Dr. Ian Erasmus
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Tuks se amptelike studentekoerant / Official Tuks student newspaper / Kuranta ya baithuti ya semmušo ya Tuks
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16May2011
First year student hit by car
Internet dating
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year73issue11
Die superhelde is terug
Rad vs Sad: A memo on memes
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Two ex-Tukkie students doing some illegal base jumping off the HSB on the afternoon of Friday, May 13. Apparently the jumpers, who wish to remain anonymous, have wanted to jump off the HSB since their rst day on campus. The jumpers managed to sneak onto the roof, jump
off and have the whole thing lmed all without being apprehended by security. Students should however be aware that if caught they face severe consequences. The full video can be seen here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4BFqSk3rnI
Parliament Speaker in hot water ANKE OLIVIER During the monthly meeting of student parliament, which took place on May 11, it came to the attention of parliamentarians and the Student Representative Council (SRC) that both the Speaker and Deputy Speaker’s positions in parliament were unconstitutionally voted for. Chaos broke out in parliament as parliamentarians disregarded the authority of the Speaker, Peter Sleeman. Some very upset parliamentarians even accused Sleeman of being a “criminal”. The case has now been brought before the Constitutional Tribunal of the University of Pretoria for adjudication. Deputy Justice of the Constitutional Tribunal, Katherine Harding, stated that the tribunal can unfortunately not comment on cases that are still pending. “I can’t confirm the date of the hearing until the parties themselves have been notified,” she added. “Probably two weeks.” Sleeman states that he was unaware of the fact that his position as Speaker was unconstitutionally filled,. “I am frankly surprised that this matter has not been brought up before, by the political interest in parliament to see me removed,” he explains. “However, the fault lies with the constitutional tribunal who ran the meeting of 4 October 2010.” According to other parliamentarians, including Deputy Speaker Francois Cloete, some individuals were well aware of the fact
that the positions were unconstitutionally filled as early as January this year. According to Cloete, this is the first time parliament spoke about their unhappiness with Sleeman’s performance as Speaker. “Many feel that he does not do his job,” Cloete explained. Cloete added that the move was not politically motivated but purely out of concern for students. SRC member, Mark Vorster, says that Sleeman does not know the constitution well enough which affects his competence as Speaker. “This bad leadership is costing students and parliament,” Vorster explains. Head of Justice and Constitutions on the SRC, Michael Matlapeng, stated that Sleeman does not know his duties and powers. “A lot of the time he does not know what he is doing,” Matlapeng explains. “Reporting back is a nightmare although we are doing our (the SRC’s) job.” Sleeman’s answer to these accusations is simple: “If this is believed then why has there not been a motion of no confidence in myself as Speaker?” Sleeman argues. “I will not enter a mudslinging event with members of the parliament. I am there to serve their needs and only that.” The case was brought before the tribunal by parliamentarian Johan Conradie, who is a post-graduate engineering student. “I would like to see a better candidate be chosen for the position of Speaker,” Conradie explains.
“This bad leadership is costing students and parliament”
Photos provided
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23 May ’11
Is that a quarter life crisis floating in my vodka? If you are reading this editorial, congratulations, you have survived yet another apocalypse. Is it just me, or are the threats of impending doom becoming a regular feature on the annual calendar? We seem to be experiencing an apocalypse every few months now. Regardless, if this one happened to be true this time around and you’re still alive this ne Monday morning, well done. You probably deserved it. I spent the night the world was supposed to end celebrating the rst anniversary of my 21st birthday. I’m writing this the week before the actual event though, but it was probably awesome. I hope I got great presents. It’s a strange thing, aging. And I’ve been staring at the ickering computer screen for an hour trying to think of something new and deeply profound to say about getting older (in between some Facebook stalking and episodes of Glee) but I have nothing. Probably because the wisdom hasn’t struck yet. I don’t like getting older, because the older I get the less I feel I’ve accomplished, and the more adult I feel I should be. And when I say “adult” I mean in the have-a-job-and-house-inthe-suburbs-with-screaming-children sort of way. Which is absurd, because I nd the idea of living in suburbia completely alien and it is very unlikely that my current philosophy on life or plans for the future will lead me anywhere near a gated community, where even the trees looked polished, anytime soon. But still, lately my birthdays come accompanied by this tiny but pressing feeling that
www.perdeby.co.za perdeby@up.ac.za EDITORIAL EDITOR IN CHIEF: Carel Willemse EDITOR: Beyers de Vos NEWS: Nina van Wyk news@perdeby.co.za FEATURES: Marie van Wyk features@perdeby.co.za RES UPDATE: Katlego Mkhwanazi resupdate@perdeby.co.za ENTERTAINMENT: Meagan Dill entertainment@perdeby.co.za SPORT: Charlotte Keuris sport@perdeby.co.za COPY: Hayley Tetley LAYOUT: Hickley Hamman VISUALS: Desré Barnard
TEAMS LAYOUT Camilla Coertse Celeste Theron Allan Le Roux JP Nathrass COPY Ruhan Robinson Caitlin Roberts Jaco Kotze Itumeleng Ramano Jenna-Lee Fortuin Mandisa Mbele Somarié Gravett Saneze Tshayana Nadine Wubbeling Yuan-Chih Yen Marissa Gravett
Editorial From the Editor
I need to Do Things With My life, which is silly because, of course, I am. I’m doing this. Luckily though, the feeling only lasts for a little while and can be safely ignored from the comfort of the benches in Aandklas. I do suspect however, that this particular gnawing feeling gets a little more desperate every year. Wow, I sound like I’m on the verge of some kind of midlife crisis, when really though, life is pretty much great. Unless you count the fact that I might have died in the latest apocalyptic disaster. Oops. If you are being chased by esh hungry zombies right now (because as I’ve said before, there ain’t no apocalypse like a zombie apocalypse), then at least you have this newspaper to use as a make shift weapon or as re kindling. Or alternatively, to read. If you are going to read it, then I suggest you pay close attention to the awesome articles we have on everything from cults to internet dating to sadomasochism to free running in this edition. We also report on the near-tragic accident which occurred last week outside the gates of the men’s residences. And if that isn’t enough to sustain you through the cold dystopian nights, then I don’t know what is. Remember: don’t ever make a grizzly bear angry. C’est la vie Beyers
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Perdeby is printed by Paarlmedia. All rights reserved. Contributions are welcome. All due care will be taken with materials submitted, but Perdeby and printers can not be held responsible for loss or damage. The editor reserves the right to edit, amend or alter material in any way deemed necessary. Perdeby can not be responsible for unsolicited material. The opinions expressed in Perdeby are not necessarily those of the editors and printers of Perdeby.
For counselling and guidance in an unplanned pregnancy, contact 0800 864 658 or go to www.adoption.org.za
Dear Tukkie In this issue, I want to briey respond to the request by some of you to make my views known on the Equality Court case between Ernst Roets and Julius Malema. I do not have to. However, if that will contribute towards efforts to build a better nation and society, I share them as requested. I want to declare at the outset that unlike the majority who are of the view that the court case was unnecessary, I think that it is a necessary phase of the discourse that has degenerated into sporadic tensions between opposing groups, this affecting the mood of the country. The court should be able to guide us in one way or another although the ultimate solution lies with the citizens outside the court of law. My view is informed and supported by developments during the hearing. Outside the court, supporters of the ANCYL president asserted their right to freedom of expression while inside, exchanges between Mr Malema and Mr Roelofse took us back to the “bad old days” with Malema rising to the occasion in a similar fashion as did
Our Voice is a non-prot organisation with the purpose of advocating on behalf of those living in the extremes of continual insecurity. We currently request your support and assistance to 300 refugees in the Riet shelter, Orange farm and Rosettenville camps who are victims of the recent xenophobic attacks. Reintegration of refugees is not a matter of simply sending people back to the places from which they ed. Help is needed if reintegration is to be viable, and the lives of these people are not to be risked.
