Spring 2015 Issue 2

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PIPE DREAM Friday, January 30, 2015 | Binghamton University | www.bupipedream.com | Vol. LXXXVII, Issue 2

East Gym takes swing at upgrading wing For fall 2015, a FitSpace renovation signals beginning of equipment overhaul

David Zeiger

Contributing Writer

late start leads to later finish

Finals week slated to begin the day after end of classes

Guests entering the East Gym this semester will notice a major equipment change: The alcove next to the cardio machines, which used to contain the Hoist machine line of workout equipment, now contains a large jungle gym-like contraption surrounded by cryptic diagrams on the floor.

This new training system is called the Synrgy360. It includes a boxing heavy bag, staggered monkey bars, battle ropes and a series of bars for dips and pullups. Markings on the floor provide visual cues for exercises that do not require the new equipment like long jumps and activities with medicine balls.

The Hoist machine line that used to be in this space has been moved next to the free weights to replace the Cybex machines, which have been traded back in to the provider for a discount on the new equipment. Jenna Moore, assistant director of fitness and wellness for Campus Recreational Services, said that it was inefficient to have two full sets of weight machines.

“Functional training zones and equipment like the Synrgy360 are becoming popular in many high profile fitness facilities and universities across the country,” Moore said. “We decided to offer something that

Pelle Waldron

Pipe Dream News The Academic Affairs office recently released the fall 2015/spring 2016 academic calendar, surprising many students with an extra-late finals week and an elimination of any sort of reading period.

According to the calendar, fall 2015 classes will end on Tuesday, Dec. 15, and final exams will commence immediately afterward on Wednesday, Dec. 16. Finals week will go until Dec. 22, and residence halls will close on Dec. 23.

Donald Nieman, provost and executive vice president for academic affairs at Binghamton University, said that there are parameters to follow when making the schedule, and it is difficult to balance everything. These guidelines, set by the United States Department of Education, regulate credit hours, student class time and outside-of-class work.

Dassie Hirschfield/Contributing Photographer

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Cassidy Chen, a sophomore majoring in electrical engineering, uses the new training system called Synrgy360 in the East Gym. The new jungle gym-like construction has a boxing heavy bag, staggered monkey bars, battle ropes and a series of bars for dips and pullups.

Through crowdfunding, Slam Poetry hits the road BU's chosen poets look online for funds to attend national competition Emilie Leroy

Pipe Dream News

Teams from more than 50 schools across the United States will go headto-head in front of audiences at Virginia Commonwealth University. But they won’t be vying for the ball — they’ll be duking it out with words.

The Binghamton Slam Poetry Club is raising money through online crowdfunding site Indiegogo to attend the 15th annual College Unions Poetry Slam Invitational (CUPSI), a performance poetry competition among groups from colleges across the U.S. from March 25-28. This is the first year the club plans to attend. As of Thursday night, it had reached its $1,000 goal.

At a slam, poets from each team perform an original piece individually or in a group. To eliminate bias, performances are scored by judges picked randomly from the audience.

For slam poet Lindsay Young, a junior majoring in psychology, the randomness of the judging creates a challenge for performers.

“When it’s random people, you have to work more on the performance aspect to grab the average person’s attention,” Young said.

During a slam competition last semester at Late Nite Binghamton, Young, Daniel Roman, Maryam Haque, Tom Costello and Anna Szilagyi won the five spots to represent the dozens of members of BU’s Slam Poetry Club at the competition.

TEDx looks for student inspiration Directors to start search for undergraduate voice at talk Zachary Wingate Staff Writer

Poems at CUPSI are limited to three minutes, with judges scoring performances from 1-10 based on their physical presence, voice, articulation and writing. Performers cannot use music, props or costumes while performing.

Teams with the most points move on to the next round of competition.

The Binghamton Slam Poetry Club has competed against other schools at smaller slams and plans to attend others, such as the Wade-Lewis Poetry Slam Invitational at SUNY New Paltz in March, to prepare for CUPSI. For the five poets representing the

Binghamton University students have seen Bitcoin developers, award-winning writers and feminist bloggers speak at TEDx Binghamton. But this year, one of BU’s own will take the stage and try to open the minds of his or her peers.

Technology, Entertainment, Design talks — better known as TED talks — are a global series of conferences based on the slogan “Ideas Worth Spreading.” TED talks are independent events given license by TED to help spread their mission.

Traditionally, TEDxBinghamton has invited speakers to the University to share their ideas, but this year will usher in change.

Starting Monday, the BU student-

See SLAM Page 2

See TEDX Page 2

It takes a special kind of bond to be comfortable sharing your personal work with someone — Daniel Roman Club president

See FALL Page 2

Tycho McManus/Managing Editor

Pictured: gabriel sayegh, guest speaker on the war on drugs, at last year’s TED talk. This spring semester Binghamton’s student-run TEDx organization has decided to host a competition to give one BU student the chance to bring to the stage an “idea worth sharing.”

Microsoft Office: free with B-Mail With new agreement, students and faculty can access programs Stacey Schimmel Contributing Writer

Beginning this semester, Binghamton University students and faculty will no longer have to trek to the Pods to put those last-minute touches on papers, presentations or projects using Microsoft Office.

Office 365 Education for Students, which includes Word, Excel, PowerPoint, Outlook, OneNote, Publisher and Access, will be available to current students and faculty free of charge. The users are monitored by the school with help from

Microsoft, which will validate that the people using the software are students or staff members of the University, and that it was installed for use with school-related content.

According to Denise Dedman, Help Desk manager for Information Technology Services (ITS), users can install the Microsoft Office suite on up to five devices including PCs and Macs, iPads, iPhones, Android phones and Windows tablets. The program can be downloaded online through the ITS page on the BU website.

Dedman said that the program is something that has been long-awaited.

“A lot of students have always come here and asked us for Microsoft Office and we didn’t have it available before, so this is new,” Dedman said. “It’s something that Microsoft is offering to the University.”

According to Logan Robinson, communications manager for ITS, the suite is available after an amendment to ITS’ Microsoft Campus Agreement, which was renewed this year. The renewal expanded access to software at no additional cost.

He said the change will help students, who no longer have to convert Microsoft

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NEWS

www.bupipedream.com | January 30, 2015

BU professor attempts Excel, PowerPoint offered free to BU to harness oxidation SUITE continued from Page 1

Guangwen Zhou's research suggests rust is not a must Habin Kwak Staff Writer

Engineers and architects have long faced the challenge of the inevitable onset of oxidation — the interaction between chemical compounds and oxygen that is directly responsible for the rusting of metals. One professor at Binghamton University, however, has recently uncovered information that may stall this process in certain metals.

Guangwen Zhou, an associate professor of mechanical engineering at BU, partnered with Peter Sutter from the Center for Functional Nanomaterials to conduct his research. The two have been working together since 2013, and their findings were recently featured in the Journal of Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

Zhou had previously been investigating rusting for over 10 years, due to its relevance to mechanical engineering. He said rusting metals has been detrimental to the economy and is a pressing issue that must be resolved.

“Corrosion-related damage costs more than 3 percent of United States GDP,” Zhou said.

“Resistance to corrosion or oxidation is therefore one of the most important properties for materials.”

The research centered around nickel-aluminum (NiAl) because its uneven surface makes it particularly prone to erosion from outside elements.

Sutter and Zhou used a lowenergy electron microscope (LEEM), which operates by shooting a beam of electrons at an object to map an image of its surface, to effectively observe changes in the metal’s surface during oxidation.

The research contradicted previous notions that a metal’s uneven surface was unrelated to corrosion. Zhou and Sutter discovered that elevations could actually impede metal corrosion.

“Atomic steps — a defect common to crystal surfaces — are typically considered as active sites for surface oxidation,” Zhou said.

“In contrast to this view, we found that the presence of certain atomic steps can play a significant role in inhibiting the process of oxidation in its tracks.”

Liang Li, a second-year graduate student and assistant to Zhou, explained that the goal is not to entirely stop the process.

“Oxidation is not always undesirable,” Li said. “It can also be utilized in various technological areas. Therefore we are not always ‘combating’ oxidation. Instead, we are trying to ‘harness’ it. To do that, we first need to understand how it happens in the first place, which is the primary goal of our research.”

Furthermore, Li said he was optimistic about the future of the team’s research in light of constant technological innovations and their ability to make monumental discoveries.

“I believe that in the near future our research results can be further utilized in technological applications, either to help prevent undesirable corrosion or to facilitate the synthesis of functional oxides,” Li said.

documents to different versions or worry that they are not compatible.

“Another benefit to having this available for everyone with a BU email address is that it allows for everyone to have access to a common collaboration platform,” Robinson said.

Jeremy Di Luzio, a junior majoring in psychology, said that having Microsoft Office would allow him to collaborate

Photo Provided

launching several pilot projects this spring, including color printing that can be available through students’ print quota.

According to Robinson and Michael Hizny, assistant director of networking, ITS staff are happy about the change.

“It is both exciting and convenient that students will have access to the latest version of the Microsoft Office once they become a student here at Binghamton University,” Robinson said.

Gabrielle Kohlhagen, a

sophomore double-majoring in financial economics and philosophy, politics and law, said that she hopes future students are made aware of the initiative before arriving to BU. “I think it would have been positive if it was done before students actually start school, because by the time the school year starts most students are equipped with these programs,” Kohlhagen said. “If I would’ve known earlier, I probably would have waited and taken care of it here.”

