Table of Content Reflective Essay Substantial Revision Genre Change Informal Essay 1 Informal Essay 2 Informal Essay 3
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Reflection Essay
When I first walked into English class I was not excited at all. English has never really been one of my strong points when it comes to school. Actually last year in school, my freshman year, I dropped out of my English 101 the first time I took it because I was not doing very well in it. This year I think that I have done better in an English class than I have done in a while. I completed all my work and did above average on most of the work that I have handed in. There were some things in class that I really enjoyed doing and found helpful when I came to completing my work.
I think that the class went very well this year; I liked how we worked a lot on peer reviewing all of our papers before we did are final drafts. This helped me a lot because I am not the best at knowing what I did wrong in my papers. Therefore when I had a couple of my peers in my class look over my work and show me what I need to fix to make my paper the best it can be it really helped a lot. Another part of class that I think was very affective was when we did the workshops on the different parts for the portfolio. Such as, when we had to cut out the important lines in are papers that really helped me come up with a great idea to write for my substantial revision. Another part of this class that I liked was when we had the conferences. I really like how this gave us as students a good understanding as to where we were in the class. It is always very refreshing when you know how you are doing in class. This way you know what you have to work on and what you are doing well on. I also like how if you were having trouble writing a paper you would help us come up with many different ideas so this way we know what we are going to do for are writing.
The reason that I chose to my ethnography as my substantial revision and my rhetorical analysis for my genre change was because these were the papers that I enjoyed writing the most throughout the year. I thought that I would use the ethnography because I wrote about wrestling; wrestling is a huge part of my life so I had a lot of interest in what I was writing and had a lot I could say. I chose my rhetorical analysis because I wanted to do an article on Rise against so I could learn more about them other than the one song that I know. I think that the class overall went very well this year and I think that I learned a lot about how to become a better writer. Even though I am not a huge fan of writing I thought that I wrote many interesting papers.
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Substantial Revision: Ethnography Essay
The Ways of Wrestlers Wrestling practice is a major part of my life and I am most interested in it because I used to go to Bloomsburg University of Pennsylvania before I transferred this year to the University at Buffalo. This fact led me towards studying the Bloomsburg wrestling program and how they train as a team but compete as individuals; how their training helps them and why they do it. Also, I wanted to study how the wrestlers continue to do what they do because of all the hardships a wrestler has to face, such as cutting weight, sometimes gaining weight, intensive drilling and training sessions. The camaraderie that a team develops through individuals bonding and wrestling together in matches and in the practice room helps lead to individual success because you have support from your teammates. While watching Bloomsburg practice, I see how drastically different each individual is in the way they do what they do. You can tell which wrestlers are working hard and which ones are hardly working. This would be the result of their intensity in practice on previous days and in the warm up. Believe it or not, the warm up is a huge part of the practice. This allows you to loosen up your muscles and get blood pumping through them to allow for a great workout. By watching the way in which each individual wrestler warms up, I can tell which ones are ready for practice and which ones are not.
Some are not doing as many gymnastic exercises to stretch out, some are not working on their stance and motion to warm up their legs, some are not even doing sprints to get their heart beating faster. The reason some of these guys are not going all out in their warm up is probably because they are sore from yesterdays practice. Maybe, they just are not feeling it today or they are tired. Either way, not getting a good warm up in is not a good thing to do for your body. By getting in a good warm up you can practice to your full potential. After the warm up, I begin to examine each wrestler as they are drilling with their partners. The head coach is yelling commands, so that they do what he wants them to do. While watching these guys wrestle, I notice which ones have great mental attitudes for the day and which ones have a lot of energy. Those that are here with great mental attitudes are drilling as hard as ever and they are constantly trying to get better at each drill they are doing. They are getting the maximum number of repetitions they can for each move. You can see which ones are focused just by looking in their eyes. They have this look to them that is kind of menacing looking. By getting the most repetitions out of each drill you can tell those who have the most energy. They are not dogging it and they are always moving.
Some who are working hard do not even have partners that are working hard. Because of this those who are working hard are trying to get their partners to work hard as well by becoming hard nosed and mean. This may not necessarily sound like a good thing, but it really is because it promotes competition in the room, which makes each person better. This leads to them having individual success outside of the wrestling room and in front of a crowd. From here, the team moves straight in to wrestling live. Here you can tell who is the toughest guy in the room. This is because he is fighting for every position and striving to always win. This also allows for competition and drives individuals to work harder. Once again this promotes individual success as a result of help from the team. After they are finished wrestling live, I finally get my opportunity to interview a couple of the members of the team, so that I can get a little bit of feedback on what they think helps them perform. My first interview is with Sean Boylan who is Bloomsburg’s starting 125 pounder. The main question I asked him was about how he can cut so much weigh but still have the drive to do well in practice and competition as well as in the class room. Sean stated how he has been wrestling just about all of his life and that wrestling is what he loves to do.
