MISSED CONNECTIONS

RÍ RÁ IRISH PUB

1997

CreepedOut

Tell us about what you missed: You have a handlebar mustache and you frequent the upstairs bar. I felt like you were looking right through me, but you’re quite transparent yourself, mister. I’ve heard stories of people seeing you there often, but I never seem to be there when you are. I’ve heard if I ask too many questions your apt to disappear, but I just have one. Can I see you again? We’d have a killer time.

QUIKTRIP AT GRAHAM AND DALTON

3:30 a.m., October 15

TallGuyInMask

You were wearing grey sweatpants reaching for the chocolate milk. You took a lap around the store and got gas while looking for a phone charger. I was getting snacks and cigs at the register next to you. We locked eyes for a brief second as I was pulling through the parking lot. I’m glad you weren’t wearing a mask so I could see your face. You reminded me of home. I should have said hello.

DANIEL STOWE BOTANICAL GARDEN

October 14

CemeteryTote

You’re the dark-haired goth who works the front desk of the gardens. I’m the blue-haired goth with a cemetery tote bag. We shared our love of Halloween before you pointed me toward the orchid conservatory. Since you were working I didn’t want to come on too strong or do the wrong thing. I’d love to walk the garden with you sometime.

CORNER OF 4TH AND MCDOWELL

Sometime in September (maybe 16th?)

MostStephinitly

You were crossing the street as I sat at the light in a gray Lexus. We made eye contact, both smiled big, and you blew me a kiss with both arms out, which I returned. You stopped when you got to the other side of the street and looked back at me before walking a little further and looking back again. The light turned green.

TROLLEY BARN

October 9

CanadianTuxedoForever

You were walking by in all denim and a cowboy hat. You were carrying two coolers and walking with a group of friends. I was upstairs on the balcony and couldn’t get to you to say hi. Based on your out t, I think we are soul mates <3

HARRISBURG FOOD LION

Mid-October

TheresJustSomethingAboutMia (TJSAM)

I never saw such beautiful lips and eyes ever! You’re tall ... maybe 6-foot-3 and slim with dark brown skin and braids ... if I can’t have you, can I clone you?

PLAZA MIDWOOD BAR BATHROOM

October 12

Tommyboy1

To the girl sni ng a white powdery substance in the gender neutral bathroom. When I accidentally opened the door on you and you screamed “get the fuxk out of here weirdo” I think I feel in love. If you’d like to come watch Shrek with me please lmk!

NODA COMPANY STORE

October 12

NoDaDogDad

You brought your smaller shaggy dog (shih tzu maybe) to say Hi to my bigger dog. My dog wasn’t behaving the best so I was little too ustered to properly engage in conversation.

BLUE FLOWERS

Early October

SexyWeedGuy420

You were looking at gummies, I was simply trying to muster the courage to say Hello! I’m usually there on the weekends … don’t mention your boyfriend next time. He never comes in with you so it’s clearly not serious

SALTY PARROT BREWING

September 7

Satoshi Nakamoto

You were getting a beer and tried to pay with Bitcoin. You dropped your satoshis on the oor so I came by to help you pick them up. Our heads collided, we smiled at each other and not sure about you, but I was lost into the windows of your soul for a good hash. The energy between us felt like it could power the whole Bitcoin network forever. Let’s connect! I’m at Salty Parrot every 2nd and 4th Saturday

MATTHEWS DOWNTOWN CHURCH PARKING LOT

April 24

Latina In A GMC

He was leaving the parking lot when I arrived, smiled at me and left. Two minutes later he was back and parked right next to me and started to talk to me. I pretended I didn’t speak English because I got nervous and where I come from that situation would be highly dangerous. He tried really hard to talk to me in Spanish and never got out of his car and I insisted I had to go home, he looked disappointed and I think he found out I was faking my poor English.

CIRCLE K ON 3RD STREET

October 8

GirlAtCircleK

I pulled up to the pump next to you and smiled because something about you just drew that out. I thought about saying something but didn’t. You stared for a half second and then despite the rain falling from the sky you took the time to wipe and wash your grey truck windows. Were you waiting for me to say something? I nished lling up my tank and we both got into our cars at the same time. I looked over and you looked at me and we both smiled. You pulled out of the parking lot, and I followed, but you went to lunch and I back to work. If you see this, next time, I’d like to chance to say something.

AMOS’ SOUTHEND Balcony Blondie

At the Anthony Green show at Amos’, you are a 30 something dark-hair female with some tattoos. You were by yourself and I didn’t have the guts to say anything. I was on the balcony most of the night, but for the last few songs came down to the oor and was kind of in your vicinity. Wondering if you noticed me also?

PUBLIX IN SOUTH END OrganicStrawberryConvert

I was looking at strawberries in Publix and you also backed into me. You then proceeded to tell me that organic strawberries are always the best. I pointed out that the regular ones were $2 cheaper. You said that organic would add an hour to my life, and wasn’t an hour of life worth $2? I said you converted me, and I bought the organic strawberries, but I forgot to ask if you were going to take me out with the extra hour of life you gave me.