1
Tungkol sa Pabalat Simbolo ng hindi malilimutang kabanata ng lungsod ang bantayog ng isang bukod-tanging babae sa tabing-dagat. Isa siyang imahe ng wagas na pag-ibig at maningning na mga pangarap na ipinagkatiwala sa paghihintay. Makikitang nakaukit sa baybayin ang mga katagang “hiraya manawari”. May lubos na pananalig sa hiwaga ng mga ‘sana’ na maaaring mangyari. Kaya sa ika-labimpitong edisyon, ang pabalat na ito ay paalala na bawat hiling ng puso ay hiraya manawari.
X VI I THE JOURNEY
ANG PAGLALAKBAY
“
Hinihintay kita. Alam kong darating ka. -Rezie Den Hannah Usop
4
IV 13 Siete 14 Sa’yo, na anak ng Tatlong Bituin 15 Meliorism 16 Is it Now or Never? 17 Soul in Search for Truth 17 I dared the universe against it’s law 18 Pasko 19 If only 20 Puti 21 Mistress or Mother 22
II 45 Isinumpang kalayaan 46 The worse curse I am dreaming of 47 Midnight Call 47 Blind Obedience 48 Fractured Image 49 Busal na Bibig 50 “Pssh” 51 Freedom in Silence 52 The Ambiguity of our Future 52 Hulagway 53
I 59 Treasure hunting 60 Carnage of the lowly 62 The Passerby 63 Minsan 64 Maswer te ka 67 Open Mic 68 No Devices 69
5
talaan ng mga
Hue 30 Kakanå 31 Most Times 32 The Rock 33 Dear Diary 34 Pamatid-buhay 36 Unang Guhit 36 EJK 37 To feel things twice 38 Don’t let those dreams cease to persist 39
NILALAMAN
III 29
Eleana Marie Tabang 6
Amos!
Hayaan nyong ipakilala sa edisyong ito ang babaeng lagi mong nakatatama ng mata ngunit hindi mo kilala, at kung paanong lagi’t laging may mga hiling na mananatiling hiling. Hanapin ang bago sa nakasanayang distrito at sundan ang ating mga hiling sa bawat pahina. Manawari nawa ang ating mga hiraya.
7
Mensahe
Sa ikalabingpitong edisyon ng polyetong ito, pamilyar ang mapang gumabay sa muli nating paglalakbay. Inihakbang ang paa sa sa mga lumang kalsada, tinahak ang daan pabalik sa nakagisnang bayan at iniligaw ang sarili sa syudad na nakasanayan.
PUNONG PATNUGOT
Sinasalamin ng literatura ang kultura ng isang lugar. Ang bawat kanto ay may kanya-kanyang espasyo ipinapasa sa anyo ng mga kwento.
Rachel Ganancial 8
Nakasaksi na rin ako ng ilang mga paglalakbay, nagbakasakali sa sanlibong hiling na pili lang ang pwedeng dinggin, at patuloy na naniniwalang bawat mithiin ng puso ay maaaring mangyari. Isa sa aking mga hiraya manawari ay ang maging bahagi ng aklat na sinubaybayan ko mula sa aking pagiging munting bata. Kaya sa ika-labimpitong edisyon ng The Journey, bigyan natin ng espasyo ang bawat pagbabakasakali. Hayaan natin na pansamantalang saluhin ng mga salita ang mga lihim na hangarin. Sa lahat ng ating mga ‘sana mangyari’, nawa’y marinig, Hiraya Manawari.
9
PATNUGOT SA PANITIKAN
Parang laging nakapaninibago bumuo ng isang mensahe.
Mensahe
Isa sa huling paglalakbay.
12
“ Sana Mangyari,,
11
iv
Naglaon ang mga taon, marami ang naging pagbabago. Naging saksi ang mga alon sa paglipas ng panahon. Palagi pa ring nakikita ang dalaga sa tabing-dagat, naghihintay sa paglubog ng araw. Walang nakakikilala sa tunay na pangalan ng kinahuhumalingan ng dilag, wala na ring nakaaalala ng kung ilang bilang na ang pagdaong ng mga barko. Ngunit ako, tandang-tanda ko pa ang lahat. Naaalala ko lahat mula nong araw na umalis ako.
13
Siete Joax
Tuwing ganito lamang tayo magtatagpo— sa halimuyak ng bulaklak, sa luha ng kandila— nasa gunita, ngunit hindi na kailanman magkikita.
14
Naiiintindihan ko na nang sinabi mo sa aking tayo ay nagmula sa mga bituin: sa alikabok na milya-milyang naglakbay mula kalawakan mahubog lamang ang anyo natin; sa mga batong nahulog upang paghiwalayin ang dating iisang hilaga at timog na lupain. At bago nila tayo basahan ng mga simbolong dapat daw nating paniwalaan — krus, trayangulo at buwan — may mas mahaba tayong kasaysayan kasama ang mga bituing ilang siglo na ang pinagdaanan. Sa parehong bituin unang binulong ang mga dasal sa Bathalang nasa Kaluwalhatian. Sa ilalim ng parehong bituin sumibol ang himagsikan ng mga kapatirang iisa ang kalaban. Sa ilalim ng parehong bituin lumiyab ang mga damdaming inialay sa lupang sinilangan. Sa parehong bituin nabubuhay ang nakaraang dumudugtong sa ating kasalukuyan. Bagama’t may hangganan pa rin ang ating laya at patuloy tayong nakagapos sa tanikala ng mga banyaga, nawa’y ang ningning mula sa ating mga tala ang magpaalala: tayo, na pinagbubuklod ng iisang araw sa pitong libo’t mahigit na isla; tayo, na piinag-iisa ng dilaw, puti, bughaw at pula; tayo ay anak ng mga bituin, at sa mga bituin tayo ay babalik din.
15
Meliorism
Out of the extreme plights and dins Is the country of maladroit A society of villains From the community of toil In the deck gript of circumstance Winced the country leftward behind Under the bludgeoned and stained stance Are retentions unlit, unrefined Come on; call on all the wise men Go ahead and you walk your talk Let the vocals speak for brethren As we move along the kind stalk
16
Is it Now or Never? It reminds how it used to be When everything should be in place Remembering we were in glee When you decided to seepage
In this midst of outpouring tears I was so suffering in vain All this was to drown me in fear And let my hear t withstand the pain
Soul in Search for Truth
The soul in deep molecular restiveness Is the same soul of a prima facie innocence That’s prisoned in the skeletal frame of mind Into which his entire soulful character is in the continuous Pursuit of truth, liber ty and justice that he deserves
17
I dared the Universe against its Law ‘To give is to receive much tenfold back’ Heavens stood as witness, All angels know Know Love takes then destroys, It’s truth, it’s fact How proud was I for Law itself agreed I sat and waited though it took a while It gave me you and took my hear t indeed You captured me with only one sweet smile I offered trust... But you gave air to breathe! And so in humbled knees I star t to pray But ‘soon as I began to hand defeat You took my all and left me lone astray The Law admit I was right all along I’ll be ever damned wishing I was wrong
18
I DARED the Universe against
ITS LAW CharmaineB
Pasko timotingkulot
Hanggang kailan ba tayo magbubulagbulagan? Hanggang kailan pa ba natin ipipikit ang ating mga mata sa mga bagay na ayaw nating makita? Napakarami pa nating kailangang gawin, pero bakit tila wala na sa mga puso natin ang pagkukusa? Hanggang kailan ba tayo magiging makasarili? Sa dinami ng mga luho natin, naisip ba ating may mga tao tayong pwedeng matulungan? Sa bawat mumo ng kaning naiiwan natin kapag kumakain, dumapo na ba sa isip nating may mga batang namamalimos para lamang may makain? Hanggang kailan tayo magpapakamanhid sa mga suliraning ayaw natin talakayin? Minsan bang sumagi sa atin na may mas mahahalaga pang bagay kaysa sa mga paglalakwatsa? Nakita na ba natin ang totoong kalagayan ng mga nasa bansa natin? Nadama na ba natin ang totoong pagmamahal para sa kapwa? Napakaraming paraan para makatulong; kung gusto, palaging mayroong paraan. Ang tanong, hanggang kailan ba tayo gagawa ng dahilan?
19
If Only CharmaineB
If I could tell you I am against You can call me ‘Yellow’ If I tell you I am not ‘Apologist’ fits me so If only one needs not to choose Who tells the truth or lies Instead, to look in deeper truths All Judgments set aside If only one could open his eyes His hear t, his soul, his mind To use the past to lead a life Without leaving a fact behind If I could tell what this poem means In simple words together “To know about History is good, But to learn from it is better.”
20
Puti chi
Minsan mararanasan mong sa daan makipaglaro Biglang hihilain ng pagliko Lilihis sa unang ruta Lulusot sa mga patagong eskinita Palayo sa mamang may pito Sa mga biyaheng asul makikihalubilo “Manong, pasada natin ngayon ay uno.�
21
MISTRESS or
MOTHER lou
She tends to that man, more than she tends to her boys. When her boys are sick, she says, “you can get better on your own.� When the man is sick, she buys all the medicine she can and stays by his side not knowing her presence is much needed elsewhere She shops clothes for her man more than she shops clothes for her boys Her boys only have four different outfits to wear While she spends her money on clothes for a man who can buy them himself She spends more time with that man More than she spends her time with her boys once, just once, she invited her boys on a trip with the man But she and the man left too early and when she got home to her hear t-broken boys, she just reasoned she forgot to wake them up
22
She listens to the man more than she listens to her boys Once, the man got impatient with one of her boys and told her to discipline him and so she did-- at least she tried because the moment her slap was about to reach his face He gripped her hand and yelled at her with all his might. He was fed up with a mother who loved another woman’s husband more than she loved her own children She cried then and told him to pack his things and go So her boy packed them He was ready to go, to leave the hell his mother had made all for a man who would never do the same for her Because, to the man, she is just his mistress It seemed that she loved being that man’s mistress more than she loved being a mother to her boys
23
26
27
28
29
iii
Sa isang karaniwang araw, dumaong muli ang barko, walang nakaaalam na ito na pala ang araw ng muling pag-alis ng binata. Wala ring nakapagsabi sa dalaga kaya iniabot na lamang ng binata ang isang liham sa aleng naroon din sa pampang. Kada hapon ay paulit-ulit pa rin ang paghihintay ng dalaga, puno ng mga pagbabakasakaling babalik ang binata sa harap ng pampang, sa oras ng paglubog ng araw. Walang nakakaalam sa kung hanggang kalian naghintay ang dilag, naging usapusapan sa dalampasigan ang kwento ng dalaga, lalo na ng mga taong naging saksi sa kanilang mga pinagsamahan. Sabi ng iba may lihim na pagtingin ang manunulat, sabi naman ng iilan lubos ang pagmamahal ng dalaga na hindi niya nagawang maipagtapat sa binata.