Student sought to take stage at campus TEDx TEDX continued from Page 1 run TEDx organization will host a competition to select one undergraduate student to speak on a topic of his or her choosing.

According to Stephanie Izquieta, a senior majoring in philosophy, politics and law and one of the directors of the organization, the requirements are still being discussed, but will include a personal statement explaining the student’s interest in speaking.

“We want someone, anyone, to come and say ‘this is my passion, and this is what I really want to pursue, and I want to share this with not just us in the Binghamton community but with the TEDx community,’” Izquieta said.

According to Izquieta, applications will be available through TEDxBinghamton’s social media page and the BU Listserv.

Fellow director Gina Kim, a senior majoring in integrative neuroscience, said all are welcome.

“We want to make this an open pool where everyone has an equal opportunity,” Kim said.

“Who am I to say that a talk about advancements in stem cell bio is better than the questions of what the next art movement is?”

According to Izquieta, the candidates will be narrowed down by the quality and originality of their topic as well as by how they fit with the rest of the day’s speakers.

“If you are chosen, one of the requirements is to go practice at

the Speaking Lab,” Izquieta said.

“If you are going to be a student speaker representing Binghamton University, we want you to do a great job and [be prepared to] throw all the support we can at you.”

Although previous organizers considered having a student speaker, it was until this past summer when Izquieta worked with another TEDx organizer at New York University that the idea became a reality.

“We couldn’t do it last year, but this year I was thinking about it over the summer and I actually got in contact with one of the organizers over at TEDxNYU and they actually have something called ‘The Pitch,’” Izquieta said.

“We traded ideas, reiterating

TED’s mission of ‘ideas worth spreading.’”

A student speaker is not the only change to this year’s conference. According to Kim, two speakers will share the stage for one of the talks, something that has not happened before at a TEDxBinghamton event.

Izquieta, who has worked with the group for three years, said she encourages everyone to step out of their comfort zone and apply to be a speaker and come to the TEDxBinghamton event in March.

“The cool thing is it humanizes these ideas in a way where it’s accessible to people,” Izquieta said. “If we can get one student after leaving our conference to go Google anything they’ve heard, we accomplished something.”

Gym trades old machines for new look GYM continued from Page 1

Pictured: Guangwen Zhou, an associate professor of mechanical engineering at BU. His research on oxidation may have revealed a way of both hindering and harnessing the process for technological and economical gains.

and complete assignments at his convenience, instead of needing the Pods. He prefers Microsoft Word because the other word processing programs make sharing difficult.

“Usually I use the Pods computers, the Macs, but now I don’t have to go to the library and have it be a hassle while I’m waiting for people to get off them,” Di Luzio said. “I can just do assignments on my own computer, which is awesome.”

ITS is in the process of

was completely different than all the other equipment we had so our members could continue to expand and improve upon their fitness in new and exciting ways.”

However, not all students like the new setup and equipment.

Matt Kollegger, a junior majoring in psychology, said that he does not think the placement of the machines is optimal.

“It’s definitely not as good as before,” Kollegger said. “There’s not as much room anymore. And I feel like they got rid of some good machines.”

Harry Brodsky, a senior majoring in accounting, said that the equipment will divide the gym

clientele. “[The equipment] is a nice addition to the gym, but it seems to have brought out two types of people: those who don’t know how to use it and those who are intimidated to use it,” Brodsky said.

According to John Premo, a fitness manager at the East Gym and a second-year graduate student studying business administration, the new system gives more options in FitSpace for students trying to stay or get in shape.

“It is a lot of functional training, great for a lot of body weight exercises and now the amount of exercises that you can do in this facility is almost limitless,” Premo said.

Moore said that there were a number of free demonstrations in the beginning of the semester where trainers taught students how to use the new equipment.

In addition, there will be a fitness class during the spring semester built around the Synrgy360 set.

She said that students with further questions could ask gym staff or schedule a one-on-one session with a personal trainer.

Cindy Cowden, the senior associate director of the East Gym, said that the new equipment was affordable due to the trade-off of old equipment. She said that further changes and machine replacements will continue into next semester.

“This summer we will be

replacing all of the cardio equipment as part of a three year capital replacement plan,” Cowden wrote in an email. “Students returning to FitSpace in August 2015 will find a new variety of cardio machines available including old favorites and some pieces that will be new to the facility.

However, Sam Catalano, a senior double-majoring in marketing and cinema, said that the upgrades do not go far enough.

“It seems like Campus Rec is trying to use bells and whistles to cover up the fact that we need additional gym space,” Catalano said. “It looks cool, but you know what’s cooler? Another gym.”

Fall 2015 academic calendar fails to include pre-finals reading period FALL continued from Page 1 He said the changes are largely a result of how the calendar falls — usually, finals occur the last week before Christmas, Monday to Friday. But in 2015, Christmas falls on a Friday, so the week is cut short. Because the University has to fulfill a certain number of days of classes, Nieman explained that finals week must run late to accommodate them.

“I didn’t want to push back the beginning of the semester, because if we’d done that,

students would’ve been quitting their jobs and getting ready to come here,” Nieman said.

“Cutting a week out of someone’s opportunity to earn money in the summer really affects a lot of students very adversely.”

Despite this, students and faculty alike say they are unhappy with how the end of the semester falls. Ann Merriwether, a psychology professor, said it will put pressure on everybody.

“I think it’s going to create a bit of stress for all of us,” Merriwether said. “It will be a challenge to get

grades completed in a timely fashion, one would suspect it will make exam preparation more challenging.”

Since residence halls close early, resident assistants will be closing buildings until late Dec. 23. Nick Pulakos, a sophomore majoring in history and currently applying to be an RA, said he would be unhappy staying so long.

“I would be extremely annoyed that I would be getting home very late,” Pulakos said.

“The holiday season as a whole

is extremely stressful because not only are you dealing with family but finals are right then, and then I have to worry about getting home late and seeing my family, it’s adding another element of stress that doesn’t necessarily have to be there.”

A senior RA, who asked to be quoted anonymously, said that the new schedule’s lack of time for exam preparation will be detrimental to student success.

“I think it’s a huge disadvantage to all of the students not getting any time in between

the last day of classes and the beginning of final exams,” he wrote in an email. “Usually you get at least the weekend, other schools get entire weeks.”

He also said that ending so close to Christmas would be risky for students remaining till the end of exam week who live far away.

“We have a five or six hour drive home, and you don’t know what the weather is going to be like either, plus it’s holiday season so everybody is going to be on the road that day and

I think its just too close to the holidays for school to be ending,” he said.

Nieman said that he understands that it can be an inconvenience, but that it is largely unavoidable and could be worse for students.

“I think that it will give them less time at home before the holidays, and I think that that probably will be an inconvenience for some,” Nieman said. “But we’re not pushing it so close that people who celebrate Christmas can’t get home for Christmas.”

Slam Poetry club headed to national tournament SLAM continued from Page 1 club at CUPSI, preparation entails more than just memorizing poems. Roman, the president and founder of the club, stressed the importance of conveying the message of the poem to the audience.

“The audience is such a huge part of the slam,” said Roman, a senior majoring in English. “We love it when people let us know that they like something, they think a part is sad or if they think it’s funny. It’s all about being

noisy and participating.”

Though nervous about the scale of the competition, Roman said the opportunity to share their poetry and learn from other performances will be a great experience for the team.

To help the poets develop, members have been attending weekly writing and performance workshops. According to Roman, the CUPSI team wants to work on more group pieces together during the semester.

“We’re all really close already, but it takes a special kind of bond

to be comfortable sharing your personal work with someone, let alone having them make suggestions of how to change it,” Roman said.

Members like Anthony Pereira, a junior majoring in biomedical engineering, are confident that the team will represent Binghamton well in the competition due to its ability to connect with audiences.

“One of our team’s strong points is how varied as individuals they are,” Pereira said. “They’re all capable of giving the audience

all of themselves.”

Editor’s note: Release writer Anna Szilagyi was not involved in editing this story.

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— Daniel Roman Club president

PAGE III Friday, January 30, 2015

Address: University Union WB03 4400 Vestal Parkway E. Binghamton, N.Y. 13902 Phone: 607-777-2515

Pipe Line

Starting Spring Off Right

Spring 2015

LOCAL NEWS

editor-in-ChieF* Rachel Bluth editor@bupipedream.com

NY Senate deputy leader’s son convicted in tax case The son of an influential New York lawmaker has been convicted of three counts of filing false income tax returns and acquitted of four other charges. Matthew Libous, an attorney, was accused of concealing some of his income from a now defunct law firm in Westchester County and from a cell tower company. He was tried

by United States District Judge Vincent Briccetti. Senate Deputy Majority Leader Thomas Libous, a Binghamton Republican, separately faces federal trial, accused of lying to the FBI about arranging his son’s job at the law firm and persuading a lobbying firm to pay part of his salary there. He pleaded not guilty and remains the No. 2 leader of the Republicans’ narrow majority in the state Senate. A felony conviction would cost Libous his seat.

