Rapport 9 - Autumn 2007 by ANLP International CIC

ISSUE NINE

AUTUMN 2007

Getrude Matshe Motivational speaker & inspirational entrepreneur

Presuppositions of NLP Expanding the parameters of possibility

EFT

Working with cravings

Michael Grinder

Lessons in the power of inďŹ&#x201A;uence

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contents

autumn 2007

Regulars

4 FEEDBACK 6 DEBATE

NLP as seen on TV

Welcome to the Autumn Issue

of Rapport. I love the ideas that underpin “The Secret”. On page 32, Dr John Demartini says “Doing what you love and loving what you do is great for you” which means, as the publisher of Rapport, I am one of the luckiest people in the world. Michael Spence talks about expanding the parameters of possibility, by reminding us about the presuppositions of NLP (p14). I love his new deﬁnition of NLP- “No Limits People- those who keep going to fulﬁl their dreams, whatever happens”. I’ll certainly be reminding myself of that over the next few months as I am moving house tomorrow... well, moving into a caravan on a plot of grass, upon which we will build “our dream home” over the next 12 months! I’m future pacing this one and focusing on Christmas 2008, visualising my family round the Christmas Tree in our newly completed home! And what better role model for visualisation techniques than Getrude Matshe, African storyteller, motivational speaker and truly inspirational entrepreneur, whose story we tell on p22. With most of my wardrobe disappearing into storage for the next few months, I’ve given plenty of thought to Julia Rennie’s advice on image (Forty seconds to success, p34). It is so important to remember that we are always creating a visual impression with others, regardless of whether we actually say anything. Talking of image, David Lincoln writes a short piece to explain the thinking and philosophy behind ANLP Trainers Accreditation. Do read Shona’s 7 Strategies to boost your business (p24). I have picked up some really useful tips for our own marketing plan. Watch this space... Wishing you well...

Karen Moxom

8 WHAT’S NEW The latest news

12 NLP NEWS

What’s happening in the NLP community

30 PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT

Why should I be an Accredited Trainer with ANLP?

40 DIARY

Events taking place over the next 3 months

43 BOOK REVIEWS

The latest books reviewed by our panel

44 AUTHOR INTERVIEW

Hannah McNamara

46 PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT Publishing: A Dangerous Business

48 REGIONAL GROUPS

Manchester Business NLP

50 ENDNOTE

Trust me, I’m a coach

Features 10 NLP

Michael Grinder and Lessons in the Power of Inﬂuence

14 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Expanding the parameters of possibility

Cover stories 18 EDUCATION

26 HEALTH

Teaching with a skills focus

EFT and cravings

20 INTERNATIONAL

32 NLP APPLICATIONS

A ﬂash of lightning in the east

22 CELEBRITY Getrude Matshe on visualisation

24 PROFESSIONAL 7 Strategies to Boost Your Business

Editorial Team: Caitlin Collins, Andy Coote, Eve Menezes Cunningham, Mandy Smith Team@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1162 Art Editor: Enzo Zanelli Advertising: David Hammond david@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1189 Membership, subscriptions and back issues: Lala Ali Khan Members@anlp.org, 0845 053 1162

Publisher: Karen Moxom karen@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1162 Company Reg No. 05390486 Phoenix Publishing Ltd PO Box 3357, EN5 9AJ Rapport published by Phoenix Publishing on behalf of ANLP. Printed in the UK Design: Square Eye Design

More Secrets from Bob Procter and Dr John Demartini

34 BUSINESS

Forty seconds to success

38 TRAINING PPD Learning

DISCLAIMER The views within this magazine are not necessarily those of the publisher, nor does the publisher endorse the products or services promoted in the magazine. Articles are for information only and intent is to inform. Readers should seek professional advice before adopting any suggestions or purchasing any products herein.

rapport - Autumn 2007

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FEEDBACK

Send your feedback to: The Editor, Rapport Magazine, PO Box 3357, Barnet, EN5 9AJ or email letters@rapportmag.com

Dear Rapport “Just a brief note to thank all of you at Rapport for your generosity. I am a US Master Practitioner and have heard such nice things about your publication. I took advantage of your offer to download the Summer edition and now I can see why people speak so highly of the quality content and elegant presentation. I am now a subscriber. The PDF edition is a real bargain for those of us ‘across the pond’. Thanks again for modeling real quality in what you do.” Mike Bown

Dear Rapport I have ﬁnally got all my ANLP Application stuff in the post today. I am so very busy just now. My recording studio is booked solid for next 10 weeks. Using NLP techniques and philosophies I have doubled my income so far this year. I will better that next year. I’m doing gigs in Aug and Sept with country star Daniel O’Donnell’s sister Margo and there is so much to do - Writing parts, rehearsing musicians who really can’t be bothered! A Japanese record company are re-issuing 3 of my old power pop albums from the early 80s in Japan at the end of September. My brother and I are taking a band out to gig there in

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Autumn 2007 - rapport

Nov, so I am trying to ﬁnd time to get that rehearsed too...and I am in the most consistently resourceful place I have ever been. I intend to stay there. The view is much better. Thank you NLP. Clive Culbertson

Dear Rapport ANLP – A strategic decision I’ve heard lots of arguments for, and against, joining ANLP and, quite frankly, most of what I‘ve been hearing seems to be based on good old fashioned model-bias. So, I thought I would put my money where my mouth is and say why I, as an INLPTA certified NLP Trainer, decided to join, and promote, ANLP. I’ve been aware of ANLP for quite some time, originally when it was under other management for want of a better phrase, and never really done anything to find out more. Then, around the middle of 2006, my path crossed that of Karen Moxon when she came along to an evening presentation that I was giving in East London. Taking the opportunity to find out more about both the person and the organisation, I spent quite a lot of time talking with Karen, both that evening and later. I was impressed by a number of things: Karen’s fierce determination to make ANLP an

open and inclusive organisation that didn’t owe its existence, or fealty, to one or more specific trainers and their models; her congruence with a desire to support the end user of NLP by providing an open unbiased source of information that will help them make their decision as to who they choose to work, or learn with; above all of this, I was greatly moved by Karen’s desire to see NLP put within reach of the great many people who really need it and have not, until now, had access – in education and in the challenged communities. For me, NLP is greater than any one celebrity trainer or the titular thrills that seem to go with many organisations – Master this and Meta Master that – it’s about facilitating change. ANLP supports both the trainer and the end user in that. ANLP enables me to offer my Practitioner students a recognised professional organisation that provides them with a marketing resource through its database, information through an excellent magazine, access to reduced-price professional insurance (vital to the ethical practitioner) and a sense of “belonging”. It also provides me with a flexibility of approach for my corporate clients who want a certified NLP programme specific

to business and not a therapeutic journey. I tell all of my students about ANLP and I encourage them to join. I consider my standards as a trainer to be as high as anybody’s and ANLP in no way threatens those standards, indeed it strengthens them. For me, it was a strategic decision to join ANLP and, having done that, I am very pleased I did. Keep up the good work ANLP. Ralph Watson ANLP Accredited Trainer INLPTA Trainer Turkey and the Middle East

LETTER OF THE ISSUE

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DEBATE

NLP – as seen on TV The worlds of entertainment and therapy have different needs. Whilst therapy should always concentrate on the client, entertainment must focus some of its attention on the audience. When techniques appear to be common to both worlds, it causes some people in the therapeutic area to ask the question, ‘is the entertainment use of these techniques a good thing?’ Andy Coote asks the question and invites you to join the debate

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he perception of NLP and hypnotherapy is affected by the use of some similar techniques in various branches of the entertainment industry. Stage hypnosis, which is purely aimed at entertaining, leads to some issues which all of our interviewees, in their roles as therapists, have had to deal with. “Some of my clients are scared of hypnosis and have a perception of mind control which is not true”, comments Claire Louise Hegarty. “People are always in charge and in control.” Alan Jones agrees, “As someone who has done stage hypnosis and uses hypnotherapy techniques, I am aware that there is a perception of what hypnosis is and that perception is usually drawn from the media. Their first fear is often “will you make me bark like a dog?” Sometimes, perceptions can be more extreme. David Griffiths recalls a conversation about NLP with a fellow tutor in college. “He turned on me with anger and passion. In his eyes NLP was something manipulative and the work of the devil.” By explaining the origins and purpose of NLP, the conversation changed to a more positive tone. “He had gained his opinions from the press and from literature he had read and not from any personal experience”. Jones notes that, in fact, stage hypnosis is not what the media report it to be. The subjects tend to collude with the hypnotist because they have been carefully selected. By lacing his opening patter with flattering statements (an ego supposition) and then removing some of the selected group, the hypnotist creates a ‘chosen few’ who are “either willing to collude or just good subjects. I would suggest that more than 90% are not actually hypnotised in the therapeutic sense of the word. They are going along with the experience.” Whilst stage hypnosis makes little pretence to therapy, some entertainers mix NLP with magic and stage hypnosis. It can appear that it is all done using highly developed NLP techniques but all is not as it seems. After a Derren Brown TV recording, an NLP Practitioner remarked to Alan Jones that “I don’t understand how he does what he does”. “That’s not surprising,”

DEBATE

notes Jones, “because only a small part of what he does is the psychological stuff. The rest is showmanship and mechanics. It is pure illusion”. But that has its place in change work, too. “On stage I never forget that I’m entertaining. I’m not there to fix people. My aim, though, is to make people think, “Did I just see that? Is that really possible?” There are areas of TV output or major stage presentations where the apparent objective is to ‘fix’ people. This may be done in groups (as with Paul McKenna and Tony Robbins) or with individuals in front of an audience in shows like Jerry Springer, Jeremy Kyle and Trisha. Do these approaches put therapy in a good or bad light? “I’ve seen Paul McKenna working with people on TV and it all seemed perfectly ethical to me,” notes Hegarty. “It is perfectly possible to have congruency with the client whilst on TV. The people have chosen to work with him, know what is happening and make a choice to be there. If the results are trackable and show improvement, and they often do, that is fine with me.” Jones agrees but sees a risk, “The danger is that it may devalue some individual work but, on the other hand, it could inspire confidence in the NLP community and in the feeling that these processes work”. Griffiths has concerns about the emergence of a cult of celebrity within the NLP community which leads to people selling “the person doing the training rather than NLP itself ”. It is, he thinks, being sold as a good way of making a lot of money by a few people. Jerry Springer and Jeremy Kyle create mixed feelings in our interviewees. Jones is concerned that “people are being deconstructed publicly in an aggressive way. On a recent Springer show, the audience was encouraging the participants to ‘argue naked’. That has more to do with gladiatorial combat than therapy”. Hegarty sees it differently, “Jeremy Kyle works with permission to tell people what he sees. Being honest whilst in rapport works very well to move people forward. I think we only see the tip of the iceberg with these shows and there are therapists working in the background to support the participants. Trisha, for example, has used Timeline Therapy™ on her shows to

In his eyes NLP was something manipulative and the work of the devil good effect”. Jones makes the case for magic being a traditional way of communicating that goes back into our distant past. “If you trace the heritage of magicians back then you end up with a village shaman and the shaman was the intermediary between the divine and the mundane. They were also the storytellers, entertainers, therapists and the source of knowledge and wisdom within the village. On stage, my aim, in NLP terminology, is to increase people’s perceptual maps. I want them to go “is that possible, did he really do that, can he really read my thoughts or is it just a clever trick and how does it work?” I move them out of their comfort zone. That’s the game Derren Brown plays a lot and I love it because of that. It can trigger change”. Hegarty also recognises that entertainment has the potential to draw people to find solutions to problems and increase their opportunities to improve. “I think TV is an excellent way of showing people that there are other opportunities out there. If something inspired me on television, I’d find out more. As an example I came across NLP eight years ago, through reading about eye pattern recognition. So something on TV may spark more interest and lead people into a book maybe and then into training or therapy and finally into understanding”. There remains a big risk. All of the participants recognise it. Hegarty suggests, “TV distorts - which makes room for misunderstanding. The unconscious mind is filtering, - deleting, distorting and generalising all of the time including what is seen on TV. So what is received is not necessarily what was intended. When operating one-to-one you have feedback, should you choose to observe and act upon it. When you broadcast to a large unseen audience, you don’t have that, so

communication can be misinterpreted and the communicator may not even know that is happening”. So how do we ensure that NLP and hypnotherapy are perceived as we would like them to be? We cannot control the entertainers, so the solution probably has to come from within. “Arguments against NLP tend to be that it lacks apparent coherence and an underpinning philosophy,” suggests Jones. “I think it does have an underpinning philosophy but because of fragmentation and branding it lacks coherence and is open for attack. I have no problem with people branding themselves or their approach so long as they are honest about their heritage and where their ideas come from.” Grifﬁths adds, “There is an evangelical approach to NLP. It could, and should, be more scientiﬁc and regulated, with more testing of practitioners and the need for an evidence base to support claims. ANLP and others are beginning to introduce that concept”. For Hegarty there is an overriding concern, “It is important that there is integrity, good intent, and appropriate ecology. If we are acting for the best interests of all involved, there should be no problem”. To get involved in this debate, please go to http://www.anlp.org/forum/default. asp or write to letters@rapportmag.com

The Participants Alan Jones Mind Magician, NLP Master Practitioner and Hypnotherapist at QCS. http://www’qualitycoachingsolutions.com/ Claire Louise Hegarty Performance Coach, Breakthrough Therapist and Certiﬁed Reiki Master, Tranceformations Personal and Business Excellence http://www.tranceformations-pbe.com/ David Grifﬁths NLP Practitioner, Hypnotherapist, Life Coach Metamorphosis http://www.metamorphosis.me.uk/

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WHAT’S NEW

ANLP Trainers Accreditation – Making it easy to apply!

