QNotes, June 1, 2018

June 1-14 . 2018

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June 1-14 . 2018

inside

Will a plus-size girl finally win RPDG? page 15

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news & features

Black LGBTQ group calls for resignation N.C. town mayor, arts.of entertainment. news. views. police officer after violent arrest May 25 - goqnotes.com/60046/

arts. entertainment. news. views.

4 News Notes: Regional Briefs 6 News Notes: U.S./World Briefs 7 Remembering Pearl Berlin

Study: LGBTQ teens feel unsafe at school, hear negative comments from family May 21 - goqnotes.com/60017/

a&e / life&style 8 9 11 12 15 16 17 18

Pride & Protest Pride stages across the country Carolinas Pride events Billy Ensley: An institution Dishing with Buff Faye Tell Trinity Out in Print Q Events Calendar

opinions & views 14 Spiritual Reflections

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online

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It’s time!

more news & features …

Mayfield under fire again for social media post suggesting cops terrorize minorities May 17 - goqnotes.com/59905/ Southern Moravians approve marriage for gay clergy, members May 15 - goqnotes.com/59892/ Spiritual Reflections

Out in Print

with St. John’s Baptist’s Dr. Dennis Foust page 14

Martin Duberman recounts painful era page 17

RAIN AIDS Walk raises hopes, funds for ASO organization May 14 - goqnotes.com/59882/

June 1-14 . 2018

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qnotes connect June 1-14, 2018 Vol 33 No 03

arts. entertainment. news. views. goqnotes.com twitter.com/qnotescarolinas facebook.com/qnotescarolinas

contributors this issue

Buff Faye, Matt Comer, Torie Dominguez, Rev. Dennis W. Foust, Lainey Millen, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Lawrence Toppman, Trinity

front page

Graphic Design by Matt Comer Photography: RanaDuzyol via Adobe Stock Mission:

The focus of QNotes is to serve the LGBTQ and straight ally communities of the Charlotte region, North Carolina and beyond, by featuring arts, entertainment, news and views content in print and online that directly enlightens, informs and engages the readers about LGBTQ life and social justice issues.

Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc., dba QNotes P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222 ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Sales: x201 adsales@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, ph 212.242.6863 Managing Editor: Jim Yarbrough, x201, editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Editor: Lainey Millen, specialassignments@goqnotes.com Social Media Manager: Matt Comer, matt@goqnotes.com Copy Editor: Torie Dominguez, torie@goqnotes.com Staff Writer: Matt Comer, matt@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x205, production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.

Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2018 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorial notations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return. Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

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upcoming issues:

06.15.18: Homelessness & Poverty in the LGBTQ Community Advertising Space Deadline: June 6 06.29.18 Queer Arts in the QC Advertising Space Deadline: June 20

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news notes: carolinas compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

Charlotte Chamber expo slated

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce will hold its Pride in Business Expo, “We Mean Business,” on June 26, 2-7 p.m., at the Embassy Suites, 401 E. Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd.

The 2018 Best of Show award will be presented during the expo to the organization with the highest cumulative score based on innovation, originality, content, substance and presentation. Chamber members will serve as judges. All exhibitors are automatically entered.

The winner will receive a half-priced booth and gift basket.

Admission is free and open to the public.

Booths for members are $75 and for-profit $125. Login to the member portal to view special pricing options. Those for non-members are $125/non-profit and $175/for-profit and are available for purchase online at bit.ly/2GWGw8S. Deadline is June 1 for reservations via events@ clgbtcc.org with business name and whether or not companies will participate in the raffle. Full details are available online.

Sponsorships are available at four levels: presenting, $7,500; rainbow, $2,500; swag bag, $1,250 (with logo and information printed on the bag and placement of items in it at no charge); and break-out sessions, $1,000. Details are available online. info: clgbtcc.org.

Author speaks at library

HARRISBURG, N.C. — Lesbian author Paula Martinac will speak about her novel, “The Ada Decades,” at the Harrisburg Public Library, 201 Sims Pkwy., on June 18 at 4 p.m.

The book recants the lives of two southern women — Ada Shook, a librarian, and Cam Lively, a teacher — who fall in love in the 1950s. The book is initially set during the period when school integration comes to Charlotte, N.C. The book continues its narrative over seven decades with 11 interconnected stories where Ada witnesses racism, religious conflict and gay survival networks.

Martinac was the 1990 Lambda Literary Award winner in Fiction. She has published three nonfiction books on lesbian and gay culture and politics as well as numerous articles, essays, and short stories. Also a playwright, her works have had productions with Pittsburgh Playwrights Theater Company, Manhattan Theatre Source, the Pittsburgh New Works Festival, No Name Players, and others. Martinac teaches creative writing to undergraduates at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte and is a writing coach with the Authors Lab of the Charlotte Center for the Literary Arts. She is originally from Pittsburg, Pa. She and her wife Katie Hogan live in Charlotte. info: cabarruscounty.us/location/libraryharrisburg-branch. paulamartinac.com.

Carolina Voices slates season finale

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Carolina Voices’ 18-member ensemble Impromptu will present its “Creative A Cappella” season finale concert

Louganis to keynote gala MYRTLE BEACH, S.C. — The Grand Strand Pride Business Expo and Gala will be held on Aug. 25 at the Marina Inn at Grand Dunes, 8121 Amalfi Pl. Held between 3-6 p.m., the annual event features an Expo showcasing members of the Coastal Business Guild. It is free and open to the public. Directly afterward, a gala beginning at 6 p.m. will feature as its keynote speaker, four-time Olympic medalist Greg Louganis who is being brought in through the VIP presenting sponsorship of Careteam+.

Considered one of the greatest American divers, Louganis now spends his time as a gay rights activist, as well as an HIV awareness advocate. The gala includes dinner, dancing and entertainment. Advanced tickets are required for the gala and are available for purchase online. A cash bar will be open for both events.

In 1988 Louganis tested positive for HIV. Coming out as a gay athlete in a time when Olympic gold medalist Greg Louganis it simply was not done, his 1995 inspirational autobiography spent five weeks at number one on the New York Times bestseller list.

Tickets for the gala are $60 and are available online.

Sponsorships are currently being sought. For those who participate, a one-year membership in the Guild is included. The deadline is July 13 for inclusion in the printed program.

The Marina Inn will serve as the host hotel. Rooms start at $199 per night plus fees and taxes. Call 843-913-1333 and ask for the Grand Strand Pride group rate. The rate ends on July 26 or sooner if the hotel sells out. info: grandstrandpride.com/pride.html. on June 23, 3 p.m. and 8 p.m., at Duke Energy Theatre at Spirit Square, 345 N. College St. The ensemble will present out-of-theordinary songs and fresh, new takes on popular songs in an all a cappella format. “Creative A Cappella” will feature “Fast Car” (heartbreaking arrangement of Tracy Chapman’s song); “Home” (an intimate take on this Phillip Phillips anthem); and “Honeybee” (a whimsical, imaginative new song) by Steam Powered Giraffe, among others.

“This program has been so much fun to put together,” said director John Quillin.

“We’ve selected songs that will enthrall the audience, and leave them with a sense of awe at what the human voice can do.

“We use no instruments, but we do have an amazing beat boxer.

If you’ve never heard what a real vocal percussionist can do, you’re in for a jaw-dropping experience,” Quillin continued.

Tickets are $20/regular, $18/senior and $15/student and are available online at bit. ly/2GUGFtG. info: carolinavoices.org.

Band passes baton

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — The Charlotte Pride Band has a new artistic director, Dr. John Ross, and an assistant director, Cameron Elliott. The baton was passed to Ross by M. David Wallace in May. A potluck was held to honor Wallace on May 20, the culmination of a week’s worth of celebration of music and more.

Wallace served the band since 2012. info: charlotteprideband.org.

Triad Museum nets arts funding

GREENSBORO, N.C. — Elsewhere Museum, 606 S. Elm St., has been awarded with $35,000 in funds for Art + HealthCare Residencies from the National Endowment for the Arts.

Four national artists will be invited for two-week, funded research residencies embedded at the Union Square Nursing Campus, 124 E. Gate City Blvd., a state-of-the-art clinical and simulation training facility utilized by the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, North Carolina A&T State University, Guilford Technical Community College and Cone Health Systems, the museum said. It added that artists at the intersection of art, science and human care will engage with students, faculty and healthcare providers to deepen research into health technologies and clinical training. Artists will receive studios at the campus, observe simulations and take part in Elsewhere’s residency community. Following the residency, each will propose site-specific, public art projects for a new-work commission.

