FREE 20,000 AUDITED CIRCULATION
GAY SENIORS
#535 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
E7
CHANGES AT THE IOC8 E
WHISPERS OF LIFE E 11
More at
dailyxtra.com
facebook.com/dailyxtra
@dailyxtra
Owen Ellis with his gay bestie, Parker McMullin.
Fag Stags Straight men and their gay best friends E12
GENERAL DENTISTRY
dr. langston
raymond Recognize the people that make Vancouver excellent.
Offering cosmetic restorative dentistry. Botox & Invisalign Braces in a comfortable environment
Serving the Community since 2000
dr. anna
preis
Suite 512-1033 Davie Street on-site parking available
604.687.1008
Featuring six award categories for youth and children, adults and organizations. AWARD CATEGORIES
FIN W I N T E R
AL
ACCESSIBLE CITY
WE
BUSINESS INNOVATION
EK
CIVIC VOLUNTEER DIVERSITY AND INCLUSION
C L E A R A N C E
9 4 83
WINTER CLEARANCE
9 4 83
S J J
on a wide selection of traditional and contemporary area rugs.
S J J
on a wide selection of traditional and contemporary area rugs.
)EWX -RHME 'EVTIXW D I S T I N C T I V E D E S I G N S S I N C E 19 4 8
2 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
GREENEST CITY LEADERSHIP HEALTHY CITY FOR ALL Awards will be presented at a ceremony in June 2014. Submit a nomination by 5 pm on Friday, April 4, 2014 at vancouver.ca/awards-of-excellence For more information vancouver.ca/awards-of-excellence facebook.com/CityofVancouver twitter.com/CityofVancouver Phone 3-1-1 TTY 7-1-1 Nominations are welcome for children and youth 18 years old or younger.
1606 West Second Avenue at Fir Armoury District, Vancouver Mon-Sat 10-6 Sun 12-5 604 736 5681 eastindiacarpets.com
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
Roundup
XTRA VANCOUVER’S GAY& LESBIAN NEWS
#535 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014
Published by Pink Triangle Press PUBLISHER & EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
Brandon Matheson EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR Robin Perelle STAFF REPORTER Natasha Barsotti COPY EDITOR Lesley Fraser EVENT LISTINGS oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com CONTRIBUTE OR INQUIRE about Xtra’s editorial
content: editor.vancouver@dailyxtra.com EDITORIAL CONTRIBUTORS TO THIS ISSUE
Leah Bromley, Tom Coleman, Matthew DiMera, Tyler Dorchester, Jeremy Hainsworth, Shimon Karmel, Shauna Lewis, Ash McGregor, Raziel Reid, Pega Ren, Mark Robins, Rob Trinh ART & PRODUCTION CREATIVE DIRECTOR Lucinda Wallace GRAPHIC DESIGNERS Darryl Mabey, Bryce Stuart, Landon Whittaker ADVERTISING ADVERTISING & SALES DIRECTOR Ken Hickling NATIONAL SALES MANAGER Jeffrey Hoffman SALES ADMINISTRATION MANAGER Lexi Chuba DISPLAY ADVERTISING Corey Giles, Teila Smart ONLINE ACCOUNT MANAGER Jessie Bennett ADVERTISING COORDINATOR Gary Major DISPLAY ADVERTISING Call 604-684-9696 or email advertising.vancouver@dailyxtra.com.
FILM
CLASSIFIEDS Call 604-684-9696
Hope, survival & suicide Vancouver film wins best short on festival circuit E 11 Editorial Daring to dream a little bigger By Robin Perelle E4 Feedback E4 Xcetera E5
Upfront Space for gay seniors? Dignity House wants to add seniors’ housing to new community centre E7
on dailyxtra.com E Man allegedly attacks
gay MLA’s West End office E Ugandan president signs anti-gay law E Federal government seeks public input on sex laws E Nearly a quarter of BC high school girls identify as not-straight MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
or email classifieds.vancouver@dailyxtra.com. The publication of an ad in Xtra does not mean that Xtra endorses the advertiser. Storefront features are paid advertising content. SPONSORSHIP AND BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT Erica Bestwick, erica.bestwick@dailyxtra.com
Printed and published in Canada. ©2014 Pink Triangle Press. Xtra is published every two weeks by Pink Triangle Press. ISSN 1198-0613
A gay teenager meets a stranger on a park bench in Whispers of Life TURBID LAKE PICTURES
Sochi mission a success, Stevenson says E8 St Paul’s Hospital still in limbo E8 Ask the Expert From long-distance to local By Dr Pega Ren E9
Out in the City Cover Story Man enough to be a sister The intimate yet platonic bond between gay men and their fag stags E12
Address: 501–1033 Davie St, Vancouver, BC, V6E 1M7 Office hours: Mon–Fri, 9am–5pm Phone: 604-684-9696 Fax: 604-684-9697 Website: dailyxtra.com Email: info.vancouver@dailyxtra.com SUBSCRIPTIONS $55 for one year (26 issues); $65 (US) in the US; $100 (US) overseas. subscriptions@dailyxtra.com, 800-268-XTRA
PINK TRIANGLE PRESS Founded 1971 DIRECTORS Jim Bartley, Gerald Hannon, Glenn Kauth, Didier Pomerleau, Ken Popert, Gillian Rodgerson HONORARY DIRECTOR Colin Brownlee PRESIDENT & EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR Ken Popert CEO, DIGITAL MEDIA David Walberg CHIEF OPERATING OFFICER Andrew Chang
vancouver.ca
Volunteers Needed: Vancouver Heritage Foundation Board Take on a leadership role in conserving Vancouver’s heritage buildings by volunteering for the Vancouver Heritage Foundation Board. The City is looking for volunteers from the general public to serve on the Board of Directors who will help guide heritage conservation in the city. The eight positions available will serve from April 2014 to April 2016.
Storefront Freshly baked Classic and original treats from some of Vancouver’s favourite and up-and-coming bakeries E15
Learn more about the role of Heritage Foundation Board volunteers and eligibility requirements and apply for a position online at: vancouver.ca/volunteer
Blitz & Shitz The Vatican approves By Raziel Reid E16
All appointments will be made by City Council. You must use the online form to apply. The application deadline is Thursday, March 20, 2014 at 5 pm.
What’s On E18 Real Estate E19 Xtra Living E20
FOR INFORMATION ON CIVIC AGENCIES AND APPLICATIONS: civicagenciesinfo@vancouver.ca or phone 3-1-1 (Ask to be connected with the City Clerk’s Department)
COVER PHOTO BY SHIMON KARMEL
XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 3
The outcome that we seek is this — gay and lesbian people daring together to set love free. Xtra is published by Pink Triangle Press, at 2 Carlton St, Ste 1600, Toronto, M5B 1J3.
Celebrate the life of your loved one lost… and leave the details to us.
Robin Perelle is the managing editor of Xtra Vancouver.
#534 FEB 13–26, 2014
To use PrEP or not? Here’s my analogy: a car may have seat belts and airbags [“Can This Pill Prevent HIV?” Xtra #534, Feb 13]. The combination of the two provides enhanced protection should an incident occur. If condoms are employed to reduce hep C and PrEP to prevent HIV, it will improve the quality of life and reduce healthcare costs in the long run. CAELAN (DAILYXTRA.COM)
I’ll stick with condoms. For me, the expense of this drug alone makes it a non-starter: it costs a tremendous amount of money that eventually everybody will pay for, either in the form of more expensive insurance or further burdening of our healthcare system. A close runner-up is the drug’s toxicity and the risk of liver and kidney damage. (Does anybody know what this drug will do to you after 20 years of use?) Plus, you still need to wear condoms for other STIs (notably hep C, which is killing more Americans per year than HIV) and to make up for the fact that you cannot miss a dose to retain your immunity. I don’t think the false sense of security and the risks of fucking up your body for sex that still requires a condom is worth it. DAN FALKENHAM (DAILYXTRA.COM)
As someone who works in the HIV community-based arena, I have been increasingly concerned about our trepidation — no, paranoia — about expecting poz people to take respon-
@dailyxtra
several multi-purpose rooms of varying size that can host meetings, yoga classes and maybe a small performance? Are we just planning a larger version of Qmunity, with a couple of add-ons spread more comfortably over two floors? Or can we envision new ways and spaces in which to gather, including somewhat more ambitious if multipurpose takes on the performance and social spaces so many people have named as key to a community centre they’d like to visit? Qmunity has been entrusted with anchoring this effort, and I understand why: no other local organization has both the administrative history and stability, and a broad enough mandate, to run it. But to succeed, Qmunity will need to not just consult, but collaborate with other groups. Imagine a bustling space with multiple groups serving the community, sharing ideas and possibly volunteers; socializing in the café downstairs; browsing the library-archives; meeting for shared-interest groups of all kinds; then staying for a play in the open, spacious atrium that doubles as a gallery, yoga space, basketball court and something I haven’t even thought of. Maybe we can do all that in 10,000 square feet. Or maybe we need to help Qmunity broaden its vision, give them the means and the reason to do so, then trust them to lead in collaboration.
