QNotes, January 12, 2018

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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inside

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online

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Community members share resolutions!

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news & features

Mike Pence swears in entertainment. news. views.

Dougarts.

Jones as Alabama’s new senator with his gay son by his side Jan. 3 goqnotes.com/57148

arts. news. views. justice 4 entertainment.

Partisan plan thwarts

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Trans military ban denied AIDS council fired News Notes: Regional Briefs News Notes: U.S./World Briefs LGBTQ archivist heads out New Year’s resolutions Changing My Reflection

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•••• Former Plaza Midwood gay bar changes hands to become a new rock venue Jan. 4 goqnotes.com/57162

more news & features …

a&e / life&style 20 21 22 23

Dishing with Buff Faye Tell Trinity Q Events Calendar Our People: Gerardo Madrid

opinions & views 10 Estate Planning 15 Spiritual Reflections

•••• Spiritual Reflections

Changing My Reflection

Taking a good self examination of one’s self helps to steer one toward greater things. page 15

Exploring ways in which undergoes physical changes during transition and athleticism. page 19

For more stories and partner posts visit goqnotes.com.

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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qnotes connect Jan. 12, 2018 Vol 32 No 19

arts. entertainment. news. views. goqnotes.com twitter.com/qnotescarolinas facebook.com/qnotescarolinas

contributors this issue

Buff Faye, David DuFault, Lynette Matusik, Lainey Millen, Rev. Lee Oliver, Jeff Taylor, Trinity, Jerry Yelton

front page

Graphic Design by Lainey Millen Photography: ponomarencko via Adobe Stock Mission:

The focus of QNotes is to serve the LGBTQ and straight ally communities of the Charlotte region, North Carolina and beyond, by featuring arts, entertainment, news and views content in print and online that directly enlightens, informs and engages the readers about LGBTQ life and social justice issues.

Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc., dba QNotes P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222 ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Sales: x201 adsales@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, ph 212.242.6863 Managing Editor: Jim Yarbrough, editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Editor: Lainey Millen, specialassignments@goqnotes.com Social Media Editor: Jeff Taylor, jeff@goqnotes.com Staff Writer: Jerry Yelton, jerry@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x205, production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.

Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2018 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorial notations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return. Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

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Partisan plot to remove judicial fairness in N.C. North Carolina’s Republican-controlled legislature continues to push against an equitable judicial system by proposing blindly partisan bills

by Jerry Yelton :: qnotes staff

Organizations like Democracy NC, Progress North Carolina, the North Carolina NAACP and North Carolina Voters for Clean Elections have hosted Fair Courts Rallies, Town Halls and Days of Action all over the state since the first day of the new year. In Charlotte, N.C. on Jan. 4, a group of protestors marched through Uptown Charlotte with signs that read, “North Carolina, we’re better than this,” “Fighting for Fair Courts, Fair Maps, Fair Votes,” and “Keep Politics Out of Justice.” With strips of tape plastered over many mouths and bullhorns leading the pack, the group was one of many that have made their opinions known in this unending battle for the courts.

It seems that North Carolina’s reputation for biased, partisan politics continues to ring true into the New Year. As the 2017 sessions close, plans have been laid to further strip Can true justice reign over North Carolina or is partisan politcs and plotting set to challenge faireness across the state? the democratic process as it influPhoto Credit: aquar via Adobe Stock ences judicial appointments. As it stands in North Carolina, the voters LGBTQ voters, in settings with stacked voters, most often voters of color, within strict ultimately control the courts, voting on their courts of conservative or Republican judges, boundary lines, limiting their power to enact judicial representatives to ensure a fair and are often left out of the conversation or change with their votes. This disenfranchisement balanced reign of law in the state. actively targeted. Without judges to fight can frequently lead to disillusionment with the Republican lawmakers, however, have against anti-LGBTQ legislation, like the atsystem, often causing voters to leave their ballots long had other plans for the judicial branch of tempts to bar transgender individuals from uncast. Ballots uncast by Democratic voters, in law. House Bill 656, enacted in October of last the military on a national level, there is no a state like North Carolina, will likely mean fewer year, removed primary elections for judges, check to ensure an equitable system of govLGBTQ-friendly votes counted on Election Day. increasing the length of already overlong balernment. Without equitable treatment under Another struggling aspect of the judicial lots in far too many districts. Since then, further the law, many protections recently ensured system in North Carolina is the reduction of the legislation has been introduced and proposed for minority voters, particularly those who size of the appellate court in the state. Effectively at the state level, some bills pushing greater identify as LGBTQ, have a distinct chance of removing Gov. Roy Cooper’s ability to make gerrymandering into legislative maps and being repealed or actively worsened. short-term interim appointments, this is another others eliminating judicial elections entirely, In 2018, the progress of this judicial gerryact of removing power from a Democratic leader removing the power from the people and placmandering and restriction will be one to watch. to strip the ability of voters to influence the ing it distinctly in the hands of politicians.

With the Senate back in session early in 2018, legislative and judicial systems in North Carolina.

This redistricting or legislative power removal changes may be seen and felt earlier than anCooper has stated his disagreement with the would result directly in negative consequences ticipated. Regardless, the North Carolina courts plans of the Republican-led legislature. He for LGBTQ North Carolinians and allied minority and the voters and citizens of the state have a has even stated that he will refuse an alternapopulations. Gerrymandered districts, almost lot of conversations to have about the future of tive “merit selection” process that involves a by definition, are drawn to hold Democratic North Carolina’s judicial system. : : lengthier vetting and confirmation process.

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news

Military March

Transgender people can now join the military despite Trump’s best efforts to ban them Advocates are cheering the news

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff

Transgender individuals are now free to openly join the military.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Transgender people are now free to join the military, after the Justice Department on Dec. 29 said its ban on transgender recruits was on hold and that it had no plan to appeal federal court rulings ordering the Pentagon to stop preventing them from enlisting. The change went into effect Jan. 1.

“It’s a victory for trans people, and it’s a victory for the military,” said Joshua Block, a senior staff attorney with the ACLU, told NBC. “There is no reason whatsoever why people

who can meet the rigid and very strict standards for enlistment should be barred from doing so simply because they are transgender.”

Donald Trump tweeted that transgender people would no longer be allowed to join the military back in July. That was followed up by a presidential memo in August that attempted to put the ban in place. A series of court cases followed, with 10 federal judges blocking the attempted ban.

“The military is allegedly supposed to give its recommendations to President Trump in February,” Block explained. “It’s entirely possible that they would just announce in February that they recommended that President Trump rescind the ban and he accept the recommendation, but that’s all in their hands.”

Block noted that the Pentagon’s own 2015 study demonstrated that transgender soldiers are not a burden to the military, as Trump claimed.

“At the end of the day, the military told Trump not to issue this ban. They warned him, and he did it anyway,” Block said.

“Who knows if the president is going to take their recommendations or not.”

Matt Thorn, executive director of the LGBTQ military organization OutServe-SLDN, called the news a “huge win.”

Both he and Block are optimistic about the future, with the wins in court and the belief that as more transgender individuals join the military it will be harder, as Thorn said, “to put that genie back in the bottle.”

“This is a major victory in the litigation and great news for transgender troops, transgender military academy and ROTC students, and transgender people who have been waiting to enlist,” said Shannon Minter, NCLR Legal Director. “There is no reason to exclude transgender people from military service, especially when they have already proved their ability to serve.

Transgender people are part of this country, and their willingness to take on the hardships and sacrifices of military service should be honored, not banned.”

“This is a historic and proud moment for our country.

Transgender people have made amazing contributions to our Armed Forces, serving honorably throughout the services including overseas and in combat. We are stronger when the military reflects all of who we are as a nation,” said Jennifer Levi, GLAD Transgender Rights Project Director. “At the heart of this case are brave transgender Americans who stand ready to put their lives on the line in defense of our country. Our nation will only benefit from the service of these courageous individuals. We know this fight is not over. But having transgender people be allowed to openly enlist in the military marks a huge development and hopefully the beginning of the end of this baseless ban.” : :

Health Beat

Trump fires all remaining members of HIV/ AIDS council without explanation The terminations follow the resignation of six members in June

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump fired the remaining 10 members of the Presidential Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS (PACHA) without explanation during the final week of 2017. The news came via letter sent by FedEx. The volunteer council was founded in 1995, and helps advise the president on the National HIV/AIDS Strategy, a five-year plan that details principles, priorities and actions to guide the national response to the HIV epidemic.

Six members of the committee resigned in June, saying the Trump administration had no plan to combat HIV. One of those members, Scott Schoettes, wrote in an editorial for Newsweek that the administration “seeks zero input from experts to formulate HIV policy, and — most concerning — pushes legislation that will harm people living with HIV and halt or reverse important gains made in the fight against this disease…Because we do not believe the Trump Administration is listening to — or cares — about the communities we serve as members of PACHA, we have decided it is time to step down.”

“The decision to resign from government service is not one that any of us take lightly. However, we cannot ignore the many signs that the Trump Administration does not take the on-going epidemic or the needs of people living with HIV seriously,” he added.

The other five members who resigned signed on to the article, titled “Trump Doesn’t Care About HIV. We’re Outta Here.”

“Current members of Presidential Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS (PACHA) received a letter informing them that the Administration was terminating their appointments,” said the council’s executive director, Kay Hayes.

“They were also thanked for their leadership, dedication and commitment to the effort. Changing the makeup of federal

advisory committee members is a common occurrence during administration changes. The Obama administration dismissed the George W. Bush administration appointees to PACHA in order to bring in new voices. All PACHA members are eligible to apply to serve on the new council that will be convened in 2018,” Hayes said.

Former council members were quick to point out that it is traditional to allow current members to serve out their term.

