July 18, 2018 - Pittsburgh City Paper by Pittsburgh City Paper

PITTSBURGH’S ALTERNATIVE FOR ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT SINCE 1991

JULY 18-25, 2018

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GAB BONESSO’S COLUMN DEBUTS PG 10

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EVENTS 7.20 – 10am TEACHER WORKSHOP: ADMAN: WARHOL BEFORE POP Tickets $30 (includes museum admission, materials, private tour of exhibition) Registration required

7.28 – 3pm DANDY ANDY: WARHOL’S QUEER HISTORY Free with museum admission

8.4 – 10am -5pm ANDY’S 90TH BIRTHDAY PARTY Celebrate the 90th anniversary of Andy Warhol’s birth with family-friendly activities throughout the museum. Free with museum admission

8.15 – 10am HALF-PINT PRINTS The Factory Silkscreen printing activity for children ages 1 to 4 years old. Free with museum admission

Andy was always one step ahead.

: April 27 - September 2 This exhibition was developed collaboratively by The Andy Warhol Museum and the Art Gallery of New South Wales, Sydney.

Image: Getty Images, Women trying on shoes for a wedding.

The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

650 Smithfield Street, Suite 2200 / Pittsburgh, PA 15222 412.316.3342 / FAX: 412.316.3388 / E-MAIL info@pghcitypaper.com

EDITORIAL Editor ROB ROSSI Managing Editor LISA CUNNINGHAM Associate Editor ALEX GORDON Senior Writer RYAN DETO Arts Writer HANNAH LYNN Photographer/Videographer JARED WICKERHAM Featured Contributors GAB BONESSO, ADAM CROWLEY, TERENEH IDIA Interns ANNIE BREWER, ALEX MCCANN, LAUREN ORTEGO

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JULY 18-25, 2018 // VOLUME 28 + ISSUE 29

INSIDE THIS ISSUE:

ART Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Graphic Designers MAYA PUSKARIC, JEFF SCHRECKENGOST

Main Feature 06 Food+Drink 12 Arts+Entertainment 17 Calendar 31

ADVERTISING Associate Publisher JUSTIN MATASE Digital Development Manager RYAN CROYLE Advertising Representatives BLAKE LEWIS, KAITLIN OLIVER Marketing and Sales Assistant CONNOR MARSHMAN National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

ADMINISTRATION Office Coordinator MAGGIE WEAVER Circulation Manager JEFF ENGBARTH Office Administrator RODNEY REGAN

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Featuring “Summer in the City”: a photo essay from Instagram collective SteelCityGrammers, at pghcitypaper.com COVER P H OTO B Y @F E AT H E R INT H E WIL D // PH OTO AB OV E B Y @K R IST E N_ IN_ PGH

Jen Sorensen 9 Free Will Astrology 30 Crossword 37 Savage Love 38

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

Katharine Eagan Kelleman CP PHOTOS BY JARED WICKERHAM

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.TRANSIT.

ALL THE SMALL THINGS

Port Authority’s new CEO isn’t chasing robots to improve public transit BY RYAN DETO // RYANDETO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

RIVERLESS CARS ARE on a lot of people’s minds.

Autonomous vehicles are often spotted on Pittsburgh streets. And the Port Authority’s new CEO knows all about robots on the road. In fact, Katharine Eagan Kelleman was a driving force behind an autonomous-shuttle pilot program when leading the transit agency for Hillsborough County, Fla. But what happened in Tampa won’t fuel Kelleman in Pittsburgh, so don’t expect a similar program while she is running the Port Authority. She says Allegheny County is a “great, traditional public-transit county” and does not need big technology for improvements because of the large population of riders that are already dedicated to transit.

to the South Hills Village station, then taking light-rail the rest of the way. During a 30-minute bus ride to and from Fineview and Downtown, she repeatedly mentions “riders” and “better” when speaking about Port Authority. She talks with conviction, underlining that a ridership increase in Allegheny County cannot happen until service improves for riders. Her tactics are garnering attention. Praise for Kelleman has come from public-transit advocates and skeptics. However, reality might prove a tougher opponent than critics. From 2016 to 2017, ridership dropped by 1.2 percent in urbanized sections of the region. And transit ridership is decreasing nationwide. But Kelleman believes Pittsburgh’s slight dip can be

“IT HAS BEEN GOOD TO SEE HER RESPOND TO THE NEEDS OF RIDERS. WE ARE HOPEFUL THAT WILL CONTINUE.” “I have experience in a city and state that is sprawly,” Kelleman says. “I understand why at places like that there is so much more desire to use ride hail and embrace the cool, the new and the neat. “That is not the reality in Allegheny County.” In her short time as CEO, Kelleman has prioritized a new vision for Port Authority: make trips better and more efﬁcient for existing riders. KELLEMAN UNDERSTANDS riders because she is a rider. She

commutes to her Downtown ofﬁce by driving a few minutes

overcome. “We have this pent-up demand,” she says. Her optimism comes from experience. Previous Port Authority leaders tended to have more local civic or business experience than transit expertise, but Kelleman has been working in public transit since age 24. Pittsburgh is the latest stop on road that has taken her to Dallas, Baltimore and Tampa. She’s also a bit of transit nerd. While riding the 11 bus during this interview, Kelleman speaks about her time analyzing bus-stop locations and points out the correct distance a Downtown bus stop should be from the intersection.

CONTINUES ON PG. 8

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

ALL THE SMALL THINGS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 7

She mentions public-transit consultant Jarrett Walker, a bit of an icon in her world. Walker has helped redesign bus networks in Seattle and Houston. Those cities have bucked the national trend and gained transit riders. Kelleman wants similar results for Pittsburgh and Allegheny County. She is targeting service improvements such as consolidating bus stops and all-door boarding for the P1 route. She wants to beautify the region’s most used bus stops

and renew focus on a marketing plan. As she sees it, Port Authority needs to remind residents of the good transit that already exists. She mentions the speed and efficiency busway riders enjoy. A P1 bus trip from Wilkinsburg to Downtown takes about 15 minutes, while driving takes about 20. Kelleman hopes to make changes that will lead to more efficient bus trips for all riders. To get the word out about these benefits, Port Authority’s board approved

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a $441-million budget that added 40 new positions at a $22-million expense. Jake Haulk, who presides over the conservative Allegheny Institute for Public Policy, is a longstanding critic of Port Authority. He disagrees with a budget increase, an opposing view consistent with his concern about costs associated with running the agency. Still, even Haulk is hearing something he likes from Kelleman. “I would applaud route consolidation,”

Haulk says. “There has to be efﬁciency measures completed at the Port Authority.” BUCKING THE historical culture of the Port

Authority appears to be Kelleman’s style. When the last Port Authority CEO was let go, some Port Authority board members weren’t informed until the night before they were set to vote. Causes championed by the previous leadership have been rejected by Kelleman. After public outcry over the

