QNotes, April 6, 2018

April 6-19 . 2018

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inside

qnotes news & features

4 Gov. Cooper & HB2 arts. entertainment. news. views.

5 March For Our Lives Charlotte 6 News Notes: Regional Briefs 8 News Notes: U.S./World Briefs 9 UNCC LGBTQ Petition 9 Cishet Allies — Do Better 10 Carolinas LGBTQ Youth Resources 11 Growing Out of the Closet 11 Keep Our State Straight - Poetry 13 Dear Black Gay Boy - Poetry 13 National LGBTQ Youth Resources

Gov. Roy Çooper praised the repeal of HB2 and feels that it is a driver of economic growth .

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Betsy DeVos, as played by Kate McKinnon, says, arts. entertainment. news. views.

‘In North Carolina: Stop being trans!’

Mar. 19 - goqnotes.com/58905

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Councilmember LaWana Mayfield stirs up confusion, upset with tweet on outing politicians on Grindr Mar. 20 - goqnotes.com/58940

more news & features …

a&e / life&style

16 17 18 21 22 24

Out in Print Good as Gold Dishing with Buff Faye Tell Trinity Q Events Calendar Our People: Amy Glaser

opinions & views

15 Gay Olympians 15 Spiritual Reflections

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online

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HB2/HB142 Update

Comedian who said he’d kill a trans woman if ‘manipulated’ into sex comes to Charlotte Mar. 25 - goqnotes.com/59131 March For Our Lives

Out Olympian Importance

The community comes together to voice its opinion and stand against gun violence. page 5

Key messages to inspire while heroes help give public face to youth, others page 15

Take the annual LGBTQ survey to help the community Mar. 27 - goqnotes.com/59150

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HB2/HB142 Update

Gov. Cooper praises repeal of HB2 as driver of economic growth on one year anniversary The boycotts have largely ended, but the discrimination continues

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff

April 6-19, 2018 Vol 32 No 25

arts. entertainment. news. views. goqnotes.com twitter.com/qnotescarolinas facebook.com/qnotescarolinas

contributors this issue

Buff Faye, Rev. Mary Frances Comer, Torie Dominguez, Alex Donatelli, Erin Batten-Hicks, Jhonathan Hill, Stan Kimer, Brianna Leahy, Lainey Millen, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Gregg Shapiro, Jeff Taylor, Trinity

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The focus of QNotes is to serve the LGBTQ and straight ally communities of the Charlotte region, North Carolina and beyond, by featuring arts, entertainment, news and views content in print and online that directly enlightens, informs and engages the readers about LGBTQ life and social justice issues.

Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc., dba QNotes P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222 ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Sales: x201 adsales@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, ph 212.242.6863 Managing Editor: Jim Yarbrough, x201, editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Editor: Lainey Millen, specialassignments@goqnotes.com Social Media Editor: Jeff Taylor, jeff@goqnotes.com Copy Editor: Torie Dominguez, torie@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x205, production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.

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Gov. Roy Cooper speaks at Duke University

DURHAM, N.C. — North Carolina Gov. Roy Cooper spoke with Politico writers Jake Sherman and Anna Palmer on March 29 at Duke University, where he outlined his priorities going forward.

He said he intends to invest in public education, secure Amazon’s second headquarters for Raleigh, and see his party win back the North Carolina General Assembly.

Cooper talked up the repeal of House Bill 2, which was a compromise in the form of House Bill 142, which kept much of the same discrimination in place. Bathroom policies as well as non-discrimination ordinances still must pass through the General Assembly. The Republican party currently holds a supermajority in both the House and Senate.

Of securing headquarters in the state, Cooper said “we are very much in the running not only for Amazon, but for a lot of companies, especially on the West coast, technology companies that are looking to establish their HQ2’s, and their second headquarters. And North Carolina is definitely in the running for that, and I think we are one of the places that Amazon would strongly consider, and will strongly consider.”

Raleigh has already made it onto the shortlist of possible cities where Amazon might place its second headquarters, and when asked when he expected to hear from the company, Cooper said he didn’t know.

“They are on their own timeline,” he said.

“I do know this, had we not repealed House Bill 2, we would not even be in the discussion,” he added, to applause.

“But we have more work to do in the area of fighting discrimination

and encouraging diversity,” he continued. “I think diversity is one of our strengths in North Carolina. I’ve issued one of the strongest executive orders that require that all of our state employees (not discriminate against) the LGBTQ community. Also, we can’t contract with companies that don’t provide those protections, this is part of that executive order.”

“And our goal needs to be statewide anti-discrimination protections,” he continued. “A lot of these companies are talking to me and relying on me to make sure we continue to move North Carolina in the right direction of fighting discrimination, showing the inclusive state that we know we are, the diverse state that we know we are, but that some of our leaders took us off the rails (from being).”

Cooper added that there was some level of concern about coming to North Carolina, but said companies are encouraged by the developments taking place in the state.

“We’re the number one state in the country with women in the tech force, and with all of our HBCU’s [historically black colleges and universities] and our great diversity, we provide that workforce for these companies. They know that,” he added.

LGBTQ rights advocates have been urging the company to avoid North Carolina, along with other states without sufficient laws protecting LGBTQ rights, with a campaign called “No Gay? No Way!” Watch the discussion in the video online at goqnotes.com/59225.

The topic of diversity and the HB2 repeal comes at around the six minute mark. : :

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Save Our Youth

Scenes from the Charlotte March For Our Lives rally against gun violence Rallies are taking part across the globe to call for stronger gun control in America

by Jeff Taylor :: qnotes staff CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Hundreds of demonstrators took to Marshall Park in Charlotte, N.C. and then marched through Uptown, as part of the March For Our Lives rallies taking place around the globe to protest against gun violence and for stricter gun control laws.

The rally was organized by local youth leaders, and included individuals of all ages, who brought signs, made speeches, chanted, and otherwise made their voices heard on the issue.

Here are some of the sights from the rally. To see more plus videos, visit goqnotes.com/59121.

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news notes: carolinas compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

MeckPAC reception upcoming CHARLOTTE, N.C. — MeckPAC will hold “Tap into the Primaries,” its 2018 Spring reception and endorsements release, on April 10, 6:30 p.m., at Heist Brewery, 2902 N. Davidson St. Sen. Jeff Jackson has been tapped as the event’s special guest speaker, discussing this year’s historic elections and their importance for the county and state.

Light hors d’oeuvres and a cash bar will be provided. Attendees will be able to mingle with candidates running for office this year.

RSVPs and contributions are being accepted online at bit. ly/2GMqLFr or at the door.

Suggested contribution begins at $50. Contributions at the $100, $300 and $500 level receive drink tickets and admission to MeckPAC’s 20th Anniversary event in the fall.

“Your generous contribution at any level will ensure the election of pro-equality candidates across all our local offices and in Mecklenburg County’s state legislative delegation,” organizers shared. “This year’s midterm elections are among the most competitive in history, with candidates filing for nearly every office up and down the ballot.”

Suggested contributions range from $50-$1,000 North Carolina Sen. Jeff Jackson will be and those at $100 and above include perks. the guest speaker at MeckPAC’s ‘Tap into info: meckpac.org. the Primaries.’

Charlotte ‘Screenagers’ to be screened

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Northwest School of the Arts Parent Teacher Organization in partnership with CMS “Making It Better” will show the film “Screenagers: Growing Up in The Digital Age,” on April 26, 7 p.m., in the the schools’s new theatre located at 1415 Beatties Ford Rd. This encore performance is in response to public demand following the first showing in February that sold out in hours. “This is such a hot topic for families that we felt another showing would be beneficial for our CMS families” said Charlotte Mecklenburg Schools Specialist for Bullying Prevention John Concelman.

“Screenagers” is the first feature documentary to explore the impact of screen technology on kids and offer parents and families proven solutions that work. What started out as a personal story for one has grown into a national movement, helping millions of teens and their families navigate growing up in a world with instant access to screens. A discussion panel will follow the film.

Reservations do not guarantee entry, even with a ticket in hand. Entry is first come, first served, so attendees are encouraged to arrive early. Due to the fact that tickets are complimentary, the school expects a large number of no-shows. Tickets are non-transferable and can only be used by the individual who reserved them. Tickets are free, but a $5 per person donation is suggested. All donations go to Friends of NWSA PTO. Tickets can be reserved at goo.gl/t3zy2b. info: schools.cms.k12.nc.us/northwestHS/ Pages/Default.aspx.

‘Mermaid’ gets world premiere

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — David Valdes Greenwood’s “The Mermaid Hour” will get a

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April 6-19 . 2018

three-city National New Play Network Rolling World Premiere when it begins performances simultaneously in three U.S. cities — Charlotte, N.C., Portland, Ore. and Tuscon, Ari. In Charlotte, the staging will take place from April 26-May 19 at the Actor’s Theatre at Queens University’s Hadley Theater, 2132 Radcliffe Ave. The storyline follows transgender teen Violet as she navigates life along with her parents and friends.

Performance dates and times are: April 26, 7:30 p.m., pay what you can; April 27-28 (preview), May 4-5, May 11-12, May 18-19, 8 p.m.; May 2 (opening), May 3, May 9-10, May 16-17, 7:30 p.m.; and May 6, May 13, 2:30 p.m.

Tickets range from $25-$44 and are available online at bit.ly/2q1vb0P. info: atcharlotte.org.

Happening slated for May

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Charlotte Lesbian and Gay Fund will hold its 11th Annual Happening luncheon on May 16, 12 p.m., at The Westin Charlotte, 601 S. College St. The event brings community members together to raise awareness, as well as showcasing the fund’s 2018 grant recipients.

Networking opportunities begin at 11:15 a.m.

Currently, the fund is seeking table captains who commit to filling a table of 10. The cost is $425 and those interested can sign up and purchase the table reservation online at bit. ly/2J917cm.

Individual tickets are available for purchase for $45 online at bit.ly/2InMTmR. In other news, the fund has invited the community on April 19, 5:30 p.m., to Vivace, 1100 Metropolitan Ave. #100 for its Bi-Annual Spring After Work Meet Up. Light snacks will be provided along with a cash bar.

The fund is a program of the Foundation for the Carolinas which serves a 13-county region in North and South Carolina. The foundation

recently announced another record-breaking year of philanthropic activity. In addition to $2.5 billion in assets — up from $2 billion just a year ago — grants to non-profits reached $420 million. Both marks set records for the organization, which is currently celebrating its 60th anniversary.

Contributions to charitable funds held by the foundation were the second-highest in its history at $550 million. The foundation’s assets make it the sixth largest community foundation in the country, while its 2017 grantmaking and contributions figures place it at number two. info: fftc.org/clgf.