“It is important to have a rolling, transitioning body that crosses administrations that really has a set of diverse outlooks on the epidemic,” Patrick Sullivan, appointed to a four-year term in May 2016, told the Washington Blade.

Gabriel Maldonado, whose term would have ended in 2018, questioned the timing of the firings, both for President Donald Trump fired the remaining members of the Presidential coming a full year into the Trump administration, as well Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS (PACHA). as the fact that some of the Obama appointments were Photo Credit: Gage Skidmore, CC 2.0 License recently re-sworn in under Trump, when he extended Trump was also recently criticized for his World AIDS Day PACHA through executive order in September 2017. statement, on Dec. 1, which failed to mention the LGBTQ com“For more than 22 years, the Presidential Advisory munity or people of color, the two communities most directly Commission on HIV/AIDS has worked under both Democratic impacted by the HIV/AIDS epidemic in America. and Republican Administrations to ensure Americans affected Trump has also sought devastating cuts to HIV/AIDS proby this illness have a voice in our government,” said Peter Cruz, grams, including $150 million on HIV/AIDS at home and over $1 the Human Rights Campaign’s associate director of the HIV and billion in cuts from global programs.

Health Equity Program. “In the midst of slashing social programs Two unnamed officials told The New York Times that Trump that the LGBTQ community relies on, this action taken by the said during a meeting in June that people coming from Haiti “all Trump-Pence Administration is especially callous, irresponsible, have AIDS.” The White House has denied this report. : : and without logic.”

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news notes: carolinas compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

Bishop Curlin laid to rest CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Bishop Emeritus William G. Curlin, 90, died on Dec. 23, 2017. A funeral mass, which filled the sanctuary at St. Gabriel Catholic Church, was held on Jan.. 2 with a rite of committal following at Belmont Abbey Cemetery in Belmont, N.C. “Champion of the poor, comforter of the sick and the dying, friend of St. Teresa of Calcutta, Bishop Curlin preached the love of Jesus Christ during more than 60 years of priestly ministry, first in the Archdiocese of Washington, D.C., and the past 23 years in the Charlotte diocese. His lifelong commitment to Christ and His Church was epitomized by his episcopal motto ‘Sentire Cum Christo’ (‘To Think With Christ’),” the Catholic News Herald reported.

Curlin served as the third bishop of the Diocese of Charlotte. He also helped Fr. Gene McCreesh in the founding of the Diocesan Ministry for Gay & Lesbian Catholics at St. Peter’s Catholic Church in Charlotte, N.C. He was born on Aug. 30, 1927 in Portsmouth, Va. Photo Credit: Diocese of Charlotte via and was ordained with the priesthood on May 27, 1957.

St. Gabriel Catholic Church Other milestones along his life and celebrated career were being ordained as auxiliary bishop of Washington, D.C., Dec. 20, 1988; appointed bishop of Charlotte, Feb. 22, 1994; installed at bishop of Charlotte, April 13, 1994; and retirement as bishop on Sept. 10, 2002.

While in Washington, D.C., he collaborated with St. Teresa of Calcutta and opened the Gifts of Peace Home which served those living with HIV. When Curlin relocated to Charlotte, she visited him there and he welcomed her order, the Missionaries of Charity, to open a convent in East Charlotte to care for the poor and most vulnerable. His dedication to his faith and to the Catholic Church took him around the world serving both popes and humanity. He felt most at home out among people, the Catholic News Herald added. info: charlottediocese.org. catholicnewsherald.com.

Charlotte Lopez benefit slated

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — A Sisters Helping Sisters! benefit for Angela Lopez will be held on Jan. 21, 11 p.m., at Chasers, 3217 The Plaza.

Miss Charlotte Entertainer of the Year 2108 Lilli Frost will serve as hostess for the event that will feature a cast of divas.

Lopez has been undergoing serious medical issues over the past three months, has had to surrender her apartment and is living with friends. She is also unemployed.

Underneath the face of Lopez is 38-year-old Carlos Capps who has brought the drag legend to the stage.

For those who wish to perform, contact Tiffany Storm at 704-339-0500. info: chaserscharlotte.club.

Women to march again

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The One Year Anniversary of the Women’s March on Charlotte, Remarchable Women, will be held on Jan. 20, 12 p.m., beginning at First Ward Park, 301 E. 7th St., and ending at Romare Bearden Park, 300 S. Church St. A speakers forum is slated from 10 a.m.-12 p.m., at First Ward Park.

The event is sponsored by Charlotte Women’s March. It is being held as an entree to the 2018 Women’s March, #PowerToThePolls, which is being held in Las Vegas, Nev. on Jan. 21.

Organizers shared that the “March unites our communities and continues to empower grassroots change. We will work peacefully to send a bold message to our elected leaders that

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women’s rights are human rights.” It will follow the principals of non-violence as espoused by Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. and is devoted to uniting a diverse and inclusive group of individuals.

No sticks or posts can be used for signs and participants should only carry fanny packs or very small backpacks. Children are welcomed and are brought at the discretion of their parents. Pets are also invited to participate but asked to stay at the rear of the march route with their pet parents who will take charge of cleaning up after them.

The Organizing Committee for the Charlotte Women’s March invites Charlotte-based organizations focused on civil, religious, racial justice, sexual orientation and women’s rights to partner with the march. Email march organizers at charlottewomensmarch@gmail. com to express interest in participating in Remarchable Women and to learn more about how organizations can benefit from participation. Additionally, volunteers are needed. Email the organizers to learn more.

Contributions are requested to help defray the costs of the march. These can be monetary in nature or by way of services and supplies. Visit the website to find out what is needed and how to donate.

Registration is available online.

Other marches across the Carolinas and contact information are: Women’s Rally on Raleigh 2018, Jan. 20, 9 a.m., Halifax Mall, 16

W. Jones St., Raleigh, N.C., womensmarch onraleigh@gmail.com and Triad Women’s March On the Polls, Jan. 20, 12 p.m., Corpening Plaza, 231 1st St. W., WinstonSalem, N.C., wswomensmarch@gmail.com. info: charlottewomensmarch.org. powertothepolls.com.

Church welcomes pastoral candidate

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Metropolitan Community Church of Charlotte, 7121 Orr Rd., will welcome pastoral candidate Rev. Todd Goewey on Jan. 20, 12 p.m., for an indoor meetand-greet and picnic.

Earlier that day, he will preach at morning worship at 10:45 a.m.

Immediately following services, a special congregational meeting will be held to vote on the new pastor. info: mymcccharlotte.org.

Eastern Drag brunch approaches

GREENVILLE, N.C. — The Pitt County AIDS Service Organization (PiCASO) Drag Brunch will be held on Jan. 14, 11:30 a.m., at The Scullery, 431 Evans St. Cost is $10 and includes a buffet and tea or water. Specialty drinks are available at an additional cost.

A $10 contribution is also requested at the door and reservations are encouraged as the event often is sold out in advance. Call Scullery at call 252-321-1550 to reserve a table. info: picaso.org.

Triad Libraries awarded endowment grant to document LGBTQ history in Triad

GREENSBORO, N.C. — The University of North Carolina at Greensboro UNCG University Libraries has been awarded a National Endowment for the Humanities Common Heritage Grant to document the LGBTQ history in North Carolina’s Piedmont Triad region. The grant will enable University Libraries to collaborate with the Guilford Green Foundation to organize outreach opportunities for the LGBTQ community where participants can submit personal items for digitization and description, creating digital content chronicling the history of the population.

“PRIDE! Of the Community: Documenting LGBTQ+ History in the Triad” will be the first large-scale initiative to document the LGBTQ history. Given the unique cultural climate of North Carolina historically and presently, it is anticipated that contemporary materials will reflect political themes, especially in relation to the recent discord over North Carolina Amendment 1, House Bill 2, and House Bill 780. Additionally, with more than 20 institutions of higher education in the area, there will be documents and artifacts relating to LGBTQ student groups, including representation from three HBCUs. “The LGBTQ+ community has shaped the cultural and physical landscape of our area. We need to document their contributions to tell the complete story of Greensboro,” said UNCG University Libraries Manuscripts Archivist and Project Director Jennifer Motszko.

“An important part of this grant will be the ability to let the LGBTQ+ community tell it’s own story in its own way,” said Guilford Green Foundation Executive Director Jennifer Ruppe. “Programming will include both

a historical lecture and a panel discussion given by members of the LGBTQ+ community.” These events will be open to the public and will provide an educational opportunity for the Greensboro community to learn about and understand another aspect of the local history.

University Libraries will purchase equipment to be used in the digitization lab at UNCG, and the award will cover the cost of scanners and computers, a student coordinator position and public programming. Digitized content will be placed into UNCG’s open-access digital collections repository and the Digital Public Library of America.

“Upon completion of the project, the equipment will be used in UNCG’s digitization lab and made available to community partners, such as local libraries, museums and community groups on a checkout basis for their own events,” said UNCG University Libraries Special Collections Technician Stacey Krim. “Given the significant historical contributions from the Triad area to the LGBTQ+ community, we feel it is critical to preserve the diverse heritage.” info: library.uncg.edu. guilfordgreenfoundation. org. neh.gov.

Who dunnit bingo solves mystery

GREENSBORO, N.C. — The Guilford Green Foundation and Green Queen Bingo will hold its “Who Dunnit?” murder mystery event on Jan. 12, 7 p.m., at The Elm Street Center, 203 S. Elm St. Hey, what’s your aliBINGO? Tickets are $15/advance, $20/at the door and $12/student with ID. A Custom Jewelers Cabaret opens the evening’s program at 6 p.m. and doors open to the hall at 6:30 p.m. info: guilfordgreenfoundation.org.

