Rapport 11 - Spring 2008

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ISSUE ELEVEN

spring 2008

Al Gosling Extreme success entrepreneur

Pass Exams Easily Using NLP

Mind Mapping

The map may not be the territory

Allergies & NLP Is it safe to risk it?

THE MAGAZINE FOR PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

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contents

spring 2008

4 NEWS

What’s happening

6 DEBATE

NLP and Research

8 NLP

I love the Spring, when the

greyness of Winter reawakens in a plethora of colour – yellow daffodils light up hedgerows and green leaves cover bare branches…what a wonderful impact! Andy Coote’s Mind Mapping article (p13) has had a huge impact on me this issue. I have always had a vague interest in Mind Mapping, and since first reading Andy’s article, I have been motivated to get coloured pens AND Mind Mapping software, and I am now organising my notes (and life) in a far more productive fashion. So thank you, Andy.

David Grove Tribute

10 COLUMN

Conference review and NLP Presuppositions

16 LIFESTYLE

Dr John Demartini

18 EDUCATION

Pass Exams Easily

20 INTERNATIONAL

Thankfully, I have passed that period of my life where exams and revision were the main focus (now there’s a positive reframe on getting old!) and yet we probably all know someone who can benefit from Michael Carroll’s advice on how to pass exams easily (p18).

Enjoy your Spring, and we’ll be back in time for the Summer roses and holidays.

Karen Moxom

16

Bosnia

22 CELEBRITY

So I will definitely take Eve’s advice on page 30 and ‘do the things that are important today. Tomorrow may be too late and your grandchildren (or children in my case) may be grown up and gone’. Wise words indeed and ones I do my best to honour when combining my roles of Rapport Publisher, MD of ANLP, house builder and mum to Daniel (7) and Tom (20)!

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Mind Mapping

I find myself being even more grateful for all sorts of things since reading Dr John DeMartini’s philosophy for life (p16), and even though I never met David Groves, the inspiration behind Clean Language (p8), I am grateful that he contributed so much to his field, and left us with a legacy that is having a positive effect on so many people.

And this time of year, with exams round the corner for students around the world, we are reminded that even if life does become temporarily imbalanced, it is important to hold that bigger picture and strive to achieve the work life balance that suits us.

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12 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Entrepreneur Al Gosling

24 BUSINESS

Women Who Mean Business

26 HEALTH

Allergies and NLP

30 COACHING

18

Work-Life Balance

32 NLP

Flight of the Sea Eagle

34 ANLP DEVELOPMENT

ANLP International Ambassador, Robert Smith

36 RESEARCH

Qualitative Studies

38 TRAINING

Passion in Action

40 DIARY

8

Events taking place over the next few months

Cover stories 43 BOOK REVIEWS

The latest books reviewed by our panel

44 AUTHOR INTERVIEW

Steve Nobel

48 REGIONAL GROUPS

Nottingham NLP Practice Group

50 ENDNOTE

Practice Makes Perfect

46 PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT

Editorial Team: Caitlin Collins, Andy Coote, Eve Menezes Cunningham, Mandy Smith Team@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1162 Art Editor: Enzo Zanelli Advertising: David Hammond david@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1189 Membership, subscriptions and back issues: Emma Tunnadine Members@anlp.org, 0845 053 1162

The Reframe Game and How to Win it

Publisher: Karen Moxom karen@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1162 Company Reg No. 05390486 Phoenix Publishing Ltd 41 Marlowes Hemel Hempstead, HP1 1LD Rapport published by Phoenix Publishing on behalf of ANLP. Design: Square Eye Design

DISCLAIMER The views within this magazine are not necessarily those of the publisher, nor does the publisher endorse the products or services promoted in the magazine. Articles are for information only and intent is to inform. Readers should seek professional advice before adopting any suggestions or purchasing any products herein.

rapport - Spring 2008

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Research Conference 5th July 08

NEWS

Advanced Language Retreat with Charles Faulkner

C

harles Faulkner – whose well-received NLP Conference presentation on Meta Patterns: The Biological Basis of NLP described a new, easier and more natural linguist model for NLP language patterns and change – will be leading a six day, two-part residential training program in Exmoor (Somerset, UK) 26 April through 1 May 2008 on coaching, counseling and consulting applications of his work. Limited to 12 delegates who stay in a luxury country lodge in the beautiful English countryside with Charles, this program will provide plenty of opportunities for personal and professional attention and development. Also, Charles will make use of the grounds to accelerate learning and demonstrate tasking change. Due to the advanced content of this workshop, participants must have at least a Practitioner level competence in NLP or its equivalent. For more information and registration, contact: http://www. shiningminds.co.uk/Training-MetaPatterns

Booking now open - visit www.som.surrey.ac.uk/nlp2008

Reader Offer: Submit questions to Frank Farrelly

R

ichard Bandler and John Grinder modelled Frank Farrelly when creating the field of NLP and describe him in Frogs into Princes as “a really exquisite example of requisite variety” At the age of 76 Frank is still presenting workshops on Provocative Therapy and in recent times has talked about meeting the creators of NLP and his work since creating Provocative Therapy in 1963 and releasing the classic book of the same name in 1974 In Nick Kemp’s latest interview with Richard Bandler, Richard describes Frank in the following ways “You know, Farrelly had to be one of the most courageous people on the face of the earth to do the wackiest things he did…What I respect about Frank is that he stuck to his guns. No matter how much they told him therapy should be boring or how much they told him he was over the edge,

what he noticed is he made people better” Rapport readers have been given the opportunity to ask Frank a question about his work and his 50 years experience of clinical experience dealing with some of the most challenging client conditions. The best question submitted will also receive the “A Provocative Approach” 6 DVD set of Frank Farrelly filmed during the 2007 annual UK Provocative Therapy workshop hosted by Tranceforming NLP and a copy of Nick Kemp’s “Provocative Change Works for Phobias” 2 DVD set which has narration and commentary by Frank Farrelly. Please email your question(s) to admin @anlp.org or fax to 0845 0531176 by 31-05-08 See www.provocativetherapy.info & www.provocativetherapytraining.com for Frank Farrelly workshop dates, articles and products.

Project Genie by Rachel Parsons

M

y passion is Project Genie, an education program on climate change delivered free to schools (www.projectgenie.org.uk) When I went to Passion in Action, I’d been volunteering for 6 months and I wasn’t sure if I could keep going. I was the only one supporting the project’s founder, had no support, was totally broke and getting increasingly depressed with the inevitability of climate change. I was close to tears and ready to give up. However, the Judy and Judy show worked. Their magic and gentle encouragement built me back up again and importantly taught me

about skills such as selfsponsorship, self-recognition and visualisation, skills which I’ve used every day. Six months later and the project is now getting global recognition as a leader in the field of education and sustainability. We have had some major donations in – more are on their way. I’ve helped build an amazing team, I’ve got over 110 schools to trial the project - and they’ve shown that they can save up to 70% on their energy bills - which is amazing result both in terms of costs and

CO2 saved! But best of all Passion helped me to believe in myself. Believe that I was good enough to do the job and up to the challenge. Now I have my perfect job working with amazing and inspiring industry leaders and doing something that I absolutely totally love. Project Genie aims to help children become part of the worlds solutions not it’s problems. It is free to schools and targeted at 7 – 11 year olds. Please drop me a line if you’d like to know more...rachel@projectgenie.org.uk

Powerful Stuff - Denise Collins This NLP is powerful stuff you know. I know you know that already but even now, many years after my first introduction to it I am still sometimes wonderfully amazed. The concept of “no failure only feedback”, literally changed my life. The notion of behavioral flexibility enables me to run several successful personal development businesses which go from strength to strength. And I live by the mantra of, “if what you are doing isn’t working, do something different”.

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Since 2000 I have worked as a Hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner. At first from home. Then two years ago I rented a room in a lovely old building, brimming with charm and character. Next to the railway and bus stations, in the heart of Chelmsford town centre. I now occupy the whole building! Comprising of two fabulous consulting / therapy rooms, a big bright sunny meeting room, two large well equipped training rooms, an office and break out/café area.

In addition to still seeing individual clients, offering supervision, devising and delivering Hypnotherapy and NLP training courses, I now also run “Hummingbird House; Centre of Positive Change”. www.hummingbirdeffect.com www.know-more-training.co.uk Maybe you do as I do and use NLP to assist you ….. Dream your dreams… create your dreams…. and live your dreams.



DEBATE

NLP and Academic Research – an inevitable liaison? There are some compelling reasons why NLP should be seeking to develop an evidence base for the approach, tools and techniques. There are also some difficulties in producing research that is unbiased and unequivocal in its conclusions. Developing research for NLP whilst avoiding the pitfalls is the subject of this issue’s debate. Andy Coote asked the questions.

I

n the last issue of Rapport, we reported on plans for the first Academic Conference to provide a platform for those working in research and NLP to meet with practitioners and other interested parties. The article prompted some thoughts on how the NLP community should view Academic Research – as welcome or with suspicion. We asked three members of the NLP and Academic community to help us understand the issues. NLP provokes many reactions amongst the various communities in which we operate. Some of those reactions can be very negative whilst others simply want us to be able to prove the effectiveness of the techniques we use. As it grows in size and scope, there are strong voices calling for NLP to develop into a credible profession. Paul Tosey suggests “it is not likely to progress much further if it doesn’t”. To do that, it is suggested, NLP needs to develop an evidence base. “In an evidence based environment such as healthcare we need to develop evidence in order to get support.“ suggests Suzanne Henwood, “The onus to do this is on the NLP community, because if we don’t then no-one else will”. Others are more cautious. Daryll Scott has reservations about the approach that research may use. Referring to NLP as an Epistemology (see box), he cautions “normal science is generally observation based. In personal science we have only personal experience. This cannot be observed objectively.” He worries that there are too many variables

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involved in the process to rely on the results and quotes a study “in the 60s or 70s where a group of 100 subjects were played a recording of a hypnotic induction. 60% displayed the symptoms of trance – physiological changes that were observable. The conclusion was that 60% of the people involved were susceptible to hypnosis. However that could only be true on that one occasion and although they had removed one variable – the hypnotherapist – they still had variability in that the people in the room may have responded differently to

is well recognised and it has got a fair bit of evidence to support it. My belief is that NLP is at least as effective as CBT but quicker. As the NHS has major funding issues, if we could produce the evidence, then we could get them results more quickly with NLP, so that they can see more patients or discharge less before their course of treatment is completed.” Tosey suggests that NLP is a practical knowledge system and, as such, “we don’t need a watertight theory to underpin it but until it is defined it will be undervalued by the broader scientific community.” The research that is undertaken also needs to be “open to negative findings and to the need for changes in NLP.” It seems reasonable to first define NLP and that is less than simple to do. “If we go back to original NLP as set out in Structure of Magic – modelling and grammar – is that still what we define as NLP? If so, very few of us are doing that now – it has developed” comments Henwood. Scott offers a classification of the elements of NLP, “NLP Modelling - a stand alone modelling technology for any unit of human behaviour; NLP Patterns coded from the NLP modelling process (the mapping of tacit knowledge of a genius into an explicit model); patterns unique to NLP and, finally, the practice of NLP.” He cautions that the last element contains “the enormous variable of individual Practitioner competence” an issue we have debated here before and where research may give some assistance.

My belief is that NLP is at least as effective as CBT but quicker a different hypnotherapist or induction or on a different day.” He accepts that research is probably necessary if NLP wishes to develop further in some fields. There was general agreement that the more extreme critics and sceptics of NLP would be unlikely to be won over by evidence, but it would increase general acceptance by funding bodies in healthcare and education and allow NLP to become more accepted by business and amongst the general population. It should provide a real opportunity for NLP practitioners to make a difference. As an example, Henwood suggests the areas of therapy for stress and depression. “At the moment CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy)


DEBATE

A research project to define a core of NLP as it is currently perceived by the community may be one of the first areas we need to address. Charles Faulkner has suggested that by defining the core and mapping some of the elements across to other disciplines, it may be possible to discover relevant research that already exists. What form should the research take? Quantitative research favours numbers and measurements whilst qualitative is more concerned with the perceptions of those involved in the research. “In a new field – and NLP is only 30 years old and developing all the time – it is often best to begin with qualitative methodologies”, suggests Henwood. “Phenomenology (see box) may offer an approach in the early stages.” She does not rule out quantitative research. “Like a lot of psychological research, there is a lot of qualitative and quantitative data. You could say if a particular strategy only worked for eight out of 10 people, why didn’t it work for the other 2? For me the qualitative element is more important than the quantitative but both have their place. Tosey can see a mixture of the two approaches working, too. “We can map inner landscapes but we can’t prove exactly what is happening. We could find out much more with NLP and create maps through being consistent in our approach. If everybody uses, for example, the meta model patterns, although the content in each case will be unique and subjective, the structures may well be universal and can be applied consistently to anyone. Therefore they can become comparable across different people and the method becomes transparent.” Scott has reservations about a quantitative approach, “The danger is that in order to eliminate any bias and variables from the research, the problem will be stripped to the laboratory conditions and that will remove elements that are vital to the examination. NLP is a two-way feedback loop and in my opinion, a quantitative approach is not suitable for the examination of the field”. Should research be at a macro level, with an NLP practitioner working in a fluid way using the tools in a way that is appropriate to the circumstances they see in front of them or at a micro level, looking at specific techniques? Scott cautions against the latter. “It is difficult, if not impossible, to remove the variable of the practitioner from research. If Gordon Ramsay creates a beautiful dish in his kitchen, then codes what he has done into a recipe and gives it to chefs of wildly differing abilities, the results will be far more a reflection of the ability of the chefs that it will of the

model for recipe. If we place Gordon Ramsay in a variety of kitchens, we would expect that the model would work with some variations of a nonmaterial nature and if we only use other top level chefs to reproduce Ramsay’s model, there will be some variations which will reflect the preferences of the other chefs, but the overall results will be of high quality”. Tosey agrees, “reducing research to the elements disregards all the human aspects of experience, communication and relating. I want to work in the spirit of NLP as a method of investigation true to the spirit and how it all began”.

In an evidence based environment such as healthcare we need to develop evidence in order to get support Henwood is involved in designing research, which whilst not double blind, attempts to randomise results to gain some objective data. The Cardiac rehab research will be undertaken using NLP. Three options will be used for the subjects – standard rehab, a random selection of people who will receive an additional NLP module and a group who do no rehab at all. “We will build the research in such a way that the qualitative comes after the quantitative. We plan to use PHQ questionnaires to measure anxiety and depression and determine an objective score before conducting interviews and asking opinions about what was effective or not.” With the development of neurological research and brain scanning techniques using MRI scanners, Tosey can see how research may move into observing what happens in the brain when NLP patterns are being used, though it is not his field of study. There is potential for this type of work to move things forward rapidly if the results are favourable. Tosey also suggests that NLP may have application as a research methodology. “Using meta model categories for analysing interview transcripts for example and as a framework to spot language patterns. NLP and related technologies have not been used in that way before and I think there is an exciting potential for helping researchers make more fine distinctions”. NLP forms the basis – or at least forms a significant part – of many high profile change

programmes. There is a potential for the imperatives of the business model to hold back the development of the core understanding of NLP - what we might call the professional model. Henwood suggests, “Getting one or two big names on board may be useful. They could be high profile public names or well-known industry figures. Using the evidence from the numbers of people going through some NLP courses in order to test and research may be something that they would be prepared to do”. Charles Faulkner is involved with the NLP Academic Conference (see below) and Judith DeLozier has indicated support. Steve Andreas and a number of other industry names are involved with the Research and Recognition Project (http://www.nlpiash.org/dnn/research There is certainly an opportunity, and arguably a need, for NLP to get more intimately acquainted with Academic Research. We have to hope that the offspring are a credit to the parents. To get involved in this debate go to the ANLP website at http://www.anlp.org/ forum/default.asp and go to the ‘General Interest’ section or write to the Editor. The first international Neuro-Linguistic Programming Research Conference is being planned for the UK in July 2008. Organised by the University of Surrey in partnership with ANLP International, it is being billed as “independent of any NLP training organisation”. More information and call for papers at www.som. surrey.ac.uk/nlp2008.

Some Relevant Scientific Terms Epistomology - The branch of philosophy that studies the nature of knowledge, its presuppositions and foundations, and its extent and validity. Phenomenology – A philosophy or method of inquiry based on the premise that reality consists of objects and events as they are perceived or understood in human consciousness and not of anything independent of human consciousness.