“Artists working in the healthcare field are bringing critical and experiential ideas into patient-centered care” said Elsewhere’s Executive Director George Scheer. “By situating and supporting artists in an advanced training facility, we hope to foster creative insight

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into the way care is taught and practiced at the campus and in our neighborhood.” info: goelsewhere.org. arts.gov.

Triangle Film features church members

Chorus Board President David Conroy said, “This has been a tremendous season overall, and ‘Journey to the Past’ is truly the icing on the cake.”

Tickets for concert are $10 as a suggested contribution and are available online. Shows will feature refreshments and a raffle drawing for prizes. info: tgmchorus.org.

ASO gets PrEP-ared

Rev. Annie Ross

DURHAM, N.C. — The premiere film screening of the documentary “Grief Journeys” will take place on June 16, 6 p.m., at Full Frame Theatre, 320 Blackwell St. A discussion and Q&A session will follow.

The film was produced by Rev. Annie Ross and edited by Saving Daisy Production. It features Imani Metropolitan Community Church members Toddie Stewart, Pricilla Ross and Deacon Marcus Davis. The piece explores transformative journeys through pain and grief.

The intimate stories shared give the viewer “renewed hope in the soul’s ability to soar after sorrow and a greater insight into the heart’s capacity to heal after loss.”

Tickets are $10.50 and are available online. info: facinggrief.org.

Chorus journeys to the past

RALEIGH/DURHAM/CHAPEL HILL, N.C. — The Triangle Gay Men’s Chorus will present their “Journey to the Past” spring concert on June 2, 7 p.m., at Fairmont United Methodist Church, 2501 Clark Ave., in Raleigh; June 3, 3 p.m., at Calvary United Methodist Church, 304 East Trinity Ave., in Durham; June 9, 7 p.m., at Binkley Baptist Church, 1712 Willow Dr., in Chapel Hill; and June 10, 3 p.m., at Pullen Memorial Baptist Church, 1801 Hillsborough St., in Raleigh.

“Journey to the Past” is a voyage through time and sound, featuring music from yesterday and today. Concertgoers will enjoy hits from groups like The Temptations, The Four Seasons, Kansas and Phillip Phillips. Tunes range from age-old folk songs to swing; rock ballads to country twang; and Broadway hits to millennial chart toppers.

“We’re covering the gamut this with this one,” says Jeff Whicker, co-artistic director for the chorus. “We want to give audiences a taste of everything, so everyone has something to really enjoy.”

DURHAM, N.C. — The Triangle Empowerment Project has invited the community to “Ignite Durham! ‘Are we PrEP-ared?’ on June 25, 10 a.m.-3p.m., at Conference Room A, second floor, Durham County Department of Public Health, 414 E. Main St. The event is a Partnership for Healthy Durham’s HIV/ STI committee strategic planning meeting where participants will discuss ways to improve access to PrEP for Durham residents.

To attend, register for the free event by June 15 online at bit.ly/2KYoGoq or send an RSVP to Danita King at dking@dconc.gov.

Lunch will be provided. info: healthydurham.org.

Expo sessions announced

RALEIGH, N.C. — The Triangle Expo for LGBTQ Aging Adults will be held on June 23, 11 a.m.-4 p.m., Five Points Center for Active Adults, 2000 Noble Rd. SAGE Raleigh and Resources for Seniors have released the topics for the expo’s 10 educational sessions. They are: Legal Issues, Roger Manus, Campbell University School of Law ; Advance Care Directives, Rich Gwathney, Transitions LifeCare; Financial Issues and Retirement Planning, Lorraine Johnson, Lifetime Asset Management, and Tom Cameron, Cameron Financial Services; Dialogue about LGBTQ Resilience, Margot Arrowsmith, Silver Linings for Seniors; Aging in Place, Audrey Galloway, AARP North Carolina; Healthy Living, Mandy Nester, Registered Nurse; Mental Health Issues, Margot Arrowsmith, Silver Linings for Seniors; Understanding Housing Options, Scott Waterhouse, Resources for Seniors; Understanding Medicare, Susan Maguire, Resources for Seniors; and HIV Pharmaceuticals, Patrick Lee, Gilead Sciences.

Nearly 40 exhibitors have taken all of the available booths as of press time. They cover the gamut of services and organizations which cater to seniors, in addition to others that are more general in nature.

Presenting sponsor for the event is American Airlines. Eleven other sponsors fall in

the gold and silver categories. info: lgbtcenterofraleigh.com/sage-expo.html.

Senior development nears capacity

DURHAM, N.C. — Village Hearth Cohousing has announced that 24 of its 28 homes have been spoken for and are seeking participants to fill the last four units.

The development caters to LGBTQ seniors, friends and allies who are over 55.

Units are cottage-style, one-story homes.

The Common House will be a hub of activity with mailboxes, exercise room, crafts room, guest suite and the shared kitchen/dining room available for gatherings.

The project was featured in an article in the Wall Street Journal about environmentallyconscious housing for older adults. It is also considered to be the first LGBTQ-focused senior cohousing in the U.S. “This trend will improve the lack of options for older LGBT as they choose to live in supportive communities where they know and trust their neighbors, and they can be themselves,” said Charles R. Durrett, principal aarchitect.

Groundbreaking is slated for fall 2018, with move-in projected for late 2019.

McCamant & Durrett Architects is the lead cohousing developer who is in charge of the project. It leads workshops across the U.S. on the cohousing effort. info: villagehearthcohousing.com.

news

myths, heroes and struggles of the gay rights movement throughout history and pop culture,” GoUpstate reported. It stars Proud Mary founder and artistic director Sandy Staggs and five other actors. Audiences will also be able to view the university playwright and professor Barry Whitfield’s “The Kiss,” a one-act play focused on male intimacy.

Tickets are $10/general and $5/student and are available at bit.ly/2L0UGsh. The theatre group will hold its Lavender Cabaret and Season Two Reveal on June 23, 7:30 p.m., at Aug Smith on Main, 174 E. Main St. The event will include music from gay-themed Broadway musicals, wine sipping, light hors d’oeuvres, silent auction and raffle prizes. Tickets are $15 and are available at bit.ly/2GVDC4c.

In early August, Proud Mary will present Del Shores’ “Southern Baptist Sissies” in Spartanburg from Aug. 2-5 and Greenville from Aug. 9-12. Tickets will go on sale soon and will be available for purchase online. info: proudmarytheatre.com.

Regional Justice initiative takes over capitol

South Carolina Gay theatre group formed

SPARTANBURG, S.C. — The Proud Mary Theatre Company has been formed and it is South Carolina’s first and only theatre group exclusively devoted to LGBTQ stories and voice, GoUpstate.com reported.

The award-winning troupe kicked off their inaugural season with “I Am My Own Wife” in the fall of 2017. It received awards at the Southeastern Theatre Conference, held in Mobile, Ala., for Best Production, Best Actor (Dave LaPage) and best Director (Robert Fuson). For an upstart company, that is a major accomplishment.

Earlier this year, Proud Mary’s “5 Lesbians Eating a Quiche” opened to box office raves.

And, its “Movement: A Gay Pride Fantasia” is currently onstage through June 3 at the University of South Carolina Upstate BlackBox Theater in the Humanities and Performing Arts Center, 800 University Way. The production pays homage to Havey Milk circuitously and is an “original devised theatre piece that re-imagines and re-examines the

RALEIGH, N.C. — The Fair Courts, Fair Votes Day of Action, sponsored by Democracy North Carolina, NAACP of North Carolina, North Carolina Voters for Clean Elections and Progress NC, will be held on June 5 beginning at 2 p.m. at the North Carolina General Assembly’s Bicentennial Mall, 1 E. Edenton St. Participants will be able to “hear about what these attacks on our democracy mean, and how we can take action to fight back. After our rally, we’ll turn that energy into action, heading inside the legislature to share with our lawmakers why we believe they should do their jobs and go home (and leave judges and voters alone!),” organizers said.

For those unable to attend, organizers will be hosting online and regional events across the state to continue to put pressure on lawmakers to protect courts and votes.

To sign up, visit bit.ly/2J8mUDT. info: democracync.org.

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news notes: u.s./world compiled by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

Segal contributes to Smithsonian archives WASHINGTON, D.C. — On May 17, the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History received a donation from Mark Segal —publisher, activist, journalist, civil rights pioneer and national LGBTQ leader— documenting his almost 50-year career in LGBTQ activism from Stonewall to today.

Included are personal papers — approximately 16 cubic feet of important and rare journals, flyers, posters, letters and materials that chronicle political developments that cover the 1970s to the present.

In addition to his papers, Segal donated artifacts from his personal collection, including the first state-issued Gay Pride Proclamation (1975), buttons and T-shirts. Segal also gave a donation can that he used during the 1970 Christopher Street Gay Liberation Day march and a flyer for the march, as well as his personal marshal’s badge.

