running high and students bia Altaf, who runs an NGO, All India Centre for university had made the first manned flight in France as help the 10 students find placewere cheering fervently for both sides. Things Urban and Rural Development (AICURD) in ment early elsewhere? as 1783, after ballooning had “We which have nothing to do with came to a head when the Kashmiri students Srinagar, says there have been at least five oth- that,” quickly thewe subject of a has scientific hebecome says. When ask if SVSU taken rooting for Pakistan were accused of being er incidents in the last two years at SVSU. “One or arms betweentaking England and France. is race considering action againstTheir the ‘anti-national’. The next day, they were booked or two of them were serious in nature but I non-Kashmiri scientists werestudents convinced, writes Amitabha present at the time, he under section 124A (sedition; withdrawn lat- won’t reveal anything about them,” says Rabia says, Ghosh, “of the research value of balloons in “They weren’t involved.

There was no er), 153A (promoting enmity between groups) Baaji, as she is fondly called. Since 2012, her or- confrontation. many disciplines likewhy meteorological, astronThen will we take action?” and 427 (mischief) of IPC. They were slapped ganisation has been instrumental in sending omical and topographical observations, deter“My brother didn’t do anything, he doesn’t with a fine of ₹5,000 and asked to leave the hundreds of economically backward Kashmi- even mination of cricket,” the limits of Hasan. respirability, speed watch says Admissions campus for three days. Three days turned into ri students through the Prime Minister’s for of sound, and the velocity falling in the scholarship schemeofare overbodies

by Januthree months, thanks to a heated election Scholarship Scheme, including the 67 stu- ary. the rarefied “If they atmosphere.” let him go now, Ahmed will lose campaign in a communally sensitive State. dents at SVSU. Each year, under the ₹1,200- not one, but two years. Where will he go?”

In May, a hostel in Greater Noida reported a crore scheme that got off to a shaky start in rohit gupta explores the history of science as Ready for launch The first manned hot air balloon, designed by theincident, Montgolfier took off from Paris, on November 21, 1783 wikicommons t@fadesingh priyanka kotamraju similar inbrothers, which three Kashmiri stu2011, about 5,000 Kashmiri students are sent Compasswallah here is an urban legend about Bombay’s most well-known seafood delicacy, the Bombay duck — actually a type of lizardfish, scientifically termed the harpodon nehereus. Murali Ranganathan’s recent translation of an 1863 biography of the city by Marathi writer Govind Narayan relates the myth thus, “When Lord Rama was building a bridge across the sea to get to Lanka, all the fish except the bombil helped him. This enraged Lord Rama who twisted it in his hands and tossed it away. It fell in the Mumbai Bay. From that time on, its bones have been crushed and it has become soft. Devoid of a backbone, it is as soft as cotton when fresh.” Narayan attributes the story to local sheikh chillis (tellers of tall tales). One wonders exactly when the fish thrown by Rama’s own hand finally landed in the waters of the bay, and as it fell did someone notice the boneless projectile descend from the sky?

In an early journal of The Asiatic Society of

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saturday, may 31,31, 2014 saturday, may 2014

Trainspotting

Reducing deficit, What’s at steak?

Italian-style

Kolkata has never had a beef with the Filet Mignon. But is that likely to change now?

For a healthy GDP, the In a goof-up of extra-large proporgovernment includes illicit tions, France buys trains too big businesses for its platforms

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ne would think that before placing an order worth 15 billion euros on anything, let alone 2,000 trains, you would get all the technicalities straight. But not in France, it seems. Even as the country decides whether to sell its own train-maker, Alstom, to the Germans or the Americans, it has also ended up placing an order for trains that won’t fit its platforms. As the ‘absurd comic drama’ unravelled, it was revealed that the mix-up had occurred because France’s train operator took measurements for the new stations and forgot about the older ones dotting the countryside. This costly mistake is going to cost the French government an additional 50 million euros to widen 1,300 platforms. One in six regional stations is said to be affected.

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taly’s young prime minister Matteo Renzi is devising new and certainly alarming strategies to take his country out of the rut. When the country’s gross domestic product (GDP) is calculated this year, revenues from drugs, prostitution and smuggling will be included in the datasets as well. The 39-year-old PM is trying to bring his country’s deficit down and believes including the output from the underground economy will help him in doing this. The Italians, who have been reeling under a recession for over a decade now, will surely try anything to get their nation back on track.

No zombie zone

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The Pentagon is known for its security measures, but abut detailed plan fordecision as businessI would refer to the grew up in a strictly vegetarian household and until the age of 17, I had only al- minded. Roughly 80 per cent of our clientele a zombie attack? lowed myself the transgression of eggs is non-Muslim, so why take a chance?”

shutterstock

seems, is serious about the promise it made in its manifesto. It plans to do everything in its power to protect the cow and its progeny.

