Nucleus vol 2, no 2

Wake Me Never How to be Happy in One Day The Sociology of Happiness and COntentment American Hustle

Happiness Issue

EDITORS Bridgette Glover Alana Young Jessica Kelley

COVER ART MODEL Hanna Gilmour

CONTRIBUTRS Dr Chris Fellows John Drake Tony Lynch Hoi Sin Belinda Marsh Helen Taylor Chloe Delaney Colin Hargreaves Josh Osborne Rach Hopkins Katie Host Stu Horsfield Diana Cowie Louise Young Raelene Hunt Ashley Pianca Elise Mottley Kate Wood Judd Newton

Contents Volume 2, Issue 2, March 2014 3 - Editorial 3 - UNESA President’s Report 4 - Letters to the Editors 5 - What’s Happenin’ Hot Stuff?

6 - News 8 - The Happiest Emotion 9 - The Different Forms of Happiness 10 - We Need Feminism Because . . .

11 - How to be Happy in One Day 12 - Some Thoughts on the UNESA Constitution 13 - In Defence of the Constitution...(and a response to the attacks on the UNESA Board) 14 - O-Week Recap 16 - Wake Me Never 17 - How I Would Redo My Fresher Year 18 - Staff Profile: Dr Jordan McKenzie 19 - Graduate Profile: Diana Cowie 20 - The Politics of Climate Change 22 - Rainbow White Chocolate Coconut Passionfruit Cheesecake 23 - In Those We Trust

IN-OFFICE COFFEE COUNT 33

24 - Jumper-ing for Joy! Or, how to make adorable jumpers for Penguins 25 - Movie Review: American Hustle 26 - The Adventures of Arabella Henderson - Episode 4: Reading the Riot Act 27 - See Ya Sam Carter!

27 - Words with Judd

CONTACT US

Visit www.nucleus.org.au Or write to us at editors@nucleus.org.au Come and see us at the office in the Union Courtyard, across from Campus Essentials.

We’re always happy to get new writers and artists on board, so send us an email for more information, or send us some of your work if you have it ready! We look forward to hearing from you!

PUBLISHING SCHEDULE Nucleus is published monthly. The submission deadline is the first day of the month of issue. Issues may have a theme, but these are never exclusive — all content is welcome!

UPCOMING THEMES April — SPACE May — ? Vote at www.fb.com/NucleusUNE

DISCLAIMER The opinions expressed in this publication do not necessarily reflect those of the staff of Nucleus or UNESA. If you have an issue with an 2

item published in the paper, write a letter and we will be glad to print it. All contributions must include name and contact details. Ensure that all contributions contain nothing that may be considered sexist, racist, discriminatory, violence provoking, or plagiarised. We assume our readers can tolerate a degree of satire and the odd swear word, but anything containing unnecessary profanity will not be published.

Publication is always at the discretion of the editors.

All content is published under the Creative Commons By 3.0 license. Refer to website for license information.

EDITORIAL H

ey there true believers! Welcome to the second issue of Nucleus 2014!

Our second month of being your editors has proven to be just as much the bomb-diggity as the first, if not more so, what with eager new contributors, even more chocolate, and slightly (only slightly) more knowledge about working Photoshop.

Inside our Happiness issue you’ll find a collection of answers to a question we hounded poor unexpecting students with: ‘What makes you happy?’ There’s an easy guide to becoming happy in just one day, a review of American Hustle, tips for all our insomniac readers, and why exactly the world needs feminism. There’s also a series of opinion pieces looking at UNESA from different points of view. And why don’t you make the delectable Rainbow White Chocolate Coconut Passionfruit Cheesecake – it’s the perfect treat to accompany reading this issue!

While we’ve got your attention, we’d like to make a few apologies about our f*!k ups in the last issue. To Jessie Willcox (spelt with one l in Feb); to Monica Fortunaso (for not getting credited for your fab article), to the Coffee Count (for missing an f – clearly we hadn’t had enough coffee) and to Ms Wen Liu. In last month’s issue we printed the winning entries of the UNE International Writing Prize. However, the name of one of the authors was misspelt: this sentence should read “Wen Liu won the News Articles/Social Issues category with her entry ‘Culture Policy on Tourist Areas’.” Nucleus would like to apologise to Ms Wen Liu for this mistake. Sometimes we’re idiots.

Until April, where we’ll see you in space!

Alana, Bridgette and Jessie.

P.S. Please enjoy these dorky photos of what makes each of us happy.

Reading Penguins, smiling, and pointing!

Drinking coffee in a galaxy far, far away!

- Bridgette

- Alana

UNESA President’s Report

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he campus experience is off to a great start this year - with continuing students back wandering around and talking to people, it is a different vibe. Trimester 3 is a long slog with limited students on campus, although the library and courtyards saw some students to ensure that light at the end of the trimester 3 on-campus tunnel was bright. Membership of UNESA now totals almost 5,000, an indication of the value students place on services, amenity and advocacy. The Board welcomes new members and takes seriously the respect and responsibility for the student voice.

The UNE Student Association has continued to progress its work with independent advocacy and I would like to welcome Tom and Jade to the team.

Tom and Jade have been thrown in at the deep end with their start coinciding with orientation and first week of lectures. At the start of trimester one, the independent advocacy was rebranded to Uni4Me; all the same services are on offer and will continue to provide and address problems that UNE students may be facing, be they part time, full time, internal, international, college or distance students. Uni4Me can individually help UNE students by providing a confidential and sympathetic hearing for any concerns you may have. The Uni4me Advocacy Service offers independent information, advocacy and referral across a range of academic and personal issues. All advice is free and confidential.

Tune FM by all accounts is going strong with over 80 volunteers regularly contributing to station content and operations. The radio station continues to sort through and catalogue the mountain of music history that is the legacy of 40 years of operation. The team will be working on some interesting projects this year. My vintage gives away an interest in the archive music being bought to life if I can nudge an idea forward.

Playing PS3 in my pyjamas and not brushing my hair!

- Jessie

The last issue of Nucleus was a different flavor and gave an indication of the character of the new editors. Bridgette, Alana and Jessica are to be congratulated for the time and effort spent crafting the 2014 generation of Nucleus. It was great to see staff and students alike collecting and reading the issue when it hit the stand.

UNESA welcomes the move by Council to appoint Professor Annabelle Duncan the interim Vice Chancellor (VC, to replace Jim Barber on his resignation. The appointment means that the limbo between Jim and the appointment of a new VC is alleviated and Annabelle can ensure that UNE moves forward in that time. The board will be looking forward to an opportunity to meet with Professor Duncan and explore ways that UNESA can build stronger relationships and partner with UNE to extend amenity and service to all our students.

I was disappointed to read the less-than-subtle message in “Letters to the Editors” from Jim Barber. I would like to think that Professor Barber’s letter was at best a flippant crack at Sarita, which he might have thought better of at another time.

The Student Association has met some very sturdy challenges in its journey to be part of the student voice at UNE. Despite some stiff opposition and often a series of ridge lines to climb, the Student Association has achieved a credible existence at this institution something students and the board should be proud of. Over the period of UNESA’s short existence, the critics have at various times have tried to mire UNESA in the cesspool of despair. UNESA is a testament to those students who value the university experience as something more than credentialing.

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The document Prof Blass circulated was a ridiculous document worthy of spirited mockery. Ms Perston’s criticism of it was about as harsh as a lashing with a wet noodle. Most of the juicier bits were direct quotes from submissions made by irate academics. The fact that an authority figure such as Professor Barber would chose to upbraid Ms Perston for such mild criticism is distressing.

I am hopeful of a more open atmosphere of dialogue in the shortterm future, considering the graduation address I quoted above was given by Professor Anabelle Duncan, our interim Vice-Chancellor.

— Dr Chris Fellows Senior Lecturer in Chemistry School of Science and Technology, The University of New England

This Month…

Our Happiness theme is in honour of the International Day of Happiness, but there are also a few other things happening in March: 8 — International Women’s Day 13–16 — Formula 1 Grand Prix 14–17 — Autumn Festival (Armidale) 15 — March in March (Armidale) 20 — International Day of Happiness 21 — UNE Graduation Day (Arts; Humanities; Behavioural, Cognitive and Social Sciences Awards) 21 — World Poetry Day 21 — International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination 21 — World Down Syndrome Day 22 — World Water Day 22 — UNE Graduation Day (Law; UNE Business Awards) 23 — World Meteorological Day 26 — Melbourne International Comedy Festival (till 20 April) 27 — Comet Holmes (17P/Holmes) will reach perihelion.

28 — UNE Graduation Day (Education Awards) 29 — UNE Graduation Day (Sciences; Health; Medicine Awards) 4

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The outgoing Vice-Chancellor’s letter in the February 2014 Nucleus chiding outgoing Editor Sarita Perston for the content of her article“LIH: Look, I’m Here!” was a depressing manifestation of this culture of silence.

It is not a question of anyone being ‘unable or unwilling to engage with the merits of the case for and against the restructure of the LIH dispatch office’: the focus of Ms Perston’s criticisms was the digression made by Professor Blass into assessment methods in the ‘consultation document’, a digression which betrayed a terrifying cluelessness about the purpose of a university and the environment in which UNE operates.

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I was recently browsing the internet and found the following, from a graduation address given at Murdoch University in 2005: “I am concerned about the current culture, the culture of silence or of speaking up only to tell people what they want to hear.

Of shooting the messenger or even worse, of considering those who disagree as the enemy. … In many of our iconic organizations there is a suggestion that dialogue is not welcome, that one accepts the views of a senior manager and obeys.”

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Dear Editors,

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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR 2 1

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Sausage sandwich!

Dear Editors,

I’m an external student at UNE—since 2006. As a result, I was very interested in a story on Trimesters in the February edition of Nucleus 2013. It wasn’t the story about trimesters itself but the references to the retention rate of externals. The story was

by Elsie Baker.

On page 7 she says that “less than 40% of external students complete their degrees.” She talks about attrition after trimesters were introduced on page 9. On page 15 of the Council Minutes of 6 December 2013, the Vice Chancellor seemed to be concerned about the retention rate of externals at UNE. I’ve contacted Corporate Intelligence at UNE—they collect all sorts of statistics—but I was told by the relevant Director that they did not collect retention rate statistics. One of the reasons given was that some degrees might take 10 years. My reply was that if a student does not continue to study in their course in a trimester, they are required to explain—policy.

