QNotes Oct. 16-29, 2010

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

qnotes

qnotes

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

inside Oct. 16-29, 2010 Vol 25 No 12

news & features 6 6 12 14

Candidate Brandon seeks 60th ENC to honor five Carolinians News Notes: Regional Briefs Women, know your risks

arts & entertainment 16 18 21 25 27

Tomlin takes Charlotte Out in the Stars Audiophile Tell Trinity Q events calendar

opinions & views 4 4 5 5 15

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Editor’s Note TalkBack General Gayety QPoll T-Notes

contributors this issue Robbi Cohn, Matt Comer, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, Leslie Robinson, David Stout, Trinity

front page Graphic Design by Lainey Millen and Matt Comer Lily Tomlin image courtesy Greg Gorman.

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Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

qnotes

VIEWS

editor’s note by matt comer matt@goqnotes.com

It does get better, but only if we make it so

This month, I had the pleasure and privilege of working with a slew of Charlotte organizations that had come together to present a special candlelight vigil in memory of gay youth who’d taken their lives as the result of bullying, harassment and depression. Nearly a dozen local groups partnered to present the “It Gets Better” Charlotte candlelight vigil on Oct. 11 — a true community-wide effort to raise awareness. It’s an example of public outspokenness and media savvy I’d like to see more of in Charlotte.

In September, the national news media picked up on a string of gay youth suicides.

Their in-depth and relatively friendly reports following the tragedies focused on the plight of our young people as they navigate growing up in often tumultuous, negative and hostile climates at school, among their families and faith institutions and communities-at-large.

Though the epidemic of gay youth suicide is nothing new, the widespread attention paid to it last month was a rare opportunity in which LGBT communities across the country got to be heard, be seen and reach out to vulnerable teens and young adults.

In the aftermath of the news coverage, gay columnist Dan Savage initiated a brilliant new media campaign. Utilizing YouTube, he encourage people to film short clips with one, simple message: “It Gets Better.” Savage’s campaign has been a hit and served as the inspiration for the Charlotte vigil.

“It Gets Better” is an entirely appropriate message to send to young people. It’s a message I wish I could have heard earlier in my coming out process. Though I never actually attempted suicide, the thought crossed my mind more than a couple times.

In one instance, I found myself sitting in my bedroom, crying with blade in hand, wrist turned up. Thank God I never went through with it. Thank God I had the opportunity to grow up and learn first-hand that, indeed, life does get better.

That’s a message countless numbers of young LGBT people will never hear before they succumb to the hostility and outright hatred thrown at them daily by family members,

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friends, elected officials, school officials, faith leaders and others.

In his book “CRISIS: 40 Stories Revealing the Personal, Social and Religious Pain and Trauma of Growing Up Gay in America” — to which I also contributed — North Carolina philanthropist Mitchell Gold says the situation facing young LGBT people today is a silent, mental health epidemic.

“There are teenagers all over the world today in crisis mode because they fear what will happen if others discover their sexual orientation,” Gold says. “They suffer debilitating depression, isolation, addiction, and possibly suicidal thoughts. I hope and pray that not one more teenager will have to live this way, the way I grew up.”

Fortunately, the crisis facing our young people is preventable and has a solution: Swift and definitive action by governmental, social, civic, educational and religious institutions to both fully include and fully affirm the lives of all LGBT people will put an almost immediate halt to the trauma young people are facing. There can be no compromise. No waiting. No broken or unfulfilled promises. If we truly want a society in which all people are treated equally, with full dignity and respect, these things and more will have to happen — no ifs, ands or butts about it.

There is also a second component to this solution, one which must come first: LGBT community organizations and leaders will have to stand up and speak out as never before. Until our young people receive their God-given right to life and happiness, and until we have our full legal, social and religious equality, we must take a principled stand, quit playing “straight face” and be ready at any and every moment to defend ourselves and our children.

People can call us militant or radical all they want, but our equality must not ever be up for discussion or debate. We demand it.

We demand it now. We’re here, we’re queer and we ain’t gonna shut up until we see real changes. This is what our movement should be — for our sake, for our young people’s sake, for our future and theirs. : :

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An end to bullying starts in the home

In recent months, we have been made painfully aware of the suicides of several our youth in this country. Our teenagers are succumbing to the pressures of bullying at an alarming rate. How many more of these precious children need to be lost, their lives taken by their own hand, because of the tyranny of others in their schools?

School is supposed to be a haven of learning where adolescents can feel safe, yet for some, it has become the place of daily torment leaving them filled with anguish and despair.

The reasons that they are subjected to this cruelty vary. More recently, the publicized cases have been simply because the child was gay or suspected to be gay. However, the reach is broader, and the discrimination may be the result of an accent, a disability, or perhaps the way the child dresses. The reasons are different, but the root cause of the problem remains the same: intolerance.

The intolerance that’s so prevalent within these adolescents can sometimes be attributed to their own esteem issues, but I feel that much of the problem stems from the fact that these children aren’t being taught tolerance in the home. Instead, they carry on the bigotry of their well-meaning parents. I by no means admonish principals or teachers from their responsibility to monitor children’s behavior while they attend school or loosen my belief that stronger legislation needs to be put in place to protect our youth, but parents have the duty to instill compassion and caring for humankind in their children . This isn’t the duty of the schools or the legislature. Our children must be taught in our homes from a young age that they ought to love one another regardless of any apparent differences, just as we love them without regard to theirs. Parents, please teach your children well.

— Shannon Fallon, letter.

Fallon is public relations chair for Upstate SC Pride in Greenville/Spartanburg, S.C.

Fred Phelps and Free Speech

In response to Westboro Baptist Church’s free speech case at the Supreme Court (goqnotes.com/8749), two readers say: “Should it be legal to protest at funerals?”

Absolutely NOT! A funeral is not an occasion where it is fair to harass the bereaved. They are NOT in a normal state of mind. It is a PERSONAL ATTACK to do so. If my son were being buried and protesters showed up, there would be a lot more funerals in the making. That’s a promise.

— KevinKJT, web, Oct. 8 As much as I dislike the Phelps clan, if they lose in the SCOTUS then we all lose…No matter how much we hate what is said, We must

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qnotes

www.charlottebusinessguild.org Oct. 16-29 . 2010

Pride Charlotte

Readers respond to this year’s Pride Charlotte festival (goqnotes.com/8688): I attended this event and was pleased to see such a large attendance. There was a small pin being worn and I am hoping that someone will direct me to the source. It read (talk-action=0) — Sera Callif, web, Oct. 3 We had a great time at Pride this year and loved the new location. Everyone seemed to have a great time and enjoyed the various vendors and events that were offered. The only thing that I would even ask for is more of these types of events happening more often for our community throughout the year. Thanks to everyone involved.

— Brad Thomas, web, Oct. 4 The NC Music Factory was an ideal venue. I am glad I attended as I have for the past several years, because I had the opportunity to speak with some Indian Hindus about why Hinduism does NOT condemn the LGBT community. A great event.

— Shakti Subramanian, web, Oct. 4 The music factory is a great location but I still didn’t see people going into the Center.

There needs to be something to draw people inside. A Big Arrow? Performer autographs?

How many of those people actually knew where the Center was? And how many other people couldn’t get to Pride because public transportation doesn’t go near the Music Factory? Next year, think about doing a shuttle from the transportation center or someplace uptown.

— KJ, web, Oct. 7

Center leadership

Readers react to news of changes in Charlotte Center leadership (goqnotes. com/8709): John Stotler has been involved in this community for years. I hope his vision can help the center get back on track.

— KJ, web, Oct. 6 KJ, I too hope John can bring the center back to some sort of mission. It’s been lacking one for a long time now, and so many people int eh community would be so supportive if only the community center had the guts to do something, stand up for somehting, speak out for soemthing. But, no, it hasn’t done that in a long while.