The Participants Daryll Scott NLP Trainer, Noggin - http://www.mynoggin.co.uk/ about/practitioners/daryllscott/ Suzanne Henwood NLP Master Practitioner, Henwood Associates http://www.henwoodassociates.co.uk/ Paul Tosey School of Management Studies at University of Surrey - Chair of the University of Surrey NLP Research Conference Committee

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NLP

DAVID GROVE AND CLEAN LANGUAGE TRIBUTE by Eve Menezes Cunningham

B

est known as the inspiration behind Penny Tomkins and James Lawleys’ Metaphors in the Mind and Clean Language, David Grove’s recent death has saddened people across the globe. Here is a selection of tributes to him: Fran Burgess, Director and Trainer at The Northern School of NLP (www.nlpand.co.uk), met David at a small weekend group experience in West London. She says, “Through the work of James and Penny, I have

another highly effective modelling process to offer clients, and another illustration of Constructivist thinking. I often cite him with our learners when we are exploring the area of rapport. Anyone who believes that rapport is established and maintained through matching or mirroring physiology hadn’t met David. “He would be slouched in his chair, apparently paying absolutely no attention to me whatsoever to the point that I could be talking to the fireplace, yet he was profoundly and intently taking up residence in my map. He was a master of second positioning and intuitive modelling. He was an innovator, went outside the confines of his own map and the map of many other people, sometimes with astounding effect. We are the

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richer for it.” Sue Knight, international NLP trainer and author of Introducing NLP, NLP Solutions and NLP at Work (www.sueknight.co.uk) met David about 12 years ago. Sue says, “I was inspired by his way of working and the way he used language. Since Penny and James modelled him, Clean Language has been used by me and many other people.” Sue decided to use a metaphor to describe David, “as he was so fond of them: It was like the first time I saw a shooting star. I think he was a very modest man and I loved the way he preferred anonymity. I wonder if he had any idea how many people he affected. I’m in India at the moment and so many people here have been influenced by him. I think it’s fantastic that Penny and James modelled him. At least we have a way of accessing what he did.” Judy Rees, one of the two Directors of the Clean Change Company (www.cleanchange.co.uk), says, “David really was a maverick genius who you couldn’t keep pace with. Ideas would be bouncing all over the place. He would be coming up with amazing schemes. He didn’t have a home, didn’t have a partner and was constantly moving on to find new people to play with, find new inspiration and suggestions. He came out with huge transformational ideas which no one else had thought about. It is a loss that those ideas aren’t going to be coming from him any more. I can’t claim to have been close to him but he was clearly a brilliant bloke.” Judy has been talking to many people since David’s passing and has been struck by the impact he had on people who knew him 30 or 40 years ago as well as more recently. Wendy Sullivan, her Co-director at the Clean Change Company says, “I was really shocked initially because he was not universally clean in his language at all.” Rather than using her metaphor, he suggested that she change it. Because she trusted his insight, Wendy was happy to do this. Others in the group said they wanted to keep their own metaphors and David easily used their exact words back with them. He truly was a genius with creativity seeping from every pore. I remember him as someone who’s made enormously significant contributions relating to understanding the nature of what makes people tick. He was very charismatic man who had a great sense of humour and a great deal of warmth. There was something about the rapport that he managed to build up. Often, when he wasn’t Clean [with his language] he absolutely hit the nail on the head. The sense was that he had such great insight into people that he was able to shortcut. He was constantly moving on, not a person for dotting ‘i’s’ and crossing ‘t’s’ at all. He needed to be exploring new ideas perpetually keeping himself entertained. He was a real maverick.” Carol Wilson is MD of Performance Coach Training Ltd and Cofounder of Clean Coaching featuring Emergent Knowledge (www. performancecoachtraining.com) with David Grove, now headed jointly with Angela Dunbar. She remembers David’s “Good sense of humour. He was very true to himself. I discovered David’s work through Penny and James’ website when I first entered the field of coaching and David’s


NLP

work has influenced everything I have done.” She had “3 sessions with Penny and James in 2002. Using the techniques they developed from David, they cured me of a life long fear of public speaking, now my key professional activity. David liked to practise new techniques on me and I remember a session we did about the sense of panic I experienced about taking on too many projects and not having enough time to do them properly. I didn’t want to cut down on projects, just lose the uncomfortable sense of panic. Two hours of David working with me about time saw the panic off forever. Now I can happily work on too many things without minding a bit. “Over the last few years I committed a lot of time to work with him on developing his new theories concerning Emergent Knowledge. We created Clean Coaching featuring Emergent Knowledge there. We talked about writing a book together. I intend to write that book in the way that I believe he would have wished. “I remember small kindnesses. Shortly after my mother had died I mentioned that she used to give me the crosswords out of her newspaper and that I had just finished the stockpile. The next time I saw him he had bought me one of the newspapers! He dedicated every waking hour to the development of his work; every scrap of energy and every penny he earned went on that.”

When a childhood friend tried to get him to buy a house for security, Carol says, “I remember David saying, astonished, ‘But then the money couldn’t go into Emergent Knowledge!’ As if the idea was completely preposterous. I would like people to remember how kind he was in small ways and that when he made life difficult, it was only in order to achieve something that he felt necessary in his work – it was never for his personal gain or comfort. He was endlessly kind both in thought and deed – helping practically around the house and by building things, listening and never counting the time to help people with their problems.” Jennifer de Gandt (www. innovativepathways.net) says, “In the last five years David has come to my home in Normandy where I have arranged for him to give seminars to ‘les femmes fatales de France’. We laughed and experimented and played with his new ideas about numbers. I am sure that the explosion of projects that he offered us will bear fruit. How can we not go on to realise some of his plans for him, when he has given us so much with his untiring generosity and friendship? His Clean Language was the start of so much for us. We learnt to be rigorous but non-intrusive, to stand beside without pushing, to watch and wait and then to see structure emerge. Thank you David, you will be with us for a long time in spirit. May you rest in peace with your ancestors. We thank you deeply for your irrepressible ability to be yourself and no-one else!” Penny Tompkins and James Lawley (www.cleanlanguage.co.uk) say, “It is as important now as when we first met David to keep his thinking and his work alive for others to learn from and enjoy. He was a creative genius, an inspirational therapist and one hell of a man.” If you would like more information, or want to make a donation to the David Grove Memorial Fund (to help with the high costs involved in bringing David back to his Maori homeland), please visit www. davidgrove.org And keep an eye out for the world’s first ever Clean Language Conference in London on 21st and 22nd June 2008 (www.cleanchange.co.uk).

The sense was that he had such great insight into people that he was able to shortcut

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COLUMN

The NLP Conference does it again! by Sharon Eden

the nlp conference T

he 2007 NLP Conference last November, held at Regents College in London, proved just as lively, informative and professional as always. The conference team led by Jo Hogg organised a cornucopia of workshops and mini sessions by both leading and lesser known thetrainers, nlpauthors conference NLP and coaches. And with day time, lunch time and evening sessions, everyone, from NLP Novices to Master Trainers, couldn’t help but gain new knowledge and skills. ‘From Sex, Diets and Success’ with Shelle

Rose Charvet to ‘Crafty Meetings’ with Michael Mallows. From ‘The Glue What Binds the Map’ with Michael Breen to ‘Healing and Wellbeing’ with Arielle Essex. From Judith DeLozier’s one day ‘Leading with Passion’ to Martin Reed’s 45 minutes’ ‘Staying Safe on the Streets using NLP’. You could also have spent loads of money in the Anglo American book shop (irresistible for me!), explored NLP and associated companies’ stands... and networked like mad. Ample opportunity to catch up with old NLP friends and create new ones.

Great value! Indeed, there was a general, collective buzz of stimulated and well satisfied delegates milling around at break times. Of course, there was the odd workshop or presenters who didn’t meet attendees’ expectations. However, the choice of topics on offer meant you could always slip out and find another session to capture your interest. I know, because I did! All in all, “Perfeck!” as Pa Larkin would say. For details of the NLP one day Spring Conference visit www.nlpconference. co.uk

The Presuppositions of NLP A Positive Intention underlies all Behaviour by Caitlin Collins

T

he NLP presuppositions are tools to help us transcend the boundaries of our limiting beliefs about ourselves and our world. The point is not to believe or disbelieve any presupposition, but rather to consider what might be the implications of acting ‘as if ’ you believed it and imagine what differences that could make to your life now and in the future. I suspect my coaching clients think me rather eccentric as I enthuse about the self-sabotaging habits they find so distressing. But I’m enthusing because I believe that in their smoking / drinking / shopping problem lie the seeds of world peace ... We’re such complicated creatures, with our strange compulsive drives to do peculiar things. Most people in the grip of compulsive behaviour – smoking, overeating, shopping, whatever – are caught in a turmoil of self-recrimination and guilt as

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the part of them that prompts the behaviour gets punished by other parts that disapprove – yet still continues to whisper, so seductively, ‘Go on, do it again!’ Asked to imagine what the problem part might look like, many see it as a devil: they demonise that part of themselves and judge it as ‘bad’. But opening up to the possibility that the part is not bad, and is actually trying to do its best to honour a positive intention, can enable us to heal our inner conflict and free up the energy locked into it. What does the part really want? What is its positive intention? Remember, it’s a part of you. Trust that it wants something good for you! Keep on asking it what it wants, and let it take you deeper, to love, security, freedom – whatever it really wants, it’s wholesome. The smoking or shopping is an attempt to assuage

a feeling of unease and to find some kind of fulfilment – and there’s nothing wrong with that! The intention is all right; it’s just the way of trying to achieve it that’s a problem! Identifying the deeper intention and recognising it as wholesome can be very liberating, enabling you to stop demonising that part of yourself. Then there are many ways to work with the part to help it find other strategies that are more constructive than smoking or shopping! There are some great NLP techniques for working along these lines: my favourite is the Core Transformation Process developed by Connirae and Tamara Andreas. It’s an elegant and effective method which allows you to identify the constructive intention and establish an alternative

pathway for reaching it. A very kind approach, it offers true conflict resolution, as all the relevant psychological parts are heard and honoured and everyone gains. I believe that ‘as within, so without’ – if we can heal our inner conflicts kindly, maybe we can bring that skill to our relationships in the world. And if we can find a way to world peace through our own ‘bad’ habits, well, how could anyone not be enthusiastic about that! Caitlin Collins www. naturalmindmagic. com, 01643 841310, info@ naturalmindmagic.com


Provocative Change Works Training Provocative Therapy Training NLP Certificated Training Hypnosis Training What people are saying about Nick Kemp’sProvocative Change Works for Phobias DVD set (buy online at www.human-alchemy.net) “I watched it twice…. It's a charming, British statement. You were amusing; you really get her laughing…, very very impressive!"

Frank Farrelly

“This DVD has it all... Nick Kemp's brilliant therapeutic demonstrations, exceptional production values including fine music and titles, even screen-in-screen commentary by Frank Farrelly himself! Very well done, indeed.

Doug O'Brien - NLP Trainer

"In these excellent DVDs, Nick Kemp demonstrates how to use a combination of Provocative Therapy, simple anchoring, submodalities and hypnosis to quickly cure a phobia of needles and claustrophobia, with immediate tests to show that the process was successful. Nice work."

Steve Andreas NLP author, trainer, developer

This is modelling excellence at its best.

Sue Knight NLP Trainer and author

See www.nickkemptraining.com for current training courses & www.nickkemp.com for projects

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PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

The Map may not be the territory – but it has many uses Mind Maps have become a very useful and versatile tool for expressing and understanding concepts and for developing ideas. Andy Coote, a mind mapper himself for 20 years, examines why and looks at the ways in which maps are used by some NLP Practitioners and therapists

I

t is good practice, I was taught, when writing features not to make the material too personal – and so I won’t, except to say that I have been an active mind mapper for some 20 years since it was first introduced to me on a Time Manager course, much of which, now I think of it, I don’t actually apply – but the mind mapping stuck. I’ve since used maps for many purposes, some of which will appear in this article and, like Bob Dylan at the Newport Folk Festival, I’ve ‘gone electric’ in recent years, using a Tablet PC and mind mapping software. This article was planned using mind maps. My first encounter with Mind Maps™, back in the 1980s, was in a BBC book called Use Your Head written by Tony Buzan. Buzan has claimed Mind Mapping for his own since he developed his form of it in the 1960s, though it is suggested that mapping in similar forms may be age old in its origins. The words Mind Map are trademarked by Buzan’s organisation in the UK and USA. When I refer to mind maps and mind mapping in this article, however, I will be referring to maps that do not necessarily conform to Buzan’s rules. Mind mapping is a flexible way of note taking, organising, structuring and remembering information that can be easily extended without worrying about changing the underlying structure. The beauty of this form of working is that there is no imposition of structure until you choose to determine it – and even then, it can be changed quickly and easily. Mind maps are also useful, as we will see in a Therapy and Coaching context, for group or individual work including the co-creation and sharing of ideas. In its simplest form, a mind map is created freehand, preferably on a large sheet of paper. Initial mapping can be quick and instinctive. From an initial idea in the centre of the paper, ideas and themes can be added to the central idea and to each other. Relationships between branches can identified. Creating a mind map of everything that is known about a problem, for example, may lead, as we will see, to breakthrough either by combining ideas or by noting what is absent. In recent years, a number of software applications have been developed that allow mapping to take place on a PC or Mac. The additional benefits of software include the ability to move branches

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PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

allows capture of pertinent details

verbal and non verbal

allows overview of areas not yet explored extract the essence from recordings/memory

works across multiple sessions

spotting 'structural equivalence' between metaphors

allows development of relationship questions

developed by questioning their perception of the issue

Personal coaching and change work

What benefits do you get?

Hypnosis

One line describe what you do

creation of hypotheses

NLP Clean Language Symbolic Modelling www.changeinside.com www.cleanchange.com

mapping the client's mind

www.cleanlanguage.com what would you like to have happen Subtopic

Answer to opening question at the centre of a map branch off from word and phrases used

start new map based on metaphor isomorphic representation of something going on in their head

NLP ?

Andy Nelson

level? therapist?

trainer trained doesn't like the term

mm for how long?

late 90s read book by Tony Buzan

move to metaphor

more detailed description of how you use (optional)

exploring structure and relationship of internal representation of an issue "like I'm banging my head against a brick wall" what kind of wall is that wall? explore what could have been a throwaway line

development questions

strength of Clean Language to move from shared prototypical description into detail

symbolic modelling

working towards where client wants to go only rarely a mind map

client produces a map of their symbolic landscape

not shared with client

What areas do you use MM in?

manual

Type of approach software

- 30/09/2003 -

organising reports and learning subjects symbolic modelling symbolic modelling maps are all freehand which

not asked

for other purposes

Mind mapping is a flexible way of note taking, organising, structuring and recalling information

mapping books) Buzan makes a great point of around and re-structure maps at will, the mentioning the advantages of mind maps as ability to create groups of maps and to aide memoires. (See Box - A million million be able to create other documents from jabbering neurons…). Though it seems logical maps (and maps from other documents). that mind maps work best for visual people, my To create a basic map using the Buzan experience in talking to mind mappers is that approach, place the subject at the centre most people find the shapes and patterns useful. and radiate outwards through branches Some of the common uses for mind mapping that lead to smaller branches. There must have already been suggested in this article. be only one word per branch and the They can be used as a study aid, both in note use of use of colour and graphics is not taking and in memorising and revision and in research, collecting ideas only encouraged but strongly mandated. Make it graphic using letter and and references for later use. Software mind maps are useful for collecting word shapes and pictures that create a key to the idea in your mind. As a clickable web references as well as direct quotes. I use that process creative tool, it is important to be both expressive and memorable. when I am preparing I take the view that articles such as this and mind maps are a tool for presentations. The and that it is not always A million million jabbering neurons… ultimate use was for a necessary to be strict book I wrote in 2004/5 about Buzan’s rules – The science behind Mind Maps is complex, even though the process of creating one seems where extensive research Tony Buzan, of course, simple. Mind Maps work because they are expressed in the language of the brain, as a sort was recorded, sorted, disagrees with me. I often of ‘explosion’ of thoughts, ideas and emotions that fill the mind day and night. “Brains do much of it discarded and use phrases as well as not work in a straight line, monochromatic, verbal way,” says Tony, “but that is usually how then shaped into chapters single words and many of students are taught. The result is messy, difficult and time-wasting.” using mind mapping my maps are not coloured Buzan likens the Mind Map to a supernova, a bright star which explodes into new patterns software. at all. However, if I want of visible light we can only see after the explosion has taken place. The thought process Leadership to be able to remember is a series of similar explosions. Captured on paper using the rules of Mind Mapping, the Development specialist the map, rather than explosion becomes a snapshot of the brain’s thinking. However, the information and ideas Graham Wilson has been just transforming it into that have been generated are contained, ordered and logical. using Mind Mapping another document, I do for 32 years. “A teacher use colour and graphics. “This is the framework and the fundamental architecture of thought,” he explains. “Each showed us Tony Buzan Software mind maps also node in the Mind Map will contain a potential explosion of its own, so that one branch with presenting ‘Use your allow you to use multi a keyword will trigger many others.” Head’ on super8 and I media additions such as was hooked from that video and audio. Source – The Buzan Organisation point.” He uses maps in In Use Your Head many aspects of his client (and in subsequent mind

rapport - Spring 2008

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PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

work. Every meeting is recorded freehand and relationship of internal representation as are 121 client sessions. “I have created of an issue using Clean Language to move software versions for clients but they are the from shared prototypical description into exception, mostly I use them for the next session detail, mind maps work well in reflecting the and for supervision.” As well as using maps to developing structure. “The map allows me to create articles and books, he also uses them for capture the pertinent details, verbal and non verbal, speaker notes. “They are quick to create so I can do it and allows an overview of areas not yet explored. It ‘on the fly’. The key points are on one page, which keeps you also works across multiple sessions and allows me to extract ‘to the point’ and there are no reams of notes. The main benefit, though, the essence from recordings and my memory. It allows me to spot the is in the delivery. I’m not looking at – or reading from – notes and I have ‘structural equivalence’ between metaphors from which I can create of the flexibility to skip or reorganise material giving me the flexibility to hypotheses to be developed by questioning. We are literally mapping the tailor the speech to time or to the audience feedback.” client’s mind and their perception of the issue. John Farrell works with Emerging Knowledge, which has developed There are many more options for further uses of the software maps. out of NLP and Clean Language and uses NLP techniques with his Gyronix produce a time management system that tracks your projects clients. He also presents a radio programme for a local internet radio and tasks and creates reports including key tasks to be completed and station. His handwritten mind map is part can, if you choose, also use it to track chargeable of an organic process in which he uses key time. Why Mind Maps? words to “spark ideas and capture them in The combination of Tablet PCs, which allow the moment. The themes for the programme pen input directly into a laptop computer, and “People can be successful using only 10% of develop through the week”. Whilst software that allows freehand creation of maps and the cognitive potential of their brains. Mind interviewing, the mind map allows him to “go conversion of them into computer readable maps, Mapping is capable of unleashing the power of with the flow. There is no longwinded script has created new possibilities for capturing data in the other 90% and tapping into latent genius. and I can cover all relevant topics by referring real time. One such possibility, being marketed by When people look back on how they were to one piece of paper”. ‘conferenceREACTION’, is the recording of a operating before they learned to Mind Map, Andy Nelson also uses mind maps in his conference or seminar using mind maps combined they say it is as if they were working in the personal coaching and change work. He with multimedia – audio and video of speeches dark using the wrong tools.” uses hypnosis, NLP, Clean Language and and interviews with participants – all published Symbolic Modelling. Andy discovered mind to participants or a web site within a few days to Tony Buzan mapping in the late 1990s when he read one allow the ideas to be developed and conversation of Tony Buzan’s many books on the subject. to continue. It is in his Symbolic Modelling work that I may well be biased, but it seems clear that mind mind maps play an important part. “I put the answer to the question mapping and NLP have many synergies. From the straightforward use ‘what would you like to have happen’ at the centre of a map and then of maps to develop articles (and yes, I did use one to plan this article) branch off from there noting key words and phrases used. When the and books, to, literally, mapping a client’s mind, they have a flexibility client moves into metaphor, I start a new map based on the metaphor. and versatility that match the flexibility and versatility of the tools and What develops is an isomorphic representation of something going on techniques of NLP. in their head.” As symbolic modelling is about exploring the structure How will you use them?