If they give no explanation, I assume they are considered to have ceased their course. Record is also kept of how long a student has been studying, that is, if they have reached their 10-year limit (if that limit applies to their particular course). So it would appear easy to collect retention rates for internals and externals over the years.

My concern led to me contact the student representatives on the Academic Board and my email also went on to the Academic Board itself.

The representatives did not get back to me or the Board but time may tell. My question was asking whether anything academically can be done to improve the retention of external students. After all, external students make up about 80% of the student population. The retention rate for internals is better than for externals.

I’ve gone as far as I can go, so I’ve written this short piece. Hopefully, something can be done to assist all our fellow students complete their courses at UNE. — John Drake

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Dear Editors, Universities exist to encourage critical reflection, and without such reflection they do not exist.

With this truth in mind, the really depressing aspect of Jim Barber’s letter in the February 2014 edition of Nucleus is that no-one doubts he did actually write it.

— Tony Lynch

Have something to say? A rant, a compliment, a complaint, an idle thought? We want to hear it! Send your letter to editors@nucleus.org.au or come and see us in our office and grab a Fantail while you’re there!

What’s Happenin’ Hot Stuff?* Anti-Ageing Tonic at NERAM! Ageing Artfully

New Art Exhibitions at NERAM! - Art Relay - Pass-it-on - B.C. (before computers) - Aunty May Hinch & Leonie Binge: Strong Women Strong Will

Fabulous Fashionistas!

Pop-up Choir Musical Cocktails (no, not THAT type of cocktail!)

Dance up a Storm

@ NERAM - New England Regional Art Museum All open on 21 March All welcome!

@ NERAM 16 March All activities are FREE!

March in March Peaceful rally to demonstrate a vote of no confidence in the Abbott government @ Central Park 15 March 2 pm All welcome!

Dementia and Disability Symposium 7th April 9:30am-4pm NSW Parliament House, Sydney www.une.edu.au/connect/events/events/symposiumdementia-and-disability

Arts in the Pub Series

UNE’s Minds Matter Conference

@ The White Bull Every month

Aanuka Resort, Coffs Harbour 3-5 April

Don’t miss next month:

Check it out on UNE’s website for more info

Claire Ferguson

Grad

& John Scott 1st April

Friday 21 March Saturday 22 March Friday 28 March Saturday 29 March @ Boolomimbah

*Obviously a reference to classic film Sixteen Candles (1984)

DESIGN PRINT POST freecall 1300 853 700 email sales@evansprinting.com.au 215 Mann Street Armidale www.evansprinting.com.au

your local printer proudly suporting the Nucleus 5

Interim Vice-Chanecellor Appointed Media Release - 14 February 2014

and I am very happy to the serve the University community in this interim capacity until that occurs.”

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he University of New England Chancellor, the Honourable John Watkins, today announced that the University Council has appointed Professor Annabelle Duncan, currently the University’s Deputy ViceChancellor, as its interim Vice-Chancellor.

Professor Duncan will fill the role until the conclusion of the international search process and the appointment of the University’s next Vice-Chancellor, expected later this year.

The outgoing Vice-Chancellor, Professor Jim Barber will move into a strategic advisor role supporting Professor Duncan during this period.

The Chancellor, The Honourable John Watkins, said that the recruitment process for the next Vice-Chancellor would commence immediately.

The appointment of Professor Annabelle Duncan will commence on March 23, 2014 and will be for an interim period.

Professor Duncan joined the University in September 2010 and has served as a loyal and capable Deputy Vice-Chancellor since that time. Professor Duncan has wide experience in the sector and held previous roles at La Trobe University, the University of Melbourne and the CSIRO. Professor Duncan is highly regarded for her professionalism and management skills, and in particular for strengthening research at the University.

“Professor Duncan is widely respected and has a very safe pair of hands to guide the University through this interim period. We expect this to cover the next few months while we undergo a global search,” Chancellor Watkins said.

Professor Duncan said that she is delighted to have been asked by the Council to take up the role of interim Vice-Chancellor until the new Vice-Chancellor is appointed.

“I’m strongly committed to UNE and am very keen to continue to serve it in any way I can.

To be appointed as interim Vice-Chancellor is a rare privilege. I also look forward to the recruitment process for the new Vice-Chancellor 6

Professor Duncan and Chancellor Watkins

2014 UNE Orientation 2014

By Bridgette Glover

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he University New Year began with a bang as students from all over the country flooded UNE; a welcoming change from the previous silence that fell over the campus during the third trimester. Around 1400 new faces were a part of the exciting week as they got to know the campus and the place that will be their homes for the next few years.

The commencement ceremony on the 17th of February kicked off the hectic week as Lazenby packed in hundreds of students in their academic gowns to be formally introduced to UNE. Lifesaver Day was the first opportunity for the new students of 2014 to get a sense of what the University has to offer, and it was hugely successful in the new venue, Sport UNE. Made even more popular by the free BBQ, pizza deliveries and DJ outside, hundreds of students, both Freshers and returners, filled the hall to be given as much free stuff as possible.

Other memorable parts of the week included the O-mazing Race which gave Freshers the chance to get (surprisingly) competitive and become familiar with the various Schools on campus; and of course there was the Freshers’ Bash at The Stro which is always a hit.

Although Orientation was technically over by the 21st, events still continued with Uni4Me holding a new event, Cinema on the Lawns.

Featuring live music by Dave Cheney, the free event was well attended with approximately

100 students chilling out on the Booloominbah Lawns to watch Now You See Me (2013).

The Clubs and Societies Fair was on the 26th, and was another opportunity for the students to become aware or a part of some of the associations within UNE. Held in the top courtyard, there was once again live music and free food as students in between their classes were able to wander about and have a closer look at how they could become more involved.

Mark Jongebloed, Independent Advocate at Uni4Me said “O-week was an excellent week and Uni4Me had lots going on. We had huge participation by the Locals, who might not necessarily be a part of the colleges, and that is really encouraging.”

“O-week was also great because it allowed Uni4Me to get out and meet as many people as possible and let them know who we are” Jongebloed continued. If you want to know more about Uni4Me or become a Blue Shirt Volunteer, check out their website http://www.uni4me.com. au. If you have an advocacy you can give the team a call on (02) 6773 2506

Clubs and Societies Fair 2014

New Name, New Staff

Job losses in the Computer Science Dept.

By Bridgette Glover

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here has been a mass sacking in the now non-existent computer science department at UNE. After being told that the retrenchment would only go as far as the loss of seven positions, the decision to sack 9 out of 10 positions hit hard.

This choice to basically obliterate the computer science department was part of a spill and

fill process by UNE to create a new multidisciplinary school now called “Computational Science.”

This movement, according to National Tertiary Education Union President Dr Tim Battin, “makes no sense.” Battin explained that management’s original reason for the shift lacked transparency; originally management’s justification was on weak demand for the degree, and then it shifted to low future prospects.

Battin explained that this made a mockery of the external review process, making mention of the 9% increase computer science had in 2013 student enrolments, and that there was definitely enough work for the 10 staff members.

“Management have had their sights on this department” says Battin, “and the amazing work by the staff has unfortunately been disregarded.”

Only four of the lecturers who were let go appealed for their jobs.

Talking Neanderthals challenge the origins of speech Media Release — 3 March 2014

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e humans like to think of ourselves as unique for many reasons, not least of which being our ability to communicate with words. But ground-breaking research by an expert from the University of New England shows that our ‘misunderstood cousins,’ the Neanderthals, may well have spoken in languages not dissimilar to the ones we use today.

Pinpointing the origin and evolution of speech and human language is one of the longest running and most hotly debated topics in the scientific world. It has long been believed that other beings, including the Neanderthals with whom our ancestors shared the Earth for thousands of years, simply lacked the necessary cognitive capacity and vocal hardware for speech.

Associate Professor Stephen Wroe, a zoologist and palaeontologist from UNE, along with an international team of scientists and the use of 3D x-ray imaging technology, made the revolutionary discovery challenging this notion based on a 60,000 year-old Neanderthal hyoid bone discovered in Israel in 1989.

“To many, the Neanderthal hyoid discovered was surprising because its shape was very

different to that of our closest living relatives, the chimpanzee and the bonobo. However, it was virtually indistinguishable from that of our own species. This led to some people arguing that this Neanderthal could speak,” A/Professor Wroe said.

“The obvious counterargument to this assertion was that the fact that hyoids of Neanderthals were the same shape as modern humans doesn’t necessarily mean that they were used in the same way. With the technology of the time, it was hard to verify the argument one way or the other.”

including Beyonce and Mariah Carey.

UNEWS President Kate Wood explained that “International Women’s Day is about celebrating the acheivements of women all over the world, and UNEWS are holding this event because there are many remarkable women at UNE, who we think should be admired and who we want to talk about”.

If you want to become involved with UNEWS you can find them on Facebook, or email them at managementunews@gmail.com.

However advances in 3D imaging and computer modelling allowed A/Professor Wroe’s team to revisit the question.

“By analysing the mechanical behaviour of the fossilised bone with micro x-ray imaging, we were able to build models of the hyoid that included the intricate internal structure of the bone. We then compared them to models of modern humans. Our comparisons showed that in terms of mechanical behaviour, the Neanderthal hyoid was basically indistinguishable from our own, strongly suggesting that this key part of the vocal tract was used in the same way.

“From this research, we can conclude that it’s likely that the origins of speech and language are far, far older than once thought.”

Afternoon Tea with UNEWS

Vote on Student Start-up Scholarships

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Media Release - 6 March 2014

he National Union of Students welcomes the Senate removing parts of the Social Services and Other Legislation Amendment Bill that would see Student Start-Up Scholarships turned into loans.

The full research paper and images can be found at the following link: http://www.plosone. org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal. pone.0082261

NUS National President Deanna Taylor said that this was a great win for students who have been campaigning against the Federal Governments’ proposed $2.3 billion higher education cuts, of which this plan was a part.

UNEWS holds Afternoon Tea in Celebration of Women’s Day

“That the Senate has now rejected turning Student Start-Up Scholarships into loans represents a victory for students,” said Deanna Taylor.

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By Bridgette Glover

nternational Women’s Day was acknowledged annually on the 8th of March, to celebrate the social, political and economic achievements of women worldwide.

The University of New England Women’s Society (UNEWS) held their own event at The Stro on the 7th of March to discuss and celebrate women of the past, present and future.