29
Hue When the noon turned yellow I marched, he was my fellow The light was unbelievably bright It almost took our sight Soon the darkness took over My lover star ted to wander Through the books to theories From mountains down to cities It was then when I knew His voice has the power to renew The rights of our citizen Neglected by the ruling men And when the morning turned red He was gone on his side of the bed But I never felt so alone My lover loved me enough to save my home.
30
^ Kakana chi
Makailang taon na rin mula nang malaman kong hindi ako sinusundan ng buwan sa mga lugar na aking pinupuntahan. Tahakin ko man ang kanan at kaliwa, ang timog at hilaga ay nanatili lamang ito sa kinalalagyan. Tanging paningin ko lang ang nagdadala ng kanyang ganda. Nanatili na lang akong nakatayo, nakatingala sa lugar kung saan mo ako nadatnan. Tinignan kita at pilit hinanap sa iyong mga mata ang magiging puwang ng aking mga salita. Kinwento ko na walang pag-aalinlangan ang ganda ng nag-iibang anyong buwan. Kung saan tila nakikita kita sa pagkakahawig ng mga bagay na gumaganda sa aking paningin. Para bang ikaw ang bagay na bumibighani sa akin. Naghanda ka sa pagtatapos ng aking kwento at dahan-dahang humakbang. Saka ako napangiti kahit hindi ko alam kung sasaglit ka pa rito sa kanluran o babalik sa silangan. Ipinikit ko aking mga mata sa dilim, isa ka nga lang pala estranghero na nagpahiram ng panandaliang liwanag. Natatawa akong sobra ang aking pagkalibang sa ating kwentuhan at pinaganyo kitang buwan na nais kong masulyapan sa magpakailanman. Dumaan ka lang pala na kasunod ng buwan na hindi ko maaaring sundan.
31
Most Times Lou
Most times, she found herself lost in studying people's faces. She'd drink in everything she noticed: all the wrinkles that showed their wisdom; the fine lines that revealed how happy they were; those little details that uncovered whether they thought good thoughts most of the time or bad ones. But always, always, she thought every little flaw and everything that made them who they were was what made people so beautiful and intriguing.
32
The Rock
(An Ode to My Late Grandfather) lou
He was balding But still solid to the core He hung his whit e towel over his shoulder always As if he were at work all the time When all he really did was tend to his roosters— Making sure they didn’t strike at his granddaughter Behind her back, yet failing constantly--And watch WWE--- never mind that an impressionable one was watching it with him. Then snore while sleeping to a telenovela— with me still wondering if it was okay to change the channel at that moment. And if I did—and only when I did— he’d awaken and scold me for changing the show, Even if he fell asleep to it. And on occasions when I did pre-schooler crimes I’d get a whipping from his belt in front of the altar But my favorite moments were when we sat side by side, Silent, in front of the TV, mesmerized by a good show Ahh… papa As steady as a boulder, As resilient as stone that had undergone Years and Years of weathering Who never heard from any of his children Till he lay on his deathbed—lungs pneumonic --- and whose last word to his granddaughter was a laugh Followed by static He laughed because We told him he’d live to be a hundred Because that’s what rocks did He just laughed
33
Dear Diary, Matagal na pala akong hindi nakasusulat, masyado akong nababad sa thesis nitong mga nakaraang linggo. Ang huli ko na lang naaalala ay nong nagpaalam si nanay kay tatay na makikitulog muna siya sa amo nya ng dalawang gabi. Medyo nakakapanibago na wala si nanay sa bahay pero dalawang gabi lang naman, oo at pagkatapos non umuwi siya sa bahay. Hinanap ang pinakamalaking bag sa aparador at namili na ng damit. Matatagalan daw si nanay bago makauwi, hindi bale may dagdag na sweldo naman din daw iyon. Malaki at malamig ang bahay ng amo nya sa bayan kaya hindi naman siguro siya mahihirapan. Patagal nang patagal, hindi ko namalayan na pwede rin palang mangyari na makakalimutan mo ang itsura ng nanay mo. Kahit ang boses niya parang hindi ko na matandaan ang tono. Itong gabi na ito, kinakabahan akong may mas malala pa atang pwedeng mangyari. Ilang minuto na lang ay papatak na ang alas-nueve, wala akong magawa. Nitong mga nakaraang araw nakakapanibagong ang madalas naming paguusap ni tatay. Kahit minsan ay hindi ko naisip na may lungkot din pala sa mga mata niya. Siya na ang bumabangon sa umaga para sa almusal, nahihiya na lang ako na
34
parang magkakasakit akong magising ng maaga. Mapapatanong ka na lang talaga kung nasaan na nga ba si nanay. Nakaraang Sabado, bigla siyang umuwi pero para bang nakapasok ang ginaw sa hamog at ramdam na ramdam ko ang panlalamig sa presensya niya. Nakakatawa na parang nasa loob kami ng teleserye. Nakakatawa na meron palang eksenang nakangiting ihahatid ni tatay si nanay sa gate at pagkatapos ng limang minuto ay pinanyayakap nya kaming magkakapatid. Nakakatawa diba? Oo, nakakatawa na ang sagot lamang sa amin ni nanay ay ngiti sa iilang pagkakataong sinusubukan naming magtanong kung kailan nga ba talaga siya uuwi. Nakakatawa, wala akong maintindihan. Kinakabahan ako, tinatawagan na ni tatay si nanay ngayon. Gabi na masyado. May quiz pa ako bukas at hindi ko magawang magreview. “Ano ba talagang balak mo? Uuwi ka pa ba?” Sana malapit na si nanay, sana matindi lang ang traffic sa bayan. Sana sabihin niyang uuwi siya ngayon at magpapasundo na sa kung sino sa amin doon sa babaan ng jeep. Sana hindi niya na kailangang bumalik doon. Sana wala ng kulang sa bahay. Sana sapat ng si tatay na lang muna ang maghanapbuhay. Sana hindi ito totoo, hindi. Sana, sana, sa marami kong sana. “Sige, umuwi ka bukas sa bahay. Susunduin kita ng alas-otso.” Sana nga may nagawa pa ako bago ko narinig na-- “Oo. Maghiwalay na tayo.”
35
Pamatid-buhay chi
Uhaw na uhaw na ako nong lumagok ako ng luha. Hindi pa sapat at kumatas pa ako ng dugo, hinati sa dalawa. Sige, sa bukas pa ito.
Unang Guhit AnaT
Puro tayo plano, gamit ating talino Lalaban daw sa kontrabando, sa mga sakim at lilo Ngunit tayo’y nakatunganga, ating salita’y wala ring bisa Plano natin para sa kapwa, mangyari sana Harinawa.
36
EJK
Takipsilim Kinakanti na naman ng kadiliman Ang ngayo’y nagdurugong kalangitan. Mapagbanta Ang saluysoy sa lawa Tila lalamuratin ang sigwada Alegro Dumatal na sa pantalan Nabungkal na ang iyong hukay Tanikala Walang kawala Dini na ang huwad na hustisya.
37
To Feel Things Twice lou
Can I somehow buy a ticket to the past? Not to alter it, no, but to simply watch it unfold once more To feel things twice or over and over again Maybe I could somehow obtain a reel of my memories I’d play it the old-fashioned way: on a projector The room would be dark, as the scene of black and white motions would enthrall me I’d sit there by myself, feeling nostalgic as the day went by As the dust, illuminated by the projector’s light, kept floating around me -Never to settle or stay still in midair float There, I’d fall asleep slowly Somehow, from all my wishing the scene to be real again You’d manifest yourself from the movie And step out of the screen-Black and white and all -And into reality
38
Don't Let those Dreams Cease
to Persist lou You over there in your room, or in a jeepney, or at a nice little café, or in school, staring out a window, dreaming of ways on how you can change the world for the better—never stop dreaming. Even when you feel like just a small speck of dust in the universe and even when you think you won’t be able to do anything about the inevitable obliteration of the world and the galaxy—please keep dreaming. Because there are others dreaming of the same things as well. Eventually, in the dreaming, you will star t to do the seeking and so will the others. It is the seeking of goodness in hard to find places that goodness star ts to manifest itself there. See the goodness in another human’s hear t and they will begin to see it and act upon it as well. It star ts with a dream that never ceases to persist in your hear t that the world can change. 39
42
43
44
45
ii
Nakipagsapalaran ang binata sa iba’t ibang lugar at umalis sa piling ng kanyang mga magulang upang manindigan sa kanyang pangarap. Nasa harap ng pampang noon ang binata nang lumapit ang dalaga, bagama’t ilang ay sinubukan niyang magsimula ng pag-uusap na nasundan pa ng ilang mga hapon ng pagkakakilala at pagkakaibigan. Walang nakaaalam ng mga bagay na namamagitan sa kanilang dalawa, lahat ay nagtataka sa kung sila ay totoong magkaibigan lamang. Bawat paglubog ng araw ay pagkakataon upang mabuo ang bawat par te ng kwento. Nagtataka ang dilag sa nilalaman ng buong nobela, kaya paulit-ulit ang pagtatanong nito sa binata. Makailang ulit din ang pagtanggi ng binata at saka nito sasabihin na malalaman niya lamang ito sa araw na natapos na ito.
