Dec. 27, 2017 - Pittsburgh City Paper

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WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM | 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

EVENTS Every Friday in January FREE GOOD FRIDAYS PRESENTED BY UPMC HEALTH PLAN Each Friday in January, enjoy free museum admission, special guest DJs, Gusto & Naeem and a cash bar.

Free Good Fridays are presented by UPMC Health Plan.

1.5 – 7pm ART IN CONTEXT: BORDER CROSSINGS The Warhol theater Artists, scholars, and community members come together to consider creative expression in relation to timely political and social concerns.

Free; Registration suggested

TWO CULTURES. ONE ARTIST. HOW WILL YOU INTERPRET IT?

1.11 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: BEYOND: CONCERT 1 FEATURING THE BEYOND FESTIVAL ORCHESTRA Carnegie Music Hall (Oakland) Co-presented by the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music Tickets $15/$10 students and seniors in advance, $20/$15 students and seniors at the door

TWO CULTURES. ONE ARTIST. HOW WILL YOU INTERPRET IT?

1.12 – 7:30pm SOUND SERIES: BEYOND: CONCERT 2 FEATURING LOADBANG The Warhol theater Co-presented by the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music Tickets $15/$10 students and seniors in advance, $20/$15 students and seniors at the door

1.13 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: BEYOND: FINAL CONCERT FEATURING DAVID KRAKAUER AND ANCESTRAL GROOVE The Warhol entrance space Co-presented by the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music Tickets $15/$10 students and seniors in advance, $20/$15 students and seniors at the door

Farhad Moshiri, Yipeeee, 2009, Private Collection, London, photo by Guillaume Ziccarelli

THROUGH JANUARY 14, 2018 ONLY AT THE WARHOL Farhad Moshiri: Go West is generously supported by The Fine Foundation, Piaget, Galerie Perrotin, Galerie Thaddaeus Ropac, The Third Line, Dubai, The Soudavar Memorial Foundation, The Farjam Foundation, The Khazaei Foundation, Maryam and Edward Eisler, Navid Mirtorabi, Ziba Franks, Elie Khouri, Fatima and Essi Maleki, Nazee Moinian, Mahshid and Jamshid Ehsani, and Narmina and Javad Marandi.

The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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t c e f r e p e h t k Pic . s s a p y t i r o h t u A Port

What pass is best for you?

In for the long run. Annual Pass- Best value if you ride frequently all year long. Price includes a full year of unlimited rides. Pay for the first 11 months– the 12th month is free. Cost: $1,072.50

Take 10. Ten-Trip Pass*- So, you plan to ride but don’t know exactly when. No problem. The ten-trip pass gives you the flexibility to use according to your unpredictable schedule. Cost: $25.00

Everyday commuter? Monthly Pass- The next best option, if you prefer to pay each month instead.

Receive unlimited rides, just not the free month.

Valid for a calendar month beginning with the first day and ending on the last. Well worth it if you intend to ride at least 20 days per month. Cost: $97.50

Forget Cash. Stored Cash Value- Provides the same flexibility as a ten-trip pass and will save you from paying an extra $.25 if you use cash.

Stored cash value is required in order to purchase a $1 electronic transfer. Cost: Load any value up to $200

Taking it one week at a time. Weekly PassA good short-term option if you plan to ride often throughout a specific week. Receive unlimited rides for a calendar week Sunday through Saturday. Cost: $25.00

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

One day at a time. Single Trip Pass/Single Trip Pass with Transfer- A great option for occasional riders and visitors. Perfect if you just need a one-way ride to or from an event or want to see Downtown Pittsburgh at night from the Monongahela Incline. Cost: $2.50/$3.50

Taking it day by day. Day Pass*- Your best option for unlimited rides for one service day.

The pass is valid from first tap on a farebox to the end of Port Authority service that same day.

Cost: $7.00 Passes are available on a Connectix, the paper version of an electronic smart card, and can be purchased at any ConnectCard Vending Machine.

12.27.2017/01.03.2018

VOLUME 27 + ISSUE 52

LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO DRIVE A BORING CAR

[EDITORIAL] Editor CHARLIE DEITCH News Editor REBECCA ADDISON Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Associate Editor AL HOFF Digital Editor ALEX GORDON Staff Writers RYAN DETO, CELINE ROBERTS Music Writer MEG FAIR Interns JAKE MYSLIWCZYK, AMANDA REED

2018 ALFA ROMEO STELVIO

[ART] Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI

[NEWS]

Pittsburgh is full of big news every year. We take a look at the stories that went viral, thanks to social media. Also check out our year in review in music, arts and sports.

[ADVERTISING]

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Associate Publisher JUSTIN MATASE Advertising Representatives MACKENNA DONAHUE, ANDREA JAMES, PAUL KLATZKIN, BLAKE LEWIS, JENNIFER MAZZA National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

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Marketing Director LINDSEY THOMPSON Marketing and Sales Assistant CONNOR MARSHMAN

“Actually, I’ve found that when somebody claims they’re not racist by claiming to have black friends, they’re racist.”

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News 06 Views 14 Weird 16 Music 18 Arts 26 Events 30 Taste 33

Screen 37 Sports 39 Classifieds 42 Crossword 43 Astrology 44 Savage Love 45 The Last Word 46 NEWS

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THIS WEEK

ONLINE

A LOOK AT THE TOP LOCAL TWEETS OF 2017

www.pghcitypaper.com

2017 IN TWEETS

Last week, the Trans-Siberian Orchestra made its annual stop in Pittsburgh at PPG Paints Arena.

Check out our photos from the show at www.pghcitypaper.com.

Some of Pittsburgh’s biggest stories were documented in tweets; other tweets were the story {BY REBECCA ADDISON}

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HIS YEAR, social-media site Twitter announced plans to expand its 140-character limit. The decision is

controversial and has been vociferously debated. But whether people will be able to communicate with 140 characters or with more, there’s no denying that Twitter has become integral to discussions about news. The social-media site is our president’s medium of choice, after all. Some of Pittsburgh’s biggest stories in 2017 were well documented on the site. And, in other cases, the tweets themselves became the story.

Here’s a look at the top local tweets of 2017.

Struggling to stay afloat in the constantly swirling sea of political news?

Check out City Paper’s Politicrap blog to read about the most important races and issues in our region.

CP recently reported on a racist video as part of our work with ProPublica’s Documenting Hate project aimed at collecting reports of hate crimes and bias incidents. If you’ve been a victim or a witness, tell us your story at www.pghcitypaper.com.

CITY PAPER

Black Forge Coffee @BlackForgePGH The new customer-loyalty punch cards have arrived! Buy a drink, take out a scumbag & be that much closer to a free coffee. @realDonaldTrump

INTERACTIVE

IN MAY, Pittsburgh restaurateurs caught flack after they announced plans to open a hip-hop-themed fried-chicken restaurant. The backlash spurred a larger conversation about cultural appropriation in the city. huny young @huny A restauranteur here in Pittsburgh plans to open a “90s hip-hop themed fried chicken restaurant called ‘the Coop.”

Our featured photo from last week is by @lovelytravelsblog. Use #CPReaderArt to share your local photos with us for your chance to be featured next!

Want to get the freshest content sent right to your inbox? Sign up for our newsletters at pghcitypaper.com/newsletters.

IN MARCH, Black Forge Coffee House, in Allentown, released new customer-loyalty punch cards adorned with the faces of 10 notable politicians and pundits, including the president. Outrage ensued.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

NEW YEAR New best friend!

JANUARY 2nd - 7th Cats 1 year & older

$20.18 + tax

Humane Animal Rescue North Side

East End

6926 Hamilton Avenue 1101 Western Avenue Pittsburgh, PA 15233 Pittsburgh, PA 15208

412.345.7300 www.humaneanimalrescue.org NEWS

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Standard adoption policies apply.

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2017 IN TWEETS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 06

IN JUNE, Donald Trump announced the United States would be withdrawing from the Paris Agreement, which seeks to mitigate greenhouse-gas emissions. In a tweet explaining the decision, Trump evoked Pittsburgh’s name.

Pittsburgh Mayor Bill Peduto was not amused.

FIVE YEARS AFTER he was paralyzed by a Pittsburgh police officer, Leon Ford posted a video of himself walking with the assistance of a walker while his son cheered him on.

Leon Ford @LeonFordSpeaks When you get shot by a police officer 5 times--and docs say that you will ever walk but your son says keep pushing Untold 11•11•17

bill peduto @billpeduto As the Mayor of Pittsburgh, I can assure you that we will follow the guidelines of the Paris Agreement for our people, our economy & future.

IN OCTOBER, U.S. Rep. Tim Murphy (R-Upper St. Clair) resigned after news broke that he had urged his mistress to have an abortion, despite being vocally pro-life throughout his career. In a monumental display of hypocrisy, the very same day the news broke, Murphy voted to restrict abortion access.

Serenity @serenityatsea Good tweet. Another so called “Man of God” who recently had to resign was Tim Murphy. A married pro-lifer who told his GF to get an abortion when she thought she was pregnant.

CONTINUES ON PG. 10

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2017 IN TWEETS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 08

JuJu Smith-Schuster @TeamJuJu MY BIKE GOT STOLEN WHY PEOPLE GOT TO BE LIKE THAT??

PITTSBURGH STEELERS wide receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster is an avid cyclist, but in October his bike was stolen.

Thankfully, it was returned in record time — the very night the tweet was posted.

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JENSORENSEN

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

Special Extended Winter Break Hours December 26-30 9:30 am-9:30 pm

Christmas Eve & New Year’s Eve: 9:30 am-4:30 pm New Year’s Day: Noon-9:30 pm

Season Passes Now Available!

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We Know Snow

alleghenycounty.us/winterfun NEWS

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2017 IN TWEETS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 10

WHILE THERE’S still a lot of mystery surrounding Pittsburgh’s bid to be selected as the new location of one of Amazon’s headquarters, that hasn’t stopped everyone from speculating and making light of the competition.

ClickHole @ClickHole Jeff Bezos Just Tossed A Nail-Studded Baseball Bat On The Floor Between The Mayors Of Pittsburgh And Kansas City And Asked Who Really Wants The Second Amazon HQ clckhl.co/IeYOAMg

CONTINUES ON PG. 14

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

When holiday plans don’t go as planned.

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Visit UPMC.com/Holidays or call 1-800-533-UPMC (8762) for more information.

Affiliated with the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine, UPMC Presbyterian Shadyside is ranked among America’s Best Hospitals by U.S. News & World Report.

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2017 IN TWEETS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 12

IN NOVEMBER, political news site Politico published a story painting nearby Johnstown as a no-hope town, overrun by drugs and blight, and still in love with Trump. Many thought the characterization was unfair.

Beth Skwarecki @BethSkw

PartsUnknown @PartsUnknownCNN Been to Pittsburgh? What would you say are the classic Pittsburgher qualities? @bourdain feels right at home on @CNNOriginals #PartsUnknown.

Johnstown, PA, home of Trump voter caricatures, went to Clinton. Meanwhile Cranberry, full of wealthy white folks, was Trump by a landslide. Can we report stories from the right places please?

STATE REP. Daryl Metcalfe (R-Cranberry), raging homophobe and all-around jerk, became angry during a state-government committee meeting when a male colleague touched his arm. “I’m a heterosexual,” he said, before going into a tirade that emphasized how much he loves his wife.

Pittsburgh Post-Gazette @PittsburghPG State Rep. Darryl Metcalfe comes out as heterosexual

If you shared that @politico piece last week, share this now.

ANTHONY BOURDAIN visited Pittsburgh this year for his show Parts Unknown. The episode depicted the city as a place grappling with issues like diversity and how to move forward after de-industrialization. The episode angered many who felt it didn’t jibe with the shiny new image the city has been promoting.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

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$99

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News of the Weird

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A Tesla showroom in South Salt Lake, Utah, was the nexus of four different arrests on Nov. 24, according to the Salt Lake Tribune, in which at least two of the suspects claimed to be part of the Tesla “family.” (The car company is named after inventor Nikola Tesla, not a family owner.) In the first arrest, a Tesla pulled up behind a Utah Highway Patrol car at a stoplight, and the officer noticed that Driver No. 1 was acting “suspicious.” When the officer pulled him over, the 24-year-old driver said a man he hardly knew gave him the car and keys to three other Teslas. When the officer and driver returned to the showroom, it had been burglarized, but Driver No. 1 explained that the burglary had occurred before he got to the dealership, so he felt he was allowed to take the vehicle and keys. Area officers were alerted, and 31-year-old Driver No. 2 led troopers on a short chase, until his Tesla’s battery died. Later, Driver No. 3, 19, was pulled over in West Valley, and finally Driver No. 4, a 27-year-old woman, was stopped at a liquor store and told police a man named Tesla had given her the car. “We are still trying to sort this out,” said South Salt Lake Police spokesman Gary Keller. “We actually have two people claiming their name is Tesla and a family member died and left them these cars.

It’s one of those cases where you just have to scratch your head and say, ‘Really?’”

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Popeye’s preferred diet of spinach to pump up his biceps had to be healthier than what a Russian man has been injecting.

Kirill Tereshin, 21, from Pyatigorsk in southwestern Russia, concocts a dangerous muscleenhancing solution of olive oil, lidocaine and benzyl alcohol, and injects it into his arm muscles, resulting in “bazooka” arms that doctors say may become paralyzed or even have to be amputated. Tereshin has so far used 6 liters of the fluid, and his biceps measure 23 inches, but he plans to continue injecting until they reach 27 inches. “I would like to get more than 1 million subscribers on Instagram and to stop working,” Tereshin told the Daily Mail.

He’s considering an offer to become a porn star. “I love to be recognizable,” he said.

Thanks for sharing, @legopgh and @mikekutilek!

Tag your photos of Pittsburgh with #CPReaderArt on Instagram for your chance to be featured next!

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It was all fun and games until a drunk, naked man and his (also naked) companion crashed into a tree near La Grande, Wash., on Nov. 22. Washington State Patrol spokeswoman Brooke Bova told The Olympian that the couple were engaging in intercourse when the driver missed a curve and left the highway. The woman was hospitalized with broken bones, but her 3-month-old child was unhurt in the backseat. The driver, who has three prior DUI convictions, was charged with felony driving under the influence, vehicular assault and endangering a child.

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Male residents of Ringaskiddy in Ireland have at least one compelling reason to set down roots there: According to local lore, the nearby Pfizer plant, where Viagra

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

is produced, emits “love fumes” that give men free erections. “One whiff and you’re stiff,” bartender Debbie O’Grady told The Times of London. Pfizer, however, disputes the tales, with a spokesperson saying: “Our manufacturing processes have always been highly sophisticated as well as highly regulated.” Still, locals speak of a baby boom after the plant opened in 1998, and men apparently regularly gather near the facility to inhale the fumes.

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Dovey the Shar Pei, of Edmond, Okla., might be just a bit jealous of the new baby at his owners’ home. But in a classic passive-aggressive move, he settled on stealing pacifiers. Scott Rogers and his wife noticed that binkies were disappearing, but it wasn’t until Dovey started vomiting and losing weight in early December that they tracked down the lost items. KFOR-TV reports that Dr. Chris Rispoli, of Gentle Care Animal Hospital, took an X-ray of Dovey’s stomach

and saw what he thought were seven to nine pacifiers. But when Rispoli opened up Dovey to remove them, he found 21 binkies. Turns out, Dovey was taking the pacifiers off the kitchen counter. “We’ve had corn cobs and socks and panties and things like that, but never 21 binkies,” noted Rispoli.

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Claudell Curry, 82, and his wife, Odell Marie, 83, heard a loud crashing noise as they watched TV in their San Bernardino, Calif., home on the evening of Dec. 10. Imagine their surprise when it was NOT Santa Claus, but instead a block of ice the size of a car engine, which had torn through their roof and landed on their bed. Federal Aviation Administration spokesman Ian Gregor said about a similar incident in November that the ice might have dropped off a passenger airliner, having formed after a leak in the galley. Neither of the Currys was hurt, but “We shiver every time we think we could have been in bed,” Claudell told The San Bernardino Sun.

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LISTEN AS YOU READ: SCAN THE CODE FOR OUR NEW SPOTIFY PLAYLIST, A SOUNDTRACK TO THE STORIES IN THIS SECTION, OR VISIT WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM/BLOGS/FFW/

NEW LOCAL RELEASES {BY MEG FAIR}

Paul Luc BAD SEED SELF-RELEASED WWW.PAULLUC.COM

On Bad Seed, Paul Luc seeks to recreate the magic of early rock and country records by working with strangers in a Nashville studio. The result is a record that boasts a live sound rather than a hyperproduced album. This serves Luc well, giving his music a distinctive energy. The music comes across as organic and comfortable, despite being made by a group of strangers.

