February 14, 2019
inform | inspire
Coming Out Non-Binary
Truth Behind the Instafeed
A-Town
BROWN
LGBTQs work the neutral staple into a winter statement
TFW When Trans Need Not Apply Georgia’s First Gay Congressman
Valentine Agenda Q Shots 10 Queer Things The Weekly Print Publication of Project Q Atlanta
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EDITOR’S NOTE Q Q MAGAZINE THE WEEKLY PUBLICATION OF PROJECT Q ATLANTA PUBLISHERS INITIAL MEDIA, LLC MIKE FLEMING PUBLISHER & EDITOR MIKE@THEQATL.COM MATT HENNIE PUBLISHER & BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT MATT@THEQATL.COM RICHARD CHERSKOV PUBLISHER & GENERAL MANAGER RICHARD@THEQATL.COM
Balancing ACT
The queer see-saw, from the color of our clothes to the color of our skin
THE EXTENT TO WHICH INTERSECTIONALITY MATTERS — in the fight for equality, in LGBTQ Atlanta at large and in our personal circles — remains front and center every day as each of us tries to find balance between community understanding and individual concerns. Coverage in this week’s issue converges at the intersection of race, sexual orientation and gender identity as we do our own part steadying that queer see-saw. We find diverse Atlantans doing their thing, simultaneously bringing all their uniqueness to bare, to create a rich, balanced LGBTQ landscape.
ADVERTISING SALES RUSS YOUNGBLOOD SENIOR SALES REPRESENTATIVE RUSS@THEQATL.COM ART DIRECTOR JOHN NAIL JOHN@THEQATL.COM PROJECT Q ATLANTA PATRICK SAUNDERS EDITOR PSAUNDERS@THEQATL.COM CONTRIBUTORS IAN ABER LAURA BACCUS GABRIELLE CLAIBORNE BUCK COOKE CHARLES E. DAVIS JON DEAN BILL DICKINSON JIM FARMER BRAD GIBSON JAMES L. HICKS TAMEEKA L. HUNTER HEATHER MALONEY ERIC PAULK KYLE ROSE JAMES PARKER SHEFFIELD VINCE SHIFFLETT ALEXANDRA TYLER VAVA VROOM NATIONAL ADVERTISING RIVENDELL MEDIA SALES@RIVENDELLMEDIA.COM 212-242-6863 LOCAL ADVERTISING SALES@THEQATL.COM 404-949-7071
First-time author Timothy Keys launches his memoir this week, in part to express his perspective on the lives of black gay men in the Deep South. We interview him in Q Books. MIKE FLEMING EDITOR & PUBLISHER
Meanwhile, Q Stage admires Porcelain, the newest play at Out Front Theatre. The show explores what happens when a fragile, isolated man of Chinese descent meets his breaking point being objectified by white guys in restroom hookups. Our transgender and nonbinary siblings get the 10 Queer Things spotlight this week as they list the 10 best things about coming out as their authentic selves. Their comments ring true for all of us who’ve struggled with identity, and offer encouragement to those who might still be grappling. Two more queers are riding the struggle bus in The Q advice column. It’s hard for them to see others succeeding while they’re still stagnant in realizing their dreams. One older person worries they’ve aged out of their chance, while a younger one worries that they’re already too late. It’s a lot, but don’t worry, part of the balance in this issue comes as we weigh struggles against some stress-relieving frivolity. The Queer Agenda calendar of events offers ample opportunity to blow off steam, scores of folks smile for our cameras in the Q Shots photo galleries and the models in Q Fashion punch up their gray winter wardrobes with the not-so-new neutral, brown. Dig in, look for daily updates to our content online at Project Q Atlanta, and let me know if you’d like to contribute, either with an idea or your creative talents. Reach me via the contact form on our site or via mike@theQatl.com theQatl.com
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INSIDE THIS ISSUE VOLUME 2 ISSUE 13 FEBRUARY 14, 2019
FREEDOM 2019
Coming out trans and non-binary
COVER
23 10
Color Story Brown warms up winter looks
NEWS
13 14
Considering Congress
29 Party On
Mr. Park goes to Washington? BOOKS
16
True Story
34 Big Game
Atlanta memoir, ‘I Don’t Want to Be That!’
