ISSUE SIXTEEN
SUMMER 2009
The Barefoot Doctor
Applying ancient wisdom to current concerns
Belief Audit Clean up your Thinking
New Code NLP
The modern approach
Topher Morrison NLP going mainstream
THE MAGAZINE FOR PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
SUBSCRIPTION ONLY
contents
summer 2009
4 DEBATE Integrity, Money and NLP
10
6 News Anatomy of a Plane Crash Pt. 3 8 Basic NLP
Welcome to another ‘cracking’ issue of Rapport (‘cracking’ because my son’s latest obsession is Wallace and Gromit!)
Creative planning
9 PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT
Is your communication hitting the mark
We have some really thought provoking articles in this issue. As I was reading through them earlier this month I marvelled at the messages that were coming through to me from the features...and I am so grateful that I am part of a field of learning where we are taught to notice these things.
10 NLP
What a fascinating debate Andy has put together (page 4)...not only has he developed the debate around having both integrity and money, he has also elegantly led into an obvious subject for the next issue. So if you are interested in taking part in September’s debate about Diversity within the NLP Community, do please get in touch with us.
18 EDUCATION
I am completely ‘hooked’ on Neil’s serial, ‘Anatomy of a Plane Crash’ (page 6). I am sure it’s because Neil writes so eloquently and honestly about his personal experiences, and pulls together so many elegant applications of NLP! Talking of eloquent and honest, I think we are honoured and privileged to share Rosie’s story of how she has met with and overcome breast cancer (page 28) – if ever there was a role model for dealing with adversity, Rosie is that person. Honesty and reflection does seem to be a theme throughout this issue, from Robert’s ‘Belief Audit Process’ (page 32) to Topher’s observations about the current state of the NLP Community (page 10). Perhaps, bearing in mind ‘Perception is Projection’, this is a reflection of ANLP. We are currently reflecting on our own practices and goals, having recently been awarded a Social Enterprise grant specifically for developing our 5 year Business and Marketing plans...so we have some exciting times ahead
Karen x
38
Topher Morrison
12 COLUMN
Presuppositions of NLP
14 LIFESTYLE
Tibetan Pulsing Healing BrainBox
28
20 LIFESTYLE
Be extra helpful
24 CELEBRITY
The Barefoot Doctor
26 COACHING Southern Railway 28 HEALTH
My left breast
14
24
32 NLP
36 NLP
New Code NLP
38 BUSINESS NLP and entrepreneurs 40 RESEARCH Confessions of a
Cover stories
Belief Audit Process
University lecturer
42 TRAINING & WORKSHOPS
52 REGIONAL GROUPS
Auspicium
44 DIARY 47 BOOK REVIEWS
54 ENDNOTE
Congruency in NLP
48 AUTHOR INTERVIEW
Editorial Team: Caitlin Collins, Andy Coote, Eve Menezes Cunningham Team@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1162 Art Editor: Enzo Zanelli Advertising: David Hammond david@rapportmag.com, 0845 053 1189 Membership, subscriptions and back issues: Lala Ali Khan Members@anlp.org, 0845 053 1162
50 ANLP NEWS
Marcus D’Silva
Publisher: Karen Moxom karen@rapportmag.com 0845 053 1162 Company Reg No. 05390486 Phoenix Publishing Ltd 9 Arlingham House, St Albans Rd, South Mimms EN6 3PH Rapport published by Phoenix Publishing on behalf of ANLP. Design: Square Eye Design
DISCLAIMER The views within this magazine are not necessarily those of the publisher, nor does the publisher endorse the products or services promoted in the magazine. Articles are for information only and intent is to inform. Readers should seek professional advice before adopting any suggestions or purchasing any products herein.
rapport - Summer 2009
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DEBATE
Integrity, Money and NLP Can you have all three? With some Trainers, coaches and therapists who use NLP in their work charging large amounts of money for their services, we ask if it is possible to make a lot of money through NLP and still have integrity in doing so. Andy Coote talks to three Trainers and Coaches of NLP and finds that the question raises a number of key issues.
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Summer 2009 - rapport
M
elody Cheal believes that there is no issue between making money and retaining integrity, “although I can see that others might see it as an issue.” Andy Smith saw “No conflict between integrity and making money whatsoever” whilst Michael Beale was more worried by the question, because it “presupposes that to make money you have to compromise your integrity. I think that is 100% wrong. The inference is that NLP doesn’t work. If you believe that NLP is genuinely useful then I don’t understand the integrity question.” Our first task then seemed obvious. To try to define what we meant by the terms, beginning with Integrity, which, as Cheal points out, “is a nominalisation and tends to be about being
in line with our own values. Integrity therefore is a first person thing.” Andy Smith supports this view and points out a potential issue, “it is possible to have integrity in your own view whilst not having integrity from the other’s perspective.” So, as Michael Beale points out, “if the client has a different value system, we will need to explore that value system and understand what he or she needs.” There is also a third perspective to integrity – that of an outsider, what the law often describes as a ‘reasonable person’ – and whilst this is largely out of the control of the Practitioner, it is something that must be considered. There are things you can do to mitigate this. Smith and Beale both suggest that being congruent and true to your own ethics is a good starting point. Beale also suggests being comfortable with the client’s integrity, which means that “I wouldn’t take on somebody if his or her use of the skills might be outside of my own value system.” There is, however, no easy way to measure integrity and thus, no easy way for a potential client to gain assurance of it. Cheal suggests that the way that measurement can be approached is through behaviours. She suggests some examples, “always doing what I say I will, giving appropriate credit and references for ideas. Working within a Code of Ethics, such as that to which ANLP members sign up, is a good starting point towards measuring the elements of integrity.” “If what you offer is genuinely good”, adds Beale, “there is no need to compromise your integrity.” When talking about money and the making of it, it is important to remember that there are many differing, often emotional, attitudes to it. “Money is a very interesting topic. It can be very symbolic,” suggests Cheal. “Money can become a single focus. Some people are focused on finding the cheapest provider regardless of content,” she adds, “Money can often be used as a measure of self worth. Maybe that singlemindedness says something about their own self-worth.” The need for money can also distort judgement and create ethical issues. “Some people will always grasp at straws and buy short term fixes. If you desperately need money, you may be motivated to respond to adverts offering a six figure annual income from NLP” suggests Beale. Some definitions of Integrity (for example in Wikipedia) talk about the “depth and breadth