Additional beneﬁts for ANLP members and their families

e are happy to announce to members that The Hospital & Medical Care Association (HMCA) is introducing their benefit plans to ANLP members. ANLP is now an Introducer Appointed Representative to HMCA, which is authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority. These arrangements provide ANLP members (and their families) with a simple means of securing the benefits and services offered by HMCA. The services have already been appreciated by thousands of members of other participating groups for nearly 30 years. The schemes on offer include the following Plans:PRIVATE MEDICAL PLANS: • Members can save up to 50% on their current subscriptions.* (*Based on the savings made by members who enrol using the HMCA Transfer Facility.) • £250 per night NHS cash benefit claimable if treatment takes place in a NHS hospital. • The Plans offer 24-hour worldwide cover. • Special guaranteed transfer facility available with no break in protection. OTHER PLANS AVAILABLE FOR ANLP MEMBERS ARE; • HOSPITAL CASH • TERM LIFE • INCOME PROTECTION • DENTAL • PERSONAL ACCIDENT • TRAVEL • VEHICLE BREAKDOWN RECOVERY All plans carry a 30-day money-back guarantee and we hope that these services, arranged specifically for ANLP members, will be of benefit to you and your family. Ring HMCA today for a free no obligation quote for any of the above plans on 01423 866985. For online enquiries visit HMCA at http://www. hmca.co.uk/direct.htm

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Autumn 2007 - rapport

NLPs commitment to maintaining high standards and professionalism in the NLP community is echoed in their Trainers Accreditation Process. However, since the application process is the result of a combination of all the major training organisations methodologies, and is naturally quite in-depth, submitting an application can seem a little daunting, at first! To make this process as accessible and straightforward as possible, ANLP have created a Trainers Accreditation Application Form which accompanies and clarifies the Guide in a simple step by step process. Each section of the application form specifies what

information is needed and refers directly back to the Guide for further information. ANLP have also included a check list which applicants can use to ensure that they have included all the necessary information before submitting their application which saves both time and additional administration. To extend this further we are also in the process of providing an online application facility so all feedback will be gratefully received. If you would like to receive a copy of the Trainers Accreditation Guide and Application Form, please contact ANLP on 0208 275 1175 or email members@anlp.org

Online advertising for as little as £1 a day...

he power of the internet and the benefits it can bring to today’s businesses is well known and documented. ANLP consistently has a first page presence on the Google listings, without having to pay for any sponsored links. This speaks volumes and shows that people really do visit our website searching for information and guidance on NLP. Members of ANLP already benefit from that web presence through the Practitioner and Trainer search facilities, as well as the online Events Diary. In addition to this, over 150 enquiries per month are received by members from the public via the contact form on our website. ANLP members can now benefit even more from the ANLP powerful web presence through our new Online Advertising Service for as little as £30 a month. Here`s what one of our members has to say... “We`d really like to thank you

for creating such a cost effective advertising option for NLP academies to use for advertising their services on the ANLP website. We have been using a number of methods to get our branding established lately and with the help of your new online advertising offer, we have had a signiﬁcant surge in enquiries and hits to our Auspicium website. Thanks again for creating a great service that’s such value for money” If you are an ANLP member and would like to book your advert or require additional information please contact ANLP on 0208 275 1175. Alternatively you can book online by logging into your members proﬁle at http://www.anlp.org/login.asp

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NLP

Lessons in the Power of Inﬂuence Maybe it was inevitable that a teacher of high school children would have an interest in the dynamics of groups. When that teacher is the brother of one of the co-founders of NLP who was also inﬂuenced by Carl Rogers, that interest became a lifetime’s understanding. Andy Coote talks to Michael Grinder about Cats and Dogs and leaderless groups.

saw Michael Grinder in action at last year’s NLP Conference where he gave the Keynote speech on the first night. Appropriately for a night when the rain was torrential, his subject was ‘Cats and Dogs’. In a packed, and slightly steamy, hall in Regent’s College he demonstrated his own ability to work with groups. He had us first engaged and then involved. We’ll return to the Cats and Dogs theme presently, but first I want to give some background on the man himself. Michael was a high school teacher teaching the age group 15 to 18 for 17 years until 1983. In 1976 he met Carl Rogers, developer of personcentered approaches to counselling and psychotherapy. “It was the only time he went into public school to see if he could transfer his skills into that environment.” The influence of Rogers was soon evident in Michael, “I became Rogerian and my voice pattern went up and down and I had the head nodding. I was highly approachable and got along fine with most people.” But not all people were susceptible, “I found the Carl Rogers approach didn’t work for 20% of my students and that puzzled me for a long time. Eventually it dawned on me that Carl only ever taught people who wanted to be there and that I needed to develop techniques or strategies to work with people who just didn’t want to be there.” Carl Rogers, to me and maybe to many readers, is a name in the text books and a set of ideas. I ask about working with Rogers. “He created his own atmosphere which was not about learning from him but about learning from yourself. He was excellent at creating a safe atmosphere.” Michael comments “I’m much more directive than he was. His concept of a leaderless group fascinated me in terms of where we all ended up – empowered, but the length of time it took wouldn’t fit with the lifestyle I was in. So I tried to figure out how to arrive at empowerment without taking the length of time that he did. I had Carl Rogers acceptance, but not his patience. For my own sanity, I needed to have a different style.” Around the same time, through his brother John, he was becoming familiar with the early developments of NLP, still known as meta magic at that time. “John was developing NLP whilst I was still a teacher. He

invited me to watch him in the summertime when I was out of school and eventually invited me to become one of his eight or nine trainers for certification”. I wondered if being John Grinder’s brother had been an issue as he developed his career. Did people have expectations of how he would be? “I suppose there is a certain notoriety to it but I’ve never experienced prejudice or skewed expectations. I’m able to be myself as well as John’s brother.” From his early work with Carl Rogers and John Grinder, Michael chose to specialise in how groups interact. His early experience of working with groups of high-school age kids clearly had an influence on this. There was also a gap in knowledge that interested him. “The limitation of most psychological models in my experience and I include in that Carl Rogers, transactional analysis and NLP, is that they focus on the individual and on one-toone communication and not on how groups work. With a larger group, where involvement is involuntary, group dynamics moves things on from one-to-one communication. It moves from focusing on an internal model to focusing on the external model. Anthony Robbins does a great job of getting hundreds of people to access their internal states as part of a group but generally it doesn’t happen that way”. Given his background, it is no surprise that he spends 65% of his time working with educators. Because of the value of his time most of that is in the training room with the educators themselves. “I’d much rather be in reality instead of the training room and I target to get into at least 100 classrooms in a year. I recently trained all of the teachers in one school and was able to follow up with them in the classroom. It was an interesting experience for me. It was like having created the song, discovering that other singers can also sing it. It’s about trying not to do what is idiosyncratically me but what is truly transferable.” He emphasises the use of external skills in the classroom and sees a specific role for NLP. “The main benefit for me in being trained in NLP is that it sharpened my eyes and ears in terms of perception. I observed the external effects on others, for example, when a teacher does this thing, his

I had Carl Rogers acceptance, but not his patience. For my own sanity, I needed to have a different style

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Autumn 2007 - rapport

NLP

class will then do that thing the group together and and I was able to understand motivated. This requires the patterns. I didn’t get it a level of cat within the to work in a group setting, leader and leaders must particularly an involuntary ensure that they don’t get group setting, and came to promoted past their level the conclusion that in such of catness”.[See box for circumstances it is better more] to use your NLP skills on Michael is very keen to yourself to determine the understand the difference external skills that you could between permission and use or ways of giving those authority. “Permission NLP skills to others in the involves a paradigm group.” shift and some cultures Those patterns have been developed into a set of techniques to find that difficult to understand. In your article about Christina Hall elicit the desired responses from the group – what Michael refers to (Rapport Summer 2007) she talks about rapport not being a single Pentimento* and as ‘the science and art of non verbal communication’. event but a continuous process – that, I believe, is permission”. These techniques are taught around the globe in his Group Mastery Michael’s new book The Elusive Obvious will be published shortly. I programme. It is not, Michael asserts, an easy course but “the numbers caught Michael between finalising that and heading out on the road for attending as well as the number of people who finished the course another tour. are excellent. You need staying power to be certified and participants Michael believes that “we are in love with the influence of power, will certainly work their tails off ”. As well as 16 days of contact time when we really need to be in love with the power of influence”. The over 10 months, students will also log power template, he asserts, ”is in every week of the first 5 months, short-term, focuses on the issue complete worksheets on the site and level of the communication and Cats and dogs in corporate life? then send them through to Michael is results-oriented. Whereas, who provides professional feedback. influence is longer term, focuses Michael Grinder proposes that we all exhibit dog or cat tendencies and that understanding them and knowing the signs For the final section of the course, on the relationship level of the will lead to better group work and individual performance. the students will videotape themselves communication and is more Dogs are high accommodators and have low independence whilst “to demonstrate their understanding process-oriented”. cats are very much the opposite. The higher the level you reach in of 50 out of 130 skills. They bring Michael, himself, is the very your job, the more cat is needed but a mixture of characteristics the videotape to the final session model of the power of influence. from both is desirable. At the NLP Conference in 2006, the whole for assessment”. room role-played being cats, dogs or an observer. It is impossible These external skills also apply Pentimento to summarise the concepts in a small box like this however, dogs in corporate environments. “When Is a term borrowed from the treat others how they want to be treated (a stroke because they leaders no longer have face-to-face art world and refers to the are selfless) and cats expect to be treated as they want to be treated (a stroke because they are WONDERFUL). contact with the team, they can start underlying foundation of a representing them not as human beings painting – effectively what lies Graham Willson and Hazel Ann Lorkins of GLD Training will be but as the position. This is where the beneath the surface to make exploring Cats and Dogs at this year’s NLP Conference, 23rd ‘cats and dogs’ work is useful. I work up the painting we see. The –25th November 2007 at Regents College, London (http://www. with people in senior positions who are pentimento of communication is nlpconference.co.uk/). They also deliver Michael’s programmes and products in the UK. (http://www.gldassociates.co.uk/) responsible for large groups of possibly made up of the four non-verbal Group Mastery in the UK is delivered by Michael Grinder with more than 50 and who may not be ingredients: Visual, Auditory, ITS and the next course begins in May 2008 - http://www.itsnlp. able to recognise the faces let alone Kinesthetic and Breathing. com/groupmastery.htm./ have any real knowledge of the people, Grinder recommends that these in order to ensure that they keep be learnt in all their combinations.

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NEWS

ANLPNews Supporting Children with Challenging Behaviour

n event for teachers & parents, Innovate to Educate’s latest seminar is being held on Sunday 28th October 2007 in London EC1. During the event you will ﬁnd out about the 9 points to improve your child’s learning, behaviour and social skills as well as the 4 temperament types of children. The event also aims to help teachers to learn how to get the most from a challenging student. To ﬁnd out full details about the workshops and the work ‘Innovate to Educate’ does, visit www.innovate2educate.co.uk

ANLP CPD Online now live

Visit www.anlp.org for more information

With Your Help ANLP Takes NLP to India

s part of our ever increasing International membership, ANLP has now expanded into India with the very first ANLP accredited training by Peak Performance. This will be a seven day accelerated practitioner training with pre-learning via CD’s, DVD’s and a reading list, running from 22nd-28th October 2007. However, they need your help as they are looking for assistants for this course. Although no financial help can be provided, accommodation in India will be provided for the duration of the course, for a total of nine nights. If you wish to stay on in India for a vacation after the course they would be happy to advise on locations and to arrange internal flights and accommodation for you at local Indian prices. This will be a wonderful opportunity for those wishing to expand their NLP skills and to experience NLP in a different cultural setting. To explore this opportunity further please contact David Lincoln on psychologist@therapist.net

ANLP Competition Winner!

arlier this year as part of a renewal membership scheme ANLP offered their members the chance to win a relaxing day break at a leading Health Spa. Congratulations to Helen Drake from

London, who we are delighted to announce as the lucky winner! Helen has won a luxury day at one of Champneys exclusive health resorts. The ANLP team would like to wish her a lovely day and hope that she

remembers to anchor all those relaxing moments! If you would like to relax and unwind in one of Champneys Health Resorts please visit www.champneys.com

NLP Coach and NLP Master Coach Certiﬁcation available for the ﬁrst time

LP Practitioners and NLP Master Practitioners now have a route towards an exciting new coaching certiﬁcation. The American Board of NLP (ABNLP) has begun recognising The Performance Partnership’s NLP Practitioners as NLP Coaches on completion of their Accelerated ‘Coaching Skills for NLP’ers’ conversion course. The Performance Partnership’s NLP Master Practitioners will be awarded the status of NLP Master Coach on completion of the

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same programme. Commenting on these developments, David Shephard, Chairman and Head of Research and Training at The Performance Partnership said: - “I am delighted by the award of this International accreditation. It is excellent news for our clients and is further recognition that coaching is an excellent application of the NLP toolbox. As a qualiﬁed NLP Practitioner or NLP Master Practitioner, you already have the most powerful change tools at your ﬁngertips, it

is just a matter of learning to use them within the parameters of coaching” For details of the remaining 2007 NLP Coach and NLP Master Coach programmes, ring Jonathan or Sally on +44 (0) 208 9929523 or visit www.performancepartnership. com/mastercoach/

Q. Do you want to be a Certified Master Practitioner of NLP, a Master Hypnotist, a Master Practitioner of Time Line Therapy ® and an NLP Master Coach by December 2007? A. Then book these courses now! THE NLP PRACTITIONER CERTIFICATION THE FASTEST & EASIEST WAY TO LEARN NLP

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PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Expanding the Parameters

of Possibility

Michael Spence shares his enthusiasm about the NLP Presuppositions with Caitlin Collins

hile critics of NLP may perceive its lack of coherent theory to be a flaw, enthusiasts are likely to consider it an asset. A major virtue of NLP, they would argue, is its flexibility: you can apply it anywhere, and its absence of dogma means that you’re spared noisy dogma-fights with competing theories – they can’t get hold of enough to sink their teeth into. The NLP Presuppositions are sometimes accused of coming under the heading of NLP theory, but they can put up a strong defence against such a charge: neither theories nor beliefs, they are simply invitations to imagine expanding the parameters of possibility by considering what it might be like if we were to act as if we believed something. NLP: No-Limits People Scottish NLP Trainer Michael Spence is very enthusiastic about the Presuppositions. As he describes it, the letters NLP stand for ‘No-Limits People – those who keep going to fulfil their dreams, whatever happens.’ Citing various descriptions of the highest levels of human development, such as Wayne Dyer’s concept of mastery, Abraham Maslow’s selfactualisation, Carl Jung’s individuated person and Carl Rogers’s fully functioning person, Michael maintains that working with the Presuppositions can facilitate our reaching these levels by providing a context for acting effectively and a foundation for creating the results we want. He likes to introduce them early in NLP training. ‘People first encountering NLP are often confused by the jargon,’ he explains. ‘And the lack of a clear definition of what it actually is also contributes to confusion! Students who are finding it hard to take in the models, patterns and techniques may find that their usual learning approaches, such as conventional assessments of passing or failing, are not always the most appropriate for learning NLP. Introducing the Presuppositions as operating principles early on, and asking students to experiment with suspending disbelief and acting “as if ” they were true, can really help.’ Lists of the Presuppositions vary and NLP enthusiasts usually have their favourites. Michael has chosen three of his own personal hits from the lists to share with Rapport readers.

