letter to readers Dear Reader, In Christmas of 2016, in a house filled with relatives, my mother and my aunt were talking and laughing in the living room. I joined them, and my aunt turned to me and asked if I was dating anyone. I was dating someone, someone my mother knew nothing about. He was white. I mustered a lot of courage and answered my aunt’s question honestly. It was a risk. After all, my mother had always been adamant about her children only dating Nigerians. But that day, I wanted to believe her perspective had changed and she had become more flexible. I was wrong. She shot me a hard look, and I cowered, forced out a chuckle, and said I was joking. Another of my aunts, one less traditional, asked why I couldn’t date a white man. That’s when my mother explained her stance. For the first time, I really listened, and I understood where she was coming from. Though she didn’t admit it, I knew she was afraid that I might lose aspects of my culture if I married someone outside my ethnicity. Thankfully, my mother’s perspective has since changed. But back then, I had a lot of questions. While I wasn’t in love with the man I was dating, I wondered what would happen if I fell in love with him. I wondered what would happen if I couldn’t imagine my future without him in it. Then I wondered what would happen if I found myself in an impossible situation and was presented with two choices like Azere in Ties That Tether. What would I do? Would I choose my mother, too afraid to disobey and lose her? Or would I choose the man I love? When I started writing Ties That Tether, I set out to do many things. One was to convey my mother’s fear, which is a fear many immigrants share and a fear that is rational. When immigrants disapprove of their children dating outside their ethnicity, it comes from a place of fear. Culture—created centuries ago, nurtured, and passed from one generation to another—is precious and sacred. And the thought of losing it can be terrifying. I understood this more while writing Ties That Tether, and I wanted my readers to understand it too. Another thing I wanted to do with Ties That Tether, was focus on how hard it can be to break away from family obligations. I wanted to portray this by presenting Azere with a serious choice and then highlighting her struggles and her growth. There are other things I aimed to do with this book—points I wanted to make and themes I wanted to explore. I hope you’ll be able to spot them as you read. Thank you so much for picking Ties That Tether for your book club. I am so thrilled and grateful. This story is incredibly dear to my heart, and I hope that you enjoy it. Many thanks, Jane
recipes jollof rice Jollof rice is a major staple food in Nigeria. You can’t have a party without jollof rice. It just isn’t heard of. Enjoy!
Ingredients 5 Roma tomatoes 1 red bell pepper 2 habanero peppers (depending on how spicy you want it) 1 cup of vegetable oil 1 medium onion, diced 3 tbsp tomato paste 2½ cups of chicken stock 2 cups of parboiled rice, rinsed 1 tsp salt to taste 1 tsp curry powder 1 tsp thyme 1 tsp all-purpose seasoning 1 Knorr chicken stock cube 2 bay leaves 2 tbsp of unsalted butter Water, as needed
Instructions 1. Blend the tomatoes, bell pepper, and habanero peppers until smooth. 2. In a medium sized pot, heat oil on medium heat then add the diced onions. Once the onions have turned golden brown, add the tomato paste and fry for 2-3 minutes. Then add the blended tomato mixture and cook for 30 minutes. Stir consistently to prevent burning. 3. Add the chicken stock and seasonings (salt, curry powder, thyme, all-purpose seasoning, and the Knorr cube). Cook for 10 minutes. 4. Add the rice to the pot. Mix it with the tomato stew. Add the bay leaves, cover the pot, and cook on medium to low heat. Stir consistently to prevent burning. 5. When the liquid has been absorbed, add the butter and stir thoroughly. Turn off the heat and your jollof rice is ready!
fried plantains Fried plantains—or dodo as Nigerians call it—is the perfect side dish. It’s delicious and very easy to make.
Instructions
Ingredients 2 ripe plantains (or as many as you would like) 1 cup of vegetable oil Salt (optional)
1. Peel off the backs of the plantains then cut the plantains diagonally or round, into 1/4-inchthick slices 2. Sprinkle the sliced plantains with a of pinch of salt (you can skip this step if you don’t want the salt). 3. Heat the oil in a skillet then add the sliced plantains in batches.
Enjoy with some rice or whatever you’re in the mood for!
