August 31, 2016 - Pittsburgh City Paper by Pittsburgh City Paper

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

EVENTS 9.16 – 8pm TQ LIVE! The Warhol theater Co-presented with Trans-Q Television, a project of Carnegie Mellon University’s Center for the Arts in Society. Produced by Scott Andrew and Suzie Silver. Tickets $10/$8 Members & students

9.29 – 11am POP GENERATION: ANDY’S ANTIQUITIES For the generation that inspired Warhol, Pop Generation features educational tours exclusively for older adults, age 65 and over. Email popgeneration@warhol.org or call Leah Morelli at 412.237.8389. Tickets $10/FREE Members

9.30 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: AN EVENING WITH JOAN SHELLEY The Warhol theater This performance is co-presented with Calliope: The Pittsburgh Folk Music Society. FREE parking in The Warhol lot Tickets $15/$12 Members & students; visit www.warhol.org or call 412.237.8300

10.7 – 7pm SENSORY-FRIENDLY EVENT FOR ADULTS (21+) There is a 20 person limit for the event, and registration is required. To register please contact Leah Morelli at morellil@warhol.org or call 412.237.8389. FREE

Yo La Tengo with special guest Lambchop 9.14 – 8pm Carnegie Music Hall (Oakland) | Tickets $20/$15 Members & students visit www.warhol.org or call 412.237.8300

The Warhol and WYEP welcomes back Yo La Tengo, one of the most respected and unwavering bands in independent music. For over 30 years and 14 albums the group has charted its own course. As mentioned in a Stereogum review, “In the best possible sense, Yo La Tengo can feel less like a band and more like a beloved national trust.” Similar to Television, which played the Carnegie Music Hall last fall, Yo La Tengo sits prominently on the trajectory of bands inﬂuenced by the Velvet Underground and its impact on rock music in the 60s. This unique evening also features the highly praised Nashville band Lambchop (led by songwriter Kurt Wagner), which has deftly subverted and honored traditions of country music for almost 20 years. On this rare and special occasion, both bands pull from their extensive catalogs, as well as perform new material and collaborate on each other’s songs. NEWS

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10.8 – 10am SENSORY-FRIENDLY EVENT FOR TEENS AND YOUNG ADULTS Join us for a sensory-friendly program designed speciﬁcally for teens 14 to 21 years old with autism spectrum disorders and those with sensory sensitivities. There is a 20 person limit for the event, and registration is required. To register please contact Leah Morelli at morellil@warhol.org or call 412.237.8389. FREE

The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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“Exciting,Provocative…” – Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

T. P E S S D N E S! Y A D L FINA

The Pittsburgh presentation is made possible through the generous support of UPMC Health Plan. Additional support is provided by PNC.

Major exhibition program support is provided by the Richard King Mellon Foundation.

THEFRICKPITTSBURGH.ORG Killer Heels: The Art of the High-Heeled Shoe is organized by the Brooklyn Museum.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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Image: Prada. Wedge Sandal in Rosso, Bianco and Nero Leather (detail). Spring/Summer 2012. Leather. Courtesy of Prada USA Corp. Photo: Jay Zukerkorn.

08.31/09.07.2016 VOLUME 26 + ISSUE 35

[EDITORIAL] Editor CHARLIE DEITCH News Editor REBECCA ADDISON Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Music Editor MARGARET WELSH Associate Editor AL HOFF Multimedia Editor ASHLEY MURRAY Web Producer ALEX GORDON Staff Writers RYAN DETO, CELINE ROBERTS Interns STEPHEN CARUSO, MEGAN FAIR, TYLER DAGUE, WILLIAM LUDT, LUKE THOR TRAVIS

[ART] Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI {COVER PHOTO BY LISA CUNNINGHAM}

[COVER STORY]

“Come the start of the season, we’ll be ready.” PAGE 16

[ADVERTISING] Director of Advertising JESSIE AUMAN-BROCK Senior Account Executives PAUL KLATZKIN, JEREMY WITHERELL Advertising Representatives ERICA MATAYA, DANA MCHENRY Classified Manager ANDREA JAMES National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

[NEWS]

[MARKETING+PROMOTIONS]

Is greater accountability needed at the Port Authority Police Department?

Marketing Director DEANNA KONESNI Marketing Design Coordinator LINDSEY THOMPSON

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Circulation Director JIM LAVRINC Office Administrator RODNEY REGAN Administrative Assistant STEPHANIE DRISCOLL Interactive Media Manager CARLO LEO

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“Ed has just gone above and beyond what has been thought possible.” PAGE 39

News 06 Weird 14 Music 32 Arts 39 Events 44 Taste 48 Screen 52

Sports 54 Classifieds 56 Crossword 57 Free Will Astrology 59 Savage Love 60 The Last Word 62 NEWS

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“THE CHIEF SHOULD NOT BE THE SOLE ACCOUNTABILITY OFFICER.”

THIS WEEK

ONLINE

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What’s the most bone-crushing sport in the city? It might be roller derby, where the skaters have monikers like “Captain Crash” and bruises are called “derby kisses.” See our photo slideshow at www.pghcitypaper.com.

See what we do to this Tom Brady action figure at www.pghcitypaper.com

On our podcast this week, we talk local sports rivals. Have you attended a wedding where people yelled “Eat Shit Pitt”? One CP staffer has.

{CP PHOTO BY ASHLEY MURRAY}

Port Authority Police officers making an arrest near Downtown’s Wood Street T station

On Soundcloud, or at www.pghcitypaper.com.

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HIS PAST JANUARY, Bruce Kelley Jr. Port Authority ofﬁcers arrested ﬁve teen-

T Our featured Reflections photo from last week is by Instagrammer @nayburgh17. This week’s theme is Black and Gold, in honor of our Steelers Issue. Tag your Black and Gold Pittsburgh photos with #CPReaderArt, and we just may re-gram you. Each of the three readers we choose this week on our feed wins one of our Steelers dolls from our cover story!

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was fatally shot by Allegheny County Port Authority Police. He was approached by officers for allegedly drinking in public and was ultimately shot after stabbing a Port Authority police dog. This was the most high-profile case involving Port Authority police in recent memory. The Allegheny County District Attorney’s office stepped in to help investigate, as is protocol in officer-involved shootings like these, according to DA spokesperson Mike Manko. In June, the DA released a thorough 12-page report, complete with a summary, medical examiner’s evidence and a discussion section. The DA ruled Port Authority officers were justified in shooting Kelley. The whole process took four months. A month before the shooting of Kelley,

agers after a ruckus broke out at the Wood Street T station Downtown. At least four of the ﬁve boys’ cases never went to trial. As former refugees from East Africa, and

Activists are concerned Allegheny County Port Authority Police aren’t being held accountable {BY RYAN DETO} of Somali Bantu ancestry, the boys’ family told City Paper in December 2015 they were discriminated against due to their ethnicity. In response to the family’s claims, Port Authority said: “We have reviewed the incident at length with our police chief and

have found nothing about our ofﬁcers’ handling of the situation to be problematic or contrary to their training.” Unlike the lengthy Kelley investigation, this review took only a few days. These two high-proﬁle cases involving the Port Authority Police had drastically different investigation processes and have sounded the alarm of local police-accountability advocates. There is currently no external, internal or governmental agency dedicated to investigating Port Authority police incidents, and transparency at the authority’s police force is limited “With the state of the lack of trust and tension between the police and community, transparency is a must,” says Brandi Fisher of the Alliance for Police Accountability. “When you have a system that only involves the police investigating police, CONTINUES ON PG. 08

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

Party around the clock. Nine epic hours of entertainment and activities celebrating the launch of Carnegie Museum of Art’s LIGHTIME, including the unveiling of a new interactive photography installation on the museum's main plaza. NIGHTIME is the right time.

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7 p.m.–4 a.m. SEP 9 2016

Enjoy food trucks, art galleries, live performances, and activities for the whole family from 7–10 p.m. Then, CMOA goes 18+ until 4 a.m. with dance party vibes for late-night revelers. Tickets available at cmoa.org $25 ($20 members, $15 students, $10 children)

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CMOA's Hillman Photography Initiative is an incubator for innovative thinking about photography.

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then you are going to have trust issues.” In January, after the Wood Street incident, Fisher met with Port Authority police chief Matt Porter to discuss the authority’s accountability measures, and will meet with Allegheny County Executive Rich Fitzgerald soon to talk about the use of K-9 officers and accountability in the Port Authority police department. Fisher says she is dissatisfied with the unit’s accountability measures, particularly the lack of an independent review. She says that when complaints are issued, they are sent directly to the chief. He and two of his highest-ranking lieutenants review them and decide how to move forward. Fisher says this constitutes the old standard of “police agencies investigating themselves.” “It’s [Porter’s] process, so who knows how he handles that,” says Fisher. “He indicated to me that he is the accountability process. … Because of what happened in the Bruce Kelley case, we believe he is not a person who we can rely on for integrity and accountability. The chief should not be the sole accountability officer.” Port Authority Police officially started in 1982, under Pennsylvania’s Railroad and Street Railway Police Act, with just over a dozen officers. They were given full arrest powers and can act the same as any other police department in the state. Today, the unit has between 40 and 45 officers and should be adding several more when the police start patrolling light-rail T cars in 2017. While Port Authority police mostly patrol their highest-activity areas, like subway stations and along the county’s busways, the unit has authority to make arrests related to Port Authority’s entire system. So its jurisdiction can take officers all around and even beyond the county, as some bus routes enter Beaver and Westmoreland counties. The authority’s police force is around the same size as Penn Hills’ and Mount Lebanon’s police departments; in the region, only Pittsburgh and Allegheny County police units are larger. According to Port Authority police arrest records obtained by CP, the force made 3,865 arrests from 2013 to 2015. That averages to about 32 arrests per officer, per year, over that span. The Pittsburgh Police, at around 900 officers, averaged about 21 arrests per officer, per year over the same span; Mount Lebanon officers averaged 13 arrests per year over a three-year span from 2011-2013 (the last year data was made public).

Despite these comparatively high arrest averages and the force’s large jurisdiction, little information is publicly available about the more than 30-year-old Port Authority police unit. The authority’s main website shows no police annual reports, nor has the authority ever conducted an audit of its police unit. Additionally, a separate Port Authority police website is riddled with dead links and offers a link to a message from the Port Authority chief which says that the message “is on its way, stay safe and stop back,” next to a photo of a man who is not the current chief. Pittsburgh’s own nationally recognized policing expert, University of Pittsburgh professor David Harris, even told CP that he too is unfamiliar with the unit. “I really don’t know anything about the [Port Authority] police,” he wrote to CP in January. Fisher, too, has struggled to understand the mysteries surrounding Port Authority police. She says the department has no transparency or community engagement, and she is still unsure who holds the unit accountable. “If there is an accountability system above him,” she says of Chief Porter, “he did not make it clear [to me] what it is or what it can do.” Port Authority denied CP’s request to interview Chief Porter directly, but spokesperson Adam Brandolph answered questions via email on the authority’s’ accountability measures. “When the need for an internal investigation arises, Port Authority has a process in place for its command staff to function as its internal investigation unit. If a complaint is deemed credible, the police department command staff also have Port Authority’s human-resources department, legal department and senior management officers to assist them and provide advice and guidance,” he wrote. Fisher says there are many problems associated with only the chief and highranking officers deciding which cases are worthy of review, because concerned citizens and advocates are solely dependent on them to make the right call. Beth Pittinger, of Pittsburgh’s Citizen Police Review Board, says multiple highprofile police cases in the 1980s and ’90s caused the community to demand some accountability from the Pittsburgh police, which led to the creation of an independent review board. She says this board is due for an expansion. “We have all these police agencies operating in this city and we only have jurisdiction over one of them,” says Pittinger.

“WITH THE STATE OF THE LACK OF TRUST AND TENSION BETWEEN THE POLICE AND COMMUNITY, TRANSPARENCY IS A MUST.”

CONTINUES ON PG. 10

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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Do you smoke cigarettes but only on some days? You may be eligible to participate in a research study for non-daily smokers. Earn at least $300 upon completion. For more information and to see if you’re eligible, call the Smoking Research Group at the University of Pittsburgh at

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Meet Former Pro Football Player Ricky Williams!

Do You Shop at Convenience Stores? Have you ever purchased energy drinks, cookies, or cigarettes from a convenience store? If so you may be eligible for a research study. The RAND Corporation, in Pittsburgh, is conducting a research study to learn about what ADULTS, ages 18-65, buy at convenience stores. Participation requires completion of a 10 minute phone or internet survey, one 90 minute visit to the RAND study center, and a short follow-up phone call. People who complete the study will be compensated for their time and effort with $75 in gift cards. Parking or bus passes will be provided. If you are interested and want to learn more about the study, please call 412-204-7353, e-mail adult-cstore-study@rand.org or visit us at www.rand.org/storestudy. The RAND Corporation is a nonprofit institution that helps improve policy and decision making through research and analysis.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

{CP PHOTO BY REBECCA ADDISON}

Abdulkadir Abdi being arrested following the Wood Street ruckus in December 2015

“When it is the same government and the same taxpayers, you have to find a way to make it happen.” CPRB is currently unable to investigate cases involving Port Authority officers, even when cases occur within Pittsburgh limits. Pittinger says that if the board were given umbrella powers to look into the Kelley and Wood Street cases, it would have done so. She says relying on the DA to investigate potential criminal acts of Port Authority police isn’t sufficient. “Misconduct is not always an unlawful act, but it is often offensive,” says Pittinger. “But because of how laws are written now, we are not always able to hold officers accountable.” The problem lies in Port Authority’s oversight. Although the authority receives the vast majority of its funding from the state government, it is governed by Allegheny County’s authority system. This means the state’s Inspector General office — which is responsible for investigating fraud, waste, abuse and misconduct — cannot investigate it. Allegheny County Controller Chelsa Wagner has been attempting to audit county authorities for years, but the county’s current rules don’t allow her office to do so. She sued the authorities in March 2015 to gain access, but lost a challenge in court later in the year. Wagner refers to county authorities like Port Authority as “shadow governments.” “Authorities were historically set up to get the benefit of governments without the responsibility of government,” says Wagner. “When it comes to economic development, I think there is some justified rationale in that, but at the same time, I think it

has spun out of control.” She says the authorities’ structure is problematic given their size (the combined budgets of all county authorities is larger than the county’s budget) and potential conflicts of interest (many county employees serve on authority boards). Their structure also exempts them from reviews by Allegheny County’s ethics and accountability commission because the commission is charged only with investigating county employees and elected officials. “That is one of the biggest problems with the ethics law as it is written right now,” says Wagner. “It needs to be rewritten.” Without an external agency looking into Port Authority police-conduct issues, concerned citizens rely on the authority to take actions internally. But the authority’s police unit doesn’t have an internal-affairs unit to look into potential misconduct cases. Port Authority’s Brandolph says that more than 80 percent of all police departments in the U.S. have 50 or fewer police officers, and most don’t have the resources for an internal-affairs department or a citizen police-review board. Brandolph says Port Authority doesn’t believe there is a need to establish an external review board, given the authorities’ small number of citizen complaints (just six in 2015). And Brandolph says that given the size of the authority’s police unit, an internal-affairs unit isn’t necessary. “Much like the vast majority of smaller, specialized police departments in the U.S., the Port Authority Police Department does not have an internal-affairs office,” wrote Brandolph. “The Port Authority Police Department does, however, accept citizen

complaints that are processed and fully investigated by the department’s command staff, similar to how an internal affairs office or unit would handle such complaints.” But Port Authority police do have a comparable, if much larger, agency within the state. With around 260 officers, the Southeastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority police unit — which was also formed under the railroad and street-rail police act of 1982 — patrols Philadelphia and its surrounding counties. Though SEPTA also lacks an external review board, it does have an internal-affairs department. SEPTA police chief Tom Nestel corresponded with CP via email and says that his internal-affairs office consists of two fulltime officers and another 13 officers to help with investigations when needed. “The benefit of having supervisors dedicated specifically to [internal affairs] and not relying on the Chief or another executive staff member to personally conduct the investigations is that quality control and auditing of behavior is constant and not periodic,” wrote Nestel. Nestel says SEPTA also doesn’t receive a large number of complaints from citizens but his internal-affairs officers investigate

violations of conduct policy that are generated by internal reports and complaints. The officers also engage in quality-control audits and conduct random reviews of the SEPTA police’s newly installed body cameras. But Brandolph says that comparing Port Authority with SEPTA and other larger departments is not appropriate. “It is categorically wrong for City Paper to compare the Port Authority police department to departments that have many more officers and resources,” wrote Brandolph. “SEPTA’s police department has nearly 260 officers. Pittsburgh’s police department has more than 800 officers.” Ultimately, Pittinger says that if there are going to be changes at Port Authority police and other county police agencies, the people are going to have to demand it. She says county residents can pressure county government for legislation to create another citizen review board, or to allow Pittsburgh CPRB to expand and investigate more cases involving nonPittsburgh police units. “We have all the tools necessary to maintain public order,” says Pittinger. “We just aren’t using them very well.”

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MEDICAL MARIJUANA

Here’s what you need to know about this burgeoning industry {BY REBECCA ADDISON} After a years-long battle in the state legislature, medical marijuana is coming to Pennsylvania. In April, Gov. Tom Wolf signed a bill legalizing medical marijuana, and patients here are expected to be able to use the drug by 2018. City Paper talked to Dan Clearfield, a regulatory attorney launching a series of webinars for those interested in the medical-marijuana industry in our state. It won’t be as exciting as the Gold Rush out west, but here are seven things you need to know if you’re interested in this burgeoning industry.

Banks have resisted working with medical-marijuana companies because federal law prohibits banks and credit unions from taking marijuana money. “It’s harder than another business to find a bank,” Clearfield says. “More and more banks are starting to work with state-authorized medical-marijuana organizations, but discussions with potential clients are still a big issue.” In Colorado, where medical marijuana has been legal for 14 years, state officials say 40 percent of cannabis businesses are run without a bank account.

Medical marijuana is a highly speculative market. “There are no good, well established, readily identifiable metrics,” says Clearfield. “Usually when you start a business like this, the first thing you do is figure out what the potential market is, and that doesn’t exist because so much of the market is either illegal or not comparable.” Consumer attitudes toward marijuana use vary greatly across states. For instance, Colorado legalized medical marijuana in 2002, but then went on to legalize recreational marijuana in 2014, so revenues there would not likely reflect Pennsylvania’s.

