April 7-20 . 2017
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April 7-20 . 2017
inside
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HB2 fails to get fully flushed!
qnotes news & features
arts. 4 entertainment. HB2 Updatenews. views. 6 Voices of our Youth 7 Youth Leadership 7 TOY gets church gift 8 Youth organizations 10 LGBTQ immigration woes 15 News Notes: Regional Briefs 17 News Notes: U.S./World Briefs
a&e / life&style
Like a tug-of-war game, the full repeal of HB2 has been a real struggle. page 4
21 Tell Trinity 22 Q Events Calendar 23 Dishing with Buff Faye
opinions & views 5 Guest Commentary 5 Spiritual Reflections 19 Jesse’s Journal
more news & features
Jesse’s Journal
Dishing with Buff Faye
Dr. George Weinberg was a pioneer in exploring sexuality for the LGBTQ community. page 19
It’s ‘RuPaul Drag Race’ quiz time! page 23
April 7-20 . 2017
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qnotes connect April 7-20, 2017 Vol 31 No 25
arts. entertainment. news. views. goqnotes.com twitter.com/qnotescarolinas facebook.com/qnotescarolinas
contributors this issue
Buff Faye, Maria Dominguez, Rev. Wanda Floyd, Jason Leclerc, Lainey Millen, Jesse Montegudo, Jeff Taylor, Trinity
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Graphic Design by Lainey Millen Photography: Michael Flippo
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The focus of QNotes is to serve the LGBT and straight ally communities of the Charlotte region, North Carolina and beyond, by featuring arts, entertainment, news and views content in print and online that directly enlightens, informs and engages the readers about LGBT life and social justice issues. Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc., dba QNotes P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222 ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Sales: x201 adsales@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, ph 212.242.6863 Managing Editor: Jim Yarbrough, editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Editor: Lainey Millen, specialassignments@goqnotes.com Social Media Editor: Jeff Taylor, jeff@goqnotes.com Staff Writer: Maria Dominguez, maria@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x205, production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.
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HB2 Update
HB2 Update: the ‘bathroom bill’ is repealed in name only Activist call repeal bill ‘HB 2.0’ by Maria Dominguez :: qnotes staff
The controversy surrounding House Bill 2 (HB2) sees developments every day. The anti-LGBTQ legislation, which mandates public restroom use by birth sex and nullifies local non-discrimination protections, has had massive pushback from advocates and allies. In the interest of keeping our readers informed, qnotes breaks down the avalanche of headlines and provides a brief but comprehensive breakdown of HB2 news. March 22 N.C. House Democratic Leader Darren Jackson tweeted images of proposed legislation that could potentially repeal HB2 but leave key parts of it in place, as well as adding what’s being called a Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA) provision. Rep. Chuck McGrady (R-Henderson), who has been leading his party’s HB2 repeal negotiation, confirmed: “RFRA has been discussed, RFRA light, RFRA first cousin,” said McGrady, though emphasizing that the images Jackson posted were not McGrady’s work. March 23 On the one-year anniversary of HB2 being signed into law, openly LGBTQ North Carolina lawmakers spoke about their personal views of the law. Rep. Cecil Brockman (D-Guilford) said, “We don’t want anything special — we just want to be treated like anybody else…and HB2, unfortunately, has brought out the worst in North Carolina. It’s made us willing to be prejudiced against people we don’t even understand, it’s really brought out that prejudice.” Lesbian Rep. Deb Butler (D-Brunswick) remained hopeful: “I’m convinced that the majority of North Carolinians believe this is a generational issue whose time has passed. We are going to go in the right direction on it,” Butler said. WRAL reported that a conversation with House Speaker Tim Moore revealed that Republican NCGA leaders have no intention of repealing the most controversial provisions of HB2 even if the law itself is compromised: “Moore pledged that the final product would still restrict the use of restrooms by transgender people and would still block local governments from passing any non-discrimination ordinances that go beyond federal law, meaning they wouldn’t include protections for the LGBT community,” wrote WRAL’s Mark Binker and Laura Leslie. The NCAA issued a statement that unless HB2 were repealed by Thursday, March 30, North Carolina would be out of the running to host six years of championship games. The estimated economic cost of such a move may be hundreds of millions. March 24 Washington Post writer Steven Petrow published an article saying that the lack of compromise on HB2 thus far is, in fact, a good thing; Petrow argues that “Basic human rights are not matters for a popular vote — that way lies the ‘tyranny of the majority’ that Founding Father John Adams warned against.” Petrow likens the idea of compromising on HB2 to
other legislative compromises in American history, including the three-fifths compromise that counted five slaves as three people, for the purposes of representation in Congress.
Senate leader Phil Berger and House Speaker Tim Moore announced the introduction of HB 142, which would repeal HB2 but leave certain elements intact. HB 142 would prohibit local regulation of public bathrooms, leaving the issue of “privacy” up to state legislators. The bill would also prohibit local governments from passing non-discrimination regulations until Dec. 2020.
March 27 The Associated Press published an exclusive analysis that found that HB2 will cost the North Carolina economy $3.76 billion dollars over 12 years. The analysis was compiled via interviews and public records requests, but is likely an underestimation due to some factors left out of the analysis because of a lack of definite numbers. Bank of American CEO Brian Moynihan told The News & Observer that some losses weren’t publicized or even Despite all-out efforts, HB2 was not fully flushed down the drain. known: “What’s going on that you A compromise bill was passed and signed by Gov. Roy Cooper. don’t know about?” Moynihan Image via YouTube screenshot. asked. “What convention decided March 30 to take you off the list? What location for a Gov. Roy Cooper pledged his support for distribution facility took you off the list? What corHB 142 and met with Democratic legislators to porate headquarters consideration for a foreign urge them to vote for it. company — there’s a lot of them out there — just The Human Rights Campaign, Equality NC, took you off the list because they just didn’t want and the ACLU announce their opposition to the to be bothered with the controversy? That’s what repeal bill. ACLU N.C. Policy Director Sarah eats you up.” Gillooly said, “it is shameful that legislative N.C. Lt. Gov. Dan Forest released a stateleaders and North Carolina’s governor are ment saying that “The recent economic once again rushing through a discriminatory forecast reported by the Associated Press anti-LGBT measure without proper vetting or has no basis in fact.” Advocates lashed back: an opportunity for public input.” “Instead of acknowledging the tremendous Rev. Dr. William Barber II of the NAACP harm HB2 is doing to North Carolina’s economy, also came out opposed to the compromise bill. Dan Forest can only stick his head in the sand “It is shameful for Tim Moore and Phil Berger to and pretend it isn’t happening,” said Gerrick demand a discriminatory compromise on a bill Brenner, executive director of Progress NC that should have never been passed in the first Action. “Dan Forest needs to stop planning his place,” Barber said. “Above all, any morato2020 campaign for governor, and start doing rium on civil rights is not a compromise, it is a what’s right for North Carolina.” contradiction with the principle of equal proFaith in America co-founder and westerntection under the law and our moral values.” N.C. factory-owner Mitchell Gold released a HB 142 passed in the Senate and House of statement calling for full, unmitigated repeal of Representatives and was signed into law by HB2: “Nobody should have to live in fear that Gov. Roy Cooper. they can be legally fired for reasons that have NCAA President Mark Emmert told reportnothing to do with their job performance,” Gold ers that he was pleased with the progress argued, then called for compassion for the vulon repealing HB2, but that the NCAA Board nerable LGBTQ youth in the state. “Equal rights of Governors will discuss whether the new legislation says to these precious individuals legislation “is a sufficient change in the law that the state recognizes their worth. I know for the board to feel comfortable going back to from personal experience such leadership North Carolina.” saves lives.” The Air Horn Orchestra protesters announced that they planned to stage a demonMarch 29 stration that evening outside the Governor’s The Human Rights Campaign (HRC) released Mansion once again, this time protesting their 10th annual Healthcare Equality Index, HB 142. “We created the Air Horn Orchestra ranking 22 North Carolina hospitals as “Leaders almost exactly a year ago to protest statein LGBTQ Healthcare Equality.” Tari Hanneman, sponsored discrimination against the LGBT Director of the Health Equality Project at the community,” said organizer Tina Haver Currin. Human Rights Campaign Foundation, said, “Unfortunately, it seems Gov. Cooper needs “HB2 has stained North Carolina’s reputation, a loud reminder of what he was elected to but it is heartening to know that these medical do — fully repeal HB2, instead of supporting professionals put their patients over politics and a watered-down ‘compromise’ which leaves continue to give LGBTQ people the best treatmuch of HB2 in place.” : : ment in an affirming environment.”