DEBATE of a value system”, which led to the question, what are the core NLP values? Smith highlights a document ‘Shared Values of the NLP Community’ written by Robert Dilts in which are identified ‘the twelve core values of the Global NLP Community’ (www.nlpu.com/ Values.htm) which I’ll let you read without replaying it here. As Smith points out, “NLP is not a unified venture and therefore doesn’t have a single mission so other NLP Trainers and commentators may espouse a different set of values though that may be more a difference of tone rather than substance.” If there is not a single value system at play here, and it seems very likely that there is not, how can the customer determine what value they will get from NLP? Cheal contends that in the Corporate sector that is straightforward, “They are more inclined to look at what they get for their money and in most of the organisations where people are put on NLP courses, the person who manages the relationship already tends to value NLP themselves.” Value can be measured in the outputs, agrees Beale, for example “if an NLP course has helped somebody to develop and change greatly in excess of what they’ve paid for the course.” So how can customers find the right option for them? “It is not a perfect market in the economic sense,” notes Smith, “ and although people can review course prices there are many variables to consider. There are, for example, differing durations for courses and the content of an NLP Practitioner course may differ, so there are no exact comparisons. Word-of-mouth is critical in getting and retaining clients.” Cheal widens the discussion to highlight the difficulty in determining the quality of the service being offered. “Not every NLP Trainer is good and the bad experiences can taint all others. This is not directly related to the level of cost. Someone could be selling a course very cheaply and still be very good or selling at a higher price and not be competent.” As well as quality, the other underlying question in this debate is around how you price NLP to deliver value to clients. This may depend on the audience and it also, clearly, depends on the belief system and values of the Trainer or Coach. There are some basic models that can be used but it is how they are exploited that will make the difference. “We suggest to people on our courses that they look at the range of pricing already operating in their type of business. In other words what the market will expect,” says Cheal. “That will differ according to their audience. They also need to know what they need to earn in order to create a living. If they
cannot earn this lower level, then either their business needs to be subsidised or it is not the right approach to take. If NLP is to be a business for you, then you need to earn a living and if you are good at your job then you
very hard to learn NLP from books. Like a martial art or ballet it is about practice as well as knowledge. It is not an intellectual pursuit, you learn by doing it. The danger with books and ebooks is that people can think they know how to use NLP when they don’t.” Smith has concerns about delivering low cost or free training as a model, “there are two possible problems, the participants might not get as much value as if they had invested some money and if the trainer is not making a reasonable living, then energy will go out of it. So, as a business model, it may not be sustainable.” It can work, however, as part of a business model, suggests Cheal. “We offer lowcost places to charities but that is a marketing decision and it is dependent upon charging normal prices for other participants.” However she agrees with Smith that, “There is a danger that if you charge lower prices and get a lower income as a result, this may spiral down and affect quality.” It can become a ‘race to the bottom’ which is no-one’s interests. Integrity, as we have explored, has three positions. We can ensure our own subjective integrity and that of our dealings with clients and trainees. We can use NLP techniques to put ourselves in the position of third parties and examine the possible problems and objections they might have. We can then do a certain amount of risk assessment on that. Value for money is also subjective and can differ by audience and by the level and quality of the service delivered. As Cheal suggests, “It amounts to a fair exchange between the service provider and the recipient. So long as both parties win from the exchange, the transaction works and there can be no issue about integrity.” As Beale puts it , “You have to have integrity to sell NLP otherwise you are not really understanding it at all.” NLP operates in a market that is much wider than just the other NLP providers. It is a very competitive, and global, market. Everyone in it is looking for an advantage. Whilst it is easy to see how NLP service provision can be judged with hindsight, it is more difficult to see how clients can determine what is right for them when selecting a course of action. The very diversity that we value within the NLP community may be a factor in holding it back. But that, as they say, is for another debate.
NLP operates in a market that is much wider than just the other NLP providers. It is a very competitive, and global, market deserve to have a good living.” Whilst this article has focused more on NLP Trainers and Coaches, Smith raises the important caveat that there is a distinction when pricing NLP for therapy. “People who need coaching are usually doing so voluntarily whereas with therapy it is more likely to be a necessary process.” Beale adds that “if you are using NLP as a therapy and you are delving
Integrity /integriti/ (noun) 1. the quality of being honest and morally upright. 2. the state of being whole or unified. 3. soundness of construction. ORIGIN Latin integritas, from integer ‘intact, whole’. Source - Compact Oxford Dictionary
into a person’s psyche, it is most important to be OK with yourself and congruent.” Stretching the market by asking for a price that is above what the market normally expects is also a strategy that is gaining ground in training and coaching. Some commentators suggest a philosophy of doubling or quadrupling your prices. Beale sets out the thinking that underpins that radical approach. “The more you charge, the more value people will get because they will take it much more seriously. The more you charge, the more they will want to learn.” Arguably, this is the strategy used by some of the global gurus and works best when there is a finite amount of resource, in this case time, and the demand for it is high. In order to get into that position, there has been an increase in the use of a related model – that of pricing an event at a premium and then widely offering low cost or free places. Such a model will often depend on merchandise sales at the event and on sales of future courses and coaching. Which raises a further question. How do people who need NLP skills but genuinely cannot afford to pay the prices get access to the knowledge and skills? There are many books and ebooks on NLP that are affordable but, Beale cautions, “it is not impossible but
Participants Melody Cheal - GWiz training, http://www.gwiztraining.com/ Michael Beale - PPI Business NLP, http://www.ppimk.com/ Andy Smith - Coaching Leaders, http://practicaleq.com/
rapport - Summer 2009
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NEWS
Anatomy of a Plane Crash Part 3 By Neil Almond
H