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1. The meaning of your communication is the response you get We’re all communicating all the time, not only through our words but also our tone of voice, actions, body language and gestures. And what about how we communicate to ourselves: our self-talk, and how we treat our bodies and minds? ‘If you’re in a meeting, sitting to one side, arms folded, a scowl on your face, not making any attempt to take part in the discussion – what are you communicating, loud and clear?’ asks Michael. ‘Or if you choose not to reply to an email or telephone message: what message are you sending? ‘Are you aware of how people are responding when you’re trying to communicate something to them? Do they seem to be understanding what you’re saying, or do they seem to be more or less confused? The presupposition here is that people are responding to what they think you mean – which is not necessarily what you intended to mean! The point is that if we want people to understand us and respond to what we intended, we must communicate with them and not just talk at them. We need to be continually aware of their responses, and adjust our communication accordingly, rather than assuming they’ll understand us accurately!’ 2. There’s a positive intention behind all human behaviour There are distinctions to be made between self, intention and behaviour. A person is not the same as his or her behaviour, and underlying any behaviour there is a positive intention – no matter how far this seems to have gone astray in terms of how the behaviour manifests. ‘A number of years ago I worked with a woman who self-harmed,’ recounts Michael. ‘She would methodically cut herself on each arm. This behaviour manifested following a breakdown in her relationship in which she had found herself in a classic double-bind: she didn’t want to leave her partner, but neither did she want any relationship with him. So why did she cut herself ? She had very low esteem and little self-conﬁdence. She found friendships difﬁcult to maintain, and now this relationship had become intolerable to her. Cutting her arms, destructive as it appeared and painful as it undoubtedly was, brought her the attention she longed for. There was a positive intention behind it, and the key to resolving the apparently bizarre behaviour lay not in simply pathologising and

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

rapport - Autumn 2007

| 15

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

What could you achieve, if you knew you couldn’t fail? Blocked avenues become paths to fulfilment trying to get rid of it but in exploring other, better ways to honour the underlying intention.’ 3. There is no failure, only feedback Michael finds this to be the most inspiring of all the Presuppositions. He asserts that one of the quickest ways to change our habitual limitations is to shift our focus by asking ourselves a simple but empowering question: ‘What could I achieve if I knew I couldn’t fail?’ Well, what would your life be like if you knew you could not fail? What would you accomplish, complete, tackle, or change if you knew that whatever you did, you could not fail? How about, instead of judging yourself or your performance to be a ‘failure’, simply evaluating your performance in order to make the necessary changes so you can do better next time? With a wave of a wand, all previously conceived ‘failures’ and associated negativities have been transformed into learning opportunities! ‘Let me show you what I mean,’ says Michael. ‘Think of something you’re currently anticipating – maybe with some apprehension – in the near future. Now change your perspective of that anticipated event by focusing on what you can do differently to transform the experience into something positive and compelling. In other words, if you could alter any of the components in your experience to change and enhance how you feel about it, what would you change? ‘Suddenly new horizons and opportunities open up. Things previously perceived as difficulties become much easier to overcome. Blocked avenues open up to become paths to fulfilment! ‘Since taking this idea on board I’ve achieved more than I thought possible. I can actually identify with being a No Limits Person because I know that in everything I do there is no failure only feedback!’ Michael tells a personal story to illustrate how this particular Presupposition could have a big effect if adopted within our educational systems. ‘I used to mentor a secondary school pupil,’ he recalls. ‘His least favourite subject was maths, and when I first met him he had just managed to achieve 30% in his latest maths test. He very clearly

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perceived this as failure – as did his teacher. But I reframed the 30% into a baseline, a starting point from which to prepare for his next test in a few weeks’ time. So when he got 34% in the second test it was an improvement of 4%! But although he and I looked on this as progress, his teacher wasn’t convinced: she still saw it as 34% = failure. Now here’s the great part: the boy stood up to his teacher and said, “No, I’m not a failure! Look – I’m improving! That’s progress, not failure!” He opened that teacher’s mind to the possibility of progress! And all the time I worked with him, he continued to make steady progress, proving the effectiveness of this Presupposition. It’s about effective learning. I believe that if this principle could be adopted in our schools it would make a radical difference.’ Suspend disbelief... Michael has something to add to the NLP theory or lack-thereof debate. ‘NLP is largely based on practical experience rather than academic theories,’ he says; ‘however the Presuppositions, some of which are unique to NLP and some of which are borrowed from other ﬁelds such as general semantics and cybernetics, are useful as a guide to the principles underlying NLP practice. Sometimes the succinct way in which they are expressed is criticised as being too vague; but in reality, correctly applied, they are extremely useful. But don’t take my word for it – try them out for yourself ! Why not start right now: just suspend disbelief for a moment, and let yourself imagine the possibilities and opportunities that would open up for you and how enriched you would become. Just imagine yourself as a No Limits Person ... what differences would that make to your life, and to the lives of those around you?! Michael Spence will be presenting a workshop on the NLP Presuppositions, ‘No Failure, Only Feedback’, at the NLP Conference, 23, 24, 25 November, Regent’s College, London www.nlpconference.co.uk

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EDUCATION

Towards can-do education - teaching with a skills focus by Faith Tait

here’s a movement afoot in primary education. Yes, another one. It’s happening on an optional basis, but it is happening. The shift lies with the focus; where the teaching and learning is centred. Whereas teaching has been focused on knowledge, and some teachers now describe this as ‘in the past’, the attention for both teacher and learner is on a set of skills, and those skills are not only for classroom learning but also for life. The emphasis shifts from the facts or ‘what’ of a topic, to the ‘how’ of learning about it. Many teachers will respond that they have taught skills in the past, that this is not fresh and there’s nothing new under the sun. Others who are putting this into practice are saying that what is new is the focus and its results; it’s what happens when ‘what skill are you teaching?’ is the framing question and children conclude their own ‘I can’ statements from their learning. So this is a gentle enquiry, ﬂuidly using some NLP distinctions to describe the experience of one teacher and her primary school pupils as they move into a skills based approach, framed by the key skills outlined in the National Curriculum Handbook for primary teachers in England 1999 (see box). My interviewee is Sharon Hellyer, a primary teacher at Bowerhill Primary School in Wiltshire. Sharon and her Year 3 class of eight year olds have worked with the system only from May until July this year. Already there’s a demonstrable increase in resourcefulness in the children as, in a world where lifelong learning is a necessity and many would say a delight, they begin to form real independence as learners.

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Behind my questioning was Robert Dilts’ framework of neurological levels which combine in any human experience; the environment, behaviour, skills and capabilities, beliefs and values, identity and sense of self, and our sense of connectedness to a larger system. These are sometimes correspondingly and usefully given as ‘where, what, how, why, who and who else’. In moving the attention from the content or information of a subject to ‘how shall we learn about it?’, there is a shift to a different level that is revealing this different order of learning. There are, for example, positive impacts on the children’s conﬁdence and a sense of self as an able and resourceful

learner. And the developments are transferring to life outside the classroom, as is evidenced both in class work and parents’ comments. Some questions await answers as these are early days, but in the meantime, for Sharon and her class, it’s looking good. The signs are that children take pleasure in what they’re doing and what their skills get for them, and they know what they’re doing. ‘They become

much more independent learners, and this grows as they repeat their skills,’ says Sharon. So if you went into a classroom where this kind of learning was happening, would you see anything different? Probably not, immediately. But look at any displays on the walls, and you will see not ‘the Tudors, their life and times’ but ‘how we found out about the Tudors, their life and times’. The display would demonstrate the techniques and the discovered, sorted, interpreted and presented information about Tudor life. What are they doing in that classroom? You would observe a variety of activities and the variety might be greater, since Sharon finds this approach affords greater creativity. However the options are different. For example, after finding your information about the subject via IT and books, you would see and hear Sharon modelling how to design and draw a table within which you are to present information: ‘This is how I measure what I need; notice how I doing this, how I hold the ruler; now I’m checking - does it look straight?’ and so on. ‘The difference,’ says Sharon, ‘is that presenting information in this way is the point of this lesson. In the past with knowledge based learning, especially if I was pressed for time, I might have given the children the tables ready drawn and had them fill in the frames with their information. With this approach that’s not an option: presenting information in a table format is the lesson.’ When she looks at the children’s work and listens to them, Sharon’s shift in skills is to notice to how they have used theirs, rather than listen for the information they have

EDUCATION

It’s the focus that makes all the difference

found. But although the information about, say, the Tudors or healthy eating or holidays appears to be simply grist to the mill of the handling skills, it does get learned. Time and time again, Sharon has had evidence that the pupils do acquire and appreciate the information. Class discussions focused on the subject matter are energetic, with more eager, more participative pupils. Asked why she thinks this is, she says; ‘I think it’s because they are relaxed about the information. They might learn it incidentally, but they learn it.’ What of the impact of this approach on their sense of themselves as learners? Sharon finds the approach inclusive in that children who find difficulty in some areas can have them strengthened and developed. For example, one of her pupils had problems in spatial awareness, resulting in writing sentences with words running together and squished together on a page. He did not altogether get this sorted the first time he tried drawing a table. The second time - success. Pleasure. Achievement. Can do; ‘I can.’ And he knows he can do it again and again. Sharon is sure that, as the children are

aware of using their skills, they have the potential to increase awareness of themselves and how they connect to others. ‘In having to listen and speak, agree and compromise, the leaders might have to learn not to lead at all times,’ she says. ‘They are certainly learning about themselves.’ ‘They can’t not be involved,’ says Sharon, ‘and they can’t not do it.’ Cross-curricular lessons combine with the skills approach to keep interest and curiosity high. For example for one lesson the children explored the wheel of health symbol on the packaging of foods in supermarkets: fat, carbohydrates etc. This is about healthy eating, part of Science. They then designed, made and ate their own sandwiches - yes, really, all 28 eight year olds. (I leave it to your imaginations) This is Design and Technology. They then evaluated their work, which in general hasn’t been easy for them, especially in saying what was good about it. However, they are learning by keeping a journal in which they write every day about one thing they have done well. ‘At ﬁrst they wrote about something they had achieved in the playground,’ says Sharon. ‘Then I said alright, but they must also include

one thing they did well in a lesson, and it mustn’t be something I have rewarded them for.’ There are questions, such as can the children still get lost in content, not always a bad thing; can they still get engrossed in a story? Or does keeping information at the arms length of awareness drive that out? No, the children still enjoy stories. Can they relish the information they discover? Eager, participative class discussions at the end of projects such as learning about animals who breathe, would suggest that they do. And where doesn’t this approach ﬁt? Sharon doesn’t know yet and her beliefs about it are still being formed. ‘It’s early days, and I’m looking for it to fall down, but so far, it hasn’t.’ What of the impact on assessments such as SATS? Again, it’s early days and yet to be discovered. For now, Sharon says: ‘I feel like I’m really teaching. Sometimes it all seems so obvious. Then I remember the focus. It’s the focus that makes all the difference. ‘We are moving towards learners for life. In this world there’s an inundation of knowledge. The skills of critically evaluating especially are more valuable than ever, in whatever chosen path they take.’ Faith Tait Associates: www.faithtaitnlp.co.uk For info on the curriculum: www.nc.uk.net

Key skills; categories with examples of techniques Communication - literacy skills including speaking, listening, reading and writing, groups discussions, working on texts. Application of number - numeracy including mental calculation, to process data and solve problems Information technology - use a range of resources and ICT tools to ﬁnd, analyse, interpret, evaluate and present information for a range of purposes Working with others - including contributing to small groups and whole class discussions Improving own learning and performance - reﬂecting and evaluating their own work and where they might improve Problem solving - skills and strategies for solving problems in learning and life: identifying understanding and planning ways to solve, monitor progress and review solutions

rapport - Autumn 2007

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INTERNATIONAL

A FLASH OF LIGHTNING IN THE EAST Master Trainer Alex Cheung is promoting NLP in China and Hong Kong Caitlin Collins reports

NLP member Dr Alex Cheung is a man with a mission: he and his colleagues are in the vanguard of the meteoric rise of NLP in Hong Kong, mainland China, Macao and Taiwan. With a professional background in engineering, Alex’s passion for NLP is firmly based on its practical applications. ‘Not only did NLP bring me tremendous benefits in terms of my own health, work and relationships,’ he says; ‘I could see how those benefits could spread beyond me to my family and community.’ And, as friends noticed the changes happening in Alex’s life and encouraged him to start teaching, he embarked on further training around the world, including time at NLP University in Santa Cruz, and a career change was the next step. When Alex began offering training in Hong Kong just six years ago, NLP was already available but was maintaining a relatively low profile. ‘It was primarily perceived as being for individuals interested in the spiritual or therapeutic applications. Classes were small, and the standard of trainings available was rather uneven.’ Since then that early spark has blazed into flames. Whereas six years ago a class might attract 10 people, classes and courses are now attracting up to 60 students. Reaching out mainly to the corporate world, Alex’s company employs 10 qualified trainers. Students include business people and professionals such as doctors, solicitors and government officials eager not only to learn NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner skills, but also to apply them in areas such as business management, coaching, leadership, sales and mediation. Several universities are also offering NLP courses, further enhancing the image of NLP in the public perception. Some of the credit for the rapid increase

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in popularity of NLP must go to the Hong Kong Government, which provides financial help to students completing Governmentrecognised NLP training courses. However, the growth of NLP is now extending beyond the confines of Hong Kong. ‘We’ve been offering Trainer training in Hong Kong for some time,’ says Alex, ‘and now, having already run successful Master Practitioner programmes in mainland China, we’re looking forward to offering the first ever Trainer training there next year. We already have people signing up for it! So it’s really taking off there as well.’

commitment is greater.’ The future looks bright ‘There’s colossal potential here in Asia,’ Alex insists. ‘NLP is already hugely popular, and the Government support really helps. And there’s also plenty of room for improvement. Even in Hong Kong, where people are already business-oriented and ambitious, there’s still work to be done in presenting NLP as performanceenhancing rather than therapeutic. And in Taiwan that remains our main challenge: changing the existing perception of NLP as being limited to therapy, which attracts only small numbers, and taking it out into the business world. Another thing to tackle is the uneven quality of the trainings available. There are now thousands of people training every year in Hong Kong, China and Taiwan, and there’s a great need to bring the standards up to international levels.’ Alex is optimistic about future prospects in this regard. He’s delighted that the UK’s Middlesex University is launching an MA degree course in Work-Based Learning, including NLP in training and coaching, in Hong Kong. And, as ANLP’s contact for Hong Kong, China and Taiwan, he is also keen to ensure that ANLP will play a part in helping to promote high training and ethical standards in the rapidly growing world of NLP in Asia. For more information about Dr Alex Cheung’s company, Professional Training and Strategy Ltd, please visit his website: www.nlppro.com

Whereas six years ago a class might attract 10 people, classes and courses are now attracting up to 60 students

The lightning flash Translation issues are important. In Hong Kong many people are bilingual, so trainings can be offered in English as well as Cantonese. But there’s more to it than language – there are also cultural aspects to translation. The key is to match NLP concepts to analogous ideas present in Chinese culture. ‘For example, we already have our own traditional version of the NLP presupposition “There is no failure, only feedback” – we say that “Failure is the mother of success”. And in mainland China the swish pattern seems to make more sense to people if we call it the lightning flash!’ Alex sees the people in mainland China as rather more conservative than those in Hong Kong. ‘They’re more cautious, and they have more doubts about the practical uses of NLP. But they are passionate about learning; and, because living standards are lower, their financial investment in the training is relatively higher, so in a way their

