‘We All Need a Will’
By Chris Azzopardi
Photos courtesy of Netflix
The influence of softhearted straight male allies for the LGBTQ+ community is gaining momentum in the era of Tim Walz. We can now count universally beloved comic actor Will Ferrell among those heterosexual men who, confident in their own identities, use their platforms to support and uplift marginalized groups.
Ferrell leads by example in “Will & Harper,” a documentary that emerged after his friend of 30 years, Harper Steele, came out as transgender in 2021 after decades spent in the closet. Ferrell and Steele met while working on “Saturday Night Live” — Steele as head writer for four years, and Ferrell as a main cast member from 1995 until 2002. Eventually, the two worked together at Funny or Die, where Steele was creative director, and Ferrell acted in two films she co-wrote: the Spanish-language comedy-western “Casa de mi Padre” and 2020’s “Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga.”
Now, in “Will & Harper,” directed by Josh Greenbaum (“Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar”) and coming to Netflix on Sept. 27, the two set out on a cross-country road trip, where Steele seeks to explore her identity in a country that doesn’t always embrace her. “I love it so much,” she says early in the film about the U.S. “I just don’t know if it loves me back right now.”
Meanwhile, Ferrell, who told Variety earlier this year when the film debuted at Sundance that he had “zero knowledge” about the trans community, aims to deepen his understanding of his friend’s journey. On their own, the widespread appeal of Ferrell’s films such as “Old School,” “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” and “Step Brothers” suggests that “Will & Harper” could attract a diverse range of potential allies who may be unsure where to begin. If there’s a lesson here, it might be that allyship can start in something as simple as a station wagon. In a video interview with Ferrell and Steele during the film’s premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival, Ferrell was genuinely moved just knowing he might make a difference. “Oh, that’s so nice,” he said, after I mentioned the significance of him being a queer-supportive straight guy who models sensitivity and unconditional love, admitting I felt like I was lacking men like him growing up.
But it was Steele who truly understood: “We all need a Will,” she added, leaning into her buddy during our interview, their decades of friendship on display in one brief, heartfelt embrace.
As of now, Will, how aware are you that this film might influence your fans’ perspectives and foster compassion toward trans individuals?
Will Ferrell: I think we’re getting a sense of that.
I mean, it’s something, once Harper said, “OK, you know what? Let’s do it,” that was probably the second part of the conversation — that she articulated the fact this is something that will help [her], but she brought up the great point of exposing that part of my audience that maybe wouldn’t be inclined to even investigate anything like this. I think that’s really exciting. I think that’s really exciting that that is a potential. And yeah, I’ve already gotten feedback that, I would say, a surprising segment of my audience that you wouldn’t have thought would have any interest is really interested in watching this.
Considering how some of your fans may feel about the trans community, did it feel like a risk to make this film?
Harper Steele: I don’t think Will cares about that sort of risk. That’s what I think. I brought that up early. Again, I brought up many times that Will is a brand as well as a human being. Bud Light did not fare well when they associated themselves with a trans person. But I don’t think that enters into Will’s mindset at all, really.
Ferrell: This is the advantage when you’re at the tail end of your career and you’re just coasting. [Laughs.]
Steele: [Deadpans.] He wouldn’t have done it, I guess.
Ferrell: [Sarcastically joking] Oh, no. Even a year ago, two years ago, I wouldn’t have done it. I was hot! I think in the most healthy way, once I make a decision, I don’t look back. Whether that’s a bizarre comedic premise or, whatever it is, even in my day to day. This was another case of, OK, there’s going to be a positive response and a negative response. Whatever potential fallout that could be directed my way, I’m not really concerned. I’m not concerned at all.
