David Magazine v8-i06 | Sending You LOVE

V8-06 02.07.24

Addicted to Fashion: Paired Up

Axel Edelman Figuring Himself OUT

Break Free and Find a New You

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Figuring Himself Out, One Joke at a Time

By Chris Azzopardi Photos: Jenny Anderson

Comedian Alex Edelman is experiencing lots of firsts. Just because something existed doesn’t mean that it’s For Edelman, many of those firsts, including questions worthy. So, any line is a candidate for replacement if that challenge him to reflect on his sexuality, are being it all of a sudden stops working or the cultural context lived out in public, even in interviews such as this one. around it changes. So, things like that have happened to various jokes in the show, and they’ve fallen away First there was his debut stand-up comedy show, or come in.

“Millennial,” winner of the Edinburgh Comedy Award for Best Newcomer at the 2014 Edinburgh Festival I wondered about how the material has evolved with Fringe, making him, yes, the first American to do so personal and world events. As someone who has not since Arj Barker won in 1997. Another first — covertly seen the show, I can only base what I know on the attending a meeting of White Nationalists amid anti- show on lots of acknowledgement and reviews in Semitic rhetoric pointed in his direction online — would major publications like The New Yorker. later become part of his “Just for Us” show, which gave him his first Broadway run when it launched at the Reviews have thankfully, I think, driven people to the Hudson Theatre in the summer of 2023. show in a huge way. And, also Sarah Jessica Parker.

He then got his first review in the New Yorker when the When Sarah Jessica Parker put it on her ’gram, that sold show first hit the stage off-Broadway, at SoHo Playhouse out our entire New York run. She’s amazing. Talk about in New York. “Uproarious! Among Edelman’s many divas that I owe. strengths as a writer and performer is an exceptional eye for the absurd,” Rollo Romig wrote. The show ran Sarah and Mariah. internationally in London and Melbourne, and is now touring the U.S. SJP and Mariah. Are you kidding? Mariah was like, “I’m going to come.” And I was like, “You’re not going to The “firsts” also extend to an appearance in late 2023 come. I would die if you did.” All my comedy heroes on “Jimmy Kimmel Live!,” where he met, for the first have come to see it. Seinfeld came to see it and fucking time, one of his favorites: Mariah Carey. On camera for Steve Martin and Billy Crystal. Billy Crystal’s huge for our interview, Edelman holds up his phone to show me me. a text from his mom with a screenshot and this caption: “Your GF in People Magazine.” I asked him if he saw When it comes to the show’s material, how have your her in concert during her holiday run of shows, and I experiences, even just sharing your life as a Jewish can’t tell if he’s serious, but he joke-whispers to me on person, feel for you now during what’s happening in camera that, “We looked into canceling a show to go the Middle East with the Israeli-Palestinian war? see Mariah.”

Then there’s his Queerty debut; without knowing it until I think it’s become more visceral for me. There’s a this interview, he first made it onto the queer media question at the center of the show, which is, what is our site in June 2023, Pride month, with the headline, place in the world? And I think an invitation to consider “Will Broadway’s Alex Edelman be our new straight that in a way that is 90 minutes of jokes, is actually a (bi?) BFF?” Edelman tells me he is very connected to really interesting and unique way to envision it. queerness through close, loving connections he has in the community, even if he’s still figuring out where he Look, when I was in college, one of the theories of might fit into that community. postmodern literature, which I studied, was the idea that you stand a much better chance of getting your As someone who didn’t even envision “Just For Us” arms around big concepts by viewing them in your on Broadway, what has it been like for you to see the peripheral vision or through the prism of something show evolve from small venues to Broadway and now else. So, the questions of Jewish identity and what does a national tour? it mean to be Jewish? I’m grateful that I’m doing a show Magical. Halcyon. that’s about assimilation, or about people’s place in the Unbelievable. Heartbreaking. Bewildering. Fulfilling. world.