Medical marijuana is still illegal under federal law. “You could potentially be prosecuted, just for running your business, under federal law,” Clearfield says. “When you get in this business, you have to be acutely aware that there are risks.” Congress has defunded prosecutions of state-authorized medical-marijuana programs, but that defunding ends in September. “It’s not clear that a federal court would recognize your contract as being valid if it’s for the purpose of selling, delivering or processing medical marijuana,” Clearfield says.

Pennsylvania’s legislation is unique because it includes funding for research, and this could lead to advancements in the application of medical marijuana. “There’s been a lot of research in other countries and less research in the United States,” says Clearfield. “That could have a big effect on the industry. Some of the issues the industry continues to face are dosing: Exactly how much and which strain is better? There’s still a lot of research that’s needed. Another question is what kind of delivery method is better.”

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Successful applications for medical-marijuana licenses require support from the host community. “One of the most important things in the licensing process is you have to be able to show you have a location that’s suitable, that meets all the criteria — and there’s lots of them — and that the local community is accepting, that they’re comfortable with a medical-marijuana organization running a processing operation at that location or a dispensary at that location,” says Clearfield. “Local support is going to be very, very important.”

The medical-marijuana industry likely won’t create new opportunities for small and minority businesses or pioneering entrepreneurs. “The primary reason for doing this was to make sure patients have access to this product, so this isn’t an opportunity for startups,” says Clearfield. Pennsylvania’s law, as in some other states, does have a diversity component asking state officials do minority outreach. “They want to see diversity in your operation,” says Clearfield. “So you want to put together a team that’s more diverse.” But other than requiring the Pennsylvania Department of Health to create a report in 2018 about diversity in the state’s medical-marijuana industry, there are no mandates for diversity.

In order to be involved in a medical-marijuana operation, you cannot have been convicted of a drug-related offense. “That may sound reasonable, but they don’t distinguish between felonies and misdemeanors,” says Clearfield. “So if 30 years ago you pled guilty to a misdemeanor of possessing drug paraphernalia, because you had papers in your backpack when you went to a concert, you’re out. That’s relevant mostly because this is initially going to attract people who have had experience with medical marijuana, either in terms of their own use or in terms of business in other states.” RNUTTALL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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PET of the WEEK Photo Credit: Animal Friends

Twitch Meet Twitch, a handsome 5-year-old Havana. With his rich, gorgeous black coat, it’s easy to see why he is a fan favorite among visitors to Animal Friends. This lovable boy is in search of a loving new home after his previous owner could no longer give him the care and attention he needs. Twitch doesn’t care to be picked up, but he’ll gladly snuggle up next to you, especially if you’ve got a handful of his favorite treats – his personal favorites are dandelion greens, dehydrated bananas and all types of hay. If you’re curious about adding a great rabbit to your family, please stop by Animal Friends or go online to ThinkingOutsideTheCage.org/Rabbits to meet Twitch today!

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A feud between two Penn State sorority sisters has landed in federal court. The Philadelphia Inquirer reports that Rachel Lader filed suit against Molly Brownstein, her Alpha Sigma Alpha sister, along with Brownstein’s parents and the university, for alleged defamation and breach of contract. The dispute seems to have started when the two were roommates studying abroad in Barcelona. They clashed over the volume of Lader’s music and Brownstein’s messiness. Tensions mounted when Lader allegedly left a colander of pasta on Brownstein’s bed, as a statement on her supposed slovenliness, and later invited a young man to a hotel room they shared in Prague, causing Brownstein to vacate. (In her lawsuit, Lader said he was just a friend who’d locked himself out of his own room.) The suit alleged that Brownstein’s parents used their influence as Penn State donors to convince the school to charge Lader with harassment, a violation of the student code of conduct. (Brownstein’s mom wrote an eightpage memo for Penn State’s case file, entitled “A Mother’s Perspective,” detailing all the ways in which Laden supposedly wronged her daughter.) Before the Spain trip, the two then-friends signed a lease for an apartment. Penn State agreed to cease disciplinary action if Laden dropped out of the lease, but both she and Brownstein refused to give up the apartment. Both accused the other of inflicting extreme distress. In a statement to Penn State, Brownstein claimed Lader’s actions caused her to contemplate suicide. In her lawsuit, Lader blames the Brownsteins for migraines, anxiety and colitis. Before the court date, for which both retained lawyers, Lader dropped the suit. “The girls hugged and made up” said Brownstein’s father, according to the Centre Daily Times. They even plan on being roommates again this fall.

A Mifflin County Commissioner used her official Facebook page to speak out against Muslims. The Centre Daily Times reports that Lisa Nancollas changed the cover photo of the “Lisa Nancollas, Mifflin County Commissioner” page to a design of a red circle and diagonal line over a mosque, framed by the words “No Islam Allowed.” When constituents complained, Nancollas shot back, “If you don’t like what I post on my wall then don’t look at my wall. Also, I believe in the Christian God. I don’t believe in Islam, sharia law nor do I believe in Allah.” The three Mifflin County Commissioners have a range of powers — over elections, taxes, property use and social services — making the open prejudice of a commissioner concerning to many. After a drumming by other Facebook users, Nancollas deleted her page.

www.dayauto.com 14

A Pitt student took his date to the top of a building and, “[i]n an effort to impress her,” attempted to jump to the adjacent building, reports KDKA. This Romeo of Oakland ended up wedged between the two

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

buildings, a Bruegger’s Bagels and a Qdoba, for several hours. (Side note: Oakland has become so corporatized!) Firefighter and city public-works crews cut holes into the wall of the Qdoba to free him. At around 6 a.m., paramedics carried him away on a stretcher and treated his ankle injury — by which time his date had probably moved on to a more athletic suitor.

Many teens do something stupid with their friends once they get access to the family vehicle — even some from sects religiously prohibited from owning cars. According to the Courier Express of Dubois, police in Indiana County pulled over a horse and buggy after allegedly spotting two men riding on its roof. They cited the five occupants of the vehicle, all male Amish teenagers, with underage drinking, and charged 18-year-old Robert Miller, who was operating the buggy, with DUI.

An Ephrata man’s horny dog landed him in trouble with the law. The Ephrata Review, the community newspaper of the Lancaster County town, reports that police allegedly found that Matthew Bacon’s dog “had broken into [a] residence through a screen door to be with female dogs inside.” Police say it was the third time they’d caught the amorous pooch on the loose and cited Bacon with a doglaw violation.

Several people spotted a naked man chillaxing in the Susquehanna River near Perry County, police told PennLive. com. The man (and his genitals) were variously seen on the shore and floating in the water. He encountered a group of people and asked them for a towel. They did him one better and offered a pair of pants. The man wandered off and has not been seen since.

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STEELERS PREVIEW

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The Pittsburgh Steelers need success on both sides of the ball if they hope to win it all {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

ON G B E FO R E they ever got to training camp in Latrobe this year, the Pittsburgh Steelers had some big problems. First, in March, wide receiver Martavis Bryant, who was poised for a breakout year in 2016, was suspended for the season for violating the NFL’s substance-abuse policy. Then, in July, it was announced that the Steelers’ top running back, Le’Veon Bell, would be suspended four games for missing a drug test, his second career suspension dating to a marijuana arrest last season. While Bell’s suspension was subsequently reduced to three games, it’s still a distraction that the team will have to deal with. Moreover, the NFL is investigating linebacker James Harrison following an Al-Jazeera America report that alleged Harrison was involved with performanceenhancing drugs. Harrison’s name was brought up by the story’s main source. Harrison denies the allegation, and the source immediately recanted any statement regarding Harrison, yet the NFL is pushing forward. But if Mike Tomlin’s worried, he’s not showing it. “When you’re working with 53-plus men, things are going to come up,” he said at an Aug. 24 press conference. “How we handle it is important, not allowing it to become a distraction. And I’ve gotten pretty good at doing that.” The other thing Tomlin has gotten good at it is winning. Going into his 10th season, he’s just eight wins from 100 career victo-

{CP PHOTO BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

Wide receiver Sammie Coates moves up the field against the Philadelphia Eagles on Aug. 18.

ries and is 1-1 in Super Bowls. The past few seasons have been disappointing, though: losses in the wild-card round in 2014, and in the second round last year. Tomlin’s no stranger to adversity, and his teams have battled both devastating injuries and off-ﬁeld controversies. Through it all, the Steelers have always managed to compete, and 2016 won’t be any different. Last year, the Steelers were 10-6 and backed into the playoffs by holding a tiebreaker over the New

The Steelers certainly had rough going early in this preseason, losing to both Detroit and Philadelphia. Offensively, the team’s young receivers, including secondyear man Sammie Coates, had some issues holding on to the football. Beyond Antonio Brown, the Steelers will be turning to a number of young wide receivers including Coates and Eli Rogers. Markus Wheaton is still slated to be the No. 2 receiver behind Brown, but Coates and Rogers will have big roles to ﬁll and must continue to get better. “Preseason is a chance to get better every week, not just me, but the whole team,” Coates says. “We have our struggles

York Jets. Going into last season, quarterback Ben Roethlisberger and his offense were predicted to put up big scores every week in hopes of compensating for a defense ﬁlled with question marks. But Roethlisberger missed four games with injuries, and the Steelers’ highpotency offense was hitor-miss. In week two, for example, the Steelers hung 43 points on San Francisco, then in week three barely squeaked by St. Louis, 12-6.

“COME THE START OF THE SEASON, WE’LL BE READY.”

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GAME HISTORY Everyone loves the square-headed Funko vinyl figures like the ones featured on the cover of this week’s edition. I like them, too, as anyone who has seen the cabinet surrounding my desk can attest. I think they’re great conversation pieces, which is why we featured them on the cover, but as far as “action figures” go, these doe-eyed vinyl creations leave a lot to be desired. In fact, except for the John Madden video-game series, NFL-related toys haven’t been that exciting. However, there are a few NFL-based toys and games that have reached iconic status. Here are a three of my favorites.

Starting Lineup figures (pre-Todd McFarlane): Long before McFarlane (the comic-book artist famous for creating Spawn) started making super-detailed, high-falutin’ versions of these figures, children of the 1980s couldn’t get enough. They had some detail, but the hands were molded together, and under one foot was a big glob of green plastic to make them stand up. They only make stars now, but back then, I was the proud owner of both Bryan Hinkle and Thomas Everett.

Tecmo Bowl: There’s no denying that Madden football is awesome. But for those of us with a Nintendo back in the day, Tecmo Bowl was the greatest thing we’d ever seen. It was the first game to feature actual player rosters. Every weekend, a dozen guys would gather in my dorm room (I had the Nintendo) and see how many touchdowns we could score with Bo Jackson.

NFL Action Team Mate from Sears: It took me awhile to find anything about these figures because up until a few years ago, I just assumed Santa made them in his workshop. But they were sold by Sears and were nondescript except for the uniforms; you also got interchangeable numbers to make them your favorite player. These things were fully posable, with what seemed like 30 joints. So when your Jack Lambert figure tackled your Roger Staubach figure, you could contort his body like it got hit by a truck. BY CHARLIE DEITCH

{CP PHOTO BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

With Le’Veon Bell suspended, Fitzgerald Toussaint will get a chance to play out of the Steelers backfield.

now, but come the start of the season things. They just have to make sure we’ll be ready and it will be a completely they’re not too anxious. They’re out there trying to make every play, trying to be different story.” Rogers is another receiver who could the best on every single play. Right now, become the difference-maker the Steelers we’re doing some really good things, were hoping Bryant would be. By the third and I’m excited to see what they can do preseason game, he’d made more than a moving forward.” Rounding out the offensive effort will half-dozen catches, and Roethlisberger had been taking the young player under be a veteran offensive line anchored by Maurkice Pouncey, who returns from his wing, a gesture not lost on Rogers. a serious injury suffered in the “I’m really humbled by the 2015 preseason. And after week time he’s put in with me along three, the backfield will be MORE with [how early] he’s gotten PHOTOS anchored by 2014 Pro Bowler me involved,” said Rogers. ONLINE. Le’Veon Bell, with DeAngelo For his part, Roethlisberger w at ww per Williams and Fitzgerald Tousseems ready to roll. While he a p y it c pgh m saint holding down the fort didn’t play in either of the o .c until Bell’s suspension is lifted. first two preseason games, in The defensive side of the ball the third, against New Orleans, raises more questions than answers. he played two series, throwing for 148 yards and two touchdowns — one Solid veterans on this unit include lineto Brown and the other to tight end Jesse man Cam Heyward and linebacker LawJames, who seems poised to take over for rence Timmons. But for sustained sucHeath Miller, who retired at the end of last cess, the Steelers need big contributions season. Miller and Roethlisberger had a from young linebackers Ryan Shazier, close relationship, and while he’s not sure Jarvis Jones and Bud Dupree, as well as anyone can take Miller’s place, he’s seen defensive lineman Stephon Tuitt. All have shown flashes of greatness, but all need some good things from James. “They don’t need to try to be Heath to make the next step this year. Among Miller,” Roethlisberger said at training the defense’s biggest problems is making camp in July. “That’s not what we’re try- crucial stops on third down. “We’ve got a dynamic offense, and we ing to do. He’s doing some really good

need to get on and off the ﬁeld quickly to give them a chance to score touchdowns,” Tuitt said following the Steelers’ preseason loss to the Eagles. Tuitt said that will happen if the defensive backs keep receivers covered long enough to let the pass-rushers get to the quarterback. “If we do that,” he said, “if we can come together as one unit, we’ll be able to get off the ﬁeld quicker.” Heyward said the Steelers’ rough start to the preseason, and defensive mistakes like missed tackles, does have him a bit concerned about the start of the season. “We all have to get better, including myself,” Heyward said. “We have to stop giving up so many points, even in the preseason.” That task could be made harder if the recent struggles of the Steelers’ secondary continue. That’s another reason why the pass rush and quarterback pressure will be so vital to the team’s defensive success. But if the defense improves enough to give the offense time to do its job, anything is possible — even a ninth Super Bowl appearance. “If any of the 32 football teams don’t expect to win a Super Bowl, there’s something wrong with them,” Roethlisberger said. So, of course that’s our expectation, too. We should never shy away from that. C D E I T C H @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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{CP PHOTOS BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

Tight end Jesse James

DIFFERENCE-MAKERS Big seasons from these five players will likely mean success for the Steelers in 2016 {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

JESSE JAMES, NO. 81, TIGHT END

The retirement of Heath Miller left the Steelers with big shoes to ﬁll at tight end. The team signed free agent Ladarius Green, from San Diego, but the fact is, the tight end of the future was already on the roster. James, a second-year player out of Penn State, has the size (6’7”, 261 lbs.) and strength, as well as the hands, to become the answer at the position. As of this writing, Green has been injured and has yet to play a down. If James comes on like we think he will, Green might never get a chance.

MAURKICE POUNCEY, NO. 53, CENTER

The Steelers’ veteran center has had an injury-plagued career, but none was as frightening as the one from last year’s preseason. Pouncey missed the entire 2015 campaign after breaking his ﬁbula. He had seven surgeries and was wracked with a staph infection. But he’s back at full strength, and if Pouncey can stay healthy as the anchor of the

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

Wide receiver Eli Rogers

offensive line, the offense will be as potent as it wants to be.

ELI ROGERS, NO. 17, WIDE RECEIVER

There’s something about watching Rogers play that just makes you believe he’s going to be a big deal in this league. He’s not the biggest, strongest

or fastest receiver, but Rogers is tenacious and refuses to quit. He didn’t make the team out of training camp last year, but this year he has taken advantage of every one of his opportunities. Even quarterback Ben Roethlisberger sees the potential and has given him special attention. Antonio Brown is the man, we all know that, but with Markus Wheaton unable to take the next step and Martavis Bryant’s annual suspension, don’t be surprised to see big things from Rogers.

WILLIAM GAY, NO. 22, CORNERBACK

Much like Ike Taylor before him, Gay gets little to no respect for a position that he plays very well. Mainly because, much like Taylor, he’s not a guy who snags a ton of interceptions. But what he does, like Taylor, is cover the opposition’s No. 1 receiver like a diaper on a newborn — so tight that nothing sneaks out. This is the year Gay starts getting noticed as one of the top backs in the game, and we predict he’ll bring some respectability back to the team’s secondary.

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RYAN SHAZIER, NO. 50, LINEBACKER

Look for the third-year man out of Ohio State to have a big season. He’s the prototype of the new Steelers linebacker: strong and fast. There’s a chance that the entire linebacking corps for the Steelers will be huge this year, but Shazier will be the one who dominates. His 87 tackles and 3.5 sacks from 2015 will be eclipsed by season’s end.

IT WILL TAKE YOU JUST ONE

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“I’m excited moving forw about starting the p ard and for Carolina as reparation to work this we continue th is called preseing that ason.”

“He’s in great shape. He’s sharpening his sword for the battle just like everyone else.”

Some of the best preseason quotes from one of the NFL’s most quotable coaches THIS SEASON MARKS Mike Tomlin’s 10th as head coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers. In that time, he’s become known as much for his press conferences as for his coaching acuity. To be sure, Tomlin has a unique way of addressing the media. Here are some of our favorites from the preseason.

“I know that there are a couple of hot-button topics, and I wanted to address those appropriately. … I’ll start first with Le’Veon Bell. ... He’s in the appeal process, so me adding anything to it is not going to help the matter in any way whatsoever.”

C OM P I L E D B Y C H A RL I E D E I T C H

it “Just looking ateye d ke na e th with u may not give yon io at rm the info .” that you desire {CP PHOTO BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

he “I think t eds e n defense eking e to stop s t and r fo m co just play.”

“I never try to tell a story on one performance, particularly the first one.”

MIKE’S ON

“When you’re looking at the line, and you’re a competitor, if that doesn’t get your juices flowing, then something’s wrong.”

e few ne of th hat really o ’s e H “ nt pared I’ve see rookies e he’s come preg in looks likm a condition a knock t o fro n t’s int. Tha ’s really standpot the others. It him.” agains of the cap to a tip

“He’s becoming what we expected him to become.”

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Get Close to the Red Zone on the Red Line. [or the Blue Line]

Getting to a Steelers game just got a whole lot easier. Tired of fighting traffic and searching for a parking space? Here’s an option, take the T to Allegheny station. It’s just a first down from Heinz Field and a whole world of hurt away from the old way. The Red and Blue lines can get you there, and the Park and Ride lots are wide open. Take the T and see. For more information go to PortAuthority.org.