“Few people have been as fearless, creative and relent-

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less in their activism for LGBTQ rights as Mark Segal,” said Katherine Ott, curator at the museum. “The materials he is donating are an insider’s guide to most of the big issues of the past 50 years.”

“We fought for pride, for equal rights, our place in the military and our right to marry the person we love,” Segal said.

“I am humbled and honored to know the National Museum of American History will preserve and tell our struggle for generations to come.”

In June 1969, a teenaged Segal travelled from his home in Philadelphia to New York City, and within weeks found himself in the middle of the Stonewall raid and uprising.

Following that experience, he devoted his life to activism and helped organize the first New York Pride March in 1970.

He helped found or participated in a number of emerging activist groups, including the Gay Activists Alliance, Gay Liberation Front, Action Group, Gay Youth and the Gay Raiders.

Segal realized the power of media, and to protest the lack of LGBTQ television Mark Segal via Facebook

coverage, he interrupted numerous live broadcasts, including leaping in front of Walter Cronkite on the “CBS Evening News” with a sign that said “Gays Protest CBS Prejudice.” Later, reports document that he and Cronkite became friends.

Segal is the founding publisher of the Philadelphia Gay News (1976) and that same year, he was elected president

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of the National Gay Media Association. In 2004, he was chosen to be president of the National Gay Newspaper Guild. He was appointed to the Comcast Cable and NBCUniversal Joint Diversity Board as a member at large in 2011. In 2013, he was inducted into the National Lesbian & Gay Journalist Association’s (NLGJA) Hall of Fame. His memoir “And Then I Danced: Traveling the Road to LGBT Equality” (2015) took top prize for “excellence in book writing” at the 2016 NLGJA awards. info: americanhistory.si.edu.

QUICK HITS —————————————————————————————— The LGBT Bar celebrated the passage out of committee of H7066, a bill that would ban the Gay/Trans “Panic” Defense in Rhode Island courtrooms. info: lgbtbar.org.

cused exclusively on LGBTQ inclusion in sports. info: vikings.com.

GLSEN has announced the winner of its 2018 Pride shirt contest. info: glsen.org.

Jennifer Aniston will play the first LGBTQ president of the U.S. in the upcoming Netflix release of “First Ladies,” Paper magazine reported. Playing opposite her is Tig Notaro as the first lady. info: bit.ly/2kwHxvA.

Guyhop is holding its first Spokesmodel Contest to represent the web-based app until July 1. info: guyhop.com/spokesmodel-contest.

Q Voice News reported that the Harvey Milk Park added new local LGBTQ activist names to the Memorial Wall. info: bit.ly/2GZBOHs.

The Canadian Centre for Gender & Sexual Diversity launched their plans to create to world’s first LGBTQI2+ Museum. info: ccgsd-ccdgs.org/newspace.

San Francisco, Calif. now has an official LGBTQ leather district. info: bit.ly/2sgAXh9.

The Minnesota Vikings will become the first NFL team to host a summit and fundraiser fo-

Disney has introduced rainbow Mickey Mouse ears for Pride. info: bit.ly/2L30vVY.

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life

In Memoriam

Pearl Berlin, champion of same-sex marriage and other causes, dead at 93 Berlin is survived by her wife of nearly 52 years

by Nancy McLaughlin :: The News & Record GREENSBORO, N.C. — Lennie Gerber met Pearl Berlin in 1964 over brunch with a mutual acquaintance while on her way to California to work on her doctorate.

A year went by and it was the next summer when Gerber saw a notice that the American Federation of Teachers would be meeting in Los Angeles.

“I said to myself: I wonder if that Pearl Berlin is coming?” Gerber said of the petite, brown-haired woman, who was then president of the Wayne State University chapter of the teacher’s union.

Her phone soon rang and Berlin — who Gerber recalled as smart as she was passionate for workers’ rights — was on the other end.

“How do you describe what makes you fall in love with somebody?” asked Gerber.

“She wowed me.”

Berlin, who grew up in Brooklyn, N.Y., and eventually settled in High Point, died last Thursday at the age of 93.

A public memorial will be held on June 14 at 3 p.m. in the Virginia Dare Room of the Alumni House on the campus of UNC-Greensboro.

The women’s love story became the national face of the same-sex marriage debate in this country back when it was illegal in most states. June 2 would have marked 52 years together and their fifth wedding anniversary.

Filmmakers learned about them after reading a story by former News & Record columnist Susan Ladd and shared their relationship in the documentary, “Living in the Overlap.”

“As I said to Lennie when I learned of Pearl’s passing, ‘How could someone so tiny leave such an enormous legacy on a community?’” said Addison Ore, an LGBTQ speaker and writer, and a friend of Berlin’s for over 20 years.

The athletic Berlin played field hockey at Brooklyn’s Erasmus Hall High School, which also claims Barbra Streisand as an alumna. She graduated from Sargent College (which later became a part of Boston University) with a degree in physical education and earned a master’s and doctorate at Penn State in sports psychology and research methods and statistics.

After teaching at Detroit’s Wayne State University and other schools in the north, she moved to North Carolina in 1971 to preside over the new doctorate program in the kinesiology department at UNCG. UNCG’s Pearl Berlin Writing Award, named in her honor, recognizes excellence in thesis and dissertation writing.

Pearl Berlin, right, with her wife Lennie Gerber.

Beyond workers’ rights, Berlin later served on local and state Democratic campaigns, most notably as a consultant to Harvey Gantt in his 1990 campaign against Jesse Helms for the U.S. Senate.

For most of Berlin’s adult life, Gerber was at her side.

The women, who often finished each other’s sentences, fell in love at a time when being gay was taboo to many people.

Gerber’s niece, Ronnie Grabon, was a teenager when Berlin became part of their family.

“They were always who they were,” Grabon said of the couple. “They never needed to hide in our family.”

By the time Grabon had children, the women were simply aunts in a loving relationship.

“I remember my daughter playing with Beanie Babies and sometimes there was a husband and wife and sometimes there were two wives,” Grabon said. “Pearl was always as much a part of our family as any husband would have been.”

Gerber and Berlin had a Jewish wedding ceremony in the sanctuary of Greensboro’s Beth David Synagogue under a chuppah, or canopy, made from the prayer shawls of both women’s relatives. While not a legal service in the eyes of the law, it sealed their commitment to each other.

Later they had a service in Maine, where same-sex marriage was legal, but it was not recognized in North Carolina until a federal judge overturned the ban here in 2014. Gerber and Berlin were instrumental in making that happen.

“I know that I — and so many others — always looked to Pearl and Lennie as the gold standard for what a loving and committed relationship could and should be,” Ore said. “They were both highly respected professionals who lived an outand-proud life for many years, and they helped us see the possibility of a long and happy union.”

The couple traveled the world — from Africa to Australia to the Antarctic.

Berlin’s health had declined dramatically in the last year.

“I think Pearl would be amused at the tsunami of tributes coming in for her,” Ore said. “She was not interested in accolades or acclaim. She was interested in doing what was right. She was a mensch in the truest sense of the word and I will always smile when I think of her.”

Gerber received condolences May 22 and 23 at Beth David Synagogue.

In lieu of flowers, contributions can be made to Equality North Carolina, the Human Rights Campaign, the North Carolina chapter of the American Civil Liberties Union or any charity. : : — This piece was originally published May 21, 2018, by The News & Record in Greensboro.

It is republished here with permission.

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LGBTQ Pride Month 2018

Pride and Protest In these locales around the world, Pride’s primary purpose remains a protest

by Matt Comer :: qnotes staff

W

hat started out in New York City’s Greenwhich Village on a warm summer night in June 1969 as a spontaneous eruption of righteous anger and protest has morphed through the ensuing decades into an annual celebration and commemoration for our global LGBTQ community. The Stonewall Rebellion was, no doubt, a protest — fueled by years of pent-up frustration, oppression and violence.

Today, that annual commemoration is known as Pride.

Festivals, parades, parties, educational workshops, picnics. It takes on various forms depending on the locale. Big cities in the West host parades and parties. Smaller towns host picnics.

But don’t be confused — in many places, Pride still is a protest. And for many locations, protest comes with party, a unique combination of celebration and community empowerment and advocacy for rights yet to be won.

It’s not just far-flung cities in hostile nations around the globe that can face challenge when trying to organize a Pride event.

Even here in the U.S., small towns in states like Mississippi have seen their permits revoked or denied. Just two decades ago, within living memory for most, conservative religious figures in Charlotte attempted to convince the city to deny a permit for a parade here, an effort taken up again by anti-LGBTQ protests in the mid-2000s.