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guest commentary by Jason Leclerc :: guest contributor
Four ways today’s love is changed There was a time, in a white-dominated, male-regulated, tone-deaf, Protestant version of America, when “love” was patient and kind, not envious, boastful or proud. It did not dishonor others, self-seek. It was not easily angered and kept no record of wrongs. Love, in those days, did not delight in evil, but rejoiced in truth. Love, the objects of power were told in Bible study classes, “always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” That America was a myth, a whitewashed ignorance to myriad other kinds of love. For a narrow swath of the American population with outsized power, those who were lucky enough to know this brand of love, it was controlled as much like a commodity as it was the basis of civilization. When traded, like wheat or oil, among this band of love-rich mercantilists, its value was known and relatively constant — codified as it was in the letters of St. Paul to the Corinthians during the first century. Love was, to the systemic power structure, unchanged; it undergirded families, neighborliness, and faith. It was placed and maintained within a black and white dialectic: its foil was constructed with hatred. The absence of love — even if denied to a group — became hate. It made for an easy paradigm to preserve. That love, however, was off limits in its purest form for many people in America. It was lorded over, a treasure in certain hearts, open only to the closed club of other authorized lovers. It was sometimes granted as crumbs to those who weren’t entitled to enjoy their own wedding cakes; it was celebrated by broomjumping and closet-organizing. Institutional manifestations of love, like marriage, adoptions and cotillions, were denied behind crusty placebos like separate-but-equal and demagogued congressional acts. When full enfranchisement in love’s bounties seemed within reach, Jim Crow and SCOTUS stepped in. As recently as 1967, the definition of love in America maintained the black and white boundaries that had been ensconced in archaic, racist laws. In 1967, Loving v. Virginia placed a prism upon the stark line of love’s body. In 2015, Obergefell used the same prism and laid claim to love’s booty. No longer was the love between black and white Americans off-limits. No longer was love among men a disease to be healed. In the 60 years since Loving, as America has become more inclusive, so too has the singularity of love’s definition been shattered. Love has become more accessible even as the meaning of love — the ownership of love — has changed hands. Love has been transformed by the market, estranged from simple human interactions and played out as theater. At best, love in 2017 is a fiduciary exchange. At worst, it is a cynical swapping of meaningless spittle. Sandwiched in between, optimists might hope, there is a subdued, “maybe.” Much of this love transformation is a sign of the times, a signal that a singular god has passed and that his only begotten son
is but one of many daughters and sons and brothers and mothers and fathers who’ve sacrificed for others. As we have opened up opportunity to more diverse groups within the American experience — as we’ve tinted it with browns and rainbows — so too have we accessorized love with the fables and dreams of others whose voices and kisses have screamed out for equality. Along the way, love has taken on new meanings and has become empowered in a technologically dynamic, increasingly borderless, post-WASP world. Witness love’s transformations. Love has become a political term. In its drive to wrest power from the ensconced power structure, love has been claimed by activists as a symbol of freedom. Love, once shared among lovers in churches, at dinner tables and in bedrooms, now finds itself a rhetorical tool used to protest for visibility. Love is not merely personal anymore. It’s cloaked in red, white and blue on bumper stickers and invoked by activists who have evacuated the word love of its singularity as an interpersonal experience. It’s become a rallying cry, mixed with marches and lunch counters indiscriminately like salt and pepper upon something that should sate all on its own. While the outcome has been to expand access to love, the publicity of the word seems to have come at the expense of the actual expression — or feeling — of love. While it gets plenty of lip service, it is infused of late with more anger and less kindness. Love is no longer the opposite of hate. Instead, it is the opposite of indifference. Love/hate might have been an easy binary to maintain in 1967, fresh out of war and having been met with a world in which an East versus West dichotomy also was emerging and about which straight white men could argue with other white men about pittances like charity, daily bread and safety nets. Soon, as voices across the unbounded prism colored that discussion, the nuances between hatred and indifference became more clear. Yet battles remained to be fought within America. Called to action, fighters for love-the-opposite-of-indifference challenged the status quo. Nothing could be worse than not caring, not acting. The battle for the rights to be fully equal meant visibility and unambiguous enfranchisement — not simply between two people — but in the village of lovers. Of course, without a stark opposite in hatred, love became more nuanced as well: a natural evolution expedited by love-infused discourse: freed intercourse. The meaning of hate has changed. Since indifference displaced hate, our collective perception of hate has been conflated with indifference because of the shifting norms around the definition of love. Thus, activists use the rhetoric of hate interchangeably with indifference. Doing this dismisses the evil behind hatred. In 2017, it is equally “hateful” to not vote as it is to murder. Speech is viewed as equal to violence. Although technology has affected the sinister power of words to express hatred, it can at best merely incite violence. The link between speech and violence is
real, but the two are not synonymous. While the metaphoric value can’t be discounted, the actual mixing of these two words dilutes both and further distances love from its originalist meaning. Thus, in 2017, we find ourselves talking about love and hate instead of actively practicing one and resisting the other. Love means different things to different people. And so what is that meaning? Is there hope for love to complete a loop and reconnect with St. Paul’s definition? Or, in truly poetic American fashion, can the leavens of secular proclamations of love further enrich our understanding of a word, “love,” with arisen poetics? Can diverse groups arrive at their own specific versions of what had previously seemed universal? Every culture in the world has love, and every culture has expressions that capture the spirit of what love is: “Radiate boundless love towards the entire world—above, below, and across—unhindered, without ill will, without enmity.” — The Buddha “Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend.” — MLK “When one is in love, a cliff becomes a meadow.” — Ethiopian proverb “I am grateful to have been loved and to be loved now and to be able to love, because that liberates. Love liberates. It doesn’t just hold — that’s ego. Love liberates. It doesn’t bind. Love says, ‘I love you. I love you if you’re in China. I love you if you’re across town. I love you if you’re in Harlem. I love you. I would like to be near you. I’d like to have your arms around me. I’d like to hear your voice in my ear. But that’s not possible now, so I love you. Go.’” — Maya Angelou And, so, maybe the lamentations of love’s passing are overbaked. Perhaps love becomes better — not merely different — in its appropriation. We aren’t living in 1967 — nor 1867 nor 1997 for that matter — anymore, after all. Maybe our conception of love is a potent solution to our politics, not merely a withering misperception of them. Maybe we achieve a more universal spirit of love, infused with kindred spirits across time and across cultures. Maybe we had to follow host through the desert of love’s isolation from St. Paul to Obergefell. Maybe love hasn’t changed so much after all. Maybe Lin-Manuel Miranda and the bumper stickers are right: Love is love is, simply, love. : : — Jason Leclerc is a poet, blogger, film-maker and political columnist and is the author of “Momentitiousness.” Learn more about him at momentitiousness.com.
spiritual reflections by Rev. Wanda Floyd :: guest contributor
Standing beside and behind LGBTQA youth Angel was 16 when I first met him at church. He came with other members of the church. It was a while before I realized he was trans. The only thing I knew was he had a cool-looking tongue ring. I found out later that my noticing his tongue ring was the thing that kept him coming to church. As a part of his journey, he was not allowed to obtain testosterone legally and so he was getting it by other means. This is all too common among our young trans community. Fortunately, he had a supportive mother, church and friends who stood by him. He was bullied at school and his mother took him out of school and enrolled him in the Walt Whitman School in Texas, one of the few schools in the country for LGBTQA students. Angel later graduated, travelled the world and graduated from Harvard with a Master’s degree in Divinity. I share this story because Angel’s story is a positive one, but many LGBTQA youth lives are not as positive as his. In my time as a pastor, I have heard and seen many stories which do not end as well.
Today many of our LGBTQA youth are coming out at younger ages. They are recognizing who they are, and they are in need of support and role models from the adults whom they encounter. I am amazed they are so in tune with their bodies and their sexuality as early as five years old. I have the privilege of knowing a little boy named Jackson who has been very clear since the age of five he is a boy. He is in a loving and supportive environment, which is comprised of his two fathers and his two biological sisters. He is allowed to be fully himself at school, at home, at church and in the world — another positive story. It saddens me that we live in a world where Angel and Jackson’s stories are the exception to the rule. Statistics show our youth continue to be bullied to the point of suicide. When is it okay to hurt someone to the point where they feel their only option is death? This speaks to the lack of support and the ignorance which still exist in our society. As I look at our country today, I am afraid for our youth. We must come together and pro-
tect each other, especially our youth. As adults, it is our responsibility to teach tolerance and stand up for what is right even if we disagree. The future of our community rests in the hands of our LGBTQA youth today. I believe it is important we empower them and not silence them. Thankfully, Charlotte, North Carolina has resources to aid our youth. We have a wonderful youth center and several spiritual places along with others which can provide support and sanctuary. These places can offer the connections our youth need to help them understand they are loved and supported for who they have been created to be. Get in touch with these organizations to see how you can help our youth: Time Out Youth Center (timeoutyouth.org), Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (pflag.org) and/or Metropolitan Community Church of Charlotte (mycharlotte.org or mccchurch.org). : : — Rev. Wanda Floyd is transitional pastor of Metropolitan Community Church of Charlotte.
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LGBTQ Youth
The voices of our youth Essays by young LGBTQ writers compiled by Maria Dominguez :: qnotes staff
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cross the Carolinas and the world, young LGBTQ people are at the forefront of the community’s fight. Whether it’s an inner conflict to come to terms with an identity, or and outer struggle for acceptance in a trying world, LGBTQ youth represent the best of us. The finalists for qnotes’ Youth Essay Contest reveal just this; these writers are individuals whose struggles all can relate to, and whose triumphs we all applaud.
At just 14 years old, Caroline Smith has gone through the challenge of understanding and revealing her LGBTQ identity. From Morrisville, N.C., Smith is a young bisexual who hasn’t always felt comfortable with labels. Her tale of confusion and final acceptance reveals something the LGBTQ community may do well to remember: we must not exclude or forget our questioning youth.
In her 20 years of life, Lux Cuellar of Charlotte, N.C., reflects on her transition and how it connects her to historical transfeminine figures throughout millennia of human existence. With brilliant intellect, Cuellar examines different perceptions of transgender people throughout the ages — and the connection provides empowerment, strength, and understanding.
Coming of Age by Caroline Smith
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Part of the reason I didn’t want to use the label bisexual is 016 was a very interesting year, to say the least. Our country because bi and pan people are often seen as “not gay enough” was very politically divided, and our presidential election for the LGBT community, especially those who are in a relationproved that unfortunately sometimes, hate does win. 2016 was ship with someone of a different gender. It’s almost as if the B in also the year that I had a shocking realization: I liked girls. LGBT doesn’t exist to some queer people. On the other hand, I This thought first really crossed my mind in summer of 2016. I didn’t want to make my straight friends uncomfortable by telling found myself noticing and becoming more and more attracted to them I liked girls, or talking about girls with them. girls. It’s difficult for me to pinpoint the first crush on a girl I ever I eventually became more comfortable with identifying as had, because looking back I think that I’ve always been attracted bisexual, and decided that I wouldn’t let some of to both genders, even from a the stereotypes stop me from being proud of who young age. ❝ …being LGBT, especially as a I am. I came out to my parents and best friend in I first heard terms like bisexuteenager can be very frustrating, but January of 2017, and I could not have asked for a al and pansexual when I became I am very lucky to be surrounded by better support system. more involved with the feminist (for the most part) supportive people, I feel so much more comfortable not having movement, and its concept. and I know that other LGBT people to hide that part of myself from them, and being While I don’t agree with some and allies will also be there for me. ❞ able to discuss it openly, something that I know of the ideology of mainstream — Caroline Smith I am very lucky to have. feminism, I think several feminist I also had the privilege to attend an LGBT youth camp in resources, such as blogs, have done an excellent job at bringing March of 2017. I was able to talk with other queer teens about to light some of the issues and oppressions that minorities face, their experiences, and I learned things about like trans-inclusive especially for the LGBT community and women of color. terminology, and how to be an activist in my community. Being Summer of 2016 was both amazing and confusing. I had so able to hear and share things with other queer youth in such an many new experiences and met new people. However, I still inclusive and open-minded environment was such a wonderful couldn’t shake this thought that maybe I wasn’t straight. Was I a experience, especially given that I came out fairly recently. lesbian, bi, straight and just going through a phase? I didn’t know, Learning to embrace my identity fully is something that I and it took me pretty much the rest of the year to decide what am still working on. Our current political situation and some of label I was comfortable with, or if I even wanted to use one at all.