Luc’s voice is crystal clear and he articulates well, so if country with a strong twang isn’t your thing, Bad Seed is a great choice.

My personal favorite on the record is the title track. “Bad Seed” treats melancholy guitar and organ piano with care, despite being surrounded by galloping drums. “I was the minor chord in her mostly joyful song, I diminished every key,” sings Luc. “Born a bad seed.”

It’s a tune that drips with longing.

In spite of it being an album rooted in collaboration, Bad Seed’s closer, “Where All The Time Goes,” pulls the focus closer to just Luc, as he sings a nostalgic song over finger-picked guitar.

It lets the story do the speaking, even as the very subtle organ hums.

FOR FANS OF: COUNTRY WITH CROSSOVER APPEAL, ADAM PASCAL

Nightly Standard ADAPT SELF-RELEASED NIGHTLYSTANDARDPGH.BANDCAMP.COM

Nightly Standard is a seven-piece fusion band that weaves together rock, jazz and soul. That can mean a lot of moving parts, but the band manages to lock into grooves and focus enough not to step on its own toes.

Adapt, a four-song EP, is driven heavily by harmonies and rock-solid drums. The band does high energy well, as on the opener, “Hold Them Above,” and its closer, “Our Days,” a track that feels like a less theatrical version of some of the horn-heavy songs on No Doubt’s Tragic Kingdom. The band also flexes its laid-back capabilities with the island-y track “Hawaii” and the reggae-tinged heartbreak tune “Fraying Rope.”

FOR FANS OF: GOOD HARMONIES, HORN SECTIONS, TASTEFUL GUITAR SOLOS

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TOP ALBUMS OF 2017 This year felt like a really long one. A long, horrible shitty one, most of the time. But despite all the flaming dumpster fires, some really great albums got us through. Let some local musicians and promoters share their favorite local and national releases for the year.

Meg Fair, CP Music Writer Paramore — After Laughter I don’t give a shit what any of the haters say.

This album was a brilliant pop record that made you dance, while lyrically tackling some really difficult matters. It’s amazing to see sadness and mental illness so tenderly embraced on a record that sounds like a journey toward healing, but in the least cheesy way possible. “Fake Happy” may be one of my all-time favorite songs at this point.

Charly Bliss — Guppy I’ve listened to this album an insane number of times. Charly Bliss has managed to package all my favorite things about pop music and rock into a brilliant set of songs that I never tire of. From a love song to vocalist Eva Hendricks’ therapist (“Ruby”) to heavy bangers like “Julia” and poppy jaunts like “Scare U,” CB can really do it all.

Princess Nokia — 1992 Deluxe This re-released and expanded version of

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

Princess Nokia’s 2016 mixtape is an absolute masterpiece. Princess Nokia can pull off such a wide range of material, from trappier tracks like “Katana” to laid-back, vintage hip-hop tracks like “Saggy Denim.”

Also, if you don’t go off to “Tomboy,” you’re just absolutely wrong.

Distant Futures — Were Bjordan — PETTY HIT MACHINE Side Eye — La Vague Hearken — Carte Blanche Looming — Seed CHOIR — YOU DO IT TO YOURSELF

St. Vincent — MASSEDUCTION MASSEDUCTION was promoted and packaged like a pop album, with strong visuals and a more character-esque presentation of Annie Clark. But when you remove the bow and the wrapping paper, underneath is a record that is supremely vulnerable, raw and honest. It’s the closest we’ve ever gotten to Clark, while still maintaining a delightfully catchy and danceable pop vibe.

Brett Shumakeri,

Code Orange — Forever This album is gut-wrenchingly hard, balancing itself between vicious metal and ballsy hardcore, all while playing with electronics in a way that very few artists are bold enough to do. There’s a reason this band scored a Grammy nomination — it’s doing the shit everyone else is too scared to do.

OTHER LOCAL FAVORITES: Honey — Mock Pop Calyx — For To, Oh

promoter at Don’t Let the Scene Go Down on Me Charly Bliss — Guppy Sugary-sweet pop songs that I just could not stop listening to this year. One of those bands you can just tell they have so much fun, and it comes out in their music. One of my most-anticipated records this year, and it did not disappoint.

Cende — #1 Hit Single A band that formed over its love of The Marked Men and that influence shows in its songs. This record is full of lush melodies, and there’s even an appearance from Greta Kline of Frankie Cosmos.

Open City — Open City The punkest record of 2017. Hits hard right from the beginning and never stops. Members of Paint It Black, Lifetime, Ceremony, and Bridge and Tunnel form this Philly supergroup.

• The Homeless Gospel Choir — Presents: Normal • Roy Orbison & The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra — A Love So Beautiful • Code Orange — Forever

Sincere Engineer — Rhombithian A release that came out of nowhere for me.

Perfect blend of Midwest punk and Midwest emo. Lots of energy. Lots of emotion. An excellent debut.

Harrison Thurman,

Priests — Nothing Feels Natural Gothy post-punk jams. Saw them live this past summer and immediately spent all my money at the merch table. “My best friend says, ‘I want to start a band called Burger King,” and I say, ‘Do it! Make your dreams a reality,” is the best lyric of the year.

SOME OF MY FAVORITE LOCAL RELEASES: • The Homeless Gospel Choir — Presents: Normal • Lawn Care — Replacement Therapy • Short Fictions — The Heart Is a Kaleidoscope • Nightmarathons — Nightmarathons • Calyx — For To, Oh

Caitlin, of Calyx, Maenads • Pile — A Hairshirt of Purpose • Bad Moves — Bad Moves (Dec. 2016, but c’mon) • Nnamdi Ogbonnaya — Drool • Medium Ugly — Punk-oramademodingdong • Leikeli47 — Wash & Set • Vince Staples — Big Fish Theory • Looming — Seed • Bully — Losing • Shitkid — Fish • Hop Along — Get Disowned (I’m sorry, it might always make my year-end lists)

Jesse and Steph, of The Lopez • Lana Del Rey — Lust For Life • Joey Bada$$ — All-Amerikkkan Bada$$ • Studio One — The #1 Sound From the Vaults — Vol. 1 • Beck — Colors • St. Vincent — MASSEDUCTION • Taylor Swift — Reputation • Kesha — Rainbow • Moses Sumney — Aromanticism • R.Ring — Ignite the Rest • Kelela — Take Me Apart

MOMENTS AND THINGS

of Lawn Care, AllegrA • The Homeless Gospel Choir —Presents: Normal • Looming — Seed • Short Fictions — The Heart Is a Kaleidoscope SOFT GIRL — Soft Girl.

• Distant Futures — Were • IT IT — Formal Odors • Jack Stauber — Pop Food • Wreck Loose — OK, Wreck Loose • Hearken — Carte Blanche • Flower Crown — GLOW • Calyx — For To, Oh • Skull Kid — Protection Charm

{PHOTO COURTESY OF WWW.WWE.COM}

Code Orange at NXT Takeover

When you think of year-end lists, typically shows and albums come to mind. But there can be all sorts of cool moments and movements that make a year special in a music community.

Josh Bakaitus, of Mr. Smalls Presents

I’m also VERY excited for the BBGuns album next year. The tracks the band has released are **three fire emojis**.

IAN BRILL’S VAULT AT SPIRIT HALL I absolutely loved seeing shows in Ian Brill’s Vault at Spirit Hall during the Halloween season. Waxahatchee and AJJ were both unique and awesome in that environment!

Michael Schang,

Meg Fair, CP Music Writer CODE ORANGE AT NXT TAKEOVER Don’t get me wrong — a Grammy nomination is a big deal, but no moment made me prouder of Pittsburgh HXC than seeing Code Orange as the first live band to perform on a WWE event. The members of Code Orange not only brought the house down kicking off the show with “Bleeding in the Blur,” but also crushed a live version of Aleister Black’s entrance music. It was insane to see the creative energies of a Pittsburgh band on such an international platform. Then. Now. (Code Orange) Forever.

concert promoter • Arca — Arca • Street Sects — Rat Jacket • Primitive Man — Caustic • Good Time soundtrack • Planning For Burial — Below the House • Paramore — After Laughter • Queens Of The Stone Age — Villains • Kendrick Lamar — DAMN. • Portrayal Of Guilt — Portrayal of Guilt • John Mayer — The Search For Everything

Liss Victory, singer/songwriter PITTSBURGH SONGWRITERS RESPOND: GOOD TUNES FOR BAD POLITICAL TIMES Immediately after the 2016 election, Pittsburgh-based songwriter Don Strange rallied some of the city’s best musicians to create a compilation of politically charged original music to benefit the ACLU. Recorded, organized and designed

by Strange, Pittsburgh Songwriters Respond: Good Tunes for Bad Political Times captures a moment unlike any other in our country, as interpreted by local singers and songwriters. Listen at pghsongwriters.bandcamp.com.

LOCAL • Concealed Blade — Concealed Blade • Lady Beast — Vicious Breed • Maenads — Maenads • Ritual Mass (demo) • Legendry — Dungeon Crawler

Holden Grimes,

Josh Bakaitus,

of Werefolk

promoter at Mr. Smalls Presents • Charly Bliss — Guppy • Anti-Flag — American Fall • Waxahatchee — Out in the Storm • Priests — Nothing Feels Natural • Jimmy Eat World — Integrity Blues (2016) • Kate Tempest — Let Them Eat Chaos (2016) • American Football — LP2 (2016)

TOP LOCAL ALBUMS • we hold hands and we jump — we hold hands and we jump • fig — oral fixation • Lawn Care — Replacement Therapy • Distant Futures — Were • The Homeless Gospel Choir — Presents: Normal

Dhruva Krishna, concert promoter and musician A FAREWELL TO JAMES STREET [My favorite moment was] the bittersweet one when everyone came together for the last week of James Street, for a final show of support and appreciation for our amazing staff!

MEGFAIR@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

MEGFAIR@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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BELVEDERES

FAVORITE CONCERTS OF 2017 WHETHER IT’S witnessing your favorite

ULTRA-DIVE THURS 28

SNOW BALL 84’ LAST 80S NIGHT EVER

artist for the first time, discovering a new band whose live show melts your brain or falling in love with a perfect moment in musical time, seeing live music can be an absolutely life-changing experience. Below, City Paper contributors and a few local musicians and promoters discuss some of this year’s favorite concerts.

Charlie Deitch, CP editor

FRI 29

POKEY LAFARGE, WITH THE HACKENSAW BOYS, AT THE REX THEATER

SAT 30

Simply referring to St. Louis’ Pokey LaFarge as a roots artist is underselling what he actually does on stage. His hard-charging music is a mix of big band, blues and Western swing. He draws hundreds of fans every time he hits town. This time, however, I wasn’t quite sure what to expect after seeing a tweet from Pokey, sent about three hours before show time, saying that he contracted food poisoning the night before in that shithole Cleveland and he wasn’t sure he could perform. The starting time was pushed a bit, but the show got off to a fast start with Charlottesville, Va.’s Hackensaw Boys. In my review of the show, I wrote that the band was a “three-piece featuring a lead guitar, fiddle and a dude who rocks the shit out of a home-

DOWN AND DERBY POP ROCKS Y2K W DJS KILLJOY + NICEREC

SUN 31

NYE 2018 • JOUST CLUB

DANCE, BUNGEE, JOUST, WHATEVER

MON YOGA 8PM TUES KARAOKE 10PM 4016 BUTLER STREET PITTSBURGH, PA 15201 412-687-2555 WWW.BELVEDERESULTRADIVE.COM

{CP PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Pokey LaFarge at the Rex Theater

made percussion kit made up of tin cans and a garbage-can lid.” LaFarge hit the stage looking like a man who was about to throw up every few minutes. But once he launched into his hit, “Something in the Water,” the show hit a high energy level that he sustained throughout the entire show, even though he took occasional breaks to puke in a trash can offstage. If the show was any indication what an under-theweather Pokey LaFarge can do, you definitely don’t want to miss him when he comes back around at full strength. It will likely be epic.

Eli Enis, CP contributor T-REXTASY AND MANNEQUIN PUSSY, AT THE MR. ROBOTO PROJECT

• PENS SPECIAL : $2.00 COORS LIGHT PINTS DURING ALL THE GAMES & A PENS TICKET GIVEAWAY EVERY MONTH. • SMOKING AND NON SMOKING SECTION. • 40 CENT WINGS ON WEDNESDAY 5-11 AND SATURDAY 11AM TO 6PM. • $8.99 LARGE WOOD FIRED PIZZAS EVERY THURSDAY. • VISIT US ON THE WEB OR LIKE US ON FACEBOOK FOR A FULL LIST OF SPECIALS!

HOP HOUSE ROSS TOWNSHIP 5510 BABCOCK BLVD. • PITTSBURGH, PA 15237

Philly’s Mannequin Pussy and Brooklyn’s T-Rextasy are each used to being the most animated and energetic band on the bill. So, it made for a particularly intense pairing when they played Mr. Roboto together over the summer. Instead of stepping over each other, though, they were unbelievably complementary.

T-Rextasy was a pure joy to witness, as each member shamelessly thrashed about stage, chimed in for quadruple-threat harmonies, and smiled in ways that convinced me they were having the absolute time of their lives. Frontwoman Lyris Faron’s theatrical command of the stage was both entertaining and empowering, particularly when she asked her bandmates to unleash their ever-clever comedic diatribes during the end of “Gap Yr Boiz.”

Mannequin Pussy is a different type of intense. Watching frontwoman Marisa Dabice maintain her composure while she shrieked, howled and crooned through some of the most chaotically cleansing material I’ve ever heard — while her bandmates cranked along with the utmost precision — made for one of the most amazing performances I’ve ever witnessed. The band somehow managed to play its songs both faster and tighter than on recordings, without losing their signature air of messy catharsis.

Mannequin Pussy is quite honestly the only band that could successfully follow up T-Rextasy, and T-Rextasy is the only band that could possibly precede Mannequin Pussy without being blown out of the water. The two should ... uh ... tour?

Holden Grimes, of Werefolk PUNK TALKS BENEFIT SHOW, WITH SODA CLUB, SHORT FICTIONS, WILLIAM FORREST, RCHRD PRKR Punk Talks is such an important group, encouraging musicians to get mental-health help, if needed, and even providing therapy for touring musicians. This show was just what I needed to remind myself: “You don’t need to be sad to make great music.”

Liss Victory, singer/songwriter DORI CAMERON’S EP-RELEASE SHOW Dori Cameron’s release show for her debut EP highlights my 2017. I watched Dori progress from a woman searching for her first guitar on Craigslist and learning her first chords, to a full-fledged songwriter with her own show at the Mr. Smalls Funhouse. Nowadays, she performs in multiple countries with her vivacious vocals and heartfelt rhythms. There’s no moment this year that can stack up to watching a fellow female musician realize their dreams on one of the premier stages of our city.

Harrison Thurman, of Lawn Care, AllegrA A-F FEST (SECOND NIGHT), AT ROBOTO A-F Fest at Roboto, including seeing Anti-Flag for the first time in probably a decade. They were my favorite band for much of middle school and high school, and it’s awesome to me that they’re still making great heart-onsleeve political music. Seeing a sold-out crowd singing “Fuck Police Brutality” was surreal, and it felt like a time warp. At this set, Justin Sane revealed that “Your Daddy Was a Rich Man,” which was written for the band’s first album and released in 1996, was about Donald Trump. Also, it was so validating to have a band of that caliber, a world-class talent, play at Roboto again. For the last several years, Roboto has been in danger of shutting down, and this was a reminder that the work that the other volunteers and I put into the space is actually worth it!

MEGFAIR@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

CRITICS’ PICKS

Get the gift you really Wanted!

The Commonheart

[EMO/PUNK] + THU., DEC. 28 Growing restless during your winter-break relaxation? Looking to shake the dust off and over-caffeinate in the presence of two indie-tinged emo bands? One option is to head up to Allentown to catch Colourshow and New Design who will be performing a Christmas Special at Black Forge Coffee. This gig is for folks who are fans of The Swellers, good harmonies, Explosions in the Sky and crowd singalongs. Meg Fair 6:30 p.m.

1206 Arlington Ave., Allentown. $10-12. All ages.

412-291-8994

[TRIBUTE] + FRI., DEC. 29

CHOIR

Celebrate the life and expansive catalogue of Tom Petty tonight at Mr. Smalls, with Pittsburgh Plays Petty: Tribute to the Music & Life of Tom Petty.

