Joe Biden’s fall and Nigeria’s shake

By Festus Adedayo

These falls and tottering may mean nothing to other world leaders, but they should to President Tinubu. As an African, Tinubu should look back, like Biden did, to his teleprompter. Falls and tottering humanize us as the living. They show that we are mere pencil traces on a paper which can be erased in a twinkle of an eye. They guide us to remember our humble past.

America was a pitiable sight last Thursday. That great country was crouched on the bare floor. It fell like a huge hippopotamus. President Joe Biden’s legs were wrapped over each other like a malevolent viper that had just had its backbone yanked apart by an irreverent bullet. America looked helpless. The edges of Biden’s blue suit raised their hands up in surrender, leaving the world gaping through his now visible white singlet. The only thing on him that seemed unfazed by the fall was his blue fez cap. For the first time ever, cameras pierced through the underneath of Biden’s black shoes. Those shoes lay on their sides, even as a Biden security aide was pictured attempting to lift America up. Looking at the faces of the guests on the podium, you could see palpable shock and fright. America fell!

Biden had tripped and fallen immediately after handing out the last diploma at a U.S. Air Force Academy graduation ceremony in Colorado. After he fell, the president caught himself with his hands and immediately got up on a knee. He looked backwards towards a sandbag which supported the teleprompter he used. This confirms the universality of that Yoruba proverb which says, when a child falls, he looks forward to a remedy but when elders do, they look backwards to the roots of the fall. Three of Biden’s aides then sprightly sprang up to his rescue, helped him up as he walked back to his seat. He then sat down as if nothing had happened. Back at the White House, the president joked, “I got sandbagged.”

Olusegun Obasanjo didn’t have such joke as riposte. He had a sound rebuke. In 1995 circa, he had attended a political event at the Gateway Hotel, Sango-Ota, Ogun State. He was ostensibly under the weather but reluctantly elected to come and honour organizers of the event, in spite of his failing health. As he sat on the high table, with the event afoot, human nature took its toll. Vomit daringly coursed through his esophagus, irreverently unmindful that this was once a Commander-in-Chief of the Nigerian Armed Forces. This was an office that imbues its occupant with power of life and death. Like the Yoruba Anikulapo, he had death imprisoned inside his pouch. Obasanjo momentarily grabbed one of the cups in his front on the high table, inside of which was hemmed a serviette paper. By then, the goddamn vomit had burst the door of his mouth open and was ready to spill the content of its cistern. Obasanjo merely offered the glass cup as sacrifice to this rude guest. Then, the vomit forcefully gushed out of his guts.

Ace photographer of the then Third Eye and later, Tribune newspapers, Tomi Adegbite, just like those photographers in Colorado who clicked on as America fell, sprang up his feet and unto the scene. He immediately drew out his camera. Click-click-click, this audacious professional thumbed the button of his camera, photographing Nigeria’s ex-Head of State at his most vulnerable moment. Obasanjo couldn’t care. He soberly attended to the unseen hand that ruled him at that moment. After his Lord and Master, the vomit, had finished its assignment and the cup was filled up, the ex- Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces looked up to behold the photographer. “Ta lo ran e ni’se? Foto lo de nya loju ara e yen o?” – Who sent you? You must think you are taking a shot? he demanded. It was indecipherable. Was it a question, threat or a remark? The photographer didn’t wait to give a reply. As the Yoruba would say, he “na papa bo ra” – literally, disappeared into void. Like Biden’s photo, this too was later published in the Third Eye.