MAnAging editor* Tycho A. McManus manager@bupipedream.com

neWs editor* Nicolás Vega news@bupipedream.com Asst. neWs editors Joseph E. Hawthorne Carla Sinclair Alexandra Mackof oPinion editor* Molly McGrath opinion@bupipedream.com

STATE NEWS Pot arrests plunge in NYC after policy change New York City’s pledge to stop making as many marijuana arrests is playing out on the streets, where arrests and summonses for small-time pot possession have plummeted since the policy change this fall. After a mid-November turn toward violations and summonses instead of misdemeanor arrests for carrying modest amounts of pot, such arrests plunged by 75 percent in December compared to last year, from about 1,820 to 460, according to state Division of Criminal Justice statistics obtained by The Associated Press. The November numbers fell 42 percent, from 2,200 to 1,280. Even summonses have fallen by about 10 percent since the policy change, to 1,180, compared to the same period a year ago, New York Police Department figures show. Critics who decried the once-spiking arrests see the decline as promising. But they say it’s too early to draw lasting conclusions, especially since low-level arrests and summonses of all kinds plummeted for a few weeks after the deadly shootings of two officers Dec. 20. The plunge in arrests caps dramatic shifts in recent years in how the nation’s biggest city polices small amounts of pot. Arrests for the lowestlevel marijuana charge — possession of less than 25 grams, about a sandwich bag full — shot up from about 5,700 in 1995 to 50,700 in 2011, spurring criticism of police tactics and priorities. Then the arrests started declining notably amid public pressure and some police instruction and procedural changes, hitting about 29,000 in 2013.

NATIONAL NEWS Adobe sues Forever 21 for pirating software Adobe filed a lawsuit yesterday in California District Court accusing Forever 21 of pirating over 60 instances of Adobe software. Forever 21 apparently continued to pirate software after being contacted

by Adobe. Adobe is asking the court to compensate the company for lost revenue, court costs and damages. Pirating of the software has been on the rise since Adobe switched to cloud-based versions of the software in 2013.

NATIONAL UNIVERSITY NEWS National leaders tell UVA sororities to avoid frat bid night Sororities at the University of Virginia have been told to stay away from fraternity recruitment events scheduled Saturday.

The sororities are part of the National Panhellenic Conference.

Conference spokeswoman Michelle Bower tells The Washington Post that the mandate came from the sororities’ national presidents.

Bower says the conference supports the decision. U.Va. InterFraternity Council President Ben Gorman tells the newspaper that some sororities were told to avoid any social gathering with fraternity members on Boys’ Bid Night. The university recently lifted a suspension of Greek social activities after fraternities and sororities agreed to stricter regulations. The suspension followed a November Rolling Stone article that detailed an alleged gang rape at a U.Va. fraternity. Much of the article has been discredited.

FAx: 607-777-2600 Web: www.bupipedream.com

releAse editor* Jacob Shamsian release@bupipedream.com Asst. releAse editor Odeya Pinkus Klara Rusinko/Assistant Photo Editor

Late Wednesday evening in the Old University Union, Bearcats for Israel hosted a “Welcome Back Dinner” complete with shawarma, falafel and hummus. The dinner allowed current members to bond and connect with new members, and updated attendees on current events in Israel.

sPorts editor* Ashley Purdy sports@bupipedream.com Asst. sPorts editors Jeff Twitty E.Jay Zarett Fun PAge editor* Ben Moosher fun@bupipedream.com

Police Watch A lighter take on campus crime Aaron Berkowitz | Police Correspondent

Stuck With The Lame RA SATURDAY, JAN. 24, 11:17 p.m. — Officers responded to O’Connor Hall in Dickinson Community due to reports of minors in possession of alcohol, said Investigator Patrick Reilly of Binghamton’s New York State University Police. A resident assistant in the building called officers and brought them to the room.

There were five individuals standing outside of the room; two of the individuals were residents of the room. The RA explained that while she was making rounds earlier, she noticed a pingpong table as well as multiple people in the room. The RA advised the suspects that if they were planning on having a party, she would be back to see them. She came back and heard people playing pingpong, but after knocking, no one answered. She called UPD in order to get help.

The officers were not allowed into the room by the residents, but asked if any of them had alcohol in their room.

They eventually admitted to having it and they poured out their bottles of alcohol while the officers watched in the doorway. The suspects were all referred to the Student Conduct office.

The Writing’s On The Wall MONDAY, JAN. 26, 10:52 p.m. — Officers responded to O’Connor Hall due to reports of vandalism, Reilly said. A 19-year-old female said that an unknown person wrote a word on the whiteboard outside of her room that she deemed inappropriate.

It happened sometime earlier in the night. The victim declined any prosecution toward the unknown suspect. Video was obtained of the hallway, and a person was seen writing on the board. The case was referred to Residential Life.

BUSted TUESDAY, JAN. 27, 11:28 a.m. — Officers responded to the University Union bus stop due to reports of an unruly passenger on a Broome County Transit bus, Reilly said. The bus driver, a 34-year-old female, told the suspect, an 18-year-old male, that the bus was over capacity so he went into the back entrance of the bus. The driver noticed and told the suspect to exit the bus since the bus was full.

The suspect refused to leave and multiple passengers were telling the bus driver to just drive the bus, so she called UPD for assistance.

The officers told the suspect that since the bus was over capacity, it was dangerous to stay on the bus. The suspect was angry and refused to leave the bus. The officers told the suspect that either he could leave the bus willingly, or risk being taken off and arrested for disorderly conduct. The suspect eventually left the bus, which then drove away.

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Corey Futterman John Linitz Photo editor* Franz Lino photo@bupipedream.com Asst. Photo editor Klara Rusinko editoriAl Artists Miriam Geiger Paige Gittelman CoPy desk ChieF* Emily Howard copy@bupipedream.com Asst. CoPy desk ChieF Paul Palumbo leAd Web develoPer* William Sanders developer@bupipedream.com neWsrooM teChnology* William Sanders tech@bupipedream.com

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Pipe Dream is published by the Pipe Dream Executive Board, which has sole and final discretion over the newspaper’s content and personnel. *Positions seated on the Executive Board are denoted by an asterisk.

Corrections A Jan. 26 article incorrectly stated that professor David Merriwether worked on his dissertation in Chile and Peru when in fact he worked on his collections in Chile and Peru.

Additionally, it was his grandparents and not him that said that “Nyala” was a Native American term for old broken down barn.

stabilizing: will's just wrath

Pipe Dream is published Tuesdays and Fridays while classes are in session during the fall and spring semesters, except during finals weeks and vacations.

“We can no longer allow this college to be held back by the few who wrongly hide harmful behaviors behind the illusion of youthful exuberance.”

— Dartmouth College President Philip J. Hanlon, after announcing that the college will ban all beverages with an alcohol content over 15 percent

This Day in History January 30, 1835 In the first assassination attempt against a president of the United States, Richard Lawrence attempts to shoot President Andrew Jackson, but fails and is subdued by a crowd, including several congressmen.

Pipe Dream accepts stimulating, original guest columns from undergraduate students, graduate students and faculty. Submissions should be 400 to 500 words in length and be thus far unpublished.

Submissions must include the writer’s name and phone number, and year of graduation or expected year of graduation. Graduate students and faculty members should indicate their standing as such, as well as departmmental affiliation.

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marinara:destabilizing

RELEASE Arts & Culture

How to break up with your professor

...during the add/drop period. You know this relationship is going nowhere, anyway.

You might feel awkward, but remember, you are but a faceless cog in the wheel of a class

Odeya Pinkus | Assistant Release Editor It is here! Yes, lovebirds of Binghamton, ‘tis the season to be fawning over your significant other, or crying over a bowl of ice cream with your significant roommate. Valentine’s is here, and love is in the air. Yet with all of the candy hearts and Hallmark cards, it’s possible that we forget about another day in February, one with room for much more heartbreak: Feb. 6, the add/drop deadline. It’s time to decide who you will be. A lover? A heartbreaker? A committed pupil? A really shitty student? Will you drop that nightmare-ish macro class? Or will you suffer through because you are too embarrassed to pull yourself from the roster? Don’t be that person this year, sending your teacher to sob while their family and friends tell them that they’re “better off” and that “there are plenty of students in the ocean.” No, this year, Release will guide you through the mess, with a few simple options to

break up with your professor with tact and grace.

The Irish goodbye — This one is a classic and, while risky, can be very effective if used correctly. Channel your weekend self, and think back to the times when you were tired and drunk and did not want to start hugging your frenemies goodbye in the Venue backroom. So like a shadow in the moonlight, you slipped away with poise and finesse. If your class is a large lecture, it’s possible to do the same.

Sure, you might feel awkward, but remember, you are but a faceless cog in the wheel of a class, and your teacher probably has tenure and won’t notice or care.

The heartfelt card — If you’re in a class of 50 or less, consider softening the blow with a present of sorts.

Remember to go simple, whether it be a nice card, a box of chocolates or a small puppy with a bow on its collar.

Any of those are equally acceptable.

Imagine your teacher’s face when he or she unknowingly receives a small

dog at the beginning of class! They will be so overjoyed with their new family member that they will have no room for loathing in their hearts.

Put on an exciting performance — For those who still don’t know what business they’d like to go into, remember that there is no business like show business, so why not get started? Prepare and rehearse a small monologue and/or dance number in order to bid your professor adieu. They will be so moved by your performance that anger will not be an option. For those who need speech inspiration, try classics such as “to be or not to be” from “Hamlet,” or the end of “Mean Girls” when Cady starts breaking the prom queen crown.

Surprise them with a musical visit from John Stamos — Whatever happened to predictability? Am I right, guys? Bring your soon to be exprofessor to tears with nostalgia as they relive the best “Full House” moments right in their classroom. Contact John Stamos at his most recent Oikos yogurt

commercial shoot and ask to borrow him for the weekend. Once he gets to Binghamton, give him the grand tour, and treat him to Red Mango while you’re at it (it’s only fair, he came all the way here). Once you’re done, drag him to your class and have him play all of Uncle Jesse’s greatest hits. Nobody will remark “How rude!” if you drop the class after that.