‘Carr’ movie screening upcoming

WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. — Out at the Movies Winston-Salem will screen “The Fabulous Allan Carr” on Jan. 13, 7 p.m., at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts, ACE Theatre Complex, 1533 S. Main St. The film is a documentary from filmmaker Jeffrey Schwarz (“I am Divine” and “Tab Hunter Confidential”) and details the story of the flamboyant Hollywood producer, Allan Carr, famous for producing “Grease,” “Can’t Stop the Music,” “La Cage Aux Folles” and the notorious 1989 Academy Awards.

Tickets are $8 and are available in the lobby beginning at 6:15 p.m. or by calling 336-9180902. Cash, checks and credit/debit cards are accepted for payment. info: outatthemovieswinstonston.org.

Triangle Center announces area events

RALEIGH/DURHAM, N.C. — The LGBT Center of Raleigh, 324 S. Harrington St., has announced several events that will be happening across the Triangle during January.

On Jan. 21, 12:30 a.m., the Crape Myrtle Festival Drag Brunch will be held at Five Star Chinese Restaurant and Bar, 511 W. Hargett St., in Raleigh, N.C. Join Michelle Michaels, Jayden James Starr, Jada J, Jamie Monroe and Ebony Summers who will be on the dance floor. Music will be provided

by DJ Fred Livingston. Doors open at 11:30 p.m.

Tickets are available with a contribution online at co.clickandpledge.com.

Then later that day at 3 p.m., enjoy Vox Virorum Men’s Chorus concert, “The Universal Language of Arts,” at First Presbyterian Church, 305 E. Main St., in Durham, N.C. The chorus will also hold auditions on Jan. 30, 6

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p.m., at the church.

The chorus explores the commonalities of musical expression across the globe featuring choral works in Latin, Italian, Korean, Russian and Arabic.

“In a world that too often sees unfamiliar groups of people as the ‘other’ or the ‘enemy,’ we forget that different nations, religions, races, and even genders do not conform to one way of thinking,” the chorus shared.

Guest soloist will be Lesley Curtis. The concert will be directed by Jeremy Nabors, accompanied by Deborah Coclanis.

Admission is free, however, a $10 contribution is suggested. info: lgbtcenterofraleigh.com. crapemyrtlefest. org. facebook.com/voxvirorummenschorus.

Western Seniors slate 2018 dates

ASHEVILLE, N.C. — The Asheville Lesbian Seniors group have announced that they will participate in the 1st Anniversary Women’s March on Asheville on Jan. 20, 11 a.m., commencing at Roger McGuire Green, Court Plaza, and then proceed to Charlotte St. and circle around onto Biltmore Ave. The processional will end at the Vance Monument.

T-shirts are being sold to benefit Planned Parenthood. Ordering and pick-up instructions are available online.

To volunteer, visit signup.com/go/ZtOjLxo. Then later that evening, the group will meet up with the Asheville Lesbian Social Club at its women’s dance at 7:30 p.m., at Eleven on Grove, 11 Grove St., to listen to music and dance the

night away with tunes spun by DJ Esella, as well as enjoy fellowship. Admission is $10 and includes snacks and filtered water. A cash bar is also available. Music requests, including title and artist name, can be sent by Jan. 14 to esellat@yahoo.com. For those who wish to head downstairs to Scandals after the dance, simply ask the bartender for a hand stamp.

The group has also announced their 2018 brunch schedule for the third Sunday of the

News Shorts Group gatherings dot the map

STATEWIDE — A number of groups are hosting meetings, gatherings and other activities during January. Here is a list of those, along with date, time, location and a brief summary.

Those who are not a member of any of these groups can seek to be so. qnotes does not have any authority to approve memberships.

Lesbian Bikers Coalition will take to the road for its Wind Blow on Jan. 13, 10 a.m., beginning at Ride Now Powersports Concord, 254 Concord Pkwy. S., in Concord, N.C., for a ride to Lexington BBQ restaurant, 100 Smokehouse Ln., in Lexington, N.C. Proof of bike issuance will need to be given to the organizer at the time of the ride. Ride is facilitated in staggered formation. info: meetup.com/Lesbian-Bikers-Coaltion.

Charlotte Lesbian Kindred Spirits will meet on Jan. 13, 11 a.m., at Julia’s Cafe & Books, 1122 N. Wendover Rd., in Charlotte, N.C. for their first coffee social of the year. info: meetup.com/Lesbian-Kindred-Spirits.

Lake Norman LGBTQ Women’s Group will

news

month at a variety of locations in the High Country area. Those include: January, no brunch; Feb. 18, Native Kitchen, 204 Whitson Ave., Swannanoa; March 18, 1 p.m., Avenue M, 791 Merrimon Ave., Asheville; April 15, 1 p.m., Bonefish Grill, 105 C River Hills Rd.; May 20, 12 p.m., Roux in the Hilton at Biltmore Park, Biltmore Park Town Square, 43 Town Square Blvd., Asheville; June 17, 1 p.m., TBA; July 15, 1 p.m., Seasons in Flat Rock, 87 Lily Pad Ln., Flat Rock;

Aug. 19, 1 p.m., Native Kitchen, 204 Whitson Ave., Swannanoa; Sept. 16, 1 p.m., Avenue M, 791 Merrimon Ave., Asheville; Oct. 21, 1 p.m., Post 25, 2155 Hendersonville Rd., Arden; Nov. 18, 12 p.m., Roux in the Hilton at Biltmore Park, Biltmore Park Town Square, 43 Town Square Blvd., Asheville; and December, no brunch. info: groups.google.com/group/asheville lesbianseniors. squareup.com/store/ WomensMarchOnAsheville.

have “dinner in good company” on Jan. 13, 7 p.m., at eeZ Fushion Sushi, 16925 Birkdale Commons Pky., Huntersville, N.C. info: meetup.com/Lake-Norman-LGBTQWomens-Group.

Concord Gay and Lesbian Social Networking Group will meet on Jan. 14, 12 p.m., at Sacred Grove Retreat, 15750 Collie Rd., Gold Hill, N.C., in Gold Hill, N.C. for an Otter Dance Community Day Gathering. Other dates for this series are Feb. 4 and March 11. info: meetup.com/Concord-Lesbian-SocialNetworking-Meetup.

Charlotte Bisexuals Social and Support Group will meet on Jan. 19, 7 p.m., at Crave Dessert Bar, 500 W. 5th St., Suite 120, in Charlotte, N.C. Topics of discussion will be future events and ideas for programming, as well as meeting new members. info: meetup.com/Charlotte-Bisexuals-Socialand-Support-Group.

The Asheville Lesbian Social Club will hold its first women’s dance of the year on Jan. 20, 7:30 p.m., at Club Eleven on Grove, 11 Grove St., in Asheville, N.C. DJ Esella will spin. Snacks and filtered water will be provided, as well

as a cash bar. Free admission to Scandals is available with a stamp from the bartender. Cost of admission is $10. Other dates for the year are April 21, July 21 and Oct. 20. info: meetup.com/Asheville-Social-Club.

Charlotte Diversity Meetup Group will meet on Jan. 21, 4 p.m., at Three Spirits Brewery, 5046 Old Pineville Rd., in Charlotte, N.C. for a meet and greet gathering and to discuss the group’s vision and purpose, as well as its future event plans. info: meetup.com/Charlotte-Diversity.

LGBT Women’s Professional Networking will host a GAYme night on Jan. 27, 6 p.m., at a lounge at a member’s apartment complex.

RSVPs required. info: meetup.com/LGBT-Womens-ProfessionalNetworking.

Asheville Lesbian Social Club will hold its monthly topical exploration event, Conscious Conversations, on Feb. 2, 6:30 p.m., at Earthfare, Community Room, 66 Westgate Pky., in Asheville, N.C. The topic for its March 2 meeting is “Life is Temporary” and ask “So where are you stuck?”. info: meetup.com/Asheville-Social-Club.

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news

news notes: u.s./world compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

‘Fosters’ sets end date

‘The Fosters’ cast (left to right) Teri Polo, Sherri Saum, Hayden Byerly, Cierra Ramirez, Maia Mitchell, Noah Centineo and David Lambert.

Photo Credit: Freeform

LOS ANGELES, Calif. — The Peter Paige/ Bradley Bredeweg/Joanna Johnson Freeform series “The Fosters” will end its run with its summer season.

The series focuses on lesbian, same-sex married couple Stef Foster (Teri Polo), a police

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officer, and Lena Adams (Sherri Saum), a charter school vice principal, who take in troubled teenager Callie (Maia Mitchell) as a foster child as it navigates compelling and cutting-edge issues within the family unit and the outside world. The series has touched on topics includ-

ing immigration, foster care and juvenile court systems, rape, adoption, parenting, mental health issues, traumatic brain injuries, samesex marriage, discrimination, sexuality and sexual orientation, recovery, and others.

“The Fosters” began its winter season on Jan. 9 with a full 10-episode run. The summer season will be a three-episode installment, upon which a spinoff series will be introduced starring Cierra Ramirez (Mariana Adams Foster) and Maia Mitchell (Callie Adams Foster) in their young adult lives, Deadline Hollywood reported.

Taking a page out of the playbook of “Pretty Little Liars,” the network’s largest all-timeseries, the age jump of Mariana and Callie will take them to new adventures in Los Angeles, Calif. Other series regulars will make guest appearances.

“It’s been the privilege of our lives to get to shepherd this beautiful family through five seasons of love, laughter, heartbreak, tribulation, and triumph — and message to the world that DNA doesn’t make a family, love does. All while allowing us to explore some of the most pressing social issues of our era. Now that the kids are growing up, it’s time to take them out into the world, to see them make their way into adulthood, continuing their search for identity and love, and the pursuit of their dreams and purpose in this ever changing world,” Paige, Bredeweg and Johnson told Deadline.