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It looks like the upcoming Steelers season has the potential to be a really fun and successful one. Every major family holiday can be spent watching a Steelers game this year. There are contests on Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Day, plus the bye week is Halloween. The schedule, the opponents and even the travel favor the Black and Gold. The Steelers play the NFC East, which produced only one winning team last season. Besides Cincinnati, only four other teams on the schedule won more games than they lost in 2015. For traveling fans, every away game is in the Eastern Time Zone. Last season, “The Cheap Seats” predicted an 11-5 Steelers season, missing by just one game. So listen up, degenerate gamblers, here’s how the season will go.

WEEK 1: AT WASHINGTON Get ready to hear the phrase, “Antonio Brown makes an incredible catch for a touchdown” a lot this season (probably in 10 or 11 games). In this one, he hauls in two as the Steelers roll 27-17. After the loss, Washington owner and all-around-jagoff Dan Snyder announces he’s firing the head coach. Jay Gruden is let go, and Snyder hires his ninth coach in 18 years.

WEEK 2: CINCINNATI

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The Bengals jump out to a quick 20-0 lead and promptly begin to over-celebrate. The Steelers come back and humiliate them in a 37-20 shellacking of the defending AFC North champs. The Bengals show some discipline in this game, however, and are flagged for a mere three questionable late hits and one ejection.

WEEK 3: AT PHILADELPHIA Maybe it was overconfidence from the last game, but the Steelers drop their first game of the year,16-13. For some reason, the Steelers haven’t won in Philly since the Steelers had Steelerettes. Fitzgerald Touissaint, who caused a running-back controversy by over-achieving during Le’Veon Bell’s suspension, fumbles late, ensuring that Bell’s job is safe.

WEEK 4: KANSAS CITY Bell is back in full swing and extremely relaxed as he runs all over the Chiefs defense for a 26-10 win. The Steelers are now 3-1 after a standout game by the beleaguered secondary. Some

older fans report being uncomfortable saying the last names of cornerbacks William Gay and Ross Cockrell, but they should stop being so close-minded.

WEEK 5: NEW YORK JETS Jets fans have finally accepted the fact that they are losers. Only Beaver Falls’ own “Broadway Joe” Willie Namath could make a winner out of this organization, and it hasn’t happened since he left. Even though they were 10-6 last year, the Jets are heading back to loser town after a 24-9 loss to the Steelers. The Steelers are now 4-1 as they head into South Beach.

WEEK 6: AT MIAMI The Dolphins’ last appearance in a Super Bowl was when they played the Eagles in Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, and even that was 25 years ago. In real life, it’s been more than 40 years since Miami has won it all, and those guys are obnoxious about it. OK, 1972 Dolphins, we get it — you had a perfect year. The remnants of that team celebrate annually when the last undefeated team loses. The Steelers faithful cram into the Dolphins’ stadium and enjoy a three-touchdown performance by Antonio Brown. Steelers 38, Dolphins 14.

WEEK 7: NEW ENGLAND The Big Showdown starts with a celebrity sighting: Patriots coach Bill Belichick is seen shopping at Gabriel Brothers in West Mifflin. The Patriots spend the week spying on the Steelers’ practice and deflating their balls, and win 13-10 after three calls that all suspiciously go Tom Brady’s way. The Steelers are 5-2.

WEEK 8: AT BALTIMORE The Steelers put sightseeing plans in Baltimore on hold as they focus on their biggest rival. It’s close again as the Steelers leave “Charm City” with a 13-10 overtime victory. After the game, a drunken brawl outside the stadium results in the Ray Lewis statue getting accidentally shot at. The Steelers are now 6-2, as Maurkice Pouncey has avoided injury all season.

WEEK 9: DALLAS Plastic-faced Chris Christie’s hug buddy, Jerry Jones, brings his sad-sack excuse for a team into Pittsburgh. No hugs today as the Steelers are 44-21 victors. De Angelo Williams, Markus

Wheaton and Ladarius Green all score, and even Landry Jones plays OK in some mop-up work.

WEEK 10: AT CLEVELAND Clevelanders are still dealing with the completely foreign sense of pride since the Cavaliers ended the city’s championship drought. Unfortunately for them, LeBron doesn’t play for the Browns, and they once again realize they still have nothing to be proud of. Cleveland becomes mathematically eliminated from the postseason. The Steelers, a 32-13 winner, move to 8-2.

WEEK 11: AT INDIANAPOLIS This is a Thanksgiving nightmare as nothing goes right and Indianapolis prevails 27-10. Andrew Luck beats the secondary all day, as Steelers fans collectively worry about the team’s defense. The 8-3 Steelers head back to Pittsburgh.

WEEK 12: NEW YORK GIANTS Willie Gay gets another pick-6 to add to his underappreciated collection. The Steelers win 21-18 and move to 9-3 on the year. Despite that, Steve, from Butler, and Jeff, from Sharpsburg, both call into a local radio station to say that the Steelers should fire Mike Tomlin.

WEEK 13: AT BUFFALO A 150-yard game by Shady McCoy isn’t enough for the Bills, as a 19-12 Steelers win dampens any hope Buffalo has of making the playoffs; 1999 was the last year Buffalo had a postseason game. With the Bills out again, Buffalo begins looking forward to, well, nothing.

WEEK 14: AT CINCINNATI Prior to the game, the Bengals honor their 2006 team. That team had the distinction of having more player arrests than victories in a single season. Lifetime Achievement winner Adam “Pac Man” Jones emcees the reunion ceremony. Bengals fans openly sob as the Steelers stick it to them again with a 20-19 last-minutefield-goal victory. The Steelers clinch the AFC North, ending the Bengals’ long one-year reign as champion.

WEEK 15: BALTIMORE The starters rest for this one as Baltimore wins it 22-20. Landry Jones throws three picks as an emergency starter. Ben Roethlisberger is being rested and Bruce Gradkowski injures himself during pre-game warm-ups.

WEEK 16: CLEVELAND The Steelers finish 12-4 with their annual win over Cleveland at home, 30-16. Cleveland gets the second pick in next year’s draft and promises to do something stupid with it as usual. The Steelers get the second seed and enjoy a week off before the playoffs.

POSTSEASON: The magic ends in the first game. They can’t all be happy endings as the Steelers are upended 16-14 by the defending Super Bowl Champion Broncos. The stifling and experienced Denver defense proves too much. The Steelers clinched early and played no meaningful games down the stretch, and it hurt them. Steve and Jeff call into the local radio shows to drop the “I told you so.” INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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STEELERS FANS with an eye toward football history will savor digging through Michael MacCambridge’s new biography, Chuck Noll: His Life’s Work. A relentless reporter and able writer, MacCambridge excavates the origin story of the man behind the Steel Curtain better than anyone to date. In Cleveland — where Noll grew up and played — the book is also a must-read. At least the ﬁrst half. The rest might be too painful for Turnpike Rivalry faithful. Noll gets the kind of biographer he deserves. MacCambridge’s 608page America’s Game: The Epic Story of How Football Captured a Nation (2004) was a Washington Post distinguished nonﬁction selection. And the narrative is straightforward, matching the Hall of Fame coach’s persona. Wisely, MacCambridge starts by painting the portrait of Noll’s humble roots in Depression-era East Cleveland because there’s no need to scramble the timeline. We’ve seen the clips of the Immaculate Reception 100 times and have heard tales of the four Super Bowl titles since grade school.

CHUCK NOLL: HIS LIFE’S WORK By Michael MacCambridge University of Pittsburgh Press, 432 pp., $27.95

What MacCambridge does best is document not just the relationships that shaped Noll’s character — a father who struggled with crippling Parkinson’s disease while still a young man and a stoic mother, for example — but the compelling mix of ethnic Catholic and AfricanAmerican families in his working-class boyhood neighborhood. (With the Steelers, Noll would regularly give athletes from small black colleges an opportunity, and was one of the ﬁrst NFL coaches to start a black quarterback.) MacCambridge even chronicles Noll’s German-immigrant grandparents and connects the dots to Noll’s social, educational and sporting life built around Holy Trinity church in the ’40s. It’s particulars that make any story interesting, and that’s the case in Mac-

Cambridge’s authoritative recounting, which includes archived material and interviews with both Noll’s closest childhood pal and his older sister, Rita. Still, even as MacCambridge reconstructs Noll’s life story and his playing and coaching arc — absorbing wisdom from legends Paul Brown, Sid Gillman and Don Shula — he never quite puts ﬂesh on the man. For all the biographical information — the lifelong Catholic faith, the interest in nature photography, ﬂying, sailing, wine — we don’t fully understand why Noll pursued those hobbies. Of course, he also kept his players — and seemingly everyone other than his wife, Marianne — at arm’s length. It’s ironic, and perhaps telling, that Noll was eventually faulted for keeping some veteran players for too long. Inevitably, the book drifts toward hagiography. There’s no real examination of what Noll knew about his players’ widespread steroid use — other than the matter-of-fact acknowledgement that Noll hired a strength coach with a known steroid history. Also, Noll, who died in 2014, developed Alzheimer’s, and whether his dementia was football-related receives only brief discussion. Considering former center Mike Webster’s post-playing-career tragedy, it’s an issue — or should be — of profound interest to Steelers fans. Ultimately, we do come to understand why Noll and his wife kept his dementia diagnosis under wraps, like they did so much of their lives. Given the embarrassment, even shame, of his father’s debilitating illness and his own epilepsy all those years ago, it’s easy to imagine the muted Noll funneling that repressed emotion into football. Yet you cannot help feeling for his players — young men fresh out of college who looked up to him — who tried to get to know him better as a human being. But that never happened, even after their playing careers were over. You also can’t help wondering whether, deep down, the Emperor, as Myron Cope nicknamed Noll, might not have been more enriched had he been able to reveal a little more of himself to those also wearing black and gold. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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{CP FILE PHOTO BY AARON WARNICK}

Le’Veon Bell

HAZY REGULATIONS {BY ALEX GORDON} AS THE 2016 NFL season gets underway,

marijuana use by players has become one of the most contentious issues, particularly in Pittsburgh with the suspensions of Le’Veon Bell and Martavis Bryant. However, the questions surrounding the topic are nothing new. The ﬁrst NFL player suspensions for marijuana use took place during the 1988 season. There were admissions of pot use and other drug-related suspensions prior, but the early-’80s substance suspensions were for performance enhancing drugs (PEDs) and cocaine. Weed came later. Among the ﬁrst was Greg Townsend, defensive end for the then-Los Angeles Raiders, who was caught with “a small amount of marijuana” and received a fourgame suspension. “Just like people go in their refrigerator and grab a beer, mix a cocktail, I went and rolled a joint after practice,” Townsend told the Los Angeles Times in 1988. “That’s what I did to unwind.” That’s about as candid a response as we’ve heard from an NFL player on the subject, and that was 28 years ago. Both the drug and the game have undergone considerable cultural shifts since, though in opposite directions. Marijuana is now fully legal in four states and Washington, D.C.; it’s legal medicinally in 36 others, including Pennsylvania, and the movement doesn’t seem to be slowing down. The NFL, on the other hand, has endured some less-than-stellar attention in the past decade regarding its responses to issues of domestic violence, concussions and PEDs. According to the online sports-statistics hub Spotrac, there are 35 players facing

suspensions or fines for the 2016 season; 15 of these cases involve substance abuse and eight for PEDs. The rest involve onfield behavior like roughing passers and deflating footballs. Ricky Williams, the retired New Orleans running back known for his prolific on-field performance and prolific offfield smoking, discussed marijuana in the NFL on HBO’s Any Given Wednesday last week. When asked by host Bill Simmons if he’d be a Hall-of-Famer if weed had been legal during his career, Williams responded unequivocally: “For sure, no doubt about it,” adding “the negative media coverage I got really tarnished my image.” Selling the image of football players as wholesome, hard-working role models seems to be the NFL’s priority. Compare Townsend’s response with the average “sorry-I-got-high” press conference for today’s players, and it’s hard to ignore that the NFL is at least slightly at odds with the direction of the country at whole. While the league insists that its policy is meant to reflect marijuana’s status as a controlled substance, it sure feels like a branding issue. Patrick Nightingale, executive director of Pittsburgh NORML (National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws), believes an ideal marijuana policy in the NFL would allow players to make their own decisions about pot as long as they comply with their state’s cannabis laws. However, he does acknowledge that the employee/employer contracts enable the league to reprimand behavior as it sees fit. Still, he believes changes to the NFL policy are possible. “They’re going to have to confront it,” says Nightingale. A L E X G ORD ON @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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“I DON’T WANT THERE TO BE ANY SORT OF BARRIER, DIVISION OR SEPARATION.”

BEAT

{BY IAN THOMAS}

RAISE A TOAST Donald Ducote’s enthusiasm is infectious. As a co-owner of Spirit, in Lawrenceville, and the new general manager of Pittsburgh-based Wild Kindness Records, Ducote sees great things for the future of Pittsburgh’s music scene, and he wants to have a part in shaping it. Ducote and Spirit partner Tom Barr moved to Pittsburgh from Brooklyn two years ago to open the bar and venue. In Pittsburgh, they found a population that was ready and willing to invest in its local scene. “It was really hard to get people to go out to shows in Brooklyn,” he says. “People come out to shows here. I think people want to support their bands. If they’ve got nothing going on, they’ll come out and see their friends’ show.” Yet for all the venues, outlets and opportunities that Pittsburgh has to offer its up-and-coming musicians, Ducote still sees musicians struggling to fund their art. He eir art aims to offer some assistance with his first major initiative as Wild Kindness GM. In partnership with Penn Brewery, Wild Kindness has introduced Toasted Sessions Lager, a microbrew currently sold exclusively at Spirit, with limited distribution in other venues in the works. A portion of sales of the beer — $100 per keg or roughly 20 percent of gross sales — will be donated by Penn Brewery to mitigate the recording expenses of Wild Kindness artists. The first bands to benefit will be Slugss, It It, and Honey; each is currently in some stage of recording. Ducote sees potential in the model. “It’s the best way that we can think of for musicians that are actually putting out music they believe in without having to spend their own money to do it,” he says. In crafting the brew, the collaborators sought to make something referential to its intended beneficiaries. “When we all sat down around a table in the basement of the brewery, everyone knew that we wanted it to be easy drinking and moderate in alcohol, a.k.a. ‘sessionable,’ for the obvious fact that we want people to drink as many as possible, so to raise as much money as we can for the bands,” Barr explains via email. “We thought sessions having a double entendre by referencing recording sessions and a sessionable beer was pretty clever.” INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

For more information, visit www.wildkindness.com.

Singing Sad Songs: Jeremiah Clark

FULLY UNDERSTOOD {BY MIKE SHANLEY}

EREMIAH CLARK didn’t plan on being

a political singer-songwriter. Armed with an acoustic guitar and a passionate tenor voice that ﬁlls a room with just a few notes, he’s able to reach listeners through his introspective songs. But his songs began looking outward in 2008 when California passed Proposition 8, a ballot initiative and state constitutional amendment that eliminated the rights of same-sex couples to marry. “When that happened I thought, I’ve been given this opportunity to say something that can actually make a difference,” he says. “It’s not just a post on Facebook or Instagram. This song can actually make a difference.” With its strong blend of melody and lyrical punch, “Understood?” proudly declares: “I don’t need to be understood / and I don’t care if you think I should / because

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

I can’t be contained in this box / you’ve placed around me: the walls that are surrounding.” Live, it typically generates a singalong, when the ﬁnal chorus changes “I” to “we,” and the impact is nothing short of moving.

JEREMIAH CLARK WITH BRAD YODER

8 p.m. Thu., Sept. 1. Club Café. 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $15. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com

Clark, who spends a great deal of time on the road, plays “Understood?” almost every night. But the most memorable performance likely came in his hometown, outside of Memphis. “I played that song in the backyard of the house that I grew

up in, and my mother — who was raised Southern Baptist — was standing in the back of a huge crowd, smoking a cigarette, with her arms in the air,” Clark recalls. “At the end of this song, she starts saying, ‘That’s my boy! That’s my boy, y’all!’ Who knew that I’d sing a song about gay rights and my Southern Baptist mother would be in the background cheering me on? Wow. Things are good.” Speaking on the phone from the Northwest, Clark made Pittsburgh his homebase in the mid-’00s. He eventually headed to Portland, before settling in Palm Springs earlier this year. The California desert town, known as a place that was once the home of Frank Sinatra and Bob Hope, might not seem like the ideal locale for a singer-songwriter, but Clark says otherwise. “It’s small, around 50,000

people, which is smaller than my hometown. There’s a really interesting appreciation for art and culture in a town that is so small. You’d never expect that,” he says. “Because it’s so close to L.A., and so many people who live there, either part time or full time, are part of the entertainment industry in some way, there’s great theaters, there’s great live shows. At the same time, the level and the quality [people are] expecting is higher than what you’d find in any city that size.” At this point, Clark has logged more than 500 performances across the country, everywhere from bars to listening rooms to house parties. The experience shows in his onstage rapport. Like the best acts one might find in Palm Springs, he tells stories between songs with skilled timing, keeping an audience engaged. (Many of those stories include recreations of phone calls back home to his mother.) “I don’t get nervous until I walk off the stage,” he says. “I don’t know what to do after the show. I’m a mess afterward. When I’m on stage, it feels like these people are all my friends and I want to talk to them and communicate with them.” But unlike a stage performer who adopts a persona, Clark wants the audience to relate to him, rather than seeing him simply as an entertainer. “I want people to realize that I’m a real person. I’m fucked up like other people are fucked up. I have real issues,” he says. “I don’t want there to be any sort of barrier, division or separation between me and them. I want them to feel like the songs that I sing are words that they could’ve written. I feel like, the more I perform, the more I strive for that.” His recent, self-titled CD includes a number of tracks that were originally recorded when he lived in Pittsburgh and released as Just Another Sad Song. The new package remasters the early tracks and adds two new ones, the rowdy “Ten Feet Tall on Tequila” and “United States Dividing,” the latter another foray into politics that shows “Understood?” wasn’t a lucky fluke. During his phone conversation, Clark admits he won’t see Palm Springs again for nearly two months, due to constant traveling. After a decade of performances, he sees no plans to chuck the music life for something like graduate school or a desk job anytime soon. “Honestly, it’s more exciting than it’s ever been, and I hope I can keep saying that,” he says. “I want to keep at this because I know what I have to say, and the music that I have to play is important. I know it’s not just something I could ever do as a hobby anymore. There’s no going back.” INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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{PHOTOS COURTESY OF JARED MURPHY}

Left to right: Ricky Petticord, Doug Harshberger, Brady Lanzendorfer, David Varlotto

CLOSE UP AND FAR OUT {BY MEG FAIR} YRS IS A BAND that weaves dreamy, fuzzdrenched pop instrumentation with carefully connected, thoughtful lyrical themes. The Pittsburgh-based group’s debut fulllength Through Time & Space I Will (Have No)(Hold Your) Place is a tumultuous journey about the self-doubt that accompanies

relationship struggles. The lyrics tell of the troubles, occurring in a dream-like outerspace setting. “The space metaphor was a literal metaphor for isolation. I felt distant and far away from what was happening and everything in my life at the time,” says Brady Lanzendorfer, the primary songwriter behind YRS. As the relationship at the center of the album collapses, it feels as enormous as planets falling out of orbit. Even at the record’s brattiest moments, the gloom and

heartbreak is audible. All 14 tracks on the LP are intensely personal and consciously crafted, and to deny that the narrative material of Through Time & Space could make for a devastating indie film would be a sin. There are moments of campiness and raw transitions, but these suit the honesty and confessional nature of the effort. These days, Lanzendorfer laughs about the album’s subject. “It’s just a glorified break-up album,” he jokes over the phone. “I wear my emotions on my sleeve,” he says. “I had a rule where I wouldn’t write any lyric I wouldn’t say out loud.” That’s where YRS shines, in the balance between lyrics like, “Kickflip, bong rip, swap spit, I’m over it,” and “So this is me turning off my phone / And this will probably be my last drive home / And this is me realizing why I’m alone.” “It was how I was balancing it in real life. Bad things were happening, but I was trying to have a sense of humor about it,” says Lanzendorfer. The first time I heard “Daphne & the Gravemouth,” the fourth track on the record, was more than three years ago, in the parking lot of a Greensburg café during a tiny arts festival. Lanzendorfer was performing solo, and each lyric came through crystal clear. It yanked at something in me that I can’t place, but I felt moved to tears. The riffs oozed pop, but the words expressed a deep, dark sadness, like the disconcerting, quiet infinity of space. After years of performing the album’s songs solo, Lanzendorfer is now accompanied by drummer David Varlotto, guitarist Ricky Petticord and recently rejoined bassist Doug Harshberger. Lanzendorfer plays guitar and QChord (a kind of digital guitar/ keyboard hybrid) and sings.

