Commun ty Matters Emporia Presbyterian Manor
April 2019
Alice Kalb breaks ground at the first Presbyterian Manor.
Presbyterian Manor system to celebrate 70 years On April 19, Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America (PMMA) will celebrate its 70th anniversary. Our first very first community opened in Newton, Kan., on April 19, 1949, nearly two years after 90-year-old Alice Kalb of El Dorado, Kan., asked the United Presbyterian Synod if it would consider opening a home for the aged. A small exploratory committee formed to look at the idea and determined it had merit. To raise funds for the Newton effort, a dedicated offering throughout the synod took place on Mother’s Day in 1948. The practice of raising funds for Presbyterian Manors on Mother’s Day continues today. The first resident, Mrs. Frances Belle Townsend of Smith Center, Kan., moved into the first ANNIVERSARY, continued on page 6
Our volunteers make all the difference Our community is blessed to have a number of volunteers dedicated to making life easier and more joyful for our residents and staff. As we celebrate Volunteer Appreciation Week April 7-13, we’re putting the spotlight on several of them who make a difference in our community every day. Larry and Linda DeDonder For at least three years, Larry and Linda DeDonder have been faithfully visiting our community on Thursday afternoons to pray the rosary with residents. Once a month, they also do a communion service. It’s something they got involved with through their church, Sacred Heart Catholic Church. “It helps us keep tabs on the residents’ health and condition and it helps us put them in the mind of spirituality because all of them are Catholic and we feel that helps them maintain contact with the church through us,” said Larry. The couple also enjoys entertaining the residents by square dancing for them a couple times a year. VOLUNTEERS, continued on page 2
VOLUNTEERS, continued from page 1
Ann Doudican
“We come out and perform/ demonstrate our square dance moves to entertain them. It’s good exercise and good fellowship,” said Larry.
Before she got involved with our community’s mission committee, Ann was involved in the early fundraising efforts that helped get Emporia Presbyterian Manor started 35 years ago. In 2000, when her mother moved in to our community, Ann was asked to join the advisory committee, and now serves on the mission committee. If there’s an event with a registration table, you’ll most likely find her there. She especially enjoys the Veteran’s Breakfast and has enjoyed living here since 2017.
When they’re not volunteering at Presbyterian Manor, Linda volunteers for Birth Right and Larry volunteers with the Retired Volunteer Seniors Program and is on a committee for the Salvation Army and the Didde Student Catholic Center. “We retired over three years ago, and one of our goals when we retired was to do things together, give back as a couple and set a good example,” said Larry.
Community Matters is published monthly for residents and friends of Emporia Presbyterian Manor by Presbyterian Manors of MidAmerica Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organization. Learn more at PresbyterianManors.org. Susan Siepelmeier, executive director Crystal Stock, marketing director To submit or suggest articles for this publication, contact Crystal Stock, marketing director, cstock@pmma.org.
Telephone: 620-343-2613 Fax: 620-343-9195 Address: 2300 Industrial Rd., Emporia, KS 66801-6636 Our mission: We provide quality senior services guided by Christian values. EmporiaPresbyterianManor.org
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Community Matters April 2019
“I love this place. This has been dear to my heart for 35 years, and it’s a wonderful place to live. It’s amazing that some of the people who are employed here were here when my mother was here. That doesn’t happen often in a retirement community. It says something about the quality of people they employ. It’s a home community, and you’re family here,” said Ann. Kathryn Martin A member of the mission committee for almost a year, Kathryn got involved with our community because a friend of hers works here. Since then, her involvement has grown. “I’m on the mission committee, and we help with things like the luminary fundraiser and other events. I love meeting the residents and knowing that our work goes to a great cause. Emporia Presbyterian Manor is an amazing place with great staff, and any way I can give back to them, you can count on it,” said Kathryn. Phyl Stutzman Phyl has volunteered at two Presbyterian Manor communities— Lawrence Presbyterian Manor from
2006-2009 and in our community since 2015. She is a pastor at Emporia Presbyterian Church, one of the five local churches that provide Sunday afternoon chapel each week. In addition to her pastoral duties, Phyl also serves on our mission committee. “I love the vibrancy and intentional community of Emporia’s Presbyterian Manor. The residents are a delight to get to know and visit with. The programs I’ve been able to help with really bring people together, tap into a wide variety of interests, and take seriously the ongoing life and liveliness of the community members. Working with the Manor staff is also quite a joy. “Everyone at the Manors takes their job quite seriously and exhibits a very real sense of care and compassion for everyone within the Manor community. To be a small part of such a large, loving group does my soul good,” said Phyl. Bill Wayman Bill moved in to independent living in 2010 and was quick to get involved as a volunteer with resident activities. He especially loves assisting with Bingo and painting classes, but it’s not uncommon to find him helping his neighbors get their mail and meals or just walking with them around the campus to provide security and companionship. “I like living here, volunteering and helping others,” said Bill. Other members of the Emporia Presbyterian Manor Mission Committee are John Sanderson, George Walters, Miles Shirk, Robert Symmonds, Don Bailey and Jim Pickert. VOLUNTEERS, continued on page 5 Like us on Facebook