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CELEBRITY

GETRUDE MATSHE THERE’S A VERY THIN VEIL BETWEEN US AND WHAT WE WANT by Eve Menezes Cunningham

etrude Matshe was named after a rebellious grandmother who had been taken away from her parents to be raised by white nuns in an orphanage. This was quite common at the time and must have been heartbreaking. But this little girl, who didn’t know anything about her heritage or even her African name, decided to change the new one: Gertrude became Get Rude and no amount of punishment would get her to change back. Getrude Matshe has inherited this audacity and spirit. In Zimbabwe, where she was born and raised, the average life expectancy for a woman is 34. But now she’s made such a success of her life, she is determined to do whatever she can to help her country heal. Getrude says that although she is not the typical African woman, her life purpose is to give a voice to African women. She says, “Africa is a hard continent to live on but it prepares you to live anywhere.” She and her husband grew desperate to leave their home and she had several Batik workshops lined up to earn good money in the US. She planned to go ahead with her children and would send for her husband when she’d saved enough for his fare. But when they changed planes in Johannasburg, an administrative error on one of her children’s visas led to them being sent back to Zimbabwe. Their error, she was told, would cost her $6million to correct. And when they tried to get a refund on the unused tickets to America, she was told that this would be impossible. So her spirits were quite low. The amazing life she’d been on the verge of had been taken away. But then 9/11 happened and Getrude realised that, based on where her workshops would have taken place and

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the timings, she’d almost certainly have been killed. Later, she says, she and her husband took another gamble and put their life savings into a home in New Orleans. When this was destroyed by Hurricane Katrina, Getrude got the message that she wasn’t meant to live in America. Things started changing for her. That day, Getrude had read a quote: “If a man kicks you in the butt, let it push you towards your goal.” At this point, a cousin who was in New Zealand tracked her down via the internet and sent her an email inviting her to move there. So Getrude went ahead with the kids planning to send for her husband as soon as possible. She and her kids were sleeping on her cousin’s ﬂoor and she had no idea how to get a job, home and daycare. One evening, Getrude

found herself in an exclusive Wellington neighbourhood. Looking in an estate agent’s window she dreamed about living there and wished she could afford it. Then she met a woman who said that she knew of a place, in that area, that might be perfect for her. She even got the rent reduced until she could ﬁnd work. So Getrude moved into a beautiful neighbourhood that was technically way out of her price range. Her new friend told the people living on the street that any household items would be appreciated. Getrude says, “I found everything I needed on my doorstep.” Soon, her home was fully furnished. It was as if the second she realised she needed something, from a table to blankets, a kindly neighbour would appear with the item she had

CELEBRITY

just thought of. This all sounds like a fairy tale but Getrude’s resourceful attitude is what has enabled her to take advantage of every opportunity. One evening, she was listening to film director Peter Jackson giving a speech. When question time came around, the fan of his earlier Lord of the Rings asked how she could get a part in his forthcoming remake of King Kong. This led to her being asked if she knew of several hundred Africans in New Zealand who might like to be extras. Instead of gasping, “Oh, no, I just wanted a little part for me. I don’t know anything about hiring film extras” Getrude decided to try. She ended up trawling the streets and buses of New Zealand taking strangers’ pictures and building up an agency for film extras. Having provided all these extras, she was again disappointed to be told that she was too big to be one herself. But then she got a small role as a servant instead. Getrude had continued creating her beautiful Batik designs but felt disheartened that the New Zealand market was not interested in her African zebras and giraffes. Then she had a dream in which Grandmother Getrude was yelling at her. In English. Granddaughter Getrude knew she was really impatient. When she woke up, she still didn’t understand the message about “breaking the problem into little pieces.” But within three months she’d sold 1000 cushions that she’d made from the previously unwelcome material. Getrude and her husband’s families alone have 19 AIDs orphans. With 17 million in Africa, she wants to help “give this generation a hand up. When you give someone a handout you’re not empowering them, you’re disenfranchising them. Somewhere in our history, someone told us we were poor and we believed it. But Africa is one of the richest countries in the world in terms of gold and oil. We need to break the cycle.” So she’s written a book about her journey, Born on the Continent: Ubuntu. The profits are going into a charity, the Africa Alive Foundation, she’s launching. “Ubuntu” means “I would not be human unless

you were human acknowledging my humanity”. Getrude is applying the same visualisation techniques she’s used to lift herself out of poverty to launch this charity. To raise awareness, she’s been speaking internationally and has already seen several amazing coincidences. One example was visiting LA and being asked by a friend to come to church. She was about to say, “I’ve not been in 18 years – I’m not a Christian” but she heard an inner prompt telling her “Getrude, you need to pray.” So she went. And it turned out to be the Reverend Michael Beckwith’s church with a congregation of 10,000. She recognised him from The Secret and tried to get a meeting with him to talk about her charity. Instead, he offered her the floor so she could talk directly. Cheques are still pouring in. Getrude would love to meet Oprah Winfrey. She has been visualising this friendly chat with the help of a picture of Oprah and her best friend Gayle King (Editor at Large of O Magazine). When Getrude realised she needed to say when she wanted to meet Oprah by, she added a date to the picture. Getrude’s currently writing a screenplay and mentally “cast” Denzel Washington in her husband’s role. By another coincidence, her son got a part in a real film as Denzel Washington’s son. So she asked her son to ask Denzel if he remembered her. She’d been an extra on Cry Freedom for two weeks as a 19 year old in South Africa. He did and has agreed to be in her film pro bono if he can make his

Everything you want in life is already here

schedule work. Naturally, Getrude is already practicing her Oscar acceptance speeches (she’s after several awards). To make this feel more real, she’s using some fake Oscars she picked up in LA. She says, “My father taught me how to dream. There’s a very thin veil between us and what we want. Once you start reﬁning your vision, it’s like taking blinkers off. “It starts in the mind by you seeing it in pictures. Then you have to imagine yourself already having it.” Getrude says that writing her screenplay “seemed impossible”. Now she has “a movie producer ﬁnancing the movie and mentors to help write the script coming to me everyday. When I started, I just knew I wanted it so badly. I had no idea how to do it. Then I said it out loud, wrote it down in my book and the rest happened with no effort at all. “When you live life on the vibrational level, where you can feel and see your dreams unfolding, things just happen to you. What you want just comes to you through a series of amazing coincidences. It’s magical.” To buy Getrude’s book, visit http:// www.bornonthecontinent.com/

rapport - Autumn 2007

| 23

PROFESSIONAL

7 Strategies to

Boost Your Business 1.

Learn all you can about marketing Marketing is absolutely crucial to the success of your business and you avoid it at your peril! New business owners can think that marketing is quite a complicated process. However, it’s not rocket science and the basics can easily be learned. It can be very helpful to reframe selling as simply building relationships and having conversations. We can do this by talking to prospects and ﬁnding out more about them and what they want before we pitch in with what we can do for them. Learn as much as you can about marketing. For the small service business there are certain things that you can do that are low cost or even no-cost. So don’t be afraid of it – learn the steps that work for your size and type of business and go for it!

Market the results of your service – not the processes Beware of having a website or brochure that is too process driven. Market the results and beneﬁts of your service or product – not the features and processes. Coaches especially can fall into this trap. We tell people all about what coaching is and how it happens. It’s much more effective to actually state what changes people can expect from working with you. Using case studies and testimonials will really help you here – then it’s not just you saying “this is what you’ll get out of working with me “ – you’ll have other people saying it for you which is so much more powerful. Get into the habit of asking your 24 |

Autumn 2007 - rapport

new clients for testimonials and referrals.

Have a follow up system We all go to networking events and gather handfuls of business cards and we may even get as far as putting them into Outlook or some other contact system, but what do we do after that? I think it’s vital to have some form of “keep in touch” marketing such as a newsletter or blog. I really cannot overestimate

Make your Business Plan a living document and update it at least quarterly, or even better, every month. Let it help you stay on track and use it to capture new ideas.

Be the perceived expert It can take quite some time to build your reputation, but if you write, speak and network, then people will start to associate you with your niche. If you hate to do public speaking, you can still build up

Get into the habit of asking your new clients for testimonials and referrals the importance of follow up. By keeping in touch regularly, it means that when someone is ready to buy, your name and business is at the front of their mind because they have heard from you recently.

Have a written business plan A lot of small business owners tend to be a bit reactive when it comes to marketing their business and also a bit haphazard about which thing they should do next. Life’s events and distractions can take over and if we haven’t got a written plan we can lose sight of our goals. A Business Plan isn’t just something you do to get a bank loan. Think of it as the map and the plan for you to grow your business. Where do you want to be in six months; in a year; in 5 years? Arguably, the most important part of your Business Plan is the Marketing Plan.

expert status by doing a lot of writing. You can do this by writing articles for publication, having your own newsletter and by starting a blog. There are lots of groups out there looking for guest speakers. You may not get paid but think of it as fantastic free publicity. After all – the person at the front of the room giving the talk is a lot more memorable than one of 20 business cards you picked up!

Have a strong clearly defined niche Of course, in order to be perceived as an expert, you need to have a clearly defined niche. This is so important, yet many people try to be far too general in what they offer. One of the best ways to stand out in a crowded market is to be very specific about what you do and who you do it for. Some of the key benefits to having a niche are:

By Shona Partridge • It radically simpliﬁes your marketing • It makes it so much easier to say what you do and who you work with • It builds your reputation as an expert • It also builds your conﬁdence • People can refer potential clients more easily because they understand what you do • You develop a “Personal Brand” • People prefer to work with a specialist and expert • You can more easily identify your target market and where they congregate And – you get to work with your ideal clients

Pick a few simple marketing tasks and do them consistently C J Hayden the best-selling author of “Get Clients Now!” calls this “The Persistence Effect” and I have seen it work time and again in my own business and in my clients’ businesses. Try picking as few as ﬁve marketing tasks to concentrate on for a couple of weeks and see what happens. For instance, decide to write three articles, attend three networking events, follow up with ten people, start your newsletter or blog or arrange two speaking events. Pick your own ideas, but make it a short list. Many people tend to try “a bit of this and a bit of that” and they often give up too soon when a bit more persistence would have paid off. A few tasks done regularly over time will work much better than occasional bursts of activity and expense. www.womenmeanbusiness. co.uk

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HEALTH

EFT

Working with cravings and addictions

Eve Menezes Cunningham explains how it works

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HEALTH

f you’ve ever felt that a glass of wine or whisky, cigarette or slice of gateaux has you in it’s grasp, you might be interested to know that a meridian therapy known as Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) can get rid of your craving. Have you ever seen people on TV tapping acupressure points around their face, upper body and hands and wondered what they were doing? They may have been doing EFT. Also known as a tapping therapy, Gary Craig developed EFT as an offshoot from Thought Field Therapy. Often known as “Acupuncture without the needles” or “that weird tapping thing”, EFT releases emotional build up by tapping around meridian points so people can get on with their lives. For example, if you kept coming back to an unpleasant thought (anything from childhood abuse to an unpleasant email received this morning) this energy would be interfering with your day. EFT helps you to release the negative energy. It doesn’t change anything that’s happened to you but it helps you to untangle strong emotions and reduces the intensity. EFT is used a lot with people wanting to rid themselves of cravings and addictions because it helps them get to the root causes – the emotions – behind the symptoms. Lots of people love gateaux and wine. It can be a delightful treat but if people can’t stop at one slice or drink, there’s usually something deeper going on. You may have found that food or alcohol or cigarettes or drugs provided comfort from anxiety at some point so it soon starts to feel like a short cut to feeling better any time those anxious feelings threaten in the future. If your eating or any other habit feels out of control, can you think of the emotion behind the habit? Loneliness, betrayal, anger, memories of abuse, fear and all sorts of feelings that can feel pretty hard to stay with can be dealt with quickly and painlessly using EFT. The Practitioner will usually start by ﬁnding out a bit about your issue and, to help you both monitor the therapy’s effectiveness, you’ll be asked to pick a number between 0 and 10 to mark the strength of the feeling. The therapist will get you to repeat an appropriate phrase while tapping the part of your hand you’d use if you were going to perform a Karate chop. This phrase starts with

something tailored for your situation such as “Even though I keep eating too many crisps / drink too much / smoke too much / snort too much...” and then continues with the afﬁrmation “I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” This alone is incredibly powerful as many cravings and addictions stem from a feeling of being unlovable or unacceptable. This phrase is said aloud three times while tapping. Other meridian points are then tapped (by the eye, outside the eye, under the eye, the chin, high

on the chest, under the arm and then several spots on the hand) with shorter phrases. The ﬁrst round might include phrases like “Can’t get enough gateaux”, “Really love that cake”, “Can’t stop eating”, “Feeling enormous”, “No self control” and so on. The therapist will have picked up on your

I used to have puddings as starters feelings during the initial discussion. When I trained as an EFT Practitioner (www. applecoaching.com), this was the part I found

most astonishing. I’d been using NLP for a while but had often tried to fast forward through any negativity. With EFT wallowing in the fear and anxiety while you tap helps to release it. People often start laughing or tears might come but it’s all part of the release. Once this negativity is cleared, the therapist does a reframe round. These phrases might include things like “I eat nutritious and nourishing foods”, “I only eat when I’m hungry”, “I know when to stop.” Sometimes one round is all it takes to reduce the number from a 9 or 10 to a 0. Other times, it may reduce to a 7, 6, 5 and so on more gradually. When you ﬁnish, it’s easy to doubt that the feeling ever felt as intense as a 9 or 10 because you’ve now dealt with the issue. Natural Health Therapist and the EFT Trainer, Julia Johnson (www.julia-johnson. com) says, “EFT is very effective with cravings. You can tap for it there and then. People are often surprised that they don’t crave it again. I’d get them to tune in and focus on how much they wanted to have it and the idea of not having it.” She remembers one client who was very sociable but who felt that she was drinking too much wine. The idea that she couldn’t give it up was holding her back. Julia did some future pacing and put her in the restaurant so they could deal with her anxiety about not having wine. They reframed it so that wine became just wine rather than “the be all and end all”. Julia says, “All addictions are really an anxiety so EFT really does have a big impact.” A reformed chocoholic (“I used to have puddings as starters”), Julia used EFT herself to stop seeing chocolate as a reward. “With women, there’s a hormonal effect, too. At some times of the month, oestrogen affects insulin. You can tap at the times you’d normally have chocolate and notice a marked difference.” Emotional Freedom Therapist Bridget Herbert (www.healing-house.co.uk) uses lots of techniques to help her clients. From Hypnotherapy and NLP to Psychotherapy. Bridget says, “Smoking is a last ‘crutch’ for some people. EFT can help with that. Alcohol and drugs can be physically addictive. With smoking, people are more addicted to the habit