Staff and students of UNE discussed the globally recognised day and its aim whilst enjoying coffee, tea, biscuits and cake and listening to classics by powerful female artists

“Students faced choosing between being burdened with thousands of dollars more debt or struggling to pay for basic study expenses under the original legislation.

We look forward to seeing this move repeated in the House of Representatives.”

Deanna Taylor noted that the $900 million of cuts to university funding were still on the cards.

“Students will continue to oppose the $900 million cuts to university funding, and will make this loud and clear at demonstrations on the National Day of Action on March 26.”

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next time you do that, why not try wondering about happiness?

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pondering on something you have never considered before? Well,

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ever let you mind wander, and suddenly found yourself

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in a café meditating over a cup of coffee? Have you

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The only thing that seemed to connect them was that the happiness of the child affected the happiness of the mother.

Aloud and loudly, we wondered why, sparking the interest of a man with a broken nose sitting in the corner. After several failed attempts at pronunciation, (of which, “unpihy” was followed by raucous, confidence-building applause), he communicated to us that it was something called “empathy”.

Why does it exist? And how? It is a subject we ourselves have

For you, dear readers, perfect as you are, we believe empathy

thought on quite a lot, and to get an answer we decided to find

is best described with an alteration of a famous line: “Feel unto

some happy people. To do this, we had venture to a place happy

others what you would have them feel for you”. It’s the ability to

people often go: outside.

experience what others feel. But humans are not perfect in this

The first one we saw was a young woman at the park, happily watching a child—her child—who was happily playing. They fit the criteria quite well. To protect her anonymity, we shall call her SophiA. She never actually told us her name, dear readers, so if that is actually it, please try to forget it.

Possibly due to curiosity, but more likely our social ineptitude, we asked her why she was happy. Unfortunately, SophiA was not very co-operative when confronted, and seemed to simply stop being happy and left. This raises many more questions than can be addressed in this article alone. However, dear readers, we did find some information from this pair. Until SophiA hurriedly ushered the child away, darting glances back at our analysing gaze the whole while, the child was still happy. So the happiness of the child is not dependent on the happiness of the mother. Is the opposite true?

art. When one empathises with another, they feel what they themselves would feel instead of what the person is actually emoting. So why did the mother show this empathy while the child did not? The answer is devilishly simple. The mother did not like questions, so when we asked some of the child, she felt her inherent dislike of them through her child. The child, as uneducated as he was, was open-minded enough to not have developed an irrational hatred of intrusive lines of questioning.

The Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard once said that “the thing is to find a truth which is true for me”. That, dear readers, that is the hard part. It is difficult to judge ourselves, much easier to judge another. Often we simply see through our own eyes, and assume that what is true for us is true for them as well. Next time you see an annoying person, for example, perhaps you should wonder if they see the same thing as you. Ask yourself, what do they see in me? What do they see in themselves? If empathy is

To test this we found a few more subjects and asked them

to be done right, we must empathise with our enemies, see our

similar questions—with similar responses. A child, who we will

own faults and fix them. Only then can we truly make everybody

call SophiB, seemed very confused at even our most basic line

happy.

of questioning, and his mother, SophiC became unhappy and repeated the actions of SophiA. As far as we could tell, the confusion of the unlearned toddler was not happiness. In all, five afternoons were ruined. We feel somewhat responsible.

Unfortunately, there was a lack of happy people in our cell, so we could not glean any more information on the subject. This

In the end, this all points to two things: 1.

If you see someone who is happy, empathise and be happy for them.

2. If you see someone who is unhappy, empathise and make them happy.

at least, dear readers, gave us time to ponder on what we had gained. It seemed that the children were happy because they

And that’s how we’ll get to world peace.

were playing, and became unhappy once interrupted, while the mothers were only happy when no one was asking any questions.

Until next time,

So: mothers, in general, do not like questions and tend to move

Hoi Sin

away from them; while children do not like moving. We still do not understand why the two parties continue to mingle despite a clear conflict of interests.

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Hoi Sin does not exist, has never existed and can never exist.

But we keep getting articles.

The Happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything Belinda likes to think she’s a writer, but honestly, she just likes to put on her rangry pants and have a good old rant. You can read her shenanigans at rangry.wordpress.com; she is also a regular contributor at thebigsmoke.com.au and theaimn.com.

The Different Forms of Happiness

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by Belinda Marsh

riting about happiness is much, much harder than I thought it would be. It’s such a simple feeling, and achieved with a minimum of fuss if we really think about it, yet it’s such an abstract concept that it slips out of our grasp in a momentary flash.

The Mall Happiness As religion fades faster than last spring’s fashion colours, we consumers go to a new church: The Mall. Faithfully we attend on a Sunday and worship consumerism, sacrificing our money at the altar of desire and perceived need, based on what companies and multinational corporations tell us will fill the void we feel in our very souls and finally, really, honestly, truly make us happy. On the whole, we seem to enjoy participating, even though we know the happiness is only a fleeting feeling that dissipates quicker than you can say Levi 501s, and before we know it, we’re lusting after the next musthave, this-will-make-mehappy trinket.

The Keeping Up With The Joneses Happiness This is more expensive than The Mall happiness, because if Brad Jones next door buys a new Commodore, then suddenly we feel like second-class citizens. Naturally he is out there every weekend, washing his new pride and joy, polishing the windows and vacuuming the illustrations by Bessie, the neighbour’s cat

upholstery, simply so he can shove his earnings ability in your face. You are a loser in comparison, less of a man, because you can’t provide for your family like Brad does.

And visiting Janet Jones is like taking a trip through Harvey Norman hell. You take with you a cake you baked (and burned, but you cut off all the black bits and iced over it so hopefully she won’t know), and she explains that the new lounge they bought cost them an absolute fortune, but isn’t it just a darling thing? Much better than the old lounge suite, which was soooo last year.

You’re seething inside because your lounge is nearing ten years old and has been jumped, vomited and crapped all over by the kids and you keep patching it up because you know that if you replace it, the TV remote you dropped down in the cushions somewhere and simply can’t locate will be gone forever. You have only recently worked out exactly where to sit to change the channel.

Zen and the Art of Alternative Happiness Now it’s time for those who have chosen an alternative route in life to weigh in on the happiness issue. We may feel that becoming more humanitarian, environmentally aware, and conscious of the frills of capitalism can

produce genuine happiness. Helping others in need, treading lightly on Mother Earth, and not buying into the consumerism trap (pun intended) is an option those in the alternative lifestyle movement aspire to.

Going ‘off-grid’ is a new housing trend, inspired by the hippies from the 60s, as we install solar panels on the roof, build composting toilets and dig veggie patches. No corporations required, except for the initial purchasing of solar equipment. Oh, and what about eventual disposal of the dangerous batteries used to store the sun’s power?

Maybe instead we can Om our way to happiness through meditation, yoga, Gurus, veganism, drugs and dreadlocks. Don’t forget the clothing we must have in order to be considered a true hippie, made with chemical-laden materials in dangerous Indian sweat shops using child labour. Hmmm.

Genuine Happiness Happiness may be in the eye of the beholder. We must seek out what makes us truly happy, and sustains (sustains) that happiness for as long as possible. We search high and low for things to make us happy, yet perhaps happiness is not to be found in ‘things’. Maybe it’s a choice, a feeling we can experience and choose to hold onto or let go of. Who knows? Perhaps the happiness is in the search for happiness.

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OPINION

Photo from: www.feminspire.com

“We need feminism because ... Equality for Women is Progress for All”

by Helen Taylor

I believe I deserve to walk in the world feeling safe, and heard, and respected. I believe every human deserves that right. I believe women and men should be equal, although equality may not look the way we think it does. In the world we all inhabit, sometimes we are equal, and sometimes we aren't.

If anything on this list applies to you (particularly the last part about women and men being equal), well then, you're probably a feminist too. Oops. Feminism: it’s not just for girls.

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Strengths and weaknesses would be re-defined, so that anyone could be a hero. So that emotional was no longer equal to feminine and logical was no longer equal to masculine. So that being emotional did not cancel out your stakes in the fight, but neither would logical responses make you unfeeling.

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Everyone would be a breadwinner and a stay-athomer. And neither one would be worth more than the other according to the law, according to society or according to ourselves.

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An hour of a woman’s work would be equal to an hour of a man’s work.

Everyone would walk safe in the world– women would not be targeted for attacks of a sexual nature, and men would not be targeted for attacks showcasing a warped sense of ‘asserting masculinity’. Nobody would be attacked because they didn’t look or ‘act’ like a man or a woman. The makers of laws would show the same level of motivation in addressing victims of domestic violence as addressing victims of king hits.

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No would always mean no, and yes would always mean yes, and there would be no alcohol/attire/ attitude-based excuses for misreading the simple fact of the matter.

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Nobody would ever be excused from unacceptable behaviour because of ‘biology’. Seriously, how is this still a thing? “Boys will be boys” should not equate to prevalent rape culture in male-dominated sports.

“Throwing like a girl” should not equal with weakness, or second-best, or second-class.

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Bodies would be off-limits as a site of demonstrating power—women would make decisions about their bodies in real and meaningful ways. Laws would not be written removing women from their reproductive rights. No-one would die having needed to break a law just to make a personal decision.

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Anyone who was brave enough to put their hand up to run the world or the country or the state or the city or the business or the department or the meeting should be able to do it based on merit, and not on any other factor.

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Amazing popular culture that actually lead by example, teaching girls, boys, women, men and everyone else that their heart and mind are cherished beyond any physical characteristics. I believe this to be the biggest wish of them all…

You see, equality for women can be progress for all—a natural extension of this epic wish list is that any person who has been victimised or devalued or disempowered would step out of the margins into this same world and be equal. Homophobia and transphobia and racism and classism and any ism you care to name, gone the way of sexism. Progress! That’s what I believe feminism to be working for.

While we feminists are humans, and bound to get things wrong sometimes, just like everyone else, we have heart and passion and courage, too. The world, and women, need feminism, for the sake and passionate pursuit of equality.

Chocolate milk!

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Helen is studying Arts Management, and things that make her happy

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So now I’ve established that all of us are feminists I assume the rest of my article basically writes itself.

I am a privileged woman and I can only really speak for myself, but I do say this—the sooner that women and men are equal in all the ways, the happier the world shall be. And that’s this month’s theme, right?

Happiness.