Here are spotlights on some Pride events around the world where LGBTQ community members are forming their own celebrations, protests, parades and other events — including in some places that might surprise you and other locales where challenges are often more numerous than triumphs.

Pink Dot, Singapore This year, Singapore’s unique LGBTQ advocacy event, Pink Dot, celebrates 10 years. It all began a decade ago as a simple way to bring together LGBTQ people and their supporters in large numbers, to show the not-so-friendly, even hostile, city-state of Singapore. It is here, in this Asian island nation where same-sex relationships remain illegal and adoption by LGBTQ couples is also illegal. The law contains no anti-discrimination measures to protect LGBTQ people.

Pink Dot isn’t like most other Pride parades or festivals. It happens in a park and, in its early years, was devoid of the kind of pomp and revelry seen in big city Pride festivals or parades around the world. Masses of people come into the park wearing pink shirts and pink torchlights. When night falls, the black park turns into a sea of pink.

The annual event has certainly had its share of challenges, too. In 2016, the government sought to limit participation in the event, prohibiting tourists and non-residents from participating. The event was almost cancelled, as even the government

An aerial photo of Singapore’s Pink Dot. Photo Credit: Courtesy Pink Dot

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A scene from the Pride march in Mumbai.

Photo Credit: Courtesy QGraphy

prohibited foreign organizations or companies from supporting or sponsoring the event. Organizers were forced to barricade the park and review all participants’ passports or identification cards before letting them into the event.

Celebrating a decade this year, with the event slated for July 21, Pink Dot is expanding, creating a two-week line-up of community events prior to the big park event. Events will include parties, workshops and other educational events.

Starkville Pride The small town in Starkville, Miss., probably had little idea how much backlash they would face when denying a Pride march permit earlier this year. And, oh boy, did they face a backlash.

The small college town, home to Mississippi State University, eventually folded under intense national media pressure and a lawsuit threat and allowed two college students to proceed with their Pride march plans. The march was held on March 24 with thousands participating, including community members who traveled from across the nation to support the smalltown event.

Close to 3,000 people filled Starkville streets for the simple march, making the Pride event the largest parade the college town had ever seen.

Instead of big floats and fantasticallydecorated cars, the march contained families, baby strollers and simple marching contingents holding banners or flags.

Beirut Pride In 2017, Lebanon became the first nation in the Arab world to host a Pride event.

Like Singapore and a host of other nations around the globe, Lebanon has had a rocky relationship with LGBTQ equality in the modern age. The law in Lebanon techni-

cally still forbids same-sex relationships, though some recent court decisions have reduced the ways in which it can be used to target LGBTQ people.

Regardless, the nation’s social climate remains hostile to LGBTQ equality, making events like Pride both important and challenging.

A full week of events were planned for Pride in Beirut, the nation’s capital. But tremendous social pressure and the arrest of the event’s main organizer effectively shut down the event.

Organizer Hadi Damien was arrested after the kickoff to the event began in mid May, accused of encouraging debauchery and offending public decency.

Damien was released from police custody only after he signed a pledge to cancel the series of events that week.

What kind of events scared law enforcement and the government so much? A street party, poetry readings, a storytelling workshop, a legal panel, drag performances and a health workshop.

A government official later anonymously told The New York Times that complaints from religious organizations had resulted in the legal crackdown.

“Beirut Pride made a lot of people proud of Lebanon,” Damien told the New York newspaper. “And this cancellation made a lot of people sad and disappointed.”

Homosexuality remains illegal in nearly all Middle Eastern nations, with Israel an outlying exception. Simultaneously, however, some Arab and other Middle Eastern nations have begun to dramatically improve legal and medical protections for transgender people.

Pride in Ukraine The very first LGBTQ Pride event in the Eastern European nation of Ukraine didn’t occur until 2013. When it was presented in the nation’s capital of Kiev, it was met with hundreds of protesters and more than 20 LGBTQ activists rallying in solidarity with the Kiev community in Moscow were arrested by Russian authorities.

see Pride and Protest on 9

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life

LGBTQ Pride Month 2018

Headline acts blanket the nation A sampling of major Pride festivals’ entertainment line-up

by Torie Dominguez :: qnotes staff

A

cross the U.S. during the month of June, big cities stage their annual Pride festivals to honor the history and celebrate what it is to have Pride. Here are some of them below.

Washington D.C. June 7-10 Capital Pride Alliance’s Celebration 2018 culminates in its festival and three-stage concert on Pennsylvania Ave., headlined by pop superstar Alessia Cara and acclaimed club artist Troye Sivan, winner of two GLAAD Media Awards. capitalpride.org/ celebration-2018.

Pittsburgh June 8-9 Pride Rocks PGH is a two-night concert event and a new addition to this year’s Pittsburgh Pride, which takes place June 1-10. Headlining Friday’s opening installment are Troye Sivan Troye Sivan and German pop artist Kim Petras, who came under media scrutiny in her early teens when she spoke publicly about her gender transition. pittsburghpride.org/events.

Los Angeles June 9-10 The 2018 LA Pride Festival welcomes Kehlani as its Park Stage headliner on Saturday, with Tove Lo taking over the coveted spot for Sunday’s performance.

Other performers include rapper Eve; Swedish electropop duo Icona Pop; R&B singer-songwriter, actress, and philanthropist Keri Hilson; and Latin sensation Natalia Jiménez. lapride.org/event/2018-la-pride-festival.

Tove Lo

Milwaukee June 9-10 Pop queen JoJo, who burst onto the scene with her breakout single at just 13 years old, rules the mainstage, succeeded by inimitable new-wavers The B-52s the following night. pridefest.com/lineup.

Chicago June 16-17 R&B singer-songwriter Mya and groundbreaking rocker Belinda Carlisle join a lineup of more than 20 artists at Chicago Pride Fest 2018. northalsted.com/pridefest.

Kylie Minogue Atlanta June 22 Atlanta Pride presents rock legends Blondie in an exclusive, one-night performance ahead of the city’s annual Pride Festival in October. atlantapride.org.

Houston June 23-24 Grammy-winning country music legend LeAnn Rimes headlines Wonderland, Pride Houston’s 2018 LGBT Pride Celebration. pridehouston.org/celebration/entertainment.

Nashville June 23-24 Nashville Pride features four performance stages at its 2018 festival, with main stage artists including JoJo, Taylor Bennett (younger brother of Chance the Rapper), and Wilson Phillips. nashvillepride.org.

TLC New York June 23-24 PrideFest, the culmination of more than a week of Pride events, will be hosted by comedian Ross

Maxwell with headline performances by Australian songstress Kylie Minogue and actor and singer Alex Newell.

Newell stepped into the national spotlight with his role as Glee’s Unique Adams, followed by his Broadway debut in December 2017. nycpride.org/events.

San Diego July 14-15 Four-time Grammy winners and R&B legends TLC finally reunite at San Diego Pride on Sunday, joining the festival’s more than 100 performers across all genres of music and dance. sdpride.org.

Pride and Protest continued from page 8 Pride events in Ukraine have been few and far between, with many of them being banned. You’re more likely to see political rallies and protests, usually centered around each May’s International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia.

Last year, on May 17, LGBTQ activists holding an IDAHOTB rally in Kharkiv, Ukraine’s second-largest city, were violently attacked by a group of about 30 assailants. The activists were attacked and a rainbow flag was lit aflame. Luckily, four of the assailants were arrested and could be facing criminal charges.

Pride Uganda The African nation of Uganda has been a hotbed of LGBTQ activism and, in backlash, anti-LGBTQ hostility. In recent years, anti-LGBTQ religious activists in the nation and those from the U.S. have used the LGBTQ community as scapegoats and, even, called for violence against the community. Controversy was at its highest a few years ago, when harsh new laws were proposed, with some LGBTQ people being subject to life imprisonment or capital punishment.

Activists have faced these horrendous challenges head on, attempting to organize community groups and events, including Pride.

They’ve done so despite threats and actual incidents of violence. A leading LGBTQ Ugandan activist, David Kato, was murdered in 2011.

A legal crackdown on Ugandan Pride events occurred in 2015, and the nation hasn’t had a successful Pride event since.

In 2016, organizer Frank Mugisha and his fellow colleagues were arrested and detained and the event cancelled. Similarly, the 2017 event was cancelled after a government minister threatened event attendees with arrest and violence.

mosexuality have been slow to keep pace with other democracies around the world, like many other former colonies of the British empire.

Despite its massive size, India hosted only 18 Pride events in 2017, the largest of which attracting 12,000 people in Mumbai and the smallest only 80 people in Goa.