The original series also stars David Lambert (Brandon Foster, Stef’s biological son), Noah Centineo (Jesus, Mariana’s twin brother, who was adopted along with her) and Hayden Byerly (Jude, Callie’s half-brother who is also adopted by the couple), in addition to police officer Danny Nucci (Mike Foster, ex-husband to Stef and father to Brandon). Some other series regulars are Alexandra Barreto (Ana Gutierrez, the twins’ biological mother) and Lorraine Toussaint (Lena’s mother), among others. Special guests throughout the series included Rosie O’Donnell, Annie Potts, Patrick Duffy and Rob Morrow.

The groundbreaking series earned praise for its portrayal of LGBTQ characters and issues, Deadline added. It won two GLAAD and a Teen Choice Award. It also became a bedrock for ABC Family which became Freeform, tackling controversial issues without hesitancy. “The Fosters” has been one of the network’s highest rated and most watched series in its entirety, and its current season ranks second in total viewers to the final chapter of “Pretty Little Liars,” the highest ranked in the network’s history.

Paige and Polo were guests at a Human Rights Campaign Carolina dinner in 2014 where it presented Paige with the 2014 HRC Visibility Award for his work with “The Fosters.” Paige was also an ensemble cast member of “Queer as Folk” where he starred as Emmett. info: deadline.com.

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life

New Beginnings

LGBTQ archivist, professor Josh Burford sets off for Alabama to record the state’s queer history Burford looks back on his time in Charlotte and forward to a new adventure

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff

W

hen Josh Burford first arrived in the Queen City in late 2012 to begin working at University of North Carolina at Charlotte (UNCC), even he, ambitious as he is, could not have predicted the impact he would have on the community.

Less than a year after his arrival, Burford, working with UNCC archivist Meredith Raiford, successfully launched The King-HenryBrockington Community Archive to preserve and document Charlotte, N.C.’s queer history.

His tireless efforts earned him national headlines and the honor of qnotes 2014 Person of the Year.

“It’s a big deal to try to illuminate the history of a community you don’t belong to,” Burford told qnotes at the time. “I was worried I would leave somebody out, or I was going to get something wrong, which is why I spent so much time working on it.”

As he prepares to leave Charlotte to head back to Alabama and begin the work of building a statewide archive, something he said he has wanted to do for years, he feels much the same way.

Burford recalls an experience he had in 2014, during the archive’s exhibition run at the Levine Museum of the New South.

“We had an older lesbian woman who went to the exhibits at the Levine, and she comes out of those exhibits just feeling really raw about what she had experienced. So, these things are not neutral. She had experiences with these materials, with these actions and these events.

They had deeper meaning,” he tells qnotes.

“She sent me this big, long email about how important they felt, and how difficult it was for her at the same time,” he says.

“And so, knowing that now, it really does help me to understand how when I approach someone about collecting the materials, the way in which I need to frame that for them, so they can understand what’s going to happen to it,” Burford says.

As a result of applying what he learned in Charlotte to his current project, his biggest to date, he says he has not yet received a single no from anyone he has approached about donating materials or otherwise getting involved in making the archive a reality.

The Invisible Histories Project of Alabama Burford, who helped create an LGBTQ community archive at the University of Alabama in Tuscaloosa, says he has been “itching” to get back to the state where he was born and raised.

“I mean, there have been more studies done on Mississippi’s LGBT history than Alabama’s, so it’s this totally untapped resource,” he observes. “I think that potentially people don’t see Alabama as a queer enough place to focus on.”

Burford, as usual, sees potential where others do not.

“Because I studied queer history in Alabama…[and] started teaching in the state, I have an affection and an affinity for the community down there. It’s beautiful, and nuanced, and complicated, but wildly underrepresented,” he notes.

The project’s website, invisiblehistory.org, launched in November, but the work to get the ball rolling has been going on behind the scenes for some time.

“I’ve been working on it for three years, getting ready to roll it out,” Burford says.

“We got our 501 (c)(3) in 2016 and we’ve been building the base to be able to roll the project out.

So, when the website went live in November, part of the investment in the project has been making sure that we have the infrastructure in place to run the project,” he continues.

“We’ve already gotten donations to the project that I haven’t officially collected yet,” he says. “We got close to two dozen archival collections that are waiting to be collected.

And we’ve barely started.”

The project is being backed by a number of partners, including University of Alabama at Birmingham (UAB) Student Multicultural & Diversity Programs, UAB Special Collections Library, Birmingham Public Library, University of Alabama School of Library and Information Studies, Equality Shoals and Druid City Pride.

Bigger plans than just an archive While a statewide queer archive is a big enough undertaking all on its own, Burford has plans beyond simply collecting and preserving artifacts. He wants to put them to good use in the community as well.

“The way this project is going to be different than the Charlotte project, is that we have two additional goals besides just the collection.

The second goal is, once the history has been collected and processed…we’re going to be creating modules for K-12 schools in Alabama,” he reveals. “So, we’re going to be giving the history back after two years, in these easily sustained modules of history that are interactive and have physical materials attached to them, back to empower [students].”

“We want to have this material ready to empower queer young people as quickly as we can,” he continues. ”Here [in Charlotte], that wasn’t an afterthought, but was sort of just something I did when I had time. Here it’s been focused on preservation and collecting, and then occasionally I would do a talk, or we would give some stuff to a school, but we’ve built that into the beginning of this project.”

“And then, ultimately, in a couple of years we want to open up a physical location that will have a display space for the history, will have museum space and archival space, and places for researchers to come and work with the collections, and a place to help organize the community. So, we’re thinking long term. We’re thinking Levine Museum of the New South

Josh Burford conducting an oral history project interview for the King-Henry-Brockington Community Archive during his tenure at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte.

level, that would be focused on the Southern queer experience,” he says.

That would include the entire South, not just the state of Alabama.

Keeping connections to Charlotte Burford might be leaving the state, in early February, but he will maintain a close connection to Charlotte and the archive he founded here.

He reminds the community that he can hop on a plane and touch down in North Carolina in less than an hour.

He will be teaching two online classes at UNCC in the spring, one of which will be

Modern Gay America. It is a class he has taught before, but never solely online.

If all goes according to plan, there could also someday be an Invisible Histories of North Carolina project, as he hopes to export the “blueprint” to other southern states to follow Alabama’s lead.

While he leaves with a regret or two, like coming up against a dead end in his attempts to start an LGBTQ community center at UNCC (administrators told him the project was “dead in the water”), he is pleased with the work he was able to do in Charlotte.

He is clearly inspired to carry on, to even bigger and better achievements, back to where it all began. : :

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NEW BEGINNINGS

The intricacies of estate planning for same-sex couples Considerations for those who are married or not in getting one’s affairs in order for the new year

by David DuFault, Sodoma Law :: guest contributor

W

hen the Supreme Court announced its decision in Obergefell v. Hodges* in 2015, it was rightly viewed as a victory for equality for same-sex couples across the country. As a result of the ruling, samesex marriages that had once been ignored, disregarded or deemed illegal were immediately granted the same full faith and credit as opposite-sex marriages through the U.S. While various states are still attempting to circumvent or invalidate the effects of Obergefell, estate planners today have an opportunity to design effective estate plans for all couples — samesex, opposite-sex, married and unmarried.

However, while the Supreme Court’s decision may appear to allow estate planners to approach advising same-sex and opposite-sex couples in identical ways, there are still intricacies to same-sex estate plans that attorneys must be aware of when advising clients.

Setting an estate plan in motion What are some of the concerns estate planning attorneys face when meeting with same-sex couples? Perhaps the first question that needs to be asked is whether the couple is currently married or has plans to get married in the near future.

While Obergefell was a significant victory for same-sex married couples, it had little impact on those couples not married or not wanting to get married. When a same-sex couple has married, or plans to get married, in theory their estate planning should not differ from any other married couples’ estate plan. The same issues that face estate planners of married opposite-sex couples exist when a same-sex couple is the client: • Who should be the recipient of the client’s estate at his or her death?

• Who should carry out the process of getting the client’s estate from his or her name to that of the intended heirs?

• If minor children are involved, who should have the care and custody of the children until they attain age 18?

In working with same-sex married couples, the answers to these questions are not all that different from the answers provided by opposite-sex married couples: • My surviving spouse or children should be the recipients of my estate.

• My surviving spouse should be the primary fiduciary to carry out my plan.

• My child’s surviving parent should raise him or her until age 18.

Opposite-sex couples, however, have little concern that their marriages might be subsequently ignored or invalidated. Same-sex couples cannot rely on the fact that marital recognition means that their estate planning concerns have been solved. To that end, married same-sex couples must use other opportunities available to them to carry out their goals.

But what if the same-sex clients are not married and do not intend to get married?

Couples have a wide spectrum of opinions on marriage, same-sex and opposite-sex. Some of them have waited for the opportunities afford-

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ed by Obergefell and are anxious to get their marriage license; others are just comfortable remaining in a mutually respectful relationship without the formality of “being married.”

Regardless of the reason for not getting married, same-sex couples face estate planning challenges from many states’ intestacy laws.

Every state has created a last will and testament for each of its residents. Each state’s intestacy statutes designate how an individual who has not prepared his or her own will would have his or her estate divided upon death. While the intestacy statutes are not as terrible as some would suggest (“if you don’t have a will, the state will get all your property”), pitfalls still exist. For instance, parents and other family members may not condone the relationship or actively exclude LGBTQ family members from the family dynamic. Relying on intestacy statutes for an LGBTQ estate plan could automatically make those non-approving family members heirs of the deceased’s estate, or worse, completely exclude a partner or committed advocate.