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The Celebration of Everything—girls could play football in the mud and enjoy a spot of sewing pink dresses to wear. Boys could play house and have a thing for big trucks. Women could be strong and tough and cry in public. Men could confess their insecurities to their friends and make tough decisions under pressure. A person wouldn’t even have to call themselves a man or a woman if they didn’t want, and no-one would find that a threat. The thing that makes humans amazing is the many discrepancies. In an equal world, we would allow all those parts to exist.

Heck, we would celebrate all those different parts of a person.

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When I call myself a feminist, this is what I mean: I am 28 and unmarried, and free to use birth control.

I believe in a woman's right to choose, pursue further education, work to support myself, spend my money how I please, spend my time doing things I enjoy (some of which have no conceivable contribution to society), have actively involved myself in contributing to society, have various friendship circles, have developed my own politics and life philosophy. I make big and small decisions based on what I want my life to look like. I do all these things wearing what I want.

I encourage others to do the same, and I'm aware that as a white, middle class, educated woman, I am incredibly fortunate and privileged compared with many others in the world. I am knowingly lucky, and try my best to make the most of all this opportunity. I do my best to exercise compassion and care for others, regardless of our similarities or our differences, but I reserve the right to fail at these lofty aspirations occasionally.

For the sake of a theme of happiness, I shall offer up some ideas about how awesome all the things might be for all the people in an equal world. It will be a numbered list, because that is something that makes me happy.

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arch 8 was International Women’s Day. The official United Nations theme for 2014 is ‘Equality for Women is Progress for All’. For me, that means calling myself a feminist, and believing in feminist causes.

include chocolate milk, paper goods and 80’s teen movies.

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Chloe is a distance education student from Brisbane, currently completing her third year in a BA majoring in archaeology and palaeoanthropology with the aim of being a forensic anthropologist in the future. In her spare time, she likes to read a lot of books and play field hockey.

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OPINION

Some thoughts on the UNESA Constitution

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society or club may be just a gathering of friends but, to gain limited members liability, it has to become a legal entity through incorporation. Only then can it enter into contracts.

This requires something that defines the entity, namely the constitution. An association is therefore embodied in its constitution.

The Constitution is a Contract The constitution defines the services supplied by the association and the rules under which members receive those services. It is in fact a contract between member and association. When applying to join, members have to agree to be bound by the constitution which establishes both rights and obligations. Before the last UNESA elections, applicants were not asked to abide by the constitution and hence strictly speaking there were no members and the elections were actually invalid.

Some History behind this Constitution With its first words, the UNESA constitution tries to gain authenticity by claiming to be based on the model constitution of the NSW Dept of Fair Trading, but this has been changed quite significantly by both students and administration. The process appears to have been dominated by university fears of student malfeasance (as happened a few years ago at UNE when members of the committee ran off with thousands of dollars) and an overly paternalistic attitude to students.

UNESA is a Controlled Entity The result is that UNESA is a controlled entity.

The university has the right to sack the Board if they do not like their decisions, replace the Board with another Board of members chosen by the university, and nominally has to approve all changes in the constitution. Some students may feel safer having this university overview but, if the association is going to represent students that may be in dispute with the university, then this overview is unacceptable. It creates an atmosphere of compliance and supplication, not independent representation.

Lack of Independence The lack of independence is exemplified by the executive officer position, filled, under the constitution, by a university employee whose manager is the head of Student Services. This would seem to be an untenable position, with two bosses, liable to lead to serious conflicts of interest. The Executive Officer should be employed directly by the Association, independent of the university.

The Returning Officer should also be independent of the university, not appointed by the university.

Otherwise we have disgraceful situations like last year when the postgrad association executive agreed unanimously to call fresh elections but the Returning Officer refused to allow it. The Returning Officer should also be independent of the Executive Committee, not a member of it, as in the current constitution.

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Democracy and Free Speech UNESA is meant to be democratic, but this requires free speech. In all associations, there must be a register of members. In the NSW model constitution, this includes contact details. This requirement has been removed in the UNESA constitution. Normally, any member may contact any other member about matters relating to the association but not in UNESA. Clearly the member must not abuse the right of communication, free speech, but it must not be denied.

A full membership list including contact details (email addresses are sufficient) is necessary to underpin the essential free speech within a democratic organisation.

Directly elected Presidents The issue of whether the President should be directly elected by members is the same issue that has arisen in relation to Mayors of Town/City Councils.

Directly elected Presidents tend to become despotic, doing what they wish, not what the Board wishes. The President needs to look up to the Board, and work with the Board. To ensure this, the person should be elected by the Board.

Elections would be best held in Trimester 1 so that the Board has most of two “normal” trimesters to get together and get things done. Trying to run the Board in Trimester 3 is very hard with most students being off campus. Many students, especially one-year postgrads are only here from late Feb to September.

Many final year students leave at the end of Trimester 2, potentially decimating the Board for Trimester 3.

A rolling election with two-year terms and half the board being elected each year to maintain institutional knowledge would be preferable. Finally, as there will be many new members this year, given application forms in registration, the sooner we give them a say, the better. We always used to have elections in Trimester 1; having them in Trimester 2 is purely a historical result of the mismanagement of elections in Trimester 1, 2012.

Values and Vision If you look at other constitutions—e.g. Sydney or Melbourne unions—they have a clear set of Objects of the constitution. Instead, UNESA has a couple of vague value and vision statements. The first value statement is “to create an environment that respects and develops leadership”. This is quite frightening. It’s almost saying we must obey our gruppenleiter with his blue, or is it brown, shirts.

In encouraging student involvement, some universities actually say words like “become a student rep, learn new skills, improve your CV”!

Many politicians including student reps, are in it for themselves, for the kudos, the indulgence of spending funds, enjoying the parties, etc. Who is UNESA really supposed to benefit?

The Vision statement of UNESA is “To represent without fear or favour, the students of the University of New England. To encourage participation in a fair and just tertiary experience through shared higher

thinking”. This is weak motherly statement nothing like the 12 meaningful and concrete objects of the Sydney Union.

And although UNESA is supposed to respect and value diversity, the current executive, rather than engaging in dialogue, has bitterly attacked anyone speaking up.

What do we see as the role of UNESA? There are two distinct roles for UNESA: a. running of a student union with bars, cafes, shops, concerts, etc, i.e. create a real social hub as at Sydney and ANU; and b. representing student views to the university, advocacy, counselling, defending students caught in university maladministration, etc.

These two roles are quite different. The first is a managerial role involving large sums of money.

This should be run by a professional CEO with the necessary skills, employed through the normal competitive process with full CVs and interviews, leading to 3 or 5 year contracts. The CEO should answer to a Board which could then concern itself with the representative role. Members of the UNESA Board are currently elected on the basis of a ridiculously small 200-word bio. This is not a good basis for selecting people to run an organisation with a significant budget.

Effects of the SSAF structure set up by the Commonwealth The student association has been put in the role of a supplicant, seeking to get funds spent in a certain way. This conflicts with the association’s role as representing students in disputes with the university. It has also pushed the business of the association almost totally towards what to spend the funds on. The role of representation has been almost totally forgotten as in the past SSAF debate. There also seems to have been no representation over the many postgraduate issues of poor supervision, poor resources and inequitable funding.

What I am tending towards here is a constitution very like those of Sydney and Melbourne Universities.

There you have a Board which employs a CEO and Secretary to run the commercial aspects and handle the money. Rather than have a Board with reps based on internal versus external constituencies, UNESA could have an Equity Officer, a Media officer, etc, all roles for which everyone can vote. This might create a much more unified association than the current board of external student reps, college students and townies.

These are a few ideas for discussion; I tend them purely as my own. This is a very lay document; I apologise for its many shortcomings. Would those who would like to see the calling of an SGM to change the UNESA constitution please contact me.

Colin Hargreaves colin.hargreaves@une.edu.au

OPINION

In Defence of the Constitution...(and a response to the attacks on the UNESA Board)

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Seeing kids happy.

A child’s laugh is infectious.

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Josh Osborne UNESA Vice-President

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Final Comments There are a litany of other points to address in the opinion piece but I shall only pick out some.

The 200-word bio exists so it can be published in the Nucleus and, when voting, further information can be distributed by candidates if they feel it is appropriate to do so. We are university students and we do have the capacity to seek out more information than 200 words in making decisions. The accusation of Internal v.

External on the Board is a myth and minutes can prove it.

The Constitution is not perfect and UNESA is still young. We have growing to do and lessons to learn. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but it can be burnt down in a day so beware the person handing out torches and pitch forks.

Directly elected Presidents?

Both points for the membership to consider, however there was intent behind the Trimester 2 election. It wasn’t the result of a historical hangup, but was so that new members could get a feel for the Association and its direction, as opposed to voting blind.

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UNESA as a Controlled Entity?

The Student Association has a level of interdependence with the University and these are based on our historical situation; there was no Student Association with any capacity at UNE one and half years ago and now with the acquisition of services and one commercial operation, we are getting somewhere. In order to get this far we have worked with the University, which has been difficult at times, and earned a trust and level of respect as a part of the University that will be cantankerous at times.

Democracy and Free Speech?

A register is kept as required by the NSW Fair Trading Act, however we will not be handing out the email of every member into the ether—particularly not to students that hold no democratically elected position to do with what they will. The President doesn’t have access to these emails and can only communicate with the whole membership when the communiqué is passed by the Board. It is a duty of care we owe to the student such that the information contained on the register isn’t abused. The Nucleus plays a vital role in providing this space for students.

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Invalid Elections?

If the accusation is that the elections were invalid then surely that should be the main thrust of the article. Setting that aside—all members agreed to become a Member of the Association and a copy of the Constitution was available upon request or linked to the document when students signed up. It is now practice to ask student to agree to be bound by the Constitution if they wish to become a Member of the Association.

Values and Vision?

We are not the Melbourne or Sydney Student Unions that have existed since the beginning of time; we are new and as has just happened, our role is changing and shifting. The Constitution was always meant to have room for growth and was drafted as such. It may not be up to the standards of our Go8 counterparts but I think that is at times excusable. It does need to change in due course.

There will be a time in the future when the student association has further capacity and resources, beyond the current board, where a process of further separation from the University should be considered. But from where the current Board started to where UNESA is now I am confident that this has been the right course of action.

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o begin with, the title of the above opinion piece is misleading as it isn’t only about thoughts on the constitution—it is an attack on the current Board. However, to address some of the points in this opinion essay of half-made points, here are some of my own half-made points.