It’s not just fun alliteration: The stage will be crowded with some of our city’s most prominent rock and pop people. There’s Cassie Staub, of Looming and Secret House Sessions; Steve Soboslai, Chris Fafalios and Cory Muro, of Punchline; singer-songwriter Angela Autumn; Jordan Tomb, of Red Hands and emo night; and pianist and vocalist Heather Kropf.

It’s hosted by some guy named Bill Peduto.

Go see it for yourself. Alex Gordon 7 p.m.

400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $15-20. All ages. www.mrsmalls.com

[INDIE ROCK + POP] + SAT., DEC. 30 The day before New Years Eve is a perfect time to dance away the troubles of a weird-ass year.

The Pittsburgh veterans of Love Letters will be holding it down as per usual, showing off an indie-pop-meets-alternative-rock sound

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and a catalog that spans decades. Joining the fun is LoFi Delphi (big rock sound with poppy melodies) and garage rock outfit Dark Lines.

The party takes place at Howlers. MF 8 p.m.

4509 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. $7. 412-682-0320 or www.howlerspittsburgh.com

[PUNK] + SUN., DEC. 31 Hold onto your butts, people. There will be a New Years Punk Extravaganza at {PHOTO COURTESY OF HAYLEY MANDEL} The Shop that is sure to make all your punk-rock dreams come true. This year sucked total ass, and nothing can quite exorcise a dumpster-fire year like headbanging with your friends.

Join in with Concealed Blade, CHOIR, Barlow, Peace Talks The Electric Word Life Band, Charged D.I.S. and Substance (from Houston, Texas). Stop by, if you ain’t a jerk. MF 8 p.m.

4214 Main St., Bloomfield. $5. All ages. www.facebook.com/theshoppittsburgh/

& SHOOTING CENTER

UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT

[SOUL] + SUN., DEC. 31 If punk isn’t your thing, head down to Mr. Smalls for another New Years Eve party option. The Commonheart headlines (a few of its members performed the national anthem at this month’s Steelers game against the Patriots), ringing in the new year with its energetic, passionate strain of soul-infused rock ’n’ roll. Kicking things off is the ever-reliable and omnipresent DJ Selecta (with special guest Daru Jones), and Cisco Kid’s laid-back funky rock. If you don’t know that crew, start with Cisco Kid’s “Genial Gene” — it’s a charmer. AG. 8 p.m. 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $25. All ages. www.mrsmalls.com

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Guns, shooting lessons, indoor shooting range, ammo, accessories!

VISIT OUR INDOOR SHOOTING RANGE - OPEN 7 DAYS

2980 LEBANON CHURCH RD. WEST MIFFLIN, PA 15122 • 412-469-9992 W W W . A N T H O N YA R M S . C O M +

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TO SUBMIT A LISTING: WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS {ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

ROCK/POP THU 28 HOWLERS. J Marinelli, Playoff Beard, Keen Genie. 9 p.m.

Bloomfield. 412-682-0320.

FRI 29 MOONDOG’S. James Drake & Chris Taylor Trio. 8:30 p.m.

Blawnox. 412-828-2040.

REX THEATER. A Very Grateful Holiday w/ theCAUSE. 9 p.m.

South Side. 412-381-6811.

SAT 30 BAJA BAR AND GRILL. Shot O’ Soul. 9 p.m. Fox Chapel.

412-963-0640.

DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Mr. B & The Bad Boys. 9:30 p.m.

Robinson. 412-489-5631.

KNUCKLEHEAD’S BAR. Tobacco Road. 9:30 p.m. Ross.

412-366-7468.

MOONDOG’S. Norman Nardini. 9 p.m. Blawnox.

412-828-2040.

REX THEATER. Tropidelic w/ Bumpin’ Uglies, Derlee & Stationary Pebbles. 7 p.m.

South Side. 412-381-6811.

SMILING MOOSE. Pop Punk Night. 10 p.m. South Side.

412-439-5706.

SUN 31

Daily food & drink specials Great happy hour Official Penguins Headquarters Open daily till 2am Pens Special $ .75 2 Coors Light bottles $ .59 2 20oz Coors Light drafts 1020 Washington pike • Bridgeville pa 15017 412.221.7808 • www.31sportsbargrill.com 22

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

BAJA BAR AND GRILL. Dancing Queen. 9 p.m.

Fox Chapel. 412-963-0640.

THE R BAR. Billy the Kid’s Steel Town All-Stars. 7 p.m. Dormont.

412-942-0882.

REX THEATER. Too Many Zooz. 9 p.m. South Side.

412-381-6811.

SMILING MOOSE. Falls of Rauros, Immortal Bird & Pyrithe. 6 p.m. South Side.

412-431-4668.

SPIRIT HALL & LODGE. LongTurn. 8 p.m. Lawrenceville.

412-586-4441.

FRI 29 ANDYS WINE BAR. DJ Malls Spins Vinyl. 5 p.m. Downtown.

412-773-8884.

BELVEDERE’S. Down & Derby Disco Skate. Disco skate. 10 p.m.

Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555.

CATTIVO. DJ DavefrmPGH. 9 p.m.

Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157.

DEE’S CAFE. Soul & Rock-n-Roll w/ DJ Ian. 10 p.m. South Side.

412-431-1314.

THE FLATS ON CARSON. Pete Butta. 10 p.m. South Side.

412-586-7644.

ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. 9 p.m. Downtown.

412-874-4582.

RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. 9 p.m. South Side.

412-381-1330.

SAT 30 BELVEDERE’S. Dj nice rec and killjoy. Y2k pop. 10 p.m.

Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555.

DIESEL. DJ CK. 10 p.m.

South Side. 412-431-8800.

MIXTAPE. DJ Antithesis.

‘The 1990s (& a bag of chips)’ dance party. 9 p.m. Garfield.

412-661-1727.

PERLE CHAMPAGNE BAR. DJ Tenova. ladies night. 9 p.m.

Downtown. 412-471-2058.

SUN 31 BELVEDERE’S. djs admc + killjoy. 10 p.m. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2555.

TUE 02 THE GOLDMARK. Pete Butta.

Reggae & dancehall. 10 p.m.

Lawrenceville. 412-688-8820.

THE SUMMIT. Dig Now Sounds w/ Hot Honey. 9 p.m.

Mt. Washington. 412-918-1647.

EARLY WARNING ROSTAM

WED 03 KEYSTONE BAR. The Bo’Hog Brothers. 7 p.m. Sewickley.

724-758-4217.

DJS THU 28 BELVEDERE’S. Snowball ‘84.

Final 80s night winter promthemed. 10 p.m. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2555.

THE FUNHOUSE @ MR. SMALLS. Centrifuge.

Non-genre specific electronic music night showcasing aspiring fresh talent to veterans alike.

9 p.m. Millvale. 412-821-4447.

PERLE CHAMPAGNE BAR. Bobby D Bachata. 10 p.m.

Downtown. 412-471-2058.

[THU., FEB. 01]

Poppy Stage AE, 400 North Shore Drive, North Side [MON., FEB. 05]

Tiny Moving Parts Cattivo, 146 44th St., Lawrenceville [THU., FEB. 08]

ROSTAM The Andy Warhol Museum, 117 Sandusky St., North Side

HEAVY ROTATION

HIP HOP/R&B

Here are the songs CP music writer Meg Fair can’t stop listening to:

SAT 30 THE FUNHOUSE @ MR. SMALLS. #Lonerz. 7:30 p.m.

Millvale. 412-526-3563.

WED 03 ROCKS LANDING BAR & GRILLE. Tony Campbell feat. Teresa Hawthorne.

7:30 p.m. McKees Rocks.

412-875-5809.

Charly Bliss

“Julia”

BLUES My Chemical Romance

THU 28 O’DONNA’S. The Bo’Hog Brothers. 8 p.m. Beaver.

878-313-3418.

“The Only Hope For Me Is You”

FRI 29 CIOPPINO RESTAURANT & CIGAR BAR. The Midnight Express Band. 7 p.m. Strip District.

412-281-6593.

PEPPERS N’AT. Roger Barbour Band. 7 p.m. Braddock.

412-660-0600.

Mixtapes

“Mt. Hope”

JAZZ THU 28 SAVOY RESTAURANT. Roger Humphries & RH Factor. 8 p.m. Strip District.

412-281-0660.

Waxahatchee

“Never Been Wrong”

FRI 29 ANDORA RESTAURANT FOX CHAPEL. Pianist Harry Cardillo & vocalist Charlie Sanders. 6:30 p.m.

Fox Chapel. 412-967-1900.

SAT 30 THE MONROEVILLE RACQUET CLUB. Jazz Bean Live. 7 p.m. Monroeville.

412-728-4155.

WALLACE’S TAP ROOM. Tony Campbell Jazzsurgery.

5 p.m. East Liberty. 412-665-0555.

SUN 31

ACOUSTIC

OTHER MUSIC

FRI 29

THU 28

BAR 3 MILLVALE. Todd and Dale.

8:30 Millvale. 412-408-3870.

RIVERS CASINO. Tres Lads.

Drum Bar. 9 p.m. North Side.

412-231-7777.

SAT 30

FRI 29

BEER HEAD BAR. Eclectic Acoustics. 8 p.m. North Side.

412-322-2337.

BIER’S PUB. Joel Pace Organ Trio. 9 p.m.

North Side. 412-224-2163.

HAMBONE’S. Acoustic HOLIDAY INN Brunch. Acoustic Brunch MONROEVILLE. welcomes all styles of The Teresa music, poetry, spoken Hawthorn & Legasee www. per word, comedy in an R&B Band, DJ Rick. pa pghcitym open mic format. We .co 8 p.m. Monroeville. also have one ‘Feature 412-728-4155.

Artist’ sandwiched in the ROCKS LANDING BAR middle of our show. 10:30 a.m. & GRILLE. Tony Campbell, Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

John Hall, Howie Alexander & Dennis Garner. 7 p.m.

McKees Rocks. 412- 875- 5809.

ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339.

Pittsburgh Banjo Club. 8 p.m.

North Side. 412-321-1834.

HAMBONE’S. Ian Kane, PARK HOUSE. Shelf Life Ronnie Weiss & Tom Boyce.

String Band. 9 p.m. North Side.

Jazz Standards, showtunes 412-224-2273. & blues. 6:30 p.m. Lawrenceville.

412-681-4318.

SUN 31

FULL LIST ONLINE

WED 03

MON 01

REGGAE

TUE 02

THU 28

RILEY’S POUR HOUSE. Martin Rosenberg. 7 p.m.

Carnegie. 412-279-0770.

PIRATA. The Flow Band. 9 p.m.

Downtown. 412-323-3000.

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DOROTHY SIX BLAST FURNACE CAFE. Gypsy Stringz. 6 p.m. Homestead.

412-464-9023.

LINDEN GROVE. Dancing Queen. 9 p.m. Castle Shannon.

412-882-8687.

RIVERS CASINO. Nina Sainato. Levels. 9 p.m.

No Bad JuJu. Drum Bar. 9 p.m.

North Side. 412-231-7777.

SAT 30 RIVERS CASINO. On The Level. Levels. 9 p.m. Totally 80s.

Drum Bar. 9 p.m. North Side.

412-231-7777.

SUN 31 LINDEN GROVE. Artistree.

6 p.m. Castle Shannon.

412-882-8687.

RIVERS CASINO. DTO Polka.

Levels. 3 p.m. Dueling Pianos.

Levels. 8 p.m. Velveeta.

Drum Bar. 9 p.m. North Side.

412-231-7777.

STAGE AE. Lotus. 8 p.m.

North Side. 412-229-5483.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

What to do IN PITTSBURGH

Dec 27- JAN 2 WEDNESDAY 27 Family Fun Days

PHIPPS CONSERVATORY Oakland. For more info visit phipps.conservatory.org.

Through Dec. 30.

Demos Papadimas & His Band w/ The Local CLUB CAFE South Side.

412-431-4950. Over 21 event.

Tickets: ticketweb.com/opus one. 8p.m.

THURSDAY 28 The Play

O’REILLY THEATER Downtown.

412-316-1600.

Tickets: ppt.org.

Through Jan. 6.

The Reckoning CLUB CAFE South Side.

412-431-4950. Over 21 event.

Tickets: ticketweb.com/opus one. 8p.m.

FRIDAY 29 The Clarks

JERGEL’S RHYTHM GRILLE

Warrendale. 724-799-8333.

Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8:30p.m.

Cirque Dreams Holidaze

The Commonheart w/ Cisco Kid & Selecta

BENEDUM CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666.

Tickets: trustarts.org.

Through Dec. 30.

MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-421-4447.

All ages event. Tickets: ticket web.com/opusone. 8p.m.

A Very Grateful Holiday w/ theCAUSE

Highmark First Night VARIOUS LOCATIONS Downtown. 412-456-6666.

Tickets: trustarts.org. 6p.m.

REX THEATER South Side.

412-381-1681. Over 21 event.

Tickets: greyareaprod.com.

9p.m.

New Years Eve at Il Tetto

SATURDAY 30

SIENNA MERCATO Downtown. Over 21 event.

Tickets: siennamercatonye. eventbrite.com. 8p.m.

Vibro Kings

HARD ROCK CAFE Station Square. 412-481-ROCK. With special guest Grapevine.

Over 21 event.

Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 10p.m.

MONDAY 1

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Tropidelic, Bumpin’ Uglies, Derlee & Stationary Pebbles

Over 21 event. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 8p.m.

REX THEATER South Side.

412-381-1681.

Start Making Sense: A Tribute to Talking Heads

MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-421-4447.

All ages event.

Tickets: ticketweb.com/opus one. 8p.m.

SUNDAY 31 STAGE AE North Side.

Tickets: ticketmaster.com

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[YEAR IN REVIEW: STAGE]

THEY ACT OUT THEIR TECHNOLOGICALLY INDUCED IMPULSES

The year in Pittsburgh theater in strong women and vulnerable heroes: Let us praise Off the Wall Theater’s one-woman drama The Pink Unicorn. Amy Landis zinged as a conservative Christian widow challenging — and challenged by — the mores of her small town over revelations of the gender identity of her only child. Ingrid Sonnichsen directed playwright Elise Forier Edie’s 2013 tale of motherhood under siege and an unexpected journey.

Greg Caridi soared as an unlikely hero in the South Park Theatre production of Trumbo: Red, White and Blacklisted, skillfully directed by Christopher Josephs.

For those who don’t remember the real political “witch hunts” of the 1950s, Oscar-winning screenwriter Dalton Trumbo served actual jail time for not “naming names” to the House Un-American Activities Committee. Son Christopher Trumbo wrote the 2003 bioplay, based mostly on his father’s letters and public statements.

New Horizon Theater’s production of Lotto: Experience the Dream provided Chrystal Bates with a near-perfect role: a combination of sexy mama and commonsense matriarch of a family grappling with sudden wealth and the disasters it brings. Eileen J. Morris, artistic director of the Ensemble Theatre in Houston, directed the 1991 comedy, written by the late Cliff Roquemore and adapted/ updated by his son Bryan.

Another reason to celebrate New Horizon’s 25th-anniversary season came with Josh: The Black Babe Ruth, by Michael A. Jones. In the title role, as Pittsburgh’s own Josh Gibson, Jonathan Berry explored the fragile, short life of a future Hall of Famer stymied by the systemic racism that withheld the Major League stature he deserved. Charles Dumas directed the melodic, surreal 2008 one-act.

Rebecca Harris dominated City Theatre’s production of Ironbound as a Polish émigré, post-Solidarność, struggling through more than 20 years of heartache and hope, marriages, domestic abuse and New Jersey bus stops.

City Theatre artistic director Tracy Brigden sensitively directed the 2014 comedydrama by Martyna Majok.

Mikhail Bulgakov, a real person and a dissident in the pre-World War II USSR, is turned upside-down in Quantum Theatre’s funny/scary Collaborators, gleefully directed by Jed Allen Harris.

John Hodge’s surreal 2011 comedy posits the “working relationship” between the novelist and playwright — played by the mercurial Tony Bingham — and his biggest fan: Josef Stalin. What will an artist do to survive with one of the most evil men in history?