— Oscar Meyer Weiner, web, Oct. 6

Tuesday, November 16, 2010 United Way CEO Jane McIntyre Crowne Plaza, 201 S. McDowell St. Cash Bar Social/Heavy Hor d’oeuvres @ 5:30 pm Program starts @ 6:45 pm $15 members, $20 non-members Call 704.565.5075 by 12 pm Friday, November 12, 2010 or email businessguild@yahoo.com to request tickets for this event

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defend their right to speak it. Over the Past few years the SCOTUS has been chipping away our rights all in the name of National Security, If we lost this right they we will never to able to question our government without the fear of being throw in jail.

— SNT, web, Oct. 8

by leslie robinson :: qnotes contributor

DADT’s hectic September Boy, there’s been a lot of action around Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT) lately. Let’s all follow the bouncing ball.

On Sept. 9, a federal judge in California declared DADT unconstitutional. Judge Virginia Phillips of Federal District Court struck down the military’s ban on openly gay soldiers after the plaintiffs challenged the law under the First and Fifth Amendments to the Constitution. It was the Log Cabin Republicans that brought the suit.

On Sept. 10, every gay organization kicked itself for allowing the gay GOP’ers to get there first.

On Sept. 12, two gay and two lesbian soldiers, all DADT victims, escorted Lady Gaga to the MTV Video Music Awards. The five people involved wore dress uniforms — for Lady Gaga, an Alexander McQueen ensemble including tall gold feathers on her head as a dress uniform. The former military members looked dignified and handsome.

On Sept. 13, I wondered if I could get a military escort for going to Safeway.

On Sept. 20, Lady Gaga turned up in Portland, Maine, to speak at a rally aimed at pressuring the state’s two senators to vote for DADT repeal. She suggested a new policy for straight soldiers who are “uncomfortable” being around gay soldiers.

She said, “Our new law is called ‘If you don’t like it, go home!’”

On Sept. 21, every American soldier in Afghanistan and Iraq claimed to be uncomfortable around gay soldiers and asked to go home.

Also on Sept. 21, political D-Day arrived.

The “D” wound up standing for “Doofuses.”

In the Senate, each Republican and two Democrats voted against repealing DADT. Everybody accused everybody of playing politics and everybody was right.

This vote was a blow to the gay solar plexus. But, it’s possible the Senate might address the issue again after the elections.

We can hope during a lame-duck session the senators will act more like owls and less like ostriches.

Often in our struggles we’ve had to count

VIEWS

general gayety

on politicians, judges and voters treating us fairly because it was the right thing to do. Now we actually have public opinion on our side — according to a recent ABC News/Washington Post poll, over 75 percent of Americans think gays should be allowed to serve openly in the military. Such approval feels weird, but I could force myself to get used to it.

Again on Sept. 21, the LGBT site JoeMyGod.com reported on the Senate vote, and someone left this comment: “All Faggots must die.” The message was traced to the office of Georgia Republican Sen. Saxby Chambliss.

On Sept. 22, Chambliss’ office issued a statement saying that so far it was unknown which person there left the comment. Then I issued a statement saying apparently the senator hires staffers with the soul of a plum pit.

On Sept. 23, U.S. government lawyers filed to stop Judge Phillips (see Sept. 9) from issuing an injunction that would immediately halt DADT. They argued she should confine any injunction to the 19,000 members of the Log Cabin Republicans.

Now, there’s a bizarre idea. Only Republican gays can be soldiers.

In further bizarreness, the White House tried to explain why government lawyers were defending a policy President Obama wants to eradicate. Press Secretary Robert Gibbs must go through Excedrin like candy.

On Sept. 24, a federal judge in Tacoma, Wash., ruled that Maj. Margaret Witt, a lesbian and decorated flight nurse booted from the Air Force, should get her job back.

U.S. District Judge Ronald Leighton, an active Republican, became emotional as he recalled some of Witt’s testimony.

He decided her discharge advanced no legitimate military interest and, in fact, weakened her squadron. So, an open lesbian is going back to the military.

Two weeks of a DADT roller coaster.

Forget cautiously optimistic — I’m nauseously optimistic. : : info:

LesRobinson@aol.com . generalgayety.com

qpoll

Do you think a repeal to ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ (DADT) will be passed before the end of this year?

See the options and vote: goqnotes.com/to/qpoll

I hope that in November, the Senate will vote on the defense act and we’ll be able to get it passed.

— Kevin Scott, former ROTC at The Citadel

I believe it will be passed, and I think the politicians will listen to America, which is strongly behind the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”

— Michael Noftzger, U.S. Army, discharged under DADT

I think it will be tough, but I think it will be soon.

— Mary Lemay, Marine Corps, discharged prior to DADT

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

qnotes

NEWS

Collaboration, education keys to success, says House candidate Marcus Brandon hopes to represent House District 60

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Marcus Brandon says he grew up steeped in traditions of Civil Rights legacies.

That’s not a rare occurrence, especially for a young person growing up around Greensboro and who later attended North Carolina A&T University.

“I’ve been involved with politics for as long as I’ve been able to walk,” Brandon says. “I come from a family of Civil Rights leaders who were very involved in the movement and were very civically engaged. I was passing out fliers and knocking on doors and

going to community meetings since I can remember. It’s always been a part of my life.”

After attending college and working in the private sector, Brandon says he still enjoyed doing activism and Civil Rights work.

“I never knew you could actually get paid and work in it,” he says. “I decided I needed to do something different with my skills. I had worked in the private sector doing sales and I wanted to use my skills to do something more.

I packed up my bags and moved to D.C.” There, Brandon started work with NGP Software, a top Democratic technology firm. He was introduced to clients across the country and gained experience with political fundraising.

Soon, he was headed back to the Carolinas, working on a Democratic campaign to defeat Republican South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford.

A few more stints in other campaigns — including President Jimmy Carter’s son’s campaign to unseat Republican U.S. Sen. John Ensign and work with non-profit groups like Progressive Majority and Equality Virginia — eventually landed him a job working as national finance director in Dennis Kucinich’s 2008 campaign for the White House.

Brandon has since moved back to his childhood home. There, he decided to run for the state House of Representatives and defeated 10-year incumbent Rep. Earl Jones in the Democratic primary. Brandon faces Republican Lonnie Wilson on Nov. 5.

The 35-year-old political consultant says he decided to run after he realized his hometown needed a change.

“I decided I wanted to have a different conversation we’ve not Thirty-five-year-old political consultant had, particularly in my community, Marcus Brandon is running to fill Earl Jones’ seat in the House of Representatives. for a long time,” Brandon says. “The

incumbent that I beat had been in office since I was five-years old — first on the city council and then as a state representative.

He’s a nice guy and he is one of my heroes; I worked on one of his campaigns when I was younger. But, we need to have a different conversation now.”

Brandon’s perspective on change and his ousting of an incumbent might at first glance conjure up images of the increasing antiincumbent fervor analysts and pundits say is sweeping the nation. But, Brandon is no Tea Partier. He’s a a solid progressive, and willing to stick his neck out in service to constituents. Among his biggest concerns are jobs and education.

“We’ve moved beyond the politics of the sit-in movement,” Brandon says. “That conversation has changed from who can sit in the restaurant to who can now afford to sit in the restaurant. That goes beyond racial lines. We need to move to a conversation that is more encompassing and representative of more people.”

Making sure money is spent wisely and effectively is going to be key to building community, Brandon says: “We have to make sure that the money going to agencies is being used collaboratively — that people are maximizing their own dollars and participating with both civil organizations and local, private industry,” he says.

In addition to wisely spent money on job creation, Brandon says more focus should be placed on education across the state.

“We are continuously talking about education in terms of dollars,” he says. “We’ve been talking about the education gap since I was in kindergarten, and that gap hasn’t moved. We can throw as much money as we want into education, but we are throwing money at a broken system. We can’t afford to do that.”

Brandon also says we can’t wait to fix education. The nation, he says, ranks low on educational achievement and it is a problem

created by a “cookie cutter, one-size-fits-all” approach.

“When I knock on doors and talk to voters, I ask parents with multiple children, ‘Do each of your children learn the same or differently?’ and nine times out of 10, parents say, ‘All of my children have different learning styles,’” he says. “What we have is all of their children taking the same tests. That’s the way our state and national systems work. This type of education isn’t going to work in this one household, so how is it valid for all eighth grade science and math students?”

