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Dan Levy On Grief & Chosen Family

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Dan Levy Talks Grief and the Importance of Chosen Family

By Chris Azzopardi Photos courtesy of Netflix

The grief was very real for Dan Levy, who lost his grandma and rescue dog, Redmond, over the span of a couple of years during the pandemic. And then he did something very Dan Levy with that grief — he opened a blank page and got to work on “Good Grief,” a Netflix film, out now, that he wrote, directed and stars in.

The film is the “Schitt’s Creek” creator’s first major endeavor after his Emmy-winning show became a sleeper hit as the world shut down due to the Covid pandemic when we sheltered in place (in front of our TVs). In “Good Grief,” Levy plays Marc, an artist we meet at a Christmas party that ends tragically for his husband, Oliver (Luke Evans), who dies in a car accident right outside their place. Marc is left trying to make sense of his sudden loss and what he didn’t know about Oliver’s life before it ended, which takes him to a secret flat Oliver had in Paris. With Marc on his unexpected journey to healing his shattered self are his dearest friends, Sophie (Ruth Negga) and Thomas (Himesh Patel).

I recently spoke with Levy about the film, which he sees as an opportunity to flex new creative muscles, including his portrayal of a character who may be as stylish as David Rose even if he isn’t him, exactly.

It’s nice to have you back in regular yeah, I’m just glad that there’s a movie out there conversation, Dan. It’s been a few years. The that speaks to my life in a meaningful way, that world was on a real Dan Levy kick for a while. speaks to friendship and found family and the fact that, for a lot of people out there who are without [Laughs.] I think it’s nice to take a break. It’s nice kids and without partners, that friendships are the for everyone to take a break. You don’t want to great loves of our lives. ever overstay your welcome. So I’m happy that there’s something that I care about that I’m able to Did you draw from your own found family for talk about now. the film?

What goes through your mind when something I did. You know, I was that is so personal to you gets its wings and is realizing once you released into the world? get into your 30s — I’m 40 now, but was Well, it’s tough because it’s done. And I care 37 when I started deeply about it, and that’s all that really kind of developing the film matters to me outside of the viewers that watch it — relationships and hopefully find some point of connectivity in it. change.

Really It’s always a very sort of awkward thing to kind of good, long have to sell your work. friendships.

The more your life takes But I’m really happy with it and it’s a movie that on weight, the I know that I would like to watch and one that more that applies speaks to my life right now in a way that I feel is to friendships and quite truthful. And yeah, it’s a weird thing to put it what we’re willing out there and then have people do what they will to compromise and with it. what we’re willing But at the end of the day, I’m grateful for the not to, and the hard opportunity, ultimately. It’s a 180 from what conversations we people have come to know me from. And those need to have in opportunities don’t get handed out all the time. So I order to invest in our was really grateful that some people over at Netflix friendships so that were willing to go in this new direction with me. And they can have life

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going into the next 40 years of our lives.

trying to say about that topic with this movie?

It’s uncomfortable at times, but I’ve been I think so. I mean, I think in a way the character finding myself having really meaningful, truthful of Marc is such an avoidant, and essentially sort conversations with friends through this desire to be of ran away from his mother’s death into the arms OK. If you have a friendship that’s a decade or two of a very handsome and successful writer. And so decades old, there’s going to be some stuff that Oliver’s success, I think there was something nice you need to talk about at some point, like an actual about showing a gay man who’s successful and partner. And it’s about normalizing that, and the living a wonderful life, despite the odds, despite fact that those hard conversations are essentially where he came from. I think we hear through his an act of love. It’s an investment in a meaningful father’s eulogy that it wasn’t the easiest upbringing, relationship. and yet he succeeded. So there was something nice about showing that.

How did working on this film help you process But for Marc, it was all distraction. He was able your own feelings around grief? to really run away from his sadness into the arms of this beautiful new life that was soft and Writing it really was the first step. I was going comfortable and exciting and sexy and all of those through some grief. I lost my grandmother and I sort of wonderful things that would allow him to lost my dog. And it was the only thing I could do, quickly not forget, but repress. So this indulgence really. I wasn’t able to articulate it vocally. And I before helped to really set up Marc’s relationship sat down at my computer and just started to write to his husband’s success, and ultimately realizing an outline for this film, and it came quite naturally. that he doesn’t need it. He doesn’t need that life And it has nothing to do with my own personal in the end. He needed something a little bit more grief, but everything to do with the feelings and grounded, and he needed a life that was more the detangling of those feelings and trying to defined for himself. understand what it all means.