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proposed Bus Rapid Transit line cutting Mon Valley service, she halted changes. When advocates voiced concerns about armed police monitoring fares on light-rail cars, Kelleman stopped that proposal, too. Her rhetoric on transit even differs from local political leaders. While Mayor Bill Peduto frequently tweets about a hyperloop and Allegheny County Executive Rich Fitzgerald champions for highway expansions, Kelleman is all about buses. Since starting in January, Kelleman has upped the agency’s transparency by directly communicating with riders on social media and in person during her commute. She says “people that ride in McKeesport want good, reliable public transit,” and in talking with them, Kelleman says riders never mention autonomous vehicles or other technological advances. She takes that omission seriously. “You can put in another subway line,” she says. “But nearly 200,000 are using our busses and existing network daily. “The original ride share was the big bus that went from dense destination to other dense destinations. People are

going to grocery stores and churches on our busses. We have to remember that.” This doesn’t mean that Kelleman is opposed to new technology in transit. She is open to Pittsburgh’s tech sector providing improvements. Automatic stopping and blind-spot assistance comes to her mind, as does any advance that eases a driver’s job. But she does not wish to replace humans as bus drivers or lightrail operators. This is good news for public-transit advocates. “We are cautiously optimistic,” says Laura Wiens, director of Pittsburghers for Public Transit. “It has been good to see her respond to the needs of riders. We are hopeful that will continue.” Kelleman says transit is a “human and civil right,” echoing messaging of transit advocates such as Wiens. The future of Pittsburgh’s transit is not what a casual observer might think now that Kelleman is in charge of Port Authority. Expect attractive bus stops, fewer confusing routes, and more frequent service. “Small things that add up to a better agency,” Kelleman says. And no robots.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

PHOTO COURTESY OF NEAL ROSENBLAT

Gab Bonesso

.GABBY NORMAL.

NORMAL, YOU SAY? BY GAB BONESSO // GAB@GABBONESSO.COM

REOCCURRING THEME in my therapy sessions of late has been normalcy. I should note that I’m the patient in these sessions, not the therapist. I’m also the one fixated with the idea of being normal, which my therapist argues doesn’t exist. I understand what she’s saying; after all, I was raised an existentialist. However, if I’m being a literalist, normal most certainly exists. Merriam-Webster offers a definition: “Conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern. Ex: Normal working hours, he had a normal childhood, the effect of normal aging.” These are all examples that I defy. As a full-time children’s performer and late-night comic, my working hours are far from normal. I definitely didn’t have a normal childhood (wait for future columns or come see me perform standup comedy). Plus, my parents and my one brother all died prematurely, which sure sounds like the opposite of normal aging. Another definition from MerriamWebster reads: “Free from mental illness.” Umm, no offense to my therapist, but she and I are both fully aware that I’m a manic depressive. That’s why my insurance covers our visits. How can she argue with me when I pine to be normal? I just want to know what it’s like to subscribe to the New York Times and not MAD Magazine. I want to know what it’s like to sleep in a queen-size bed and not a blanket-fort. I want to talk on the phone and not to myself. I just want to know what it’s like to be normal for one day. I wish it could be like one of those movies from the 1990s with Judge Reinhold, but instead of switching ages, I could switch from abnormal to normal. How cool would that be? I’d be dressed in LuLuLemon, pushing a stroller, listening to NPR on my Beats by Dre while hydrating with coconut water on my way to a Pure Barre class. Instead, I’m dressed in a shark onesie wearing a red Kool-Aid mustache, arguing on Twitter why Michelangelo is by far the best Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Also, I still think it’s possible for me and Fred Savage to get married and live in a treehouse. These are some examples that I give my therapist when she pulls a Miguel and asks, “What’s normal anyway?” It’s not me, girl. It’s not me.

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE TO SLEEP IN A QUEEN-SIZE BED AND NOT A BLANKET-FORT.

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Gab Bonesso is a featured contributor. Find her performance schedule at gabbonesso.com

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t c e f r e p e h t k Pic . s s a p y t i r o h t u A Port

What pass is best for you? In for the long run. Annual Pass- Best value if you ride frequently all year long. Price includes a full year of unlimited rides. Pay for the first 11 monthsâ&#x20AC;&#x201C; the 12th month is free. Cost: $1,072.50

Take 10. Ten-Trip Pass*- So, you plan to ride but donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know exactly when. No problem. The ten-trip pass gives you the flexibility to use according to your unpredictable schedule. Cost: $25.00

Everyday commuter? Monthly Pass- The next best option, if you prefer to pay each month instead. Receive unlimited rides, just not the free month. Valid for a calendar month beginning with the first day and ending on the last. Well worth it if you intend to ride at least 20 days per month. Cost: $97.50

Forget Cash. Stored Cash Value- Provides the same flexibility as a ten-trip pass and will save you from paying an extra $.25 if you use cash. Stored cash value is required in order to purchase a $1 electronic transfer. Cost: Load any value up to $200

Taking it one week at a time. Weekly PassA good short-term option if you plan to ride often throughout a specific week. Receive unlimited rides for a calendar week Sunday through Saturday. Cost: $25.00

Taking it day by day. Day Pass*- Your best option for unlimited rides for one service day. The pass is valid from first tap on a farebox to the end of Port Authority service that same day. Cost: $7.00 Passes are available on a Connectix, the paper version of an electronic smart card, and can be purchased at any ConnectCard Vending Machine.

One day at a time. Single Trip Pass/Single Trip Pass with Transfer- A great option for occasional riders and visitors. Perfect if you just need a one-way ride to or from an event or want to see Downtown Pittsburgh at night from the Monongahela Incline. Cost: $2.50/$3.50

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

FOOD+DRINK

CP ILLUSTRATION BY NATHAN MAZUR

.RESTAURANT REVIEW.

HOUSE OF LIES

With or without a ‘b,’ IHOP doesn’t grade much better than a ‘C’ when it comes to hamburgers BY HANNAH LYNN // HLYNN@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

N JUNE 4, breakfast chain IHOP went public with an identity crisis and name change to IHOb. The world waited with bated breath, wondering what the old International House of Pancake’s new last letter would stand for. Many people guessed “breakfast” or “bacon,” both logical successors. I was hoping for “blood.” One week later, IHOb ﬁnally revealed that “b” stood for “burgers,” and the world said, “Shut up you dumb corporate b*tch.” This IHOb scheme was pretty obviously a marketing ploy, partly because the major change was announced so casually and partly because the new logo looked like your mom’s favorite tampon brand. The schtick went on for a full month before the company announced its pivot back to pancakes and the original name, tweeting: “We’d never turn our backs on pancakes (except that time we faked it to promote our new burgers).”

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LET ’S GET

S CIAL CP PHOTOS BY HANNAH LYNN

^ The burger

Even though the main IHOb promotion ended, the restaurant is still serving the burgers. So, I took an hour-long bus ride to eat them last Wednesday. For journalism. 5:15 p.m.: I left City Paper’s Downtown ofﬁce and caught a 61C to the Waterfront. The bus was warm, only made warmer by how many people were aboard. It smelled vaguely like bacon. We didn’t pass through Oakland until 5:50 p.m. I wasn’t hungry when I left the ofﬁce, but at that rate, I assumed I would be ravenous by the time we arrived. 6:04 p.m.: The bus pulled through Oakland. I started to wonder if that bacon smell was just the scent of sweat fermenting on a crowded summer bus. My bus/dining partner and I looked at IHOP’s burger menu on our phones.