Help your teacher find love — Take another hint from the ’90s and channel Cher’s matchmaking skills from “Clueless.” Regardless of whether they are married or not, they definitely want to be set up on a date with one of your parents. This is the perfect plan because while your professor might never forgive you, your new parent will!

How could they be upset when their newly adopted child drops their class?

They know it’s only because all of the other students will fear nepotism and corruption in the class system.

4 students on the study abroad experience

Whether for the classes or for the food, at least it's not Binghamton Jami Ganz | Staff Writer While the majority of students are beginning to acclimate once more to Binghamton’s perpetual cold, others are using this spring semester to explore other countries. From England to New Zealand and everywhere in between, jetsetters from Binghamton University are starting to make their mark on the world at large. If you’re interested in any of these programs yourself, here’s how it’s going so far for some of them.

Brittany Frank, a junior doublemajoring in English and philosophy, politics and law, is participating in the English department’s Semester-in-London program. Sianna Simon, a junior majoring in economics, is studying in the Lorenzo de’ Medici Institute in Florence, Italy.

Emily D’Emic is a junior majoring in English at Binghamton University who is participating in SUNY New Paltz’s program in Besancon, France. And Elyse Belarge, a junior majoring in environmental studies, is studying in Dunedin, New Zealand through a program at SUNY Oswego.

1. What made you choose to study there?

“The reason I chose London was because of how well it fit with my English major and because of how much in line it was with my academic interests.” —Frank “Not many people speak English here and I want to learn French.” —D’Emic “I went to Italy for a two week exchange program in high school and have wanted to return ever since. I threw a coin in the Trevi fountain so I knew I must return!” — Simon “I’ve never traveled outside of Europe, so I thought this would be a good time to experience a different country. I’m an environmental studies major, so I also thought that this would be a good way to get a different perspective on topics that have to do with my major.” —Belarge

—Simon “I’m excited to travel around New Zealand because it’s supposed to be an extremely beautiful and scenic country.

I’m also excited to meet other people from around the world who are interested in the same things as I am.” —Belarge

3. What are the top five places or things you want to go to or do while you’re abroad?

“Paris, France; Lisbon, Portugal; Dublin, Ireland; Rome, Italy; and Barcelona, Spain.”

—Frank “I need to go to Amsterdam! Other than that, just to travel Europe would be great, see Nice, maybe Spain or Italy.” —D’Emic “Eat. Travel. Make best friends. Learn the language. Continue to learn and appreciate other cultures.” —Simon “I would like to attend an All Blacks 2. What are you dreading the game. That’s the NZ national rugby most? What are you most excited for? team. I want to visit Hobbiton, try a few “I am dreading being gone for so long, adventure sports, do a lot of hiking and and missing out on all the fun my friends learn about Maori culture.” —Belarge back at Binghamton will be having. I am most looking forward to traveling to other 4. Any preconceived notions you places in Europe and experiencing another have about your host country? culture’s way of life.” —Frank “They are all very polite and proper.” — “Most excited for the food. Kind of Frank dreading traveling alone for the first time “Maybe that the food is better here? and missing a flight through the chaos.” Which I’m not sure of yet since I haven’t been out to eat. The butter is definitely better though.” —D’Emic “Only the good stereotypes — like I’m going to be eating the best food of my life.” — Simon

5. Any foods or dress you’re looking forward to trying?

“I definitely want to try snails.”

—D’Emic “All foods from tripe — pig intestines and definitely trying to score a genuine dirndl from a visit to Germany’s Spring Fest.” —Simon 6. Anything you’ll miss from Binghamton?

“Definitely the people. My friends.”

—D’Emic “I’ll miss the people in Binghamton as playing club soccer, but I’m excited to meet new people abroad and see how they treat soccer.” —Belarge 7. What classes are you taking abroad?

“Shakespeare, The British Experience, Is Racism ‘Over’ in London, and Art and Architecture.” —Frank “Italian Cuisine, Workplace Psychology, Screenwriting, Advanced Italian, Sociology of Consumerism and a global studies class online through Bing.” —Simon “The Environmental History of New Zealand, Resource Evaluation and Planning and A Special Topics in Human Geography class.” —Belarge 8. What is one piece of advice you’ve received that you think will prove valuable for this experience?

“I’ve been told numerous times that things are more expensive in London than in America so I should spend my money wisely and familiarize myself with the rate of exchange.” —Frank “Don’t be afraid to make mistakes, if someone is impatient with you it’s on them, not you.” —D’Emic “Be aware of your surroundings and don’t be gullible. Don’t travel alone, travel alone.” —Simon

Photo Provided

5

RELEASE

January 30, 2015 | www.bupipedream.com

Blackberry Classic is more like an antique The brand's throwback attempt won't save it from going under Rich Kersting | Release It’s been a long time since anybody has taken BlackBerry phones seriously. The company’s product line, once innovative and groundbreaking, has become little more than a collection of antiquated technology.

Their stock has collapsed and the company has been scrambling to find its base again.

BlackBerry’s keyboard is no longer the saving grace it used to be, even if Kim Kardashian and Barack Obama still haven’t relinquished theirs. There’s something about BlackBerry, particularly ownership of a BlackBerry, that means something to people. But BlackBerry cannot survive on sentiment alone; what the company needs is to develop a great phone. This it has tried, and failed, to do with the BlackBerry Classic.

From the looks of it, the BlackBerry Classic is a phone inspired by nostalgia.

With the return to the classic design of BlackBerry’s glory days, it looks like the phone you used to want. The physical keyboard is as beautiful and refreshing as ever, and you feel as though just by holding it you could receive an email from Mark Cuban about investing millions into your startup. It’s got the look, and the feel, of the most powerful phone in existence.

But for all of its positive points, the Classic is simply marred with flaws that make it impractical for everyday use.

In development, BlackBerry chose to lock down on the characteristics of their phones that make them most appealing to businesses: the keyboard, email and some of the best security on the market. They do this, and they do it well, but the feeling is much more like iteration rather than innovation. The Classic is an old dog with the same old tricks and, while the company

would like to make old seem new again, it just doesn’t have the power to keep up with other phones on the market. It’s a shame too, since the Classic boasts an impressive 22 hours of battery life.

BlackBerry has long survived on the idea that people need two phones: one for work and one for home. However, as competing phones from both the Apple and Android camps get more secure, businesses, especially younger ones, are forgoing that “need” for a second phone.

With the aging business elite nearing ever closer to retirement, BlackBerry needs to create a phone that combines the demands of public and private life. They’ve waded in these waters with the Classic’s compatibility of Android apps (perhaps the best idea they’ve ever had), but with the phone’s antiquated chipset, its processors just aren’t up to the challenge of running these apps at acceptable speeds. It doesn’t matter how addicted you are, nobody is waiting more than five seconds to play Candy Crush.

The Classic was an honest attempt at a comeback that missed the mark. For those still hacking away at the keyboard of their old BlackBerry Bold, the Classic will serve as a sufficient upgrade. But for those used to the speeds and cultural relevance of iOS and Android, there is little in the Classic other than novelty. Perhaps it’s the phone you’ve always wanted, but it’s just not the phone that you need right now. Amongst rumors of Samsung’s possible acquisition of BlackBerry, it’s starting to seem that maybe selling the company is BlackBerry’s only viable option if it is to survive in today’s fast-paced market. The obvious benefits of a SamBerry revolve around the iconic BlackBerry platform running a native Android environment. The possibilities, from there, seem endless.

Photos Provided by the Associated Press

She ain't afraid of no ghost Our new ghostbusters are here, and they're all women Rich Kersting | Release For the last 25 years, fans of the popular “Ghostbusters” franchise have awaited a third movie. When rumors and whispers of screenplays by Dan Aykroyd began surfacing a few years ago, the dreams of millions of fans were becoming a reality. The original director, Ivan Reitman, as well as many of the original cast members, including Aykroyd and Sigourney Weaver, were slated to return.

However, when Bill Murray decided to pass on the sequel, the movie began hitting bumps, which soon slowed it down to cancellation. Coupled with the death of Harold Ramis, who co-wrote and co-starred in the first two movies, fans’ hopes of a third “Ghostbusters” movie seemed little more than a pipe dream. But in the ashes of one project emerged a new, bolder phoenix that has people talking.

With endorsements from both Aykroyd and Murray, both stars of the original films, the cast list has been confirmed to include some of comedy’s favorite ladies: Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Leslie Jones and Kate McKinnon. All of these women, with the exception of McCarthy, have been cast members of

“Saturday Night Live.” The first question on everyone’s mind concerns how these characters will fit into the greater canon.

Will these ladies attempt to fit the tropes of the original “Ghostbusters,” or will they be completely new characters with fresh personalities? The latter seems most likely, as the film has a different writer and director than the first two movies.

Despite her speculated involvement in the canceled “Ghostbusters” movie, it hasn’t been mentioned whether or not Weaver will make an appearance in the reboot. A shame, since Weaver wielding a proton pack would probably validate scores of fan fiction.

While many “Ghostbusters” purists might be taken aback by the bastardization of their favorite boy’s club, this new movie offers an exciting opportunity to take “Ghostbusters” to places it’s never gone before. That is to say, don’t think of it as a “girl’s ‘Ghostbusters,’” but rather one that looks to be accessible to demographics not yet targeted by the franchise.