While a restaurant or two have bravely tak- Since the International Society for Krishna in my birthday cake. I vividly remember my first chicken sandwich. My toes had curled en that chance, none seem to have taken the Consciousness (ISKCON) already has experimong their list of defence preparations for with pleasure, and I was desperate to take this same kind of risk as Rubi’s Grill. Made to re- ence in the matter of bovine protection, I any situation, the US army has also included a seductively guilty relationship to the next lev- semble a classic American diner, the three- choose to seek an appointment with Radharastrategy in the event of a Zombie apocalypse. Reel. Sitting in a posh restaurant a month later, I year-old establishment offers variations of the man Das, general manager of the spiritual sovealed by the magazine Foreign Policy, the unclassifelt it was finally time for a juicy steak. Placing beef steak, shepherd’s pies and an assortment ciety’s Kolkata chapter. fied document titled Conop 8888, details a my order, I stuttered, “Um, a fi-ley min-yon for of beef burgers. Proprietor Manish Das says Dressed in his all-white attire, the monk complete zombie survival plan. Apart from deme, thanks.” But then the steward bowled me that it took him all of two years first hands me three pockettails on how to isolate the zombies from the a googly. “Sir, would that be rare, medium, to realise that there would be a books — Cows are Cool: Love ’Em, non-bitten ones, the survival guide also has dewell done?” Convinced that he was asking me demand for beef if he added it Capital Communism & Cowism tails on chicken zombies, vegetarian zombies to pay a prior compliment to the chef, I said, to his menu. “I felt there was a and Let’s be Friends: A Curious, and evil magic zombies to name a few and, of “Well done, of course.” I saw him screw up his mindset which defined us as a Calm Cow. While the books teach course, information on how to blow the livnose. I didn’t know my beef then. With time, people who didn’t eat beef. ToI’m sure you’ve heard you cow-whispering techniques ing, or should we say, not-so-living daylights though, that has changed. The Filet Mignon day, I can say that the amount of and popularise forums such as of mad cow disease. out of them. has made sure of it. beef we use in a week equals the MooTube, they also speak of the That, you can say, is Like all forbidden fruits, it must be said, it amount of fish we need in a cow’s importance in a low-enerdivine retribution can sometimes be hard for a beef-eater in Kol- month.” Despite his trade, howgy future. Das explains ISKCON’s kata to find his or her fill. Banned in a majority ever, 29-year-old Das admits he philosophy. “A cow eats grass, of homes, it is also missing from the tables of isn’t allowed to take beef home. which is largely insignificant and most restaurants in the city. Even an eatery costs nothing. She then gives us he Jhingan household is a like Shiraz, famed for its biryani and kebabs, milk, which is considered to be peculiar exception. Even though beef was amrit (nectar).” Insisting that there is a shortadheres to a strict no-pork-no-beef policy.

When asked if the omission of beef helps always cooked in their kitchen, 33-year-old age of milk in India, Das argues, “Unless we Holier than cow At a protest in the Capital demanding a ban on the slaughter make the restaurant’s menu secular, co-owner Bhavna’s father had forbidden her from eat- can give all our children milk, there should be of cows afp/raveendran Atiqur Rahman says, “You could call it secular, ing it until she was 18. It was a choice, he felt, no reason for a slaughterhouse to exist.” Listshe should make as an adult. In the end, the ing the benefits of cow urine and cow manure, eople say strange things at art sight of roast beef and beef vindaloo proved to Das then barrels on about how nature has its shows, but nothing beats this be enough of a catalyst. “I obviously suc- own way of punishing cow slaughter. “I am story. Alexander Selvik Wengcumbed.” For many friends who aren’t al- sure you have heard of mad cow disease. That, what if 20 States in the DC, where the Federal Bureau shoels, a 25-year-old Norwegian lowed beef at home, oher mother’s steaks andUS and you Washington can say, is divine retribution.” of Investigations is headquartered, have made medical marijuana legal? artist, said he ate his own hip, and curries have been frequent requests. Only too Feeling inexplicably chastised, I make my if the most stoner andshop potheads that too made a proper meal of it, happy to comply, And Bellawhat Jhingan does havepopular but way to amovies butcher’s in thethemselves city’s Beck are Bafromquality the US?ofInour a problem of paradoxes, FBI isQureshi finding it hard to hire with potatoes and wine. He made one complaint: “The beef has gan area.the Pyaru has spent his talententire ed ahackers don’texportsmoke thelife ‘good stuff’. this revelation while speaking durgone down because lot of itwho is being selling beef. “There is one thing you must Since the Chinese hacker onslaught on thehe agency and other government ing his graduation show at the ed. I often need to inform my vendor a few understand,” says while trying to console FBI“There is looking to rope in athe large of Tromso Academy of Contempodays in advance.” websites earlier this month, the me. is a reason why beefnumber trade will hackers for its cyber an unprecedented hiring drive, the rary Art in Norway last week. What Surprisingly, it is the Bharatiya Janatacrimes Party division. not go In anywhere.