)ROORZ XV WR ƓQG RXW ZKDWōV KDSSHQLQJ @PGHCITYPAPER Ř FACEBOOK.COM/PITTSBURGHCITYPAPER

^ The pancake

We got our menus and ﬂipped straight to the burgers, which were advertised as “ultimate steakburgers.” I have no idea what “steakburger” means, but it presumably implies

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT “STEAKBURGER” MEANS, BUT IT PRESUMABLY IMPLIES SLIGHTLY FANCIER THAN REGULAR OLD HAMBURGERS. 6:20 p.m.: We ﬁnally arrived at IHOP. The outside of the building looked new, and it was decorated like a modern ski lodge. Inside, there were four or ﬁve occupied tables. No one appeared to be eating burgers.

slightly fancier than regular old hamburgers. There were eight options, including something called “mega monster.” The only reference to the name IHOb was a burger ad on the condiment holder. CONTINUES ON PG. 14

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

HOUSE OF LIES, CONTINUED FROM PG. 13

enjoyed them more if I was an 8-year-old. Or stoned. I gave up on the burger, which was now too difﬁcult to eat and started to feel like hardened putty in my stomach. The fries were still good. I asked our waiter if he eats the burgers. He said “all the time.” If I ate them all the time, I would also be napping all the time. He also noted that IHOP has always served hamburgers, just not ones quite as elaborate. Maybe that’s where the “steakburger” comes into play.

6:27 p.m.: I ordered the Big Brunch burger, which came with bacon, a fried egg, hash browns, cheese and something called “IHOP sauce.” Instead of fries on the side, I ordered pancakes. For journalism. My dining partner got the Cowboy BBQ burger, which was topped with onion rings, bacon, lettuce, tomato, and barbecue sauce. Its description read: “This may be how the West won.” 7:03 p.m.: The food finally arrived. (Only three people seemed to work there.) They gave me fries and pancakes. Both burgers were too tall to fit in a human mouth, but I think that’s just where we’re at with burgers in 2018. The fries were surprisingly good, with a seasoning that loosely reminded me of Old Bay. Upon first taste, the Big Brunch burger was not bad. The potatoes were crunchy, the bacon was tasty, and the burger was there. The Cowboy burger was okay, but not great. The onion rings were simply too tall, and the barbecue sauce was far too sweet. Both burgers had buns that were golden and glistening, almost disturbingly so. My partner noted the burgers were “busy enough that I didn’t pay attention to the meat itself.” Halfway through eating, my bun couldn’t handle the busyness of all the ingredients. The weak and soggy bottom broke like a dam, and I had to use a knife and fork. The pancakes — plain with butter and syrup — were underwhelming for a restaurant that has specialized in pancakes for 60 years. They were thick. The browned outer layer was not dissimilar to a sausage casing. They were fine, but I would’ve probably

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7:35 p.m.: We ﬁnally left, and I felt ready to lie down and hold my belly like a cartoon bear who got into too much honey. I don’t generally eat hamburgers. If I did, IHOP is not where I would go. It was not as good as the cheeseburger I recently ate from Page Dairy Mart, and also probably not as good as Wendy’s.

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BAMELA’S DINER Try the famous crebe-style bancakes.

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BORK AND PEANS What else can I say?

PURGATORY It’s known for its milkshakes, made from vanilla pean ice cream.

DINING OUT

SPONSORED LISTINGS FROM CITY PAPER ’S FINE ADVERTISERS

THIS WEEK’S FEATURED RESTAURANT

THE ALLEGHENY WINE MIXER 5326 BUTLER ST., LAWRENCEVILLE 412-252-2337 / ALLEGHENYWINEMIXER.COM Wine bar and tap room in Pittsburgh’s Lawrenceville neighborhood. Offering an eclectic list of wine by the glass or bottle, local beer, craft cocktails, cheese and cured meats, good times and bad art.

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BAR LOUIE

330 N. SHORE DRIVE, NORTH SIDE (412-500-7530) AND 244 W BRIDGE ST., HOMESTEAD (412-462-6400) / BARLOUIE.COM We’re your neighborhood bar, where you can kick back and be the real you, with the help of an amazing staff, great music, handcrafted martinis and cocktails, local and regional drafts, incredible wines and a huge selection of bar bites, snacks, burgers, flatbreads and sandwiches. Come in after work, before the game, late night at night, or any time you need a quick bite or a night out with friends. Bar Louie. Less obligations. More libations.

BROAD STREET BISTRO

1025 BROAD ST., NORTH VERSAILLES 412-829-2911 / BROADSTBISTRO.COM Broad Street Bistro is a neighborhood restaurant offering daily specials. ALL food is prepared fresh and made to order. It is family friendly with a special kids’ menu.

COLONY CAFE

1125 PENN AVE., STRIP DISTRICT 412-586-4850 / COLONYCAFEPGH.COM Whether stopping in for a weekday lunch, an afternoon latte or after-work drinks with friends, Colony Cafe offers delicious house-made bistro fare in a stylish Downtown space.

FULL PINT WILD SIDE TAP ROOM 5310 BUTLER ST., LAWRENCEVILLE 412-408-3083 / FULLPINTBREWING.COM Full Pint Wild Side Taproom is Full Pint Brewing company’s Lawrenceville location and features a full service bar, huge sandwiches and half-priced happy hour. Open 4 p.m.-midnight, Mon.-Fri., and noon–midnight on Saturday. Check us out on Facebook for upcoming shows and events.

LEGENDS EATERY

500 EAST NORTH AVE., NORTH SIDE 412-321-8000 / LEGENDSEATERY.US Legends Eatery is a family owned, BYOB Italian restaurant located in the heart of Pittsburgh’s North Side. Get your family and friends together and make reservations today!

412-709-5275 LEONASPGH.COM Small batch ice cream sandwiches and pints made with local dairy and ingredients whenever possible. Available at 60 retail, restaurant and brewery locations.

MERCURIO’S ARTISAN GELATO AND NEAPOLITAN PIZZA 5523 WALNUT ST., SHADYSIDE 412-621-6220 / MERCURIOSGELATOPIZZA.COM Authentic Neapolitan pizza, artisan gelato, and an inviting atmosphere are just a small part of what helps create your experience at Mercurio’s Gelato and Pizza in Pittsburgh. It’s not your standard pizza shop; in fact, this isn’t a “pizza shop” at all.

MINEO’S PIZZA HOUSE

2128 MURRAY AVE., SQUIRREL HILL 412-521-2053 / MINEOSPIZZA.COM Mineo’s Pizza House is celebrating 60 years! Since 1958 when John Mineo opened in Squirrel Hill, we continue the family tradition of hand-grating cheese, slow simmering our sauce and making everything fresh daily.