To me, you are like the Tim Walz of cinema. We’ve got Will and we’ve got Tim standing up for the LGBTQ+ community. Harper, I was wondering if you could talk about how you feel about men like Will, and even Gov. Walz, both of whom embody a positive example of tender masculinity that challenges the traditional notions of toxic masculinity. Steele: I’m not positive that it’s a new phenomenon. In fact, I almost think toxic masculinity is a newer phenomenon. I think people are threatened by trans people, by queer people, by women, and so this sort of toxic nature has grown a little bit out of this. I think the basic component is men who are not threatened by something they’re hiding themselves maybe, or something that they’re afraid of, or that is unknown. They are generally good people and they don’t either care about me or they’d like to meet me and talk to me. Almost all of the men in my life who are straight cis men
are the kinds of people who are comfortable with being themselves. I’m not going to say this about every toxic male, that they’re not comfortable being themselves. I do think that that kind of mentality, as women’s rights grew and as more queer people became present, the unknown and the scariness of that seemed to ratchet up.
How do you think telling stories like this one can shape American attitudes toward trans individuals and potentially impact pro-trans versus anti-trans legislation?
Steele: For us, I think it’s just a hope. I’m not sure we are confident that we can. But for me personally, and I won’t speak for Will, to lead by example is the way to get to that change. I’m not super strident, though I can be. I think this is a great example of allyship. And it’s a funny movie, so maybe we can bring people in with that laughter and illustrate that allyship.
Ferrell: We talk about the email that Harper sent where she came out, and then there was a followup in which she said, “Look, I’m not a very political person, but just by nature of being trans, I’m now a political person in a way. I just ask you as my friends to stand up for me. Do your best to, if I’m misgendered, just speak up on my behalf, that’s all I ask.” This was the light bulb moment for me: “Oh, if I’m really going to walk the walk here, maybe this is a way to do that and we could have a great time, and it would also be educational for me.” Just be that — lead by example. Show that civility still exists out there, not only between ourselves, but in the way we’re engaging with the world.
If there were to be a sequel, where do you envision you’d go together next?
Ferrell: I mean, where do you want to go? SaintTropez or something?
Steele: Saint-Tropez, or I was thinking space.
Ferrell: Oh, space. Maybe space! Maybe we get
stuck in space the same way these two astronauts’ eight-day trip has now turned into 80 days, or something like that.
Steele: Yeah, we’ll be up there.
Looking back on the beginning of your friendship, is there a specific “SNL” sketch that you both worked on together that significantly strengthened your bond and brought you closer together?
Steele: It’s a fraught environment. He was always fucking my sketches up.
Ferrell: On purpose. I [was] like, “I’m going to fix your wagon.”
Steele: I was like, “This dumb actor.” No. [Laughs.]
Ferrell: You have to remember, there’s so much failure on that show that the bonding really comes from trying stuff at the rewrite table and getting the laugh in the room, but the host hated it, so it never got picked.
Steele: Yeah, all the bonding happens with, like, “I love your sketch.” “I love yours.” Neither one of us is doing those sketches.
Ferrell: But let’s all go have a beer. I don’t think there was that lightbulb moment, that one sketch where we both were like, “That was so great.” But you get to know and trust and love each other through the process.
Chris Azzopardi is the Editorial Director of Pride Source Media Group and Q Syndicate, the national LGBTQ+ wire service. He has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, Vanity Fair, GQ and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @ chrisazzopardi.
Post-Pride Recovery: How to Recharge After Celebrating Atlanta Pride
Edited by Mikkel Hyldebrandt
Pride in Atlanta is always a whirlwind of excitement, from non-stop parties to long walks at festivals and dancing the nights away. But after days of celebration, your body (and mind) might be begging for some TLC. It’s important to take the time to recover and recoup so you can keep that Pride spirit alive without feeling burned out. Here are some helpful strategies to bounce back after all the fun.
Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate
With all the dancing, walking, and maybe drinking, your body is likely craving hydration. Alcohol and physical activity can easily dehydrate you, which leads to sluggishness, headaches, and that overall post-party haze. Start by drinking plenty of water—electrolyterich drinks or coconut water can also help replenish what you’ve lost. Hydrating will speed up your recovery and help you feel more energized.