4. Flips the plantains so both sides get a chance to brown. 5. Remove the plantains from the skillet and set on a bowl lined with paper towels.
puff puff One of my favorite Nigerian desserts (or small chops, as we call it) is puff puff. It’s round, fluffy, and sweet.
Ingredients Lukewarm water 1/4 cup of sugar plus 1 tsp of sugar for proofing the yeast 2 tsp of yeast 2 cups of flour 1 tsp of nutmeg 1/2 tsp of salt 3 to 4 cups of canola oil or other neutral oil (enough for deep frying)
You can sprinkle some powdered sugar on it and eat it by itself or with ice cream!
Instructions 1. Mix half a cup of water, 1 teaspoon of sugar, and the yeast in a bowl. Cover with a lid and set aside for 4-6 minutes. 2. In another bowl, mix the dry ingredients— flour, sugar, nutmeg, and salt. 3. Combine the proofed yeast and one cup of water together with the dry ingredients and mix until the batter is lump-free. 4. Cover the dough and allow it to rise for 1 hour. 5. Preheat the oil in a deep skillet to about 360°F and with a spoon, scoop a bit of dough (about the size of a golf ball) and drop it in the oil. 6. Fry both sides until golden brown (5 to 6 minutes per batch). 7. Remove the puff puff from the oil and place on a rack or paper towels to drain.
playlist Songs Mentioned in the Book & Songs I Listened to While Writing
“Ayo” by Simi “By You” by Simi “Rewrite the Stars” by Zac Efron & Zendaya “My Darlin’” by Tiwa Savage “Made For You” by Banky W “Only Love Can Hurt Like This” by Paloma Faith “In Good Trouble” by India Arie “I Choose You” by Kiana Ledé “Listen” by Beyoncé “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston
recommendations Books Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Queenie by Candice Carty-Williams The Secret Lives of the Four Wives by Lola Shoneyin
Movies (All available on Netflix) Isoken The Wedding Party The Wedding Party 2
nigerian lingo dictionary You’ll spot some of these words and phrases while reading. Each example is brought to you by the interesting and often bizarre real-life conversations between my mother and my aunties.
Abi
Shakara
This can mean “right?” or “is it true?” It’s used to confirm information. Example: So, Kola squandered all his money in the city and is returning to the village a pauper. Abi?
This means someone who is showing off or acting like they’re the hottest thing around. Example: Unless you’re looking for trouble, don’t date that girl o. She can shakara.
Dundee
Wonders Shall Never End
This means idiot. Example: If you want to secure your destiny as well as your sanity, don’t marry that man o. He is a very big dundee.
This means strange and usual things will never stop happening. It’s one of my favorite phrases. Example: So, you’re telling me that the pastor left his wife for the choir mistress. Nawa o. Wonders shall never end.
Enemy of progress This means someone who is against another person’s advancement or success. Example: Can you imagine that useless woman doesn’t want me to marry her son? She’s an enemy of progress. But God will put her to shame.
Wahala
Nawa
Yansh
This is used to express surprise. If something outrageous has just blown your mind, this is the only word you need to express yourself. Example: So, you’re telling me that Michael has two wives—one in Nigeria and another in Canada. And neither one know about each other. Nawa o!
Now, everyone has a butt. But not everyone has a yansh, which means a big butt—the kind that can turn heads. In Nigeria, everyone strives for a yansh. Example: That woman’s yansh is big o. In fact, it has two personalities—one for each cheek.
O
Yeye
This one letter means nothing and everything, at the same time. Just put it at the end of any sentence, and instantly, that sentence has a flavor that is distinctly Nigerian. Example: These children have been screaming and disturbing my life all day. They won’t kill me o.
This means useless or senseless. Example: She told me my order will arrive last week and it still hasn’t. What kind of yeye business is she running?
This means trouble. Example: I’ve told that man I’m not interested, but he won’t leave me alone o. What kind of wahala is this?
© Borada Photography 2020
about the author Jane Abieyuwa Igharo was born in Nigeria and immigrated to Canada at the age of twelve. She has a journalism degree from the University of Toronto and works as a communications specialist in Ontario, Canada. When she isn’t writing, she’s watching “Homecoming” for the hundredth time and trying to match Beyoncé’s vocals to no avail. JaneIgharo.com •
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