The Biden fall became a piece of narrative to justify Nigeria’s tottering last week. It was spearheaded by those who believe in the Messiahnism of the current landlord of Aso Rock. A few days before Biden’s, Nigeria almost fell too. It was on May 29, 2023 at the Eagle Square. A clandestine video recording said to be of President Bola Tinubu at his swearing-in, went viral. As celebration enveloped Nigeria and the atmosphere of conviviality wrapped the Eagle Square, the president allegedly made for the podium to address the world. From the video, we saw a president who shook tremulously like a stormpropelled chandelier. His ADC briskly fled after him as he tottered like one in the dark, seeming to want to fall. Or, could the president have been drunk that early morning? This reminded the audience of the biblical apostles accused by their Jew brethren of being drunk early in the morning. The charge was later disputed by Peter the apostle who reminded them that Jews seldom drank alcohol before nine in the morning. So, was Nigeria’s president drunk on the day of his joy?

Or, was he drunk on something? Or, ill? After his fall last June in America, Biden’s doctors came out to tell the world that he does not drink alcohol nor use tobacco and exercises “at least” five times a week. The fall came as Biden dismounted his bicycle and snared a foot in a toe clip of the cycle. He had taken a weekend trip to the Gordons Pond area of the Rehoboth Beach, Delaware. Just as he did in Colorado, Biden stood up immediately, waved and said, “I’m good. I got my foot caught up.”

Immediately, his doctors declared him healthy and fit for duty after they conducted physical examination on him. The White House thereafter issued a release saying the president did not require any medical attention. Nigerians were not that lucky. After Nigeria tottered at the Eagle Square last Monday, mum was the word. There was even no official reaction to the viral video. We expected to be told, as usual, that the video was photo-shopped; and that some shaky and tremulous character, not our president, was imported into that viral video. Neither did we get a medical reaction similar to the one from Biden’s physicians telling us that “President Tinubu does not drink alcohol nor use tobacco or any other harmful substance and exercises on the treadmill ‘at least’ five times a week.”

Tinubu wasn’t the first leader of a people to totter that pitiably. Indeed, he has no reason to worry about falling. Falls have almost become an imprimatur of the world presidency. One world leader, who once fell or nearly fell, was Boris Johnson. Curated by the British press as having a nonchalant approach to governance with his hair uncombed and shirts flown out, untucked, in 2015, Boris hit tabloid headlines as he slipped at a charity tug-of-war game organized for a World War I commemoration event holding at the Thames River. Clenching his teeth and grimacing, Johnson pulled hard in the game as he fell, losing his footing on the muddy grass. He exclaimed, “oh bugger!”

Then another photograph emerged. It was of President Tinubu at a meeting with CBN and NNPCL heads. He was cosseted by his wife, Remi. Though they claimed it was not an official meeting, what was Mrs. Tinubu doing at an official meeting presided over by her husband? Was Nigeria about to witness an imperial presidency where the queen and king reigned? This question accompanied the viral photograph of the event. It reminded me of one verse of the Ifa corpus that inveighed leaders who import their women into the theatre of power.

The narrative went thus: The Olufimo, who was a king, got pestered by his newly wedded wife to take her to the Oro cult, a ritual that forbade the presence of women in traditional Yoruba society. When the pestering became almost like a pestilence, Olufimo, in the bid to wave off a far more pestilential matrimonial crisis, had no choice than smuggle the woman into the Oro groove. He did this by hiding her inside the apere – the traditional seat of the king. As the initiates gathered for the ceremony, the babalawo struck the chord of the Ifa deity thrice on the pouch but the deity refused to communicate with the initiates as it used to do. Then, the Ifa priest sought the face of the god in a different way and commanded that the Olufimo’s apere be ransacked for the cause of the blockage of communication by the Oro cult from the living. The Ifa narrative expressed this thus in Yoruba –Ohun lo di’fa fun Olufimo Akoko ni’jo ti o f’aya e j’oye; ape’fa, ifa o je o, a p’oro, oro o mi titi o, e je a ye’nu apere oba wo. The Olufimo and his wife were then beheaded for the sacrilege they brought upon the land.

On the social media, Nigerians did their own “beheading” via commentaries dragging the First Family. Questions were asked on the nature of this unfolding government. Would the First Lady be attending Executive Council meetings too? Was this part of the un-communicated handover note that Mrs. Aisha Buhari left for the pastor? “Learn lessons from my isolation in the Villa. Take charge, from the word go!” Was that what she said? Or was that Nigerian Christians’ own way of achieving a Muslim/Christian presidential parity?