Further Resources Buzan World http://www.buzanworld.com (Buzan Organisation) http://www.imindmap.com/ MindManager http://www.mindjet.com/uk/

Mind Mapping software (Wikipedia) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_mind_mapping_software

Andy Nelson - www.changeinside.com Conference Reaction http://www.conferencereaction.co.uk/index.html John Farrell - www.coachingemergence.com

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Graham Wilson - www.grahamwilson.org

Gyronix ResultsManager http://www.gyronix.com/resultmanager.php


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LIFESTYLE

Dr John Demartini’s method for wholesale acceptance Before meeting Dr John Demartini, I’d heard him speak a few times and was always startled by the amount of travelling and speaking he does. His immediate response was, “If you love doing that, it doesn’t take energy! It’s all perception.” by Eve Menezes Cunningham

T

he fact that he is a professional speaker and author of more than 40 books is even more satisfying for him as he had been diagnosed with a learning disability as a small child. His hectic schedule of speaking more than 300 days (“minimum”, he says) a year across 50 countries energises him because he loves it. Dr Demartini’s attitude is that, if you’re not leaping out of bed each morning, raring to go, you’re not living a life you love. He suggests asking yourself what you do love doing. It will then be quite easy to see the link between the thing you’re struggling with, motivation wise, and the reason you’re doing it. So, for example, if you’re bored with overtime at work but remind yourself that the extra income is going to pay for your family holiday, you won’t want to hit snooze so many times when your alarm goes off. He insists that he has the balance he wants: “My life is integrated with all those things. My social life is that, my family life travels and meets me because that’s my spiritual quest and it’s what stimulates my mind. And it’s my career. There’s no separation.” Dr Demartini met NLP’s originators, Bandler and Grinder in 1978 when they were doing workshops in Texas. He says, “the tools of NLP are solid, I’m a firm believer in that.” But he is concerned by the idea of “swishing pain into pleasure. I try to get people to see that there’s a balance between pain and pleasure, support and challenge and so on instead of always trying to override one side.” And it’s this balance that can help you get whatever you want. Who do you admire most in the world? According to Dr Demartini, we have all the traits we admire in others

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within ourselves. We also have their less desirable traits. By recognising and owning all these positive and negative traits, we can reduce their emotional hold on us and we can live life more consciously. So take a moment to think about your life as it is right now. What area of your

If you’re really present with somebody, you automatically start doing NLP life do you most want to change? Who do you know (or know of) who has success in that area? List several people you admire in that field. So if you long for a long lasting, loving

relationship, who do you know who has that? If you want wealth, who are the richest people you can think of ? If you want inner peace, who do you know who is serene? Once you have your list, Dr Demartini recommends compiling a “dossier” on each of your subjects. What do you most admire about them? What are their best qualities? You don’t need to know everything down to what they have for breakfast but the more detailed you can make it, the more powerful the exercise will be. If you know them personally, use conversation and observation. Even if you just “know” them through books or television, you can pick up a wealth of information about them. Now look at each quality – positive and negative – and see how you already have it within you. Give this as much time as you need to really let it sink in. By “owning” each quality, you’ll unblock the way for whatever you want. Dr Demartini adds, “Find out what your values are. Find out your primary intention. Don’t lie about that – you have to be truthful. Be really present with people so there’s a congruency and a love of what you do. If you’re really present with somebody, you automatically start doing NLP. “People come up to me and say, ‘Where did you learn all those tools of NLP?’ and I say, ‘I’m just me.’ When you’re off centre, you need the additional intellectual memory of what to do. I’m applying it [NLP] without even thinking I’m applying it. If you’re truly present and inspired by what you do, you’ll be masterful with NLP.” To help with motivation, Dr Demartini stresses the need for a cause that’s bigger than you. Think about single mothers who, against


LIFESTYLE

all the odds put themselves through law school while taking care of their children and holding down several jobs. I can’t begin to imagine having that kind of drive and determination but if your every move is influenced by wanting to give your kids a better life, you’ll succeed. The bigger your cause, he says, the more you can achieve. Dr Demartini says we should pay attention to our thoughts about other people and pay particular attention when these thoughts stray from being in gratitude. He says, “You have an intuition that’s trying to show you something. If you’re infatuated with somebody, your intuition is trying to show you their downside. If you’re resentful about somebody, your intuition is trying to show you their upside. When you see something and you’re way infatuated with it, whether that’s 7 times more positive or negative, your intuition is trying to show you the other side because you’re so emotionally

Why don’t you already have what you’ve wanted for ages? Is there something you’ve been trying to accomplish for ages without success? If you say you want wealth but aren’t yet wealthy or you’d adore love but are still lonely, Dr Demartini says that your beliefs and values are out of step with what you want. But this doesn’t mean that you can’t have it. He gives the example of someone who says they want money but keeps spending every penny they get on their child instead of saving and investing. This person’s hierarchy of values – which rules everything we do in life – puts money too far down on their list. Yet, he points out, if their child’s life was at risk and they needed to find £1m within 24 hours to save it, suddenly, that person would have the motivation they needed to get that money. Dr Demartini says you can change your values to fit with whatever you want by listing 100 (or more) reasons for having it. So using this example, the person might make a list for wealth that starts with: Provide secure future for children. • Leave children taken care of in case anything happens to me. • Provide good education for children as they get older. • Offer good role model for children of parent being able to earn good money through enjoyable and useful work. And so on… Then, even though money isn’t a huge motivation for this person, there’s enough incentive from the associated benefits to their children for them to go out and earn more money. Start with a large sheet of paper or a new document on your computer if that’s easier. Now list every single reason you can think of for bringing this success into your life. And watch your motivation levels soar.

charged, you’ve become blind to it. “The higher the ratio of emotions you put on someone, the more blinded you become. If you see something with a fairly mild ratio, it’s easy for your intuition to see it but if it’s highly charged, you’ve got to stop and ask questions to bring the balance back. Your intuition is trying to bring you into homeostasis to keep you centred but your emotions are polarising it. The Demartini Method does consciously what your intuition does unconsciously.” So rather than just trying to see the positive and ignoring all those clues from your intuition which can help you grow and develop and push further, pay attention to all your thoughts and feelings. Own everything and the emotional charge will dissipate.

Resources For more information about Dr John Demartini, The Demartini Method and his books and dvds, please visit www.drdemartini.com

Some of the proceeds from Dr Demartini’s workshops in Milton Keynes went to benefit the Association of Young People Living with M.E. For more information about AYME, please visit www.ayme.org.uk

For another approach to embracing your negative (and positive) characteristics, read Debbie Ford’s The Dark Side of Light Chasers.

For more information about Ardour UK events, visit www.Ardour-UK.co.uk

rapport - Spring 2008

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EDUCATION

How to Pass Exams,

Easily

By Michael Carroll NLP Master Trainer

A

re you the type of person that relishes the challenge an exam brings, or does the very word ‘test’ send you into a frenzy of worry? Many intelligent people simply freeze in exam situations and information that was readily available to the mind before the exam is suddenly locked away. In this article, I will outline easy to use NLP tools that, when adopted, will take the stress out of exams, making it easy to pass. As human beings we face our first tests at a very young age. Tasks like singing a song in front of relatives, performing the new dance manoeuvre in front of Mummy and Daddy and simple arithmetic and spelling tests are examples of early tests. Some children thrive on showing everyone how good they are and as a consequence grow older with a positive association to tests and exams. Others feel embarrassment, perhaps are ridiculed and end up with a negative association to tests. From the associations formed with early tests, we create generalisations that either support us in exam conditions or bring us out in a cold sweat. We create mental filters that mediate our experience, so in the present day state we run mental programmes as a result of the filtering of internal and external stimuli. The output will be exam anxiety or exam confidence (or perhaps somewhere in the middle) depending on the individual. Generally, anxiety and studying for exams do not go well together. However, according to Csikszentmihalyi (1990) a low level of anxiety, combined with focus and heightened awareness are components of a ‘flow’ state. However high levels of anxiety while revising or taking the test itself severely limits recall and flow of information I would suggest an overall strategy for

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passing exams that includes being aware of the bigger goal, visualising success, creating an optimal learning state, planning study and being a smart reviser. In the paragraphs below I will outline each step.

Get in touch with the big picture For many, exams are an aggravation that consume time and cause stress. This style of thinking causes you to mentally limit yourself on the hassles of the exam and preparation work. It’s better to think at a much higher level, and that is about what happens once you pass the exam. In the last issue of Rapport Magazine, I wrote about the goal beyond

the goal. Start to think about the benefits of passing the exam and what you can do with the qualification. Visualise the goal beyond the goal in the steps below to create some excitement and momentum. Create a positive future history (visualise success) Many people experience exam anxiety because they mentally picture the struggles they will experience with the exam and in some cases people imagine themselves failing and then wonder why they experience anxiety! You will reverse this process; you will create strong representations of passing, and set up in your circuitry what the legendary Muhammad Ali used to call a ‘future history’. Before you begin the revision process, get in your head what you are capable of doing here, and that is passing the exam. A visualisation process is helpful for this. Access your relaxed and open state (see paragraph below) and let your eyes close. Now create a movie or play in front of you. You are the star of this play, you are centre stage. The scene you are creating ahead shows you, in all your glory, having passed the exam. Notice all the qualities present in passing this exam. Now get a sense as you step into the scene, you see the world around you at the time of passing the exam you feel the feelings linked to passing. You are a success, you have passed. Now become the director of the movie. Mentally step back out of the experience and make any changes to the scene that will make it even more appealing and wind the clock forward so you can also see the goal beyond the goal, the benefits of passing this exam. Create an optimal learning state In NLP and particularly New Code NLP ‘state’ is a leverage point for altering behaviour. As I


EDUCATION

said, the state of anxiety causes mental blocks and is therefore not conducive for recalling information. The optimal state for recall and learning seems to include the qualities of relaxation, openness, and alertness. Here is a process to help you access an optimal state for revising and sitting the exam itself. It’s best if you sit in a comfortable chair, with both feet on the floor and with your hands resting gently in your lap.

twelve inches from the crown on your head, as if you are wearing a wizards hat (while remaining in peripheral vision). Learning researchers have discovered that holding your attention behind you on a fixed space helps to hold attention and increase recall. See PhotoReading (Scheele 2007) and Gift of Dyslexia (Davis 1997). Use this state or similar for revision, learning, and taking the exam. Plan your study Review all the material that is on the syllabus and likely to be in the exam. Chunk the material into topics and themes and create a revision timetable. If you have multiple exams, this is an important task to ensure you give sufficient times to key topics and subjects. When you are revising a subject or topic within the subject, stay on topic giving it your full attention, rather than drifting randomly through material. Be a smart reviser You know how you learn and remember best, use what has worked for you. Below are some smart revision tips: Take lots of breaks; Research has shown that time frames between 30 minutes to 45 minutes are optimal session for peak concentration. Longer sessions and your mind wanders. Use another part of your mind in the break, do a physical activity or mediation, so that you return to your studies refreshed. Use music, (if it helps you learn). Research has shown the rhythm of rock music and classical music helps people access an accelerated learning state. Take non-linear revision notes. Use lots of colours, symbols and acronyms. Mind maps, spider diagrams and shape charts are all useful. Use big sheets of paper. I suggest A1 poster size, for use as below: Decorate your bedroom with your posters; Take your Mind Maps (or other form of non linear notes) and stick them on your bedroom walls. Just as you tuck up in bed, review one poster. Close your eyes and picture it in your mind. When you wake up, picture it before you look at it. The next night repeat the process with another poster AND the one

Take lots of breaks; Research has shown that time frames between 30 minutes to 45 minutes are optimal session for peak concentration Focus attention by looking at spot ahead of you, perhaps on the wall. Adjust your breathing. Breathe in through your nose, hold, and exhale slowly through your mouth. The in/out breath ratio should be 1:2, meaning your out breath is twice as long as your in breath. Access peripheral vision. As you hold your attention on the spot on the wall, expand your visual awareness so that you are simultaneously aware of the area one metre either side of the spot while still being aware of the spot. Do this by expanding your visual attention without moving your eyes. Now expand your visual awareness further to so you are simultaneously aware of two metres either side of the spot while still being aware of the spot. Then expand your awareness so you are visually aware of everything ahead of you. (Optional) Focus your attention on the space

you did previously. So you can re-create your bedroom posters in your mind before the exam. Some people find linkage and association useful, including in the visualisation the other items in your bedroom and associating the items. Engage all the senses. Dance, sing, act, shout, do whatever you have to absorb the information at a deep level. All of the processes in this article are easy to implement with no formal NLP training. To really capture peak states of performance for exam passing, I would encourage people to learn New Code NLP and PhotoReading. New Code NLP has a series of games and principles designed to maximise unconscious performance. PhotoReadng is a system developed to use the whole mind for reading and assimilating the written word at amazingly fast speeds with heightened recall. Combining these two methodologies for exam passing gets excellent results. I would encourage every learner to follow the simple steps here to make exam passing easy. Be aware of the goal beyond the goal, create a positive future history, create a useful learning state, plan your study and be a smart reviser. Adapt the processes in this article to suit how you learn best. Enjoy passing those exams.

Michael Carroll

Founder and Course Director, NLP Academy www.nlpacademy.co.uk

About the author

Michael Carroll is the founder and course director of the NLP Academy and co-founder with John Grinder and Carmen Bostic St Clair of the International Trainers Academy of NLP. He is the only NLP Master Trainer in the world certified by John Grinder and Carmen Bostic St Clair and he continues to work closely with them in developing New Code NLP processes and streamlining the classic code patterns.

References

Csikszentmihalyi M (1990). The Psychology of Optimal Experience. New York, Haper Collins Scheele, P. (2007). PhotoReading, Minneapolis, Learning Strategies Corporation Davis, R and Braun, E.M (1997) The Gift of Dyslexia: Why Some of the Brightest People Can’t Read and How They Can Learn. Perigee Books

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INTERNATIONAL

BOSNIA

by Eve Menezes Cunningham

L

ast year, I got the opportunity to go to Bosnia to do some voluntary work with an organisation called Phoenix Aid. Sarah Greenwood and Karen Tinker run this registered charity from their Yorkshire base. Karen says, “Sarah started Phoenix [Aid] in response to the need she saw here when she was working with another charity which only delivered treatments. She felt that if Bosnian nationals were trained in therapies, they could carry on the work that this other charity did for six months of the year, all year round and also eventually reach the number of people needing help. So Sarah began a 5-6 year plan of training and expansion into other areas of Bosnia. I joined in 2004, just after Phoenix was inaugurated and we have worked together to achieve this goal.” For Karen, there have been many highlights. She says, “The first was when we completed the first massage therapy training, which I taught. The feeling of satisfaction to be well on the road to what we wanted was fantastic. The students, ranging from homeopaths, doctors, unemployed people and ex-soldiers were so enthusiastic and immediately wanted more. That put us on a great ‘high’.” She also remembers, “doing metamorphic technique on a young boy, about 7 years old. He had been diagnosed as autistic and was not willing/able to communicate with anyone. He really was in a world of his own, even to the point of not coming near us for treatment. We used another therapist as a surrogate and I worked metamorphic on him, along with another MT technician. The result from that first treatment was astounding. He became pleasantly ‘hyperactive’ playing with toys in the centre we worked in. He also answered me when I spoke to him. He then began to communicate with his father. He would do as his parents asked, but without communication. He began to play

and interact with other children at the centre and also began to talk with the staff there. All this from one surrogated treatment.” Karen is delighted by “the improvements we have seen in the ex-services people and concentration camp victims we have treated.” They’ve had reports that symptoms such as nightmares, flashbacks, tremors and depression have “drastically reduced and stopped. 7 people, particularly, all found their conditions much improved. Those who had felt suicidal were less so or not at all. This was all from aromatherapy work. The women in particular had suffered some of the worst forms of abuse and some have seen their children killed and raped. The men often suffered from survivor guilt as well as the depression from the simple fact of having had to kill to survive, having seen family members die before them and seeing best friends die.” Other volunteers visited orphanages and hospitals to offer complementary therapies. I was there for just under a week and ran two courses for students who wanted to learn how to use crystals for meditation and self healing. While I wasn’t teaching anyone about NLP, I use it with all my work and it was invaluable for me. Funding is an ongoing concern for Phoenix

If Bosnian nationals were trained in therapies, they could carry on the work that this other charity did for six months of the year, all year round and also eventually reach the number of people needing help

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Aid, their students and their clients. Karen says, “I have taken paying clients whilst here just to pay for food when we haven’t raised enough money.” She is also keen to encourage other organisations and individuals to help. She says, “From the first teaching, the work has developed into our bringing other UK therapists to deliver treatments. We have expanded into working with homes for the congenitally disabled/challenged as well as with war victims, whom we treat in the flat. And we work at day care centres for mentally and physically challenged people. We are still teaching and we bring other teachers over for therapies I don’t teach. “This year, we are going north of Sarajevo (Banja Vrucica and Tesanj) to teach massage and metamorphic technique to more people, following a successful teaching trip last October in massage techniques. “Sarah has also instigated and implemented the opening of the first Riding for the Disabled scheme at Kakrinje. The opening was attended by several foreign diplomats and government officials. It is a very well attended scheme and the staff were given some instruction by Liz Ellis, a top UK trainer for riding for the disabled. Sarah has instigated an equine facilitated learning scheme, too.” This has been very popular and effective. Karen hopes to “set up a formal school of excellence in training of bodywork/ holistic therapies/energy healing and energy psychology therapies with international qualifications as well as local Bosnian qualifications.”