Education, he insists, must be individualized. “We have to put education back into the hands of its stake-holders: parents, teachers and students. They are the ones who will be able to best make the decision of what is most effective.”

Brandon says he’s most excited about the possibility of continuing the work he’s known since childhood.

“I’ll get to do what I’ve always done, and that is fight for equal opportunity and access for all people and that includes the AfricanAmerican community, of which I happen to be, and the LGBT community, of which I also happen to be,” he says.

That sense of inclusion and fairness was instilled in him as a child: “I’m a descendent of the Civil Rights Movement and its a part of my very core — the values that my nana and parents taught me and that’s that everybody in this country should have access to equal opportunity.”

Whether he’s talking about jobs, education, housing, food stamps or equality, Brandon insists every one has a right to be seated at the table.

“We still have to fight for everyone, whether you’re an LGBT youth or an AfricanAmerican woman or a white male,” he says.

“It is all a matter of fighting for access and opportunity for all of your constituents, and I’m am very excited about being able to get into the legislature and do that.” : :

COMMUNITY

Equality NC honors five Carolinians Statewide group to bestow awards in November Equality North Carolina has chosen their first-ever round of Equality Champions. This is the fourth year the group will hold a conference and gala, and the fourth time it will present its Legislative Leadership Award, but the group announced this year it would also start honoring community members and advocates who are engaging in LGBT community building across the state.

The group has chosen five Champions, each from five different parts of the state. The Champions are profiled below, reprinted in part from Equality North Carolina press materials.

Roberta Dunn, Charlotte Roberta is being recognized for her outstanding leadership and work with the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department on behalf of Charlotte’s LGBT community. She has led the effort to open communication with CMPD officials and successfully encouraged CMPD and its chief to hold an open forum with the LGBT community. As a result of her efforts, CMPD may now also create an LGBT community liaison position.

Roberta is a transgender woman. She has been married

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Oct. 16-29 . 2010

for 27 years and has four children. Since her retirement five years ago, she has been living her life as the person she always felt she was, a woman. She is active in the Charlotte/Mecklenburg area in several organizations including HRC, MeckPAC, and Carolina Transgender Society. Her goal in working through these organizations is to promote greater understanding and acceptance of the LGBT community and its needs.

Ellen W. Gerber, Triad Despite her “retirement” at the end of 1991, Ellen W. “Lennie” Gerber has continued to practice law on a volunteer basis by assisting on cases, doing research, and drafting documents for various civil rights organizations including the ACLU of North Carolina, the North Carolina Gay Advocacy Legal Alliance (NCGALA), the National Center for Lesbian Rights, and the Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund.

That work led, in 1997, to the privilege of arguing the case of

Pulliam v. Smith to the Supreme Court of North Carolina.

From 1992 through 2001, Lennie worked extensively as a volunteer with Summit House, a community corrections program designed to keep families together. In 1994, she realized a long-term goal when, with two other attorneys, she co-founded NCGALA. Lennie’s long-time partner of 44 years and counting is Pearl Berlin.

Rev. Joe Hoffman and Noel Nickle, Western When Noel and Joe were married, they had a religious wedding in North Carolina and a legal wedding in Vermont,

see ENC on 11

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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ENC honors Carolinians continued from page 6

acknowledging that their gay and lesbian friends and family members could not (yet) be legally married in North Carolina. Noel is a capital mitigation specialist and works with individuals facing the death penalty. Joe is Senior Pastor of the First Congregational United Church of Christ in Asheville, where he has served since 1996. They live in Asheville with their children.

Both Noel and Joe have been involved in LGBTQ advocacy for many years. In 2001, Noel advocated for and led a year-long process for First Congregational to become an Open and Affirming (ONA) congregation. Together, with Rev. Mahan Siler, they helped found a local, grassroots organization, “People of Faith for Just Relationships,” which advocates for marriage equality. In 2005 this group partnered with other LGBTQ supportive groups to form The Coalition for Equality. Noel and Joe also co-chaired with Laurey Masterton “Love Makes a Family,” a program of the Center for Diversity Education at the University of North Carolina at Asheville.

Aaron Lucier, Eastern Aaron Lucier is the current faculty/staff advisor for the Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgendered Student Union (GLBTSU) at East Carolina University, and has worked with the student group in this role for 14 years. He is active in the Greenville community working with issues related to social justice, HIV/AIDS, and creating social outlets/connections for the local GLBT community. Aaron is the current president of the board of the Pitt County AIDS Service Organization, and also volunteers on

a disaster action team with the Pitt County Chapter of the American Red Cross.

Aaron is employed as the director of housing operations in the Campus Living department at ECU. As a college housing professional, he has served as the chair of the Association of College and University Housing Officers International’s GLBT Concerns Committee, and in 2008 was awarded the association’s Judy Spain Award for his work with GLBT issues and students.

Joshua Lee Weaver, Triangle Joshua is a native of North Carolina.

Since Proposition 8 passed in California in November of 2008, he has become an activist for LGBT rights. Joshua’s accomplishments are many, but what points best to his work for LGBT equality in North Carolina is his work to persuade the city of Durham to adopt a same-sex marriage resolution. His proposal to the city was accepted, and was featured on local news and in local papers, blogs, and even The Advocate. Not content with just getting one city to accept same-sex marriage, Joshua has expanded his efforts to other North Carolina cities.

Joshua is one of many younger activists to have become involved in LGBT equality work over the past few years. His dedication speaks for itself, and clearly he already inspires many people. He received thirteen nominations to be our 2010 Equality Champion for the Triangle Region! : : — Compiled by Equality North Carolina.

Reprinted with permission.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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BRIEFS

news notes: from the carolinas, nation and world compiled by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com | David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com | Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Carter receives kudos RALEIGH — Mandy Carter, a selfdescribed “out, southern, black, lesbian, social justice advocate” has been named recipient of the LGBT Center of Raleigh’s First Annual Distinguished Service Award. The premiere event was held on Oct. 16 at Sitti Restaurant as part of the 2010 Raleigh is Coming Out festivities.

This recognition is given to an individual who has contributed significantly to the LGBT community through their leadership, activism or fundraising efforts.

Carter is no stranger to North Carolina advocacy. For 42 years she has been championing causes across gender and race lines.

She was a participant at the March on Washington for Lesbians and Gays in 1987 and 1993, serving on the national steering committee. She was a founding member of Our Own Place and UMOJA. Additionally, she has been a board member with the Black Gay and Lesbian Leadership Form, International Federation

For more information, visit parkwayunited. org and welcomingresources.org/sosp.htm.

— M.C.

Charlotte Guild meeting slated

CHARLOTTE — The Charlotte Business Guild will hold its monthly meeting on Oct. 19 and will welcome Take the Lake, a social group in the Lake Norman area that converges on local establishments, and Q.U.I.C.K. Queers United in Concord/Kannapolis, as its presenters.

Social hour starts at 5:30 p.m. at Crowne Plaza Hotel, 201 S. McDowell St., with hors d’oeuvres and a cash bar. Dinner follows.

Reservations are $15 members/$20 without reservations (at the door) and nonmembers.

To reserve a spot, call 704-565-5075 or email businessguild@yahoo.com. Aren’t a member? Join at the door and get in free.

Attend a free CBG at the Movies event on Oct. 20 at the Van Landingham Estate, 2010 The Plaza from 6-9 p.m. “The Blind Side” will be the featured film. This screening is open only to members and their guests (limited to one per member) and entitles each to free admission, parking and concessions (hot dogs, nachos, popcorn and candy). Jud Gee serves as event sponsor.

Membership dues are: $50/single; $80/ couple; $40/senior (60+); and $25/student (21+ with current student identification).

For more information, visit charlottebusinessguild.org.

— L.M.

Triad Shower of Stoles on exhibit

WINSTON-SALEM — Parkway United Church of Christ, 2151 Silas Creek Pkwy., is hosting a special exhibit of 50 liturgical stoles and other items symbolic of the lives of LGBT people of faith from the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force’s Shower of Stoles collection.