Triangle Biz network welcomes Stein

RALEIGH, N.C. — The Raleigh Business and Professional Network will hold its monthly meeting on April 11, 6 p.m., at 18 Seaboard Restaurant, 18 Seaboard Ave. #100.

Guest speaker will be North Carolina Attorney General Josh Stein.

Attendees can enjoy a cocktail hour, cash bar and a buffet dinner.

Reservations are being taken online. For more information, email info@raleighnetwork.org. info: raleighnetwork.org.

Center celebrates anniversary

CHAPEL HILL, N.C. — The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill’s LGBTQ Center will celebrate its 15th anniversary on April 14, 10 a.m., at Weathervane Restaurant, 201 S. Estes Dr. Participants will be able to enjoy a drag brunch, celebration and fundraiser.

Alumni, current students and friends are invited to attend.

Pre-registration is required and is available online at bit.ly/2IoWkm1. A suggested contribution of $20-$100 at the door or during the event from all but current students will be appreciated. info: 919-843-5376. lgbtq@unc.edu.

Students demand equality

DURHAM, N.C. — Earlier this year, LGBTQ students led the charge to demand justice for LGBTQ students at Duke Divinity School by interrupting Dean Elaine Heath’s State of the School Address.

The students presented an alternative vision for Duke Divinity, said a blog post to Making the House of Love, a group of LGBTQ students and allies who work toward a safer school.

“We’re tired of making the Divinity School’s image look good, while no one has cut us a check for advertisement. We’re tired of all of the marginalized identities publicized on the websites but minimized in the school hallways.

We’re tired of our demands not being met,” the address stated.

In its demands it called for immediate and short- and long-term changes, including the addition of a “queer theology course” which the school’s administration pushed back against.

“We have been disrespected, mistreated, tokenized, marginalized, and ignored. We make up an integral part of this community, and yet our needs remain deliberately unheard. We are fed up, and we are demanding change,” the post continued.

Duke Divinity School Photo Credit: Public Domain

Some of the demands were: faculty and staff allies listed on the OUTDuke website; implementation of a non-discrimination policy; mandatory gender and sexuality training for staff and faculty; need-based scholarships for queer or transgender female students of color in specific tracks; queer affirming spiritual formation leaders and spiritual formation retreats; and hiring of transgender staff and faculty.

The Independent Weekly reported that students complained that “the school advertises racial diversity and highlights its gay and queer students.” But Presbyterian minister Mary Fulkerson, theology professor and advisor to the campus group Sacred Worth which seeks to increase awareness of LGBTQ issues in the Methodist church, said that the course she teaches, Sexuality: Bible, Church and Controversy, is opaque and seeks to not offend Methodist students. The Methodist church does not ordain those who are gay and lesbian.

Student Nicole Williams described the school’s culture as one of a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. “At times, Duke Divinity School can seem like this isolated place from the greater university,” The Independent Weekly added.

In contrast, the Wake Forest School of Divinity openly and completely supports its LGBTQ students, despite its ties to the Baptist church. info: bit.ly/2pZveKO.

Triangle welcomes ‘We Are 1’

DURHAM, N.C. — The We Are 1 Conference 2018 will be held from April 25-29 at the Hilton Durham, 3800 Hillsborough Rd. The event is presented by the Infinity Diamond Club and it is celebrating the conference’s 10th anniversary.

The I Am empowerment conference includes receptions, seminars, services, PraiseFest, parties, vendor fair, pep rally and a formal gala and special events.

Early registration is now open online and goes through April 14 at $269/general and $199/seniors 65 plus. Tickets for other conference events can be purchased individually. For those who wish to do so, a “pay it forward” scholarship fund contribution option is available.

Imani Metropolitan Community Church will be part of the Praise Fest Choir at the Praise Fest Service with Bishop Yvette Flunder on April 26 at 7:30 p.m. The event is free and open to the public. info: weare1conference.com.

Western College to mount local writer’s play

FLAT ROCK, N.C. — Blue Ridge Community College (BRCC) will bring “Stories from the Table” to the stage from April 12-15 in the Patton Auditorium at the school’s theatre.

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Each performance will have a different theme and celebration in order to accommodate all of the community’s resources. Showtimes and themes are April 12, 7 p.m., Healthcare Resource Fair; April 13, 7 p.m., Pride Night; April 14, 2 p.m., Family Focus and 7 p.m., Economic Empowerment; and April 15, 2 p.m., Housing.

Organizations such as WNC AIDS Project and PFLAG will set up tables to disseminate inforBlue Ridge Community College is staging North Carolina writer mation, as well as participate and faculty member Joshua Bledsoe’s ‘Stories from the Table.’ in discussions on a variety of The play is written by faculty member thematic topics.

Joshua Bledsoe, a Human Rights Campaign Tickets are $5 for BRCC faculty, staff, 2015 Equality Award winner, and BRCC stustudents, and group sales. All other tickets will dents. Based on true stories from Henderson be $7.

County’s citizens, the play’s purpose is to raise For reservations, call Treadway at 828-694awareness of the local homeless and low1849 or email js_treadway@blueridge.edu. income community. It includes young LGBTQ info: blueridge.edu. adults who face homelessness and the struggle of being transgender in a rural community.

Seniors get social Bledsoe has worked closely with the ASHEVILLE, N.C. — The Asheville Lesbian cast and Jennifer Treadway, the head of the Seniors Group is all set for warmer weather with theater department, to create a one of a kind a host of gatherings to welcome the sunshine. production in order to reenact the daily lives The group will meet for its April 15 brunch of one’s neighbors. at 1 p.m., at Bonefish Grill, 105 C River Hills Rd. The production follows Kevin, a former star RSVPs are requested by April 12 and can be high school athlete, who finds himself suddenly sent to sandralfrith@gmail.com. homeless due to addiction. Kevin visits The The other 2018 brunch dates are: May 20, Center, a place that provides a warm meal for 12 p.m., Roux in the Hilton at Biltmore Park, 43 those in need, where he develops a clarity Town Square Blvd.; July 15, 1 p.m., Seasons, about his own life, as well as finds empathy for 87 Lily Pad Ln., Flat Rock, N.C.; Sept. 16, 1 p.m., the others he encounters.

Strada, 27 Broadway St.; Oct. 21, 1 p.m., Post

25, 2155 Hendersonville Rd., Arden, N.C.; and Nov. 18, 12 p.m., Roux in the Hilton at Biltmore Park, 43 Town Square Blvd.

Then as things heat up, the seniors will hit the outdoors for two picnics. On June 17, 11:30 a.m., participants will meet at Owen Park Swannanoa, shelter two and enjoy a potluck.

Contributions are being sought for the cost of shelter rental but are not required. Then on Aug. 19 at 1 p.m., the crew heads out to Lake Julian Park. More details will follow. info: sandralfrith@gmail.com.

Regional Retreat proposals form open

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Freedom Center for Social Justice has announced that its Transgender Faith and Action Network Retreat call for proposals form is live.

The retreat will be held from Aug. 16-19 at the Montreat Conference Center, 401 Assembly Dr., in Montreat, N.C. The event affords an affirming space for participants to network, decompress, heal, engage and collaborate together.

“We are looking for trans educators, artists, healers and more to join us in leading (and participating in) workshops, panels and cultural programming,” center program coordinator Sam Poler said. One does not have to be a professional. Volunteers are welcome to provide a movie night, read queer love stories together, give manicures, discuss Holy text, host a makeup tutorial session, take selfies in the forest and more.

“The retreat is all about intentionality this year. We want this space to be by and for

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trans folks. What do you want to do? What do you want to experience? What do you want to feel, learn, teach, witness? We’re not looking for conference-style sessions, we’re looking to hold space for the varied offerings that you bring,” Poler added. The retreat also needs conference sessions and submissions are encouraged.

For more information, email Poler at samp@ fcsj.org. info: fcsj.org.

Tri-Cities nets new LGBTQ org

JOHNSON CITY, Tenn. — TriPrideTN, which was formed in October 2017, is gearing up for its first annual TriPride Parade and Festival on Sept. 15, Go Tri Cities reported.

The event will be the culmination of volunteer efforts to bring a more inclusive, visible presence to the area. It “aims to celebrate the LGBTQ community and welcome their allies, supportive non-profit organizations, faith congregations and local businesses.”

The TriPrideTN name includes the Tri-Cities area (comprised of Johnson City, Kingsport, Tenn., Bristol, Tenn., Bristol, Va., in addition to Southwest Virginia).

Go Tri Cities reported that after taking a look at the LGBTQ Pride festivals and progress made in Nashville, Knoxville and Asheville, N.C., founder George Chamoun asked, “If they can do it, why can’t we?” info: gotricities.com. tripridetn.org.

Have news or other information? Send your press releases and updates for inclusion in our News Notes: editor@goqnotes.com.

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news notes: u.s./world compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

Conversion therapy bans sweeping U.S.

QUICK HITS —————————————————————————————— Character actress and filmmaker Giovannie Espiritu will be speaking on April 6 during a filmmaking panel at ClexaCon, a multi-fandom media and entertainment event for LGBTQ women and their allies. info: clexacon.com.

In recognition of his transgender sister’s death and to honor her life, Detroit Pistons forward Reggie Bullock hosted an LGBTQ Pride Night. info: ble.ac/2Ea5nEK. former Missy Elliott back-up dancer and star of “Camp Rock” and “Cheaper by the Dozen,” has come out as bisexual. info: bit.ly/2pVo9LR.

Conversion therapy ban locations Illustration Credit: SPQRobin and Jedi Friend via Wikimedia Commons.

CC BY SA 3.0 License

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Ten states and Washington, D.C. have outlawed conversion therapy, and four bans were signed into law by governors, signaling a growing bipartisan consensus, The Victory Fund said.

Most recently, Washington Gov. Jay Inslee signed into law SB 5722, legislation that protects LGBTQ youth from the fraudulent, harmful and debunked practice of “conversion therapy.” The bill signing was the result of targeted grassroots advocacy efforts by the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) and Equal Rights Washington.

Sometimes referred to as “ex-gay therapy,” “reparative therapy,” or “sexual orientation change efforts,” conversion therapy consists of harmful practices that attempt to change an individual’s sexual orientation or gender identity via physical or cognitive behavioral techniques, NCLR stated. “Conversion therapy has been shown to lead to higher instances of depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and even suicide, leading these practices to be condemned by every major medical and mental health organization in the United States, including the American Psychological Association,” it added.