Initial disappointment is understandable, as stalwart fans of the franchise have been expecting the return of their beloved and familiar original cast, but this reboot might serve as the resurrection of a franchise that’s long

existed in phantom form. Besides, if the traditionalists want the third movie they were expecting they should just play the 2009 video game, in which the main cast serves as voice actors. The new “Ghostbusters” movie isn’t attempting to be “Ghostbusters 3,” but rather a new start. The mission isn’t to change the original narrative, but instead build a fresh new one in the “Ghostbusters” world.

The risk of turning a franchise on its head could result in a lot more than just a bad movie. Since its inception, the image of “Ghostbusters” has never been this challenged, and the success or failure of this movie could very well mean the life or death of this franchise. What’s required isn’t a simple cut-and-paste job with the original characters, changing the “he’s” to “she’s” and reimagining some of the jokes. This movie requires brand new characters, brand new tropes and hopefully a storyline that’s original and entertaining. This movie needs innovation, not iteration, and its ability to accomplish this will determine whether “Ghostbusters” lives to see another day or returns to the grave.

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6

RELEASE

www.bupipedream.com | January 30, 2015

Binghamton is great, but Hogwarts is better When you feel like moving to another campus, immerse yourself in one of these novels somehow blame it on you. The campus, therefore, is the perfect place to set a novel, because it’s a made-up setting that could It’s easy to forget that a school campus also exist in real life, and because campuses is an artificial setting, designed so that are often filled with rich characters who students can learn and hang out together, come from wildly different backgrounds and so that professors can teach and not and each have their own set of experiences. show up at their office hours and then Here are some of the best examples of campus novels.

“Lucky Jim” by Kingsley Amis — Jim Dixon doesn’t want to be a lecturer in medieval studies, but he kind of fell into it.

He’d rather be in the real world, chasing girls and living a glorious metropolitan life in London. Uneasy with the pseudointellectual posturing of other professors in his department, Dixon struggles to keep a good relationship with everyone else. Despite his academic incompetence, he tries to publish scholarly work before his job’s probationary period ends. Amis based the book’s unnamed campus on Oxford, where he went, and skewers the departmental pettiness and cloistered culture he observed. One professor is even based on J.R.R. Tolkien, who was Amis’ least-favorite professor at Oxford.

“The Secret History” by Donna Tartt — As with Hogwarts, the campus of “The Goldfinch” author’s first novel is a Jacob Shamsian | Release Editor

place for students to reinvent themselves and avoid eccentric professors in hallways.

Richard Papen, from a small town in California, heads to Hampden College, a small Vermont school based on Bennington College, where Tartt went. Papen gets into an elite group of classics majors who, as we’re told at the beginning of the book, will kill one of their group. The novel tracks how that happens, as well as what happens to the group after the murder. Amidst the mystery at the novel’s center, some of the best scenes are just of the characters hanging out, drinking, making mistakes and generally just not spending much time in class. It’s a great novel to lose yourself in.

“Pnin” by Vladimir Nabokov — Nabokov himself was a professor at Wellesley and Cornell, where he was known to ask students to watch movies for him and find out if they’re good enough to watch with his wife. His novel is about an absentminded Russian professor named “Vladimir Vladimirovich N—” at “Waindell” College. The story turns out to be both a comedy of manners, set in the weird world of college rather than Victorian tea rooms, as well as a culture-clash comedy about the weird differences between America and Russia.

“Stoner” by John Williams — On lists of “the best book you’ve never heard of,” “Stoner” often ranks near the top. Every few years, it dips into obscurity only to be rescued by a reissue that brings critical acclaim. It’s about William Stoner, who, sent to school to study agriculture, instead gets drawn into studying English after he falls in love with Shakespeare’s Sonnet 73, and then later becomes an English professor. As a professor, he’s completely undistinguished, producing no extraordinary scholarship and struggling through a difficult marriage. It’s one of the most compelling things you’ll ever read. Williams is a master at getting into the inner psychology of his characters and making them fascinating.

“This Side of Paradise” by F. Scott Fitzgerald — Fitzgerald’s first novel was so successful that, after publishing it, he was able to convince Zelda Sayre to take him back, and then marry him. It’s about a student who dabbles with literature and women at Princeton before serving in World War I, solidifying his weariness about the world. Unlike Zelda Fitzgerald, Princeton University’s president wasn’t a fan of the novel, saying its characters spend “their lives wholly in a spirit of calculation and snobbishness.”

“The Magicians” by Lev Grossman — Right after leaving an interview he was supposed to have for Princeton, Quentin Coldwater is whisked away to interview for Brakebills, a gleeful riff on Hogwarts and sort of American wizarding college.

Learning how to perform magic, it turns out, is actually pretty boring, involving a lot of dense theory and long hours of practice.

In everything else, Quentin and his friends learn that, with magic, they’re pretty much playing the world on “easy” mode, so they spend their time indulging in life’s more hedonistic pleasures, eventually becoming drug addicts. Things get weird when they discover a portal to another, Narnia-like world, eventually sending them on a path to find fulfillment.

The “Harry Potter” series by J.K. Rowling — After Harry, Ron and Hermione, the fourth character of the Harry Potter novels is Hogwarts itself. Hogwarts is everyone’s form, where the characters can leave their parents and learn to grow up on their own, fawn over professors who’ve won Witch Weekly’s Most Charming Smile Award five times, and run into the occasional unicorn. As in college, some of the most important learning happens outside of the classroom.

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Louis C.K. watches rats bang ...and you want to hear him tell the story about it Odeya Pinkus | Assistant Release Editor “I don’t understand how he does it,” was just one of the thoughts that passed through my mind as I watched Louis C.K’s brand new special, “Live At The Comedy Store.” Covering everything from his native Boston accent to the sexual habits of rats, Louis C.K. manages to highlight everyday occurrences and unmask their shitty, yet simultaneously hysterical roots.

The hour-long show was released on his website for $5, following the cancellation of his fourth Madison Square Garden show in light of the recent “historic”-ish storm.

It began with a snippet of the opener, Jay London. While at first I was a bit confused, I did find some of his jokes funny eventually.

And while I found that choice of an opener

to be odd, C.K.’s rationale made sense. In an email to his fans, he described his choice to film in a comedy club, and how such places are the birthplace of stand-up comedy. On his website, he described London as one of his “favorite club comics going way back to the late 80s.”

Then he walks onto the stage, and it’s an entirely different ball game. His command of the stage makes something so difficult look so effortless. Perhaps it’s his decades of experience, or perhaps it’s just natural talent, but he manages to make magic out of the most mundane. And while in this special we hear brand new jokes, it’s still coming out of the same crass, sarcastic, self-deprecating mouth — in the best way, of course.

Once again, Louis C.K. brings humanity to a world that needs it, whether it’s found

in his musings of stress and death or parenthood and everyday life. He allows us to laugh at him and at ourselves.

Underneath each joke lies a nugget of truth, and it’s pretty easy to find them if you’re listening. Bottom line: It’s worth the watch.

I didn’t find every second funny, but it’s worthwhile alone for the really funny bits that had me awkwardly laughing in public.

If nothing else, watch it for his use of the phrase “blizzard of bad dicks.”

As Jerry Seinfeld once said “There is no such thing as fun for the whole family,” and this applies here. Don’t watch it with your mom (unless your mom is really chill), as it’s pretty NSFW. Watch it by yourself, or watch it with your friends with whom you are comfortable enough to listen to the words “rat orgasm.”

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7

FUN

January 30, 2015 | www.bupipedream.com

Our Aemittephagus Future

Fun.

American Diaper

Seth Wegener

Emma 'n' Ben

RELEASE DATE– Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Los Angeles Times Daily Crossword Puzzle Edited by Rich Norris and Joyce Nichols Lewis

ACROSS 1 Overactors 5 In pieces 10 Forget about 14 Object of worship 15 Ladies’ man 16 Costa __ 17 Centennial State rock?

20 Pilot’s announcement, briefly 21 Frontier bases 22 Wolverine State fire starter?

26 It’ll never fly 27 Bud’s buddy 28 Wetland 29 One in a “Flying” circus act 32 __ generis: unique 35 Peach State wide open spaces?

39 Sixth sense 40 Baggage claim item 42 Firm way to stand 45 Guy 46 Without precedent 47 Cotton State sculpture?

51 Italian veal dish 53 Pah preceder 54 Cornhusker State Town Car? 59 Quaint “Holy moly!”

60 John of England 61 Bay of Pigs locale 62 Disney dog 63 Catches one’s breath 64 To be, in old Rome

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DOWN 1 Juice drink with a hyphenated name 2 Big fuss 3 Minute particles 4 One of the deadly sins 5 Coach Parseghian 6 Pea’s place

49 Watery trenches 38 When many go 7 O’Neill’s “__ for under to lunch the Misbegotten” drawbridges 41 Dolly, the clone, 8 Blunt rejection 50 Italian lawn game was one 9 Play the piccolo 51 Like Ogden 42 Derivatives of it 10 Synthetic fabric Nash’s lama, in a are used in 11 “A living faith will poem sunscreen last in the __ of 52 Big name in 43 Privilege loser, the blackest video games often storm”: Gandhi 55 Place to park 44 Bring down on 12 “Rhyme Pays” 56 Connections the gridiron rapper 57 Barbell abbr.