When we spoke in 2018, “Schitt’s Creek” So as a writer, I tend to put everything down on hadn’t become the cultural phenomenon that it the page and see what happens. Between “Schitt’s eventually became. And kind of overnight, even Creek” and this movie, I’ve worked through a lot though I know it was not overnight for you… of stuff. And it’s good because you can put your life into a swath of different characters, and you’re It kind of was, though. I think it was over the able to ask questions of yourself and others by way pandemic, which felt like both forever and a of dialogue and the way that different characters complete blink. interact with each other and process tragedy or love.

How weird to feel that during a pandemic, right?

It’s all been this wonderful catharsis of sorts, and this movie was huge for me in that sense. It led It continues to be a very strange thing. I talk to the me to this path of understanding that culminates cast about it. It’s a very weird thing to go indoors in a scene toward the end of the movie between for two years and come out a completely different my character and [actor] Celia Imrie, where she person socially. It’s really disorienting. And you ultimately says, “To avoid sadness is also to avoid don’t get to be out and about and slowly start to love.” That was one of the big takeaways from understand that people know who you are. this whole experience for me, and it just ended up on the page. And I didn’t really know where it It’s a very harsh confrontation of the fact that your came from, and yet it all was leading to that for life is completely different and your relationship me, that kind of revelation of the importance of with privacy is completely different. And it also being OK with sadness and letting it in and trying doesn’t allow you any time to understand that you to understand it. are, in fact, recognizable. So I think of that as a great opportunity, because there’s no ego attached In your own experience and through your to quote-unquote “fame” at this point because exploration of grief, how do you think queer we’re all still confused about what’s going on, to be people are impacted differently when it comes perfectly honest. to loss?

[Actor] Emma Corrin is a very close friend of mine, I guess I can only really speak to my own and they went through something very similar with experience because I think the community has “The Crown” over the pandemic as well, where experienced grief in so many different ways. And suddenly everyone knew who they were, and yet people are going to process it in so many different we were all indoors. So we’re still kind of thawing ways. I think for me, that really manifested in the to this new version of our lives. You can’t complain friendships. In this idea of having a safety net of about it, obviously, because it’s off the back of friends there to help you. Because I think for a lot great success and opportunity, but it is certainly of people in the community, they don’t have family disorienting and so weird. to turn to. I’m very lucky that I do. But I think this idea of friendships helping to soften the blow of Were you even more eager to leave your house some real tragedy speaks to the community as a after or during the pandemic to understand whole. what it might feel like as “Schitt’s Creek” became a success?

In both “Schitt’s Creek” and now “Good Grief,” wealthy characters comment in various ways No. It forced me into my house even more. on social class. Is there something you’re still [Laughs.] Now it takes more to get me out of the

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that. If people recognize me as David Rose for the rest of my life, let that be the case. It’s so rare that you get to participate in anything that affects people in that kind of way. But at the same time, I wish for any actor who is kind of being put in a box by way of their previous performances, that they’d be given the opportunity to show range. I think we’ve seen historically really great comedy actors excel in drama: Robin Williams, Tom Hanks, Jim Carrey...

We have to shift this idea that if someone becomes recognizable for one thing, that that’s somehow all they can do. I love the idea of pushing actors outside of their comfort zones.

And I think this movie did that with every actor, frankly, from Ruth [Negga] and Himesh [Patel] to Kaitlyn [Dever] and Emma. Everyone was playing slightly against type, which was really exciting to me. house, to be honest. Because it’s not something Have you ever sent a David meme or GIF? that I love, frankly. I accept it because it’s part of the job, but it’s certainly not something that I’m lusting No. I’ve never sent a David GIF. I have sent an after. And so yeah, it’s been very strange. It’s been Alexis GIF. I think that’s as far as I’ll allow myself wonderful. It’s great to hear people. I think fans of to go. I’m too scared of what it looks like to send the show are so generous and so kind with how a GIF of yourself. It’s the Canadian in me. I could they approach me and the things that they say and never. It’s way too arrogant. the comfort that the show has brought them. So I think some fandoms can be really, really intense. I have to ask you a question that everyone has I think the “Schitt’s Creek” fandom community is been wondering: When will there be a “Schitt’s Creek” revival? very kind.

They have a Canadian sensibility, even though I don’t know if we’ll ever do it. You end on a high note. Listen, we as a culture want, want, want, they might not be Canadian? want, want. We want it now. It’s binge culture.

Exactly. We’ve somehow succeeded in just We want to watch an entire season of a television show in two days because that’s what we want.

Canadianizing our wonderful fans of the show.