ave you ever watched someone being airlifted into a helicopter on telly? It looks fun doesn’t it? Almost something you’d line up to try. Well maybe it’s just a question of context, but after crashing into the ocean in a light aircraft (as reported in the last two editions of this fine magazine) and treading water for close to an hour praying for rescue, the experience was somewhat different. I never realised, for instance, how difficult it is to breathe under a chopper - it almost feels like the air is being sucked out of your lungs. Nor had I considered that the spray would be quite so painful - imagine being in a jet wash with someone squirting the pressure-hose directly at your face and you might come close. I also hadn’t ever really imagined how physically debilitating shock and exposure could be. But all that said, we were being rescued and that felt amazing. The emotions were so mixed up that when the chopper flew off having rescued the pilot and our two co-passengers, leaving Andy and I still bobbing in the water, we weren’t sure whether to be grateful for the delicious peace and respite from the physical discomfort or panicked that we were being left behind. We decided to use the time to float out on our time lines to 15 minutes beyond our safe arrival back on dry land and look back on ourselves celebrating our rescue. We’d only known Nina and Henry a short time, but it’s amazing how an intense experience such as a plane crash can give you a deep knowing about someone’s true character. We knew they would sooner bite their own legs off than leave us behind. We knew the chopper would return. It did. 15 minutes later it was our turn to be winched to safety, Andy first, then me. I won’t describe the winching process but will say that once the initial flood of relief from being out of the water had passed we began to realise that the submodalities of flight had rearranged - an involuntary version of the NLP ‘Like to Dislike‘ script. The last place we wanted to be was in the air - oh why couldn’t they send a boat? I suppose this is only natural, we had of course just fallen from the sky. But we’d always loved flying and now I was experiencing something close to a phobic
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Summer 2009 - rapport
reaction that was taking every bit of my NLP training to keep in check - I was petrified! We arrived after the longest 20 minute flight of my life at MacKay hospital. And it was here that the magnitude of what we’d experienced really started to hit. As we jumped down from the helicopter we were greeted by an army of wheel chairs and gurneys. It was obvious they didn’t know what state we’d be in - that we could walk was a great surprise. To be honest, that we were there was a surprise; we learned afterwards that in nine out of ten cases a plane like ours, with fixed undercarriage, would flip and roll when it hit the water, trapping the passengers inside or killing them on impact. We were
Photograph: RACQ – CQ RESCUE
lucky to be alive, and the richness of life had never tasted sweeter. After several hours in hospital we retreated to a local motel which, thank goodness, had been arranged for us - our brains were incapable of such a simple act as booking a room (which when you consider that Andy was at the time Planning and Risk Manager on the £5.5b Channel Tunnel Rail Link project is saying something). In truth the next few hours are a bit of a blur. I do however remember that there were three things that I learnt that night which will enhance my knowledge as a coach - the therapeutic
power of debriefing after traumatic events, the importance of truly honouring and pacing significant emotional experiences and the true medicinal properties of red wine! The kinaesthetic of that night will stay with me forever; as I’m sure will the friendship of Nina and Henry. I didn’t sleep a great deal that night, and my numb and glazed feelings can’t have been helped by the righteous hangover I was experiencing. Ahead of us we had an immediate test of a one and a half hour flight back to Brisbane to try to arrange new passports. As you can imagine the idea of setting foot back on an aircraft was terrifying. The imminent flight and the 24 hour ordeal of flying back to the UK were going to take every ounce of our NLP training, and with your permission I’d love to cover that more fully in the next edition of Rapport. I’ll also save for now the incredible opportunity we had to explore the very best and very worst of customer service in a crisis and the subsequent learnings about how best a company can support and manage customers who’ve experienced trauma and how NLP can play a vital role in this. It is incredible how much gold can come from even the darkest of events. Our experience has been that through some combination of taking responsibility for results and compassionate reframing it is possible to transform a potential turd on your time line into a beautiful rose. A version of that transformation could be the book I am in the process of writing which focuses on overcoming the fear of flying - let’s face it, who better to pace and lead the experience than someone who has them-self fallen from the sky. I’m in the process of testing some of the models we’ve established and would love to hear from anyone who’d like an even better relationship with flying, or indeed anyone who has overcome the fear for themselves and is willing to be modelled. I can be contacted at neil@neilalmond.com. I look forward to hearing from you, or sharing the results in the next edition of Rapport. neil@neilalmond.com
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BASIC NLP
INTRODUCING NLP Outcomes 4: Creative Planning By Caitlin Collins
I
n this series on ‘Introducing NLP’ we’re following a thread on which to string some of the basic ideas and practical exercises of NLP. Under the umbrella theme of setting outcomes we’ll be looking at how NLP can help us to discover what we want and then achieve it. Now we’re going to engage in some creative planning that could well be called ‘How to Manage your Inner Critic’; instead, it’s better known as the Disney Planning Strategy. It’s said that Walt Disney was a whiz at planning. He understood very well the common human tendency to shoot a dream before it has a chance to flap its fuzzy little winglets! Walt came up with a way to control the over-zealous inner critic, while still allowing it to express its extremely valuable critical faculty. I’ve no idea if this is literally true, but apparently Walt used three rooms for planning. His staff would dream up ideas in the first room, move to the second to develop a realistic action plan, and go to the third to present the plan to others who would look for flaws; then they would go to and fro between the second and third rooms until the plan had got past the critics. NLP innovator Robert Dilts has developed an elegant exercise with universal application based on Walt’s model. Here’s how you do it!
1. Label three pieces of paper, Dreamer,
3. Taking an idea you want to work with
Realist, and Critic, and set them out on the floor. Add a fourth place, Observer, to one side.
in this exercise, step into Dreamer and assume your Dreamer stance. Let your imagination fly! What might it be like if...? What’s important about it? What could it lead to? What is enticing you forwards? How would it look? Feel? Sound? Taste and smell?
2. Anchor the three main places in the following way. i) Step into the Dreamer position. Remember or imagine a wonderful dream you’ve had. Notice your stance: it may help to look up and far away, and to smile; notice how happy and excited you feel. Then step off the Dreamer position and break your state by distracting yourself: imagine painting your front door pink! ii) Step into the Realist position. Recreate a state in which you were efficiently planning something. Notice your stance: look straight ahead; try imagining holding a clipboard and pen! Then step off the Realist position and break state: give your front door purple stripes! iii) Step into the Critic position. Recreate a state in which you were analysing a situation, considering implications and consequences, alert to possible problems. Notice your stance: try tilting your head and narrowing your eyes, as though pondering. Then step off the Critic position and break state: a spotted front door might startle the neighbours!