JD Taylor and Rebecca Harris in Ironbound, at City Theatre {PHOTO COURTESY OF KRISTI JAN HOOVER}

STRONG ROLES {BY MICHELLE PILECKI}

{IMAGE COURTESY OF THE ARTIST, PILAR CORRIAS LONDON, AND STANDARD (OSLO)}

Of infinite duration: Ian Cheng’s Emissary Sunsets the Self (detail)

[ART REVIEW]

FUTURES UNWRITTEN {BY LISSA BRENNAN}

A

T THIS moment, Emissary Sunsets

the Self, by Ian Cheng, can be seen at the Forum Gallery of the Carnegie Museum of Art. In the next moment, and in all moments of museum operation through Jan. 28, it can still be seen, but what exactly it is that you’ll see then is different than it would have been a moment ago. This work, the final installment of Cheng’s digitalsimulation trilogy Emissaries, is constantly changing. And what it will become next remains to be seen not only for the viewers, but for the artist as well.

Cheng’s chosen medium is not paint, film or metal, but coding. The internationally known artist’s background in cognitive science and artificial intelligence propels his artistic investigation into humanity’s evolution, our creation of technology, our use of it to try to better understand

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

ourselves, and its evolution away from us. In the Emissary series’ three episodes, characters have been equipped with specific goals, features, styles of movement, and idiosyncracies, and they act out their technologically induced impulses on a giant, floor-to-ceiling screen.

EMISSARY SUNSETS THE SELF continues through Jan. 28. Carnegie Museum of Art, 4400 Forbes Ave., Oakland.

412-622-3212 or www.cmoa.org

Placed in the ecosystem of a volcanic site, with thousands of years elapsing between installments, these humanoid beings work to accomplish their missions.

Because nothing is ever easy even if you’re a

goddamned computer character, this world is overseen by a character named Mother AI (a fact one learns by reading about the work, though not by viewing it). To the low rumble of the soundtrack, Mother AI perpetually alters the details of the landscape, forcing all to adapt and to modify how they approach their undertakings inside the relentlessly fluid environment. The work is, technically, of “infinite duration.”

During two separate viewings, each of less than an hour, a gallery visitor can determine that the beings of this world seem somewhat primitive, and that when confronted with the introduction of a foreign entity — Mother AI — they respond with guarded curiosity.

What all of this translates to visually is something itself almost primitive, and endearingly simplistic; in terms of video

ART/NEWS {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} Art can respond eloquently to current events; sometimes it even anticipates them.

Or so it seems, in retrospect, with DIGS — Sexism in the Arts, a group show at Artists Image Resource curated by Carolyn Pierotti.

Sexism is a perennial issue, but DIGS opened in May, some five months before this year’s floodgates of allegations of sexual misconduct and assault were flung open with charges against globally known arts purveyor Harvey Weinstein. At least one work in DIGS, Sarika Goulatia’s interactive, wrenchingly intimate Prosecuterix, was re-exhibited elsewhere (at Carlow University).

Another cogent look at related issues was Hacking/Modding/Remixing as Feminist Protest, curator Angela Washko’s big, multidecade retrospective of women artists exploring both art and technology.

Discussions of race also continued to animate galleries here (including controversy over inclusion in the Three Rivers Arts Festival of a white artist’s painting depicting the death of Tamir Rice). Perhaps the biggest statement was 20/20: The Studio Museum in Harlem and the Carnegie Museum of Art, an ambitious blend of works from the two institutions that sometimes searchingly, sometimes scorchingly addressed what “America” means through the lens of race.

In Oaths and Epithets — Work by Sonya Clark, at Contemporary Craft, the Virginiabased artist employed everyday materials ($5 bills, human hair) to explore slavery and its legacy. Firelei Baez brilliantly worked similar turf in Firelei Baez: Bloodlines, a show of 17 paintings at The Andy Warhol Museum.

Braddock’s own LaToya Ruby Frazier — a MacArthur “genius grant” winner who still lives here part time — finally got her first hometown solo exhibits. Excerpts of Frazier’s iconic series The Notion of Family (at Silver Eye Center for Photography) forged a metaphor linking urban abandonment and wounded black bodies, while her collaborative On the Making of Steel Genesis: Sandra Gould Ford + LaToya Ruby Frazier (at the August Wilson Center) honored the legacies of both Pittsburgh steelworkers and a fellow African-American woman artist. And at the Mattress Factory, Vanessa German offered sometimes. we.cannot.be.with.our.bodies, a tworoom installation that’s an overwhelming statement on black pain and resilience.

Other shows that impressed CP critics include: Natasha Neira’s canny installation This Isn’t About You (709 Penn Gallery); Irving Penn: Beyond Beauty, a huge touring show honoring the pioneering photographer (Frick Art Museum); local comics hero Ed Piskor’s first-ever solo show, Hermetically Sealed (ToonSeum); and Pittsburgh Center for the Arts’ spring suite of nine solo exhibits, especially work by Nikki Brugnoli, Misty Morrison, and Devan Shimoyama and Danny Ferrell.

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[YEAR IN REVIEW: VISUAL ART]

Sonya Clark’s “Pearl of Mother”

games, it’s closer in appearance to Oregon Trail than Call of Duty. It’s captivating to watch, briefly, when viewed cold. If you should come to the work with no context, it’s likely that you could discern only that there is an ever-changing, minimal landscape with a central object around which the characters move. Observe for long enough, and you’ll understand that this isn’t a looped work with beginning and end that keeps replaying, but one proceeding in real time.

What amendment to their surroundings will next take place, and how they will refashion themselves in response, is unwritten. They, and we, have to wait and see. The characters slip, slide, shuffle and stutter; they engage and disengage, they make decisions; and react and respond to stimuli; and they do all of this for the first time, every time.

However, while it’s possible to be entertained by what you’re looking at for a little while, this is a work of art that, as contrary as it may sound, is not really about what you’re looking at. It’s as least as much about what’s behind the imagery as it is about the imagery itself. And most of what is being described in this review is based not on actually experiencing Emissary, but rather on knowledge sought out by the writer in attempt to comprehend this work better.

The building blocks of Emissary’s inception; the disconnection between the artist and the ongoing and unstoppable transformation of his work; the artist’s intentions within the narrative he’s shaped; what precisely that narrative is — awareness of all of this is essential for a complete interaction with this work. But while you might have to do some legwork, that effort will be thoroughly rewarded.

This an incredibly polarizing work of art. Some will argue that the limited response that’s possible if a viewer takes it at face value is detrimental to the piece as a whole. Some will give it props as a technological achievement while refusing to acknowledge it as fine art. This is a piece with “Rite of Spring”-like capacity to enrage purists to the point of apoplexy.

At the same time, it’s a piece that can draw the attention of people who don’t believe themselves to be interested in visual art at all, but who know themselves to be fascinated by the latest utilization of binary digits.

As Emissary Sunsets the Self straddles a line between art and technology, it will challenge perceptions and preconceptions of what exactly a work of art is. This raises a million questions and engenders endless opportunity for debate. And however else you define art, that’s one of the most desired results a work can produce.

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FOR A TRANSCRIPT OF CP’S EXIT INTERVIEW WITH PIECHOCKI, SEE WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM. The OPA teamed with PennDOT on Arizona-based Laurie Lundquist’s “Behind Every Wall,” the multi-panel mural adorning the Route 28 retaining wall; with Pittsburgh International Airport, to get artists more opportunities there; with the city and Pittsburgh Downtown Partnership, to create Market Square Public Art, a series of temporary artworks Downtown including Dutch artist Allard van Hoorn’s 2016 sound installation “Mix-n-Match”; and with Neighborhood Allies, on a pilot program to engage residents of six neighborhoods to make temporary public art.

“Renee Piechocki has forever changed

Office of Public Art. {CP PHOTOS BY RENEE ROSENS

IF THIS YEAR’S controversy over Oakland’s Stephen Foster statue was the final big public-art news of Renee Piechocki’s tenure, it was hardly the first. Piechocki, founding director of the city’s Office of Public Art (OPA), is stepping down this month. In her 13 years there, the office loomed large in Pittsburgh’s civic life.

The OPA, a public-private partnership of the Greater Pittsburgh Arts Council and the city’s Department of City Planning, provides technical assistance and education about public art regionally.

Piechocki, a public-art expert then newly arrived from New York City, helped launch it in 2005.

Working part time at first, and eventually full time with a staff of four, Piechocki helped the city inventory its public art for the first time, and rewrite the city art commission’s by-laws. She helped create the online Pittsburgh Artist Registry, which connects artists with work opportunities and now includes more than 900 visual, literary and performing artists. She oversaw creation of the Pittsburgh Art in Public Places photo books, illuminating both familiar and easily overlooked artworks Downtown and on the North Side. And Piechocki was on the team that saved Romare Bearden’s mural “Pittsburgh Recollections” from demolition at the old Gateway Center T stop and relocated it in the new station.

ded by Sallyann Kluz as head of the city’s

{BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

Renee Piechocki (top frame) is being succee

MAKING ROOM FOR ART

TEEL}

[ART]

the way Pittsburgh thinks about the connections between artists, public spaces and neighborhoods,” says Heinz Endowments senior program officer Janet Sarbaugh in a statement.

Local artists themselves have appreciated such innovations as the Pittsburgh Artist Registry. “It’s a real simple, painless way to put your work out there,” says comics artist Marcel L. Walker, who says clients who hire him for freelance work usually have seen the Registry first. “It’s always been very helpful to me.”

In a recent interview with CP, Piechocki spoke highly of her experience with OPA and the larger community.

“People were willing to listen and also to take risks,” she said. The North Side resident is leaving OPA to pursue her own artwork and to travel. She’ll be succeeded at OPA by Sallyann Kluz, an architect and urban designer who’s now OPA’s associate director.

Piechocki’s tenure has not been without controversy. Some in Pittsburgh’s art community, for instance, criticized her belief that public-art projects here should be open to artists from everywhere, not just locals. Critics said local art dollars should go to Pittsburgh-based artists; Piechocki says we shouldn’t restrict where artists can work (and that budgets and logistics limit the pool for many projects to locals anyway). And challenges remain, including securing stable funding for both public-art commissions and the OPA itself. So-called “percent for art” laws in Pittsburgh and Allegheny County — which mandate that a set proportion of the costs of publicly funded projects go toward public art — have not been enforced, and advocates continue trying to craft an alternative.

But as Piechocki notes, “A lot of cities in the country now have public-art legislation that works with private developers, so the work can either happen at the site they’re developing or it goes into other sites in the community.”

Another favorite idea of Piechocki’s is rethinking how we conceive of “public art.”

Earlier this year, when she advocated for removing the Foster statue (which critics call racist), Piechocki received angry mail from fans of the landmark sculpture. The controversy strengthened Piechocki’s belief in the value of temporary artworks, which are more affordable, don’t require long-term maintenance, and can speak more nimbly to our evolving society. “What you want is not what people are gonna want a hundred years from now,” she says. “What if there’s something that’s always changing, that helps us keep future-focused?”

D RI S C OL L @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

[YEAR IN REVIEW: BOOKS]

[YEAR IN REVIEW: DANCE]

MOVING

LIT UP

Jenny Johnson {PHOTO COURTESY OF BROOKE WYATT}

Of 2017’s many memorable local dance performances, here are eight that stood out (in order of performance): Jasmine Hearn in blue, sable, and burning (Braddock Carnegie Library, Jan. 26).

Fueled by Robin Coste Lewis’ poem “Voyage of the Sable Venus,” Hearn’s tour de force solo work, which she described as a deeply rooted investigation and conversation with herself, proved a moving portrait of an artist at the top of her game.

Julia Erickson in Pittsburgh Ballet Theatre’s Alice in Wonderland (Benedum Center, Feb. 10). As the deliciously wicked Queen of Hearts in choreographer Derek Deane’s ballet, Erickson had all the deportment of a Disney villainess, including a spirit-withering smile combined with impeccable dancing.

Maria Caruso in “Sunday’s Child” (Byham Theater, Feb. 18). As part of her stylistically diverse and physically demanding one-woman show Phoenix Rising, the Bodiography artistic director was spellbinding in choreographer Anjali Austin’s heartfelt “Sunday’s Child.”

Vulnerable and emotionally exposed, Caruso’s performance left audience members misty.

Lindsay Fisher in Over Exposed (New Hazlett Theater, April 7). Fisher described the very personal production as “a collection of the doubts, insecurities, everyday joys and small victories that make up one woman’s life.” Skillfully danced, Fisher’s performance was funny, touching and memorable.

Moriah Ella Mason in Sex Werque (Carnegie Stage, July 27). Candidly based on Mason’s real-life experiences as a stripper, Sex Werque explored attitudes and misconceptions about the sex industry, and her and fellow strippers’ feelings about the profession.

Mason was resplendent in the groundbreaking one-woman dance-theater show.

CorningWorks in Six A Breast (New Hazlett Theater, Sept. 10). Beth Corning, Sally Rousse and Laurie Van Wieren delivered a series of clever vignettes about the absurd way women have been treated by society and trained to feel in their roles in relationships with men. Humorous and poignant, the work and its veteran cast impressed.

Texture Contemporary Ballet in “Journey to Closure” (New Hazlett Theater, Sept. 29). Performing to a moving soundtrack

by Max Richter, Texture’s adroit dancers appeared like wisps of smoke flowing through Kelsey Bartman’s sophisticated and ethereal ballet that showed what the company is truly capable of.

Anne Morgan and the Point Park Conservatory Dance Company in “Cold Virtues” (Rockwell Theatre, Dec. 1). Included in CDC’s Winter Dance Concert, Adam Hougland’s signature ballet set in a Depressionera speakeasy oozed choreographic genius.

Led by the mesmerizing Morgan, CDC’s dancers danced it impeccably.

{BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

Lindsay Fisher in Over Exposed {PHOTO COURTESY OF BEN VIATORI}

{BY STEVE SUCATO}

Some notable 2017 releases by local authors: Syrian-born Osama Alomar got national press for The Teeth of the Comb and Other Stories (New Directions Press), his collection of very short, often parable-like stories.

Geeta Kothari, well known as an editor (The Kenyon Review) and educator (University of Pittsburgh), released I Brake for Moose (Alleyway Books), her debut collection of sharply observed stories. Novelist Jacob Bacharach followed his memorable debut The Bend of the World with The Doorposts of Your House and On Your Gates (Liveright), which pungently blended Old Testament themes with a contemporary Western Pennsylvania family entangled in a real-estate scheme. And J.D. Barker, the thriller writer who lives in Pittsburgh part time, earned strong reviews for his second novel, The Fourth Monkey (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt), about a detective tracking the last victim of a deceased serial killer.

In nonfiction, Matthew Newton added to Bloomsbury Press’s Object Lessons series of short books about the secret lives of ordinary things with Shopping Mall, a smart and empathetic look at this waning icon of 20th-century American consumer culture. In 30 Days a Black Man (Lyon Press), veteran author Bill Steigerwald told the story of legendary Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reporter Ray Sprigle’s risky exposé of Jim Crow: In the late 1940s, Sprigle, who was white, went undercover as a black man in the Deep South. And Pitt history professor Marcus Rediker offered the self-explanatorily yet surprisingly titled The Fearless Benjamin Lay: The Quaker Dwarf Who Became the First Revolutionary Abolitionist (Beacon Press).

In poetry, Cameron Barnett’s anticipated debut collection, The Drowning Boy’s Guide to Water (Autumn House Press) showcased a writer “who’s found his own voice,” wrote CP critic Fred Shaw. And Jenny Johnson’s own debut collection, In Full Velvet (Sarabande Books), Shaw enthused, “beautifully presents Johnson as a poet fulfilling big expectations.”

Meanwhile, one of Pittsburgh’s most lauded poets, Robert Gibb, released not one but two prize-winning collections: After (winner of the Marsh Hawk Press Poetry Prize) and Among Ruins (Notre Dame Press), which won the Ernest Sandeen Prize.

Still, arguably no resident Pittsburgher had a bigger year in his or her chosen field than did Ed Piskor. The Munhall native was already famed for his Hip Hop Family Tree series of graphic histories; in July, Marvel Comics announced the Munhall native would create “The Grand Design,” an unprecedented epic, single-artist, multi-publication retelling of the X-Men saga. The first comic hit earlier this month.

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FOR THE WEEK OF

12.28.17-01.04.18 Full events listed online at www.pghcitypaper.com I doubt we at City Paper are alone in wishing 2017 the hastiest of farewells.

But that’s what’s great about an arbitrary “new year”: We imagine that at midnight, we start afresh. As always, this restorative fiction is aided by the city’s biggest annual evening-length festival. Highmark First Night Pittsburgh really is a fine (and affordable) excuse to enjoy the performing and visual arts alongside some 50,000 fellow human persons.