We are currently in desperate need of the following: • Sugar • Washing powder • Tooth brushes • Milk for babies (Nespray & Nestle Nan) • Bars of bath soap and Sunlight soap • Sanitary pads • Maize meal • Sugar beans • Rice • Any second hand clothing or blankets • Any cooking pots, electrical plate stoves or gas cookers Items can be dropped of at the Perdeby ofces (opposite Pie City)
Please do not hesitate to contact the chairperson of Our Voice, Jauffré Basubi at 083 495 7986
Robert Sobukwe during his treason trial in the early 60s or Nelson Mandela during the Rivonia trial in the mid-60s or Steve Biko during the SASO-BPC trial in the mid-70s. He may have scored a lot of points for himself and his supporters but our nation was the loser, not because of him or them but due to the revelation of where South Africans stand with each other seventeen years into our democracy. In his testimony, Mr Mantashe, the ANC Secretary General told the court that the “dubul’ ibhunu” line in the song “Ayesaba amagwala”, evokes the same feeling in some white South Africans as does the “vierkleur vlag” in some black South Africans. This is all the more a reason for South Africans to be concerned about what we need to take along on our journey to a brighter future and what needs to be discarded. Perhaps discard is not the most appropriate word to use as the aim is not to deny the past but to take from it what is relevant for the present phase of our nation building project. We are compelled by the constitution to work towards national reconciliation and the state is expected to facilitate this. Given that so much has been sacriced on both
sides of the table, including lives, it is my view that offensive symbols of the past should be kept in archives and museums where they become a resource for those interested in a particular phase of our history. They should not be part of our daily lives while “struggling” to create a “new nation”. This should equally apply to our attitudes and the language we use, bearing in mind that there is “effect” to every “cause”. The threat of Steve Hofmeyer to use the “K” word in his song is a good example, and our country can only allow or encourage such at its own peril. It is the duty of every enlightened member of our society to discourage any action that threatens to bring back the “bad old days” regardless of which quarters it comes from. Our energies should be challenged towards resisting wrong while working towards the positive. Best wishes Prof McGlory Speckman
Res Update
23 May ‘11
The Rag Procession gives back ZOE NGOMBANE
Pssst... would like to remind everyone that it’s actually winter. So Welpies, the idea is to keep warm, not showcase your entire anatomy. There is nothing hot about a girl who looks like a dry leaf hanging from a branch on a windy day. Face it girls, you used to be hot, but that went out the window the day you decided to compete with the guys. Does the word “manpower” ring a bell? Pssst... was impressed with the residences who showed off their artistic side at the Expression Arts Expo. But Pssst... isn’t sure what Mopanie was doing at the event because they looked out of place. Pssst... mistook them for Taaibos because they looked like lost puppies. You should stick to the art of jock running, seeing as its the only thing you are still good at. Pssst... gures Mopanie was better than the Curlitzia girls who hung around only to leave as soons as the expo began. Jasmyn girls sure know how to bring the house down every day of the week. Stones would like to thank you for paying their rent, ladies. Pssst... would like to inform everyone that Boekenhout is missing a bench. Pssst...’s suspect list: Taaibos, Taaibos and Taaibos. Pssst... thinks Boekenhout should get over themselves. You may intimidate Taaibos, but no else cares. Pssst... thinks Olienhout should stay away from pub crawling. It’s obvious that you aren’t very good at it. At all. Fighting with your fellow res mates, stealing tip jars ... Pssst... can only laugh, but at least your macho man status went up a point. Pssst... would however like to advise Olienhout to keep it in their pants. Aandklas is dirty and Pssst... wasn’t impressed. Pssst... hears that the Lilium ladies were being auctioned off. Pssst... thinks some of them should’ve just stayed at home ‘cause nobody wants to waste their money. Pssst... was shocked to see the Erika girls use their female assets to win a game of pool. Pity it wasn’t international cleavage day because they would’ve represented. Pssst... would like to tell the female residences at Groenkloof to stop gate-crashing socials and go where they are actually invited. In other words, stop hanging around Kiaat on Thursday nights when you should be somewhere else. Lastly, Pssst... would like to know if Taaibos is capable of having fun without drowning themselves in alcohol.
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After months of recovery from Rag procession hangovers and the blisters under many feet, it can nally be said that the lives of students as well as the Pretoria community, will be changing after the procession that took place on 20 February. Residences and day houses reached out their cans to an estimated crowd of 30 000 people. As a result, the Rag committee managed to collect R35 000. These funds will be going into the Tusho portfolio and will be distributed into the respective charities. Tusho is a charity portfolio and a division of Rag which heads the distribution of funds to different charities. Each residence is required to team up with the Rag committee on projects to help in the raising of funds. The residences go out and nd sponsors, while working towards the creation and completion of their oats for the procession. Although the procession presents a big opportunity for the residences to raise a lot of funds, donations are not collected in just one day. The residences all receive their fundraising cans in February and are given
four months, from then until early in May to raise funds. All of the residences and day houses decide what their nal target is. The funds raised from the can donations amount to R35 000 at this stage, with some that still need to be paid in. According to Lesego Moeketsi, Tuks Rag chairperson, the Rag committee estimates that the total amount of the donations will be approximately R70 000, which equals the amount raised last year. Even though the procession was a success, Moeketsi admits that there were some challenges. One of the challenges was that the students had difculties with collecting money from the bystanders. “The students could not break formation and go to the spectators,” said Moeketsi. This was due to the restrictions by the Metro Police. “It is the students’ spirit and hard work that has grown the procession into the success that it is today,” said Moeketsi. “With the ongoing support of our sponsors and service providers, it can only get better.” So next year make sure that you join all the residences and day houses so they give back to those less privileged.
Photo: Michelle Prins
Wie verteenwoordig jou koshuis? KATLEGO MKHWANAZI Vir jare was daar `n groot gaping tussen studente, die VSR en UP se bestuur. Dit was moeilik om inligting aan studente deur te gee, omrede daar geen suksesvolle pogings aangewend is om bestuur en studente bymekaar te bring nie. Baie studente het gevoel dat die VSR nie genoeg doen om studentesake op te los nie. Maar dinge het verander hierdie jaar, veral in die koshuise. Die VSR het besluit om `n VSR-lid aan te wys vir elke koshuis. Volgens Charl Oberholzer, voorsitter van die VSR, is dit deel van die VSR 2011 se visie om meer betrokke by studente lewe te wees en om werklik te weet wat aangaan op grondvlak. Die doel is om kommunikasie te verbeter tussen die verskillende studente-strukture. Perdeby het vir Oberholzer gevra wat die VSR hoop om te bereik met hierdie projek: “Ons hoop om `n
beter verhouding tussen die VSR en die koshuise as `n geheel te bereik.” Oberholzer het ook gesê dat hulle belangrike sake van elke koshuis na topbestuur toe wil neem. “Ons wil langtermyn oplossings vir probleme vind wat blyk om elke jaar plaasvind,” sê Oberholzer. VSR-lede sal huisvergaderings bywoon en belangrike inligting wat `n invloed op studente het, deurgee. VSR-lede het reeds begin met die bywoning van die koshuisvergaderings. Volgens Oberholzer is dit baie belangrik dat die VSR deel van elke studente-struktuur is, omdat die VSR `n invloed het op baie besluitnemingsliggame van die universiteit. “Die universiteitsbestuur het voldoende inligting nodig om besluite te neem wat studente sal bevoordeel,” sê Oberholzer. Photo: Provided
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23 May ‘11
Res Update
Culture shock in res
REFILOE NYATHIKAZI As expected, life for an international student can be challenging. For some international students, life is challenging in more ways than one. International students are expected to adapt to a new country, different cuisine and South Africa’s different languages. This can be a huge culture shock. According to Afra Yousif Hussein Khairalla, a Nerina second-year student from Saudi Arabia, living in res was difficult for her at first: “I did not understand the HK,
they spoke as if they were speaking to the South Africans only.” Khairalla could not understand any of the Nguni languages and her English was weak so she struggled to make friends. Cynthia Ibale, a resident in Jasmyn who is from Uganda said, “I got annoyed in my first year when people spoke to me in a language I didn’t understand. People keep forgetting that not everyone is from South Africa.” According to Kendi Mwabila, international students and relations member of the SRC, there are between 4 000 to 6 000
International students speak out ANKE OLIVIER International students at the University of Pretoria (UP) held an International Students Forum on May 12. At the forum a report was given on what the SRC has been doing for international students with regard to the challenges they face. The meeting also gave students the opportunity for students to raise issues they are currently struggling with. There are currently about 6000 international students at UP, which is about a tenth of the student population. The meeting was organized by the SRC representative for international students, Kendi Mwabila. She was also assisted by the SRC member for Tukkie Pride, Tebogo Twala, and other members of the International Students Society (UPI). According to Mwabila, acquiring a study permit is at the top of the list of challenges that international students face, “Suffice to say, the maladministration of Home Affairs has not helped in this matter.” She also says that if the police get hold of international students without their study permits, they consider them illegal immigrants. Accommodation has been one of the greatest challenges international students face. Mwabila says that the Private Accommodation office was removed from campus because they exploited
international students. “However, it has not been easy to solve this issue as most of the accommodation companies are outside the campus,” says Mwabila. Another issue discussed at the forum was that every international student is required to carry their passport at all times, in case that they are asked for identification documents. “Failure to provide your passport [and] a night in jail will be the destination,” says Mwabila. “A student card does not serve as an identification document.” Other concerns faced by international students were their struggle to secure financing and alternative medical aid options. “Among international students, there is a general feeling that the university doesn’t really care that much about their welfare,” says Mwabila. “However, dealing with the issues that we all face might be the first step to create a sense of belonging to the university.” Despite a very low turnout, the meeting was described as quite productive. Pressing issues were addressed and the International Students Division answered various questions regarding these issues. A few SASCO members were also present. They insisted that international students join hands with them in fighting the challenges that are common to both parties.
