Your Wedding

ABBEY UNITED REFORMED CHURCH ROMSEY www.abbeyurc.org.uk

Weddings An Information Leaflet

God is love and those who live in love live in God and God lives in them.

(1 John 4: 16)

INTRODUCTION: Your wedding day is one of the most important days in your life. As a church we want to ensure that the marriage service is a joyful and relaxed occasion.

We hope it will celebrate and strengthen your commitment to one another and give you a deeper awareness of God’s love for you both.

The starting point as you think about getting married in church is to contact the minister and arrange an interview to talk over your wedding plans and hopes. It is important to do this before going any further with arrangements, to ensure all goes well. We hope this leaflet will be useful as a checklist in your preparations.

contact the minister and arrange an interview to talk over your wedding plans and hopes. It is important to do this before going any further with arrangements, to ensure all goes well. We hope this leaflet will be useful as a checklist in your preparations.

PREPARING FOR YOUR MARRIAGE 1. Your wedding is both a religious and a legal ceremony. The Minister is authorised to conduct marriages, but you are responsible for giving adequate notice to the Registry Offices in the areas where you both live.

Each of you will need a Certificate for which you must give 15 days clear notice. The Certificates should be given to the Minister once you have received them. The legal side of your marriage should be dealt with early on in your preparations, because without the Certificates of Notice the marriage cannot take place. The Romsey Registrar is at Hayter House, Hayter Gardens and is part of the Hampshire Registration Service (0845 603 5637).

2. Informal Preparation evenings are held to help you look at marriage and to prepare for the wedding service. They bring together a number of couples in what have proved useful and enjoyable discussions. There is also the opportunity to ask practical questions. I will let you know the dates of these meetings well in advance.

3. A further meeting with me will be arranged to discuss the details of the service. You may wish to choose readings. You will need to make decisions about hymns and music at the service. This can be discussed with me or our organist Eric Warne (02380 253900).

4. Many couples like to have a printed order of service, ranging from a photocopied sheet to a printed order. Alternatively using the church hymnbook can be quite adequate. If you have printed sheets it is important that they are brought to church at least half an hour before the service.

5. You will need to decide whether you wish to provide wedding flowers for the church or ask the church to arrange flowers for a donation. Where there is more than one wedding on the day, couples sometimes share the cost of the flowers. For more information about flowers in church you can talk to Janet Littlehales (02380

Littlehales (02380 733654) or myself. Please let me know what you decide.

6. You will need to decide whether to exchange rings or have one ring.

7. A church officer will be present at the service, but you should arrange to have one or two ushers to arrive half an hour before the service to welcome guests and to hand out sheets or hymnbooks.

8. The service lasts approximately ¾ hour, including the signing.

9. Photographs are not allowed during the service, as this can be distracting for everyone (please make your photographer aware of this).

Photographs of the signing of the Register and as you leave the church are permitted; photographs can also be taken back in the church after the service. It is sensible to ask the photographer to introduce himself to me before the service begins. Please do not take photographs in the grounds of Romsey Abbey after the service.

10.

We allow a video of the ceremony to be taken by special arrangement, but it needs to be taken from a fixed position at the side of the church.

You would need to discuss this with me. There is also an additional fee if you choose to do this.

We encourage you to come to Sunday Worship at some point leading up to your wedding day (the services are at 10.30 am and 6.30 pm) WEDDING FEES Fees are normally paid in cash at the rehearsal for the wedding.

They are currently: Minister Registers (authorised person) Organist Church Officer Church Total

£60 £20 £45 £35 £100 £260

An additional fee for permission for you to record the service on video of £40 is payable. Fees will be reviewed and revised in autumn 2010

THE REHEARSAL A rehearsal is held in church a few days before the wedding, primarily for the couple. Others involved in the service are welcome to attend if they can.

THE WEDDING DAY 1. Bridegroom and Best Man are asked to arrive 20 minutes before the ceremony and speak to the minister. The Bride should plan to arrive in time to have photographs taken so that the service can begin promptly.

2.

The law requires that there are two adult witnesses at the ceremony who will sign the registers to affirm that they saw the ceremony and heard the vows.

3. Please remind your guests not to throw confetti outside the church, as unfortunately (because the church is in a conservation area) this is not allowed.

4. There is no church car park but there are a number of car parks in town.

5. Before the wedding party departs the best man is asked to collect the Marriage Certificate from the minister.

AND BEYOND !

The church offers its good wishes to you for your marriage and its support for the future. We hope that you will keep in touch and sense your part within the church family.

MORE INFORMATION In both your preparations and in the years ahead do not hesitate to contact the minister to discuss any questions or concerns.

Revd Terry Hinks Abbey Manse, The Abbey, Romsey SO51 8EL tel. 01794 512163 e mail tehinks@dsl.pipex.com