Would you like to help? Phoenix Aid are especially keen to involve teachers and therapists who offer treatments such as reflexology and massage as language is much less of a barrier. But the translators are amazing and even though I knew no Bosnian, I was amazed by the amount I understood through body language and tone – NLP in action. If you want to volunteer or donate money, find out more and contact Karen or Sarah through www.phoenix-aid.org


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CELEBRITY

EXTREME SUCCESS Entrepreneur Al Gosling is doing what he loves and making money too by Caitlin Collins

I

confess I was a little anxious about interviewing entrepreneur Al Gosling, high-energy founder of the Extreme Group of businesses. In preparation for the interview I had checked out his website and googled him. Irritated by the relentless perkiness of what I was reading, I found myself looking for differences between him and me. They were easy to spot: Him: 37, lots of energy, lots of money, super sporty, mega macho man dashing about in cars and planes; Me: 50, less energy, less money, resolutely flat-footed, grumpy old woman gazing out of my office window at the rural peace of Exmoor national park while doodling cross little notes along the lines of ‘Doesn’t this fellow know there’s an energy crisis? Has he never heard of sustainability?’ I admit it: I was prejudiced against him. How wrong I was. Modelling excellence NLP is founded on the idea of modelling ‘excellence’. What is it that enables somebody to be not just good at what they do, but absolutely brilliant? How can we capture its essence, bottle it up, and make it available to others? Of course, how we judge someone’s success will vary. For example, we may admire somebody who has the Midas touch with money; however, if we look beyond the outer wealth, we may find him to be an unhappy person, driven to pursue material gain at the cost of emotional and spiritual wellbeing. If so, we’ll want to exercise caution in how we model his methods, lest we get the misery along with the money. The thing about Al Gosling is that not only does he demonstrate the Midas principle big time, he also comes across as a truly happy man. The Extreme Group is a rapidly expanding collection of 20 companies spanning media (a TV channel, magazine publishing, a mobile phone network), sports and equipment retail, drinks retail, a clothing label, hotels and travel. The principles of thinking big, aiming high, and doing things differently characterise the success of this multi-million pound empire, which started life in a converted barn in Essex, brain-child of a 24 year old surfer boy with sand on his feet and a determination to avoid the straitjacket of the business suit.

Passion ‘I was looking for a way to combine my passion for extreme sports with my need to earn a living,’ explains Al. ‘Skiing’s the big one for me: chasing deep powder. Also windsurfing and flying. Those moments when it all falls away and you’re left in that moment, where it makes it all worthwhile. You take that moment and that passion and that drive and you translate that into your life and your work and it’s incredibly powerful. You get a team who share your passion and you can move mountains.’ With that passion as his driving force, Al set about building the team who would help him move mountains. He relies on them totally. ‘I value my independence and I like to do things my way, but I also rely on other people. I’ve been let down a few times, and I’ve learned to be careful who I trust – and I have complete trust in the team I have now. I pick people I enjoy working with and I learn from them. I like bringing in other entrepreneurs and helping to create value and wealth and enjoyment for them as well as for us. All our companies have been built like that – and start-ups aren’t easy, but it’s worked. I like to put big responsibility onto young people and then let them learn; they make mistakes, and that’s OK – you only learn by working it through for yourself.’

You get a team who share your passion and you can move mountains

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CELEBRITY

Toughness and resilience underlie an endearing faith in basic goodness. ‘I look from a positive perspective and I expect people to be good – although of course we all know that’s not always the case! But I believe there’s good in people and I try to find it. I’ve been burnt badly a few times, but I work hard and when I’ve been hit I’ve fought back and worked through it. Sometimes it’s been skin-of-the-teeth stuff but I’ve managed to get through.’ Compassion Al has noticed himself becoming less materialistic as he gets older. ‘It’s more about building and creating than just making money. And other people’s happiness matters. It’s important to me to make sure that everyone I work with is happy; and, if anyone has a problem, the door is open and we’ll help with whatever resources we can offer.’ American philanthropist Chuck Feeney is his hero. ‘He gave his money away without shouting about it. I think that’s great. As you grow older, these ideas form; it’s part of maturing. I’d like to know that whatever I’d earned was being put to good use when I leave the planet.’ This concern for others manifests in Al’s voluntary work with young people, visiting schools and colleges as an inspirational speaker. ‘I love talking to students,’ he says. ‘I talk about who we are and what we’ve done and it’s exciting and inspiring for them. I also talk a lot about where we’ve screwed up. Entrepreneurs sometimes only talk about what’s gone well; I tell them about the mistakes we made and how we turned them around. If we can inspire a couple of people, that’s brilliant. Young people now are more socially aware than I was at 18, but they’re still very materialistic. What you look like matters to them; I think the media drives that. I try to get across that you have to believe wholeheartedly in

yourself, what you’re doing, who you are, and that you can do it – you have to keep going until you find a way to make it work. But I also make the point that it’s not enough just to make lots of money – it’s important not to sacrifice your integrity.’ So, if we’re modelling Mr Gosling, along with noting all the entrepreneurial attributes of energy, drive, passion, persistence and selfbelief, can we point to altruism as the key that enables him to do what he does so well and be happy too? I’m reminded of an incident on a course I was leading some years ago, when participants were engaged in an exercise exploring what motivated them in their lives. Among them was a tough-looking chap, determinedly clad in motorbike leathers throughout a warm summer weekend, whose robust and stroppy attitude had been challenging the sweetness and light of his New Age fellows. To the surprise of his partner in the exercise, the motorbike man suddenly burst into tears. Sobbing unashamedly, he glared round at the room and roared, ‘It’s bloody compassion isn’t it? Makes the whole bloody thing work! That’s why I effing get up in the morning!’ Or, as Al himself says, more moderately: ‘Individualistic and altruistic? I hope so. I know I’m selfish and I know I can be difficult. But I honestly strive to be there for others.’ Then the irrepressible surfer bobs back up, just having a ball: ‘Along the way I’ve made lots of friends, and lots of money – but, regardless of the money, when I wake up in the morning, it’s fun! There’ve been bad times, as with anything, but I still think Wow!’ And even this grumpy old woman couldn’t be so churlish as to grump at that.

I believe there’s good in people and I try to find it

For more information about Al Gosling see www.extremeinternational.com

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BUSINESS

NOW is the place for Women who mean Business Dee Shipman is on a campaign to change how women are perceived in business and it isn’t just the male culture of business that she has to overcome. Over years of coaching and working with women in business, she has to admit reluctantly that the glass ceiling does exist and that at least some of the reason for that comes from the women themselves. Karen Moxom talks to her

D

ee Shipman has been a writer for as long as she can remember and has specialised in lyric writing, working with Roger Webb, Charles Aznavour and Petula Clark. She still writes all Charles Aznavour’s English lyrics. They are adaptations rather than translations, she says “I don’t speak fluent French but I do speak fluent Aznavour”. It is in her role as an NLP Master Coach, Trainer and Master Practitioner and co-founder of New Oceans that she has been talking to Rapport. “I want to improve the way that women are valued in the workplace”, she tells us. New Oceans Women (NOW) is the result. “I have been involved in a lot of training and coaching within corporates and I still find that women have real problems and challenges within business”. While there are external factors involved, she is adamant that “a lot of the problem exists within the psyche of women themselves. It is the belief system of women about themselves and their place in the world that often causes careers to stall”. She adds, “This is not about feminism and not about bra burning. It is about helping women to get the recognition they deserve in a business context.” “The issues that she sees relate to self-esteem, culture and inherited history. It is a matter of what they believe (and have been told) they can or cannot do and what is “right” for women to do”. Dee uses a story to illustrate what it is that

she means. “As a child I can remember one occasion when we were sitting around a table as a family and I noticed that my mother had no chicken on her plate. When I asked why that was, my mother replied that she had decided not to eat meat any more. The truth was – guess what – that there was not enough to go round and she felt that it was her place to go without. That thinking is still there and women often place themselves at the bottom

individuals but Dee recognises that change has to come at a cultural level. “It is about valuing everybody including, and perhaps especially, the women themselves”. To begin with, it is how women talk to themselves that matters. “The internal conversation is the most important conversation in society. If they focus on what they don’t want, there is a danger that they get exactly what they don’t want more of the time”. Worse, she continues, “negative self talk leads to low self-esteem, and low self esteem can lead to the body allowing in infections and other illnesses which can lead to exhaustion and make matters worse”. As well as coaching individuals, NOW is also going into companies – some of them very large – and talking to their women’s groups, “which many companies now have”. There they present a 3 hour session on empowering women in business which includes modules on how the mind works and begins to install anchors for the YES/NO issue and for overcoming the fear of rejection. “Fearing rejection is a cultural thing, I believe. Women were possessions for a very long time and this has changed relatively recently. Women feel that if they say no they will be rejected and find themselves out on the street”. NOW is also addressing business leaders. “In working with what is still primarily a male culture, it is about changing a situation where women have to become pseudo-men in order to succeed and many just don’t bother. There is

This is not about feminism and not about bra burning. It is about helping women to get the recognition they deserve in a business context

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of the list when it comes to priority”. Dee feels that some women find that “it is easier to say no to yourself rather than to say no to others”. There is a generational change happening, though. “Younger women are not standing for that sort of behaviour and are prepared to work for and fight for what they want. Change is happening but I’d like to see more change happening more quickly.” Some women who are in business or wanting to go back into work find themselves with problems around self belief. “People won’t fight if they don’t believe in what they are fighting for and so women don’t fight for their own rights”. NOW is beginning by working with


BUSINESS

such a waste of talent in that process.” Dee is proposing an alternative approach. “It could be made much more acceptable to be a woman in business through a simple reframe. Instead of viewing what women bring into the workplace as negative. Businesses can consider the ‘microclimate’ that women bring with them to be a positive benefit. Whilst men leave their private life at the office door, women bring all of themselves to the workplace and that can be a strength. Women are capable of multitasking – they use the unconscious mind to process a lot of things at the same time. They are also great at being creative in practical terms, they make wherever they are ‘home’ and if they feel ‘right’ about where they are, nothing stops them being the best they can be. Women can also pick up on group emotions and they empathise in a different kind of way to men”. Business can use this by getting them to take action upon the feelings they pick up and express that back to the group in a positive and progressive way. By synergising – where the whole is so much greater than the sum of the parts – the real force of energy is directed towards a common outcome which leads to action. Dee empahsises that this is not about equality. Men and women are individuals and it is about respecting the fact that, as individuals, they are different and honouring that. “Business leaders need to work with the person who just happens

to be a woman and works out how to use everything that is there – maybe using empathy, rapport and honouring the other person’s map of the world. Maybe the organisation doesn’t have one single map but an atlas and everybody’s map is equally important in the organisation’s success. To manage an organisation is to be able to read many maps and integrate them together”. Which implies that business leaders need to change and maybe female leaders would be well suited to this style of leadership. Dee favours a team leadership approach. “There is a difference between a team and a group of people just working together. In a team the individuals are using their strengths together in order to achieve. Many businesses take people on for their strengths but then immediately train them to overcome their weaknesses. Instead of that, why not identify their strengths and let them work within them, passing areas of weakness on to someone who has strengths in that area. Research suggests that for the average worker only 17% of the day is actually involved in using their strengths. If we can improve on that it will be better for business and of course far better for the individuals concerned”. She recognises that there are companies who are already doing this, many of them in the USA, but a lot of work is needed. “At all levels of training and coaching we are working with the person and if that person’s map is not productive, then that is an opportunity lost for the business and

the person. Women have an extra layer of cultural, learned and inherited behaviours which despite our desire to believe that they have gone away, have not.” There is a culture of conformity in business, Dee believes. “Rising beyond middle management in business is about matching with the corporate culture and expectations. Mismatchers very often find that they have to leave the organisation at the middle management level whereas if the organisation was prepared to be more flexible and play to their strengths, they may thrive, the business could tap into more creativity and there will be less need for this work”. She recognises, though, that there is much still to be done and that “one person can’t reach everybody that needs to be reached and certainly not in a timely way. I want there to be more of it and, at the same time, less need for it. One of my conditions of coaching is that the tools that I give to my client should be taken on and used to help at least one other person. The best way to learn is to teach someone else”. The best companies will be the ones where male and female attributes are in balance. Dee is clearly passionate about achieving that balance and, with her track record, who would bet against her succeeding? New Oceans Women is always looking for more people to join them. Find out more at http://www. new-oceans.co.uk/new/now/index.htm.

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HEALTH

ALLERGIES AND NLP IS IT SAFE TO RISK IT? by Eve Menezes Cunningham

A

s an NLP and EFT Practitioner, I know that both techniques can help people with allergies. But as someone with a severe allergy to peppers, I’m especially concerned about the risks. I don’t remember ever eating peppers as a child but, as a teenager, if there were any peppers in my food, I would be sick. I’d also be sick if someone was cooking peppers and the smell was too strong. When I’ve accidentally had a tiny trace (when it has been on the plate or the wrong cutlery has been used) I’ve ended up feeling as if I’m about to die. My head, mouth and throat swell up and it’s taken up to 48 hours to feel OK again. I’ve never been hospitalised and know that peppers are much easier to avoid than nuts but it does make eating out awkward. So the idea of getting rid of my allergy is appealing but I don’t think I’d ever risk eating anything with

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peppers in it. Still, it would be brilliant to not have such strong reactions. Then again, the strength of these involuntary reactions is useful in that it’s probably what’s kept me out of hospital. Nuts don’t smell very strongly and I have a friend who has eaten quite large quantities unknowingly (resulting in lots of time in hospital). INLPTA Trainer, Bob Roberts, MBE, says, “Allergies are to do with the immune system getting out of control. Our unconscious mind has control over our immune system. As we know, when we’re run down and stressed out, we’re more likely to get a cold, because the stress has depressed our immune system defences. Logically, it follows that as NLP has techniques to connect with and influence our unconscious mind, then NLP techniques can also be a way to directly influence our immune system.” Muriel Simmons, Chief Executive of medical charity Allergy UK, is far from convinced. She says, “I can understand how it could help in cases of intolerance but where the immune system is involved, as it is in an allergic reaction, it’s highly dangerous to mess round with that. People could die. NLP could assist someone with a true allergic reaction in helping them to cope.” I know that in the years since I started coaching and using NLP, I’ve felt more much more resourceful when it comes to going out for meals and stating my needs more assertively. Muriel says, “There has to be an acceptance that there isn’t a cure for allergies at all. The nearest hope we have is for people suffering from hayfever and that’s immunotherapy. By steadily increasing dose of the allergen you’re allergic to – e.g., grass and cats. At one time, it meant going into hospital for weekly

or monthly injections. It is reckoned to stop the allergy for five years and by this time, the immune system has usually righted itself.” Muriel is highly allergic to garlic. She says, “It is used in so many things and so commonly used that it makes eating out a nightmare. And as it is not one of the most common allergens, I go round the supermarket with a magnifying glass. I pre-order meals when I can from restaurants.” June Sayer runs the Sunningdale Complementary Health & Training Centre in Southend on Sea, Essex and offers allergy and intolerance testing. She says, “Testing for intolerances with the Vegatest machine is a painless, non-invasive procedure. The client holds a cylindrical electrode in one hand and the practitioner holds a pen-type stylus. Light pressure is applied to an acupuncture point on the client’s finger or toe initially identifying their neutral reading. Because an allergy is caused by an abnormally high response of the immune system, we have found that using a combination of homoeopathic remedies and nutritional advice, our clients report a reduction in their sensitivity.” June doesn’t recommend this for children under 8, pregnant patients or anyone with a pacemaker. She also warns that being dehydrated can skew results. Rob Mesrie of Allergy Alternatives is an NLP Master Practitioner and a member of the Institute for Advanced Studies of Health (IASH) and The Prince’s Foundation for Integrated Health. He has been helping people with allergies since 2003. Rob says, “There are various medical tests – blood tests, RAST tests and others – that indicate whether there is an allergy or not. They are only indicators but I have to recommend that those who used to have severe


HEALTH

“I work from an Integrated Medical Centre for added ease of mind. I always advise clients to test safely. If there is a risk of anaphylactic shock then being tested in the presence of a doctor or allergy clinic might be appropriate.” Rob

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HEALTH

conditions are tested by allergy medics. But the real proof is in the pudding – when a person (accidentally or otherwise) actually comes into contact with the allergen. Often, medical tests show whether there are antibodies in the blood. When a person who was allergic to egg has an omelette and is OK, this is the real proof as to NLP’s ability to make a difference. “Before beginning to look at the concept of an NLP intervention, it is important to get a basic understanding of what goes on in the immune system when a person has an allergic reaction. Allergies are a response by the immune system to a perceived threat. That threat isn’t as real as one might think. Dr Michael Levi described an allergy as a ‘phobic’ response of the immune system. And as we

When I asked Rob about the caution needed and explained my own allergy and anaphylactic shock reactions even when a pepper has just touched my plate, he responded, “Hmmm - am I smelling the tails of a limiting belief ?” And I agree to a degree. But while it’s a limiting belief that I feel is very useful for me, I also think the work being done with less severe allergies is quite inspiring. And Rob’s not cavalier about the risks. He says, “You are right that allergies should be approached with caution. I work from an Integrated Medical Centre for added ease of mind. I always advise clients to test safely. If there is a risk of anaphylactic shock then being tested in the presence of a doctor or

“I can understand how it could help in cases of intolerance but where the immune system is involved, as it is in an allergic reaction, it’s highly dangerous to mess round with that. People could die. NLP could assist someone with a true allergic reaction in helping them to cope.” Muriel know, NLP has great ways of dealing with phobias. “So an allergy occurs when the immune system detects what is perceived as a threat and then fights against it. The rash, swelling and all the symptoms are a result of this (excessive) reaction of the body to a perceived threat. If we change the perception of an allergen so that the body thinks of it as safe rather than harmful, then there is no more allergy and no more allergic response. “The Fast Allergy Process was designed by Robert Dilts, Tim Hallbom and Suzi Smith to teach the immune system to behave more rationally. At the heart of a process is an anchor collapse. Although the process itself is rather simple, there are a few things that can get in the way. I find the biggest of these is a belief that allergies are somehow untreatable, ‘beyond help’ or ‘beyond nlp’. “This is constantly reinforced by the media and the medical profession. So the whole idea that an allergy can be treated (let alone the concept that there are no drugs, injections or the like), can be hard to believe. So often the first step is loosening a clients model of the world and transforming their limiting beliefs.”