Joining Washington in the effort was Milwaukee, Wis. The municipality was the first in the state to establish protections for youth from conversion therapy. The Human Rights Campaign and Fair Wisconsin, the statewide

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group working to advance equality for LGBTQ Wisconsinites, praised the Milwaukee Common Council for passing the measure. The ordinance prohibits licensed mental health professionals from engaging in conversion therapy with minors and carries a civil penalty for each violation.

A growing number of municipalities across the country, including cities in Arizona, New York, Pennsylvania, Ohio and Florida, have enacted similar crucial protections. Connecticut, California, the District of Columbia, Illinois, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, Rhode Island, and Vermont all have laws or regulations protecting youth from this abusive practice, the Human Rights Campaign shared.

Maryland State Sen. Rich Madaleno, who is running for governor of the state, introduced a bill to ban conversion therapy which was approved by the Senate and now heads to the House of Delegates under separate sponsorship by representatives there, The Victory Fund said.

Republican Gov. Larry Hogan supports the bill.

According to a recent report by the Williams Institute at the University of California, Los Angeles School of Law, an estimated 20,000 LGBTQ minors in states without protections will be subjected to conversion therapy by a licensed healthcare professional if state lawmakers fail to act. : : info: nclrights.org. hrc.org. victoryfund.org. williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu.

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Georges Azzi, executive director of Arab Foundation for Freedoms and Equality, will accept the OutRight Action International Felipe de Souza Award at the Celebration of Courage 2018 on May 14. info: outrightinternational.org.

Noor Salman, the wife of Pulse Nightclub gunman Omar Mateen who killed 49 people, was acquitted of providing material support to a foreign terrorist organization and of obstruction of justice in connection with her husband’s 2016 rampage, CNN reported. info: cnn.it/2IgJW7u.

On April 28 San Diego, Calif. LGBTQservice organizations will host a conference, “#MeTooLGBTQ,” to increase culturally competent services in San Diego County for victims and survivors of sexual violence who identify as LGBTQ. info: sdpride.org.

Equality Index, which scores healthcare facilities on policies and practices dedicated to the equitable treatment and inclusion of their LGBTQ patients, visitors and employees. info: bit.ly/2J9FWHf. Super Deluxe is teaming with writers and producers Stan Zimmerman and James Berg to develop the gay senior citizen comedy series “Silver Foxes.” info: bit.ly/2Jc7L1t.

University of Tennessee alumni have raised $3 million to endow the school’s Pride Center which had been defunded by the state’s legislature. info: bit.ly/2pzvhg9.

A Chicago Tribune commentary spoke about the loss of Craigslist personal ads as an important LGBTQ space. info: trib.in/2pX95wG. Indiewire published a story that showed how Hollywood’s gay double standard worked — actresses come out, but young actors stay in the closet. info: bit.ly/2GXUFV0.

Open Circle Unitarian Universalist Fellowship in Fond Du Lac, Wis. presented a program to further understanding about homophobia and other barriers to sports inclusion. info: outsports.com.

The National Association of Gay and Lesbian Real Estate Professionals will hold its second annual LGBT Housing Policy Summit at the Human Rights Campaign Equality Center on April 18 in Washington, D.C. info: naglrep.com.

A high school senior has successfully planned a gay Pride festival in Columbus, Ind., the hometown of anti-gay Vice President Mike Pence. The event is slated for April 14. info: bit.ly/2GsqAvH.

Donna Christensen, M.D., a former congressional delegate from the U.S. Virgin Islands, has joined the board of The Black AIDS Institute. info: blackaids.org.

Forbes Magazine detailed three ways that LGBTQ investors can resist the Trump Administration: invest in LGBTQ-supportive companies, invest time and money in local LGBTQ advocacy organizations and patronize LGBTQ-owned businesses. info: bit.ly/2EbOnOr.

Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund will hold their Transgender Advocacy Awards on June 12 in New York, N.Y. info: transgenderlegal.org.

The Human Rights Campaign Foundation released the 11th edition of its annual Healthcare

GLAAD announced that Emmy nominee Samira Wiley will be honored at the 29th Annual GLAAD Media Awards in New York, N.Y. on May 5. info: glaad.org.

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LGBTQ Youth

UNC Charlotte students petition for LGBTQ resource center Hundreds sign in support of facility to serve students, local community

by Torie Dominguez :: torie@goqnotes.com Early in the evening of Wednesday, March 21, two young people walked into the iconic White Rabbit store on Central Ave. They browsed the shelves of rainbow stickers and racks of pride flags, the jewelry displays and party favors, and as they approached the counter with their selections, one said quietly to the other, “you might as well ask…”

They were shy but determined. They were students at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte (UNCC), and they had helped to start a petition in favor of establishing an official LGBTQ community center on campus. As they explained, their youthful selfconsciousness fading in the face of deeply felt enthusiasm for their cause, they began to speak with more confidence. They wondered if there was any way White Rabbit could somehow publicly endorse their proposal. One reported excitedly that the petition stood only eight signatures away from an even thousand. Their companion, who hadn’t realized they were quite that close, was overjoyed.

After the two students went on their way, a quick look at their change.org page (“UNCC Needs an LGBTQ Center”) revealed a count still rising steadily. It hit that coveted 1,000 mark within minutes.

So why the need for, as the petition describes it, an LGBTQIA Resource Center? It’s simple. Community, education…and fear. UNCC Spectrum, the multicultural student or-

ganization behind the project, in its official university profile goes beyond discussing advocacy for the LGBTQ population to declare “It will be a safe place for all people.”

In their public appeal they cite statistics which suggest that there could be thousands of UNCC students who identify as LGBTQ and as many as one in five of those may feel that their safety is at risk while on campus. Spectrum further draws attention to the murders of Charlotte area residents Sherrell Faulkner and Derricka Banner, both transgender women of color — a demographic whose members have repeatedly been shown to be victims of violent crime at an alarming and wholly disproportionate rate — and highlight the 2015 death of UNCC student Blake Brockington. The 18-year-old transgender activist, who made history as East Mecklenburg High School homecoming king and went on to lead community initiatives working to defeat transphobia, racism, violence and police brutality, committed suicide on March 23 of that year. The tragic end of his inspiring life sparked a national and international outcry.

That microcosm-like dynamic, in which the brutality and alienation suffered by LGBTQ people in the wider world are mirrored in experiences on campus, has convinced Spectrum and its supporters that what’s urgently needed is not only a student center, but a resource for the community at large. They can only hope that ambition has not been dealt an entirely devastating

blow by the recent departure of their faculty advisor. Teacher and assistant director of sexuality and sexual health Joshua Burford was “the only staffed liaison between LGBT students and upperlevel administration,” and the petition’s organizers lament that in his absence they have been left with “no one to advocate on behalf of queer and transgender students and staff.”

Indeed, it has been suggested by some in the Charlotte queer community that, while the sincerity of Burford’s desire to pursue a groundbreaking queer archiving project in his native Alabama is beyond question, it was reaching a tipping point in his frustration over administrative heel-dragging that gave him the final motivation he needed in order to leave.

The UNCC LGBTQIA Resource Center initiative may have lost its most highly placed champion, but its student leaders can perhaps take heart from the diversity of backers that remain, and whose support they’ve won through their own efforts. “I’m signing,” writes one supporter, “because I am an NC high school student who is considering attending UNCC, and I would like to attend a school that is safe for people like me.” Another signatory is an alumna; another is a current adjunct professor. And the petition isn’t limited to those with a specific connection to the university. It can be signed by members of the public as well, and many are already on board.

Speaking to qnotes staffer Jeff Taylor back in January, in a discussion focused on his then-imminent southward migration, Burford revealed that “[UNC Charlotte] administrators told him the [resource center] project was ‘dead in the water.’” As of March 30, should those two kids who stepped out onto the Central Ave. sidewalk the previous week thrilled about 992 signatures check out their petition site, they will find they were up to 1,456. Whether that’s what Chancellor Philip L. Dubois, Provost Joan Lorden, Vice-Chancellor Kevin Bailey, Dean Christine Reed Davis and their colleagues consider “dead in the water” remains to be seen. : :

LGBTQ Youth

Cishet Allies — Do Better Understanding some simple rules

by Alex Donatelli, Charlotte, N.C. :: youth guest contributor

A

s a queer, gender non-conforming individual, life can sometimes be exhausting. Quite frankly, some people really do not know how to be respectful of the LGBTQ community and offer helpful support. So, in the spirit of Dua Lipa, I would like to propose some “new rules” for cisgender heterosexual people regarding how they interact with the LGBTQ community. I would like to add that I do not speak for all LGBTQ people, and not everyone may agree that these “rules” are the most important, or even that I explained them correctly at all. I would also like to clarify that none of these rules are actually new — but the majority of people still do not follow them. Without further ado, here are my three “new rules” for cis straight people: 1. Do not be offended if someone thinks you are gay/trans/etc.

Please ask yourself — why are you so upset? Reacting negatively reinforces the idea that being queer is undesirable.

The time has long passed for people to unlearn their internal adversity towards queer and trans people. If you can’t even fathom someone mistaking you for [being an] LGBTQ [person] — then how are you treating those who actually are? Check in with yourself and address the root of your intolerance.

2. Parents: it is not enough to “tolerate” your child.

Go a step further, and undeniably accept and support your child. If you wish your child were cisgender or heterosexual, that

is not good enough. If you want to change your child’s identity, then you have not fully accepted them, and quite frankly want to eliminate a huge part of what makes them who they are. I do not want to change who I am, even if it would make my life “easier,” so you shouldn’t either.

3. Please chill out at Pride.

I am not saying that cisgender, heterosexual people cannot attend Pride — all I am saying is that I wish they wouldn’t make it all about themselves. Part of being an ally is knowing when to step up, and more importantly, when to take a step back. If you want to show your support, that’s fantastic, but don’t speak over queer and trans people or go without a purpose. Before attending Pride, ask yourself: do you understand the modern struggles of LGBTQ people? What about the historical struggles? Do you know how Pride started? What do you do to actively support the community — especially its most vulnerable? Do you support all LGBTQ people — or just the ones that are attractive to you? If any of your answers are no — consider educating yourself before you sport a rainbow bikini with your gal pals for a photo op at an event that started as a means to liberate queer and trans people. Pride was not started as a “celebration for everyone to love who they love”— it was an act of protest against the oppression that LGBTQ people face. : :

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LGBTQ Youth

Carolinas resources provide safety net for LGBTQ youth It’s all about support, friendship, a safe haven and community service opportunities

A

cross the Carolinas, LGBTQ youth are afforded the opportunity to gather with their peers and to receive valuable support from adults. Listed here are organizations that are geared to provide support and more to the LGBTQ youth population.