While the same problem exists for opposite-sex couples, the issue appears more detrimental when the same-sex partner is involved, because the reason for the familial exclusion is often based on the non-acceptance or disapproval of the LGBTQ person’s choice of romantic partner. Moreover, as discussed below, there are a core set of documents in every estate planning attorney’s toolbox when it comes to estate planning. Just as each state includes a last will and testament for each of its residents, many states also provide, by statute, the order in which individuals may be approached when end-of-life decisions must be made. Similarly, when court-appointed guardianships are required, those same statutes can mandate the order in which a court will consider who should be appointed. The relationship status of non-married same-sex couples to each other often will fall outside the scope of those enumerated appointees.

All of this can really be boiled down to the fact that regardless of same-sex, opposite-sex, married or unmarried, the most important thing every person can do when examining their estate is to plan it.

How to plan if children are involved If children are involved, the issue can be even more critical depending on the age of the children and what status the children and parent have. We are still in the very early stages for most states that are dealing with the process of same-sex parental adoptions. As each state develops its own processes, current considerations will center on the names that appear on the children’s birth certificate. For parenting purposes, the birth parents may be granted certain preferential powers when only one of the birth parents is living. The expectation is that states that have not addressed this issue in light of the validation of same-sex marriages will do so in the not too distance future; for example, in North Carolina the legislature and state’s attorneys are working with the

courts to make this happen. But what can be done in the interim?

Unfortunately, the best answer right now for same-sex couples with children might be to documents as much as possible, express their wishes in as formal and legal a way as possible, and hope for the best. The situation is even graver if the same-sex parents are not married. In those situations, the status of parent and child might have no legal significance on which a decision can be based.

While the care and custody of a minor child is likely of greater importance, unmarried same-sex couples, for many of the same reasons expressed above, may find themselves in a position where the child is viewed by the law as just a stranger. Opposite-sex couples can at least rely on intestacy to include a child in the scope of those who will inherit from a deceased. Until more is done, a child raised by one member of a same-sex couples could be a legal foreigner to that person, unable to inherit or take advantage of some preferential treatment when it comes to the estate.

Inheritance from other family members may also be an important topic for discussion among same-sex couples. For instance, what provisions might grandparents want to consider if leaving a portion of their estates to a grandchild to whom they are not biologically related? Fortunately for the grandparent (or aunt, uncle, etc.) who plans, this should not be an issue. By specifically bequeathing money or property to the named or identifiable child of a same-sex couple, such a gift will be effective to ensure the bequest is completed.

But, what if the grandparent has not created a will or has not updated a will that left a portion of the estate to a pre-deceased child? It is very common for wills and trusts to designate that the property that would pass to a son or daughter should pass to that deceased son’s or daughter’s “issue.” Will the child of a same-sex couple, not biologically-related to one spouse, be deemed “issue”? The answer again will depend on the situation.

If both names of the same-sex couples are on the birth certificate, the question should be easily answered: The child should inherit from the grandparent. Additionally, many wills and trusts include express language that adopted children are to be treated in the same manner as biological children for estate purposes. Thus, in situations where one same-sex parent adopts the biological child of his or her spouse, the grandparent’s intended gift should be honored.

Be sure to consider taxes Taxes can also be a subject of concern for same-sex couples. While the increase in the lifetime exemption amount to over $5 million has made tax planning a little less important than in prior years, more affluent same-sex couples may still be affected. Going back to the distinction between married and unmarried couples, samesex couples who have not married or who do not plan to marry, and who have estates larger than the lifetime exemption will likely owe estate taxes at death. Additionally, the Code’s allowance

for portability for an unused exemption applies to only married couples, whether same-sex or opposite-sex. Federal benefits are also affected, but again only if the couple is married.

The paper trail matters What are the available options or recommendations for same-sex couples? First is recognizing the fact that despite recent progress, same-sex estate planning still requires the parties to plan. Getting the basic four or five documents in place can go a long way toward alleviating the problems that can arise. To that end, durable powers of attorney for financial decisions, health care powers of attorney coupled with advance directives or living wills, guardianship provisions (both short-term and long-term) for minor children, and some combination of a last will and testament and trust document should all be included as part of the same-sex couple’s basic estate plan.

As with opposite-sex couples, the implementation of a comprehensive overall estate plan puts the power to make these most important decision in the couples’ own hands, not the state, the county courts, or others. But having those documents alone will not address all the issues that are out there. Same-sex couples must be proactive in designating where they want their estate or assets to go, and so other avenues must also be explored. Joint ownership of accounts, beneficiary designations, federal benefit programs, gifting programs, and non-probate ownership forms should all be investigated by the same-sex couple to maximize the opportunities available to transfer assets to the person or persons to whom the individuals would like to get their estates.

Joint ownership accounts with survivorship pass by the terms of the bank contract to the named joint owner. While these accounts can be brought back, generally, into the estate of the deceased person to pay creditors, the immediate availability to a surviving party cannot be understated. Similarly, joint ownership with a survivorship feature in real estate can also be an alternative. And while joint ownership with rights of survivorship is often how same-sex couples have titled bank accounts and real estate pre-Obergefell, one simple step that can provide additional protection is to re-title these assets as tenancy by the entireties, a special form of survivorship between spouses. In addition to the transfer-on-death aspect, tenancy by the entirety property has heightened protection from the credits of only one half of the couple.

Beneficiary designations Beneficiary designations are also important considerations. Many couples name each other as the primary beneficiary, and this is a routine practice in many estate plans. The concern is often the choice of a contingent beneficiary or the complete lack of a contingent beneficiary. While this problem is not unique for same-sex couples, it does compound the problem when an insurance company or plan

see Estate Planning on 16

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life

New Beginnings

LGBTQ Carolinians, others share their New Year’s Resolutions A new year can mean a new you

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff

I

t is that time of year again, namely the beginning, where we consider where we’ve been and where we are going and make resolutions for personal growth.

Here are some members of the LGBTQ community’s resolutions for 2018.

Janice Covington Allison My New Year’s resolution is to become more polite: Good manners have always been an important part of my life. They make it easier to connect with others, avoid offending people and ensure that others perceive me as a good and trustworthy person. Also, I need to bone up on dealing with rude people in the right way and learn how to say no more.

Lara Americo The past year was not easy. I hope this year we can continue to learn from our mistakes and forgive. Especially people from the queer community. We need each other more than ever.

Rev. Chris Ayers I want to have more transgender friends and make new friends who are drag queens. I believe transgender people and drag queens have so much to teach the modern church.

Jimmie Cobb I’m not really one for making resolutions, but why not give it a shot?

I want to make an effort this year to listen more closely to what individuals have to say. So too often in conversations, I find myself inquiring about people and their lives, asking the right questions, being concerned and trying to be a good listener, but in my effort to formulate the next question, I find myself not really listening to their responses.

My intent and the reason for this New Year’s resolution, is to be a great listener and a concerned friend. I frustrate myself quite often by not realizing that I really have not heard their answers. This is an injustice to them, and I find myself asking the same question again. It is not Alzheimer’s, but my desire to get to the next question.

Moving forward, it is my resolution to become a better listener and thus become a better friend, co-worker and family member and otherwise better person to those individuals I so value in my life.

Torie Dominguez I never make New Year’s resolutions…but I do make exceptions, so I’ll lay out some goals for 2018: to become more financially stable and physically independent, and to bring my day-to-day choices more in line with my values, for example by purchasing exclusively cruelty-free and vegan cosmetics.

Paige Dula My New Year’s resolution is to do my best to vote out the hateful NCGA [North Carolina General Assembly] and get some newer representatives who are pro-LGBTQ. Arthur Hartsell [I resolve to] do things I’ve wanted to but didn’t have the confidence to do and would talk myself out of, strengthen skills I have, fill gaps where skills are missing, grow in confidence and do the things.

Jamie Grace (aka Trinity) 1. Finding better dates.

2. Saving more money.

3. Driving less agressively.

4. Spending less time on facebook.

Stan C. Kimer I have always considered New Year’s an arbitrary date, so believe it or not, I have never made New Year’s resolutions nor set goals. Less stress and less chance of failure and disappointment that way!

Jack Kirven Be playful and remember to enjoy your fantasies!! They inspire happiness and drive ambition. Here’s my dream life, but what is yours?

If I had my way, my dream life would be performing my original postmodern performance art to generous audiences, studying languages, playing chess, and puttering around in a garden full of butterflies, hummingbirds, and honey bees while being surrounded by cats and Janet Jackson playing from the strategically placed speakers all around the homestead surrounding my tiny house. LOL #AuntMildred #NotAshamed Lainey Millen Last year was one that was as contentious as they come. For me, it was one of mixed emotions, sometimes hopelessness, sometimes irritability at the injustices I was witnessing and challenges which I’d sure not want to repeat. That being said, I resolve to be more positive and focused toward better health, simplification of my day-to-day life and seizing more precious moments with loved ones and friends while picking those causes where I feel my participation will be more realized. I won’t give up the good fight!

Lee Storrow In 2018, I’m hoping to make further political gains for HIV treatment and prevention advocacy. It’s time our state stepped up to make PrEP more accessible to those who need it. By the end of 2018, every local health department in the state should be prescribing PrEP, and the NC Department of Health and Human Services and General Assembly should work together to subsidize the cost of the medication and associated STI testing for low income residents.

Drew Swope [I resolve to] stop swearing. All my friends’ kids know words they shouldn’t because of me. I got a good education, but you’d never know it. So now is the time.

J. Wesley Thompson My New Year’s resolutions are to forgive quickly, take chances, love deeply, kiss slowly, give more than I receive, forget my mistakes but remember what learned, and be happy.

James Miller Finding the next space for our rapidly growing Center!