An escape. Such a textured set of emotions, and also to have to constantly re-engage with the material Because the show has had a lot of relevance for people in different contexts is really interesting as a craft who are not just Jews. It’s found purchase with queer challenge, and an emotional one. But, yeah. It’s been people and Muslim people and even a guy who told really, really special. It’s been the most gorgeous me he was from a family of musicians and always experience. It’s really something. wondered if it should mean more. And I’ve had lots of people, Jews and non Jews, come up to me to tell Considering the comedic nature of the material, I’m me that the show has been an escape for them in L.A. struck by the word “heartbreaking.” here, and in San Francisco, where I did it for a while. So, look, I’ve changed some things in the show. I open with We lost our director [Adam Brace, who died in May]. a joke that addresses it, but I think the show’s been My best friend, who I did the work with. So, on one an escape. But comedy is a great way to Trojan horse hand, to use a horrific, horrific cliche, my community things. Sugar makes the medicine go down. And I think has really rallied around me. And, on the other hand, that the show has had that effect on people, thank god. he’s missing all of it. Adam’s missing all of this. The I’m really thrilled by that. show has been, thank god, rapturously received and people seem to enjoy it, and I love doing it. But part of You mentioned recognizing that you have a bigger the reason I love doing it is because it makes me feel queer audience now. I mean, Thanksgiving wasn’t all close to my dead friend. Not to be too direct, but I’ve that long ago, so you technically just came out all over had two coffees today already. So, I’m very spicy. again. Congratulations!

[Laughs.] So, if you’re watching or listening or reading Every time you get on stage, I imagine, you can’t not and you don’t know, I did this joke in 2015 on television think about him. in Australia about how I have a homophobic uncle.

And so, I come out of the closet on Thanksgiving, every It’s the 10 minutes before the show actually, and then Thanksgiving. It’s like a description of doing it one year, the two or three minutes afterwards. Ten minutes which was 2014, 2013 maybe? I can’t remember. And before the show, my crew and I sit down and talk about the joke’s gone viral a bunch of times. When it started, what they think I should be doing differently on stage. everyone felt like the discourse was a lot of straight And, we set five goals for the show. We’ve done that for people going, “This is offensive.” And a lot of queer hundreds of performances. people being like, “This is awesome.”

Comedy for me is about details and making sure that all the details are very looked after. I don’t take a And now, I reposted it the other day, because it was single line for granted. There’s no word out of place, Thanksgiving, just to see what it would be like. Not a nothing stays there just because it was there before. single negative comment. I was thinking about that.

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people I met through Benj, prompted a methodology of self-interrogation for me.

I feel like what you’re asking me is if what you’re saying is OK? I’m not asking you. I’m asking the most unkind people who might be viewing this or reading this and being like, “That’s not fair.” I’m not being like, “I’m friends with Jake Cohen, so I can speak with impunity about the way queer people move in the world,” as someone who is very close to the vest about their own queerness.

As someone who’s a rising comedian, is how open I was like, “I wonder if we’ve gotten more nuanced you are about your life something you have to take in in our understanding of how jokes work, or if we’ve consideration now? gotten more nuanced in our understanding of how queer experiences work?” It’s really interesting I don’t know that I’ve ever talked about this in an watching people’s response to the jokes. Jokes can be interview, but I feel a tremendous need for privacy such good bellwethers or such good weather vanes around aspects of my process. And I feel a tremendous for how people feel about certain social issues and need for privacy around how I feel about other our discourse and how we talk to each other. And no comedians. And I feel a tremendous need for privacy one has ever in person said to me that that joke has about certain ... I don’t know. I guess, some topical offended them. I have had a couple of people come up things feel really private to me, even if they’re not the to me to tell me that that joke made them come out to spiciest topics. their families.