the people who support it have shown that homophobia and transphobia still exist in the world, so I am still very cautious about who I open up to. However, I know that I have my parents, as well as other LGBT people and allies that accept me, and are just as passionate about equality as I am. I would love to see queer spaces be more inclusive of those who are questioning their sexuality or gender identity. I’ve noticed the first thing I am asked in queer spaces or forums is, “what is your name, and how do you identify?” While that could be an important question to ask, I know that there was a time for me personally where I didn’t really know how to answer that question. Plus, not everyone wants to label themselves, just sayin’. In short, being LGBT, especially as a teenager can be very frustrating, but I am very lucky to be surrounded by (for the most part) supportive people, and I know that other LGBT people and allies will also be there for me. Being bisexual does not define me, but it is a huge part of me that I am, and always will be proud of. : :
Taking Pride in the Threshold, an essay on Transfeminine Liminality by Lux Cuellar
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activities such as male-only sweat lodge ceremonies. However, ome decades after Christianity became the sole Imperial they may also take on “feminine” activities such as cooking and religion, St Augustine saw Galli “parading though the squares other domestic responsibilities. and streets of Carthage, with oiled hair and powdered faces, In South Asia, particularly India and Pakistan, transfeminine languid limbs and feminine gait, demanding even from the tradesindividuals are referred to as Hijra.Hijras have a recorded history in people the means of continuing to live in disgrace.”— The City of the Indian subcontinent from antiquity onwards as suggested by the God Against the Pagans by St. Augustine Kama Sutra period. This history features a number of well-known There is a stark cognitive dissonance regarding the perception roles within subcontinental cultures, part gender-liminal, part spiriof transgender women in this world. Across continents, we are situal and part survival. In South Asia, many hijras live in well-defined multaneously regarded as spiritual guides and reviled as unnatural and organized all-hijra communities, led by a guru.These communifrauds. Since ancient times, transfeminine people have held status ties have sustained themselves over generations by “adopting” as leaders and priestesses, known for inhabiting a physical and boys who are in abject poverty, rejected by, or flee, their family of spiritual liminal space. In Ancient Rome, the Gallai were a group of origin. Many hijra work as sex workers for survival. transgender priestesses dedicated to the Cybelline mystery cult. In In Western cultures, transgender women are seen as artifice lieu of hormones, these ancient priestesses castrated themselves by many people, at best a crude imitation of true womanhood,” and lived their lives out as women, begging for alms and staring into at worst an abhorrence. My own state has passed the future. legislature barring me from public spaces open to evIn modern times, ❝ …I found that for me, personally, a eryone else, for fear that I will cause harm to women there are other full face of Maybelline is easier to breathe and children. In my opinion, the root of transmisogyny, examples of sacred in than a masculine masquerade that has the oppression of trans women and transfeminine transfeminine genders. long come to an end. ❞ people, is a misguided notion that we are actually Historically in Native — Lux Cuellar “just men wearing dresses.” Trans women, specifiAmerican cultures, cally those of color, face a greater rate of violence because of the presence of transfeminine two-spirits “was a fundamenthis notion, both from strangers and intimate heterosexual male tal institution among most tribal peoples,” according to Brian partners smothered by the shame and stigma placed on them for Gilley and, according to non-Native anthropologist Will Roscoe, having the audacity to love us. It is fatiguing to know that to many transfeminine and transmasculine two-spirits have been docupeople I am considered fundamentally unloveable due to external mented “in over 130 North American tribes, in every region of circumstances that are completely out of my control, but I take the continent.” Transfeminine two spirit people, regardless of immense pride in my transfeminine identity. gender identification, can go to war and have access to male
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I am a twenty-year-old Salvadorena transgender woman currently living in Charlotte, North Carolina. In anthropology, liminality (from the Latin word limen, meaning “a threshold”) is the quality of ambiguity or disorientation that occurs in the middle stage of rituals, when participants no longer hold their pre-ritual status but have not yet begun the transition to the status they will hold when the ritual is complete. During a ritual’s liminal stage, participants “stand at the threshold” between their previous way of structuring their identity, time or community, and a new way, which the ritual establishes. My own transition has felt like a liminal space, my rituals marked by self-awareness and a daily dose of 8 mg of synthetic estrogen, biohacking my own endocrine system in order to shift the structure of my body into something more truthful. Although some days this body feels like a raincheck, a blueprint, a hastily scribbled “IOU” note promising a distant future, the sacred legacy and strength of spirit that lies inherent in my own womanhood is a source of great pride. Trans womanhood is transcendent, standing at the crossroads of various stigmatized identities, marking our beauty as a fixed rebellion against violent masculinity and patriarchy. I found that for me, personally, a full face of Maybelline is easier to breathe in than a masculine masquerade that has long come to an end. : :
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LGBTQ Youth
Youth of the LGBTQ community lead by example Two trans teens live their truth, plan to fight for rights compiled by Maria Dominguez :: qnotes staff
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hose who advocate for the LGBTQ community often cite the vulnerability of its youth. While it’s true that queer young people are vulnerable — with higher rates of bullying and suicide — what is not often acknowledged is the incredible strength that LGBTQ young people have. It takes guts to be true to oneself in spite of the harsh criticism, even hate, that queer people face. Two transgender teens spoke to qnotes about what it means to be young, out and proud. Vinnie Holt, 15, came out as transgender in August of 2015. Holt’s emotional intelligence is apparent when he talks about the stages of his transition. “I think there are two very different versions of being ‘out’ as a trans person,” Holt said. “There’s the first round of coming out, right when you begin your personal transition, which does not always equal medical procedures/treatments … I also believe there was a second round of being outed and coming out, when people who thought I was a cis guy find out that I’m trans.” Many LGBTQ youth face opposition on coming out, but this was luckily not the case for Dexter Robinson, 15. Robinson speaks of his transition as unexpectedly smooth, aided by a supportive parent and an advocacy organization. “I sat down with my mom and I was like ‘hey! I’m a boy’ and, of course, it took her a while to accept it, but now she’s supportive,” Robinson explains. “Ever since I started going [to Time Out Youth] they taught me how to be proud of being myself while building up social skills within a safe place. I’ve grown as a person and as a man so much within the eight months I’ve attended.” Not all LGBTQ youth have that support system so readily available, unfortunately. Holt and Robinson do not forget those youth, those disenfranchised and vulnerable. “I want my voice to be heard, in any way that it possibly can,” Holt said. “I want bigotry to be worked through on huge levels, and I want to be a part of that. I want to be hugely into advocacy
and activism, and I want to be the change that I want and see in the world.” For Robinson, one of the key issues that he wants to address is the way that LGBTQ youth are treated in schools. “Sometimes I hear about some youth being birthnamed in class by teachers or having teachers that refuse to use the right pronouns,” Robinson said. “Sex-ed only teaches Cis and straight people things. This is not OK because if a student doesn’t have connection to alternative resources to receive that information, they’re left uneducated which could result in things like diseases and illnesses that could’ve been avoided.” Both Holt and Robinson want to become the kind of advocates that they’ve known at Time Out Youth Center. “A big part of that [inspiration] is seeing queer and trans adults that I know be successful and happy with their lives without having to hide a part of them,” Holt said. “One of the previous staff members, who identified as non-binary, was one of my biggest inspirations ever. Seeing them living their life, being stable and working a paying job, being accepted by those around them gave me the confidence and persuasion to accept myself, thus allowing others to know who the true me was.”
But these young men recognize that the era and setting of their coming-of-age has an undeniable effect on their paths in life. In North Carolina in the age of HB2, transgender young people are perhaps the most vulnerable population in the state. “When I first heard about HB2 I was devastated, I felt unprotected and scared,” Robinson admits. “Then I saw all these queer people come to me telling me what policies were put in place to protect me. Then Trump became the new president of the United States and I felt isolated and powerless. Then the queer community got together and brainstormed ways to fight back and get stuff done within our government. I just [saw] the powerful strong part of the community, and it made me love being me. We came together and showed each other that we cared and that we’re here, and I love it!” “Growing up in North Carolina has made a lot [of] things harder for me, but has also made me know that I have to push even harder,” Holt said. “I believe in LGBTQIA+ people. I believe we are the future. We are changing so many things in so many different ways, and I strongly believe there is even more to come … I look at myself, my peers. I look at everything that we’ve done, all the change that we’ve made, and in that moment I think, and I know — that there isn’t anyone else who could do these things.” : : Illustration Credit: Lorelyn Medina via Adobe Stock
TOY receives gift from Baptist church $100,000 given to support the center’s work, growth and initiatives by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Myers Park Baptist Church, 1900 Queens Rd., has gifted $100,000 to Time Out Youth Center (TOY). The funds will be used to support the center’s new facility up-fitting and renovation, as well as to build a shelter for 10-12 homeless youths. The center’s executive director Rodney Tucker said that vulnerable LGBTQ youth may “face tremendous cruelty and abuse” at home or even be kicked out of their homes, and the need for a permanent shelter is acute. TOY’s client visits doubled in 2016 over the year before, largely due to the debate over HB2.” “This is a remarkable gift and statement on inclusion of LGBTQ community in a truly welcoming and affirming congregation,” Tucker told the Baptist News Global. Time Out Youth wants to start construction on the shelter in 2019 and have it completed the in the following year. Myers Park provided meeting space for the organization 20 years ago when it was being formed. Scott Crowder, one of the church’s members and part of its outreach ministry said that it
was “called to support and protect those who are at risk, dehumanized or excluded.” It has a long history of progressive social involvement, sponsors an LGBTQ fellowship group, is a welcoming and affirming church and has been a staunch supporter of LGBTQ rights, the Baptist News Global reported. In other news, Time Out Youth announced that new grants are available for regional gay-straight alliance (GSA) studentled organizations in middle and high schools. The purpose of the Time Out Youth GSA Network Grant is to provide funding to student groups that are working toward improving campus climate and LGBTQ visibility and inclusion in schools through advocacy and awareness events, projects and meetings, the organization shared. “We are thrilled to provide support to GSA’s in the region through funding so we can empower students to continue creating more welcoming school environments,” said Rebby Kern, assistant director of school outreach. “Our goal is to provide GSA’s access to funds for student-led programming and LGBTQ awareness events for their school.”
The grants are available to use during the 2016-17 school year and applications will reopen in the summer for the 2017-18 academic school year. To apply, visit timeoutyouth.org/youth/gsa-grants. Eligible schools must have an active advisor or sponsor to the GSA and be an approved student-led club on campus. The proposed project must reach an objective to improve campus climate and bring awareness to LGBTQ issues. Priority will be given to projects that engage with issues facing marginalized communities, including transgender and gender-expansive students, LGBTQ youth of color, LGBTQ students with disabilities and undocumented LGBTQ youth. Through the School Outreach program, the center is able to reach and support 68 GSA’s in seven counties, including Mecklenburg, Cabarrus, Gaston, Iredell, Union, Lincoln and York (SC). The department also provides regional and statewide professional development for K-12 educators and school personnel on LGBTQ topics in order to create more welcoming school environments. info: timeoutyouth.org.