Rev. Debbie Warren Last year I read an article that inspired me to describe the feelings I wanted to experience during the upcoming year, rather than list resolutions. It pushed me to go deeper and think about the kind of experiences I wanted to have in the New Year. So when I think about the feelings I want to experience in 2018, the first that come to mind are awe and wonder — the kind of feelings I experience when I see a beautiful vista or go on an adventure in a National Park.

I also think of peace and security. These are feelings I experience when I tie up loose ends related to finances, bills, balances and know that I have a good plan in place for meeting my obligations and caring for my family.

Love and connection speak to creating more time with my partner and with my wonderful friends. This speaks to being really intentional about time, planning and ensuring that I don’t overcommit.

Bishop Tonyia M. Rawls While I did not make any resolutions this year, I did make a couple of life changes: I am kinder to myself, and I am committing to greatness in all that I do.

Jerry Yelton My New Year’s resolutions are to embrace my identities and live a queerer, more authentic life, highlight and validate the identities of others and bake better and more often. : :

Joanne Spataro [I resolve] to make the big leaps in 2018 I’ve been preparing for in 2017. And, continue searching for the best and brightest nachos in the nation.

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views

spiritual reflections

by Rev. Leslie V. Oliver :: guest contributor

Welcome to 2018!

B

y now, many of us have celebrated the transition from 2017 to 2018. It’s always exciting to begin a new year.

Resolutions, commitments at work and promises to loved ones are circling and everyone is excited for a fresh start. With such positive energy surrounding us, wouldn’t it be wonderful to add a boost to your efforts?

As we head into a new year, it’s also important to embrace our new beginnings with clarity. As we are intentional about what we want and need, we must also be clear on where we are in the present. The future is sure to be successful when we are intentional and clear in the present. Clarity is a gift that ensures that our plans are firmly executed; clarity gives us clear roads as we journey forward. A great way to find clarity is to be totally honest with yourself about who you are now, where you are now and what you have now. Who are you as a person or citizen?

Where exactly are you in your life right now? What gifts, insights and resources do you possess right now?

If you have answers to the questions above, take another step and ask yourself: Do you like who you are, or are there things you can work on? Do you like where you are in life, and is there a way to get to where you want to be? Have you fully exercised your gifts, talents and resources to get the best out of life? If you answer no to any of these, then the next question is: What are you going to do about it?

New beginnings in your life require you to really examine your life for ways to see, experience, contribute, and enjoy more of it. The human experience is amazing when you are clear on how you want to enjoy it. While we know that challengers are sure to join us in 2018, clarity and intention will help us to better embrace them and to learn more from them. We can then use them as launching pads to abundant life.

I have adopted the practice of using what I call “clarity statements.” I inform the universe of who I am and what my intentions are daily. I also speak aloud my needs and wishes, for I believe that there is energy in the atmosphere that will grab what I speak

aloud and allow it to take flight.

For example: “Just so we’re clear, I am amazing and nothing can stop me.” It’s as simple as declaring your success or your greatness. Once you know who you are and how you want to win, you state it with conviction and confidence. The universe, through your life experiences, will respond sooner than you think.

Take a moment this month to look at yourself closely. Identify what’s working in your life and what needs to be removed.

Be clear about the happiness you want; sow seeds into the abundance that you believe you deserve. Be sure to let love be at the root of all of your intentions, and you will see them grow.

I wish you all of the favor that God intends for you. I believe with you and for you. Just so you’re clear, I know that your new beginnings are going to result in an amazing and bountiful year!

— Rev. Leslie V. Oliver is pastor and founder of Sanctuary Outreach Ministries.

Visit them at sanctuaryoutreachministries.com.

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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life

Estate Planning continued from page 10 administrator notifies the survivor that there was no beneficiary appointed and the default payee will become the decedent’s estate. If the deceased took the steps to execute a last will and testament, it might not be an issue; however, if they have failed to properly plan the beneficiary designation they have likely forgone the creation of a will. Thus, those benefits go to the estate — which triggers the kinds of issues discussed above that can arise when one member of a same-sex couple relies on intestacy to distribute his or her assets.

Revocable living trusts One opportunity at the forefront of all estate planning today is the use of revocable living trusts (RLTs). RLTs have the advantage of being non-probate assets when looked at for distributing an estate to the intended beneficiaries, and thus are generally free from court interference. Additionally, because RLTs are at their most basic a simple contract, they have privacy as another fact that can recommend their use.

While privacy and probate avoidance may not be the only reasons to use RLTs, for same-sex couples, these advantages may tip the scales to including them in a comprehensive plan.

With properly funded RLTs, many of the financial aspects of estate planning can be tackled in a single document. Assets owned or titled by the trust (or trustee) can be controlled by a successor trustee upon the settlor’s death or incapacity, thus making the RLT similar to a combination will and durable power of at-

torney. And, because the settlor appoints his or her successors, an additional layer of court involvement can be avoided.

These opportunities are relatively easy to implement, and while some of them do require upfront costs (like the process of funding the RLT), the long-term savings, both in efficiency and economics, will considerably outweigh potential troubles associated with not following these recommendations. It cannot be overstressed that the simplest way to address the complexities associate with estate planning for same-sex couples is to get started.

Divorce One of the overlooked repercussion of the legalization of same-sex marriage is the fact that married same-sex couples now face the prospect of that marriage not surviving. They now face another issue: What should be done if the couple separates and ultimately divorces?

Similar to opposite-sex couples, a court’s order dissolving the bonds of matrimony will have the effect of voiding many of the provisions in estate planning documents that favor the other spouse. However, many jurisdictions require a term of separation before a divorce can be filed. In those instances, it is imperative the same-sex couples take the same precautionary steps that opposite-sex couples do.

As soon as practical, the separated and soon-to be divorced couple should update their respective estate planning documents. This includes not only the wills and RLTs, but also

powers of attorney, both financial and healthcare. It could also mean revisiting beneficiary designations, although in some instances these cannot be changed until the divorce order is issued by the court.

Ultimately, the love and excitement between couples that was generated by legalized samesex marriage could fade over time, and spouses may experience the same feelings of mistrust, anger, and in some cases, hate, that oppositesex couples face. If that time comes, would an individual want the estranged or former spouse to retain the power over his or her estate or financial affairs? Probably not, and thus the need arises to include a discussion about estate planning in the early stages of the domestic situation.

Conclusion Although these intricacies and nuances to estate planning for same-sex couples exist, the most important thing to communicate to all same-sex couples who find themselves contemplating estate planning is that they have the power to avoid or at least minimize many of the potential pitfalls. That fact alone makes their planning no different than anyone else’s.

The ability and relative simplicity of crafting a well-thought-out estate plan will provide peace of mind and efficiency, and ensure that each individual’s own intentions are followed.

Although situations remain for which even an executed estate plan cannot prepare, the vast majority of same-sex couples can alleviate the concern, worry, and uncertainty of what will happen after they are gone by simply scheduling a meeting with a local estate planning attorney and following through with his or her recommendations. The opportunity is there; same-sex couples and their estate planning attorneys just have to take it. : : *115 AFTR2d 2015-2309 (S. Ct., 2015).

Originally published: (“The Intricacies of Estate Planning for Same-Sex Couples,” David DuFault, “Thomson Reuters Estate Planning,” Volume 43/Number 8. [2016.][DuFault, David]) — David T. DuFault is an estate planning and business attorney at Sodoma Law, P.C. in Charlotte, N.C. DuFault holds a Juris Doctor from Campbell University, Norman Adrian Wiggins School of Law, a Masters in Accountancy from the University of North Carolina at Charlotte, Belk College of Business, and a Masters of Laws from The University of Alabama School of Law.

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qnotes

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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from the Rx pad……

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New Year’s Resolutions Setting Realistic Goals to Achieve Success It’s that time of year again — time to make those New Year’s Resolutions! For many people, starting a healthier lifestyle is at the top of the list of things that they want to accomplish in the new year. This is a great time to start fresh this next year on a brand new foot and make changes that will lead to positive outcomes in your life for years to come!

Many people start the year with a lot of ambition, but this can wear off after a few weeks. While this can seem like a daunting task, here a few tips and tricks to hopefully get you started on the right track, and most importantly, keep you on it!

First things first: 21 days. That’s the amount of time it takes for something to become a habit. Twenty-one days — that’s only 3 weeks! Think of how fast 3 weeks goes by!

Now think about all of the changes you may want to make in the new year. More than likely there is some change that you can make and stick with for three weeks. The key to success with this is to start small. Instead of trying to introduce many drastic lifestyle changes all at once, choose a few to start with at first.

Some good, small, manageable changes that you can start with that will help set you up for success in the long run include trying to get more sleep. Many of us are sleep deprived due

to all the responsibilities we have in our day-to-day lives.

However, sleep is one of the most important things that our bodies need, and lack of sleep can actually lead to weight gain in the long run. One way to try to get more sleep is to limit screen time. We don’t realize how much time we spend scrolling on our electronics, but an hour or more can sneak up on you very quickly! A good habit to get into is to make the bedroom a no-technology zone.

This will help you train your body to know that when you lie down in bed, it’s time to wind down and get to sleep! It might be hard at first to break the habit, but the more you do this the easier it will be for you to get to sleep and wake up rested and ready for the next day!

In addition to starting small, it is also important for you to be realistic with your goals. If you want to try and eat healthier in the new year, start by making a goal to drink more water each day instead of sodas and to incorporate more fruits and vegetables into your diet instead of saying that you aren’t eating sweets anymore. These small changes will help you over time to develop an all around more balanced diet and will help you make healthier choices day to day!

Starting a new healthier lifestyle can be hard, but the main thing to remember when starting on your New Year’s Resolutions is to keep a positive mindset and not give up! We all make mistakes and bad habits are hard to break. Make a promise to yourself that you will do your best every day and set small goals each month and stick with them! Make 2018 your year!