YRS

WITH HUM 8 p.m. Fri., Sept. 9. Spirit, 242 51st St., Lawrenceville. $20. 412-586-4441 or www.druskyentertainment.com

Lanzendorfer initially intended to make the cassette tapes himself, but as the release of their mostly self-recorded album approached, Varlotto suggested that Lanzendorfer send the album to Josh Clark of Head2Wall Records, a small but wellregarded label based out of Columbus, Ohio. Although the turnaround would have to be almost unreasonably quick — it was March and the release was planned for May — Clark was more than happy to accommodate. “I’m eternally grateful,” Lanzendorfer says, “because he was more than hospitable to us and made us feel like he cared about it as much as we did.” INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

NEW GRASS {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Whiskey Shivers

If you go see Austin-based bluegrass quintet Whiskey Shivers, don’t expect to see a traditional interpretation of the genre in the spirit of Flatt and Scruggs. This is more like the freaky banjo-playing kid from Deliverance hopped up on meth, Mountain Dew and broken dreams. The music is frenetic, but because it features fiddles, banjos, an acoustic guitar and the occasional washboard instead of electric guitars, the end result is bluegrass with a rocket up its ass. The band has been around since 2009, and out of deference to traditional bluegrass music, it calls its iteration “trash grass.” “We try to avoid calling ourselves bluegrass, because there are a lot of people that hold on to the traditional sound closely and would hate to hear the sound that we’re making be referred to as bluegrass,” front man and fiddler Bobby Fitzgerald told online entertainment magazine Smile Politely earlier this year. “We play a lot of traditional music and traditional songs, but speed them up a little bit. Maybe make them a little more crunchy.” The best way to prepare for seeing this group live is to watch the video for the song “Gimme All Your Lovin’,” off Whiskey Shivers’ 2014 selftitled record. Fitzgerald’s voice is raw but melodic, as he rips through the lyrics while playing the fiddle. It’s the type of song you’ll find throughout the record. But the real “personality” comes out in the visual: The band has morphed into one giant creature, stacked up under a red plaid shirt, with its various limbs each playing a different instrument; occasionally, a face peeks out from behind a button to sing backup. The end of the video scrolls down the beast and reveals something shocking under the floorboards. The imagery is out there, to say the least, but so is this band. And that’s a really good thing. CDEITCH@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

WHISKEY SHIVERS with JAYKE ORVIS, THE LO-FI PROJECT 8 p.m. Wed., Sept. 7. Club Café, 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $8. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com

{PHOTO COURTESY OF PAUL KOUDOUNARIS}

CRITICS’ PICKS

Mac Sabbath [WHAT THE] + THU., SEPT. 01

{PHOTO COURTESY OF TELL ALL YOUR FRIENDS PR}

If you’ve ever thought to yourself, “Man, I’d love to see a heavy-metal parody band critique the fast-food industry in the style of Black Sabbath,” then wow, does the Rex Theater have a gig for you. Mac Sabbath is just that, a costumed act dressed like spooky versions of fast-food legends like Ronald McDonald and Grimace. With tongue-in-cheek tracks like “Frying Pan,” “Pair-a-Buns” and “Never Say Diet,” this band found the nichiest niche and did the damn thing. Joining the bill is Clownvis Presley, Only Flesh and Super Fun Time Awesome Party Band. Meg Fair 7 p.m. 1602 E. Carson St., South Side. $17-20. All ages. 412-381-6811 or www.rextheater.com

[INDIE ROCK] + THU., SEPT. 01 Same is celebrating the release of its debut EP Weird as Hell at The Shop. The spacey rock record is five songs of crunch and grit with a heavy ’90s influence. Weird as Hell emulates the catchy riffage of acts like The Sidekicks, while expressing the pop spirit of That Dog. Saccharine at moments and sour at others, Same seems to be carefully carving a place for itself in the local music scene. No party is complete without friends: Joining the bill are Lithe Lungs, YRS and Mere Phantoms. All local everything. MF 8:30 p.m. 4214 Main St., Bloomfield. $5-10. All ages. Search “Weird as Hell release show” on Facebook.

[INDIE FOLK] + SAT., SEPT. 03 Tonight, The Mountain Goats show off the band’s influential folk prowess at Mr. Smalls Theatre. Frontman and songwriter John Darnielle has written more than 15 albums worth of carefully crafted vignettes, earning him a cult following and plenty of adoration.

NEWS

This special mini-tour features a new band member, Matt Douglas, on sax and keys. Opening up the night is Tristen, a poppy, folky artist with harmonies for days and a natural inclination for crossover appeal. MF 8 p.m. 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $25. All ages. 412-821-4447 or www.mrsmalls.com

[FOLK ROCK] + SAT., SEPT. 03 Thanks to its golden sounds, Los Angeles fourpiece Valley Queen has drawn comparisons to Fleetwood Mac (high praise, but who ISN’T compared to Fleetwood Mac these days?). The Valley band — appearing Queen tonight at Club Café with locals the SemiSupervillains — draws from freewheeling West Coast folk-rock influences. But stirring, memorable melodies and singer Natalie Carol’s soaring warble elevates Valley Queen to something beyond retro facsimile. Margaret Welsh 7 p.m. 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $8. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com

[MISC.] + SUN., SEPT. 04 It’s time again for the Allegheny County Music Festival. Roll up to the Hartwood Acres Amphitheater for an evening of family-friendly tunes: Nevada Color brings its energetic indie pop to the park, and Jim Donovan & Sun King Warriors offer a unique blend of pop, world music and classic-rock styles. Ferdinand the Bull will present its bluegrass-ish crooning and banjo artistry, and headlining the 17th annual event is Rusted Root, the world-musicmeets-rock-meets-acoustic band that, for Pittsburghers, really needs no introduction. MF 5 p.m. 200 Hartwood Acres, South Park. $20 suggested donation per vehicle. All ages. 412-350-4636 or www.alleghenycounty.us

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LIVE MUSIC TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X165 (PHONE) {ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION} REX THEATER. PigPen Theater Co. South Side. 412-381-6811. SMILING MOOSE. Arcane Haven Support: Seven Remedies, With All My Strength Gallo Locknez, Lazy Blackman, West the Composer. South Side. 412-431-4668.

ROCK/POP SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER

JOE GRUSHECKY & THE HOUSEROCKERS BRUCE WARM-UP PARTY 9:00PM • $1o Adv / $15 Dos • AGES 21+

FRIDAY SEPT. 16 METALACHI with special guests

9:30PM • $1o Adv / $12 Dos • AGES 21+

FRIDAY SEPT. 23 RORY SCOVEL

with special guest

9:30PM • $15 - $25 • AGES 21+

THU 01

GOOSKI’S. Old Table, Radon Chong, Sweet Baby Jesus, Pariah Dog. Polish Hill. 412-681-1658. HOWLERS. Advance Base, Hello Shark, Middle Children, Serpentine. Bloomfield. ATRIA’S RESTAURANT & 412-682-0320. TAVERN. Lenny & JAMES STREET Larry. 724-733-4453. GASTROPUB & TIKI BAR. The Dave SPEAKEASY. Iglar Band. Washington. w. w w TrailHeads, Shaq er 724-348-7022. hcitypap g p Nicholson & Ben .com Barson w/ Gizelxantha. North Side. 412-904-3335. HOWLERS. Tom Carter, PARADISE ISLAND. Sagas, Pairdown. Bloomfield. Right TurnClyde. Neville Island. 412-682-0320. 412-264-6570. SMILING MOOSE. Spencer Sutherland, Savannah Outen, Justin Stone. South Side. ARSENAL CIDER HOUSE & 412-431-4668. WINE CELLAR. Red Western. Lawrenceville. 412-260-6968. BAYARDSTOWN SOCIAL MR. SMALLS THEATER. Butch CLUB. Turpentiners. Strip District. Walker, Stay Gold w/ The Wind www.bayardstown.com. CLUB CAFE. Adelaide In Autumn, Cape Cod, Nice Cars. early. Metacara w/ Leek Lone. late. South Side. 412-431-4950. DIESEL. Failure Anthem. South Side. 412-431-8800. GOOD TIME BAR. 13 Saints & The Dirty Charms. Millvale. 412-821-9968. HOWLERS. Telavision, Boys, KMFD. Benefit for Phil Elvrum. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. IRMA FREEMAN CENTER FOR IMAGINATION. Melissa Knauer Trio, Slim Forsythe Big Band & The Knauer Brothers. Garfield. 412-924-0634.

SUN 04

FULL LIST ONLINE

MON 05

FRI 02

TUE 06

& the Wave, Suzanne Santo. Millvale. 412-821-4447. SMILING MOOSE. The Dread Crew of Oddwood, Dethlehem. South Side. 412-431-4668.

WED 07 CLUB CAFE. Whiskey Shivers w/ Jayke Orvis, The Lo-Fi Project. South Side. 412-431-4950. KEYSTONE BAR. The Bo’Hog Brothers. New Castle. 724-758-4217. SMILING MOOSE. Retox, He Whose Ox Is Gored, Silent, Netherlands. South Side. 412-431-4668.

DJS THU 01 MR. SMALLS THEATER. Centrifuge Thursdays. At the Funhouse. Millvale. 603-321-0277. PERLE CHAMPAGNE BAR. Bobby D Bachata. Downtown. 412-471-2058.

MP 3 MONDAY

Catch all the Hard Hits at the Hard Rock with our 360 viewing area and concert sound while enjoying drink specials.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

SAME

SAT 03 CLUB CAFE. Valley Queen w/ The Semi-Supervillians. early. Death Victorious, Show Pony. late. South Side. 412-431-4950. DOUBLE WIDE GRILL. Jay Wiley. Mars. 724-553-5212. DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Game Face. Robinson. 412-489-5631. KOPPER KETTLE. King’s Ransom. Washington. 724-225-5221. MEADOWS CASINO. Kool & The Gang. Washington. 724-503-1200. MR. SMALLS THEATER. The Mountain Goats. Millvale. 412-821-4447. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Neon Swing X-Perience. Downtown. 412-471-9100. OAKS THEATER. Desperado. Eagles Tribute. Oakmont. 412-828-6311. THE R BAR. The Dave Iglar Band. Dormont. 412-942-0882.

Each week we bring you a new song from a local artist. This week’s song comes from Same, an indierock four-piece that will release its debut record Weird As Hell, at The Shop in Bloomfield on Sept. 1. Stream or download the wistfully catchy track “Blurry Legs” for free at FFW, the music blog at www.pghcitypaper.com.

EARLY WARNINGS

THE R BAR. WILL E. TRI. Dormont. 412-942-0882. SOUTHSIDE WORKS. Jimmy Adler. South Side.

WED 07

THU 01 JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Roger Humphries Jam Session. Ballroom. North Side. 412-904-3335. VALLOZZI’S PITTSBURGH. Eric Johnson. Downtown. 412-394-3400.

FRI 02 ANDORA RESTAURANT - FOX CHAPEL. Pianist Harry Cardillo & vocalist Charlie Sanders. Fox Chapel. 412-967-1900. CAFE AU VINEYARD. Clem Rolin & Friends. Bridgeville. 412-921-4174. GRILLE ON SEVENTH. Tony Campbell & Howie Alexander. Downtown. 412-391-1004. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. RML Jazz. North Side. 412-904-3335. LA CASA NARCISI. Erin Burkett & Virgil Walters w/ Eric Susoeff & Max Leake. Gibsonia. 724-444-4744. PITTSBURGH WINERY. Organ-IZation. Strip District. 412-566-1000.

{FRI., SEPT. 09}

Agent Orange Cattivo, 146 44th St., Lawrenceville {SUN., OCT. 09}

Joan of Arc Brillobox, 4104 Penn Ave., Bloomfield {WED., NOV. 02}

Danny Brown

SAT 03

Mr. Smalls Theatre, 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale

FRI 02

TUE 06

ANDYS WINE BAR. DJ Malls Spins Vinyl. Downtown. 412-773-8884. BRILLOBOX. Pandemic : Global Dancehall, Cumbia, Bhangra, Balkan Bass. Bloomfield. 412-621-4900. THE FLATS ON CARSON. Pete Butta. South Side. 412-586-7644. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Beauty Slap, 28 North, Working Breed & Scott and Rosanna. Ballroom grand re-opening. North Side. 412-904-3335. ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. Downtown. 412-874-4582. THE R BAR. KAR-E-O-KEE. Dormont. 412-942-0882. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. South Side. 412-381-1330. SPIRIT HALL & LODGE. TITLE TOWN Soul & Funk Party. Rare Soul, Funk & wild R&B 45s feat. DJ Gordy G. & J.Malls. Lawrenceville. 412-621-4900.

THE GOLDMARK. Pete Butta. Reggae & dancehall. Lawrenceville. 412-688-8820.

SAT 03 CATTIVO. Illusions. w/ Funerals & Arvin Clay. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. DIESEL. DJ CK. South Side. 412-431-8800. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. SMILING MOOSE. DJ Goodnight Presents. South Side. 412-431-4668.

SUN 04 THE FLATS ON CARSON. Pete Butta. South Side. 412-586-7644.

NEWS

WED 07 SMILING MOOSE. Rock Star Karaoke w/ T-MONEY. South Side. 412-431-4668. SPOON. Spoon Fed. East Liberty. 412-362-6001.

HIP HOP/R&B FRI 02 1LIVE STUDIO. DJ Goodnight: Open Elements. Avalon. 412-424-9254.

BISTRO 9101. Aaron Lewinter. McCandless. 412-318-4871. CIOPPINO SEAFOOD CHOPHOUSE BAR. Jerry & Louis Lucarelli, Sunny Sunseri, Rich Scampone, Peg Wilson. Strip District. 412-281-6593. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Tony Campbell Jam Session. Ballroom. Jessica Lee, Mark Strickland, George Jones & Guest. Speakeasy. North Side. 412-904-3335. LEMONT. Ian Evans Trio. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100. THE MONROEVILLE RACQUET CLUB. Jazz Bean Live. Every Saturday, a different band. Monroeville. 412-728-4155. TABLE 86 BY HINES WARD. RML Jazz. Mars. 412-370-9621.

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FRI 02 CAPRI PIZZA AND BAR. Bombo Claat w/ VYBZ Machine Intl Sound System. East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

COUNTRY

SATURDAYS

BLACK N GOLD

SUNDAYS

THU 01 CLUB CAFE. Jeremiah Clark w/ Brad Yoder. South Side. 412-431-4950.

W O R L D FAM O U S BLOODY MARY & MIMOSA BAR SATURDAYS 8AM-4PM SUNDAYS 9AM-4PM SAT & SUN BREAKFAST 8AM-NOON

OTHER MUSIC FRI 02 BELVEDERE’S. End.user, Divtech, Decide Today, 8cylinder, Doverspike, MORGANTICS vs Spednar, Tall Timber. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555.

MON 05

HAPPY HOUR MON-FRI 5-7PM

$1 OFF ALL DRAFTS, MIXED DRINKS & WINE • HALF OFF APPETIZERS KITCHEN OPEN LATE EVERYDAY

3239 West Liberty Ave, Dormont, PA 15216

HAMBONE’S. Ian Kane. Jazz Standards, showtunes & blues. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

412-561-7444 • www.CainsSaloon.com

LAMPLIGHTER RESTAURANT. Aaron Lewinter. Irwin. 724-468-4545.

1LIVE STUDIO. DJ Goodnight: Open Elements. Avalon. 412-424-9254.

WED 07

SUN 04 BELVEDERE’S. Junk Food, CHEAP MUSIC. Album release. Lawrenceville. 412-758-6724.

THE BLIND PIG SALOON. Erin Burkett & Virgil Walters w/ Eric Susoeff & Mike Tomarro. New Kensington. 724-337-7008.

BLUES

ACOUSTIC

FRI 02

THU 01

BISTRO 9101. The Blues Orphans. McCandless. 412-635-2300. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Jim Adler w/ John Gresh’s Gris Gris. Downtown. 412-471-9100.

DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Scott & Roseanna. Robinson. 412-489-5631. ELWOOD’S PUB. West Deer Bluegrass Review. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181.

SAT 03

PITTSBURGH WINERY. Jimbo & the Soupbones. Strip District. 412-566-1000.

ARSENAL CIDER HOUSE & WINE CELLAR. Shelf Life String Band. Lawrenceville. 412-260-6968.