“Among international students, there is a general feeling that the university doesn’t really care that much about their welfare”
international students on campus. Most of them fail their first year because of the language barrier. Not only is language a huge shift in culture, but the different res traditions also add to the culture shock. Such as the famous sokkie dance that is held at most of the male residences. This dance style not only makes one feel like they are burning calories on the dance floor, but also leaves you disorientated. “I liked the sokkie dance and the Maroela guys were great with the sokkie,” said Jemma Wicks, a first-year from Zimbabwe. Unlike most of the students in res who can go home during varsity holidays, international students have to stay behind in res because they don’t have much of a choice. “You feel bad when everyone talks about going home, but you cry and get over it,” said Ibale. Ibale only goes home during the June and December holidays. Valerie Mvere, a second-year Nerina resident, said, “I usually apply for holiday accommodation and it is annoying because you have to repack all your belongings. It is so inconvenient.” All international students occasionally have to move to other residences. This happens because it’s easier to keep the few students in one residence where they can be kept safe. The university also uses some of the residencs to host students who attend educational programmes on campus during breaks. So it’s just another process of packing and unpacking and then
packing again. “It’s quite stressful to move to another res during holidays,” said Ibale. But even with the tears of being home sick and the fear of being far away from home, Ibale encourages all international students to embrace the experience of being in a different country. There are associations on campus such as the University of Pretoria International Students’ Association (UPI) that offer support to international students. Mwabila explained that UPI is a socially driven association for international students. “UPI is a forum for international students to interact; it is an umbrella for different societies,” said Mwabila. She added that UPI organises social events like free braais and trips to Menlyn for international students (South Africans are more than welcome to attend). When asked what can be done in res to make international students feel more at home, Ibale stated that students in res, especially HKs, should try to create a friendly, homey environment for those who are not from South African. “I’m not asking for special treatment, but they should understand that we come from far, especially the first years who are probably scared,” said Ibale. “People should stop being condescending towards international students,” said Wicks. So the next time you come across an international student, try to be understanding. You may provinces away from home but they are countries away from theirs. Image: Gustav Reyneke
News
23 May ‘11
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First year student hit by car DAVID CROSS The entrance to the male residences on Duxbury Road played host to an accident on the morning of May 16. Cecile Reeders, a rst-year student at the University of Pretoria, was involved in a head-on collision with a vehicle while making her way home on her bicycle. Various witnesses reported that the accident was caused by the driver of a blue Volkswagen Polo that skipped a red robot and collided with Reeders. The driver of the vehicle was also taken to hospital to be treated for shock. Roanne Crouse, a witness on the scene played a pivotal role in ensuring that Reeders remained comfortable whilst waiting for the ambulance’s arrival. “The ambulances arrived here within ten minutes of the accident and took over immediately.” ER 24 paramedics reported that Reeders had sustained serious head trauma and internal bleeding and had to be transported to a trauma facility immediately. She was taken to Little Company of Mary hospital and is currently being treated for serious head trauma. Paramedics on the scene initially reported that Reeders would not survive the accident, but Reeders is reportedly making signicant progress and doctors have conrmed that she suffered no brain damage and is regaining full command of her reexes. She is expected to remain in ICU for two weeks. The University of Pretoria conrmed that they were aware of the accident and it is being investigating by SAPS, but emphasised that the accident did not occur on university premises. Recent Arrive Alive statistics show that 36 people are killed on South African roads on a daily basis, with pedestrians contributing to a third of these fatalities. Perdeby wishes Reeder speedy recovery and eagerly awaits her return to university. Photo: Desré Barnard
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23 May ‘11
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Features
23 May ‘11
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Sadomasochism: whipping it back and forth MASENTLE NTHOLENG Whip in hand, cold hard chains, studded boots and spiked gloves: you would think that these are training and taming instruments for a wild beast. This, of course, would only be applicable if you did not think they would make an awesome addition to your kinkcupboard. In the words of Rihanna: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me.” This, fellow students, is not for the faint-hearted. Sadomasochism, receiving sexual pleasure from acts which involve giving and getting either pain or humiliation. This would be the perfect time to wonder why you enjoyed giving/ receiving that hicky last week Saturday in the dark and dingy corners of Hateld. There is nothing like “vampire-like” roleplaying to get the blood owing, huh? Unlike hippies or emos, sadomasochism is a very taboo culture. There are three subdivisions of this social phenomenon: bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism (the act of enjoying hurting or humiliating other people) and masochism (the enjoyment of things that seem painful). These terms originate from the names of two authors, Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch respectively, based on their popular writings regarding aggressive and possibly violent sexual behaviour. You may have heard of the couple in Germany, who was arrested for public indecency. The woman was dragging her husband, who was on all fours and stark naked, around a shopping centre with a leash around his neck. When
questioned, the couple said they were engaging in what they considered normal sexual activity for them, and thought that it was okay if nobody was getting hurt. Why do people engage in sadomasochist behaviour though? According to modern psychology, the answer largely depends on the individual. For some, being obedient, helpless and submissive offers some form of therapeutic escape from guilt,
responsibility or stress. For others, being under the control of a powerful presence evokes the feeling of safety and protection. A sadist, on the other hand, derives pleasure from playing an authoritative and controlling role. This satises the ego while feeding his or her sexual needs. Spanking is one of the most common and subtle ways to show sadomasochist pleasure. Do you ever wonder why you enjoyed that little surprise beating? Newsweek recently reported on a study which showed how heavy spanking eventually affects a child, making them more likely to coerce their partner into sadomasochistic play later on in life. According to one leading researcher on the subject, “The more children are spanked, the more aggressive they are.” She also noted that they “may learn that sometimes there’s pain and fear involved in loving relationships.” People have died while participating in sadomasochist activity. A Tennessee man was tied up by his wife and gagged with his head wrapped in duct tape, leaving only his nostril slits to breathe through. The authorities said that he was left that way, while his wife spent the night with another man. She returned 20 hours later to nd him dead. Not so sexy anymore, is it? As much as the motto “a whip a day keeps the boredom away” could result in an exciting lifestyle, there are probably less harmful ways to explore one’s sense of adventure. Although, we here at Perdeby never try and prescribe a way of life, so we will let you discover that all by yourselves. Good luck. Image: Gustav Reyneke