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HEALTH

than to the drug. You have to learn how to smoke a cigarette without ﬁnding it disgusting but the ﬁrst time you drink or take drugs can be absolutely brilliant. People don’t have to learn to become an alcoholic or drug addict.” Bridget feels that EFT can be a good “distraction”. Cravings last for about 2 minutes and the EFT process lasts for about 2 minutes. It’s good to have EFT in your toolkit because you can say to clients, ‘There’s something else that might help with this.’ Some people don’t want hypnosis and EFT can be empowering for them because they can do it later on their own. But craving chocolate, donuts, coffee or sex would need to be separated from alcohol and narcotic addictions. You can change the way the client perceives the chocolate and use EFT for

At its most simple level, it’s a distraction addictive behaviour.” Elaine Gold and her husband Dave Trevenna (www.life-enhanced.com) use EFT to help clients manage their weight and quit smoking. Elaine says, “We’ve developed our own weight management protocol using EFT. We’re looking at a very holistic approach. EFT works particularly well. Dave came across EFT about 10 years ago. It cuts right through to the emotions. Dave also uses it with smokers to get to the underlying issues. We’ve also helped clients with issues with drink. “For the weight management, we talk to people to ﬁnd out where they are now. We elicit any barriers, triggers and underlying issues with weight and take them to where they want to be. Each weight management session is in three parts. 1) We recap on nutrition, healthy eating and physical activity. 2) We use EFT to work though the programme we’ve written and deal with current issues for client and 3) we do a guided visualisation using NLP. We always give a free consultation beforehand where we do a little tester with EFT to see if it’s something that will work with them. “We explain it as ‘Here’s a tool that’s very effective in getting to

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underlying issues and changing them.’ We don’t go into a big long explanation and probably don’t even call it EFT. Often, we’ll ask them to think of a time when they were feeling anxious or stressed. We don’t talk about food at that point. We don’t labour it – usually, you can see if it’s working in a few minutes. If their score stayed the same, we’d ask them more questions to make sure they’d been able to tune into the issue. We wouldn’t take people onto our weight management programme if we didn’t think it would make a difference.” It helped Louise Diss, Managing Director of TOAST, the Obesity Awareness and Solutions Trust (www.toast-uk.org). She’d read about EFT but “didn’t understand how it worked.” With Elaine’s help, Louise learned how to use the technique herself. She says, “I started off changing the way I thought about it. How I felt about myself and dieting. That was very stuck, feeling like a failure all the time and that sort of thing. I was hoping to change the way I viewed myself because of my size. The EFT very quickly got to an issue that I hadn’t realised was an issue. I’d done a low cal diet years ago and each time I put on a few pounds, I went back on it. But during the EFT process, I threw it all out. I realised I had a lot of anger towards the food packs and towards the organisation I’d lost weight with.” Louise credits EFT with helping her shift the anger she’d internalised towards the situation. “I started working on solutions to the real issue. Anger and eating the anger. EFT helped me to stop starting a diet every Monday and failing every Tuesday. It was a huge turning point in that I stopped binging. The ease I felt in myself that I wasn’t a success or a failure based on my size.” One of the elements of EFT is the use of the phrase that in spite of the issue, “I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” Louise said that this phrase helped her to start accepting herself. “I had about 5 or 6 sessions. I still use the actual techniques sometimes.” Whether you believe in meridian points and energy healing or not, Louise says, “At it’s most simple level EFT is a distraction.” So, even if you think it won’t work for your craving or addiction, taking the time out to tap helps you refocus on how you want your situation to be. This in itself is very healing.

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ANLP DEVELOPMENT

Why should I be an Accredited Trainer with ANLP? By David Lincoln ANLP Accreditation Team

have been a trainer of NLP for many years and have run so many Practitioners and Master Practitioner programmes that I can not remember them all, so why do I need accreditation? This is a common response to the new accreditation procedure for trainers instigated by ANLP. The procedure looks very complicated, is another cry. So what is it all about? Why do trainers need accrediting anyway? Who will accredit us? What authority do they have to judge us... etc etc. This short article is to give not only trainers but also the general public and other NLP people an understanding of the thinking and philosophy behind ANLP Trainer’s Accreditation. First and foremost, as I am sure all our readers know, ANLP takes a stand on quality and consistency in all its dealings with the NLP community in order to achieve its mission statement, which is to enable Practitioners to deliver NLP in a professional, responsible and congruent way. To this end ANLP has set certain standards that Practitioners and Master Practitioners can adhere to if they want ANLP recognition by the accredited membership route. These standards have been produced following considerable consultation within the NLP community and the resulting standards are a level that encompasses all the major training organisations methodologies. This means that the term accredited member will have considerable meaning to the public as it conﬁrms that the member has achieved a

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certain level of training. It therefore follows that the trainers should also be accredited and that their trainees will be known to have reached the minimum standards for ANLP accreditation. The trainers accreditation procedure, although it appears to be quite onerous is, in fact, only designed to satisfy ANLP that the trainer trains to at least, the minimum standards. In many of the earlier applications the applicants were well known people in the NLP community and as such the accreditation process was minimal, others were either not so well known or were new trainers recently qualified. Some trainers who have been training for many years have no longer got access to their original certificates and some do not even have any certificates, as when they started NLP there was no such thing. ANLP has accreditation procedures that cover all these scenarios as well as the newly qualified. As to the former, the easiest way is for a member of the Accreditation Team to visit the trainers training to satisfy themselves as to the ability of the trainer to train. After all at the end of the day that is what the Accreditation Team are looking for: The ability to teach the basic syllabus in a manner that teaches what actually works, as well as ensure that a trainer is delivering NLP training in line with the ANLP Code of Ethics. To ascertain this, all Accredited Trainers submit their course materials and promotional literature to the Accreditation Team for review.

The Accreditation process is done in the full spirit of the Presuppositions of NLP i.e. ‘no failure, only feedback’. To this end the worst is that the applicant is tasked before the standard of Accredited Trainer is conferred. Even a new trainer, providing their certiﬁcation is in order and references are sound, can be granted provisional status with a review after they have actually delivered a training. There have been a number of criticisms hurled at us such as “who are you to judge” and “who is the deﬁnitive arbitrary of quality” etc. But notwithstanding these critics ANLP are dedicated to set standards and criteria that the public will trust. ANLP model similar peer reviewed and run organisations such as The BMA, a private company and sole arbitrator for medical doctors. The models that ANLP are following create a true peer lead group to set standards for the development of NLP in all areas of life, business, therapy, education and personal development. As with many other organisations there are, and will be critics, and ANLP welcomes all feedback, which is then taken on board. If you want to discuss accreditation further or need help with an application please e-mail admin@anlp.org for help and advice. David can be contacted on psychologist@therapist.net.

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NLP

More secrets from Bob Proctor and Dr John Demartini by Eve Menezes Cunningham

f you’ve seen The Secret, you’ll remember Bob Proctor and Dr John Demartini. I recently heard both of them sharing more tips for creating the life you dream of at a social entrepreneurship event, Akasha. Bob is 73. He remembers, as a very young man, “spending every morning worrying about being ﬁred from a job I hated working for someone I didn’t like. I couldn’t see how I was going to get out of debt when I earned so little. I was losing. I was going in the wrong direction and picking up speed.” When Bob started working closely with people like Napoleon Hill, he soaked up as much as he could and transformed things. Now he says, “You can make an enormous leap just like that. Try another approach. Do something dramatically different. I believe that, at essence, you are perfect. There’s something within us that wants to grow. Regardless of how well you’re doing, you could do better. Think.” Not thinking, according to Bob, is key to staying stuck. He remembers doing stupid things as a child and going round in circles with his parents and other adults: They’d say: “Why did you do that?” He’d say: “I don’t know.” They’d say: “What do you mean you don’t know? You know better.” He’d say: “I know.” They’d say: “So why are you doing it?” And he’d wail: “I don’t know.” To change, Bob says, “We’ve got to understand why we do things.” He remembers realising that different people have different ways of doing things when someone close to him ate a turnip the opposite way to him. One of them thought eating the root was the way to go and the pigs would get the leaves. The other ate the greens and gave the pigs the root. This revelation got Bob wondering, “How many other things am I doing that were decided way back by other people? What foot do you put in your pants ﬁrst? Why do you do it that way? Because as a little kid, your mother [or other primary care giver] said ‘put your foot in here. Not that foot, the other foot!’ When you start to understand how and when you’re being controlled, you have choices.” Another early lesson he got was about focus. One of his mentors was an extremely successful man who always seemed to have lots of time to enjoy life. Bob asked how he’d mastered time. The mentor laughed, “You can’t master time. You master activities. You sit down at night, list the

things you want to do the next day and you do them.” Bob says, “I have all kinds of projects on the go at any one time but I only focus on one at a time. We’ve been taught to go to work to earn money. That’s the worst way to earn money. We should go to work for satisfaction. You have to have a purpose, a vision and a goal. The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. Happiness has to do with awareness. If you’re not enjoying life now, you’re probably not going to enjoy life. Find out what you love to do and dedicate your life to it.” But this is just one part of attraction. Bob says, “I have never seen anyone do anything of any consequence on their own. Get a coach. Attract a team. I don’t want to spend a lot of time with anyone who’s not moving in the right direction. “You’re a spiritual being but you’re living in a physical body. You choose your thoughts and your thoughts create your feelings. The only things you can attract to you are the things that vibrate in harmony with you. Most people are extras in their own movie. Know where you are going and know that you are going to get there.” You may remember from The Secret that Dr John Demartini was told that he had learning difﬁculties at school. Now he communicates so well that he gives speeches around the world 360 days a year. This sounds like hard work to me but John says, “When you love what you do, every day’s a vacation. Doing what you love and loving what you do is great for you.” John talked about the way a black and white spinning top looks grey when it’s spinning and compared this to it being at a higher vibrational level. When it slows down and gravity takes over, it’s clearly black and white. John says when you play small, “you’re identifying yourself with a gravitational structure instead of universal radiations. If you have a small vision you have a small life. If you have a vast vision, you have a vast life. If our consciousness expands so does our net worth. As we are able to conceive more we can create more. If you want to make a difference in yourself you need to have a vision at least as big as your family.” In NLP, we’re used to checking out the ecology of any goal but John wants you to take it beyond how things will affect your family. He says, “As our goals get bigger, our vision should, too.” According to John, “to make a difference for your family, your vision needs to be at least as big your community.” If your goal is for your community, your vision should be as big as your city, your country, the planet and so on. John says, “If your frequencies are vast and very high, your thinking is global. If you set

Most people are extras in their own movie

When you love what you do, every day’s a vacation

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NLP

a goal to run a mile, when you get to that mile, you’re sweating. If you set a goal of ten miles, when you get to one mile you’re not sweating because your goal is much bigger.” He also stresses the need to examine our values. He gave the example of a man who wanted “to be a success”. When John kept asking him what areas he was currently successful in, he was so used to thinking of himself as a failure – and reinforcing that reality – that it took a while before he acknowledged his success as a husband and father. More probing made it clear that the people he saw as financial successes had lost much more. Subconsciously, he was equating financial success with misery. He was repelling it. John says, “The hierarchy of your values dictates your destiny. Write down 100 reasons why reaching your goal will benefit you and your family. Associating with reasons for wealth will help you shift your hierarchy of values. When you’ve got a big enough reason for doing something, you’ll do it. If someone’s having to get you up in the morning to fulfil your goals, they’re not your goals.” John agrees with Bob about spending time with amazing, inspirational people. If you don’t yet know any personally, go to hear them speak or read about them. John says, “You can’t stick your hand in a pot of glue without some of it sticking.” Getting into a state of gratitude and staying in it is essential for attracting good things. John says, “When you’re grateful for what you’ve got you get more to be grateful for. Nothing is ever missing. It’s just in a form right now that eludes you. You first have to realise that nothing is missing and that you’re manifesting everything. Anytime you want to change yourself to be more like someone you admire or change someone else because you think they’re wrong, you’re in ingratitude and your heart is shut down. “When we’re ungrateful for who we are or for who someone else is, we’re uninspired. The power to create an inspired life is in the present. You can’t do it when you’re trying to force yourself or someone else to change. Your vision is infinitely clear when you’re authentic with yourself. Love is the basis of this entire universe and when we’re grateful, we access that. Whatever you’ve done or not done, know that you are worthy of love.” For more information about Bob Proctor, visit www.bobproctor.com For more information about Dr John Demartini, visit www.drdemartini.com For more information about The Secret, visit http://thesecret.tv/ For more information about Akasha, visit www.triumphantevents.co.uk

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BUSINESS

Forty Seconds to Success First Impressions Matter! by Julia Rennie

e are all bombarded by so much sensory input each second that our unconscious mind protects us from overload by sorting, deleting, and generalising the incoming information. And then of course we respond in accordance with our individual past experiences, memories, associations and learnings. It’s no wonder that two people at the same party can have vastly differing experiences of and reactions to the same event! Research shows that the impression we make upon each other during the first four minutes of an encounter is largely based on non-verbal communication. It seems that around 55% of the 40 or so unconscious assessments we make in the first four minutes are based on how the other person looks, 38% on how they sound, and only around 7% on what they actually say. This might explain why we may find it difficult to catch someone’s name when they are introduced – we’re too busy taking in the nonverbal information. Even more tellingly, studies indicate that in 90% of cases in which an applicant doesn’t get the job, the interviewer makes his or her decision in the first 40 seconds! So, if the first 40 seconds are so vital, what can we do to make the most of them? We live in a telegenic society in which we are accustomed to forming opinions about people based largely on our perceptions of their photos appearing in the media. In terms of processing the information we receive, it’s said that 40% of us favour the visual sense (how it looks), 40% favour the kinaesthetic (how it feels), and only 20% the auditory (how it sounds). How we enter a room, our posture and the way we move, our facial expression and smile, our clothing, shoes and hair, our energy

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state, handshake, and our voice will give approximately 40 clues to that new client / interviewer. He or she will form lightning subconscious assessments of our credibility, integrity, confidence, professionalism, appropriateness for the role, intelligence, emotional state, overall health, and even our income level! What do you want your appearance to say about you? Before setting off for that all-important meeting with your prospective client, consider how you’d like be perceived. Think of a key attribute or resource, such as confidence, professionalism, or approachability; there are many to choose from, so pick one that is really appropriate for your circumstances. If you were to meet such a person, how would you know that he or she was, say, professional? What would someone with this attribute look like? How would he or she sound? What sort of feeling would he or she be expressing? Now imagine it again in more detail, placing it within your specific context. Then think of a time when you met someone who didn’t meet your expectations in terms of expressing this attribute. Remember how you felt then. What was going on that was contributing to your discomfort? Identify exactly what tipped you off. This should give you some preliminary ideas as to how you want to present yourself. Now let’s take it further... Dress for the job you want, not the job you have The power of the visual sense really came home to me when I was interviewing candidates for

a job as a nanny for my two small children. An immaculate woman turned up: pristine navy suit, crisp white shirt, sheer tights, high heels – the lot. My first and deciding thought was that this woman would not be at home running about in the park, intervening in food fights, changing nappies, and getting down to all the grubby things that go along with babies! She looked as though she’d be much happier in a stylish office! Was I wrong? Maybe way off the mark – but I didn’t hire her! Rapport is the foundation for any successful relationship. How does this apply with regard to your appearance? Think about the business niche you are targeting. Whether you’re pitching for new business or approaching a new career, it pays to check out the ‘culture’. It’s worth waiting outside an office at the start or end of the day to see how the people look and how they conduct themselves. Generally speaking, sales, marketing, advertising and the media are higher energy and employ a more relaxed dress code than the professions. Your unique brand Your appearance will establish your personal brand within the business you are targeting. Think about any changes you might make to your appearance that will enable you to remain congruent with your own brand while also being appropriate for the corporate brand of your target business. Accessories provide an easy way to establish your individual identity and style. Spend time and thought on those accessories on which you might spend money, such as watches, jewellery, pens, wallets, phones, laptops, handbags, workbags, and scarves. Think about your hair, makeup, and general grooming.