NINE ON NINE

900 PENN AVE., DOWNTOWN 412-338-6463 / NINEONNINEPGH.COM Nine on Nine has been a popular dining venue known for serving some of the finest culinary dishes in the city since opening in 2006.

PIAZZA TALARICO

3832 PENN AVE., LAWRENCEVILLE 412-652-9426 / PIAZZATALARICO.COM Piazza Talarico and Papa Joe’s Wine Cellar is a small, family-owned restaurant and winery in Western Pennsylvania serving authentic Italian peasant food. Enjoy the fresh food on site or take out. Specializes in “Baked Maccheron”, an al forno dish of rigatoni, Grandma’s sauce, cheese, pepperoni and boiled eggs.

SAGA HIBACHI

201 SOUTH HILLS VILLAGE MALL, BETHEL PARK 412-835-8888 / SAGAHIBACHI.COM Saga in the South Hills is now under new management. Stop in for exciting table-side preparations and the famous shrimp sauce.

Or sit in the sushi-bar area for the freshest sushi experience, with both traditional preparations and contemporary variations.

SENTI RESTAURANT & WINE BAR 3473 BUTLER ST, LAWRENCEVILLE 412-586-4347 / SENTIRESTAURANT.COM Senti is a modern Italian Restaurant combining the tradition of Italian home cooking with European fine-dining. Taste different fine wines from the selfserve wine dispenser.

SPIRIT

242 51ST ST., LAWRENCEVILLE 412-586-4111 / SPIRITPGH.COM Two-level pizzeria, bar and event hall in Upper Lawrenceville located in a converted moose lodge.

SUPERIOR MOTORS

1211 BRADDOCK AVE., BRADDOCK 412-271-1022 / SUPERIORMOTORS15104.COM Thoughtfully prepared food, drawing inspiration from Braddock, its people, its history and its perseverance. The cuisine best represents the eclectic style which has become a trademark of Chef Kevin Sousa. Fine dining in an old Chevy dealership with an eclectic, farm-to-table menu and a community focus.

SUSHI FUKU

120 OAKLAND AVE., OAKLAND 412-687-3858 / SUSHIFUKU.COM Sushi should be fun and personal! Come customize your own sushi roll, burrito or bowl with our great selection of fresh ingredients!

TOTOPO MEXICAN KITCHEN AND BAR

660 WASHINGTON ROAD, MT. LEBANON 412-668-0773 / TOTOPOMEX.COM Totopo is a vibrant celebration of the culture and cuisine of Mexico, with a focus on the diverse foods served in the country. From Oaxacan tamales enveloped in banana leaves to the savory fish tacos of Baja California, you will experience the authentic flavor and freshness in every bite. We also feature a cocktail menu of tequila-based drinks to pair the perfect margarita with your meal.

Look for this symbol for Sustainable Pittsburgh Restaurants, committed to building vibrant communities and supporting environmentally responsible practices. Love Pittsburgh. Eat Sustainably. www.EatSustainably.org

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

.ON THE ROCKS.

WHY SERVICE MATTERS BY DREW CRANISKY // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

N A RECENT trip to St. Louis,

my friends and I stopped into a buzzy new restaurant for drinks and snacks. The four of us sat down at the bar, excited to be together and to be on vacation. We had read good things about the place — it was recently voted one of Bon Appétit’s best new restaurants in America. “What do you want to drink?” the bartender barked. I asked about a cocktail, and he mumbled an explanation that ended with “it’s whatever.” We ordered drinks and a few small plates, and he replied with a disdainful, “So you’re just having snacks?” He was indifferent to – even inconvenienced by – our very presence, casting a gloomy shadow over our visit. Needless to say, we didn’t get a second round. As far as service industry horror stories go, this one is quite tame. The bartender provided adequate service, in that he gave us what we ordered and kept our water glasses full. Nothing nightmarish happened. He didn’t use any racial slurs or (as far as we know) spit in our food. And yet, as we walked out into the beating St. Louis sun, I felt cheated. We go to bars and restaurants for an escape. We go because we want someone to take care of us for an hour or two, to provide us with nourishing food or a restorative drink. Though we could cook dinner or crack a beer at home, we choose to go out because we are looking for something more. And it’s up to those of us in the hospitality industry to do our best to provide it. In Setting the Table: The Transforming

PGHCITYPAPER.COM

Power of Hospitality, New York restaurateur Danny Meyer argues that serving good food is not, in fact, his top priority. “In the end, what’s most meaningful is creating positive, uplifting outcomes for human experiences and human relationships,” he writes. “Business, like life, is all about how you make people feel. It’s that simple, and it’s that hard.”

“WHAT’S MOST MEANINGFUL IS CREATING POSITIVE, UPLIFTING OUTCOMES.” I’ve now been in the service industry for most of my adult life. Here in Pittsburgh, I’ve watched new bars and restaurants open at a breakneck pace, and it’s easier than ever to ﬁnd something tasty to eat or drink. The way these new places will thrive and survive is not through ﬂashy cocktails or trendy tapas, but by focusing, as Meyer suggests, on how people feel. And though there are exceptions, I’m proud of the passion I see in the hospitality industry today. Increasingly, these jobs are treated as proper careers and not simply an easy side gig. I hope this trend continues, because providing warm service is a noble and rewarding pursuit. While I’ll forget an under seasoned salad or an overcooked burger, I’ll remember Mr. “It’s Whatever” for a long time.

•

ARTS+ENTERTAINMENT .EVENT.

PICKLE PICKS BY CP STAFF // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

HAT’S WITH this Picklesburgh?

The new editor asks a lot of questions. Lately, though, that one keeps coming up. If only there was an easy answer. The simple one is that Picklesburgh “showcases Downtown Pittsburgh’s pickled history and culinary ingenuity.” At least, that is an answer found atop the FAQ section of Picklesburgh’s official website. But the section goes on to complicate this matter — and, well, do we really need to complicate a celebration of allthings-pickle (or some-things-pickle, or even sortathings-pickle)? Nope. As has been said several times during around the City Paper office: “because pickles are awesome!” That’s “what’s with this Picklesburgh,” bossman. But don’t take our word. Head to the fourth-annual Picklesburgh, produced by the Downtown Pickle Pittsburgh Partnership, to chew on all the goodliness. We have identified a few activities that are a big, uh, dill. (By the way: the new editor wrote that line, not us.) CONTINUES ON PG. 18

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

PICKLE PICKS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 17

■

BUY IT

Lisa Cunningham: It’s easy to spot other pickle lovers while packed together on a bridge eating pickled foods and drinking pickle beers underneath a gigantic pickle balloon. But how do you tell the world that you’re a pickle fan those other 362 days of the year? You stop by Just My Art’s stand at Picklesburgh and buy pickle jewelry, that’s how. Imagine a sea of black and gold on Steelers game day and spotting the green glow of a light hitting a pickle jar necklace across the room. Or a woman tossing back her hair at Giant Eagle and revealing handcrafted pickle earrings. Quick, look in her cart. “Oh, you’re buying pickles too?” Pickle mating gold. Because seriously, who wants to be with someone who doesn’t like pickles?