Wanneer Bieber-fever`n leefstyl word
MAGDALEEN SNYMAN Jou LO-onderwyser het jou teen dit gewaarsku, jou vriendin se tannie se skoonsuster se dogter se kêrel was in een net voor hy verdwyn het, en daardie meisie met die snaakse hare wat voor jou in die klas sit, moet deel van een wees ... Kultusgroepe is gewoonlik net `n skokkende voorbladstorie in `n random tydskrif. Maar die feit dat hulle werklik bestaan, kan niemand ontken nie. Perdeby het besluit om ondersoek in te stel en `n paar bekende, maar vreemde kultusgroepe te ondersoek.`n Kultusgroep verwys na `n groep mense wie se geloof, gedrag of leefstyl as buitengewoon deur algemene sosiale sirkels bestempel word. `n Mens kan deel wees van `n kultusgroep sonder om dit te besef, maar daar is ook sekere groepe wat met trots verkondig dat hulle kultusgroepe is. Films kan ook `n kultusstatus verkry. Dit gebeur wanneer `n lm `n groep aanhangers het wat baie toegewyd is tot die lm se elemente. Kultus-“classics” is byvoorbeeld A Clockwork Orange
en (natuurlik) Star Wars. Maar kultusgroepe word ook gebasseer op teorieë oor die lewe. Al ooit gewonder hoekom Marilyn Monroe so jonk dood is? Die “Hollywood star whackers”, begin deur `n man genaamd Randy Quaid en sy vrou, glo dat Hollywood sy eie sterre doodmaak deur “star whackers” te gebruik om dit soos `n ongeluk te laat lyk. Heath Ledger se dood was volgens Quaid duidelik nie `n ongeluk nie en hy beweer dat prokureurs en bemarkingspanne agter meer as een ster se vroeë dood sit. Die Quaids erken egter dat hulle sukkel om volgelinge vir hulle kultusgroep te kry. Wie het kos en water nodig as jy vars lug kan inasem? Niemand nie, beweer die “Breatharians” in Amerika. Hulle beweer dat die son se energie (prana, soos hulle dit noem) en lug al is wat mens nodig het om regtig te lewe. Hul leier, Wiley Brooks, het die Breatharian Institute of America gestig en beweer dat hy mense deur middel van Bratharianism kan leer
om `n beter lewe te lei. Verder bied hy ook op sy webwerf vir slegs $10 000 kursusse aan oor die ewige lewe. Mnr. Brooks het baie kritiek uitgelok toe daar onlangs `n foto van hom in `n Amerikaanse tydskrif verskyn het waar hy uit `n winkel stap met `n worsbroodjie eerder as net lekker vars suurstof in sy mond. Die “Cosmic People of Light Powers” mag jou dalk herinner aan `n sci- boek of ses wat jy al gelees het. Die Europese groep glo dat die ruimtewese, Ashtar Sheran, ongeveer tien ruimtetuie het wat om die aarde wentel. Lede glo dat wanneer die aarde tot `n einde kom sal slegs die Cosmic People of Light Powers se volgelinge oorleef deur in die ruimtetuie te klim en iewersheen (wat nog nie bepaal kan word nie) te vlieg. Lede van die groep beweer dat daar honderde of selfs duisende volgelinge regoor die wêreld is. Verder glo hulle dat 95% van die menslike liggaam deur “dark forces” beheer word. As jy hou van huise versier, is die “Panacea Society” vir jou. Die groep besit `n luukse huis in Bedford, `n dorpie in Bedfordshire in Engeland. Hulle glo dat die huis gebou is waar die Tuin van Eden oorspronklik was. Hulle beweer dat wanneer God terugkom aarde toe sal hy na dié huis terugkeer. Die groep hou die erf, wat volgens eiendomsagente miljoene ponde werd is, in stand en hulle hoofdoel is om die huis so mooi as moontlik te laat lyk vir die wederkoms. Meeste mense hou van `n lekker voetmassering, maar vir diegene wat dit `n bietjie verder wil vat is daar “Ho No Hana Sanpogyo”, beter bekend as die voet-lees kultusgroep. Hierdie groep, gelei deur Hogen Fukunaga, lees mense se voete om vas te stel of hulle enige psigiese of siese probleme het. Die groep bestaan al sedert 1987 en Fukunaga beweer hy is die reïnkarnasie van Jesus en Buddah. Die groep het beweer dat hulle op `n stadium 30 000 lede gehad het, maar nadat Fukunaga sowat $900 per voetlesing begin vra het, het getalle drasties afgeneem en moes hy miljoene dollars aan voormalige lede terugbetaal. Die Aniston kultusgroep, wat nooit suksesvol gestig is nie, bewys dat nie net idees of teorieë die inspirasie agter kultusgroepe is nie. Die aktrise Jennifer Aniston het dit op die harde manier geleer nadat `n man genaamd Jason Peyton, haar nie net agtervolg het om `n steelfoto te kry nie, maar selfs van plan was om haar te ontvoer en `n kultusgroep te stig wat haar aanbid. Peyton is egter gevang deur Amerikaanse polisie, gediagnoseer met schizofrenie, en aangeraai om sielkundige hulp te ontvang. Kultusgroepe vorm regoor die wêreld en kan oor enigiets van Justin Bieber se haarstyl tot Einstein se teorieë gaan. Volgens sielkundiges sal mense altyd groepe vorm om die wêreld waarin hulle leef op een of ander manier te verduidelik, juis omdat elkeen se denke so uniek is.In die woorde van Rita Rudner, “I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?” Illustration: Michael Stopforth
8
23 May ‘11
Onder die mes:
Features
Die wonders van plastiese chirurgie verbaas en verbyster
MIGNON PEENS Die hedendaagse kuns van plastiese chirurgie en die gurus wat dit beoefen raak net al hoe meer ekstremisties met die nuwe maltrap prosedures op die mark. Menige mense, soos Hang Mioko wat kookolie in haar gesig ingespuit het toe haar botox opgeraak het, raak verslaaf daaraan om onder die mes te gaan en belemmer sodoende hul hele voorkoms. Die kuns was donkiejare terug heelwat hoiker toe Marilyn Monroe nog die eerste sogenaamde model was. Dit het wel al hoe meer eienaardig geraak,veral as mens modelle soos Lolo Ferrari in ag neem. Sy het `n Guinness wêreldrekord gebreek vir die grootste borste, wat elk 2.8 kilogram weeg. Daar is vandag allerhande plastiese chirurgie prosedures vir omtrent elke liggaamsdeel, en party is eienaardig genoeg om selfs die ingeligtes te verbaas en te verbyster. Beroemde boude soos J-Lo s’n, het die begeerte by mense aangewakker om hulle agterwêreld op te kikker deur prosedures soos anus-bleiking vir `n onooglike rooi sirkel, `n “butt lift” vir hang-boude en inplantings vir platboude te ondergaan. Daar is `n sterk aanvraag na gesplete-ken chirurgie om ontslae te raak van die gleuf in jou ken wat bekend staan as die “butt chin”. Vir mense wat nie kans sien vir oefening om hulle maagvette af te skud nie, is abdomina-etching die chirurgiese oplossing. Abdomina-etching is `n prosedure waar vetafsuiging gebruik word om gleuwe in jou vetlaag uit te keep en sodoende die illusie van `n sixpack te skep. Seksbehepte erotomane ondergaan verskeie onder-diebelt-prosedures. Sodoende word meer plesier tydens seks verskaf en `n aantrekliker geslagtelike voorkoms word bekom deur “vaginoplasty”of penis vergroting, of om`n geslagsverandering te ondergaan. Jou gesig is nie meer die enigste liggaamsdeel wat gelift kan word nie. Mens kry deesdae `n hele “lifts”-lys van liggaamsdele wat hulle kan lig, soos jou knieë, nek, boude, borste, ore en selfs naeltjies. Regstellende-naeltjie-chirurgie is ook `n opsie indien jou naeltjie uitbult in plaas van inkeep. Die populêre en welbekende silikon-inplanting vir die vergroting van borste is ook nie meer die enigste inplanting beskikbaar op die mark nie. Mens kry deesdae allerhande