45
Isinumpang Kalayaan Jhaypee
Buhat ng tayo’y nagkasala Hanggang ang mundo’y maging hudyat Ng pagbabagong sumasalubong sa’tin Iniisip-isip ko kung bakit, paano Tayong nalulumbay sa kabila Ng mabilis na pag-inog ng kabihasnan Iniisip-isip ko kung bakit walang bago Gayong tayo’y tambak sa karapatan Marahil ‘wag lang tayong mabibigla Sa dakong paroon pala’y banging Matagal na sa ati’y naghihintay
46
The Worse Curse I am Dreaming Of If, sooner or later, all of a sudden I will die In the midst of the hardships I’ve long endured Treasure a soil that’s arid of its thirst So we’ll live in the land where you and I were nur tured
Midnight Call Sid
It was night fall, You received a call, Said you should hush, Your pen to halt. They’ll steal your freedom, To put you down. They’ll cross the line, To shut your rights. Yet after these, Your choice, your responsibility.
47
Blind Obedience Noemi
You are free But you are bound To the mainstream bid And a series of traps To uphold the regime, To obey the command If devoid of sound will Is a twisted spot In a tainted society, People fall victims False ideas disguised As blunt truth, cover t ploy A mere submission To the order of who rules Is never honorable Only plain slavery
If you mouth the truth You risk being flayed Still, choose your stand And question all things Your personal moral Don’t let it disappear Exercise a conscious mind Adhere on your own belief For an uncritical suppor t Of a higher being Grants the most ignorant Sor t of legitimacy.
48
Fractured Image
Mi
Flesh and bones That witness time Seen as ignitions For a crime Women aren’t exhibits, Yet so designed Leave your imagination On your mind Her body figure And her skin Are not invitations for Carnal lust and sin They march to the drums Of pointed heels Refrain your hands, You imbecile! She is not A piece of meat For you to buy Or to eat Go and trample Centuries old invalidation These women are Machete wielding heroines. 49
Busal na Bibig Batang Akda
Salong baba sa pag sapit ng umaga Mga taong hikahos tila abandonado na Iyo sanang pansinin aming hinaing Ikaw ba’y walang alam,baka nagbubulag-bulagan lang? Pait ng kadilima’y syang umalalay Pagtahak sa buhay na aming tinaglay Kami ay bilanggo sa sariling bayan May piring ang mata, may busal ang bibig Kami ay mga buhay ngunit di makahinga Sigaw ng katarungan iyong pagtuunan Hindi sapat ang iyong mga dahilan Upang kami ay iyong ipagtabuyan Pagkakapantay-pantay na karapatan Iyan ang mong wag kaliligtaan Aming pagkatok sa bakal na pinto Tanaw sa malayo aninong nag lalaho Sanay iyong dinggin,hiyaw at hinaing Dukha man sa tingin kamiy tao pa rin
50
Halos hindi ko magawang tumingin sa pagewan na takbo ng tricycle naming halos dalawang dekada na nireremedyuhan. Bigla akong napadasal kahit alam kong hindi ko naman iyon ginagawa bawat gabi. Hiyang-hiya ako nong napatanong si nanay kung kanino pa ba siya pwede mangutang. Hindi pa kami bayad sa amo nya nong humiram kami pandagdag sa tuition ko ngayong sem. Nong nalaglag ako sa mga iskolar, gusto na lumubog bigla, maglaho, idagdag pa nito. Ewan ba pero masama ba akong anak kung ipipilit ko pa rin sumama sa Tagaytay para sa tour sa susunod na linggo? halos lahat ng mga kaklase ko ay sasama at sino ba namang tatanggi sa points na makukuha sa pagsasama? Kaso, nilalabanan ako ng konsensya ko. Yung huling pera sa bangko ay dapat sa gamot ni nanay ilalaan ‘yon. Alam kong hindi naman ako mahihirapan ng ganito kung ibinulsa ko lang yung inabot ni Andrew. “Pay diba--”
“Pssh”
51
Freedom in Silence What is it that we are here for? What is this that we enjoy? How are we going to relish every moment? When we are uncaged, freed and liberated But our rights and liber ties are always choice-mandated
The Ambiguity of Our Future
There has to be a constant change Where everything’s eventually altered How long do we have to wait still? Or does it really wor th the wait?
52
HulagwĂĄy Chi
Tuwing sisikatan ako ng araw, nanlalamig ako sa umaga. Bumibilis ang tibok ng puso ko na para bang nagmamadaling tumago bago ko pa imulat aking mga mata. Nararamdaman kong inaabangan niya ang aking pagiisa kaya kailangan kong magmadali. Ibabalik niya ako sa pagkakapikit hanggang sa dilim na lang ang maaari kong makita. Saka niya ako gigisingin sa marahan niyang paraan. Sasabayan niya ako sa almusal at hahainan ng mga salitang dahan-dahang lalason sa buo kong sistema. Sa pagligo ko ay ilulunod niya ako sa kalungkutan kahit nalalaman niyang wala akong kakayahang lumangoy. Hindi ko na ata magagawa pang takasan siya. Kahit na iligaw ko man ay kusa ko pa rin siyang hahanapin. Maraming nagsasabing mahalin ko muna siya higit sa lahat, gaya rin ng payo ng mga magulang at malalapit na kaibigan pero hindi ko inakalang ganito ang tinatawag nilang pagmamahal. Tuwing sisikatan ako ng araw, nanlalamig ako sa umaga. Makikita ko na naman siya, lulunukin ko na naman lahat ng mga pangako niya. Pakikinggan lahat ng luha’t kaligayahan niya. Tuwing sisikatan ako ng araw, nanlalamig ako sa umaga. Haharap na naman ako sa salamin, sa nakagawian naming tagpuan. 53
58
59
i
May isang sikat na dilag noon sa tabing-dagat, kilala siya ng lahat hindi sa angkin niyang ganda kung hindi sa natatangi niyang talino at kabutihan. Lubos siyang kinahuhumalingan ng kahit na sino man kaya hindi nakapagtataka na marami ang humahanga at nahuhulog ang loob sa kanya. Sa tinagal ng panahon niyang nanirahan sa tabing-dagat, nasanay na ang paningin niya sa mga dumadaong na barko at kung ano mang sasakyang pandagat na laman ng mga produkto o dayo. Naging kakaiba ang pagdaong noong hapon ng Sabado, lulan nito ang isang binata na dayo pa mula sa ibang probinsya. Isang manunulat na halos hindi nalalayo sa kanyang edad. Layon niya noong manaliksik sa lugar at bumuo ng nobela na matagal niyang pinapangarap.
59
Treasure hunting N
Minsan may nabasa ako, na ang kayamanan daw ay dapat itinatago. Sa loob ng lumang aparador sa silid ni lolo, Sa malaking baul na sintanda na ni lola, O di kaya nama’y sa lupa. Kasama ng mga nabubulok na bagay, tao at dumi, Mga alaalang isinantabi. Ibaon sa lupa kasabay ng pagkalimot sa mga dating pangyayari. Maaari. Maaaring mayroong isang libo at isang paraan ng pagtatago ng kayamanan. Pero ako, ang kayamanan ko’y sa mga tula lang maatatagpuan. Ikaw ang kayamanang kaytagal kong hiniling sa Bathala. Kinaibigan ko pa nga ang mga bituin sa kalawakan. Ang mga nakaririnding panghaharana ng mga kuliglig ay aking pinakinggan At sa wakas, matapos ang ilang taong pakikibaka sa kapalaran Nagkasundo na rin ang buong kalangitan. Narito ka na Narito ka na at hindi na kita pakakawalan pa Kaya itatago kita... sa pagitan ng bawat salita Babaybayin ko ang ating mga alaala gamit ang mga letrang aking kinabisa at pinagsama-sama Bubuuin ko ang mga linya Gamit ang ngiti mo’t mga tawa Hahanapin ko ang ating mga tugma
60
Dahil mahal, itatago kita sa aking mga tula. Ikukubli ka sa bawat paghinto At paghabol ng hininga Hapong-hapo na ako sa kasasalita at ikaw Ang paghingang aking ginagawa Ang bawat pagpasok at paglabas ng hangin sa aking sistema Bawat pagtaas at pagbaba ng mga tono ng aking pananalita. Bawat abante at atras sa harap ng madla Ay maliliit na paanyaya na kilalanin ang nilalang na nasa likod ng yaring tula Dahil mahal, nakatago ka sa aking mga tula Kung biglaan man akong kunin ng Bathala Ako sana’y may paalalang nais iwanan. Maaaring mayroong isang libo at isang paraan ng pagtatago ng kayamanan Sa loob ng lumang aparador sa silid ni lolo, Sa malaking baul ng sintanda na ni lola, O di kaya nama’y sa lupa Kasama ng mga nabubulok na bagay, tao at dumi Mga alaalang isinantabi Ngunit mahal, ikaw ang aking kayamanan At ang kayamanan ko’y sa mga tula lang matatagpuan.
61
Carnage of the Lowly A violent power structure Manifested in oppressive bullets Steered toward the powerless sector The gullible, the poor
Mi
Paupers fired by unknown vigilantes Bereft of right to clear their names While on counter productivity and conspiracies Elites cannily entitled to due process On the outskir ts of urban oppression We thirst for the slump of syndicated vice Yet the envisioned purging of abominations Now altered to systemic mass murder of the low This is no war against criminality But a strife against the helpless community Shudder as the scene plays out in real time Genocides befall upon both the innocent and the guilty.
