Rachel Bluth

"Now Rachel is a different sort of bird. No peacock, but a parrot to be heard! Red cheeks denoting beauty and good health, Of anecdotes she had a funny wealth. She lived off our attention like a child, And if ignored, she was prone to go wild. Born of a family that spoke their minds She ran a paper, viewpoints there to find. She danced and pranced and laughed and rolled and sang. Appearance jokes, however, always stang. If hair was mentioned, or her dear sports bra, Her heart was pierced, but victim she was not. She’d pounce and sit on whoever had spake And hold them there until they cried, 'I’ll break!'" ~Nathaniel Edgar