Quick tip: Carry a reusable water bottle with you in the days following Pride and sip throughout the day to get your energy back on track.
Rest Up (Seriously)
After all the fun, your body needs time to recover. Whether you spent hours dancing or just spent more time on your feet than usual, getting adequate rest is key. Sleep is when your body repairs itself, so prioritize getting a good night’s sleep, or even take naps to help rejuvenate. If you’re having trouble sleeping after the excitement, try winding down with a calming routine—think herbal tea, a warm bath, or some gentle stretching.
Quick tip: Turn off screens an hour before bed and create a calming environment with soft lighting and music to help you drift off.
Stretch and Move Gently
Pride can mean lots of walking, dancing, and standing, which can leave your muscles feeling sore or stiff. A gentle yoga session or some light stretching can help alleviate tension and soreness, especially in your legs and lower back. Even a slow walk in a park can help get your blood flowing and loosen up tight muscles. Keep your movements light to aid recovery without pushing yourself too hard.
Quick tip: Focus on stretching your calves, hamstrings, and lower back. You’ll feel the benefits quickly after all that dancing and walking.
Nourish Your Body
Let’s face it: after a weekend of celebration, your eating habits might not have been the healthiest. Maybe you skipped meals, grabbed quick snacks, or indulged in late-night treats. Now’s the time to nourish your body with wholesome foods that will help restore your energy and support recovery. Fresh fruits and vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains will fuel your body and give you the nutrients you need to feel your best again.
Quick tip: Try making a hearty salad or smoothie with ingredients like spinach, berries, avocado, and nuts to refuel with vitamins and antioxidants.
Reconnect with Sexual Health
Pride can be a time of liberation, and sometimes that means more sexual activity. It’s important to take care of your sexual health as part of your overall post-Pride recovery. Check in with yourself and your partners, and consider getting tested for STIs, especially if you’ve been sexually active with new or multiple partners. Regular testing is a healthy habit and shows that you prioritize both your health and the well-being of the community.
Quick tip: Many LGBTQ+ health centers and organizations offer free or low-cost STI testing. Make it a regular part of your health routine, just like hydrating and eating well!
Photos by: Russ Bowen-Youngblood
Vander’s Pump Rules
By Spencer White
Vander Pulaski, a bona fide star in the adult film industry known for his charisma and versatility, is making a bold move into the world of kink with his latest role in KinkMen’s Do What I Say. In the intense film that delves into the realms of domination and submission – and explores the dynamics of control and obedience - Pulaski teams up with Greg Hollywood. Together, the men add a new dimension to kink, showcasing their willingness to push boundaries and embrace the edgier side of adult entertainment. Vander Pulaski explains more from his rural and remote home in Oregon.
Are you originally from Oregon?
No, I’m from Pennsylvania. I grew up in a suburban neighborhood north of Pittsburgh. My dad was a family doctor and my mom was a physical therapist. They used to share an office. I have a lot of memories of being in their offices as a kid, including one of my dad showing me how a sigmoidoscope is used to look inside a person’s colon.
Were you a jock?
I wouldn’t have considered myself a jock at the time, but I did swim competitively from about ages 10 until 17.
When did you have your first same sex experience?
I was 15 the first time I had sex. I bottomed for a friend on the swim team. I had experienced oral sex at a park near me before then, though. I had heard it was “cruisy” in AOL chatrooms so I checked it out. I met an older guy leaning against a tree.
What led to your pursuing a career in adult film?
I have always been a bit of an exhibitionist. I am rather introverted by nature, but am paradoxically more comfortable when I am naked. I also was looking for a way to make decent money while I was pursuing my career goals in biology. I didn’t consider porn as a career path until fan sites became viable. They have allowed me more flexibility and self-determination in the industry while also challenging my previous assumption that I would age out of the industry sooner than now.
What are the best parts of the job? Having sex with incredibly hot guys.
How has being a porn star impacted your dating life?