4. Move into Realist. Design an action plan to bring your dream about. What steps will you need to take to realise your dream?
5. Move into Critic. Analyse and question the plan. (Not the dream the plan. Never criticise the dream.) How achievable is it, as presented? What might the obstacles be? Might there be any unwanted consequences? What advice would you give the Realist planner? What would need to be different about the plan for you, as Critic, to be OK with it?
6. Move back and forth between Realist and Critic, changing stance as you change place (you may like to deliberately break state in between the two places) until you have negotiated a workable plan.
7. If at any point you need a fresh perspective on the process, step outside the system to the Observer position and comment on what’s going on. Advise yourself on how you could make better use of this planning process. The Disney framework can also be useful in meetings. Allocate stages in the meeting for each of these steps. Appreciate the value of your critics, but keep them under control and insist on their criticism being constructive and aimed only at the plan, never at the dream. Watch out for people who favour one of the three positions: encourage them to contribute at the right stage and restrain them from destabilising the process by jumping in at other times! Caitlin Collins: www.naturalmindmagic.com cait@globalnet.co.uk
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Summer 2009 - rapport
PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT
Is Your Communication Hitting the Mark? By Mindy Gibbins-Klein
W
hat do your books and articles, your speaking and training, and your one-to-one client interactions all have in common? In every case, there is a message you would like to share. I appreciate that communication sometimes is a dialogue and this article focuses on the part of the conversation where you are transmitting information or guiding the client (so not pure open coaching questions). In particular, we’ll be looking at ways to ensure you hit the mark with your audience, more effectively and more often. Tony Robbins is a recognised master of effective communication. One of the reasons he is so successful is that he has never flinched from the responsibility of delivering messages of tough love, and he does so with respect and always in rapport. An expert in NLP techniques, Tony effortlessly tackles even the touchiest subjects and the most cynical clients, creating trust and commitment at every stage. This is true for his books, videos and web material as well as face-to-face communication. A good coach can see the solution before the
A perfect balance The answer is a perfect balance between what you want to say and what your reader or listener needs to hear. I will call them ‘the customer’ for the rest of this article. We all have plenty of information and ideas we would like to share with our customers, but just like you cannot drink a gallon of water in one sitting, the customer will have a limit to the amount he or she can take, and it helps if they are thirsty! Passion is great and it sometimes comes across as selling or preaching. From experience, I think most people prefer other means of persuasion to selling and preaching. Simply being aware of the need for balance is a start. Then you can look at what you would like to convey and figure out how much to share, at what pace and what tone you should take to hit the mark. How to Hit the Mark with the customer Most of us are pretty good at verbal communications. Before you set out to write anything - a book, an article, a blog or even an email - get into the head of the customer. In NLP terms, we might call this association. But how do we know what attributes to associate with? You need to do an inventory of what you already know about the customer. Use all 5 senses. Go back to an experience with an ideal customer and ask yourself what they were like. At The Book Midwife, for example, we do a demographic and psychographic analysis, followed by an in-depth needs analysis where we are obsessed with getting to the heart of the customer’s pain. What issues are they struggling with? It’s our belief that unless what you have to offer resolves key areas of pain for the customer, your solution will be seen as a ‘nice to have’ instead of a ‘must have’. This is all basic marketing. It should be common sense, but as we know, common sense is not that common. If your messages are not
A good coach can see the solution before the client can, but they need to pace and lead the conversation, remaining sensitive to the other person’s feelings client can, but they need to pace and lead the conversation, remaining sensitive to the other person’s feelings. And the stronger the message, the more care you need to take. Many of us need to communicate strong messages at times, and it is essential to do so in rapport with the client. As I have said in previous issues of this magazine, written communication can be even more challenging than verbal, since you do not get the immediate feedback and the ability to build rapport using multiple modalities. So, what tone should you take and how far can you go in order to inspire without breaking rapport?
getting through to the customer, consider doing this sort of customer profiling. If you cannot answer the questions with confidence, a survey or questionnaire can be a helpful tool. Get customers to profile themselves and tell you what their biggest concerns are. Then your job is easy. Create a solid link between the information you have to share and the customer’s concern. You can create links between just about any two ideas if you put some thought into it, and you will hit the mark more accurately and more often. Have fun!
Mindy Gibbins-Klein the UK’s leading writing and publishing strategist, best known as The Book Midwife and co-founder/director of Ecademy Press business publishing. Her mission is to create thousands of real thought leaders who will change business and society with their ideas. An international speaker, trainer and consultant with 20 years in marketing, training and coaching, and over 100 clients who have written and published excellent books and articles quickly using the Book Midwife methodology, Mindy writes and speaks to thousands of executives, business leaders and entrepreneurs each year about how to become a thought leader and turning expertise into enhanced credibility and more business.
rapport - Summer 2009
| 9
NLP
NLP - Going Mainstream? Topher Morrison discusses NLP today By Caitlin Collins
I
have a lot of fun interviewing the great, the good, and some others for Rapport magazine, and I was looking forward to a chat with one of NLP’s major players in the person of Topher Morrison. I love American energy and enthusiasm; unlike some of the more reticent Brits, extracting usable material from whom can be akin to a dental procedure, American NLPers are generally outgoing and voluble, which makes for happy interviewing. Topher not only exceeded my enthusiasm expectations, he was cheerfully and generously outspoken in his views. He’s well-placed to air those views. Based in Florida, author, motivational speaker and NLP Master Trainer Topher travels extensively delivering NLP trainings throughout America and abroad, including the UK, Australia and Singapore; he’s in touch with what’s going on within the NLP communities in several countries.
What is less exciting is how the NLP community continues to fail to take up such opportunities for expansion.