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
facebook.com/dailyxtra
The last thing I want to do is start a power struggle that inadvertently leaves $7 million in city funding untouched on the table. Better to give each other the benefit of the doubt and work together toward creating a new community centre, I wrote in December. I stand by that, but doubts are best dealt with in the open and, despite Qmunity’s new tone of openness and approachability, I have some concerns that I just can’t shake. There’s no doubt the information session hosted by Qmunity on Feb 6 marked a turning point for an organization that has previously communicated poorly with the wider community it purports to serve. Remember the time its board unilaterally decided to leave the gay village? Admittedly, the organization was stretched taut on a shoestring budget, paying too much rent for a dilapidated space to serve as many vulnerable community members as possible. But it was practically packing its bags in the middle of the night and was none too pleased with getting caught. But moments shift and leaders change, and Qmunity’s new board and executive director seem committed to sharing information and inviting
people to participate in the process of planning a new centre. My concern is that the vision they’re asking people to help shape is already too limited. Granted, their shoestring budget hasn’t grown, despite the $7 million. As executive director Dara Parker rightfully points out, creating a space we can’t afford to operate is unsustainable. We have to be realistic, she says, and I agree. In the decades of on-andoff discussion about creating a community centre, Qmunity has never found much public interest in funding a capital campaign. Unless that changes, our means are limited. But unless our vision is expansive and inspiring, why would a broad cross-section of our community want to participate in, let alone help fund, the creation of a new gathering space that offers them little reason to visit? Which brings us back to the question of 10,000 square feet. Qmunity says that’s all we can realistically afford to build and operate. I’ve been trying to envision 10,000 square feet; it’s just a little more than double Qmunity’s current space. Parker says Qmunity is planning an extensive community consultation on how to divvy up the space, and I believe her. But how big is 10,000 square feet, really? Space for Qmunity’s offices, its library, associated clinic and
FREE 20,000 AUDITED CIRCULATION
dailyxtra.com
EDITORIAL ROBIN PERELLE
FEEDBACK
More at
Comment Daring to dream a little bigger
email comment@dailyxtra.com comment dailyxtra.com & facebook.com/dailyxtra tweet @dailyxtra
CAN THIS PILL PREVENT
HIV?
The promise and uncertainty of pre-exposure prophylaxis E10
sibility for condom use or any other modality that reduces their risk of infecting others. Yes, being HIV-positive carries sometimes overwhelmingly painful realities, but HIV-positive people do have an increased responsibility to help in public health issues related to their status. There, I said it. We don’t need to further stigmatize poz people. But, we need to stop actively negating any sense of reasonable responsibility the poz person has in helping to reduce further infections. We all need to take responsibility for our health, but those who have transmittable diseases (of any type) bear an additional burden. That basic reality seems to have been aggressively buried by my colleagues and members of the poz community due to an outdated sense of HIV exceptionalism. SEEINGITDIFFERENTLY (DAILYXTRA.COM)
I’m HIV-negative, and I certainly want to stay that way. A combo of condoms and the medication in question seems ideal to this bottoming old queen. I’m no deep thinker, but I really can’t see a downside to a more widespread use of this drug. 1DIZZY1 (DAILYXTRA.COM)
Funeral Pre-Planning Cruises on False Creek Register online or call us for your FREE cruise Visit our website to start planning your funeral wishes now www.mbfunerals.com/vancouver
PRE-PLAN
my funeral wishes
NOW
3398 Dunbar Street (at West 18th) 778.330.7799 dunbar@mbfunerals.com 4 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
XCETERA
NO FLIP JUST SAY NO
TOP or BOTTOM ? Mr. Mattress mattresses are VERSATILE!! Padded on both sides.
EST.
1964
This means you can FLIP your mattress. Two sides, twice the life.
Sensible Prices s Friendly Service s Zero Pressure
1315 Venables St mrmattress.ca | 604.255.2113
A+ Rating Since 1975
www.westend-dentist.ca TEXAS SMACKDOWN
You kill people while driving drunk? That guy’s welcome . . . Players accused of rape and pay the woman to go away? You lie to police trying to cover up a murder? We’re comfortable with that. You love another man? Well, now you’ve gone too far. — Dallas sportscaster Dale Hansen responds to NFL officials who said football is a “man’s-man game” after University of Missouri star player Michael Sam, an NFL prospect, came out.
STRAIGHT TALK PROPAGANDA POLKA
CAN YOU SAY Gay, okay; dead, DOUBLE STANDARDS? not so much For at least one rival politician and journalist in Belgium, the sight of Elio Di Rupo, the country’s gay prime minister, having a quick shirt change on a hot day is “outrageous” and “the epitome of indecency.” Guess they managed to miss the umpteen times Russian President Vladimir Putin dropped shirt to go fishing, horseback riding or wrestling with assorted wildlife.
The UK’s Guardian newspaper recently stated that actor Sir Patrick Stewart is gay, a huge relief to the Star Trek and X-Men star, who quipped that it was a welcome change from waking up to internet news that he had died. Stewart also hyped his cred with the straight crowd: “@guardian I have, like, five or even SEVEN hetero friends and we totally drink beer and eat lots of chicken wings!”
Dr. Dean Wershler
General Dentistry
New patients welcome. Saturday and evening appointments available.
#THENEWSEGREGATION
T/
Equal-opportunity pizza With the Arizona legislature’s passing of a bill that would allow businesses to refuse service to gay people on religious grounds, Rocco’s Little Chicago Pizzeria in Tucson has decided to serve lawmakers a slice of their own state-sanctioned discrimination should they cross the eatery’s threshold. As Xtra goes to press, there’s no word on whether Governor Jan Brewer will sign the measure. MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
Russia: Video shows Pussy Riot members under attack dailyxtra.com XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 5
6 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
Upfront
This is a huge organization, and it’s a massive change in a short period of time. Tim Stevenson E8
Space for gay seniors? Dignity House wants to add seniors’ housing to new community centre GAY SPACE MATTHEW DIMERA
The team behind Vancouver’s latest proposal to create gay seniors’ housing is hoping to merge its project with Qmunity’s proposed city-funded community centre. While affordable housing is a hot topic for most communities in Metro Vancouver, studies suggest that gay seniors often face increased risks of health and financial insecurity, as well as isolation. Little data has been collected on gay seniors in Canada, but statistics from the American Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders (SAGE) paint a disturbing picture of the many challenges gay seniors face. SAGE research indicates that seniors who fear mistreatment from healthcare providers will often delay seeking help until their health reaches a crisis point. Surveys of gay seniors in long-term care facilities showed that only “22 percent felt they could be open about their sexual identities with staff, and 89 percent predicted that staff would discriminate based on their sexual orientations and/ or gender identities, and 43 percent reported instances of mistreatment.” Other SAGE studies show that many gay seniors face higher levels of financial insecurity and often cannot afford to stay in their chosen communities. Gay seniors are less likely to have children to look after them, are less likely to have someone to call in an emergency, and face high risk of social isolation. Alan Herbert, a former Vancouver city councillor and longtime gay activist who created a gay senior men’s discussion group called Gay and Gray last fall, says that for those in the community who grew up before 1980 the memories of open prejudice and bullying against gay people still have a strong effect. “They don’t know whether it will be safe or not, and the tendency for many will be to go back into the closet,” he says MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
of seniors who end up in assisted living. Herbert says the need for affordable housing is magnified by the reality that the uncertain future at the height of the AIDS crisis didn’t encourage many gay men to buy property or invest for their retirement. “A lot of the guys who were alive at the height of the epidemic were either sick themselves, during the years where they would have had their highest earning potential, or their friends were dying,” he explains. The Dignity House project aims to alleviate some of these pressures on Vancouver’s aging gay population. Its proposal to develop affordable housing in Vancouver for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender seniors and their allies originated in August 2012 as the practicum project of local social worker Alex Sangha, who has since completed his master’s in social work. The Dignity House proposal is now run by a 17-member advisory committee and is currently conducting a feasibility study. Sangha, still the project coordinator, thinks a partnership could benefit both his group and Qmunity. “If we’re looking for land and Qmunity is looking for land, then we could share a site and we could build affordable housing adjacent to the community building,” he says. Instead of competing for land, why not work together collaboratively to build something for the community, Sangha suggests. Dara Parker, Qmunity’s executive director, is cautiously optimistic about partnering with Dignity House. “I love the idea,” she says, noting that Qmunity has been advocating for queer seniors’ housing for a long time. Adding a housing component would be beyond the scope of the currently envisioned 10,000-square-foot community centre, she says, but “if we’re going into a new multi-purpose development, I think
In principle, we absolutely support and are actively advocating for LGBTQ seniorsspecific housing. We know that’s the number-one ask from older adults in the community. —QMUNITY ED DARA PARKER
Alan Herbert, who runs a weekly discussion group for gay seniors, thinks combining the proposed community centre with gay seniors’ housing would benefit both groups as they seek funding from government and the public. ASH MCGREGOR
that would be a great place to co-locate [Qmunity and seniors’ housing].” “In principle, we absolutely support and are actively advocating for LGBTQ seniors-specific housing,” she continues. “We know that’s the number-one ask from older adults in the community, and it is an important piece of the housing continuum locally.” Parker says her role might be to encourage the idea and to look for partners who could make it a reality. Herbert acknowledges that considerable time and effort would be needed but thinks that combining the community centre with gay seniors’ housing would help both groups as they seek out funding from government and the public. Dignity House is not the first local attempt to create housing for gay seniors in Vancouver. RainbowVision Vancouver proposed a joint venture between a local home-healthcare service provider and a US-based property developer in 2008, but so far nothing has materialized. An affordable-housing project for gay seniors opened recently in downtown Philadelphia. Los Angeles and Minneapolis are also home to existing projects, while more proposals continue to sprout up around the US. XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 7
OLYMPICS
Sochi mission a success, Stevenson says
making the law work for all of us Family law, wills & estates, human rights, immigration, & civil litigation 100% success rate for same sex spousal sponsorships since 1992 1033 Davie St. 604-251-4356 EMI#EDUEDUDÀQGOD\ FRP
The International Olympic Committee (IOC) is poised to review its charter and implement significant changes to protect gay athletes, according to Vancouver Councillor Tim Stevenson. “The president [of the IOC] decided that the IOC needed to go in a new direction,” says Stevenson, who is gay. Leveraging Vancouver and Whistler’s position as a past Olympic host, and representing Vancouver as deputy mayor, Stevenson travelled to Sochi Jan 28 to lobby the IOC to explicitly protect gay athletes and make the inclusion of Pride Houses mandatory in host-city bids. Stevenson says top-ranking IOC officials told him that a “comprehensive review” is now underway and is expected to be complete by December 2014. “This is a huge organization, and it’s a massive change in a short period of time,” he says.