Some very naughty persons however reasoned that the First Lady was cosseting her husband all over the place not necessarily to flaunt her feminine power but to physically monitor his fragile health. Didn’t Yoruba say that the plate is not displaying arrogance when it diffidently insists that it must have its own soup poured right on its face? – oju awo l’awo fi ngb’obe. No one, not even a doctor, can decipher when the indicators are going wrong like the woman who had witnessed the indicators slide dangerously in the past.

Did President Gerald Ford’s wife, like Remi, dot on him too after he fell? Ford fell exactly the same day, 48 years earlier from the day Biden fell in Colorado. On June 1, 1975, Ford had been captured in a photograph flung on the floor yakata like a castrated puppy. The very embarrassing event had occurred overseas as the president disembarked the Air Force One in Salzburg, the rainy Austrian city. His wife beside him, Ford, who was by then 61 years old, had lost his balance as he walked down the wet steps of the aircraft. He then skidded off down the remaining stairs. The almighty president of America ended up folded in a heap by the tarmac. Flummoxed, officials stampeded round themselves to get America back on its feet. Later while delivering his speech, Ford had said: “Thank you for your gracious welcome to Salzburg, and I am sorry I tumbled in.” Festus Adedayo is a Public Policy Analyst.

Will President Tinubu make Nigerians love their leaders?

By Paul Aboh

Nigerians do not believe in their political leaders anymore. There is growing intense pressure among the people. The economic downturn is hurting most families and the minuses are setting in. Society is decaying. Nigerians are disenchanted with the difficult situation as it is at present.

Former President Muhammadu Buhari’s government was an unmitigated disaster. In 2015, his government came in with a lot of promise. But after eight years in power, it failed to revive the comatose economy. He failed to resolve Nigeria’s manifold security challenges. He left behind dilapidated infrastructure and a hungry people eating from dustbins. And the result is an angry populace; very very unhappy about his taciturn disposition and his unconcerned propensities and insensitivity to the plight of the masses.

History will not be kind to Major General Muhammadu Buhari and the government he ran for eight solidly wasted years. Definitely, Nigerians will not miss Buhari. Corruption and poverty are widespread because of his crude leadership style. And families have been ripped apart by the manifold effects of an underperforming economy. Divorce rates are high as a lot of spouses lose out on hitherto healthy relationships. Many wives have had cause to walk out of their matrimonial homes so as to search for so-called greener pastures. A lot of men cannot provide the basics for their children and long-suffering partners. And just as Chinua Achebe observed in his classical novel, “Things have fallen apart” and the center cannot just hold for most families thereby making the people angry, bitter and disillusioned.

Over 95 million Nigerians live below the poverty line. The masses feel they have been ignored and abandoned. And so they have the right to seek for their rights.

Maybe if our leaders’ heads weren’t buried in the sand of ignorance and they took the time to understand, instead of judging and thinking it won’t happen to them because they have the perfect family, perfect and stable income, life would be a little bit tolerable. This hits close to home for me, for family, friends and neighbours who live under this shadow of lack, poverty and deprivation. Millions of Nigerians are unemployed, underemployed, hungry and poor in a country that is richly blessed by God, but massively and illicitly harvested by mostly greedy and heartless politicians and exploited by some opportunistic religious potentates. Indeed, Politics and Religion, in Nigeria have become the Opium of the people.

The harsh economic situation has also disconnected friends and allies. In the most difficult moments of life you come to realize who your true friends are, and the people who really appreciate you. Most family and friends disconnect with you once your economic fortune nosedives. They vote with their feet and walk away treating you like a leper.