NLP hits the mainstream Our discussion starts on a high note. Topher is enthusiastic about his two recent forays into the world of film-making. The Compass appeared in February, with a cast familiar from earlier films ‘The Secret’ and ‘What the Bleep Do We Know?’ (two of Topher’s favourite movies). ‘This new one’s about a guy travelling through an unknown land, and what he encounters on his journey,’ he explains. ‘It’s about learning to follow your inner compass and taking action to bring about what you want. The producer had attended one of my courses and wanted a strong NLP input in the film, so he brought in Al and Marilyn Sargent, from California, and me. Then the second movie is due out in the Fall. It’s a docu-drama called ‘Riches’, the story of a woman who goes from nothing to everything. It’s about wealth-creation, and I talk about the influence of the mind over matter.’ What is so exciting about these initiatives is that they’re taking NLP out to enormous audiences, with all the implications for benefit that go along with that exposure.
NLP doesn’t hit the mainstream As our conversation ranges into the murky waters of why, with the wealth of benefits NLP has to offer, it has undeniably continued to remain in the background, Topher begins to warm up. I tentatively raise the glowing cluster of hot topics that includes credibility, regularisation, standards, accountability, ethics... It’s an important issue for Topher, so much so that he returns to it repeatedly during our discussion. ‘The NLP Training Institutions are private schools, run for profit; there is too much selfinterest,’ he says, emphatically. ‘The irony is that all the trainers talk about teaching the skills for communication and rapport, but as an industry we have failed miserably to walk our talk and use those skills to agree on standards. It’s shocking. This is an issue everywhere: America, Australia, the UK. Wherever there is NLP, the same political stories are occurring. It’s like the current crisis in the economy - everyone talks about wanting to change things, but very few are willing to take steps, personally, to make those changes. ‘The problems with ethics and standards are causing separation, as people distance themselves from NLP. They change the name of what they’re doing; Tony Robbins was the first major one to do it, and others have followed. It’s dissolving the identity of NLP.’ Not going out much in the wider NLP world myself, and having met only one major Trainer who gave me the willies, I’m slightly startled by what he says next. ‘I could count on one hand the number of high-level Trainers who are pleasant and trustworthy and nice to be around. I’ve lost friends because I speak out, but I say it anyway: personal development is one of the most inauthentic fields, next to politics and Hollywood! We’re trying to clean up the neighbourhood without putting our own house in order.’
Personal development is one of the most inauthentic fields, next to politics and Hollywood!
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NLP
We must keep coming back to our own authenticity NLP could hit the mainstream ‘So, what can we do to improve things?’ I ask. ‘We need to make a transition like the chiropractors did. Chiropractics was new, and there were questions about standards, and the practitioners had to put aside their personal interests and pull together. Our next step is to get some of the key figures and the main organisations, like ANLP and others, and get them together - and, guess what? - they’ll need to work with rapport and a focus on their intended outcome - just as is taught in NLP! If the major certifying bodies would get together, they could sort out standards, Accreditation and training. NLP is still small enough for people to see the benefits of joining forces within their community. I believe your own ANLP’s Karen Moxom would be an ideal person to lead such an initiative! And I would love to come to that meeting!’ Topher continues, adding, ‘I’m told the British sometimes think that America leads the way in the Personal Development field. But if you ask an American, they’d say the British are at the cutting-edge. No-one’s a prophet in their own country! We need to appreciate our own geniuses!’ Topher sees a global trend within industry and patterns of commerce that is relevant to NLP. ‘Over the last few years things have been becoming increasingly niched; for example we’re getting many more specific-interest TV channels and magazines. The most successful NLP Trainers are running niched courses; they’re offering targeted trainings
for sales, coaching, therapists, not generic ones any more. But whatever they’re doing, and however successful they may seem, some of these trainers aren’t promoting NLP; they’re promoting inauthenticity. Ethical standards are vital. The home page of every NLP certifying body talks about ethical standards, but who enforces it? The problem is that, if they get a complaint, the organisations think they can’t afford to kick someone out because then they’ll lose revenue. But we’ve got to start kicking people out! We need self-regulation before inviting official regulation.’ Topher has mentioned the application of NLP in increasingly targeted ways. Knowing that he has a particular interest in global issues and the environment, I ask him how he thinks NLP might contribute in a wider sense. ‘The presuppositions,’ is his immediate response. ‘We don’t appreciate them enough. They are brilliant! They work for larger collectives like countries as well as for businesses and individuals, and they can be applied to global crises. But we need local shift before we get global shift. We must keep coming back to our own authenticity; we must put our own house in order!’ I’m left with a sense of hope following this conversation. I would love to see the benefits of NLP better known and appreciated among the wider public - and there has never been more urgency for bringing powerful change to the world as now in this time of global crisis. How about it, UK NLPers - can we rise to the challenge and accept a leading role in taking NLP mainstream?
Topher Morrison: www.tophermorrison.com
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COLUMN
The Presuppositions of NLP Mind and Body Affect Each Other
By Caitlin Collins
T
he NLP presuppositions are tools to help us transcend limiting beliefs about ourselves and our world. You don’t have to believe or disbelieve any presupposition; just consider the implications of acting ‘as if ’ you believed it, imagining the differences doing so could make to your life. This is a deceptively simple statement that expands like a Tardis when you open the door. Philosophical discussion about the relationship of mind
to matter goes back thousands of years to ancient India; in the West the debate comes via ancient Greece to the present day, when much discussion revolves around the mechanism of exactly how a non-material agency can influence matter. Generally more pragmatic than philosophical, NLP is less interested in the debate than in how we can make skilful use of whatever interaction of mind and body occurs, however it happens!