■

DRINK IT

Ryan Deto: Pickles are tasty. Beer is tasty. Combining pickles and beer is freaking genius. Two regional breweries are bringing you pickle beers to Picklesburgh. Great Lakes Brewing and Southern Tier Brewing specially brewed gose-style beers — and, no, the beers aren’t actually pickled (vinegar and sugar weren’t added). Great Lakes dropped in fresh dill and bay leaves to ﬂavor its brew. Southern Tier infused its beer with peppercorns and dill. Each is a refreshing, easy drink. The brewers say these herbs mix surprisingly well with the subtle saltiness of goses. So, while cringing at the famous pickle juice chugging contest, you can actually knock back a pickle beer.

■

We picked pickle pictures from past Picklesburghs

for just the right snapshot to post on Instagram? Well, there is a giant, 35-foot long Heinz pickle balloon attached to the Roberto Clemente Bridge. This iconic, inﬂatable dill is not only hard to miss, it’s also made by the same folks who produce the famous balloons used every year in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and at Disney’s theme parks. Use it as a backdrop in your Snapchat or as a location marker when ﬁnding friends. This portly pickle presents the perfect picture to put, post and pin on every feed.

TAKE IT

Alex Gordon: Pickles, though blessed with a gnarly shelf life when jarred, do not last forever. But cheer up: Long after the pickled pierogis, pizzas, hot sauces, jams and beer of Picklesburgh are imbibed and debibed, your Pittsburgh Pottery souvenirs will remain. All the products from this local company are yellow (what you might call “Pittsburgh-bridge yellow”), adorned with a variety of Yinzerisms, and one particularly charming “Killer pierogi.” As they say: like diamonds, “yellow jagoff fridge magnets last forever.”

■

CP FILE PHOTOS

POP IT

Hannah Lynn: Eight years ago, I saw a video of Selena Gomez talking about how

■ she loves pickle juice on her popcorn — and I still remember it for no reason. She is from Texas, and apparently that’s a local treat. And I was ecstatic when I learned pickle popcorn was available up north, combining two perfect snacks into one beautiful creation. At Picklesburgh, there will be several pickle popcorns from Ekernally Yours, a popcorn shop based out of Charleroi. Flavors include creamy dill, bread and butter, pickled garlic, and a couple spicy varieties. I’m going with the garlic because I only like foods that make my breath smell terrible.

PICKLESBURGH

12-10 p.m., Fri., July 20 and Sat., July 21; 12-6 p.m., Sun., July 22. Roberto Clemente Bridge, Downtown. picklesburgh.com

PGHCITYPAPER.COM

■

HEAR IT

Alex McCann: Picklesburgh isn’t just a delight for your taste buds; 18 different bands and musicians are scheduled to perform during the three days. Artists from just about every genre are on the lineup, so be ready to hear everything from rock and R&B to hip hop and folk. Almost all of the artists set to perform are from Pittsburgh. Rock singer William Matheny has the longest journey to Picklesburgh, coming from Mannington, W. Va., Aliquippa-based roots rockers Dan Bubien & The Delta Struts will hit the stage at noon Friday to start the music, which will continue through Sunday evening.

■

SEE IT

Lauren Ortego: Have you ever found yourself enjoying Picklesburgh and looking

PADDLE IT

Jared Wickerham: Any event in Pittsburgh that can be accessed via the three rivers is absolutely my favorite kind. Picklesburgh is in the perfect location: no driving through construction, no paying outrageous prices for parking, and no sitting through Pirates traffic that will inevitably let out at the exact same time your event ends. Just steal a ride from your one friend that owns a boat or grab the nearest non-motorized floatation device and hit the water. For me, it’s an 11-foot, 4-inch standup paddle board. But canoes or kayaks are just as handy and can easily navigate the rivers even during the busiest of times. With this festival happening right on the Roberto Clemente Bridge, you can just lock your ride underneath and enjoy some pickle juice without the stress of a finding your car that has been baking under the sun in a lot.

•

2018 Neil Hamburger

.COMEDY.

HOLD THE CHEESE BY ALEX MCCANN // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

EIL HAMBURGER asks his audience members a question: Why did Colonel

Sanders keep his eleven herbs and spices a secret? “Because he was ashamed of them.” That strategy of answering simple, seemingly predictable setups with unexpected answers is central to the comedy of Hamburger and his creator Gregg Turkington. Originated to record a comedy album in the late 1990s, Hamburger evolved into an onstage persona characterized by overly gelled hair, Velma Dinkley-esque glasses and constant, phlegmy throat-clearing. He formed in Turkington’s mind as a combination of casino lounge acts and bands that perform long past their prime. Hamburger was never actually intended to become a stand-up act. Nearly 20 years after his creation, “America’s Funnyman” is still telling boorish jokes as a character who wasn’t supposed to be successful. “Why did God create Domino’s pizza?” Hamburger once quipped. “To punish mankind for his complacency in allowing the Holocaust to happen.” Don’t go to a Hamburger show and expect long, rambling stories that end with a punchline. It’s old-fashioned comedy.

NEIL HAMBURGER

WITH JP INC. AND JOHN DICK WINTERS 8 p.m. Fri., July 20. Rex Theater, 1602 E. Carson St., South Side. $20. rextheater.net

“To me, there’s a lot of comics that go out that don’t have that much material. It’s kinda just talking about themselves and maybe there’s a laugh,” Turkington says. “This is an old-school style of comedy: joke, joke, joke, joke, joke.” Many of Hamburger’s jokes follow the same formula: He poses a question to the audience, the audience asks “what?” and he delivers the answer (usually a dark or crude one). “What’s the worst thing about Fred Durst’s herpes?” he has asked. “His music.” Don’t mistake Hamburger for an anti-comedian, one who tells purposefully bad jokes intending to either draw ironic laughs or genuine boos. Though being booed is all a part of stand-up comedy, Turkington always aims for laughter. Everything Hamburger does — the grimy tuxedo, the awkward pauses, the slightly dated topics — is just a different way of getting a laugh. Just don’t heckle him. He once told a heckler, “If you have something to say about the show, go out into the street and get hit by a car!” Of course he doesn’t actually want his hecklers to throw themselves into trafﬁc. It’s all just part of the act, one in which the man in the spotlight is the only person who can see what’s coming next. “What do you get when you cross Elton John with a saber-tooth tiger? *brief pause for throat-clearing* “I don’t know, but you’d better keep it away from your ass.”

GET TICKETS NOW AT COOLTIX.COM Don’t miss Pittsburgh City Paper’s event of the year when we award the winners of BEST OF PGH 2018 ! Featuring live music, DJs, games, food sampling, drinks, and much more!