I have had partners who had difficulty accepting my career. Most recently, with the fan sites, it has been difficult at times balancing how much to share with fans. I don’t want to monetize every sexual experience I have, nor can I perform on demand. It is still a constant question of how much of myself I want to keep private for me and my real-life partners.
When did you first discover kink?
It depends how you define a kink. As for bondage, I was first tied up by a friend when I was 19. He introduced me to both dom/sub power dynamics as well as a few specific kinks, including rope bondage, watersports, and CBT.
Do you like pain?
Not generally. But some pain begins to feel good, like qas with CBT. Or when the pain is a tribute to the power dynamic at play, I like that.
Do you find pleasure in being disciplined? Yes, sir.
The scene in KinkMen’s “Do What I Say” is literally Greg Hollywood beating your balls… that had to hurt!
Beating my balls hurts in a really good way. I like it!
Were the screams real?
If I’m screaming, it’s real. I am a pretty terrible actor. Directors often encourage me to react and play up what is happening in a scene. I prefer to have the reactions be legitimate. It also encourages the tops to increase their intensity!
How did the director keep things from getting out of hand on set?
There are always safe words. I have never had to use them.
Do you prefer being the dom or sub?
Generally, I prefer being submissive. Though I do think there is a bit of an age/ maturity component to that. As I get older and become more of a daddy, domming has seemed more natural.
Will you play the dom role in an upcoming KinkMen film?
I played the dom role in my scene with Buck Richards! I have not fi lmed another scene as a dom since then, but who knows what the future holds. I would defi nitely be willing!
What is something fans would be surprised to know about you?
I have a master’s degree in biology and professionally, I am a cannabis breeder, agronomist, and mycologist.
What is the biggest misconception about Vander Pulaski that you would like to clear up once and for all?
People may be surprised that I often go through phases in sexual desire. While I can at times have an insatiable sexual appetite, it is not infrequent that I have little interest in sex for weeks at a time. I am always down to bate it, though.
What makes you smile?
Good times with family, friends, and nature. Good music. Tropical beaches and forests. Reaching a personal goal.
What makes you angry?
Right-wing politics and environmental destruction.
You find a magic genie bottle. What are your three wishes?
A society where wage-labor is obsolete, and humans have moved beyond capitalism. A world that has solved the most pressing environmental issues. And lastly, I want people to be free and happy to choose their own destiny, whatever that entails, constrained only by the limitations of our reality and without any infl uence of dogmatic religions and state power, as long as they do not interfere with the rights of others.
Which celebrity would you most like to slide into your DMs?
Ilana Glazer or Sarah Silverman.
You’re about to be hit by a truck (sorry). What flashes before your eyes?
That I had a good run while it lasted!
What does your gravestone read?
Lived life by the load.
Vander Pulaski stars in KinkMen’s “Do What I Say”, available now on KinkMen. com
Photos by: Russ Bowen-Youngblood
Dini
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WESTSIDE
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DINING MIDTOWN CASA ALMENARA 991 Piedmont Ave NE casa-almenara.com
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DEKALB
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RETAIL MIDTOWN
BARKING LEATHER AFTER DARK barkingleather.com 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
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BOY NEXT DOOR MENSWEAR boynextdoormenswear.com 1000 Piedmont Ave NE, Ste A GCB & PLEASURES brushstrokesatlanta. com
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Photos by: Russ Bowen-Youngblood
We all have those moments of ‘wait, did they just say that?’ Lucky for you, we compile the best of the best right here on this page. Want to join in on the b*tch session? Submit your own nuggets to info@davidatlanta.com.
Not smilig until Friday. Nothing is funny this week after Pride.
Lol, what are you studying at Brown University? Poop?
Me? Very talks back, very mouthy, very has no filter.
Been in my ‘wait huh’ era for far too long.
Let a man talk uninterrupted about himself for 10 minutes, and heʼll be like “wow, I really like you”.
My taste in men is a form of self-harm.
I hate repeating myself, but I will get mad if you don’t repeat yourself.
I would love to be mysterious, but I just can’t STFU!