The exhibit runs through Oct. 24 and is open to the public on Sundays after the church’s 11 a.m. worship service. Admission is free.

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of Black Prides, National Stonewall Democratic Federation, the Triangle Foundation, Equal Partners in Faith, Ladyslipper Music and the Human Rights Campaign Fund; and member-at-large of the Democratic National Committee, having served on both the DNC Black and Gay and Lesbian Caucuses.

She was an active member and former executive director of Southerners On New Ground. Carter also speaks on the issues of aging along with AARP. In 2008 Carter received the Anderson Prize Foundation’s Susan J. Hyde Longevity Award at the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force’s Conference. She was given the 2006 Spirit of Justice Award from Boston’s Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders for the significant and lasting impact she has had on the progress of LGBT civil rights in the U.S. Carter was also nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize as one of the “1000 Women for the Nobel Peace Prize 2005” which recognized and made visible the peace work of women around the world.

For more information, visit lgbtcenterofraleigh.com.

— L.M.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

Foundation hosts festival

WINSTON-SALEM — The Adam Foundation will hold its Adam Festival 2010, You oughta be in pictures!, on Oct. 23 at Milton Rhodes Center for the Arts, 226 N. Marshall St., at 7:30 p.m.

Attendees are encouraged to “dress to impress or come as you are — our red carpet is waiting for you!”

A silent auction, photo opportunities and keepsake items will be available.

Cost is $35/$15 students. Save $5 by registering online at adamfoundation.org.

Other activities which benefit the Foundation include a Martini Night on the second Wednesday of the month from 6-8 p.m. at 6th and Vine, 209 W. 6th St.; screenings with Out at the Movies; and Adam Night Out, which this month will be held at Sweet Potatoes, 529 N. Trade St. — L.M.

Triangle Author releases statement

RALEIGH — “Shades of Gay” author Stephanie Silberstein has released a personal statement in the aftermath of the recent suicides of five boys.

She states: “It’s easy to forget that words and statistics are not just words and statistics,” Silberstein wrote. “I personally believe that it’s possible for each of us to make things better…not necessarily for everyone, but at least for one person.”

She is encouraging her readers to create connections with someone in order to spread the word about available suicide prevention organizations. She suggests this can be done through a variety of ways, including writing, social action initiatives or providing entertainment.

Silberstein’s book was written as a response to D Gavi Chayim’s, her best friend, struggle with suicide in 2008. Chayim survived

this period and is now living as a transgender woman.

To read the entire statement, visit meowingatthemoon.wordpress. com/2010/09/30/about-the-recent-suicides.

— L.M.

Western ‘Angels’ in the mountains

ASHEVILLE — Tony Kushner’s Tony Award- and Pulitzer Prize-winning play, “Angels in America: Millennium Approaches,” has taken to the high country.

Performed by N.C. Stage Company at 15 Stage Ln., through Nov. 7, this often controversial presentation has been heralded as one of the most provocative productions of its time.

This piece is co-produced by Posana Cafe and Western North Carolina AIDS Project.

Mountain Xpress reported that the company’s cofounder and producing director, Angie Flynn-McIver, said, “Most of this play [involves] the most intimate scenes you can imagine between two people, and that’s what we do incredibly well.”

Across the nation theaters are revisiting this script during its 20th anniversary. FlynnMcIver continued, “We have been speaking of doing it for years and it just sort of started to feel that this was the time to do it.”

Tickets range from $16-$28, $10/students.

For more information, visit ncstage.org.

— L.M.

Advocacy Got cereal?

RALEIGH — Equality NC has been collecting boxes of Froot Loops to send to Rep. Larry Brown as a result of anti-gay slurs he used in an email to 60 House Republicans recently about the recipient of ENC Foundation’s Legislative Leadership Award recipient N.C. House Speaker Joe Hackney. Rep. Brown stated, “I hope all the queers are thrilled to see him. I am sure there will be a couple legislative fruitloops there in the audience.”

At press time they had hoped to get 400 boxes by Oct. 11 in recognition of National Coming Out Day.

Rep. Brown has not offered an apology to the LGBT community and allied constituents.

None of his 60 colleagues who received an email have spoken out against the bigoted language.

For every contribution in Rep. Brown’s name, a box of Froot Loops was slated to be delivered to his office along with personal messages. The contents were sent to Triad Health Project.

For more information, visit equalitync.org.

— L.M.

Campus Scene Training date set

CHARLOTTE — Campus Pride is holding its Stop The Hate Train The Trainer program from Dec. 6-9 at Holy Trinity Lutheran Church, 1900 The Plaza, from 8:30 a.m.-5:30 p.m. on Monday and Tuesday and 8:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. on Wednesday.

In the wake of the recent suicide deaths of five youth across the U.S., this training is timely and helps to foster development of the community with regard to preventing and combating bias and hate crimes at the college and university level. The program allows top administrators, student affairs professionals, faculty and students to learn new innovative tools to take action on hate crimes and biasmotivated violence issues on his/her campus.

The course was developed in partnership with the Anti-Defamation League, Association of College Unions International, Campus Pride, The Southern Poverty Law Center, Wilbron Institute, Matthew Shepard Foundation, Napa Valley College Criminal Justice Training Center and the Center for the Prevention of Hate Violence.

Early bird registration if paid by Nov. 6 is $395. Afterward costs increase to $495.

For more information, visit stophate.org.

— L.M.

Regional Prisons seek books

ASHEVILLE/CHAPEL HILL — The Asheville Prison Books Program and the International Prison Book Collective is gathering books to send to prisoners in the region and other states across the nation on LGBT issues.

Not only are they accepting these books, but they are looking for reading matter that may be helpful in elevating the educational level of prisoners who are seeking further academic accreditation.

The Prison Book Program is a national initiative that started in 1972. They supply reference books, as well as GED and other educational materials free of charge.

Categories also include, but are not limited to: health, psychology, self-improvement, social sciences, foreign language, ethnic studies, history, religious or spiritual studies, sports, hobbies and fiction.

Asheville accepts books for Georgia, North and South Carolina and Tennessee. Chapel Hill collect items for Alabama, Mississippi and some prisons in North Carolina.

To contribute, send paperback items to 67 N Lexington Ave., Asheville, NC 28801 or 405 W. Franklin St, Chapel Hill, NC 27516.

For more information on the program and its guidelines and other state’s projects, visit prisonbookprogram.org.

— L.M. info: Have news or other information? Send your press releases and updates for inclusion in our News Notes: editor@goqnotes.com.

National Court upholds lawsuit dismisssal

OHIO — In a unanimous decision, the Court of Appeals of Ohio, Eighth Appellate District, recently upheld a lower court’s dismissal of a lawsuit brought by the anti-gay Alliance Defense Fund that attempted to strip away the newly enacted domestic partnership registry for same-sex couples and their families. Last year, the Cleveland City Council voted to create a registry for same-sex couples. The ADF filed a lawsuit against the city arguing that the domestic partnership registry is a violation of the state’s 2004 constitutional amendment barring marriage equality for same-sex couples.

— D.S.

Immigration reform act introduced

WASHINGTON, D.C. — On Sept. 30, Senators Robert Menendez (D-NJ) and Patrick Leahy (D-VT) introduced the Comprehensive Immigration Reform Act of 2010. This legislation, which provides many urgently needed changes to our national immigration law, protects same-sex couples by incorporating the substance of the Uniting Americans Families Act (UAFA), which would grant U.S. citizens and lawful permanent residents the right to sponsor their same-sex permanent partners to immigrate to the U.S. — D.S.

Pearson named top teacher

OMAHA — GLSEN, the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, has selected Omaha, Neb., teacher Ferial Pearson as the 2010 GLSEN Educator of the Year. Pearson, who was chosen out of nearly 100 nominations, is an English teacher at Omaha South High School and has served as the school’s Gay-Straight Alliance advisor since her first year teaching nine years ago, despite opposition from within the school community including several threats of lawsuits. She has helped grow her school’s GSA from one stu-

dent to one of the country’s largest with 150 students. She also helped start Omaha’s Pride Prom, which has grown from 75 students five years ago to more than 300 this year from all across the state. Pearson moved to the U.S. from Kenya at 19.