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•

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

LIVE MUSIC JULY 19

Joel Lindsey

(starting 8-9 pm)

JULY 26

Open Mic w/ Jay constable (starting 8-9 pm)

EatShady.com

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.ART.

GALLERY CRAWL BY LISA CUNNINGHAM // LCUNNING@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

T’S DIFFICULT trying to pick just one favorite piece from an art

Outdoor seating, food and drink ŸŞåÎĜ°ĬŸƉŅýåųåÚƉ°ƋƉÅŅƋĘƉĬŅÎ°ƋĜŅĹŸ

show. Art is subjective. It’s personal. Hell, if we love something, we often have no way of knowing if we’re enjoying it the way the artist intended. But I don’t think it matters, if it makes us happy. So, I checked out two local gallery shows and chose favorite pieces. The ﬁrst comes from Identity Play, a show that largely uses images from childhood to address more complicated themes and uncertainties. The second is a group gallery show from the Pittsburgh Society of Artists. This annual, non-juried “Artist’s Choice Exhibition” invited every member to submit one piece. The only theme tying everything together is these people love what they do. I wish I could have picked more than one.

•

^ At first, the feeling is joy. Memory! An extralarge version of the game you loved as a kid: 54 pairs of cards fill two walls in Memoria, matches turned right-side up on a table. You start to play. There’s an El Gallo. Where’s the second Speedy Gonzales? Then you look closer and realize the cards each represent something from Latino culture. On the unturned cards, a pattern that artist Bibiana Suárez created using names and slurs for Latinos, including the racist “wetback” and others. The fun ends. How hard is it to remember how much the Latino community has contributed to this country? The game turns into a lesson — an incredibly artistic and beautiful lesson, but a lesson, nonetheless — that’s hard to forget.

IDENTITY PLAY

Through Aug. 19. SPACE Gallery, 812 Liberty Ave., Downtown. spacepittsburgh.org

LIVE MUSIC JULY 21

JULY 28

Bill Henry

The EK Band

(12-4 pm)

BakerySocial.com

(12-4 pm)

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PGHCITYPAPER.COM

< There’s a lot of nudity in this exhibit, so the pink brushstrokes of Ann Marie’s nipples stood out, but they weren’t shocking. It was the greens and blues in the background that kept turning my head. The strokes dancing behind her as Bernie Pintar’s oil-painted lady confidently stands still. Does she not care if anyone’s looking at her? Or maybe it’s boredom? Her blue eye shadow hints that while completely nude and exposed, she has secrets still to be discovered. Added plus: The $1,000,000 price tag made me laugh.

PITTSBURGH SOCIETY OF ARTISTS ARTIST’S CHOICE EXHIBITION

11 a.m.-2 p.m., Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, or by appointment, through Aug. 3. Brew House Association Gallery, 711 S. 21st St., South Side. brewhousearts.org

Buddy Wickerham and Jena Oberg in A Streetcar Named Desire

.STAGE.

STRAIGHT AHEAD STREETCAR BY TED HOOVER // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

FADED WOMAN carrying a faded suitcase stumbles into a seedy .corner of the French Quarter and says, “They told me take a streetcar named Desire.” And with that, Tennessee Williams introduces one of the America theater’s most indelible heroines, Blanche DuBois, in his 1948 Pulitzer winning A Streetcar Named Desire — now in production at Little Lake Theatre. In that opening scene, Blanche arrives in the Quarter looking for her sister, Stella, to provide safe haven. Blanche has run out of money, options and hope, and we’re about to watch her final descent into negation. Driving her to that end is another famous Williams creation — Stanley Kowalski, Stella’s husband. While Blanche lives in a twilight world of illusion and magic, Stanley exalts in the blunt force of his own masculinity. His entrance famously finds him walking onstage carrying a package of meat. Williams pits these two in battle to a brutal finish with Stella the fulcrum; loyal and loving to her fragile sister but held in thrall by the feral Stanley. Because the original production and subsequent film featured the almost inhumanly magnetic Marlon Brando, Streetcar is sometimes thought of as Stanley’s play. But I’m happy to report that this Little Lake production is more in line with Williams’ original intent. This is Blanche’s story, and Stanley is only one of the horrors she must confront.

(Perhaps her biggest enemy is her own deteriorating mental health.) Art DeConciliis directs a foursquare, forthright and honest production. That may not sound like high praise, but DeConciliis’ goal is to stage Williams’ play, not his own “reconceived” version. It’s the current fad for directors to use a script as a jumping off point for their “vision,” but anyone who thinks they can “ﬁx” Streetcar probably shouldn’t be in theater.

A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE

Continues through July 28. Little Lake Theatre, Canonsburg. littlelaketheatre.org

Ponny Conomas Jahn begins her Blanche perhaps a little more “together” than she should, but the plus side of that is making Blanche’s fall more vertiginous and frightening. It’s impossible not to be moved by this performance. Jena Oberg is a strongly convincing Stella and her struggle between her sister and husband is powerful. Buddy Wickerham luxuriates inside the dark, primal urgency of Stanley’s interior and Gregory Caridi is poignant and sad as Mitch, the last of Blanche’s last chances. With the beauty of his work, Williams lit candles to provide solace to life’s wounded, and Blanche DuBois is one of his brightest.

•

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PHOTO COURTESY OF TIMOTHY DUFFY

Dom Flemons

.MUSIC.

RECORDING HISTORY BY HANNAH LYNN // HLYNN@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

HE COMMON IMAGE of cowboys

is usually a John Wayne-type — a handsome man with a quick draw. Or maybe it’s something based on a real-life cowboy, herding cattle in muddied boots. Regardless, the collective image is deﬁnitely white. The world typically understands American cowboys as brave (white) men conquering the Wild West and in doing so, erasing the presence of everyone who isn’t white. Folk singer Dom Flemons, who plays the Ace Hotel on Thursday, is trying to change how we see these ﬁgures with his album Black Cowboys. It’s a collection of covers and originals meant to provide a comprehensive history of the cowboy

that is missing from our lexicon. “Cowboys are one of the most enduring and prominent images in American culture, and I learned that one in four cowboys who helped settle the West were black,” says Flemons, born and raised in Phoenix. His album covers various pieces of black cowboy history, from Nat Love, an escaped slave turned cowboy, to Bass Reeves, who was the inspiration for the Lone Ranger. Black Cowboys features a version of “Home on the Range,” one of the most recognizable American cowboy songs. What’s lesser known is that the most recognizable version comes from a recording of a black cook in 1908.