❝ Beirut Pride made a lot of people proud of Lebanon. And this cancellation made a lot of people sad and disappointed. ❞ — Beirut Pride organizer Hadi Damien on the cancelation of the Arab world’s only Pride events this year Organizers are trying again this year, with hopes to host a “Pride Uganda” event in Kampala later this year.

Pride in India “No two prides in India are the same, except all of them are organized as protest marches, given the archaic anti-sodomy laws from the British Raj [which] still stand [on] on the land.”

That’s how Indian activist Deepak Kashyap explained the culture and nature of Pride events in his native India in a write-up for InterPride, an international association of Pride organizers.

India is the world’s largest democracy, but its laws on ho-

Even for an international city like Mumbai, organizers faced tremendous difficulty in planning the event. Organizers received final permission from law enforcement to host the event just two days prior to the march.

“It is a long and tedious process,” Kashyap wrote of the permitting process, “with all imaginable degrading questions and queries waiting to greet you in most offices, year after year.”

That long process includes getting permits and permissions from a variety of offices, including city officials, each police station in areas where the march would pass through and even traffic officials. : :

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life

LGBTQ Pride Month 2018

Carolinas overflow with Pride Festival resource list spans two states, from mountains to sea

by Lainey Millen :: qnotes staff

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t’s that time of the year when the LGBTQ community sets out to celebrate Pride Month. Since its early days, when Pride was observed only in June around the anniversary of the Stonewall Riots which occurred on June 28, 1969 in New York City, it has now crossed over the boundary and is celebrated throughout the summer and fall months, with more events scattered throughout the remainder of the year.

To keep the tradition going, here is a list of the celebrations taking place all over the Carolinas.

Some last one day and others span a week with other pre- and post-events happening in tandem with the main event.

North Carolina Fayetteville Pride June 22 Fayetteville facebook.com/pg/fayncpride.

Salisbury Pride June 23 Salisbury salisburypride.com.

Charlotte Black Gay Pride July 25-29 Charlotte charlotteblackgaypride.org.

Charlotte Pride Festival & Parade Aug. 18-19 Charlotte charlottepride.org.

Pridepalooza Sept. 1 Hickory facebook.com/pridepalooza. bit.ly/2IP0tQM. Gaston Pride September 15 Gastonia facebook.com/pg/gastonpride.

Greensboro Pride Sept. 15 Greensboro greensboropride.org.

Catawba Valley Pride Sept. 15 Hickory catawbavalleypride.org.

OBX PrideFest Sept. 21-23 Manteo obxpridefest.com.

Blue Ridge Pride Sept. 29 Asheville blueridgepride.org.

Burke Pride September Morganton facebook.com/lgbtburke.

Port City Pride September Wilmington facebook.com/pg/ portcityprideblockparty.

Triangle Pride Parade and Festival (formerly NC Pride) Sept. 29 Durham/Raleigh/Carborro/ Chapel Hill trianglepride.com.

Alamance Pride Oct. 6 Burlington alamancepride.org.

Pride Winston-Salem Oct. 13 Winston-Salem pridews.org/wp.

Out! Raleigh 2019 Raleigh outraleigh.org.

South Carolina Outfest Columbia June 2 Columbia scpride.org/outfest.

What Happens on the Beach, Stays on the Beach June 14-17 Myrtle Beach bit.ly/onmyrtlebeach.

South Carolina Black Pride Aug. 24-26 Columbia southcarolinablackpride.com.

Grand Strand Pride Expo & Gala Aug. 25 Myrtle Beach grandstrandpride.com.

Charleston Pride Sept. 22 Charleston charlestonpride.org.

Famously Hot SC Pride Oct. 20 Columbia scpride.org/festival.

Upstate Pride SC Nov. 3 Spartanburg upstatepridesc.org.

NC/SC Flags Photo Credit: luzitanija via Adobe Stock

This list may not be fully comprehensive and qnotes welcomes input so that the list provides accurate information and current resources to maintain its integrity. Email editor@goqnotes.com to make changes or additions.

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THEATER

A Charlotte (theater) institution Billy Ensley as actor, director, collaborative pro

by Lawrence Toppman :: The Charlotte Observer

Billy Ensley demonstrates an emotion he’s looking for during rehearsal at Theatre Charlotte.

Photo Credit: Khadejah Nikouyeh (Charlotte Observer)

B

illy Ensley never met a man he didn’t like.

Then he didn’t like anybody, except one guy who rejected him after a botched sexchange operation.

At one point, the police suspected him of committing child murders but could never be sure of his guilt.

Now he’s presiding over a German community rocked by suicide, thwarted love, abortion and suppressed homosexual longings.

Billy Vinson Ensley has put together the longest-lasting, most diverse career of any actor-director currently working in Charlotte theater. Whether playing the amiable title character in “The Will Rogers Follies,” an embittered rocker in “Hedwig and the Angry Inch” or a possibly homicidal writer in “The Pillowman,” he has moved gracefully across the spectrum of musicals, dramas and comedies since the early 1980s.

He has spent most of the last decade directing: His version of the Tony-winning musical “Spring Awakening” closes Theatre Charlotte’s season May 25-June 10.

And he’s done all this without having to leave his hometown. That’s the most remarkable thing.

Local performers know virtually nobody earns a full-time living here as an actor. If you’re good, you’ll leave. If you don’t leave, how good could you be?

People started asking Ensley about departure plans in the 1980s, but he had a sound explanation for his refusal to bolt to New York.

“I thought, ‘There are 2,000 of me up there and only a handful of me here,’” he recalls. “So many of my contemporaries went to New York and became bartenders or word processors. I didn’t want to live out of a suitcase. I wanted to have a home and a dog and some roots.”

At 56, he does. He ended up as COO of Rexus Corporation, which does background checks internationally on prospective employees. He keeps a sailboat on Lake Norman and

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a house at the North Carolina coast. He has a 9-year-old Boston terrier named Maynard (for TV’s first beatnik, Maynard G. Krebs of “The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis”).

And on the side, he keeps reinventing himself and helping others do the same.

Directing ... since 3rd grade “I have been the third tree on the right, the supporting character and the lead, so I understand all levels of acting,” he says. “I’ve absorbed something from all the directors I’ve worked with: administrative styles, the balancing act of being a boss and a friend, ways to show the arc of a story.

“Managing people in the workforce, keeping them satisfied while meeting deadlines – these business skills come in handy as a director.”

Tom Hollis, who first directed him at Central Piedmont Community College about 35 years ago, knows why Ensley’s in demand: “He understands actors’ fears and anxieties and communicates with them on that level. He never had to be the star. He took the (smallish) role of the company manager in our ‘Annie Get Your Gun’ and gave that as much care and attention as Hedwig.

“He’s always willing to help. He learned to work with a rope years ago for ‘The Will Rogers Follies.’ We’re opening this Summer Theatre season with ‘Oklahoma!’ and the actor playing Will Parker needed to know how to do rope tricks. Billy was right in the middle of directing ‘Spring Awakening’ but came over to teach him.”

You might say Ensley’s been directing since third grade, when the present of a ventriloquist’s dummy inspired him to create an act he took to churches, business conferences, even weddings. (He can’t recall why he started but remembers watching old clips of Edgar Bergen

see Ensley on 19

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What’s All the Hype About Endometriosis

By Edana Holliday, PharmD For centuries women have faced health issues that are not always These risk factors are common for many women, and over time can understood. One of them is endometriosis. This article will shed some drastically increase the risk of severe cases of endometriosis. light on what the disease is and how it may affect the women in your At this point, you may be wondering how a female would know life. Endometriosis is a disease that affects the reproductive organs if they were at risk or had developed endometriosis, and what are of women and often goes undiagnosed. Women that are affected by the next steps if there is a diagnosis. Common symptoms include the disease (both diagnosed and undiagnosed) painful menstruation, heavy menstrual bleeding, often have interruptions in their daily lives as a painful intercourse, infertility, chronic pelvic or result of the sometimes-debilitating symptoms. abdominal pain without menses, and fatigue. If these Often these complications can impact the ability symptoms seem familiar to you or to someone you to thrive in school, careers, finances, personal love, it may be time to consult your medical provider relationships, and social relationships. Unlike about the symptoms. Many times, women will not other disorders related to women’s health, bring up concerns because they have accepted that endometriosis is not biased in those that are those symptoms are “normal” for them. However, affected. The disorder can affect women of the symptoms above are linked to health concerns all sizes, races, and socioeconomic statuses. that could impact the lifestyle of women as they age.

The goal of this article is to shed light on the Conversations with a medical provider may lead to disease, as well as provide information to those an MRI or CT scan to look at the uterus or a simple who feel they know someone suffering with abdominal or pelvic exam., undiagnosed symptoms.