47 Equally yucky 13 Old salts 58 Rob Roy’s refusal 18 Bitter complainer 48 “Mercy me!”

19 Words before ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE: smoke or flames 22 Copy cats?

23 Reflection 24 Bell hit with a padded hammer 25 Auto with a four-ring logo 30 Cut off, as branches 31 Remote batteries 32 [error left as is] 33 Like a 12-0 verdict 34 Basketball Hall of Famer Dan 36 Mountain lion 37 Neeson of “Taken” 03/24/09 xwordeditor@aol.com

By Dan Naddor (c)2009 Tribune Media Services, Inc.

What: Super Bowl Menu Specials When: Sunday, February 1st Where: Moghul in the MarketPlace @ 6pm &

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03/24/09

OPINION Friday, January 30, 2015

Don’t read, just weep

Consolidate services to lower property taxes Molly McGrath Opinion Editor

B

inghamton University is on a mission to be one of America’s premier public universities.

The University is bringing classrooms to the 21st century, building state-of-the-art facilities and has invested millions of dollars into the student gym. University President Harvey Stenger and BU’s administration are seemingly prepared to throw everything but the kitchen sink into the efforts to make Binghamton a household name. But while students have been given a lot, there is one thing that has been mysteriously taken away: a reading period before finals.

The fall 2015 semester schedule has left some of us puzzled. Classes ends on Tuesday, Dec. 15 and finals begin on Wednesday, Dec. 16. Yes, you read that right. There isn’t even a weekend between your last class and your first final.

This is a bad move, and not just for the slackers who rely on the two-day weekend before finals to cram. During orientation, the importance of time management is stressed for incoming students. Time management is not the ability to perform on zero night’s

sleep because your university decided finals begin on a Wednesday morning and your classes end on Tuesday night.

Even the most diligent students require at least 24 hours to mentally prepare for finals.

Most students spend the entire semester preparing for their final examinations, projects and papers. Usually, we at least have the weekend. Two days to review this massive amount of information wanes in comparison to UC Berkeley’s two-week period, but at least it’s common courtesy.

The elimination of the reading period isn’t only unfair, it’s unnecessary. The fall 2015 semester is two days longer than the fall 2014 semester (67 days in 2014 and 69 days in 2015). Attentive readers may be thinking, “Wait a minute! Didn’t we have an extra Monday and Tuesday on the fall 2015 calendar, right before finals start on Wednesday?” By our calculations, that’s correct. Without any explanation for the slightly extended semester from the University, we can suggest an easy

fix to this pesky problem. If classes ended on Friday, Dec. 11 rather than on Tuesday, Dec. 15, finals could begin on Monday, Dec. 21, and students would still attend the same number of class days as they did in the fall 2014 semester. Such a simple change could save students stress and anxiety.

It isn’t practical to schedule two class days immediately before finals week. Students skip class because it’s sunny outside. Most students will skip classes if important assignments are due in less than 24 hours. Those special few who attend class probably won’t be focused enough to absorb information.

Fall 2015 finals week is a little more than 10 months away. Ten months is ample time for the administration to make a simple adjustment to its schedule so that students and faculty plan accordingly. If not, 10 months is enough time for the administration to explain its rationale for eliminating our reading period.

Views expressed in the opinion pages represent the opinions of the columnists. The only piece which represents the views of the Pipe Dream Editorial Board is the Staff Editorial, above. The Editorial Board is composed of the Editor-in-Chief, News Editor, Opinion Editor, Sports Editor, and Release Editor.

To the average student, Binghamton seems like a cheap place to live. Nightly drink specials, $5 movie tickets and discounted groceries make college life fun and affordable.

For this reason, it may come as a surprise that Binghamton residents pay the highest property tax rate in New York state. Not Manhattan, not White Plains. Over the past 12 years, the city’s property tax rate has doubled. If Binghamton is to avoid bankruptcy, the city government must consolidate services with Broome County.

City-county consolidation is a drastic measure, but a necessary step to avoid the cycle of a dwindling taxable population and rising property tax rates. As unemployment rates rise, the city loses revenue and raises taxes, causing even more residents to leave. It is no coincidence that Binghamton’s unemployment rate is the second highest in the state.

Increased budget cuts will not solve the problem. Certain fixed costs, like funding for the fire and police departments, cannot be cut.

The city government is caught between a rock and hard place. Essential services cannot be eliminated and rising property taxes dampen out any hope for economic stability. When trapped in such a position, unpopular decisions need to be made.

Consolidation of services increases efficiency and reduces costs. Duplicate services can be merged and administered by a centralized body. In turn, a more centralized administrative

government creates an economy of scale, allowing more savings and bargaining power. Given Binghamton’s shrinking population, the city is an ideal candidate for consolidation of services.

Though Binghamton may benefit, city-county consolidation is far from a perfect solution. Opponents argue that consolidation increases corruption and takes away voters’ ability to hold officials accountable.

Consolidation also carries the risk that budget allocations will not reflect the preferences of local communities. In some cases, comprehensive citycounty consolidation resulted in an overall rise in expenses.

While consolidation has its drawbacks, it can be executed in a gradual, politically adept manner.

Binghamton and Broome County officials can collaborate and identify the areas best suited for consolidation. Last Thursday, Chemung County Executive Tom Santulli announced the consolidation of Elmira’s public works department, resulting in an estimated $1.8 million in savings. This success demonstrates that coordination is both possible and cost-efficient for upstate communities.

Consolidation alone will not reverse Binghamton’s financial ruin, but city officials must act now. Property taxes are expected to rise again this year.

The longer city officials wait to institute change, the more people are forced to leave the place they call home.

— Molly McGrath is a senior majoring in political science and history

Je Suis Charlie aftermath teaches lessons about free speech Kyle Welch Contributing Columnist

In light of the reprehensible attacks against the staff of Charlie Hebdo and the four Jewish customers in a Parisian supermarket earlier this month, many contentious ethical questions have re-entered public debate.

Of the many issues that have resurfaced, the principle of free speech is one of the most vexing and convoluted. The contrasting

political philosophies of France and the United States regarding free speech highlight the balancing act between individual expression and equality and how offsetting this balance can harm a democracy.

Here in the U.S., due to our revolutionary history, the prevailing philosophy has valued individual liberty and limiting government interference in our lives. Because of that, the Supreme Court has tended to protect racist speech, suppressing local ordinances to stifle it, as in the case of R.A.V. v. City of St. Paul.

France’s policy couldn’t be more different. With the passing of the Pleven Law of 1972, which banned

the instigation of racial hatred and racially pejorative speech, and the Gayssot Law of 1990, which punished those who publicly denied the Holocaust, the French government has taken steps to punish racists.

Recently, a French “comedian” named Dieudonné, whose stage name means “Godgiven,” was charged under the Pleven Law. Known for his anti-Semitic performances, he tweeted after the attack that he “feels Charlie Coulibaly,” combining the name Charlie Hebdo with one of the attackers’ names, Amedy Coulibaly.

Although Dieudonné’s jokes

are vile and don’t register as funny, his jokes don’t bother me as much as the fact that many people enthusiastically attend his shows. Through the patronage of Dieudonné’s audience, his odious beliefs are legitimatized, giving him a platform on which he can spread hate.

Many have pointed out that France’s policy seems hypocritical, targeting Dieudonné while allowing Charlie Hebdo to publish an image of the prophet Muhammed.

While Dieudonné’s content hardly qualifies him as a martyr for free speech, the French government has established a paradigm by

prosecuting those who target individuals while allowing those who target institutions to escape prosecution.

Just because France has created this standard doesn’t mean it’s justifiable. Even though arguing that satire should have no bounds sounds fair, it’s far from moral in a society where many lack a voice.

Satire should mock the ruling class and those who have power, not kick already marginalized people in the teeth. Keep in mind that more than 50 Islamophobic attacks have taken place since the attack on Charlie Hebdo’s headquarters.

In the end, striking a balance

between protecting the rights of all citizens and not stifling dissent is complicated, but not impossible.

Hate speech and discrimination prevent all members of society from having equal opportunities. Hate speech does not express dissent against the government — which is one of the central purposes of free speech — but instead targets the society’s most vulnerable populations, which deserve protection.

— Kyle Welch is a sophomore majoring in French Language and Lingustics and Arabic Language and Literature

Wealthy donors drown out voices of democratic majority Lawrence Ciulla Contributing Columnist

Earlier this week at the close of a conservative retreat, the Koch brothers, Charles and David, famous for their wealthy namesake company, announced a spending goal of $889 million for the 2016 presidential campaign season. In a post-Citizens United world, this duo, alongside their network of 300 donors, are seeking to use their voice to sway an election and drown out the voices of the American people.

After the Citizens United ruling, the Supreme Court ruled that political action committees (PACs) are able to raise and donate unlimited amounts of money in support of a candidate. Rich individuals, such as the Koch brothers or Sheldon Adelson, have invested hundreds of millions of dollars propping up candidates that follow their individual vision for the country. Their ability to influence elections with little restriction has resulted in an oligarchy, a ruling system in which a small privileged group controls politics.

It is wrong for a democratic nation to allow its political future controlled by a limited few. The lofty goal set by the Koch brothers puts

them in a position to out-fundraise the major political parties, both of which raised a little over $500 million each in the last presidential cycle.

Super PACs should be subject to the same regulatory laws as party donations. Individuals can only donate a limited amount to parties over the course of primary and general elections. Donations come from supporters and citizens who believe in the issues and donate in the hope that parties will advocate on their behalf. This is perfectly democratic. Unregulated donations are not.