62
On the streets, Embodying a bystander You wandered helpless They maim and murder Tor ture is on display Fear metastasizes, You avoid the beast As well as its prey And watched all unravel
The Passerby Noemi
Breath hitched, You have kept quiet But know that your peace Is violence for others How I long for people Who will stop on their tracks I long for humanity Who will do what is right Brazen and bold Conscience intact.
63
Minsan Leo
Ilang oras nang nakaupo si Nolan sa kaniyang kinauupuan. Kakaiba ang sandaling ito. Nagtataka siya kung bakit haggang ngayon hindi pa rin nagaganap ang kaniyang hinihintay. Sa totoo lang, di na alam ni Nolan kung umaga pa ba o gabi na. Kanina pa kasi siya naghihintay eh. Biglang may malakas na tinig na umalingawngaw sa buong silid. Asawa pala niya ito. Siya’y nasa higaan niya. Napagisip-isip niya na ang mga kaganapan kanina’y panaginip lamang. Buti na lang! Inikot niya ang kaniyang paningin. Silid niya nga ang kinalalgyan niya. Agad niyang inalis ang kaniyang pulang kumot at tumayo mula sa kaniyang kama. Lumabas na siya sa kaniyang kwar to at tumungo sa kainan kung saan nakita niya ang kaniyang asawa at ang kanilang anak na babae. Halos maluha si Nolan pero hindi niya ito pinahalata. Lumapit na ito sa mesa, hinila ang upuan, umupo rito at nagsimulang kumain. Nagtataka ito dahil wala pa ring nagsasalita. Nauna na lang si Nolan. “Bakit matabang ang adobo? Hindi mo nanaman nilagyan ng maraming suka ‘no?“ sabi nito sa kaniyang asawa. Natatawang sumagot si ang asawa ni Nolan na so Beth. “Ang ar te nito. Ang dami na ngang suka niyan. Gusto mo ‘yung sobrang asim na. Lulukot ang mukha mo niyan. Tiniis nalang ni Nolan ang umano’y katabangan ng adobong kinakain nito. Sa totoo lang, mahilig talaga siya sa maasim na pagkain. Tuwing uuwi ito sa trabaho, lagi itong may bitbit na isang plastic na Orange. Kaya nitong kumain ng sampalok ng di nagmumukhang umiiri ng bata. Pero sa isip nito, talagang matabang ang adobo ng misis. Para bang ‘di misis niya ang may gawa! Pagkatapos kumain, nagbihis na si Nolan at umalis ng bahay para pumasok sa trabaho. Medyo tanghali na pero sanay na rin siya— trapik nanaman! Madalas talaga siyang nahuhuli sa trabaho niya. Eh palibhasa siya ang pinakamagaling sa kanila kaya medyo pinagbibigyan siya pero alam niyang mali ito. Bigla siyang tinext ng kasama niya sa trabaho na si Gina na si Mayor ang kapapanayamin niya. Bigla tuloy siyang kinilabutan
64
dahil naalala niya ang panaginip. Medyo mainit na ang ulo ni Nolan kasi para bang humaba ang kalsada. Halos walang pag-usad at sobrang bagal. Kinuha niya ang kaniyang earphone at ikinabit sa cellphone niya para makinig nalang ng radio. Pero hindi niya pinakinggan ang istasyon na pinagtratrabahuan niya. Nakinig ito ng FM. Mga lumang kanta! Mga lumang kanta? Lingo ba ngayon? Pero may pasok. Tinignan niya ang kaniyang orasan sa telepono para makasiguro pero Biyernes. May pasok pala talaga! Nagtaka si Nolan kung bakit umeere ang pang Lingong programa sa Biyernes. Lumipat ba sila ng schedule? Wala naman sila sinabing gagawin nila iyon. Nagtiis nalang siyang machining ng mga kantang di niya naman talaga gusto. Lahat kasi ng Istasyon, ganun ngayon Medyo mas mainit na ang ulo niya ngayon. Paano kase eh, hanggang ngayon parang burger patty parin siyang naiipit sa gitna ng trapik. Mayamaya pa ay biglang bumigat nang bahagya ang kaniyang tiyan. Titisin niya na lamang ito sabi niya sa kaniyang isip. Kaya pa naman. Kaunting tiis lang at mailalabas niya rin ang kinikimkim na sama ng loob. Tinignan niya ang cellphone para sa oras pero nagulat siya sa nakita. Isang oras na pala ang Nakalipas. “ ‘tang ina!” bulalas nito. Napagtanto ni Nolan na baka sira lang ang telepono o hindi niya naset ng maayos ang orasan. Kaya tinanong niya nalang ang driver kung anong oras na. “10:30 na ho!” sagot nito. “Putang ina talaga!” “Nagmumura po pala kayo?” “Buwiset kasi eh. Kanina pa tayo dito. Tapos na ang programa ko” “Kaya nga po” natatawang pagsang-ayon ng driver. “pinapakinggan ko po kayo palagi” Nagbuntong-hinga muna si Nolan bago sumagot “Talaga? Salamat”
65
“Eh bilib po kasi ako sa tapang niniyo sa paglaban sa mga tiwali” “Kailangan ko kasing kumilos dahil kung di ako, sino?” Muling natawa ang driver. Ang bigat ng tiyan ni Nolan ay lalong timindi. Nakita nito ang isang Hotel at hinging ihinto muna ng driver ang pagmamaneho. Agad naman siyang pinagbigyan ng kaniyang tagahanga. Dali-daling lumabas si Nolan sa taxi at dumeretso sa hotel. Pagpasok, agad nitong itinanong kung saan ang banyo. Wala raw banyo. “Tang ina! Ano?” galit na may halong pagtataka nitong tanong. “Opo” “Five-star hotel kayo tapos walang banyo?” Naguguluhan na si Nolan. Kakaiba talaga ang araw na ito. Parang may hindi siya maintindihan. Bakit walang tama? Bakit matabang ang adobo ng asawa niya? Bakit luma ang mga kanta sa Lingo? Bakit ang bilis tumakbo ng oras? At higit sa lahat, bakit walang CR ang isang five-star hotel? Bakit? Bakit? Bakit? Lumabas si Nolan. Hindi siya makapaniwala Nag-iba ang paligid. Wala na ngayon sa sasakyan si Nolan. Nagbalik na siya sa kaniyang tunay na kinaroroonan. Nasa isa siyang bodega. Hindi niya ito gusto. Nakita niya ang mga natuklap na pintura sa mga dinding. Naamuy niya and dimi ng mga ibong araw-araw pumapasok sa malilit na siwang. Naramdaman niya ang tanikala na bumibigkis sa kaniya mga braso. Ito na nga ang katotohan. Ito nga ang tunay na buhay. Ang inakala niyang panaginip ay ang bangungot na dapat niyang harapin. Siya ay masasaktan nanaman. Siya ay isang bihag! Bumukas ang pinto na sinundan ng malakas na kalampag. Dumating na kaniya demonyo. Dala nito ay isang nagbabagang bakal na alam ni Nolan na dadampi sa kaniyang balat. At ito nga ang nangayari. Nakasigaw ito!
66
Maswer te ka Na sa tuwing bumababa ang araw ay yumaong alaala mo lamang ang iyong binabalikan Kirot at emosyon lang bukod mong iniinda Wala kang bukambibig liban sa daang pagbabakasakali
Maswerte ka Naaaliw ka pa ng pananagpo ng liwanag at dilim Sapagkat kung maglalaro sa magkabilaan ang iyong paningin Rasyon ng hapunan ang patuloy nilang binabalik-balikan Hapdi ng sinapalid na bituka kanilang iniinda Bukas ay inirorosaryong mairaos pa kung sakali Maswer te ka
67
Open Mic Inanyayahan akong pumanhik sa entablado Sa limitadong minuto ay pinagkalooban ako ng mikropono Sikmura ko ay patuloy na nanlalamig, hindi ako sanay manginig sa madla Sa una kong salita’y narinig ko pa ang iilan nilang palakpakan Hanggang sa kalagitnaan at dulo ay katahimikan ang aking pangwakas Agad kong iniwan ang mikropono sa ibabaw ng lamesa Pababang akay-akay ang mumunti kong piyesa Malalim daw ang binigkas ko sa harapan Halatang walang nakasakay sa biyahe ng aking mga salita Doon na ako nangiti, walang pagngiwi at inis na tinitimpi Kaibigan, ang aking piyesa ay hindi nanlilimos ng hiyaw at palakpak Kailanman ang aking mga linya ay hindi nag-aasam ng kasama Nais lamang nilang maialay sa iisang tunay na kakilala Kung may pagkakataon ay basahin mo ang natatanging gawa ko para kay ama Kalakip ng iilang bagay na kami lamang ng alaala nyang walang hustisya ang nakakaalam kaya kung aanyayahan ako muling umakyat sa entablado’y sasama ako Sa limitadong minuto muli akong magkukwento Hindi ng pag-ibig at ng gasgas nitong konsepto na pinauulit-ulit Kundi ng kirot na tunay na kamasa lamang ang makakapalakpak
68
No Devices Lou
There are some spectacles and scenes That no camera will be able to capture Even if you have tried with all your means To encapsulate the beauty of all those things It will never be good enough It will never show the calmness you felt At that moment as you awakened Or the soft winds that gently blew And enchanted your body with the morning serenity The hues of the dawn as the sun Seemed slowly yawning out of its bed Among the clouds Nor the stillness of the sea As you looked out Some landscapes were made solely For human senses No device could ever capture the feeling Of being alive at that moment No device could ever make you contemplate on the fact That you are a par t of this grand scheme No devices such as pen and paper 69
72
73
74
75
Técag OPI SYA L NA VA LE NT I NE FOLIO
75
talaan ng mga
NILALAMAN
Thee 80 Unfriended 81 See me 82 I, II, II, IV, V
83
Little Things 84 VI, VII, VIII 85 Untamed 86 IX, X, XI, XII 87 Not your happy ending
88
XIII 89 Asylum 90 Forlorn 91 Luna 92 Ayoko ng Valentine’s Day
93
Napanood ko na ang kwento nating dalawa
94
Lab story 95 Sembreak 96 Why? 97 Ambon 98 Nalulunod ako sa ulan
99
Walkaway 100 Found you 101 Sorry 102 No title 103 Last words 104 P.S. 105
76
mga
MENSAHE Sa edisyong ito ng Tecag, ihiningang muli sa pamamagitan ng mga salita ang mga damdaming pilit pinalalaya. Ito ay inaalay sa mga patuloy na naniniwala at nanampalataya sa misteryo at hiwaga ng pag-ibig — ito ang ating paglaya.