People of all religions sell it agency set to take in more 150people new recruits to beef upeat theit.cyber was his exhibit, you ask? Well, (BJP) that might have anisanswer to Mrs Jhin- than and of all religions They crimes might division. hiring drive, FBI director Comey told what else but the hip bone and a gan’s woes. Appalled by theJust factbefore that byaselling not confess to it, James but I sell morereportedly than two cows an audience, “I have to hire a great workforce to compete with cyber criminals, film of the hip replacement surbeef to countries such as Malaysia, Thailand, or bulls every day. I am telling you, it’s true.” and some of fast those kids want weed even on the way the interview.” gery he had — Wengshoels was Vietnam and Egypt, India was earning the to smoke My spirits slightly lifted, I asktohim which aniHe added, “Thebeef agency is grappling with this question right now and should born with a deformed hip. Apparently, eating his hip, which he says tastes like “wild sheep”, position of the world’s largest exporter, mal ranks as his favourite.

“The cow, undoubtwith a solution soon ”.edly. Gold will be gold. Always.” brought on a catharsis for the artist, who has suffered severe pain since his childhood on account BJP leader Satpalcome Malikuphad declared a few of the deformity. days before May 16, “If elected, we will crack down on beef exports.” The saffron party, it shreevatsa nevatia is a Kolkata-based writer

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A different kind of hipster

A Norwegian man eats his own hip, apparently “on a whim”

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Ganja dilemma

Find me a hacker who doesn’t smoke pot — the FBI

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cornerstone in-faq by joy bhattacharjya Tough guys

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t’s Clint Eastwood’s birthday today, and time for a quiz on tough guys. Enough said!

The citizens of the city state of Sparta were definitely the original tough guys. Babies were bathed in wine rather than water immediately after birth, and puny or deformed babies were routinely thrown into a chasm on Mount Taygetos. The word ‘spartan’ is obviously in the English dictionary, but which other trait, associated with tough guys originated from the region in which Sparta was located?

2

Bruce Lee was another extremely tough cookie. In which of his action-packed films is he seen sparring with the seven-foot-two-inch basketball star Kareem Abdul Jabbar in a memorable sequence?

3

Indian tough guys. Who dubbed for the Hindi version of Riddick, when the Vin Diesel film released in India in 2013? (2.5 points if you get this right)

4

He served in the US Air Force before starting his own martial arts school called Chun Kuk Do. If he was reasonably well known before, he really came into international attention in 2005, when he was a sprightly 65-year-old. Who am I talking about?

5

Easy one. Who holds the Guinness World record for ‘stunts by a living actor.’ No insurance company underwrites this star’s film productions as he chooses to do all his own stunts? He has fractured his skull, fingers, toes, neck, ankle and both cheekbones while shooting for his films

6

Which current screen ‘tough guy’ represented Britain in international diving for over a decade, finishing 12th in the 1992 World Championship?

7

A connected question. This professional footballer, who represented Leeds, Chelsea and Wimbledon, was renowned for his hard tackling and reckless play. Former French star Ginola once famously said of him that nobody deserved to be a star and make videos by just kicking other players. Identify this tough guy who also drifted into a film career

8 9

Which fictional tough guy, since 1936, has been traditionally opposed by the current leader of the villainous Singh brotherhood?

Which Bond film villain served in the British Intelligence corps in World War II and was attached to the Special Air Service where he took part in numerous special operations?

10

Indian’s will remember Kumble’s amazing bowling effort with a broken jaw in the Antigua test in 2002. But which South African batsman batted with a broken hand in a 2009 test match against Australia in an attempt to draw the game? Sadly, he fell and Australia won with ten balls to spare.

Answers 1. Laconic, from the region of Laconia 2. Game of Death 3. The star with dhai-kilo-ka-haath, Sunny Deol 4. Carlos Ray ‘Chuck’ Norris. His favourite meme is that they wanted to add his face to Mount Rushmore, but the granite is not hard enough for his beard.

5. Jackie Chan 6. Jason Statham 7. Vinnie Jones, in films like Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch. Interestingly, he was childhood friends with Jason Statham.