FEATURES Q Voices
8
Q News
13
Q Shots
29
Queer Agenda The Q
19 38
38
36 Cook Off theQatl.com
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Q
VOICES
Trans Need Not
APPLY
The real people affected by the military ban on trans troops
IN JULY OF 2017, DONALD TRUMP ANNOUNCED PLANS to ban transgender troops from military service. As all great leaders do, he made this declaration via Twitter on a random Wednesday morning for no apparent reason. The very presidential three-part tweet went like this:
a survey. Estimates of actively trrans enlisted troops range widely from 2,100 to 15,000. Opportunities Matter Patriotism plays a part in why recruits enlist, but the overwhelming reason anyone joins the military is for economic opportunity. The ability to get a free college education, learn trade skills and gain access to home financing are all attractive offerings, particularly for those with less generational wealth and/or job prospects. Trans people are more likely than our cisgender peers to have prolonged and severe financial struggles. According to a 2015 survey, 1 in 3 trans Americans lives in poverty. The military offers an ability to secure the very basics: stable housing, food, education and health care. Some sources even contend that the military is the largest employer of trans people in the world.
Trans Health Care Expenses For the record, trans health care is also known After consultation with my Generals and milas simply “health care.” If we choose to engage itary experts, please be advised that the United in transition-related care, it’s primarily managed States Government will not accept or allow...... during our annual exam. With the exception of ....transgender individuals to serve in any caa couple of extra blood panels, it’s basically the pacity in the U.S. Military. Our military must same. As a trans man, my prescription doesn’t be focused on decisive and overwhelming..... look much different than the ones the guys in the “low T” commercials have. Trans women ....victory and cannot be burdened with the have similar prescriptions to what my mother tremendous medical costs and disruption that J A M E S P A R K E R was given for early-onset menopause. transgender in the military would entail. SHEFFIELD Thank you Even if we contemplate surgeries, the average cost of transition-related care for a trans troop is $40,000 over In Trumpland, this thread is what they call “a real banger.” a lifetime. Meanwhile back at the ranch, the current cost of inIn truth, Trump’s “Generals and military experts” had not asked sulin can be upwards of $10,000 a year and no one is suggesthim to ban trans troops, nor did they know he was considering ing diabetes as a disqualifier for enlistment. it. As news broke that it was a serious initiative, stories of active duty trans troops fearing for their futures surfaced: Trump Safety & Readiness wasn’t just eliminating opportunities for new recruits, he was We know the Trump administration’s claim that trans troops pursuing the removal of individuals already enlisted. have a negative impact on safety and readiness is a lie for a Commanders of these troops expressed confusion about the need for policy change, demonstrations took place around the country, and advocates launched media campaigns to combat misinformation about trans military personnel.
After more than a year of court filings, the Supreme Court ruled to allow the ban on trans troops while the lower courts move through pending litigation. Simply put, the ban on trans troops is in place, until a court rules that it isn’t. The Numbers Counting those affected is difficult. Accurate numbers require people disclosing identity, and there are a variety of reasons some people don’t risk that. There’s no way to know how many young trans people were actively considering enlistment prior to the ban, and we have to rely on whether or not someone currently serving felt comfortable disclosing information on 8
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pretty strong reason: Trans troops already exist in the ranks. If they were creating problems, those stories would be plastered from sea to mother-effing shining sea.
In fact, denying trans troops the right to serve may actually threaten readiness. Seventy-one percent of Americans in the target age demographic for recruitment are ineligible for service, which already shrinks the pool of possible enlistees to a precarious level. The Army has been so far off their enlistment goal, they will spend 700-million cold-ass American dollars on marketing in 2019. When an entire group of people is banned from any area of public life based on immutable characteristics, everyone suffers. The trans ban is anti-civil liberties and anti-military. No one wins. James Sheff ield is an LGBTQ health advocate and trans man living in Atlanta.