M A I N F E AT U R E

ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339. Pittsburgh Banjo Club. Wednesdays. North Side. 412-321-1834. PARK HOUSE. Shelf Life String Band. North Side. 412-224-2273.

TUE 06

SAT 03

ROTATIN S EASON G CRAFTS AL ON TAP

HAMBONE’S. Calliope Old Time Appalachian Jam. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

JAZZ

Danny Brown

SUN 04

MUSIC

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What to do Aug 31 - Sept 6 WEDNESDAY 31 Tweed

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 9p.m.

Killer Heels: The Art of the High-Heeled Shoe FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER Point Breeze. Tickets: killerheelsfrick.org. Through Sept. 4.

THURSDAY 1 Mac Sabbath

REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

Jeremiah Clark CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

Floyd Collins NEW HAZLETT THEATER

PAID ADVERTORIAL SPONSORED BY

IN PITTSBURGH PITTSBURGH RENAISSANCE FESTIVAL WEST NEWTON THROUGH SEPTEMBER 25

North Side. Tickets: frontporchpgh.com or 1-888-71-TICKETS. Through Sept. 4.

County Parks Summer Concert Series: Rusted Root with Nevada Color and more

FRIDAY 25 MERAUDER

HARDWOOD ACRES PARK. Free show. 7:30p.m.

CATTIVO Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 5:30p.m.

MONDAY 5 The 39 Steps

County Parks Summer Concert Series: River City Brass Band

CABARET AT THEATER SQUARE Downtown. Tickets: pittsburghclo.org. Through Sept. 11.

SOUTH PARK AMPHITHEATER. Free show. 7:30p.m.

TUESDAY 6

Chris Jamison

Butch Walker Stay Gold

THE OAKS THEATER Oakmont. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

SATURDAY 3

PigPen Theatre Co. REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

Tickets: pittsburghrenfest.com. Through Sept. 25.

Valley Queen

Death Victorious

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 7p.m.

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 10:30p.m.

SUNDAY 4

MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millville. 412-821-4447. All ages show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

Pittsburgh Renaissance Roger Humphries Festival Jam Session WEST NEWTON. All ages event.

AGNES KATZ PLAZA Downtown. Free event. 5p.m.

[DANCE]

“ED HAS JUST GONE ABOVE AND BEYOND WHAT HAS BEEN THOUGHT POSSIBLE.”

REVISITATION {BY STEVE SUCATO}

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

CorningWorks presents REMAINS — A ONE-WOMAN SHOW Wed., Sept. 7- Sun., Sept. 11. New Hazlett Theater, 6 Allegheny Square East, North Side. $25-30 (Sept. 11 show is pay-what-you-can). 888-718-4253 or www.newhazletttheater.org NEWS

[COMICS]

Beth Corning in Remains — A One-Woman Show {PHOTO COURTESY OF C. WALSH PHOTOGRAPHY}

Given that Beth Corning’s 2013 one-woman show Remains was an overwhelming critical success, it might seem that in revisiting the work, it would be counterproductive to change almost everything about it. But that’s what dancer/choreographer Corning and collaborator Dominique Serrand have done. The “new and improved” incarnation, entitled Remains — A One-Woman Show, will receive five performances, Sept. 7-11 at the New Hazlett Theater. Corning said that after the second performance of her company p y CorningWorks’ 2013 3 run of the work, Serrand told her that now they could really ly start to work on the piece. e. “I remember looking at him and thinking, ‘One, are you effing kidding me?’ And two, ‘You still want to work with me … cool,’” she says. ys. Serrand, a Tony Award-winning physicalsicaltheater director and co-artistic director of Minneapolis’ olis’ The Moving Company, has as been mentoring Corning on and off the past four or five years, helping her to think differently about how she approaches and creates her dance-theater works. The productions are typically part of Corning’s Glue Factory Project, for nationally or internationally known performers over age 40. While it’s uncommon in dance, productions are often redone in theater. That theatrical approach has been applied to Corning’s personal and poignant dance-theater piece about loss and what remains in terms of memories and objects. Set to an eclectic mix of music, the hour-long multimedia work was inspired by several of Corning’s lifechanging events. “I was in a really raw place when I originally made this work,” she says. This new version has roughly the same structure as the original, but the content is approached differently. Corning says she and Serrand have stripped away extraneous elements and added elements that further clarify the intent and arc of the work and her character within it. Also new will be costuming by award-winning costume designer Sonya Berlovitz, and a tourable set by Quantum Theatre’s Britton Mauk, both created specifically for the piece. “I like this piece. I want to further invest in it … and create it the way we [she and Serrand] envision it,” says Corning.

The Cold Crush Brothers, as depicted by Ed Piskor in Hip Hop Family Tree Book 4

HIT ’TOON {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

N AUG. 3, Fantagraphics published

Book 4 of Ed Piskor’s graphic history Hip Hop Family Tree. In comics, where self-publishing is common and most artists never get one full-color volume on a major publisher, four in three years is a very big deal. Still, those of us outside comics might not grasp how large and in charge Munhall resident Piskor has become with his vibrant, gritty and painstakingly researched portrait of the rise of hip hop, and the many characters who made it happen. The series, which debuted in 2013, has been critically hailed by everyone from Vice and Paste to NPR and Comic Book Resources — not to mention many of the hip-hop artists it depicts. Book 1, a New York Times best-seller, is in its sixth printing. Translations have been licensed in Japanese, German, French, Portuguese, Italian and Russian. Piskor is huge even for Seattle-based Fantagraphics, a leading independentcomics publisher that’s home to such stars as Chris Ware and Daniel Clowes. “Ed is our biggest breakout star of this decade,” writes Fantagraphics associate publisher Eric Reynolds via email. The series has changed its creator’s life: While he’s been cartooning full time for years, Piskor says, “The hip-hop comic is popular enough that I’m able to design my

M A I N F E AT U R E

alone, after an appearance at the Small Press Expo (SPX), in Maryland, he’ll speak at the Library of Congress’ National Book Festival, the country’s largest such fest. SPX executive director Warren Bernard calls HHFT “one of the ﬁnest pieces of graphicnovel history that’s ever been done.” Piskor’s fellow Pittsburgh-based comics artist Frank Santoro goes further. Santoro, also a critic, is internationally known for his comics, but he says that commercially and artistically, Piskor has reached another level entirely. “He’s now the most dominant player in the game [that] I’ve ever seen,” says Santoro. “Ed has just gone above and beyond what has been thought possible.”

Golden touch: Ed Piskor

career.” (Other bennies: getting to design, for his Japanese publisher, Presspop, new action ﬁgures of his all-time favorite group, Public Enemy.)

“ED IS OUR BIGGEST BREAKOUT STAR OF THIS DECADE.” Accolades for Piskor include last year’s coveted Eisner Award for best reality-based work, for HHFT Book 2. This year, he’s in mad demand as a speaker. In September

PISKOR, 34, was born in Munhall, and grew

up a working-class kid immersed in comics and ’80s hip-hop culture. After graduating from Steel Valley High School, he spent a year studying cartooning at New Jersey’s Kubert School. But much of his comics education came in Pittsburgh, hanging out at Bill Boichel’s Copacetic Comics and soaking up knowledge from older cartoonists like Santoro, Jim Rugg and Tom Scioli. In his early 20s, Piskor began making his name with contributions to Harvey Pekar’s fabled American Splendor series (thus joining a pantheon that included Piskor’s biggest inﬂuence, R. Crumb). Book-length CONTINUES ON PG. 40

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HIT ‘TOON, CONTINUED FROM PG. 39

Divas, drag queens and disco scenes.

B Y TA R E L L A LV I N M C C R A N E Y | D I R E C T E D B Y T O M É C O U S I N

9/09 | 9/25

Ronald Allan-Lindblom / Artistic Director Kim Martin / Producing Director

For tickets, www.pittsburghplayhouse.com or (412) 392-8000.

collaborations with Pekar followed — as did Wizzywig, Piskor’s own graphic novel, about a fictional computer hacker. In 2012, Rolling Stone called Wizzywig “the next big thing in graphic novels.” But by then, Piskor was already rolling on Hip Hop Family Tree, which premiered as a strip on website Boing Boing. The Fantagraphics deal followed; by the time the large-format Book 1 came out, in October 2013, it was already a word-of-mouth sensation. (SPX’s Bernard said HHFT transitioned from web to print better than any comic he can recall.) Rap luminary Biz Markie, for instance, called HHFT “the comic of all time.” The brand-new Book 4 covers 1984-85 and continues Piskor’s fine-grained take on hip hop’s story. With a cover featuring Salt-N-Pepa, it ranges from obscure figures like Egyptian Lover to the prehistory of NWA and the first house parties of DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince, even while extending the narratives of seminal figures like Russell Simmons, Run-DMC and KRSOne. Piskor also carefully paints the wider cultural backdrop: the crack epidemic, the MOVE disaster in Philadelphia, and mainstream culture’s first nods at hip hop, with movies like Krush Groove. Visually, Piskor summons the aesthetic of classic Marvel Comics (Jack Kirby, et al.), so that the story of rapper Roxanne Shante feels like a superhero tale, complete with colors digitally sampled from vintage comics. Cartoonist Santoro, also a writer for the online Comics Journal, enthuses that

kor

picted by Ed Pis

MC Shan as de

Piskor’s fusion of superhero-comics brio, sophisticated storytelling and culturally relevant subject matter has had an epochal effect. “He basically retooled comics, and he revved it back up,” says Santoro. “Culturally, Ed has just shattered the ceiling. There’s just no one in comics who can approach his reach.” Even those whose praise is more measured acknowledge Piskor’s potential. “It’s incredibly exciting to watch him blossom artistically,” says John Kelly, vice president of Pittsburgh’s ToonSeum. Copacetic Comics owner Bill Boichel, the godfather of the local comic scene, says Piskor is trying to bridge the gap between superhero fans and aﬁcionados of more literary comics forms: “He wants to synthesize a new audience. Ed’s nothing if not ambitious.” Asked about the impact of HHFT, Piskor sounds a more modest note. “I sort of found my voice with it. … Now it’s about not taking it for granted.” There seems little risk of that: Piskor’s work ethic is legendary. “He’s the hardest working guy I’ve ever met in my life,” says Kelly. Indeed, interviewed by phone in early August, Piskor — who also travels overseas to teach cartooning in Denmark — says, “I’ve basically been working into exhaustion regularly.” He’s not, however, toiling on the next volume of HHFT. “I’m not even thinking about it right now,” he says. Rather, he’s got a big new project, not yet publicly announced, that he’s pretty excited about. “I think Hip Hop Family Tree is probably going to be my life’s work,” Piskor acknowledges, but adds, “It was four and a half years working on that. I need to catch my breath.” D RI S C OL L @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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The first hit is free. blogh.pghcitypaper.com

Actually, so are all the others.

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{PHOTO COURTESY OF JOEY KENNEDY}

Olivier Ratsi’s Péle-Méle

[ART REVIEW]

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OUTER SPACES {BY NATALIE SPANNER} THE ENTRANCE to Wood Street Galleries

is tucked into a corner past an entrance to Downtown’s Wood Street T station that I’ve never used before. Traveling through a secret door to observe two installations about deep space made me feel like I was in a Doctor Who episode. But that was nothing compared to the installations themselves. French artist Olivier Ratsi’s Péle-Méle and Canadian artist Martin Messier’s Boîte Noire are two multimedia installations exploring concepts of time and space without overt stars or planets or bright-blue police boxes. Instead, the cleverly composed projections use basic shapes and lines to emphasize the viewer’s limited perception of space.

BOÎTE NOIRE AND PÉLE-MÉLE continue through Sun., Sept. 4. Wood Street Galleries, 601 Wood St., Downtown. 412-471-5605 or www.woodstreetgalleries.org

Péle-Méle concludes Ratsi’s Echolyse Project series. His aim was to explore the optical technique called anamorphosis. At ﬁrst glance, the image appears normal, but as the viewer moves around the space, its outer layers “peel” away, exposing the more complex action underneath. From a certain angle, the “peelings” (as Ratsi calls them in his artist’s statement) make you feel like you’re moving through a tunnel, though you’re standing still. Pair the peelings with the deep beats of the audial track, and you could be traveling through a wormhole, or the recesses of your root chakra, or a trippy

red Slinky. Péle-Méle means to move forward in haste; but ultimately there is something eerily calming about it that keeps you lingering through a few more cycles of the projections’ pattern … just a few more. My experience of Martin Messier’s Boîte Noire was a bit … well, “messier” (sorry). Structurally, the visual is a traditional story arc: A line first chaotically transforms into various shapes, stirring up curiosity and emotion, and then resumes its line form, providing catharsis if you want it. Add the high-pitched, scream-like underscore and blasts of disturbing low-frequency noise and the viewer can pick her poison — whatever “story” works. The viewer watches the projection filter through a giant clear prism and can interact with the specter-like projection before it hits the gallery wall. My heart pounded with each rise in pitch as I watched the line transform from a spasming cardiac monitor into an amoebic shape, the outline of Africa, and then cyclones of impending destruction. While watching something grow quickly out of control spooked me, I was thrilled with whatever had just happened. It got messier when the docent told me the recordings were from airplane black boxes. But what was the goal? The artist’s statement says, “It’s as if the box, filled with ghostly signals, was containing pieces of past events and with his installation, Messier invites the public to put history back together.” But is there a specific piece of history Messier wants us to consider? If that’s what the artist intended, it’s inadequately communicated here. It’s upsetting to be told your perception is limited, just as much as it is to see something no one else can. If you feel up to the challenge, don’t miss these installations at Wood Street Galleries. I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

Front Porch Theatricals Bruce E. G. Smith, Leon S. Zionts & Nancy D. Zionts, Producers

September 1-3 | 8PM September 4 | 2PM New Hazlett Theater 6 Allegheny Square East Pittsburgh, PA 15212 Tickets: www.frontporchpgh.com or frontporch.showclix.com or 1-888-71-TICKETS Ticket prices: $30 online, $35 at door, $24 Students & Groups {PHOTO COURTESY OF MARTHA DOLLAR SMITH}

From left: Danny McHugh, Gena Simms and Daniel Krell in Front Porch Theatricals’ Floyd Collins

[PLAY REVIEW]

kids 12 and under

UNDERGROUNDED

music which swirl around for what seems like hours. For a culture which finds Mam{BY TED HOOVER} ma Mia! an acceptable piece of “theater,” WELL, IT’S ABOUT time. A few years back, a the unyielding Floyd Collins will feel like a bunch of local folks formed Front Porch The- prison sentence. A huge raft of extraordinarily talented atricals and proceeded to stage show after dazzling show. I wondered if they were ever people work their butts off to put this show going to join us mortals down here on earth across. Andrew David Ostrowski’s lighting — you know, regular people who, no mat- and Lindsey B. Mayer’s set are terrifically ter how hard we try, just can’t get it right, evocative and theatrical. Director Rachel M. Stevens and music director Douglas Levine theatrically speaking. Or, to put it another way (and I’m sorry drive this cast to the outer limits of their to say it), Front Porch Theatricals’ produc- considerable talents. Danny McHugh’s got a powerful, emotion of Floyd Collins doesn’t work. tionally rich voice which he flings out again and again as Floyd, and which makes the FLOYD COLLINS character’s fate the spine of the show. Nacontinues through Sun., Sept. 4. Front than Salstone and Ryan Bergman do trePorch Theatricals at the New Hazlett mendous work as the two men trying the Theater, 6 Allegheny Square East, North Side. $24-35. www.frontporchpgh.com hardest to rescue Floyd. Lindsay Bayer is haunting as Floyd’s damaged sister, while It’s not entirely the company’s fault. Daniel Krell, Sandy Swier and Jonathan This 1996 musical from Adam Guettel and Visser contribute solid support. But still, it just never comes together. Tina Landau is, to put it mildly, one tough son of a bitch. It concerns the true story of There are little things: The 1970s Fosse a Kentucky caver who in 1925 got trapped choreography suddenly springing up in underground for 14 days. Happening as it 1925 is, to say the least, odd, and havdid near the advent of radio, the event being a secondary character snake silently came one of the first media sensations, and through the production like the ghost of thousands of people travelled to the pop-up Sylvia Plath doesn’t really add anything. But while those aspects aren’t good, carnival surrounding Collins. So you’ve got a musical in which the they’re not the problem. So much talent, lead character is immobile for two acts. I work and money has been expended on know — maybe a clutch of peppy, humma- a production which refuses to fly, yet for the life of me I’m unable to pinpoint the ble show tunes’ll liven it up! But if you know anything about com- exact problem. You spend a lot of time poser/lyricist Guettel (who also wrote The hoping that the show will spark and catch Light in the Piazza), you know that “peppy” fire … and when it doesn’t, you just hope and “hummable” are not in his vocabulary. it’ll end sooner. Welcome to the real world, Front What he does write are intensely methodical and excessively elevated swathes of Porch Theatricals.

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PghIrishFest.org A collaborative non-proﬁt for preservation & promotion of all things Irish.

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FOR THE WEEK OF

09.01-09.07.16 Full events listed online at www.pghcitypaper.com U.S. Steel’s old Carrie Furnaces site’s rebirth as a center for history and the arts heats up Sept. 3 with the second annual Festival of Combustion. This program of Rivers of Steel Arts (RoSA) takes place outdoors, in the shadow of two remaining blast furnaces that once produced up to 1,250 tons of iron a day. Considerably smaller quantities of metal and other materials will be in play as visitors of all ages try their hands at everything from painting with molten crayon and designing colorful glass mosaics (with help from Pittsburgh Glass Center) to firing their own ceramic works (with TON

{PHOTO COURTESY OF RIVERS OF STEEL ARTS}

Pottery) and even carving the sand mold into which craftsmen will pour iron or aluminum to create a take-home artwork. Last year’s fest drew 500, says RoSA chief curator Chris Mcginnis; new this year are contributions from Techshop Pittsburgh, including blacksmithing demonstrations and the group’s Fire Piano (press keys = shoot flames). There are also live welding and metal fabrication demos by the Mobile Sculpture Workshop; food trucks and Voodoo Brewing; and music by DJ Dave Zak and rockabilly band The Bessemers. The rain-or-shine event, in Rankin, also includes mini-tours of the site, a.k.a. the Carrie Furnaces National Historic Landmark.