He is able to cut so much weight and still perform because he has the support from his family, friends, teammates, and coaches. This is what drives him everyday and as a result he works to the best of his ability. He even said that sometimes he does not want to get out of bed in the morning, but in the end that he does and everything works out. He will have a great practice and a good day. It is mornings like these where you truly have to get up out of bed because there is competition out there who have started training at this time or that have even slept in. It is your duty to get ahead of them he believes. Boylan also mentions the fact that he believes he is successful because of the support he has from his team and everyone else in his life. It is his support that drives him to be successful which relates back to the idea that team support is what leads to individual success. The next person I interviewed was Josh Veltre who is a senior and Bloomsburg’s starting 165 pounder. Last year, Veltre finished 9th in the country. The question I asked him was about how he thinks the team has helped him to come so far as an individual. He replied by saying that the best friends he has are his teammates and it is their support that allows him to be great. He believes that by having great relationships with your teammates, you are all able to push each other in the wrestling room and can have better practices. This leads to becoming better as individuals and then being more successful. “By having the team behind you supporting and pushing you all the way through the tough times and hardships, you really grow as an individual and find that you will earn more victories.� This is one statement that Veltre said and I though that it really hit home with what I am trying to portray. Individual success is met as the result of hard work and dedication, which comes, in part, from the support of your teammates.
As one can see, this all comes back to being close with the team and it helps each individual in all aspects of wrestling and college. By becoming closer with you college wrestling teammates, you each develop a sense of support from each other. Most everyone wants their teammates to succeed and this drives each individual to work harder and longer than their competition. Victories are seen more often as a result. Some people may agree with this whereas others may not which is dependent upon the individual. Many things can be observed as someone talks to college wrestlers and as their practices are observed; this demonstrates college wrestlers as being in a community. This community of wrestlers creates success in individuals. Supporting each other and becoming great friends allows individuals to push each other and they as a result they achieve individual success.
Genre Change: Rhetorical Analysis Rise Against Rise Against is an American punk/hardcore band that was formed in 1999 by Tim McIlrath and Joe Principe (PunkNews.org). The band originates from Chicago, Illinois and was created after the fall of the band known as 88 Fingers Louie (PunkNews.org). Originally, the band was known as Transistor Revolt, but changed its name to Rise Against in 2001 (PunkNews.org). The band initially consisted of lead singer Tim McIlrath, bassist Joe Principe, guitarist Dan Precision, and drummer Toni Tintari. The members of Rise Against have changed throughout the years and today the members are lead singer Tim McIlrath, guitarist Zach Blair, bassist Joe Principe, and drummer Brandon Barnes (Rise Against). Although McIlrath and Principe have been members the whole time, the guitarist has changed multiple times, and there have been a few different drummers. 
Rise Against has released six major albums to date and they have been met with a wide array of success, not only with fans, but critics as well. While known as Transistor Revolt, the band released a demo album called Transistor Revolt in 2000 (PunkNews.org). This was done when the band was independent from any record label. Eventually, in 2001, Rise Against signed with Fat Wreck and released its first true album The Unraveling (All Music). By 2002, the band had released its second album Revolutions Per Minute (All Music). Because of the success that it received based on fans and critics, the band decided to leaf Fat Wreck and signed with Dreamworks (All Music). In 2004, Rise Against released its first successful album, Siren Song of the Counter Culture (All Music). This album actually made it on to the Billboard Top 200 at number 136 (All Music). While releasing the albums, Rise Against did do some touring, starting with Warped Tour and working its way up to the U.K. Leeds festivals in 2005 (All Music). In July 2006, their fourth album was released, The Sufferer and the Witness, which made in onto the Billboard Top 200 at number 10(All Music). They also continued to tour mostly with Warped Tour, but eventually started playing with Thursday and Billy Talent (All Music). By 2008, Rise Against had released its most successful album at the time, Appeal to Reason, which cracked the Billboard Top 200 at number 3 (All Music). Eventually, they one-upped themselves again by releasing their most successful album to date, Endgame (All Music). Endgame made it onto the Billboard Top 200 at the number 2 spot. The four main albums that Rise Against had released, as well as being on the Billboard Top 200 had made it onto other various charts, such as Top Hard Rock Albums, Top Rock Albums, and Top Canadian Albums (All Music). Rise Against is still going strong today and just recently finished touring in the United Kingdom (Rise Against). A new album is set to release by next year, 2014 (Rise Against).
The members of the band are very active with problems in today’s society. Each member of the band is actually a vegetarian (Rise Against). Excluding Brandon Barnes they are all also straight edge, meaning they do not use alcohol, tobacco, or other recreational drugs (Rise Against). The members of the band are also supporters of PETA and they advocate for progressive organizations, such as Amnesty International and It Gets Better Project (Rise Against). Along with these organizations, Rise Against supports various other programs that are trying to make the United States and the world a better place. Currently, they are promoting Demand a Plan, which addresses the issues of gun violence in the United States. This program is trying to create a plan that would help solve the problems there are with gun violence in memory of the tragedy in Newtown, which was an elementary school shooting (Rise Against). Rise Against has actually incorporated tragic events into their songs in order to try and send a message to people. The two songs in which this can be easily seen is “Make It Stop (September’s Children)” from their album Endgame and “Hero of War” from their album Appeal to Reason. The most recent song, “Make It Stop (September’s Children)” was created in order to send a message about bullying specifically towards homosexuals (Rise Against). They released this song after tragic suicides of homosexual individuals who were still in their teens. These individuals were picked on for being homosexual and as a result found the only way to finally end it was to end their lives.