kunsmatige spiere wat ingeplant kan word, maarwat geen spierkrag byvoeg nie en heeltemal op voorkoms gebasseer is. Die verskillende soorte spierinplantings is as volg: Maagspiere, boudspier, kuitspier, pektorale borsspier, driekopspier (tricep), deltoïedspier en heupspier-inplantings. Dan is dit selfs moontlik om `n kunsmatige iris-inplanting te kry indien jy nog altyd potblou oë wou gehad het. Die ASAPS (American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery) statistieke stipuleer dat plastiese chirurgie in die afgelope veertien jaar met 88% vir mans en met 164% vir vrouens toegeneem het, en dat die mees populêre prosedures in die bedryf die volgende vyf is: Die vergroting van borste, vetafsuiging, ooglid chirurgie, “abdominoplasty” en die verkleining van borste. Goeie nuus vir vampier-fanatikuste – Twilight-onderklere is nie meer die enigste vampier-handelsware op die mark nie, aangesien ons nou die nuwe “Vampire facelift” tot ons beskikking het, waar hulle jou eie bloed in jou gesig inspuit om plooie te vermy. Die televisieprogram Sex and the City het blykbaar groot begeertes by hakskoen-liefhebbers gekweek om voet-chirurgie te ondergaan, sodat hulle met gemak in hoë hakke kan pronk. Voet-chirurgie kom voor in verskeie vorme soos die verkorting van tone en die vernouing van `n breë voet. Proteïne of kollageen kan in die bal van jou voet ingespuit word, wat dien as `n ekstra kussinglagie. Vir die perfekte voet kort jy die perfekte dun enkel, daarom gaan meeste voet-chirurgie gepaard met enkel-vetafsuiging. Perdeby het `n paar Tukkies gaan vra wat hul opinie is oor plastiese chirurgie: Adriaan Bergh, `n vierdejaar Bourekeningkunde student en Mr. Suid-Afrika 2011 sê: “Ek dink regtig dat plastiese chirurgie is `n goeie ding. As jy goed lyk, voel jy goed”. Nicole van Niekerk, `n tweedejaar B.Com Rekeningkunde student het self plastiese chirurgie gehad en sê: “Ek moes `n neusoperasie in hoërskool kry, want ek kon nie meer ruik nie, omdat ek my neus agt keer gebreuk het en nou kan ek ook baie beter asemhaal. Ek voel nie plastiese chirurgie is verkeerd nie, solank jy dit doen vir die regte redes”. Melanie Scheepers, `n eerstejaar Menslikebewegingskunde student, is heeltemal teen plastiese chirurgie, sy sê: “Jou man moet jou maar love nes jy is, want God het jou perfek gemaak.” Dit word deur kundiges aanbeveel dat `n mens twee
keer dink en die risiko’s daaraan verbonde deeglik in ag neem,voordat jy chirugie oorweeg. Jy het nou wel volle beheer oor wat jy aan jou lyf wil doen, maar wees gewaarsku dat daar al menige gevalle was waar mense met hulle hele hart begeer het om `n sekere voorkoms te bekom en dan na die tyd hulle plastiese voorkoms berou het. Image: Esther van Eeden
Internet dating: click-click, I do CHANÈ MACKAY Since the internet transformed the world, millions of cyber-savvy romance seekers have clicked their way to passion, love and even marriage. The idea of ordering a bride online has suffered much ridicule, because many people think of online romances as a last resort for the dysfunctional and the desperate. Stereotypically, individuals and companies involved in advertising and facilitating marriages on online matchmaking websites for a prot were believed to be either extortionists or sexual predators. The online sale of women from poverty stricken countries in Asia and the Soviet Union to afuent white men has fuelled global concerns about human trafcking and the exploitation of desperate individuals. In the past, these concerns and preconceptions were pretty valid. Yet, if the exponential growth-rate of the online dating industry is anything to go by, it seems that the stigma surrounding online romance and the motives that drive it is fading fast. The internet dating industry is currently estimated to be worth around $4 billion and over half a million South Africans registered with online dating services last year, according to web-trafc calculators Comscore and Hitwise. Despite the fact that millions of people worldwide are utilising social networking websites and services, there are no ofcial statistics available regarding the success or failure of relationships that started online, compared with traditional approaches to love and matrimony. Although cyberspace relationship success rates are yet to be established, love stories (both online and traditional) do not always have fairy tale endings. Perdeby found a rather peculiar case of an online dating company that claims to have secured the marriage of a desperate American woman to a Latvian man last year. Mail Order Husbands Inc., is a self-proclaimed spousal-order fullment service that caters for women seeking to purchase a groom from abroad. According to their website (Mailorderhusbands.net)
the services they offer range from “spouse-ordering for women to university diploma-ordering services as well as other services it prefers not to discuss.” Their success stories page describes the match of a 32-year-old American woman who apparently purchased and wed a young Latvian man because of the limited dating prospects in her remote area. The mail order groom is said to have a rough understanding of the English language. According to Mail Order Husbands Inc. the couple are at least both uent in the language of love. Considering the high rate of internet crime and the uncertainty of whether interactions are legitimate and credible, it comes as no surprise that the world of online dating may seem daunting to some. Yet others sing its praises, claiming that it is simple, efcient and allows for social interactions that may not have been available to them before. Chèzne Dowd, a second-year audiology student at Tuks, feels that there is nothing wrong with internet dating, as long as you are able to distinguish between facts and the inventions of other
people’s imagination, otherwise, she says “it can become a tricky situation”. Perdeby asked Margaret Bisschoff, a second-year BCom Law student what she thinks about internet dating in general, she said that “It is the root of all evil and above all that, its just plain sad. If you can’t nd someone who likes you in your own social surroundings with your own social skills, you’re blufng yourself in thinking you will nd it on the internet.” Mia Ungerer, a second-year BCom Accounting student said, “Internet dating: I tried and tested it, it was stupid. It gives false impressions about a person”. Joe Tracy, publisher of Online Dating Magazine and author of 10 Essential Online Dating Tips, argues that you’ll increase your chances of nding that special someone and eventually becoming one of the tens of thousands of people that marry a year because they met their soul mate online.” According to the Microsoft Safety and Security Centre: “The growing popularity of social sites increases the risks them being used by hackers, spammers, virus writers, identity thieves, and other criminals follow the trafc.” Microsoft.com offers various tips and articles on how to use the internet safely. As it is often difcult to establish whether the information in online proles is accurate, authorities stress the importance of keeping information like banking details and physical address private. Internet users, especially children, are encouraged to exercise caution when arranging to meet with people they have only communicated with online – you never know whether cheerleader746 is actually a middle-aged man with closet fetishes or whether Nice_Guy11 is really an online predator looking to extort money or lure victims into situations that may lead to sexual assault. Even though internet dating is not traditional, it has worked for some people and they did nd the love of their lives on the internet. If you are in a hurry to nd your true love, it might be your only option. Perdeby just want you be smart about it, keep an open mind and be careful not to nd yourself in a messy situation. Image: Ezelle van der Heever
Entertainment
23 May ‘11
Spinnerakke en mantels:
9
die superhelde is terug