•••••

Gay-Straight Alliance Network For students, gay-straight alliances have been a key component in making an uncomfortable situation more palatable. Not only are GSAs front and center for them while they are engaged in their academic endeavors, but they provide a social outlet as well. gsanetwork.org.

Gay-Straight Alliance Network contacts for both North and South Carolina are: Time Out Youth GSA Network Charlotte, N.C. timeoutyouth.org.

South Carolina GSA Network Columbia, S.C. scequality.org.

These two organizations will also have other youth-related resources available for those who seek other options.

Delta Youth The mission of Delta Youth is to improve the lives of queer youth in Alamance, Durham and Orange counties by improving physical and emotional health outcomes; building individual financial and educational capacity; creating awareness and visibility within the community; and empowering youth to unapologetically exist in the world.

Founded in 2016 919-590-5566 deltayouthnc@gmail.com. deltayouth.org. iNSIDEoUT/Upsidedown/ The Cypher iNSIDEoUT is a youth-led (and youth-founded) organization by and for LGBTQI+ youth that strives to connect and support all LGBTQISAqueer individuals and groups. It also publishes Backwords, the official zine of iNSIDEoUT. Upsidedown creates space that is respectful of everyone, where youth 12 and younger who are gender non-conforming, transgender, or whatever else, can connect, have fun, and change the world.

The Cypher is a music support group for queer and allied youth of color. This group is a space for youth of color who are LGBTQ to be powerful and accepted.

Founded in 2011 P.O. Box 25429 Durham, NC 27702 919-923-7884 insideoutamy@gmail.com.

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insideout180.org. upsidedown180.org. insideout180.org/thecypher.

LGBT Center of Raleigh The LGBT Center of Raleigh’s Youth Initiative works to support, engage and empower LGBTQ+ youth in North Carolina. It includes the Youth Coffee House (confidential meeting space), ASPYRE (leadership camp), Queer NC (service work) and TpartE (transgender youth meeting space), among other support services.

324 S. Harrington St. Raleigh NC 27603 919-832-4484 nbuchser@lgbtcenterofraleigh.com. lgbtcenterofraleigh.com/programs/ youth-programs.html.

North Carolina H.E.A.T. (Heroes Emerging Among Teens) NC HEAT is a youth-led organization that uses peer education and organizing campaigns to advocate for youth liberation by defending schools against destructive cutbacks, privatization and austerity; organizing to end the school-to-prison pipeline; promote safety and security for LGBTQ students; and secure resources and equality for immigrant youth.

Founded in 2010 wakeyouth.wordpress.com/nc-h-e-a-t.

North Star LGBTQ Community Center North Star LGBTQ Community Center works to become a safe space for LGBTQ youth 24 and younger to get connected and empowered.

Its purpose is to build a strong queer youth community through education, creative and performing arts and community events such as its Alternative Prom (Alt Prom) and Middle School Spring Social.

930 Burke St. Winston-Salem, NC 27101 336-893-9053 info@northstarlgbtcc.com. northstarlgbtcc.com.

OUTright Youth of Catawba Valley OUTright Youth provides a unique, youthcentered, safe environment for LGBTQ youth ages 12-23, and their allies, to come together, receive unconditional support and make friends who understand who they are as they struggle with sexual orientation, gender identity and other issues.

Founded in 2010 748 4th St. SW. Hickory, NC 28602 828-320-1937 mdore@outrightyouthcv.org. outrightyouthcv.org.

QueerLab QueerLab, a program of Elsewhere Museum, is a youth-led media program explor-

Photo Credit: Rawpixel.com via Adobe Stock

by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

ing LGBTQ+ experiences in the Southeast and beyond. It publishes I Don’t Do Boxes annually since 2013.

606 S. Elm St. Greensboro, NC 27406 336-907-3271 museum@goelsewhere.org. goelsewhere.org.

208 Princess St. 2nd Floor Wilmington, NC 28401 910-538-0234 wilmingtonpride@gmail.com.

QORDS (Queer Oriented Radical Days of Summer) QORDS is a camp that empowers Southern queer youth and builds community through music and the arts.

Founded in 2012 P.O. Box 1328 Durham, NC 27702 919-864-2215 qords@qords.org. qords.org.

Youth OUTLOUD Youth OUTLOUD, a program of the Harriet Hancock Center, gives LGBTQ high-schoolers between the ages of 14-19 years of age a safe and confidential environment that allows the youth to be who they are and to help them make friends with other LGBTQ Youth in the surrounding Midlands area.

Founded in 2008.

1108 Woodrow St. Columbia, SC 29205 803-771-7713 yol@harriethancockcenter.org. harriethancockcenter.org.

Time Out Youth Center Time Out Youth Center offers support, advocacy and opportunities for personal development and social interaction to LGBTQ youth ages 11-20.

Founded in 1991 3800 Monroe Rd. Charlotte, NC 28205 704-344-8335 info@timeoutyouth.org. timeoutyouth.org.

Youth OUTright WNC Youth OUTright WNC, Inc. is the only youth advocacy and leadership non-profit organization in Western North Carolina solely dedicated to empowering LGBTQIA+ youth ages 14-20.

Founded in 2009 P.O. Box 1893 Asheville, NC 28802 866-881-3721 info@youthoutright.org. youthoutright.org.

We Are Family We Are Family provides support, resources and leadership development opportunities to LGBTQI and straight ally youth.

Founded in 1995 P.O. Box 21806 Charleston, SC 29413 843-637-9379 info@waf.org. waf.org.

YouthSAFE YouthSAFE is a Greensboro, N.C.-based organization providing an environment for LGBTQIA+ youth to find community, share resources and build skills for responding creatively to the world around them.

(Meeting Space) Higher Ground 210 E. Bessemer Ave. Greensboro, NC 27401 youthsafegso@gmail.com. youthsafegso.org.

Wilmington Pride Youth Group The Wilmington Pride Youth Group is a fun, safe, confidential space for teens to gather and discuss various LGBTQIA topics.

(Meeting Space) ReSpawn Wilmington

This list is not fully comprehensive and qnotes welcomes input so that the list provides accurate information and current resources to maintain its integrity. Email editor@goqnotes. com to make changes or additions.

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LGBTQ Youth

Growing Out of the Closet Reprinted with permission from Elsewhere/QueerLab’s ‘I Don’t Do Boxes’ 2017

by Brianna Leahy, Trinity, N.C. :: guest contributor

W

hen I was four, my cousin and I would play house. She was always the wife, and I was the husband. I didn’t want to be the wife, because I thought I’d have to wear a dress, and dresses were icky.

When I was seven, I kissed a girl for the first time and felt something I’d never felt before. My mother caught us, and screamed in my face.

I lied and said we were only playing, and I promptly forgot the feeling I had when I kissed her. The fear was too strong.

When I was eleven, I had a best friend who I loved very much. I didn’t know I loved her, but I knew a few things. She was smart, and beautiful, and the most amazing person I had ever met. She had a boyfriend. I hated him.

When I was eleven, I heard my stepmother (who I respected more than anyone) say, “Fags like that are going to hell.” I instantly became aware that being a “fag” was a bad thing in her eyes. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. Two of my best friends pulled a prank on us, telling our group that they were gay and dating. I called them several different slurs, and didn’t speak to them for days.

When I was eleven, I told my best friend I loved her for the first time.

Like a sister, of course.

When I was twelve, my best friend went to Europe for the summer.

In August, I called her house almost every day to ask if she was home yet. I had a picture of her as my phone background. I brought her a gift and gave it to her after her first time marching during a football game.

She broke up with her boyfriend. I was happy, until she started dating a sophomore. He was two years older than her. I had crushes on guys, but it was nothing compared to the intense feelings I had for my friend. I began writing in my diary about it, censoring certain words so my parents wouldn’t know if they read it. I hated myself for what I felt. I began to self harm. I retreated from my parents and their company. I began to act out in school, going so far as to get myself suspended.

I moved schools.

I thought, maybe, it would get easier if I couldn’t see her. Maybe I would start liking boys like I was supposed to. I tried to like boys, tried to flirt- but my heart was never in it. I moved schools again.

When I was 13, I met a boy named Tre. I started to date him a few weeks after we met. I think he knew that I was using him before I ever told him. I eventually came out, and was honest with my friends. My parents still didn’t know. I fell into a major depression, and I contemplated suicide. There was a major incident involving the police at one point. My eighth grade year is all a painful blur; I was bullied badly, my parents no longer understood me, and those who had once called me a friend were now threatening to kill me if I spoke to them. I was disgusting to them.

I’m now a senior in high school, and I have come a long way. It took a lot of work, a change of schools, and good friends who accepted me for who I am. My parents know now that I’m gay, and while it took a while, they’ve accepted it. More importantly, I’ve accepted myself. I still struggle with depression, and with those who try to bully them, but I don’t let them hinder me in my mission. I aim to become the best person I can possibly be. This fall, I will go to college, and begin my adult life as a proud and happy LGBT individual. : : I Don’t Do Boxes (IDDB) is an independent magazine produced by and for LGBTQ+ Southern youth during Elsewhere’s program QueerLab. Since 2013, QueerLab has provided a safer space to develop dialogue around LGBTQ+ experiences through youth-led multimedia projects and an annual ‘zine.

IDDB Issue No. 5: OutLaws celebrates cultural and political deviance, as well as our LGBTQ+ siblings who have been criminalized or erased all together.

For more information: idontdoboxes.org. goelsewhere.org/queerlab.

life

Keep Our State Straight Reprinted with permission from iNSIDEoUT’s ‘Backwords’ 2017

by Erin Batten-Hicks, North Carolina youth guest contributor

“Keep our state straight” Is among the things I hate It is said just to alienate People not born like you So now, the Department of Justice sues Yet, you still can’t take a clue That HB2, No different than Jim Crow, Is a new arbitrary low Somehow legally deeming transgender a foe.

All I can say is a blatant “no” To the Republican slime Who assume transgender people use the restroom, hearts intent on crime Now, with my catchy rhyme I emphasize that this not “love one’s neighbor” in it’s prime.

Instead of bathroom-banishing, Non-straight vanishing, Or gender examining, Let’s protect our sisters, Not just our cis-ters And regard our trans brothers Not as others.