yana eic
I used to think love is a blur, a societal concept forced to ram down people’s throats, created through the passage of time to fill in the emptiness of human’s existence. Regardless of how one perceives it with different lenses, just like an army besieged by enemies, it still has to be fought for, as it paints colors to our lives and makes us feel our vulnerability as a life form. No vacillation. No procrastination.
albie
assoc ed
Sa pagtahi-tahi ng mga mahahaliparot na salita makabubuo ng lengguwaheng puso lamang ang makauunawa.
clarK man ed
77
mga
MENSAHE Hindi nasasayang ang bawat damdamin, may ilang inaangkla muna sa sisidlan ng mga pagbabakasakali. Sa edisyong ito ng TĂŠcag, hayaan ang bawat sariling maniwala sa hiwaga ng walang humpay na sana.
chi
lit ed
For the pessimists and realists, the optists and idealists, whatever degree of hopes they hold..
charm
features ed
The mere inclination that people envision their own dreams that they wish to happen is a significant manifestation that of a healthy mind and body to feed the soul dear th of contentment and hungry of relative experiences which will help improve his/her own being.
JP
news ed 78
mga
MENSAHE Para sa lahat ng nagmahal, nagmamahal at magmamahal. Para sa pusong umiiyak, nasaktan at nawasak. Para sa pag -ibig na dalisay at magpalaya. Para sa lahat ng umaasa, pinaasa at may pag-asa.
alexis sports ed
Sa ikalawang edisyon ng tecag, sabaysabay nating ilapat sa malinis na pahina ang itinagpi tagping mga salita na ilang taon nang pilit na ikinukubli sa kaibuturan ng ating mga puso. Sabay sabay nating bigyan ng isang pang sana. Isa pang pag asa. Isang mapagpalayang pagbabasa!
Welcome to the bizarre world of Tecag, a dimension where reality and fantasy are expressed through words and images. a collection of a hear t’s desire.
regina
layout artist
dev
staff writer
Kung fried chicken ang pag-ibig, siguradong gravy ang Tecag. Mas masarap sumugal sa paglamon ng kolesterol ng kalandian kung merong sawsawang malinamnam na tula.
miK
79
chief illustrator
Thee Joax
Can you still remember that night? Along the dimming lights and dust of this suburb, I told you how I could immor talize that moment through words and how they say it could be both a blessing and a curse. This is a testament. We both knew from the star t that we are not going to work out, that what we had is a hopeless case, yet the flame we had that night sparked into something reckless. We grew to be against all odds, although as the week ends we’ll realize our nonsensical actions and try to settle things down to an ending – which of course, a futile act since every week is a failed closure until we finally ended without goodbyes. There were premonitions on our way – dogs howling, cement mixers, and black cats – but I was blinded by the stars, the nor thern lights, and your eyes so bright I was willing to share my soul. I was told you were a bad omen, carrier of dark barrel of secrets from your past, but I already lost my faith in superstitions so I didn’t cross my fingers when you took my hand. Unspoken goodbyes might be better for us because sharing farewells would lead us for wanting more, drawing endless what-ifs on the potential of what we could be. And that made us infinite as we will forever exist on the potent state. We will always stay on the edge of our ideals as we never went to the tiring phase of disappointing each other. We had nothing to lose because we never had something to begin with. Ours was a fleeting euphoria, my closest glimpse to Eden. You introduced me to the unknown version of myself and I am perpetually grateful for the oppor tunity of mirroring my soul. In my pauses, you still remain. I still remember you even in smallest things, from condiments to sweats on my skin. I still find you in between my fingers, tracing your footsteps on the paths we once took together. Every song in my playlist still echoes our memories. You are still the drunk message I wake up to sober in the morning. But this is an elegy for the sunrise and sunsets we pictured; for the wishes we had on shooting stars when we stayed up all night; for the reflection of firework I saw in your eyes when our hear ts once beat in harmonious symphony; and for future we designed that will now only remain on plans. This is my declaration of resignation on the possibility of us, on the probability of an alternative universe where we are the lucky ones, or that in another lifetime, we found our salvation and became each other’s home – because sometimes the most courageous act is to give up and walk alone. 80
Unfriended Jai
The wind’s making a hollow moan As the sunlight’s blinding me Waking up from those gnarled dreams Consternation whipped me with a tremor of a wounded kid. My ghosts skulked around the edges As I fought down a sense of dread Monster won’t stop lingering around me For eventually, they dwell inside my head. But in my dreams, they vanished like thin air Like a mob of candles blown out in a single breath Thus, I found myself all alone in dystopia I learned that they’re my only company and so I called to them once more.
81
See me Hollow eyes And sunlit kisses Drunken lips And faded faces Find me in lost places I bleed love as traces.
82
I. How many people do you need to lose in the process of figuring yourself out? The sad thing was, you already lost quite a few, yet you still don’t know who you are.
I. take me to old libraries let’s engulf ourselves with the scent of old books and love like old souls.
I I. pain washed everything in red with a whole new arsenal of hur t
IV. When will you ever fathom her? She ought to be a modern girl With an old-fashioned, dreamy hear t Love her flaws, love her true For you don’t know how she’d survived To be a battlefield of poetry, violence, and love.
V. “Don’t ask him questions if you’re afraid to hear the answers,” he said.
“Don’t give her motives if you’ll not held yourself responsible for her feelings,” she answered.
- Jai 83
Little things
I can't teach myself to forget, Those every scar, Every pain you had bring I can't lie to myself that everything is all right and hope maybe there's a happy ending Cause somewhere and somehow I will always remember every single bit of it And all of those little things that you left, the day you decided to leave
84
VI. She has a lot of love for you And now that you’re gone She wonders Where would the love go? She looked around the curves and corners And found it on the bed sheets On the shower cur tain The alley in the neighbourhood And in every lane of memory Love may seem everywhere She wished, fingers crossed, so is he.
VII. dito tayo ngayon sa sangang-daang binabalot ng hindi mabilang na buntong-hininga sa laksa-laksang gabing kagaya ngayon sana’y sapat upang anihin ang kasiyahang nakaangkla sa sana balang-araw at baka sakali aasang sa susunod na pagdugo ng langit at palitada ng tadhana magtatapos ang isang kabanata na susundan ng tungkol sa kung paanong ang ako at ikaw ay naging tayo.
VII . Ikaw ang sapantaha ng talubatang pusong nanininwala sa katakata, na sa huli, ikaw at ako, sa isang byahe tungo sa isang walang hanggan na ilang ulit kong hiniling sa mga bituin. Ngunit hindi ikaw ang konklusyon ng pusong napagod na sa bawat balewala, sa bawat ikaw muna bago ako, sa pagkapit at pagpapatawad. Puso’y susuko matapos ang makailang konti pa’t kaya pa, magmamahal ng buo, para sa sarili at hindi na para sa’yo. - Jai 85
Untamed
She tiptoed her way Into your hear t But you stole hers Like a thief in the night She crawled wandering your skin Inch by inch Yet you paint her red Within a sec She treasures Thy rough edges But you cut Her every curve She wanted you for love You wanted her for lust.
86
IX. Don’t call a girl ugly just because you chose not to see the beauty in h e r.
X. There in the sunset was our last goodbye with no chance of another hello. Little did I know I can always find you somewhere between the cracks on my hear t.
XI. Ito nga ba’y bukang-liwayway O manpanlinlang na takip-silim?
XII. You are the redeeming facet in this mor tal peril, the great perhaps in this labyrinth. You are the never-ending deaths and cures. the temporary salvation that bought me a lifetime. You are the battle I won in a lost war, the hero in this infinite fiction. You are my metronome—my steady and endless, the achingly idyllic trick of the light.
- Jai 87
Not your happy ending disgruntled movements timeworn attitude an array of messed up thoughts devoid of eyes a museum of broken dreams and grotesque hope engulf in the shadows tears of blood for an inherited cursed no hear t to mend no soul to save an alive corpse an agony a tale too wretched to retell.
88
XII . At 8, I first saw you as a transferee You were introducing yourself in front. At 10, we became seatmates You were the most annoying one. At 12, seventh grade, you protected me against those bullies Being a weakling, you looked stupid and cool at the same time. At 14, you asked me if I could be your best friend I squinted the whole time to hide the happiness in my eyes. At 16, you gave me a penguin stuffed toy, my favourite I secretly named it after you. At 18, you were my escor t and you are ravishing That moment you held me in your arms, told me how beautiful I am – I accepted the cruellest fate of falling in love with you. At 20, you introduced me to your girlfriend—your first love I can’t stand every moment of it but I did for you And I cried all the way home. At 22, you were pestering me with how-to-move-shenanigans I was trying to work out my love life but there you are and so I’m an idiot again. At 24, we travelled together and achieved our dreams It was when I see my reflection in your eyes that I find myself the happiest. At 26, you told me that you were back with her Just when I was about to tell you the tale of how I love you since 18. At 28, I became a bridesmaid on your wedding I thought I would burst while walking in the aisle, I wished t’was me you’re marrying. As I aged every year, the burden felt a little bit heavier And regrets painstakingly growing. I wanted to be back in that classroom when we’re 8 I wanted to go back and change our ending.