— D.S.

Report spotlights trans athletes

CALIFORNIA/NEW YORK — A groundbreaking report sponsored by the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) and It Takes A Team!, an Initiative of the Women’s Sports Foundation, is urging high school and college athletic associations across the country to adopt standard policies to provide transgender student athletes fair and equal opportunity to participate on athletic teams.

The report, “On the Team: Equal Opportunities for Transgender Student Athletes,” is the first ever to thoroughly address the complete integration of transgender student athletes within high school and collegiate athletic programs.

The report is also the first to provide comprehensive model policies and a framework for athletic leaders to ensure equal access to school athletics for transgender students.

— D.S.

Global Mag promotes anti-gay violence

UGANDA —A two-month-old tabloid in Uganda called “Rolling Stone” (no relation to the U.S.-based publication) has turned to gaybaiting to grow circulation. As part of an early October cover-story, the magazine published photos of 11 Ugandan men it claims are gay accompanied by the phrase “Hang them.”

The pictures appear to have been downloaded from Facebook profiles. Given the virulently anti-gay climate in Uganda, the magazine’s campaign could equal a death sentence for some of the pictured. Despite an outcry from international gay and human rights groups, “Rolling Stone” editors have vowed to publish more photos in forthcoming issues.

— D.S.

BUSINESS

Americans support workplace equality NEW YORK, N.Y. — According to the 2010 Out & Equal Workplace Survey, 78 percent of heterosexual adults agree that how an employee performs at his or her job should be the standard for judging an employee, not their sexual orientation.

Three out of five (62 percent) heterosexual adults agree that regardless of their sexual orientation, all employees are entitled to equal benefits, such as health insurance for their partners or spouses.

Many heterosexual adults believe their LGBT colleagues deserve fairness and equality in the workplace. For example, when also asked about different workplace benefits offered to spouses of married heterosexual employees compared to committed partners of LGBT employees, 74 percent of heterosexuals think both spouses and partners should receive family leave to deal with the loss of a spouse/partner or close family member.

Seven out of 10 heterosexual adults also think both spouses and partners should receive leave rights for family and

medical emergencies as outlined in the Family and Medical Leave Act. A majority of heterosexuals (63 percent) also think both spouses and partners should receive untaxed health insurance benefits.

The 2010 Out & Equal Workplace Survey was conducted online by Harris Interactive in conjunction with Out & Equal Workplace Advocates and Witeck-Combs Communications. A total of 2,775 U.S. adults — of whom 2,334 indicated they are heterosexual and 386 self-identified as LGBT — participated.

The Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA), which would prohibit discrimination against employees on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity, is still working its way through the United States Congress since its introduction in 1994.

The survey showed an education gap among adults about ENDA and how current law touches the lives of many LGBT Americans. Sixty-two percent of heterosexual adults did not know that under current federal law it is legal for an employer to fire someone because they are LGBT. Almost half (47 percent) of LGBT adults also did not know.

— D.S.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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NEWS

Know your risk, doctor tells women Breast, other cancers better treated when detected early

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Photo Credit: Kira Westland, via Flickr. Licensed under Creative Commons.

Theresa Knight, an obstetrician and gynecologist in St. Louis, Miss., says the best thing women can do to protect their health is know their risk. That’s especially true for lesbian women, she says, who are at a greater risk for both breast cancer and ovarian cancer.

“There are a couple of reasons for that,” Knight says. “One of the risks is if a women has not had children by menopause. Not having children and having a prolonged reproductive life increases the risk.”

But, the biggest risk is often societal.

“Lesbians, in general, have felt like they have been pushed out of the mainstream and sidelined,” Knight says of anti-LGBT prejudice. “For that reason, many lesbians are not very trusting of mainstream society and doctors are seen as very much mainstream. They aren’t willing to go and get regular check-ups or to follow through on some of the more mainstream recommendations because they feel like they’ve not been allowed to be in society.”

Other risks are genetic. Those often target both men and women equally, she says.

“Gene mutations that increase risk for cancer are equally present in both men and women,” she says. “Though a woman may have a gene mutation that increases her risk for breast cancer, her brothers or her sons have an equal risk of carrying that gene mutation; there is a 60 percent chance that those genes will be passed down.”

Male risks include colon and the early on-

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set of prostate cancer. For women, carrying gene mutations can be the cause of breast cancer and others affecting the uterine, ovaries and colon.

Over the past couple decades, awareness of cancer risk — especially breast cancer, for women — has become more commonplace.

Part of the new awareness of cancer stems from researchers’ new discoveries of genetic and heritable risk. Knight says cancer was once thought to be a sign of longevity — that if a person lived long enough then cancer would become the leading cause of death.

“Because of that, people didn’t start looking for cancer until they got into their 50s,” she says. “We’ve discovered that people who get cancer in early age are people who have those genetic risks, whose immune systems don’t recognize these abnormal cancer cells and don’t eliminate them so they have a chance to take hold and grow.”

Familial history, Knight says, is often a good indicator of risk. She says women, as well as men, should discuss these issues and their family members’ medical histories with their doctors and other health providers.

“The most important thing is to be welleducated and empowered and never to think that ignorance is bliss,” she says. “Early detection of breast cancer means that it doesn’t have to be a death sentence. It is very survivable.” : :

t-notes by robbi cohn :: qnotes contributor

Day of Remembrance: Violence vis a vis murder By a very rough estimate, since January I’ve counted 19 instances of hate crimes perpetrated against trans individuals resulting in death, worldwide. These are the lives we recall and commemorate each year on Nov. 20, the annual Trans Day of Remembrance.

These are the lives that have been tragically snuffed out prematurely because of hate and fear and ignorance.

I’m confident that it’s never our intent to underestimate the effect that trans violence in general has upon its victims, but I rarely see references to nonfatal instances in the press much after a week from their occurrence has passed. Of course, losing one’s life is the ultimate consequence in hate related crime, but violence directed at trans persons is not only pervasive but goes mostly unreported. And, in most instances, attacks do not result in fatality. It could easily happen to someone you know…it could happen to you.

Maybe I’m a little sensitive after having had someone run through the parking lot at a Furthur concert screaming “that’s not a real woman…that’s a man,” but I suspect that recently enacted hate crime legislation will fall short in curtailing hate motivated violence. What is most needed is a paradigmatic shift in how we, as a society, frame and comprehend diversity and that doesn’t appear to be imminent. Until the day when transphobia has been all but exterminated, we must maintain vigilance. If we go through life unaware of potential dangers, we are more easily made prey. This isn’t to say that we need to give into the kind of fear these transphobes thrive on…just the opposite.

Our refusal to give into their campaign of fear gives us power.

Our best chance at reducing and eventually, maybe, eliminating this needless and pathological bigotry is to expose these persons and their behaviors for what they really are. They need to be held up to the light of day, exposed as bigots with personal issues they have foisted upon the rest of the world.

And, we need to be sure that everyone is watching.

Cited instances of trans violence have been reported all over the world, but most I’ve recorded happened in the United States.

Of the nearly 20 instances I found covered by news agencies worldwide, 15 occurred in the U.S. This disproportion is most likely due to the fact that more transphobic crime goes unreported outside of this country. It’s more likely than not that at least three quarters of this kind of domestic hate crime doesn’t see the light of day… there’s no telling how much isn’t reported worldwide. Needless to say, it should give us pause.

Okay…let’s look at several of these domestic instances which have transpired over the past 10 months. All paint pictures colored buy ignorance, hate and fear. All were senseless and brutal. None are comprehen-

sible. And, press coverage has been scant.

In January of this year, an Athens, Ga., trans teen was assaulted by a would-be rapist who kicked her repeatedly upon discovering, after pulling her pants down, that she was anatomically not what he had thought.

And, in April, Colle Carpenter was attacked on the Cal State Long Beach campus, dragged into a bathroom where the assailant carved “it” on her chest with a knife. The perpetrator has not been found.

