QNotes, March 8, 2019

March 8-21, 2019

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March 8-21, 2019

inside this issue

March 8-21, 2019 Vol 33 No 23

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feature

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news

contributors this issue

Buff Faye, Torie Dominguez, Rev. Malu Fairley, Lowell Fleming, Vic Gerami, Jack Kirven, Lainey Millen, NewsUSA, Stan Popovich, Trinity

front page

Graphic Design by Lainey Millen Photography: satyrenko via Adobe Stock

Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc., dba QNotes P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222 ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Sales: x201 adsales@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, ph 212.242.6863 Managing Editor: Jim Yarbrough, x201, editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Editor: Lainey Millen, specialassignments@goqnotes.com Copy Editor: Torie Dominguez, torie@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x205, production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.

Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2019 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction.

Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorial notations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return. Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

charlotteobserver.com/1166/ a local news partner of The Charlotte Observer

Queer singer/songwriter Erin McKeown will be in the Tar Heel State in Asheville, N.C. on April 25.

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4 Gov. Cuomo Seeks WorldPride Ambassadors 4 News Briefs 5 AGs File Amicus Brief 5 Howard Brown Helps Launch Advisory Network

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Mission:

The focus of QNotes is to serve the LGBTQ and straight ally communities of the Charlotte region, North Carolina and beyond, by featuring arts, entertainment, news and views content in print and online that directly enlightens, informs and engages the readers about LGBTQ life and social justice issues.

An Interview with Erin McKeown

The World of Vaping

12 10 Questions with Vic:

Featuring Shirley Manson 14 Hell, Yes: An Interview with Erin McKeown 15 Dishing with Buff Faye 17 Tell Trinity

life 8 Reap Health Benefits 48 Hours After Quitting Smoking 8 Breaking the Addiction 9 How to Convince an Addict to Get Help 11 GMCC: A Metamorphisis

views 13

Spiritual Reflections

events 18 St. Pat’s Day Parade/ Charlotte Goes Green Fest 18 Charlotte Dance Fest and QCity Dance Summit 2019 19 Hozier

Spiritual Reflections: From Hall Monitor to Hype Man!

Rev. Malu Fairley-Collins shares her experience and aspirations for becoming one’s best self, being a hype man and finding ways to communicate with God.

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March 8-21, 2019

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news New York Gov. Cuomo launches WorldPride 2019 ambassadors competition NEW YORK. N.Y. — Gov. Andrew M. Cuomo has launched the WorldPride 2019 Ambassadors competition, ahead of the WorldPride and Stonewall 50 commemorations planned for June. WorldPride, the largest international LGBTQ Pride celebration, is coming to New York City in 2019, marking the first time it has been held in the U.S. The commemoration includes marches, performances and festivals that promote the LGBTQ rights movement, and the WorldPride Ambassadors selected to highlight the diversity of New York’s LGBTQ community will be invited to join I LOVE NY in New York City to be part of the celebration, including participating in the Pride March.

“From the Stonewall rebellion to the recent passage of GENDA, New York State has been at the forefront of the LGBTQ rights movement, making it the ideal destination for WorldPride this year,” Gov. Cuomo said. “Together with our WorldPride Ambassadors, we will show that there is no place for hate in our state as we celebrate the LGBTQ community and continue to fight for a safe and equal nation for all.”

“There is no better venue for the first WorldPride coming to America than New York City during the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall uprising, which launched the national modern day LGBTQ rights movement,” said Lt. Gov. Kathy Hochul. “We stand with the LGBTQ community continuing to fight for their rights and protections, including the passage of the Gender Expression Non-Discrimination Act and a ban on conversion therapy recently. The WorldPride 2019 Ambassadors Competition will allow New Yorkers to share what makes their community special with countless tourists here to celebrate love and diversity.”

LGBTQ New Yorkers from across the state are encouraged to submit a video of no more than three minutes in length describing why they are proud of their municipality and state, and what in their town and region they would want to show off to LGBTQ visitors. Those selected as WorldPride Ambassadors will be featured in select I LOVE NY WorldPride promotions, as well as in educational anti-discrimination efforts by the New York State Division of Human Rights. For anyone interested in applying, more information is available bit.ly/2tGwZ1B. Deadline for video submissions is March 31.

The WorldPride Ambassador competition is part of New York State’s overall promotion of WorldPride 2019 and Stonewall 50. In June 1969, LGBTQ community members held spontaneous demonstrations at the Stonewall Inn in New York City, an event considered by many as the catalyst for the modern LGBTQ rights movement.

New York State and I LOVE NY continue to promote and encourage everyone to visit the state for Stonewall 50 and WorldPride 2019.

Over the past year, in partnership with the organizers of WorldPride 2019 and Stonewall 50 (NYC Pride/Heritage of Pride), I LOVE NY has been active at Pride events across the globe to promote travel to the event and the state. A targeted print and digital advertising campaign has been launched, promoting special WorldPride events happening across the state. More information on I LOVE NY LGBT, including the WorldPride 2019 Travel Guide, is available online at iloveny.com/lgbt.

Empire State Development President, CEO and Commissioner Howard Zemsky said, “The WorldPride Ambassadors competition is the perfect opportunity for New Yorkers from across the state to showcase the best we have to offer as we extend an invitation to LGBTQ travelers from around the world.”

New York State Executive Director of Tourism Ross D. Levi said, “I LOVE NY proudly invites the world to experience this summer’s Stonewall 50 commemoration by joining the festivities in New York City and throughout the state. With events like Pride on the Beach in Long Island, Pride at the Falls in Niagara Falls, and many other places in between, WorldPride offers the perfect opportunity for LGBTQ visitors to plan a dream New York State vacation, and we are excited that the WorldPride Ambassadors will help spread the message.”

Heritage of Pride Managing Director Chris Frederick said, “In June we will be welcoming the world to New York State for what will be the largest LGBTQ event in modern history. By working with New York State to identify these dynamic and inspiring WorldPride ambassadors, we hope to showcase the wide array of diversity that makes us proud to call ourselves New Yorkers.”

Throughout his time in office, Gov. Cuomo has been a national leader in championing LGBTQ rights. In 2011, New York passed the historic Marriage Equality Act and sent a message to the nation that it was time to end one of society’s greatest inequities. In 2015, Go. Cuomo implemented regulations affirming that all transgender individuals are protected under the State’s Human Rights Law, and ensured that all public and private employers, housing providers, businesses, creditors and others knew that discrimination against transgender persons is unlawful and will not be tolerated in New York State. Last year, Gov. Cuomo nominated Paul Feinman to the state’s highest court — the New York Court of Appeals — where he became the first openly gay person to serve on the court.

Earlier this year, Gov. Cuomo signed into law the Gender Expression Non-Discrimination Act and legislation banning the deplorable practice of conversion therapy, signifying a landmark victory for the LGBTQ community. Furthering protections and equality for New York’s LGBTQ community, the passage of GENDA prohibits employers, educational institutions, landlords, creditors and others from discriminating against individuals based on gender identity or expression, and makes offenses committed on the basis of gender identity or expression hate crimes under New York State law.

Additionally, Gov. Cuomo has committed to making New York the first state in the nation to end the HIV/AIDS epidemic and strengthened health care and insurance regulations to protect transgender New Yorkers.

In 2013, he launched the I LOVE NY LGBT tourism initiative to make an invitation through advertising, social media and experiential marketing to the $70 billion LGBTQ domestic travel segment to discover the attractions and activities of New York State. Last year, the governor opened New York’s official monument honoring the LGBTQ community, including those lost in the Orlando Pulse nightclub shooting in June 2016, and all victims of hate, intolerance and violence. The memorial, designed by artist Anthony Goicolea, is located at the western edge of Greenwich Village, in Hudson River Park.

Gov. Cuomo has also made investments in the tourism industry throughout New York State, generating historic levels of visitation and direct spending, his office said. New York welcomed a record 243.8 million visitors in 2017 who spent $67.6 billion, supporting a total economic impact of more than $100 billion for the fourth straight year. Tourism is now the state’s third largest employer, responsible for 938,800 jobs annually.

Official events for the month-long June celebration are listed online and ticket sales are now open. Some of the activities include a Pride march, human rights conference, Pridefest and Stonewall 50th Anniversary Commemoration, in addition to tours, exhibits and more.

European Gay Ski Week is a sponsor of the event with Masterbeat presenting One World. Entertainment includes an opening party, tea dance, main event and closing party. Limited VIP passes can be purchased in a presale for $549 online at bit.ly/2KcA7Nh. Host hotel for the event is the Wyndham New York and reservations can be made online at bit.ly/2GZ7Vf3. info: iloveny.com. oneworld2019.com. 2019-worldpride-stonewall50.nycpride.org.