National Youth HIV & Awareness Day — April 10
Today’s youth are the first generation that has never known a world without HIV/AIDS. In the U.S., almost 40 percent of new infections are of youth ages 13-29. Get the facts! Stop the pandemic! Visit aids.gov or advocatesforyouth.org to learn more. April 7-20 . 2017
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LGBTQ Youth
Support groups provide community for LGBTQ young individuals and allies Carolinas offers hope for impressionable, vulnerable youth by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff
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he Carolinas, as well as the U.S., are filled with scores of LGBTQ-focused support and family groups to provide a shoulder or welcoming arms for those in the community who seek the solace of safety. For students, gay-straight alliances have been a key component to make an uncomfortable situation more palatable. Not only are they front and center for them while they are engaged in their academic endeavors, but they provide a social outlet as well. •••••
Gay-Straight Alliance Network contacts for both North and South Carolina are: Time Out Youth GSA Network Charlotte, N.C. timeoutyouth.org. South Carolina GSA Network Columbia, S.C. scequality.org. These two organizations will also have other youth-related resources available for those who seek other options. ••••• Other organizations that help to support youth, both regionally and nationally are:
ASPYRE Youth Leadership Camp The mission of the A Safer Place for Youth to Reach for Excellence (ASPYRE) Leadership Camp is to empower young members of the LGBTQ community and their allies to achieve personal growth through advocacy and activism while making a positive impact in their communities. A program of the LGBT Community Center of Raleigh. bit.ly/2gv1cNn. Campus Pride National organization supporting secondary and post-secondary students. campuspride.org. Gay Straight Advocates for Education Greensboro Organization dedicated to supporting LGBTQIA youth with an emphasis on creating safe educational environments for ALL youth. gsafe.org. GLSEN Leading national education organization focused on ensuring safe schools for all students. glsen.org. iNSIDEoUT & Upsidedown A youth-led and youth-founded organization located in the Triangle. Supports two difference age groups. insideout180.org. insideout180.org/upsidedown.
It Gets Better Project The It Gets Better Project’s mission is to communicate to LGBTQ youth around the world that it gets better, and to create and inspire the changes needed to make it better for them. itgetsbetter.org. LGBT Y outh Allies An online resource that provides information on LGBTQ youth organizations nationwide. youthallies.com. Matthew Shepard Foundation Matthew’s Place An online community designed to provide support to teens and young adults within sexual orientation and gender identity minorities as well as their allies. matthewsplace.com. National Safe Place Program An outreach program designed to provide access to immediate help and safety for all youth in crisis. nationalsafeplace.org. North Star LGBTQ Community Center Youth Programs The center provides a safe space for LGBTQ youth 24 and younger to get connected and empowered. Its purpose is to build a strong queer, youth community through education, creative and performing arts, and community events. bit.ly/2mWZQOo.
This list is not fully comprehensive and qnotes welcomes input so that the list provides accurate information and current resources to remain its integrity. Email editor@goqnotes.com to make changes or additions.
Photo Credit: luckybusiness via Adobe Stock
OUTright Youth of Catawba Valley Provides a safe environment for LGBTQ youth and their allies. outrightyouthcv.org. PRISM Charlotte Provides a safe social space for LGBTQ young adults in the Charlotte area. prismclt.tumblr.com. QORDS Queer Oriented Radical Days of Summer (QORDS) empowers Southern queer and transgender youth to build community through music. It is a vehicle for expressing gender and sexuality, and harbors an environment of self-discovery and social change. It hosts a summer camp program. qords.org. Queer Lab Elsewhere Museum provides a youth-led media program exploring LGBTQ experience in North Carolina. It publishes I Don’t Do Boxes, a youth-focused zine dedicated to presenting stories of LGBTQ experience in the South. goelsewhere.org/queerlab. Queer NC Connects youth in rural and urban areas of N.C. by providing a safe space both online and in person for teens to talk about their ideas, find resources and get help with problems that they face. A program of the LGBT Community Center of Raleigh. bit.ly/2nFMxz3. Safe Schools NC A statewide group focused on training school professionals to work effectively with LGBTQ students. safeschoolsnc.org. Time Out Youth Center The Queen City’s resource and support center for youth education, empowerment and more. timeoutyouth.org. The Trevor Project Leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBT) young people. thetrevorproject.org. Youth OUTLOUD A safe space for LGBTQ youth and their allies in the Midlands, S.C. area. harriethancockcenter.org/yol. Youth OUTright Youth advocacy and leadership organization located in Western North Carolina. youthoutright.org. YouthSAFE A Greensboro-based organization provides an environment for LGBTQIA youth to find community, share resources and build skills for responding creatively to the world around them. youthsafegso.org.
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••••• Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) groups are also an asset in helping the community to provide much-needed support and education for those who would otherwise lack the guidance and camaraderie so necessary when raising an LGBT child. They also serve as organizations that advocate for equal rights. PFLAG chapters in North Carolina are: PFLAG Alamance Elon, N.C. pflagalamance.org. PFLAG Charlotte Charlotte, N.C. pflagcharlotte.org. PFLAG Concord/Kannapolis Kannapolis, NC ckpflag@gmail.com. PFLAG Flat Rock/Hendersonville Flat Rock, N.C. community.pflag.org/flatrockhendersonville. PFLAG Gaston Gastonia, N.C. pflaggaston.org. PFLAG Greensboro Greensboro, N.C. pflaggreensboro.org. PFLAG Greenville Greenville, N.C. pflag@outgreenville.com. PFLAG Hickory Hickory, N.C. pflaghickory@gmail.com.
PFLAG Salisbury/ Rowan Salisbury, N.C. facebook.com/salisburyrowan.pflag.
Gender Equity Center Johnson & Wales University jwu.edu/content.aspx?id=62480.
LGBTQ Center Wake Forest University lgbtq.wfu.edu.
PFLAG Wilmington/Cape Fear Wilmington, N.C. pflagwilmingtonnc.org.
GLoBAL Winthrop University winthrop.edu/studentorgs/ default.aspx?id=6197.
Multicultural Resource Center UNC Charlotte mrc.uncc.edu.
PFLAG Winston-Salem Winston Salem, N.C. pflagws.org. PFLAG chapter in South Carolina are:
GLBT Center North Carolina State University ncsu.edu/glbt.
PFLAG Aiken Aiken, S.C. pflagaiken.org.
GLBTQA Resource Center Guilford College guilford.edu/academics/multicultural-ed/ bayard-rustin-center/index.aspx.
PFLAG Columbia Columbia, S.C. cola.pflag@gmail.com.
Henderson Springs LGBT Center Appalachian State University lgbt.appstate.edu.
PFLAG Greenville Greer, S.C. pflagupstatesc.org.
Sexuality and Gender Alliance Western Carolina University orgsync.com/97391/chapter. LGBT Center University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill lgbtq.unc.edu.
PFLAG Spartanburg Spartanburg, S.C. pflagupstatesc.org. ••••• University LGBTQ support and resource center programs and organizations offered across the Carolinas for their LGBTQ sudents, allies and staff are:
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Pride University of North Carolina at Greensboro bit.ly/2oqbOjP. Safe Queens University safequeensgsa.wordpress.com.
LGBT Resource Center East Carolina University ecu.edu/cs-cas/lgbt/. LGBTQ Resource Center North Carolina Central University nccu.edu/lgbta/.
Alliance University of North Carolina at Asheville facebook.com/groups/AllianceUNCA. CPCC Spectrum Club facebook.com/groups/CPCCSpectrum.
PFLAG High Point High Point, N.C facebook.com/pflag.highpoint.
LGBT Legal Society Charlotte School of Law bnicholson@charlottelaw.edu.
PFLAG Lenoir Lenoir, N.C. pflagcaldwellcounty@gmail.com.
Duke LGBT Network Duke University studentaffairs.duke.edu/csgd.
PFLAG Raleigh-Durham/Triangle Durham, N.C. pflagtriangle.org.
LGBTQA Community Resources Davidson College http://bit.ly/2nx22rX.
PFLAG Rocky Mount Rocky Mount, N.C. pflagrm@aol.com.
Gender & LGBTQIA Center Elon University elon.edu/e-web/students/lgbtq/.
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Fighting for life
LGBTQ immigrants, already at risk, suffer under new immigration policies Will the LGBTQ community fight for its immigrant family? by Maria Dominguez :: qnotes staff
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eing LGBTQ is enough of a challenge in the current political climate, but being LGBTQ and an immigrant brings even more tribulations. Within a presidential administration that promises persecution — and prosecution — of immigrants, those in the LGBTQ community who fight for immigrants’ rights have an uphill battle ahead. In North Carolina, the battle is fierce. Our state has the thirdhighest rate in the U.S. of deportation, with 67.6 percent of those arrested being deported, according to Syracuse University’s Immigration Tracker. The national average in 2016 was 43.3 percent of those arrested by ICE being deported. The risk of deportation is all too real to Gustavo “Gus” Zamudio, a gay teen immigrant whose education at Charlotte, N.C.’s Northwest School of the Arts was put on hold when he was arrested and threatened with deportation. Zamudio, who immigrated from Mexico at age five, was charged with embezzling from his job at Harris Teeter. Though a legal immigrant, Zamudio’s criminal charges put him at risk for deportation. This might not have been the case before the Trump administration issued executive orders amending the nation’s immigration laws, according to Jackie Yodashkin, the public affairs
director of Immigration Equality, a New York-based nonprofit that aims to help LGBTQ and HIV-positive immigrants “Two orders made some pretty drastic changes about who was a priority in enforcement, and in some ways dismantled the previous enforcement priorities from the Obama administration, making almost everyone a priority for removal,” Yodashkin told qnotes. For Zamudio, these changes meant that his deportation could be initiated the moment he was charged with a crime — charged, not convicted. Devyn Bauer, a 17-year-old friend of Zamudio, traveled to Georgia for his bond hearing. “The first thing that happened when we walked in is Gus said my name and it was extremely hard not for me to break down right there,” Bauer told WBTV. But Zamudio’s case is not unique. “Removal orders” may include deportation or exclusion and prevent individuals from returning to the U.S., sometimes permanently. North Carolina has the 10th-highest percentage of removal orders, with 894 individual removals so far in 2017. Syracuse’s tracker notes that the new presidential administration is ramping up its pursuit of immigrants.
“Court records reveal that so far, since Trump assumed office, a total of 11,040 cases have been initiated by DHS seeking removal orders,” the site reads. “The court is now seeing many more cases where the individual was detained at the time the case is filed, and fewer non-detained cases.” So what does detainment mean for immigrants who identify as LGBTQ? Yodaskin says that being detained can be traumatic and may risk physical harm, especially for transgender women. “Immigration detention is terrible for everyone, [but] for trans women it is really dangerous,” Yodashkin said. “Trans women are detained with men. They face brutal abuse and violence and sexual assault in immigration detention.” Yodashkin’s organization, Immigration Equality, wants to see policy changes that will protect LGBTQ immigrants, and offers them legal help. However, the road to change is rocky, due to the understated nature of the problem. “We’ve asked the government to track how many people seek asylum who are LGBTQ/HIV+ and the government just doesn’t do that,” she said. “Even quantifying how many people are seeking asylum because of their sexual orientation or gender identity is not possible because that data just doesn’t exist.
