the insider
A grumpy old man writes…
L
be careful here as this carries all the hallmarks ET’S START WITH LONDON. IT wasn’t that long ago that I would associated with organised crime. Either county fight anyone who argued against lines drug smuggling or child prostitution, or both, my insistence that our capital is so I am not giving too many specifics. the greatest city in the world. Briefly, a business woman has had her personal Recently, however, I constantly find my head details hacked. The hackers contact companies shaking in disbelief at the state of the place. Never and use the stolen details to book vehicles on mind Boris’s enquiry into breaking the rules he account. The jobs that have gone out, and there himself set - it is the custodians of this onceare hundreds of them, follow a similar pattern. The Kevin Willis great metropolis that are in need of a thorough ‘customer’ never comes out of the pick-up address investigation. but appears from around the corner or out of a As soon as Sue Gray’s enquiry has condemned Everyday problems waiting vehicle. Bojo, the immediate task should be for her to Much the same happens at the drop off with from the operator’s look for any links City Hall has with block paving children often accompanying the adults(s) on point of view... companies because everywhere we turn is now the journey. Whether this gang are drug dealers a one-way street or pedestrianised zone. 20mph or pimps is conjecture but what is certain is that speed limits! Are you kidding me? they, to date, have never settled any account with many stories Unless passing a school during term time there is absolutely of chauffeurs being owed several thousands of pounds. no reason for us to be driving at such a low speed. It causes If you should receive contact from anyone looking to book a other road users to overtake when they shouldn’t and makes us lot of journeys out of the blue then I would suggest an abrupt all look like curb crawlers as cyclists and electric scooters zoom ‘lack of availability at the moment’ response or apply a high past at 40mph. degree of due diligence before proceeding. My son says I sound like a crusty old man with my mutterings Another thing that changed recently was when my licensing about ‘back in the day’ and he might have a point. But things authority, Medway, merged with Gravesham Council. All of a aren’t the same anymore. Gone are the cheap and cheerful sudden I found myself forced to attend Zoom training courses eateries like The Stockpot or Guido’s in Shepherds Market. on disability and customer awareness. Then, once my initial Where we grabbed breakfast while waiting for the Hand anger had subsided, I was struck by how useful the programme Car wash to open. We have been abandoned to the mercy of actually was and how much it resonated with the scam story. As drivers, we are given up close and personal time with our overpriced Starbucks’ coffee and a Pret-a-Manger menu of clients, so have a responsibility to look out for any red flags brioche bun and porridge. being waved when it comes to helping victims of abuse. We Birmingham doesn’t fare much better. What a khazi the town should be asking ourselves ‘Is that drunk girl safe with the man planners have made of the second City. A place were Waze spins taking her home?’ or ‘Why is that child so withdrawn?’ into a vortex of confusion before demanding a week off work We do not have to be detectives or act as superheroes, so to care for its mental well-being. ‘Drive to Martineau Square, please, please, do not attempt any intervention alone. Simply be Birmingham’ is a new game show I am devising. To be hosted by vigilant, just as one taxi driver did when becoming suspicious Noddy Holder and Bear Grylls (all rights reserved). that his punter, a confused, elderly lady, had told him how she Worse than that, we are being taken for fools – and as I get was heading to her bank in order to withdraw a large amount of older, I get less tolerant of that. Do you know what Hollywood money. Movie executives call British drivers? ‘White Mexicans’. The The driver called his suspicions into his office who, in turn, slur stems from the fact that unit drivers’ pay in the UK is contacted her bank and then the police. The driver’s smart exactly half of that of our American counterparts. And unit intervention saved the old girl her life savings. drivers in the US get supplied a vehicle when us Brits Finally, hopefully, business looks to be heading toward a cheerfully bring our own. bumper year as we finally learn to live with, and not hide from, I heard a story of one American movie exec who turned up on a British set and was furious to see a car park full of V-Class and Covid-19. People will travel freely again soon and events will S-Class Mercedes. “I’m not paying for these expensive vehicles!” happen so please, be alert, be safe and get busy making some proper money. Try not to be as cynical and grumpy as I am and he yelled. He was informed that the drivers supply their own should you want to join me down at Benito’s Hat for a few Tacos cars and it’s included in the half-priced deal. According to his then you are more than welcome. driver, he chuckled all the way home. Another story that crossed my path by way of an old mate is a far more serious tale. Chauffeurs, both sole traders and n Kevin Willis runs Chirton Grange, companies, are falling victim to a major scam. Now, I have to contact@chirtongrange.co.ukw
FEBRUARY 2022
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