{ART BY CYNTHIA CONSENTINO}

^ Fri., Sept. 2: An Anthology: Tales of Land, Sea & Sky

thursday 09.01

BY BILL O’DRISCOLL

Noon-8 p.m. Sat., Sept. 3. Rankin. $15 (free for kids under 18); additional workshops are $5-10 each. www.rosarts.org

stage

Pittsburgh New Works Festival launches its 26th season. The festival features new one-act plays by writers from all over as staged by local troupes. There are four programs of three plays each, and each program gets five performances at Carnegie Stages. Program A, tonight through Sept. 10, includes: Connecticutbased Bill Arnold’s “Deck Chairs,” set on a sinking Titanic (produced by Cup-A-Jo Productions); Australian playwright Michael Lill’s “All Good Things” (CCAC South); and local favorite F.J. Hartland’s “More Than Meets the Eye” (South Hills Players). Program B runs Sept. 2-11, followed by Programs C (Sept. 15-24) and D (Sept. 16-25). BO 8 p.m. 25 W. Main St., Carnegie. 412-944-2639 or www.pittsburghnewworks.org

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

ART It’s amazing what 100 years can do. In Women in Photography: 1839 to 1939, Photo Antiquities Museum of Photographic History celebrates the monumental changes in women’s fashion as well as in photographic styles and methods. Cracking open the vault, Women in Photography challenges the depiction of haircuts and makeup in period films and TV shows by laying bare the true fads and fashions that women (at least those who could afford a photographer) wore. Tyler Dague 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Exhibit continues through Oct. 31. 531 E. Ohio St., North Side. $10 (free for children 12). 412-231-7881 or www.photoantiquities.org

ART Even as Americans become saturated with online images, the building blocks remain obscured. Tonight, Silver Eye Center for Photography presents an artist discussion at Point Park University’s JVH Auditorium to accompany its latest exhibit, Materials & Processes: Imaging the

Elements of Photography. The exhibit celebrates the film, ink, paper, screens and pixels involved in image-capture. Moderated by Silver Eye’s David Oresick, the discussion features Materials artists from across the country, including Daniel Boardman, April Friges, Jessica Labatte, Andy Mattern, Zach Nader and Julie Weber. The exhibit itself opens with a reception at the gallery, on Friday. TD 6:30 p.m. (201 Wood St., Downtown; free). Gallery reception: 6-9 p.m. Fri., Sept. 2 (1015 E. Carson St., South Side; free). 412-431-1810 or www.silvereye.org

STAGE “Up close and personal” is this season’s motto for PICT Classic Theatre, which is staging five famed works at the former church now known as the Union Project. “Classics in the Raw” begins with Shirley Valentine. The 1986 work by British playwright Willy Russell (Educating Rita) is a one-woman show — a monologue by a bored, frustrated Liverpool housewife whose life is < Thu., Sept. 1: Women in Photography {IMAGE COURTESY OF PHOTO ANTIQUITIES}

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^ Thu., Sept. 1: Shirley Valentine

changed by an unexpected Greek vacation. PICT’s Alan Stanford directs local favorite Karen Baum in the role. The first performance is tonight. Bill O’Driscoll 8 p.m. Show continues through Sept. 17. 801 N. Negley Ave., Highland Park. $15-50. 412-561-6000 or www.picttheatre.org

friday 09.02

T h i s nd e Weekly! On

ART Ceramic knickknacks get an artfull remix in the work of Cynthia Consentino. Think porcelain madonnas with the he heads of songbirds or baby dolls. Tonight, the Massachusetts-based artist, whose work has been exhibited nationally and internationally, opens a new show at Gallerie Chiz. The reception forr An Anthology: Tales of Land, Sea a& Sky includes an artist talk, and the e event is part of the monthly FirstFriday Friday ArtWalk on Ellsworth Avenue. The he gallery will donate 10 percent of opening-night sales to the Persad d Center. BO 5:30-8:30 p.m. 5831 Ellsworth llsworth Ave., Shadyside. 412-441-6005 or www.galleriechiz.com

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STAGE You’ve tried tapas, and beer flights. hts. How about “an evening of bite-sized ized ideas”? Tonight and tomorrow, The Space Upstairs presents four of itss new resident and apprentice movement nt artists for small plates of performance, ance, from Sarah Jeffers’ “evolving encounters ounters with light” to Sarah Friedlander’s “course {ART BY ANDY MATTERN / IMAGE COURTESY OF THE ARTIST} ^ Thu., Sept. 1: Materials & Processes of nonfiction in dance-for-the-camera.” mera.” This Performance Tasting also features atures The Ellipses Condition (lead Space e Upstairs resident artists John Lambert and Pearlann Porter) sneak-peeking dance work de Jazz. Other i their h i new d k Pas d h attractions include live painting on top of the projected shadows of dancers. BO 9 p.m. (doors at 8 p.m.). Also 9 p.m. Sat., Sept. 3. 214 N. Lexington St., Point Breeze. $10 suggested donation. www.thespaceupstairs.org

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^ Mon., Sept. 5: Allegheny County Parks

saturday 09.03 STAGE Slapstick, puns, mistaken identities, separations at birth and demonic possession? Pittsburgh Shakespeare in the Parks opens its production of Comedy of Errors today in Frick Park. Subsequent performances of Shakespeare’s ancient-Greek mishaps will take place in tomorrow in Pymatuning State Park, in Linesville; Highland Park (Sept. 10 and 11); Arsenal Park (Sept. 17 and 18); and, once again, Frick Park (Sept. 24 and 25). In this production, nine cast members play at a manic pace to incorporate elaborate costume changes at high speed. TD 2 p.m. (Frick Park, Beechwood Boulevard and Nicholson Street, Squirrel Hill). Continues at various venues through Sept. 25. Free (donations accepted). 412-404-8531 or www. pittsburghshakespeare.com

ART Celebrating a nearly 60-year career in the visual arts, Chatham Art Gallery revisits its first-ever solo student show today with works from Fox Chapel artist Fran Venardos Gialamas. Since that opening, in 1958, when she was a Chatham University {PHOTO COURTESY OF DAWN HARTMAN PHOTOGRAPHY} junior, Gialamas’ prints and ^ Fri., Sept. 2: Performance Tasting photos, often depicting life in a steel town, have been displayed regionally and at the Ceres Gallery, in Manhattan. Chronicles of a Chatham Art Major holds a public reception today. TD 2-6 p.m. Exhibit continues through Oct. 16. 5798 W. Woodland Road, Shadyside. Free. 412-365-1232 or www.chatham.edu

monday 09.05 OUTDOORS Summer’s final official Day Off is a fine time to barbecue, but you also needn’t travel far for outdoor recreation. The Allegheny County Parks, for instance, have a full slate of activities: The tennis courts are open, as are golf courses, spray parks, wave pools, and Kayak Pittsburgh’s bike and boat rentals at the North Park Boathouse. There’s even special programming, like this morning’s free Beginner Birding session at the South Park Grant Shelter, this afternoon’s free outdoorand hiking-safety class at Deer Lakes Park — and the first annual Pooches in the Pool ($15-20), which allows one dog per human to splash into the North Park Swimming Pool. All special events either require or recommend pre-registration, available online. BO www.alleghenycounty.us/parks

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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This is my second time participating, so I’m super excited to be here — very excited to see what people have come up with for a subject that can be incredibly blasphemous or incredibly tender or incredibly painful. It’s really interesting to see how many people have approached this with humor and panache. I just think it’s fantastic that people can take hang-ups or admiration or deep-seated thoughts that they’ve had about a sacred subject in some peoples’ minds and be very honest about it. It’s just a fantastic opportunity to come back. My best friends live here. I come back for events like this and to see my family-in-air-quotes from Lawrenceville.

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FESTIVAL Let’s face it: Crossing the pond is not cheap. However, for the second year running, British-American Connections Pittsburgh is bringing the U.K. to the Steel City, for Britsburgh 2016. The six-day event begins today at East End Brewing with the ceremonial tapping of the English-style bitter Britsburgh Ale and a concert from local rock band The Honeyriders. Subsequent events include a Jane Austen film discussion and reception at Duquesne University; new and classic British farce and satire at Arcade Comedy Theater; traditional afternoon tea; chocolate and cheese at the Victorian Lady of Academy Hill, in Greensburg; local-history walking tours; British Invasion concerts at the Carnegie Museum of Art; and much more. TD 4-10 p.m. (East End Brewing, 147 Julius St., Larimer; free). Festival continues through Sun., Sept. 11. 412-478-1756 or www.bacpgh.com

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Artists are perennially underpaid. But why? That’s the fundamental question addressed by WAGE {PHOTO COURTESY OF BRITSBURGH} (Working Artists and ^ Tue., Sept. 6: Britsburgh 2016 the Greater Economy), a New York-based activist group working to regulate the payment of artist fees by nonprofit arts groups, and to establish “a sustainable labor relation between artists and the institutions that contract them.” WAGE core organizer Lise Soskolne offers a public presentation and workshop, aimed at artists and arts administrators, tonight at Neu Kirche Contemporary Art Center. Soskolne will discuss WAGE’s certification program for recognizing nonprofits that voluntarily pay artist fees that meet a minimum standard. BO 7 p.m. 1000 Madison Ave., North Side. Free. www.neukirche.org

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the

WE WERE IMPRESSED THAT TOTOPO OFFERS TWO STYLES OF TAMALES

A CITY DELI {BY REBECCA ADDISON} Wesley’s Delicatessen, in Downtown, as all the makings of a long-established neighborhood deli. The staff is friendly and has an easy familiarity with customers. The menu features deli sandwiches and salads, along with an assortment of traditional sides like Italian Wedding soup and farfalle pasta salad. And yet, the venue has only been open for about three years. “Equally as important as food is creating that comfortable environment and having some kind of personality, instead of just being a machine,” says deli co-owner Wesley Ross. “And I think that’s one of the reasons people come back. We have great food, but it’s also about being friendly, learning people’s names.” But charm isn’t the only thing creating the old-timey atmosphere at Wesley’s. The deli is located in Downtown’s old Bank Tower building, so the shop’s storeroom sits in an old safe, and the safe-deposit box rooms serve as storage closets. “I have a lot of respect for this building,” says Ross. “It’s great to see the old architecture.” Wesley’s menu features more than 20 sandwiches named for Pittsburgh neighborhoods, streets and buildings. The East Ender is the most popular sandwich (smoked turkey breast, cheddar cheese, two strips of bacon, lettuce, tomato and mayo). “Some of these sandwiches I haven’t had since we opened,” says Ross. “And then I’ll try them, and say, ‘Wow, that’s good.’” Ross says that first-timers usually go for the Bloomfield Italian Beef (shaved steak grilled with sautéed mushrooms, onions, provolone cheese, American cheese and mayo) or the Strip District (hard salami, sopressata, capicola, ham, provolone, banana-pepper rings, lettuce, tomato and garlic aioli). And during City Paper’s interview, that prediction proved true when a new customer ordered the Strip District. “I just know,” Ross said. RNUTTALL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

307 Fourth Ave., Downtown. 412-281-3354

[CORRECTION] Last week’s Side column about Brentwood’s Nepali Bazaar incorrectly stated that 5,000 Bhutanese refugees have been resettled in Pittsburgh. Two thousand have been resettled by agencies, while an additional 3,000 have settled in Pittsburgh through secondary migration.

{CP PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

Grilled shrimp, bell peppers, peas, onions and asparagus sautéed in a spicy chipotle sauce. Served over cilantro rice and topped with tortilla strips.

MEX-AMERICAN

FAVORITES {BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

HE TRANSFORMATION of Mexican

dining in Pittsburgh over the past two decades has been a godsend for those of us craving more — and more authentic — than simply seasoned ground beef, iceberg lettuce and margarita mix. While we’re still waiting for Mexican cuisine to receive the deeply authentic, regional approach that has been lavished on Italian and even Indian food, Pittsburgh now has a fairly solid line-up of taquerias, and the sit-down options have improved as well. For the most part, we now expect the bland Mexican-American cuisine of yore only at the chains and a few tired holdouts. The decor of Totopo Mexican Kitchen and Bar in Mount Lebanon evokes familiar tropes — cobalt-blue tiles, rustic metalwork

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

— in a stylish, vaguely sophisticated way. A cursory glance at its menu formed a similar impression: entrees consist mainly of tacos, burritos and enchiladas ﬁlled with

TOTOPO MEXICAN KITCHEN AND BAR 660 Washington Road, Mount Lebanon. 412-668-0773 HOURS: Mon.-Thu. 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Fri.-Sat. 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sun 11 a.m.-9 p.m. PRICES: $8-17 LIQUOR: Full bar

chicken or (ground) beef, while sides are limited to salad, black beans, refried beans and “ﬁesta rice,” complete with corn and peas. But the menu also highlights a few

of the country’s regional traditions and is large enough to offer such variety as tamales in both northern and southern styles. “Totopo” is the word for “tortilla chip” in Nahuatl, the language of the Aztecs, so we were pleased to have a complimentary bowl of warm, housemade chips brought to our table. Unsalted, they cried out to be dipped in the accompanying salsa, but it was disappointing — puréed and mild to the point of blandness. That was not the case with tortilla soup, however. Typically, the broth of this soup is based on chicken stock, and it often contains chicken, as well. Totopo’s was a vegetarian version with a thick, almost creamy texture that had more in common with a good tomato soup or, even, a bisque. The

flavor was tomatoey as well, but subtly so, with plenty of savor and seasonings that stopped just short of spiciness. Labor-intensive tamales of any style aren’t common at local restaurants, so we were impressed that Totopo offers two. Northern-style, a steamed corn husk filled with meat, is by far the more familiar to Americans. Totopo’s had been cooked (or formed) poorly, so that it was dried out at one end and didn’t have a lot of flavor regardless. But the new-to-us southern style — cheese and poblano, but no meat, wrapped in a banana leaf — was much more interesting and better-tasting. Actually, what was most striking was the texture: Where husk-wrapped tamales tend to be relatively dry, the masa harina in the banana-leaf version was soft and moist, almost custard-like, with the cheese in the filling blending seamlessly into the corn. It would have benefitted from a distinctive salsa, but it was a treat nonetheless. In general, even where Totopo stuck to Mexican-menu standards, it executed at a high level. Fiesta rice tasted ho-hum, but the texture — light and fluffy and perfectly moist — was far superior to what old-school Mexican places cooked up. Similarly, Totopo’s refried beans looked like all the rest, but offered more depth of flavor, and a slightly looser texture, than most. The ground beef taco was too mild — the bottle of Cholula hot sauce on our table got a workout — but the texture was excellent, and there was enough seasoning to enjoy the crumbles that fell to the plate on their own. We also had a mixed verdict about the Ensenada fish tacos. They were well proportioned and filled with excellent tempura-style cod, but the slaw was strangely sweet and the creamy chipotle sauce added virtually no heat. A too-sweet cilantro dressing also ruined (for us) an otherwise perfectly acceptable green salad. Enchiladas, burritos, tacos, quesadillas and other Mexican-restaurant classics can be ordered in meal-size portions on their own or in combos with others. This is great for people like Angelique, who have a hard time narrowing down their favorites. An enchilada verde and chile relleno combo was satisfying enough, but unremarkable. But a “drowned” burrito — with a roastedtomato salsa on top — finally brought a little kick to the table. Far from expanding the options of Mexican dining in Pittsburgh, Totopo is more of an upscale version of the Mex-American restaurants that were our gateway to the cuisine decades ago. This is about as good as that style of cooking can be, and we would be remiss if we didn’t mention that the margaritas are made with fresh citrus juiced in-house. INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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[PERSONAL CHEF]

CHANTERELLE PASTA {BY CELINE ROBERTS} A few weeks ago on a quiet Sunday morning, I went on a walk in the damp Pennsylvania woods with wild foragers, Cavan and Tom Patterson. We scanned the ground for the beautiful melon-colored folds of chanterelle mushrooms, a common but incredibly delicious mushroom that grows in this area. (Hear more about chanterelles from the Pattersons on this week’s edition of CP’s food podcast, Sound Bite.) There is something awe-inspiring about mushrooms. Maybe it’s their association with fairy tales, or that one sort-of mushroom — the honey fungus — makes up the largest organism on earth. Or perhaps it’s that they taste like earth and sun. Regardless, the fact that something so tasty is just growing wild in the woods somewhere is enough. At home with my boots off, I wanted to prepare them as simply a as possible to appreciate their ir delicate flavor.

$5 Margaritas $1 off Mexican Beers $2 off appetizers

INGREDIENTS • 16 oz. pasta (Any shape off pasta that holds lds sauce well willl do. I prefer varieties ies like cavatelli, casarecce or campanelle.) • 2 shallots, finely sliced • 1 head of garlic, minced • 1 pint chanterelle mushrooms, cleaned and sliced • 1-2 large Cherokee Purple (or other) tomatoes, roughly chopped • 2 tbsp. (i.e. a quick pour) dry white white • Salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste. • 3 tbsp. butter, salted or unsalted (plus any more as needed) eded) INSTRUCTIONS Bring a pot of salted water to a boil. Add pasta and cook until just al dente. Drain, saving ving a cup off pasta water for possible addition to sauce. Set aside. Melt butter in a large sauce pan. Add shallots and garlic. Sauté over high heat for two minutes, until fragrant. Add chanterelles and cook for two minutes. Deglaze pan with a quick pour of white wine. Reduce heat to medium and add tomatoes. The mixture will have a lot of moisture: Reduce until it thickens. Add pasta and stir until incorporated, another one to two minutes. For extra flavor, add grated parmesan or chopped parsley before serving. Or just enjoy it simply, as is. Serves four to five. CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

WE WANT YOUR PERSONAL RECIPES AND THE STORIES BEHIND THEM. EMAIL THEM TO CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

Cocktail & Sons’ limited-release Fassionola

FOR BOOZE enthusiasts who enjoy poring

over recipes in old cocktail books or tinkering in their kitchens, obscure ingredients are alluring. John Pyles, a guest bartender at Maggie’s Farm Rum Distillery, is one such tinkerer. Over the years, Pyles has made appearances behind the bars of the now-closed Embury, the rebranded Harvard & Highland, and Tender, all establishments known for delving into forgotten or classic ingredients. Each time we crossed paths, he was working on something new. During our most recent run-in, over daiquiris, the ingredient du jour was fassionola. Fassionola is a red fruit syrup added to cocktails. The history and speciﬁcs of fassionola, however, are somewhat murky. According to Amy McCarthy’s 2015 article in Eater, it is thought have been popularized in the 1930s by tiki-cocktail king Don the Beachcomber, a.k.a. Donn Beach. He was notoriously secretive about his ingredients, going so far as to pre-batch mixes into coded label bottles to protect recipes from rival barowners. Many of Beach’s mixes have now been deconstructed by Jeff “Beachbum” Berry and others, but his recipe for fassionola is lost to time. Some theorize that it may have simply been pog juice, a Hawaiian blend of passion fruit, orange and guava juices. According to Pyles, contemporary recreations often rely heavily on berry and passion-fruit ﬂavors, while others try to hack the recipe using Hawaiian punch, or grenadine and raspberry jam. His own blend uses passion fruit, pineapple, straw-

berry, raspberry, lime and grenadine. I took to the dark corners of the internet to see what other tiki enthusiasts reported using, and the answers came back overwhelmingly weighted toward passion fruit. Fassionola hasn’t been available widely for commercial sale since the ’80s. Pyles directed me to Cocktail & Sons, a company based in New Orleans that had a limitedrelease, commercial version of fassionola last April. According to its website, this “blend of Louisiana strawberries, freshcut pineapple and mango, passion fruit, hibiscus and lime” was available only until June, with “the limited availability based on Louisiana strawberry ﬁelds.” Max Messier, co-founder of Cocktail & Sons, is dedicated to using only Louisiana strawberries and is working with the farmer to plant enough for a re-release next spring. Pyles, however, had bought two bottles, one for himself and one for Adam Henry, co-owner of Squirrel Hill’s Hidden Harbor. The purchase began his exploration in making his own recipe. Henry also developed a version previously. On its menu, there is a Fassionola Fizz, made from gin, lemon, fassionola, egg white, cream, seltzer and orange ﬂower water, as well as the Rum Barrell made with the syrup. Two more are in the works. While craft-cocktailing grows and an interest in housemade ingredients continues, these lost recipes are seeing a resurgence in Pittsburgh and beyond. In fact, in a few weeks we’ll have the details on a new project that harnesses this same idea.