❝ The first thing that happened when we walked in [the court room] is Gus said my name and it was extremely hard not for me to break down right there. … He looked at us [after the hearing] like we were leaving him forever and that was the most painful thing that I’ll ever have to experience. ❞ — Devyn Bauer, friend of Gustavo “Gus” Zamudio
Devyn Bauer, pictured in a video still where she spoke to the media after a court procedings, traveled to Georgia to support Gustavo Zamudio. She expressed how heartbreaking the environment was for the other boys there who had no one to stand by them. Photo Credit: Braxton Winston, The Charlotte Observer
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Besides that, with undocumented folk who are living in the shadows, it’s really hard to quantify how many people might be out there.” Though accurate numbers don’t exist, Yodashkin says that Immigration Equality receives thousands of requests for aid every year and currently has over 650 active cases in their network. “A lot of the people who come through our doors are from one of the almost 80 countries worldwide where it’s a crime to be LGBTQ, and we know that even more are fundamentally unsafe,” she said. But the fight doesn’t end with asylum being granted to an LGBTQ immigrant. “One thing we see a lot is families being separated … The [legal] definition of family is a spouse, not a partner. But if you’re in Uganda, it’s very difficult to marry your partner.” The problems LGBTQ folks face in immigration courts aren’t simple, either. According to one attorney at an immigration law clinic (who wished to remain nameless), even the U.S. courts may not offer relief from prejudice. “Adjudicators might have different biases depending on their own experiences. There’s the perception that people from some countries have stronger cases or have more ‘truthful’ cases than people from other countries,” he said. “That bias [against LGBTQ people] exists in society as a whole, so it’s fair to say that it obviously impacts adjudicators.” “Immigration judges currently to my knowledge don’t receive any kind of cul-
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But once past the courts, assimilating into the culture of the U.S. isn’t easy. Assuming the immigrants somehow supported themselves through the six-month moratorium wherein they cannot legally work, finding work is a significant challenge. “We end up with the intersection of discrimination,” Yodashkin said. “People are hesitant to hire someone who is queer or HIV positive, they may have concerns over hiring an immigrant, and so when you work with these overlapping identities, particularly if you’re a person of color or a trans person or gender nonconforming, it all makes it that much more challenging to find steady employment.” Past all these obstacles — having completed the legal immigration process, assimilated to a new culture, and found employment — Gus Zamudio’s trials are not over yet. His lawyers advised him to plead for a lesser charge, and they hoped that his deportation can be delayed long enough for Zamudio to A GoFundMe page was established to help Gustavo “Gus” finish high school. Zamudio in his quest to remain in the U.S. Recently, an immigration judge tural competency training on LGBTQ rights,” ruled that Zamudio, having been sucYodashkin said. “We’ve seen judges equating cessful with a “prayer for justice” that isn’t a sexual orientation and gender identity in a way technical conviction, must voluntarily leave the that’s really problematic…a judge had ruled country but may apply for a visa to return to the that a trans woman should not receive asylum United States. Another friend who attended his because it was legal for gay people to get bond hearing told WBTV that Zamudio seemed married in Mexico, so therefore she would be deeply unhappy. fine in Mexico. The judge threw out the case, “He looked at us like we were leaving him misgendered her, and clearly didn’t understand forever and that was the most painful thing that what it was to be a trans person.” I’ll ever have to experience.” : :
Knowledge Base
Biz network speaker shares immigration truth = by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff
RALEIGH, N.C. — The Raleigh Business and Professional Network will hold its monthly meeting on April 12, 6 p.m., at Cantina 18, 433 Daniels St. Topic for the evening program will be “The Value of the Hispanic Immigration,” with Mexican immigrant and Triangle businesswoman Elsa Maria JimenezSalgado serving as speaker. She will provide inside information on the facts surrounding issues pertaining to the Hispanic community. She will share the true definition of “Hispanic,” the economic impact of Hispanics on the economy, the vast marketing opportunity available to businesses in the Hispanic community and the true, hard data about immigration today. Instead of relying on “fake news,” she will provide attendees with the real truth! Jimenez-Salgado received her law degree from the Universidad Iberoamericana in Leon, Mexico prior to immigrating to the U.S. Since then she completed an Executive Graduate Certification in Business and Administration with a concentration in Human Resource Management. She spent four years at the Mexican Consulate in Raleigh, N.C. and is now an associate with Total Engagement
Consulting by Kimer. She also runs her own translation business. Seating is limited to 45, so reserve seats quickly online. A fajita bar banquet will be the menu fare for the meeting. info: raleighnetwork.org.
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news notes: carolinas compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff
Charlotte Theatre affinity group hosts event
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Blumenthal Performing Arts LGBTQ Out on the Town affinity group will host a pre-show party before the performance of “Hedwig and The Angry Inch” on April 13, 6 p.m., at Knight Theatre VIP Room, 430 S. Tryon St. To attend, RSVP to bcarter@ncbpac.org. To secure tickets, visit the theatre website. Tickets range from $29.50-$99.50 when using the promotional code HEDWIG8 and are available online. info: blumenthalarts.org.
Fund soirée slated
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Charlotte Lesbian and Gay Fund will hold an after-work meet up on April 13, 5:30 p.m., at Vivace, 1100 Metropolitan Ave. #100. Light hors d’oeuvres will be provided along with a cash bar. No RSVP is required. info: fftc.org/clgf.
HOM AIDS walk raises funds
BELMONT, N.C. — The House of Mercy’s 2017 Walk for AIDS will be held on April 22, 9:30 a.m.-12 p.m., at the Sisters of Mercy Campus, 500 Mercy Dr. The annual event raises AIDS awareness and supports the residential facility which provides compassionate care for low-income individuals living with AIDS. The Sisters hope to raise $41,500 while they celebrate 26 years of service. The first 300 participants raising $50 or more will receive a free Walk for AIDS T-shirt. A picnic reception with a DJ and dancing follows the walk on the House of Mercy grounds. Free STD/HIV testing will be offered. For more information or to sign up to participate, visit the House of Mercy’s website. info: thehouseofmercy.org.
Center seeks survey participants
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Freedom Center for Social Justice is seeking participants for its intergenerational work initiative. Organizers from the center launched a listening session project across the various regions and communities of North Carolina. It engaged in “intentional conversations” to better understand intergenerational group dynamics in the community organizing efforts of its partners. As it delved deeper into these listenings, the guiding question that emerged was: In what ways do ideological differences contribute most to the barriers of sustainable intergenerational work, genuine collaborative spirits, and effective coalition building? What they are seeking to learn from the survey is how to better understand attitudes, challenges and successes in intergenerational/ intersectional social movement organizing. Their goal is to obtain 500 completed surveys with a time investment of approximately 5-10 minutes. It is available online at /goo.gl/forms/ QfAoxCC0fDOyLc6q2. The poll closes April 7. In other news, the center welcomed new staff members Sam Poler and Lara Americo to its team. Poler will serve with headquarters administration and Americo will head up the “Yes, You Can Go” street teams across the state, as well as those of Charlotte/Gastonia. The center is also hiring street team temporary/contract
workers in the Triangle and Charlotte areas. More information is available online, along with application support. info: fcsj.org.
Design wins org competition, honors Pulse victims
CHARLOTTE, N.C.— A University of North Carolina at Charlotte School of Architecture team of faculty and students has won the 2017 American Institute of Architects (AIA) Small Project Practitioners (SPP) Small Project Design Competition. The team is made up of architecture professors Marc Manack and Rachel Dickey, Director of Fabrication Labs Alex Cabral, Fabrication Labs Manager and Lecturer McKenzie Canaday and students Jon Warner and Elizabeth Shue. The winning entry will be constructed and showcased at the AIA Conference on Architecture 2017 in Orlando, Fla. from April 27-29. The competition challenged participants to design a temporary structure for a 10 feet by 10 feet by 8 feet space that could be easily and inexpensively built. The theme for the competition was “reflection,” and projects had to evoke a strong sense of place by encouraging human interaction. Acknowledging the location of the AIA national convention, the winning submission, EFFERVESCE, a plastic lattice wall that will stand in the middle of the installation site, responds to the Pulse nightclub shooting in June 2016. Within the wall’s structure are 49 “vessels,” one for each life lost in the shooting. Each of these modules will contain a simple mechanism with plunger, siphon and bubble wand, allowing visitors to release bubbles into the air, creating a moment of joy in remembrance of the Pulse shooting victims. The names of the 49 will be subtly inscribed into the structure. “Rather than a monument, this memorial is an encounter and an event — a place of interaction and contemplation amid the commotion of the convention environment,” the team wrote in the design proposal. The elements of EFFERVESCE will be fabricated in the School of Architecture fabrication labs prior to the convention, then assembled at the convention site on April 26. A session on April 28 will allow the team to present their design concept. Following the convention, the team will donate EFFERVESCE to the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Community Center of Central Florida. Sponsored by AIA National, the SPP Small Project Design Competition is open to architects, associate architects and architecture students. info: coaa.uncc.edu.
