Food persuaders Another challenge you may experience can be other people trying to persuade you to eat things that can take you off your healthy eating plan. For example, a friend or colleague might try to persuade you to eat some cake you hadn’t planned on eating. If other people’s requests for you to eat unplanned food are disrupting your goals it’s worth thinking why this may be happening. Ask yourself if their desire for you to eat their food is more important than your desire to lose weight? How bad is their disappointment likely to be? Your weight loss goals are important. Would you find it hard to refuse for religious, medical or ethical reasons? Probably not, so why do we find it hard to resist for weight loss reasons?
It is all too easy for what might seem like isolated incidents like this to become quite regular occurrences. We need to make sure they are isolated incidents so that this doesn’t lead to a more serious relapse. Think about situations where you find it difficult to say no to offers of food and drink. Plan for how can you handle these situations. What might you say? (Check: can you see yourself saying this?)
Top tips to help you say “No” • When you say “No” remember that you are refusing a request not rejecting a person. Saying “No” does not have to mean a rejection. Much depends on the way you decline. • Try to take full responsibility for your refusal. Say “I can’t” when this is true, or “I don’t want to” when this is how you feel, or “it doesn’t sit well with me” if the request is not appropriate or makes you feel uncomfortable. • Say “No” with an explanation but don’t turn this into an excessive apology or excuse. You could make them aware you are following a healthy balanced diet. • Ask yourself if you are over-estimating the difficulty the other person will have in accepting your refusal. If you are able to express your feelings openly and honestly, you are also allowing others to express themselves. • Acknowledge your feelings. A simple statement like, “I feel guilty” or “I find this difficult”, allows you to express your feelings honestly. For example: “I feel bad about not taking you up on this, but I don’t want to eat this right now.” • Remember that even if you said yes when on refection you should have said “No” you have the right to change your mind.
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