“THE ANSWERS CAME BACK OVERWHELMINGLY WEIGHTED TOWARD PASSION FRUIT.”

C E L I N E @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

BOOZE BATTLES {BY CELINE ROBERTS}

Each week, we order the same cocktail at two different bars for a friendly head-to-head battle. Go to the bars, taste them both and tell us what you like about each by tagging @pghcitypaper on Twitter or Instagram and use #CPBoozeBattles. If you want to be a part of Booze Battles, send an email to food-and-beverage writer Celine Roberts, at celine@pghcitypaper.com.

THE DRINK: SMASH

VS.

Stagioni

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DRINK: Peach Smash INGREDIENTS: peach-infused Bulleit bourbon, mint, orange, lemon, mint garnish OUR TAKE: The smell of fresh mint, concentrated but light, plays on the first sip of this cocktail. Smashes, a delightful summer concoction of seasonal fruit, ice and spirits, are a perfect way to use fruit without over-sweetening a cocktail. Because the fruit is simply muddled but not blended, the pulp lends a creamy texture. The small peaches used in this drink are perfectly ripe and taste as though they’ve just been picked off the tree.

DRINK: Clementine Smash INGREDIENTS: Eagle Rare bourbon, clementine, mint OUR TAKE: The clementine flavor of this smash is bold, tart and punchy. A slight bitterness from the citrus oils helps to balance the sweetness of the fruit. The drink is free of pulp and light on ice, giving it a very clean mouthfeel. Mint appears as a minor secondary note, just enough to taste at first. Bourbon makes a stronger appearance throughout, making this a boozy rendition of a smash.

This week on Five Minutes in Food History: Spend five minutes with Heinz History Center’s Brian Butko, who discusses the history of Isaly’s. www.pghcitypaper.com

One Bordeaux, One Scotch, One Beer Dogfish Head Namaste Retail Price: $10.99 / six-pack I’ never done yoga, but I assume this is the beer they shotgun after I’ve a class of perfect vinyasas. Namaste is a refreshing Belgian witbier, brewed with coriander and peppercorn, perfect for quenching your b tthirst after a strenuous session. Go yoga! — RECOMMENDED BY ALEX GORDON, CITY PAPER WEB PRODUCER AND STAFF MOONLIGHTER AT BIERPORT

Dogfish Head Namaste is available at Bierport. www.bierportpgh.com

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BLIND HORROR {BY AL HOFF}

IT’S A MASTER CLASS IN ARTFUL CRYING; SILENT TEARS ROLLING DOWN EXQUISITE CHEEKBONES

After getting a tip that a reclusive blind veteran is harboring a huge stash of settlement cash at his home in a deserted Detroit neighborhood, three twentysomething burglars see a chance for easy pickings. But in Fede Alvarez’s compact thriller Don’t Breathe, things go wrong from the start. Once inside, the intruders — including Alex (Dylan Minnette) and Rocky (Jane Levy) — fail to neutralize the unnamed Blind Man (Stephen Lang), and quickly discover he’s a terrifying and surprisingly adept adversary. And for good reason — there is a bunch of cash; his seemingly ordinary house is a locked and barred fortress, and nearly impossible to escape.

L ove HURTS

Rocky (Jane Levy) tries not to breathe.

Don’t Breathe is stripped-down version of the classic siege thriller: It’s basically three people (and a Rottweiler) trapped in a small space, all operating in kill-orbe-killed mode. There’s no CGI or quippy dialogue, and the film leans more into building tension than deploying jumpout scares. Alvarez’s camera explores every nook and cranny, shifting around like another nervous character. All that available space initially seems like a plus for the intruders who can see it, but the Blind Man has a next-level spatial intimacy with his home. The sighted do have another advantage (as do the viewers) in noting all the common household objects that might become weapons. There are nerve-wracking scenes set in the dark (advantage: Blind Man), but don’t expect things to get any less fraught when the lights do come on. And if you think silence is scary, it’s got nothing on an ill-timed creak of the floor. No spoilers, but the film is also notable for having no clear heroes. Sure, the Blind Man is trying to kill the good-looking young people, but they did break into his house to steal all his money. Viewers may find their sympathies shifting, particularly as events play out. Admittedly, the plot gets a bit baroque in the final third, but the screening audience loved it, responding with enthusiastic gasps and cheers.

{BY AL HOFF}

IKE A WARM breeze blowing across the beach on that wistful last day of .summer comes The Light Between the Oceans, a romantic, heartwarming tear-jerker set on a rocky island in a gauzy past. Director Derek Cianfrance lushly adapts M.L. Stedman’s eponymous novel with mixed results. It’s sure to satisfy fans of the genre; it’s dreadfully hokey, but painfully sincere. The plot is fairly simple. After World War I, Tom (Michael Fassbender) takes a job manning a lighthouse on a remote Australia island. He marries a local girl, Isabel (Alicia Vikander), and the two make the island their love nest. Then a small boat washes ashore; in it, an infant. They claim the baby as their own — who’s to know, except maybe the child has a family somewhere …? Maybe it was the Island Where It Is Always Sunset, or the traumatic event during a torrential rainstorm, but I couldn’t help feeling this was simply a superior grade of a Nicholas Sparks ﬁlm. It’s got the

AHOFF@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

But we were so happy: Michael Fassbender and Alicia Vikander

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weepy melodrama, with its obvious twists and turns, and an emotionally damaged hero saved by the love of a vibrant young woman. (Bonus broken thing: a piano.) There is much canoodling by soft light, be it evening’s gloaming or an oil lamp. Love is declared: inked in letters, uttered in heartfelt pleas and etched on grave markers. There are winds that never stop sweeping, seas that never stop pounding and tears that never stop falling.

THE LIGHT BETWEEN THE OCEANS DIRECTED BY: Derek Cianfrance STARS: Michael Fassbender, Alicia Vikander, Rachel Weisz Starts Fri., Sept. 2

Fassbender and Vikander are righteous pros who sell the bejesus out of this tale, barreling into this material like they’re living it, delivering giddy highs and sorrowful lows. They give a master class in artful

crying, with silent tears rolling down exquisite cheekbones; I really did feel sorry for them. It’s just about enough to make you forget that the plot is quite contrived, a series of coincidental (and not very likely) events designed to showcase how tragic life can be. It’s a narrative roundelay where love causes sorrow, which can only be combated with more love, which causes more sorrow, and so on. During the ﬁlm’s slower times — the overall pace is quite leisurely — I felt transported to a lifestyle catalog, the Vintage Coastal Lighthouse edition. This ﬁlm is truly lovely to look at — from its gorgeous stars and dramatic ocean vistas to justso cozy cottages and beachcombing togs. Imagine the rangy Fassbender in a handknit turtleneck, breeches tucked into boots, languidly posed against a whitewashed fence. Or Vikander, collecting eggs from free-range hens, while the wind adorably whips her linen tunic around her leggings. Sigh. How can this life be so sad? A H OF F @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN. Kirk vs. Khan, ’nuff said. Nicholas Meyer directs this 1982 sci-fi actioner featuring all the beloved Trekkers including William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy and Ricardo Montalban. Sept. 2-6 and Sept. 8. (The 9:45 p.m. Fri., Sept. 2, screening is the RiffTrax Edition.) Row House Cinema

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NEW HANDS OF STONE. Last summer, Creed was the miracle movie that proved you could re-package the familiar rags-to-riches boxing tale, even pack it full of sentimental drivel, and still have a crowd-pleasing hit. Alas, Jonathan Jakubowicz’s bio-pic about Panamanian boxer Roberto Duran (Edgar Ramirez) and his coach, Ray Arcel (Robert De Niro), is simply a poorly constructed checklist of everything we’re weary of. There is the awkward shoehorning of past events, whether geopolitical, like the U.S.’s control of the Panama Canal, or personal, like Arcel’s encounter with a mobster (shot in scary and “historical” black and white). A poor kid who shoots to fame and winds up passed out under a disco ball. The showy girlfriend/wife who wears a lot of skimpy outfits. The super-duper critical fight, in this case, Duran’s bout with Sugar Ray Leonard (Usher Raymond). A crisis of confidence. A montage of training scenes. A crusty but lovable coach who says things like: “boxing is a mental sport,” “to rest is to rust” and “luck is a woman you need to learn to seduce.” It’s doubly frustrating, because one can see the bones of a good story here, about a fighter who struggles publicly and privately while caught between cultures and expectations. De Niro is better than usual (a low bar these days), leaving mostly Ramirez to hold up the film. And it’s a lot of boxing-movie bulk to carry for 15 rounds. (AH) MORGAN. Luke Scott directs this thriller about the ethical questions surrounding an artificially intelligent “human,” and whether to let it live. Kate Mara, Anna Taylor-Joy and Paul Giamatti star. Starts Fri., Sept. 2 MY KING. A skiing accident lands Toni (Emmanuelle Bercot) and her shredded knee in a rehabilitation center for six weeks, and while there, she reflects on her courtship with and marriage to Georgio (Vincent Cassel). They meet cute in a bar, and then it’s a whirlwind of giddiness. Despite the reservations of some friends, the couple gets pregnant, and then married. But, alas, it is an amour fou, and the director, the singularly named Maiwenn, devotes the film’s two hours to showing us in no uncertain terms how these two people can’t live with each other, can’t live without each other. No partner is innocent, but the story is told from Toni’s perspective, so Georgio morphs from dream date to monster. Cassel is fantastic in the role, nimbly cycling through what makes Georgio so wonderful and so awful. Early on, Cassel, who has often played villains in assorted thrillers, really turns on the charm: The Georgio whom Toni falls for is flirty and fun; his blue eyes reflect the sparkle of an enraptured lover, not the the ice-cold focus of an assassin. Bercot is great, as well; for all the shouting, some of her best scenes are devastating silences. But what of Toni? How does this smart, vibrant modern woman get entangled with a dangerous character like Georgio? Ultimately, her battle isn’t to change Georgio, but to understand herself, despite the never-ending complications that marriage, ex-marriage and children continue to present. Nothing in the subject matter is new — so many messy relationships — but the film is enthralling, at times raw, then exhilarating, and even funny. The framing device of being cooped up in the rehab with nothing but time to reflect was a bit obvious, and the opening scene about how a knee can move only backward was a groaner. But if nothing else, it was worth it to

NEWS

STAR TREK IV: VOYAGE HOME. Leonard Nimoy directed this 1986 film, which concludes the tale begun in The Wrath of Khan; the Enterprise gang flies to 1980s San Francisco, where they talk to whales. Sept. 2-4 and Sept. 6-8. Row House Cinema STAR TREK: FIRST CONTACT. Capt. Picard (Patrick Stewart) steers the Enterprise-E and its crew back in time, hoping to prevent the Borg from making contact with Earth. Jonathan Frakes directs this 1996 sci-fi adventure. Sept. 2-8. Row House Cinema

Hands of Stone see how other countries manage health care. Nobody here ever busted a knee and spent six weeks at a beach-side rehab. In French, with subtitles. Starts Fri., Sept. 2. Regent Square (AH) THE 9TH LIFE OF LOUIS DRAX. A doctor seeks to discover what it means that a young boy seems to have extrasensory skills — a sixth sense — in this thriller directed by Alexandre Aja. Jamie Dornan (50 Shades of Grey) stars. Starts Fri., Sept. 2. AMC Loews Waterfront PATIENT ZERO. Stefan Ruzowitzky directs this thriller about a pandemic that has reduced much of the planet’s human population to violent “Infected,” and the man who has a plan to sort it out. Natalie Dormer, Clive Standen and Stanley Tucci star. Starts Fri., Sept. 2

GOODFELLAS. Spend more time with The Family in Martin Scorsese’s 1990 drama, a searing, profanely funny account of real-life mobster (and FBI informant) Henry Hill. Starring Ray Liotta, Joe Pesci and Robert DeNiro, plus quite a few future Sopranos cast members. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Aug. 31. AMC Loews Waterfront. $5 STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE. The first big-screen adaptation of the TV series reunites the original cast members, as the Enterprise fights a giant alien cloud on a path to destroy Earth. Robert Wise directs this 1979 actioner. Sept. 2-5 and Sept. 7-8. Row House Cinema

THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION. In 1994, Frank Darabont adapted Stephen King’s novella about a group of prisoners at Maine’s Shawshank State Prison. It fared poorly in theaters, but the inspirational drama of men who struggle to preserve their hopes and dignity found new life on video. Shawshank trades in plenty of prison clichés, but the film wins us over with its careful presentation of the day-to-day, stretched over 20 years and supported by top-notch performances from Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman as inmates and pals. As such, we willingly surrender to the wildly improbable but sentimental conclusion. See it on the big screen and let yourself feel good. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Sept. 7. AMC Loews Waterfront. $5 (AH) ONE MORE TIME WITH FEELING. Andrew Dominik (The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford) directs this new concert film, featuring new material from Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds in performance, as well as interviews and other footage. It is shot in black-and-white, and the press notes promise “ruminations” from Cave. 8 p.m. Thu., Sept. 8. Hollywood

My King

REPERTORY DOLLAR BANK CINEMA IN THE PARK. Last film of the summer! Star Wars: Episode VII — The Force Awakens, Wed., Aug. 31 (Schenley). Film begins at dusk. 412-255-2493 or www.citiparks.net. Free SUPERIOR. Catch this sneak preview of Edd Benda’s new film, inspired by the true story of two young Michigan men in 1969 — one poised to go to college, the other to join the war in Vietnam — who undertake one last summer adventure: a two-week, 1,300mile bike ride around Lake Superior. Benda, who has ties to the South Hills, will lead a Q&A after the film. 7 p.m. Wed., Aug. 31. SouthSide Works

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GAME DAY MANNERS

“I FIGURED IT WOULD BE A GOOD STORY ABOUT SOME CREEP, OR I’D PLAY ROLLER DERBY.”

{BY CHARLIE DEITCH} For some, Friday will just be Sept. 2. For other, it will be the official unofficial start of fall when the WPIAL football season gets underway. It’s a special time of year around these parts. Throngs of fans — whether they have any kids playing or not — will crowd into stadiums across the region to watch teenagers play one of this country’s most popular games. And as the season nears, I want to stress that a sense of decorum should be exercised at all times. Here a few things to keep in mind:

These are kids. Please don’t yell at them like they were Kordell Stewart or Bubby Brister. It’s fine to go to the game and have a good time, but if you’re over the age of 20 — and especially if you’re over the age of 35 — and you’re telling some sophomore from South Fayette that he sucks ass, I submit that you are the one who sucks ass and maybe you should just stay home, Netflix Varsity Blues and yell at James Van Der Beek. {CP PHOTO BY STEPHEN CARUSO}

The official will not change his call just because you insult his mother. Like you, a high-school-football referee loves his mother. So remember how mad you get when someone insults her. Remember that while these guys do have some training and do get paid a nominal fee, they’re not Ed Hochuli and Gene Steratore. They will make mistakes; we all make mistakes. You charging the field when he flags your son for the chop block you taught him is a mistake.

Nobody wants to hear about how much the game has changed since you played. Chances are you were not as good at this game as you thought you were. In your head, you see yourself as James Harrison making a 90-yard interception return for a touchdown during the Super Bowl. In reality, you looked more like Harrison Ford trying to move his old knees around the galaxy in the last Star Wars film.

Relax. If you enjoy going to the games, then you should definitely go, as long as you remember that it’s only a game.

The Steel City Roller Derby faced Toronto in their last game of the travel season on Aug. 20.

FREE SKATE {BY STEPHEN CARUSO}

pseudonyms and rambunctious benches, roller derby may seem a bit intimidating to the uninitiated or unathletic. But anyone, big or small, is welcome to strap on skates and give it a go. Just ask Bonecrusher. “Roller derby is a really welcoming sport,” the deliverer of separated shoulders and cracked ribs says. In fact, the veteran of Steel City Roller Derby, Pittsburgh’s derby league since 2006, is so tough, a teammate lamented that “I hit her, and I broke.” The league’s main team is known as the Steel Hurtin’. Known as Jen Booth in civilian life, Bonecrusher got interested in the sport by watching a reality show that featured roller derby. A bout matches two teams, each with four blockers and a jammer, all on skates. The two teams’ blockers attempt to clear a path for their jammer (while holding off the other team’s). Points are awarded depending on how many opposing players the jammer passes.