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allergy clinic might be appropriate. With most clients, touching the allergen on the back of the hand might be a good first start. Then on the inside of the wrist, the outer lip, inner lip etc. For some, it may never be appropriate to test. “One GP I worked with used to have reactions to mushrooms that were so severe that he would collapse unconscious in excruciating pain within minutes. Testing medically seemed like an appropriate step after our work. Before he had a chance to do the formal testing however, he was accidentally given soup containing mushrooms. It was only when he found some at the bottom of his bowl that he realised his mistake. Fortunately for him, the process had worked well and was a great convincer. In the process itself, its advisable to disassociate or double disassociate to make sure that it goes ahead safely.” While I had assumed that it would be much easier to work with food intolerances than allergies, Rob says, “Food intolerances are a very different type of immune response to a food allergy. It’s called an IgG rather than IgE response. To be honest, I don’t find one easier than the other to work with. You are still

changing the response ‘from that’ to ‘this’. “The only difference in the way I treat it is around the framing and the strength of the belief that this is a condition that can be treated. For a severe allergic response, ironically this is a good sign that the immune system is strong. Unfortunately it’s just a little misguided. “Be honest with yourself about any beliefs you may have around letting go of your allergy. Is it possible? Is it possible for you? Could it be easy? Your immune system learns new behaviours by itself every day. We are just giving it one extra lesson. Go through the process either with another practitioner or on your own. Suzi Smith has some CDs to lead you through the process and I’m recording a DVD. I have found the NLP Health Practitioner Course to be invaluable in my work with allergies and also with health issues in general. Test your results with an imaginary allergen. The success of the process is about treating the cause rather that the symptoms. If you really want to be of service, however, you might want to work with the cause of the cause - the cause of the conditions that led to the immune confusion. “Often, with food intolerances, there is a long term emotional need that isn’t being met. So as well as collapsing the anchor, it is important to address this and give strategies for meeting this need in the future.” Rob gives the example of an unusual allergy: “I once had a woman come to me with an allergy to ice cream. Not milk - just ice cream! When I asked her what would happen if she let go of her allergy, she told me she would devour ice cream and put on several stone. With that she got up and ran (before we had a chance to explore other possibly better strategies for staying thin).”

Resources Steve Andreas has produced a video demonstrating interventions with wheat intolerance. Visit www.steveandreas.com For information and support about allergies, visit www.allergyuk.org/ Contact Rob Mesrie through his website www. allergy-alternatives.com Read Beliefs: Pathways to Health and Wellbeing by Robert Dilts, Tim Hallbom and Suzi Smith. Find out more about allergy testing with June at www.sunningdalecentre.co.uk


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COACHING

Do you have a good

Work-Life balance? by Eve Menezes Cunningham

W

hen you’re out of balance, you’ll have symptoms but you may not necessarily recognise it as a simple need to tweak things. This is your life and you are the only one who can decide what’s important and what’s not. Work/life Balance sounds simple but it’s an ongoing challenge for most people. From statistics about people missing work through stress to mothers alternatively being told they should be working outside the home and then that they shouldn’t do anything but be a mum, work/life balance issues regularly make headlines. Yet the right balance for one woman and her family would be completely wrong for another. Fathers struggle with it, too. Many men put in all the hours available at work to earn as much as

possible to support their families. They then miss out on valuable bonding time as babies grow up and move away. But like mothers, every father needs to make the right choice for him and his family rather than caving in to other people’s judgments about what he “should” be doing.

Do the things that are important today. Tomorrow might be too late and your grandchildren may be grown up and gone

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Even if you don’t have a family and children, life can be a huge juggling act. I work from home and balance my coaching and writing work in a way that works really well for me. I usually make time for friends and family as well as regular swimming, yoga, cycling and general life. But things are never static and one of the

most important things NLP has taught me is the need for flexibility. Take a little time each evening to reflect on the day. What went well? What could you have done differently to help you feel more balanced? By noticing things you can change tomorrow, you’ll be constantly bringing more equilibrium into your life. My current schedule is manic. I had a house fire a few weeks ago and between dealing with all the debris, sorting things out, cleaning them, dealing with the insurance, builders and so on while meeting my deadlines and other work commitments, tonight will be my first evening “off ” since it happened. And part of me feels that I should cancel. That when I finish work, I should go back home (I’m temporarily living across the street) and sort out ____, ____ and _____. The other day, I started at 6.30am and didn’t stop until after midnight. But I know that this chaos is temporary and that, ultimately, things will be nicer. It’s at the stage now where I feel much better about all the progress.


COACHING

Sue Cotter is the Central Essex Regional Director for the Athena Network. She also runs www.womensbusinesscoaching.co.uk. Sue says, “If someone wants to work 24/7 and doesn’t have family and likes doing that, then that’s fine. I used to feel guilty for not working. When you’re running your own business, you’ve got so much you want to achieve that it’s hard. It’s not like shutting an office door at 5pm on a Friday night.” For long term balance, Sue says, “Do the things that are important today. Tomorrow might be too late and your grandchildren may be grown up and gone. Think of the whole jigsaw puzzle of your life.” When you’re out of balance, you’ll have symptoms but you may not necessarily recognise it as a simple need to tweak things. You may find yourself snapping at people when normally, you couldn’t be more gracious. You’ll then probably snap at yourself for being so grumpy. But if you can just notice “Oh, I’m feeling especially snappy today, I’ll definitely take a lunch break tomorrow…”, you’ll get yourself back into resourcefulness and balance much more easily. You’ll also probably be noticing strained relationships at home or work or both depending on where the neglect is most apparent. If you don’t deal with imbalances early, you’ll have to handle more serious consequences like burnout, addictions, ill health. Some people only find balance after illnesses. With difficult decisions, use your NLP. Future Pace the results of the decisions you’re struggling with. How will you feel about saying Yes (or No) tomorrow? Next week? Next month? In a year? A decade? This will help you prioritise what’s really important. Life can be incredibly hectic but, if you’re doing things – with your family, at home and at work – that energise you, everyone will benefit. Where things are draining, take it as a sign that something needs to give. Yes, everyone needs to make certain compromises but you have more choices about the way you live your life than you probably realise. Think about the times when time has just flown by because you’ve been so engrossed in whatever you’ve been doing (whether that was baking cookies with your children or fishing or an aspect of your job). How can you create more time for this kind of activity? When was the last time you used the Wheel of Life yourself ? Try it now and see what comes up. Rating different areas (fun, career,

wealth, family, spirituality, personal development, love and health) using a scale of one to ten is a great quick way to measure balance overall. Are you tempted to dismiss certain areas? (Do you think, ‘Fun? Work is fun! I don’t need more fun!’) This is your life and you are the only one who can decide what’s important and what’s not. If some of the categories feel irrelevant to you, amend it so it reflects the kind of balance you’d like. Things will depend on the stage of life you’re at, too. If you’re in a new relationship, the Love area may rank much more highly than the staid job you’ve been meaning to do something about for years. And, again, rather than getting tangled up in other people’s ideas of work / life definition, think about your own. To help you do this, create an Ideal Schedule and account for every single hour in the week (including weekends, evenings and at night when you’re asleep). How much sleep do you need as a rule? How much time do you want to be spending at home with your family? What does your perfect weekend look like? What kind of work days would eliminate any need for your snooze button? What do you currently spend most of your time and energy dealing with? Is this a good balance or can you immediately think of an area that needs more attention? When you think about letting this area slide into deeper neglect, does that feel OK or do you realise that you ought to start taking steps now before your work / relationship / health / financial or other situation deteriorates beyond quick repair? Another tool you can use is the Vision Board. Gather together pictures, photographs and inspirational words that reflect the kind of work life balance you’d like. When you’ve finished it, put it somewhere to help bring more balance into your life. So if you’re currently spending too much time at home and are longing for a career boost, keeping it in the kitchen may be a better reminder than allowing it to gather dust in your home office. Or if you haven’t seen your kids for ages, including them in your vision board and hanging it (discreetly if you share the space) at work will help you get home to tuck them Sign up for free confidence tips at www.applecoaching.com into bed.

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NLP

FLIGHT OF THE SEA EAGLE Susanna Bellini’s NLP and energy-work with animals by Caitlin Collins

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e humans are paradoxical creatures. Our longing for security leads us to build up our self-identity and self-importance to the extent that people commonly speak in dualistic terms of Humans and the Environment, or Humans and Nature, conveying a sense of separation from the rest of the world and also from our fellow sentient beings (who are apparently part of the Environment, along with rocks and rainforests). According to students of deep ecology, it’s this fundamental illusion of human disconnection that underpins the pathology of our exploiting whatever is perceived as ‘other’ – including not only the non-human beings with whom we share the world, but also the environment upon which we all depend for our survival. Thus our attempts to seek security are actually threatening our lives. As continuing the current policy of exploitation won’t be an option for much longer – at least not on this planet – addressing this phenomenon of human disconnection is becoming a priority of the utmost urgency. Of course, there is already a longstanding tradition of understanding our place alongside our fellow beings in our global home. Traditional shamanic knowledge and practices have taken a trampling under the boots of Western civilisation’s march of progress; however there is now a resurgence of interest in these areas. The past 10 years have also seen a rapid growth of interest in connecting deeply with animals in non-exploitative ways that honour animals and recognise them as sentient beings in their own right.

doesn’t overtly teach, including energy work,’ she says. ‘And, as with many great teachers and healers, he’s tapping into something greater than himself. Training with him helped me to model my shamanic teachers, and also helped me learn to keep track of and operate on different levels of consciousness simultaneously.’ The bird who was frightened of flying Susanna describes a case history in which she used a combination of NLP and shamanic methods to help a bird with a fear of flying – or, more accurately, a fear of flying under certain conditions. A young sea eagle, kept with other birds of prey by a falconer, had been flying in displays in front of large crowds. Following an incident in which some children threw gravel at him the bird, very sensibly, had become reluctant to fly in displays if children were present. Two immediate problems were obvious: Susanna couldn’t communicate with the eagle in words, and he was too fierce to approach or touch. She needed methods she could use from a safe distance! ‘If he were a human, I’d simply ask him to think of whatever was bothering him,’ says Susanna. ‘Then I’d look for where the thought was spatially located – perhaps by observing a change in the energy or aura around him, or feeling temperature changes in the aura with my hands, or sensing something in my own body that might correlate with his experience. I could clear the negative thought form in various ways, for example by directing healing energy through my hands to heal it. Then of course I could ask him to notice the changes, and he might straighten up, or smile, and say, “It’s gone”. But I couldn’t very well verbally ask the eagle to “think of the problem”! I had to do it differently. So I drew on my knowledge of shape-shifting.’ Shape-shifting, Susanna explains, is a bit like the NLP method of deep trance identification (DTI). Using DTI, you might think of someone from whom you’d like to learn, imagine that person to be in front of you, and, after requesting and receiving permission, imagine yourself somehow merging, temporarily, with him or her. DTI can thus enable you to gain insights from experiencing being ‘as if ’ you were that person. In this instance of shape-shifting with the eagle, Susanna was sensitive to his response as she asked his permission to enter his space and slowly began to extend her energy to where she felt his energy field begin. ‘He noticed this,’ she reports. ‘I was respectful and gentle and he kept still and let me get on with the process.’ Susanna gradually merged part of her energy field and sensory awareness with the bird’s, while keeping

Needing methods I could use from a safe distance... I drew on my knowledge of shape-shifting

NLP and shamanism Some promising links between shamanic wisdom and NLP are emerging. Susanna Bellini is one of the pioneering bridge-builders here in the UK. An NLP Trainer who has modelled the extended sensory perception skills and energy healing methods of shamans and other energy workers, she is developing her abilities to work on energetic levels with humans and animals alike. Susanna explains that a shaman can function as a link between worlds, for example between the spiritual and the mundane, or plants and humans, or different levels of consciousness. The shaman is able to visit different realms in order to gain knowledge and to bring about changes that will affect our own day-to-day reality. Susanna had been unclear about how to bring her NLP practice and her shamanic work together until she spent a year training as an apprentice with Richard Bandler, one of the founders of NLP. ‘Dr Bandler is working on deep levels and making use of lots of stuff he

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NLP

some of her awareness back in her own body. ‘I experienced changes in my senses. My vision became sharper, clearer, aware of the slightest movement. I became hyper-alert – relaxed, but poised for action. My impressions were fast, with a straight visual to action pattern. I could see some children in the distance and I tried to nudge the eagle into the emotional state he had associated with them by intensifying the visual images of children and gravel in his mind.’ Next, moving her awareness back to her own position, outside the eagle, Susanna noticed where the energy form for the distressing experience was located in his energy field. Sight being the strongest sense for an eagle, she cleared the thought-form by visualisation. Lastly, she checked out her work by shifting back into the bird and looking at the children again. This time the eagle seemed to be more relaxed about them. The final step was to test results in a ‘live’ situation. ‘When the time came for the next flying display,’ Susanna recalls, ‘the falconer strode into the arena, checked the crowd, checked the wind and weather and looked over his birds of prey, who were ranged on perches behind the audience seating. There were some school children present, and, he told me later, he had already decided not to fly the sea eagle when something about the state of the bird attracted his attention. He looked at the bird, then at the children, who were sitting quietly – and decided to fly the eagle after all. The eagle flew beautifully! The falconer said that he just had a feeling it was time to try flying him again!’ Wider awareness Susanna believes that connecting with animals like this can bring about profound changes in the human participants of such interactions. ‘Working with animals changes the way you are,’ she says. ‘It opens you up to a wider awareness. We all have consciousness; we’re all conscious beings. And in recognising that, you realise why you shouldn’t harm other beings. And as you begin to become sensitive to energy and feel it as a truth, so you realise that how you think matters! There’s so much to be concerned about in the world, and while some things are getting better it’s also true that some are getting worse. Those who have the tools to do something for good in the world need to be doing it. And as I say that, I also have to say that this sort of work is not about ego, and it’s not really about “doing”. It’s about “allowing”, and knowing that you’re a part of a greater energy, a kind of universal consciousness. It’s about moving towards authentic being. Many people now believe that this is a crucial time for raising consciousness and moving humanity to another level, and I think this sort of work is part of that movement.’ One of the strengths of NLP is its absence of rigid theoretical frameworks: this openness allows it to be flexible and adaptable and

make itself useful in many applications. Combining NLP with energy work, as Susanna is doing, seems to me to be a particularly fruitful field of endeavour. In providing effective ways to communicate beyond the restrictions of verbal language, it not only allows us to ‘talk with the animals’ but also to connect with humans for whom verbal language is not an option. We need connection in every way in our world today, connection at the deepest levels, to heal the wounds of severance that manifest not only internally in the inner turmoil of our own psyches, and externally in our quarrels and wars, but, crucially, in our self-imposed distancing from the rest of the universe of which each of us is really just as much a natural part as the rivers and the rocks, the stars, the trees, the oceans – and the animals.

Susanna Bellini is based in York. To find out more about her work and about her Shamanix™ training courses visit www.bronze-dragon.com

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ANLP DEVELOPMENT

ANLP International Ambassador

Robert Smith As ANLP grows its international presence, Robert Smith, a highly regarded NLP trainer, has been chosen to be the international ambassador. Andy Coote talks to him

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obert’s international experience and his extensive knowledge of NLP were important factors in the choice,” comments Managing Director, Karen Moxom. “He seems to be the ideal person to fill a role that will become more important as we seek to grow further across the world.” ANLP already has country ambassadors in India, the Middle East, Hong Kong and Turkey and during his travels, Robert will be able to meet with these local representatives and provide an avenue of communication back to the ANLP Head Office. Appointed at the end of 2007, Robert Smith sees his role as “being able to act as a bridge between the UK and the local offices, setting up local offices and visiting to share experience and knowledge” as well as “to create international standards and communications. With more local ambassadors appointed, there was a need for someone to join them up and spread the word internationally”. “ANLP is an organisation which is inclusive and not exclusive and in the spirit of what NLP generally is about” he notes, “especially given that there is quite a lot of fragmentation in the wider community”. NLP is an internationally accepted concept. When he is training different groups of people

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from different cultures “it is the same tale that I am telling, no matter what the background of the people is. NLP is a meta language and the process works wherever in the world I take it. You need to establish rapport within the culture in which you are working and that requires a change in who you are to accommodate that.” In teaching NLP he finds that he is constantly learning. Robert has been a trainer since he qualified as an MBA over 30 years ago and found his way into the computer world. His skills were

being able to act as a bridge between the UK and the local offices soon recognised and he moved into training people in interpersonal skills. “I just fell into it by accident”, he says. He soon found that people came to seek him out to ask advice and “rather than giving misleading or dangerous advice I decided that I had better learn some skills”. He learnt Transactional Analysis (TA) and first saw Eric Robbie at a TA

conference at Keele University. Robbie was then, in the early 80s, one of the first people giving NLP workshops in the UK. “I was blown away by NLP and found myself doing practitioner training with John Grinder soon afterwards. I gave my first NLP in Business training for IBM in 1984.” Robert remained a business trainer and also worked in performance enhancement working with Dave Marshall who was an INLPTA master trainer until he went to Hawaii to do a business practitioner and trainer training with Tad James and Wyatt Woodsmall. “After Wyatt and Tad went their separate ways, Wyatt invited me to join him and I began delivering trainer training in the Middle East and Turkey”. Many of his students started their own training companies and invited him back onto their trainings, “so I have worked with people from all of the Arab nations. I have

acquired a lot of crosscultural experience and straddle many boundaries internationally. Robert still does business training with his business partner Lesley Mackay. He spent two years working in the Caribbean and America with Cable & Wireless during telecoms deregulation, now five years ago. “I was involved in delivering leadership programmes and sales training all based around NLP”. Both he and Lesley are now mostly UK-based but still working cross-culturally. He is working with e-on, the German multinational, around cultural matters and with Belgian pharmaceutical company Solvay, running an International Training Managers meeting into which he has been bringing more NLP over the years. “These events have a worldwide attendance and I can now can truthfully say that I have trained people from 50 different nations” he says. Robert is keen to make contact with ANLP members who are based outside the UK and who have no local office, especially those who might be interested in becoming an ANLP country ambassador. You can contact him at robert-smith@freeuk. com or via ANLP.