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life

LGBTQ Youth

Dear Black Gay Boy Reprinted with permission from Elsewhere/QueerLab’s ‘I Don’t Do Boxes’ 2017

by Jhonathan Hill, Greensboro, N.C. :: guest contributor

Dear black gay boy You are… dramatic too over the top too colorful too involved Dear black gay boy you are life he opens up his lips and speaks to the air it listens

minority than you his range in numbers on the surface is few but in reality, it’s thousands still in hiding dear black gay boy you are variety curiosity at its best an army of many

Will you love him simply because he is black because he is gay because he is black and gay because he is more of a

don’t you see we rain hellfire on those who oppose us Dear black gay boy you are magic you create

every creative thing they have seen they can’t take you away for they would Die Dear black gay boy you are life My black GayNess will destroy you don’t you see I birth nations with the womb of my mind Dear black gay boy you are life and creation you sow the seed for this tree, they feed from

they’ll need you when you have the key to the questions​ they can’t answer

yet they still walk and stomp on you I tell them don’t hate the farmer don’t bite the hand that feeds you births you

drained of boredom and need a shock of entertainment

tells you, you’re pretty because you are don’t make us starve you of your confidence cause we will Dear black gay boy they need you

I Don’t Do Boxes (IDDB) is an independent magazine produced by and for LGBTQ+ Southern youth during Elsewhere’s program QueerLab. Since 2013, QueerLab has provided a safer space to develop dialogue around LGBTQ+ experiences through youth-led multimedia projects and an annual ‘zine.

IDDB Issue No. 5: OutLaws celebrates cultural and political deviance, as well as our LGBTQ+ siblings who have been criminalized or erased all together.

they can’t hurt you they’ll need you when they’re

For more information: idontdoboxes.org. goelsewhere.org/queerlab.

they’ll need you when the waters of their self-confidence drowns them

Dear black gay boy They need you!

LGBTQ Youth

National orgs offer a valuable lifeline for LGBTQ youth, allies, adults U.S. filled with viable options for impressionable, vulnerable youth

by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

L

GBTQ youth are always on the lookout for widespread support from the community at large. Across the nation, there are many organizations that serve as support systems and resources for youth, allies and adults.

In the continuing current negative political climate, the need for supportive groups for youth has never been more crucial. And, LGBTQ youth have specific needs both at home and at school, in addition to the world at large.

Listed here are some of those groups.

•••••

Regional PFLAG chapters are also an asset in helping the community to provide much-needed support and education for those who would otherwise lack the guidance and camaraderie so necessary when raising an LGBT child. They also serve as organizations that advocate for equal rights.

PFLAG chapters in North Carolina are: PFLAG Alamance, Elon, N.C. pflagalamance.org.

PFLAG Carteret & Craven Counties New Bern, N.C. ccnc-pflag.org.

PFLAG Charlotte, Charlotte, N.C. pflagcharlotte.org.

National Campus Pride National organization supporting secondary and post-secondary students. campuspride.org.

GLSEN Leading national education organization focused on ensuring safe schools for all students. glsen.org.

communicate to LGBTQ youth around the world that it gets better, and to create and inspire the changes needed to make it better for them. itgetsbetter.org.

LGBT Youth Allies An online resource that provides information on LGBTQ youth organizations nationwide. youthallies.com.

well as their allies. matthewsplace.com.

National Safe Place Program An outreach program designed to provide access to immediate help and safety for all youth in crisis. nationalsafeplace.org.

The Trevor Project Leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBTQ young people. thetrevorproject.org.

It Gets Better Project The It Gets Better Project’s mission is to

Matthew Shepard Foundation Matthew’s Place An online community designed to provide support to teens and young adults within sexual orientation and gender identity minorities as

PFLAG Concord/Kannapolis, Kannapolis, N.C. ckpflag@gmail.com.

PFLAG High Point, High Point, N.C facebook.com/pflag.highpoint.

PFLAG Winston-Salem, Winston Salem, N.C. pflagws.org.

PFLAG Fayetteville, Fayetteville, N.C. pflagfayetteville@gmail.com.

PFLAG Lenoir, Lenoir, N.C. pflagcaldwellcounty@gmail.com.

PFLAG chapter in South Carolina are:

PFLAG Flat Rock/Hendersonville Flat Rock, N.C. community.pflag.org/flatrockhendersonville.

PFLAG Raleigh-Durham/Triangle Durham, N.C. pflagtriangle.org.

PFLAG Gaston , Gastonia, N.C. pflaggaston.org.

PFLAG Rocky Mount , Rocky Mount, N.C. pflagrm@aol.com.

PFLAG Greensboro, Greensboro, N.C. pflaggreensboro.org.

PFLAG Salisbury/ Rowan, Salisbury, N.C. facebook.com/salisburyrowan.pflag.

PFLAG Greenville, Greenville, N.C. pflag@outgreenville.com.

PFLAG Wilmington/Cape Fear, Wilmington, N.C. pflagwilmingtonnc.org.

PFLAG Hickory, Hickory, N.C. pflaghickory@gmail.com.

PFLAG Aiken, Aiken, S.C. pflagaiken.org.

PFLAG Columbia, Columbia, S.C. cola.pflag@gmail.com.

PFLAG Greenville, Greer, S.C. pflagupstatesc.org.

PFLAG Spartanburg, Spartanburg, S.C. pflagupstatesc.org.

This list is not fully comprehensive and qnotes welcomes input so that the list provides accurate information and current resources to maintain its integrity. Email editor@goqnotes.com to make changes or additions.

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views

Role Models

Five key messages on the importance of out gay Olympic athletes Heroes help give public face to youth, others

by Stan Kimer :: guest contributor

T

he exciting 2018 Winter Olympics concluded last month. As a huge figure skating fan and an adult skater myself, I spent way too many hours in front of the television this February. And as a diversity and career development consultant with a deep expertise in the LGBTQ workplace and marketplace, I was thrilled to see the positive coverage and celebration of our out gay Olympians.

Most notable among the American athletes were figure skater Adam Rippon, whose brilliant long program in the team event helped secure a bronze medal for the USA in the Team Figure Skating event, and skier Gus Kenworthy, who won a bronze medal at the 2014 Olympics and then a year later came out publicly as gay on the cover of ESPN magazine. And from Canada there is pairs skater Eric Radford, who won the bronze medal with his skating partner Megan Duhamel.

So why is this important? I feel it sends five very important messages to struggling LGBTQ youth and others to boost them in their life journey. Here are the five: 1. Embrace who you are. It is important to feel positive and good about all the aspects of yourself that make you uniquely you. That is one of the important messages of diversity and inclusion — that each and every person s unique, and we should each celebrate our own distinct combination of diversity attributes.

2. You are good — there is nothing wrong in being gay or queer.

It is so sad that some faith traditions, certain politicians, and even some families propagate the lie that being queer is sinful, wrong or defective. This can destroy a young person who is struggling to find their place of belonging in the world. Our gay Olympic athletes showed us that they are wonderful, good, accomplished people fully enjoying their lives as well as their Olympic experience.

3. Don’t set limits — you can achieve and excel. These athletes, who are among the best in the world, did not buy into the lie that being gay was a defect that would hold them back from achieving great things. LGBTQ people can win gold medals, run companies, be accomplished musicians and actors. Queer kids, like anyone else, should feel free to pursue any career and hobby for which they have passion and talent, with no limits.

It is important to connect with positive supportive people like British Skeleton gold medalist Lizzy Yarnold, a straight ally who wore rainbow laces to show her support for LGBTQ atheletes.

4. Find and focus on the supportive community. In addition to being embraced by the media (Adam Rippon became the media darling of the Olympics with his sparkling, fun personality and

poised interviews,) these gay athletes got their share of hateful, nasty tweets and online posts. It is so very sad that there are still so many people who feel the need to judge others and put others down because they are different from them.

Instead of getting thrown off by the haters, it is important to find and develop relationships with the supportive community. No one needs hate.

Ignore and discard it.

5. D o what you can to share positivity with others.

The infectious enthusiasm of the out gay athletes brought joy to their fans. Even Adam Rippon mentioned all the positive feedback he received from people struggling with their sexual orientation who were uplifted by Adam’s appearance at the Olympics and on television. By being who he is and expressing it with such elegance and positiveness, Adam profoundly helped so many others in their life journeys.

I do know of a few well-meaning people who say, “why does this person need to be so public about being gay?” The answer? It is because it is who they are, and by fully embracing themselves, they empower others to celebrate their diversity, enjoy life to the fullest, and contribute their best to the human family. : : — Stan Kimer is a career development and diversity consultant with Total Engagement Consulting by Kimer and has expertise in corporate LGBTQ diversity strategy and training. In his spare time, he also trains as an adult competitive figure skater.

Visit totalengagementconsulting.com to learn more.

••••• For more about out gay figure skaters, as well as other sports figures and issues, read: “Seven Fabulous ‘Out’ Gay Men of Figure Skating” bit.ly/2pgjB1r.

“Seven More Fabulous Out Gay Men of Figure Skating (and One Bisexual Woman)” bit.ly/2pfpEEy.

Stan Kimer with Olympic skater Adam Rippon.

“Russia, LGBT Rights and the Psychology of Bullying” bit.ly/2HyVnHp. “Fortunate is the NFL Team that Drafts Out Gay Football Standout Michael Sam!” bit.ly/2phIbPJ. “Football, Bullying and LGBT Diversity — The Good, The Bad and The Ugly” bit.ly/2GvUPml. “Five Important Ramifications of NBA Pro Basketball Player Jason Collins’ Coming Out” bit.ly/2GACwws.

spiritual reflections

by Rev. M. Frances Comer :: guest contributor

A Letter to Our Youth Dear Friends, You are loved. Each of you — gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex, asexual, gender-queer, Photo Credit: edas99 via Adobe Stock

gender fluid…Beneath whatever identities you claim or do not claim, beneath whatever labels may have been placed on you or hurled at you, there is an individual who is a unique and valuable aspect of creation.

While some of you may experience a lack of support from your family of origin, condemnation from a religious paradigm, or even slurs from shallow-minded bullies, please don’t let those painful moments steal your resolve to be who you are and to find joy in this life. There are people out there (and members of religious institutions out there) who will love you just as you are, whoever you are, and wherever you are on your journey. May you live fully into your authentic self in a world that is not always kind to difference. Ralph Waldo Emerson said that “for nonconformity, the world whips us with its displeasure.” While we’ve seen major improvements in the tolerance level of diversity in the United States, we know there’s still quite a way to go before aspects of an ideal culture of inclusion, acceptance, hospitality,

kindness and love will be realized. The current “real” culture, while it is much improved in the last several decades, frequently offers us messages that reflect quite the opposite of the aforementioned aspirations. Many of us have experienced the “displeasure” that Emerson wrote about so long ago. We’ve experienced it in a world that has historically marginalized us and in a country that continues to do so in many areas. In the face of prejudice, discrimination, ignorance and sometimes even hatred, it takes great courage and fierce resolve to move forward, but you have those things; you have that courage. You wouldn’t have made it this far without those qualities.