Leaving a legacy no matter how much money you have By Richard Eisenberg Next Avenue
Leaving a legacy — sounds like something only wealthy people can do, right? Like making a giant bequest to a university or passing on a significant estate to your children. Actually, though, a new Bank of America Merrill Lynch/Age Wave survey and the new book by Canadian sociologist and researcher Lyndsay Green, “The Well Lived-Life: Live With Purpose and Be Remembered,” suggest that leaving a legacy is not necessarily about money. “We are all leaving a legacy, whether we like it or not,” said Green. “Our legacy is a combination of the way we live every day and the impact it has on our friends, our family, our community and the world, as well as how we prepare others for life without us. Leaving a legacy is a way to let others appreciate our love and our consideration for them because we took the time to plan ahead for the impact our absence would have on them.” Nicely put, I think. And Green’s book provides plenty of smart, thoughtful, easy ways to leave a legacy for your loved ones — a personal legacy and a financial one. For the latest in its excellent series of life-stage reports, “Leaving a Legacy: A Lasting Gift to Loved Ones,” Bank of America Merrill Lynch/Age Wave surveyed more than 3,000 adults (2,600 of them 55 and older) and conducted focus groups about end-of-life planning and leaving a legacy. Some of the results were disconcerting, surprising and even uplifting.
Here are a few of them, along with views about the findings from Age Wave founder and CEO Ken Dychtwald and Kevin Hindman, national trust executive for Bank of America Merrill Lynch, plus views from Green: The public’s definition of a “life well lived” is more about love and less about lucre. A full 94 percent of survey respondents said the definition of a life well lived is “having friends and family that love me.” That was followed by 75 percent who said it’s about “having made a positive impact on society.” Only 10 percent said a life well lived is defined by “accumulating a lot of wealth.” In the survey, Dychtwald said, “we saw a lot of people reflecting on who is the version of themselves that people will think of in their remaining years or after they’re gone. It wasn’t about the number of Instagram followers they had.”
After she told people she interviewed about this exercise, some changed their lives to leave the legacy they wished. One woman repaired a rift with her brother. Some people started volunteering more. Others gave more money away. Some wrote wills or updated the ones they had. Some started writing memoirs. People want to be remembered for how they lived, not what they did at work or how much money they amassed. A striking 69 percent of survey respondents said they most want to be remembered for “the memories I’ve shared with my loved ones.” By contrast, only 9 percent said “career success” and a puny 4 percent said “accumulated wealth.” Incidentally, these views were pretty consistent among respondents at all income levels.
If you’re in your 50s or 60s, it’s not too late to work on “becoming the person you want people to most remember,” Dychtwald said. When Green was researching Recently, he sat down with his grown her book, she was given a legacy daughter, took out a digital recorder exercise: “Imagine life ended abruptly and told her some stories about his right now and tomorrow would be a life. “Most of it she had never heard world with me. What responsibilities and she so appreciated it,” he noted. and commitments would be left “She thanked me for the gift.You dangling? And what messes — know, leaving a legacy doesn’t have to concrete and emotional — would I want to have sorted out?” LEGACY, continued on page 6 Emporia Presbyterian Manor
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2019 AiA calendar features talented local artists It’s hard to believe it’s already April and summer is just around the corner! If you’re counting down the days to warmer weather, there’s a good chance you’re using this year’s Art is Ageless® calendar, featuring the artwork of seniors, including some from within our walls and out in the Emporia community. When we revealed the 2019 calendar,
we invited the winning artists to join us for a reveal party and asked them to sign their work in the calendar for others. Some of them were surprised when they found where their art was placed in the calendar. “John King was very shocked to see he had made the front page with his masterpiece, ‘Bubbles.’ Joan Butts was surprised to find they included a new
section in the back of the calendar that featured her art. Overall, it was a fun part and a great way to celebrate the success of our local artists,” said Crystal Stock, marketing director. Stay tuned to hear this year’s winners of the Art is Ageless competition later this month!