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RESEARCH

Qualitative Studies Neuro Linguistic Programming A blueprint for success for Keepmoat

K

eepmoat operates within the extremely competitive housing market, refurbishing social housing and building social housing for rent and private housing for sale. It has a mission to be ‘a leading partner in community regeneration’. If Keepmoat wants to achieve this mission it needs to find a way to differentiate itself from its competitors. A study was conducted to identify if Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) could be successfully used by Keepmoat to create a competitive advantage. This was approached through a simple research project and two qualitative assessment processes. An initial piece of research was conducted, which involved using NLP language within letters accompanying questionnaires to assess employee satisfaction to identify the affect that the use of NLP language had on return rate. Secondary research included a review of the current literature available on the topic of NLP, using a variety of sources. Two further qualitative projects were undertaken that looked at NLP Practitioners’ experiences within the business and the perceived competitive advantage that this offered to Keepmoat. This was completed alongside an action based project that incorporated the use of NLP language within

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the quality standards of a tender submission to a Local Authority. The employee satisfaction questionnaire elicited a 38% response rate and significant sample size of 29% identifiable responses. The study demonstrated a return rate of 36% for letters that remained in the original format, 39% for letters that had used Linguistic Presuppositions tailored to facilitate an internal representation conducive to returning the questionnaire, and 25% for letters that were presented in the Format model. Although a limited study, it would suggest that where linguistic presuppositions are used, it is possible to increase response rate to questionnaires. The qualitative assessment of the perceived business benefits of NLP consisted of a series of 12 questions to elicit the subjective experience of each respondent through a self administered questionnaire. The responses demonstrated that all

respondents agreed that NLP had helped them to communicate better, improved their understanding of themselves and others and led them to understand how their minds work and how to use them to achieve better results. “Peoples’ skills and understanding are in short supply in this industry; Keepmoat are already better than most of their competitors. If Keepmoat can increase their skills and understanding (through NLP) they can create a major competitive advantage” (Ward, MD for Haslam Homes, Keepmoat 2007). The final qualitative study assessed the use of NLP language patterns within the quality standards of a housing investment bid with a local District Council. Tender submissions


RESEARCH

Although a limited study, it would suggest that where linguistic presuppositions are used, it is possible to increase response rate to questionnaires were evaluated on the basis of 40% cost and 60% quality (the main focus of the NLP language). Prior to the submission, Keepmoat had no relationship with the Council which they could use to influence the decision. It was therefore imperative

that the quality submission stood out from the rest; it needed to be different and to facilitate the Council to choose Keepmoat

as a partner to deliver their housing investment framework. Of the ten submissions received by the Council, Keepmoats scored highest. The tender was evaluated as 40% cost, 56.20% quality thus giving Keepmoat a final total of 96.20%. To get 56.2 out of 60 (94%) on quality, each of the 13 questions had to score between 9 and 10. To achieve this, according to the Council’s feedback, each response had to be “specifically related to the Council’s programme” (King, 2007). Following further assessments including office and site visits, contractor presentations and question and answer sessions, Keepmoat were chosen as one of the two framework contractors responsible for delivering the works for the Council. The value of these works to Keepmoat is £25 million. The main findings of this study highlights that NLP can be used by Keepmoat to differentiate itself from its competition and ultimately gain a competitive advantage, but this can only be achieved through support and commitment which transcends throughout the whole company. Further details of this study are available via Awaken Consulting, www.awakenconsulting. co.uk, or by calling Lisa Wake on 01642 714702. Sarah Banner is a Bid Coordinator within the procurement team at Keepmoat, and is currently studying for an MBA at Nottingham Trent University. Lisa Wake is a Master Trainer of NLP and business training and development consultant.

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TRAINING & WORKSHOPS

Passion in Action Creating effective social change with NLP by Eve Menezes Cunningham

D

o you ever get tired of hearing about how society is going downhill? How businesses are all out for themselves? How it’s all doom and gloom? According to the organisers of Passion in Action, “Record numbers of people in Britain are giving up their spare time to volunteer to help others and, acting locally, to build a more just and peaceful world. Businesses are seeking to integrate successful business practice with a concern for social, environmental and ethical issues.” The hosts of Passion in Action, Judith Lowe and Judy DeLozier, use their extensive experience to help people (whether they’re in business, the public sector or an individual) with social projects. They use NLP to teach people “people focused” and “values based” skills. Judith Lowe has used NLP in business and the public sector for twenty years. She is the Managing Director of PPD Learning Ltd. And her passion is using NLP to make a contribution to the world. Judy DeLozier was a member of John Grinder and Richard Bandler’s original group of students. Since 1975, she’s been training people around the globe using NLP. She has co-written several books with Grinder, Bandler and Robert Dilts. Her background in Congolese dance and ballet inspired her to use dance and

movement as an NLP tool. Using dance, she created, with Dilts, Somatic Syntax. She also developed the Dancing S.C.O.R.E. technique.

Using NLP to make a contribution to the world

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Rapport Publisher, Karen Moxom, loved the event. She remembers one of the participants asking Judith and Judy about

their desired outcome for the weekend. Judy said, “To support you all” and Karen was particularly taken by “Judy’s elegant response, enriched by an equally elegant arm movement, which I have managed to anchor over the last three days. Judith and Judy have given us, over the last three days so much more than ‘support’. As far as I’m concerned, they certainly met their outcome. They reminded us, on numerous occasions that we are ‘so much more than that’.” Enduring backache after a house move meant that Karen had been panicking at the prospect of sitting down for so long. She says “ I wasn’t sure I could ‘do’ sitting. To say I was completely mesmerised by Judy and Judith is an understatement. To be honest, I could have sat there for days listening to their words of wisdom, stories and Judy’s jokes. “What was so refreshing about this event was that the participants came from all walks of life and all corners of the world. Our commonality was our passion for wanting to make a difference and doing something positive for our ‘community’ … community being a very loose term. This ‘bigger picture’ commonality would carry us through the weekend and beyond. We soon realised that this was a beginning. A starting point where we had permission to


TRAINING & WORKSHOPS

Who sings your song? This is a Timeline exercise to help you identify all the support you’ve ever had and utilise it now. Walking your timeline (if you don’t have the physical space, use a piece of paper and a couple of fingers) and identify all the people in your life who have really supported you. The people who have sung your song and been there for you. Associate into each supportive moment. How does it make you feel? Bring that person forward along your timeline. Repeat this for every single person who’s ever supported you. Now you’ve gathered a whole team of sponsors from throughout your life. You can draw on this support in reaching your big, hairy audacious goal.

that her desire to make a difference was share our dreams and support each other. On delivered every topic with passion, assurance, reinforced. Ritva found the NLP tools a practical level, this was a great opportunity humour and seamless personal integration. helpful as they’ll allow her “to put my to share our skills and offer practical help Not once did they talk over each other and yet dreams into action, but in sync with my and advice to our colleagues, model success, they were able to finish each other’s sentences, empower each other stepping in and out of the and develop a team of frame, ensuring every important sponsors and allies.” message was really understood What’s your big, hairy, audacious goal? Early on in the by the captivated audience. I weekend, the outcome felt I was experiencing a ballet.” Karen says that they experienced a really empowering Robert Dilts, logical levels exercise. They did it in groups with each level personified by a participant. Each of “generative Karen also loved the diversity person had to state their “big, hairy, audacious goal”. Then ‘Environment’ asked the collaboration” was set of the participants. People person going through the exercise questions about how their environment could by pointing out that if who knew nothing about NLP both challenge them and support them. By looking at the way each logical level Judith gave Judy £1 mixed with people at all levels (environment, behaviour, capabilities, beliefs and values, identity and vision) would and Judy gave Judith up to Master Trainer. There impact on their goal, they were able to discover blocks (and support) and create solid £1, both would have were also community workers, action plans, too. £1. But by sharing an councillors and counsellors. idea each, both would They had travelled to Covent To work alone on this, state your own big goal. Say it aloud even though no one can walk away with two Garden from as far a field as hear you. Then work through each level, looking at the things that are supporting you ideas. Karen says this India, Poland, Italy, Sweden and limiting you and holding you back. approach “formed and Peckham! Karen says, Make notes and when you’ve worked through each level, turn your notes into an the basis of the whole “How empowering to discover action plan. Now you can move ahead knowing you’re congruent and able to achieve weekend.” that when needs and wants are your goal. Another Passion in listed, everyone in the room had Action participant, something to offer and everyone Ritva Karlstrom found else wanted it – that’s synergy! calling.” As a result of the event, Ritva it hard to limit her praise as so many things Connections were made over the weekend feels that she’ll be better able to trust her “are special about Passion in Action.” Ritva and practical, helpful, supportive links were heart “when it guides me to seize that says that magic was “created by all positive forged. Reservations and hesitations were opportunity to make a difference, no matter thoughts and good intentions.” She felt that removed and big hairy goals were verbalised how small or grand.” there was “a joint, sincere wish to support and and fixed into place as being possible.” When Karen looks back at the event, encourage each and everyone to move forward she’s “impressed by Judy and Judith’s in their own ways of wanting and trying to To book your place for September’s Passion in amazing presentation skills and their contribute and make this world a better place. Action, please visit www.ppdlearning.co.uk/ effortless teamwork.” She says they created “I came out with glowing inspiration, training/seminars/nlp-creating-social-change a “metaphorical dance as they elegantly increased curiosity and openness.” She felt

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DIARY

The Accelerated Coaching Skills For NLPers 12 Apr 2008 Chiswick - London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 david@performancepartnership. com

Diary of Events for Spring / Summer 2008 April 08 Practice Group - Business Communication 1 Apr 2008 London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Leading From The Soul: Engaging Authentic Leadership with Aboodi Shabi 1 Apr 2008 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com 12 day NLP Practitioner 3 Apr 2008 Chelmsford ESSEX Denise Collins 01245 267058 Denise.Collins100@virgin.net Advanced Master Practitioner 4 Apr 2008 Manchester Chris Morris 020 7107 9790 hello@chrismorris.com NLP Diploma Aberdeen 5 Apr 2008 Forres - Moray Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk NLP Leader - NLP Champion Certificate - for Therapists 5 Apr 2008 Essex Deborah Cole-Wilde 07974 330768 debbie@cole-wilde.co.uk

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Spring 2008 - rapport

NLP Practitioner 7-day intensive 12 Apr 2008 York Philip Callaghan 01904 636216 info@bronze-dragon.com

Introducing NLP 5 Apr 2008 London John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymourassociates.co.uk

Enneagram Relationships Workshop 12 Apr 2008 Roehampton- London Grahame C Morgan-Watson 01403 823283 info@metame.co.uk

7 day fast track NLP Practitioner 5 Apr 2008 Sandwich- Kent Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com

Create the Life You Want’ Free 3 Hour Workshop 12 Apr 2008 Sandwich - Kent Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com

Time Line Therapy Practitioner 6 Apr 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

INLPTA NLP Practitioner Training 13 Apr 2008 London Helen Drake 0208 995 2864 helen@pointtaken.com

Accelerated NLP Master Practitioner Certification 6 Apr 2008 London Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@infiniteexcellence.com

Free introduction to NLP 14 Apr 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk

NLP Sales Training 8 Apr 2008 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymourassociates.co.uk

NLP Master Practitioner Programme 14 Apr 2008 North Yorkshire Lisa Wake 01642 714 702 awakenconsulting@aol.com

Master practitioner 10 Apr 2008 Exeter Jane Stubberfield 01392 841153 jane@jsa-development.co.uk

INLPTA Diploma 15 Apr 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk

Trainer Training 2008 Part One 12 Apr 2008 Worcestershire Ralph Watson 01527 58531 ralph@dynamic-communication. com

Accelerated Bandler approved NLP Prac 18 Apr 2008 Leeds Nick Kemp 01274 622994 info@nickkemp.com

NLP Practitioner Course - 7 days 19 Apr 2008 Brighton Terry Elston 0800 074 6425 terryelston@nlpworld.co.uk NLP Coaching Excellence 25 Apr 2008 York Philip Callaghan 07968 223 947 info@resourcefulchange.co.uk NLP Diploma 25 Apr 2008 Chichester Roger Terry 01243 792122 roger@evolutiontraining.co.uk Certified [SNLP] NLP Practitioner Course 26 Apr 2008 Lewes- East Sussex Christina Mills 01273 626644 christinamills@isiscentre.co.uk Weight No More 26 Apr 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk Self-Hypnosis Made Easy 26 Apr 2008 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com Weekend NLP Practitioner 26 Apr 2008 Chelmsford - Essex Denise Collins 01245 476376 Denisecollins100@aol.com Fast-Track NLP Sports Practitioner (for existing NLP Practitioners) 28 Apr 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com Advanced Personal Development I 28 Apr 2008 North Yorkshire Susi Strang Wood MRCGP 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com

Essential NLP for Business Success 30 Apr 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

May 08 Hypnotherapy Workshop 3 May 2008 Glasgow Kirsty McKinnon 0141 248 3913 kirsty@excelr8.co.uk Accelerated NLP Practitioner Certification 3 May 2008 London Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@infiniteexcellence.com Practice Group - Leadership Development 6 May 2008 London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Discover NLP 7 May 2008 Covent Garden- Central London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Modelling Excellence - ANLPaccredited Master Practitioner Module I 9 May 2008 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com Create the Life You Want’ Free 3 Hour Workshop 10 May 2008 London Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com NLP Practitioner - Part 1 10 May 2008 Covent Garden- Central London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Advanced Influencing Skills 12 May 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com


DIARY

PhotoReading 12 May 2008 Croydon Michael Carroll 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk

NLP Diploma (INLPTA certified) 30 May 2008 New Forest Greg Laws 01794 399979 info@openmindtraining.co.uk

Certified NLP Practitioner for Business 13 May 2008 Reading Daryll Scott 0118 900 1527 swen@mynoggin.co.uk

June 08

Free introduction to NLP 15 May 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk Stone Age NLP Master Practitioner 17 May 2008 New Forest and Botswana Greg Laws 01794 399979 info@openmindtraining.co.uk

NLP Master Practitioner Certification 2 Jun 2008 Croydon Michael Carroll 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk More Assertive More Effective 3 Jun 2008 London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Advanced Coaching Skills: ANLP-accredited Master Practitioner module 2 5 Jun 2008 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com

Coaching with NLP Practitioner 6 Jun 2008 Exeter Jane Stubberfield 01392 841153 jane@jsa-development.co.uk Discover NLP 7 Jun 2008 London Helen Drake 0208 995 2864 helen@pointtaken.com Re-Vitalise Your Life 7 Jun 2008 Croydon Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com NLP Diploma 9 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

Free introduction to NLP 19 Jun 2008 Alvechurch- West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk NLP Diploma 26 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com NLP Sports Diploma 26 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com NLP Business Diploma 26 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

NLP Sports Diploma 9 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

Accelerated NLP Practitioner Certification 29 Jun 2008 London Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@infiniteexcellence.com

The Language of Our Bodies A New Linguistics for NLP 5 Jun 2008 Wiltshire Paul King 01380 859106 paul@thebeyondpartnership.co.uk

NLP Business Diploma 9 Jun 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

Advanced Practitioner 30 Jun 2008 North Yorkshire Susi Strang Wood MRCGP 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com

NLP Trainer Training 6 Jun 2008 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymourassociates.co.uk

12 Mistakes Consultants Make And How to Avoid Them 12 Jun 2008 Covent Garden- Central London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk

Roast Your Inner Pig! for Advanced Presenters 29 May 2008 London Toy Odiakosa 020 7348 8972 toy@ela-consulting.com

Enneagram_Three_Instincts (Subtypes) Workshop 6 Jun 2008 Roehampton- London Grahame Morgan-Watson & Russ Hudson 01403 823283 info@metame.co.uk

The NLP Master Practitioner Certification 13 Jun 2008 Chiswick London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 david@performancepartnership. com

Diploma In Clinical Supervision 30 May 2008 North East Susi Strang Wood MRCGP 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com

How to be a Master Coach: Coaching with NLP 6 Jun 2008 Covent Garden- Central London PPD Learning Ltd 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk

Create the Life You Want Free 3 Hour Workshop 14 Jun 2008 Sandwich - Kent Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com

Advanced Personal Development II 19 May 2008 North Yorkshire Susi Strang Wood MRCGP 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com Business Practitioner 20 May 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk Business Practitioner Course 22 May 2008 Forres - Highland Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk

July 08 Introducing NLP 5 Jul 2008 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymourassociates.co.uk Essential NLP for Business Success 7 Jul 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com

Transforming Self-Concept - ANLP-Accredited Master Practitioner module 3 11 Jul 2008 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com NLP Practitioner Training 13 Jul 2008 London Kirsty McKinnon 0141 248 3913 kirsty@excelr8.co.uk INLPTA Diploma 18 Jul 2008 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk Accelerated NLP Practitioner Certification 20 Jul 2008 Nottingham Colette White 0207 249 5051 colette@infiniteexcellence.com NLP Trainers Training and Evaluation 21 Jul 2008 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 info@thelazarus.com NLP Trainers Training 21 Jul 2008 London Lisa Wake 01642 714 702 awakenconsulting@aol.com Roast Your Inner Pig! for Advanced Presenters 24 Jul 2008 Bayswater - London Toy Odiakosa 020 7348 8972 toy@ela-consulting.com Free Introduction to NLP 26 Jul 2008 Alvechurch - West midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk

Stone Age NLP 9 Jul 2008 Botswana- Africa Greg Laws 01794 399979 info@openmindtraining.co.uk

To get your workshops and events listed in Rapport, log in as a member to www.anlp.org and enter your events into the online diary. Every issue, online events listed for the next 3 months will be included in Rapport. rapport - Spring 2008

| 41


Hypnotize Yourself Out of Pain Now! Second Edition A Powerful, User-Friendly Program for Anyone Searching for Immediate Pain Relief Bruce N. Eimer PhD ABPP

“Finally,�There's A Roadmap for Your�Journey�to NLP Mastery�at�the�Highest�Level”

… to tame pain, we must use our brain. The use of hypnosis as a tool for relieving pain is not experimental—it is tried, tested, and proven. This book focuses on your role in being your own healer. It will help you explore a wide range of self-hypnosis techniques, improving your ability to cope with and manage your pain and allowing you to live more comfortably. You will learn how to:

ISBN 978-184590087-8 £12.99

UÊÊÊ1ÃiÊÃi v Þ« à ÃÊÌ ÊÀi iÛiÊÞ ÕÀÊ«> UÊÊÊ/>«Ê Ì ÊÞ ÕÀÊ Ü Ê >ÌiÊ>L ÌÞÊÌ Ê control pain UÊÊÊ ÃiÊÌ iÊ iÌ `Ê vÊÃi v Þ« à ÃÊLiÃÌÊ suited to you UÊÊÊ ÌiÀÀÕ«ÌÊÞ ÕÀÊL `Þ½ÃÊV À VÊ«> Ê «Ê UÊÊÊ1ÃiÊ>ÊÛ>À iÌÞÊ vÊ« ÜiÀvÕ ÊÌ ÃÊÌ ÊÀi`ÕViÊ or eliminate your pain

7 i ÊÞ Õ½ÛiÊ >`Ê«> ÊÌ >ÌÊ >à ½ÌÊ Àië `i`ÊÌ ÊÌÀi>Ì i ÌÊv ÀÊ>Ê }ÊÌ i]Ê Ì½ÃÊ >ÌÕÀ> ÊÌ ÊLiV iÊ` à Õà i`Ê> `Ê expect nothing to work. This book provides a fresh look at the problem of managing persistent, physical pain using the tool of self-hypnosis, and this new approach comes from an experienced hypnosis clinician and clinical psychologist who is a pain sufferer himself.

