The Reality of College Roommates When human beings with different traits and qualities come together under one roof, contrasting personalities can clash or compliment each other. But one thing is clear — living with a roommate is a major learning experience for all involved. “Make sure you pick people you know and trust,” Communication Professor Kenneth Waters said. “Know how to communicate so you minimize misunderstandings.” Waters said he experienced some struggles during his undergrad at Pepperdine with roommates — some of whom did not keep up their end of the chores, leaving the responsibility all to himself. “What I remember most is that one of the guys just decided he didn’t like school,” Waters said. “He just slept in and didn’t go and moved out a month later.” There are different factors that contribute to how a person acts when living with others. These include the context of the connection between roommates — partner, friend or stranger — and how an individual was raised to take care of themselves and treat others.
Learning to live with others in college Maddie Blume, a 2018 alumna, grew up as an only child. She said the transition from living by
Art by Ally Armstrong
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herself to living with others in college enhanced her communication skills. “There wasn’t one time when I felt like I didn’t get along with my roommates or feel like I didn’t have enough space,” Blume said. Blume said she believes she had a positive roommate experience because she lived with people who held similar values and social preferences. Senior Sergio Velazquez was a residential advisor in the J. Pengilly House during the 20192020 academic year until COVID-19 prompted campus to close. He helped to foster a new home to 50 male first-year students. “The first year of college, they’re learning how to be more of an adult,” Velazquez said. “They’ll get more comfortable with sharing what’s going on in their lives and be more communicative, open and vulnerable.” In most cases, Velazquez said the students accept each other as living partners and keep the relationship at that. In rare cases, a pair of roommates will end up becoming best friends.
Learning to live with a best friend Seniors Madison Menefee and Annie Vander Mey have been inseparable since sophomore year when they lived in Seaside Hall with six other suitemates. “Our core values are the same, like being Christians [and] loving God, and we have the same friend group, which helps a lot,” Menefee said. “We’ve been able to live well together because we have that mutual understanding.” Menefee and Vander Mey both grew up without any siblings, which is why the women said that living with another person — aside from their parents — has taught them to be more selfaware. Vander Mey said living with someone else helped push her out of her comfort zone. “It wasn’t hard for me to learn how to live with other people, but it was difficult getting used to [living with someone else],” Vander Mey said. Menefee said she learned she never wants to live alone after returning home during the COVID-19 campus shutdown. Living with friends, however, has not proven to be a positive experience for everyone, including senior Ooreoluwa Okediji.