Washington, D.C. made the news three times. This past March, a transwoman was shot in the leg by an unknown assailant. In June, two transwomen were attacked with a pole. A suspect was arrested and charged with Assault with a Dangerous Weapon/Pole (Bias Related). In August, another transwoman was attacked in Dupont Cir., N.W. Even though I have found only three citations describing DC incidents, the report from this last attack states that there had been seven instances of violence against transpersons in northwest DC alone to date this year.

Another attack in June occurred in Seattle, Wash., where a trans woman was kicked in the neck and punched in the face by a violent transphobe. This same man had been arrested and convicted previously for hate related crime. Add to these incidents reported in Baltimore, Md., Gainesville, Fla., Alexandria, La., San Antonio, Texas…as well as in San Francisco, Calif. , Wilmington, N.C. and elsewhere. Add to that total the incalculable number of attacks that went unreported by the victims and/or unreported by the police and press. We have no way of knowing just how high that number really is!

Then there’s bullying…non violent but effective for inflicting harm upon its victims.

In the wake of recent and tragic suicides, it must be apparent that violence…physical and/or psychological…directed towards people who are different…trans persons, for example…may very well be the trigger that pushes some individuals to take their lives.

As much as the tragedy of fatal attacks demands our attention on the Day of Remembrance, perhaps this year we can take a moment to commemorate and remember lives which may have not been taken, but which have ended, or which have been all but destroyed, by hate mongers. These bigots who have chosen to ruin others’ lives are out there and must be stopped. If it hasn’t been obvious before to the nation at large, it certainly is becoming so now….or should be!

Don’t let these haters hide in the shadows…expose them for who they are…express your outrage…and not just on the Day of Remembrance, but that’s a start! : : — Comments and corrections can be sent to editor@goqnotes.com.

To contact Robbi Cohn, email robbi_cohn108@yahoo.com.

want more opinion & commentary visit goqnotes.com/to/blog for daily insights, rants, raves and news tidbits from qnotes staff and local and national voices from around the web.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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Tomlin takes Charlotte Comedian heads to Queen City for Oct. 24 show

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Famed comedian and actor Lily Tomlin heads to Charlotte on Oct. 24, performing at Blumenthal’s Belk Theater. She was kind enough to give qnotes a few minutes of her time. We got some of her thoughts on her upcoming show, Hollywood and entertainment culture and reality TV, along with her thoughts on the recent reports of gay teen suicides across the nation.

Have you ever been to Charlotte before?

Oh, god yes. I have friends who live in Rock Hill and friends in Greensboro, so I pass through there a lot. I played Charlotte fairly recently — in the past five years at least.

Tell us a bit about your show on Oct. 24. What can folks expect?

My show is a lot of fooling around, talking to the audience, trying to talk about Charlotte and the world a little bit and to do that in both my voice and the voices of some characters. I sometimes show clips but they are all integrated into the show.

So, it is a multimedia show?

Yes. I’ve never thought to say that. That would sound good. I should say that more often: Multimedia elements.

What kind of elements might show up?

Miss Beasley might make an appearance and

might show or talk about something she’s done in the past that might illustrate her responsibility to the culture (laughs). These characters are so real to me, it’s funny to think their egos allow them to take a position when it is all really self-imposed.

Of course, I also want to take one left turn after another so you don’t really know where I’m going.

That keeps the audience on their feet and laughing, right?

Well, I hope so (laughs). It’ll certainly keep them entertained.

Other than your show, you’ve had a lot of other great things going on. Are you still planning on a spinoff to “Desperate Housewives”?

Kathy [Joosten (who plays Karen McCluskey)] and I are still working on that. We would play sisters as we did on “Desperate Housewives” and it would take a detective-like plot — “detective” simply because we stick our noses in everything.

I’ve been a personal fan of yours forever and I’ve always been astonished at all you’ve been able to do and the variety of characters you’ve been able to play in different situations and genres.

You can do “Desperate Housewives” just as well as “The West Wing.”

I also did a season of “Damages” recently and got nominated for an Emmy for best dramatic performance.

How is that you are able to play so wide an array of characters? Tell us a bit about that process of making the character?

It’s really just another tangent of acting and a degree of more comedic or less comedic and what the vehicle and the style calls for. Marty Short was also on “Damages” last season. I played a Ruth Madoff kind of character, Meredith Tobin, and Marty played our family lawyer. It was a very serious part. People ask people like Marty and me questions like this commonly and a lot of other comedy actors say the same thing. Really, though, acting is all the same and it is just what is called for at the time.

You’ve been involved in the entertainment business for a long time now. You’ve got a long career behind you and certainly a long one still before you. In your years of involvement, what have you seen change?

There have been a lot of barriers broken and knocked down, specifically the language barrier. Oh, and the reality television. Reality TV has been fairly profound in terms of displacing certain scripted shows and that kind of entertainment creation.

But, just as in the entire culture, certain barriers have been eliminated, at least for the time being. I don’t know if the country will take a swing in another direction and become much more censored or limiting but one never knows.

Do you think reality television, that whole phenomenon, has been good for the entertainment world and entertainment culture in America or do you think maybe it has caused some damage to our collective

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creative forces? (laughs) It certainly has created fewer jobs for actors and certain kinds of writers — not that reality television isn’t something that’s not written, generally speaking. You get these real people and encourage as much outrageous behavior in them as you can, I suppose, like “Jerry Springer.” It’s all unfortunate. In so many ways you can bring out the most disgusting, most base part of humanity. But, it is there. So, I guess we have to deal with that.

Would you ever star in a reality TV series?

I think it would depend on the intention. Certainly, if it is satirical. I created a series for myself about 10 years ago which was kind of a hybrid, not entirely reality. I was going to have a set built like my house and everyone in the show, except me, would wear spy cams including the dogs and cats and everyone (laughs). Then you could theoretically cut in footage from real life into stuff that was scripted or staged because it’d be shot in a similar environment. But, it was all more satirical than reality — making fun of celebrity and of the idea that anything we do in our lives is really all that interesting.

Do you dance?

Yeah. Well enough.

Oh, you could do “Dancing With The Stars”!

Oh, yeah. Sure (laughs). I think I might have been asked to do that actually. Or, maybe I just dreamed that (laughs).

As a comedian and actor you’ve never been afraid to be outspoken. You’ve been involved certainly on gay rights issues. As someone involved in the media world, what are your thoughts on the recent string of gay teen suicides and Dan Savage’s “It Gets Better” YouTube campaign?

Well, nothing is worse than high school — although Tyler, the Rutgers student, was in college.

But, in terms of peer pressure and ostracizing and the ridiculing and making you feel completely unworthy — all this mean-spirited philosophy of them against us is so repulsive. It’s repulsive that people would lack so much empathy for another person. I think “It Gets Better” is a perfect title for this grassroots series Dan is doing. I think it is wonderful and I even hope I can tape something for him because it does get better. People’s lives change after high school. You go off and make your own life. I live in a big city now and grew up in one, but my family was from Kentucky so I know what kids have gone through over the past 30 to 50 years. That these young kids saw suicide as their only way out — it is so heartbreaking. If only I could have gotten a hold of them.

Do you think Hollywood and entertainment, other than serving its basic entertainment purposes, sometimes acts as a lifeline, too?

Sure. There’s a lot of stuff that’s been expanded upon and accepted. Although there are still pockets where there is so much prejudice and hate. I saw my kid brother, who is gay, go through some terrible situations when we were growing up. But, we’re both grown now. I know it is much better but it certainly is not perfect. : :

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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out in the stars by charlene lichtenstein :: qnotes contributor

October 16 - 29

CONTEST!

Fleeting and flighty Mercury gracefully transits three signs this month — Virgo, Libra and Scorpio. Let’s keep ourselves open to fresh ideas as new information comes forward. How often can we change our minds? For some, more than we change our underwear.

LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Get out of your rut, proud Libra, and see how far your great ideas can take you. Some of the folks you have just met can help you get to the next level in whatever you need. So concentrate on what you need — funding, contacts, moral support — and continue forward. Of course, if you are plotting world domination, you may want to keep a few ideas to yourself for now.

SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) Life has been a whirlwind of ups and downs, intrigues and partnerships.