- Jenna M

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O-Week Recap

O-Mazing Race!

Swimming Carnival

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Photographs by David Doyle

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Fresher’s Bash

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- Elizabeth

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Life Saver Day

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Still from Fight Club (1999)

“When you have insomnia you’re never really asleep and you’re never really awake.”

- Fight Club

By Rach Hopkins

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o a young insomniac who is hearing this line at 4:30am from the movie they put on when they gave up on sleep, this sentence is a beacon of light. A universal truth of insomnia is how horribly alone the sufferers feel. When in the ‘not really awake’ stage, zombie walking through the day, doing anything is an enormous anxiety-filled effort. During the ‘not really asleep’ stage, the clock ticks away, the single gleam of moonlight through the window moves across the wall, the sky brightens. These things happen, but are barely registered in the zombie mind. One thing insomniacs learn about sleepless nights is how to judge the right moment to give up on sleeping. Let’s call it accepting your sleepless fate, because that makes you a hero on a journey. Once your fate is accepted you must choose your path. What will you do with this time? There are many strategies to suffering through each endless night. For those struggling right now with stress turning you into insomniac zombies, here is my step-by-step guide to attacking a sleepless night.

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Step 1: Relaxing music I personally can’t sleep while music is playing, but I can calm myself with music to the point of banishing the insomnia for another night. I

suggest the very aptly named artist Sleeping at Last. This guy has a cover of ‘500 miles’ by the Proclaimers that is like a fleece blanket draped around your soul. He made ‘The Safety Dance’ into something mothers and fathers should sing to their babies at night. His album Yearbook Collection has 36 tracks of relaxation power so great it’s like each song is a fluffy pillow filling your life with comfort. Thirty-six fluffy pillows gently hugging you until you are ready to sleep at last. Awesome band. Sleeping at Last. Tell your friends.

Step 2: Writing Music is rarely all it takes for a hardcore insomniac to end their sleepless fate. It does not matter if you do not think of yourself as a writer, the reason you are awake might be some stupid thought in your head wreaking havoc. Keep your Sleeping at Last playing, switch on a lamp and take out a pen and paper. Or keep your Sleeping at Last playing, open up notes in your phone and thank the Elders of Auto Correct for interpreting your Zombie State button-mash into insanity ridden sentences.

Lifting the weight off your mind and turning it into words on a page (or screen) is sometimes

all it takes to leave you sleeping like a kitten. Not like a baby. Waking up every two hours crying for no reason is not good.

Step 3: Read I have discovered some of my favourite books through insomnia. Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk is an amazing book and it proves that, as an insomniac, you are not alone! You share insomnia with the crazy narrator! Another thing about Fight Club that makes it a great “I can’t sleep” book is Chuck Palahniuk’s writing style.

He writes the way people think; ideas jumping around and weaving in and out of the story.

Zombie brains can follow it and be completely lost but entertained, or simply grow weary of the confusing style and then fall asleep.

Me? I read the whole book in one sitting and fell asleep once it was done because I had closure. I finally knew I could be a much worse insomniac.

Step 4: (attempt to) Work Sometimes you just need to bore yourself into sleeping. Focus rarely works when you can’t sleep, but the act of focusing on a difficult task is sometimes so exhausting you finally finish your

sleepless journey. Listen to the podcast of a lecture you missed.

Read that chapter from your textbook you have been putting off.

Write a rough and terrible first draft of an essay. Write an article for Nucleus inspired by your inability to sleep!

HOW I WOULD RE-DO MY FRESHER YEAR(;

Disclaimer: Insomniac work done at ridiculous o’clock may be a completely unintelligible jumble of words. Proof-reading is your friend. As is waiting until morning to submit anything written in an insomniac state. To paraphrase Hemingway, “Write zombie, edit human”.

THE FINAL STEP: Watch something It’s that time. It’s that ambiguous time of 4:30isham when you lie down with your eyes wide and burning after all the practical steps have failed. The sun will rise in a few hours. So what else is there to do but watch a movie or TV show? I know I started this article with me watching Fight Club at 4:30am, but that was a terrible idea.

By morning all I wanted was to make soap and dynamite. I highly recommend the movie, just not at ridiculous o’clock.

A show that is fantastic at ridiculous o’clock is Shameless (U.S.).

The story follows a family of six kids with an alcoholic father. The kids turn to a variety of unconventional means in order to make ends meet. Watching this show has made me feel less poor and it makes insomnia seem like the easiest problem in the world, compared to the issues of the Gallagher family. The brilliant acting, hilarious comedic moments, heart-breaking realism and some ridiculously lush cast members, make this show even more worthwhile.

Warning: You will fall in love with this family and it will hurt in the best way.

At the time of writing this, I had tried every one of these steps.

If step 5 has stretched to several episodes and those annoying birds outside start chirping, the time is between 5:45am and 6:30am.

When you reach this point, just close your eyes and wait for the last traces of night to disappear. Insomniacs know that some nights the only thing that will make you sleep is the sun rise. Maybe you will get an hour of not-really-sleep before you have to go to class. I hope this helps with your sleepless nights, or at least gives you some great songs and stories to enjoy. I’m going to sleep now, and I am so glad it’s my day off.

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Blowjobs!

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Going out by myself to buy McDonalds and successfully hiding the evidence. Covert maccas run!

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Rach Hopkins is a severe story addict making no efforts toward recovery.

She is enrolled at UNE studying a Bachelor of Arts doing a double major in English and writing in order to feed into her filthy habit and increase the quality of her own product.

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Port Stephens with family

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FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF A SLIGHTLY DISGRUNTLED COLLEGE KID

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by Katie Host

ow that the New Year is off to a roaring start and all the fresh-faced, little first years are just beginning to recover from their O-week hangovers, it’s bringing back a lot of hazy memories from last year when I was one of those nauseous little freshers. Now that 2013 has come and gone with, only one unjust $55 noise complaint, countless packets of noodles consumed and maybe one or two (who’s counting?) failed classes, I deemed it my duty to reflect on how my first year of college went so I could possibly, hopefully share some wisdom of how you could do it better.

That’s not to say that my first year was particularly horrible or anything, but if you happen to be like me and suffer from an involuntary Daria-like attitude to most situations, then college might be a bit of a struggle for you. But not to worry! Here are a few helpful tips that might ease you through the rest of the year. So pay attention and good luck!

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Don’t be intimidated. You belong there just as much as anyone else—even if they have been there six years and know every resident and staff by name. Being one of the newbies can be very daunting and sometimes the oldies don’t make it any easier.

Just relax and make college feel like your home—because it is for the next… however long you can handle it.

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The best time to do your laundry is very late at night. And I’m not talking 11pm late at night, I’m talking 2am late at night. Those tiny rooms can get pretty packed with a lot of frantic people trying to get their clothes clean, so the only guaranteed time is late. Yes, you may develop a slight case of hypothermia on the walk there but it beats being out of clean underwear for two days. Trust me.

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Do not take your phones to class! Because… well, isn’t it obvious? It will distract you. You don’t need to see your friend’s lunch on Instagram right now and your lecturer doesn’t need to see a big, white/black/dimontied rectangle in front of your face (seriously though, you guys aren’t even coy about it, put it in your lap or something c’mon), it’ll hurt their feelings and it’s just plain rude. If you’re going to haul-ass all the way up that hill for class, you may as well pay attention.

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Never waltz into the dining room at 6:20 expecting to get a chicken schnitzel.

You’re going to be having the mystery stir-fry, accept it. There are a lot of hungry, hungry hippos hiding a second schnitty underneath their vegies and the early birds really do get the worms! So just get used to eating dinner at 5:30 like an 80-year-old.

It’s the safest way.

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Call your folks! After you settle in and get your routine down-pat, your home-life can often fall to the wayside. But your family will be missing you and wanting updates, so just call your freaking mum! Or dad. Or weird, smelly aunt. Whoever.

Trust me, it will make their day and it will make you feel pretty great too. Win, win.

So there it is guys and gals. If you sift through all the pointless references and meaningless add-ins, you might find one or two pearls of wisdom under there. But aside from all that; just chill out and have fun. This is definitely the last point of your life where you will be in this kind of extraordinary setting—just a bunch of kids together ready to have a good time and make some memories—so live it up. If you’re a fresher, just know that everything will work out and this could be the place that you have the best times of your life. And if you’re a returner, never forget how special it is to be able to live with 200 of your bestest friends at such a young, carefree age. Don’t take any moment for granted, the lot of you!

Katie studies Psychology, and is the kind of girl who uses nail polish remover wipes on her face, and only realises after seeing a friend use them on their toes two weeks later.

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Endorphins

An interview with Dr Jordan McKenzie by Stu Horsfield

Dr Jordan McKenzie is a lecturer in Sociology at The University of New England. His recent research involves the application of social theory in developing experience based interpretations of everyday life, and this can be found in his research on happiness and contentment. Other areas of interest include participatory democracy, the sociology of emotion, and the sociology of knowledge.

Can you say a bit about your work on happiness, and what your definition of happiness would be?

Defining happiness I think is really problematic in this area. There are a lot of different definitions floating around, and if you look at studies from economics, psychology, sociology and so on, you’ll see terms like ‘happiness’, ‘subjective wellbeing’, ‘contentment’, and ‘satisfaction’; they not only mean different things within a single study, they can often mean quite different things from study to study. So, what one group might refer to as ‘happiness’ may be closer to ‘wellbeing’ for a different group, and so on.

You might be interested to know that the far majority of happiness research is actually done by economists, which I think is really peculiar. There is a journal called The Journal of Happiness Studies which publishes a lot on this topic. From memory I think about 75–80% of it is written by economists, and most of the remaining 20% is psychologists. So for sociology, and even philosophy, I think it’s interesting to note that especially in journal publications, their voice is really missing from the area.

My research in the sociology of happiness and contentment is interested in looking at a number of things: how societies construct or think about happiness; and how we can think about different forms of happiness depending on whether they are socially derived or perhaps more personally experienced. In my PhD thesis I was trying to set up the distinction of happiness as a personal experience and contentment as a social emotion, or at least a socially dependent emotion. In order to feel content about something I think you need to feel as though it is in line with your expectations; that it’s in line with social standards, norms and values. So, something might make you feel really happy, but if it’s socially deviant it might be hard for that to produce a kind of lasting contentment.