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ITH ITS HARD HITS, clever player

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“I didn’t like the reality show,” Booth That new face — taken more literally says. “But I liked the action.” by some with the application of glitter and After seeing an ad on Craigslist seeking paint — helps the players liberate themfemale derby skaters, she decided to give it selves from society’s stereotypical views on a shot. female behavior. That’s part of what “I ﬁgured it would be a good drew the Steel Hurtin’s current MORE story about some creep, or I’d play co-captain, The Kraken, to derby. PHOTOS roller derby,” Booth says. “There are very few areas of ONLINE. at wwwper She went to a tryout at the society were female aggression is a p ty pghci m Romp n’ Roll skating rink in embraced in this way,” she says. .co Glenshaw and fell in love with the And while a battering may sport. The next step was to pick a new leave a player with a few bruises — or persona. Booth decided on Bonecrusher, “derby kisses” — The Kraken says she never which was both the name of her favorite takes personal offense. In fact, she takes a Transformer and her favorite hip-hop artist. big hit as encouragement. Chelly Johnson, a.k.a. Captain Crash, “If someone plays hard against you, participated for four years while a student you’re a threat to them,” she says. “It’s at Chatham University. She is now working a compliment.” on a thesis on roller derby’s effects on its That’s what Johnson sees in derby — players. Johnson says an on-skate alias is a place to be free from all of the cultural crucial for any derby player. stigmas surrounding women. “Superman doesn’t go out as Clark Kent “[Society] is trying to tear down women’s — he puts on a costume,” Johnson says. bodies, but in roller derby, it is about seeing “It lets you be a different person, try out a what it can do,” she says. “This is a sport different persona.” where your body is valuable for what it is.” I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

[THE CHEAP SEATS]

DOWN THE STRETCH {BY MIKE WYSOCKI} ONCE AGAIN, the Pirates are competing

for the National League play-in game. A division title is out of reach since the Cubs are having their best season since the 1908 world championship. They haven’t been this good since only men could vote in a presidential election. But maybe the Pirates can grab one of those ﬁnal spots. Sure, they traded away their team’s record-setting closer and twoﬁfths of the starting rotation, but that’s the Buccos’ version of saying, “We are all in.” Here’s how the Buccos are looking as we go down the stretch.

Out With the Old Hey, Mark Melancon — thanks for breaking the organization’s all-time single-season saves record, now beat it. Tony Watson, Melancon’s understudy, will inherit the role of closer the rest of the way. Mark “The Shark” leaves to replace jerk-of-the-year annual nominee Jonathan Papelbon in Washington, D.C. Bye-bye, Francisco Liriano — four bad months of baseball got him thrown out of the country. He is living in Canada now, joining J.A. Happ in the Blue Jays rotation. Pitcher Jon Niese is gone, too. He was like having another Jeff Locke, only not as dreamy. Niese goes back to the Mets where he came from. Yes, Niese is the guy the Pirates traded Neil Walker to get, but they didn’t get Neil Walker back, they got Antonio Bastardo. Bastardo, who the Pirates let walk in the off-season, is an experienced arm in a bullpen spot that has been a revolving door of not-ready Indy call-ups. Nearly 100 percent of Pirates fans complained about this trade. Can’t blame them; the team did essentially give Neil Walker away for nothing. But we can’t keep living in the past.

{CP PHOTO BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

Pittsburgh Pirates first baseman John Jaso

Ivan Nova comes complete with a good nickname: “SuperNova.” If he struggles, however, he will be called “Beat-up-ChevyNova,” but so far, so good with him. Nova has been exceptional in his first few starts with his new team. He already knows catcher Franciso Cervelli and his fine Italian hospitality. Still seems strange that a tradedeadline deal between the Yankees and the Pirates ends with the Pirates getting the player you actually have heard of. Antonio “Ol Dirty” Bastardo is back, as I mentioned earlier. But the bullpen isn’t the problem, nor is the bench. Matt Joyce and Sean Rodriguez have hit around 25 home runs between them off the bench; David Freese has been great; and John Jaso and Matt Frazier have contributed as well. I feel sorry for any athlete with the last name Frazier. Anytime you fall or duck out of the way of a pitch, some idiot is going to say, “Down goes Frazier.” Joe Frazier was never even knocked out. He only lost four fights (two each to Ali and Foreman); three were TKOs and one a decision. Get knocked down once, and it’s all anyone can remember about you. The mystery of Andrew McCutchen being very un-McCutchen continues. He’s still posting average numbers, but people are actually calling for him to be traded. Blasphemers. Give the guy a break; the Pirates are seeking their fourth straight year in the playoffs. Now granted, teams before 1969 had to win their league to get in the playoffs. Teams before 1993 had to win one of two league divisions to make the postseason. But never in the Pirates history have they been in four straight playoffs. If they do it this year, it will be once again without winning a division title. The Pirates will be competing with the Mets, Cardinals, Marlins, and either the Dodgers or Giants for another shot at the post-season. This is the chance for McCutchen to redeem his season.

NEVER IN THE PIRATES’ HISTORY HAVE THEY BEEN IN FOUR STRAIGHT PLAYOFFS.

In With the New Felipe Rivero, who came over in the Melancon trade, is a ﬁreball-throwing lefty from Venezuela. His salary is 20 times lighter than Melancon’s, but I’m sure that has nothing to do with it. If there are two things everyone wants in their bullpen, its heat and left hands. Rivero has them both, touching high digits on the radar gun. Scouts and coaches are infatuated with players with this kind of arm.

M I K E W YS O C KI IS A STA NDUP CO MED I AN. FO LLO W HI M O N TWI TTER: @IT SMIK E WYSO C K I

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ACROSS 1. 2016 Republican candidate Donald labeled as “low energy” 4. Took care of, as a bill 8. Completely wrecks 14. Hospital ward, for short 15. Strong desire 16. Ark’s landing spot 17. No sharer 18. Sly’s emo boxer? 20. Letters from a Muslim’s deity? 22. Creature that conducts electricity 23. Regard as 24. Furniture wood 25. Military group 27. Gearwheel’s projection 29. Moviefone’s parent co. 30. Rouse Martin known for nailing tenets to a church door? 39. Step between fa and la 40. Provides a room for 41. Before, in poetry 42. “I need help getting this into English”? 45. Consumed 46. No later than 47. Plane part 50. Exotic pet choice

53. 28-Down article 56. Ace’s stat 57. Most uncomfortable place to sleep for overnight guests? 60. Wreck Italy’s capital? 63. Since 1/1: Abbr. 64. Acquire 65. Stops outside of the city 66. General known for chicken dishes 67. Sneaker company with a red triangle logo 68. Barclays Center squad 69. Wedding promise

25. One doing the podcast with you 26. Saison, e.g. 28. See 53-Across 29. Memorouting abbr. 30. Burning residue 31. Feeling of despair 32. Requirement 33. Small carpenter 34. Words With Friends tile: Abbr. 35. Nat. that won the most medals in the 2016 Olympics 36. Supposedly unscripted programming 37. Class where you can work on your figures

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Clicking “reload” makes the workday go faster

38. Born overseas 43. Golden ratio symbol 44. In ___ of 47. Furniture wood 48. Climber’s ridge 49. Prep, as a turkducken 50. “Dayum” 51. Politician Hatch 52. Unified 54. “Au contraire!” 55. Fund, as a chair 57. Policy expert 58. “Heroes in a half shell,” briefly 59. Tell all, with “up” 61. Margin setting 62. 2016 Olympics city

Credit Cards Accepted

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08.31-09.07

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Play a joke on your nervous anxiety. Leap off the ground or whirl in a circle five times as you shout, “I am made of love!” Learn the words and melody to a new song that lifts your mood whenever you sing it. Visualize yourself going on an adventure that will amplify your courage and surprise your heart. Make a bold promise to yourself, and acquire an evocative object that will symbolize your intention to fulfill that promise. Ask yourself a soulshaking question you haven’t been wise enough to investigate before now. Go to a wide-open space, spread your arms out in a greeting to the sky, and pray for a vision of your next big goal.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):

GEMINI (May 21-June 20):

The Illuminati do not want you to receive the prophecy I have prepared for you. Nor do the Overlords of the New World Order, the Church of the SubGenius, the Fake God that masquerades as the Real God, or the nagging little voice in the back of your head. So why am I going ahead and divulging this oracle anyway? Because I love you. My loyalty is to you, not those shadowy powers. Therefore, I am pleased to inform you that the coming weeks will be a favorable time for you to evade, ignore, undermine or rebel against controlling influences that aren’t in alignment with your soul’s goals.

It’s quite possible you will receive seductive proposals in the coming weeks. You may also be invited to join your fortunes with potential collaborators who have almost fully awakened to your charms. I won’t be surprised if you receive requests to share your talents, offer your advice or bestow your largesse. You’re a hot prospect, my dear. You’re an attractive candidate. You appear to be ripe for the plucking. How should you respond? My advice is to be flattered and gratified, but also discerning. Just because an inquiry is exciting doesn’t mean it’s good for you. Choose carefully.

What’s the current status of your relationship with your feet? Have you been cultivating and cherishing your connection with the earth below you? The reason I ask, Gemini, is that right now it’s especially important for you to enjoy intimacy with gravity, roots and foundations. Whatever leads you down and deeper will be a source of good fortune. Feeling grounded will provide you with an aptitude for practical magic. Consider the possibilities of going barefoot, getting a foot massage or buying a new shoes that are both beautiful and comfortable.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):

CANCER (June 21-July 22):

The dictionary says that the verb “to schmooze” means to chat with people in order to promote oneself or make a social connection that may prove to be advantageous. But that definition puts a selfish spin on an activity that can, at least sometimes, be carried out with artful integrity. Your assignment in the coming weeks is to perform this noble version of schmoozing. If you are offering a product or service that is beautiful or useful or both, I hope you will boost its presence and influence with the power of your good listening skills and smart conversations.

Would you like to become a master of intimacy? Can you imagine yourself handling the challenges of togetherness with the skill of a great artist and the wisdom of a love genius? If that prospect appeals to you, now would be a favorable time to up your game. Here’s a hot tip on how to proceed: You must cultivate two seemingly contradictory skills. The first is the capacity to identify and nurture the best qualities in your beloved friend. The second is the ability to thrive on the fact that healthy relationships require you to periodically wrestle with each other’s ignorance and immaturity.

A woman in the final stages of giving birth may experience acute discomfort. But once her infant spills out into the world, her distress can transform into bliss. I don’t foresee quite so dramatic a shift for you, Cancerian. But the transition you undergo could have similar elements: from uncertainty to grace; from agitation to relief; from constriction to spaciousness. To take

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If you are attuned with the cosmic rhythms in the coming weeks, you will be a source of teaching and leadership. Allies will feel fertilized by your creative vigor. You’ll stimulate team spirit with your savvy appeals to group solidarity. If anyone can revive droopy procrastinators and demonstrate the catalytic power of gratitude, it’ll be you. Have you heard enough good news, Sagittarius, or can you absorb more? I expect that you’ll inspire interesting expressions of harmony that will replace contrived versions of togetherness. And every blessing you bestow will expand your capacity for attracting favors you can really use.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The fictional character known as Superman has one prominent vulnerability: the mineral kryptonite. When he’s near this stuff, it weakens his superpowers and may cause other problems. I think we all have our own versions of kryptonite, even if they’re metaphorical. For instance, my own superpowers tend to decline when I come into the presence of bad architecture, cheesy poetry and off-pitch singing. How about you, Capricorn? What’s your version of kryptonite? Whatever it is, I’m happy to let you know that you are currently less susceptible to its debilitating influences than usual. Why? Well, you have a sixth sense about how to avoid it. And even if it does draw near, you have in your repertoire some new tricks to keep it from sapping your strength.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In one of my dreams last night, a Leo sensualist I know advised me to take smart pills and eat an entire chocolate cheesecake before writing my next Leo horoscope. In another dream, my Leo friend Erica suggested that I compose your horoscope while attending an orgy where all the participants were brilliant physicists, musicians and poets. In a third dream, my old teacher Rudolf (also a Leo) said I should create the Leo horoscope as I sunbathed on a beach in Maui while being massaged by two sexy geniuses. Here’s how I interpret my dreams: In the coming days, you can literally increase your intelligence by indulging in luxurious comforts and sensory delights. All of us are trying to wake up from our sleepy delusions about the nature of life. What’s your most potent wake-up technique?

get your yoga on!

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Truth decay is in its early stages. If you take action soon, you can prevent a full-scale decomposition. But be forewarned: Things could get messy, especially if you intervene with the relentless candor and clarity that will be required for medicinal purification. So what do you think? Are you up for the struggle? I understand if you’re not. I’ll forgive you if you simply flee. But if you decide to work your cagey magic, here are some tips. 1. Compile your evidence with rigor. 2. As much as is humanly possible, put aside rancor. Root your efforts in compassionate objectivity. 3. Even as you dig around in the unsightly facts, cherish the beautiful truths you’d like to replace them with.

schoolhouseyoga.com gentle yoga yoga levels 1, 2 ashtanga yoga meditation

yin yoga prenatal yoga mommy & me yoga for kids

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Are you willing to lose at least some of your inhibitions? Are you curious to find out what it feels like to cavort like a wise wild child? If you want to fully cooperate with life’s plans, you will need to consider those courses of action. I am hoping that you’ll accept the dare, of course. I suspect you will thrive as you explore the pleasures of playful audacity and whimsical courage and effervescent experiments. So be blithe, Taurus! Be exuberant! Be open to the hypothesis that opening to jaunty and jovial possibilities is the single most intelligent thing you can do right now.

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700

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maximum advantage of this blessing, don’t hold onto the state you’re leaving behind — or the feelings it aroused in you.

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Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I have been seeing sex workers for 30 years, and I shudder to think how shitty my life would have been without them. Some have become friends, but I’ve appreciated all of them. Negative stereotypes about guys like me are not fair, but sex work does have its problems. Some clients (including females) are difficult — difficult clients aren’t typically violent; more often they’re inconsiderate and demanding. Clients need to understand that all people have limits and feelings, and money doesn’t change that. But what can we clients do to fight stupid, regressive, repressive laws that harm sex workers? NOT A JOHN

You can speak up, NAJ. The current line from prohibitionists — people who want sex work to remain illegal — is that all women who sell sex are victims and all men who buy sex are monsters. But talk to actual sex workers and you hear about considerate, regular clients who are kind, respectful and sometimes personally helpful in unexpected ways. (A sexworker friend had a regular client who was a dentist; he did some expensive dental work for my uninsured friend — and he did it for free, not for trade.) You also hear about clients who are threatening or violent — and how laws against sex work make it impossible for sex workers to go to the police, making them more vulnerable to violence, exploitation and abuse, not less. There is a large and growing sex-workers’ rights movement, NAJ, which Emily Bazelon wrote about in a terrific cover story for the New York Times Magazine (“Should Prostitution Be a Crime?” May 5, 2016). Bazelon spoke with scores of sex workers active in the growing and increasingly effective decriminalization movement. Amnesty International recently called for the full decriminalization of sex work, joining Human Rights Watch, the World Health Organization, and other large, mainstream health and humanrights groups. But there’s something missing from the movement to decriminalize sex work: clients like you, NAJ. Maggie McNeill, a sex worker, activist and writer, wrote a blistering piece on her blog (“The Honest Courtesan”) about a recent undercover police operation in Seattle. Scores of men seeking to hire sex workers — the men ranged from surgeons to bus drivers to journalists — were arrested and subjected to ritualized public humiliation designed to discourage other men from paying for sex. “These crusades do nothing but hurt the most vulnerable individuals on both sides of the transaction,” McNeill wrote. “The only way to stop this [is for] all of you clients out there get off of your duffs and fight. Regular clients outnumber full-time whores by at least 60 to 1; gentlemen, I suggest you rethink your current silence, unless you want to be the next one with your name and picture splashed across newspapers, TV screens and websites.” The much-touted “Nordic Model” is upping the legal stakes for buyers of sex. (The Nordic Model makes buying sex illegal, not selling it. In theory, only clients are supposed to suffer, but in practice, the women are punished, too. Bazelon unpacks the harms of the Nordic Model in her story.) But sex workers today, like gays and lesbians not too long ago, are coming out in ever-greater numbers to fight for their rights in the face of potentially dire legal and social consequences.

Clients need to join the fight — or perhaps I should say clients need to rejoin the fight. In The Origins of Sex: A History of the First Sexual Revolution, author Faramerz Dabhoiwala writes about “Societies of Virtue” formed all over England in the late 17th century. Adulterers, fornicators and Sabbath-breakers were persecuted by these groups, NAJ, but their campaigns against prostitutes were particularly vicious and indiscriminate; women were thrown in jail or publicly whipped for the crime of having a “lewd” appearance. The persecution of streetwalkers, brothel owners and women guilty of “[walking] quietly about the street” went on for decades. Then a beautiful thing happened. “In the spring of 1711, a drive against ‘loose women and their male followers’ in Covent Garden was foiled when ‘the constables were dreadfully maimed, and one mortally wounded, by ruffians aided by 40 soldiers of the guards, who entered into a combination to protect the women,’” writes Dabhoiwala. “On another occasion in the East End, a crowd of over a thousand seamen mobbed the local magistrates and forcibly released a group of convicted prostitutes being sent to a house of correction.” And thanks to their efforts and the efforts of 18th-century sex workers who lawyered up, marched into court and sued the pants off Society of Virtue members, by the middle of the 18th century, women could walk the streets without being arrested or harassed — even women known to be prostitutes. I’m not suggesting that today’s clients form mobs and attack prohibitionists, cops, prosecutors and their enablers in the media. But clients can and should be out there speaking up in defense of sex workers and themselves. I’m a 26-year-old gay male, and I like to explore my feminine side by wearing female clothes. I have a boyfriend who likes to do the same thing, but he doesn’t have the courage to tell his parents that he’s gay and explores his feminine side by wearing female clothes. I want to adopt earlyschool-age boys and teach them that they can explore their feminine side by wearing female clothes. My question has two parts. First, in regard to my boyfriend, how can I encourage him to tell his parents he’s gay and wants to explore his feminine side by wearing female clothes? Second, in regard to adopting early-school-age boys, how do I teach an early-school-age boy that it’s OK for them to explore their feminine side by wearing female clothes and also teach them that they don’t have to be gay at the same time? DRESSING A FUTURE TOGETHER

Wear whatever you like, DAFT, but please don’t adopt any children — boys or otherwise, earlyschool-age or newborn, not now, probably not ever. Because a father who pushes his son into a dress is just as abusive and unfit as one who forbids his son to wear a dress. You two don’t need kids, DAFT, you need a therapist who can help your boyfriend with his issues (the closet, not wearing female clothes) and help you with yours (your extremely odd and potentially damaging ideas about parenting, not wearing female clothes). Savage Lovecast live in Chicago! Listen at savagelovecast.com.

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT SAVAGELOVECAST.COM

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 08.31/09.07.2016

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