— Lainey Millen

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March 8-21, 2019

BRIEFS Youth home to open

Atlanta, Ga.’s Rainbow House Coalition opened its doors this month for homeless, at-risk LGBTQ youth.

info: bit.ly/2HcBdGn.

MCC to host tea

Imani Metropolitan Community Church, 3602 C-View St., Durham, N.C., will host its Kentucky Derby Rainbow Tea on March 16, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Included during the event will be an auction and raffle.

Monies raised will go to support the ministries of the church.

info: imanimcc.org.

Trans org seeks team member

Transilient is searching for a social media savvy transgender or non-binary individual to fill a position on the organization’s team. For more information and/or to send a resume, email morethantrans@ wearetransilient.com.

info: wearetransilient.com.

A first for Trans Studies

“Introduction to Transgender Studies,” written by Ardel Haefele-Thomas and published in February by academic LGBTQ book publisher Harrington Park Press, is the first-ever introductory textbook intended for transgender/transgender studies at the undergraduate level.

info: harringtonparkpress.com/intro-totrans-studies.

Gay dads focus of study

A new study, conducted by Éric Feugé from the Université du Québec à Montréal, has found that gay fathers are more engaged in parenting than their heterosexual counterparts.

info: bit.ly/2EGUe1K.

Inmate seeks reassignment

Kanautica Zayre-Brown, a prisioner at the all-male Harnett Correctional Institution, is asking for reassignment to a women’s unit. Zayre-Brown is transgender and is post-operative. She is fearful and has been assaulted since her incarceration.

info: bit.ly/2Srimt7.

Book tackles gender transition

“She’s My Dad: A Father’s Transition and a Son’s Redemption” has been released and tells the story of an Evangelical pastor who transitioned from being a man to a woman and how his family dealt with the situation.

info: wjkbooks.com.

FCSJ hosts speaker series

The Freedom Center for Social Justice is hosting their second annual Liberating Theologies Speaker Series in partnership with Union Theological Seminary of New York’s Union of Affirming Christians​, and are reaching out to find two emerging theologian voices in the community to offer their perspectives. The speakers will deliver their message on May 25 at the Charlotte Museum of History and will join featured speakers Keri L. Day and John Boopalan. Deadline for submission is April 1. Visit bit.ly/EmergingTheologies for further instructions on how to submit a proposal.

info: fcsj.org.

Roller derby opens season

The Charlotte Roller Derby opened their 2019 season on Feb. 23. Tickets are on sale online at charlotterollerderby.org/ tickets for local bouts that are held at the Grady Cole Center.

info: charlotterollergirls.com.

AGs file amicus brief NEW YORK, N.Y. — New York Attorney General Letitia James led a coalition of 21 attorneys general in filing an amicus brief with the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Eleventh Circuit, in support of a transgender student named Drew Adams, who is suing the St. Johns County School Board for discrimination. The Court will soon determine whether the school board’s policy prohibiting transgender boys and girls from using restrooms that other boys and girls use discriminates against transgender students on the basis of sex, in violation of Title IX. “No student should ever dread going to school for fear of being bullied or discriminated against because of how they identify,” said Attorney General Letitia James. “Educational institutions have a responsibility to protect and educate their students—neither of which involve denying students access to the bathroom that aligns with their gender identity.

My office will ensure that all students are New York Attorney General Letitia James. treated with dignity and respect.”

(Photo Credit: Twitter) Drew Adams, an 18-year-old honor student at Allen D. Nease High School in Ponte Vedra, Fla., began using the boys’ restroom after his transition in 2015. After an anonymous complaint was presented against him, the school, citing the district’s policy on transgender students, told Adams he could only use gender-neutral restrooms.

The attorneys general argue in the amicus brief that in ensuring the rights of transgender people — including by allowing them access to the restrooms consistent with their gender identity — everyone benefits, while creating no public safety or personal privacy threat and imposing no meaningful financial burden.

Moreover, the attorneys general argue that the St. Johns County School Board’s policy violates Title IX by denying transgender boys and girls access to the same common restrooms other boys and girls may use – and therefore discriminating on the basis of sex.

The amicus brief was authored by Attorney General James and Washington Attorney General Bob Ferguson, and signed by a total of 21 attorneys general from New York, Washington, California, Connecticut, Delaware, Hawaii, Iowa, Illinois, Massachusetts, Maryland, Maine, Michigan, Minnesota, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Virginia, Vermont and the District of Columbia. info: ag.ny.gov.

— Lainey Millen

Howard Brown helps launch advisory network for Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Health CHICAGO, Ill. — Howard Brown Health announced its participation in an innovative community-­led research advisory network that will support the development of patient­ -centered research projects focused on addressing the health needs of transgender and gender non­conforming people (TGNC).

Entitled “Four Corners: TGNC Health Research Advisory Network,” (Four Corners) includes Whitman­Walker Health in Washington, D.C.; the Los Angeles LGBT Center; and Houston­-based Legacy Community Health. Combined, the four organizations currently serve over 10,000 TGNC­-identified patients. Led by Howard Brown Health, Four Corners will unite community members, researchers and clinicians from across the U.S. to facilitate equitable participation of all members to contribute to a patient-­led expansion of TGNC health research.

Transgender, non-binary and gender nonconforming individuals are people who identify with a gender that differs from the identity associated with the sex they were assigned at birth. According to a 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey on transgender health disparities, nearly one in four respondents reported they did not seek healthcare due to their fears of being mistreated as a transgender person; one­-third of respondents did not seek a healthcare provider when needed because they could not afford it; and 40 percent of respondents had attempted suicide in their lifetime — nearly nine times the attempted suicide rate of the larger U.S. population.

“This first-­of-­its kind research initiative will help U.S. healthcare providers understand the disparities in care for the transgender/gender nonconforming community and how to bridge gaps in care,” said Dr. Ann Barnes, chief medical officer at Legacy Community Health.

“Hearing from TGNC patients themselves will be critical in this work. We’re excited to be part of this project alongside other leading community health centers across the country.”

“The Los Angeles LGBT Center is proud to be a partner in creating Four Corners,” said Dr. Ward Carpenter, co­-director of the Center’s Health Services.

Howard Brown Health envisions a future where the health and wellness of LGBTQ people is affirmed with healthcare as a human right; where progressive social policy and enlightened societal norms uplift the lives of LGBTQ people and their families; and where affordable, accessible and culturally competent care from non-judgmental healthcare professionals is available and provided to all who seek it. info: howardbrown.org.

— Lainey Millen

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life

The world of vaping explored Younger Individuals Using New Alternative to Smoking

BY Lowell Fleming | QNotes CONTRIBUTING WRITER

Vaping has become a cultural norm for younger individuals who want an alternative to traditional smoking options. However, there is little data available on the health impact as compared to tobacco. (Photo Credit: Aliaksandr Barouski via Adobe Stock)

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he question of the health effects of vaping and its long-touted efficacy as a tool to quit smoking usually follow any nonvaper discussion of the lifestyle. In every snazzy bar/loungestyle smoke shop and on all of the colorful e-juice labels, you can still find the sober black text on white background label warning that nicotine is an addictive substance not suitable for minors. In spite of this, there is a persistent idea that vaping is “healthier” than cigarettes, and can even help cigarette smokers quit smoking by using a safer alternative to their nicotine fix. Vaping Daily, a major vape information website, has several “quit smoking” guides that make similar claims about vaping, but one can easily see links for “the best starting vapes” on the same page as these guides, so clearly there is a financial incentive to push that narrative. There is lip service to “cognitive behavioral therapy” and other discipline techniques to help fight addiction, but it doesn’t take long to find a link to a $70 vape mod that promises “superior cloud volume.”

Definitive answers from researchers about the health impact compared to tobacco are scant, given how relatively new vaping still is.

What can be said is that younger people are very much drawn to it, and any conclusions that can be drawn about their health have to factor in their often overworked and underpaid lifestyles. qnotes spoke to a couple of young men in Charlotte and asked them about their vaping habits and health.

Peter is a 21-year-old pizza delivery driver who works night shifts.

He has been vaping for at least two years, and frequently does so at work while on deliveries. His vape is a sleek, black-with-gold-trim device with angular surfaces like a cut gem. It looks like an iPhone that Louis Vuitton might have designed, but Peter apparently paid less than a $100 for the whole system. Peter says that he’s never smoked cigarettes, and that he got into vaping both as a “social thing” and as a way to help him stay awake and focused when he couldn’t justify consuming more caffeine tablets and energy drinks. He works long hours, and it’s not uncommon for him to get overtime. He admits that he does not have the healthiest habits, but does not buy into the idea that vaping nicotine is especially bad for him when it doesn’t have the tar and other carcinogens present in cigarettes.

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“My vape is on me as much as my phone is. I usually take a hit when I’m on a delivery.” He often complains about his back and joints.

