Reflections - Winter, 2023

Providing Comfort and Compassion (p. 2)

Your Gifts Are Supp orting Families Through Grief

Providing Comfort and Compassion

Samantha Sheaffer has always been a natural caretaker. Even in her own family, she always took care of everyone. Both of her grandmothers were nurses. Her mother worked for Masonic Village when she was in high school.

So, it was no surprise that Samantha would follow in their career footsteps, becoming a certified nursing assistant (CNA) with Masonic Village Hospice.

CNAs provide vital support to both patients and nurses, from transporting, bathing and feeding hospital patients to stocking medical supplies and logging patient information. There are currently seven CNAs working with Masonic Village Hospice.

Samantha has been a CNA for 16 years, and has worked for Masonic Village Hospice since 2017. She most enjoys the personal relationships she forms with the patients.

“You become part of their family,” she said.

“There is something to be said for being with a patient and their family during one of the hardest times in their lives and being able to provide comfort and compassion,” she said. “I love that about Hospice. Being there for these families and making a difference in their lives is very meaningful.”

The most difficult part of Samantha’s job is seeing the pain families go through when a loved one is

declining. “I lost both my parents at a young age, and I know the pain these families feel,” she said.

COVID-19 was one of the biggest challenges for everyone on the nursing team, Samantha said. The confusion

and uncertainty at the beginning of the pandemic was difficult to work through.

“We wanted to reassure our patients that they were going to be okay,” she said. “We all tried to provide as much emotional support as we could.”

Samantha Sheaffer

Another CNA, Sonni Boyer, started with Masonic Village Hospice in 2014. She left briefly in 2019, and returned to Masonic Village in May 2022. She is glad to be back with patients.

“It’s so rewarding when I can help someone else,” she said. “I love getting to know our patients on a personal level and spending quality time with them, whether it’s taking them outside for fresh air, styling their hair, painting their nails or talking to them about their lives and adventures.”

Hospice team members create attachments and bonds with their patients, and they become part of their lives.

“Saying goodbye is not an easy feat,” she said. “I’m very thankful to be able to provide our patients and families comfort when they need it most.”

Share Your Heart with Hospice Patients: Become a Volunteer

Volunteer orientations train and educate interested individuals about how to become a Hospice volunteer.

Topics discussed include: the history and philosophy of hospice care, family dynamics and boundaries, effective communication, end-of-life expectations, dementia, bereavement, spiritual care, veteran programs, infection control and volunteer procedures, duties, responsibilities and documentation.

For more information, contact Angela Ortiz, volunteer coordinator, Masonic Village Hospice, at 717-367-1121, ext. 33024.

Sonni Boyer

Lucky Until the End

Lilliam Kingsbury graduated with honors with a chemistry degree from Wayne State University at only 19, after immigrating to the United States from Cuba. Later, with three boys in tow, she went on to earn a master’s degree and a PhD in statistics.

“She never graduated from high school,” her husband, William Kingsbury, said. “She went right from Cuba’s grammar school into college. She started college at 15 years old. She was the smartest person I have ever known.”

Lilliam was a distinguished professor of statistics and advanced mathematics, specializing in the field of biostatistics. She was elected by her peers to be president of the American Statistical Association. So, when she was hit with the news that she had a malignant glioblastoma tumor in her brain in September 2018, the statistician side of Lilliam understood better than anyone what the diagnosis meant, according to her son, Masonic Villages CEO William. “Bill” L. Kingsbury.

“She knew exactly what the odds were of surviving, and they were not good,” he said. “Even though her prognosis was dire, she never lost faith or hope. She was determined to enjoy life as long as she could. She was amazing.”

Lilliam died at home on Nov. 30, 2019, at the age of 72, after being cared for by Masonic Village Hospice over the span of about 16 weeks. The compassion and care shown by Hospice team members to the whole family, which included

his father and two brothers, Scott and Russ, was truly remarkable, Bill said.

“Just the experience of them having helped other people through very difficult circumstances was reassuring,” he said. “Of course, it’s tough and emotional, but there’s a very spiritual component to hospice.”

“Everyone from Hospice went above and beyond,” William said. “They knew what I was going through. They made me feel comfortable. They would come and do her nails, and I would get an hour or so to go to the store. I really appreciated that.”

Bill remembers fondly how one of his mother’s caregivers discovered his father loved pies. She made him his favorite, a cherry pie.

“That was so important to my dad,” he said. After Lilliam passed, Hospice staff continued to check on the family and provide grief support.

An Organic Start to a Blessed Union

While earning her bachelor’s degree at Wayne State, Lilliam met William in her organic chemistry class.

(Above): Lilliam with her three sons, Scott, Bill and Russ. (Below) Lilliam and William.

The two fell in love and were married for 52 years.

“The secret to our marriage is we were like yin and yang,” William said. “We weren’t exactly the same, so we complemented each other very well.”

While Lilliam was pursuing her PhD in statistics, she taught mathematics at Saint Joseph’s University and then Villanova. She helped grow a tiny start-up into one of the world’s largest clinical research organizations and later joined a large pharmaceutical company as executive vice president.

William led the oncology and anti-infective research and development areas of what is now GlaxoSmithKline. The couple purchased a beach house in Wilmington, N.C., in 2004, two years before William retired. He still resides there today.