In an email to Xtra dated Feb 14, IOC communications director Mark Adams confirms that “the IOC is currently going through a fundamental process under its new president looking at all aspects of the Games. “We have asked all stakeholders and the general public to contribute and every subject is open for debate,” he says. “Should there be a majority in favour of such a change [adding sexual orientation to the charter] it would be possible.” However, Adams reiterates that the IOC believes its charter already prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation. “We have always made it very clear that we consider that the current wording forbids any discrimination. And we have stated many times that this absolutely includes on grounds of sexual orientation,” he says. — Shauna Lewis
Councillor Tim Stevenson (right) says he met for an hour and a half Feb 3 with IOC chief of staff Jochen Farber (left) and communications director Mark Adams. COURTESY OF MAUREEN DOUGLAS (IAN JONES/IOC PHOTO)
HEALTH
St Paul’s Hospital still in limbo After more than a decade of delays and promised concept plans and business cases to keep St Paul’s Hospital in the West End, its redevelopment is once again absent from the new BC budget, released Feb 18. According to the Ministry of Health’s last service plan, released in February 2013, a final concept plan and then a detailed business plan for redevelopment were expected to be completed sometime this year. This year’s service plan, which takes the ministry to 2017, says the ministry is still working with Providence Health Care to finalize the concept plan. Spokespeople for the hospital and the ministry concur. “The redevelopment timeframe will be determined through the busi8 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
ness plan process,” the ministry’s new service plan says. “It is anticipated the redevelopment will include construction of a new outpatient care tower on the northwest corner of the current St Paul’s Hospital site as well as essential site infrastructure upgrades and selected renovations such as seismic upgrades to existing buildings.” “Here we are in 2014, and they’re still talking about a concept plan,” says NDP MLA Spencer Chandra Herbert, who serves the West End. “I’m incredibly frustrated.” — Jeremy Hainsworth
For more on these stories, go to dailyxtra.com. VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
From long-distance to local There are many ways to build a home together ASK THE EXPERT DR PEGA REN
Dear Dr Ren, Eric and I met almost five years ago and hit it off immediately. Six months later, he moved away for a job and we continued long-distance. Now Eric has a chance to move back and wants us to move in together. Originally keen, I’m feeling increasingly apprehensive. Our lifestyles are very different. I’m the frugal artist to Eric’s grandiose businessman. I own a small but comfortable home, while he rents luxurious condos with views. I’m happiest in my kitchen; he collects frequent-flyer miles. I could go on. Even so, we have fun and love deeply. Never have I found anyone who so perfectly matches me sexually. When I consider this, all the rest seems inconsequential. We worked really well long-distance. Can an exceptional sexual and intimate bond override differences in lifestyles? Can we make cohabiting work? Are we doomed, or am I just a . . . — Nervous Groom Dear Nervous Groom, Your particular relationship history may well be the place to look for your answers. After a brief period in which you enjoyed limerence (new relationship energy), you were separated by distance and therefore obliged to de-
velop a pattern that would support a great deal of independence. It sounds like you thrived individually and as a couple as you grew your love. Now, five years later, fully committed and comfortable with your pattern, you are faced with a massive shift. You would need to be brain-dead not to have some concerns about how this will change your interactions! Perhaps expanding your options would relieve some of the pressure. Why not live in the same city but not the same home? Do you worry that Eric will interpret this suggestion as rejection? Believe me, you two will need to practise having many courageous conversations. You will now need to discuss how you get comfortable with togetherness, just as you previously learned to navigate distance. Don’t be rattled. You already know your differences and similarities; they needn’t be weaknesses and strengths. Understanding that you thrive with independence can help you devise a plan that supports that knowledge. That individuality will also foster the retention of the great sex life you mention. Too much togetherness dulls desire. Rather than finding domestic bliss, you may begin squabbling about money or housekeeping issues, and you’ll be less likely to summon your customary erotic heat. Less independent unions often become erotically challenged. Our sexual souls seem instead to crave passionate difference.
A bit more about that sexual connection: we are all unique, self-indulgent and stalwart about what we like in bed. If our sexual personalities are akin to our lover’s, we can each make little accommodations to build a solid and fulfilling sexual pattern. We learn how to honour our lover’s arousal pattern while teaching them what we need to feel desire and satisfaction. The process can be romantic and fun. But, when the fit is there from the start, we can skip that accommodation step altogether because sex launches as already expansive, adventurous and exhilarating. Each partner, accepted and encouraged, grows and transforms. Barriers to intimacy fall. Confidence and vulnerability thrive. This is the stuff of fairy tales, the swooning, swept-away delight of being truly known and challenged to be ever more ourselves. It is rare and precious. You would do well to value it as it deserves. So risk those tough discussions. Consider your many options. Together, creatively design a relationship that allows you to preserve the emotional and possibly the residential distance that sustains your individuality and your heat, while allowing you the luxury of building a home together, regardless of how that real estate may look. Have a question for Dr Ren? Send an email to asktheexpert@dailyxtra.com.
523 Parliament St. Tel 647.988.489 Visit www.ftjco.com/custom
Bowling at Revs Burnaby March 22 & 23, 2014 details at vebc.ca
Get FRESH at Nesters Right in the Heart of Your Community Great Selection U Great Prices U Quality Products Convenient Locations UÊFriendly Staff
Yaletown 990 Seymour St. Vancouver Monday - Friday 7am - 10pm, Weekends 8am - 10pm MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
Sponsored by Storm
Media Sponsor dailyxtra.com
The bowler’s company
XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 9
10 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
Out in the City
I feel like many straight men are envious of gay sexuality. Trevor Risk E12
Hope, survival & suicide Vancouver film wins best short on festival circuit
Whispers of Life, by filmmakers Florian Halbedl (left) and Joshua Ferguson, blurs reality to show a gay teen beautiful hope in despair. TURBID LAKE PICTURES
FILM MARK ROBINS
Not all stories of suicide need to be scary and dark, say filmmakers Florian Halbedl and Joshua Ferguson, who prefer to focus on hope and survival in their award-winning film Whispers of Life. The 10-minute short tells the story of Tom, a gay teen who encounters a stranger on a park bench following an interaction with a homophobic bully. Encouraging the young man to use his imagination, the stranger helps Tom enter a beautiful and surreal world where he comes to realize the impact his suicide would have on those around him. “We wanted parts of the film to reflect the power of imagination in relation to survival,” explains Ferguson, who identifies as transgender and prefers the pronoun “they.” Though Ferguson says Whispers of Life is not autobiographical, it was inspired by their own experiences of being bullied in high school. “I try not to let my own story detract from the experience of others watching the movie, though,” they say. “We’re all survivors of suicide in some way.” “Joshua has gone through hell with bullying, and while some of the film came out of Joshua’s experiences, it also came from what was happening in the news with the suicides of queer youth,” says Halbedl, Ferguson’s husband, during a break from the set of a feature film being shot in Vancouver. In shifting between the real world and the young man’s imagination, the filmmakers say they’re trying to reinforce the idea that one doesn’t always have to look externally for answers. “It’s important sometimes to find the magic within yourself, to use your imagination to find your place in the world,” Halbedl says. The stranger and his willingness to intervene underline the importance of paying attention to the people around us, rather than simply walking by. “We wanted to bring in someone who is willing to play an active role in helping. A lot of times with queer youth, thoughts of suicide or even the act could be prevented if they had the right support system,” Halbedl says. Five years in the making, the Vancouver-shot MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
We wanted parts of the film to reflect the power of imagination in relation to survival. FILMMAKER JOSHUA FERGUSON
film was completed last April with help from industry heavyweights such as Kevin Struckman and Mark Meloche, who created the film’s stunning visual effects and whose resumés include the locally shot Once Upon a Time and Supernatural television series. Whispers of Life is now touring the international film-festival circuit and most recently won the Audience Award for Best Short at the 2014 Reelout Queer Film + Video Festival in Kingston, Ontario.
