A Race for the Rest of Us

The Child Watch 0.5K

By Cassie Johnson

Have you always wanted to run a marathon, but don’t think you have enough in the tank to survive? If the answer is yes, we have the perfect event for you. The Child Watch Lazy Days of Summer/Fall 0.5K is back and lazier than ever. So sluggish in fact, they put it off until the fall! On November 12, all couch potatoes, lazy loafers, and slothful slowpokes are welcome to join the snail-paced fun. The Paducah Beer Works (PBW) parking lot will serve as the grueling course. If you can endure four laps around a flat parking lot, you’re a winner. Once again Child Watch and PBW are giving you the opportunity to experience crossing a finish line without getting sweat on your workout clothes! It's the race for the rest of us.

There’s No Rush

“The pandemic seems to have stripped all sense of time away from us,” said Janie Criner, Executive Director of Child Watch. “We previously held this event in the spring but we figured why rush? The 0.5K is a casual, humorous morning where participants make fun of themselves for pretending to be athletes. It’s a time to showcase the runners who normally wouldn’t even earn an honorable mention ribbon.”

Register Now!

There are not many rules. Register and raise money for Child Watch at runsignup.com. Adult registration is $40. For that generous donation runners get a newly designed extra-comfy t-shirt, a swanky 0.5K pint glass so you can hydrate long after the race is over, and of course a pretentious oval Euro-style decal for your car. It’s a $25 registration fee for kids 17 and under. Runners 17 and under will receive a t-shirt and decal. When registering, select minor and the reduced entry fee will be applied at checkout. Please don't get confused. Save your energy for the big day.

Team Work

Did you see the part about raising money? Get a team together and crowdfund for Child Watch. The team donating the most money is the big winner. Team Captains can create a team and send invites to other team members. You can set your own fundraising goal and start harassing friends and family for donations in no time. And hey kids! Get your kid-powered team together and show your parents who wears the sweatpants in the family.

On Race Day

Paducah Beer Werks is located at 301 N 4th Street in Paducah. Participants (21 and over) will receive a pint glass! At 10am-ish they will have a very minimal warm-up (wouldn't want to over-exert ourselves or pull a muscle) and then it's show time. The race will begin at 10:30am and should only take around 15-20 minutes as long as no lollygaggers drag it out. Four leisurely laps around the parking lot (relax - no one is counting) and bam! You cross the finish line and unleash your inner champion. Run, crawl, skip, sashay... anything goes and lollygagging is encouraged!

Costume Contest & Prizes

Awards will be presented after the last person crosses the finish line, then you’re done and have the whole day ahead of you to recover. Wear your favorite tacky sweats and outfits for the costume contest. Awards will be for best costume, largest team, and most creative finish line crossing. Visualize a dedicated runner drenched in sweat racing to the finish as the crowd goes wild. In reality, you’re trading the stopwatch and blisters for a donut and stretchy pants.

“Calories will help you recuperate,” said Criner. “So treat yourself to lunch at Paducah Beer Works and bask in the glory of your accomplishment.”

Nothing says victory like a basket of wings and pepperoni chips. You deserve it!

Child Watch Counseling & Advocacy Center

All proceeds benefit Child Watch Counseling and Advocacy Center. They directly support the CASA court advocacy program, prevention education, and mental health therapy services for children and families affected by trauma from child abuse or neglect. Learn more about their free services and volunteer opportunities at childwatchcac.org.

CASA of West Kentucky is an advocacy program that uses citizen volunteers to advocate for children who have experienced abuse. CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) volunteers are trained to evaluate the child’s needs and ensure they are met, both in the courtroom and in the community. It’s easier than ever to be a CASA through ongoing virtual training. The counties of McCracken, Ballard, Livingston, Lyon, Trigg and Caldwell are all covered. CASA volunteers are always needed. 