- Jai 89
Asylum We kissed in the twilight it tasted like love and sin. We danced our way on the bed pointing at the stars on the ceiling. We held and caress and felt the world collapse and heal all at once. We scarred ourselves with 2 AM what-ifs and prayed for another lifetime. We dreaded the first crack of sunlight and just like another November 9, you were gone. The girl in white came like always another drug to ease the pain. “I thought you’re getting better but November 9 came and you’re like this again.” I laughed at how pathetic she thinks I am but he’s real and we’ll both be home soon.
90
Forlorn
She wanted utopia But he gave her dystopia. He chose her neck to throttle But love was her gift; so noble. For him whom she can’t unlove Ain’t white, but crimson red—she painted the dove. Cuts were all over her wrist She left him with one last kiss. Woe to all her sorrows, There’ll be no more tomorrows. 91
Luna Joax
Hindi espesyal ang buwan, ito lang din ang buwang nagdaan at lilitaw bukas. Ito ang espesyal: ang ngiti sa labi ang ningning sa mata at ang mahika ng iyong mga salita nang masilayan mo ang liwanag at pagkabuo ng malayong piraso ng kalawakan. At kahit mas malapit pa ang distansya ng buwan sa mundo kumpara sa ikaw at ako, espesyal nang tayo’y nasa ilalim ng iisang buwan sa mga sandaling ito.
92
Ayokong sumabay sa komersyalisasyon ng mga emosyon. ‘Pagkat hindi kita higit na minamahal dahil lamang sa araw ngayon ng mga taong nagmamahal. Hindi ko gagawin ‘yun sa araw na ito — dahil kaya ko naman itong gawin sa bawat araw kahit walang okasyon at selebrasyon. At sa ngayon ay hindi, hindi tayo magpapaalipin sa mga pakulo ni Henry Sy at nang kung sinusino pang ginagawang kapital ang ating mga damdamin, dahil hindi lamang ang emosyong ito ang ipinaglalaban natin.
93
Napanood ko na ang kwento nating dalawa hry
Kwentong hindi tulad sa mga pelikulang isinusulat ni Carmi Raymundo at idinederek ni Cathy Grace-Molina. Kwentong iba sa mga ginaganapan ni Kathryn Bernardo at Daniel Padilla. Kwentong ‘di ko pa nababasa sa mga nobela ni Marcelo Santos at Rhadson Mendoza. Kwentong di pa napilahan sa takilya, pero napanood ko na. Napanood ko na noong araw na tumalikod ka. Isang pelikulang slowmotion, tayong dalawa ang bida. Dalawang estudyanteng minsang umibig sa pluma at sa ‘di inaasahang mahika ng mga metapora, at makalipas ang anim na taon ay muling magkikita. Napanood ko na noong araw na naglakad ka palayo. Sa susunod na anim na taon sa isang pamilyar na lugar ay magkikita tayo. Pamilyar na titig kasabay ng pamilyar na tinig ay itatanong mo, “Nagkakilala na ba tayo?”, hudyat na rorolyong muli ang ating kwento. Napanood ko na noong araw na lumisan ka. Alam kong babalik ka dahil namumukhaan kita. Ikaw yung kasama ko isang dapithapon sa Luneta, magrereklamo ka sa akin dahil sobrang kulit na ni Alunsina, paulitulit niyang ipakukwento sayo kung paano tayo nagkakilala. Napanood ko na ang kwento nating dalawa. Ikaw at ako, sa dulo tayo pa rin ay iisa. Siguro nga’t walang kasiguraduhan ang mga linya pero sigurado akong napanood ko na ang kwento natin sa pelikula 94
lab story mnwr
Sa totoo lang, kasumpa-sumpa ang sem na ito, pero sa ngayon, hindi muna. May nakasalubong ako sa isawan, nakalimutan ko ata lahat ng kailangan kong ipasa sa susunod na linggo. Nasira lahat ng plano ko ng hapong iyon nang ayain nya ako, mag-Chao Long daw muna kami. Sino ba naman ako para tumanggi sa pagkain? Mag-iinar te pa ba ako kung crush ko na yung nang-aaya sa akin? Sumama rin ako agad, kahit narinig ko na sa baul yung joke nya tumatawa pa rin ako. Aliw na aliw ako sa lahat ng pinagsasabi nya kaya sakit na sakit din yung panga ko sa kangingiti. Ito na naman ako sa mga ilusyon ko na sabay kaming humakbang, na baka may ibig sabihin na naman ‘yon. Ramdam na ramdam ko na yung saya ng kwentuhan namin nong bigla siyang nahinto, tumayo at pumwesto banda sa likod. Ngiting-ngiti siya sa katawagan niya at habang tinitignan ko siya ay may kung anong sumasapi sa akin. Nanghihina ako, hindi ko na rin ata mauubos itong sabaw. “Parang ano, ang sakit. “ hirit ko sa kanya “Ano? Anong ano, yung ano ang masakit?” Iba na talaga itong nararamdaman ko, hindi ko na kayang tumagal pa kasama nya. “Kaiba pala mag-Chao Long ngayon, sumakit sikmura ko bigla. Una na ako, ha? Bukas! Bukas na lang.” Hindi ko na napansin kung binigyan nya ba ako ng kaway, basta kailangan kong magmadali. Nararamdaman kong may ibang masakit sa akin at hindi ko kakayanin na makita nyang may kung anong bumagsak pa. Ang hirap magpanggap na kaya mo pa, na ayos ka lang sa kahihintay ng sasakyan pauwi sa inyo. Na kahit mahal ng limampiso sa regular kong pamasahe, pumayag na akong sumakay sa tricycle. Ngayon ko ginugustong lumipad yung sinasakyan ko, uwing-uwi na ako pero alam kong hindi sa kwar to ang diretso ko. Nadaanan namin yung magsasarang gasolinahan, laking pasalamat ko nang nilagpasan yun ni kuyang driver pero nabawi rin agad nang umikot siya at pumila. Nilalamig na ako, gabinggabi pero ramdam ko ang butil ng pawis ko. May apat pang nasa unahan namin kailangan kong kumapit, hindi ito ang lugar para ilabas itong sakit na ito. Bukas. Oo bukas magiging maayos na rin ako. Parehas na ruta lang ang uuwian ko ngayon pero layong-layo na ako. Gabi-gabi ay ninerbyos ako sa bilis ng mga nasasakyan ko pero ngayon, gusto kong isagad na nila yung patakbo. Hindi ko na talaga kaya at mukhang iba ang dasal ko sa gabing ito. Lalo na sa lubak na kalsada, pulbos ng alikabok at sirang tulay na kailangan pa naming daanan, nanggigigil na ako. Malapit na ako sa bahay, oo malapit na talaga ito. Iniiwasan ko na mag-isip ng kung ano-ano pa, sabi nila mas makakatulong iyon. Huling dasal ko na lang ay sana may tao sa bahay. Nagtatalo na talaga itong nararamdaman ko sa loob. Huminto na sa kanto yung tricylce, kalmado lang bababa, kalmado lang maglalakad. Ilang hakbang na lang, kaunti na lang ito. Pagbukas ko ng gate at pagtulak ng pinto, agad ko ng inihagis mga gamit ko. Ang Kapag tinamaan ka nga naman. Napahawak ako sa dibdb ko at saka sa tiyan ko. Sabi ko na nga ba, iba ang masakit. Napaupo sa ginhawa. Sa wakas, ito na nga yung sinasabi nilang “There is no place like home.” 95
sembreak
the lesson I learned after taking the leap of unknown depth is that you won’t save someone from drowning if both of you can’t swim.
96
Why? To someone who made me feel special, Can I ask a question? Why – Why after the staying up all night, you suddenly stopped texting, calling? Why – Why after all the good morning and goodnight messages, you acted as if I was a distant friend? Why – Why after asking me out, laughing at your cheesy lines you treated me like a stranger. Why – Why after all the how are you and be safe, you seem not to care anymore? Why – Why after falling absolutely in love with you, you took a step back off the edge? Why – Why after taming my hear t, you left and star ted making some other girl feel special too?
97
Ambon Sid
Isa nanamang tula, Para sa pusong lumuluha. Isa nanamang istorya, Dulo’y pag-ibig na wakas. Lahat ay gagawin Sa pag-asang makukuha Kanyang pusong pinapangarap. Sasamahan kahit saang sulok, Susuungin lahat ng pagsubok, Yayakapin hanggang makalimot, Dadamayan, baka mapaibig. Anong pag-asa ang sa pusong Akala’y pagmamahal ay laging patas? Anong mahika ang kailangan mo, Para pusong niyang sawi ay makausad? Sa ngayo’y di ko alam kung bakit, Tila kasama ko ang langit, Sa pag buhos ng luha kahit Ito mismo ang sanhi Bakit may pait. Muli-muli ay gaano ba kasakit, Magpaalam sa nakaw na saglit?
98
Nalulunod ako sa ulan Nalulunod ako tuwing umuulan: sa paglakas ng patak na ayokong pakinggan; sa natatagong piraso ng liwanag na kinukubli ng kadiliman; sa mga damdaming bumubuhos at ‘di mapigilan; sa mga alaalang bumabalik tuwing tag-ulan; sa mga salitang minsan mong binitawan. Nalulunod ako sa’yo tuwing umuulan. at sa mga damdaming parang ubo’t sipon —sakit sa tag-ulan.
99
Walkaway Sid
Our time felt so little, When I went my way. My love was never brittle, Yet pride took me away. Sadly, I walked alone, While you linger on my thoughts. For a moment I feel strong, Yet soon I realized, I felt wrong.
100
Found you Sid
If you ever feel alone, Walk with me, For I too, Found a friend in you. If you ever feel tired, Rest with me, For I too, Found strength in you. If you ever feel upset, Sit with me, For I too, Found solace in you. If you ever feel hur t, Come with me, For I too, Found bliss in you. If you ever feel lost, Come with me, For I knew, I belong with you. If you ever feel unloved, Stay with me, For I too, Found love in you.