Other topics that are spicy, I don’t feel the need to be To me, the point of that joke was that whether you’re private about at all. I feel like I have a very heterodox just an ally or not, it’s important to have those hard understanding of what I do and don’t need privacy for. conversations with people around you who you think And I like that. But, even recently, just talking about my identity as a Jew, that’s new to me. And even talking may be homophobic. at all about my sex life, that’s new to me. And talking There was a line in the joke that I was always very about all of this is very, very new. proud of, which is, “They say coming out is the hardest thing a young person can do. And it is, but it gets easier These are good questions, just given that they’re not every single year.” That’s not mocking the idea of young the same questions, which is like, “What was it like people coming out. It’s very hard. There’s something walking into that room?” And I’m like, “Well, I did a special about making a point that everyone can laugh 90-minute show about it that you can see.” at, even though it’s a divisive point.

Once you are written about in Queerty, I feel like there I have my own sexuality and my own journey around is automatically some public interest in your sexual my own sexual identity is something that I hold very identity. closely to my chest and I’m very private about. And for reasons I don’t completely understand, but sometimes Have I been written about in Queerty? get into in my art. But queer people and trans people are huge, enormous parts of my life. My partners, my Yes. closest friends, family members. It’s a really, really Oh my god. Wow! Don’t think I’m not looking that up special thing to me. as soon as I get off.

Is it easier to talk about that aspect of your life through your work?

Yes. I have a joke in the show where I go, “If I was raised secular, I think I’d consider myself bisexual, but, because I was religious, I consider myself straight with some secrets.” And one of the few knocks on the show said, “I wish that the show had talked more about that.” The funny thing is, when I wrote the line, that was exactly how comfortable I was talking about it publicly. But I have lots of deep, deep conversations with queer people, particularly queer Jews in my life about sexuality in that intersection.

When did you write that joke?

2021. A couple of years ago.

You have acknowledged that perhaps if you weren’t religious and you didn’t grow up in Boston and lived in New York or maybe even West Hollywood that your Chris Azzopardi is the Editorial Director of Pride Source experience with your own sexual identity might be Media Group and Q Syndicate, the national LGBTQ+ wire service. He has interviewed a multitude of much different. superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey Yeah. I think that’s 1,000% true. But the people that and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New I spend time with and draw wisdom from are people York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via like Benj Pasek, an incredible songwriter, and Aluk, one Twitter @chrisazzopardi. of the great comics. And they’re queer as well. I’m not just listing my queer friends; I’m talking about people for whom their queerness is an animating force and who think as deeply about their queerness as anyone thinks about a vector of their identity. Watching people go through that journey of interrogation, in particular

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Breaking Free Changed Everything

By Sarah Bricker Hunt Photos courtesy of Cory Allen

Growing up, Cory Allen found inspiration for what his adult life For a long time, Allen dated women. “I was 26 or 27 before I had would become in an unexpected place: the police officers who my first experience with a man,” he says. “But… it was the light frequently visited his childhood home in rural Pennsylvania to bulb: ‘This is what it should be and this is what feels normal and resolve domestic disputes between his mother and stepfather. natural.’” Like so many LGBTQ+ people before him, once he began “Due to the frequent interactions with the sheriff’s office, I grew living life in a more honest, authentic way, there was no going back. to admire what they did, and I realized that I wanted to make a difference for victims like they did for us,” he recalls in his anew In “Breaking Free,” Allen details several times when he has been memoir, “Breaking Free: A Saga of Self-Discovery,” available now. discriminated against. For example, in the Secret Service, he was assigned to the airport squad outside the main office and other Allen’s career in law enforcement and the Air Force would agents because the supervisor “didn’t want that faggot” in the eventually lead him to a Secret Service detail protecting Michelle office. Later, when he became the first Secret Service agent to Obama for two years starting in 2016. In the book, Allen focuses demand benefits for his then-husband after the 2013 Supreme on his path from a sometimes tumultuous childhood to his early Court ruling overturning the federal benefits section of Defense of experiences in law enforcement, when he kept his homosexuality Marriage Act (DOMA), he got pushback. “We don’t have a policy hidden while in the Secret Service, which he described to BTL as a for that,” he was told. Microaggressions were a daily occurrence at times, and the pressure and intense feelings of shame could have “front seat to history” in a recent interview. easily led Allen to retreat from a career where he’s under constant Allen detailed Michelle Obama toward the end of President scrutiny and continuing risk of harassment. Instead, he’s become Obama’s second term through her book tour in 2018. “To be able the role model for others that he never found as a kid. to experience things like the Supreme Court cases that had such a big impact on the fight for LGBTQ+ progress, to know that jubilation As a supervisory agent, Allen often consults with fellow law and immediate impact on my life — it was incredible,” he recalls. enforcement officers and agents in a mentorship role, which “To see the Obamas come out of office and become so much more includes giving talks about vulnerability, authenticity and after that, especially when I was with Michelle on her ‘Becoming’ leadership. At a class a few months ago, he says, “I talked about book tour, I got to see firsthand how that positive impact affected my vulnerability and my fear in being in this position as a gay man, about the struggles I’ve had. And the outpouring of support was people.” admittedly unexpected, and then that night one of the agents in While Allen speaks highly of his time as an active Secret Service the class came out to me at dinner, someone who’s been in the agent, he says that after Trump’s 2016 win, the mood shifted. career for 18 years and still doesn’t feel safe.”