And yet, I think to not give people what they want Did you think intentionally about how to is cool. And I think it forces them to return to the move yourself away as an actor from David show. Think about all the shows that overstayed considering how iconic that character has their welcome. You will never go back and rewatch episodes of those TV shows. The shows that I become? go back to over and over and over again are the It’s a wonderful thing because there’s a real shows that left at just the right time, and I go back personal connection, I guess, to the character and because I want that feeling again. people feeling like they know me. I’m in some ways very close to David, and in some ways completely I think we are in a culture now that’s even more opposite. I think 80 episodes of doing the same critical than when “Schitt’s Creek” ended, frankly. character was the greatest experience, and yet And so I don’t know. If I wake up one day with you come out of it and you have a desire, as I think an idea for a movie or a Christmas special or all actors do, to flex a different kind of muscle. And something, and it is fucking brilliant and uses for me, I wanted to get into something a bit more everybody to the best of their ability, and all of our dramatic. Unfortunately, given the culture of our actors can come back and feel excited to be there industry, I only was receiving lesser versions of and feel like we’re doing something fresh and new, great. That idea has not come to me, and I’m not David Rose to play in other shows and movies. entirely sure it will. But we will see.

And so I set out to write something for myself that I thought was a challenge. It was all very guttural. Chris Azzopardi is the Editorial Director of Pride Source It was very instinctual. I didn’t have to strategize. I Media Group and Q Syndicate, the national LGBTQ+ tended to just listen to where my gut was telling me wire service. He has interviewed a multitude of to go. And it was a great challenge. And as an actor, superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey it really forced me to shake some habits that had and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New formed over 80 episodes of playing an incredibly York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via elastic, reactive human being. The character of Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

Marc in this movie is so still and so calm, and shaking some of those impulses to broaden the performance was a real challenge.

But I hope for anyone who becomes identified by way of a character: We should be so lucky. There’s

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Hot Getaway: PALM SPRINGS

By Bill Malcolm*

There’s always something new to do in Palm Springs, California, and this trip was no exception. The Agua Caliente Cultural Plaza is the new museum downtown that just opened and showcases the fascinating history and culture of the tribes in this area. Palm Springs is the premier LGBTQ+ vacation destination and received a 100% rating from the HRC. The city is part of eight cities in the Coachella Valley.

Where to Stay

novel dance bar, Reforma (check out their website for more info). They have large video The Descanso Resort (288 E. Camino Monte screens as well.

Vista) is just north of downtown in the Uptown/ Arts and Design District. The resort features Down the road in the Sunny Dunes area, The free bikes, a pool and spa, a continental Tool Shed (600 E. Sunny Dunes) has a fun breakfast, and a complimentary poolside leather crowd. Food is available, like tacos. lunch. Happy hour runs from 4 p.m. to 6 p.m. They have a huge outdoor patio in the back on weekends. The staff is very attentive. and dancers inside. Nearby is Club 541, Guests enjoy a saltwater pool, spa, mist- which I hear is fun. You can also shop at Q cooling system, and outdoor shower. Every Trading or Gear and have breakfast at a local spot in Descanso’s courtyard boasts views favorite in this strip. of Coachella Valley’s San Jacinto mountains, which rise 11,000 feet from the Valley floor. Over in Cat City (aka Cathedral City, another Other amenities include a 24-hour snack LGBTQ-friendly city in the Coachella Valley) cantina. This was my second stay there, and are several fun bars. The Barracks is known I loved it. Details at DescansoResort.com. for its Sunday beer busts and Wednesday underwear night. The One11 is good for Another alternative is the new Twin Palms talking and has drag and bingo crowds.

Resort at 1930 S. Camino Real. They have rooms facing a pool and hot tub, plus free What and Where to Eat use of bikes (and helmets). Enjoy the madeto-order continental breakfast and lunch The Coachella Valley is known for its dates, delivered at 12:30 p.m. Under the gaze of the olives, oranges, and grapefruit. Try a date San Jacinto mountains, twenty guest rooms shake. The Nature’s Health Food and Café and suites open to a swimming pool, spa, and features fresh juices and healthy options. Try patio space. Take the bike to the Smoke Tree the freshly squeezed carrot juice and order Plaza to dine out at one of the restaurants like the quesadillas. You will find them at 555 S. Native Foods or pick up some to-go foods at Sunrise. Trio is an excellent choice at 707 N. Ralph’s or Jensen’s food stores. Continue on Palm Canyon. The nearby 849 is particularly the many bike trails and bike lanes to explore good. Both are in Uptown, just north of the iconic Twin Palms neighborhood nearby downtown, which features trendy shops like (the original Modernist style of homes are Shag. found here), including a ride up to Indian Canyon. Details at TwinPalmsResort.com Always remember you are in California, and things are different here. You are not Nightlife in Kansas anymore. The “traditional potato salad” at the LaQuinta Resort lunch buffet Most bars are on Arenas Road downtown, was purple. And delicious. a one-block strip between Indian Canyon and Encilia. Hunters has a fun happy hour Getting There and Getting Around and outdoor patio with great drink specials.

