On Cultural Ignorance, Grace and Humility by Richard Twiss A beautiful sunny weekend retreat at the coast with a bunch of dudes was lookin' good. Walking down the sidewalk looking for my room, I heard a man say, "Hey, Chief, how are you doing?" Inside I thought, Wow, then said, "Bro, don't call me Chief." "Okay, Chief." Later that day the man again said, "How's it going, Chief?" A little perturbed, I said, "Please don't call me that. If you keep calling me Chief, I'm gonna have to start calling you Honkie White Man." The next morning the man said, "Good morning, Chief." This time I stopped him as the church service was about to begin and said, "OK, we gotta talk. It is offensive when you call me Chief." I graciously explained that calling a native guy Chief is a derogatory term. (Same as referring to a Native woman as "squaw"). In my culture a more appropriate term would be ikce wicasa, "a common human person." "A common human person" is something that leaders aspire to be—one of the people. The man said, "Wow, I didn't realize that. I was calling you Chief in a complementary and respectful way, because I recognize you as a true leader. Please forgive me, because it was not in my heart nor my intention to in any way be offensive." I was glad our little exchange didn't turn into a big deal. He was honest and when presented with his mistake, he changed. I said, "One more thing. When we shake hands in our native cultures, we don't try to crush the other person's hand as a sign of masculinity, confidence or strength. Every time you shook and smashed my hand you dislocated my finger, popping it sideways out of joint. Through years of playing basketball my little finger was dislocated so many times the ligaments are all weak and stretched out." The man said, "I didn't realize that. I am sorry." I forgave him and we parted well. Our cultural ignorance does not justify our wrong behavior, though it does explain it. It will, however, become problematic if we continue once we've been made aware of our mistake. The unity we long for can only be realized in the midst of diversity, so grace and humility are needed if we are to succeed in finding the common good for all people. As we enter this new year, may we find Creator's grace to be the best mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, daughters, sons, uncles, aunts and grandparents that we can possibly be in the spirit of Jesus for the blessing of all. Richard Twiss, Sicangu Lakota, is president of Wiconi International, a ministry that provides education, encouragement and offer practical support to Native American families and communities.
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