101
Sorry Sid
I am a woman of distinction, different from any other maiden. I never wanted to feel equal or inferior with another woman. I am pride, I am confidence, I am courage. I am everything I dreamed to be. I am incomparable. So how could you think of me as her equal? You should know how you violated my stand against myself. I am a woman of wor th - so precious, I am priceless. I am rubies, I am sapphires, I am diamonds. I’ve always been better. You should know you don’t deserve someone like me. But stupidity hits, I loved you. How I wish I could love a person away from someone they’ve loved more - and it feels so unfair when I can’t think of anybody as equal and precious as you. Yet still, for you, I’m just like her - a just for keeps, just another person to love. It hur ts because I believe that if we could turn back time, you’ll never make the same mistake of letting her go, even though you knew that soon, you’ll have me instead. I guess if only life didn’t force you to be with me, she’s the last one you’ll let go. Life has never been fair. It seems like no matter how right your decisions were, there will always be regrets. No matter how happy you think you’ve been, there will always be sadness. No matter how you love a person, there will always be pain. There’s no way of taking away the ache from hear taches. It hur ts when you realized that for him, she will always be better. For him, she will always be the girl he can’t have, but would rather have to have. It hur ts because he’s just stuck with you, and after everything you see about yourself, you will always be stuck with the word stuck. I hate you. I hate you because I love you so much, I forgot to love myself. You should be sorry - how could you treat me like this? How could you hur t a woman like me this way? You should be sorry - you have ruined my ideal love story, for a painful journey; and my self-wor th, for an acceptable end. For taking a piece of my hear t just to heal yours, yes, you should be sorry. You might be the one, but for choosing me just because she’s gone, yes, you should be sorry.
102
No Title
This love is the only hell Angels would want visit And with you is the only heaven I wanna be sinful Love, in this perfect crime I found the sweetest of innocence.
103
Last Words Sid
The stars were watching, Our hands were holding, Together, we’re dreaming, Then you said, “Darling, We could have been together, Prove that there’s forever, Be with you wherever. We could have been a song, Where its notes were never wrong, And harmonic, it lasts long. We could have been a tale, That writers love to tell. A story world knew so well. We could have been timeless. Nothing more, nor less, Our love could have been endless.” You paused, I cried. My eyes, I closed, My hope, then died.
105
P.S.
If we could re-live our lives again, And have the chance to keep those people we loved before, Would you make the same mistake of letting her go? And fall in love with me again?
105
Paragon OP I SYA L NA G RA D UAT I ON FOLIO
107
Countdown
Sampung singko Siyam na kwatro Walong taon sa kolehiyo Pitong “pagod na ako” Anim na pagsuko Limang kilometrong layo Apat na hakbang palayo Tatlong semestreng huminto Dalawang kurso Isang siklo Pero hindi nasusukat ng numero Ang ngiti ni inay nang sinabi kong “Sa wakas ga-graduate na ko!”
108
111
112
113
EDITORIAL BOARD Yana eic
Moira Uson
Albie assoc ed
Taylor Sweet
ClarK man ed
Daddy ng bayan
JP
news ed
Ariana Ghandi
Charm features ed Lolli girl
Chi lit ed
Bb joyjoy
Alexis sports ed Bolekang
MiK
chief illustrator Meme lourd
Regina lay out artist
Holy mother of cats
Lulong sa lalaki.. Always may pinaglalaban pero laging iniiwan at never binalikan. Biktima ng fake news kaya nagpa-bangs. Apat ang mata pero ‘di marunong tumingin ng gwapo. Nonstop Taylor Swift ang playlist ng opis kapag siya ang pumwesto sa PC na black. Nasosobrahan ng tubig ang timpla ng 3-in-1 na kape kaya walang pait sa buhay. Nagpauso ng “Hi! Ako nga pala si ----, hinahanap mo raw ako?” challenge nung Intrams. Sobrang lakas ng connection, oks lang kahit wala nang wifi sa opis. Pinakamaraming commitments kahit ayaw pa ma-commit. Kinakawayan lahat ng nakakasalubong, pwede nang tumakbo sa eleksyon.
Tagapagmana ng wisdom ni Ghandi pero he can sing how love is a losing battle, it’s not hard, it’s not hard. Ariana Ghandi sa umaga, Witty Houston sa karaoke. Memorize ang Stupid Love ng Salbakuta.
Sponsor ng lollipop sa opis. Pinakamatinong kausap sa Pio. Kumakain ng burger na walang patty, gulay lang
Manikurista ng Pio pero madaling maka-offend. May ilong naman pero hindi marunong umamoy ng tunay na lalaki. May alagang close-up smile na na-PSU confession pero hindi nag-aabot ng barya sa Multicab. Hindi mo alam kung kasama niyo ba sa opis o lumipad na sa Korea at naiwan ang katawang lupa. Pinunupuno ng Korean Drama ang opis. Iniisip nya rin minsan kung paano natutulog ang crush nya. May collection ng all types of memes sa phone. Talent nyang matulog sa bed sheet na isang taon nang hindi nalalabhan at managinip ng mga masasamang pangitain. Habulin ng guard at suki ng customer service. Once a week lang umabsent sa opis. Ultimate kunsintidor ng mga maling desisyon sa buhay. Laging bitbit ang honorary member 1 ng Pio pati ang barkada nito. Magaling sa extra-curricular activities, title holder ng Spicy Noodle Challenge. 112
STAFF WRITERS Elyssa
Natitirang may malinis na budhi sa lahat ng member. Lagi ring bitbit ang honorary member 2 ng Pio. Walang bad angle sa photoshoot, cute pa rin kahit galit.
Pio angel
Devorah
Hindi pwedeng humiga sa bench sa sobrang haba ng legs. Tinanggihan ang modelling gig sa Thailand dahil takot sa high heels. Patago makipag-holding hands, kinabog ang lablayp ng lahat.
Mahatma Landi
Tim
Kaya kang alagaan kahit may bulutong ka. Nagiging athlete mula CEAT hanggang CCJE para sa bond paper.
Bondpeyper boi
Britt
Nakakapasok ng gate kahit hindi naturally blonde. Aesthetically pleasing ang insta feed. Kayang irampa ang buhok ni Kim Bok Joo
Walking instagirl
Jamaica
Laging naka-stockings kahit summer. Requirement ang braid kahit ma-late. #OOTD saFB pero iiyakan ang kanta ng ExB.
Moana o na na
Jesseth
Representative ni Fifi sa lahat ng beauty pageant. Kayang i-balance ang DL standing sa engineering pati org duties. Walang bilbil, pwedeng bumili ng t-shir t sa children’s section.
Kween
Ryan
Kayang pagsabayin ang walwal at pag-aaral. Laging may baon na tito joke. Kuya ni Umaru-chan.
Pakboi
Karl
Pinaka-friendly sa lahat ng member ng Pio. Magaling maghanap ng friend sa katauhan ng mga qt. Wanted sa opis.
Legendary pakboi
Christopher Holy ghost
Joyce Missing ghost
Seth Pio model
Ayon sa alamat, nag-e-exist daw ito sya. Magaling magsulat kapag may deadline. Iilan palang ang mapalad na nakakikita sa kanya. Kung sino man pong nakakilala kay Joyce, pakisabi “umuwi na sya, hindi kami galit”. May libreng walang bayad free kiss din sya kay Fifi the Bearcat.
Direct descendant ni Karl Nierva. Laging may photoshoot kung pumorma. Tambay sa mga spoken poetry competition. Aakbayan ka kahit ‘di pa kayo close. 113
KULTO NI FIFI PAHINA NG MGA PASASALAMAT AT PAMAMAALAM
First of, Thank you Pio Peeps sa pagtanggap sa akin at naging par t kayo ng college life ko for the last 4 years. Minsan kahit hindi ako masyado nagpapakita (minsan lang ba?) at nagpapafeeling ar tista sa paghahabol nyo sa akin, tinitiis nyo parin ako. Di ko talaga makakalimutan yung mga overnight stays natin sa PETAL. Kahit nakakastress yung pagdrawing ng tuloy tuloy , go lang go kasi alam mo may Free travel pag may contest.(Lol) Though truth be told, alam ko i wasnt the best member you could hope for so let take this oppor tunity to say sorry. Once again, thank you for the oppor tunities and learnings Pio Peeps. Adios! Swswswsw Shout out pala kay karl nierva na dinamay ko sa pagsali. Kung saan ka man ngayon, sana masaya ka. :’)
4
years
Justine artist
Over and almost done with the contestation of both pleasurable and trying times in the academe, I would like to invoke the principal contribution of the following who/that helped me with all the histrionics of the growth of my life as a student in this institution: Family members from both the consanguine and affine por tions for the love and suppor t, friends and acquaintances for the suppor t and memories that will linger deep in my hear t, my first home Political Science Parliament and the whole clan of Pokemons for honing my leadership skills to prepare me for years future unwanted leadership oppor tunities, teachers JP and mentors (you know who you are) who gauged news ed and taught me the things I needed to learn, fellow student-leaders for the inspiration, the Piopeeps of Pioneer Publication for an extraordinary friendship and blissful memories through the years, campus crushes who became inspiration, sidewalk vendors who pacified my hunger when class schedules require no lunch and most of all, sa makagagaem nga Dios i ang kalibotan. Matamang salamat kanindong tanan. Adios!
3
114
Naikintal na sa kokote ko na kapag may nagawa sa iyong magandang bagay lagi kang tumugon ng “Salamat” Isang salita na maaring ipagpakahulugan ay pagbigay-tugon sa par tikular na nagawa sa kabilang banda maaari rin itong ipakahulugan sa salitang “Paalam” Ngayon ko lang napatunayan na ang dali palang pumasok sa isang lugar at ang pinakamahirap na par te ay ang paghihiwalay mo sa lugar na iyon dahil kailangan mo nang pumunta sa isa pang dimensyon ng buhay na kung saan ang magiging kaibigan mo ng mga pagdududa at walang kasiguraduhan. Salamat, isang salita para sa maraming dahilan. Isang salita, para matakpan ang napunit na kalungkutan.