{PHOTO COURTESY OF RENEE ROSENSTEEL}

The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust event takes place in Downtown’s 14-block Cultural District, with more than 100 shows, exhibits and activities, both indoors and outdoors. Outside, for example: live ice sculpting alongside the fire-arts theatrics of Steel Town Fire. Indoors: silent disco at the August Wilson Center with HollyHood, DJ Inception and DJ Big Phill. The Downtown galleries are all open, and the Fort Pitt Museum, too. Duck into the Byham Theater for a comedy showcase with John Evans, Wally Baram and Day Bracey.

Elsewhere, catch magic acts, contemporary, African and Chinese dance, and arts activities for kids, or try soul line-dancing in EQT Plaza. Musically, sample everything from rock ’n’ roll to bagpipers, jazz combos, classical guitarists and brass bands.

Featured groups include Byron Nash and Plan B (at the outdoor Dollar Bank Stage) and WYEP local band of the year The Crew of the Half Moon (inside the Trust Arts Education Center).

Also, make time for the community parade along Penn (theme: “Love, Peace, Pittsburgh”). At 10:45 p.m., see headliner Lee Fields and the Expressions, fronted by the soul and funk vet, at the Highmark Stage, right where the Raising the Future of Pittsburgh Ball ascends at midnight.

(Fireworks follow.)

Admission is the $10 price of a First Night button, available online; at the Box Office at Theater Square; and participating Giant Eagles (where there’s a $1 discount with an Advantage Card).

BY BILL O’DRISCOLL

6 p.m.-midnight Sun., Dec. 31. Downtown. $10 button is all-access (free for kids under 5); selected indoor events require pre-registration. 412-456-6666 or www.firstnightpittsburgh.trustarts.org

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^ Thu., Dec. 28: Holidays at the Frick

thursday 12.28 EXHIBIT Holidays at the Frick is winding down. This year’s tour, a glimpse at the lifestyles of the 99 percent during the Gilded Age, is Through the Back Door: Domestic Service at the Clayton During the Holidays, which runs until Jan. 7.

Afterward, catch Undressed: A History of Fashion in Underwear, the Frick Art Museum’s current exhibition. You can also take advantage of extended Friday hours (until 9 p.m.), and sit down for a holiday meal at The Café. Amanda Reed 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Holidays at the Frick continues through Jan. 7. 7227 Reynolds St., Point Breeze. $11-20. 412371-0600 or www.thefrickpittsburgh.org

STAGE Steelers lore from the 1970s is an infinitely renewable resource, and few tap it like Pittsburgh Public Theater. The company’s multi-year hit The Chief was a one-man show about Art Rooney Sr.; now it brings back Rocky Bleier to reprise The Play, his one-man show written by Gene Collier.

The Steelers icon winningly tells his remarkable life story, including his service in Vietnam and his near-legendary comeback from a catastrophic injury to star on four Super Bowlwinning teams. The hit show, which debuted last year,

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

gets nine performances only. Bill O’Driscoll 7 p.m.

Continues through Sun., Jan. 6. 621 Penn Ave., Downtown. $60-80. 412-316-1600 or www.ppt.org

friday 12.29 CIRCUS The New York Daily News has called Cirque Dreams Holidaze “[a] delicious confection of charm, sparkle and talent by the sleigh load.”

Tonight and tomorrow, Cirque comes to the Benedum Center for three shows as part of its 10th-anniversary tour, courtesy of the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust. The production features more than 300 costumes, with acrobats performing gravity-defying feats while dressed as snowmen, penguins, candles, reindeer and toy soldiers. The production is conceived and directed

by Neil Goldberg. AR 7:30 p.m. Also 2 and 7:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 30. 237 Seventh St., Downtown. $40.25-60.25. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org ^ Thu., Dec. 28: The Play {PHOTO COURTESY OF MICHAEL HENNINGER}

{PHOTO COURTESY OF CIRQUE DREAMS HOLIDAZE}

^ Fri., Dec. 29: Cirque Dreams Holidaze

COMEDY Let’s face it: The ideal time to see a live radio play called “The Killbot That Saved Christmas” was probably at this time last week, when the nonstop holiday music was turning your brain into figgy pudding. But as some of us learned around the Christmas tree, you can’t always get what you want. Instead, visit Unplanned Comedy Pittsburgh tonight to see murder-mystery comedy “Killbot” and another short comedy by formerly Pittsburgh-based writer Abby Danger Denton: “Ladyfingers,” “a cynically repurposed sitcom plot about anarchists, baked goods and the merits of a gynocracy.”

The show features local actors, standup comedy sets by Shannon Norman and Isaac Crow, and live music by Midge Crickett.

BO 8 p.m. 5001 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $5. www. facebook.org (“kill-bot Christmas”)

saturday 12.30 RADIO A local institution goes by the ^ Sun., Dec. 31: Too Many Zooz wayside as Prosody bids goodbye.

WESA 90.5 FM has canceled the on-air, full-length version of the locally produced public-radio showcase for poets and writers, though the show will live on as a podcast, and continue with shorter on-air spots. This morning’s farewell episode features the program’s longtime host and producer, poet Jan Beatty, welcoming poet and Pitt Poetry Series editor Ed Ochester along with John Schulman, who co-hosted Prosody when it debuted (on WYEP) 28 years ago. BO 6:30 a.m. www.wesa.fm

TALK We know, you’re not supposed to talk politics around the Thanksgiving or Christmas tables. But how about on New Year’s Eve Eve? In a theater? John McIntire is betting on it. Tonight, at the Oaks Theater, the local pundit and comedian addresses the CONTINUES ON PG. 32

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SHORT LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 31

EVERYONE IS A CRITIC

EVENT: Chatham Baroque’s

A Jubilant Season at Chatham University, Shadyside CRITIC: Caroline Delson, 27, a production manager from Shadyside WHEN: Sun.,

Dec. 17

The event involved Baroque chamber-orchestra music featuring some vocal work and a natural trumpet in a beautiful chapel on Chatham’s campus. I’ve never heard that, so that was really cool. My friend’s mom plays the viola da gamba in the orchestra, so I came out to support her.

Live music is so incredible, and I’m not familiar with this music, so it was really fun to check out here for the first time live. The natural trumpet was amazing, since it is valveless, which means the player has to control the pitch with their mouth. It looked really cool onstage, and the person who played it was very talented. It’s awesome to hear music that was played hundreds of years ago, and there’s such artistry and mastery in live music that I don’t hear often today.

BY AMANDA REED

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ever-more-bizarre political climate in an edition of his John McIntire Dangerously Live Comedy Talk Show that’s modestly themed “Everything’s Insane.” His all-star panel of guests includes Pittsburgh Mayor Bill Peduto, Braddock Mayor and candidate for lieutenant-governor John Fetterman, and Pittsburgh Post-Gazette columnist Tony Norman. The venue has a bar, in case you need one. BO 8 p.m. 310 Allegheny River Blvd., Oakmont. $17-25. www.theoakstheater.com

sunday 12.31 PARTY Celebrate 2018 at the Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh with Countdown to Noon, an alternative New Year’s celebration for those who can’t stay up until midnight. Help the little ones make their own noisemakers or party hat in the MAKESHOP, and resolve to be kinder in 2018 in the Art Studio.

Enjoy live music by Lee Robinson and Iska at noon, get interviewed

by Saturday Light Brigade emcee Larry Berger, and meet Mo Willems’ children’s book characters Elephant and Piggie. AR 10:30 a.m.-1 p.m.

10 Children’s Way, North Side. $14-16 (free for children under 2). 412-322-5058 or www.pittsburghkids.org

MUSIC Maybe you’ve heard (of) Too Many Zooz. The funky brass-and-percussion trio — they call it “brass house” — made their bones busking in New York subways, went viral via YouTube in 2014, and in short order were doing sessions on Beyoncé’s Lemonade and backing her at the 2016 CMA Awards. Well, that guy on baritone sax? He’s Leo Pellegrino, born and raised in Pittsburgh. He’s back for the holidays, and the band — also including trumpeter Matt Doe and percussionist David Parks — bring their wacky outfits (and Pellegrino’s crazy-legs dancin’) to the Rex Theater for an all-ages New Year’s show. You Bred Raptors? and Afro Yaqui Music Collective open. BO 9 p.m. 1602 E. Carson St., South Side. $25-30. www.rextheater.net

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

< Sun. Dec. 31: Countdown to Noon

^ Sun., Dec. 31: Grown Ass People Party

PARTY Four years ago, when Hilary Brown launched the Grown Ass People Party, she had no idea how much demand existed for real parties (not fundraisers) for people over 30 who like diverse crowds, good music and dancing. G.A.P.P. events were regularly topping 300 guests when they went on unexpected hiatus this year. Now G.A.P.P.’s back, at a bigger, brand-new venue. G.A.P.P. NYE, at the North Side’s Hip@the Flashlight Factory, features tunes by DJ Loyal, an open bar, all-night nacho bar and, at midnight, live Brazilizian-style-percussion thunder from Timbeleza. BO 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

831 W. North Ave., North Side. $75 ($100 at the door). www.facebook. com (“grownass people”)

OUTDOORS Most New Year’s celebrations are indoors affairs. But one of the latest to get rolling this year takes place in the woods. The family-friendly First Night Hike at Jennings Environmental Education Center starts at 10:30 p.m., as the state park’s staff and assistants lead an easy one-mile walk on prairie trails beneath a nearly full moon. Hot cider and cocoa around a campfire follow around a midnight campfire.

BO 10:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m. 2951 Prospect Road, Slippery Rock. Free. 724-794-6011 or www.dcnr.pa.gov

monday 01.01 FESTIVAL Hey, there’s gonna be slime, muck and goo on the North Side today, and we’re not talking about a wintertime Kenny Chesney concert! Rather, it’s the tradition of contained messiness of the Carnegie Science Center’s 12th annual MessFest. For the price of general admission to the Center, visitors of all ages can play with that squelchy Oobleck stuff; design a way to keep a raw egg from destruction on the Egg Zipline; finger-paint; compete in a pudding “pi”-eating contest; and more. There are also demonstrations involving explosives and other untidy happenings. Dress appropriately.

BO 10 a.m.-5 p.m. $11.95-19.95. 1 Allegheny Ave., North Side.

412-237-4300 or www.carnegiesciencecenter.org

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SALT-AND-PEPPER TOFU HAD A FLAWLESSLY LIGHT AND FLAVORFUL CRUST

FRESHLY BAKED Madeleine Bakery and Bistro is the newest addition to local bakeries worth a morning visit.

The venue is tucked into a cozy corner of Trenton Avenue and Union Street, in Wilkinsburg, in a turn-of-the-centurybuilding that has lived many lives: as a market, recording studio, yoga studio and, according to one customer, even a dairy. Now Madeleine’s owners and spouses, Andrew and Abigail Stump, are bringing it new life as a French-inspired American bakery.

Prior to opening Madeleine, Andrew, who helms the kitchen, has held positions at Lautrec, Iron Born Pizza, Five Points Artisan Bakeshop and other local venues. At their new space, the Stumps want to focus on classic technique, while offering an approachable neighborhood spot. The bakery’s periwinkle-colored door, accented with gold lettering, is both elegant and inviting.

Inside, the counter boasts a variety of baked goods from sea-salt chocolate-chip cookies, croissants (buttery and perfectly flaky), baguettes, scones and, of course, madeleines. Drip coffee and hot chocolate are also on offer, and the menu will see day-to-day changes and seasonal additions.

A limited selection of sandwiches and salads is in the works.

The neighborhood has already responded with enthusiasm — on Madeleine’s opening Saturday, the bakery quickly sold out of goods.

The refined curation of the menu extends to the interior, which was designed largely by Abigail. For the holiday season, simple wreaths are hung on the cream-colored walls, and the counter is capped with a sturdy butcher-block table and backed with white tile. Two small tables seat eight, and two standing tables are set just in front of the windows.

The name is, in part, an homage to the French pastry, a small lemony sponge cake baked in the shape of a shell, but it’s also special to the couple. “We’re actually going to name our first-born daughter Madeleine, and one day it just kind of popped off: ‘Why don’t we just name the bakery Madeleine?’” says Abigail smiling.

CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

609 S. Trenton Ave., Wilkinsburg.

412-699-1385 NEWS

Pastries from Madeleine Bakery {CP PHOTO BY CELINE ROBERTS}

{BY CELINE ROBERTS}

{CP PHOTO BY VANESSA SONG}

Yuzu Bomb Ramen, with marinated pork belly and 30-minute egg

RAMEN AND MORE {BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

T

HIRTY YEARS AGO, Japanese restau-

rants pushed the boundaries of dining out in America. Confronted with sushi, a generation to whom lasagna or chow mein constituted international cuisine found its mettle tested: The adventurous embraced it, the hidebound, not so much.

Of course, today sushi is so commonplace, it’s surprising if a Chinese or Thai restaurant doesn’t offer it, let alone a Japanese place.

But though it became synonymous with Japanese cuisine in the U.S., sushi is not actually the everyday food of Japan. The country has its own cooking traditions which, while less sensational than raw fish, are just as worthy of notice. It’s been nice, lately, to see a growing appreciation and availability of Japanese cookery in Pittsburgh.

Yuzu Kitchen subtitles itself “a ramen and robata grill,” but really it’s a broader

exploration of Japanese cooking, with a significant portion of the menu dedicated to Thai and Chinese flavors (the owners also run Thai Foon in Robinson). But most of the offerings are Japanese noodle and rice bowls, along with classic bar snacks like karaage, or boneless fried chicken.

YUZU KITCHEN 409 Wood St., Downtown. 412-288-9100 HOURS: Mon.-Thu. 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Fri. 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sat. 12 noon-11 p.m.

PRICES: Appetizers $5-8; entrees $12-15 LIQUOR: Full bar

CP APPROVED The chicken was available plain or spicy, but the only actual difference was whether the smear of Japanese mayo on the plate was white — i.e., unseasoned — or pink

from hot paprika. The white meat chunks were satisfyingly juicy and the crust good and crunchy, but where it should have been fairly light, it was a little too hearty at times, throwing off the flavor-texture balance.

Salt-and-pepper tofu, though, had a flawlessly light and flavorful crust, a peppery punch and perfectly cooked tofu with just the right amount of chew. Finely minced garlic, jalapeño and thin slices of crispy-fried red onion further upped the levels of tasty and textural delight. We could have eaten this dish all night.

Gyoza were both typical and a little extra, filled with pork and chicken, cabbage and leeks, adding up to richer flavor and subtler texture than most, while the ginger-soy dipping sauce delivered on the zingy first half of its name. Curry steak on a stick — actually a sugar-cane skewer — CONTINUES ON PG. 34

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RAMEN AND MORE, CONTINUED FROM PG. 33

varied between tender, well-seasoned beef on one stick and chewier, if not outright tough, meat on the other. The sataystyle peanut dipping sauce was distinctly thick, with clear brown-sugar notes.

The entrée menu features five varieties of ramen, each with a different house-made broth simmered for 18 hours. Each bowl comes with several pre-selected ingredients, and more can be added from the a la carte toppings menu. Angelique selected the most popular, rayu paitan, a chicken-broth base fortified with pork marrow and containing marinated pork belly, scallions, corn, shiitake mushrooms, a 30-minute egg, and the dish’s namesake, rayu, or chili oil. From the toppings list, she added baby bok choy and bean sprouts. The star of all these was undoubtedly the pork belly, whose silken texture was out of this world. The soup itself was mild and unassuming until the rayu was stirred in, creating a broth spicy enough to be its own source of heat on a cold winter night.

On the same menu page was another list headed, simply, “Not Soup.” Most of these were either mein (Chinese-inspired noodle dishes) or don (Japanese rice bowls with savory toppings). Last among these, teriyaki salmon seemed like an outlier from a Japanese steakhouse menu, but it was superior in every way to our expectation of overcooked and over-sweetened. The seared salmon was rosy and succulent, and the teriyaki sauce complex, salty-sweet and savory all at once. Steamed vegetables in garlic butter were a suitably simple, but not bland, accompaniment.

Jason had stir-fry udon from a second menu page that collected various Thai curries, Chinese stir fries, and pan-Asian noodle dishes under the heading “From the Wok.” Angelique found the brown sauce rather one-dimensional in contrast to the other dishes we’d been enjoying, but Jason wasn’t so quick to dismiss its lighter-bodied, but deeply colored, charms. Thin slices of uniformly tender beef, firm shiitake and crunchy bean sprouts rounded out the satisfying texture profile that began with thick, chewy noodles.