INCLUDES A FREE AUDIO CD Designed to expand and improve your ability to control and cope with pain. Bruce N. Eimer, PhD, ABPP, is a clinical psychologist with over twenty Þi>À½ÃÊiÝ«iÀ i ViÊÌÀi>Ì }Ê«i « iÊÜ Ì ÊV À VÊ«> ÊÕà }ÊV } Ì Ûi behavioral and hypnosis strategies. He is a certified by the American Society vÊ V> Ê Þ« à ÃÊ>ÃÊ> Ê ««À Ûi`Ê ÃÕ Ì> ÌÊ Ê V> Ê Þ« à ð

Boundaries in Human Relationships How to be Separate and Connected Anné Linden The most important distinction anyone can ever make in their life is between who they are as an individual and their connection Ü Ì Ê Ì iÀÃ°Ê > ÊÞ ÕÊÌÀÕ ÞÊ ÛiÊ> Ì iÀÊ> `Ê be the whole, complete and unique person you are? How do you know the difference LiÌÜii ÊÞ ÕÀÊvi>ÀÊ> `ÊÞ ÕÀÊ«>ÀÌ iÀ½Ã¾Ê ÀÊ between your past anger and your here-andnow anger? The answer lies with boundaries – and this is a practical guide to unlocking these mysteries. The book teaches you exactly what boundaries are, how to recognise when you need them and how to create and maintain them using three simple skills: UÊÊÊ>ÊV i>À ÞÊ`iw i`ÊÃÌÀÕVÌÕÀiÊ vÊL Õ `>À iÃ

ISBN 978-184590076-2 £18.99

UÊÊÊëiV wVÊ«À>VÌ V> ÊÃÌi«ÃÊv ÀÊVÀi>Ì }Ê> `Ê managing boundaries - with examples and exercises UÊÊÊ Ê`i«Ì ÊiÝ« À>Ì Ê vÊÌ iÊà } wV> ÌÊ areas of relationships and self-esteem through the lens of boundaries.

After 18 years as a professional actor Anné Linden went back to college and trained to be a psychotherapist. Anné founded the New York Training ÃÌ ÌÕÌiÊv ÀÊ *Ê> `ÊÌ iÊ *Ê i ÌiÀÊv ÀÊ*ÃÞV Ì iÀ>«ÞÊqÊÌ iÊwÀÃÌÊ vÊÌ i ÀÊ kind in the world. Anné introduced NLP to Europe, providing the first NLP Practitioner Training in the Netherlands in 1982 and certifying the first European Trainers in 1985. She continues to train and teach in France, Belgium and the Netherlands. For more information visit www.annelinden.com

visit www.anglo-american.co.uk or contact us on 01202 724296

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BOOK REVIEWS

rapport book review BusinessWise Edited by Andy Coote & Mindy Gibbins-Klein £9.99, Ecademy Press new business. The range of authors results in a variety of styles which consequently varies the pace from chapter to chapter. Each area is explored with sufficient care and the overall read is well structured. While much of the material may be familiar to the more experienced reader, it is still useful to have such a wealth of experience distilled into a single informative volume. I would highly recommend BusinessWise to anyone who is considering a business venture, as there is something of interest for everyone, especially those new to the entrepreneurial urge. Philip Callaghan, Book Review Panel

When I received this book to review, it left me wishing that it had been available when I was starting out. Drawing on the shared experience of its many contributing authors, BusinessWise offers an informed overview of the many aspects of modern business. Ideas, concepts and practical advice are provided, creating plenty of food for thought without too much detail. References are also included for those who wish to explore further. Covering everything from business planning to beating procrastination and marketing to management, BusinessWise covers a lot of ground and makes sense of the bewildering array of expertise required to start up your own

Decision Making & Problem Solving Strategies John Adair £8.99, Kogan Page First published in 1997, these ideas are no longer new, but they are tried and tested and clearly presented. John Adair was the world’s first professor of leadership studies and is possibly the most prolific author on leadership, decision making, creativity and management. John Adair is also the man responsible for the term ‘think outside of the box’, which he coined in 1969, from his brain teaser: how to join a square of 9 dots with 4 consecutive straight lines. Although I have become tired of this phrase, I am glad to see that the author keeps the term ‘brainstorming’, which was out

of favour for a while, but I think describes the resulting ‘storm’ of creativity very well. The book is a quick read, and packed with clear diagrams, models and exercises to illustrate Adair’s theories and put them straight into effective action. What we have here, therefore, is an excellent guide for students new to the subject and a good reference manual and refresher. Adair distinguishes between decision making, problem solving and creative thinking, and gives the reader a step-by-step guide to engage successfully in these activities. Susanna Bellini, Book Review Panel

Coaching for High Performance David Norman £17.99, M&B Publishing Matt and Buzz is a great concept and makes the book – ‘Coaching for High Performance’ very readable. The reason why a Bear and a Mouse hold my attention is something that I struggle to put my finger on! I guess all that’s important is that they do and obviously that’s a good thing. This book, as far as I could tell, took a while to get onto (or into!) the all important area that is ‘values’. When it was eventually covered in part three, page 74, it was covered in a way that excited me and gave some new food for thought. It is a fairly quick read, a positive but also a negative. It

felt like a whistle stop tour; at times like a runway train. I think this was the author’s intention though. In his introduction, David Norman talks about being able to read the book in only two hours, and that business people often ask for the thinnest book on the topic. In which case I think his mission has been well accomplished. “Matt Guidelines” are a fantastic recap on the main steps to follow for any given topic. It is one of the additions that continue to embody the author’s idea of making the book easy to digest. David Rawlings, Book Review Panel

p

NLP Inside

Matt & Buzz¥ on:

Business Series

C O A C H I N G f or HI G H PER F O R M A N C E Boost Your Career With Amazing New Skills

Sensational ne xt generation tools and techniques for high impact res ults, rapid effective change and lasting succ ess

David Norman

How to take you

r coaching capabi

lities to a new leve

l

rapport - Spring 2008

| 43


AUTHOR INTERVIEW

NLP AND PROSPERITY STEVE NOBEL INTERVIEW Forget status. Forget other people. What do you think about your journey yourself? interview by Eve Menezes Cunningham

S

teve Nobel, author of The Prosperity Game [Findhorn Press, 2006] and a Director at Alternatives, blends spirituality (he trained in Shamanism and other spiritual traditions) with a background in finance to live a rich life. He says, “I think money is a game, played across the world. It’s an inner and outer game and involves mastering anxiety, fears and concerns about money as well as gaining trust that money will be there. It’s not good to be naïve about money. There are principles about money and receiving. The more you give, the more you get. In spiritual terms, when you’re emitting a high vibration – or, in NLP terms, when you’re in a good state – you attract more money. You need to have a clear vision and know where you’re heading. Resistance is a natural part of the journey. Everyone has doubt, anxiety, no confidence and other unique ways of blocking ourselves. Money’s never the real issue, it’s never the goal.” Steve says he sees money as a game “When I remember to”. During the years he’s spent as a Director of Alternatives at St James, Piccadilly, Steve has heard many speakers talk about NLP. He says, “I saw Michael Breen at Alternatives when he did a talk with Paul McKenna in the late 90s. I started to read about NLP and got more interested. And through a series of coincidences, was reintroduced to Michael. “I’d done a bit of cosmic ordering, I suppose, thinking ‘wouldn’t it be nice to do some NLP training that didn’t cost thousands of pounds.’ And then Michael asked, ‘Would you like to do one of these courses for free?’ So in 2005, I did the Practitioner course. I was absolutely blown away.” Steve liked the business focus of the course. When he completed it, Michael told him that there was a vacancy for him in his organisation. Steve says, “I did more training there, high performance business coaching training and

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I did my Master Practitioner course. Having been in the general personal development field, I was a great believer in synchronicity.” Earlier on, Steve hadn’t been so happy about his work. He says, “My background included ten years in international banking in the city from the mid 70s to mid 80s. This ranged from complete boredom to strong stress. I felt lost and my heart wasn’t in it. I was working with lots of money. Millions were going through every day. It was a time of financing of the arms industry with arms going out to Iran and lots of Third World loans. There seemed to be a lot of projects planned for Africa and I didn’t know whether they needed all these dams and railways or if these loans were a way for people here to get rich.” He left after ten years to work in local government. The work culture he was in had changed from “very right wing to very left wing.” During his ten years there, Steve was working with people rather than directly with money “but money issues were very strong. Now I’ve been at Alternatives for ten years, I feel I have a good whole view of money. But I’ve struggled with the issue of money. I thought that because it was such a big challenge, I’d understand it more if I wrote about it. So The Prosperity Game was written primarily for me but it’s fantastic that other people are reading it. And it was a rich experience writing it. “Prosperity is a verb, it’s what we’re thinking and doing, not what we’re owning. It’s not about status. There’s an obsession with job titles. I had a coaching client recently who was really stressed in his job. He was so obsessed with the status of going up the ladder, he was stuck. He kept thinking ‘If I get to a certain level in a company, I’ll be happy and confident’ but in the meantime, he’s sacrificing happiness, health and vitality for a bit of status. We come from a class system in the UK

so people are very concerned with where they are in the pecking order. All this takes away from the whole joy of earning money when you’re in alignment.” So how can people get into alignment? Steve suggests asking yourself: What makes you happy? What are you good at? What do you really value? He says, “Forget status. Forget other people. What do you think about your journey yourself ? Living for your parents, friends or peers is living from a disempowering position. There’s a deeper intelligence at work that we can all connect to. When it comes to work and money, sometimes, we don’t see the bigger picture. If we connect – go into nature, meditate or do something creative – we can do much more. I trust that part of myself much more, now.” Steve says, “There’s a spiritual dimension to money and work. Traditionally spirituality was very different. People think of retreating to a monastery but now workers connect with their intuition more. There’s even a US marketing book called Liberating the Corporate Soul. Coaching helps people get in touch with a deeper part of themselves. They know the way forward. “I’m very interested in helping people access the full range of their resources. Balancing the left brain’s planning and thinking with the right brain’s ability to be inspired. There’s a deeper unconscious where our values are and a spiritual realm. I’m very interested in aligning all three. It’s like having a train with three carriages. If one is derailed, the whole train can’t proceed very fast. NLP is great for the conscious mind and hypnosis and language help connect with the subconscious but spiritual tools help you go deeper.”


AUTHOR INTERVIEW

There’s a deeper intelligence at work that we can all connect to. When it comes to work and money, sometimes, we don’t see the bigger picture

What will more money mean for you? Ask a friend “What do you want?” She or he might answer “Lots of money” so ask, “Why?” repeatedly and listen to each answer (for example, “so I can buy my own home”, “so I can feel more free”, “for security” and so on) until you both know that you’ve got to her or his core reason. Swap over and you answer your friend to get to your true reasons behind wanting wealth. Knowing what’s really motivating you will help you manifest more money.

Do you resist giving or receiving? Another exercise we did at one of Steve’s Prosperity Consciousness workshops was to bring an amount of money we’d feel comfortable about losing in pound coins. We then had to walk around the crowded room offering or accepting offered coins from other participants in silence. When I offered strangers money and they didn’t accept, I felt sad. And the handful of coins, when overflowing, definitely attracted more money (as a result of my more generous spirit in those moments?) than when I was down to one or no coins and probably emitting desperation vibes. What kind of energy does money have in your life? Do you sign cheques with a firm “only” or a more appreciative “thank you”? Start noticing your interactions with money – each time you reach for your credit card or cash or even when you just think about money.

Resources Sign up for Steve’s Daily Prosperity Thoughts and find out more about Steve at www.stevenobel.com Steve is running a retreat in Spain this April. Visit www.alchemyofwork.com For more information about events and workshops at Alternatives, visit www.alternatives.org.uk Find out more about Michael Breen’s training courses at www.mbnlp.com

rapport - Spring 2008

| 45


PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT

The Reframe Game and How to Win It by Mindy Gibbins-Klein

A

s NLP practitioners, we understand the importance of reframing things in a positive way. But how often to we get a chance to really test this in our own lives? I saw a brilliant example of reframing last week that really made me think. I was staying at a hotel in Colorado and I saw a pile of new books on a coffee table. Naturally, I had to take a look, in a strictly professional capacity, of course. There was a little note near the books which said ‘Book by local author. Please take one – free of charge.’ I thought, ‘How generous!’ Then the plot thickened. I noticed another pile of the same book in a different room in the hotel, and behind the note there was an even bigger pile of books. I wondered how the local author could afford to give so many books away – there were literally hundreds of books there, with copies being taken every day by hotel guests. Finally I saw a different note near the second pile which explained that these were ‘first edition’ copies and there were some minor typographical errors in them, which were being rectified in a second edition. The note invited me to look up and buy the second edition on Amazon if

I wanted! It also mentioned that the author would appreciate introductions to agents and traditional publishers. I have heard so many people complain about typos in books and yet here was an enterprising self-published author who turned a negative situation completely to her advantage. She realised that the book was not going to end up in bookstores with errors in it, so she decided to give away the 1000 or 2000 copies she’d had printed to people who would read it, possibly review it on Amazon and if they liked it, maybe they would buy more copies of the new version for friends. I just checked and she has many 5-star reviews of the book, probably written by people who appreciated a free book and a good read. If you want to know more about the book and this ingenious campaign, just drop me a line. Now think about the last time things didn’t go according to plan for you. Perhaps a client cancelled or you didn’t get the result you wanted during a session or a workshop. Maybe you planned to accomplish a lot more than you have in the first quarter of this year. How did you react? Did you get upset and angry? Did you complain or blame? Even skilled and experienced

Even skilled and experienced practitioners can forget that things have a way of presenting themselves the way the universe wants, and not according to our master plan

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practitioners can forget that things have a way of presenting themselves the way the universe wants, and not according to our master plan. If we could model ourselves on that author who turned her mishap into an opportunity, we could reframe the negative situation and make it work for us. What’s great about the fact that you are not working with that particular client? Why is it a blessing? And what other opportunities will open up for you now? I actually set out to accomplish two things in this article: to make you aware of a very clever book marketing strategy and to encourage you to remember what you already know about reframing situations. There are literally hundreds of ways to market yourself, your books, your events and your coaching services. Some of the ideas that we try don’t work out the way we want. I’d love to see us really practice what we preach and be role models, quickly transforming the less-than-ideal occurrences in life into something amazing.


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Tranceformations

Time for a Change

Personal & Business Excellence

NLP Practitioner

Claire Louise Hegarty

Performance Coach & Breakthrough Therapist

Tel: 0151 678 3358 Tel: 01244 390 411 Mob: 07714 853 524

NLP Psychotherapist

Email: info@tranceformations-pbe.com Website: www.tranceformations-pbe.com

Do you have problem relationships Suffer with ill health Wish you could stop smoking, lose weight or remove a phobia Have difficulty succeeding or achieving Often wish you could have a new life or totally change your own For support, assistance, motivation and coaching in any of these areas plus many more. Contact us now for a FREE CONSULTATION.

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• One of a select few teaching real Ericksonian hypnotherapy 0870 060 1549 www.nlpscotland.com


REGIONAL GROUPS

rapport networking contact Practice Group of the month

Pioneer your NLP skills with the newest Practice Group in town

T

he newest NLP practice group to Nottingham is re-launched with “Spring” in its step. Originally formed in 2006, Certified NLP Trainer, Tim Morrell has decided to give the group, as well as his coaching business Pioneering Futures (formally FocusHigher), a refreshing revamp for 2008. Tim is passionate about enabling all people to appreciate the benefits of using NLP in everyday life. After listening to feedback from participants, the practice sessions are now delivered to include a range of practical mind tools to help tackle those real day-to-day challenges in work, life and relationships. The scope of the group offers a fresh, fun and exciting approach, utilising expertise and experiences from the outdoors to create an environment for exploring possibilities, experimenting and inspiring a deeper sense of self awareness as a result. The practice group is open to anyone already practiced in NLP and also to those curious in

Tim Morrel of the Nottingham NLP Practice Group

wanting to learn more. The group meets at a new time of 6:30pm – 9pm on the last Thursday of each month, with doors opening at 6pm for a welcome chat. If you are new to NLP and want to come with a friend or colleague, that’s great... we offer a price reduction when you bring along a guest! Also new for 2008 is the launch of our ‘Think it, Believe it, Achieve It’ seminars, aimed at anyone, who wants to learn powerful techniques for reclaiming personal confidence, concentration and focus whilst creating compelling, achievable goals. For further details, visit www. pioneeringfutures.co.uk or to be added to the mailing list, e-mail your contact details to info@nottm-nlp-practice-group.co.uk If you are an NLP Trainer and interested in speaking as an expert in your field at our practice group, please send details to the e-mail address above.