He jokingly says that he “needs new bones.” All of his roommates, who work either food service or warehouse jobs, vape and have usually taken smoke breaks when they’re at work. One of his roommates is also a manager at the pizza shop, and it isn’t uncommon for him to decompress from busy rushes or rude customers with a five to 10 minute break just to vape and watch videos on his phone.

Mike is a 20-year-old engineering student who works two, 10-hour breakfast shifts at a Bojangles’ to pay rent while he is in school. He started vaping when he saw his older brother do it. He described being fascinated with both the smell and volume of vapor, and soon began to build his own vapes from parts he ordered online. He keeps spare cotton, coils and a line of various e-liquid bottles in a small plastic drawer on the table where he does his engineering homework. He is a natural tinkerer and has a passing knowledge of cars. From rural Western North Carolina, Michael has grown up around other smokers. He himself has been an adventurous smoker over the years, smoking everything from Black & Milds to pipe tobacco, but he “refuses” to smoke cigarettes. “I have asthma, and I really do think that vaping helps me breath easier.” He vapes a low dosage of nicotine, and will even vape with nicotine-free juice if he enjoys the flavor.

Vaping has been around long enough in the popular culture to develop its own culture footprint, so much so that “vaping” was the Oxford English Dictionary’s “Word of the Year” in 2014. Video tutorials, explaining vaping terminology, price ranges, e-liquid (or e-juice) flavors, tricks and other facets of the vaping lifestyle, can be found all over the internet. Although traditional head shops like Charlotte’s own Infinity’s End sell vape merchandise, the popularity of vaping has come to the point where shops like Charlotte Vapes and KURE, which cater exclusively to e-cigarette and vape users, are starting to become serious competition for the nearly 50-yearold local chain. see next page u

Smoking Cessation Resources Making the decision to quit smoking is difficult and the challenges in maintaining one’s choice to not smoke can be made a bit easier with the help of these handy support organizations and helplines. This is just a sampling of options available.

American Cancer Society 800-227-2345 bit.ly/2kcjq6D. cancer.org.

American Heart Association 800-242-8721 bit.ly/2NYADfh. heart.org.

American Lung Association 800-586-4892 bit.ly/2Rt5J4R. lung.org.

800-QUIT-NOW 800-784-8669 SmokeFree smokefree.gov.

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention bit.ly/2btnLfT.

Vaping may still have efficacy as a healthier alternative to cigarettes, but that concern is just one facet of the industry and culture of vaping. Vape pens with small tanks that take e-liquid at higher concentrations for more infrequent puffs remain the go-to for people more familiar with traditional tobacco smoking. Young people are vaping for all kinds of reasons, and could probably make due with more sleep and water instead of quitting. Between midterms, rent and night shifts, their vaping habits can’t really be seen as the primary indicator of good or bad health.

It isn’t adding years to their lives, but one would be hard pressed to get them to stop. : : Vaping devices are available in various forms.

(Photo Credit: J.A. via Adobe Stock)

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life

Reap Health Benefits 48 Hours After Quitting Smoking Body Responds to Changes, Senses Revived

BY NewsUSA | Guest Contributor

“W

ithin 48 hours of quitting smoking, health benefits begin,” said Dr. Steven Leers, a member of the Society for Vascular Surgery. “Blood pressure decreases. Pulse rate drops. The body temperature of hands and feet increases. Carbon monoxide levels in the blood return to normal.

The chance of a heart attack decreases.

Nerve endings regrow. There’s an increase in the ability to taste and smell.”

Dr. Leers is an advocate for not smoking. Research has linked smoking to cancer, vascular disease, stroke and lung disease.

“As a vascular surgeon, I’ve seen the damage done to veins and arteries from tobacco use,” said Dr. Leers. “Nicotine speeds up the heart and causes the body to release fat and cholesterol into the blood. All of these are related to vascular disease.”

In addition, smoking accelerates the hardening and narrowing of arteries.

Smokers are two to four times more likely to develop blood clots.

Nearly six million people die every year from tobacco use according to the World Health Organization (WHO). Of these, more than 600,000 persons die from secondhand smoke.

In the U.S., the 2011 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report “Tobacco Use: Targeting the Nation’s Leading Killer” indicates that smoking leads to 443,000 premature deaths annually from tobacco use or exposure to secondhand smoke. On average, smokers die 13 to 14 years earlier than non-smokers.

“Nicotine in cigarettes raises blood pressure and constricts arteries,” said Dr. Leers.

Narrowed arteries can result in:

The benefits of stopping smoking are realized within two days and helps bring the body back into a healthier state. (Photo Credit: hui_u via Adobe Stock) • Blood clots • Heart attacks (narrowed coronary artery) • Stroke (narrowed brain or neck artery) • Peripheral arterial disease (PAD) leading to gangrene and amputation (narrowed leg artery) • Erectile dysfunction for men in their 30s

and 40s (narrowed artery to the penis).

“Smokers are more likely to develop aneurysms (ballooning of an artery due to a weakness in the blood vessel wall) than non-smokers,” said Dr. Leers.

For information on smoking and vascular disease, log onto VascularWeb.org. : :

Breaking the Addiction Wave Goodbye to Smoking

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BY NewsUSA | guest contributor

he harmful effects of smoking are well known. But knowing the risks of smoking and the benefits of stopping doesn’t make it any easier to quit.

Quitting smoking is a serious commitment that requires devotion and support from friends and family. The process must be centered around your lifestyle and daily routines to ensure the addiction is kicked for good.

Don’t be ashamed to acknowledge the difficulty of this task or ask for help. Before you begin the journey to stop smoking, educate yourself on what to expect and strategies for getting through challenges.

Here are a few tips to help you get started: Smoking is an addiction. Don’t underestimate the power of cigarettes. Each stick is a highly efficient nicotine-delivery mechanism.

Smoking alters the structure and function of your brain so it constantly craves the alertness and calm produced by nicotine.

Your addiction takes many forms.

Cigarettes generate two types of addiction, physical and psychological. Your body is physically dependent on nicotine, but smoking has also become a comforting habit. Cigarettes are associated with specific people, places, activities, even emotions. Physical cravings are magnified by these mental urges.

Ease your reliance by using products like Nicorette gum. Nicorette gradually weans you by providing a controlled amount of nicotine to your system without the harmful toxins, tar, carcinogens or

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carbon monoxide found in cigarettes.

Discount retailer Dollar General makes Nicorette available at an attractive price.

Address your psychological dependence. The brain has already linked certain routines with smoking. You must realize these daily triggers and change your response. Instead of reaching for a cigarette on a morning break, take a nice walk around the building. Replace after-meal cigarettes with a glass of water or favorite dessert.

Smoking cigarettes damages your body, but it is reversible. Before giving in to a craving, remember that your heart and lungs are already healthier. : :

Break the smoking habit.

(Photo Credit: gorynvd via Adobe Stock)

How to convince an addict to get help Six Tips for Assisting a Substance Abuser

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any people who struggle with alcohol or drugs have a difficult time getting better. There are many reasons why these people do not get the help they need to get better. Many family members who see their loved ones struggle have a very difficult time in getting their loved ones assistance.

Here are six suggestions on how to convince a person struggling with alcohol or drugs to get the help they need to get better.

1. F amily intervention The most popular way to get someone the help they need is to do a family intervention. This is when family members and an interventionist get together with the addict to tell them how they love them and wish that they get help to get better.

Each family member takes a turn and tells the person how special they are and that they need to get help. The person who is struggling listens and, hopefully, they become convinced to get the help they need.

2. Talk to the person on what will happen if they do not get help Another way to convince the person who is struggling with alcohol or drugs is to get someone who is an expert on addiction and have them do a one on one talk with this person. This expert on addiction should explain to the addict what will happen if they do not

BY Stan Popovich |qnotes Contributing Writer get the help they need to get better. Basically, the expert should warn the person of the dire consequences of what will happen if they do not change their ways. The expert should be as vivid as possible and hold nothing back.

The goal is to convince the person to get help or they will suffer and eventually their life will slowly come to an end.

3. U se the services of a professional or a former addict Try to find a professional, or even a former addict who has “been there,” to talk to the person. This is similar to Step Two, however, instead of warning the person, these professionals can use their skills to talk to and try to reason with the person.

These experts are usually trained and can use a proactive approach into trying to convince the addict to get help. The goal is to try to reason and talk with the person so they can get professional help.

4. Find out the reasons why the person won’t get help Many people overlook this suggestion.

Ask the person who is struggling with alcohol or drugs to list three reasons why they will not get help. At first, they will say all kinds of things, but continue to engage the person and get the three main reasons why they refuse to get help. It might take a couple of

tries, but listen to what they say. Once you get the answers, write them down on a piece of paper. Note: Fear and frustration are huge factors for the person not getting help.