“Peanut noodles” were supposed to be basically pad Thai, as per our server, but it seemed like something got lost in translation. All of the components were there: firm rice noodles, crunchy sprouts, crushed peanuts, scrambled egg and ultra-tender chicken, and the flavor profile was in the ballpark. But a thick, sweet-leaning sauce made it seem more like somebody’s personal take on the iconic dish.

More than a ramen house or a robata grill, Yuzu can probably best be described as an Asian restaurant with a Japanese focus.

The Japanese dishes are definitely where we’ll focus when we return.

INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

[PERSONAL CHEF]

BEAN THERE {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} “Baked beans,” she said.

There was a neighborhood holiday potluck the next day, and my wife’s idea was to decant some canned baked beans, season with bacon, and call it a day. I thought the occasion called for home cooking, and turned to our oft-used Better Homes and Gardens New Cook Book.

It’s the 1968 edition (nearly as old as us), a five-ring-binder affair whose hundreds of entries include candy recipes, mid-century delectations (“Glorified Rice”) and ventures into the exotic (“Tamale Pie”).

The baked beans recipe did not look too hard.

INGREDIENTS • 1 pound dry navy beans • 2/3 cup brown sugar • 1 tsp. dry mustard • ¼ cup molasses • ¼ pound bacon * ed • 1 medium onion, sliced * The original says “salt pork,” but I had no idea where to get it, and n. few of us mind bacon.

INSTRUCTIONS Soak the beans overnight and cook in salted water until tender. Drain, reserving liquid. To two cups of the liquid, add the sugar, mustard and molasses. In a two-quart bean pot or casserole dish, combine beans, onion and chopped bacon. Pour liquid over. Cover and bake at 300 degrees for five to seven hours, adding liquid as needed.

That’s a lot of oven time, and I wondered whether our slow-cooker would work just as well. Answer: no. I had doubled the recipe, and after two hours on “high,” little actual cooking had transpired, and the temp seemed nowhere near 300 degrees. I transferred everything into a big stainless-steel pot and stuck it in the oven, as directed, duh.

Navy beans are white, and for me the big mystery was how and when they’d turn that pleasingly mellow brown so familiar from countless cans of Heinz product. When I checked in to stir the little guys after two hours in the oven, it hadn’t happened yet. But five hours of oven time did the trick.

Next time I’ll go more sparingly on the liquid, as this batch was a little soupy. But otherwise these beans looked right and tasted fine, and I didn’t in the least mind taking leftovers home from the party.

D RI S C OL L @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

WE WANT YOUR PERSONAL RECIPES AND THE STORIES BEHIND THEM. EMAIL THEM TO CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM.

[ON THE ROCKS]

DRINKING GLOBALLY New Year’s Traditions Elsewhere {BY CELINE ROBERTS} NEW YEAR’S EVE in the States means

poppin’ bottles of Champagne, but around the world there are different ways to mark the occasion. City Paper asked a few Pittsburghers-by-way-ofelsewhere for their boozy traditions.

“The Italian tradition for New Year’s with me, it’s our homemade limoncello. [It’s] served straight from the freezer, in a somewhat more elegant shot glass; it adds a bit of fun to the evening. Zest 24 lemons, steep the zest in a gallon of grain spirits [190 proof] for 60 days. I use a three-gallon water jug. Make simple syrup with one gallon of water and 36 ounces of sugar. Strain the zest from the grain spirits and combine with the simple syrup. Mix thoroughly.

Place in the freezer to chill, then serve.

People tend to drink this and come back quickly for more. The fun starts about a half-hour later when it kicks in. It’s a great recipe if you would like to forget last year.”

“In Spain, which is where I lived six years, the tradition is to eat grapes. At midnight, the clocks all strike 12, and at every strike of the bell, you eat a grape. You make a wish with every one, or a New Year’s resolution. The trick is [to] buy seedless grapes because otherwise you’re at risk of choking. Also in Spain, you generally wear red underwear on New Year’s. I have no idea where that tradition comes from. Maybe Catholic guilt.”

— RO B MC C AU GH E Y, NAT IO NAL BUSI N ESS- D EVEL O PME NT MANAGE R F O R SP I R IT S, WINE AND SPIR IT S E DU C AT IO N T R U ST

“Pitorro is traditionally illegal because it’s homemade rum that you bury underground. It’s like Caribbean moonshine, I guess. What you do is infuse it with fruits; the traditional one is quenepa. That’s what you drink on New Year’s Eve, it’s like a shot.

Each household or family has a different recipe. Most families will have a combination of fruits, and they’ll be really proud of showing off their own [recipe].”

“I’m from the eastern part [of France] near Strasbourg. We used to eat a little a bit late, at 9 or 10 p.m. So we have a kind of aperitif with the family. We used to make a salmon toast, foie gras toast, small quiches with eggs and roe. We enjoy that with a glass of aperitif, Champagne, Pernod or maybe whiskey. Then, in my family we used to have oysters, clams or raw shellfish, and then good pieces of meat like filet mignon. We have a break and a granité between courses.

Then we have fish, normally salmon, maybe stuffed mussels with butter with parsley, garlic, and you eat that with a brioche. Dessert is maybe a Yule log or macarons, but we need a break so we would watch a movie. We wait until it is midnight and kiss each other and maybe drink some Champagne.”

— JA M ILK A BO RG ES, E XE C UTIVE C HEF, SP O O N

— DAVID PIQUARD, PASTRY CHEF/CO -O WNE R , GAB Y E T JU L E S

— R ON C A S E R TA NO, DI RECTO R AT C ON S U M E R FR E S H PR ODUC E WI NEMAKERS

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AUTHENTIC & FRESH

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MEXICAN RESTAURANT AND BAR

IN THE STRIP DISTRICT

LADIES NIGHT

EVERY WEDNESDAY ALL DAY

10 SHAKER MARGARITA & ½ HALF OFF COCKTAILS 4-7PM $

BOOZE BATTLES {BY CELINE ROBERTS}

Each week, we order the same cocktail at two different bars for a friendly head-to-head battle.

Go to the bars, taste both drinks and tell us what you like about each by tagging @pghcitypaper on Twitter or Instagram and use #CPBoozeBattles. If you want to be a part of Booze Battles, send an email to food-and-beverage writer Celine Roberts, at celine@pghcitypaper.com.

THE DRINK: GIMLETS

TORTILLAS MADE FRESH DAILY!

s VS. 2031 Penn Ave [at 21ST] 412.904.1242 @casareynamex

WE CATER!

Eddie V’s

Industry Public House

501 Grant St., Downtown

4305 Butler St., Lawrenceville

DRINK: Tokyo gimlet INGREDIENTS: Aviation gin, TY KU sake, fresh lime, yuzu, cucumber OUR TAKE: Notes of nori are present on the nose, while the cucumber cools and the black pepper adds complexity and zip.

Yuzu is refreshing and floral when combined with the sake, which adds floral perfume.

DRINK: Classic gimlet INGREDIENTS: Hendrick’s gin, lime, simple syrup, lime wheel OUR TAKE: Classic and clean with a slightly sweet edge, this cocktail is a standard for a reason. Notes of rose and cool cucumber make this drink booze-forward without being bracing.

Learn more about Pittsburgh’s food scene on our archived podcasts Sound Bite and Five Minutes in Food History online at www.pghcitypaper.com.

One Bordeaux, One Scotch, One Beer Confronto Rosso 2013, Collefrisio $15/glass “This wine is made from 50 percent Montepulciano d’Abruzzo and 50 percent Primitivo grapes. It has deep stone-fruit notes, and it’s one of our best sellers. We’re able to source it from the distributor close by in Market Square Downtown.”

RECOMMENDED BY FRANCO BRACCIA, CO-OWNER AT SENTI

Confronto Rosso 2013 is available at Senti, in Lawrenceville.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

SO MANY CARES CAN BE SHRUGGED OFF WITH A GOOD SONG-AND-DANCE NUMBER

MONEY TALKS {BY AL HOFF} The politically charged early 1970s was a fevered time of skyjackings, assorted terrorist attacks and high-profile kidnappings. One of the latter — particularly shocking at the time, and now lost to faded tabloid clippings — was the 1973 abduction in Rome of Paul Getty, an episode recounted in Ridley Scott’s All the Money in the World.

John Paul Getty (Christopher Plummer)

CP APPROVED

Sixteen-year-old Paul Getty (Charlie Plummer) is the grandson of oil tycoon John Paul Getty (Christopher Plummer, no relation), one of the world’s richest men. Successful in business, he isn’t very good at family, or at sharing the wealth — he famously had a payphone installed in his 72-room, art-filled British mansion. And when young Paul’s kidnappers demand $17 million in ransom, Getty says no.

Getty, a renowned deal-maker, elucidated that “everything has a price” and that one’s mettle was to know and stand by that measure. The price for Paul is set too high, and Getty dispatches his security man, Chase (Mark Wahlberg), to negotiate a better deal — a release “as quickly and inexpensively as possible.”

Thus Chase joins Paul’s determined mother (Michelle Williams) in a protracted battle with the kidnappers, the police and the media, all while Paul languishes.

It’s a fascinating account, solidly delivered by Scott, who mixes thriller with family melodrama and no shortage of revulsion toward men such as Getty. They are masters of the universe who are, in other aspects, tiny soulless cut-outs of human beings. If at times, the dialogue about the corrupting nature of money is too on-the-nose, well, some truths can never be repeated enough and too plainly.

While Getty was perhaps unique in his explicit choice of money over a child, a viewer is free to extrapolate to other current accounts of money vs. people.

And speaking of current events, All the Money had a flutter of early press when Getty’s original portrayer, actor Kevin Spacey, facing accusations of sexual harassment, was edited out of the film only a few weeks ago. Scott recruited Plummer for last-minute reshoots, and his turn as the quite horrible yet quite believable elder Getty is one of the film’s pleasures.

In English, and Italian, with subtitles.

On the bus: Elisa (Sally Hawkins)

CREATURE FEATURE {BY AL HOFF}

T

HIS HOLIDAY’S most romantic and life-affirming feature might be The Shape of Water, which depicts a virtually silent love affair between a cleaning woman and humanoid river monster.

Guillermo del Toro’s latest film is a hybrid combining a fairy-tale romance with a heist and a comedy. It is an homage to old-school monster movies (with a gross-out moment or two) and to classical Hollywood studio fare, with their lush musical numbers. It is also a critique of narrow-mindedness, and of those who would approach life without compassion.

It’s a combo plate of disparate ingredients that work together remarkably well.

In early-1960s Baltimore, mute Elisa (Sally Hawkins) and her longtime friend Zelda (Octavia Spencer) work as overnight janitors at a top-secret government research lab. During the day, Elisa spends time with her struggling-artist neighbor (Richard Jenkins); they watch old musicals on the TV, their feet tip-tapping out the dances on the shabby carpet.

Then one night, the lab gets two new

arrivals: the tightly wound, casually cruel agent Strickland (Michael Shannon) and his charge, a fishman (Doug Jones) nicknamed “the asset,” captured from the “South American river muck.” This asset has odd, possibly useful powers — he can breathe both in and out of water, and the Amazon natives consider him a god — and he’s immediately a Cold War pawn. (Stay tuned, there are lurking Soviets …)

THE SHAPE OF WATER DIRECTED BY: Guillermo del Toro STARRING: Sally Hawkins, Michael Shannon, Octavia Spencer, Richard Jenkins In English, and some Russian with subtitles

CP APPROVED But to lonely, sensitive Elisa, the fishman seems less fearsome than just another voiceless outsider like herself.

Using hardboiled eggs and music, she befriends him; then, learning that he is in peril, she assembles a team of sympathetic souls to free him.

In Shape, Del Toro has created a candycolored noir, illuminating a world of both magic and menace. Everything nods to classic Hollywood, while being transformed by del Toro’s affection and tweaking. The settings are just slightly too stylized, a wink at artifice (there is a perfect diner, which we learn in a meta moment is itself a construct); the villain can be vanquished; and so many cares can be shrugged off with a good song-and-dance number.

In an opening voiceover, Elisa is described as “a princess without a voice.” Like traditional fairy-tale heroines, she lives in a shabby garret and toils in drudgery; ignored by others, she nonetheless finds her prince, an ugly aquatic creature transformed by her love into her savior. This all works because the excellent cast plays it straight and with heart; only Shannon is over the top, but fairy-tale villains are allowed a measure of theatrical awfulness. Particularly marvelous is Hawkins, who without a word, can bring us into this charmed space and make us feel her profound longing for an equally voiceless “monster.”

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The Tribes of Palos Verdes

FILM CAPSULES CP

= CITY PAPER APPROVED

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THE TRIBES OF PALOS VERDES. A move from Michigan to tony Palos Verdes, Calif., is the catalyst for a family breaking apart, in Brendan and Emmett Malloy’s drama. Palos Verdes may jut into the crashing Pacific Ocean, but it’s a homogenous place, dotted with Spanish-tile-roofed mansions and inhabited by beautiful homogenous wealthy people. Dad (Justin Kirk) loves it — so much so that he takes up with a local real-estate agent, sending his depressive wife (Jennifer Garner) into a downward spiral. The kids — 16-year-old twins — adapt as best they can; popular Jim (Cody Fern) finds solace with a drug-taking crew, while quieter Medina (Maika Monroe) takes up surfing. Things get worse, in ways that are predictable, but the film 12/19/17 1:59 PM unfolds so languidly that it ultimately feels more sad than melodramatic. We see it all through Medina’s eyes, which are soon enough turned away from the overbearing social structures of Palos Verdes, and toward whatever other wilder, freer worlds exist beyond the ocean. Starts Fri., Dec. 29.

Harris (Al Hoff) YOUTH. Xiaogang Feng’s drama is set in the 1970s, and looks at the lives of several members of China’s Military Cultural Troupe. In Mandarin, with subtitles.

Starts Dec. 29. Regent Square

REPERTORY ALIEN. H.R. Giger’s monster and set designs are still the most impressive aspect of Ridley Scott’s 1979 outer-space horror show. With only the barest of ’70s-style conspiracy subplots, the film is as lean and mean as its titular critter (though not nearly as slimy): Spaceship has monster on board; kill monster before it kills you. Scott engineers a series of differently calibrated scares, culminating in a cunningly contrived final confrontation with heroby-default Sigourney Weaver. Still, the thin characterizations and thinner story wouldn’t amount to much without the dazzling design work. That’s especially true of Giger’s biological-mechanical creature, a walking nightmare if there ever was one on film. Dec. 27-30 and Jan. 1-4. Row House Cinema (Bill O’Driscoll) BRINGING UP BABY. Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant star in Howard Hawks’ classic 1938 screwball romance. She’s a madcap heiress, and he’s a stuffed shirt of a paleontologist. There’s her pet leopard, another big cat on the loose, an important bone that’s gone missing — and no end of delightful confusion designed to bring two mismatched souls to the altar.

Dec. 27-30 and Jan. 1-4. Row House Cinema

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

THE IRON GIANT. While kids will dig this sweet story about a giant robot from the sky, there’s plenty for the adults to enjoy in Brad Bird’s 1999 animated feature based on a tale from the late poet Ted Hughes. The iron man — who is probably a gigantic defense system from outer space — doesn’t just touch down in Maine; he lands smack-dab in the middle of the Cold War, and all its attendant weapons hysteria and “normalizing” activities. The big guy is befriended and sheltered by a couple of town weirdos — a geeky boy and a beatnik — who humanize the towering hunk of metal. For kids, it’s a simple tale of redeeming friendship; for grown-ups, some trenchant commentary on weapons disarmament, though I suspect even jaded adults will mist up when the giant makes his dramatic sacrifice. Dec. 27-30 and Jan. 1-4. Row House Cinema (AH) INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS. Quentin Tarantino’s 2009 film follows a group of American soldiers during World War II as they hunt down Nazis.