As a result that means that contentment is an aspect of your relationship with society and how you understand yourself through connecting with society, rather than a purely personal, individualistic thing.

So in that sense, you could say that happiness and contentment both change over time.

You mentioned the problematic nature of happiness, in what sense is it problematic?

I think one of the reasons happiness is a bit problematic today is really tied to expectations. If you look at a lot of the data and research on happiness levels, it does appear in a lot of this research that happiness is in decline. There is this thing that’s referred to as the ‘Easterlin paradox’ which this very famous researcher discovered, which suggests that as disposable income goes up in advanced first world

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STAFF PROFILE

The Sociology of Happiness and Contentment

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countries, the number of people reporting that they’re very happy actually goes down. This paradox has been argued about since the 70s I think, but it does still seem to be happening.

I think the reason why we’re seeing this perceived decline is around this idea of expectations; we have come to expect a lot. I expect my TV shows to be instantly available online when I want them to be, I want the latest bits of information on my phone, instantly and smoothly, I expect technology to work.

We expect to be able to get from one place to another faster and cheaper. We derive a sense of what we ought to expect from our social life. Not just through socialisation, education, and so on, but also through comparing ourselves to our friends, colleagues and family members.

We develop these ideas about where we ought to be up to, what we ought to have accomplished, and these expectations are really tricky, because we live in a world that is increasingly unpredictable and kind of chaotic. It’s a bit like, you’re setting up these life goals, but by the time you’re ready to accomplish them the goal posts have moved.

You might be doing a university degree, and then at the end of the three or four years it takes you to finish the degree, maybe that career doesn’t really exist in the way it existed when you started the degree. This is something that we all feel strangely familiar about, but at the same time we all expect to have these great careers and to accomplish a great deal. That can be really challenging emotionally, to live with that kind of instability and impermanence, but at the same time have these high expectations for the possibilities of what might happen.

It sounds kind of depressing, but at the same time the reason I’m so interested in this area is that I think there are a lot of really valuable lessons that can be extracted out of sociology that can help us better understand happiness.

Does happiness emerge from contentment? Or are they different things?

I think they’re quite different. One of the funny things about happiness when you look at it in the long term is that often the times in our lives that we look back on as being the happiest were not actually terribly enjoyable while we were doing them. There’s a great line from Theodor Adorno in Minima Moralia where he says that happiness only really exists in memories, because when we are doing things that make us happy, it’s often not really pleasurable.

As an undergraduate student, you might think back to a time when you were writing an essay and it was just painful, it was really tough and you doubted

yourself, stressed, worried, and panicked. And then you get a really high grade for it and you look back on this 10 years later as being this great time in your life where you accomplished something fantastic, but at the time you just wanted to crawl back into bed and hide from everything. And that’s of course perfectly normal. That highlights one of the challenges with our thinking about happiness.

I think modernity promises happiness to be this kind of instant gratification, we live in this kind of instant consumer society, and so I think there are aspects of modernity that make promises about happiness that it actually can’t keep. You know, ‘if you do this or that you’ll be happy’, if you get this new car or new outfit and so on. And that teaches us that happiness is something that should be gained instantly, that you should get something for nothing, or get more than you put in. I don’t think happiness really works that way. That leads back to the point I was making before about expectations, that we expect things to be instantly satisfying.

Would you say that happiness, and to an extent contentment, involves an element of hard work?

Yeah, unfortunately. This is an argument that has been going on for a long time. Do we need a degree of unpleasantness in order to help us contextualise pleasantness? I definitely think we need a variety.

Part of that is accepting that a certain degree of unpleasantness or sadness is actually perfectly natural. I think we live in a society that doesn’t think that way. A few hundred years ago we would think about melancholia as being something that highly intelligent people had. The great composer or the great mathematician would go through a period of melancholia and it was admirable. It was like an athlete punishing their body in order to accomplish a physical task. An intellectual would go through melancholia to accomplish some great piece of work.

This is something that people really were in awe of, and now it’s something that has to be cured.

Of course, I have to be absolutely clear: my work is more about happiness and sadness in the majority of people. In terms of cases where people are suffering from something quite radically different I’ll hold back from commenting because it’s not my area. I’m not looking at people who are suffering from an illness, I’m looking at people who fit within what we might call ‘normal’, but who, in day to day life will feel happy and feel sad. I think there is definitely a wider scope for thinking about normal amounts of happiness and sadness than we sometimes give credit for. But the idea that sadness necessarily has to be fixed and cured, I don’t buy into that idea.

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Passing Exams!

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d a Gr

Diana Cowie

DEGREE: Bachelor of Arts with Honours (majoring in

AT UNE: for four years with some Anthropology units taken via cross-institution study with the University of Southern Queensland during that time.

STUDY MODE: internal, and lived on campus at Duval College. Most subjects were internal with classes on campus.

GRADUATED: in 2010 (completed Honours

Archaeology and Palaeoanthropology).

W

hat got you through your years of student life?

The friends and support I had within the college, and my passion for a fun and non-stressful career.

Graduate Profile

r e t f A Life n o i t a Diana Cowie u

in 2009).

What are your words of wisdom to current students?

•

Did you change your degree at any point while studying?

No, I just added Honours when I discovered it would be essential to getting an archaeology job in Australia.

Think about how you best learn: what subjects or information have I remembered the best and why? I found I remembered information best when I did something practical with it, such as making notes whilst listening, testing out the information, turning the concept into a mind-map or manipulating it in some visual way. Once you understand how you learn best, then you can try and shape the way you receive, learn and remember information.

•

What is the most useless thing you learned as a student?

I can’t really remember — I’ve forgotten it was so useless. There is a lot of theoretical and information about specific stuff that was interesting but I won’t use today. I remember learning triangulation as a surveying tool but I have never used it since — we live in a digital age which makes life a lot easier.

Apply for work experience at a local company one day a week during the term, or utilise your extensive holidays to do some work experience. It takes time and effort but pays dividends in helping your memory, expanding your skills, and making you more employable when it comes time to apply for jobs post-uni.

•

Take the time to get to know your lecturers and take advantage of the small class sizes at UNE. It may open the door to some fabulous opportunities. The opportunities I had to work closely with lecturers, better equipped me than many other graduates for the workforce beyond and I have had many other invites and opportunities to work on exciting, interesting, international and Australian projects in archaeology and cultural heritage.

What valuable lesson/s have you learned from your student years?

How to be a diligent researcher, and an insight into the Australian consulting archaeology scene.

Has your life and mindset changed since graduating?

Once you start working and earning a full-time income, it is difficult to go back to study. Your lifestyle changes, especially sleeping and waking habits, but the world beyond uni is exciting and interesting.

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Playing ukulele and singing with friends

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ENVIRONMENT

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- Louise Y

The Politics of Climate Change

by Louise Young

I was born in the late 1950s at a time when the climate was more benevolent than it appears to be now.

I feel that each generation has a profound duty to try to leave the earth a better place for those who come after—not just people, but nature as well. I am saddened to see what we are doing to this beautiful planet, and will continue to do what I can to improve our shared future.

Credit: ‘SolarGas’ by David Hoye

Author’s note: The larger red print indicates ppm of CO2 in the listed year.

350ppm is a safe level of Atmospheric CO2 . . . 358.37ppm was the level for January 1994 397.80ppm was the level for January 2014 . . . And this is not slowing, but increasing each and every year

400ppm is a dangerous level…

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.

The second best time is now.”

- Chinese Proverb

I

n case you do not know, fossil fuels contain very high amounts of carbon, which is perfectly safe when left in the ground, but when they are brought to the surface and burnt as fuels they release CO2 into the atmosphere and the cumulative effect of this is the primary cause of man-made climate change.

The scientific knowledge that we now possess is unparalleled in our shared history. So when extensive, rigorous and prolonged scientific investigation into climate change tells us that rising levels of atmospheric CO2 will cause the climate to shift, and we can chart the rise and rise of CO2 each and every year, then why do we continue to still rely so heavily on the fossil fuel industry?

The fossil fuel industry is enormously powerful and has huge influence in many of the governments around the world. Unfortunately, due to our vast mining industry, Australia is one of the fore runners for this ‘out of public view’ agreement between government and big business. This collusion is well documented and makes for sobering reading.1, 2, 3 Back in February 2006, the ABC’s ‘Four Corners’ program exposed how the Australian

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climate change policy was decided under the then-Howard Government. It told the story of a small but powerful group that called themselves the Greenhouse Mafia. This group consisted of executive directors of the coal, oil, cement, mining and electricity industries. Apparently, they were given extraordinary influence over Australia’s position on climate change.4 They did their best to skew any reports on climate change, painting the renewable energy section as unreliable and bad for the economy.

They also successfully painted anyone actively concerned with the environment as ‘left wing’, and also bad for the economy.

In 2007, Clive Hamilton wrote “Scorcher, The Dirty Politics of Climate Change.”1 Reading this book was like taking a journey into a time warp.

The words could have been about exactly what is happening today, except it was written seven years ago.

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The trouble is, all of this collusion and double speak and sidelining still continues. We seem to be stuck in a repeating pattern, which ultimately ensures that whilst we talk endlessly about climate change; we do very little that is useful, all the while getting closer to a point of no return.

Burchell Wilson, chief economist for the

Chamber of Commerce, was interviewed on the ABC the other day, and said that “the cost of the RET [Renewable Energy Targer] to average households is around $102 per annum.”5 He used this figure claim that the “RET is corporate welfare on a massive scale.”5 I am definitely not an economist, but I would consider this $102 that I have spent exceptionally well.

On the other hand, in 2010, the annual value of fossil fuel subsidies in Australia was valued at $7.7 billion. The largest of these subsidiaries are in the form of diesel fuel handouts to the miners, called the Fuel Tax Credits Scheme: this scheme equates to $182 per taxpayer every year (we are talking individual taxpayers here, not households like the RET).6

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The Abbott Government has recently announced a review into the RET. The head of the review is Dick Warburton, who stated last week in an interview that what he is sceptical about are “the claims that man-made carbon dioxide is the major cause of global warming”.

The other members of the four person review team are: Mark Zema, the CEO of Australian Energy

WATER

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Animal Husbandry Facility

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Market Operator (AEMO operates Australia’s National Electricity Market).

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Shirley In’t Veld, the former head of WA government-owned generation company Verve Energy.