BUSINESS

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BUSINESS

Some years ago I was coaching a corporate client whose goals included becoming a CEO of a FTSE 200 company. An engaging, intelligent, capable man who was already working in a high proﬁle company, he felt that his colleagues underrated his potential, perceiving him to be careless. As we were talking, I noticed that he wasn’t wearing socks. When I commented on this, he replied, ‘Oh, I never notice those sort of details. But what he wore – or didn’t wear – was signiﬁcant in contributing to how he was perceived! When he began wearing clothes that were congruent with his own kinaesthetic style but also suitable for his workplace – unstructured suits, soft shirts, cuff links, and, yes, socks! – he found himself being headhunted three times in 18 months. He still scoffs at what he feels is a ‘ridiculous preoccupation with what people look like’ but nonetheless acknowledges that changing his appearance has helped him to achieve his objectives. He’s a great example of a kinaesthetically-oriented person who has achieved good results by taking into account the requirements of a visually-oriented world!

• the lighter the colour the more relaxed • the brighter the colour, the more ﬂamboyant • the softer the colour, the more approachable Even in the City of London, where black, grey and navy are the normal suit colours, there is still the opportunity to express individuality with shirts, ties, scarves and socks.

Your appearance will establish your personal brand within the business you are targeting

Colour psychology The ﬁrst thing the eye registers is colour. Different colours trigger different associations: see how many of these you agree with. Red is commonly perceived as conﬁdent, assertive, aggressive and positive. Yellow is associated with happiness, joy, energy and movement. Pink is about universal love, approachability, friendship. Purple is important, imperial, regal, and religious. Green is harmonious, grounding, natural, and neutral. Blue is conservative, safe, natural and normal. White is virginal, remote, safe, and accepting. Grey is conservative, introspective, neutral and safe. Brown is associated with harmony, nature, safety and relaxation. Black is professional, important and regal. Generally speaking: • the darker the colour the more formal

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Dress for the body you have, not the body you want Although we are all unique, male and female bodies come in a few basic body shapes. This has nothing to do with your weight; it’s your overall outline. For women there is a wide range of shapes, from the curves of Dolly Parton and Marilyn Monroe through to the long slender limbs of Grace Jones. To make it easy, think of whether you are more curvy or more columnshaped. Curvy shapes look better in soft fabrics that drape well, with less structured jackets, skirts and trousers. If you want to wear patterns, choose abstract designs and florals, and avoid anything geometric. Straighter shapes look best in crisp fabrics, with welldefined jackets, skirts and trousers. As for patterns: diagonals, pinstripes, diamonds and anything with lines all look good. For men there are three basic body shapes. Angular chaps, in whom the chest measurement is 7” wider than the waist, look good in crisp fabrics and well-defined, fitted clothes; pinstripes and

checks work well, along with geometric patterns for ties. Straight-shapes, where the chest measurement is 5” wider than the waist, look best in boxy jackets and slightly softer fabrics; shirts either plain or with a ﬁne stripe; and ties with a regular pattern or woven silk. Contoured shapes have similar chest and waist measurements; they look good in unstructured jackets in soft fabrics, with plain coloured shirts and ties of an abstract or circular pattern. Don’t leave home without your socks! If the key to ensuring that you make best use of those crucial ﬁrst four minutes is in the delicate balance of tailoring your appearance to the context while still maintaining your own personal style and integrity, perhaps the real moral of the tale is this: don’t leave home without your socks! Julia Rennie has been offering multidisciplinary training, including NLP, psychometrics and high-level coaching (International Coaching Federation PCC), to the international business world for 15 years. For more details visit www.themind business.co.uk

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TRAINING & WORKSHOPS

PPD Learning one of the world’s great NLP Training Institutes by Judith Lowe

’ve been kindly invited by Rapport to tell you about my NLP company, why I think we’re so special and what I hope we are contributing to the evolution of NLP as a significant international field. I also want to offer some descriptions of present and future possibilities, as NLP continues to grow, here in the UK, and become more mainstream. PPD Learning has a great, world-wide reputation – primarily for high standards, innovation and integrity. We’ve been around in London for nearly 20 years (historically, as five successive companies) endorsed and encouraged by John Grinder – who co-signs our certificates. We have hugely enjoyed training thousands of people in NLP, many of whom over the years, are now themselves NLP trainers. The ‘Pace - PPD Learning’ alumni form quite a core of the NLP community here in the UK and our influence reaches into far corners of the globe! In a field in which it’s the quality and experience of the training team which matters the most, we have one of the most stunning line-ups of guest trainers/colleagues – including Robert Dilts, Judy DeLozier, Charles Faulkner

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and Joseph O’ Connor – all world-class innovators in their own right. We also have wonderful, long term friends and partnerships in many related aspects of NLP - conferences, journals, bookstores, other institutes, universities, associations and training bodies - and as ‘senior’ NLPers we of course also encourage newcomers, new ideas and love to make new friends along the way – truly, building a ﬁeld. However, its not just longevity in the market place and amazing teachers that build a training organisation. It has to be what I think is our very special ethos - an absolute dedication to our students, an ongoing development and evolution of the most integrated kind of leading-edge NLP and.. well, a real sense of ﬂair, fun and community in our daily practice. NLP is about how we learn and the underlying principles of change and transformation in action in our lives. People can forget that its not the techniques in themselves that ‘work’ in NLP – it’s the skills and attitudes of the coach/practitioner that will always make the difference. And skill takes time to acquire and deepen so that it’s ‘in the muscle’. And working with integrity requires a more systemic approach to relationship, and to ourselves. What matters to me is that the people who come to us for training, not only leave with the amazing, practical NLP ‘toolbox’, but experience a deeper sense of expansion of their own capacity and their sense of ‘being’. I want our students to ‘get’ how unique and extraordinary they are, and to sense how they might uniquely grow and learn in their lives, becoming more integrated and alive. Our programmes are a lot of fun too. I’m often asked ‘Are all your groups like this? We all

get on so well and feel like we’ve been friends for ages!’ Learning NLP is a fundamentally social and interactive process. It’s important that people feel welcome and supported, and this is always an explicit part of how we create our ‘group dynamic’ and learning community. I also like to provide excitement and challenge for people; risks to take, new territory to explore, surprising adventures and discoveries along the way – a real hero’s journey! Creating different kinds of experiences to expand a person’s sense of what’s really possible for them, ‘waking them up’ to their potential, is a fantastic challenge for me and my teams. Lots of thrills along the way, and lots of laughter! I love teaching and have a fairly entertaining and engaging style. I particularly like to work interactively and spontaneously with a group bringing out the best in all of us in the moment and creating something new and potent between us. Our intensive 21 day Practitioner has a depth

Look outward to the wider ﬁeld of achievement and good practice rather than to one ‘guru’ or a kind of ‘menu’ of techniques and a range which you would expect from a course that’s been evolving in a dynamic ﬁeld for 20 years! It incorporates not only the ‘best’ of Bandler and Grinder, Dilts and Delozier (‘Classic’ , ‘New Code’ and ‘Systemic NLP’), but also many other contributions and innovations from the ‘larger mind’ of NLP. I think particularly here of Charles Faulkner, David Gordon, Chris Hall, the Andreases,

TRAINING & WORKSHOPS

Lara Ewing, Steve Gilligan, and of my own research, ideas, experiences and developments over twenty-ish years of training. I’m also fascinated by many current developments in the ‘embodied mind’ research, cognitive linguistics, neuroscience, the ‘multiple intelligences’ model and the ‘positive psychology’ movement. I passionately encourage those of you who are new to NLP Training, as trainers, to take a rich, multi-source approach to the overall goals and design of your courses. Look outward to the wider ﬁeld of achievement and good practice rather than to one ‘guru’ or a kind of ‘menu’ of techniques. Some programmes, even today, also utilise outdated and ‘unecological’ metaphors of ‘control’ and ‘instant results’ and hope to rush people through a kind of NLP-lite course in which they have no chance of acquiring depth of skill or understanding. NLP is the result of deeply, generative collaborations and contributions over time and no one description is the ‘real thing’. In fact the richness is created by multiple descriptions and possibilities – based on core principles and integrated behavioral, cognitive and somatic skills, which can be incorporated into the training in lively and experiential ways. Meanwhile, our Masters programme is, in my view, positively a work of art! By this I mean it’s a multi-level, multi-stranded, utterly

enthralling and integrated learning journey. Sally Vanson from the Performance Solution calls it ‘A truly inspiring Meta-Master Training and beyond.’ Spread over six modules in six months and with four trainers (myself, Robert Dilts, Judy DeLozier, and Charles Faulkner) I believe it stands alone as an extraordinary and uniquely enriching experience for personal and professional evolution and achievement. Even our coaching team includes six or seven UK NLP trainers and at least another two with the new Msc/MA in NLP and we are joined by practitioners from many different trainings and parts of the world. Our ‘Passion in Action’ - Social Change

with NLP is our very special, unique, groundbreaking, annual seminar – me with Judy Delozier – offered at ‘not-for-profit’ fees (some bursaries too) for people who want to make a difference with their NLP, and there are lots of you out there! Also we have some very interesting ‘In House’ Business products and a fun PPDL Practice Group meeting monthly in central London to which all Rapport readers are warmly invited. I heartily welcome all the other training organisations in the field and support everyone who is out there using their NLP with wisdom and sensitivity. The more the merrier! Our modern world is facing many challenges, ecological, social and political, which are played out through our individual lives and conditions. There are many kinds of fundamentalism in which the ‘map’ is ‘the territory – and we can find ourselves, with the best of intentions, caught up in those too. Together, in our wider NLP commmunity, we have the possibility to become an influential field that’s contributing to the expansion of human potential into a positive human future. And my hope is that my company, PPD Learning can offer, at least, some of the leadership and inspiration for this larger, vital project. Judith Lowe is MD and Principal Trainer for PPD Learning Ltd. For further info see www.ppdlearning. co.uk or call 0870 7744 321

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DIARY

Diary of Events for Autumn / Winter 2007 October 07 Free Sampler Event - bite size chunks of NLP- LAB & the Enneagram 4th October 2007 The Sanctuary- Nr Guildford- Surrey Grahame C Morgan-Watson 01403-823283 info@metame.co.uk Hypnosis for Everyday Life 4th October 2007 NLP Academy Training Centre- South Croydon- Surrey Michael Carroll 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk

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NLP Master Practitioner 14th October 2007 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com

Essential Coaching Skills 17th October 2007 Stratford- East London Ralph Watson 0208 257 4498 nlp@newham.ac.uk

Master practitioner - Hypnosis 25th October 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com

NLP Personal Enhancement Day 14th October 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com

Women of Courage 20th October 2007 Central London- The Drill Hall- 16 Chenies St off Tottenham Court Rd Sharon Eden 0208 597 9200 sharon.eden@womenofcourage.co.uk

Fast-Track NLP Practitioner - Module 2 27th October 2007 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

How to Motivate yourselfs and Others !! Free Seminar 24th October 2007 Harrogate Yorkshire The White Hart Hotel Parking is Free at the Hotel for course attendees Sonia Marie Saxton 07932 637197 smesaxton@saxtonpartners.co.uk

Metaphors and ButterďŹ&#x201A;ies 27th October 2007 NLP Academy Training Centre- South Croydon- Surrey 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk

INLPTA Diploma 14th October 2007 Stratford- East London Ralph Watson 0208 257 4498 nlp@newham.ac.uk

DIARY

Time Line Therapy® Practitioner 28th October 2007 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

November 07 Introduction to NLP (Scotland) 2nd November 2007 Glasgow- Scotland Jeffrey Goodwin 0870 060 1549 jeff@nlpscotland.com Linguistic Wizardry 3rd November 2007 Glasgow- Scotland Jeffrey Goodwin 0870 060 1549 jeff@nlpscotland.com NLP Practitioner 3rd November 2007 Glasgow- Scotland Jeffrey Goodwin 0870 060 1549 jeff@nlpscotland.com Healing with Hypnosis 3rd November 2007 NLP Academy Training Centre- South Croydon- Surrey 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk NLP Practitioner training 4th November 2007 York- UK Susanna Bellini 01904 636216 s.bellini@bronze-dragon.com Practitioner foundation 6th November 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com Master practitioner - presenting impact 8th November 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com

Nibble of NLP 8th November 2007 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com

The Mythogenic Self Experience 25th November 2007 Kingston upon Thames Charles Moore 44-20-8974-8974 cmoore@generativenlp.com

Free Taster Evening 7th December 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com

NLP Diploma 9th November 2007 Redditch Ralph Watson 01527 585310 info@thelearningpath.co.uk

MSc in Organisation Development and NLT 27th November 2007 UK Sally Vanson 01249 700290 sally@theperformancesolution.com

A Nibble of NLP 7th December 2007 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com

INLPTA Diploma 11th November 2007 South Wales Ralph Watson 2920862647 info@aspire2change.com

December 07

ANLP Trainers Play Day 8th December 2007 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 0870 444 0790 melody@gwiztraining.com

NLP Practitioner Training 16th November 2007 Chelmsford Essex Denise Collins 01245 476376 info@know-more-training.co.uk Revolve the Issues - Dissolve the fact workshop 16th November 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com NLP Conference 17th November 2007 Regents College- Regents ParkLondon Jo Hogg 01270 620333 jo@nlpconference.co.uk Accelerated NLP Master Practitioner Certiﬁcation 19th November 2007 London Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@inﬁniteexcellence.com Enneagram Discovery Day - direct experience 23th November 2007 LONDON- Crown HouseHammersmith Grahame C Morgan-Watson 01403-823283 info@metame.co.uk

Words That Change Minds - LAB Proﬁle practitioner certiﬁcation 1st December 2007 The Sanctuary- Nr Guildford- Surrey Grahame C Morgan-Watson 01403-823283 info@metame.co.uk NLP Master Practitioner Training 2nd December 2007 York - UK Susanna Bellini 01904 636216 info@bronze-dragon.com NLP DIPLOMA COURSE 2nd December 2007 Stratford- East London Ralph Watson 01788 576626 ralph@dynamic-communication.com Leadership Master Class 4th December 2007 Stratford- East London Ralph Watson 0208 257 4498 nlp@newham.ac.uk

Attraction and Charisma Day 9th December 2007 Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com ACCELERATED NLP Practitioner Certification 10th December 2007 London Infinite Excellence - Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@infiniteexcellence.com Introduction to NLP 16th December 2007 London Helen Drake 0208 995 2864 helen@pointtaken.com

Taster London 6th December 2007 London Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com NLP Coaching Supervision 6th December 2007 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com

To get your workshops and events listed in Rapport, log in as a member to www.anlp.org and enter your events into the online diary. Every issue, online events listed for the next 3 months will be included in Rapport. rapport - Autumn 2007

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��

UKCP Accreditation Pathway t Are you interested in becoming a UKCP Accredited Psychotherapist? t Are you interested in adding to your portfolio of skills as a therapist? t Would you like your CPD to be counted towards Accreditation? Awaken School is a Member Organisation of UKCP and currently provides training for students who are working towards UKCP accreditation. This 4 year academic pathway, in addition to your vocational supervision and client contact hours, will provide the necessary expertise to take your practice to the next level. Courses are available as stand alone or as a full pathway.

t Practitioner in NLP (Psychotherapy) t Master Practitioner in NLP (Psychotherapy) t Foundation in Clinical Hypnotherapy t Intermediate in Clinical Hypnotherapy t Cognative Behavioural Therapy Students who may have already taken suitable training may be eligible for APL. Such requests are treated on a case by case basis. Please contact the ofﬁce for further information.