Trans org gets community grant
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Transcend Charlotte was the recipient of a $5,000 grant given by the Unite Charlotte fund. The fund was created in response to the civic unrest in Charlotte, N.C. last fall. Led by initial grants from Wells Fargo and Duke Energy, and facilitated by United Way and Foundation For The Carolinas, the fund supports programs and organizations focused on community healing, rebuilding trust and creating opportunities in Mecklenburg County. Unite Charlotte funders include Wells Fargo ($250,000), Knight Foundation ($150,000), Duke Energy ($100,000), Walmart Foundation ($50,000), Elevation Church ($25,000),
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Minister receives PFLAG award CONCORD/KANNAPOLIS, N.C. — Concord/Kannapolis Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays has announced that Rev. Nathan King has received its 2017 ConcordKannapolis PFLAG Advocacy Award which was presented to him by board member Don Gale at the March 18 fundraising banquet. King grew up in Chatham County in Bonlee, N.C. and has been in Christian ministry since he was 18 years old. He serves as pastor at Trinity United Church of Christ in Concord, N.C. He first became involved with PFLAG in RowanSalisbury several years ago where he attended meetings with several church members, he said. “I spoke at meetings occasionally on the topic of what the Bible really says about being LGBT. Our church facility currently hosts the Concord/Kannapolis PFLAG now in its third year. I also advocated for a PFLAG entry into the Concord Christmas Parade this past year,” King shared. His church has been at the forefront of acceptance and inclusion. King said that “acceptance and inclusion permeate everything” they do as Trinity UCC. “From the people who greet you when you come in our doors the first time, to our presence with booths at Charlotte and Salisbury Prides the past eight years, to Sunday school discussions, to sermons, and our Sunday morning hugfest (also known as the Passing of the Peace), acceptance and inclusion are a part of who we are as people who follow the way of Jesus.” When asked if he had an LGBTQ child or family member and what propels him to advocate for the LGBTQ community, King said, “I’m sure I have LGBTQ family members though none of them have ever disclosed their sexual identity to me. Really there are two greatly inspiring reasons for my advocacy. One is the people I know who are friends who may also identify as LGBTQIA. I love them. The other inspiration is my faith in Jesus Christ. Jesus’ way of being in the world was to be compassionate and accepting with all, and especially those who are cast aside and cast out because of their identity. Advocating for the rights of people who are treated as ‘other’ is essence of the justice the Gospel of Christ always brings.” He is an accepting man and said, “Through the voices and lives of many beautiful and wonderful people in my life who have been, and are LGBT, the voice of God has come. And through deep study of Christian scriptures, the voice of God has come. And my journey to accept and embrace people of all identities has happened over many experiences.” Events that shaped his life in serving others came from early childhood where he was exposed to a helping church life. And, that has carried well into his adulthood. “I grew up going to a church where helping others was part and parcel of what it meant to believe in God. People often think Jesus was a leader. And he was. But his leadership was most fully recognized in his being a servant. In the United Church of Christ we have a saying: To believe is to care. To care is to do. Faith and action go hand in hand. And action is about serving others and doing justice. It is the call to Do Justice, Love Kindness, and Walk Humbly with God that most shapes my work and service. That, and, I just love people! I love people who wear their hair differently, who are a different color, or ethnicity, or sexual identity, or who believe differently than I believe. I love the diversity that God has created and I believe everyone is a person of worth created in the image of a loving God, to relate and live as Christ lived.” The event included a spaghetti dinner, silent auction, raffle and a concert by the Gay Men’s Chorus of Charlotte. After expenses, the organization cleared $2,600 and will use the funds for the chapter’s mission to educate, support and advocate for the LGBTQ community. Nominees (individuals, groups or organizations) for the award are made by the organization’s membership or regular attendees at meetings and events. Selection is based upon demonstrated leadership excellence and/or high visibility within the local LGBTQ community; contributions to creating a culture where the local LGBTQ community is supported and embraced; and affiliation with and/or active support for local LGBTQ organizations. info: pflag.org/chapter/pflag-concordkannapolis.
Foundation For The Carolinas ($25,000), Charlotte WILL ($10,000) and Clariant ($10,000). Sean Garrett, United Way’s executive director said, “After listening to people affected by Charlotte’s lack of opportunity, Unite Charlotte is investing in ideas positioned to address the community’s issues in innovative ways. Our region’s challenges go back generations, so there is no quick fix, but it’s a path forward in creating new solutions.” Trey Greene, MSW, LCSWA, the co-founder and executive director of Transcend Charlotte said that he was excited to read about the grant when he heard about it through a professor at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. Greene felt that the grant “perfectly aligned with the mission that was behind Transcend Charlotte, the idea of coming together with other people and organizations to fight for more safe spaces, for social justice for people regardless of their identity, experiences, or beliefs.”
With only two weeks to prepare the application before the deadline in February, Greene worked quickly to pull it together. And, he is glad he did. His organization had “been looking for some funding to help with [the] move into Time Out Youth’s space and improving [its] ability to provide quality services. This grant will be used primarily towards that end,” Greene added. “Being in Time Out Youth’s space will allow youth to have access to our closet, more hours of access for the community in general, and it will create more opportunities for youth who age out of Time Out Youth’s programs to get to know us and know that there are adult resources and groups available. We are working on upgrading the TransCloset to add more basic needs items such as hygiene products and toiletries for adults in the community who may be homeless or don’t have resources to buy the things they need. We
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News Notes continued from page 15 are also working on improving our support group and workshops services. With the latter, we are getting an increasing number of requests to do education in and out of state, so this funding can be used to assist us with being able to provide workshops when the recipients are unable to pay for travel and other expenses that may prevent us from being able to fulfill those needs.” Greene said. He concluded by saying, “We cannot express how much gratitude we feel towards United Way of the Central Carolinas for believing in the work we are doing and backing our efforts to improves the lives of transgender and gender nonconforming people in our community.” Additional Unite Charlotte grants are expected to be deployed after second-round applications open this summer. In the interim, United Way will work with applicants from the first round who had promising ideas but did not meet all the grant requirements. info: uwcentralcarolinas.org. transcendcharlotte.org.
Leaders net awards
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — On March 24, Carolinas CARE Partnership presented three awards to local community and healthcare leaders for finding, developing and funding the path to the AIDS-free generation in the region. T. Warren Wooten, AISC, a housing services operations manager for the City of Charlotte, received the Housing Champion Award for his
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efforts in advocating and solving problems focused on ending homelessness for those living with HIV/AIDS and the general population. Ballantyne Family Medicine was the recipient of the Collaborative Spirit Award. J. Wesley Thompson acted as the representative for the practice in accepting the award which was given to Ballantyne for bringing the vision of collaboration to fruition, and opening their doors to all organizations. The Trailblazer Award was presented to Dr. Ophelia Garmon-Brown, MD, senior vice president of community outreach, Novant Health and Dr. Alisahah Cole, Carolinas Healthcare System medical director for community health. They received the award for forging new paths in addressing health disparities and finding ways to change systems to work more effectively on behalf of those they serve. Together they laid the groundwork for the groundbreaking collaboration between Novant Health and Carolinas Healthcare System. info: carolinascare.org.
Triad Young Dems elect board
GREENSBORO, N.C. — The Young Democrats of North Carolina elected new officers at its recent convention on March 26 and the organization said that it was the most diverse in its history. Those elected were: Ebony West, Chapel Hill (president), Anne Evangelista, Greensboro (executive vice president), Colby Moore,
Greensboro (national committeeman), Rebekah Whilden, Asheville (national committeewoman), Anniken Williams, Greenville (secretary), Aja Gaul, Swannanoa (western regional vice president), Vonnie Brown, Charlotte (Piedmont regional vice president), Kriss Gomez, Raleigh (eastern regional vice president), Matt Hughes, Hillsborough (treasurer), and Khaetlyn Grindel, Winston-Salem (communications director.) The new leadership includes the first black woman ever elected president of the board. Other officers come from a variety of backgrounds representing differences in religion, ethnicity, sexuality and national origin. The convention was one of largest and most well-attended in recent history with over 150 in attendance. It was held in conjunction with the College and Teen Democrats of North Carolina. info: ydnc.org.
Triangle Pauli home historic site
DURHAM, N.C. — The childhood home, located at 906 Carroll St., of the National Organization for Women Co-founder Rev. Dr. Pauli Murray obtained designation as a National Historic Landmark and on April 1, a celebration was held which featured a plaque dedication ceremony. National Park Service representatives, Pauli Murray Project board, local and U.S. elected officials and other key supporters were in attendance.
During the festivities, tours of the neighborhood and the home’s interior were held, along with a community party, exhibits, arts activities and more, the organization shared. Pauli was an African-American civil rights activist, attorney, poet and clergy member. info: now.org.
South Carolina ASO expands services
ROCK HILL, S.C. —Affinity Health Center will hold a groundbreaking ceremony on April 25, 5:30 p.m., at 452 Lakeshore Pky. The new facility will be 30,000 sq. ft. of space designed to provide expanded access to primary care, pharmacy, dental, women’s health, counseling and health education services. A catered reception will be offered from 4:30-7 p.m. where attendees can meet the staff and hear stories from the center’s patients, as well as see plans for the facility. RSVP to Anita Case at acase@affinityhealthcenter.org to reserve a place for the event. In other news, the center will hold its Dazzle and Denim Deal Me In 2017 on May 12, 7 p.m., at The Magnolia Room, 4017 Laurel Creek Dr. The Vegas style event includes a live auction, wine pull and entertainment, plus dancing, open bar and heavy hors d’ouevres. Tickets are on sale online at bit.ly/2oxG09u and range from $60-$500. info: affinityhealthcenter.org.