Take time to appreciate your own beauty. This minister’s prayer is that our world will move forward at a quicker pace toward equality for all people. Imagine walking into a room and bringing all of who you are and being altogether welcomed! May it be so, my young friends, may it be so.

Rev. Comer

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out in print

by Terri Schlichenmeyer :: qnotes contributor

A transgender woman’s journey ‘Tomorrow Will Be Different’

by Sarah McBride c.2018, Crown Archetype $26.00 / $35.00 Canada 288 pages

T

hings are never as bad as they seem.

There’s always a brighter spot if you just look for it, always something to be thankful for, a way of making yourself feel better because things aren’t as they seem. As in the new book “Tomorrow Will Be Different” by Sarah McBride, there’s always a chance to make a change.

Though she was 10 years old the first time she heard the word “transgender,” Sarah McBride knew from an early age that she was really a girl. Problem was, everyone around her saw her as a boy, and she didn’t want to disillusion them because she didn’t want to disappoint them.

And so, McBride tamped down a feeling of “homesickness” inside herself, and she tried to be a boy by dating girls, joining a fraternity at college, and doing guy things that felt wrong. It wasn’t ‘til the end of her time as student body president at American University that she took the leap and came out, publicly, as a woman.

It was a relief, she says, and though there was some initial shock, her friends and family

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Oh-so-subtly, McBride makes readers’ brains itch. LGBTQ teens can be fragile, and you’ll watch closer after reading this book. Health care isn’t just an issue for the middle-class, and you’ll understand better now. Politics aren’t just something to rant about, and in the midst of all this, believe it or not, you may be better off than you think you are. This book forces a different way of looking at things, but you might not initially notice that as you’re crying over the rest of this memoir.

So bring tissues while you read, and let your brain itch. Let “Tomorrow Will Be Different” sink in because things can always be better than they seem. : :

never stopped loving her. For that, she acknowledges her fortune; a high percentage of her LGBTQ peers aren’t so lucky.

Not long after this major life-changer, McBride was accepted for a dream come true, landing an internship at the Obama White House. She’d been fascinated by politics since she was small and was a campaign volunteer in her home state of Delaware. Starting in the Office of Public Engagement, she was quickly engaged; activism, as McBride learned, was something she could sink her teeth into, as a transgender woman.

Happier than she’d ever been, McBride’s life continued to rise: she fell in love with Andy, whom she’d met at a party, though she didn’t see him again until he emailed her months later. He was transgender, too — a homegrown Wisconsin boy with a sense of humor, and she adored him. The future was bright.

And then things changed again…

There’s a message inside “Tomorrow Will Be Different” — and it’s not the activism one that you think is there.

Oh, there’s no denying that author Sarah McBride is an activist, and she’s been a big part in making change, not only at the statelevel, but nationally. She’s a history-maker and a shaker. But this book isn’t just about that.

Sarah McBride

Photo Credit: Mat Marshall

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Music Scene

Good as gold An interview with Sarah Shook of Sarah Shook and the Disarmers

by Gregg Shapiro :: guest contributor

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ueer singer/songwriter Sarah Shook is here to shake up contemporary country music. Her take on the traditional country breakup tune, on songs such as “Good As Gold,” “New Ways To Fail,” “Over You,” “Parting Ways” and “Heartache In Hell” from album “Years” (Bloodshot), redefine the genre’s old standby in new and refreshing ways. As for drinking songs, Shook has more than a few in her repertoire.

Putting the out in outlaw, the North Carolina-based Shook was kind enough to speak with me about her music in February 2018.

GS: “The Bottle Never Lets Me Down” is a nod to Merle Haggard’s “The Bottle Let Me Down.”

Where does Haggard land on your list of musical influences?

SS: I honestly don’t listen to a lot of Merle Haggard. If I’m going to be listening to old school country, I’ll listen to Charley Pride. Hank (Williams) Sr. is one of my all-time favorite songwriters. Also Kitty Wells.

Sarah Shook & The Disarmers

Gregg Shapiro: I recently interviewed singer/ songwriters Lucy Dacus and H.C. McEntire, both of whom are, like you, queer Southern women. Have you found community among queer Southerners, especially among creative people? If so, what does that mean to you?

Sarah Shook: I think there is definitely a community here in the Chapel Hill area. I do remind myself often that we have the luxury of living in a pretty progressive bubble up here. There are a lot of great venues and clubs owned by forward-thinking individuals. There are local businesses that are non-discriminatory in their practices. It is something that I try to keep in mind — that one, two or three counties over it’s a whole different story.

GS: Your band is called The Disarmers. How did that name come about?

SS: I wanted to choose a name that made our politics pretty clear. Especially being in an outlaw country band that comes with a certain kind of expectation sometimes from the consumers’ point of view. [Laughs] Every stereotype and trope you can imagine about that is still kind of alive and well today [laughs].

I wanted to pick something that was not confrontational as much as it was a playful suggestion of where our ideas lie.

GS: Your new album “Years” features some heart-tugging break-up songs, including “Over You” and “Heartache In Hell.” What is it about country music that makes it such a good fit for songs of this nature?

SS: I think, in general, country music is great for the classic sort of tale-of-woe, tearin-your-beer type of story.

Oftentimes, lyrically, country songs can be self-deprecating.

At the same time, one of the things that’s interesting to me about country music, (specifically) country songs written by a man from the man’s point of view about a woman, is the way the character often gives no indication as to what it was that he did [laughs] to drive his ex-lover away. It’s more just a bemoaning of his state where he paints

Photo Credit: John Geesner

himself as this victim of circumstances who’s now going to be walking the floor forever over this lost love [laughs]. I try to change things up, especially as far as traditional gender roles are concerned, lyrically and emotionally, within my songs.

GS: On the flipside, there are also songs, such as “Good As Gold” and “New Ways To Fail,” about surviving break-ups. Which is more fun to write — songs about surviving break-ups or songs about wallowing over a break-up?

SS: Surviving is definitely more fun [laughs].

But I think that both types of songs, and songwriting processes, are important for me.

Especially because you can’t tell the whole story or paint the whole picture with one of those. Allowing yourself to feel the pain and heartache of loss, but not giving up at that point. Picking yourself up and carrying on afterwards. One thing I like to say is that I can’t afford a therapist and my songwriting is [laughs] my catharsis and my therapy.

GS: How much of the songs in which drinking figures — “Damned If I Do, Damned If I Don’t,” “Lessons,” “The Bottle Never Lets Me Down” — are based on experience and how much are poetic license?

SS: They’re all based on experience [laughs].

One of the things that’s really frustrating to me now is that there are so many bands that are jumping on the country and Americana bandwagon, writing songs about whiskey Sarah Shook & the Disarmers Carolina Dates: April 6 “Years” Album Release Show The Cradle, 300 E. Main St., Carborro, NC Tickets: $12/advance bit.ly/2GytobJ

because they have seen other bands have success doing that. They’re like, “Let’s just do this cookie-cutter model thing where we can sing about heartache and getting drunk every night.” It’s beyond frustrating to me when this is my actual life that they’re co-opting. I actually do drink whiskey every night. I do have a problem. I do rely on these substances to help me get through the pain of life. To see them cavalierly throw alcoholism and substance abuse around is incredibly frustrating.

GS: You are embarking on a multi-city concert tour. What can folks expect when they attend a Sarah Shook & The Disarmers show?

SS: We have a lot of fun onstage. We’re rowdy and loud. We are not a mild-mannered group of people on the stage [laughs]. We’re very raucous! : :

April 7 Neighborhood Theatre 511 E. 36th St., Charlotte, NC Tickets: $10/advance, $13/day of ticketf.ly/2GxXThN For more information, visit disarmers.com.

GS: To my ears, “Parting Words” and “What It Takes” contain some of your most overtly queer lyrics.

SS: A lot of my songs are written empathetically from someone else in my life’s point of view. “Parting Words,” as well as “Good As Gold,” was interesting in terms of the songwriting process in that a lot of the breakup songs on “Years” were written about my recent ex-boyfriend. I was writing the songs about him but from his perspective. Trying to play on his view of the way things were as much as I might disagree with it. It’s interesting to me, and it encourages me that “Parting Words” is a song that anyone can listen to and find some kind of relevance. It can be any combination of lovers.

It can be a song from a woman’s point of view about a woman or a woman and a man or any combination. As far as the bigger universal picture, I think it’s important that we think about things like that.

When you think about it in those terms, all of these invisible lines that divide us get erased. At the end of the day, we’re all just people who are amazingly experiencing the same things in different ways.

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dishing with buff faye

by Buff Faye :: qnotes contributor :: info@bufffaye.com

Calling Out Prejudice: Me, Myself & Drag

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t the age of 21, I published my first book “Out on Fraternity Row.” It became a bestseller in the gay community. I recall the moment when I saw the book for the first time in a Barnes & Noble Booksellers and on all the queer bookracks. I was so proud.

I imagine that might be what it feels like to give birth, without the arduous pain of hours of labor, of course. All in all, the book took three years, lots of hard work and countless sleepless nights.

Fast forward 10 years, and that one book led to five more over the next 10 years. My most popular book was published in 2006 entitled “The Advocate College Guide for LGBTQ Students.” It was the first-ever college guidebook for youth on the “best of the best” LGBTQ-friendly colleges and universities. I credit the book and my development of the Campus Pride Index as a pivotal moment for LGBTQ youth within higher education. Finally, LGBTQ youth were not only vital to campus diversity efforts, but also as a new recruitment population for college campuses.

This paradigm shift led to more colleges exercising their institutional responsibility for LGBTQ youth and implementing more LGBTQ-inclusive policies, programs and practices.

During this time, I also took my first job at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte (UNCC) and co-founded CampusPride.Net, a clearing-

house for LGBTQ youth at colleges and universities. This led me to develop resources like the Stop the Hate Bias & Hate Crime Prevention Train the Trainer program, the first national LGBTQfriendly College Fairs, and the Campus Pride Index, the only online national benchmarking tool for LGBTQ inclusion in higher education, among other resources and services. And ultimately I chose to leave my full-time job at UNCC to pursue moving CampusPride.Net into a fully fledged national nonprofit called Campus Pride. It was an exciting time, and yet a huge risk for me to leave a career with benefits to pursue my passion and do something that I felt could make a difference for others.

From television appearances on CNN to national news stories, Campus Pride has changed the way the public understands LGBTQ youth within higher education. I have no regrets about the past 20 years, and the path I have chosen. It has been a rewarding journey, full of amazing young people and many surprises.