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Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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changing my reflection

by Lynette Matusik :: qnotes contributor

Transition and athleticism

H

ello readers, I hope your holidays went well.

Recently I’ve been analyzing the potential impact the transition process can have on society. A particularly controversial issue I have found is the subject of athleticism.

One of the cornerstones to the transitional process I preach is health. In physical activities, such as my passion for aerial circus arts, I’ve found a catalyst for both physical and mental health and something to enrich myself as a person.

I’ve also recently fallen in love with skating.

Local groups such as Skate Charlotte and the opening of the new Oso Skate Park in Plaza Midwood have given such warm welcomes to all interested in learning. Everyone in each group has been helpful in teaching me as a newcomer, providing abundant opportunity to improve my ability with the aid of positive, welcoming instructors.

The non-competitive nature of these sports is such that I can’t see hormones granting an extra edge to performance, but what about sports in which they might? Ideally, anyone transitioning should be free to be themselves and pursue whatever activities they wish. On the subject of competitive sports, the situation becomes more complex when we consider the potential for hormone advantages in what should be an even playing field.

Dutee Chand, a 19-year-old female sprinter, wished to compete in the 2012 Olympics. She was told she could only compete if she were to lower her testosterone through drugs or surgery

due to hyperandrongenism, a medical condition that causes significantly high levels of testosterone in women.

She challenged the International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) ruling and in 2015, the IAAF suspended their rule for two years in order to take time to study and research the issue. She was allowed to compete while the research was ongoing and last year the study found that “in certain events, female athletes with high testosterone levels benefit from a 1.8 percent to 4.5 percent competitive advantage over female athletes with lower testosterone levels.” However, the study still acknowledges that science has not conclusively shown that increased levels of testosterone provides women with more of a significant competitive advantage compared to factors like diet, access to coaching and training facilities, and other genetic and biological variations.

The only real conclusion I see that can be drawn is that further research is necessary and perhaps this is more complex than we yet understand.

Another example of controversy is found in the sport of Mixed Martial Arts. According to the Association of Boxing Commissions, to license transgender female fighters, they first “must undergo complete surgical anatomical changes, including external genitalia and gonadectomy and subsequently a minimum of two years of hormone replacement therapy, administered by a board certified specialist.”

This ruling was reached by a panel with the current understanding of the time it takes to eliminate/reduce male hormone genderrelated advantages in sports competition. The problem arises when considering the current understanding can change at a rapid pace.

Controversy arose when fighter Fallon Fox came out in 2013 as having transitioned, one year into her fight career with two professional fights under her belt. There shouldn’t be any question about whether she can compete or not and it’s absurd (not to mention offensive) to even question her gender and/or sex. She’s a woman eligible for competition and it’s awesome to see another transwoman comfortable with separating toughness and strength from masculinity. I truly admire that. In the interest of competitive fairness, the other fighters should maybe have a degree of transparency with what they’re up against. The issue comes down to a conflict of privacy vs. competive fairness, and the lines aren’t easy to distinguish.

The National College Athletic Association (NCAA) has established policies on transgender student-athlete participation. A transgender male (FTM) who has received a medical exception for treatment with testosterone may compete on a men’s team, but is no longer eligible to compete on a women’s team. A transgender female (MTF) has a different ruling in that the student-athlete must continue to compete on a

life

men’s team until undergoing one calendar year of hormone therapy.

I don’t relate to college athletics as a late 20s millennial, but I understand college is a time where many first start to figure things out.

I could see the issues being hard to deal with, but I also understand their necessity. I see no problem with rulings and policies. I believe it’s acceptable to have standards as they have a fair and scientific justification.

In fact, I see them as necessary. We’ve reached a point where there’s this destination, and it’s okay to reach for that point with transition. People are awake and aware to the fact that this is a thing, and that’s great. What feels lacking is the guidelines and rules that, if they were to exist, would eliminate some of the situational “what ifs” that plague those grappling with dysphoria.

I look up to and admire those who adopt strength as a defining aspect of their character. I would hate to see transwomen adopting weakness and lack of ability in order to appear more feminine. I see this as misogynistic. That behavior goes against everything I stand for. I, and many transwomen, feel the desire for recognition based on merit and ability rather than the transition process being the definition of our identities.

Athleticism is just one more place where that naturally occurs. I hope that society can reach a point where we find the balance between competitive advantage and even playing fields. : :

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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dishing with buff faye

by Buff Faye :: qnotes contributor :: info@bufffaye.com

All Stars Season 3: Take the ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ DQ Quiz

call or email us today 704.531.9988 adsales@goqnotes.com

“RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars Season 3” starts this month on Thursday, Jan. 25 on VH1. Nine of the 10 contestants have been announced, bringing back some of our all-time favorites.

Who will the mystery contestant be? Who will be your favorite?

Who will be chosen for the Drag Race Hall of Fame?

To get you primed and ready for “All Stars,” take this drag queen quiz about the Season 3 cast and get ready to sashay the runway!

1. What “All Stars” contestant competed in Season 2 and popped back up in Season 3 of “RuPaul’s Drag Race?”

A. Milk B. BenDeLaCreme C. Morgan McMichaels D. Shangela E. Thorgy Thor

2. W hat “All Stars” contestant fooled viewers with iconic Madonna looks while doing a commercial for MDNA skin care line?

A. Morgan McMichaels B. Milk C. Shangela D. Kennedy Davenport E. Aja 3. W ho deserves at least some credit for the past well-known phrases “Bitch, I am from Chicago!” and “You will speak when I’m done!”?

A. Morgan McMichaels B. Trixie Mattel C. Chi Chi DeVayne D. Kennedy Davenport E. Aja 4. Known better after leaving “RuPaul’s Drag Race,” she has one of the most unique brands and a popular web show — and she has what it takes to be in Top 3. Who is she?

A. Trixie Mattel B. BenDeLaCreme C. Shangela D. Kennedy Davenport E. Thorgy Thor 5. What “All Stars 3” drag race queen is quoted saying: “Treat everyone you meet with respect on your way to the top, because you may need their help on the way down… and please wear deodorant and have good breath while working in nightlife.”?

A. Milk B. BenDeLaCreme C. Morgan McMichaels D. Shangela E. Thorgy Thor 6. L ady Gaga said this “This girl — she’s gonna keep surprising you” about what “Ru Paul’s Drag Race All Stars 3” contestant?

A. Chi Chi DeVayne B. BenDeLaCreme C. Morgan McMichaels D. Kennedy Davenport E. Aja

7. W hat “All Stars 3” contestant actually beat “All Stars 1” winner Chad Michaels for the first California Entertainer of the Year pageant in 2010?

A. Trixie Mattel B. BenDeLaCreme C. Shangela D. Kennedy Davenport E. Thorgy Thor 8. In 2011, what “All Stars 3” queen was in the music video “S&M” by singer Rihanna?

A. Morgan McMichaels B. Trixie Mattel C. Chi Chi DeVayne D. Kennedy Davenport E. Aja 9. What drag queen sarcastically responded to another queen by saying: “You’re perfect.

You’re beautiful. You look like Linda Evangelista. You’re a model.”?

A. Chi Chi DeVayne B. BenDeLaCreme C. Morgan McMichaels D. Kennedy Davenport E. Aja 10. There are tons of rumors on the Internet.

Who do you think will be the surprise 10th contestant for “All Stars Season 3?”

A. Victoria “Porkchop” Parker B. Nina Bonina Brown C. Bebe Zahara Benet D. Other E. No idea DRAG TIP: Use a flash when you take selfies with your favorite drag queens.

Answers: 1. D / 2. B / 3. A / 4. A / 5. E / 6. E / 7. C / 8. A / 9. E / 10. ?

— Buff Faye calls the Queen City home and has two shitzus (plus she loves to raise money for charities). Find her at your favorite bars and hotspots. Plus don’t forget her monthly Friday & Saturday night shows, Sunday drag brunch and regular Friday night party bus. Learn more at AllBuff.com. Follow on Twitter @BuffFaye

SHOUT OUTS: Come out to Bar at 316 to watch “All Stars Season 3” for the viewing party on Thursday, Jan. 25.

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qnotes

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

goqnotes.com/to/arts

tell trinity

by Trinity :: qnotes contributor :: trinity@telltrinity.com

Two’s company, but three…may be a good thing Now really Trinity, Aren’t threesome relationships a guaranteed scenario for trouble, jealousy and inevitable failure?

Triangular Troubles, Houston, TX

Dear Trinity, Is it wrong to be on Grindr and Scruff when my boyfriend’s away? I’m just making friends!

Yours, App Cheat/Chat, Hollywood, FL

Now really TT, All relationships between two people, at one time or another, experience trouble, jealousy and possible failure. If you talk to many threesome couples, and I have, honey, the troubles are no different. However, the benefits include always having someone extra around to spend time with, help with the bills and fool around with! Yes, darling, it’s not for everyone, I agree, but it may be worth licking, I mean looking into!

Dear App Cheat/Chat, If your relationship is going strong or under three years old, then this is a huge danger and extremely unnecessary. If you want to make friends then go to parties, join athletic teams or intellectual groups with your partner or go to religious/spiritual gatherings together. Wake up! Those apps almost always lead to hookups or something your relationship doesn’t deserve. Pumpkin, having and dealing with one three-dimensional boyfriend with healthy needs is so much easier than dealing with an app full of two-dimensional needy sex addicts.

Hello Trinity, I’m thinking about doing drag. Any ideas?

Drag Thoughts, Memphis, TN Hello Gorgeous, There are many types of drag, for example looking cartoonish, looking like a famous woman or looking like a real woman. But no matter what: get assistance, find a dress you can breathe in and always remember, honey, you’re just a man in a dress unless you’re wearing a wig, lashes and heels (add a size and a half). Good luck! (For some tried-and-true tips, take a gander at my cartoon.)