8. Lee Falk’s creation, Phantom. Other notable enemies include the mercenary Gold Hand and evil president Lubanga.

9. Actor Christopher Lee in The Man with the Golden Gun. 10. Graeme Smith

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joy bhattacharjya is a quizmaster, director Kolkata Knight Riders and author of Junior Premier League — The First XI t@joybhattacharj

the new york times crossword — 0413 1

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A R O O N M A N D A I N E D R S C I S M B A L I L M O N D U B B E R T O Y O S A L L B D E I O E N T E N R E A D Y O S T T S C A I D O N C O U N T B A T H I N R E T E A M

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1 Improvisational music 4 Brick color 10 Bibliographical abbr.

14 Indigenous people known for their tattoos 19 NPR journalist Shapiro 20 1986 girl’s-name song by Boston 21 “Catch-22” profiteer Minderbinder 22 DuPont trademark of 1941 23 Clumsy pharmacist, at times?

26 Easily misled 27 String section members 28 Dressage rider, at times?

30 Smidgen 31 Suffix with social 34 ___ suit 35 Maintain 36 Grant for a filmmaker?

38 Indonesian tourist haven 39 London ___ (British Ferris wheel) 40 Reminiscent of 41 Tucked away 42 Supplies for Hershey’s 44 Overzealous sorts 47 Old-fashioned barber, at

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times?

49 Missile launched at Goliath 51 National Book Mo. 53 Circus performer Kelly 54 Inexperienced shucker, at times?

58 Low pair 60 Out of fashion 61 Subject of a van Gogh series 62 Software user’s shortcut 65 No-limit Texas hold’em player, at times?

69 People may be down on them 70 TWA competitor 71 Dual-sport athlete Sanders 72 Answers that may anger 74 Farmer, at times?

78 Unfettered 82 Knowledge 83 “Shall we proceed?”

84 Sleeping sunbather, at times?

87 Buyer’s final figure 90 Spirits in Scandinavia 91 New Haven alum 92 Breaks down 93 Stanford rival, informally

95 Job everyone wants 96 Sound at a horror film 97 Florentine dynasty name 100 “Cut that out!”

101 West African vegetable 102 Double-handed cooking vessel 103 Dieter, at times?

106 Fall stopper 109 French : merci :: German : ___ 110 Person getting out of a tub, at times?

114 Transpire 115 Memo opener 116 Detestable 117 Something that may be amalgamated 118 Manual parts?

119 Giants or Titans 120 Porcelain purchase, perhaps 121 As matters stand

DOWN 1 Entrance side

2 Department 3 Current location?

4 Brought to tears, possibly 5 “Time’s Arrow” novelist Martin 6 Took off

7 Wedded 8 Unconventional 9 Person moving against traffic?

10 Bring on 11 Go quietly 12 Fully attentive 13 Some hand-me-downs?

14 Snowboard relative 15 Polluted Asian lake 16 Peridot color 17 Vehicle on Mars 18 Lifeless 24 “Goodness me!”

25 Exudes 29 Less humble 31 One of four in “As I Was Going to St. Ives” 32 Problematic roomie 33 Sal of “Rebel Without a Cause” 36 Lunch spot 37 Thing that might decay 38 Bearded comic strip bully 40 Old cavalrymen 42 Illustrations, e.g.

43 In need of spicing up, say 44 -- --- .-. ... .

45 News analyst Roberts 46 Word on a clapperboard

48 Like some measuring units 49 Right away 50 It’s got problems 52 Valéry’s “very” 55 Disburse 56 Goes to court?

57 Offensive line striker 59 Melancholy 62 Flood residue 63 Ghostly 64 “The Ipcress File” star, 1965 66 “___ c’estmoi” 67 Told stories 68 Way too thin 73 Not a single thing?

75 Blue 76 Diminish 77 Opposite of smooth 79 Take by surprise 80 Mud ___ (bottomdwelling fish) 81 Total bore 85 Slurpee flavor 86 Supermodel Heidi

88 Dress in fancy duds 89 Long-eared dogs, informally 90 Reshape 93 Fuerza Democrática Nicaragüense member 94 It’s played in ballparks 96 Viscous substance 97 PC platform of old 98 Ratify 99 The Harlem Shake or the Dougie 100 One of the Allman Brothers 102 Flick site?

104 Expiration notice 105 Fundamental part 106 Modelist’s need 107 Julio-Claudian dynasty ruler 108 Attracted 111 Horatian ___ 112 Hamm of soccer 113 Signal: replaced “CQD”

Patrick Berry/Edited

by Will Shortz

Reach us at blink@thehindu.co.in. Follow us on t @Ink_BL and facebook.com/hbl.blink or thehindubusinessline.com/features/blink