ANDRI NEL Stywe lycra pakkies, super-menslike kragte en `n dodelike geheim wat sy einde kan beteken. Nee, dit is nie Usain Bolt met `n geskeurde liesspier nie. Dit is daardie geheime plesier wat ouens en meisies terselfde tyd na die teaters lok. Superhelde is nie meer net vir die outjie met die dik raam brille in die strokiesboek-afdeling van Exclusive Books nie, en as dit kom by Superman en Spiderman is daar geen twyfel dat superhelde ons antwoord is op die goed wat die sleg oorwin nie. Met die toeloop van nuwe superheld lms wat ons silwerdoeke binne die volgende jaar tref is die vraag op baie se lippe, “Waarom alweer Superman en Spiderman?” Albei hierdie superhelde gaan binne die volgende twee jaar `n herlewings transformasie ondergaan met The Amazing Spiderman wat geskeduleer is om in Julie 2012 te begin draai en Superman: The Man of Steel wat in Desember 2012 weer sy verskyning maak. Dit mag jou so bietjie met `n gevoel van déjà vu los. Het daar dan nie net so paar jaar terug beide Superman en Spiderman lms uitgekom nie, en het beide nie so goed gevaar in die kritici en aanhangers se oë nie? Maar volgens kritici en die opgewonde gebabbel op lm webtuistes, mag dié dalk net die keurpunt wees wat hierdie twee lm reekse nodig het. Die titels van die nuwe weergawes gee al klaar `n meer klassieke klank aan die lms en met twee Britse akteurs wat hierdie gewilde Amerikaanse superhelde vertolk, mag ons dalk net in wees vir `n
nuwe manier van die toekoms en die aarde red. The Social Network se Andrew Gareld sal die rol van Spiderman vertolk en The Tudors ster Henry Cavill sal in die rooi en blou Superman pakkie te siene wees. Alhoewel daar `n paar tonge klap oor die feit dat hierdie Amerikaanse superhelde deur Britse akteurs vertolk word, word daar net goeie dinge van die regisseurs se kant af gesê. “Gareld het die perfekte kombinasie van intelligensie, vernuf en menslikheid,” sê regiseur Marc Webb op die webtuiste Deadline.com. The Amazing Spiderman sal meer van `n terugblik op die lewe van Spiderman se alter-ego Peter Parker wees, en hou glad nie verband met die vorige drie lms waarin Toby Maguire die hoofrol speel nie. Die laat-jou-lê-soos-jy-lag ster Emma Stone sal die superheld se liefdesbelangstelling speel, maar nie as die rooikop Mary Jane Watson nie – eerder, tot baie aanhangers van die strokiesprente se blydskap, as die blonde Gwen Stacy. Vir die van ons wat nie die kleurvolle strokiesprent blaaie van voor tot agter ken nie: Gwen Stacy was Spiderman se heel eerste liefde, en baie aanhangers meen sy ware liefde, maar sterf `n tragiese dood waarna Spiderman en Mary Jane vertroosting in mekaar se arms vind. Hierdie is `n baie interessante kinkel in die storie en sal vir beide geharde Spiderman aanhangers en die wat hoop vir iets anders, iets gee om na uit te sien. Die suksesvolle regisseur van die nuwe Batman reeks, Christopher Nolan, sal as vervaardiger intree op Superman: Man of Steel. Hy word daarvoor geakkrediteer dat hy die Batman reeks nuwe lewe gegee het. Nou is die vraag: kan hy dieselfde doen met
die man van staal? Die storielyn is nog nie bekend gemaak nie, maar een ding is verseker – dit gaan iets vir die oog met Cavill in die hoofrol wees. Hierdie koninklike ster staan al bekend as die ongelukkigste akteur in Hollywood. Natuurlik het hy sy merk as die aantreklike Charles Brandon gemaak in die gewilde The Tudors reeks, maar hy het ook al vele kere uitgemis daarop om in die superskoene van `n superheld in te tree. Nie net het hy die rol van Superman/Clark Kent afgestaan aan Brendon Routh in die 2007 se onsuksesvolle weergawe van Superman, Superman Returns nie, maar hy het ook tweede in die tou gestaan toe dit by die rol van Batman kom, wat aan Christian Bale gegaan het. Ten spyte van die kritiek oor Britse akteurs wat die hoofrolle vertolk en die feit dat sommiges voel dat dit te vroeg is om alweer `n nuwe Superman en Spiderman lm uit te bring, is daar ook baie opgewondenheid. Dalk is dit die keurpunt in die dip waardeur beide hierdie superhelde se lm loopbaan gaan, en dalk is die toetrede van so biedjie nuwe, Engelse bloed net wat die gemaskerde manne nodig het. Dit was die vars vertolking van die Walliese akteur Christian Bale as Batman wat dié reeks een van die suksesvolste ter wêreld gemaak het. Nou is dit Gareld en Cavill se kanse om te wys dat die aarde steeds deur `n paar baie aantreklike bleeksiele gered kan word. Die afwagting is groot, maar ons kan net hoop dat hierdie twee lms se klassieke titels oorgedra sal word na `n klassieke herlewing van die web-skietende Spidey en die manteldraende Superman.
Beeld: JP Nathrass
A series of fortunate events KIRSTI BUICK
Before you begin to sink into the exam-induced winter coma, think again. It turns out that the dreariest part of the year may not be so dreary after all. How is this possible, you ask? Well, a series of very fortunate events is heading our way. It seems the stars, planets and tour dates have aligned to bring us Chris Martin, Kylie and a host of other glorious things to brighten up the winter months. Jesus Christ Superstar: Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Broadway classic begins its run at Montecasino’s Teatro on 3 June and the nal curtain call will take place on 26 June. The production features a cast of local favourites, including Wonderboom front man Cito as Jesus. Tickets start at just R100, going up to R365. You can afford this one. Kylie Minoque’s Aphrodite – Les Folies Tour: It seems that the 40-something Aussie pop star will be spinning around the Sun City Super Bowl on 8 and 9 July in her rst ever local performance. This one’s pretty pricey though. Tickets start at R466 and go up to almost two grand. But Kylie’s worth it, right? James Blunt’s Some Kind of Trouble Tour: Panties at the ready, ladies. If you’re a James Blunt fan, 26 August promises to be a good day for you: the Grammy Award-winning crooner is set to perform at the Coca-Cola Dome in Joburg. Tickets are priced from R272 to R529. Riverdance: If you’re into lots of jumping and Celtic rock, this one’s for you. The Irish sensation is set to do some damage to the Teatro stage at Montecasino from 27 September to 9 October. Tickets start at R221, but you can pay R374 for front and centre. Just watch out for ying chunks of stage.
Coldplay at Joburg’s FNB Stadium: Yet another massive international act to grace our humble shores. On 8 October, Chris Martin and the gang are set to ll up the enormous Soccer City – sorry, ahem, FNB Stadium – on the local leg of their 2011
worldwide tour. Which is probably the most exciting thing to happen there since ... Bono. Nevertheless, tickets range from R265 to R665; not bad, considering that one had to pay about R1000 to see the back of Bono’s head. John Cleese’s Alimony Tour: From 25 to 29 October, “the Guv” himself will be gracing Montecasino’s Teatro on the local leg of his 2011 comedy tour. The Alimony Tour, so named as a tribute to the £12 million he recently paid his ex-wife in alimony, has received rave reviews the world over. “I get angry that I have to pack my trunk just to make money,” said Cleese recently. “That I, at my age, would have to plan my life anew to pay her all the money she is to get for seven years – well, it irritates me. I’d rather have been drinking coffee, reading books and writing.” Tickets range from R295 to R500. No, it’s not cheap, but have a heart – the poor guy’s probably broke. Kings of Leon at Joburg’s FNB Stadium: Yes, this is old news. But the whole “we’re coming, no we’re not – surprise! – yes we are!” thing was a great way to build suspense. Sneaky devils. The band is set to (nally) appear at the FNB Stadium on 29 October (as far as we know). You probably bought your ticket a year ago. If not, there are still some tickets available in selected seated areas for R390. Jimmy Carr’s Laughter Therapy: If the prospect of December holidays is not enough reason for euphoria, British funny man Jimmy Carr may be able to help you out. On 10 December at the Sandton Convention Centre, Carr will showcase his characteristic dead-pan humour. Tickets start at R263, peaking at R568. Illustration : Michael Stopforth
10
Entertainment
23 May ‘11
Rad!