With their billions of dollars in personal wealth, the voice of Koch is louder than the voice of an everyday

citizen. This scenario strays far from the “all men are created equal” ideal fought for in the American revolution against a tyrannical leader.

Today’s tyrants rule through the money in their pockets. The Koch brothers retreat was a tryout among potential presidential candidates in which donors decided whom they wanted to support and guide through the 2016 election. The competition occurred behind closed doors, financed by the money that will shape this coming election.

In 2012, Adelson, a Las Vegas casino owner, bankrolled Newt Gingrich, an unpopular candidate, with over $100 million in order to make him president of the United

States. Adelson, much like many of these wealthy donors, sought to install his preferred candidate through a check, not a ballot box.

While elections and races are expensive — growing more so with each election — they need be run on the backs and hopes of the American people. The abuse of the political system by the Koch brothers and many like them is nothing new, but never has the system revolved so much around the political will of a wealthy few.

— Lawrence Ciulla is a junior majoring in philosophy, politics and law

The lofty goal set by the Koch brothers put them in a position to out-fundraise the major political parties

9

SPORTS

January 30, 2015 | www.bupipedream.com

PIPE DREAM STAFF SUPER BOWL XLIX PICKS RACHEL BLUTH EDITOR IN CHIEF

DESIGN MANAGER

PHOTO EDITOR

27-17 Fuck Tom Brady. Go Jets.

EMMA SIEGEL

FRANZ LINO 42-13 Simply put, Tom Brady is a deity in New England.

COREY FUTTERMAN DESIGN ASSISTANT

MOLLY McGRATH OPINION EDITOR

34-24 Brady and Belichick are too smart for any team to handle at this point. The Patriots take the game in the fourth.

JOSEPH HAWTHORNE ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR

36-10

The Seahawks won last year, but the Patriots are really good at playing, so they might win instead.

EMILY HOWARD COPY DESK CHIEF

24-17 All I know about football recently is some supposedly deflated balls, plus my roommate is a Patriots fan.

JOHN LINITZ

DESIGN ASSISTANT

27-24 Although the Seahawks pulled off a miracle victory against the Packers, Wilson and Lynch will come out strong against the Pats.

I know nothing about football so I looked it up on Yahoo Answers.

JACOB SHAMSIAN RELEASE EDITOR

38-28 The Seahawks have mastered both air and sea. Patriots, no matter their strengths, are at the yoke of gravity.

Tom Brady is Satan, evil always prevails.

TYCHO McMANUS MANAGING EDITOR

30-28

24-20

1153-30

JEFF TWITTY

ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR

34-30 Look for a West Coast look from the Hawks and for Lynch to hit the middle hard. Boring, but effective.

Pats seem to have it together.

ASHLEY PURDY SPORTS EDITOR

38-35 Russell Wilson is incredibly athletic and his team knows how to rally back for a win. It won’t be pretty, but they’ll do it.

WILL SANDERS

TECHNOLOGY MANAGER

NICK VEGA NEWS EDITOR

24-17 Last I checked, the Seahawks don’t have Eli Manning, the only man to beat Brady in the Super Bowl — twice.

E.JAY ZARETT

ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR

24-20

16-13 First result in Google for “super bowl predictions.”

Brady is the best player on the field and Belichick is one of the top coaches to ever live.

Photos Provided by AP Exchange & NFL, Designed by Corey Futterman/Design Assistant

10

SPORTS

January 30, 2015 | www.bupipedream.com

BU falters, 71-55, against UMBC as losing skid hits five Albrecht's 19-point performance insufficient for Bearcats to overcome Retrievers Brett Malamud Pipe Dream Sports

While the Binghamton women’s basketball team stretched its losing streak to five games against UMBC on Wednesday, there was a glimmer of hope late in the first half. The Bearcats (4-17, 2-6 AE) rallied on a 21-6 run late in the first to cut a 16-point deficit to one heading into halftime. However, BU never took a lead in the contest, and ultimately fell to the Retrievers (714, 2-6 AE), 71-55.

“I thought we exerted a lot of energy,” Binghamton head coach Linda Cimino said. “Playing [from] behind and playing catch-up takes a lot out of you.”

During the run, the Bearcats showed a glimpse of their prowess from beyond the arc. Three different players contributed to BU’s 3-point total in that timespan. Junior guard Kim Albrecht knocked down three of her own to cut UMBC’s lead, while senior guard Gintare Surdokaite and freshman guard Jasmine Sina drained one apiece.

“Our intensity level picked up tremendously,” Sina said about the first-half run. “We came out, I think, a little slow, but once we started hitting our shots, we really helped each other up.”

Albrecht went on to finish the game with a team-high 19 points, including going 8 for 12 shots

from the field, while Sina finished the game with 13 points and eight rebounds.

“Coach reminds me that I have the green light and that has been very helpful for me,” Albrecht said.

“Coming up as an upperclassmen now helps too with the experience and stuff like that. I would say … I’m a little bit more confident this year. I’ve just got to keep shooting.”

Surdokaite added a career-high 12 points and six rebounds coming off the bench. Overall, the Bearcats drained eight shots from behind the perimeter for the game.

“Whenever our guards are open, we just have to be ready to catch and shoot,” Albrecht said.

“All of us are pretty confident in our shots. When you’re open, you just have to take them.”

But despite impressive individual performances, BU hampered its chance for victory by committing 22 turnovers, good for 18 UMBC points. The Retrievers employed a full-court press for almost the entirety of the game, making it difficult for Binghamton to get into its half-court sets, wearing the Bearcats down.

“We only had four turnovers the whole night in their press,” Cimino said. “I think we turned the ball over a lot in the half court and I think fatigue had a lot to do with that.”

To make matters worse for BU, standout freshman guard Imani

Watkins failed to reach doubledigit scoring on Wednesday for the first time in her last six games.

Extinguished by the Retrievers defense, Watkins was held to just five points and committed seven turnovers.

“We all forget that Imani is a freshman,” Cimino said. “The girl has been the heart and soul of our team. She had a bad game, and everybody has a bad game. She still worked hard and she still kept her head up. I’m proud of her for that.”

Binghamton is scheduled to take the court next when they travel to take on UMass Lowell Sunday. Tip-off is set for 2 p.m. at the Costello Athletic Center.

Playing [from] behind and playing catch up takes a lot out of you — Linda Cimino BU head coach

BINGHAMTON @ UMASS LOWELL Sasha Dolgetta/Contributing Photographer

Junior guard Kim Albrecht scored a team-high 19 points on 8-of-12 shooting, including 3-of-6 from 3-point range, in BU’s loss to UMBC on Wednesday.

SUNDAY, 2 P.M. COSTELLO ATHLETIC CENTER

Garn to compete with the best at NYC Invitational Senior middle-distance runner seeks to set new personal-best in mile run over weekend E.Jay Zarett

Assistant Sports Editor The 2015 New York City Armory Invitational one-mile run on Saturday will feature a star-studded roster. A silver medalist from the 2012 London Olympics and a participant from the 2013 World Track & Field championships are just two of the weekend competitors. But the nine-runner event is also set to feature Binghamton senior Jesse Garn, one of only three collegiate runners chosen to participate.

“My coach told me that I was going to be in this race and I thought ‘Okay, cool,’” Garn said. “It is going to be paced to hopefully run a personal best in the mile, but we didn’t see the start list until last week. When I saw that, it was really impressive.

It looks good.”

The Invitational is Garn’s first major competition of 2015 and will receive national coverage from NBC Sports Network.

Garn will measure his ability against world-renowned runners, including Galen Rupp, who captured the silver medal in the 10,000 meter race at the 2012 Olympics in London.

“Jesse certainly earned this opportunity, but I think it also represents our commitment to helping our athletes achieve at the highest level,” Binghamton head coach Annette Acuff wrote in an email. “You need to experience racing with the best if you want to be the best…Jesse has worked very hard over the last three and a half years to get to this level.”

Garn is coming off of one of the strongest seasons in Binghamton’s men’s track and field program history. He earned the men’s most outstanding track athlete honors at the America East Indoor Championships and competed in the Millrose Games, a prestigious track and field event.

He broke a four-minute mile on March 1, running a personal best 3:59.37 mile at the Boston/Last Chance meet.

These experiences have Garn feeling prepared for the upcoming invitational.

“I just feel more confident going into it,” Garn said. “I’ve gone through the process a couple of times now. This meet I am more excited than nervous to take on some guys that are higher caliber than I am.”

Though he did not qualify for last year’s NCAA championship, Garn’s fresh start with the Armory Invitational will ignite his focus on earning a bid to this year’s final meet, as he hopes to record a new personal best this weekend.

“Last year, my signature race came in Boston when I broke four minutes in the mile,” Garn said.

“That is still my personal best and I didn’t make it to the NCAA championships. They take the top 16 and I was 19 or 21 — right around there. I think that going into this meet, place isn’t going to be a huge factor. A good place would go along with a fast time … I certainly want to improve on my best. I want to run a personal best in the mile and hit an NCAA qualifying time.”

You need to

experience racing with the best if you want to be the best — Annette Acuff BU track and field head coach

Franz Lino/Photo Grumpy

Senior track and field star Jesse Garn will compete against some of the world’s best runners in Saturday’s New York City Armory Invitational. Through the event, he hopes to beat his personal best time of 3:59.37.