“It’s been heartbreaking at times for so many of us — really, it’s been a recalibration for me personally,” he says. “It’s been quite Allen has found that being authentic in public can open the door the journey to watch all that take place, like Obama getting on Air for other people living in the closet, even outside law enforcement.

Force One for the last time; to literally be there to watch that was During a recent stop on his book tour, his conversation with the crowd seemingly inspired a worker there to come out to her surreal and humbling.” manager. “She’s probably 21,” he recalls. “And she raises her hand Today, Allen has planted roots in California, where he still works and asks what it looked like when I came out — what resource with the Secret Service as a supervisory special agent and is did I use to help me become comfortable in my own skin. And planning his wedding to fiancé Johnny, a physician. At some point, it turned into this beautiful moment where she’s in her place of he envisions becoming a father. It’s hard to imagine that it was only employment and in front of her manager. Eventually, everybody a few years ago when Allen came out as gay in the professional just starts supporting her and offering suggestions and support. setting. For many years, he kept his homosexuality under wraps, Just beautiful.” A few days later, the manager emailed Allen to including a stretch when, as a police officer, he got married and thank him and mentioned how much of a change she’s seen in the employee. divorced a few years later.

Working in law enforcement might seem like an unlikely fit for a Recently, Allen says, a US Navy mom sent him a DM and called him queer person, but Allen says an argument can be made that it’s her “new hero.” “She said, ‘My son is a naval officer, and he’s able actually relatively common for LGBTQ+ people who grew up in to live his life out and proud because you conservative areas that are neither safe nor affirming. “We tend to had the courage to share your story,’ and steer hard to the right, career-wise,” he explains. “A lot of us end it’s moments like that are… wow. This is up in the military or law enforcement because we’re trying to fight a win no matter what, at the end of the our true identity and present the most active, masculine vision of day. If this all ends right now, I’ve had an impact on somebody’s else’s life.” ourselves to the world.”

For Allen, the choice to steer right was a good one. “I thrived in it,” Sarah Bricker Hunt, a proud Eastern he says. “Law enforcement had such a critical impact on my life as Michigan University alum and the a kid, so that kind of came full circle when I went in to work for that managing editor for Pride Source/ Between The Lines, believes in very same agency we used to call on for help at home.” the power of intentional journalism Still, living “two separate lives” took its toll at times, Allen recalls. focused on people building their “I was deeply closeted, growing up outside Richmond, Virginia, communities through everyday acts which is deeply conservative. I didn’t have role models. I didn’t of love and service. have visible LGBT people I could relate to or connect with. I just had to forge ahead and figure it out on my own.”