Sad!
A memo on memes
LISA DE KLERK The internet is now one of the main ways of curing boredom. Entire websites exist solely for providing users with images, gifs or videos that will make them laugh, cringe or otherwise add to their muchvaried repertoire of internet catch phrases and cultural concepts. These concepts gain popularity from being shared on blogs, emails and social networking sites. Thus, “internet memes” are born. This week, Perdeby braved the blogosphere to determine your Rad vs Sad. RAD! Demotivational posters. These spoofs of motivational posters have been doing the rounds since 1998. The posters typically depict a centred image, bordered in black, with a title written in capital letters and a witty tagline below. Originally credited to the web company Despair Inc., internet users adopted the concept and began churning out their own versions by the thousands. They’re designed to weaken self-esteem or discourage moral strength ... in a, er, funny way. Despair Inc. (and various other websites) now provide a Demotivator Generator on their web page, as well as demotivational videos and T-shirts. In case you’re still lost, a model example of a demotivator features an image of Snookie from MTV’s Jersey Shore with the caption: “White trash ... now comes in orange.” Sad Panda. If you haven’t read or heard the words “this makes me a sad panda”, then you’ve probably been living under a rock. The phrase dates all the way back to a 1999 episode of South Park, in which Mr Garrison’s class is introduced to Sexual Harassment Panda. Whenever Sexual Harassment Panda describes incidents of sexual harassment, he emphatically declares why this makes him a “sad panda”. These days, anything from failing an exam to being out of milk constitutes being a “sad panda” on social networking sites such as Twitter and Facebook. The catch phrase has even leaked into demotivational posters, and it seems every panda captured on lm acquires a “sad panda” caption once it hits the net. At least these adorable endangered bears are getting some viral attention.
Rad vs Sad Perdeby epic win!
Now, let’s see what we can do for “sad Arakan Forest Turtle”. Charlie Sheen rant. After Two and a Half Men actor Charlie Sheen’s infamous radio and television interviews in late February 2011, cyberspace exploded with parodies and images containing some of his controversial comments. Sheen went so far as to call the show a “pukefest that everyone worships”, and denounced Alcoholics Anonymous. The actor is notoriously struggling with substance abuse, and the followup interviews only led him further downhill. After joining Twitter on 1 March, phrases such as “tigerblood” and “winning!” started trending. Now YouTube is abuzz with remixes and parodies of the interviews (there’s even a dubstep version) and jokes ood emails, status updates and even previously established memes. If this isn’t enough, there’s a website that generates a new Sheen quote every time you refresh it – LiveTheSheenDream. com. Winning!
SAD! Rebecca Black’s “Friday”. Amateur YouTube musician, Rebecca Black, currently holds the record for the most dislikes on a viral video for her single “Friday”. That would be 2 750 237 dislikes. Just to put things into perspective, Justin Bieber’s “Baby” stands at 1 353 048 dislikes. The 13-year-old’s mother paid ARK Music Factory for a song recording and an accompanying video. The recording label made mince meat out of Black’s voice by overusing the pitch-correcting software Auto-Tune, and further destroyed her life by making her sing Patrice Wilson’s lyrics. Huh? Patrice who? The “rapper” in the Friday video. Yes, an adult is responsible for writing: “Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday / Today it is Friday, Friday / ... / Tomorrow is Saturday / And Sunday comes afterward.” The reaction that followed after the video turned viral was intense. Black has repeatedly complained about “cyber-bullying” and death threats. Groups
have cropped up on Facebook thanking Black for teaching them the “days of the week”, even singling out the unidentied co-stars in the video as “that awkward dancing girl” or “the twelve-yearold who stole a convertible to pick up Rebecca Black on Friday”. The music industry has also reacted. A clip surfaced on the net of Katy Perry cheekily covering “Friday” at one of her shows, counting “fun, fun, fun, fun” off on her ngers. YouTube parodies include the disturbing “Friday in Hell” remix, in which Black’s voice is extremely slowed down and the images freakishly distorted, and “Sunday”, which was created by the Community Christian Church in Illinois and features the pastor’s daughter, Sadie B. All Perdeby can say is: it’s a blessing that that little girl’s parents thought to disable comments – Rebecca has been made an example of. LOL Cats. It’s unclear exactly how long LOL Cats have been roaming the internet, but what is clear is that they’re getting old. Yes, cats are adorable. No, you do not need to take a photo of your cat every time it leaps in the air, sleeps, eats, sits on something or looks adorable; and caption it. You don’t need to dress up your poor cat or stick a beer can between their paws for the purpose of humiliating them on the internet. It’s also become clear that LOL Cats generators think cats can’t spell or that they speak as if they are mentally-impaired: “Hy cann has foodz?” or “Waayt! Hugz befo you go?” Enough said. Trolling. Trolling is when a person states something on a social-network platform with the sole intention of stirring up controversy or annoying others. Seasoned networkers will recognise a troll and avoid responding because trolls thrive on angry reactions. Trolls will even use poor grammar and spelling just to provoke a dispute. An illustrated “troll face” is now also part of the game and is used in many comics and mash-ups. If you’re wondering why anyone would want to be a troll, what pleasure they derive from trolling, or why people enjoy manipulating the emotions of complete strangers – so are we. Though memes are born from “wasting time”, this is the epitome of time wasting. Image: Mpho Tsuari
Holiday Murray: folk vibes uit Kaapstad
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and Bend” en “Jirey” wat effens vinniger is en meer energie bevat. Oor die algemeen blyk Holiday Murray om meer in die rustige musiek in te wees as die energieke, springdie-hele-verhoog-vol tipe musiek. Daar is duidelike folk invloede van kunstenaars soos Damien Rice (net baie meer gelukkig oor die lewe) te vinde in Holiday Murray se 10-lied debuutalbum. As jy `n aanhanger is van folk musiek oor die algemeen, is die kans goed dat jy gek gaan wees oor Holiday Murray se debuutalbum en heel moontlik die album herhaadelik luister. Beeld voorsien
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Holiday Murray is die debuutalbum van Kaapse folk-rock groep, Holiday Murray. Soos wat debuutalbums gaan, het Holiday Murray hul uitstekend van hul taak gekwyt. Die kitaar harmonieë en lirieke te vinde op die album neem jou op `n emosionele en musikale reis wat sal verseker dat hierdie album `n permanente plek op die playlist van jou lewe verower. Die eerste ding wat opgemerk word wanneer Holiday Murray se folk musiek op jou oordromme los gelaat word, is dat dit die
tipe rustige musiek is wat veroorsaak dat jou liggaam onwillekeurig van kant na kant wieg. Dit is egter nie al wat Holiday Murray so ‘n plesier maak om na te luister nie. Die liriese inhoud van liedjies soos “The Sea Finds Me”, “Homeless and Happy” en “The Woods” is uitstekend en dit is duidelik opmerkbaar dat daar baie moeite en kreatiwiteit in die skryfproses ingegaan het. Holiday Murray se musiek is daardie tipiese musiek wat mens luister as jy rustig agter oor sit met `n glas wyn in die hand, terwyl jy jou lewe kontempleer. Daar is egter `n paar liedjies, insluitende “Buckle
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CHRIS VAN DER MERWE
Sport
23 May ‘11
11
Running free: possible new Tuks sport
KEVIN VAN DER LIST TuksSport could soon be another sport richer with the inclusion of free running and parkour. An application has been submitted to TuksSport to include free funning and parkour as an official TuksSport. For the application to be successfully approved as a TuksSport, it needs a membership of at least 60 members, which it has. According to Simeon du Preez, a second-year civil engineering Student, the application is being processed. Free running and parkour involve getting from one obstacle to the next by using