5. Determine the solutions to those barriers Once you get those three reasons, get a professional or an expert to find the solutions to those issues. For example, the person says that they will not get help because they tried a few times and they failed and that they will fail again. Ask a few addiction professionals to find a solution to this issue that will help the addict overcome this barrier. One good answer to this example is the following: “Yes, you tried to get better and failed, however, this time we will do things differently. We will keep a daily diary of everything you do, and you or someone else will document what you do each day. If you stumble or fail you will write down your feelings at the time and why you failed. When you recover from a bad episode you can read your diary and find out what went wrong.

Use your list from step three and list every positive thing that will counter those barriers. When you are finished, present this to the person who is struggling and explain what you came up with. This will help reduce the person’s fears and anxiet-

Finding ways to get an addict to seek assistance can be challenging, but the rewards are worth it. (Photo Credit: Photographee.eu via Adobe Stock) ies and may convince them to get help.

Developing a plan to counter their reasons of not getting help will go a long way.

6. T alk to the person instead of talking at them Nobody wants to be lectured. Be honest with them and tell them that it will require some hard work on their part, but that they can get better. If they don’t get help, they will suffer. The person who is struggling is scared, and they need help in overcoming their fears and resistance to getting help. Remember to find out those fears, address possible solutions to those fears, and you will have a better chance of getting through to that person. : : Stan Popovich is the author of “A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods.” To learn more, visit managingfear.com.

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Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte: A Metamorphisis Quillin Aims to Record LGBTQ Perspectives for Posterity

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BY Jack Kirven | QNotes Contributing Writer

he Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte (GMCC) has been an institution in the region’s LGBTQ community since 2006 when it was created by founding Artistic Director John Quillin.

The chorus gives many performances and workshop seminars throughout their annual season, and the group also sponsors clinicians who go into those public schools that already have choral departments. In addition to this, GMCC performs in many venues throughout the region that are located outside Mecklenburg County.

Quillin organizes these types of events to help generate buzz for smaller regional groups, in order to help them grow. In those instances, GMCC cedes all ticket sales to the up-and-coming chorus in question. The Charlotte-based chorus also plans events specifically in areas with a homophobic voting history where its performances might help local people understand the LGBTQ community better.

Visibility is at the heart of these efforts, and not only for promoting GMCC. In speaking with Quillin, he mentioned that his top priorities are social change, artistic excellence and family, which thrive during the events provided by the chorus’s extensive education outreach program. For this reason, it has been a central mission of GMCC to create opportunities for dialogue with disparate communities (particularly those that might be unfamiliar with or hostile toward LGBTQ people), training and performing opportunities for adult singers and safe spaces where gay men can bond during rehearsals and performances. In fact, Quillin described a scene where practically every rehearsal becomes an emotional epiphany for The Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte presents workshop seminars and performs for the audiences both in the Charlotte/Mecklenburg area and beyond. those singing together.

Another vital component of the programming at GMCC is the creation of new work. In was enough to be gay and on stage. That visibility in and of LGBTQ audiences. This practice serves not only to supmainstream choruses, it is very common for those groups itself was an important part of the evolution of queer liberaport and empower the LGBTQ community, but also allow to perform popular classics. These types of programs are tion. However, underwhelming performances of cliché dirgstraight people to learn more about the perspectives of based upon a history and tradition that already existed. es about death and isolation are no longer acceptable as LGBTQ people.

Those types of programs preserve pre-existing works, and staples in an LGBTQ performance. What is necessary is that One of the reasons Quillin considers this to be so vital although that serves a vital purpose in its own right, it does this new music properly record and represent the degree to is that LGBTQ history in general is terribly neglected and very little to bolster Quillin’s mission of social change. To which the community has made strides away from opprescomparatively poorly documented or studied. By sponsorthat end, he has focused much of GMCC’s resources on sion, beyond tolerance and toward broad acceptance. ing the creation of new work, GMCC is proactively consupporting LGBTQ composers who write LGBTQ music for In light of these priorities, Quillin has assisted in the tributing to the ongoing development of the community’s creation of a piece called “Unbreakable” by Andrew Lippa, legacy. Since there is little or no an up-and-coming Broadway composer. This work looks at tradition for GMCC to inherit or the ways in which LGBTQ culture has evolved from 1900 preserve, that material must be up to the present day. Quillin also commissioned a new armade de novo. After approxirangement of “Proud,” the theme song from the American mately 30 years of gay chorus version of “Queer as Folk” (one of the seminal LGBTQ organizing, there is finally a television series, which focused exclusively on LGBTQ generation’s worth of collected characters in the United States at the turn of the millensongs about the experiences nium). Also, two new songs have been added to the GMCC and views of LGBTQ people that repertoire: “Our #1 Problem” (which humorously explores can serve as time capsules to be the implications of HB2, the transphobic North Carolina opened again and again in sucbathroom legislation that prompted a global conversation cessive performances for many about transgender bodies and rights), and “At the Heart” years to come.

by Debi Jackson. In this song she comes to grips with her The high quality of this new four-year-old coming out as transgender. work is important, not only To underline the importance of creating this legacy, because no one wants to experiQuillin observed the degree to which he invests in comence lackluster music, but also missions, collaboration and workshops: GMCC typically because the LGBTQ community spends more on creating new work than all the other has made remarkable strides in music organizations in Charlotte combined. And how the intervening years. When the could it not? There’s an entire history to analyze, record first gay choruses were estaband celebrate. : : lished in the 1980s and 1990s it Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte Artistic Director John Quillin.

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10 Questions with Vic: Featuring Shirley Manson Rocking Singer, Lyricist, Musician

BY Vic Gerami | CONTRIBUTING WRITER I believe wholeheartedly in evolution. I think there are always some setbacks to and pushback against progress, but progress always wins in the end. I just wish progress would happen faster. So many good people are still forced to suffer so.

Fans are anticipating your seventh album sometime this year or in early 2020.

Can you share any news on that?

Our seventh album is scheduled for 2020. We are spending the duration of 2019 working on getting it done!

S

hirley Manson epitomizes the qualities of both a classic Rock icon and a contemporary rebel, always edgy and timeless. With over 25 years in the music industry as the lead singer of Garbage, a lyricist and a musician, Shirley has had exceptional successes, including double platinum albums with hits such as “Only Happy When It Rains,” “Stupid Girl” and “Vow.” But superstardom has not made her out-of-touch or complicit, as she is very vocal about social and cultural issues, always championing for the rights of the underdog, including female empowerment. I had the pleasure to interview Shirley while she was in LA from her native Scotland.

Modesty aside, how would you describe yourself?

Scottish, redhead. No further explanation necessary.

You received the Icon Award at the VO5 NME Awards last year. How do you reflect on your illustrious career, spanning over 25 years?

I can’t believe this is my life! It feels like it should have happened to someone else except it happened to me.

You have been ahead of the curve in more ways than one, about sexual orientation and gender roles with your song, “Androgny,” about owning one’s age, sexual liberation, LGBTQ rights and more… Does it feel like we are fighting the same battles all over again? Do you see any improvements?

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March 8-21, 2019

I never spill my secrets.

For more information about Garbage and tour, please visit garbage.com.

Vic Gerami is journalist, media contributor and the editor and publisher of The Blunt Post. He spent six years at Frontiers Magazine, followed by LA Weekly and Voice Media Group.

His syndicated celebrity “Q&A column, 10 Questions with Vic,” is a LA Press Club’s National Arts & Entertainment Journalism Award finalist. Gerami is a contributor for QNotes, Montrose Star, DC Life Magazine, Out & About Nashville, Q Virginia, GNI MAG, Windy City Times, WeHo Times, GoWeHo, Los Angeles Blade, Asbarez, California Courier, Desert Daily Guide, Armenian Weekly, GED, The Pride LA, IN Magazine and The Advocate Magazine.

“This Is the Noise That Keeps Me Awake,” a biographical book on Garbage, came out in 2017. How did the idea for the book come about?

We wanted to put a book together for all the kids in our lives so that when we are all dead and gone, they will know what it was we did with our lives! LOL. Edinburgh, Scotland, where you were born, is such a magical and fantastical place that most of us dream of living. How is it living in Los Angeles, and do you miss living in Scotland sometimes?

I love Los Angeles dearly, but, yes, I miss Scotland.

I miss the damp and cool climate. I feel overheated in Los Angeles all the time.

Tell me about your fans when they recognize you in public?

What is shared between us and our fans is sacred. I always feel honored when they are happy to see us.

What’s new on your play list?

Sharon Van Etten, Cherry Glazerr, Kelsey Lu, Leikeli47.

What is your favorite charity or cause?

The World Wildlife Fund, Amnesty International, The Trevor Project, Move On. Tell me a secret — a good one!