And the fact of its happening is undeniable. Elsewhere in this issue of Rapport there’s an account of one woman’s experience of cancer, and how the constructive way she thought, managed her emotions and used creative mental images affected that process, contributing to her leaving hospital just three days after major surgery with no need for pain medication. And, still in the medical world, the placebo effect is another example of
mind influencing body, as are psychosomatic symptoms and stress disorders. The other way around, we can all come up with examples of our body affecting our mind. What about mind-altering drugs? Not just the exotic ones, but liquor and nicotine and the good old British cup of tea all make us feel better, perking us up or calming us down. And hormones, anyone? They’re mind-altering all right! Not to mention the food we eat, and our physical state - even our posture affects our thoughts and feelings. Scientist Masaru Emoto is researching the capacity of water molecules to respond to thoughts and feelings, as indicated by the crystals they form. Given that the bodies of living beings are largely water, if the molecules of water within them are sensitive to mental transmissions, this could be one way in which our minds can affect our own bodies - and those of others. His research endorses what the wise have been saying for years: we should be very careful how we think - we have more power, and therefore both more opportunity and more responsibility, than we might have believed. Caitlin Collins: www.naturalmindmagic.com cait@globalnet.co.uk
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LIFESTYLE
TIBETAN PULSING
HEALING A TANTRIC BODYWORK From Hollywood to London - a fast track method for connecting with your energy. By Joseph Mevlanna Pritchard
H
ollywood, LA 1980. An unlikely setting for the rediscovery of ancient Tibetan monastic healing techniques - but it happened. Instead of Bandler and Grinder - think Dheeraj and Prabhuta; instead of transformational grammar - Tibetan iridology; instead of language patterns - the pulse beat; instead of programming the mind a journey from mind to heart. Now instead of Hollywood 1980 - London 2009. Susanne became the partner of Sw. Shantam Dheeraj in 1980. Together they developed Tibetan Pulsing Healing. In Los Angeles, Susanne worked the Hollywood circuit and attracted famous singers, actors, and media stars to their work. It made creative people more creative. Later they founded the Osho Tibetan Pulsing Institute in Pune, India, becoming directors in 1988. Having researched and practised for over thirty years, Susanne brings Tibetan Pulsing School of Transformation and its powerful healing techniques to the UK and the international community. She says: ‘Philosophy is not enough for our evolution, it does not bring change. We need to process
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Philosophy is not enough for our evolution, it does not bring change. We need to process the layers inside our bio-electricity, our nervous system… we need to work directly with the energy the layers inside our bio-electricity, our nervous system… we need to work directly with the energy.’ And this is what pulsing does. It works directly with the energy.
You can address a physical symptom like a broken leg, or take a refining meditative approach. Susanne explains: ‘As well as being a deeply effective healing technique, Tibetan pulsing is also a unique system for understanding human consciousness. All our emotional sufferings and psychological problems are manifestations of bio-electrical blockages in our nervous system. In order to dissolve those blockages, we combine our bio-electrical energy with the pulse beat of our heart in a meditative way.’ According to Susanne, human consciousness is contained inside the electrical current. One way to bring consciousness to an area is to bring an electrical current to that area. A deep relaxation occurs bringing with it silence and meditation. Pain is transformed into pleasure. Heart attacks, stomach and food problems, broken bones, nervous disorders and fatigue can all be healed. Creativity, energy, vitality and intimacy can be enhanced. Susanne says: ‘It does not work by analysing the mind: the pulse goes to the roots of problems such as depression, emotional anxiety,
LIFESTYLE
and physical pain. The pulse beat treats psychological illness and brings awareness into the subconscious, leading to the transformation of difficulties with intimacy, relating, and unresolved childhood issues.’ Practical and mystical at the same time, the benefits include: healing physical body function, healing emotional function, healing psychological function - and unifying body mind and spirit. Working on himself first, then Susanne, Sw. Shantam Dheeraj discovered that by feeling the pulse with his hands, while making sound, deeply rooted tension and emotional blocks started to pulsate, release, and heal. Tension, pain, charge - and even tumours - disappeared. Susanne fills in the history: ‘In the early days of Tibetan Pulsing, Dheeraj wrote a book of poems on the internal organs and showed it to Dujan Rimpoche who was in L.A. Dujan patted the book and said “Yes, yes, old Tibetan book”. Dheeraj replied “No, I’ve only just written this”. Dujan laughed and said “Yes, yes, old Tibetan book”.’ For over thirty years, Dheeraj constructed maps of electrical circuits in the body and
wrote on the psychological conditions of the internal organs. Susanne partnered as co-developer, muse, personal laboratory, co-founder of the Tibetan Pulsing School of Transformation - and group facilitator to thousands. The eye is a window to the soul, recording anything that damages our nervous system in the form of markings on the iris. Every physical, emotional or psychological shock causes a scar, a blockage in our nervous system where the electrical current can no longer pass freely. These shocks and blockages show in the iris as readable markings. From these markings, Tibetan Pulsing Iridology allows you to diagnose the organ circuit to work with. For example: in the case of some addictions, the gall bladder circuit is prominent; for issues of perception, the kidney circuit; creativity, the pancreas… Connecting the electrical circuit through the pulse beat transforms the organ function and allows for multi-dimensional healing - physical, emotional, mental and unified dimensions. After diagnosis, the application to the pulse
beat is hands-on, feet-on and body-on-body; connecting pulse beats according to the maps Dheeraj channelled. Susanne summarises: ‘Working with the body is powerful, for all is interconnected and can be accessed through the body, through the pulse beat.’ Evidence is plentiful. Miracles do happen and healing can be instantaneous. Jane, from Lugana Beach USA, tells her story: ‘I suffered a complicated break with my ankle and had it in plaster for a year - but it would not heal. Some friends told me about Dheeraj and Susanne coming to Luguna Beach at the weekend…Dheeraj put his hands on either side of the break, Susanne worked on my head …I felt something like an electric shock going through my leg… a month later the X ray showed the bone was now growing. My ankle is now fine again.’ Susanne Prabhuta tells the next story - about breast cancer: “Angela (New York) flew to India on her intuition wanting to heal a huge breast cancer. I was reluctant to take the case on - explaining what the process really means - after a few
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LIFESTYLE
sessions the blocked emotions start to surface and the person usually panics and wants to leave. After many discussions, and a considerable deposit - taken in case she wanted to stop - we began work. Angela received sessions twice a day. After about 15 sessions she wanted to leave but I reminded her of her wish to heal and that she had to face the buried feelings - or keep the tumour and lose her deposit. She decided to continue. After 54 sessions - about three weeks - the tumour appeared to be gone. Angela was then given back her deposit and flew to New York for a medical assessment. The scans came back clear, she continued to send reports for 7 years - and has remained clear.’ Tibetan Pulsing Healing is for anyone with an interest and willingness to explore the way
emotion manifests in the body, the impact this has on our health - and how we feel... or don’t feel. Feelings connect us to life argues Susanne:
Working with the body is powerful, for all is interconnected and can be accessed through the body, through the pulse beat