Dec. 27-30 and Jan. 1-4. Row House Cinema HEAVY METAL. This 1981 anthology pairs rock music, animation and the sensibility of its sex-andsci-fi-and-comics magazine namesake, in a trippy batch of short films. Midnight, Sat., Dec. 30. Row House Cinema WHEN HARRY MET SALLY. Rob Reiner’s 1989 film starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal as soulmates who don’t quite connect (yet) is the rare romantic comedy that (1) works; and (2) was arguably elevated to neo-classic status by one deadpan line uttered by the director’s mother. 11 a.m. Sun., Dec. 31. Hollywood PITTSBURGH’S PRETTY KITTIES. Area cats do cute and funny things! Enjoy this locally sourced supersized cat video, compiled this year from short videos submitted by the public. Noon, 1, 3, 4:30, 6 and 7:30 p.m. Sun., Dec. 31. Row House Cinema BEST OF FILM KITCHEN. Screening in conjunction with First Night, this continuous program highlights some of the local short films and videos from the monthly Film Kitchen series, including: “Crawler” (time-lapse footage of mushrooms growing); Emmett Frisbee’s “Metamorphosis,” a tribute to clown artist Betty Hollingsworth; the familial tribute “My Grampa’s Garage”; “Pittsburgh Winter,” first-place winner of the 2014 Film Kitchen contest; and a Super 8 tribute to the late, lamented video-rental store Dreaming Ant. 9 p.m.-midnight. Sun., Dec. 31.

Harris. Free

HISTORY LESSONS

DAN ROONEY WAS A GREAT OWNER AND MADE A DIFFERENCE IN THE NFL AND THE CITY

This week in Pittsburgh Sports History {BY CHARLIE DEITCH} DEC. 28, 2003 Baltimore Ravens running back Jamal Lewis has a chance to break the NFL’s single-season rushing record.

However, the Pittsburgh Steelers ruin his day, stopping him 39 yards short.

{CP PHOTO BY

JAKE

James Conner MYSLIWCZYK} at training camp his first Steelers this summer

DEC. 29, 1956 Georgia Tech beats Pitt 21-14 in the Gator Bowl.

DEC. 29, 1974 The Pittsburgh Steelers are going to their first Super Bowl after a 24-13 win over the Oakland Raiders. The Steel Curtain defense allows just 29 yards rushing, and Jack Ham has two interceptions.

DEC. 31, 1972 It’s one of the most somber days in the city’s history when Pittsburgh Pirates right fielder Roberto Clemente dies in a plane crash while taking supplies to earthquake victims in Nicaragua.

Charles Fremont West

DEC. 30, 1977 Three Rivers Stadium is the third-best revenuegenerating concert venue in the country, according to Billboard magazine.

The Civic Arena is ninth.

O {CP PHOT

JAN. 1, 1934 The Duquesne Dukes win their firstever bowl game, the Festival of Palms Bowl (later renamed the Orange Bowl) with a 33-7 win over the Miami Hurricanes. On the same day in 1937, the Dukes would win the Orange Bowl, 13-12 over Mississippi.

JAN. 1, 1938 Carnegie Tech falls in the Sugar Bowl, 15-7 to TCU.

JAN. 2, 1922 The Washington & Jefferson Presidents battle the California Golden Bears to a 0-0 tie in an historic Rose Bowl. First, W&J is the smallest school to ever play in the game. Presidents quarterback Charles Fremont West is the first African-American to play in the Rose Bowl. And Herb Kopf of W&J is the first freshman.

MILLER}

second ng the Pens y Cup duri p victory parade. le an St e by holds th nsecutive Stanley Cu Sidney cros co

FINAL SCORE

DEC. 31, 1988 Penguins captain Mario Lemieux becomes the first player ever to score five ways in a single hockey game — even strength, power play, short-handed, empty net and penalty shot. He also got his third hat trick of the season in the 8-6 win over the New Jersey Devils.

BY JORDAN

I

N PITTSBURGH, sports of all types make

headlines every day. Here’s a quick look at some of the stories we remember most, in random order.

Tough love It was fitting that 2017 started off with an old rivalry that hasn’t really been a true rivalry in what seems like forever. On New Year’s Day, Steelers backup players (the team had already made the playoffs) took on a Cleveland Browns squad led by Robert Griffin III and Jeannette High School standout Terrelle Pryor. In a normal situation, any team’s reserves are likely to lose to another team’s first string. As it turns out, the Steelers came back to tie the Browns before beating them in overtime. It was the end of a season that Cleveland fans and players were glad was over. Cleveland finished 1-15, and the team’s owner, Jimmy Haslam, addressed the media at Heinz Field

afterward. Being here in that situation had to be a tough pill to swallow for Haslam, a longtime Steelers fan who was determined to build his franchise in the successful image of the Steelers. On that day, he realized that his team was light years away from even competing with Pittsburgh, let alone overtaking it. (Josh King)

Steelers vs. Patriots I At halftime of the 2017 AFC Championship game, the New England Patriots held a 17-9 lead over the Steelers. In the third quarter, the Patriots would score 16 points and go on to rout the Steelers 36-17. The scoreboard tally was closer than the actual game. Tom Brady threw three touchdowns to remind the Steelers that he did, in fact, own them.

The Patriots went on to win the Super Bowl, and once again Brady’s greatness overshadowed Ben Roethlisberger’s. The sad reality is that if Tom Brady weren’t in the NFL, Ben

would have had a chance to be considered the greatest QB of all time. The Patriots got the best of the Steelers in Ben’s rookie season, and got the best of Ben in what then appeared to be perhaps his last. In an interview with 93.7 The Fan in the days following, Roethlisberger wouldn’t commit to playing another down. He said he needed some time to think about his future, and that he wanted to leave the game healthy.

Luckily for Steelers fans, Ben would come to camp, but he hinted again that the 2017 season could very well be his last. (JK)

Lernerville Speedway’s 50th anniversary This racetrack in Sarver, Pa., becomes its own little community during the summer.

Drivers and fans pack the place weekly to see top-notch dirt-track racing. The track celebrated 50 years of operation in 2017 and is still going strong. (Charlie Deitch)

CDEITCH@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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FINAL SCORE, CONTINUED FROM PG. 39

Joey Porter’s run-in with police

Josh Gibson opera In April, The Summer King, an opera about the life of Negro Leagues baseball star Josh Gibson, who grew up and played in Pittsburgh, made its debut here. (CD)

In January, the Steelers linebacker coach got into a dustup with city police on the South Side. In the aftermath, local and national media reports mentioned every runin that Porter had had with the law over the years, even those irrelevant to the case at hand. What reports didn’t mention was that the arresting officer, Paul Abel, had a checkered past as well, including an intoxicated, off-duty pistol-whipping of a man Abel mistook for someone else. CP was glad to point out the hypocritical reporting. (CD)

NWHL All-Star Game In February, the biggest women’s hockey stars came to town and showed off their talents during the NWHL All-Star Game at the Penguins training facility in Cranberry Township. (CD)

James Conner signs with the Steelers

The death of Dan Rooney If Pittsburgh ever had a “royal family,” it’s probably the Rooney clan. And in April, it lost the Steelers’ patriarch and former ambassador to Ireland, Dan Rooney. The city turned out to mourn in full force at a Heinz Field memorial. He was a great owner and made a difference in the NFL and the city. As President Barack Obama said after Rooney’s death, he was a “championship-caliber good man.” (CD)

Kang show shut down The Pirates’ Jung Ho Kang had an incredible 2016 season; then the bottom fell out.

In late 2016, in his home country of Korea,

The Steelers online tribute to Dan Rooney after his passing

The toast of the Pitt Panthers in 2016 after returning to the field following cancer treatments, running back Conner was drafted by the Pittsburgh Steelers. During the preseason, his jersey became the bestselling in the NFL. (CD)

Demolition Axe retires Kang crashed the car he was driving and was charged with his third DUI in seven years. This was after Kang was accused of sexual assault in Chicago in early 2016.

This past February, Kang pled guilty to the DUI and received an eight-month suspended sentence. Although he wouldn’t serve time, the conviction kept Kang from

getting a U.S. work visa, and he missed the entire season. It’s unsure what will happen to Kang in 2018, but his baseball skills may have taken a hit. He was recently released from the Dominican Winter League due to really poor performance. (CD)

In the pro-wrestling heyday of the 1980s, Bill Eadie was a legitimate superstar as one half of the tag team Demolition. In July, he wrestled the final singles match of his career for Pittsburgh’s KSWA during its Brawl Under the Bridge, in Homestead. (CD)

80 games off

Back To Back

As if the loss of Kang weren’t enough, Pirates outfielder Starling Marte was banned for 80 games and the 2017 postseason for using performance-enhancing drugs. So before it truly got started, the Pirates’ season was over. The loss was so detrimental that it triggered negative press for the rest of the season. The Pittsburgh media, who often pull no punches, hit the Pirates harder than ever. It was a frustrating season, and as the calendar turned, fans and media got less and less patient. The club did have a few bright spots, with first baseman Josh Bell emerging as an everyday player. (JK)

The Penguins became the first team to win back-to-back Stanley Cups in 19 years. While it was a monumental feat, the Penguins expect to win championships every year. The Pens’ journey for a third cup is off to a slow start. But if it happens, it will be a major deal, especially for goalie Matt Murray, who has a real chance at NHL history as he goes for his third cup in his third year in the league. (JK)

Jameson Taillon’s cancer By many accounts, Pirates pitcher Jameson Taillon has what it takes to be a legitimate Major League ace over the course of his career. After what he’s gone through, he certainly deserves it. After Tommy John surgery in 2014, and surgery for a hernia in 2015, 2017 was to be his first full season in the majors. However, in late April, he was diagnosed with testicular cancer and underwent surgery. He was back on the mound five weeks later and finished the season. (CD)

Demitrius “Fake Pedro” Thorn’s wedding at PNC Park Is it a major story? No, but we at CP love this kid! (CD)

Ryan Shazier injured During a December game in Cincinnati, Shazier injured his spine when he attempted to tackle the Bengals’ Josh Malone. He was taken off the field and has spent several weeks in the hospital following spinalstabilization surgery. Shazier began rehab and even attended the Steelers-Patriots game a week later. (CD)

Steelers vs. Patriots II This week-15 NFL matchup was nothing like the AFC Championship game. The Steelers played with confidence and controlled much of the game. Roethlisberger had a great game, and Brady looked rattled at times. The Pats went ahead, 27-24 late in the game and the Steelers appeared to win it in the final seconds, when Big Ben hit Jesse James for a touchdown. However, thanks to the NFL’s asinine catch rule, the Steelers lost. Here’s hoping the Steelers get another shot at Brady in the playoffs. (CD) C D E I T C H @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

[THE CHEAP SEATS]

BEST AND WORSE

from Beechview who caused a ruckus on the T after the recent Steelers/Patriots game.

Local news captured a man from Beechview who got into a fight with Steelers fans after the referee-aided victory by New England.

He threw a brick at the T and unfortunately the brick — unlike Tom Brady’s footballs — hadn’t been deflated, and wound up injuring an innocent bystander.

{BY MIKE WYSOCKI} ONCE AGAIN it is time for the neveracclaimed Cheap Seats Bestie and Worstie Awards. This is the third annual installment of an awards show without the distraction of an actual ceremony, trophies, a sponsor or self-respect. All we provide is the acknowledgement that you did very well or very poorly in the past year.

Best Sports Prediction: The Cheap Seats.

In September, I predicted that the Steelers would go 13-3 on the season. Barring an upset by the Texans, that’s exactly what they are going to do.

Diaper Dandy of the Year: Eric Williams Jr. The freshman guard for the Duquesne Dukes has already earned a spot in the starting rotation. If E Dub 2, as he has just been nicknamed by me, is any indication of Keith Dambrot’s recruiting skills, Duquesne fans are in for some big celebrations in the future. Williams was born in 1999, started kindergarten in 2004, was old enough to drive in 2015, and has already found a place on an upstart college basketball team.

Worst Use of a Performance-Enhancing Drug: Starling Marte. In the past, athletes like Lance Armstrong, Roger Clemens and Alex Rodriguez actually performed better when using a banned substance.

That wasn’t the case for Marte. Statistically, it was a lateral move at best. Marte is cleaning up his act and playing winter ball this offseason to make up for the 80 games he missed in 2017 while suspended.

Best Performance of a Football Unit: The Steelers

Worst Reaction to a Cheap Seats Column: An unnamed reader who sent {CP PHOTO BY LUKE THOR TRAVIS}

Steelers vs. Browns in early 2017

Pittsburgh Pirates. At least they picked up some things of value. Nick Burdi and three Rule Five draft picks is all the Pirates have gotten for Christmas so far.

named Nashville Predators put up a little bit of a fight, but once again hundreds of thousands of Pens fans got to celebrate in the streets during the month of June.

Upset of the Year: Pitt Panthers football.

This award goes to the Panthers almost every year. The 13-9 upset at West Virginia, in 2009, and the win last year over undefeated eventual national champion Clemson were just preludes to this year’s shocker. The Miami Hurricanes came to Heinz Field overconfident in their No. 2 ranking. Freshman Kenny Pickett sent them home with a 24-14 loss and a lesson to never underestimate Pitt football.

Worst Behavior From a Sports Fan Who Lives in Pittsburgh: The idiot Patriots fan

hate mail via Twitter. Upon reading the prediction, a certain keyboard warrior thought that we had greatly underestimated the Steelers. He responded with: “just read your predictions and guess what, you are a dumb [expletive], no one can predict that [expletive] are you [expletive][expletive].

They are going undefeated. Please quit your job you stupid [expletive].”

So, that means I head into 2018 gloating with a Bestie and the moral victory of proving a moron wrong.

I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

THIS IS THE THIRD ANNUAL INSTALLMENT OF AN AWARDS SHOW WITHOUT THE DISTRACTION OF AN ACTUAL CEREMONY.

offensive line. Maurkice Pouncey, David DeCastro and Alejandro Villanueva are all going to the Pro Bowl.

The Steelers line alone had more Pro Bowlers than a lot of other teams in the NFL.

Worst Performance by a Home Team: The Pitt Panthers men’s basketball team.

In January, the Panthers suffered the indignation of the worst loss ever witnessed at the Oakland Zoo, the Fitzgerald Field House or anywhere else they have played in the past 100 years. Cheating Rick Pitino led Louisville’s team of ill-gotten recruits to a 106-51 win over Pitt.

Best Pirates Offseason Performance: Porch Pirates. Yes, those unsavory thieves who steal packages from people’s doorsteps had a better offseason than the

Worst Performance by a Sports Organization: Cleveland Browns.

Even the Washington Generals have more pride than this team. As of this writing, the Browns are 0-30 the past two seasons, a mark that has never been matched in the history of professional football. At press time, the Browns still had games remaining with the Bears and the Steelers. Even if they make it past the Bears, 1-31 is nothing to build on.

Best Performance by a Sports Organization: Pittsburgh Penguins. The back-to-back Stanley Cup champions put themselves into the record books as the first consecutive hoisters of Lord Stanley’s Cup in almost 20 years. The unfortunately

MI K E W YS OC KI IS A STA NDUP CO MED I AN. FO LLO W HI M O N TWI TTER: @I T SMIK E WYSO C K I

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

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ACROSS 1. Blue Ribbon brewery 6. Bic cap?

10. ___ Bator 14. Hare’s habitat 15. Criminal mastermind’s home 16. Factory girl?

17. Game with 54 wooden blocks 18. “The Thin Man” canine 19. ___ B’rith (Sons of the Covenant) 20. Impossible, like an upset victory 23. Canoeing site 24. Record over, say 25. Billboard or The Hollywood Reporter, e.g.

31. Surfer who got onboard in the ‘90s, likely 32. Miracle ending?

33. Swear 36. Future lawyer’s major, possibly 39. Teaching approach based on set theory 42. Place to get off: Abbr.

43. Bloomingtonto-Louisville dir.

45. Johnson of “The NBA on TNT” 46. Traditional Provençal stew 51. Squarely

53. Just read the post and comments, say 54. Squelch 60. Maker of HEMNES furniture 61. Transom’s locale 62. “Up” studio 64. ___ tide 65. Quart ending 66. Ski resort in Vermont 67. Salinger character who says “I’d be extremely flattered if you’d write a story exclusively for me sometime” 68. Prying 69. Basic belief

DOWN

22. Jeans brand marketed for young girls 25. Listeners 26. Grounded item 27. Annual hoops postseason award 28. “Ad majorem ___ gloriam” (“For the greater glory of God”) 29. “Prince Valiant” character 30. “Avatar” actress Saldana 34. Bluesman Rush 35. “Here we go!”

37. TV franchise that uses songs by The Who for their themes 38. “Lost” setting: Abbr.

1. Quick lunch 2. Kind of code 3. Google competitor 4. Beowulf, e.g.

5. Feature’s lead-ins 6. “Into the Wild” setting 7. “The Great Gatsby” setting 8. Yellow journalist Skeeter of Harry Potter 9. Kind of defense 10. In utero 11. “Dynasty” co-star 12. Certain schs.