Garbage lead singer Shirley Manson. (Photo Credit: Joseph Cultice)

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From Hall Monitor to Hype Man! Spiritual Reflections

BY Rev. Malu Fairley-Collins | Guest Contributor Were there hall monitors or class monitors in your elementary school? That one kid that was assigned to keep watch over the students for the teacher. Their job was to make sure that their classmates followed the rules, that we didn’t get too loud, or run in the hallways, or get up without permission or get off-task. Being that hall monitor meant that they were trusted by the teachers to behave and they were willing to be a tattletale. The hall monitor was tasked with telling on their fellow classmates for any and all of their infractions. Do you remember that feeling of dread that came with realizing that the class monitor was going to tell on you? I remember the sinking feeling in my stomach, of knowing that I would have to suffer a consequence. Some privilege would be denied, or if I had too many warnings that day, I would get the dreaded note home.

Or maybe you were that kid. In third grade I got to be the class monitor on occasion. It came with a certain feeling of power, knowing I could potentially get someone in trouble. I took my tasks seriously. I was ready to write the names on the board of any classmate that talked during quiet time.

While I understand the need for hall monitors, with the ratio of students to teacher being way too high, the problem is many of us as adults are now suffering from internalized hall monitor syndrome. We have internalized this system of judgmental and intense self-monitoring so that we can report all our infractions to God. We live with the constant fear that God will find out that we have done something wrong. We have become our own tattletales, constantly looking for the ways that we are not measuring up so that we can please God by telling on ourselves. But what if God does not want hall monitors? What if God isn’t looking for tattletales? What if God does not want us to live in the constant fear of not being good enough or holy enough or worthy enough?

One of my favorite parts of hip-hop is the hype man. That dude that repeats the best parts of the rhyme with emphasis and energy. She is committed to making sure the audience hears and appreciate the artist. His passion is contagious, and her swag is enticing.

The hype man brings an element of fun and joy to the experience. What if becoming our own hype man is the antidote to internalized hall monitor syndrome? The foundation of our relationship with God need not be fear. Instead of constantly reporting our shortcomings, God wants us to celebrate our being and becoming. God wants to connect with us in joy and appreciation rather than condescension and damnation. God is calling you to

Be your own hype man and celebrate your life, beauty and wonder and connect with God. (Photo Credit: fizkes via Adobe Stock) acknowledge the beauty and wonder that is inherently embedded within you and in turn your daily life. It is my greatest hope that each of us will accept God’s invitation to shift from hall monitor to hype man! : :

qomunity

qonexions space starting at $22: call qnotes for details 704.531.9988

March 8-21, 2019

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Hell, yes: an interview Erin McKeown Queer Singer/Songwriter to Play in Asheville

BY Gregg Shapiro | CONTRIBUTING WRITER

S

ince the late 1990s, queer singer/ songwriter Erin McKeown has been making a name for herself as a distinguished performer with a rich and pure distinctive vocal style. McKeown expanded her creative horizons with the stage musical “Miss You Like Hell,” a collaboration with Quiara Alegría Hudes, for which she wrote the music and lyrics. As you can hear on “Miss You Like Hell: Original Cast Recording” (Ghostlight Records), the play is about the reunion between troubled mother and undocumented immigrant Beatriz (Daphne Rubin-Vega), who is facing the prospect of deportation, and her teenaged daughter Olivia (Gizel Jiménez) and the ensuing eye-opening road trip on which the pair embark. I recently had the pleasure of speaking with McKeown about the show and her work.

of marination and slow edits. I also loved writing for other characters which wasn’t too far a stretch from the things I’ve been making for years.

Even though I may use an I or me pronoun, I’ve been writing about other things and perspectives within my work. I enjoyed the distance of getting to physically sit between 10 and 100 feet from my music. To have it come out of someone else’s body and feel the reflection of that, rather than having to produce it myself, was inspiring and enlivening. If my goal is to help connect people, I have an opportunity to connect more people if I don’t have to be personally involved. That’s the thing about which I feel most excited about this phase of the show. I don’t have to be there for it and people can carry this show and this message like little seed pods that get to disperse. There’s a lot of openness and flexibility for the people performing this music and plenty of room for a performer to make each of these songs their own. That’s always a style I’ve been interested in. Not only do I not have to be there, but there’s room for any of these individual performers doing this show to bring their self to it.

Gregg Shapiro: Erin, you collaborated with Tony- and Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Quiara Alegría Hudes on “Miss You Like Hell,” which premiered at the LaJolla Playhouse in 2016, followed by an off-Broadway production in 2018. How did that collaboration come to be?

Singer/songwriter Erin McKeown is coming to Asheville on April 25 and will perform at Isis Restaurant & Erin McKeown: It came in a really cool way, Music Hall. (Photo Credit: Jo Chattman) actually. One of those things that’s kind of an unpredictable sum of all the relationGS: I’m so glad you mentioned thing was happening in the news. Then it became news and ships you’ve had before [laughs]. I made a that because I was wondering what was it like to have was growing in waves. I think it cuts both ways, to be totally record called “Hundreds of Lions” in 2009. Quiara had written Daphne Rubin-Vega, who made her Broadway debut as honest, with this show. I don’t necessarily think it’s a blessing a play around the same time called “26 Miles.” A couple of Mimi in “Rent,” singing your songs? to be putting this show out at the same time as we have this years later, she decided she wanted to make that straight play EM: [Laughs] oh, goodness. That has been one of the hugperson in the White House putting out the kind of rhetoric he into a musical. She asked friends of hers for names of some est gifts for me. I could talk about her for 100 years and not puts out. In one way, it’s super important that we are here, female singer/songwriters to whom she should be listening. be finished with the depth of her artistry and her intellitelling the kind of story that we’re telling, in some way pushing Her best friend from growing up went to college with me (at gence and the things that she brings and does as a musiagainst that tide. In other ways, in my personal opinion, there’s Brown), though I didn’t know her personally. I was known on cian that I’ve never heard anyone else do. She is a legend. also a type of fatigue or desire to look away because what campus for making music. This friend of hers put my name But maybe to a smaller group of people than she should we’re seeing in the news is so difficult. Many people look to on a list and gave it to Quiara. At the time, “Hundreds of Lions” be. She’s a transformational performer and it’s been a joy to entertainment for some escape, and we’re not offering that. was new. She heard that record and thought that’s what she collaborate with her in the way that we have. A production We’re offering people a chance to look more closely at somewanted the musical to sound like. She wrote me an email of this show is going to be running in Boston. It’s the first thing that’s difficult; to open their hearts to something that’s through the catch-all email on my website, which is generally time that someone other than Daphne has played Beatriz. difficult. I don’t think everyone wants to do that. filled with spam [laughs], but her email came through. It said, She has been with us from our very first workshop and “From one Brown grad to another, I have this play that I want through every workshop, production and rehearsal. Beatriz GS: Do you see it as being on par with the protest music to turn into a musical. By the way, I have a Tony (Award) and is a creation of Daphne and me and Quiara. She’s right in of the 1960s?

I’m a serious writer.” That’s how it happened! I’d never gotten there with that. Maybe it’s basic of me to say this, but I wish EM: Absolutely! I see it [as] something that we had to make, an email like that in my life. I answered it and she came to see more people knew about her. She deserves that. and there’s no way that we would not make it, regardless my show in New York the next day. We had lunch and she of what’s happening in the political landscape. We were gave me the script of the play and I just said, “Yes.” I had no GS: The gays know about her, that’s for sure. compelled, and we made the show we wanted to make idea that it would be a seven-year process.

EM: I know! We always know where the good stuff is. and it says the things we wanted it to say. In that way, it’s inevitable, and we are compelled by it. When we look back GS: The timely subject matter couldn’t have arrived GS: Do you foresee writing more for the stage? at these Trump years and we ask ourselves, “What did we on stage at a more opportune moment, especially EM: Yes, in February (2019), I actually had a workshop readdo to help?” I will proudly say we made this show. while we are living in Trump world. Can you please say ing of a new musical for which I wrote book, lyrics and music something about that? scheduled. I’m already on my way with a new musical project.

GS: As a singer/songwriter yourself, what are the EM: For folks that are undocumented and for people who challenges and rewards of writing songs for others, care about our immigration system, this is something GS: Is there a new Erin McKeown album in the works? especially characters in a play, to sing, and how do you that’s been going on for a long time. For a group of people, EM: Yes, there is. Given what I learned from “Miss You Like think that having written for the stage will impact your me included, it’s been very important for a long time. It’s Hell,” I’m going to let it take the time it’s going to take. I songwriting for your own recordings and performance? been said before, and it’s always important for me to say started working on it, and I know what it’s about. I’m superEM: The challenges for me were mostly in the length of the when addressing this topic, Obama was not that great on excited about it, and it’s personal. In some ways I have project and the amount of revisions. Music is on such a immigration. He deported more people than any previworried in the past that people wouldn’t be as interested shorter cycle and there’s a kind of elasticity and looseness and ous administrations. For various reasons, there wasn’t any if I just kept writing about myself; that somehow I needed nightly reinvention. Theater is a different animal. I’ve never legislation that was able to move forward. He’s not Trump. to be doing stuff in service of other people’s stories. I have revised anything as much as I revised and continued to chip been able to do that with this musical, and it’s been great. away at this project. It was a personal thing. The reward is GS: But he doesn’t get a pass, either.