MSc in Psychotherapy Are you interested in a MSc in Psychotherapy? Awaken School are teaming up with a University to develop a pathway to a MSc in psychotherapy. To express interest in the programme, please contact the ofﬁce on the number below. Awaken House 14 Roseberry Court Stokesley, MiddlesbroughTS9 5QT Tel: 01642 714702, Mobile: 07929 170088 Email: awakenschool@aol.com Website: www.hypnotherapy-training.co.uk

BOOK REVIEWS

rapport book review Emotionally Intelligent Living Geetu Bharwaney £12.99, Crown House Having no previous knowledge of Emotional Intelligence, this publication provided me with an excellent introduction. The well-designed layout and clear definitions provide a pleasurable and easy to understand read. I particularly enjoyed the chapter ‘Underpinning Science’ which provides a good integration of scientific research backing up the findings upon which EI is based. I found the section relating to different schools of emotional intelligence slightly controversial as there was considerable personal opinion from the author. From an NLP viewpoint, I experienced some conflict with a few questions raised in the section ‘measuring your emotional intelligence’ as they tended to involve mind-reading. However, for an individual who is not familiar with NLP,

they take the reader outside the ‘box’ and encourage taking on other perspectives. For those who need some experience identifying their emotions, the ‘feelings assessment’ and additional exercises prove very useful. Although at ﬁrst glance they could potentially appear basic, their structure is profoundly powerful. The second half of the book is divided very nicely into short sections with a clear distinction between personal and career areas of life. This book deﬁnitely requires a willingness to work through each of the exercises to get maximum results. Much of the work in Geetu’s book could be considered important for bringing into consciousness emotions in relation to all areas of your life. Jessica Cundey, Book Review Panel

Leadership and Motivation John Adair £12.99, Kogan Page In the ﬁrst two parts of this book the author offers a review of some of the work done by Maslow and Herzberg, and he then goes on to expound a new theory of his own. I found it interesting to have the background information about where the ideas and thoughts come from, but for me the third part of the book was of most interest. This gives clear, concise pointers about putting theory into practice. Adair’s 8 principles of motivation give “practical ways in which you can better motivate yourself and others.” It took me a

while to get into the style of the book, because on one hand the theory is not at a deep level, and yet at the same time it seems more than one normally comes across in shorter, more practical works. However, having been “given permission” by the author to skip what I didn’t want, I made rapid progress to the parts I was most interested in. It was good to consider how the individual’s needs might affect his motivational drive, and the practical tips were well worth thinking about. Yvonne Johnson, Book Review Panel

“One of the forem ost thinkers on leade rship” Sir John Harvey-Jon

LEADERSHIP AND

MOTIVATION The fifty-fifty rule and the eight key principles of motiva ting others

JOHN ADAIR

Self Hypnosis for Cosmic Consciousness Ronald A Havens PhD £16.99, Crown House An interesting look at hypnosis to view altered, or what Ronald A Havens classes as cosmic states. The author justiﬁed his choice of words on a regular basis, which was a little off putting, yet his comparison of the conscious mind being “like a ten-story bank of television sets” really struck a cord with me. I do feel that the reader needs some understanding or experience of hypnosis and energies to get the best out of this book. I found the authors views on the conscious mind and unconscious mind very easy to understand and enjoyed his descriptions of the feelings of oneness during these cosmic consciousness

states and how they can be used to help clients in a very practical way. He has included some experiences that his clients have had and how it’s helped them. The hypnosis scripts at the end of the book were intriguing and I could see how you could personalise them, although you would need to either put them down on a tape/CD for self hypnosis or enlist someone to read them for you. On the whole an interesting read for anyone wishing to have a down to earth look at the conscious and unconscious mind and looking at alternative language to achieve altered states. Julie Pearce, Book Review Panel

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AUTHOR INTERVIEW

[NLP] made so much sense. All the rapport building was absolutely crucial to get a good coaching relationship right from the start

Want to ﬁnd your niche? Hannah says: • Go back to your clients and ask them, if they had to describe you to someone else, what are the kinds of things that they’d be saying? If we were in a corporate environment, we’d call this market research. • Understand what your market wants and the kind of experience they’re looking for to know where you’re going to ﬁnd it easiest to promote yourself. • Set the kind of fee that you deserve. • Get out your CV. Have a look at it and just remind yourself of all the fantastic things you’ve done so far and get feedback and testimonials from other people.

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AUTHOR INTERVIEW

Hannah McNamara by Eve Menezes Cunningham

annah McNamara says she started coaching “about 3 years ago. But I’d been using a lot of coaching techniques as a manager for a long time before then. When I did a little bit of NLP as part of my coaching course, it made so much sense. All the rapport building was absolutely crucial to get a good coaching relationship right from the start. It was also interesting to see that there were certain things that I was doing naturally anyway.” Her history with marketing is much longer. Hannah says, “Some people would say I’ve always been in marketing. I actually started off from the age of about 16, doing a Business Studies A Level. My grandfather had had an advertising agency for years and he set up an international network of agencies. He was still travelling into the City well into his 80s. But unfortunately, he died when I was 18 so never got to see that I’d kind of carried on the family tradition. When I ﬁnished my A Levels, I did a Business Studies degree and specialised in all the marketing options. “I was into heavy metal music at the time so set up the Rock Society at my university. We put on loads of social events and had a newsletter that I was sending out. Back in those days, there was no email so it was a case of photocopying all the newsletters, putting the stamps on and getting them sent out. “My ﬁrst exhibition stand was at Freshers’ Fair. We did all sorts of silly things. We got a rubber chicken and cut the head off so we could look really hard. Fake blood, yes. And we found that giving away sweets worked. That got a lot of people to our stand. So you can see, I have been marketing for a while. “Just getting out there and talking to people is one of the things that has been really valuable since I’ve been in business for myself. When I graduated, I went into a marketing role straight away. It was a really good training ground for everything. “When I started my coaching business I took a part time job in a furniture shop. That was really to brush up on my sales techniques because I felt a bit rusty. I thought I needed to get out there talking to people and get used to selling again. It’s much easier doing that with

somebody else’s product. And with furniture, they can see it. They can sit on it. They can imagine what it’s like to have their dinner around the table. I remember one family came in and they sat everybody around the table just to see if they’d have enough elbow room. Talk about giving people the chance to try something out before they buy! “The same principle goes through to personal development and getting clients. You need to give people a bit of a sample of what you offer. Running things like workshops and events are a great way for people to sit around that dining room table and see if they like it.” Hannah’s marketing experience led to clients “right from the start. People within personal development who didn’t come from a business or marketing background were saying to me, ‘You’ve got all this fantastic experience. Would you be my coach? Would you be my mentor?’ “I did go through a process of thinking, ‘That’s the old me. I’m this new person’ so I tried other things as well. But I kept coming back to the marketing. It’s also where I had credibility. People were looking for some sort of experience and for me to empathise with what they were going through.” Hannah says that nicheing is important because people are “so busy these days that if they meet somebody who can help them on anything, their minds just go blank. They don’t have the time to think about what they actually want. When I was in my corporate life, the last thing I ever wanted to do when I was outside work was to think about what I wanted from my job or anything like that. Unless you can lay it out to them and say: ‘This is what I offer. Which of these particular services would suit you best?’ they just haven’t got the time to ﬁgure it out for themselves. “Nicheing also means that you’re understanding the kind of person that you’re targeting. You can use all the right sort of language with them and create rapport through marketing without even having to speak to anyone. It’s also very valuable having a niche on the internet because when people are searching for particular key words, they’ll ﬁnd you. “When someone arrives on your site they need to feel ‘this is for me.’ The look of the

site has to be right for them. The right sort of imagery, the right feeling, the right language. Language is very important with internet marketing. For example, a professional services firm like a law firm doesn’t like to talk about sales and marketing. The phrase they use is ‘business development’. So if you’re putting a site or any marketing materials together for them and you keep talking about sales and marketing it’s a big turn off. “Often, the skills that you have and that you want to distance yourself from are exactly the skills that clients are looking for. I do meet a lot of people who are all fired up from the training courses saying ‘I’ve been a teacher all my life’ or ‘I’ve been a nurse or a this or a that and I want to coach chief executives of large plcs.’ Whilst they are probably excellent coaches, they’re competing with people who’ve been chief executives themselves. “Clients want to hear that someone has been able to get beyond the same pressures and do something different. You might end up moving people out of their jobs but it doesn’t have to be that way. It can be about helping people to create the emotional distance they need in their work, building their confidence in tackling issues as they arise, making them more commercially aware or something like that. Don’t ever discount the experience that you’ve got. Your life didn’t start the day you went on the training course. You’ve got all this experience but often people ignore it. “I don’t think anybody ever stops coaching once they’ve started. I want to get out to as many people as possible. I’m looking into other ways of serving clients. Workshops, books and audio materials are all different ways that you can serve clients without having to do one to ones all the time. Not everybody can afford the one to one support when they really need it so offering clients a range of services like that is also a good way to build a business because then you’re not just selling your time.” For more information and to buy Hannah’s book, visit www.nichemarketingforcoaches.com And for articles, tutorials, interviews, a community area and a special trial offer, visit www.marketinghelpforcoaches.com

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PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT

Publishing: A Dangerous Business By Mindy Gibbins-Klein

t’s become very trendy to get published. Nearly every day I get an email from some supposed guru, urging me to publish for proﬁt, create podcasts and videos, or submit articles. The promise of a passive income stream and an instant reputation as an expert always sound very tempting indeed, and I think I even alluded to them in the last issue! There’s nothing wrong with wanting fame and fortune; in fact, it’s precisely those goals that have kept our society moving forward instead of backward for centuries. What I do worry about is people producing masses of printed material for the wrong reasons that could go out at the wrong time, in the wrong format and to the wrong people. Warning: There are quite a few negatives and embedded commands in the following

use the services of a professional editor. I don’t care how pushed for time you think you are or how much money you are trying to save, failing to get your work edited will almost certainly reﬂect badly on you. Vague, boring and contradictory material. This has usually been because the author has not thought through his/her point of view and therefore is unable to articulate it in an intelligent way. As coaches and practitioners, we need our written material to be our spokesperson and to do the sales job for us in many cases. So what do you think of someone who can’t put their thoughts together on the page? Do you think they would be able to help someone sort through an issue or outline new ideas when face-to-face? Probably not. Publishing and posting from an extreme emotional state. Bloggers tend to be the worst offenders, by far. Blogging can be great to build your reputation and quickly get your ideas published, but it can be too easy to write without thinking. If you have a professional blog, i.e. not a personal online diary, please remember that it is your face to the outside world. Not only that, but many blog entries are indexed and saved for a long time. I once did a search on my name and saw a negative comment I’d written on someone else’s blog two years earlier! Think, think, think. In one extreme case, a consultant I know claimed to have done a ‘brain dump’ (nice expression, isn’t it?) during one weekend, typed it all up the next weekend and then published it more or less in that format a few weeks later. Unfortunately the ﬁnished product read like the brain dump it was and did not do the author any favours. Do I sound like a prophet of doom? You know I don’t really want to put you off the idea of writing and publishing your ideas and views and becoming known as the expert you are. I

As coaches and practitioners, we need our written material to be our spokesperson and to do the sales job for us in many cases paragraphs. Please read between the lines as well and appreciate that sometimes there isn’t a nice, positive way to say things. I have written it this way because I care about your success, I am trying to get your attention here and help you achieve your outcomes. Think twice about what you are putting out there into the market. You want to write and publish books, articles and blogs that will build your reputation, not destroy it. Here are some serious mistakes I have seen people make over the past few years: Unprofessional image created by disjointed articles and books that were not proofread thoroughly – I have seen at least ten examples of this in the past few months. There is no excuse for it. Use spell-checking software, ask someone else to proofread your work and if you are publishing a book, you absolutely must

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only want to save you from wasting time, money and effort. So let me end on a positive note. You are more than capable of writing excellent blogs, articles and books to reach an even wider audience, build your reputation and bring in an extra income. You are also capable of maintaining a professional attitude towards writing and publishing. Please help me raise the standard in the industry and I promise, you will enjoy all the fame and fortune that you deserve. Mindy Gibbins-Klein is better known as The Book Midwife (TM). She has helped hundreds of experts get their message out into the market by writing and publishing the best possible books, ebooks, articles and other products. A trained coach and marketing consultant with over 18 years of experience, Mindy passionately believes that every book deserves to be written and published, but only if it is the best book it can be. The Book Midwife™ delivers workshops, information products and private coaching and consultancy. For more information, see www.bookmidwife.com