It’s my favorite (and of the same owners as I took Southwest Airlines through Denver the one in Wilton Manors, Florida). Streetbar each way without incident. Get a window (224 E. Arenas) always has something going seat for the flight into Palm Springs, and you on. Go shopping at GayMart (305 E. Arenas). will see the Rockies and the Grand Canyon.

Other fun bars on Arenas Road include Southwest now allows you to take an earlier Blackbook, Chill Bar, and Dick’s. All feature flight for free—a user-friendly airline despite outdoor seating. Close by is the new hot their recent woes.

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Once in Palm Springs, UBER and LYFT (which is just two miles west of the airport). can get you around. However, both feature annoying surprise junk fee surcharges for this If you stay downtown or close to it as I did, and that. LYFT went to surge pricing twice, so you can walk or bike everywhere in the I took UBER instead. So shop around. perfect weather of this desert oasis. But beware—you are in Southern California, and You can walk outside the airport and catch the car is king. While Palm Springs has put in your UBER across the street (at City Hall) to many new bike lanes and trails, they still have avoid the airport surcharge. work to do despite having a perfect biking environment (flat with ideal weather).

Or better yet, take the #4 Sunline bus for $1 just west of City Hall (across the street from the airport). The #4 takes you right downtown

WHAT TO DO ·

Visit the new Agua Caliente Cultural Museum downtown to learn about the history and culture of the Agua Caliente band of the Cahuilla Native Americans. Learn about their history, where each canyon had its separate group. Learn about the Sec He, the mineral springs the museum sits on top of. Learn about basketry. A 12-minute animated film describes how the Agua Caliente settled in the Coachella Valley. It celebrates its heritage with a gathering place and an oasis trail along a stream with native plants. Their new Spa at Sec He is also a hit, where you can get a private bath and luxury treatment in the hot mineral spring; all are part of the Agua Caliente Hotel and Resort and Casino complex.

·

Visit Indian Canyon for a hike in an oasis with native palm trees.

·

Walk with the Front Runners and Walkers. They meet near the Mizel Center for a three-mile walk every day except Sunday at 8:00 a.m. It’s a fantastic way to meet folks. They meet in the parking lot at 480 S. Sunrise.

·

Enjoy the LGBT stars on the Palm Springs Walk of the Stars downtown. Truman Capote, Rock Hudson, and other stars used Palm Springs as a retreat from Hollywood. Palm Springs has been an LGBTQ destination since the 1920s.

·

Take in Village Fest Thursday night downtown, including visiting the Palm Springs Art Museum, which is accessible then. The Village Fest has food vendors and stuff for sale, including art. Pick up some dates. The Art Museum has food and music on the outdoor patio.

·

Swim at the Palm Springs Swim Center. The Olympic-sized pool has a stunning view of the mountains. You will find them at Pavilion Way.

·

Work out at the Steel Gym (formerly the World Gym). It’s extremely popular.

·

Hike on the Lykken Trail just west of downtown off Ramon Road. Enjoy the barrel cacti and other desert plants and the view of Palm Springs.

*Bill Malcolm writes a syndicated LGBTQ travel column and is based in Indianapolis.

He is a frequent visitor to the desert oasis of the Coachella Valley. He is a former resident of San Francisco.

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9 10 & Piedmont 991 Piedmont Ave NE 10 Campagnolo 980 Piedmont Ave NE 16 G’s Midtown 219 10th St NE 17 Henry’s 132 10th St NE 19 La Hacienda 900 Monroe Dr NE

6 My Sister’s Room66 12th St NE 7 X Midtown 990 Piedmont Ave NE

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1 FUTURE ATLANTA 50 Lower Alabama St. SW Suite 180

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14 Urban Body Fitness 500 Amsterdam Ave NE 15 Flex Spa

76 4th St. NW

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1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd

26 Barking Leather 27 Southern Nights

1510 Piedmont Ave Suite A 2205 Cheshire Bridge Rd

28 Heretic 29 Tokyo Valentino

2069 Cheshire Bridge Rd 1739 Cheshire Bridge Rd

30 Gravitee Fitness

2201 Faulkner Rd NE

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32 Atlanta Eagle 1492 Piedmont Ave NE 33 Felix's 1510 Piedmont Ave NE 34 The Hideaway 1544 Piedmont Ave NE 35 Mixx 1492 Piedmont Ave NE 36 Oscar's 1510 Piedmont Ave NE Mary's 1287 Glenwood Ave SE Sister Louisa’s Church 466 Edgewood Ave SE Lips Atlanta 3011 Buford Hwy NE 465 Boulevard SE The T Woof's 494 Plasters Ave NE

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39 Boy Next Door 40 Barking Leather

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1447 Piedmont Ave NE 1510 Piedmont Ave NE

41 Equilibrium Fitness 1529 Piedmont Ave, Suite L

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Wearing an astrology necklace so people know in advance I’m annoying.

Sometimes I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

Donʼt you just hate that moment you find out your actions have consequences?

Going forward, I’m labeling all stupid work emails as spam.

Oh, you want to circle back? I think I’m just going to circle on back out of here.

I’m like Cinderella when it comes to sports – I keep running away from the ball!

Not a hugger, but for you? Still no!

Superbowl Sunday @ Woofs

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Navigating Financial Independence as an LGBTQ+ Individual Edited by Mikkel Hyldebrandt Financial independence is a journey that requires savvy navigation, especially for LGBTQ+ individuals who often find themselves shouldering the responsibility of managing their finances alone. From savings and retirement planning to purchasing a home and car, the path to financial freedom demands finesse and foresight. While the journey may seem daunting, armed with the right knowledge and approachable strategies, achieving financial independence is within reach. require careful consideration and planning, For many LGBTQ+ individuals, the reality they also offer opportunities for long-term of financial independence often means stability and growth. Research mortgage shouldering the responsibility solo. Unlike options, explore down payment assistance heterosexual couples who may benefit programs, and consider factors such as from dual incomes and shared expenses, location and affordability when making these gay men and women often find themselves decisions. managing their finances independently. This can present unique challenges, but it also Navigating financial independence as an offers an opportunity for personal growth LGBTQ+ individual also involves being and empowerment. proactive about financial education and empowerment. Take advantage of resources One of the first steps towards financial such as workshops, online courses, and independence is learning how to budget financial literacy programs to enhance your and setting proper spending boundaries. knowledge and skills. Surround yourself with Budgeting allows you to track your a supportive network of mentors, advisors, expenses, prioritize financial goals, and and peers who can offer guidance and allocate resources effectively. Start by encouragement along the way. identifying your income sources and fixed expenses, then allocate funds for savings, While the journey to financial independence debt repayment, and discretionary spending. may often be undertaken alone, being in a Setting spending boundaries involves couple can offer certain financial benefits. being mindful of your financial limits and Shared expenses, dual incomes, and making intentional choices about how you combined assets can create opportunities allocate your resources. It’s about finding a for greater financial stability and security. balance between enjoying life’s pleasures However, it’s essential to approach financial and maintaining fiscal responsibility. By planning as a team and maintain open mastering the art of budgeting and setting communication about goals, priorities, and spending boundaries, you can take control expectations. of your finances and pave the way towards a more secure and prosperous future.

In addition to shared expenses, couples can also leverage their combined resources Another important step is establishing a to maximize savings and investment solid foundation of savings. Setting aside a opportunities. Consider pooling funds for portion of your income each month, even if joint savings accounts, retirement accounts, it’s just a small amount, can gradually build or investment portfolios to achieve mutual a safety net for unexpected expenses and financial goals. Collaborative decisionfuture goals. Consider opening a high-yield making and transparency are key to building savings account or exploring investment a strong financial foundation as a couple. options that align with your financial objectives.

Despite the challenges and complexities, achieving financial independence as an Retirement planning is another crucial LGBTQ+ individual is not only possible aspect of financial independence. LGBTQ+ but empowering. By prioritizing financial individuals may face additional challenges education, establishing smart savings habits, in securing retirement benefits, particularly and leveraging resources effectively, you if they work for employers who do not offer can navigate the path to financial freedom inclusive policies. It’s essential to explore with confidence and resilience. Remember, retirement savings options such as 401(k) the journey may have its ups and downs, plans, individual retirement accounts (IRAs), but with determination and perseverance, or other investment vehicles to secure your you can build a brighter and more secure financial future. financial future for yourself and your loved ones.

Purchasing a home or a car can be significant milestones on the road to financial independence. While these investments

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