But my roots are excavating my own biography and my own that I think we were able to make something that is extremely EM: That’s correct. This is an issue that I care about and am self to make music, so I’m working on a project that returns rich and has a ton of depth that comes from spending that interested in, and obviously Quiara cared about it. That’s the to those roots. : : much time on something. It was a great lesson. Everything I thing we added to this story in 2011. There’s no citizenship ismake after this musical will certainly be impacted by that. I sue in the play. The mom in the play is Puerto Rican and thereErin McKeown will perform at Isis Restaurant & Music Hall, 743 have learned to sit with something longer. I have learned to fore an American citizen. When we turned it into a musical, we Haywood Rd., in Asheville, N.C. on April 25. Doors open at 7 p.m. give more time and space to something. I can still write a quick introduced the immigration piece of it. I can only say that that Tickets are $12 and are on sale onllne at bit.ly/2NDIwI7. song, if I have to. But I’ve really seen the benefits of this kind happened because it was important to us, not because some-

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Take the ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ Season 11 Trivia Queen Quiz Dishing with Buff Faye

BY Buff Faye | CONTRIBUTING WRITER | info@bufffaye.com

Photo Credit: VH1 You knew it was coming. “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 11 is here. I decided to do another one of my Drag Queen Trivia Quizzes about the drag queens on Season 11, just for you. Take out your pen and don’t cheat by going to the bottom this time. Start your engines, and may the best “trivia Queen” win!

What drag queen was on Season 10 and got to come back for a second chance on Season 11?

A. Silky Ganache B. Vanessa Mateo C. Yvie Oddly D. Soju E. Eureka O’Hara What Season 11 drag queen won the title of National Entertainer of the Year?

A. Latrice Royale B. A. Brooke Lynn Hytes C. Honey Davenport D. Nina West E. Mercedes Iman Diamond Who was a former Miss Continental and is the first contestant from Canada?

A. Brooke Lynn Hytes B. Honey Davenport C. Scarlet Envy D. Shuga Cain E. Silky Ganache Who had the drag name Lasagna Frozeen prior to changing to her current Season 11 name?

A. Shuga Cain B. Silky Ganache C. Vanessa Mateo D. Yvie Oddly E. Soju What Season 11 drag race queen is thought to be one of the most controversial in the history of the show due to her comedy number about 9/11?

A. Kahanna Montrese B. Mercedes Iman Diamond C. A’Keria C. Davenport D. Ariel Versace E. Nina West Who is known for her YouTube show,

but lacks any experience as a traditional drag queen stage performer?

A. Shuga Cain B. Silky Ganache C. Vanessa Mateo D. Yvie Oddly E. Soju Who said “Move over ladies; this race just took an odd turn” when they entered the workroom for the first time?

A. Nina West B. Plastique Tiara C. Yvie Oddly D. Soju E. Jasmine Masters With parts in Off-Broadway plays, an electro band, and supposedly 18 pageant crowns under her belt, who is this drag queen from Season 11?

A. Brooke Lynn Hytes B. Honey Davenport C. Kahanna Montrese D. Mercedes Iman Diamond E. Ariel Versace What Season 11 contestant is from Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam as their hometown?

A. Ariel Versace B. Nina West C. Plastique Tiara D. Ra’Jah O’Hara E. Honey Davenport Whose drag mother is Sha’Nyia Ellis Narcisse?

A. Brooke Lynn Hytes B. Honey Davenport C. Ra’Jah O’Hara D. Scarlet Envy E. Shuga Cain Answers: 1.b, 2.d, 3.a, 4.b, 5.d, 6.e, 7.c, 8.b, 9.c, 10.c DRAG TIP: You can use hairspray to dab glitter on your eyelid. Glam that lid up!

Buff Faye calls the Queen City home and enjoys sucking popsicles (plus she loves to raise money for charities). Find her at your favorite hotspots. Learn more at AllBuff.com. Follow on Twitter @BuffFaye.

SHOUT OUTS: Join Buff Faye for the “Hello Dolly” drag brunch on Sunday, March 24. Buy tickets at AllBuff.com!

March 8-21, 2019

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Films released, shows premiere Spans media from the ‘net to TV

Compiled By Lainey Millen | QNotes Staff Writer Breaking Glass nets film rights, releases

Breaking Glass Pictures has acquired North American rights to the LGBTQ psychological thriller “Devil’s Path. The plot line revolves around the early 1990s, when two strangers meet in a wilderness park where gay men cruise for sex. Breaking Glass has also announced the North American release of the LGBTQ comedy-drama “Pinsky” which follows a young Jewish Russian-American woman as she navigates life, love, her overbearing conservative grandmother and standup comedy.

Additionally, the company has acquired rights to the LGBTQ romantic drama, “Honeyglue” which is now available on DVD and VOD. The film tells the story of Morgan, who has learned that she only has three months to live, thus turning her life upside down.

info: bgpics.com.

‘Now Apocalypse’ premieres on Starz

The coming-of-age comedy series “Now Apocalypse” will premiere on Starz on March 10 at 9 p.m. It stars Avan Jogia (“Tut,” “Twisted”) as Ulysses, who is struggling to figure out his life in the “surreal and bewildering” city of Los Angeles, Kelli Berglund (“Lab Rats,” “Dolly Parton’s Christmas of Many Colors”) as Carly, Beau Mirchoff (“Awkward,” “The Fosters”) as Ford, and Roxane Mesquida (Kaboom, “Gossip Girl”) as Severine, all of whom are on quests pursuing love, sex and fame. The series is cre-

ated and executive-produced by veteran indie filmmaker Gregg Araki (“Kaboom,” “Mysterious Skin”). Steven Soderbergh (“Logan Lucky,” “The Laundromat”) and Gregory Jacobs (“The Laundromat,” “Magic Mike XXL”) also serve as executive producers.

info: starz.com.

Film provides directorial debut

Tristan Scott-Behrends has made his directorial debut with the short film “Only Trumpets” in 2018 and the film has now made its way to its online premiere on Paper Magazine.

The storyline follows Tristan (Xavier Jimenez March) who looks for fulfillment through dating apps and casual sexual encounters. An unexpected glance across the bar leads to an evening of connection and passion with an “angelic equal” played by rising star musician and artist Daniel Crook.

info: bit.ly/2C3PpOl.

‘Stage’ series premieres

The queer, stand-up comedy “OUT on Stage: The Series” debuted earlier this year and includes an eclectic lineup of LGBTQ standup comedians. It features Jonathan Rowell, Brendan Scannell, Casey Ley, Julian Michael, Irene Tu, Jared Goldstein, Raneir Pollard, Kyle Shire, Jordan Pease, Chris Bryant, Eric Hahn, Daniel Webb, Joe Dosch, Gloria Bigelow, Anthony Desamito, Janine Brito, A.B. Cassidy and Zach Noe Towers. It is hosted by Zach Noe Towers and streams on Dekkoo.

info: dekkoo.com/browse.

Moore offers film for donation

Filmmaker Michael Moore’s “Fahrenheit 11/9” has been released on a limited-edition DVD and is available for a contribution to MoveOn and its fight for progressive change. Monies raised will go toward MoveOn’s fight against the Trump administration and agenda and will help them hire organizers, flood the streets with protesters, and pay for ads to help end the Trump presidency.

info: bit.ly/2UoQKGw.

History documentary released

Queer Bio has announced the upcoming release of “Being Different: 101 Global LGBTQ Individuals Who Changed The World,” a documentary showcasing significant people’s contributions and create a forum for these LGBTQ individuals to be celebrated. The project is currently seeking contributors toward the effort.

info: beingdifferentdoc.com.

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Barflies, Distant Men and Losers Tell Trinity

BY Trinity | CONTRIBUTING WRITER Hello Trinity, I met someone at the bar who says he “wants to be with me,” yet doesn’t want to do non-bar related stuff together, not even a movie. When I confront him, he compares me to his abusive ex. Is there an unhealthy issue I haven’t figured out?

He Loves Me… Not, Green Bay, WI Hello He Loves Me… Not, I don’t have much experience with abusive relationships, but I do with barflies, distant men and losers. And, honey, when someone doesn’t want to spend private time with you, they either need more time, need a therapist or really are not interested.

Either way, aren’t there other men who want to be with you, alone, outside a bar scene? When someone likes someone, they show it, not avoid it!

Hugs, Trinity

Dear Trinity, Come on! You know it’s all about sex, sex appeal and/or money when it comes to getting picked up or picking up someone. Don’t you think all this talk about “inner” beauty or intelligence is bull?