Rise Against actually mentions the names and ages of these individuals towards the end of the song in remembrance of these individuals. The message they portray in this song is actually said straight in the title, “Make It Stop.” They are hoping to put an end to all bullying especially that towards homosexuals. The thought process they probably had was that if their listeners participated in these activities maybe they would realize how wrong it is from one of their favorite bands. Rise Against released their song “Hero of War” to send individuals a message about some of the soldiers that go to war. Rise Against specifically wrote this song about individuals in Afghanistan because there was a murder of a couple native individuals (Rise Against). This murder had happened at the hands of American soldiers. As a result, they tried to send the message that some if not all of the American soldiers that go to war are not heroes like people see them to be. These soldiers are faced with many difficult challenges while they are deployed and often times are not always the same when they come back. The fact that they are mentally distraught from what they have seen leads those individuals to believe they are not heroes even if they are. What Rise Against tries to say though is that some of those who believe they are heroes may not be because of bad decisions they have made. Ultimately, Rise Against sends powerful messages through their music and actions.
Rise Against is a very popular punk/hardcore band mostly in the United States, but even in different countries around the world. Their music has been very successful throughout the years and it continues to become more and more enjoyed by all. The messages they send individuals are certain to have changed many minds of the people who listen to their music. Because they are also involved in organizations that are trying to change the world, many may be partaking in these organizations as well to follow them. Rise Against has the ability to change not only the United States, but also the world because of its influences.
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Reading Response #1
In the sport world there are different teams and each team has a group of coaches. Wrestling is a little different than just a normal sports team though, you don’t only compete as a team but you compete for yourself. How does training as team and competing for yourself help you win? Or is it better to train privately if you are going to compete for yourself? How do you overcome all the hardships that you have to go through as wrestling is it because of your team or is it because of yourself? I chose to pick wrestling because I have been around wrestling my whole life. I am actually a wrestler myself. I decided to observe my old team that I used to be on last year and that was Bloomsburg University. I thought it would be good to look at this group of people because I was familiar with the culture so I would understand what they were talking about when I had to interview them. There are many questions that you could ask someone about this sport; a lot of people do not always agree with how wrestlers do certain things such as cutting weight and other hardship involved in the sport but it works for them. I am going to interview a few guys from the team and ask them how they overcome all there hardships. How they get along with their teammates and how it helps them become as successful as they are. Thankfully, I know a lot about the culture already so I have a lot I can write about in this essay. I will also be able to put some of my own input into what they have to say which I think will help with making sense of what they are trying to say to us.
Reading Response #4
The TV show that breaks down a stereotype is the show called Blue Mountain State. It gives an image of college athletes; in this show it shows a college football team and what they do in school what they do on the field and how they act overall as a group. In one of the episodes I present’s other students doing work for them, and never having to take test their own test because if they do they won’t get a good grade. For example on the football team each player has their own "nerd" that does there work for them and takes there test. These “nerds” will go to class for the players, they will meet with the players every day and they will do their homework that have for the day, and they will go take every test for them no matter what class it is. It also shows that all athletes do is play there sport and party; they go to practice go home go to sleep and then have a party every night of the week. But in real life none of this ever happens. Athletes go to class do their own work and take their own test just like every other student in school. But on top of all that they have practice twice a day, therefore it makes school twice as hard. Sadly, that is what people think of athletes today and because so many people think this, some students tend to not like the athletes as much because of the stereotypes about us. If you are athlete and you do all of the things that these athletes do in this show you will only make it as an athlete for about one semester. This is because you will either be kicked of your team or get kicked out of school.
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Reading Response #6
The essay that I want to do the substantial revision on is my ethnographic essay. One thing that I need to work on changing in this essay is, I need to work on how I am using my wording. The most important thing that I feel I need to work on is I need to change my thesis. I feel that I need to make my thesis, how being close with your team can help you become a successful wrestler. In my essay that’s what I discuss most, not how training as a team can help you compete and win when you wrestle as an individual and it can help you overcome all the hard ships that you have to go through which was my thesis that I had first. I think when we cut out the 9 sentences in class the other day that this helped me a lot with finding out how to fix my ethnographic essay. This gave me the idea to change my thesis so that I can write a better paper that will make more sense. This also helped me create a very detailed outline which allowed me to write a very well done first draft. I was able to come up with better ideas which made it a lot easier to write the essay and normally coming up with ideas is a problem that I run into when it comes to writing papers.