‘It is for anyone who has issues around touch and nourishment, or has reached a stuck place in their life, or senses that their health issues may have an underlying emotional cause, or is stressed and physically tense, or who wants to clear the past.’ Susanne also recommends Tibetan Pulsing Healing for practitioners, therapists and health professionals in related fields: ‘This work offers insight into a psychological framework of the organs - a unique diagnostic tool which recognises that our organs store our subconscious - and create behavioural patterns and emotional effects in the physical body. It began with people in the creative arts and is wonderful for boosting creativity: for film producers, script writers, artists, musicians or dancers...’ And it is especially for people who want some time ‘in’, with themselves, to relax, refocus and re-energise - or for couples who are interested in tantra and wish to open up to more intimacy. Hollywood was thirty years ago. Dheeraj has passed on. Susanne, a reluctant world leader, now works from Barnet in London, Parimal in Germany and Moscow in Russia. Her team is multi-national, multi-lingual and trans-continental. Today there are multiple opportunities to access this work: on an individual basis, through weekend seminars, or on the flagship Intensive programme - 48 days of energy work, music, iridology, theatre, meditation and vegetarian food. Susanne herself is highly skilled at tuning into the group and facilitating energy transformation. Her ability is to inspire people into loving themselves, healing themselves and getting results in their lives. She says: ‘Pulsing is a fast track method of connecting with your energy and transforming blocks, patterns and shocks but - you have to really want it - you have to process yourself.’ Tibetan Pulsing Healing - A Tantric Bodywork: for more information email: omprabhuta@yahoo.com; or telephone 0044 (0) 1707 663817; or visit www.tibetanpulsinghealing.co.uk Author: Joseph is interested in Strategy for a New World™. Contact by email joseph@zeteticmind.com; mobile telephone 07887 513369; http://www.zeteticmind.com Photography ©Mahendra (François Toujan)
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Transform Your Life with John Seymour - the longest established NLP Trainer in the UK NLP Practitioner – Bristol commencing 10th & 11th October 2009
NLP Master Practitioner – Bristol commencing 24th & 25th October 2009
Introducing NLP 26th & 27th September 2009 - Bristol 3rd & 4th October 2009 - London Call Maxine or Patricia on 0845 658 0654 for more details or visit: www.john-seymour-associates.co.uk
TRAINING CHANGES TREACLENLPTRAINING CERTIFIED NLP TRAINER TRAINING With Graham Morris, INLPTA Certified Master Trainer of NLP Robert Smith, INLPTA Certified Master Trainer of NLP Become a Certified NLP Trainer and run your own courses Unlike any other Trainer Training you will be presenting to real NLP students doing Practitioner and Master Practitioner courses 20-23 Aug; 24-27 Sept; 8-11 Oct; 14-15 Nov; 11-13 Dec Entry: Master Practitioner Certificate Self-funding: £2,500 Corporate: £3,250 Comprehensive payment plans available From a previous Trainer Training participant: “I’m immensely grateful to have been trained by two wonderful trainers who ‘walk the talk’” Location: Cheltenham, England Details/Booking is via Training Changes www.trainingchanges.co.uk email: graham@trainingchanges.co.uk
Tel: +44 0(1)242 580640 M: 07711 370980
EDUCATION
BRAINBOX Deborah Bone By Eve Menezes Cunningham
W
hen we get anxious or angry, it’s hard to think straight. We often get so caught up in the emotions that triggered it, we just react. By taking a step back, even if nothing else has changed, it’s easier to get a grip over our emotions. There’s the old “Count to ten” trick, but taking deep breaths or walking away from the situation can also help. Psychotherapist and BrainBox creator Deborah Bone takes this further. The BrainBox shows people what is actually going on in their brains by using recycled computer parts and wiring as a metaphor for the human brain. Deborah became aware of more and more people having anxiety related disorders while working as an Emotional & Mental Health Advisor for a Primary Care Trust. A ChildLine report published in February 2007 echoed this feeling. Because most of her work is with children, she focused on a way to help them through it but the BrainBox can be used to help people of all ages. Frustratingly, when we’re worried or stressed, it becomes almost impossible for us to learn. Deborah says, “Being highly emotionally aroused literally makes us stupid.” For children who find it hard to concentrate, this often shows up as destructive behaviour which not only hurts them but slows down their peers (and makes life at the front of the classroom exhausting for the teacher). Deborah’s training as a Human Givens Psychotherapist and NLP Practitioner helped her focus on finding solutions. She wanted to use a metaphor that would make sense for the children she worked with, as well as adults. “The BrainBox was one of those four o’clock in the morning things,” says Deborah. “I woke up early thinking about how I could explain to young people what’s happening in their brain when they get anxious or angry. I’ve always been very passionate about mental health and the computer analogy is helpful for children. My husband is used to me waking up at 4am. We have a lot of computers around so we took one apart and made the BrainBox from recycled parts. “Different computer pieces are used to represent different parts of the brain and these are connected with wires and crocodile clips. The BrainBox shows how messages are sent between three different parts of the brain.” In 2007, the BrainBox won the 2007 national
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McQueen Award for “Excellence in Practice.” Now Deborah is keeping her fingers crossed for another award. She says, “We’ve been short listed for an NHS Innovation award. I’m presenting next week and will be attending an awards dinner with Jo Brand.” While awards are wonderful, Deborah loves the feedback she gets from watching people using it. She says, “Anyone who sees it says, ‘Wow! Why wasn’t I told that before? That really makes sense now.’ School nurses
Explaining what is happening to their brains helps people understand their own anger, anxiety and worries better are using the BrainBox in assemblies to help students prepare for exams.” “We have the worst emotional and mental health in the whole of Europe. For young people, especially, there are anger issues,” says Deborah. Although Deborah hasn’t personally experienced the extremes of anger and anxiety many of the people she works with battle, like everyone she says, “I had some problems when I was anxious. I wondered what was happening inside my brain when I took an exam and went blank. And I’ve always been passionate about helping people.” While they knew they had a great idea from their chisel box prototype, Deborah says it was challenging to come up with a product they could sell. “We’ve broken even now,” she says. “And we’ve done it all on our own with a bit of help and advice from Business Link.” Parents love it too. “It helps them understand why they’ve got a teenager who is using the stupid part of their brain,” says Deborah. They learn about their own brains, too. Explaining what is happening to their brains helps people understand their own anger, anxiety and worries better. “We teach them techniques like taking time out and breathing techniques to reconnect
the brain. We also use a lot of visualisation by paying attention to the client’s map of the world. By finding out what kind of thing has helped them relax previously, we can make it big and bright and bold. When they do that, their brains can reconnect and their breathing slows.” As for hopes for the future, Deborah says, “We’re hoping it’s going to win the award. We’ll get a lot more support in developing the server. We want to refine the product and there’s potential for a BrainBox game, cards and pencil cases. I’d like to develop more resources around it. “It would be great if every school had one but it’s helpful for adults, too. It can be used to help people prepare for job interviews by helping people understand what’s happening. It’s almost impossible to think straight when you’re anxious because your brain is sending stress signals. You can use the BrainBox to demonstrate and teach how important it is to learn to relax.” This can help people not just with exams and interviews but driving tests, stage fright, dating or any other event that typically makes them anxious. While Deborah had been looking for something to use, the demand took her by surprise. She says, “I was using my chisel box prototype and people were saying, ‘I want one. Where can I buy one?’ We’ve sold them to educational psychologists, youth offending teams, school nurses, youth workers and other people working with 0-19 year olds.”