Take a breath, proud Scorp. Consolidate all your disparate information and let your world and its path to success take shape.You will be amazed at how easily things will go now that you have put in all the work. Meet and greet in new circles and expect to meet on-the-square individuals.

SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) If you find yourself less inclined to fight the corporate machine and wrestle with the pinstriped sharks, why not give yourself a much needed break from all the action? Gay Archers will have plenty of time to navigate the waters later. For now, I recommend mellow, stress-reducing activities such as meditation, yoga or deep tissue massage.

Anyone we know?

CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Getting back to earth after your mind-expanding international jaunts will be hard to do, but do it. This time period requires focus and and strategy. Pink Caps will find that friends will be pivotal to their success. Have you been as sociable as you need to be? Start today by planning some get-togethers with those who know and love you. How hard is that to do?

AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) Now that you have expended all your excess energy on fun, frolic and vacation, it is time to get back to work.

Aqueerians may experience a hard landing in the real world, but the sooner you readjust, the better for your long-term plans. Life is more than a walk on the beach. And, even on the beach, the sand can be too hot. Gird your loins and prepare for the politics.

PISCES (02.20-03.20) Guppies can be swept off their feet by just another pretty face. And, why not? You are in love with love and love loves back. Well, at least for right now. Enjoy your thrills while they last, but don’t give up more than a few delicious compliments. Make no promises. Too, too soon, your mind will move

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on to more grounded ideas. Don’t get tied down while you are tied up.

ARIES (03.21-04.20) Do you see a deity as you gaze at yourself in the mirror? Yes, all that buffing and toning has paid off. Direct your gaze to partnerships — whether cementing the current one or finding a new one. Things can heat up quickly, going from cool gaze to boiling passion.

Plan things out in your head before you bite off more than you can chew. Or, is that the plan?

TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Your joi de vivre might have gotten the best of you — partying until the cows come home and then having to wake up at dawn to do the milking. But, if you can concentrate on the job at hand, you can accomplish more than you think in a short amount of time. And, that will leave you plenty of time to kanoodle with you-know-who. Whoo hoo!

GEMINI (05.22-06.21) If you have spent your time attending to home and family entertainment, you can now turn your attention to your job. Focus on what needs to get done by the end of the year and see if you can discover creative solutions to longtime challenges. Pink Twins become attuned to the needs of others at this time. Use it to your advantage to grab that corner cubicle.

CANCER (06.22-07.23) Little did you know when you first reassessed your home life that the plans for change could go so well. Whether it had to do with family outreach or a long-deferred renovation or even a complete move, your new personal environment is more in sync with who you really are. Mistakes could have been made, however.

Take that plastic orange ottoman for example.

LEO (07.24-08.23) Put your money where your mouth is, proud Lion. Things are now primed for changes of your own making. You have successfully wheeled and dealed your way through the past few weeks, amassing fortune, knowledge and moxie. Now, you must take stock, review the situation, collect your thoughts and get ready to make your move. Stand back world or get flattened.

VIRGO (08.24-09.23) This is a highly personal time for you, queer Virgin, where your prior value system may not measure up to your current lifestyle. But, this is not a bad thing. Your mind warp is part of your evolution and will serve you well as you begin new phases of your life over the next few months. Remember, all that glitters is not gold. What do they say about kids and shiny objects? : : © 2010 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.

Southern Christmas Show, for FREE!

Register for your chance to win a free ticket package to this year’s Southern Christmas Show, Nov. 11-21 at the Park Expo and Conference Center. Five winners will be chosen to receive a package of four entry tickets (a $36 value). Just complete the form below and mail to: QNotes. PO Box 221841. Charlotte, NC 28205.

______________________________________________________ name: ______________________________________________________ address: ______________________________________________________ city: state: zip: ______________________________________________________ phone ______________________________________________________ email address ______________________________________________________

All entries must be received via U.S. Postal Service and postmarked no later than Nov. 1, 2010.

Entries received after Nov. 2, 2010 will not be considered valid. One entry per household.

Oct. 16-29 . 2010

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and confusion the song’s protagonist must face and defeat as she navigates the murky waters toward adulthood.

“We want our songs to bring people to that magical place that we’re trying to get to ourselves,” Sunde says.

Overcoming obstacles — both the kind that are imposed on us and the sort we impose on ourselves — is another recurring theme on the album. It’s also something Sunde and Bevan aspire to in real life, through The Green Children Foundation, established in 2005.

The foundation supports causes including empowering women in the developing world, environmental initiatives and fostering programs to make the world a better place, such as a children’s eye clinic in Bangladesh that bears their name.

“We want to use our voice for a bigger purpose. Having our music help others is a natural progression,” says Sunde.

Key three: “Dragons,” “Hear Me Now,” “Tell Me” : : info: audiophile@goqnotes.com

MUSIC

a range of musical forms and influences.

“We have both traveled quite a lot since we by david stout :: david@goqnotes.com were very young, and are fans of many different kinds of music,” says Bevan. “Our songs come Green Children play and sing from the heart and the spirit. Sometimes it feels The debut release from like we almost channel things that have hapEuropean duo The Green Children pened along the way. We don’t have any rules about making is out now and I’ve been playing music.” it on repeat since it arrived. I’m a Along with their itinersucker for atmospheric dreamant spirits, Sunde and Bevan pop when it’s done right and share a love of enchanted “Encounter” is the gauzy goods. legends, myths and the natural The 12-track set avoids the wonders of the world, taking annoying mope that often weighs inspiration from their charmed down ethereal pop releases. The birthplaces. The duo’s name lyrics are evocative and the mood is restrained, to be sure, but comes from a medieval British the songs appreciably steer clear of dour. Instead, the focus tale and their music, which has is kept on Norway native Milla Sunde’s crystalline voice as it been described as “cinematic glides across British instrumentalist Marlow Bevan’s canny fantasy pop,” is infused with blend of trip-hop, electronica and acoustic pop. folklore and magic.

Sunde and Bevan met while attending the Liverpool For example, on “Dragons,” Institute for the Performing Arts, an English university cothe electro-pop first single from founded by Sir Paul McCartney. Both lived (self-described) “Encounter,” an illusory firenomadic lifestyles before landing there, which opened them to breather represents the doubt

audiophile

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tell trinity by trinity :: qnotes contributor

Dealing with ‘the silent treatment’ Dearest Trinity, My partner often shows displeasure with me by closing off all communication for a few days with the “silent treatment.” But, then I feel horrible and abused. Any help would be appreciated!

Closed Off, San Diego, CA Dearest Closed Off, Don’t you just hate that? It’s so unclear and wastes so much time. Lets try this, honey. When you’re both getting along suggest a game for the times when “we’re” not getting along. In this game, “I give three words describing how I feel and you do the same.” This way your partner gets to practice letting it out and you get to wonder… if being single wouldn’t be easier!

But, darling, just like relationships need rules, so do open relationships — like, no falling in love, no unsafe sex, no bringing someone home and no sleeping out all night, otherwise you could end up in very dangerous water (beds). (Let my cartoon ditty show you some insight about this issue.)

Hey Girl, I met someone Friday night and spent the weekend with him.

Three days later he wants me to meet his friends and family. It’s so fast. Should I say, “Wait a while?”

Hurry Date, Albany, N.Y. Hey Hurry Date, Meeting “the friends and family” of someone you just met is absolutely fast and sometimes a sign that he or she may lose interest equally as fast. However, pumpkin, some people know what they want right away and if you feel good about this person, then what the hell, why not meet your future relatives or ex-relatives early? Ask to be introduced as a friend to make things lighter. Remember, dating is a “game” to be played not stored on the shelf!

Dear Trinity, My four-year relationship needs a sex overhaul or we won’t make it to year five. I am thinking of an open relationship. What do you think?

Open Season, Raleigh, NC

Hello Trinity, After two years, my girlfriend dumped me to go back to school.

Now, I can’t get over her and everything we had. Any suggestions on getting her out of my mind?

Loosing My Mind, New York, N.Y.

Dear Open Season, I think it’s smart to try anything and everything to make a relationship work sexually before throwing in the hand towel.