England - North

Manchester NLP Group

Chiswick

London - Central

Harrogate Achievers Club

Tel: 08707 570292

Tel: 0208 992 9523

Tel: 0870 7744 321

Gary Plunkett

Sonia Marie Saxton

Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nwnlpgroups@aol.com

Email: smesaxton@saxtonpartners. co.uk

Newcastle Upon Tyne

Harrogate Practice Group

Tel: 0191 456 3930 Mob: 0777 228 1035

Tel: 0845 257 0036

Elizabeth Pritchard

Tel: 01326 212 959

Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com

Lancaster Practice Group

Philip Brown

Email: Jonathan@performancepartnership.com www.performancepartnership.com

Tel: 020 8686 9952

Tel: 07970 639552 Mob: 07970 639552

Tel: 01642 714702

Hants - NLP South

Dave Allaway

Email: dave@depthfour.com www.depthfour.com

North West & North Wales (Chester)

Lancs - Nr Clitheroe

Tel: 08707 570 292

Nigel Heath

Tel: 01794 390 651

Email: heatherapy@aol.com www.nlp-south.org.uk

Gary Plunkett

Hertfordshire - Letchwoth

Dawn Haworth

Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nlp4fun@aol.com

Email: admin@nlpand.co.uk www.nlpand.co.uk

York

Tel: 01462 674411 Email: james@resource-ecologies. co.uk

Tel: 01254 824 504

Leeds - West Yorkshire Liz Tolchard

Tel: 01943 873 895 Mob: 07909 911 769

Email: liztolchard@hotmail.com

Manchester Business NLP and Emotional Intelligence Group Andy Smith

Tel: 0845 83 855 83

Email: andy@practicaleq.com www.manchesternlp.co.uk

48 |

Spring 2008 - rapport

Susanna Bellini & Philip Callaghan

Tel: 01904 636 216 Email: info@bronze-dragon.com www.bronze-dragon.com/nlp_group. shtml

England - South Bedfordshire

Melody and Joe Cheal Tel: 01767 640956

Email: info@gwiztrainig.com www.gwiztraining.com

Email: info@ppdlearning.co.uk www.ppdlearning.co.uk/community/ourpractice-group

London - Central

Michael Carroll

North Yorkshire Lisa & Mark Wake

Judy Delaforce

Croydon

Email: info@realnlp.co.uk www.nlpacademy.co.uk

Email: Awakenconsulting@aol.com www.awakenconsulting.co.uk

Tel: 01524 847 070

Jonathan Bowder

James Rolph

Adrian Hope-Lewis

www.nlpgroup.freeserve.co.uk

London - Central (Business) Mark Underwood

Tel: 020 7249 7472

London - Central/North

Practitioners and above only Jeremy Lazarus Tel: 020 8349 2929

Email: Jeremy@thelazarus.com www.thelazarus.com

Kent & East Sussex NLP Group

London East - Stratford, E15

Tel: 01892 511231

Tel: 020 8597 9200

Beverley Hamilton

Email: beverley.hamilton@uwclub.net

London - Hampstead Najma Zaman

Tel: 020 8926 1297 mob: 07950477318

Email: firstpath@btinternet.com

Sharon Eden

Email: sharon.eden@womenofcourage. co.uk

London NLP & Hypnosis Practice Group Phillip Holt

Tel: 08451 306213 Mob: 07061 003 003

Email: enquiries@nlp-london.com www.nlp-london.com


REGIONAL GROUPS

London NW - SeeHearFeel NLP

Colchester NLP Group

Dorset

Edinburgh NLP Practice Group

Tel: 020 8958 5345 http://www.SeeHearFeelNLP.co.uk/

Tel: 01473 326980 Mob: 07710 781782 / 07710 781782

Tel: 01202 42 42 50

Tel: 07765244030/ 0131 664 4344

Rob

London West - Richmond NLP Group Henrietta Laitt

Tel: 0208 874 8203 Mob: 07880 614 040

Julian Campbell

Email: nlp@lifechangingtherapies.co.uk www.lifechangingtherapies.co.uk/ colnlp.html

Essex - Southend Pauline Oliver

Email: henrietta@richmondnlpgroup. org.uk www.richmondnlpgroup.org.uk

Tel: 01702 203465

North London NLP

Tel: 01603 211 961

Tom MacKay

Tel: 07815 879 055

Norfolk NLP Practice Group Stephen Ferrey

Email: info@motivational-coaching.co.uk www.motivational-coaching.co.uk

Email: tom@mackaysolutions.co.uk www.northlondonnlp.co.uk

Ipswich

Oxford

Tel: 07889 751578

Jan Freeston

Tel: 01865 516 136

Email: Janinefreeston@aol.com

South East London & City Simon Hedley

Tel: 07930 275 223

Email: londonpractice@psithinking. co.uk www.psithinking.co.uk/londonnlp practicegroup.htm www.nlpswap.com/

Sussex - Brighton Association of NLP Practitioners Terry Elston

Tel: 0800 074 6425

Email: enquiries@nlpworld.co.uk www.nlpworld.co.uk www.nlp-brighton-assoc.org

Steve Marsden

Email: steve_marsden@btopenworld. com

Redbridge - Ilford Sharon Ellis

Tel: 020 8098 0820

Email: glenda.yearwood@redbridge. gov.uk www.redbridge.gov.uk

John Chisholm or Brian Morton

Email: john@creative-leadership.co.uk bmhrd@btinternet.com www.nlpdorset.co.uk

Email: wheatley.co@btconnect.com sheena@changingperceptions.org.uk www.changingperceptions.org.uk

Swindon, West Country

Forres/Elgin NLP Practice Group (North of Scotland)

Tony Nutley

01793 554834

Email: info@ukcpd.net www.ukcpd.net

Worcestershire and Gloucestershire Practice Group Kim Phillips

Tel: 01386 861916

Email: kimmphillips@hotmail.com

England - Midlands The Derby NLP Practice Group Karl Walkinshaw

Tel: 07971 654 440

Email: karl@k-d-w.co.uk

East Midlands NLP Group William Wood

England - West

Tel: 01332 347141 x2556/ 01332 669364

BATH NLP North East Somerset

Midlands - Birmingham

Tel: 01225 404 050

Tel: 0121 625 7193 Mob: 07740 075669

Philippe Roy

Mandy Ward

Email: pr@in-focus.org www.bathnlp.co.uk

Email: mandy.ward3@virgin.net

Bath NLP Skills Builder

Northants - Northampton

Tel: 01823 334 080

Tel: 01604 812800

Ben Reeve

Ron Sheffield

Sussex - Brighton

Email: benjamino_32@hotmail.com www.idevelop.co.uk

Email: ronald.sheffield@virgin.net www.nlpgroups.org

Tel:01903 821 172 Mob: 07903 564 760 Email: katie@sussex.co.uk www.sussex.co.uk/nlp

Bristol

Nottingham

Tel: 01179 423 310

Tel: 07810 484 215

Katie Bickerdike

Sussex - Chichester Roger and Emily Terry Tel: 01243 792 122 Mob: 07810 876 210

David Griffiths

Timothy Morrell

Email: david@metamorphosis.me.uk

Email: tim@focushigher.co.uk www.focushigher.co.uk

Cornwall Practice Group Elizabeth Pritchard

Tel: 01326 212 959

Email: info@evolutiontraining.co.uk www.evolutiontraining.co.uk

Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com

Sussex - Worthing

Email: jim@espconsultancy.co.uk

Devon - South-West (totnes) NLP Support Group

West Sussex - Chichester

Tel: 01803 866706/01803 323885

Andrew T. Austin

Email: andrew@23nlpeople.com www.nlpstudygroup.com

England - East Cambridgeshire Phil Jones

Tel: 07711 711 123

Email: phil@excitant.co.uk www.cambsnlp.co.uk

Alice Llewellyn & Anna Scott-Heyward

Devon - Torquay Chris Williams

Tel: 0781 354 9073

Devon & Cornwall NLP Practice Group Nick Evans

Patrick Wheatley & Sheena Wheatley

Rosie O’ Hara

Tel: 01309 676004

Email: nlphighland@onyxnet.co.uk www.nlphighland.co.uk

Glasgow

Mina McGuigan

Tel: 01236 610 949 Mob: 07916 275 605

Email: mina@nlpacademyscotland.co.uk www.nlpacademyscotland.co.uk

Glasgow Centre of Excellence Practice Group Michael Spence

Tel: 01316 647 854 Mob: 07710 332 841

Email: msnlp@btconnect.com

Glasgow - NLP in Education Jeff Goodwin

Tel: 0870 060 1549/0141 248 6484 Email: jeff@nlpscotland.com www.nlpscotland.com

Wales Shropshire & Mid Wales Practice Group Nick Greer

Tel: 01743 361133

Email: nlpgroup@nickgreer.com

www.nickgreer.com

West Midlands Worcestershire Sharon Rooke & David Smallwood

Tel:01905 352 882

Email: sharon@SCRassociates.com info@centralnlp.co.uk www.SCRassociates.com

Scotland Edinburgh Centre of Excellence Practice Group Michael Spence

Tel: 0131 664 7854

Email: msnlp@btconnect.com

Tel: 01752 245 570 Mob: 07832 357 208

Email: nick@nlp-southwest.co.uk www.nlp-southwest.co.uk

Practice Groups meet regularly and give you the chance to share experiences with like minded individuals and fellow professionals. They also offer you the opportunity to further your knowledge and add to your Continual Professional Development (CPD) through informed lectures and workshops. For further information on the Practice Groups listed, please log on to our website, www.anlp.org If you would like to add your Practice Group to this list or change existing details, please contact Karen on 0845 053 1162 or email admin@anlp.org

rapport - Spring 2008

| 49


ENDNOTE

Practice makes perfect! Group practice makes perfect fun!

Nigel Heath

H

ave you spent several thousand pounds learning NLP? Just like me! Have you found NLP life changing? I certainly have. At first I wanted to use these new understandings to change everyone I met to my view of the world! To ‘help’ them discover this new truth. Then I realised the greatest thing about NLP was discovering more about myself. The ‘programmes’ I run, and where my ‘default’ position is. Learning to flex from this point and recognising my strengths. Selfmodeling me, and modeling other people to enhance my own way of being better at anything I choose. NLP makes me a better Father, a better Husband, a better Reflexologist. I know I can make changes to ‘old’ and outdated behaviours anytime I want. NLP

gives me freedom and responseability. Having spent lots of money on Practitioner and Master Practitioner I continued to invest to maintain my interest, maintain my skills and grow

knowledge? 100%? More than 100%? 50%? 10%? Nothing? Is your NLP “A box or toolkit of techniques” which sits on the shelf, waiting for you to take it down now and again, dust it off, and put it back on the shelf ? Or have you embraced the spirit of NLP? As Richard Bandler succinctly puts it do you have “A wanton sense of curiosity”? Is it in your blood, in your body, in your soul? Go to your local NLP practice group and hone your skills, meet other NLPers, have fun keeping up with the changing world of NLP. Maybe there isn’t one handy on a night you can make. Life gets in the way, you’re shy or a little rusty with your NLP. If you live anywhere near Eastleigh, Hampshire, come along to NLP-South, ‘Probably the friendliest practice group in the world!’ We meet once a month on the first Thursday and

Go to your local NLP practice group and hone your skills, meet other NLPers, have fun keeping up with the changing world of NLP

50 |

Spring 2008 - rapport

my understanding. In some cases through further courses in personal development. Mostly through regular attendance at my local NLP practice group. Have you continued to learn and grow? What percentage of your original investment, do you spend every year on maintaining and furthering your understanding, skill and

welcome NLPers of all levels, even complete beginners. If you don’t live near enough, join our online ‘virtual’ group. Then you too can receive my full detailed report on each meeting in the NLP-South monthly newsletter; Plus: a ‘Home Practice Pack’, full of NLP type exercises for you to play with at home. Plus: a special CD interview with the guest speaker at NLP-South. All this can be yours when you become an online member of NLP-South. Mouse on over to www.nlpsouth.org.uk/anlp now & find out about the trial offer for Rapport readers. Would you like to start your own local group but don’t know where to begin? Online membership will give you material to use straight away in any size group of NLPers. If you need more help or ideas to get started email me. help@nlp-south.org.uk Keep practising!


Ever wondered what would happen if every young person in the UK was trained in NLP? What social issues could be a thing of the past? Obesity, depression, debt, bullying, stabbings, binge drinking, teen pregnancy, gang culture? Could ordinary young people with low aspirations be challenged to do extraordinary things? If there was a charity on a mission to bring about these changes, would you want to be part of the adventure? We hope so; because there’s some exciting work to be done. Kikass has built an enviable reputation as one of the UK’s most innovative and engaging youth charities. Over the past seven years we’ve noticed that so many of the issues mentioned above have their roots deep inside the core of a young person – their confidence, their self-esteem, their self efficacy and of course their beliefs. Increasingly we’ve grown tired of sticking plasters over the symptoms and are now on a mission to bring about deep level transformation. Already to this end we’re offering free 20 day NLP Practitioner trainings to young people and building an army of NLP coaches. We’ve also been experimenting with Fire Walking, Arrows and Board Breaking with exciting results. But it shouldn’t stop there. We’re continuing to scour the world for the best tools, techniques and amazing people who can help us in this mission. If you like what we’re up to and want to hear more, or maybe think you can add value to our adventure then please get in touch. To stimulate your thinking, but please don’t let it limit you, here are few areas in which you may be able to help: Trainers, Content Development Champions, Fundraising and Professional Services, Assistants/Mentors & Coaching Support, Admin Services, Advisors and Patrons. “The Kikass NLP program has changed my life in a powerful way, and I love being able to create this change for other people too” F.S Oxford

Want to Kikass? Then join us. However you think you can help, please drop us a line - Email Claire on nlp@kikass.tv or phone us on 020 7251 1693 Check out www.kikass.tv for more information.

Charity No. 1080886


“ISN’T IT TIME YOU STARTED TO MAKE SOME REAL MONEY FROM YOUR SKILLS AND KNOWLEDGE? LET ME SHOW YOU HOW.”

“The information I know about selling workshops, training and seminars is so valuable I am bound by a legal contract NOT to reveal my secrets to anyone. In fact, even writing this could attract unwanted attention, which is why I’m not going to reveal my name until I know I can trust you.”

Mr X

So, who is Mr X? Mr X is a semi-retired multi-millionaire who sold his training company for millions. He has signed a 78-page contract forbidding him from teaching the secrets behind his hugely successful seminar business. Now, due to a loop-hole found by his lawyers, he is training a select number of people at closed-door, secret location events to become wildly wealthy from running seminars, training courses and workshops. Every delegate HAS to sign a confidentiality agreement, declaring that they will not teach the business-building techniques revealed to others. Maybe only half a dozen readers of this publication qualify to attend… If you qualify, you will be able to create a training business that can run itself while achieving incredible profit margins of up to 50%, bottom-line profits in the millions and eventually an asset you can sell for a small fortune. You will never have to work again. Mr X has achieved all this and if he feels that you can learn from him, he will accept you onto one of his prestigious Bootcamp trainings. To qualify, you MUST fulfil three criteria... • You must already run workshops, training courses or seminars or plan to do so in the near future. In other words, you must already have a business that is up and running or will be within the next three months. • You must be willing to learn and take massive action on what you learn. Mr X will hold you accountable and track your progress. • You have to be willing to commit to a weekend in London where the intensive Bootcamp training will take place. You must turn off your mobile phone for two days and completely focus your attention. And the final criteria – you are frustrated by a lack of success or you are hungry for more success. Perhaps… • You find that advertising doesn’t seem to work, even when the ad sales person says it works for everyone else. You feel you are wasting money on marketing. • You are always in a last minute panic before trainings, desperately trying to sell the last few places – even the clichéd ‘early-bird discount doesn’t work. • You have tried lowering the prices to your events (because people tell you that you are too expensive), but even that doesn’t get more people through the door. • You find that even though your delegates have a great time and say that you run fantastic courses, you just aren’t making the amount of money you should be from running them. • You know you are a good trainer – maybe even an exceptional training, but your bank account certainly doesn’t say that.

• You struggle to sell corporate training and the competition seems to be getting tougher. • You see other companies or individuals doing better than you. Mr X has solutions for all these problems, including techniques to solve: • All your pricing problems. • All your cash flow and profitability problems. • All your marketing problems. • All your sales problems. He is a gold-mine of knowledge, experience and contacts and if he selects you to attend one of his exclusive trainings your business will never look the same again – and that’s guaranteed. In fact, he guarantees that his techniques work to the extent that if they don’t his advice won’t cost you a penny. Everything he does is backed by a no-quibble guarantee. Mr X started with nothing and is now worth millions (his accountants will provide you with indisputable proof of this). ALL his money was earned through running training courses, workshops and seminars. His techniques are not ‘pie in the sky’ from someone who has never done it. They are tried and tested and proven to work. Mr X has: • Created sales letters that have sold training all types of training worth millions of pounds a year with some courses costing £10,000 per person (and sold hundreds and hundreds of them!) • Generated £250,000 of revenue in one weekend in August (from people who initially said ‘No, I don’t want to come’) • Designed promotions to ‘dead’ enquiries that netted £70,000 every time they were run. • Run a business turning over millions of pounds every year with a handful of staff (and he never went to the office – in fact, for a year he didn’t even have a key to his own office – the company ran itself completely). • Tripled the price of a training course and quadrupled the take-up as a result. • Dramatically reduced the need for head office staff by creating 24hr, 365 day a year marketing systems.

• Doubled the size of his business in one year at the same time as reducing overheads and decreasing staff numbers. • Developed marketing techniques that work all year round. If you really want the inside-track on how to turn the workshops/training/seminars into huge profit centres, Mr X can help. If you have some knowledge or skill that other people want to learn, he can show you how to turn your knowledge into a highly valuable training courses. Mr X does not have a website and the publisher of this magazine does not know who he is. You may never have heard of him, but he’s the real deal. If you think you could learn from him and want to benefit from his vast knowledge, then this is what you need to do: Put your business card or brochure in an envelope. Or write your web address and contact details on a piece of paper and put them in an envelope. Then send the envelope to: Mr X, 9 Hill House, 210 Upper Richmond Road, London SW15 6NP The envelope will be forwarded to Mr X at his home address; he will look at your website, read about what you do. If he thinks he can add value and help you make your business more successful, he will send you information about the Bootcamp training, with all the details, the price and dates. He will also tell you who he is. You will have one opportunity to book and he will not contact you again. If you do not hear from him within seven days of sending your details, you have not been accepted. If you meet Mr X you will understand that he only works with ambitious business owners. He does not suffer fools gladly, so please only apply if you are serious about transforming your business. And needless to say he isn’t cheap… but he’s worth every penny. And if you don’t agree, it won’t cost you a penny either. ■

PLEASE APPLY IMMEDIATELY TO INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF ACCEPTANCE.


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