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10 QUEER THINGS
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Free to BE Transgender and nonbinary folks share the best things about coming out trans YOUR OWN STANDARDS “At some level you stop caring what greater society thinks, and it’s such a freeing feeling.” — Lynn WORDS MATTER “After a lifetime of questioning, finally gaining the words to articulate who and what I am without hesitation or self-loathing.” — Colin FRESH AIR “I feel like a person who always had one lung and got a second one and felt what it was like to breathe for the first time.” — Michelle BELONGING “Once out, other people appear who are out too, and you find community, and you realize that you never felt you belonged anywhere until now. You’re not alone.” — Terri GENDER POSITIVE “Some of the ‘woker’ precincts of social media try to push the idea that gender should be dismantled, canceled, transcended, and that it’s ethically incumbent on you as a queer person to make it happen. Ignore this. It’s dumb. It’s OK to want gender, to identify along the spectrum or outside the spectrum of the construct.” — Andrea
PEACE “The best part about finally being able to live authentically is the sense of inner peace, and the fact that my relationships with people feel more genuine.” — Jamie Elizabeth SUPERPOWERS “I like to view being transgender as a superpower, and I can wield it like any other individual characteristic like being smart or bubbly or thoughtful.” — Heather YOU BE YOU “It was much the same way of accepting myself as queer: I no longer had to spend so much time and energy working on being someone who I wasn't and would never be.” — Jared PRIDE “I spent so much time worrying. Now every day I try to make my younger, closeted self proud, and it’s the most satisfying, actualized thing in the world to tell him he did it, he made it.” — Conner RECLAIMING POWER “The moment you come out, nobody can harm you with your identity. They can’t hurt you by telling you what you just told them. Being trans isn’t a bad thing anymore.” — Clee theQatl.com
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NEWS Q
Trump’s
RADAR
Plan and promise to eliminate HIV/AIDS targets Atlanta By Patrick Saunders
FOUR METRO ATLANTA COUNTIES ARE BEING TARGETED as part of President Donald Trump’s plan to end HIV/AIDS in the next 10 years. But some local HIV/AIDS activists reacted with skepticism. Trump made the pledge in his State of the Union address on Feb. 5. “My budget will ask Democrats and Republicans to make the needed commitment to eliminate the HIV epidemic in the United States within 10 years,” he said. “We have made incredible strides. Incredible.” “Together, we will defeat AIDS in America. And beyond,” he added. The goal of Trump’s plan is to reduce new HIV infections nationwide by 75 percent in five years and by at least 90 percent in 10 years, according to public health officials who briefed reporters on a call on Wednesday. The plan involves targeting seven states and an additional 48 counties with the highest rates of new infections. Cobb, DeKalb, Fulton and Gwinnett are the Georgia counties included on that list. Robert Redfield, director of the Atlanta-based Centers for Disease Control & Prevention, called it a “laser-focused program.” Redfield said the CDC will create local “HIV elimination teams” in the targeted areas, “putting boots on the ground to help make sure this key progress is made.” “We will listen to people living with HIV, and to public health partners in the most-affected communities, so we reach those in greatest need,” he added. Admiral Brett Giroir, assistant secretary of health at the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, noted that young gay and bisexual men of color, transgender women and people living in the South are hardest hit by the epidemic. “We are now seeing about 40,000 new infections throughout the United States every year,” he said.
Most of the seven states Trump’s plan will target are in the South: Alabama, Arkansas, Kentucky, Mississippi, Missouri, Oklahoma and South Carolina. The 48 counties span an additional 19 states, including Georgia, California, Florida, New York, Tennessee and Texas. The plan also includes Washington, D.C. and Puerto Rico. OFFICIALS REFUSE TO RELEASE BUDGET NUMBERS Trump’s record on HIV/AIDS in his two years in office has alarmed activists, leading to their skepticism about his new plan. He’s made repeated attempts to cut funding to fight HIV/AIDS, and his efforts to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act put people living with HIV at risk. Longtime Atlanta HIV/AIDS activist Craig Washington called Trump’s comments on the issue in the State of the Union address “smoke and mirrors,” according to the AJC. State Rep. Park Cannon, who has made fighting HIV/ AIDS one of her main issues, said she was “heartened” to hear about Trump’s plan. “Since the unexpected dissolution of President Obama’s Advisory Committee on HIV, various affected communities have watched Rep. Park Cannon with concern as states and cities like New York have come to take the lead on the provision of housing, wraparound services, testing and self-funding this fight,” she told Project Q. “In Atlanta, we are committed to serving and supporting families touched by HIV/AIDS and associated issues.” “Now that we are in the 50th year since the riots at Stonewall, the LGBTQ+ community will not be removed from this conversation by anyone,” she added. Several activists called for increases in funding for treatment and prevention, especially as it relates to paying for PrEP, a course of drugs taken by HIV-negative people to reduce the risk of infection. Public health officials on Wednesday’s press call wouldn’t specify how much of a budget increase the plan will require. Michael Weinstein, president of AID Atlanta-parent AIDS Healthcare Foundation, praised Trump’s plan. “We applaud President Trump’s commitment to fight HIV/ AIDS and eliminate the HIV epidemic in the U.S. by the end of this decade,” he said in a press release. “As the largest HIV/ AIDS organization in the world, AHF stands ready to partner in this daunting effort.” theQatl.com