By Raelene Hunt

And finally, Brian Fisher, the former long-term head of ABARE (Australian Bureau of Agriculture and Resource Economics) who gained notoriety for his positions on climate policies. Under Fisher, ABARE systematically produced modelling to demonstrate the massive costs to Australia of any action to mitigate carbon emissions. However, these models were often found to be highly misleading, and “came under severe criticism for what it included and for what it left out”1

F

Although it is possible that these four people will carry out the review with impartiality and concern for the future, the team does have a definite lean towards the fossil fuel industry and away from renewable energy. And since the RET review will examine clean energy impact on power prices, and not the long term benefits, or even the economic and environmental costs of staying with fossil fuels, then this seems to be yet another example of wasteful and expensive misdirection, something that we really cannot afford.

Bennett construction, an award winning commercial building company operating in Northern and North West NSW, have been approved as the Principal Building Contractor to build this component of the IAEP. The program of works begins with the demolition of some existing run-down and out-dated buildings before moving on to construction of the new facilities. Work is expected to be completed early 2015.

The politics behind our inaction on climate change are complex and convoluted and have become embedded in our Australian culture. Sadly, this could be our undoing. We all need to try and think and rethink this issue afresh, we need to learn the facts and learn what we can about it, and then do what needs to be done. It is not something that will go away on its own accord.

We are fast running out of ‘catch-up’ time. If we just keep doing what we are doing now, by the end of this century the world will be 4oC warmer than it is now.7 And this would indeed be catastrophic.

No matter how hard it is we need to ‘plant that tree’. If we leave it, it will just get harder. We collectively need to work towards a world of low carbon emissions, work towards a world of low pollution and toxicity, where our remaining natural resources remain in place because we are clever enough not to strip them bare.

More next time on what we as individuals can do, as well as what positive steps other countries around the world are taking.

1.

Scorcher, the Dirty Politics of Climate Change. Clive Hamilton.

2007. Published by Black Inc. Agenda 2.

Requiem for a Species, Why we Resist the Truth about Climate Change. Clive Hamilton. 2010. Allen & Unwin 3.

Merchants of Doubt. Naomi Oreskes & Erik Conway. 2010. Published by Bloomsbury Press 4. http://www.abc.net.au/4corners/content/2006/s1566257.htm 5. http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-02-17/government-to-review-renewable-energy-target/5265044 6. http://www.acfonline.org.au/be-informed/climate-change/fossil-fuel-subsidies 7. http://www.smh.com.au/environment/climate-change/climatechange-planet-to-warm-by-4-degrees-by-2100-20131231-304nw.html 8. http://co2now.org/current-co2/co2-now/

ollowing on from the recent opening of the Large Animal Facility work is due to commence on Phase 1b of the Animal Husbandry Facility in early March.

Funded by UNE, The Animal Husbandry Facility is one component of the $46 million Integrated Agricultural Education Project (IAEP) which includes $29 million dollars funding from the Commonwealth Government’s Education Investment Fund.

This key teaching, working and research component of IAEP includes: • New animal surgery • New teaching facilities including a 60 student teaching laboratory with viewing glass to the new animal surgery for teaching and demonstration • New milling and feed room • New sheep housing facilities with purpose-built quarantine and laboratory areas • New walkways linking the buildings • New sheep raceways improving links between buildings • State of the art environmental measures including air filtration, noise and pollution controls, water recapture and improved waste disposal The new Animal Husbandry Facility will provide UNE with animal facilities that are compliant with current Australian Standards, numerous animal ethics requirements and the Disability Discrimination Act. This modern infrastructure will allow for increased collaboration, research funding and student numbers ensuring UNE continues to provide outstanding graduates in the fields of agriculture and animal science whilst strengthening UNE’s already internationally recognised agricultural, environmental and animal science teaching and research.

More information about IAEP can be found at: https://staff.une.edu.au/ wiki/display/IAEP/INTEGRATED+AGRICULTURAL+EDUCATION+P ROJECT+-+HOME+PAGE

Below: Site Plan of the IAEP

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Creating art

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:)

by Ashley Pianca

Rainbow White Chocolate CocoNut Passionfruit Cheesecake

J

ohn Lennon once said, “When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life”.

Photo credit: Ashley Pianca

When I think of happiness I immediately think of colour and of course…food. So what better way to spread the highly aspired to feeling of happiness than with something that combines both of these things! This recipe is one of my personal creations that actually worked out just how I wanted it to. It is colourful and flavourful and perfect to share with friends. So go ahead and brighten someone’s day with this Rainbow of goodness!

Remember to send your recipe requests in to collegerecipes@outlook.com!

Base

Filling

About 500g if biscuits of your choice (I used a combination of Gingernuts and Honey Tiny

400g coconut cream

Teddy’s)

500g cream cheese, at room temperature

Enough melted butter to cover biscuits, approximately 125g

1 cup of caster sugar

Crush biscuits and place in a large bowl

2.

Stir in butter until mixture is well coated.

3.

Press into a large greased tin or container of your choice. I used a 22cm spring tin.

4.

Refrigerate.

4 passionfruits

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2.

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BBQ on Sat!

Combine cream cheese and coconut milk until combined. Stir in sugar and gelatine.

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kes you h ma Good food

Food colouring

1.

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2 ½ blocks of white chocolate

1.

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4 teaspoons of gelatine

Melt white chocolate in microwave until smooth, pour into cream cheese mixture and quickly stir.

3.

Separate mixture into seven small bowls or cups.

Colour the first mixture red and pour over base.

Place this in the freezer for 20 minutes. In the meantime colour the rest of the mixture. Orange followed by green, blue and purple. Leave the

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A warm bath

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- Jacinta H

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coloured filling in the fridge.

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next. Add passionfruit to the yellow mixture

Ashley is studying a Bachelor of Criminology/Bachelor of Laws and can’t go a day without listening to Beyonce.

4.

Do one layer at a time with twenty minute intervals until it is complete. Then freeze for three hours or overnight.

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(College) RecipeS

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In Those We Trust

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- Patricia P

By Elise Mottley

*Blake* “Yeah! Loner Wayne, you better run! No one here to help you now, you’ll have no one to watch your back as soon as you leave those school gates! Sleep with one eye open mate!”

Paying out kids, hurting them, putting them down, I do it to make myself feel better… make myself look tough. I do it so that they get the smallest taste of what my life is like. No one knows my parents; according to everyone at school I have none. I wish.

I’m angry, angry with them.

Wayne takes all the shit I give him! Ha…ha.

He doesn’t do anything to stop me, ever. I think that shows that the kid has guts. But not the kind of guts you need to survive with a family like mine.

I want to be like Wayne and less like me.

*Wayne* An open door. So welcoming. Mum’s so naïve.

She is in the kitchen.

Without taking her eye off what she’s doing, “How was school?” she asked-part of our daily routine.

“Umm it was okay, thanks for asking Mum.” I slide in the door and past the counter, aware of the damage from the encounter. Mum had not yet looked up at me.

Taking the plate of food from her, she looks towards my face and before I can take it from her, the plate falls, food and shattered pieces of plate go everywhere.

The shattering of the plate echoes the feelings in the room.

“Wayne! What happened to you? Where were you? Brad!! Come here quick!”

She’s a professional at worrying.

I turn to Dad, but before I can say anything to him, his eyes focus on my face.

“What happened to you Wayne?” a tone of accusation. There would be no point; dad had made up his mind.

“Mum. Dad. It’s nothing. I just came off my bike and the bike is broken, damn chain! But I’m fine, seriously.

Dad, could you take a look at the bike, tell me if it’s possible to fix or if we just take it to the dump?”

“Sit down now Wayne, I’m going to clean your face” “No way Mum, that shit stings, I’ll just get in the shower.”

She stands there with a full bottle of Detol and a handful of cotton wool balls; it’s as if she is ready to tip the bottle on me. That’s my cue to leave; wouldn’t want her to touch my shoulder, or my ribs for that matter.

That would be hard to explain.

She would go totally mental.

That prick, Blake!

*Elsie* “I always have to pick you up Karen, where have you been now? What have you been doing? Do I want to know? How much longer are you going to sneak around behind my back?” scathed Dad

CREATIVE WRITING

Weekends!

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“I don’t sneak behind…” murmured Mum. “Will you both just shut up? No one even cares anymore, not like we don’t know what you both get up to.” They could hear the frustration in my voice, staring at me with their beady eyes as if none of this is my business.

But it doesn’t stop him, nothing ever does…

I heard the brakes straining just to bring the car to a stop; I could smell the rubber burning off the tyres onto the tar as I screamed “STOP!” The car jerked to a halt, with only enough time for the young male to scamper off the road like an injured mouse. Scratches down the side of his face, pushing a broken bike as its chain dragged on behind keeping up with his adjusted pace.

He glanced back at me, with a desperate look on his face, a look that suggested that he didn’t want the car to have stopped.

“Watch the damn road! You could have hurt someone! Selfish bastard!”

Time to tune out now; I know where these arguments start and where they end but the difference with this argument is that I’m not planning to be around for the finish.

I can’t handle them anymore. They put so much on my shoulders and they don’t even care. No one does.

But I’m not sure how to do it.

To die.

But that is one thing that they cannot control.

The chain is going to break…

Elise is studying a BA, majoring in writing and sociology, and she enjoys sewing including making clothes from scratch and alternation, and also enjoys socialising with friends.

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Rocks!

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Penguins Jumper-ing for Joy!

-by the Tune!FM Fairy

F

getting caught in an oil spill is just the beginning of their problems. It

Eight ply Pattern

only takes a small patch of oil to separate out all their feathers and de-

Directions given Australia (U.K., USA)

or Little Penguins (“Little” being the species as well as the adjective),

stroy the natural oils. These oils are what keep heat in and water out. It’s damage

Method:

Apart from getting a job for an International Oil Company and working hard to improve safety standards and reduce oil spills, there is little you and I can do to help these critters… Until now!

The Penguin Foundation, an organisation working to protect the penguins of Phillip Island has a unique volunteering program you can get involved in from the comfort of your own home. Penguin jumpers are knitted attire for Little Penguins, designed to warm up the shivering oil-spill victim, prevent it from swallowing the oil and make it look super adorable as well.

While the jumpers aren’t needed every single day, stockpiling them helped the Foundation to save 96% of the 453 penguin victims of the 2001 oil spill near the island. They also send them away to other colonies, spreading the wooly love around the world.