One of the big surprises was doing drag.

I never thought I would do drag — or write a monthly column called “Dishing with Buff Faye.” It all started as a way to raise money for charity — including the work I was doing with Campus Pride. But I guess I fell in love with it — the sense of comfort and freedom to explore yourself and gender expression.

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I especially enjoyed the Photo Credit: Roxy Taylor connection it allowed with youth and audiences of all ages. Plus, I was able to talk about the work of Campus Pride and raise money for supporting LGBTQ youth in a different way.

Then I realized that something was being lost.

Unexpectedly to me, I found many people suddenly began to forget about my life outside of drag, and the drag began to consume everything else. All the work I had wanted to see or their own prejudice toward done prior to doing drag was drag queens. And some of these comments being dismissed, and I was becoming known as come from other drag queens, so it is not about a drag queen. People started calling me by my placing blame solely on others outside the drag drag name “Buff Faye” in public. Somewhere community. Either way, it is petty, wrong and in this process “Shane Windmeyer” — the reinforces the harm and discrimination we all national best-selling author, the public speaker, face as LGBTQ people. the educator, the LGBTQ activist — was getting I chose to share this now because we can lost in my drag persona. do better as an LGB community. We must do And sadly, somewhere along the line, better. I intentionally left out the T for transgenpeople (mostly LGB) began to assume because der people because trans people live this truth I did drag that I did not have a full-time career daily. They encounter this discrimination and or any type of job. Or worse yet, that doing drag prejudice daily. It is all rooted in the idea that disomehow diminished who I was as a workplace verse gender expression outside the norm and/ professional, my past accomplishments or the or binary, “cross dressing” or “gender variant value of my work that I did outside drag. Why expression” is bad. And that is what we must was being a drag queen seen as less, not more? change within our own thinking and others’.

This never really bothered me because I If we are truly to be free to “express largely have never cared about what people ourselves” as Madonna would say, then we think. F@CK THEM! Plus I loved doing drag and must break down these constructs of gender the money raised was going toward LGBTQ and labels. Drag queens perform a service for youth with Campus Pride or toward other our community, helping all of us to reimagine national or local charities. gender and discover our “true” selves. : : Still I find this troubling because I am not the only drag queen who has experienced this DRAG TIP: Looking for size 10, 11, 12 and 13 prejudice — or a type of queer erasure. women’s shoes? Try Payless or Walmart — or Today it is common to hear many judgmenbetter yet, shop online before that big night out. tal comments about drag queens, as if we are all the same. Many assume that drag queens — Buff Faye calls the Queen City her home perform to find celebrity or garner attention, and and performs to change the world while some may do that, there are many other (and to raise money for charities). reasons why people choose to be drag queens.

Find her at your favorite bars and hotspots.

I specifically have found many within the Plus don’t forget her weekly Saturday night LGB community discounting my work with show with Patti O’Furniture, monthly Sunday Campus Pride or in the larger community drag brunch and regular Friday night party bus. because I do drag. I believe sometimes it Learn more at AllBuff.com. was indeed intentional, but most of the time, Follow on Twitter @BuffFaye I’m guessing it was a product of what they

SHOUT OUTS: Come out to Buff Faye’s Drag Brunch at our new location at Boulevard 1820 twice a month with two seating times at 11 a.m. and 1 p.m. Buy your tickets online at AllBuff.com.

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++++++++ Sponsored Content ++++++++

from the Rx pad……

by Rx Clinic Pharmacy, a comprehensive onsite service of Ballantyne Family Medicine

What’s All the Hype About Endometriosis?

By Edana Holliday, PharmD For centuries women have faced health issues that are not always understood. This article will shed some light on one of them as it shares what endometriosis disease is and how it may affect the women in your life.

Endometriosis is a disease that affects the reproductive organs of women and often goes undiagnosed. Women that are affected by the disease (both diagnosed and undiagnosed) often have interruptions in their daily lives as a result of the sometimes-debilitating symptoms.

Often these complications can impact the ability to thrive in school, careers, finances, personal relationships, and social relationships. Unlike other disorders related to women’s health, endometriosis is not biased in those that are affected. The disorder can affect women of all sizes, races, and socioeconomic status. The goal of the information shared here is to briefly explain the disease, as well as provide information to those who feel they may know someone suffering with undiagnosed symptoms.

Approximately 176 million women in the world are currently affected by endometriosis, with almost 10% still being undiagnosed1.

A majority of the women impacted by endometriosis face the peak of their complications during reproductive ages between 25-35 as the disorder can cause infertility or difficulty in conceiving. Endometriosis primarily involves the uterus which is commonly overgrown with cells

that cover the organ. Common risk factors can include family history, low body weight, increase in age, excessive use of alcohol, early start of menses, and intercourse during menses2. These risk factors are common for many women, and over time can drastically increase the risk of severe cases of endometriosis.

At this point, you maybe wondering how a female would know if they were at risk or had developed endometriosis and what are the next steps if there is a diagnosis. Common symptoms include painful menstruation, heavy menstrual bleeding, painful intercourse, infertility, chronic pelvic or abdominal pain without menses, and fatigue.

If these symptoms seem familiar to you or to someone you love, it may be time to consult your medical provider about the symptoms. Many times, women will not bring up concerns because they have accepted that those symptoms are “normal” for them. However, the symptoms above are linked to health concerns that could impact the lifestyle of women as they age. Conversations with a medical provider may lead to an MRI or CT scan to look at the uterus or a simple abdominal or pelvic exam.

Women living with endometriosis have limited treatment options, but as the disorder gains more respect, additional research has begun to identify better opportunities for treatment advancement. All patients are encouraged to make lifestyle changes regardless of the severity of symptoms. Some simple tasks can be utilized to alleviate symptoms.

Consuming more vegetables and decreasing meals with higher fat content, baths in warm water, heating pads, and even acupuncture have proven to relieve complications. For patients with more severe

symptoms where medication is required, there are a number of options to improve the quality of life of the patient. These include pain medications (NSAIDS — ibuprofen, naproxen), Mirena, and birth control tablets. The last two options can stabilize any hormone imbalances and alleviate the severity of symptoms. Those who take the next step and talk to their medical provider often feel more empowered when they understand the options available to improve their quality of life.

Think about the women who may suffer in your life and how obtaining knowledge about this disorder could very well change their world. Knowledge is power and the more you know about your body, the more you can help others. Women are more prone to take care of those around them and focus on their own health last. Take a pledge to pay attention to your own body or to the bodies of those you love. When you feel as though they need help, encourage them to find assistance.

Remember to reach out to the health care team in your area for resources.

References: 1. “What is endometriosis? Causes, Symptoms, and Treatments,” Endometriosis Foundation of America.

Available at: https://www.endofound.org/endometriosis 2. Ashrafi, M., Sadatmahalleh, S., akhoond, M., and Talebi, M. Evaluation of Risk Factors Associated with Endometriosis in Infertile Women. International Journal of Fertility and Sterility. 2016; 10(1): 11-21.

3. Armstrong, Carrie. ACOG Updates Guideline on Diagnosis and Treatment of Endometriosis. Am Fam Physician. 2011 Jan 1; 83(1):84-85.

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tell trinity

by Trinity :: qnotes contributor :: trinity@telltrinity.com

Ending a relationship so that no one gets killed Hey Trinity, My ex is mad, not because I dumped him, but because I did it on the phone. With my last breakup, I just wrote an email and that worked fine. Did I do something wrong?

Why Be There, Maui, HI Hey Why Be There, In no book, Bible or contract is it written, “You can dump someone like a wimp, i.e., via phone, email, voicemail or Post-it Note. Ending a healthy relationship is like ripping a nursing baby from its mother’s bosom, especially if you’ve been dating for over a month. In other words, sweetie, you must end it like a doctor telling someone they have cancer, by being present, gentle and ready for tears or anger.

Next time do it in person, please, and close to their home so no one gets killed.

breathing exercises or spiritually accept “it’s all taken care of,” plus watch his sugar and coffee intake. A glass of wine with meals might help too. Lastly, darling, let him know that his drama truly rules and ruins: you, him, your relationship and world peace. (Relationships are about rulers. You don’t have to make others feel small when you are in a relationship, nor do you have to be a shrinking violet, as my cartoon shows.)

Dear Trinity, I’ve been dating a girl who smokes (and smokes and smokes). It’s been six months of avoiding her breath, clothes, hands and ashtrays. Help!

In Cigarette Hell, Austin, TX

Dearest Trinity, I’ve been with my partner for almost 18 months, and it’s still one big drama after another. How can I stop the drama before it destroys our relationship?

Less Drama, Hoboken, NJ

Dear Cigarette Hell, Dating a smoker means being polite while suffocating. Even the outdoors promises no salvation. Sorry, but it may never go away until a) she quits smoking, b) you begin smoking, c) you create some “smoking rules” or d) you both quit…the relationship. Until then, honey, it may always be “me, my date and her cigarette.”

Dearest Less Drama, Unfortunately, some people are born with “drama cells.” So, get him to either meditate, do

Hello Trinity, I’m 40 and dating a 28-year old who is great, but still dresses and lives li-e a student on a

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student budget. He needs a makeover.

How do I tell him?

Makeover Mate, Montreal, Canada Hello Makeover Mate, Many students even 10 years after graduation don’t realize dorm life is over. If you want this to work, pumpkin, send him flowers with a copy of: Trinity’s Sensible Tips For “What It’s Time To Do By Your 28th Birthday” 1. It’s time to move out of your family’s house unless assisting an ailing relative!

2. It’s time to replace those meals of french fries, chips, alcohol and cereals with the “adult diet” of foods you have to cook.

3. It’s time to rebuild your wardrobe because those old clothes that made you look cool 10 years ago now make you look unemployed!

4. I t’s time to fully accept the word “hygiene” — including daily showers, moisturizers, (unwanted) hair trimmings and twice-a-year dental cleanings.

5. I t’s time to start a healthy lifestyle, which means a) “partying” only on special occasions and b) needing to “prove” yourself only to… yourself.

6. I t’s time to refurbish and repaint. The milk crate cabinets, bed sheet curtains and torn posters never really worked anyway!

7. It’s time to start an exercise plan by getting a jogging partner, signing up for a gym membership or joining a sports team and counting your cholesterol.

8. It’s time to start a relationship by actively looking to date, going on dates, or finally marrying the guy or girl you’ve dated for the last eight years.

9. It’s time to have a self-sustaining job, pay your own bills and credit cards and be mature enough to know when to ask for help!

10. Lastly, it’s time to decide who you are. The days of hanging out with best friends at the pinball arcades are over! : : info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.