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Q
IN BRIEF
Gay metro Atlanta lawmaker considers run for U.S. House By Patrick Saunders THE FIRST OPENLY GAY MAN ELECTED TO THE Georgia legislature will wait until the legislative session is over to decide if he wants to try being the first openly gay member of Congress from the state. State Rep. Sam Park’s name popped up on a list of people interested in running for the 7th Congressional District seat following U.S. Rep. Rob Woodall’s announcement on Feb. 7 that he will not seek re-election in 2020. Park, a Democrat, represents House District 101 in Lawrenceville. “Sure, there’s interest,” Park told Project Q Atlanta. “But of course, I’m focused on the legislative session. That’s the plan at least until April 2. That’s where my sole attention and focus will be, and we’ll see what happens.” When asked what issues he would like to see tackled by the eventual Democratic nominee for the Gwinnett and Forsyth-based 7th District seat, Park pivoted to a statewide focus on voting rights. “For me with representing my district in House District 101, my focus is on the issues of the state of Georgia,” he said. “One would be that we improve our election system, that we have voting machines that would restore trust to our democratic process and that we have fair and free elections. That’s
State Rep. Sam Park
whether I’m running for a higher seat or not.” The upcoming race is expected to be a crowded one on both the Democratic and Republican sides. Georgia State University professor Carolyn Bourdeaux came within 400 votes of beating Woodall last fall. She announced she’s making another run at the seat within minutes of Woodall’s announcement. Snellville attorney Marqus Cole has already announced his candidacy, and state Rep. Brenda Lopez is said to be interested as well, according to the AJC. Park entered his second term representing House District 101 in January. He became the first openly gay man elected to the Georgia House in 2016. He is also the first Asian-American man elected to the House.
Pastor shames Atlanta Pride, preaches for death to gays THE PASTOR OF A NORCROSS church preaches that gay people should get the death penalty and that using the correct pronouns for transgender people is “disgusting” and “perverted.” A WSB-TV viewer tipped the station off about Strong Hold Baptist Church after seeing one of Pastor David Berzins’ sermons on YouTube titled “Shame on Atlanta Pride and its Supporters.”
and other Pride parade participants “to be named and shamed.”
Strong Hold Baptist Church operates in a Gwinnett County-owned building in a strip mall near Jimmy Carter Boulevard, according to WSB-TV.
David Berzins
Berzins called the parade “the sodomite Pride parade” in the video posted days after the 2018 Atlanta Pride celebration.
“There are a bunch of pedophiles, perverts, rebrobate, wicked, vile people walking, marching up and down the streets of Atlanta with their fag flags out and just out and proud in your face,” Berzins said. He then read off a list of businesses, politicians, churches 14
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Berzins moved from Arizona to Atlanta last June because he “saw a great need for a new church plant in the Atlanta area,” according to the church’s website. Berzins defended his beliefs to WSB-TV. “No one is going to prevent me from preaching the word unless they kill me,” he said. WSB-TV also interviewed Sean Young, the out legal director of the ACLU of Georgia. Young said Berzins’ comments are protected speech. Project Q Atlanta posts fresh local news of LGBTQ interest every day at theQatl.com.
Q
BOOKS
His TRUTH
Atlanta author Timothy Keys debuts ‘I Don’t Want to be That’
T
By Patrick Saunders imothy Keys is out with his debut book I Don't Want To Be That! — an autobiographical look into the world of a black gay man in the South. In preparation for one of his roll-out events scheduled for My Sister’s Room next week, Keys talks with Q about his motivations for writing the book, what he learned about himself, and who he would pick to play him in a movie adaptation. What motivated you to write I Don’t Want To Be That? I am good friends with Shunda Brown, author of Do Something New, and New York Times bestselling author JL King. Both of them were an inspiration. JL kept announcing his publication reassignment. That's when my wheels began to turn. I mentioned to my mother the idea of me writing a book, and the excitement in her voice was enough to get me started. I began to bounce this crazy idea around to friends and coworkers whom all shared the same response: “Start writing!” So I did. Writing a memoir can be eye-opening. What did you learn in the process? This journey really taught me that after 37 years of living, the saying is true: “You can do anything you put your mind to.” I learned that writing came naturally to me and is a form of therapy. It opened my eyes to the strong man inside of me, the one I don't see just by looking in the mirror. The making of this memoir also revealed I have positioned myself around exactly who I am supposed to be surrounded by at this phase in my life. We hear you have plans to turn the book into a stage play? That plan is on the backburner. My team and I decided the book I Don't Want To Be That! should be the primary focus for at least a year. We are currently working on branding the book and myself as the author, planning book signings throughout the city of Atlanta and hope to kick off a book tour in March in my hometown of Baton Rouge, La. Stay tuned!