Women living with endometriosis have limited Approximately 176 million women treatment options, but as the disorder gains more in the world are currently affected by respect, additional research has begun to identify Illustration Credit: timonina via Adobe Stock endometriosis, with almost 10% still better opportunities for treatment advancement. undiagnosed.1 The majority of the women impacted by endometriosis All patients are encouraged to make lifestyle changes regardless face the peak of their complications during reproductive ages of 25of the severity of symptoms. Some simple tasks that can alleviate 35, as the disorder can cause infertility or difficulty in conceiving. symptoms include: consuming more vegetables and decreasing Endometriosis primarily involves the uterus which is commonly meals with higher fat content, bathing in warm water, and using overgrown with cells that cover the organ. Common risk factors can heating pads, and even having acupuncture has proven to relieve include family history, low body weight, increase in age, excessive complications. For patients with more severe symptoms where use of alcohol, early start of menses, and intercourse during menses.2 medication is required, there are a number of options to improve the

quality of life of the patient. These include pain medications (NSAIDS — ibuprofen, naproxen), Mirena, and birth control tablets. The last two options can stabilize any hormone imbalances and alleviate the severity of symptoms. Those who take the next step and talk to their medical provider often feel more empowered when they understand the options to improve their quality of life.

Think about the women who may suffer in your life and how obtaining knowledge about this disorder could very well change their world.

Knowledge is power and the more you know about your body, the more you can help others. Women are more prone to take care of those around them and focus on their own health last. Take a pledge to pay attention to your own body or to the bodies of those you love.

When you feel as though they need help, encourage them to find assistance. Remember to reach out to the health care team in your area for resources.

References 1. “What is endometriosis? Causes, Symptoms, and Treatments,” Endometriosis Foundation of America.

Available at: https://www.endofound.org/endometriosis 2. Ashrafi, M., Sadatmahalleh, S., akhoond, M., and Talebi, M. Evulation of Risk Factors Associated with Endometriosis in Infertile Women. International Journal of Fertility and Sterility. 2016; 10(1): 11-21.

3. Armstrong, Carrie. ACOG Updates Guideline on Diagnosis and Treatment of Endometriosis. Am Fam Physician.

2011 Jan 1;83(1):84-85.

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spiritual reflections

Photo Credit: rolffimages via Adobe Stock

by Rev. Dennis W. Foust, PhD :: guest contributor

She was smiling

O

ne of the most meaningful moments of my life happened in June. During National LGBTQ Pride Month. On June 26, 2015, I was in New York City with our high school students and some other adults when my cell phone pinged. The notice was alerting me to “Breaking News.” The Supreme Court of the United States had just ruled in the landmark civil rights case of Obergefell v. Hodges. In that ruling, it was held that the right of same-sex couples to marry on the same terms and conditions as opposite-sex couples, with all the accompanying rights and responsibilities, is guaranteed by both the Due Process Clause and the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution.

It was especially meaningful to be with our St. John’s high school students. Our youth reflect the spiritually progressive faith perspectives of our congregation. We have been ordaining LGBTQ persons to serve as deacons in the life of St. John’s for years; not because these are LGBTQ persons, but because these are actively faithful models of Christian influence and spiritual integrity among us. These are persons who follow Jesus in servant faith.

Later that day, I was able to say to some of our youth, “Today, some of your relatives and friends and many other persons you may meet one day found a new depth of freedom. They have been living with limitations that have imprisoned them. These LGBTQ persons have not been able to be citizens in the full expression of freedom. But, today, the Supreme Court announced a ruling that changes some laws and introduces a new way of living for many Americans.” Then, I added, “I hope you will always remember where you were when this decision was announced.”

Through the day, in many places around New York City and over digital communications, a variety of voices were expressed about the Supreme Court’s ruling. It is good to practice words like “love one another” and “walk humbly with God.” On June 26, 2015, this nation practiced another important truth: pursuing liberty and justice for all requires that we pursue liberty and justice for each. On that day, we were caring for our national soul.

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views

That evening, one of the youth came to me with these words: “I called my cousin today. He and his partner are now planning to be married. He met you a couple of years ago and he wanted me to ask if you would be willing to officiate their wedding.” “Yes, please,” I said. You see, St. John’s had already adopted a “Marriage is Commitment” position. Ministers were granted total freedom to perform weddings in the sanctuary or anywhere else for LGBTQ persons. Our process included several forums for conversations about theological perspectives, scripture passage interpretations, cultural biases and wedding customs and language. We studied the history and meaning of marriage and weddings with special attention given to how marriage is about commitment.

Beloved readers, during that week in New York City, our students participated in an interfaith immersion exploration. We served communion to a homeless community in Harlem, toured the Jewish Holocaust Museum and the 9/11 Memorial & Museum, met with persons from various faith traditions, took lunches to persons living with AIDS, worked on a rooftop vegetable garden used in an urban food project through Rauschenbusch Ministries and served in soup kitchens built on top of underground tunnels used as part of the underground railroad in the 1800s. Their world was enlarged. Yet, it is my hope that they will always remember one more moment in that week.

You should know that when my cell phone pinged announcing, “Breaking News,” we were riding on the Staten Island Ferry passing directly in front of The Statue of Liberty. Although I could not read the quote by Emma Lazarus from the middle of New York Harbor, I recited the words in silence: “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be free.” I stared at the Mother of Exiles in that moment and noticed her torch lamp seemed to touch some people with a new warmth. And, by the way, as I stared at Lady Liberty in that moment, I noticed she was smiling. : : — Rev. Dennis W. Foust, Ph.D., is Senior Minister of St. John’s Baptist Church located at 300 Hawthorne Ln., Charlotte, NC 28204. For more on the church and his ministry, visit stjohnsbaptistchurch.org.

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dishing with buff faye

by Buff Faye :: qnotes contributor :: info@bufffaye.com

Will a ‘Plus Size, Big Girl’ finally win RPDR? Will a “Plus Size, Big Girl” finally win “Ru Paul’s Drag Race?” Nobody knows the answer, but RuPaul, of course. But we can speculate.

There is no question that Eureka O’Hara is my favorite on Season 10 of “RuPaul’s Drag Race.”

She has the makeup skills of Season 6 Darienne Lake. She has the attitude, charisma and unlimited branding potential of Season 4 Latrice Royale.

She has the comedy of Season 7 Ginger Minj.

And she has the dance moves — well, frankly, I don’t know another big girl who can do what she does dancing?! So there’s the hype. And I truly believe she could be the first plus size, big girl to win, and here are my five reasons why…

1. Eureka is Season 10. I mean seriously what would “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 10 be like without her? Eureka on Season 10 is like if you took “Godzilla,” “Mothra,” “Destoroyah” and all the monsters and put them into one to create “Super Fabulous Mega Dragzilla.” She is a blockbuster. And every week, thanks to The Vixen, we tuned in to see if either The Vixen or Eureka would fight it out. She’s the elephant in the room.

Um. The show revolves around her.

2. Skills, lewks and intelligence. Eureka is smart. She knows how to play the game. On top of it, she has impeccable style, makeup skills, can sew and even whip up a wig topper out of scraps. Eureka is the epitome of drag.

She only fucked up a runway challenge once that I am aware of. And the moment of the “Double Shantay, You Stay” was priceless TV to watch.

3. Social Media is Abuzz.

Everyone loves someone and loves to hate someone more. That is the sad world we live in. Social media hate toward Eureka has ensued from day one around

pretty much everything. Some people complained that Eureka had an advantage coming back to the show.

Of course, then there were the issues that happened around The Vixen and people had a lot to say. Then Eureka has been constantly criticized and fat shamed on Reddit and Instagram over her weight and somehow by being “body positive” setting a bad example for big girls (and boys) like herself. Oh, and then there was some issue at DragCon where Asia couldn’t get a photo with Eureka?! Anyway, you know what? All that controversy makes for a good what? Winner!

4. Drag with a purpose. Bullying fat kids or even making jokes poking fun at fat people is still okay in our society. Fat shaming happens in what we say, what we do and how our society functions every day. Eureka O’Hara, the Elephant Queen, to the rescue! Eureka authentically wants to make a difference around “body positivity.” Just take a listen to her spoken word titled “Phat Boy Riot.” Eureka uniquely speaks to the kids and adults out there who have always struggled with their weight and size. She is the perfect messenger — nearly 7 foot tall, P.H.A.T. (Pretty Hot and Tasty as she calls it) and built like a school bus.

Her purpose is clear — “be yourself to free yourself” — and love all of who you are.

5. The Moment. RuPaul is one smart cookie.

She loves drag queens who have embraced who they are. RuPaul does not shy away from controversy and uses it to her advantage. She speaks out for causes, and somewhere in her heart, I believe she loves big girl drag queens. I mean she knew Divine after all. After 10 seasons, the moment is right for the big girl. And out of any “plus size, big girl” Eureka deserves it. What will Ru do?