In handing the award to Halbedl and Ferguson, the festival’s executive director, Matt Salton, called the film “a must-see for queer youth and those who work with LGBTQ youth, as it is an empowering testament to the value of young lives in turmoil.” Whispers of Life will screen at the Reel 2 Real International Film Festival for Youth in Vancouver this April. Visit r2rfestival.org for information. Halbedl and Ferguson will both be in attendance. XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 11
COVER STORY
Maenno o t ugh be a
sister The intimate yet platonic bond between gay men and their fag stags
T
BY RAZIEL REID | PHOTOS BY SHIMON KARMEL
revor Risk moved to Vancouver 13 years ago and was promptly adopted by the gay village. “Everyone west of Thunder Bay who ran away from home because of their sexuality lived on Davie Street at the time,” he recalls. “No one really had family; everyone was out for themselves and everyone looked after each other because of it.” Risk grew up in a town of 6,000 people where his best, and for a long time only, friend was the town’s only openly gay guy. When he moved here and discovered the Davie Village, he also discovered a sense of unity in a community that was willing to welcome him even though he isn’t gay himself. “Everyone was just keen on being complimentary and encouraging and doing whatever the hell you wanted,” he says. “You’d go out and no two people would be dressed the same, and that was really comforting for me, trying to express myself at a young age. More than anything I felt that I could leave the house, listen to what I want, be who I wanted to, and on top of that not have the distractions of romance.” “There’s this intense pressure in being straight to couple off all the time, that you’re not going to be fulfilled unless you find the one,” he says. “I just don’t believe that anymore. In the gay community, that pressure just isn’t there. People couple off, obviously, but they don’t feel the same pressure to find someone forever. “I feel like many straight men are envious of gay sexuality. It just seems like it might be simpler in many ways,” he says. Risk is one of what seems to be a growing number of fag stags in Vancouver: men who identify as straight but are practically honorary members of the gay community through their intimate yet 12 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
non-sexual friendships with gay guys. Owen Ellis shares Risk’s affinity for the gay community. Ellis, who also identifies as straight, says he “wishes he was gay, without the butt-sex.” At his West Vancouver high school, Ellis befriended a closeted Iranian classmate from a “super-conservative family.” “He was flaming, and I kind of knew it, but I didn’t think so much of it,” he says. “He was picked on quite a bit, and I ended up being the only one who came to his birthday party. “He was seen as outsider,” he says of what drew them together. “He was made fun of, and I was weird myself. He was just funny. Neither of us really had many friends.” Now a filmmaker, Ellis draws inspiration
I’ve had women in the past leave me because they think I’m gay. TREVOR RISK
from gay culture and seeks to capture it onscreen himself. He directed indie band Sunshine’s music video “Showering with Wine,” about the drunken adventure of a gay Superman and Batman, complete with a make-out session on Granville Street. It was Ellis who convinced one of the stars of the music video, Parker McMullin, to dress in drag for another project he was shooting. Soon after, McMullin debuted Jane Smoker. “Gay people are more unique than anyone I’ve ever met,” Ellis says. “I don’t feel like [many straight people have] ever had to look inside of themselves. They just see that they’re like everyone else; that’s it — my life’s lined up for me. [Gay people] are different their whole lives, and in that way I kind of feel like I can be more of myself when I’m around them.” Alex Alvarez also feels freer in the gay community. “There’s more of us?” he says, asked if he’s a fag stag. “It’s not just me? I thought I was just a weirdo!” Alvarez grew up in Maple Ridge, somewhat sheltered from big-city life. He was only too happy to discover Vancouver’s gay scene when a new friend from summer camp introduced him to the lesbian bar Lick in 2007. “It was a really good time,” he says. “I was like, this happens? I guess that was my foot in the door.” He’s kept his foot in the door ever since, even when it has sometimes led to conflict. “I often get confused for being queer,” he says. “I’ve been to enough straight parties where people start things with me. I’ve had a lot of confrontations where it’s like, I’m judging you and I’m going to start shit with you.” One night, while dancing at The Met, Alvarez was harassed by a straight guy who assumed he was gay and tried to pick up the girl he was with.
Parker McMullin’s fag stag, Owen Ellis, (bottom) feels connected to gay culture and his close friends but says he’s not just biding his time waiting to come out. “I’m 25,” he says. “My life is not like that movie In & Out, with Kevin Kline figuring out he’s gay at 40.”
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
“It got really awkward,” he says. “He was asking me what kind of genitals I prefer.” Alvarez was not deterred. He prefers the company of gay men and has the self-confidence to withstand the assumptions and even the occasionally belligerent posturing of straight men. “A typical hangout if you see your straight friends is you drink a lot of beer, and it’s like, Oh, let’s go out and get some pussy,” he says. “With gay friends, it’s different. You talk about art, politics, what’s happening in the city. More cultured things . . . [They’ve] changed my views on gender identity, sexual identity, beauty — pretty much everything. If I didn’t have gay friends, I would be more ignorant. Quality of life would be lower.” Risk also describes a different quality of friendship, discussion and support from his gay friends, especially when it comes to breakups. “My straight friends offer me insight at the most, but usually distraction,” he says. “Whereas some of my gay friends might talk to me about how to negotiate my feelings and how to get through it.”
“People in relationships always think about other people outside their relationships, what sex or love would be like with another person,” he admits, openly sharing that his curiosity has extended to what it would be like to be with another man. “I can’t really think of a recent time,” he says, “but I’m sure I have. When I’m in a relationship with a woman, I often think out loud, ‘Wow, that girl over there is awfully pretty,’ but I also say the equivalent thing about men when I meet them. I appreciate men’s and women’s looks in the same way I like a sports car or a work of art, but I’m usually in a monogamous relationship, so I don’t think of either sexually.” “What can gay men teach straight men about sexuality?” he muses. “I suppose they can teach them to understand that it’s not about possession. We use terms in the straight world that are semantically unfortunate. We say that women ‘gave it up’ or ‘put out’ and that men ‘get laid’
D
espite their bond with gay men, and contrary to what some may suspect, there’s nothing down-low about fag stags. They are not extreme closet cases who have yet to accept their true sexuality. In fact, they seem more at ease with themselves than anyone I’ve ever met, gay or straight. “I’m 25,” Ellis says. “My life is not like that movie In & Out, with Kevin Kline figuring out he’s gay at 40. “Every straight person goes through that thing, like, am I or not?” he admits, but he says he’s simply not attracted to men. “I can see my friends as attractive, but I’ve never wanted to pursue them,” he says, a finding reinforced by the one time he ever experimented with a man. “I was really wasted and I hated it. I could feel his beard and shit. I didn’t like it all.” Ellis remembers the time he took in a gay friend who was “depressed about something one night; he didn’t have a place to stay. So I was like, ‘Just come crash in my bed.’” The next day, his other friends were “kind of weirded out when they saw a gay guy sleeping in my bed. They just assumed [it was sexual],” he says. “There’s that funny mentality a lot of straight guys seem to have, which is that every gay man will be attracted to them,” Alvarez says. “Dear straight dudes, not everyone wants to have sex with you. I think once people have accepted the fact that queer sexuality is not an assault on straight sexuality, then we’ll really see some progress.” Risk can appreciate another man’s beauty without feeling threatened or defensive. “I had a waiter last night at a restaurant, and I said to the woman I was on a date with, ‘That man is so handsome; he’s so great looking,’” he says. “I’ve had women in the past leave me because they think I’m gay,” he confides. “I’ve had women be jealous of gay men. I’ve had it come to a real head many times before, and I just find that’s ignorant on their part; that’s their issue to deal with. They have to wake up and be them every morning.”