Paul Johnston has won in the amateur painting category many times over the years.
“Beautiful Christmas Night” by resident Nona Thompson.
John King won in the professional painting category for “Bubbles” that is featured inside the calendar as well as on the cover.
Joan Butts, a resident in our Villa, with her winning piece from the handstitched quilting category.
“The Changing Beauty of Spring,” painting by George Walters, independent living resident.
“Wild Wild Roses,” drawing by Kay Smalley.
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Community Matters June 2016
Art is AgelessÂŽ call for entries underway Emporia Presbyterian Manor has issued a call for entries for the Art is AgelessÂŽ juried exhibit to be held April 10-30, 2019. Entries of artistic works will be accepted from any area artist who is 65 years of age or older to exhibit and/or compete for an opportunity to be featured in the 2020 Art is Ageless calendar. Artists may choose to enter the exhibit only. For the competition, works are to have been completed in the past five years (since January 2014). There are nine categories, as
well as designations of amateur or professional. Works to be entered for judging need to be at Presbyterian Manor by April 5. Local competition winners will join winners from 16 other Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America communities to be judged at the systemwide level. In addition to the exhibit, Emporia Presbyterian Manor will honor local senior artists during a reception at the community at 3:30 p.m. on Friday, April 26.
Entry forms and information can be picked up at Emporia Presbyterian Manor, 2300 Industrial Road, Emporia, or by contacting Crystal Stock at 620-343-2613 or cstock@ pmma.org. Or go online to ArtIsAgeless.org to view rules, download an entry form or enter online.
VOLUNTEERS, continued from page 2
Other volunteers at our community: Karen Allen Mar Jean Anderson Don Bailey Nona Berghaus Kevin Burkes Deb Burns-Heinitz Betty Campbell LeRoy Damhoff Margaret Davidson Larry & Linda DeDonder Loie Douglas Barbara Freerkson Breanna Gilger Nina Gragg Pauleen Hancock Myrna Hinz Gene & Jan Huston John Irsik Katherine Martin Lee Muller Jim Pickert John Sanderson Miles Shirk Phyllis Stutzman Robert Symmonds Paul Timmons George Walters Like us on Facebook
Musical entertainment group, the Sunshine Singers, volunteer at many events and birthday parties around our community.
Mission committee members and staff work to complete the luminaries. Right: Bill Wayman enjoying a painting class with Joyce Stolfus.
Bill Wayman Jeremiah Weatherhead Brettany Williams Aubrey Williams Eileen Wright Emporia Presbyterian Manor
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Emporia Presbyterian Manor 2300 Industrial Rd. Emporia, KS 66801-6636 Return Service Requested
ANNIVERSARY, continued from page 1
LEGACY, continued from page 3
Presbyterian home for the aged on April 19. Alice Kalb moved in on April 21, and lived there until her death in 1951.
be just ‘here’s how I want my funeral to proceed.’ We’d all do well if we told more of our stories.”
When it came time to name this new establishment, the committee did not choose to name it the Presbyterian Home for the Aged. Instead, based on the separate suggestions of two women—Mrs. Mary Page of Topeka and Grace Derby of Manhattan, it was named Newton Presbyterian Manor. Grace later lived at Presbyterian Manor in Newton until her death in 1966. Alice’s dream has turned into a network of 17 senior living communities across Kansas and Missouri with more than 2,400 residents, and the mission of the organization remains true to its core: to provide quality senior services guided by Christian values. PMMA has plans to extend its mission into Colorado with the proposed development of Aberdeen Ridge in Colorado Springs.
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Community Matters April 2019
Although people 55+ know they need to get their affairs in order, many haven’t done so. Just 55 percent of the survey respondents age 55 and older have a will. Worse, a mere 18 percent have what Bank of America Merrill Lynch calls the three essential documents for legacy planning: a will, a health care directive (specifying end-of-life preferences and designating someone to make health decisions for you if you can’t) and a durable power of attorney (designating someone to make financial and legacy-related decisions for you if you can’t). Also, added Hindman, “talk to a financial adviser to help set out the steps you need to take. It’s not just having the three documents, it’s also about being sure your financial accounts are titled correctly, your beneficiary designations are up to date and family members can access this information electronically with your passwords.” Like us on Facebook