natural movement, according to Kenji Marapa, a third-year BIS Publishing student and participant in the sport for two years. The sport originated abroad in France and it is huge in Europe, the Middle East, the UK and the US. South Africa’s version of Parkour started eight years ago in Pretoria. The sport is growing rapidly in South Africa and now has a bigger viewership than actual participants. Free running and parkour might seem to be the same thing to many people who first witness the sport, but there are indeed differences between the two. According to du Preez, free running uses flare to overcome obstacles whereas parkour is
aimed at getting from point A to point B in the quickest possible time. Du Preez also said you need to be equipped with a bigger build when doing parkour. The sport is comprised of jumping, running, climbing and flipping from one obstacle to the next. While most of us will be too afraid to attempt some of the daring stunts committed by these sport participants, they are not fazed by the dangers involved. “It’s mostly in the mind. It feels good to navigate through objects. You’re always progressing with parkour,” said Marapa. Marapa enjoys the “incredible rush” and adrenaline that the sport offers. Du Preez feels that if you know and stick to
your limits and have no doubts during the stunts it won’t be that dangerous for you to attempt them. These daring stunts require a degree of physical conditioning which is worked on at the gym or by means of running and pullups. Although the sport is still relatively small in South Africa compared with overseas, there is a competition held every two months in Johannesburg called Urban Session. According to Marapa it’s easy to get involved in the sport: all you need is a pair of shoes and the will to do it. Photo: Archives
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Another one wheel adventure MATT MILTON Doing what seems to be impossible to others has become a career for former Tuks student Christo Coetzer. On 28 March Coetzer embarked on an expedition to circumnavigate the Jamaican coastline on a unicycle. “It was a challenge on a much larger scale,” said Coetzer when comparing it to his journey around Mauritius last year. Coetzer was accompanied by his father Theo and a local photographer throughout the entire journey. From the onset of the project Coetzer and his father were faced with challenges ranging from transport to accommodation. When the decision was made to go to Jamaica they did not even have the means to get there until a friend sponsored their air tickets. On the day of their departure from the Bob Marley Museum, Coetzer, fitted with the Jamaican Olympic cycling kit, was the only person on their team with a wheel roll on. It was through the generosity of one of the locals that a vehicle was sponsored to transport their equipment and supplies. Due to the condition of the roads, they were often forced to use routes unfamiliar to the locals and to travel in areas uninhabited by humans. “You can’t prepare for everything,” Coetzer reflected. The adventurers awoke each morning not knowing what lay ahead on the terrain they were about to enter. They also didn’t know where they were to sleep each night. Before embarking on their journey, the Coetzers did a topographical scan of the island with the aid of Google Earth and various maps in order to plan their route. Coetzer himself had to go through rigorous training in the six months leading up to his departure. The training consisted of two sessions a day five days a week, long distance cycling in the morning and strength training in the afternoon. “It was a much bigger physical challenge than anything I’ve ever done in my life,” admits Coetzer. The same schedule Coetzer used in training was used on the actual journey, which was a counter-clockwise circuit around the island. Coetzer cycled on Mondays through Wednesdays and on Fridays and Saturdays. He used his off days to explore the island. Coetzer cycled for seven to nine hours each day, covering distances ranging from 65 to
80 km: a task he described as “an epic journey around the island”. The island consists of mountains, wide open countryside and a tropical rainforest skirting the ocean. The main road was riddled with potholes. According to Coetzer, “the roads are horrific to say the least”. The environment was constantly changing as they travelled and in one such instance a 16km uphill climb suddenly became a wildlife park. The trip had special significance for Coetzer as it had always been his dream to visit the island. This was amplified by the association the locals made between him and Peter Tosh who was also a unicyclist and an original member of The Wailers. During his travels on the island, people kept
singing the song One Wheel Wheelie by Early B wherever he went. Coetzer, who had never heard it before, only there discovered that the song was about a man unicycling around Jamaica. This trip confirmed to Coetzer that he had found his calling. “Every time you go it’s not like it’s gonna quench your thirst,” explains Coetzer. “It sort of goes and builds a bigger hunger within yourself.” Being an adventurerer has become Coetzer’s life and he will overcome whatever odds to continue to follow his dreams. “If you have the courage to do that, it will lead to a much better future for yourself and for people in general,” believes Coetzer. Photo provdided
SA krieketspelers vaar goed oorsee COBUS COETZEE AJ Pienaar, beter bekend as Obus onder sy Vrystaatse Chevrolet Knights-spanmaats, is net een van die talle SuidAfrikaners wat op die oomblik oorsee hul staal met bal en kolf op die krieketveld wys. Pienaar het sy landgenoot, AB de Villiers, se rekord aan flarde gekolf nadat hy 244 van slegs 114 balle vir sy Ierse krieketklub Waringstown teen CIYMS op The Lawn krieketveld gemoker het. Sy klub se webtuiste berig dat hierdie spesifieke veld een van die grootste krieketvelde is, maar dat Pienaar dit sommer klein laat lyk het. Dit is die hoogste telling nog in die Northern Cricket Union, en het De Villiers se voormalige rekord van 233, wat hy in 2004 vir Carrickfergus teen Cliftonville aangeteken het, oortref. Die 21-jarige Pienaar se kolfbeurt het 22 sesse en 13 viere ingesluit, en hy het sy dubbele honderdtal van slegs 96 aflewerings behaal. Hoewel sy klub, die Villagers, net 374 vir 6 in hul toegelate 50 boulbeurte kon aanteken, is die besoekende span met 18 lopies beboet vir stadige boulwerk. Die webtuiste berig dat dit waarskynlik van al die balle is wat hulle op die aangrensende veld moes gaan soek. Dit het aan CIYMS `n teiken van 393 gestel om te wen. CIYMS kon daarna `n skamele 146 lopies behaal. Pienaar het in onlangse wedstryde teen die Instonians 81 lopies aangeteken, en `n onoorwonne 135 in 70 balle teen YMCA. Bo en behalwe sy goeie kolfvermoë en vorm, is hy ook een
van sy klub se staatmaker-boulers. Hierdie veelsydige speler is vir groot dinge bestem, berig die Villigers se webtuiste. Pienaar is `n voormalige Suid-Afrikaanse o.19-speler. Dit is egter nie net in Ierland waar Suid-Afrikaners goed presteer nie. Die 4de Indiese Premier Liga (IPL) is tans aan die gang en staan einde se kant toe. Al die wedstryde is gespeel behalwe die finaal. Beide die Morkel-broers vaar goed met die bal in vanjaar se IPL. Albie Morkel is tans die beste Suid-Afrikaanse bouler met 14 paaltjies in die toernooi vir die Chennai Super Kings, en is ook onlangs as sy Suid-Afrikaanse tuisspan, die Northern Titans, se speler van die jaar aangewys. Sy broer, Morne Morkel, volg kort op sy hakke met 13 paaltjies vir die Delhi Daredevils. Dale Steyn, wat vir die Deccan Chargers speel, het al 13 kolwers terug pawiljoen toe gestuur gedurende die toernooi. Jacques Kallis is op sy stukke met die kolf, en het al 358 lopies vir die Kolkata Knight Riders geslaan, wat onder andere drie vyftigtalle insluit. Sy veilige hande het ook al nege vangskote raakgevang, die meeste van enige speler in die toernooi sover. AB de Villiers het al 262 lopies vir die Royal Challengers Bangalore aangeteken. Die Chennai Super Kings was teen druktyd bo aan die punteleer met nege oorwinnings van 13 wedstryde. Die finaal van die Twintig20 IPL reeks sal op 28 Mei gespeel word om 16:30 Suid Afrikaanse tyd. Suid-Afrikaners kan hulself vir klipharde krieket later vanjaar gereed maak wanneer Australië en Sri Lanka na Suid-Afrika in Oktober en Desember onderskeidelik toer. Foto: belfasttelegraph.co.uk
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