NYC ARMORY INVITATIONAL

GARN AT MILLROSE GAMES

GARN AT BOSTON LAST CHANCE MEET

DATE SATURDAY, JANUARY 31

DATE FEBRUARY 15, 2014

DATE MARCH 1, 2014

LOCATION NYC ARMORY

LOCATION NYC ARMORY

LOCATION BOSTON UNIVERSITY

TIME 5:12 P.M.

ONE-MILE TIME :01.10

ONE-MILE TIME 3:59.37

January 30, 2015 | www.bupipedream.com

11

SPORTS

Reed: still at Binghamton

Former star not on men's basketball, but takes courses Ashley Purdy Sports Editor

Klara Rusinko/Assistant Photo Editor

Currently ranked at No. 22 in the nation in his weight class, heavyweight senior Tyler Deuel is looking to extend his win streak to six against Brown and Sacred Heart this weekend.

Two road games in one day for BU Bearcats hope to get back in the win column in Rhode Island Kyle McDonald

Contributing Writer One day, two away matches, two different states. That might seem like a tall task for a team to take down, but thanks to Wednesday’s snowstorm attacking the New England coast, the Binghamton wrestling team will do just that.

The Bearcats (5-7, 3-2 Eastern Intercollegiate Wrestling Association) are set to face Brown at 1 p.m. before traveling to take on Sacred Heart at 7:30 p.m. on Saturday. Binghamton hopes to get back in the win column in facing the two EIWA foes, after the team’s most recent conference

bout ended in a loss to University of Pennsylvania.

BU has yet to find its winning edge this year on a consistent basis.

Accumulating a 3-3 record in their last six matches, the Bearcats have alternated between wins and losses in all of their appearances since Jan. 9. Barring that, the Bearcats have preformed well in conference this year, posting a 3-2 record. BU currently sits in sixth place in the EIWA dual meet standings, with one of those losses coming in a narrow defeat to Columbia, 19-18.

Although the team has struggled with consistency this season, there are bright spots for the Bearcats.

Senior heavyweight Tyler Deuel

has posted a 16-4 overall record this season, including a 10-2 record in dual matches. Currently ranked No. 22 in his weight class in the nation, Deuel continues to lead his team by example.

Senior David White has also risen to the occasion this season for BU. Winning five of his last six matches, White is currently ranked No. 27 in the 125-pound weight class nationally. Upper weight grapplers freshman Steve Schneider and junior Jack McKeever have also added edge to BU’s squad at the 174 and 184-pound spots, respectively.

Like BU, Brown (2-5, 1-2 EIWA) is coming off a big loss to a staunch

conference opponent. The Bears were handily defeated by EIWAleading Bucknell, 28-10.

BU’s second meet on Saturday will be against Scared Heart (010, 0-7 EIWA), who has struggled mightily this year. The Pioneers have yet to win a dual meet this year, and will be looking to upset Binghamton for their first win of the year.

Binghamton’s first match of the day, against Brown, is set to be held at Pizzitola Sports Center in Providence, Rhode Island.

The second match of the day, against Sacred Heart, is set for William H. Pitt Center in Fairfield, Connecticut.

With all the uncertainty and shattered expectations that surrounded the Binghamton men’s basketball team this season, the following news isn’t all that shocking: Former star Jordan Reed is still at Binghamton University.

According to multiple sources close to the program, Reed will not be returning to the team, however. The junior out of Ambler, Pennsylvania is registered for classes and finishing the academic year as a Bearcat, but if he’s in the Events Center, he’ll be on the bleachers, not the floor.

While Reed was reported to have transferred to Tennessee State University, TSU could not confirm his enrollment and stated that he wasn’t registered for classes, in an email sent to Pipe Dream on Jan. 23.

That was fishy, but things made sense when Reed turned up on the Vestal campus for the start of Binghamton’s spring semester.

He can’t be in Tennessee if he’s in Binghamton, after all.

Reasons for Reed’s return to the University are unclear. Either something went awry with the Tigers, or the move is strategic. If Reed has a sufficient number of credits to graduate in May, then he could play at another program immediately as a graduate-student transfer. He could then apply for a waiver from the National Collegiate

Athletic Association to gain an extra year of eligibility under the argument that he left after just five games due to hardship. And in the Transfer U days of college hoops, that tactic is gaining traction.

If he doesn’t graduate, however, then Reed’s eligibility at another Division I program will be postponed to a year after he begins taking classes at his new university.

Regardless, Reed — a 6-foot-4, incredibly athletic guard — will be looking to make an immediate impact wherever he goes. With only one, or at most two, years left to play, there’d be no sense in transferring to a bigger program with a full arsenal. TSU was an ideal program for that reason, but we’ll have to wait to find out where Reed ends up.

JORDAN REED FOR BU IN 2014-15 PLAYED IN FIVE GAMES STARTED ONE GAME AVERAGED 3.6 POINTS AND 3.4 REBOUNDS IN 10.6 MINUTES PER CONTEST SHOT 29 PERCENT FROM THE FLOOR

SPORTS

TRACK AND FIELD

Garn set to compete at NYC Armory Invitational see page 10

Friday, January 30, 2015

Franz Lino/Photo Grumpy

Freshman forward Willie Rodriguez led BU with 15 points and eight rebounds on Wednesday. Freshman center Bobby Ahearn followed with 11 points and six rebounds. Junior guard Karon Waller chipped in nine points on 3-of-4 shooting from the field while sophomore guard Marlon Beck II added nine points, six rebounds and a game-high six assists.

Battered BU trumps even more devastated UMBC Bearcats shoot 48 percent from the field in 68-56 road win, take sixth in AE standings Ashley Purdy Sports Editor

The saying “don’t kick a man when he’s down” gets a little dubious when both you and the other guy are down.

That’s what happened when Binghamton and UMBC — both of whose rosters are severely depleted — went head-to-head on Wednesday night.

But the Bearcats (3-20, 2-6 America East), sporting a 10man deep squad, came out of Retrievers Activity Center with a dominant 68-56 win over their hosts, who have just seven active players.

Freshman forward Willie Rodriguez, who has reached double-figures in scoring in eight of his last 10 games, led the Bearcats with 15 points, eight rebounds and four assists.

And for once, fewer of his points came in the second half than in the first. The 6-foot-6 Orlando, Florida native scored 10 points on 5-of-7 shooting in the first frame, inciting a 7-0 run at the opening gate to set the pace of the game.

During that time, the Retrievers (3-18, 1-7 AE) hit 50 percent of their shots — meaning, they went 1 for 2 from the floor in the first three minutes, thanks to three turnovers stripping them of looks.

That’s the kind of start UMBC had.

Between the Bearcats’ hefty defense and the Retrievers’ sloppy ball-handling, UMBC committed 11 miscues in the first 12 minutes, leading to 10 BU points.

The team hit just 33 percent of its shots from the floor in that time and were down by as many as 14.

Binghamton, on the other

hand, was atypically accurate.

Shooting a conference-low 38.9 percent from the floor this season, Binghamton hit 48 percent of its field goals through the half, which allowed the Bearcats to enter the locker room with a 11-point lead, 33-24.

Not just Rodriguez, but nearly all of the Bearcats were getting shots early. Behind Rodriguez’s 10, sophomore guard Marlon Beck II followed up with seven points, freshman forward Romello Walker contributed six and freshman guard Justin McFadden added five. The team was looking like a well-oiled machine over UMBC, committing just three turnovers in the first period.

Come the second half, the Retrievers showed they wouldn’t roll over. They opened the frame on an 8-3 run behind 3-pointers from freshman guard Jourdan

Grant and sophomore guard Ben Grace. A dunk from senior forward Devarick Houston later, and the Retrievers were within four, 36-32.

Binghamton retaliated quickly, however, with buckets from freshman center Bobby Ahearn and Walker hiking the lead back up to eight, 40-32.

From there on out, the game was Binghamton’s. The Bearcats ended the night on their largest lead — 15 points — after receiving offensive contributions from all but one player who took the floor.

Following Rodriguez in scoring for BU was Ahearn, with 11 points and six rebounds. Junior guard Karon Waller and Beck chipped in nine points apiece, with Beck adding six rebounds and a game-high six assists.

For UMBC, Jourdan Grant scored a game-high 20 points to

go with six rebounds and three assists.

Though the night went well for Binghamton, it was a bit disappointing for UMBC, who received some unfortunate news before they even lost. 2014 Rookie of the Year Rodney Elliott has been out since the beginning of the season with a shoulder injury, and that’s been trying enough.

But the kicker came when graduate transfer guard Wayne Sparrow, who leads UMBC with 13.8 points a game in 2014-15, was announced ineligible to play for the remainder of the season.

So here’s a dark horse story for you: In comes 5-foot-10 sophomore walk-on Ben Grace.

He’d averaged just two points in 11.4 minutes per game when he took the court Wednesday night.

But he took it as a starter, and then he poured in 17 points on 5-of-

12 shooting from 3-point range.

He was one of just six players to take the court for UMBC against Binghamton.

Things aren’t so glum for Binghamton.

The Bearcats currently have a short front court with injuries to 6-foot-9 big men Dusan Perovic and Nick Madray, but Madray may be returning relatively soon. Regardless, head coach Tommy Dempsey praised his starting five on Tuesday, remarking on how well they’re doing. Even when he does return, Madray likely won’t be kicking any of them out of the lineup.

Behind its second win of the season, Binghamton has moved up to the six seed in playoff standings.

Next up is a Saturday home match against UMass Lowell. Tipoff is set for 2 p.m. at the Events Center.