Advice from seasoned Tukkies

Thabo Moenyane

Adapting to student life and all its challenges can be arduous. Not only can forming meaningful connections be challenging, but it may also prove difficult to balance one’s social and academic lives. However, first-years need not fear this new chapter of their lives. PDBY interviewed senior students to give the newbies an idea of what awaits them, since they have been here “van toeka af”.

On the topic of friends, Tshepiso Monare, a final-year psychology student, advised: “The easiest way to make friends is definitely in lectures. This may even benefit you when you need help to understand something or if you need a study buddy.” It all starts with initiating small talk with someone sitting next to you. Musa Mngomezulu, a final-year languages student, recommended that first-year students make a point to attend the first-year social events because that is where they can try to socialise and make new friends.

Furthermore, there are many UP societies that students can join where they can mingle and meet like-minded people. These societies include UP&OUT (for students that identify as part of the LGBTQIA+ community), the Wine Tasting Society (for students who love wine and enjoy wine tasting) and the Health & Mind Wellness Society (for students that want to lead a healthy lifestyle). For more information on these and other societies UP has to offer, visit https://societies.up.ac.za.

“However, you need to be heedful of the friendships you make here because you will be exposed to all kinds of lifestyles. This could make you susceptible to living a lifestyle you do not want to live, if you do not stand firm in what you believe in and apply it to your life and friendships,” cautioned Mngomezulu. Peer pressure is rife among students. As much as having friends is important; one should be mindful of the kind of friends they make because the company you keep does have an influence on you, either directly or indirectly. “Why am I here?” This is a question that should always be directed at yourself in case you forget and get swayed by peer pressure.

All this applies to romantic relationships as well. It is advisable to forget about that high school teacher who said you will find your soulmate at university. “There is a misconception that we will stumble upon our soulmates, Prince or Princess Charming, when we get to varsity. Little do we know that we will kiss many frogs before we find our forever, or we might never even do that,” said Gontse Mabaso, a sociology graduate. It is okay to want to be in a relationship; however, make time for your friends and work as well. And do not do anything you are uncomfortable with just because your partner expects you to do it. Do something because it is what you truly want.

PDBY approached UP&OUT to give relationship advice to first years, to which they suggested that students should not rush into finding a partner or being intimate with a partner in order to prove their love for them or to validate their own sexuality.

Lastly, remember to LIVE. Your student era will end before you even realise it. Be bold. Be wild. Be young and free. Be you. “First-years should feel every emotion, cry, laugh and smile with their friends or lovers because all those little mundane things add up to memories that we cannot put price tags on,” concluded Gontse.