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
A typical hangout if you see your straight friends is you drink a lot of beer, and it’s like, Oh, let’s go out and get some pussy. With gay friends, it’s different. ALEX ALVAREZ or ‘got some,’ and although the gay community does often use that same slang, it doesn’t carry the same connotation, historical or otherwise. I feel like the gay community’s sexuality is about sharing and meeting and not giving something up or taking sex from someone.” “I think gay men are much more comfortable really expressing themselves, where I see a lot of straight men trying to fit these tired old moulds of masculinity,” Alvarez says. “The way I see it, sexuality isn’t a matter of putting on a facade to attract potential partners, but it’s really more a matter of being open and vulnerable — showing people who you are. I think that’s what us straights can really learn, is to be comfortable with who we are and stop putting on a front.”
T
he fag stag/gay relationship isn’t just about gay men teaching straight guys a thing or two; it goes both ways. For
Conor Topley, the straight men in his life have taught him how to be more confident in his own sexuality. He and his fag-stag roommate, whom he met at university, can talk about anything: “dating life, politics, career ambitions, sex, the ongoing existential crisis of our generation,” he says. “In a world that does a poor job of making it acceptable for men, especially straight men, to be vulnerable, my roommate’s ability to be forthcoming with his emotions has not only been refreshing, but is also a great reminder to bring my guard down and share more openly. “Good chat is one thing, but his actions speak more than words,” he says. “If I have a gaggle of gays over, [he] joins in on the banter. Although meek at times, he comfortably navigates conversations, which range in topics from Grindr etiquette to Beyoncé’s Rise to Supreme.” Just as fag stags maintain there are no sexual feelings beneath the surface of their friendships with gay men, gay guys profess to be equally disinterested. “All my relationships with straight men are riddled with sexual tension and a longing for something that will never come to pass,” Topley jokes sarcastically. He admits to having had feelings for some straight male friends in the past but doesn’t see “anything wrong with crushing on someone,” although “acting on that crush when there hasn’t been clear permission to proceed seems like an obvious no-no” and isn’t worth sacrificing his meaningful friendships. For Ellis’s drag debutante McMullin, having straight male friends started when he was in the closet. “I always had straight friends growing up because I grew up pretending to be straight,” he says. “I was around them all the time. Most of my friends were girls, but I’d be around their boyfriends, or my brother’s friends would be over, and he’s straight. That’s when I became comfortable around them.” Today, McMullin believes the key to a successful friendship with a straight guy is a good sense of humour, an open mind and playfulness. “As long as they’re not threatened,” he says. “I have some straight friends, and you can kind of tell that they get a little weird sometimes. Something will click in them and you’ll even see it in their face — if they think you’re hitting on them or getting a little too ‘gay.’ But Owen, and a lot of people I know who are really comfortable with their sexuality, can laugh it off and play along with it.” That comfort level is essential, he says, because “no one should feel they have to be anyone else. I’m not going to stop talking about celebrities and the clothes I bought! I am who am I, especially when we’re drinking and getting crazy. I’m not going to change.” A true fag stag wouldn’t want it any other way. “Getting crazy” with their gay friends is a part of the appeal. “Man, some of the things that have happened in the green room at The Cobalt on Saturday nights,” Risk says. “I’ve had my pants pulled down and held down by like four [gay guys]. I have a good sense of humour about myself. If it’s from people I know, I just eat up. It’s fine. It’s flattering, but also it’s just fun. To me that’s what going out is about: you’re going on weird little adventures and saying yes instead of no.” XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 13
TO RUSSIA WITH LOVE
Xtra and Zee Zee Theatre bring you a chance to win a pair of tickets to
Lowest Common Denominator at PAL Theatre, 581 Cardero St, for any show between March 14 and 20
has been a HUGE success... THANKS to you!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
To enter, send your name and phone number to contest@dailyxtra.com before Monday, March 10. Some restrictions apply. Only winners will be contacted.
1025 DAVIE ST. • (604) 687-2222
er, send your name and phone number
Vera's Top Ten Slogan List - The Countdown Cher did it... so can you! What if you could add 10 to 20 healthy years to your life? What if you could turn back time and feel younger? The Integrative Healthy Aging program is not only for aging patients. Science is proving that physical and mental deterioration is NOT a requirement of ageing. s )NCREASED ENERGY VITALITY s )MPROVED SEX DRIVE PERFORMANCE s 3UPERIOR LEAN MUSCLE MASS REDUCED FAT s 3LOWED DEGENERATION ASSOCIATED WITH AGING s )MPROVED COGNITIVE FUNCTION MEMORY s %NHANCED IMMUNE FUNCTION s 1UICKENED HEALING PROCESS s )MPROVED SKIN TONE s )NCREASED CARDIOVASCULAR HEALTH s %NHANCED ATHLETIC PERFORMANCE
Visit integrative.ca for more information
#6 Our burgers are REALLY big, you can take it!
Check back each issue to find out! The grand reveal will be on April 24th!
Two great locations! 1030 Davie St. 604.893.8372 1181 Denman St. 604.681.5450 Follow us:
Locations throughout the Lower Mainland Integrative Naturopathic Medical Centre 730–1285 W Broadway 604.738.1012 14 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
verasburgershack.com
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
STOREFRONT
Classic and original treats from some of Vancouver’s favourite and up-and-coming bakeries
FRESHLY BAKED PHOTOS BY LEAH BROMLEY
If our hankering for freshly baked comfort food increases in direct correlation to the amount of rainfall, now would be the perfect time to visit Vancouver’s local purveyors of hearty, savoury or just plain weird baked goodies to celebrate the coming end of another Wet Coast winter.
East Village Bakery 2166 E Hastings St eastvillagebakery.com Gluten-free vegan baking never sounded so good: blueberry chai and sweet orange muffins, banana-date breakfast bites, lemonpistachio cookies, bite-sized coconut cakes with raspberry glaze and sugared violet garnish. “About 80 percent of our returning customers are choosing gluten-free, not because of dietary restrictions, but for the health benefits and the taste,” owner Karin Piett says. After introducing me to a hot chocolate brownie (surprise ingredient: cayenne), she can count me as a returning customer.
Lee’s Donuts Granville Island Market, 1689 Johnston St granvilleisland.com These are doughnuts with street cred: Alan and Betty Ann Lee are original Granville Island Market tenants. Almost 30 years later, they’re still offering the best honey-dip in town. Baked fresh throughout the day, the doughnuts travel fewer than 15 feet from kitchen to counter. In addition to the classics, new flavours such as red velvet, key lime and chai spice have been added to the racks. Personally, I’m yearning for the return of the limited-edition salted caramel. Pretty please?
Musette Caffè 1262 Burrard St (alley entrance) musettecaffe.com Instant exclusivity is yours to enjoy just by finding this place! Catering to the urban and urbane commuter cyclist, Musette Caffè is nestled into the alley between Burrard and Hornby streets, just north of Drake Street. In addition to their traditional Italian paninis and raw energy bars, 90 percent of their baked goods — croissants, crostata, scones and the addictive (and gluten-free) salted chocolate-chip cookies — are prepared in-house. With your robust 49th Parallel Americano in hand, be sure to peruse their finely curated collection of chic cycle-wear.
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
ManCakes 288 Robson St mancakesbakery.com The men behind the ManCakes are beer-league hockey players, rock climbers and competitive cheerleaders. If that isn’t enough to get you in the door of their automotivegarage-inspired café, the flavour combinations will: whiskey lime, bacon chili chocolate and Buffalo wing, to name a few. “We do unique really well,” co-owner Geoff Hamilton says. He also does pushups when he gets an increasingly rare moment. Go on a Wednesday afternoon — maybe you’ll get a show with your King Kong cupcake. XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 15
The Vatican approves Leather and sacrilege bless the Village BLITZ & SHITZ RAZIEL REID Jockstraps, harnesses, assless chaps and groping . . . add some Eastern European twink prostitutes and The Vatican, a leather-fetish dance party at the aptly styled Heaven’s Door, and it sounds like a night in Vatican City to me! I grew up Catholic, and the ďŹ rst man I was ever attracted to as a young blasphemer was Jesus Christ nailed to the cross. His abs were like rungs on Jacob’s ladder, each one taking me higher. The son of God is a bondage pin-up, and I will gladly get on my knees for him . . . just not to pray. As it so happened, I met Jesus at The Vatican. Some dude shoved his hand
up my crack (how’d he know that’s the lock to my heart?), and when I turned around to introduce myself — I’m oldschool like that — he told me his name by showing off a back tat that read “Jesus.� Praise the Lord! He may not have been strapped to a cross, but he said that could easily be arranged. The Vatican is the latest event to rapture to Heaven’s Door. The newly renovated venue is quickly becoming an alternative outlet on Davie, distancing itself from the more commercial parties on the strip — and the basic bitches who frequent them. You can join the clergy at Heaven’s Door with The Vatican every other month; Truckerdisco monthly; Myria Le Noir’s early-evening drag show every Saturday; Queer-Prov, with the Bobbers, on Monday nights; and,
Raziel (left) pays his own kind of tribute to The Vatican, Feb 15 at the new leather-fetish party at Heaven’s Door. ROB TRINH
rumoured to be taking off mid-March, a weekly Friday house party with DJ Rennie Foster, a straight boy determined to get the fags dancing who’s been playing Tokyo for the past decade. I have to admit I was feeling a little uneasy when I first walked through the golden gates of Heaven’s Door and was greeted by real live angels — dancing bears and leather daddies! On the surface level, a leather party can be intimidating. My biggest discomfort came from being so overdressed. What was I thinking wearing clothes?!