Even after retiring, Lilliam never stopped really “working,” since she always liked helping people.

“If any of us needed anything, she’d jump on a plane and be there,” Bill said. “She was an amazingly generous person and one of deep faith. She found joy and humility in serving her church as a Eucharistic minister.”

She was a true “Renaissance woman” who enjoyed and excelled at many different activities and hobbies, William said. She played piano, which helped soothe her following her diagnosis and the first of three brain surgeries. She loved music of all sorts, from Cuban to country. She painted. She was a whiz with a sewing machine, making professional quality curtains, cushions and even clothing. She devoured books and loved to dance.

“She was really talented in almost everything she did,” William said. “When I was in graduate school, she made my sports coats for me. When the kids were young, she made her own dresses. She could do anything.”

Lilliam also really enjoyed traveling. She and William invited each of their nine grandchildren to take a trip with them when they reached 10 years of age. Just before her diagnosis, she had taken their youngest grandchild to the Galápagos Islands. The couple then traveled back to Wilmington to shore up the beach house because a hurricane was forecasted. Lilliam was having trouble with words and articulating what she wanted to say.

“The doctor said she may be having mini-strokes and to take her immediately to the hospital,” William said. “The

CT scan showed she had a tumor. We drove back to Pennsylvania to Jefferson Hospital, where she was treated.”

Even when chemotherapy, radiation and surgery failed to shrink the tumor, Lilliam never complained about her condition or her prognosis.

“To be sure, she wished she had more time here with us,” Bill said. “But she felt lucky and blessed right to the end.”

As a proud Mason and Past Master of Melita Lodge No. 295, Philadelphia, Bill wanted to place his mother with Masonic Village Hospice, a place that deeply reflects his own Masonic values. He knew she’d receive great care.

“The Masonic fraternity has shaped our charities,” he said. “I think the Hospice program itself is exceptional because of that Masonic culture.”

He shudders to think how difficult it would have been for the family to cope through losing their matriarch without the help of Hospice.

“We were completely unequipped to deal with the emotional hurricane that was taking place,” Bill said. “The four of us, my dad included, were unapologetic and proud mama’s boys. She was the glue that kept everything together. The Hospice team provided stability and comfort.”

“It’s not a long time that they touch your life, but you are so vulnerable, and their impact is so profound.”

William with his three sons.

Attention: NEW Law!

Your Charitable Gift Annuity will provide these benefits:

• Payments to you or you and your spouse for the rest of your lives

• Tax-free distributions from your IRA to fund the annuity

• The ability to support Masonic Village Hospice when the annuity ends.

You can now make a once-in-a-lifetime distribution of up to $50,000 to fund a Charitable Gift Annuity (CGA) from the Masonic Charities.

What you need to know:

• Anyone 701/2 or older can apply.

• You do not need to be a Mason.

• Annuity rates start at 5% and can go as high as 9.5%, depending on your age.

• You can purchase an annuity for yourself or for you and your spouse.

• Your distribution can count toward your Required Minimum Distribution (RMD) as a Qualified Charitable Distribution (QCD), thereby avoiding taxes on your RMD.

Thank You to Our Donors

Memorials

Gifts received Aug. 1 - Oct. 31

MEMORIAL DONOR

Dorothy Andes

Nancy Biehl

Irene Blaskiewicz

Sharon Weist Blough

Charles F. Snyder Funeral Home and Crematory, Inc.

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Big E Booster Club

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Trout CPA

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Charles F. Snyder Funeral Home and Crematory, Inc.

Bryan and Eileen Hill

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Slekovac, Richard Parrish, Jr.,

Keith Parrish & Betsy Parrish

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Dee Molinari

Margie Morris

Lloyd Pickell

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Shirley Lou Thomas

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Carol Yeagley

Harold and Christine Yeagley

MASONIC VILLAGE HOSPICE

98 Masonic Drive, Suite 101 • Elizabethtown, PA 17022

717-361-8449 • MasonicVillageHospice.org

Who We Are

Since 2009, Masonic Village’s trained, compassionate hospice staff have cared for thousands of patients and their families, focusing on the physical, emotional, social and spiritual needs of patients so they may complete their lives joyfully. Our hospice staff promote comfort and self-determination, enabling patients to participate in making decisions about their care.

Based in Elizabethtown, Masonic Village Hospice is pleased to offer services to patients in the comfort of their homes throughout Lancaster, Dauphin, Lebanon and Eastern York counties.

Masonic Village Hospice does not discriminate against any person on the basis of race, color, religion, disability, ancestry, national origin, familial status, age, sex, limited English proficiency (LEP) or any other protected status in admission, treatment or participation in its programs, services and activities, or in employment.

Masonic Village Hospice cumple con las leyes federales de derechos civiles aplicables y no discrimina por motivos de raza, color, nacionalidad, edad, discapacidad o sexo.

Masonic Village Hospice iss willich, die Gsetze (federal civil rights) vun die Owwerichkeet zu folliche un duht alle Leit behandle in der seem Weg. Es macht nix aus, vun wellem Schtamm ebber beikummt, aus wellem Land die Voreldre kumme sinn, was fer en Elt ebber hot, eb ebber en Mann iss odder en Fraa, verkrippelt iss odder net.