Beauty Or Bull, South Beach, FL Dear Beauty Or Bull, Yes, what you look like and have in the bank really helps to catch and keep someone, but eventually, baby, it’s inner charm, strength and humor that keep two people happy. In other words, you better have something “inside” that appears when your looks and money disappear! (Check out my cartoon for how I deal with this dilemma, sweetie!)

Kisses, Trinity Hey Trinity, My friends claim I’m neglecting them because of my new girlfriend. I want to spend time with them, but I don’t want to neglect my new relationship.

When is it safe to start spending time away from a relationship?

Time Away, Sante Fe, NM

Hey Time Away, According to “The Rules,” a book written for women to catch and keep men, which could apply to any relationship, “not being 100 percent available makes you look important and worthy.” So, sweetie, it’s never neglectful, but rather healthy, to spend time apart because… that’s what successful people do!

Good Luck, Trinity Dearest Trinity, My relationship is not perfect, but my other half thinks it should be. What does it take to make the perfect relationship?

The Perfect Solution, Baton Rouge, LA Dearest Perfect Solution, Having the perfect relationship is an unrealistic expectation, unless, of course, you have a staff of 10 scholars guiding you through every situation. So, pumpkin, post this list on your fridge and see if your other half lightens up:

Trinity’s Degrees, Training Programs and Licenses You’re Expected to Have for the Perfect Relationship

1. PSYCHOLOGY Degree: Because you’ll be expected to know just how to figure out, point out and prove it’s not your fault.

2. A CCOUNTING Degree: Because anyone can go crazy spending money, and you’ll be expected to know just how to pay for it.

3. LAW Degree: Because misunderstandings and/or accidents happen, and you’ll

be expected to defend your innocence.

4. HANDYMAN’S License: Because things break, and you’ll be expected to fix it.

So, keep the manuals!

5. CHAUFFEUR’S License: Because loved ones need rides, and you’ll be expected to be the designated driver to make everyone happy.

6. PSYCHIC’s License: Because you’ll be expected to “inwardly” know, see and/ or remember everything in the past… and everything that has not happened yet in the future.

7. SECRETARY’S Training: Because mistakes come back to haunt you, and you’ll be expected to “pull up” everything in perfect detail proving just what really happened.

8. MOTIVATIONAL Leader’s Training: Because one of you will surely be less motivated, and you’ll be expected to “take responsibility” and/or “take up the slack” for what needs to be done.

9. TELEPHONE Lineman’s Training: Because communication lines break down, and you’ll be expected to know just the right “line” to make it all work right.

10. N ANNY’S License: Because even if there are no children, you’ll eventually be expected to clean, cook, sew, nurture and keep everyone “pacified.”

With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org, Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! Learn more at telltrinity.com.

Send emails to: trinity@telltrinity.com.

March 8-21, 2019

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events March 8-17 Charlotte Ballet Presents ‘Peter Pan’

February 28-March 16 ‘Timon of Athens’

Club shows: The Wicked Witch 416 W. South St., Raleigh 8 p.m.

Community Shows: St. John’s Metropolitan Community Church 622 Maywood Ave., Raleigh 7 p.m. Feb. 28, March 8 and March 16 Shakespeare and Middleton’s unfinished play becomes a 1980s-set genderqueer exploration of tumultuous human relationships in this production by the groundbreaking Bare Theatre, whose design team and cast are both composed predominantly or entirely of queer artists, artists of color, and female-identifying artists. “Club shows” are restricted to patrons 18 and up and provide an immersive experience with simulated violence, sex and drug use, as well as flashing lights, smoke effects, loud music and prolonged periods of darkness. Club show tickets $18.

Performance dates are available online. “Community shows” are open to the public but still feature mature content and effects and are recommended for ages 13+. Admission to community shows is pay-what-youcan with a suggested donation of $15 at the door. baretheatre.org.

Knight Theater at Levine Center for the Arts 430 S. Tryon St., Charlotte.

Evening performances: 7:30 p.m.; Thursday-Friday, 7 p.m.; Saturday Family Matinees: 2 p.m. SaturdaySunday.

The classic J.M. Barrie tale is told through dance in a highly anticipated show appropriate for all ages. Weekend afternoon family matinees include related activities for kids in the lobby prior to the full-length performance. A special sensory-friendly production will be held Wednesday, March 13 at 1 p.m.

Tickets for all shows are $25-$85. charlotteballet.org/tickets/peterpan.

March 8-24 ‘Mamma Mia’

Winston-Salem Theatre Alliance 1047 W. Northwest Blvd., Winston-Salem 8 p.m. Wednesday-Saturday, 2 p.m.

Sunday ABBA’s iconic spectacular brings the Greek islands to a North Carolina stage. General admission is $18 for adults, $16 for students and seniors 62+. wstheatrealliance.org.

March 9 ‘Self-Care is Revolutionary‘

The Harvey B. Gantt Center for African-American Arts + Culture 551 S. Tryon St., Charlotte 10 a.m.-3 p.m.

The Harvey B. Gantt Center, in partnership with Charlotte Mecklenburg Library’s Community Read program,

QCity Dance, along with community partners including the Arts and Science Council, Foundation for the Carolinas, Charlotte Ballet and UNC Charlotte’s Department of Dance, presents three days of workshops, master classes, roundtable discussions and diverse performances. The organizers state that they “hope the weekend sparks new relationships and furthers conversations about the future of dance in Charlotte.”

Individual registration is $100 for professionals and $80 for students.

Professionals registering four or more participants simultaneously are eligible for a discount rate of $90 per participant. Various Locations and Times. qcitydance.org.

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Submit your events: editor@goqnotes.com

honors Women’s History Month with a day of activities designed to celebrate and inspire women while addressing some of the most pressing issues facing our community.

Events will include workshops in personal writing, storytelling, yoga and expressive movement, sound therapy, meditation and more. In addition, donations of career clothing will be accepted on behalf of the Beauty After the Bars organization.

Open to ages 10 and up. $5 general admission. RSVP online. ganttcenter.org.

March 9 OUTright Youth Signature Event

Café Rule 242 11th Ave. N.E., Hickory 6-10 p.m.

The 9th annual benefit supporting OUTright Youth of Catawba Valley.

Evening casual attire. Admission is $100, with tickets available for purchase online or by check. Sponsorship opportunities are also available beginning at $500. outrightyouthcv.org.

March 9 P!nk: Beautiful Trauma World Tour

Spectrum Center 333 E. Trade St., Charlotte 8 p.m.

One of the world’s biggest pop stars hits one of the city’s biggest venues.

P!nk will be joined by special guest Julia Michaels. Tickets start at $59. livenation.com/artists/51068/p-nk.

March 10 Asheville Drag Brunch Homeless Benefit

Bebette’s Café 221 Tunnel Rd., Asheville 1 p.m.

This week’s brunch, each of which is conceived to support a worthy local cause, is the first to benefit the area’s homeless and housinginsecure individuals. Featuring such performers as Divine (a.k.a. the Bearded Lady), Ginger Von Snap, Katarina Eclipse and Ida Carolina. General Admission $20. ashevilledragbrunch.com.

March 12 HIV Speaks on Jones Street

March 15-17: Charlotte Dance Festival and QCity Dance Summit 2019

March-April 2019

North Carolina General Assembly 16 W. Jones St., Raleigh 8 a.m.

NC AIDS Action Network’s annual day of education and advocacy in the state legislature. In-person registration commences at 8 a.m. followed by advocacy and issue training, held at the NC History Museum, until 10 a.m. Participants will then begin meeting with legislators, typically through mid-afternoon. Breakfast and lunch are provided. Members of the public can take part at no charge; those who are able to make a donation of $10-$20 are asked to consider doing so in order to help defray costs. bit.ly/HIVspeaks2019.

March 16: St. Patrick’s Day Parade and Charlotte Goes Green Festival

The city’s 23rd annual St. Patrick’s Day Parade sets off from the intersection of N. Tryon and 9th Sts. at 11 a.m. Its celebratory journey through downtown comes to an end near the site of the accompanying Charlotte Goes Green Festival, on S. Tryon St. between 3rd and Stonewall. The festival is free and open to the public and features traditional Irish music and dance, a diverse assortment of vendors and kids’ attractions, plus food and drink. Tryon St., Charlotte, Parade 11 a.m., Festival 10 a.m.-6 p.m. charlottestpatsday.com.

March 14-April 6 ‘The Great Beyond’

Hadley Theater at Queens University 2132 Radcliffe Ave., Charlotte 7:30 p.m. Wednesday-Thursday; 8 p.m. Friday-Saturday; 2:30 p.m.

Sunday An original comedy-drama depicting the aftermath of a family tragedy; companion piece to Children’s Theatre of Charlotte’s “The Ghost of Splinter Cove.” Open to children ages 8 and up. Pay-what-you-can showing March 14 followed by half-price previews March 15-16.