13. Assault on the eardrums 21. “Forrest Gump” setting

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40. Jugular 41. 3-D exam 44. Woodstock organizer Tiber and namesakes 47. Already recorded 48. “Not again!”

49. Silver Slugger Huff 50. “Dude!”

51. Back line?

52. Hurls 55. “Paradise Lost” setting 56. 13-stringed Japanese zither 57. “Give me the ball!”

58. Team members 59. Receptionist’s question 63. “Bah!” {LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS}

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FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

12.27-01.03

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Hungarian psychiatrist Thomas Szasz dismissed the idea that a person should be on a quest to “find himself” or “find herself.” “The self is not something that one finds,” he said. Rather, “it is something one creates.” I think that’s great advice for you in 2018, Capricorn. There’ll be little value in wandering around in search of fantastic clues about who you were born to be. Instead you should simply be gung-ho as you shape and craft yourself into the person you want to be.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Is there anything about your attitude or your approach that is a bit immature or unripe? Have you in some way remained an amateur or apprentice when you should or could have become fully professional by now? Are you still a dabbler in a field where you could be a connoisseur or master? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, the coming months will be an excellent time to grow up, climb higher and try harder. I invite you to regard 2018 as the Year of Kicking Your Own Ass.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In 2018, one of your themes will be “secret freedom.” What does that mean? The muse who whispered this clue in my ear did not elaborate further. But based on the astrological aspects, here are several possible interpretations. 1. You may have to dig deep and be strategic to access resources that have the power to emancipate you.

2. You may be able to discover a rewarding escape and provocative deliverance that have been

hidden from you up until now. 3. You shouldn’t brag about the liberations you intend to accomplish until you have accomplished them. 4. The exact nature of the freedom that will be valuable to you might be useless or irrelevant or incomprehensible to other people.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “I need more smart allies, compassionate supporters, ethical role models and loyal friends, and I need them right now!” writes Joanna K., an Aries reader from Albuquerque, N.M. On the other hand, there’s Jacques T., an Aries reader from Montreal.

“To my amazement, I actually have much of the support and assistance I need,” he declares. “What I seem to need more of are constructive critics, fair-minded competitors with integrity, colleagues and loved ones who don’t assume that every little thing I do is perfect, and adversaries who galvanize me to get better.” I’m happy to announce, dear Aries, that in 2018 you will benefit more than usual from the influences that both Joanna and Jacques seek.

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TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the Scots language spoken in Lowland Scotland, a watergaw is a fragmented rainbow that appears between clouds. A skafer is a faint rainbow that arises behind a mist, presaging the imminent dissipation of the mist. A silk napkin is a splintered rainbow that heralds the arrival of brisk wind and rain. In accordance with the astrological omens, I propose we use these mysterious phenomena as symbols of power for you in 2018. The good fortune that comes your way will sometimes be partially veiled and seemingly incomplete. Don’t compare it to some “perfect” ideal. It’ll be more interesting and inspiring than any perfect ideal.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In 2018, half-buried residues from the past will be resurfacing as influences in your life. Old dreams that you abandoned prematurely are ripe to be re-evaluated in light of what has happened since you last took them seriously. Are these good or bad developments? It will probably depend on your ability to be charitable and expansive as you deal with them. One thing is certain: To move forward into the future, you will have to update your relationships with these residues and dreams.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

I wish I could make it nice and easy for you. I wish I could proclaim that the forces of darkness are lined up against the forces of light. I’d like to be able to advise you that the opening months of 2018 will bring you a showdown between wrong and right, between ugliness and beauty. But it just ain’t that simple. It’s more like the forces of plaid will be arrayed against the forces of paisley. The showdown will feature two equally flawed and equally appealing sources of intrigue. And so you may inquire, Libra, what is the most honorable role you can play in these matters? Should you lend your support to one side or the other? I advise you to create a third side.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

Poet Diane Ackerman tells us that human tongues, lips and genitals possess neural receptors that are ultra-responsive. Anatomists have given unsexy names to these bliss-generating parts of our bodies: Krause end bulbs, also known as bulboid corpuscles. (Couldn’t they have called them “glimmering rapture hubs” or “magic buttons”?) In any case, these sweet spots enable us to experience surpassing pleasure. According to my understanding of the astrological omens for 2018, Cancerian, your personal complement of bulboid corpuscles will be even more sensitive than usual. Here’s further good news: Your soul will also have a heightened capacity to receive and register delight.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):

Mise en place is a French term whose literal translation is “putting in place.” When used by professional chefs in a restaurant kitchen, it refers to the task of gathering and organizing all the ingredients and tools before beginning to cook. I think this is an excellent metaphor for you to emphasize throughout 2018. In every area of your life, thorough preparation will be the key to your success and fulfillment. Make sure you have everything you need before launching any new enterprise or creative effort.

Experimental composer Harry Partch played oneof-a-kind musical instruments that he made from objects like car hubcaps, gourds, aluminum ketchup bottles, and nose cones from airplanes. Collage artist Jason Mecier fashions portraits of celebrities

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LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):

In 2018, your tribe will be extra skilled at opening things that have been shut or sealed for a long time: heavy doors, treasure boxes, rich possibilities, buried secrets, shy eyes, mum mouths, guarded hearts and insular minds. You’ll have a knack for initiating new markets and clearing blocked passageways and staging grand openings. You’ll be more inclined to speak candidly and freely than any other generation of Scorpios in a long time. Getting stuck things unstuck will come naturally. Making yourself available for bighearted fun and games will be your specialty. Given these wonders, maybe you should adopt a new nickname, like Apertura (the Italian word for “opening”), Ouverture (the French word for “opening”), Šiši (Yoruban), Otevírací (Czech), Öffnung (German), or Kufungua (Swahili).

CANCER (June 21-July 22):

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):

east liberty squirrel hill north hills

using materials like noodles, pills, licorice candy, bacon and lipstick tubes. Given the astrological configurations for 2018, you could flourish by adopting a similar strategy in your own chosen field. Your most interesting successes could come from using things as they’re not “supposed” to be used. You could further your goals by mixing and matching resources in unique ways.

I predict that the coming months won’t bring you the kinds of opportunities you were imagining and expecting, but will bring you opportunities you haven’t imagined and didn’t expect. Will you be alert and receptive to these sly divergences from your master plan? If so, by September 2018 you will have become as smart a gambler as maybe you have ever been. You will be more flexible and adaptable, too, which means you’ll be better able to get what you want without breaking stuff and wreaking whirlwinds. Congratulations in advance, my daring darling. May your experiments be both visionary and practical. May your fiery intentions be both steady and fluidic.

Name 10 items you would put in a time capsule to be dug up by your descendants in 500 years. Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700

Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I have been with my unicorn boyfriend for four months. The sexual chemistry between us is out of this world! I’m a woman who’s very open-minded when it comes to trying new things: I’ve had threesomes and foursomes, tried every toy on the market, done anal sex, BDSM, and many other things. He is sexually experienced, but he’s not openminded. One thing he won’t do is kiss me after I’ve swallowed his load. We’ve been together only four months, so maybe I just need to wait and hope that he’ll come around. Or is there something I can do to get him to try it?

CAN’T UNICORN MAN UP?

If that’s the only thing he won’t do — if every toy on the market is on the table, along with threesomes, foursomes, BDSM, etc. — then he’s pretty adventurous. But if kissing after you’ve swallowed is the only mildly kinky thing you’ve attempted with him and it was a no, he may not be adventurous enough to deserve unicorn status. But I will say this in his defense …

Kissing someone who has just swallowed your load (or snowballing with someone who wants you to swallow your own load) presents a challenge for many men.

Some silly straight men worry that tasting their own come will turn them gay or make them look gay — I’ve gotten letters from girlfriends who thought their boyfriends were gay because they were too willing to kiss them after a blowjob. But there are gay men out there who don’t want to deep-kiss the guy who just blew them — and they’re obviously not worried about turning gay (already are) or seeming gay (ditto). So what gives? Blame what’s known as the “refractory period,” CUMU. Immediately after a man ejaculates, his dick starts to go soft and he loses all interest in sex — hormones have been released into his bloodstream that short-circuit sexual arousal. Bodily fluids and orifices a man was happily lapping up or at a minute ago are suddenly repulsive, not because the dude is necessarily inhibited or insecure, CUMU, but because he’s having his period — his refractory period.

anal sex. Question: HOW DO I AVOID POOP LEAKAGE?!? The first time we had anal sex, my boyfriend came in my ass and then pulled out. Then we decided to go for a run.

(We didn’t think it through, CLEARLY.) A few minutes in, I was leaking all over my pants.

In short, GROSS. Obviously it wasn’t a good idea to go for a run afterward (NOTED!), but what can I do in the future immediately after anal to avoid poopy come from leaking out of my butt?

ANAL NEWBIE AVOIDING LEAKAGE

Yeah, don’t go for a run immediately after anal.

Spend a few minutes on the toilet instead — bring your phone, post something to Instagram, let gravity do its thing. And that wasn’t poop leaking out of you on that run, ANAL, it was santorum — “the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.”

My boyfriend complains that our sex life is too vanilla. I want him to be satisfied, but he won’t tell me what else he wants to do. Recently, he suggested an open relationship. I don’t want to be in an open relationship, and I told him as much.

But I’m fully open to being more kinky or whatever else he needs. I’ve tried mixing it up, but he just looks at me strangely and asks me to stop whatever I’m doing. Can I do anything to fix this? Any insight would be appreciated.

YEAH, DON’T GO FOR A RUN IMMEDIATELY AFTER ANAL.

I’ve been seeing this guy who keeps making D/s-ish jokes and moves — he smacks my butt a lot, for example. When I let him know I like it, he’s suddenly not into it. He says it’s “disturbing” that I like what he’s been doing.

Two questions: (1) Smacking my butt is OK so long as I don’t want it? (2) Enjoying what he’s doing makes me a freak?

JOKING ABOUT CONSENSUAL KINKS

Two options: (1) He goes in for domineering head games and “playful” violence because he’s abusive and controlling. (2) He’s got kinks, but he hasn’t managed to incorporate his kinks into his sex life in a healthy, consensual manner — and now that he knows you enjoy the same things he does (but you’re healthier about them than he is), he’s projecting his self-loathing onto you. Either way, JACK, you’re going to need to DTMFA. I am a 29-year-old straight woman on the West Coast in a new relationship. My boyfriend and I have just begun exploring

I’M NOT GOOD AT ACRONYMS

He knows what he wants, and he can’t or won’t tell you. Either he can’t because he’s so sexually repressed that he’s incapable of pushing the words out of his mouth, or he won’t because his non-vanilla desires are so extreme as to be deal-breaker-level repulsive to anyone who doesn’t share them. But complaining about your sex life without elaborating or giving you any constructive feedback at all is disqualifying assholery, INGAA. You’ll also have to DTMFA. I just read your reply to a woman who wrote to you regarding her partner’s lack of libido. Although I found the article somewhat interesting, I would have preferred that a woman who was an actual lesbian was rendering advice to other lesbians. As a man, you are not qualified to deal out sex advice to women — especially to lesbians.

STATING THIS OBVIOUS POINT

Take it away, Free Dictionary: “ad•vice: opinion about what could or should be done about a situation or problem.” The only qualification you need to give someone your opinion? Someone asked you for it. Full stop, STOP. So I’m going to continue giving advice to straight people despite not being straight, to lesbians despite not being a lesbian, to bisexuals despite not being bi, to trans people despite not being trans, to monogamous people despite not being monogamous. Hell, I sometimes give advice to Republicans despite not being a heartless idiot.

Give the gift of the magnum Savage Lovecast at savagelovecast.com!

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UNINFORMED READERS {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

LAST WEEK, City Paper named activist and police-brutality victim Leon Ford our first-ever Pittsburgher of the Year. Ford, who

was unarmed, was paralyzed after being shot by police during a routine traffic stop in 2012. The award was met with a lot of positivity. But not everyone felt that way. Below is an unedited email exchange that I had with one dissenter on Dec. 20.

From: Baseball Joe <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Wed., Dec. 20, 2017 10:36 p.m.

To: cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com Subject: pgher of year is city paper serious choosing a thug for Pittsburgher of the year he was shot by police after trying to flee let citizens of Pittsburgh choose pgher of year seems like city paper is so black oriented blacks comprise only about 28% of the city and only about 9% of the tri-state area paper needs to focus more on MAJORITY, NOT MINORITY sad that pgh seems to be on same path as Detroit From: Charlie Deitch <cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com> To: ‘Baseball Joe’ <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 10:03 a.m.

Subject: pgher of year Hi Joe, Thanks for writing. You’ve probably heard this before but you’re a racist. You sir, are what’s wrong in this city. An Attitude like yours is the reason that white police officers couldn’t believe that Leon Ford, a black man, wasn’t a criminal, a “thug” or a person of interest in something illegal despite a mountain of evidence to the contrary. They are the reason that Leon Ford is paralyzed and confined to a wheel chair. And people like you and your inability to see injustice is the reason that it will, unfortunately, happen again to someone else.

Happy Holidays, Charlie Deitch From: Baseball Joe <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 10:24 a.m.

To: cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com Subject: pgher of year a racist is someone who hates EVERYONE of a certain race ANYONE can be a racist-black, white, Asian, Hispanic there are MANY fine blacks and I have some black friends there are such racial DOUBLE STANDARDS in this country blacks can say or do basically anything they want and are called ACTIVISTS while whites say anything remotely racial, they are called RACISTS WHY is MLK the ONLY AMERICAN to have his own NATIONAL holiday while Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, FDR and others DO NOT have their own national holiday MLK day should be replaced by A GREAT AMERICANS DAY. so everyone can honor whatever great American they wish If Leon Ford didn’t do anything wrong, why did he run from police if he would not sped away he would not have been shot EVERY TIME a black gets injured or killed there is such outrage but whenever a black kills a police officer where is all the outrage TELL ME WHY after JFK and RFK were assassinated there was no outage but after MLK was assassinated there were MASSIVE RIOTS MEDIA NEEDS TO TELL both sides OF AN ISSUE

From: Charlie Deitch <cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com> To: ‘Baseball Joe’ <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 12:24 p.m.

Subject: pgher of year Hi Joe, Actually, I’ve found that when somebody claims they’re not racist by claiming to have black friends, they’re racist. Because this might be difficult to understand, below is a translation in the language of one of America’s great white philosophers, Jeff Foxworthy: “If someone calls you a racist and you say you can’t be a racist because you have black friends, yooooou might be a racist.”

From: Baseball Joe <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 12:31 p.m.

To: cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com Subject: pgher of year SUCH STUPIDITY whats your view about replacing MLK Day with GREAT AMERICANS DAY NO ONE should object to that give EVERYONE a choice on what great American they choose to honor From: Charlie Deitch <cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com> To: ‘Baseball Joe’ <REDACTED@aol.com> Sent: Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 1:01 p.m.

Subject: pgher of year Well, my view stands that you are a racist and that’s about the dumbest, most racist goddamned idea I’ve ever heard in my life. You are also ignorant and oblivious to the world around you. It’s our world, Joe, not yours. Not “Our World” in terms of race, but one belonging to people of tolerance and people who recognize that there is not equality in this world and there must be regardless of a person’s race, gender and sexual identity. But, despite your obvious hatred and bigotry, there is room for you in our world if you smarten up and instead of denying there’s a race problem in America, stand up and do something about it. You need to be able to see that police officers aren’t always right and sometimes bring situations on themselves. They stopped Leon Ford for a moving violation and then spent the next 15 minutes convincing themselves that every fact in front of them was a lie and that Leon Ford was someone else. I can’t imagine what Ford felt sitting in that car for that amount of time. Neither can you.

And you and I might not feel uncomfortable because we’re white men and aren’t subject to the same kind of nonsense that black men are on a daily basis by police. If history in these types of situations has taught us nothing else, it’s that unarmed black men die at the hands of police every year. He was 19. He got scared because he knows what happens to men like him. He knew what happened when white police officers decide that someone who is innocent must be guilty of something. I’m white and I will not sit here and pretend to know what that feels like. But I recognize it’s a major problem and needs fixed. You won’t even acknowledge it’s a possibility. You’re what’s wrong with America, Joe. People like you are the reason that Pittsburgh is identified as a racist city by a lot of people. I’m not going to argue with you anymore because I’m never going to get through to you. But I’ll leave you with one final observation.

I noticed that you’re still using an AOL account, maybe switch to Gmail; you need to bring your email and your asinine views on race out of the 20th Century.

Charlie Deitch

46

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.27.2017/01.03.2018

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