Alright, so those are my five reasons why I think a big girl will win Season 10. Discuss among fan girls. Agree or disagree in the comments. Tell me who your favorite is to win and why. And remember, if the big girl doesn’t win, I guess we always have “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 11 or “AllStars” Season 4.

DRAG TIP: Here’s another prediction. Looking into my crystal ball and among the stars in the night sky, I predict a North Carolina queen finally makes it on “RuPaul’s Drag Race” Season 11. Oh, and I win the lottery too. Stay tuned.

— Buff Faye calls the Queen City her home and loves chocolate chip cookies for dessert (plus she loves to raise money for charities). Find her at your favorite bars and hot spots. And don’t forget her monthly Saturday night shows, Sunday drag brunch and regular Friday night party bus.

Learn more at AllBuff.com.

Follow on Twitter @BuffFaye Photo Credit: Roxy Taylor

SHOUT OUTS: Dragging with the Stars is coming up on Sunday, June 10. Please get tickets online at AllBuff.com and help us raise money for Carolina Breast Friends.

June 1-14 . 2018

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tell trinity

by Trinity :: qnotes contributor :: trinity@telltrinity.com

He loves me, he love me… maybe?

Hey Girl, There’s a guy at the [gay] club who I think likes me. But sometimes he says he’s “bi,” sometimes “just curious” and other times he’s says he’s “straight.” Yet he kissed me twice in the last four months when he was sober. What should I do?

The Daily Report, Milwaukee, Wisconsin Hey Daily Report, First the bad news: even though he sounds like a fun, straight/bi-curious, undecided guy who enjoys your gay company, this really fits more into the “wasting your time” category than the “true life boyfriend” category. By constantly changing sexualities, he probably just wants to be liked and not break your heart. So now the good news, honey!

Enjoy him as a friend. Even though catching a straight fish is exciting, a gay fish will stay longer and let you taste its meat.

Dearest Trinity, My friend of three years and I became boyfriends a few months ago, but we’ve only had “weird” sex, twice. Oh yeah, he also just moved away, so I never see him anymore and when I do, he doesn’t seem interested. Does he still want me?

Dead Desires, Harrisburg, PA

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Dearest Dead Desires, Let me get this right. He moved away, you hardly see him and when you do he never wants to have sex. Not only is he not your boyfriend, but he’s not anything except an old friend you had bad sex with twice. So, to be point blank, it’s over, if it even started. Now, pumpkin, go find a new boyfriend who wants to please you…not tease you! Good luck!

Hello Trinity, My very “spiritual” boyfriend keeps pushing me to work less and appreciate life more.

What am I supposed to do when I’m not working? Shop, surf the internet, watch TV? I like working. How else am I going to make money?

Work vs. Life, Elizabeth, NJ Hello Work vs. Life, You are dead right and dead wrong. In order to be wealthy, you do have to work and work hard. I applaud you for that. However, have you heard of inner wealth? Well, baby, maybe it’s time! (You can have a whole bunch of cash or you can find much wealth in what you experience in life and those with whom you surround yourself. Can you say “Sat Nam?” Take a look at my cartoon to see how I manage it.)

Dear Trinity, My girlfriend is always late. It’s becoming a big problem, not for her as much as for me. Help!

Late Date, San Diego, CA Dear Late Date, Waiting for someone once is awful, but waiting time and time again can make you loony. However, sweetie, there are alternatives, like: Trinity’s Tough Tips For Dealing With Someone Who’s Always Late 1. Communication: Ask for a 30-minute warning before she’s actually due and/or another 10-minute warning before she actually arrives!

2. Lie: If dinner is 6 p.m., tell him 5:30 p.m. and never be ready before 5:45 p.m.

3. Warning: Let her know, if she wants to be late she just needs to call and tell you. She does not need an excuse!

4. N o Excuses: Tell him no excuse is necessary. It’s about communicating his lateness before he’s late, not having good excuses after he’s arrived.

5. A cceptance: Just accept that she will often be late, and this is how it will be. Don’t act all upset and surprised every time!

6. S tay Busy: Always keep busy with things to do while waiting for a typically late person.

7. The Truth: Being late is not a crime, punishment or international offense. It’s just how some people are.

8. The Other Foot: Remember, if he’s always late, then you can always be late too and never feel bad.

9. Ending the Stress: It’s better for you to call and “check in” 15 minutes before she’s due than to wait angrily hoping she calls you.

10. Lastly, Attitude: Yes, you can make someone feel bad for being late, but after a few times you better accept it with open arms or…find someone else to put your arms around! info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.

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out in print

by Terri Schlichenmeyer :: qnotes contributor

Duberman recounts painful era “The Rest of It: Hustlers, Cocaine, Depression, and Then Some 1976-1988”

by Martin Duberman © 2018, Duke University Press $27.95 / higher in Canada, 242 pages Parts of your life are missing.

Maybe you’ve forgotten, purposefully or by accident. You were overwhelmed and didn’t look, too influenced by love, anger or adult beverages to take full notice. Sometimes, you wonder what’s missing, but in the new book, “The Rest of It: Hustlers, Cocaine, Depression, and Then Some 1976-1988” by Martin Duberman, one man’s gaps are filled.

Having penned other books of memoirs, Martin Duberman says that people often ask him why he’s omitted roughly a decade of his life story. Once the pattern had been noted, he realized that “the mid-seventies to the mid-eighties… were the most painful years of my life.”

They began with his mother’s illness in late 1976, and her surgery for cancer that was initially said to be non-cancerous, but that was finally diagnosed as malignant melanoma.

Duberman had had a complicated relationship with his mother, and they’d made their peace; still, hers was a horrible death and it plunged him into his work, and a bout with depression.

For years, Duberman had been involved in the LGBTQ community as an activist, and “in the wake of my mother’s death, I hadn’t jumped ship, hadn’t abandoned academia or run off to join the circus.” Still, he looked for ways to cope: he had his “circadian chart” read and he used a fair amount of cocaine and pot.

He immersed himself in projects, both of the literary kind and for the gay community, and he picked up his political engagements. Duberman

Author Martin Duberman.

worried that the stress was bad for him — and he may’ve been right, because he had a few health scares, including a heart attack, and another bout with depression and “desperation.”

Still, he continued to write. It was a time “of a flowering of gay culture” when many gay literary giants were publishing — and that included Duberman himself. It was a time when bath houses dotted New York City, AIDS was emerging as a crisis, and Duberman was celibate and addicted.

It was a time when he had nearly hit bottom before he found help and love.

You may be thinking that “The Rest of It” is on the self-contemplative side — and you’re right, though it could also be argued that many memoirs are such. No matter; what keeps you reading isn’t the biography that author Martin Duberman offers here.

It’s what’s behind it.

Duberman’s life was keenly interesting in the dozen years between 1976 and 1988, but so were then-current events, which he carefully recounts. This book shows an emergence of gay culture on a larger scale, growing activism, and the dawn of AIDS; his voice is occasionally snarky as he takes on the medical establishment of the times, gay nightclubs and bath houses, and Reagan politics. In these ways, his deeply personal memories, mixed with what happened when, are vastly more appealing than if this book were mere memoir.

Though it may not attract casual readers under “a certain age,” this book is perfect for older readers who remember these times. Also, for historians’ bookshelves, “The Rest of It” shouldn’t be missing. : :

Photo Credit: Alan Barnett

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EVENTS

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June 2018 Continues through June 10 ‘Spring Awakening’ Theatre Charlotte 501 Queens Rd., Charlotte Times vary Theatre Charlotte takes on the iconic rock musical “Spring Awakening,” a celebration of self-discovery and emerging sexuality, which scored eight Tony Awards during its Broadway run. Tickets are $28. theatrecharlotte.org.

–––––––––––––––––––– Continues through June 23 ‘The 39 Steps’ Hadley Theater at Queens University 2132 Radcliffe Ave., Charlotte Times vary Actors’ Theatre of Charlotte returns to the stage this Tony Award-winning comedic take on Hitchcock’s classic 1935 film adaptation, with a pop-up pub at each Friday performance.

The official June 6 opening follows half-price previews June 1 and 2. Regular ticket prices $25-$44. atcharlotte.org.

SEP JUN MO

00 01

Voice and Communication SEP JUN MO Workshop with New Leaf Voice 3800 Monroe Rd., Charlotte 4-5:30 p.m.

Transcend Charlotte presents an educational event focusing on vocal health and expression, led by licensed speech language pathologist Gretchen McGinty.