Beginning opening night, March 20, general admission is $15, $11.25 for students and educators, and $7.50 for military service members and veterans, the Queens community and members of the Arts and Science Council or WFAE, all with valid ID or proof of relevant donation. Premium tickets $21.50. Discount applicable toward admission to “The Ghost of Splinter Cove” included with purchase. Cast talkback will follow each Thursday night performance. atcharlotte.org/the-great-beyond.

March 15-24 ‘The Devil and Mark Twain’

Arts Center Live 300-G E. Main St., Carrboro 8 p.m. Friday-Saturday, 3 p.m.

Sunday This spooky new play posits a rich and potentially otherworldly inspiration for Twain’s most famous work, “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.” Tickets $16. artscenterlive.org.

March 15 ‘Culture + Kicks: The Intersection of Sneaker Culture and Social Justice’

The Harvey B. Gantt Center for African-American Arts + Culture 551 S. Tryon St., Charlotte 7-9 p.m.

A presentation and discussion centering on the connection between social justice and sneaker culture in Angie Thomas’ acclaimed “The Hate U Give,” one of the Charlotte Mecklenburg Library’s selections for its 2019 Community Read initiative. ganttcenter.org.

March 18 LGBTQ Bowling Night

Buffalo Lanes 5900 Oak Forest Dr., Raleigh 8:30-11 p.m.

Triangle Empowerment Center hosts a unique twist on bowling night with the addition of house music and a live drag show, plus free food, beverages and door prizes. The top team and individual MVP will be eligible to win cash.

Admission and shoe rental are free with on-site STI testing and for those taking PrEP, $8 without testing or PrEP. Doors open for testing at 8 p.m. triempowerment.org.

800-806-3558.

March 19-24 ‘Dear Evan Hansen’

Belk Theater at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center 130 N. Tryon St., Charlotte.

Various Times.

This acclaimed musical, which earned no fewer than eight Tony awards upon its debut in 2017, is a contemporary take on the age-old problem of a young man finding his place in the world. Tickets $35-$225. blumenthalarts.org. see next page u

REGULAR EVENTS Charlotte LGBT Chamber

Regular business meetings, social events and other activities throughout the year. Days and times vary. info: clgbtcc.org.

PFLAG Concord/Kannapolis

Meets for monthly group support meetings, second Tuesday of each month, 7-9 p.m., Trinity United Church of Christ, 38 Church St. N., Concord. info: bit.ly/1pCFVBq.

PFLAG Gaston

Meets for monthly support meetings, third Thursday of each month, 7 p.m., St. Mark’s Episcopal Church, 258 W. Franklin Blvd., Gastonia. info: pflaggaston.org.

Prime Timers

Monthly meeting including dinner, speaker, games and more for gay men ages 21 and up, 5-7 p.m., Park Road Baptist Church Fellowship Hall, 3900 Park Rd., Charlotte. info: primetimersww.com/charlotte/.

Stonewall Sports

Regular team sports, meet-up, social and service events throughout the year. Days and times vary. info: stonewallcharlotte.leagueapps.com.

Trans Youth Group

Time Out Youth Center hosts weekly discussion groups for transgender youth ages 13-20 each Thursday, 4:306 p.m., 3800 Monroe Rd., Charlotte. info: timeoutyouth.org.

Transcend Charlotte

Hosts twice monthly support groups for partners, friends and family of transgender and gender non-conforming adults ages 18 and older, second and fourth Sundays of each month, 6-7 p.m., Time Out Youth Center, 3800 Monroe Rd., Charlotte.

Prior to each meeting an anxiety support group is offered 5-6 p.m. info: transcendcharlotte.org.

UPDATES/ADDITIONS?

Do you have a regular and reoccurring community event you’d like listed? A listing to update? Email us at editor@ goqnotes.com.

a&e March 20-24 ‘C.S. Lewis Onstage: The Most Reluctant Convert’

Booth Playhouse at Blumenthal Performing Arts Center 130 N. Tryon St., Charlotte 7 p.m. Wednesday-Thursday; 8 p.m. Friday; 4 p.m. and 8 p.m. Saturday; 3 p.m. Sunday This provocative one-man show depicts Lewis’ evolution from staunch atheist to iconic Christian philosopher and author of such works as “The Screwtape Letters” and the more subtly theological “Chronicles of Narnia.” Recommended for ages 13 and over. Children under 4 will not be admitted. Tickets $39-$89. bit.ly/ReluctantConvert.

March 21 LGBTQ+ and Ally Cross-Company Mixer

Bar Argon 4544 South Blvd., Charlotte 5:30-8 p.m.

Queen City Connects hosts an evening of networking to foster productive relationships among LGBTQ-inclusive businesses, organizations and professionals. Registration is not required and admission is free, though donations are accepted. bit.ly/AllyMixer.

March 22-23 ‘The Best of Rodgers and Hammerstein’

Knight Theater at Levine Center for the Arts 430 S. Tryon St., Charlotte 7:30 p.m.

The Charlotte Symphony delivers a bevy of favorites from the catalogue of one of musical theater’s most beloved composing teams, Including selections from “The Sound of Music,” “South Pacific,” “The King and I,” “Carousel” and more. Tickets $30-$180. charlottesymphony.org.

March 22-April 7 ‘The Ghost of Splinter Cove’

Children’s Theatre of Charlotte at ImaginOn 300 E. 7th St., Charlotte 7:30 p.m. Friday; 11 a.m. and 3 p.m.

Saturday; 2 p.m. Sunday Sensory-friendly performance 4 p.m. Sunday, March 31 Companion piece to Actor’s Theatre of Charlotte’s “The Great Beyond.” The two stories take place in a single house, with

“The Great Beyond” focusing on the adults on the home’s main floor while “The Ghost of Splinter Cove” follows the children of the family and what they discover in the basement on the same fateful night.

Recommended for ages 8 and up. Tickets $20-$27. Please note there will be no afternoon performance on Saturday, April 6. ctcharlotte.org.

March 22-April 7 ‘Terms of Endearment’

Theatre Charlotte 501 Queens Rd., Charlotte 7:30 p.m. Wednesday-Thursday; 8 p.m.

Friday-Saturday; 2:30 p.m. Sunday A mother and daughter share a complex relationship filled with humor and heart in the stage adaptation of the bestselling novel and Oscar-winning film of the same name.

Tickets $28. Rated PG-13. Please note the show will not be performed on March 27. theatrecharlotte.org.

March 23 ‘Buddies’ Film Screening

Wake Forest University Porter Byrum Welcome Center 1834 Wake Forest Rd., Winston-Salem 7 p.m.

OUT at the Movies, in partnership with Wake Forest University, Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center and Positive Wellness Alliance, presents a free screening of “Buddies.” The film is a re-release of Arthur J. Bressan, Jr.’s final film, the first feature film about AIDS. ‘Buddies” actor David Schachter and the director’s sister, Roe Bressan, will be in attendance for the screening, a Q & A session (moderated by Dr. Scott Rhodes,) and reception. RSVP to 336-918-0902 or outatthemoviesfest@gmail.com. outathemovieswinston.com.

March 25 Charlotte LGBTQ Elders Herstory Month Celebration

Time Out Youth 3800 Monroe Rd., Charlotte 7-9 p.m.

Charlotte LGBTQ Elders’ latest program celebrates Women’s Herstory Month by honoring women who played pivotal roles in establishing and growing Charlotte’s LGBTQ community. Gatherings are geared toward participants ages 55 and up, but people of all ages are welcome to attend, as are

March 17: Hozier

The ‘Take Me to Church’ singer takes his “Wasteland, Baby!” tour to the Queen City.

Tickets start at $107. Ovens Auditorium, 2700 E. Independence Blvd., Charlotte. 8 p.m. livenation.com/artists/124116/hozier. allies and advocates. Admission is free and advance registration is available online. bit.ly/EldersHerstory.

March 31 6th Annual LGBTQ Wedding Expo

Raleigh Marriott City Center 500 Fayetteville St., Raleigh 12:30-3:30 p.m.

LGBTQ-inclusive wedding and travel vendors come together for an event that describes itself as the region’s only one of its kind.

Raffles and one-day specials round out this year’s “Same Love, Same Rights” themed expo. All budgets are welcome. Admission is free with online advance registration. bit.ly/LGBTQWeddingExpo.

April 5-7 ‘Tosca’

Memorial Hall at Duke Energy Center for the Performing Arts 2 E. South St., Raleigh 7:30 p.m. Friday’ 2 p.m. Sunday North Carolina Opera invites patrons to experience Puccini’s acclaimed melodrama in a new production. Performed in the original Italian with projected English supertitles. Tickets $23-$99. ncopera.org.

March 8-21, 2019

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March 8-21, 2019