Hey Trinity, Two days ago, my boyfriend announced that he wants to break up. But we’ve been together almost a year, and I just moved in with him six weeks ago. What do I do now!

Fooled Again, Cleveland, OH Hey Fooled Again, I know you want to feel like a fool, but, sweetie, you’re really just in a foolish situa-

a&e

tion. Living with and breaking up with someone could be devastating unless you read: Trinity’s Survival Tips For Living With A Lover Who Wants To Break Up 1. Don’t make any rash decisions or sign anything for two weeks. It’s impossible to think clearly during the first stage of a breakup.

2. Move out of the bedroom to the couch or guest room or have your ex do it. The time to stop yearning for his or her warm body is now!

3. Immediately stop sharing food, clothing, meals, showers and intimate moments together.

4. B eing mad is normal, even healthy, so for awhile avoid each other as much as possible, which leads to #5.

5. A void arguing at all costs. Say as little as possible for now. It’s not about who’s right or wrong; it’s about getting through the next couple of weeks.

6. S end your live-in ex away for a few days to a week. According to Delphine Hirsh’s book, “A Girl’s Guide To Surviving A Break Up,“ “When someone you live with wants to break up, send them away for a bit!” Then go to #7.

7. Immediately start 1) spending time with people who love you, 2) talking about your feelings and 3) oversleeping. This will help ground you.

8. Protect your home by telling your ex not to bring in any future dates or mates. You may feel like your home is all you have left, so protect it.

9. Do all of the above!

10. Lastly, you may want to 1) move out (with lots of help from friends), 2) move your ex out (with no help from you) or 3) stay living together (with even more help from God), which means setting up lots of new boundaries! : : info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.

Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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EVENTS

January-February 2018 Miss Chasers 2018!

Chasers 3217 The Plaza, Charlotte 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

Miss Chasers 2018 honoring Miss Chasers 2017 will feature Dorae Saunders, Tiffany Storm, Macy Alexander, Miss Charlotte Pride Aurora Carlisle and Mr. Chasers 2017 My’kel Knight Addams. Categories include Talent, Gown and Q&A. More information is available online. chaserscharlotte.club.

SEP JAN MO

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2018 Charlotte SEP JAN MO Women’s March First Ward Park 301 E. 7th St., Charlotte 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

On the one-year anniversary of the Women’s Marches that took place in Washington, D.C. and across the world, protesters will once again take to the streets to demand rights and recognition. Demonstrators will meet at First Ward Park and then take to the streets. Speakers will start at 10 and run until noon, and then the march will begin. More information is available online. facebook.com/events/135395813840257.

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Continues through Jan. 28 SEP JAN MO ‘The Phantom of the Opera’ Belk Theater at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center 130 N. Tryon St., Charlotte One of the world’s most beloved and well known musicals, “The Phantom of the Opera,” returns to Charlotte as part Stonewall Kickoff Social SEP JAN MO of a brand new North American Tour.

Boulevard 1820 See why critics are praising Cameron 1820 South Blvd., #106, Mackintosh’s new production of the Charlotte Andrew Lloyd Webber classic. The pro7-10 p.m. duction, overseen by Matthew Bourne and Mackintosh, features exciting special effects, and the famous score, with songs like “Music of the Night,” “All I Ask Of You,” and “Masquerade,” performed by a cast and orchestra of 52.

Tickets begin at $25. More information Join the crew from Stonewall Sports and tickets are available online. for a kickoff to the new year. Stonewall blumenthalarts.org.

Sports offers organized, team athletics for the LGBTQ community, and for those interested in getting involved, this is a great place to start. This is a free event. More information is available online. facebook.com/events/859968277510016.

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Submit your event to our calendar!

You can submit your event to our comprehensive community calendar presented by qnotes, the Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce and Visit Gay Charlotte. Submit your event at goqnotes.com/eventsubmit/ and get a threefor-one entry. All Charlotte-area events will appear on each of the three calendars at qnotes (goqnotes.com), Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce (clgbtcc.org) and Visit Gay Charlotte (visitgaycharlotte.com).

Charlotte Mini Con SEP JAN MO Grady Cole Center 310 N. Kings Dr., Charlotte 11 a.m.-5 p.m.

Join fellow comic book lovers at the Charlotte Mini Con, put on

by Heroes Aren’t Hard To Find, who also put on Heroes Convention. Check out new and vintage comics and meet creators, including Duane Ballenger, Thomas Boatwright, Chad Bowers and more.

Admission is $5 and kids 12 and under get in free. More information and tickets are available online. facebook.com/events/126650734673496.

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Lana Del Rey Live Spectrum Center 333 E. Trade St., Charlotte 8 p.m.

Lana Del Rey will perform live at the Spectrum Center, in support of her album “Lust for Life.” The album debuted at number one on the US Billboard 200 and has been well received by critics. Tickets start at $25 and are available online. lanadelrey.com/live.

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Jan. 12-25 . 2018

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SEP JAN MO

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To see more upcoming events, visit goqnotes.com/calendar/

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Stonewall Bowling SEP FEB MO Kickoff Party The Bar at 316 316 Rensselaer Ave., Charlotte 7-9 p.m.

Stonewall Sports kicks off its bowling season with a party for players and supporters alike. Registered players can also pick up their official shirts. Those who are interested in future seasons can get information. More information is also available online. stonewallcharlotte.leagueapps.com.

‘Eddie Izzard: Believe Me’ The Carolina Theatre of Durham 309 W. Morgan St., Durham 8 p.m.

Comedian, actor and activist Eddie Izzard, who came out as transgender this year, performs a show with the same name and themes of his new memoir, which is his first book. In it, he reflects on losing his mother as a child, going to boarding school, a life in the arts and self-discovery. Tickets start at $45. More information and tickets are available online. carolinatheatre.org.

Moral March on Raleigh & SEP FEB MO HKonJ People’s Assembly 2018 Corner of Wilmington and South Sts., Raleigh 8:30 a.m.

A coalition of progressive groups and individuals will descend on the streets of Raleigh to call for a progressive, inclusive and fair North Carolina for the Moral March & Historic Thousands on Jones Street (HKonJ) People’s Assembly. Folks will begin gathering at 8:30 a.m. for a pre-rally and people’s gathering beginning at 9 a.m. The march starts at 10 a.m. More information is available online. hkonj.com. naacpnc.com.

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Trevor Noah Live Belk Theater at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center 130 N. Tryon St., Charlotte 7 & 9 p.m.

The host of “The Daily Show,” Trevor Noah, will hit the stage for two shows in one night. Join the comedian, author and host for a night of standup. Tickets begin at $25.

Tickets and more information are available online. blumenthalarts.org.

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Submit your event at goqnotes.com/eventsubmit/

goqnotes.com/to/life

life

Our People:

Q&A with Gerardo Madrid Human Resources Professional, Culinary Devotee

by Torie Dominguez :: guest contributor energies are contagious” — Rachel Wolchin How do you spend your free time?

Running with the Charlotte Runners group, hanging out with my good friends, or traveling somewhere new.

We’ve all heard that smell is the sense most strongly tied to memory. What scents do you find most evocative?

Coffee. I love walking into a coffee shop and smelling fresh coffee.

If you won a multi-million-dollar jackpot, what would you do with the money?

Tell my parents they can quit their job, take care of as many people as I can, then travel the world.

H

uman Resources pro and Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce Director of Communications Gerardo Madrid has come a long way, literally and figuratively, to where he is today. Born in Mexico and raised in a small town in Georgia, he headed north to the Queen City as a young man to hone his skills in the art of turning out delectable desserts.

Instead, the prestigious Johnson & Wales University, and in particular its Campus LGBT Pride organization, became the place where he’d discover his talent for leading, motivating, and empowering the community to work towards a common goal. In this chat with qnotes, Madrid reveals the common thread that runs through all his endeavors: whether he’s helping an animal in need, whipping up a batch of feelgood pastries for a friend, or striving to ensure that the voices of LGBTQ+ individuals are heard throughout our city and far beyond, he’s always been the guy who’s there to lend a hand.

Which of your achievements are you most proud of?

Being the first person in my family to graduate from college.

What are you passionate about?

Being involved. Whether it’s volunteering in the community, being on a board, or just helping out friends and family.

What helps you relax when you’re feeling stressed?

Running and exercising. It keeps my mind off of whatever is stressing me out.

What cheers you up when you’re feeling down?

Talking with my close friends.

Are you an early bird or a night owl?

Night owl.

What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

“Surround yourself with people that reflect who you want to be and how you want to feel;

What household chore do you avoid at all costs?

Folding laundry.

What possessions do you cherish most?

Pictures and videos of my experiences throughout my life.

When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

A veterinarian.

If you could live in any time, past or future, anywhere in the world, what would you choose?

Future and Paris.

What do you like most about yourself?

Having a diverse group of friends from all walks of life.

What aspect of yourself would you like to change?

Hold myself more accountable to reach my fitness goals.

You can read only five books for the rest of your life. Which do you choose?

Culinarian books. I studied baking and pastry arts at Johnson & Wales University, and I still love to learn, practice, and enjoy great food.

Imagine traveling somewhere incredibly remote, with no way of contacting the outside world. Are you more thrilled or petrified?

Depends on the location, but most likely petrified in case of emergencies.

If you met yourself, do you think you’d be your friend?

Sure — I am always open to new friends.

What have you always wanted to do, be, or learn, but never gotten around to?

Make homemade sushi.

And finally, how would you like to be remembered?

Somebody who is always willing to help others. : :

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Jan. 12-25 . 2018