Thankfully, those leather boys have sweet hearts beneath their tough exteriors and one of the hosts found me a harness. It was my ďŹ rst time wearing one (I know, shocker). The outďŹ t change helped, but I’m pretty sure it was the crack-sweat elixir ung into my beer glass that really loosened me up. I was minding my own business when someone butt-swatted the guy in front of me and ass juice ew into my pint! So tasty. A few of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence were in attendance, but they weren’t wearing their habits. If ever there
were a time for them to look like virgin whores it was at The Vatican. Fortunately, Mantra made up for it by dressing as a nun in studs, serving Mother General’s ďŹ rst-time-at-a-dyke-bar realness. During her performance she was tipped like the donation basket at Sunday mass. While writing this issue’s cover story on fag stags, I talked to straight guys who are connected to the gay community partly through their presence at queer events, especially in the East Van scene. Talking to them exposed me to the beneďŹ ts of taking down The Great Wall of Glitter and bringing heteros into the queer fold, but I had to wonder: are we losing anything at all by letting them in? What The Vatican showed me is that there will always be niches of the gay community that are ours and ours alone. DJ Nick Bertossi’s straight brother and his girlfriend were at Heaven’s Door for a while and seemed to be having the time of their lives (especially when she got as shirtless as the boys), but once they had had their fun and left, only the gays remained standing — or kneeling. I went into the dark “sex roomâ€? at the back of the bar to blow a father, son and holy ghost; it reminded me of a reverseconfessional where no one was trying to be absolved because, as Jesus told me while we, uh, prayed, if it’s a sin, it’s our sin, and the good Lord is totally jerking off to it.
@6<9 )90+., 6=,9 ;96<)3,+ >(;,9: 0M `V\ ULLK H WLYZVUHS PUQ\Y` SH^`LY PU =HUJV\]LY [OL (JJPKLU[Z HUK 7LYZVUHS 0UQ\Y` 3H^ KLWHY[TLU[ VM 5VY[O :OVYL 3H^ WYV]PKLZ H M\SS YHUNL VM SLNHS HK]PJL PU HSS HYLHZ VM WLYZVUHS PUQ\Y` SP[PNH[PVU >L VMMLY H MYLL JVUZ\S[H[PVU ;OL PUQ\YLK WHY[` KVLZUÂť[ WH` HU`[OPUN \U[PS [OLPY JHZL PZ ZL[[SLK 796<+3@ :,9=05. ;/, 3,:)0(5 .(@ )0:,?<(3 (5+ ;9(5:.,5+,9,+ *644<50;0,:
[O Ă&#x2026; VVY >LZ[ ,ZWSHUHKL c 5VY[O =HUJV\]LY )* = 4 1 ;LSLWOVUL! c -H_! c ;VSS MYLL!
^^^ UVY[OZOVYLSH^ JVT
#news #arts #travel #events Everything gay, every day. 16 FEB 27â&#x20AC;&#x201C;MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
DAILY dailyxtra.com VANCOUVERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
Powerful Solutions forLife Life Coach Doug Anderson Personal & Business Coaching doug@21cd.ca | 778.877.6276 www.21stcenturydynamics.com | www.povcanada.com
L AW R E N H A R R I S C A N A D I A N V I S I O N A RY
OPENING MARCH 1st! Witness the evolution of this exceptional artist and founding member of the Group of Seven. Generously Supported by:
Stephanie A. Carlson
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
for children age 12 & under Supported by Visionary Partner:
vanartgallery.bc.ca
XTRA! FEB 27â&#x20AC;&#x201C;MARCH 12, 2014 17
WHAT'S ON FOR MORE EVENT LISTINGS, GO TO DAILYXTRA.COM
Thurs, Feb 27 Rainbow Support Group BC’s Alzheimer Society offers a support group for LGBT caregivers and those caring for LGBT people with dementia. For more information or to register, contact 604-675-5153 or kturner@alzheimerbc.org. Spoonful Send-Off Celebrate 25 years of A Loving Spoonful’s service at its old location before it moves. 5:30–8:30pm. 100-1300 Richards St. Free. alovingspoonful.org The Sundown The Cobalt hosts a laid-back clubhouse-style night for queer women and their allies every Thursday. 9pm. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. $3–6. thecobalt.ca Clue: The Musical Ghost Light Projects presents its own take on the popular board game. Runs Tues–Sat until Sat, March 8. 8pm. The Havana Theatre, 1212 Commercial Dr. $35 and under at brownpapertickets.com.
Fri, Feb 28 Showtunes Night Sing along to your favourite musicals at 1181.
boxers or briefs, 8x6 invites you to show off your underwear on Friday nights. 8pm until late. Club 8x6, 1775 Haro St. $10 members, $15 guests; includes locker. 8x6.ca Queer Women on the Drive Join this monthly women’s get-together the last Friday of every month. 7pm. Britannia Community Centre, Seniors’ Lounge, 1661 Napier St at Commercial Dr. generations@ qmunity.ca
6–9pm. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. 1181.ca Vancouver Gaymers Anniversary Vancouver’s social club for queer gamers and their allies celebrates five years with a buffet dinner and a wide selection of board games, Wii gaming on the big screen and even some karaoke. 5–9pm. La Fontana Caffé, 3701 Hastings St. $10. vancouvergaymers.ca Decadence: Pride Mardi Gras The Vancouver Pride Society hosts a burlesque show and dance party. 8:30pm–3am. FanClub, 1050 Granville St. Tickets $25 for whole night, $20 after-show at eventbrite.ca. Underwear Friday Whether you prefer tighty whities,
Sat, March 1 Totally Outright This annual four-day leadership workshop for young gay, bisexual, trans and queer guys encourages healthy, sex-savvy trendsetters to take part in interactive presentations on gay men’s health over two weekends (March 1 & 2, 15 & 16). Apply at totallyoutright.ca. Singing Can Be a Drag The Vancouver Men’s Chorus hosts two nights of live singing and entertainment with MC Bill Monroe. Tonight at 7:30pm at the Columbia Theatre, 530 Columbia St, New Westminster, and Wed, March 5 at 7:30pm at the Roundhouse Performance Centre, 181 Roundhouse Mews. Tickets $25 at Little Sister’s, 1238 Davie St, and vancouvermenschorus.ca.
Decadence: Pride Mardi Gras — FanClub, Fri, Feb 2
Join the Mabel League Vancouver’s softball league for queer women and trans people hosts a pre-season info night. 7pm. Princeton Pub, 1901 Powell St. mabelleague.com
Sun, March 2 Joan-Eleveneightyone Joan-E hosts an evening of drag fun, with special guests and DJ Mumbles. 10:30pm–3am. 1181, 1181 Davie St. No cover. 1181.ca Oscars Watch the Academy Awards with host Conni Smudge. 3pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. No cover. junctionpub.com Cruisey Cinema & Blackout Sunday Hang out with other pornloving guys in a safe, comfortable porn space. 2pm–midnight. Club 8x6, 1775 Haro St. $10. 8x6.ca
Men on Men A weekly discussion group for men who love or have sex with men. Every Tuesday, 6:30pm. Gordon Neighbourhood House, 1019 Broughton St. checkhimout.ca
Wed, March 5 Mindfulness Meditation Qmunity offers a weekly meditation group. 7–8pm. Qmunity, 1170 Bute St. Free. wovenland.ca/meditation Connect with HIM The Health Initiative for Men offers a space for gay guys to meet other guys, discuss gay life and build community every Wednesday. 6:30pm. HIM, 1033 Davie St. checkhimout.ca
Thursday, 7pm. St Paul’s Anglican Church, 1140 Jervis St. $10 donation partially benefits A Loving Spoonful. timberlinedance.org
Fri, March 7 Leather Den for Men The Vancouver Men in Leather host this play party the first Friday of every month. 8pm–2am. Club 8x6, 1775 Haro St. $10 with VML membership; $15 others. meninleather.ca AJ’s Café Join other HIV-positive gay men every Friday for this free social/support group sponsored by Positive Living BC. 3–6pm. The Junction Pub, 1138 Davie St. positivelivingbc.org
Mon, March 3
Gay & Grey Join this group of gay senior men every Wednesday for discussions on such topics as retirement, housing, dating, selfimage and more. 7pm. Roundhouse Community Centre, 181 Roundhouse Mews, second-floor boardroom.