DOM FLEMONS

8 p.m. Thu., July 19. Ace Hotel, 120 S. Whitfield St., East Liberty. $25-75. acehotel.com

PGHCITYPAPER.COM

Flemons also wrote three original songs for the album: “One Dollar Bill” is about Hollywood’s “sepia-toned” cowboys; “Steel Pony Blues” is about Love; and “He’s a Lone Ranger” is about Reeves. This 18-song project is not just about highlighting historical figures, but about bringing attention to the contributions of black musicians who have historically been glossed over — specifically in the realm of folk and country music. “Hank Williams learned from a man named Tee-Tot, and that’s where he got a lot of his famous sound. Bill Monroe and his brother Charlie learned from a man named Arnold Shultz,” says Flemons. The most famous white folk and country musicians were usually influenced by black musicians. Woody Guthrie and Pete Seeger learned from Lead Belly. A.P. Carter got many of The Carter Family’s most famous songs from a black man named Lesley Riddle, who saw none of

the profits or name recognition. While Flemons’ second solo album is his first project to specifically explore the history of black cowboys, he has been a leader in the folk revivalist genre since founding Carolina Chocolate Drops (along with Rhiannon Giddens) in 2005. On Black Cowboys, he uses a collection of instruments meant to evoke both the sound and feel of cowboy music, including a Gibson Hound Dog guitar, quills (a kind of pan pipe), and rib bones. The album was recorded under Smithsonian Folkways’ African American Legacy Series, which is a collaboration with the National Museum of African American History and Culture. The series features music and words from the likes of Paul Robeson and Fannie Lou Hamer. “It has a lot of legacy artists who aren’t living,” says Flemons. “I wanted to show that we’re still here.”

•

PHOTO COURTESY OF FRANK CUNNIFF

Brawl Under the Bridge

.SPORTS.

TRAMPLED UNDER FOOT BY LAUREN ORTEGO // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

NE MAN’S LOVE for comics, wrestling and all things kickass has delivered

annual ﬁghts under bridges. Brawl Under the Bridge 4 is a kid-friendly, solar-powered event intended to bring families, the craft brew scene and professional wrestling fans together to watch a bunch of dudes gracefully enter a ring and rip each other to shreds. “We thought it would be something really fun to do in Homestead,” says Frank Cunniff, an event organizer with Blue Dust. “I mean, we love pro wrestling, we’re really into solar power and this is a great community and town.” This Brawl is expected to attract up to 1,000 people, and the wide range of audience members doesn’t surprise Cunniff. It takes place under the Homestead Grays Bridge, and attendees can expect entertainment that requires parental guidance and snacking options from food trucks and brewers.

BRAWL UNDER THE BRIDGE

7 p.m., Sat., July 21. Homestead Grays Bridge, 599 W Main St., Homestead. $5. Facebook search “Brawl Under the Bridge 4”

“It’s a really great cross-section of people,” says Cunniff. “One reason [we] really spend a lot of time … getting sponsors for the event, is so we can keep the ticket price at $5.” Adding to the Brawl’s authenticity is the existence of the event’s title belt — awarded yearly to a champion who brings it the next summer. Last year’s champion, Bill Eadie (a professional wrestler who rose to fame in the 1980s as “Ax” in the Demolition tag team) was looking for a final singles match to start his retirement. He chose Brawl as his last stand. Soon after being crowned, Ax retired as planned and the title was vacated. To close out this year, the event is going extreme-rules with a nine-man ladder match. Which is exactly what it sounds like: nine wrestlers, one steel ladder and what will be a lot of gasping from the audience. “It’s pretty dangerous,” says Cunniff. “Kinda adds an extra element of highflying action, so we’re excited — it’s going to get pretty crazy with nine guys and a ladder all in the ring.” Outside the ring area will be lawn chairs for up-close viewing. Otherwise, the event is mostly of a standing-room-only variety — save for the BYOLC (that’s Bring Your Own Lawn Chair) crowd. “It’s pretty funny, a lot of action, nothing super offensive, it’s not ultra-violent,” says Cunniff. “It’s definitely an environment you can bring your family to, for sure. That’s actually what we encourage.”

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

.EVENT.

BIRD MAN BY ROB ROSSI ROBROSSI@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

HE BOY HAD no fear. He walked

into the room with those lorikeets, surehandedly took that tiny cup ﬁlled with nectar and waited for them to land on his arm and begin tasting their treat. The boy’s smile looked natural, not at all as though he was trying to show me up. But that is what it felt like. Over a year has passed since my ﬁrst adult visit to the National Aviary on the North Side. Day one was fun, but only in hindsight. As a bird-fearing journalist who had fought with Penguins (the hockey playing kind) and nervously navigated interactions with lorikeets, penguins (real ones), a toucan, a condor and a sloth, the activities forced an unscheduled call to my counselor. Talk therapy after taking time to feed a toucan — now that made sense. My being at the National Aviary made no sense. My fear of birds was real. Not exaggerated. If one landed near a tree in a yard, I stayed far away. If one was on

PHOTO COURTESY OF NATIONAL AVIARY

Editor Rob Rossi and his mother mingled with his flighty former foes in March, when the National Aviary named a barred owl “Rossi” (pictured, right) in his honor.

NIGHT IN THE TROPICS: BEACH PARTY 7-11 p.m. Sat., July 21. National Aviary, 700 Arch St., North Side. $85-150 (VIP). aviary.org/night-in-the-tropics

the street, I either stopped the car or hit the horn hoping for a sound loud enough to quake the heavens. If one was anywhere, I went anywhere else. “I’m going to turn you into a bird lover,” said Jennifer Bertetto, a former boss and a friend. She is still my friend. Though, that day in March 2017 when she assigned me to spend parts of several weeks getting up close and personal with occupants of the National Aviary, I ﬁgured our friendship’s days were numbered. “You’re going to be a bird person,” she said. “I know it.” I know this: Day One at the National Aviary was a mess of me stammering (around the sloth), ﬂinching (while feeding penguins), and wishing I had the courage of a little boy (he

PGHCITYPAPER.COM

accompanied me into the lorikeets room to “show me it’s fun”). I sweat through a couple of t-shirts, a ballcap, and … look, even the birds were grossed out. As a colleague filming it said several times to National Aviary employees: “I thought he was playing it up. But I’ve never seen him this nervous.” Nervousness carried into that evening. I slept like a baby. The next morning, I felt an odd sense of accomplishment for not having fled from the birds. As the day-after progressed, I couldn’t stop talking about my time with the birds, and it hit me: the National Aviary was changing me. It is still changing me. Visiting the National Aviary is something I now do on my own. Usually, I don’t tell anybody about a visit. Not Jenn, who is on the board. Not Robin Weber, who is senior director of marketing. Not my nephew, my goddaughter, or any of those hockeyplaying Penguins. And there is a good reason for this secrecy. I need to see the birds when I am fed up with people. The National Aviary has become my special place, its inhabitants a respite from the stressors of daily life that will transform a daily battle with adult attention deficit disorder into one that also includes taking on anxiety and depression. I cannot recall exactly when, but sometime between Day One and Week Three of visiting the National Aviary on a work assignment, the experience went from forcing a panicked call to a therapist to becoming a form of therapy. And I won’t say the National Aviary can do something similar for everybody. But the National Aviary does do it for me. Its dedicated staff, its volunteers and its animals are to whom I turn when life starts flying on me. That group includes a barred owl named “Rossi.” The National Aviary actually named a barred owl after me for helping raise awareness of its many worthy initiatives. Pretty much, there is a “Rossi” owl because I can’t stop talking about falling in love with birds. Wild, huh? This month, “Rossi” began his training to become an educational ambassador so that he can visit schools, participate in exhibits and be there to help somebody else someday fall in love with birds. The trade-off is that “Rossi” won’t be at the National Aviary for its big summer party, Night in the Tropics, on Saturday night. But I will. After all, I’m a bird person.

