Community Matters The Glen at Aberdeen Heights
December 2017
5 steps to keep the peace this holiday season Avoid resentment and friction at gatherings Our expectations of family members and a desire to have a heartwarming, joyful time with them seem to peak during holiday gatherings.Yet that’s precisely when relatives can be at their worst, replaying old grievances and interacting in incredibly unproductive ways. To help prevent disappointment and ensure a happier season, try applying these five strategies: 1. Bury the hatchet. Nothing will chase the cheer and deepen chasms faster than engaging dysfunction. So, during the visit, do your utmost to give up trying to change anyone’s thoughts and actions. Simply observe the goings-on rather than interact with them. Reshape your mindset and resolve not to engage with taunts or baiting comments. Aim for a spirit of forgiveness rather than assuming a warrior stance. This isn’t easy, but it’s essential if you want to free
Celebrate Christmas
Join us in celebrating the holidays Join us for our resident and family Christmas Party from 6 to 7:30 p.m. on Dec. 5. Enjoy music, appetizers and much more. Valet parking will be available. Please check your calendars for other upcoming holiday events such as the Aberdeen Choir on Dec. 11. Robinson and other area schools will be marching through the building caroling for you, as well as violin students from Kirkwood and more.
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A proud member of Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America
Honoring our veterans Residents, staff and veterans gathered for brunch to celebrate and honor all veterans.
Community Matters is published monthly for residents and friends of Aberdeen Heights by Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organization. Learn more at: PresbyterianManors.org. James “Jamie� Kneen, executive director To submit or suggest articles for this publication, contact Loretta Cutler, health care lifestyle coordinator, lcutler@pmma.org.
A spook-tacular sight Halloween fun with residents, family and friends Our next door neighbors at Robinson School delighted us with a costume parade at Halloween! Approximately 600 children and teachers dressed in costume and paraded through our parking lot for Halloween. What a treat!
Telephone: 314-909-6010 Address: 505 Couch Ave., Kirkwood, MO 63122 Our mission: We provide quality senior services guided by Christian values.
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Community Matters December 2017
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unrealistic standards of perfection when getting things ready for the holiday and add a sense of failure and self-judgment to the already burdensome load we’re carrying.
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yourself from emotions that can hold you captive. If there’s work to be done — on yourself and your relationships (and when isn’t there?) — you can undertake that effort after the holiday. 2. Hold your tongue. When it comes to our grown kids, aging parents and in-laws, we tend to reflexively blurt things out without a second thought. That can hurt someone’s feelings. And often, there’s huge irony in the context. For example, we may comment on our adult children’s weight while serving calorieunconscious foods we spent days preparing or we might blame them for lack of communication after they’ve flown across the country to spend time with us. Our barbs and impatience in regard to aging parents and in-laws — from their slow movements or poor hearing to memory glitches — can cut them to the quick and turn a holiday gathering sour. Like us on Facebook
“Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates,” advised Rumi, a 13th-century Persian poet, philosopher, theologian and teacher. “At the first gate, ask yourself, ‘Is it true?’ At the second ask, ‘Is it necessary?’ At the third gate ask, ‘Is it kind?’” To my mind, it’s a good idea to run everything we say to family members through this sage’s filter. 3. Simplify and reduce stress. In order to be able to follow steps 1 and 2, we need to be at our best — well rested and calm.Yet, we tend to stretch ourselves to our limits at holiday time by going all out.
So, this season, try another approach. Start by distinguishing what’s really essential from what’s not and draw a line in the sand. Eliminate anything from your to-do list that isn’t a must-do. Then, get help accomplishing what remains and threatens to leave you feeling exhausted, stressed or resentful. If you can’t get the support you need for your task, don’t take it on. 4. Divvy up and delegate responsibilities, from shopping and cooking to setting the table and cleaning up. Also, consider making the holiday meal a potluck and give yourself permission to buy prepared foods. We can all take cues from youngsters, who seem to have an instinctive ability to prioritize fun over extreme effort. When the older kids stage a ‘friendsgiving’ the host makes the main dish, sets the table and provides ice; virtually every other chore and food item is “outsourced” to the guests.
5. Steal moments of relaxation. Holidays are supposed to include down time, so build breaks into your schedule before, during and after your gatherings. Book alone time and leisurely walks and don’t skip your established exercise or meditation routines; they’re even Most of us don’t actually have the more vital during high-stress, hightime or energy required for all this calorie periods. Remember, ‘tis frenetic activity and we can get supposed to be the season to be jolly totally drained before our family and and grateful.You’ll improve your friends even arrive. To make matters odds if you put a concrete action plan into motion. worse, we often hold ourselves to We prep complex recipes, festoon our rooms with elaborate decorations, shape guest accommodations that rival posh hotels and fight massive holiday crowds while shopping for gifts that rack up debt and clog closets.
The Glen at Aberdeen Heights
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505 Couch Ave. Kirkwood, MO 63122 Return Service Requested
Tell about your activities We will feature our activity professionals in an upcoming issue of Community Matters. If you know an activity professional with a story to tell, or if you want to share how participating in activities at your campus keeps your mind sharp and your body well, or if you just want to tell the world what you love about living in your senior living community, we want to share the story. Contact Loretta Cutler, health care lifestyle coordinator, and your story could be featured in an upcoming edition of Community Matters.
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Community Matters December 2017
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