The Bobbers Vancouver’s favourite queer improv comedy troupe is back in the Davie Village, with a whole new show in a whole new format. 7–9pm. Heaven’s Door, 1216 Bute St. No cover. heavensdoor.ca
Gab Youth Drop-In This fun, inclusive drop-in group for LGBT youth and their allies meets Wednesdays at 4pm and Fridays at 7pm. Qmunity, 1170 Bute St. gabyyouth@qmunity.ca
Tues, March 4
Thurs, March 6
Sun, March 9
Same-Sex Dance Class Vancouver’s same-sex ballroom dance club, Not So Strictly Ballroom, invites you to a weekly beginners’ salsa class, followed by intermediate rumba. 7–9pm. Rhodes Wellness College, 1125 Howe St, second floor. Entrance on Helmcken Street; ring the buzzer. $15. notsostrictlyballroom.ca
Woof Night Less is better at Club 8x6’s bear and cub night. 8pm– late. Club 8x6, 1775 Haro St. $10 members, $15 guests. 8x6.ca
Oliver and Company Screening
Sat, March 8 Tomboy DJ Kasey Riot spins at this weekly queer night for boyish girls, girly girls and girly bois who like girls. 9pm–2am. Heaven’s Door, 1216 Bute St. $5. heavensdoor.ca Gear Saturday: VML Join the Vancouver Men in Leather for their monthly get-together. 9pm. PumpJack Pub, 1167 Davie St. No cover. pumpjackpub.com
Timberline Vancouver’s countrywestern dance group meets every
The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence team up with Van-Pah for a fundraiser movie night. 7pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. $5 suggested donation. vanpah.com
Submit your event listing to oitc.vancouver@dailyxtra.com. Deadline for the March 13–26 issue is Wed, March 5.
COURTESY OF DIAMOND MINX
Richmond Cultural Centre 7700 Minoru Gate, Richmond, BC
PRESENT
March 22 - 30, 2014 PREVIEWS March
Ga Ting
20 and 21
SHOW TIMES: By
Minh Ly
March 20 - 22, 25 - 29 at 8pm MATINEES:
March 23, 26, 29, 30 at 2pm
“FAMILY”
TICKETS: ADULT FEE
$20, STUDENT & SENIOR FEE $15
Tickets can be purchased online at www.vact.ca, at the RCC front desk or by calling our information line at 604-247-8300.
Directed by: Rick Tae Starring: Michael Antonakos BC Lee Alannah Ong DETAILED DIRECTIONS AT
18 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
Set + Costume Design: Christopher David Gauthier Lighting Design: Gerald King Lighting Apprentice/TD: Sean Malmas Stage Manager: Shannon Macelli
thefranktheatre.com
ASL interpretation available March 27 and 29
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
2014 NOV 2013–APR
THE BEST OF GAY & LESBIAN VANCOUVER
Gastown treasures Gearing up for winter The Drive’s organic soul The heart of gay Vancouver
THE BEST OF GAY & LESBIAN VANCOUVER
Real Estate
XTRA’S GUIDE TO THE LUCRATIVE GAY & LESBIAN HOUSING MARKET TO ADVERTISE CALL
604-684-9696
Book your ad now!
Don’t miss the next edition! n! 604-684-9696 advertising.vancouver@dailyxtra.com
P rofessional CAN ADA’S GAY & LESB IAN NEWS
VAN COU VER’ GAY & LESB IANS NEWS
R esponsive
VOTED BEST REALTOR Xtra! Reader’s Poll
I n Touch
Top 10% of all Lower Mainland Realtors - 18 years
D ependable
Former Gay & Lesbian Business Association Board Director
E thical
Donates 5% of commissions to your favourite charity upon purchase of a new home
Award-winning service to the Gay and Lesbian Community for over 20 years
Re/Max Real Estate Services 604.506.4264 s ian@ianholt.com
DAVID TUNG
P R E M I E R
R E A LT Y
Selling Homes In Our Community for Over 20 Years
604.805.0825 | WWW.DAVIDTUNG.COM Knowledge, experience and advice for all your real estate needs
Susan Cameron Bringing you home... with pride! () . susancameronrealtor.com
PREMIER R E A LT Y
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 19
E indexdirectory.ca
Healthcare Services HIM - Health Initiative for Men checkhimout.ca Sound Hearing Clinic 604-687-1488 STOP HIV/AIDS Team 604-838-1331 Vancouver Coastal Health 604-736-2033
Hearing Aids Sound Hearing Clinic 604-687-1488
THE BEST OF GAY & LESBIAN VANCOUVER
Home & Garden Bedding
Dental Services
Mr Mattress 604-255-2113
Aarm Dental Group 604-647-0006
Airlines
Boat Cruises & Charters
Harbour Air 604-274-1277
Waterway Houseboats 1-877-WATERWAY
Daher Orthostyle – Dr Sam Daher 604-662-3290
Addictions
Business & Professional Organizations
Orchard Recovery 604-947-0420
AIDS/HIV Resources AIDS Vancouver 604-893-2201 AIDS Vancouver Island 250-384-2366 1-800-665-2437 ANKORS 1-800-421-2437 Dr Peter AIDS Foundation 604-608-1874 HIM - Health Initiative for Men checkhimout.ca Positive Living 604-893-2200 Vancouver Coastal Health 604-736-2033 STOP HIV/AIDS Team 604-838-1331
Alternative Health Ignite Smoke Shop 778-786-0977 Medicinal Cannabis Dispensary 604-255-1844 My CannaMeds mycm.ca YoGuy Men’s Yoga 778-995-1970
Apartments Capreit caprent.com
Archives Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Art Galleries Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Audio Visual Equipment Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Bakeries Andy’s Bakery 604-251-5667
Beauty Enchante 604-669-9166
Dr Dean Wershler 604-688-4080 Dr Langston Raymond 604-687-1008
West End Business Improvement Association 604-696-0144
Redtree Dental 604-873-3337
Chiropractors
iRepair.ca 778-987-2571
Downtown Chiropractic 604-685-9444
Cleaning & Maid Services The Maids 604-987-5651
Clinics Travel Clinic 604-736-9244
Device Repair
Education & Instruction Vancouver Elementary School Teachers’ Association 604-873-8378 Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Entertainment
Community Groups & Services
Ballet BC 604-732-5003
West End Seniors Network 604-669-5051
Museum of Vancouver 604-736-4431
Community Organizations
PlayLand Amusement Park 604-253-2311
Community Based Research Centre 604-568-7478 Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Construction
Amherst Funeral and Cremation Services Inc 604-831-3023 Valley View Funeral Home 604-596-8866
Home Improvement & Repairs Maison D’Etre Build Inc 604-484-4030
Interior Design
Pacific Coast Massage Therapy – Christopher Robins RMT 604-687-4078 Rick Girardeau, RMT rickgrmt.com
Media Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Men’s Services BC Society for Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse (BCSMSSA) 604-682-6482
Motorcycles & Scooters Motorcycle World 604-582-9253
East Van Graphics eastvangraphics.ca Mail Box Plus 604-683-1433 Minuteman Press 604-572-8558
Poncho’s Restaurant 604-683-7236
Dr Joachim Sehrbrock, Registered Psychologist 604-366-3112
Sex
Psychotherapy Edward Sandberg, Counsellor/Therapist 604-728-6569
Freeway Mini Storage/U-Haul 604-251-2017
Publications Pink Triangle Press 1-800-268-9872
Optical Services Abasa Optical 604-687-3937
Xtra (Ottawa) 613-986-8292
Mail Box Plus 604-683-1433
Scotiabank Dance Centre 604-604-6400
Theatre
Rodrozen Designs 604-558-4443
Laundry Services
Valley View Memorial Gardens 604-596-7196
Bruce Eyewear 604-662-8300
Xtra (Toronto) 416-925-6665
Laundry Valet 604-568-2020
Pet Care
Real Estate Agents
Lawyers
Kitty Kare 604-813-4239
Darryl Persello 604-306-1340
Dahl & Connors 604-687-8752
Pet Stores & Supplies
Ian Eggleton, RE/MAX 604-773-1443
barbara findlay 604-251-4356
Dog Country 604-558-1995
North Shore Law LLP 604-980-8571
Libraries
Happy Pups Quality Pup Clothing 604-770-365
Lyn Hart, Macdonald Realty Ltd 604-724-4278
Vivo Media Arts vivomediaarts.com
Pets First 604-590-7387
Renovations & Restorations
Liquor
Tisol 14th & Main St: 604-873-4117 12th & Arbutus: 604-730-1768 Grandview Hwy: 604-436-3001 Gilley Ave, Burnaby: 604-434-2812