I decided to pen this message in support of all those who continue to battle psychologically with the ill treatment they receive from so-called friends and family whenever they are perceived to belong to the wrong side of the economic ladder. This is to tell you that you aren’t abandoned. Help is coming. God will send helpers. He will not let you down. When the children ask for bread, the father will not give them stones.

Nigerians do not believe in their political leaders anymore. There is growing intense pressure among the people. The economic downturn is hurting most families and the minuses are setting in. Society is decaying. Nigerians are disenchanted with the difficult situation as it is at present.

Where will help come from?

Our religious bodies have a big role to play in helping to checkmate these ugly economic trends. Nigerians are tired of eating from the crumbs that falls from the rich men’s table. We don’t need piecemeal attention but consistently consistent proactive action to eliminate poverty completely. Our Politicians have failed us. They mostly are interested in amassing personal wealth for the direct benefit of a select few. Folks can be trained and financially and materially empowered to help jumpstart their domestic economies. When we empower the women, we help build sustainable families. And on the long run, no one will come and beg from you. Millions can be taken off the poverty ladder in this process. The crime rates will reduce, prostitution and drug abuse will reduce and several vices will be eliminated drastically.

More economic health awareness is urgently needed. Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean people aren’t suffering. Go to the villages, slums, ghettos and towns of your City. The people need help. The people are suffering. They need Good Samaritans. And yes, you could be one.

Please, try to spare a little of your time with someone who may just want to talk (about anything). Talking can help us all cope a little more, keeping things bottled up just makes it worse. Most people will say, “if you need anything, don’t hesitate to call me, I’ll be there to help you” but will they?

Finally, the pertinent question now is: will the newly crowned President Bola Ahmed Tinubu change the narrative, govern well and make Nigerians begin to have faith in their leaders in view of Buhari’s eight years maladministration? Only time will tell!

Paul Aboh, a public analyst, writes from Abuja

Benue PDP congratulates Fr. Alia on inauguration as Governor

From Uche Nnorom, Makurdi

The Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) in Benue State has congratulated Rev. Fr. Hyacinth Iormem Alia, over his successful inauguration into office as the 6th civilian Governor of the state.

The party in a statement signed by its Publicity Secretary Bemgba Iortyom on Wednesday prayed God Almighty to sustain the new Governor and give him the wisdom and grace needed for the task he has undertaken.

Bemgba also, said the PDP has now assumed the station of the main opposition bloc in the state, with all sense of duty, maintaining that they will discharge the responsibility with utmost sense of patriotism to Benue, Nigeria and humanity at large, in the belief that good governance is a combination of the workings of the government on seat and the activities of a robust opposition to it.

“Hear him “our conduct will be guided by a consciousness of our rich culture and heritage as the most successful political party, both at the national level and here in the state, since Nigeria’s independence in 1960.

“In Benue State PDP having held and discharged the popular mandate of governance in 21 out of the 24 years of the current democratic dispensation since 1999, can proudly lay claim to almost the entirety of the developmental legacy on ground within this period.

This is a legacy as was laid from 1999 to 2007 under Governor George Akume, then built upon from 2007 to 2011 under Governor Gabriel Suswam, and consolidated upon in the last 5 years of the administration of Governor Samuel Ortom when it came under the party’s control.

Our great party is satisfied that the governmental administrations which held sway under its sponsorship have left in place a solid pedestal upon which to further the advancement of the Benue project by the new administration of Governor Hyacinth Alia.

“From the security architecture painstakingly rigged into place (the Livestock Guards and the Community Volunteer Guards) audaciously signposted in the Anti Open Grazing Law, against monumental daunting odds, to the depth of interventions in the educational, health care and agricultural sectors of the economy, to the the asphalted roads in Makurdi metropolis and elsewhere in the state for ease of travel, to the quality of the official residential and work accommodation bequeathed to the new Governor, PDP has ran its lap of the race and handed over the baton as required under law.

“Our great party will not flinch from its duty of keeping the new administration on its toes all of the time, the sole purpose being to get it to work maximally within the span of time allowed it.”