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EVENTS April-May 2018 WhiteOut Latinx Party Bar Argon 4544 South Blvd. Ste. H, Charlotte 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

Orgullo (Charlotte Latin Pride) and Bar Argon bring the WhiteOut Party to Charlotte, featuring exotic performers, drink specials and the best Latin rhythms, provided by DVJ Flakko.

Special performances will also be provided by Adecia Lush, AmanDuh Pleaze and others. This event is for those 21 and up. Tickets cost $10, $5 for members.

More information is available online. facebook.com/events/169563897174964. barargon.com.

Submit your event to our calendar!

You can submit your event to our comprehensive community calendar presented by qnotes, the Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce and Visit Gay Charlotte. Submit your event at goqnotes.com/eventsubmit/ and get a threefor-one entry. All Charlotte-area events will appear on each of the three calendars at qnotes (goqnotes.com), Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce (clgbtcc.org) and Visit Gay Charlotte (visitgaycharlotte.com).

Continues through Apr. 15 ‘One Day: A Concert of Healing and Reconciliation’ Various locations & times The Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte will present “One Day: A Concert of Healing and Reconciliation” at three different venues over a three-day period featuring the ground-breaking work “Seven Last Words of the Unarmed,” and the soon-to-be-award-winning setting of the Police Officer’s Prayer, “Be At My Side.”

The performances will take place on Apr. 13, at 7:30 p.m., at Statesville Avenue Presbyterian Church, at 3435 Nevin Rd., Charlotte; Apr. 14, at 7:30 p.m., at All Saint’s Episcopal Church, at 1201 S. New Hope Rd., Gastonia; and Apr. 15, at 3 p.m., at St. John’s Baptist Church, 300 Hawthorne One Voice Chorus Presents “Bayard Rustin: The Man Behind the Dream” Ln., Charlotte. The performance on the SEP APR MO Mint Museum Uptown, 500 S. Tryon St., Charlotte 14th will benefit PFLAG Gastonia. Tickets 3-5 p.m. are $25. Tickets and more information are One Voice Chorus presents the story of civil available online. rights hero Bayard Rustin through the newlygmccharlotte.org. commissioned work, “The Man Behind the Dream,” by composer Steve Milloy. Rustin served as personal assistant to Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and as an organizer of the 1963 March on Washington, Charlotte Symphony SEP APR MO Altsounds: but was pushed to the back by some leaders because he was openly gay. Allen University Chorus from Columbia, S.C. will be special guests. Tickets are $15-$20. Tickets ‘Rockin’ With Dylan’ Knight Theater and more information is available online.

430 S. Tryon St., Charlotte onevoicechorus.com.

7:30 p.m.

A six-student School of Rock Tap Into The Primaries: house band will join the SEP APR MO MeckPAC Spring Reception Charlotte Symphony orchestra Heist Brewery, 2909 N. Davidson St., Ste. 200, Charlotte for a show featuring the 6:30-9 p.m. works of the legendary Bob Dylan. The MeckPAC hosts its 2018 Spring Reception, where it will announce its centerpiece of the program is a work by primary endorsements for the upcoming elections. A suggested donation of $50 to help contemporary composer John Corigliano, the organization continue its work can be paid at the door, but any amount is accepted inspired by Dylan’s poems, featuring and appreciated. Donations at higher levels come with drink tickets as well as tickets to new music soprano Lindsay Kesselman.

MeckPAC’s upcoming 20th Anniversary event in the fall. Light hors d’oeuvres and a cash Tickets start at $19. Tickets and more bar will be available for attendees. More information is available online. information are available online. meckpac.org. blumenthalarts.org.

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FURnace SEP APR MO Bar Argon 4544 South Blvd. Ste. H, Charlotte 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

Join the crew at Bar Argon for another FURnace party, full of bears, beats and brews.

Charlotte’s own DJ Marvyy Marvv will provide the soundtrack and visuals.

Entry is $10, $5 for members of Bar Argon or Sidelines. More information is available online. barargon.com. facebook.com/events/1813219768702398.

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Continues through Apr. 22 SEP APR MO BOOM Festival Various locations in Plaza Midwood, Charlotte Times vary The annual BOOM Festival returns, Apr. 20-22, with performance arts events taking place across a number of venues in the Plaza Midwood neighborhood of Charlotte, including Petra’s, at 1919 Commonwealth Ave., Open Door Studios, at 1318-D Central Ave., and Snug Harbor, at 1228 Gordon St. There will also be multiple art installations taking place around the area as part of the festival, as well as a performance inside an inflatable igloo off Pecan Avenue. Performers include Sinergismo, Mall Goth, XOXO, TAPROOT CLT, Aerial Charlotte, Tosco Music Party, Loren Fletcher Dance, Quentin Talley, Lofidels and many more.

Many performances are free and tickets for the festival are $10. Tickets and more information are available online. boomcharlotte.org.

Time Out Youth MasQueerade Prom Time Out Youth Center 3800 Monroe Rd., Charlotte 7-10 p.m.

Time Out Youth Center will hold its annual LGBTQ and ally prom, for those ages 13-20, and it anticipates that this will be its biggest and best one to date. The event will be held in its new home at 3800 Monroe Rd., and organizers have shared that it will feature “entertainment, food, music, photography and fun in a safe, chaperoned environment.” Tickets are $5 and can be purchased at bit.ly/2pldIRr. More information is available online. timeoutyouth.org/youth/prom. facebook.com/events/204052130341715.

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AIDS WALK Charlotte SEP MAY MO Two Wells Fargo Center 325 S. Tryon St., Charlotte 9 a.m.-1 p.m.

Prime Timers 25th SEP APR MO AIDS WALK Charlotte will Anniversary Gala take place in uptown, after a morning SMS Catering program and awards, 1764 Norland Rd., Charlotte presented by advocacy 7 p.m. group RAIN. “The walk The Charlotte Prime is 1.8 miles long and Timers, a social and civil takes the average perrights group for mature son about 30 minutes,” organizers said. gay and bisexual men, will celebrate its 25th anniversary with a gala “AIDS WALK Charlotte is a family affair event. Enjoy a buffet dinner, entertainment (kids and pets are welcomed) and open provided by local artists, door prizes and to all who want to participate.” More giveaways. Tickets are $25 and are avail- information is available online. carolinarain.org. able online at squ.re/2pm9VCG. facebook.com/events/138214016825867. primetimersww.com/charlotte.

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life

Our People:

Q&A with Amy Glaser Youth Activist, Entertainer

by Torie Dominguez :: torie@goqnotes.com

A

s executive director and co-founder of Insideout180, a Durham, N.C.-area LGBTQ youth outreach network encompassing the programs iNSIDEoUT, UPSIDEDOWN and The Cypher, Amy Glaser has dedicated herself to enriching the lives of young people — or rather, helping them access the resources they need to enrich their own.

ecological justice and peak oil, was released in the summer of 2012.)

Which of your achievements are you most proud of?

I dug an 80-foot trench and filled it with gravel to direct rainwater away from the foundation of my house. That was pretty awesome.

What inspired you to work in the field you do?

My experiences as a queer teenager, which often left me feeling powerless and struggling a great deal with my gender and sexual identities. I was involved with activism in high school, but the adult world felt oppressive and was distrustful of youth power.

What helps you relax when you’re feeling stressed?

Running, hiking, playing music, practicing mindfulness. Sleep and hot baths. Breathing.

What cheers you up when you’re feeling down?

Raw juice, exercise, my dog.

When she describes herself as having “worked with LGBTIQA (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex, queer, questioning, asexual and allied)” youth since 2004, her choice to expand the more common “LGBT” acronym and define the expanded version speak to her fundamental belief in young people’s right to self-determination, the incontestable validity of their identities. It’s that respect for the humanity of youth that’s inspired her to guide, rather than to manage, iNSIDEoUT as a hub of collaboration among school Gay-/ Queer-Straight Alliance groups in the North Carolina Triangle. In 2009 she was instrumental in establishing Outside In, a 501(c)(3) organization run by adults to provide legal, logistical and material support to the teen-led project. 2011 saw the birth of UPSIDEDOWN, a new group serving younger members of the community. The first meeting of The Cypher, a creative music-focused support group for queer and trans youth of color, was held on March 10.

Meanwhile, West Virginia native and University of Wisconsin – Madison philosophy graduate Glaser is weeks away from graduating with a Ph.D. in Philosophy of Youth and Childhood Studies from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

Her dissertation delves into philosophical issues of “youth liberation,” which she believes “holds awesome potential for social transformation.”

(Speaking of transformation: Glaser can sometimes be found answering to the name of Dr. Fruit, an offbeat entertainer who “write[s] and sing[s] fun, socially conscious kids’ music that respects young people’s intelligence” and authored the book “Snoredecai,” about Glaser/Fruit’s real-life canine BFF Mordecai.

Dr. Fruit’s first album, a whimsical take on topics ranging from ableism and speciesism to

What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

There’s no time like the present.

problems (we consume a quarter of the world’s oil!), so we have great potential to resolve those problems.

What do you like most about yourself?

I dream big and try to make it happen.

What aspect of yourself would you like to change?

Negative self-talk.

Imagine traveling somewhere incredibly remote, with no way of contacting the outside world. Are you more thrilled or petrified?

I like nature and being cut off from the “outside world;” I’m not that into travel. So a mix of thrilled, plus I’d rather stay close to home.

If you met yourself, do you think you’d be your friend?

I would hope so!

What have you always wanted to do, be, or learn, but never gotten around to?

I want to learn Spanish.

And finally, how would you like to be remembered?

As a force for bringing people together. : :

How do you spend your free time?

I spend a lot of time hanging out with friends around a fire in my back yard. Also, I’m learning to play the accordion.

If you won a multi-million-dollar jackpot, what would you do with the money?

Start a new project, like maybe building a free school. I’d also really like to have a kind of drum called a hang. They’re very expensive!

Are you an early bird or a night owl?

Early bird. But I also like to sleep in, so it’s a struggle.

What household chore do you avoid at all costs?

Providing childcare and music lessons out of my house requires me to keep up even with the chores I hate the most, such as cleaning the tub.

What possessions do you cherish most?

I love my Omega 8005 juicer. I have a lot of musical instruments that I cherish, but they are all replaceable. I’m not really that attached to possessions.

When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

An actress! After making my debut as Tilly the Tooth in my third grade class’ production about dental hygiene.

If you could live in any time period, past or future, anywhere in the world, what would you choose?

Right here, right now. This is the most amazing time to be alive. We have so much potential. And yet could stand to lose it all.

The United States causes a lot of the world’s

April 6-19 . 2018

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April 6-19 . 2018