Registration is free and can be completed online. bit.ly/transcendvoice.

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HIV Speaks on Jones Street SEP JUN MO North Carolina General Assembly 16 W. Jones St., Raleigh 8 a.m.-3 p.m.

The North Carolina AIDS Action Network holds its annual day of advocacy designed to “educate our state legislators about policies that improve the lives of people living with HIV and AIDS in our state.”

Registration begins at 8 a.m. followed by advocacy and issue training and legislative visits. Details and advance registration are available online. Participation is free, but a donation of $10 or $25 is appreciated. bit.ly/hivspeaks2018.

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The Golden Girls Drag Queen Trivia Vida Cantina 210 E. Trade St., Charlotte 7-9 p.m.

Head to Vida Mexican Kitchen & Cantina and put your Golden Girls knowledge to the test with multiple rounds of trivia, competing for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place prizes while enjoying themed cocktails and taco specials.

Arrive early to register your team, or sign up online. This is a free event. bit.ly/goldendrag.

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Continues through June 17 SEP JUN MO What Happens on the Beach, Stays on the Beach Crown Reef Beach Resort & Waterpark 2913 S. Ocean Blvd., Myrtle Beach Billed as a first annual LGBTQ Pride event, the four-day festival will feature live entertainment and celebrity guests in a party atmosphere. Tickets for individual events start at $15, with allaccess passes available starting at $100. bit.ly/onmyrtlebeach.

Carolina Voices ‘Creative A Capella’ Duke Energy Theater at Spirit Square 345 N. College St., Charlotte 3 p.m. and 8 p.m.

‘Six Characters in Search of a Play’ Theatre Charlotte 501 Queens Rd., Charlotte 7-10 p.m.

Del Shores, acclaimed writer-director of “Sordid Lives” and “Southern Baptist Sissies,” stages a one-night-only performance of his new oneman show. The event will benefit Stonewall Sports Charlotte.

General admission tickets start at $25. bit.ly/sixcharacters.

Carolina Voices’ 18-member ensemble Impromptu delivers a collection of original material and unconventional arrangements of familiar songs to close out its 2017-2018 season. Tickets start at $15. carolinavoices.org.

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Salisbury Pride Festival SEP JUN MO E. Fisher S.t & S. Lee St., Salisbury 11 a.m.-5 p.m.

This free, family-friendly event is Salisbury’s largest festival, with more than 4,000 attendees every year.

Come on out to the city’s historic downtown district and enjoy a variety of local artists, performers, vendors and more. salisburypride.com.

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Pride in Business Expo & Career Fair Hilton Embassy Suites 401 E. Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., Charlotte 2-7 p.m.

SEP JUN MO

Lesbian Speed Dating Arcana Bar & Lounge 331 W. Main St., Durham 7:30-10 p.m.

Triangle-area matchmaking and dating coaching service Authentic Connections hosts its first lesbian speed dating event. The event is limited to 20 participants. Tickets are $30 and available online. bit.ly/authenticlesbian.

SEP JUN MO

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SEP JUN MO

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‘Cleaning Out the Closet’ SEP JUN MO Olio’s 245 W. Garrison Blvd., Gastonia 7 p.m.

Presented by Black Star Theater Company and with all proceeds to benefit PFLAG, “Cleaning Out the Closet” showcases “a collection of coming out stories mixed with music and dance.”

Local LGBTQ community leaders will also be present as special guests to share their stories. Tickets are $10. bit.ly/cleaningout.

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The Charlotte LGBT Chamber of Commerce invites you to expand your professional network at their annual expo, sponsored in part by Charlotte Pride and showcasing more than 75 businesses and non-profit organizations. clgbtcc.org.

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Ensley continued from page 12 and woodpecker-bait Charlie McCarthy.) He discovered his song-and-dance destiny a few years later, partnering his dance teacher’s granddaughter in ballroom competitions.

Since then, his day and night jobs have intertwined.

He was pushing a mail cart at the law firm of Robinson, Bradshaw & Hinson when a senior partner saw him in “Barnum,” juggling and walking a tightrope. “They figured, ‘This mail guy must have some talent,’ and I ended up as director of office operations,” says Ensley.

Later, frequent co-star Pat Heiss told Ensley her husband was starting Rexus to check applicants in professions ranging from health care to trucking to banking. Ensley went to work there in 2001 and now runs the company, meeting with clients from Puerto Rico to Alaska.

If the picture of a type-A personality has begun to form, dispel it. He’s meticulous but not obsessive, dedicated but not hard-driven.

“He is intuitive on- and offstage,” says Actor’s Theatre of Chip Decker, who has acted with Ensley and directed him. “He instinctively knows what a role or a moment should feel like. But he also spends a great deal of time exploring things, whether he’s directing or part of the cast. Theater (is about) having a vision and being able to delegate.

Billy always knows what he wants…and will guide the process accordingly, but he realizes collaboration is key.

“People who saw ‘Hedwig’ assumed that, because it’s a musical, it was just another role. (He worked) hard to make it look easy. He spent months making himself mentally and physically ready to perform on a nightly basis. Often actors don’t prepare, and it shows halfway into a run.

Billy never takes any task within theater lightly.

He busts his butt.”

The self-destructive title character in “Hedwig” burned Ensley into Charlotte’s theatrical memory like no other. Over more than a decade, he played the part three times and directed a fourth production. At 52, this glam rock fan donned drag, wigs and glitter to play the role one last time in an Actor’s Theatre of Charlotte production chosen by audience votes.

“It’s exciting and horrifying to be Hedwig, because you have to be so vulnerable,” he says. “I owed Chip and Dan (Shoemaker) a lot at Actor’s Theatre. So I got on the treadmill and lost weight to turn myself into this waifish crackhead again. There’s always been a connection between me and underdogs, people on the fringes of society.”

a&e

something’s gratuitous or intended to shock, there’s no reason for that. The end of Act 1 of ‘Spring Awakening’ has a sex scene with some nudity involved, and it’s necessary. You can make that sensual and sexual and beautiful, nothing to be ashamed of.”

Theatre Charlotte executive director Ron Law admires Ensley because “he does a lot of pre-production work with the script: characterizations, concept, style. He likes to begin designer discussions as early prior to auditions or rehearsals as possible. He always has a strong vision but is flexible – which is something he knows he has to be in (our) facility.

He knows the limitations of the space, but he doesn’t compromise quality.

“He works one-on-one with featured performers, so discussions don’t take up other actors’ time…. He is soft-spokenly assertive: He knows what he wants and pushes, but he is not loud and aggressive. Actors adore working with him.”

What Ensley most wants after 15 years of directing is a show where nobody sings or dances. Tom Hollis, hearing that, nods his head: “‘Type’ is the four-letter word in theater. It’s easy for producers to say, ‘Well, he’s the musical theater guy. He’s good at that.’”

Ensley has long since proved his versatility as the crazed soldier in “House of Blue Leaves,” the Neil Simon stand-in of “Biloxi Blues” and “Broadway Bound” and especially the creepily sympathetic Katurian in

❝ He is intuitive on- and offstage. He instinctively knows what a role or a moment should feel like. ... Theater (is about) having a vision and being able to delegate. Billy always knows what he wants. ❞

‘It’s an honor’ Ensley says he’s finally “sated” with performing. Instead, he has become a busy director. He’s Theatre Charlotte’s go-to guy for edgier musicals: “Avenue Q,” “Rent,” “Jesus Christ Superstar” and now “Spring Awakening.”

Those require a unique blend of tact and hard-hitting emotional honesty in community theater productions. Ensley doesn’t find those aspects mutually exclusive.

“Any elements required to tell the story as intended will be in (my shows),” he says. “If

— Chip Decker on Billy Ensley

“The Pillowman.” (That won him a best actor award a decade ago from Metrolina Theatre Association.) But varied directing opportunities elude him.

He acknowledges this without regret. In fact, he says everything without regret. His dual life has brought contentment, he says, and he doesn’t wonder what might’ve happened if he’d driven north all those years ago.

“Some contemporaries said I wasn’t serious about my art, because I didn’t suffer for it,” he recalls. “I reject that idea. There’s never been any lack of seriousness when I performed. It’s an honor to do live theater, and I never took it for granted. How great it is to immerse yourself in a character who’s nothing like you!

“Charlotte sorely needed good live theater back then, which was a valid reason to stay. It still does.” : : ‘Spring Awakening’ When: May 25-June 10 at 7:30 p.m.

Wednesday-Thursday, 8 p.m. FridaySaturday, 2:30 p.m. Sunday, 11:30 p.m. June 1 Where: Theatre Charlotte, 501 Queens Rd. Tickets: $28 Details: 704-372-1000, theatrecharlotte.org

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