Maison D’Etre Build Inc 604-484-4030
Gallery Café & Catering 604-688-2233
2 Dears and a Queer 604-306-1340
Physiotherapy & Rehab
Joe’s Grill 1031 Davie St, Vancouver: 604-682-3683
Yoga
Martin Brothers Funeral 778-330-7799
Furniture Instant Bedrooms 604-270-BEDS(2337)
Grocery Safeway Davie: 604-669-8313 Robson: 604-683-6155 Urban Fare (Bute Location) 604-975-7556
Hair Stylists & Barbers Enchante 604-669-9166
West End Liquor Store 604-689-3100
Marketing C&C Communications 604-664-8995
Health
Farmers’ Markets
The Dance Centre 604-604-6400
Dr Aaron VanGaver BSc ND 604-629-1120
Vancouver Farmers’ Markets 604-879-3276
Financial Services
Health - Men’s
DeVie Business Solutions 604-298-4148
HIM - Health Initiative for Men checkhimout.ca
Andrea Martens, BScPT, CAFCI Urban Active Sport Therapy Clinic 604-669-8233
Susan Cameron 604-266-1364
Mr Build 604-732-8453
Restaurants & Cafés
Bard on the Beach Shakespeare Festival bardonthebeach.org
Transportation Harbour Air 604-274-1277 Helijet International 800-665-4354
Travel British Columbia Black Rock Oceanfront Resort 877-762-5011 Tourism Harrison 604-796-5581
Websites squirt.org squirt.org twospiritwolf.com 604-688-6648
Weddings
YoGuy Men’s Yoga 778-995-1970
THE BEST OF GAY & LESBIAN VANCOUVER
Gastown treasures Gearing up for winter The Drive’s organic soul The heart of gay Vancouver
Joe Ramirez Integral Counselling 778-227-9423
Couriers
Studio Space
Richmond Funeral Home 604-273-3748
Iosono Counselling Services – Ron Paviglianiti, RPC 604-290-1445
Willow Tree Counselling 604-521-3404
twospiritwolf.com 604-688-6648
Storage
Counselling BC counsellingbc.com
Tricia Antoniuk, MSW, RSW 778-378-2633
Shopping
C&C Communications 604-664-8995
Counselling
Monique Silverman, MA, RCC, CCC 778-228-8456
squirt.org squirt.org
Public Relations
Xtra (Vancouver) 604-684-9696
Maison D’Etre Build Inc 604-484-4030
Lehmann Counselling Service 604-614-8121
948 Denman St, Vancouver: 604-642-6588 2061 West 4th Ave, Vancouver: 604-736-6588 3048 Main St, Vancouver: 604-879-6586
Psychologists
NOV 2013–APR
Felicity Webb 604-721-7537
Funeral Services
Linda Duncan, RMT 604-630-0101
Printing
2014
Accounting Services
Eden Accents 604-523-3433
Massage Certified/ Registered
THE BEST OF GAY & LESBIAN VANCOUVER
Don’t miss the next edition! 604-684-9696 advertising.vancouver@dailyxtra.com
Book your ad now! CAN ADA’S GAY & LESB IAN NEWS
VAN COU VER ’S GAY & LESB IAN NEWS
01_XLV2013-2 Cover indd 1
20 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
XPOSED
Classifieds PHOTOS BY ROB TRINH
Intermediate .Net Web Developer
The Vatican
1 3
How fitting is it that Heaven’s Door now hosts a men’s leather, rubber and fetish party called The Vatican on the third Saturday of every month? As the organizers say, it’s a “play space that’s sure to squeeze a confession out of the darkest soul.” 1E Glen Hall & Mark Jones. 2E Steve Wilson & David Carmel. 3E Jason Athen & Scott Pook. 4E Chris Zupan & Glenn Lombardo. 5E Pete Jarvis, BJ Abramic & Michel Nabon. 6 E Kevin Ayton & his pig. 7E Colin Marcus Jackson & Justin Saint.
4
6
ANNOUNCEMENTS
JOB OPPORTUNITY
2
5
Pink Triangle Press is looking for an Intermediate .Net Web Developer to assist with the design, development and deployment of new features and functions for our Squirt.org website. * Note: This is a Toronto office– based or optional telecommute position.
Come work with us… If you are the right person for this role, you will be a motivated and energetic generalist with five to seven years of experience working on highly interactive web-based applications running in a client/server environment. You are someone who takes initiative, enjoys finding solutions, is detail-oriented and takes extreme pride in your work. You will be able to create efficient and logical databases and employ many different database design techniques. You understand the complexities of designing and developing highly interactive websites for multiple browser and operating-system combinations and possess demonstrated work experience with more than one relational database management system.
* Successful candidates for this position must be comfortable with explicit gay/male sexual imagery.
Visit “Work With Us” at dailyxtra.com for more information.
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
CLARITY IS KEY!
Harold Grant Ross 1948-2014 We mourn the passing of Hal Ross, who died suddenly in his sleep while on a visit to Vienna, Austria. Much loved and greatly missed by his partner Thierry Blindenbacher of Zurich, his two sons Marc and Henri of Calgary, and a large circle of friends worldwide. Cards to Thierry, or Marc and Henri Ross can be forwarded to: M. Borden, 833 Union Street, Vancouver BC, V6A 2C5
Be descriptive and concise. Include all the vital details in your listing to ensure readers have enough information.
HEALTH & FITNESS
DID YOU KNOW? Xtra has the highest reader response when it comes to purchasing products/ services as a result of seeing an advertisement in our publication.
GENERAL
MASSAGE CERTIFIED
RELAXATION
West End Massage
Massage: Relaxation and Deep Tissue
Fully trained & certified in massage therapy & fitness trainer. Text David @ 604-725-0172
MISHU
FULL BODY MASSAGE 604-838-9012 Certified, Experienced.
MR. BALDNÜTZ
Vancouver School of Bodywork and Massage trained / 9 Years Experience
Jiwan from Nepal 604.789.0857
West End
www.RelaxationMassageVancouver.com
RELAXING BODYWORK Because you deserve it. In a peaceful setting in Langley. 9am-8pm Robert 604-857-9571
+:HML + *SLHU + +PZJYLL[+
BE BOLD!
604.767.8625
Bold your line classified.
TRAVEL
PERSONAL
PERSONAL SHAVING SERVICES FOR MEN
ACCOMMODATIONS/RENTALS
EROTIC MASSAGE
MODELS & ESCORTS
HUNG HOMO HOMESTAY : Sleep, Sex & Sightseeing in beautiful Victoria. Short or long term accommodations for gay/bi men in premium suite or 1 bedroom apartment. Separate entrances, private bath, steps from the ocean and Beacon Hill Park. Guests have access to Nasty Pig Playpen and/or can attend Man2Man Sex club orgies 4 x per week. Visit: www.hunghome.com or call 778-265-4190 for details’.
A1 MASSAGE
HOT ASIAN MALE
65% 7
NEXT AD BOOKING DEADLINE: MARCH 5 @ 4PM NEXT LINE CLASSIFIEDS DEADLINE: MARCH 7 @ NOON
of readers are more likely to visit a website as a result of an advertisement they have seen in Xtra.
PROFESSIONAL, EXPERIENCED, DISCREET 4 men only by MATURE male. 9AM-11PM. In-Calls. Student rates. Burrard & 6th. Alex 778-828-4683
Best Bodysage in Town Fit, trained male gives incredible, strong, sensual, relaxing bodyrub. Table.
DON 604.682.6808
Daily to 11pm. Student Rates
TYSON FIT HUNG EROTIC BOTTOM Safe & Private 4 A VERY RELAXING MASSAGE
778-230-0932
VERY GOOD LOOKING great shape, naturally smooth, very well endowed. Please call Luc. Fraser/Broadway area. Private apartment. 604-716-6969
FRIENDS MALE COMPANIONSHIP
Male, young at heart, seeking friendship with a sane, drugfree, financially stable adult. Located in the Tri-Cities. Loves cooking, gardening and a little bit of gambling. Call Bob at 604-492-3026
Travel Companion Wanted
50 yr old HIV Positive seeks travel companion. Wants to travel somewhere warm. 604-440-7632
XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 21
Hot ’n horny hookups.
Join for FREE
Get 5 Days Unlimited access
LAPTOP OR MOBILE
WE’RE VERSATILE
22 FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 XTRA!
VANCOUVER’S GAY & LESBIAN NEWS
MORE AT DAILYXTRA.COM
XTRA! FEB 27–MARCH 12, 2014 23