Tune!FM is a collection point for penguin jumpers, and Uncle Tune wants YOU to send us your contribution. We’ve even included this handy pattern, for

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Driving

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Ru Paul’s Drag Race

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ma

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Get creative, get knitting and save a Little Penguin life!

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those of you not experienced in the manufacturing of avian knitwear.

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Endorphins

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dead as well.

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stance. Now not only is the penguin oily, messy, wet and cold, it’s quite possibly

-8 ply (D.K., Sport/Worsted) yarn -1 pr 3.75mm (no.9, US no.5)

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On top of all that, an oily penguin wants nothing more than to preen itself and repair the damage- a risky act that can lead to ingesting the poisonous sub-

at

You will need:

that’s difficult to recover from.

BACK:

- Cast on 36 sts.

- K1 P1 to the end of the row.

- Repeat for 7 more rows.

- Change to K2 P2 and inc. 8 sts. evenly across this row. (44sts.)

- Continue until the work measures 12cm.

- Dec. 1 st. each end of every row till 28 sts.

- Dec. one stitch in the middle of the next row. (27 sts) - Change to K1P1 rib for 10 rows. Cast off.

FRONT: Knit same as the Back.

- Using a flat seam join the neck edges together.(about 4cm) - Stitch the sides to the beginning of the upper decreasing (opening for each flipper). Side seam should be12cm approximately. Flipper opening about 4cm in length.

- Total length of finished jumper should be no more than 20cm, width should be 12cm.

REVIEW

AMERICAN HUSTLE American Hustle (2013)

By Stu Horsfield

Director: David O. Russell Starring: Christian Bale, Bradley Cooper, Jennifer Lawrence, Amy Adams, Jeremy Renner.

O

k so this is a fucking great movie, but it’s probably not what you expect. The ambiguous teaser trailer gives off a kind of 70’s Oceans 11 vibe, but if you’re expecting that standard plot where the old timey con men/women are getting ready for ‘one last big job’, then someone screws up and the star detective thinks he’s got everyone pinned until the very last scene where you find out OH WOW THAT WAS THE PLAN

THE WHOLE TIME(!!) and the detective is like ‘MY CAREER!’ and one of your friends is like ‘I saw that coming in like the first scene guys it was so obvious...’ and when you leave the cinema you realise you can’t remember anything significant about the plot except for the scene where that guy from that show gets stuck in an air vent and it was really tense… this is not one of those movies. While it definitely has elements of the over-done heist plot gimmick, it uses it more as a vehicle for the characters and refuses to sacrifice good writing for flashy twists. That was a good decision.

This is really an actor’s movie. While the plot is great, and thanks to its simplicity lacks a lot of the gaping holes that con/heist movies always have, it is the script and the quality of the acting that make this movie so great. The whole cast give huge, powerful performances, though Christian Bale and Jennifer Lawrence really stand out. The film captures that fast paced, decadent 70’s underworld aesthetic and memorable character driven scenes that made Boogie Nights so engaging. And, like with Boogie Nights, the plot sometimes takes a back seat to the characters and the weight of their interactions. David O. Russell created even more room for this by opting for a simpler narrative, a (for the most part) clear cut movement for the characters to explore and really flesh out within, and they do. Even the cameo characters are given meaningful expression; Louis CK has some great scenes facing off with Bradley Cooper, and over a few scenes delivers a painfully unresolved story that plays into the strange comedic tension in the film. Robert De Niro’s cameo was totally unexpected and delivers one of the tensest scenes from any movie I can remember.

As well as being fucking great, as I mentioned, this movie is also fucking hilarious. For the most part it is a serious drama with some really poignant moments, especially one scene between Bale and Jeremy Renner that should put your guts into your throat trying to hold back tears if you’ve got any feeling in you at all, but in a big way it’s a black comedy, and is extremely enjoyable.

I know I haven’t mentioned the actual plot of the film at all, and you may be like ‘ok dude that’s great, just shut up and tell me what the movie is about’, but shhh, trust me, just go see it.

4/5

25

The Adventures of Arabella Henderson UNE Time Detective Episode 4: Reading the Riot Act

By Kate Wood

Like Kate’s writing?

Check out her blog, where she promises you’ll find lots more to tide you over until the next episode of Arabella!

The Man In Room 13: www.themaninroom13. wordpress.com

IT WAS A TYPICAL MONDAY MORNING AT THE UNIVERSITY OF NEW ENGLAND

F

oxy ladies

Chancellor ran to assist him.

and groovy dudes were

‘Are you alright?’ asked Arabella, helping him to

lighting doobies in their

untangle his feet from his flares. ‘What’s going on in

college rooms. Students of

‘Perhaps a diplomatic solution?’ Arabella asked.

‘There’s enough destruction in here already, what with

there?’

arts, sciences and professions

the fourth wall being broken.’

‘Leave it to me,’ said Obama. ‘I was an angry student once. I understand these kids.’

were digging the hip scene on

Without so much as a thank you, the young man

campus. What was in? Enormous

began to run towards the Union Courtyard, screaming

He reached out and grabbed the arm of a passing

flares, fashionable hiking boots,

‘Police State! Oppression! Fight the Power!!!’ He was

rioter. ‘Yo, dude. This is a bogus scene. What’s the

clearly most verklempt.

skinny?’

reading the popular student newspaper Neucleus and, of course, protesting apartheid. It was February of 1977, the study break was over and The Man was on campus,

‘Gosh,’ said Vice Chancellor Obama. ‘That’s an ominous greeting!’

seeking out hoodlums and Commies.

Arabella didn’t believe that was real slang, but the student appeared to understand the Vice Chancellor perfectly. ‘It’s The Man, man! Apparently we can’t

Leaving their Time Bike safely locked to the rack,

borrow no library book without one of these new

On the lawns of the Dixson Library, three easy

where it blended seamlessly into the ordinary bikes

photographic ID cards. Oppression, man! Police state!’

going flower children watched as a time-travelling

around it, Arabella and Vice Chancellor Obama

tandem bicycle materialised a few metres away from

hurried into the library, shovels at the ready, to see if

them. They paid it little attention, since that kind of

they could be of any assistance.

thing happened all the time, as far as they were aware.

‘What’s so bad about a photo ID?’ asked Arabella.

‘Civil liberties, sister!’ he declared. ‘Once they have

Inside, they were confronted by a shocking scene.

our photo they could use it for anything!’

On the front seat of the bike sat Arabella Henderson,

A full scale riot was in progress. Like the young man

UNE’s foremost time detective. She had a shovel slung

outside, several students were yelling about a Police

Arabella had been issued with a photographic ID

over her shoulder, and a backpack filled with all the

State. Three women with braided headbands had

her first year of High School. She had three forms of

modern crime-solving equipment money can buy.

overturned a desk and were trying to set it on fire.

photo ID in her wallet at that very moment. It had

The UNE Mystery Solvers Club was of course the

As Arabella moved to stop them, she saw an elderly

never occurred to her that the Government might use

best funded club on campus, due to a very specific

librarian punch a boy with a Mohawk in the face.

it for something devious. This was a strange new form

amendment of SSAF funding guidelines, specifying that priority was to be given to “student organisations

of the Generation Gap, experienced only by Time ‘We should do something,’ Arabella said.

Travellers.

dedicated to solving crime and also to fund oncampus Chinese restaurants”. As a result, Arabella had

‘Perhaps a drone strike?’ asked Obama.

‘What would they use it for?’ asked Obama.

a great deal of expensive mystery solving apparatus and she was not afraid to use them.

‘Wouldn’t that hurt civilians?’ Arabella asked him.

‘I don’t know, man, but first they fine you for late returns and now this. Fight the Power!’

Her friend and colleague The General being busy

Obama shrugged. ‘Hardly seems to matter.’

replying to fan mail, Arabella was accompanied by the Vice Chancellor himself. Vice Chancellor Obama had once been the President of the United States, but he

As he ran away, Arabella and Vice Chancellor ‘Whoa!’ said Nucleus Editor Alana, reading over the first draft. ‘That got real political real fast!’

Obama looked at each other. It wasn’t a mystery as such, but rioting was a crime.

found it too easy and he had come to UNE for a faster pace.

‘Opinions expressed by the author are not the opinions of Nucleus, UNESA or the University of New

As the pair alighted from their bicycle, they were startled by a shattering of glass. The sound was out

backwards through a window of the library. He landed on a flower child, and Arabella and the Vice 26

Obama. ‘Reduce this one.’

England as a whole,’ said Nucleus Editor Bridgette, reading over her shoulder.

of place when contrasted with the calm susurrus of a Summer morning. A red-haired young man flew

‘You receive SSAF funding to reduce crime,’ said

Gazing around at the chaos of the library foyer, Arabella unslung her backpack and unzipped it. In the

‘It’s cool,’ said the author, ‘This is satire. I can do what I want.’ Then she continued with the story.

next edition of Nucleus, she was going to kick arse and take names…

To be continued . . .

SEE YA Sam Carter!

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- Deb G

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Chocolate milk and potato bake

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We didn’t write this, promise!

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No exams!

THE NUCLEUS!

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MINIONS! - Judd

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Finally submitting that assignment that’s given you grief for weeks

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ZUMBA

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Thank you for everything you did for the students at une, as well as us at nucleus. HAVE FUN ABROAD xx

- Kate O

Words with Judd Verklempt German is reputed to be the most romantic and tender of all European languages (*cough*). For this reason it seems only suiting that one of this weeks words encompasses the most tender part of the human psyche; emotions. And what better language than German!? This word is soft and gentle, smooth and sweet, loving and tender, it describes when a person is utterly overcome with emotion, it is of course VERKLEMPT. A word which sounds like a ballet dancer with her shoes tied together, a word which makes me think of two doves battling each other with bricks, a word which sounds of a hippopotamus in roller skates!

Verklempt! Oh! What a word!

Susurrus Sometimes I like to hide in the park to make strange and unexpected noises at passers-by. However, as is often the case, there is nobody willing to come near the strange looking bush with a person inside. It is during this time I am able to listen to the susurration of the local park trees. No, you have got me all wrong, susurration, though sounding like suspicious resuscitation actually refers to a soft whisper or rustling normally attributed to environmental elements like rivers or leaves. Similarly, the word susurrus describes the sound as its own individual entity. So when you are next frolicking naked in the woods, take the time to listen to the gentle susurrus and just look out for the man sitting in the bush pretending to be a bird.

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Help ME contriButor, you’re My only hope