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| 47

REGIONAL GROUPS

rapport networking contact Practice Group of the month

Andy Smith of the Manchester Business NLP and Emotional Intelligence Group

ormed in 2004 by NLP trainer Andy Smith, the Manchester Business NLP and Emotional Intelligence Group is a showcase for NLP as it relates to the world of work and business for anyone who is interested. The group meets on the ﬁrst Tuesday evening of each month (except January) in central Manchester. There is a different guest presenter each month, each one an expert in their ﬁeld. As the group’s attendees range from NLP Master Practitioners to people who have just come across NLP, the presenters are briefed to avoid jargon and to make their sessions accessible, with plenty of interactive exercises. Presenters have

included Derek Jackson, Julian Russell, Caitlin Walker and Fran Burgess Because the group’s remit covers Emotional Intelligence as well as NLP, it can include the occasional presenter from outside NLP who has something interesting to teach. As a serial NLP group founder (the Richmond NLP group founded ten years ago is still going strong), Andy says that running the group is a labour of love. 3It doesn1t take that much effort, and I get to learn from all these great presenters!2 The group also has an online presence on Facebook.com, allowing members to network with each other. You can view upcoming events at www.manchesternlp.co.uk Andy Smith

England - North

Manchester NLP Group

England - South

Croydon

Harrogate Achievers Club

Tel: 08707 570292

Bedfordshire

Tel: 020 8686 9952

Gary Plunkett

Sonia Marie Saxton

Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nwnlpgroups@aol.com

Email: smesaxton@saxtonpartners. co.uk

Harrogate Practice Group

Tel: 0845 257 0036

Elizabeth Pritchard

Tel: 01326 212 959

Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com

Lancaster Practice Group Dave Allaway

Tel: 01524 847 070

Email: dave@depthfour.com www.depthfour.com

Lancs - Nr Clitheroe

Melody and Joe Cheal

Email: info@realnlp.co.uk www.nlpacademy.co.uk

Newcastle Upon Tyne

Email: info@gwiztrainig.com www.gwiztraining.com

Hants - NLP South

Tel: 0191 456 3930 Mob: 0777 228 1035

Berks - Reading

Tel: 01794 390 651

North Yorkshire

Tel: 01189 831659/ 01189 835 202 Mob: 07778 150641

Philip Brown

Lisa & Mark Wake

Tel: 01642 714702

Email: Awakenconsulting@aol.com www.awakenconsulting.co.uk

North Cumbria - Carlisle

Anne Munro-Kua & Adrian Banger Tel: 01228 517 716

Dawn Haworth

Email: anne@annemunro-kua.com www.annemunro-kua.com

Email: admin@nlpand.co.uk www.nlpand.co.uk

North West & North Wales (Chester)

Leeds - West Yorkshire

Tel: 08707 570 292

Tel: 01254 824 504

Gary Plunkett

Liz Tolchard

Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nlp4fun@aol.com

Email: liztolchard@hotmail.com

York

Manchester Business NLP and Emotional Intelligence Group

Tel: 01904 636 216 Email: info@bronze-dragon.com www.bronze-dragon.com/nlp_group. shtml

Tel: 01943 873 895 Mob: 07909 911 769

Andy Smith

Tel: 0845 83 855 83

Email: andy@practicaleq.com www.manchesternlp.co.uk

48 |

Autumn 2007 - rapport

Michael Carroll

Susanna Bellini & Philip Callaghan

Tel: 01767 640956

Anne-Marie Halliwell

Email: amh@cmcgconsultancy.com www.cmcg-nlp.com

Bucks - Milton Keynes Michael Beale

Tel: 01908 506563 Mob: 07944 388621

Email: michaelbeale@ppimk.com www.ppimk.com

Bucks NLP & Coaching Alison Matthews

Tel: 07976 246151

Email: alisonbmatthews@yahoo.co.uk

Chiswick

Jonathan Bowder

Tel: 0208 992 9523

Email: Jonathan@performancepartners hip.com www.performancepartnership.com The Performance Partnership NLP group run by Jonathan Bowder

Nigel Heath

Email: heatherapy@aol.com www.nlp-south.org.uk

Hertfordshire - NLP & Hypnosis Practice group Gary Sellors

Tel: 07758 303 039

Email: nlpgary@talktalk.net www.thesecretyou.co.uk

Hertfordshire

Your Life Matters NLP & Hypnosis practice group Mick McEvoy Tel: 0208 387 0277 Mob: 07973 386 639

Email: mick.mcevoy1@ntlworld.com

London - Hampstead Najma Zaman

Tel: 020 8926 1297 mob: 07950477318

Email: ﬁrstpath@btinternet.com

London - Central Adrian Hope-Lewis

Tel: 07970 639552 Mob: 07970 639552

www.nlpgroup.freeserve.co.uk

REGIONAL GROUPS London - Central

Sussex - Chichester

Cornwall Practice Group

Scotland

Tel: 01326 212 959

Tel: 020 7249 7472

Tel: 01243 792 122 Mob: 07810 876 210

Edinburgh Centre of Excellence Practice Group

(Business) Mark Underwood

Roger and Emily Terry

London East - Stratford, E15

Email: info@evolutiontraining.co.uk www.evolutiontraining.co.uk

Tel: 020 8597 9200

Sussex - Worthing

Sharon Eden

Email: sharon.eden@womenofcourage. co.uk

Email: jim@espconsultancy.co.uk

London NLP & Hypnosis Practice Group

Andrew T. Austin

Phillip Holt

Tel: 08451 306213 Mob: 07061 003 003

Email: enquiries@nlp-london.com www.nlp-london.com

London - Central/North

Practitioners and above only Jeremy Lazarus Tel: 020 8349 2929

Email: Jeremy@thelazarus.com www.thelazarus.com

London West - Richmond NLP Group Henrietta Laitt

Tel: 0208 874 8203 Mob: 07880 614 040

Email: henrietta@richmondnlpgroup. org.uk www.richmondnlpgroup.org.uk

North London NLP Tom MacKay

Tel: 07815 879 055

Email: tom@mackaysolutions.co.uk www.northlondonnlp.co.uk

Oxford

Jan Freeston

Tel: 01865 516 136

Email: Janinefreeston@aol.com

South East London & City Simon Hedley

Tel: 07930 275 223

Email: londonpractice@psithinking. co.uk www.psithinking.co.uk/londonnlp practicegroup.htm www.ultimatecalm.com

Sussex - Brighton Association of NLP Practitioners Terry Elston

Tel: 0800 074 6425

West Sussex - Chichester Email: andrew@23nlpeople.com www.nlpstudygroup.com

England - East Cambridgeshire

Devon - South-West (totnes) NLP Support Group

Alice Llewellyn & Anna Scott-Heyward Tel: 01803 866706/01803 323885

Devon - Torquay Chris Williams

Tel: 0781 354 9073

Devon & Cornwall NLP Practice Group Nick Evans

Tel: 01752 245 570 Mob: 07832 357 208

Email: phil@excitant.co.uk www.cambsnlp.co.uk

Email: nick@nlp-southwest.co.uk www.nlp-southwest.co.uk

Colchester NLP Group

Dorset

Tel: 01473 326980 Mob: 07710 781782

Tel: 01202 42 42 50

Julian Campbell

John Chisholm or Brian Morton

Email: nlp@lifechangingtherapies.co.uk www.lifechangingtherapies.co.uk/ colnlp.html

Email: john@creative-leadership.co.uk bmhrd@btinternet.com www.nlpdorset.co.uk

Essex - Southend

Swindon, West Country

Tel: 01702 203465

01793 554834

Pauline Oliver

Norfolk NLP Practice Group

Tony Nutley

Email: info@ukcpd.net www.ukcpd.net

Stephen Ferrey

Tel: 01603 211 961

Email: info@motivational-coaching.co.uk www.motivational-coaching.co.uk

Ipswich

Edinburgh NLP Practice Group

Patrick Wheatley & Sheena Wheatley Tel: 07765244030/ 0131 664 4344

Email: wheatley.co@btconnect.com sheena@changingperceptions.org.uk www.changingperceptions.org.uk

Forres/Elgin NLP Practice Group (North of Scotland) Rosie O’ Hara

Tel: 01309 676004

Email: nlphighland@onyxnet.co.uk www.nlphighland.co.uk

Glasgow

Mina McGuigan

Tel: 01236 610 949 Mob: 07916 275 605

Email: mina@nlpacademyscotland.co.uk www.nlpacademyscotland.co.uk

Glasgow Centre of Excellence Practice Group Michael Spence

Tel: 01316 647 854 Mob: 07710 332 841 Email: msnlp@btconnect.com

Tel: 0870 060 1549/0141 248 6484

William Wood

Midlands - Birmingham

Sharon Ellis

Email: msnlp@btconnect.com

East Midlands NLP Group

Email: steve_marsden@btopenworld. com

Redbridge - Ilford

Tel: 0131 664 7854

Glasgow - NLP in Education

Tel: 01332 347141 x2556/ 01332 669364

Tel: 07889 751578

Michael Spence

England - Midlands

Steve Marsden

Mandy Ward

Tel: 0121 625 7193 Mob: 07740 075669

Jeff Goodwin

Email: jeff@nlpscotland.com www.nlpscotland.com

Wales Shropshire & Mid Wales Practice Group Nick Greer

Email: mandy.ward3@virgin.net

Tel: 01743 361133

Email: glenda.yearwood@redbridge. gov.uk www.redbridge.gov.uk

Northants - Northampton

www.nickgreer.com

England - West

Email: ronald.shefﬁeld@virgin.net www.nlpgroups.org

Tel: 020 8098 0820

BATH NLP North East Somerset Philippe Roy

Tel: 01225 404 050

Email: pr@in-focus.org www.bathnlp.co.uk

Sussex - Brighton

Ben Reeve

Tel:01903 821 172 Mob: 07903 564 760 Email: katie@sussex.co.uk www.sussex.co.uk/nlp

Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com

Tel: 07711 711 123

Phil Jones

Email: enquiries@nlpworld.co.uk www.nlpworld.co.uk www.nlp-brighton-assoc.org

Katie Bickerdike

Elizabeth Pritchard

Bath NLP Skills Builder Tel: 01823 334 080

Email: benjamino_32@hotmail.com www.idevelop.co.uk

Bristol

David Grifﬁths

Tel: 01179 423 310

Email: nlpgroup@nickgreer.com

Ron Shefﬁeld

Tel: 01604 812800

Nottingham

Timothy Morrell

Tel: 07810 484 215

Email: tim@focushigher.co.uk www.focushigher.co.uk

West Midlands Worcestershire Sharon Rooke & David Smallwood

Tel:01905 352 882

Email: sharon@SCRassociates.com info@centralnlp.co.uk www.SCRassociates.com

Email: david@metamorphosis.me.uk

Practice Groups meet regularly and give you the chance to share experiences with like minded individuals and fellow professionals. They also offer you the opportunity to further your knowledge and add to your Continual Professional Development (CPD) through informed lectures and workshops. For further information on the Practice Groups listed, please log on to our website, www.anlp.org If you would like to add your Practice Group to this list or change existing details, please contact Lala on 020 8275 1175 or email members@anlp.org.

rapport - Autumn 2007

| 49

ENDNOTE

Trust me, I’m a coach

The importance of client conﬁdentiality Eve Menezes Cunningham

sk any coach or NLP Practitioner about client confidentiality and they’ll nod and say something along the lines of “Absolutely!” But I’ve met many Practitioners and Master Practitioners who seem to think nothing of sharing personal client details. Even names. My mother’s a psychotherapist so I’m more aware than most about the importance of client confidentiality. Psychotherapists and Counsellors have a lot of training around confidentiality and ethics so what can we, as NLP Practitioners learn from them to help us improve our service? According to the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP), confidentiality is “an obligation arising from the client’s trust.” Psychotherapists have “supervision” which means that they have their own sessions with an experienced practitioner so can talk about their clients without breaking confidentiality. They can also work through any issues the client might be triggering for them. Even though NLP Practitioners are less likely to be dealing with trauma and distress, issues can crop up leaving them feeling ill-equipped. What if you feel that your client may harm themselves or someone else? Legally, confidentiality would be over-ridden. The BACP recommend talking to clients in advance of them expressing this kind of thought. This way, they know that if they

50 |

Autumn 2007 - rapport

do threaten to harm themselves or anyone else, you are obligated to break confidentiality. Tanya Dransfield, a Clinical Hypnotist who also uses Psychotherapy and NLP (www. tanyadransfield.com) says, “Establishing confidentiality is the bedrock of creating rapport with my clients. Make sure that the client knows without a shadow of a doubt that whatever they say to you stays in the room. They need to feel safe. Sometimes, a client might say ‘I can’t tell you this’ so I reassure them. I also tell them that it’s important that they do tell me as the thing they’re worried about talking about may be the thing I need to know to help them. I tell them that no one’s going to come into the room. Whatever they say is going to be OK. I normalise anything that they’ve got to say.” In extreme cases, if a client is talking about harming themselves or someone else, you would need to alert the relevant people. Tanya says, “I cover this kind of thing in the pre-talk so they know that if they tell me about this kind of thought, I’ll be getting in touch with a social worker. They’re under my duty of care so telling them this will often act as a deterrent.” If you’re writing or speaking

about your work, it’s worth thinking about how you’ll address this kind of issue, too. I did a radio interview today and when the DJ asked me about the type of clients I have, I was exceedingly cautious to avoid breaking any kind of conﬁdentiality. Telephone Coaching is great for clients who want that added anonymity. It has been a popular and practical choice for years. For Telephone Psychotherapy, the BACP recommend considering everything down to who phones who. They advise their members to warn clients that if they’re making the phone call, the therapist’s phone number will appear on the

Even though NLP Practitioners are less likely to be dealing with trauma and distress, issues can crop up leaving them feeling ill-equipped phone bill. And if the therapist is ringing the client, they need to have a plan in case someone else answers. This kind of situation is most likely to be an issue in situations of domestic violence. Storing notes is another thing that you should take seriously. You should already be registered appropriately under the Data Protection Act 1998. Is your

computer is secured with password protection and appropriate encryption and encoding software? I offer emailed session summaries to my clients so always check that the email address I have for them is ﬁne to send these to. If your client is using a work computer, do they know that their IT department can probably access their read emails? Public computers at libraries and internet café can also be less secure than you’d like. Your newsletter subscribers should also feel safe and secure once they’ve subscribed. They should be able to “opt out” at any time and you also need to reassure them that you won’t be selling their details to any third party. Sending group emails should also be considered carefully. I often email teleseminar / workshop participants after group coaching sessions. If they’ve been a particularly friendly group, I sometimes ask if they want to share their emails with each other so they can continue to offer support. If you don’t get this kind of consent, any group emails should be sent using the blind copy (bcc) option. This also helps prevent spreading potential computer viruses. Using simple NLP techniques like future pacing (from enquiries through actual sessions and potential follow up) will help you identify each challenge you’ll need to handle. Then you can ensure appropriate conﬁdentiality for your clients much more easily.

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