3
years
ClarK
man ed
Parang por tal ang opisina, kapag pumasok ka sa loob nagkakaroon ka ng bagong mundo . Parang pumapasok kami sa iba pang mundo. Pakiramdam ko pinaliit ang mundo para makilala ‘yong mga taong halos kaparehas ng buhol ng bituka, ng kulay ng budhi at ikot ng utak na hindi madaling mahanap sa buong campus. Ipinagpapasalamat ko ang mga taon na years inampon ako sa loob, sa lahat ng naranasan, napagChi aralan, napagtsismisan at ipinaglaban. Mami-miss ko gawing bahay at classroom ang opisina kaya lit ed hindi ako mahirap hanapin. Sa kalat ng opisina na nagpapalakas sa amin, ang pamanang kutson. Saulado ko ang buong opisina kahit sa panaginip. Salamat sa mga titas sa loob, sa mga nanatili sa opisina kahit hindi na kami muling kinabitan ng internet. Sa paninindigang pagsabayin ang acads, harot at pub, mahal na mahal ko kayo. Sa maskom fam na kapitbahay lang ng opiz, sa mga instructors ko na naiitindihan ang aking pio life, kahit mukhang hindi lang journalism ang major ko. Sa hayskul friends, sa college barkada na alam kung saan ako hahanapin. Sa PPS-SP, sa buong supor ta at mga unang Sabado ng bawat buwan. Sa Petal fam sa palagiang pagsalba at kay ate Chat na saksi sa aming hayskul to college journey sa Petal. Syempre sa nanay at tatay ko kahit napapagod na sila makinig sa lahat ng palusot ko, pati na rin sa dalawa kong kapatid. Sa mga maling desisyon ko sa buhay, sa universe, sa kaitaasan at lahat ng mga alaala. Maraming salamat!
4
115
4
years
It is easier to write anything provided you have words, but harder to write something that is wor th reading. Every writer struggles to weave words together in the hope of informing his reader. I do not intend to wear the cloak of hypocrisy that writing is a piece of cake to swallow in joyous hurrah, because I just like the rest had been subjected to its difficulty. Pioneer has not just been my writing niche since my freshman year, but also became my home. Its corners became a witness to how I cried over sentences I failed to perfectly write, and braving through the ar t of telling stories despite the headache and an excruciating butt pain. It also became a witness to my hear tbreaks, my superficial drama, and all of my brouhahas. One of the perks of being a Pioneer scribe is having the chance to meet other writers in other schools as well, who also toil hard if only to shine the light for the understanding of the studentry of the issues both in campus and
Albert
assoc ed
national set-ups. Pioneer also rendered me the chance to attend confabs outside Palawan. Because of this, I saw theimpregnable passion and criticality ofmy fellow campus journalists’ in ferreting out the truth in all forms, which transformed me from being a hopeless nonchalant onlooker into a mobilized par ticipant. In 2014, I took and passed the entrance exam. But the journey does not wind up in seeing my name included in the roster of campus journalists in the university. Taking and passing the Pioneer’s entrance examination is one thing, while going into the field to write is completely another story. Being in Pioneer means a responsibility to always keep yourself abreast of the new and the bold stories and to keep your eyes peeled on events, to tell others what you know. I, and the rest of the organization, also had doubts of what we will write about. Will we just focus on the university stories, or will we also go beyond the PSU gates to tell you the narratives of the voiceless? Will we conform to our organization’s dogma, or will we devise our own to fit the needs of the present campus set-up? I will miss the Pioneer’s silence at night, especially during our overnight pressworks. The way we fought with the guards on the off chance we might be allowed for time extension after 10 p.m. The keyboard I hardly pounded in manifestation of lexical frustration. Its couch that reeks of decades of accumulated sweats. The walls tainted with scribbles of history. The ghost stories that sent shivers down my spine. Most of all, our purpose: to write about the issues not just for campus but also for national scope --- no matter what the stake is. It seems to me it was just yesterday when my journey began. I was 15. I did not know all that I had to fight for then, as I also was in search of my purpose in my stay in the university. But as I slowly immersed myself with the Pioneer’s creed, my life completely changed. For one, it taught me there is a fight outside our classrooms. Some die with their eyes wide open of hunger, while some in the echelons of power rest their backs on the money they stole from people at our expense. And most of the time, we just blankly stare. What did we do then? To make ripples of change in the pond of uncer tainty when the universities, whose existence is funded by taxpayers, are full to the brim with stingy politics.
116
At least, we tried within my capacity to raise consciousness to my fellow students. Shoutout to Regina who I always have the confidence to share my experiences with. To Eleana and Rachel, who I always love to talk to for serious aneks. To Clark, who always has something up in his sleeves for fun. To Milcah, who I commend for her stark wittiness. To Alexis, for always hearing me out for my academic problems. To Elyssa for making me feel I am her Kuya. To Ate Jesseth, for not being hesitant in sharing to me her chika’s in life. To Charmaine, who I miss drinking coffee and talking with. To Devorah, who became a close friend because she’s always open to me. And most of all, to John Paul Favila, who has been a witness to all my victories and losses, my best friend. My stint as associate editor has just come to a close. As I write this plethora of gratefulness, memories rush back in uncontainable waves, and yet I still feel that the journey of our organization to the attainment of genuine campus freedom is like rocking a big boat in the coastline. Some people still give us cold shoulders for the ar ticles we write, while some just are just forcedly oblivious to our existence’s purpose. There are not perfect sentences to repor t the campus struggles we braved when the monsters insisted with impunity that we vehemently used the students’ funds for causes it was not intended for. I know I am not the best writer. I both lost and won in journalism competitions. But I hope I effected a sense of awakening through my writing, no matter how miniscule I think its effect was. But I still hold on to the conviction that Pioneer hasdecisively disturbed and educated the monsters of the students’ struggles, while the monsters defiantly rolled their eyes in disbelief. We reminded them that we advocate for the true and productive causes, and we cared not of their red flags because we knew our identity; Pioneer has rocked the monsters’attempt to stifle dissent and criticality in the campus. We may not have completely delivered all that were expected of us, but at least we still did our best in the hope that we have gained the students’ respect. We stood firm and hobbled along. And we will always hold people accountable, no matter who they think they are. We are biased, yes, as objectiveness is a myth, in favor of the students.
4
years
Jesseth
features writer
In my 4 years in this publication, I encountered a lot of brilliant people, competed with a lot of my peers, and celebrated with my friends. Looking back, I never thought that I would be able to achieve so much. This publication has helped me to become someone who is not afraid to take on bigger challenges in life. Thank you, Pio.
117
First year college was my most active year in Pioneer and during those days was I closest to the writer inside me. I may have spent the rest of my years in college not as active as I used to be but how I began to weave my hear t into words not only for my sake but with the drive to enlighten is something that I owe to the publication. I star ted out as a clueless freshman who was apathetic of societal dillemas however Pioneer apprised me the significance of truth and lit my interest for the weak ones. I will never forget how a regular meeting suddenly made the four-walled office seemingly small for an ocean of personalities— everybody had substance and was imbibed with a sense of justice. Not all journeys should be walked on yet as I finally exit the university and enter the precipice of life, I believe that Pioneer will always be one wor th taking.
Karl
photojournalist
3
years
4
years
Noemi
literary writer
‘Three years of college journalism: How I acquired all my ar tistic skills’. That’ll probably be the title I’ll choose if I wrote a book about my time here at Pioneer (ito yung tipong libro na makapal lang ang cover kasi hardbound pero manipis lang ang laman at maiinis na lang ang bibili kasi parang naloko sila). Jokes aside; the experience, knowledge, ideas, and skills I’ve learned through this band of ridiculously talented misfits (jk jk) could totally fill a book. Ang daming nangyari sa buhay ko sa Pio; naging photojourn ako ng wala sa oras (sa pagkaalam ko writer dapat ako eh); nag-layout at napasali sa contests kahit ‘di pa ready. Pioneer Pub ang isa sa highlight ko sa college. Di ko kayo makalilimutan. If given the chance, I’ll try not to be a lazy f*ck tho. Thanks a lot Pio fam! (Lalo na sa crush ko sa Pio, ingat ka mwah)
118
Pasasalamat sa’yo na dahilan ng aming mga hiraya
119
Hiraya Manawari
120
2017-2018 2nd Floor, CCJE Building Palawan State University-Main Campus Tiniguiban Heights, Puer to Princesa City Palawan, Philippines All Rights Reserved Cover Design by: Milcah Lagumbay THE JOURNEY is the official literary folio of the PIONEER Printed by: Petal Printhub Solutions Inc. Fernandez St., Puer to Princesa City No par t of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Editorial Board. The Editorial Board reserves the right to screen, reject or edit ar ticles submitted for the publication. Member: COLLEGE EDITORS GUILD OF THE PHILIPPINES
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Eleana Marie Tabang • ASSOCIATE EDITOR Albert Villamor, Jr. • MANAGING EDITOR John Clark Bungay NEWS EDITOR John Paul Gabinete Favila • FEATURES EDITOR Charmaine Balisong DEVCOMM EDITOR Devorah Claire Usop LITERARY EDITOR Rachel Ganancial • SPORTS EDITOR Alexis Fernandez CHIEF ILLUSTRATOR Milcah Lagumbay • LAYOUT ARTIST Regina Gruzei Catbagan SENIOR STAFF WRITERS Timothy Gemar Fagut, Karl Michael Nierva, Jamaica Pedere, Elyssa Gene Vasquez, Jesseth Nez Pasagad, Brittny Lourde Trinidad, Noemi Camaso ILLUSTRATOR Ryan Justine Manreal • STAFF WRITERS Christopher Odin Legaspi Villegas, 124 • ADVISER Prof. Ralph Pulanco Joyce Ann Pe Yap, Jaime Pagadora Cabrigas