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news
news notes: u.s./world compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff
Administration nixes LGBTQ data collection from 2020 census Americans is significantly undermined.” insignificant minority. Data collection allows for a WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Trump The National LGBTQ Task Force Criminal more detailed and accurate analysis of the costs Administration’s Department of Commerce’s and Economic Justice Project Director Meghan of discrimination. That’s something bigots want to U.S. Census Bureau has recently made the Maury stated, “We call on President Trump and keep under wraps because they know that data decision to remove data collection for conhis Administration to begin collecting sexual is a damning rebuke to their policies of hate and sideration on LGBTQ individuals from the 2020 orientation and gender identity data on the division. … Adding these questions should not Census and the American Community Survey. American Community Survey as soon as posbe viewed as a partisan or political task. Doing U.S. Sen. Tammy Baldwin, Rep. Adam Schiff sible and urge Congress to conduct oversight so merely acknowledges the fact that LGBT and Rep. Raúl M. Grijalva have led 86 members hearings to reveal why the Administration made people live in the United States and have unique of Congress in sending a bicameral letter to the the last-minute decision not to collect data on experiences and struggles. The data would also bureau’s director John Thompson and the diLGBTQ people.” The organization has an active help the federal government further fine-tune rector of the Office of Management and Budget petition asking for inclusion in the census. many of its major social policies and programs, Mick Mulvaney expressing disapproval. The Williams Institute shared that in addition which would in turn increase their efficiency and Thompson said that their review concluded to the census and survey, the Administration for effectiveness.” that there was no federal data need to change Community Living (ACL) of the U.S. Department The Williams Institute at the University of the planned census and survey subjects. of Health and Human According to Services is proposing Baldwin resources, the to remove a sexual federal government, orientation question states and local comfrom the 2017 version munities use census of the National Survey data to determine how of Older Americans Act to allocate resources Participants (NSOAAP) to meet the needs of and sexual orientation, certain populations. and gender identity “Despite this critical fields from the Annual mission, no comprehenProgram Performance sive federal population Report for Centers for survey currently asks Independent Living. Dr. respondents to share Kerith Conron, research their sexual orientation director of the institute, and gender identity, said, “By removing meaning that even the these questions, ACL most basic of statiswill blind itself to the extics — the number of The National LGBTQ Task Force has created a petition to ask for inclusion in the 2020 Census and the people who identify as American Community Survey. Currently, the LGBTQ question has been removed. It has been previously periences and needs of LGBT elders and people LGBTQ — is undeterproposed for inclusion. with disabilities.” minable.” Photo Credit: National LGBTQ Task Force Services & Rep. Grijalva Advocacy for LGBT Elders (SAGE) announced California, Los Angeles School of Law’s Federal and Sen. Baldwin introduced the LGBT Data that it is launching a nationwide effort to oppose Policy Director Adam Romero said, “Given Inclusion Act in 2016 which would have the Trump Administration’s proposed erasure another recent move to take such questions off a required federal agencies to collect the data. of LGBT elders from the NSOAAP. Specifically, federal survey and administrative form, there apRep. Schiff created a letter to the federal direcSAGE opposes changes that would eliminate pears to be a new policy or practice to exclude tors with demands to include LGBTQ individuquestions that allow the federal government to sexual orientation and gender identity measures als in the process. assess the extent to which LGBT older adults from federal data collection efforts.” At press The lawmakers are not the only ones who are receiving federally funded elder services. time, the institute planned to lead a discushave expressed disapproval and disappointLaura E. Durso, vice president for the sion on April 7 on “LGBT Rights and the Trump ment over the situation. Center for American Progress’s LGBT Research Administration and Changing the Landscape The National Association of Gay and Lesbian and Communications Project, issued a stateon Gender Identity Data Collection.” He added, Real Estate Professionals Policy Committee ment saying, “Governments have a responsibil“Without federal data on LGBT populations, the commented on the issue and said, “Data is so ity to ensure that social service programs meet ability of federal, state, and local governments powerful because it brings marginalized comthe needs of communities they aim to protect, to make evidence-based public policy that also munities out from the shadows and makes it especially vulnerable communities such as reflects the experiences and needs of LGBT harder to claim anti-LGBT laws will impact an
LGBT older adults. Policymakers cannot fulfill that responsibility without robust, quality data, which makes this action by the Trump administration an appalling step backward. Data collection is about more than numbers on a page. Without data, we can’t know whether HHS is equitably serving LGBT people in need.” info: naglrep.com. thetaskforce.org. williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu. sage.org. americanprogress.org. QUICK HITS —————————— “Love the Sinner” will have its world premiere during the Tribeca Film Festival with screenings from April 20-29. It is a personal documentary essay exploring the connection between Christianity and homophobia in the wake of the shooting at Pulse nightclub in Orlando. info: bit.ly/2mZyuXQ. International model Andreja Pejic has landed a double cover of GQ Portugal April issue, making history as the first transgender model to cover the men’s magazine. info: gqportugal.pt. “Many Voices: A Black Church Movement for Gay and Transgender Justice” collaborated with Morgan State University on April 4, to host Maryland’s first-ever screening of a film about black transgender activism at a historically black university in the state. info: manyvoices.org. A new study conducted by Harris Poll on behalf of GLAAD revealed that 20 percent of Millennials identify at LGBTQ individuals. info: glaad.org. An article has been published on Studio One’s troubled past at Hollywood LAist. info: laist.com. Matthew Christiansen has won an appeal that said that he could sue his employer for sexual harassment while on the job. info: slate.com. A former teen mother and author Audrey Lupisella has published “Impartial,” which teaches about an all-inclusive God. info: bookstore.westbowpress.com.
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++++++++ Sponsored Content ++++++++
from the Rx pad……
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Smile your way through stress; it might make you feel better! A new study determined whether smiling had a direct impact on cardiovascular stress recovery. Huyen Dang, Doctor of Pharmacy Candidate, South University School of Pharmacy It’s natural for people to smile when they are happy. However, has smiling ever made you happy during life stresses? Smiling is an external expression of positive feelings from within which appears to be linked to several stress level indicators such as heart rate and blood pressure. An interesting study conducted by the University of Kansas investigated whether manipulating facial expressions would impact positive responses to stress. The study suggested that smiling could actually reduce stress levels. It sounds ridiculous, right? How could smiling potentially have real health benefits? The study involved 170 participants who were instructed to hold chopsticks with their teeth, mimicking distinct holding patterns that would produce a neutral expression, a
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standard smile, or a genuine “Duchenne” smile. The varying types of facial expressions represented the three groups into which the participants were divided. In order to determine whether there were any benefits when cognitive awareness of facial expression was absent, the awareness of smiling was manipulated. In doing so, participants were given a cover story stating that the study was about “multitasking.” Participants completed a wide range of stress-induced tasks with chopsticks held in their mouth during the stressful period. To further increase their stress level, researchers gave them incorrect information about their performance. Stress levels were measured using the participants’ heart rate and blood pressure. Participants also provided selfreported stress levels and were strongly encouraged to be accurate about them. From the results, participants who were instructed to smile recovered from the stressful events showing lower heart rates than those who held neutral expressions. Those showing Duchenne smiles were the most relaxed of them all and had the most positive affect. In addition, participants with forced smiles held only by
the chopsticks reported more positive feelings than those who didn’t smile at all. In conclusion, researchers discovered that participants who spontaneously smiled during stress returned to resting levels of cardiovascular function more rapidly than the neutral-faced counterparts. This suggests that smiling may be helpful in speeding stress recovery by reducing negative effects of stress. It’s safe to say that the old aphorism “grin and bear it” does have meaning and that the benefits of smiling through stress should not be ignored. So, next time you’re feeling stressed out, try smiling through it, because it might make you feel better. Reference: Kraft, T., & Pressman, S. (2012). “Grin and Bear It: The Influence of Manipulated Facial Expression on the Stress Response.” Psychological Science, 23(11), 1372-1378. doi:10.1177/0956797612445312 Womenshealthmag.com,. (2015). Retrieved 29 July 2015, from http://www.womenshealthmag.com/files/ wh6_uploads/images/happiness-art.jpg
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life
Jesse’s Journal
Dr. George Weinberg Society and the Healthy Psychotherapist by Jesse Montegudo :: guest contributor
When “Society and the Healthy Homosexual,” Dr. George Weinberg’s most famous book, was published in 1972, the consensus was that lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people were mentally ill. A bestselling book from that period was “Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Sex (But Were Afraid to Ask)” by Dr. David Reuben, a quack who described gay men as sad, promiscuous types who cruised public toilets and trans women as “surgically mutilated male homosexuals.” Dr. Weinberg was one of the first non-LGBT mental health professionals (Dr. Evelyn Hooker was another) to defy conventional wisdom. Because of his work, and that of activists like Barbara Gittings, Franklin Kameny and Jack Nichols, the Board of Trustees of the American Psychiatric Association declared, on Dec. 15, 1973, that “by itself, homosexuality does not meet the criteria for being a psychiatric disorder.” Dr. Weinberg, who died of cancer on March 20 at age 87, was a true pioneer, and “Society and the Healthy Homosexual” was the most important book about LGBT people written by a heterosexual ally. (Dr. Alfred Kinsey was bisexual.) It was a must-read book for LGBT people coming out in the ‘70s; and Barbara Gittings included it in her “Gay Grab-Bag” list of essential titles. I myself named Dr. Weinberg’s book number six in my list of the most important LGBT books of the 20th Century (2000). To Dr. Weinberg, anti-LGBT bigotry was the true mental illness: “I would never consider a patient healthy unless he had overcome his prejudice against homosexuality.” In “Society and the Healthy Homosexual” Weinberg coined the word homophobia to describe “the dread of being in close quarters with homosexuals;” calls homophobia a disease; and notes that this is “an attitude held by many non-homosexuals and perhaps by the majority of homosexuals in countries where there is discrimination against homosexuals,” our own included. Though the concept of homophobia is Dr. Weinberg’s most famous contribution to queer thought, he is also one of the first to “propose a distinction between the words ‘homosexual’ and ‘gay.’ To be homosexual is to have an erotic preference for members of one’s own sex. … A homosexual person is gay when he regards himself as happily gifted with whatever capacity he has to see people as romantically beautiful. It is to be free of shame, guilt, regret over the fact that one is homosexual, that the searchlight of one’s childhood vision of human beings shined more brilliantly on members of one’s own sex than on those of the other. … To be gay is to view one’s sexuality as the healthy heterosexual views his.” This was written in 1972, so Dr. Weinberg may be forgiven for his use of sexist pronouns and the all-inclusive “gay” instead of LGBTQIIAA. The late, great gay rights pioneer, my good friend Jack Nichols, who was a healthy homosexual long before “Society and the Healthy
Homosexual” came along, called Dr. Weinberg (his good friend) a “gay-lib pioneer” and a true ally of our cause. Jack Drescher, clinical professor of psychiatry at New York Medical Center, told Lou Chibbaro, Jr. of the Washington Blade that Weinberg “was an early straight ally to the LGBT community who is responsible for introducing the concept of ‘homophobia’ into everyday language and thought. His was no small accomplishment, as the concept shifted society’s focus away from an automatic hatred or disdain for gay people and instead asked what’s wrong with people who feel that way. Instead of gay people having to explain themselves, the haters did — or as is often the case, they had to publicly and falsely deny they were haters.” Though “Society and the Healthy Homosexual” is no longer in print, you may find copies in public or LGBT libraries or through used book web sites. Even 45 years later, this is a book worth reading. : :
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tell trinity
“close,” stop, take a moment and start practicing mutual eruptions. It’s that simple…sort of.
by Trinity :: qnotes contributor :: trinity@telltrinity.com
Dearest Trinity, After three years with my husbear it happened: our sex life has hibernated. Is it inevitable, or is there some trick to stop this? Unsatisfied Bear, Boulder, CO
Does selfishness ever go away? Hi Trinity, It’s been five years, and I love my boyfriend. However, as time goes on he gets more selfish and less eager to compromise. I’m beginning to feel like a doormat. Help! My Way, Grand Rapids, MI Hi My Way, In today’s “me” generation, selfish boyfriends are as common as organic coconut milk, fare trade mocha lattes! Plus, if he’s the youngest child, was spoiled and/or is a Scorpio, then you may be in triple-selfish trouble. First, try getting him (with you) to volunteer at a hospital or gay youth center to open his mind to the needs of others. Second, try having “Selfless Days” at home so he can practice doing just for you and vise versa. Lastly, pumpkin, see if there are any books written about selfish people. If there aren’t…write one! Good luck! Dear Trinity, My last date went ballistic about my driving “too crazy.” Isn’t that ridiculous? Why should I change the way I drive when someone else is in my car? It’s my car. Driving Date-saster, LA, CA Dear Driving Date-saster, When you’re on a date, you are on a date, not
on some Ironman Steroid Competition Racing Show. Sorry, but you’re wrong to strap someone into a car seat and then show them who’s in control of their life’s destiny. Driving with someone is totally different than driving alone, period. Honey, be respectful towards your passenger’s comfort level at least until the second martini! (Did anyone say white-knuckled passengers? It’s really so much more kind not to scare the beegeebees out of someone when you are behind the wheel, whether on a date or not! My cartoon lends some counsel on that.) Hello Trinity, My lover and I are very happy, but when it comes to orgasms it’s always him or me. Even though I’m a biologist, it’s hard to time our orgasms, which makes mutual satisfaction an issue. Help? Timing’s Everything, Miami, FL Hello Timing’s Everything, Granted, uncontrolled orgasms happen. However, after a certain amount of time couples should have some idea of how each volcano acts before erupting, especially if you’re a scientist. Each of you probably makes certain sounds, display body languages and/or yell certain verbal cues. “Oh God” is a common one. Listen, bubbles, when one of you gets
a&e
Dearest Unsatisfied, Sex with the same person is like eating at the same restaurant — it can become monotonous after a while. Sweetie, that’s why restaurants change their menus every year, just like you must do. So start reading: Trinity’s Hot Tips For Keeping Sex and Desire Between You And Your Hubby 1. Try having sex in different rooms or places other than the bedroom. Lots can happen in the kitchen or shower. 2. Try different ways of doing the same thing, especially trying different sexual positions and/or being more aggressive. 3. Try different aphrodisiacs, such as scented oils, wine or herbs, before lying down for sex. 4. Try different times of the day. Wake up early, go to bed early or try doing it in the afternoon. 5. T ry clearing your mind during sex while focusing on naughty thoughts with your partner. 6. T ry using all five senses differently, i.e. smelling and tasting new areas.