Hello Loosing My Mind, Before you get suicidal, sweetie, mix yourself a martini (or milkshake) and start reading:

Trinity’s Sane Tips For What It’s Time To Stop Doing After You’ve Just Broken Up 1. It’s time to stop watching home videos of the two of “us” and start “washing that (wo)man right out of your head!”

2. It’s time to stop daydreaming about what you could have done differently and start thinking about what you will do differently now that you’re free.

3. It’s time to stop calling her friends to see if she’s still single and start making new friends who will keep you dating!

4. It’s time to stop thinking about revenge and start thinking about Saturday night rendezvous.

5. It’s time to stop accidentally passing by his workplace and start purposely passing by new places with new people to meet.

6. It’s time to stop cooking the same meals she loved and start trying new recipes for you and your new dates.

7. It’s time to stop looking the way he always liked you to look and start your new life with a fabulous makeover (seriously)!

8. It’s time to stop playing the answering machine just to hear her voice one more time. For God sakes, erase the machine already!

9. It’s time to stop listening to “our” favorite songs and start listening to upbeat songs like, “I Will Survive,” “I’m A Survivor” and “No More Drama!”

10. And, lastly, it’s time to stop living with him, paying his bills and feeding his dog and start moving out as soon as possible, please! : : — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally. info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com Tell Trinity, P.O. Box 23861 . Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33307 Sponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild 800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org

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OUTSpoken at UNC-Charlotte: Brian K. Sims

Oct. 27 • Charlotte The University of North Carolina-Charlotte’s OUTSpoken speakers series presents Brian K. Sims, the nation’s only openly gay football team captain in NCAA history. Now a lawyer who works with several LGBT organizations, Sims has a unique perspective on youth, college and athletic life and politics. McKnight Hall Cone University Center, 9201 University City Blvd. 7 p.m.-9 p.m. Free. outspoken.uncc.edu.

Oct. 17 • Charlotte Bullied Until Broken Crossroads Charlotte, Time Out Youth and Temple Beth El partner to present a special panel discussion, “Bullied Until Broken: The impact of bullying on LGBT youth in CharlotteMecklenburg and Community Responses.”

Jewish Community Center, 5007 Providence Rd. 4 p.m.-5:30 p.m. Free. crossroadscharlotte.org.

Oct. 17 • Durham TASA Fall Tourney Triangle Area Softball Association (TASA) wraps up their fall season with a special tournament. Awards party at Steel Blue follows.

Valley Springs Park, 3805 Valley Springs Rd. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. trianglesoftball.com.

Oct. 17 • Raleigh Wine tasting The LGBT Center of Raleigh will hold a private wine tasting to benefit OutRaleigh, a spring festival of the Center. Café Caturra, 432 Woodburn Rd. 3-5 p.m. Visit lgbtcenter ofraleigh.com for more information and to register.

Oct. 20 • Charlotte CBG at the Movies Charlotte Business Guild member Jud Gee hosts and sponsors a special, private screening of “The Blind Side” at Van Landingham Estate, 2010 The Plaza, 6-8 p.m. Reservations are required and the event is limited to members and one guest. For more information or to reserve tickets, call 704-565-5075 or email businessguild@yahoo.com.

Oct. 20 • Columbia It Gets Better SC Pride and other groups host a special vigil to support LGBT youth and end bullying. Speakers include Harriet Hancock, Tony

Snell, Rev. Tom Summers, Ed Madden, Elke Kennedy, Dr. Todd Shaw and Justin Wise.

Music by Elaine Townsend with readings from “OUTLOUD: The Best of Rainbow Radio.”

South Carolina State House, Main and Gervais Sts. 7:30-9 p.m. scpride.org.

Oct. 22 • Charlotte Let Love Reign Photographers bring their special exhibit on same-sex love and marriage equality awareness to Charlotte. The “Let Love Reign” exhibit will run at the Gil Gallery beginning with a special Oct. 22 opening reception, 6-9 p.m. and continues through Oct. 30. The Gil Gallery, 109 W. Morehead St., is open for public viewing Monday-Friday 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Saturdays 10 a.m.-2 p.m. For more information, visit letlovereign.org.

Oct. 22 • Charlotte Fat Camp! Release Party Fat Camp!, billed as “North Carolinas premier homosexual party rock band” and recently featured as qnotes cover story, hosts their 7-inch release party. Also on the night’s gay indie-rocking line-up is Buck Mtn Stranglers, Say Brother, Pinko and Totally Jeremy. The Milestone, 3400 Tuckaseegee Rd. 9 p.m.-1 a.m. fatcampband.blogspot.com.

Oct. 22 • Winston-Salem ‘Bullied’ Continuing their LGBT film series, OUT at the Movies screens “Bullied,” a film featuring Jamie Nabozny, a teen who was tormented by classmates for years. UNCSA, ACE Theatre Complex, 1533 S. Main St. 7 p.m.-8:30 p.m. outatthemovieswinston.org.

Oct. 23 • Charlotte Please Stand By Charlotte Pride Band presents “Please Stand By,” a collection of fun and memorable

we want your who/what/where

music from the television medium. Unitarian Universalist Church of Charlotte, 234 Sharon Amity Rd. 8 p.m. $10. charlotteprideband.org.

Oct. 26 • Wilmington Turning out the LGBT vote Equality North Carolina joins the UNCWilmington LGBTQI Office for a discussion about LGBT issues in the state and the importance of getting out the LGBT vote in November. UNC-Wilmington, 601 S. College St. More details at equalitync.org.

Oct. 30 • Charlotte Nodaween The NoDa Neighborhood Association presents the NoDa Halloween Festival including the Freaky 5k Twilight Race, Pimp My Pumpkin Fine Art Auction and “Rocky Horror Picture Show” Viewing Party. 5 p.m.- 2 a.m. Get more information and event details at nodaween.com.

Oct. 30 • Charlotte Glitterati Ball This year’s Glitterati Ball takes on Zombieland.

Come dressed in costume for your chance to win $1,000. Presented by J Studio, Just Twirl and My Townhome. Visulite Theatre, 1615 Elizabeth Ave. 9 p.m.-2:30 p.m. Tickets available at glitteratiball.com/tickets/zombieland.

Oct. 30 • Greensboro GGF Halloween The Guilford Green Foundation hosts a spooky night of fun hosted by Big Shirli Stevenz.

Costume prizes and more. Space is limited. Q Lounge, 708 W. Market St. $25 in advance at ggfnc.org/events.html. $30 at the door.

Oct. 31 • Charlotte Halloween Benefit Join this benefit for Susan G. Komen For the Cure and party the Halloween night away.

Live entertainment, appetizers, open bar and

Q

events qnotes goqnotes.com/qguide/events

arts. entertainment. news. views. dessert lounge. The Palisades of Lake Wylie, 1374 Grand Palisades Pkwy. 8 p.m.-2 a.m. social2benefit.org.

Nov. 2 • Statewide Election Day Don’t forget to head out to your polling place and vote in this year’s midterm elections.

Several races are on the ballot including state judicial offices, state House and Senate seats, U.S. House seats and various city and county offices across the state. To learn more and to check your voter registration and polling place, visit www.sboe.state.nc.us.

Nov. 4 • Raleigh OutRaleigh: Priscilla Join the LGBT Center of Raleigh for a special screening of “Priscilla Queen of the Desert” with drag performances. Tickets cost only $10.

Beer and wine available at concessions. For more information, visit lgbtcenterofraleigh.org or email outraleigh@lgbtcenterofraleigh.com.

Nov. 12 • Charlotte Glee BINGO RAIN and Shelita Hamm present their farewell Gay Bingo in the Queen City. Grady Cole Center, 310 N. Kings Dr. 6:30 p.m. gaybingocharlotte.org.

Nov. 13 • Greensboro ENC Conference and Gala Mark your calendars now for the fourth annual Equality North Carolina Conference and Gala, hosted again this year at the University of North Carolina-Greensboro. For more details as they become available or to register or sponsor, visit equalitync.org/conference.

Submitting an event for inclusion in our calendar has never been easier: visit goqnotes.com/qguide/events/submit

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