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Timothy Keys reads from and signs “I Don't Want To Be That!” on Wednesday, Feb. 20 at My Sister’s Room, 7 p.m. If you could pick the actor to play you in a movie version of the book, who would it be? Mmm...not because he is handsome, or because I have a crush on him and would love to work with him. Not even the fact that we met after one of his concerts and he is very funny and down to earth. I would have to choose Jussie Smollett, the singer and actor from Empire. He is a proud, out man of color, and I am sure he, as well as many, can and will relate to something in my book. What advice would you give other first-time authors? Start writing! Keep a paper and pen with you at all times. When a thought, memory or idea pops into that little head of yours, write it down. Revisit it later, and you will witness the story come to life before your eyes. Don’t give up! Assure you have a support system and accountability buddies that believe in you and your vision. Once you have a well-written manuscript, don't be cheap with the book cover or your editor. If I can do it, you can also — remember, your story isn't for you.
Photo by Russ Youngblood theQatl.com
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Q
THE QUEER AGENDA
Leather & Lace The annual dichotomy of fabrics for rubbing against each other features a cast of entertainers before opening the dance floor to DJ Daniel Weaver @ Atlanta Eagle, 8 p.m. atlantaeagle.com
The Best Queer Things To Do in Atlanta This Week
February 14 — February 20 THURSDAY, FEB. 14 Amen The Valentine edition of Taylor Alxndr’s drag show is also the head queen’s birthday extravaganza @ Sister’s Louisa’s Church, 10:30 p.m. sisterlouisaschurch.com
Trevor Noah
The liberal bastion and bonafide cutie-pie brings his brand of laughs to the stage on his Loud & Clear tour @ Fox Theatre, 8 p.m. foxtheatre.org
3LC Valentine Shindig
LGBTQ-ATL country bar 3-Legged Cow-
boy isn’t dead. It lives on in the hearts of these boot scooters @ Heretic, 8 p.m. hereticatlanta.com
Porcelain The currently running production from Atlanta’s exclusively queer troop trods the boards @ Out Front Theatre, 8 p.m. Performances Friday through Monday too. Read our preview in this issue. outfronttheatre.com
FRIDAY, FEB. 15 It’s Complicated HRC Atlanta presents Ballads and Breakups Wine Tasting for Equality @ VinoTeca, 8 p.m. hrcatlanta.com The G8Yties
Dance to and with the oldies @ Heretic, 10 p.m. hereticatlanta.com
Horse Meat Disco The international dance party that leaves nothing to the imagination returns courtesy of the Deep South crew @ Heretic, 10 p.m. hereticatlanta.com Cross the parking lot for the DJ Cindel Afterparty @ Xion, 3 a.m.
SUNDAY, FEB. 17 Love on the Rocks
Joining Hearts throws its first party of 2019 with a new vibe this year @ Wimbish House, 5 p.m. joininghearts.org
Love Trumps Hate
GA Boy Productions brings DJ Joe Geauthreaux to rock you into the
morning of President’s Day @ District Atlanta, 7 p.m. future-atlanta.com
TUESDAY, FEB. 19 Navigating Transgender Legal Issues
Trans Lambda Legal attorney Taylor Brown discusses matters including
name changes and gender affirming documentation @ John’s Creek UMC,
Nonsense: GLOW
7 p.m. pflagjohnscreek.org
DJ Kimber and her gay entourage turn off the lights and crank up the
Vagina Monologues
neon @ The Basement, 11 p.m. basementatl.com
Three benefit productions of this classic play in-
clude queer director Kirstin Popper as well as trans
FRIDAY, FEB. 16
columnist and Q contributor Heather Maloney
Drag Queen Storytime
(photo) in the cast @ Out Front Theatre, 8 p.m. out-
The Valentine’s edition of Terracotta
fronttheatre.org Performances also on Wednesday and
Sugarbaker reading to kids for the enjoy-
ment of adults @ Ponce Branch Library,
3 p.m. aflps.org/ponce-branch6
Sunday, with additional material at the Sunday show.
Find even more LGBTQ events in the Queer Agenda each Thursday at theQatl.com.