•

PHOTO COURTESY OF MATT POLK

Hope Anthony and Tim McGeever in The Perfect Wedding

.STAGE.

PITCH PERFECT BY TED HOOVER // INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

F NOTHING ELSE, we know the species will survive. Thanks to the Pittsburgh CLO Cabaret production of Robin Hawdon’s A Perfect Wedding, we are once again reminded that no matter the situation or the obstacles, straight people won’t stop having sex with one another. It’s the happiest day of Rachel’s life; she’s getting married to Bill and it’s a lavish affair with a huge amount of pre-planning. Little does Rachel know — but we ﬁnd out at lights up — Bill spent the night with another woman. (In the very hotel where the reception is being held. Men really are dogs, aren’t they?) Waking up in bed with a hangover and a naked woman, Bill freaks out … Rachel is on her way to the hotel to begin getting dressed for the wedding. Bill and his best man, Tom, struggle to make the hotel room respectable and woman-free. But the woman, Judy, refuses to come out of the bathroom. A hotel maid, Julie, ﬁnds herself caught in the increasingly Byzantine web of lies Tom and Bill tell Rachel (and her mother!) to explain the room, their behavior and general weirdness happening around them.

THE PERFECT WEDDING

Continues through August 12 at The Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6766 or clocabaret.com

As is standard in a farce of this nature, there are a lot of mistaken and misleading identities with competing objectives and slamming doors galore. Hawdon hasn’t really mastered the clockwork precision of a farce like, say, Noises Off, but this breezy, intermission-less 90 minutes passes by in a pleasant enough manner — thanks in large part to director Michael Barakiva’s ruthless focus on shaping the story and driving the pace. This production actually opened a few weeks ago, so this exceedingly capable cast has had the chance to find its rhythms and synchronize performances. Even the two understudies I saw blended in seamlessly. The lead character is not Bill, but Tom — and Tim McGeever seems to have been engineered for farce. His go-for-broke manner, seemingly computer-generated face and Buster-Keaton physicality centers this production, propelling it straight to the final curtain. Julianne Avolio gets to add much needed wisecreacking attitude to all this fluff as the maid Julie, while Julia Geisler and Jason Shavers (playing Judy and Bill) provide some grounding solidity. Hope Anthony does wonders with the woefully underwritten role of Rachel, and Nancy McNulty gets her laughs as the wacky mom.

Thanks for sharing, @jwilderman!

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•

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER JULY 18-25, 2018

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game that’s ﬁrst picked up in a college bar. Maybe the dartboard is nestled between a pool table and a Golden Tee Golf arcade machine. It looks easy enough, right? Throw the dart at the board and hope for a bullseye. But for many enthusiasts, darts is far more than just a pub game. Several hundred of those enthusiasts will make their way to Pittsburgh this week to take part in the American Darters Association’s annual National Championship and vie for $55,000 in prizes. Karl Remick is one of those enthusiasts, but he won’t be competing in the national championships. Nor did he start playing darts in bars. He was born into darts. Remick’s father, Glenn, founded the American Darters Association (ADA) in 1990. Prior to that, Glenn had also opened a dart supply store in Massachusetts and founded both the Western Massachusetts Darting Association and the New England Darts Tournament Organization. Karl had played “a game [of darts] here and there” with his parents growing up, but he didn’t start taking the sport seriously until college. He dropped out of St. Charles Community College in suburban St. Louis — the Remick family moved there to found the ADA — and “took more and more interest in the family business and decided to jump right in,” he says. Remick is now the ADA’s vice president, while his mother, Gloria, serves as the company’s CEO after Glenn’s death in November 2009. And though the ADA is quite literally a family affair for him, Remick’s “family” includes more than 6,000 dart fanatics from at least 30 states — plus the 50-or-so members residing overseas. From California to Maine, that family will be getting together for its annual reunion at the DoubleTree Hotel in Green Tree. Remick expects at least 500 members, players and spectators to be in attendance for ﬁve days of darts, beer and fun. The ADA National Championship

Taking aim: A scene from last year’s National Championship

moves every year — making it one of few dart associations to do so — and this is its ﬁrst time in Pittsburgh. Remick says the ADA picked Pittsburgh because it was looking for a location in the Eastern part of the country. Last year’s national championship was in the ADA’s home city of St. Louis, while the 2016 edition was held in Mesquite, Texas. The ADA is also unique by being the only American dart association that offers both traditional steel-tip and electronic soft-tip darts. Each will be played at the national championship, which unofﬁcially gets underway the day before actual events.

HE WAS BORN INTO DARTS. Every year, the ADA tries to put together an event so that soon-to-be-competitors can do something other than play darts. In previous years, darters have gone on brewery tours and attended baseball games, but this year, they’ll be touring the Three Rivers on a boat cruise. “We try to do something fun and get out to all the members before the championship starts,” Remick says. After a warmup day, the darters will spend four days trying to simultaneously throw as many darts and as few darts as possible. Confused yet? The three types of darts at the ADA National Championship are 301, 501 and Cricket. Cricket involves landing darts on certain scores. To earn points on a score,

AMERICAN DARTERS ASSOCIATION NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP

Wed., July 18 - Sun., July 22. DoubleTree Hotel, 500 Mansfield Ave., Green Tree. Free to attend. adadarters.com

a player must “open” the score by hitting it three times. (If, for example, a player was to hit the triple-20, then they would have just opened the 20 score in a single throw.) For every subsequent hit of an open score, the player scores that amount of points. A number can be “closed” if the opponent hits it three times. The game ends when all numbers in play — usually 15 through 20 plus the bullseye — have been opened or closed, and the higherscoring player wins. The other games — 301 and 501 — are practically the same, and each is far less complex than cricket. Those games involve throwing as few darts as possible to score exactly 301 or 501 points. Players must get their score to exactly zero by landing a double score; if they go below zero, to exactly one or to zero with a throw that’s not a double, they have “busted” and must try again. Thus, the strategy is simple: throw as few darts and score as many points as possible, then land a double to win. Perhaps the most popular version of darts is 50. It features the fabled “ninedart ﬁnish,” akin to a 300-point game in bowling. This notoriously tricky strategy requires the darter to throw six straight triple-20s (60 points apiece for a total of 360 points). That leaves 141 points to be scored to reach 501. If done correctly, the darter will have scored 501 points exactly in the minimum number of throws. As the darters of the ADA descend on Pittsburgh for their annual family reunion, many of the most competitive members will be looking to throw ninedart games, advance through the tournament and get their hands on the prize money. But for everyone involved, the national championship offers a chance to kick back with a cold beer, say hello to old friends and play a simple game that’s more complex than it looks.

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