7. Try talking dirty to each other on the phone or Internet before getting together that night. Also try talking dirty during sex (no laughing). 8. Try spraying nice scents into the air conditioner, on the bed and on your privates. It always works for me! 9. Try stimulating different erogeneous zones such as behind the knees and elbows, in the armpits or lower back and around the neck and feet. 10. L astly, try not breaking up “again” just because the sex got boring “again.” Life is what you make it, so make your sex life fun! info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.
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EVENTS April 2017 LGBTQ Older Adults SEP APR MO Workshop Double Tree by Hilton Asheville Biltmore 115 Hendersonville Rd., Asheville 11:30 a.m.-1:15 p.m. A “lunch and learn” event for LGBTQ people and allies of all ages will be held as part of the Southern Gerontological Society’s 38th annual meeting, “New Horizons in Aging: Advances in Research & Practice,” taking place April 6-8. The workshop on LGBTQ seniors is open to the public. Experts in the field will discuss the unique issues faced by older LGBTQ individuals, with an intersectional perspective. More information and registration for the event are available online. southerngerontologicalsociety.org.
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8th Annual AIDS Walk & SEP APR MO High Heel Dash First United Methodist Church 311 3rd Ave. NE., Hickory 9 a.m. AIDS Leadership Foothills-Area Alliance (ALFA) hosts its annual AIDS Walk & High Heel Dash event. The two-mile walk will end with a community celebration and High Heel Dash at Taft Broome Park, 115 7th Ave. SW. Registration for the walk is $25, while the dash is free to participants. Lunch will be provided by John Boy and will be available for a small fee. All funds raised benefit ALFA’s HIV/AIDS prevention, detection and medical case management work in the local community. Register, and receive more information, online. alfainfo.org.
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Submit your event to our calendar!
You can submit your event to our comprehensive community calendar presented by qnotes, the Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce and Visit Gay Charlotte. Submit your event at goqnotes.com/eventsubmit/ and get a three-for-one entry. All Charlotte-area events will appear on each of the three calendars at qnotes (goqnotes.com), Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce (clgbtcc.org) and Visit Gay Charlotte (visitgaycharlotte.com).
2017 Crape Myrtle Festival SEP APR MO Host Party Home of Lance and Maria Phillips 522 N. Person St., Raleigh 7 p.m. The Board and Court of Crape Myrtle Festival holds their annual host party, an event to raise funds for the organization. Last year, the festival contributed $60,000 to local AIDS-related organizations and LGBTQ causes. Those interested in attending can RSVP online or by mailing in a donor/sponsorship form to Crape Myrtle Festival, Inc., P.O. Box 12201, Raleigh, NC 27605 or bring contributions to the party. Host donor package information is also available online. crapemyrtlefest.org.
Continues through April 16 SEP APR MO ‘Hedwig and the Angry Inch’ Knight Theater at Levine Center for the Arts 430 S. Tryon St., Charlotte Times vary The hit musical “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” comes to Charlotte, telling the tale of a unique character finding a way through the world in an inspiring way. The play has been called “thrilling” by The Wall Street Journal and “The greatest musical of the last 25 years” by Playbill. Tickets begin at $25. Tickets and more information are available online. blumenthalarts.org.
Alliance for Full Acceptance Oyster Roast Bowens Island 1870 Bowens Island Rd., Charleston 4 p.m. Alliance for Full Acceptance, the South Carolina-based group that works to bring acceptance and equality to LGBTQ people, is hosting an oyster roast. Participants can enjoy oysters, chili, hot dogs, beer, wine and soft drinks. Tickets are $25/ adults advance, $30/ adults at the door and $15/youth under 21. More information and tickets are available online. affa-sc.org.
7th Annual Radical Seder Elsewhere 606 S. Elm St., Greensboro 6 p.m. A radical Seder event will take place at Elsewhere, to connect Jewish liberation with historic and contemporary liberation texts, in a Passover story told over three floors of the museum. Traditional Seder foods will be served. Cost is $15 and tickets can be purchased at squ.re/2nqw0RA. Questions and dietary concerns can be directed to museum@goelsewhere.org. goelsewhere.org.
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Charlotte Roller Derby Double Header Grady Cole Center 310 N. Kings Dr., Charlotte 4:30-9 p.m.
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A double header of hard hitting roller derby action with the Charlotte Roller Girls All-Stars. The home team will take on the Hard Knox All-Stars, from Knoxville, Tenn., followed by the CLTRG B-Dazzlers taking on the Hard Knox B Team. Tickets are $12 in advance, $16 at the door. Kids’ tickets are $7 in advance and $9 at the door. Tickets are available online. charlotterollergirls.com. Continues through April 21 Charlotte Jazz Festival: Happy Hour Jazz Levine Center for the Arts 550 S. Tryon St., Charlotte The Blumenthal Performing Arts Center presents a free jazz event, taking place over two days, with Bassist Reggie Sullivan (a quartet) and Al Strong Quartet on Thursday, and A Sign of the Times and Duda Lucena Quartet on Friday. More information is available online. blumenthalarts.org.
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LGBTQA Cross-Company SEP APR MO Mixer Heist Brewery 2909 N. Davidson St., Charlotte 5-8 p.m. Queen City Connects hosts a crosscompany mixer for LGBTQIA people and allies, offering a chance to mingle, network and make new friends. More information is available online. facebook.com/pg/QueenCityConnects.
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Continues through April 28 SEP APR MO Dining Out for Life to Raise HIV/AIDS Funds Asheville, NC, Charleston, SC & Columbia, SC Dining Out for Life, a national initiative that works to support organizations that raise funds for HIV/AIDS work, takes place across the Carolinas. In Asheville, Western North Carolina AIDS Project will hold their fundraiser on April 27, with over 100 restaurants participating. Also on April 27, Charleston will hold their event at participating restaurants, with funds going to benefit the Ryan White Wellness Center at Roper St. Francis Healthcare. On April 28, the event in Columbia will take place, with proceeds going to benefit the SC HIV/ AIDS Council. More information is available online. diningoutforlife.com.
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dishing with buff faye by Buff Faye :: qnotes contributor :: info@bufffaye.com
You better WERK?! Take the RuPaul’s ‘Drag Race’ DQ Quiz “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 9 just started back up this past month. It’s on a Friday and on VH1. I’m still adjusting to that frankly. But I have to say all the Season 9 girls and the surprise return of a queen is making it “must-watch” TV. For those Drag Race junkies, I decided
to do another one of my Drag Queen (DQ) Quizzes, just for you. Let’s see how high your DQ is on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” trivia! Start your engines…take out your pen and don’t cheat by looking at the bottom of the column for the answers. Ready. Set. Go!
‘RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 9 contestants.
Photo Credit: courtesy of VH1 and ‘RuPauls Drag Race’
1. Who went home on the first episode of Season 9 of “RuPaul’s Drag Race?” A. Cynthia Lee Fontaine D. Nobody B. Jaymes Mansfield E. Kimora Blac C. Charlie Hides
7. W ho was quoted saying on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 8: “I’m here to destroy everyone.” A. Thorgy Thor C. Acid Betty B. Kim Chi D. Laila McQueen
2. What “RuPaul’s Drag Race” queen from Season 9 performed in the Queen City on New Year’s Eve prior to being on the show? A. Alexis Michelle D. Derrick Barry B. Cynthia Lee Fontaine E. Both C & D C. Eureka O’Hara
8. What is the oldest age of a drag queen to be a contestant on “RuPaul’s Drag Race?” A. 42 D. 52 B. 48 E. 53 C. 56
3. What was the name of the “Project Runway” contestant who was a regular judge on the early seasons of “RuPaul’s Drag Race?” A. Carson Kressley D. Todrick B. Ross Matthews E. Tim Gunn C. Santino Rice 4. What Season 5 “RuPaul’s Drag Race” queen competed in the National Entertainer of Year, FI pageant in Louisville, KY? A. Coco Montrese D. Alaska Thunderfuck B. Alyssa Edwards E. Detox C. Jinx Monsoon 5. What judge on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” appeared on Broadway in the lead role of the award-winning musical “Kinky Boots?” D. RuPaul Andre A. Santino Rice Charles B. Michelle Visage E. Todrick C. Lady Bunny 6. Who is the first “RuPaul’s Drag Race” contestant to enter the competition as an openly transgender woman? D. Monica Beverly Hillz A. Miss Peppermint E. Sonique B. Jiggly Caliente C. Naysha Lopez
9. W hat song did Lady Gaga grow up listening to that she said inspired her when she appeared in the workroom with RuPaul for Season 9? A. “Supermodel” D. “Glamazon” B. “Cover Girl” E. “Back to my Roots” C. “A Shade Shady” 10. W ho is going to win “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 9? A. Eureka O’Hara D. Miss Peppermint B. Alexis Michelle E. Aja C. Trinity Taylor DRAG TIP: Find the answers to the “RuPaul’s Drag Race” DQ Quiz at the end of this column. How many did you get right? — Buff Faye calls the Queen City home and hopes to wake up and find the Trump presidency was just a horrible nightmare (plus she loves to raise money for charities). Find her at your favorite bars and hot spots. Plus don’t forget her monthly Saturday night shows, Sunday drag brunch and regular Friday night party bus. Learn more at AllBuff.com. Follow on Twitter @BuffFaye
SHOUT OUTS: Cuckoo Alert! Cynthia Lee Fontaine, the surprise contestant returning to be on Season 9, will be coming to the Bar at 316 on Thursday, April 20! Don’t miss this special show! Answers: 1. D / 2. C / 3. C / 4. B / 5. E / 6. A / 7. B / 8. D / 9. A / 10. ?
April 7-20 . 2017
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April 7-20 . 2017