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Beats by DJ MIKE POPE Cocktails by
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COVER Q
What Can
BROWN Do For You?
Fashion’s ‘also ran’ can be winter’s signature color By Mike Fleming
T
here’s an old drag saying, “If it’s brown, put it down.” Forget what you heard.
In a season of gray and black, Q models turn natural and neutral into rich and radiant. From patterns to plaid, accent pieces to head-to-toe looks, these queers are down with brown.
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Q
FASHION, Continued
So-Thrift-i-Cated
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Q
FASHION, Continued
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All You
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Q
FASHION, Continued
#moodaf
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HATEISWRONG SUPER BOWL INCLUSION PARTY
Full gallery on Project Q at theQatl.com
Q SHOTS Q
PHOTOS BY RUSS YOUNGBLOOD theQatl.com
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Q
Q SHOTS
THE BIG GAME AT WOOFS
Full gallery on Project Q at theQatl.com
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PHOTOS BY RUSS YOUNGBLOOD
Q
Q SHOTS
SUPER SUNDAY FUNDAY AT TEN
Full gallery on Project Q at theQatl.com
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PHOTOS BY RUSS YOUNGBLOOD
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Q
Q SHOTS
NFFLA SUPER BOWL PARTY AT BLAKE’S
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PHOTOS BY RUSS YOUNGBLOOD
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Q
Q SHOTS
15TH ANNUAL CHILI COOKOFF AT FRIENDS
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PHOTOS BY RUSS YOUNGBLOOD
Q
THEQ?! Time
BANDITS
Dreaming big, working hard and falling short of your arbitrary age deadline
Q
I’m rapidly approaching the age of no gay return, 40. Apparently, while I was busy
having fun and dreaming of becoming famous and fabulous, younger people are experiencing the success that
still eludes me. They got that record
deal. They got that relationship. They
got the job that pays them to do what they love.
Beyond my cat and my paycheck-to-paycheck job, I got squat. I do work on my creative
career in my off hours, and I love those hours more than I can say, but the rewards are zero. Is it too late for me to land my dreams? Dear Senior Citizen: Get hold of yourself. Time is an illusion, and age is relative. The day is coming when you think 40 was
young and you wasted it worrying about getting old. All any of us has is today, our dreams and the efforts we invest in them.
The world, not just but especially queer culture, loves a fresh
young talent who fell into overnight success. But that’s a story with
a dramatic ending and no context. The truth lies behind the curated Instagram feeds, and your own satisfaction lies well beyond 40.
The 20- and 30-somethings you envy likely worked harder than meets the eye to attain their success, and if they truly fell into it
without trying, they are just as likely to fall out of it. For every one
of them, there is someone who put in the hours and years, who kept trying and crying, falling and getting up again. 38
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People’s chances come in all shapes and sizes and at any time. They happen at age 19, 36, 42, 68 and 83. Those folks you’re coveting didn’t steal “your” chance; they grabbed theirs. Your success isn’t hidden somewhere within theirs. While your eyes are on doing the work and seizing your own opportunities, it might help you to redefine success. Base your measuring stick on your own life, not someone else’s. Base it on forces within your control — you practiced today, you made something that didn’t suck, you had a great idea, you perfected a new technique, you contacted someone about a step toward progress. It’s about progress, not perfection, and there are plenty of rewards along the way if you look. Make a mental, or actual, list of things that have improved since you were, say, 20. Be grateful for the years. You’ve learned a lot. Revel in the time you spend on your dreams. There is no age limit to success, but there are limits in our thinking. Glory and riches aren’t guaranteed even if you put in the work, but they definitely won’t come if you give up, and you might find gold along the rainbow rather than at the end.
Q
I’m 25, and my friends queer and straight are settling down into post-worthy family units and
careers. I’m still just dating, slinging coffee, taking classes and trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. When am I going to get it together? Dear Greenhorn: It’s hard to see the forest for the trees, but you are already getting it together — on your timeline. You’re holding down a job, going to school and keeping your heart open to relationships. Progression is a process. It’s futile to envy other people’s success and measure your life with their ruler or their clock. Social media can make it even harder, because people only show a Hollywood movie version of their lives. Don’t compare their highlight reel to your behind-the-scenes footage. The Q is for entertainment purposes and not professional counseling. Send your burning Qs to mike@theqatl.com.
ILLUSTRATION BY BRAD GIBSON
FA BU L OUS F E BRUA RY
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