EDUCATION
HELP YOUR BRAIN RELAX By practicing relaxation techniques on a regular basis, it will be much easier for your (or your child) to anchor this more helpful state. This will help you access it when things get stressful and enable your brain to reconnect more quickly: 1. Make sure you’re sitting comfortably. Take some deep breaths in and out. 2. Scan your body for any tension you may be holding onto. Let it all out with each exhalation. 3. Deepen your sense of wellbeing by thinking back to a time when you felt completely safe and relaxed. 4. Think about this time in detail. What could you see? What sounds were you aware of? How did you feel? Were there any special tastes or smells? 5. What happens if you make the feelings stronger? The colours brighter? The sounds louder? Experiment with the submodalities until your relaxing memory feels just right for you. 6. Anchor it in some way that will help you recreate this wonderful feeling any time tension and anxiety bubbles. 7. Practice regularly to strengthen your new tool. Test it out in stressful situations and improve it until it’s just right for you.
UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN BEHAVIOUR BETTER It’s not just young people who feel stupid when their reptilian brains take over. Have you ever tried to break a habit (maybe smoking, drinking, self harming, shopping or overeating)? Logically, you probably know a thousand reasons to stop. Yet sometimes, when stressed, you lose control? “When the brain disconnects, you’re temporarily stupid,” says Deborah. “So when nicotine levels drop, the reptilian brain sends signals: ‘Hang on! There may be some danger here!’ This speeds up the heartbeat and breathing. You become temporarily stupid and go out and have a cigarette because the drug is so strong.” So next time you lapse, be kind to yourself (as you’d be with a small child). Remind your reptilian brain that you’re safe and aim to keep going. What can you do differently next time you want to smoke / shop etc.? Again, by practicing relaxation techniques, you can use them to reconnect and this will minimise cravings for your usual fix.
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LIFESTYLE
How being extra helpful can be good for business By Eve Menezes Cunningham
R
ecently, I was stranded with a broken down bike. I called the local cab company and explained the situation but they couldn’t get a large enough vehicle out to me for another hour or so. Hearing the resignation in my voice, the operator suddenly suggested I try their competitor and saved me a long wait in the cold. Now more than ever, businesses - large and small - need to stand out from the competition. Going the extra mile is a simple yet often overlooked way of doing this. We remember the times companies have done this because it’s out of the ordinary. “An Innocent smoothie exploded over my jacket. On the tube. And it was white. I emailed them to complain and they offered to send me vouchers,” says Anne. Their actions helped her forget her irritation. She told lots of people how nice they’d been and still buys their smoothies. If you’ve disappointed someone, offering them something that is too similar may make it worse. By thinking about another way to treat them, you might not only stop that customer or client walking away but you can turn a mistake into positive PR. Rachel didn’t have change for a £10 note at the end of a cab ride with a firm she’d never used before. She says, “I offered to go and get some change from a nearby shop, but the driver said it was his fault not having change and I could owe it to them.” Sometimes, it’s easier to be generous when you don’t feel defensive about having made a mistake. But this is an even more memorable way to set yourself apart. “iTunes were so, so helpful when my laptop was pinched,” says Camilla. “They arranged for me to have free downloads of everything I’d already paid for. I didn’t expect it and was really pleased. I’ve mentioned it to loads of people and wouldn’t hesitate to buy from them again over any other music download service.” Are there things you could offer in similar situations that wouldn’t leave you out of pocket but impact positively on your clients/customers? Day to day buying decisions are often made based on those little touches. “I find Sainsbury’s staff are invariably very helpful,” says Laura. “If you forget something, they will go and fetch it for you. If you don’t know where something is, they will take you to the relevant aisle. Waitrose staff are also excellent. Morrisons’ are warm, friendly and helpful. It’s a recession - they all need to go that extra mile. After all, it’s what we do
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with our clients all the time isn’t it?” Olivia says, “I bought a make it yourself cookbook and then broke it (due to extreme stupidity on my part). When I called customer services, I was sure they’d tell me it was all my own fault but they were lovely. A new one arrived in the post a few days later.” When someone’s been let down, even just doing a good job is enough to set us apart. Other times, it’s not about the job you’re doing but the
LIFESTYLE
Offer to help when you’re doing so from a place of fullness - you want to but know you don’t have to
unexpected support you can provide. “At my last job we had a man from Computer Angels in to sort out some issues with our network,” says Suzi. “While he was there, the kettle somehow caught fire. Whilst my colleagues watched, alarmed, the guy took control of the situation and put out the fire. They were all full of praise for him by the time I returned to the office.” Hopefully, nothing so dramatic will crop up for you. But there are often times when a client needs a different type of service to the one you were prepared to provide. By pointing someone in the right direction or recommending someone you trust, you can save them a lot of time and earn yourself some easy brownie points. Recently, one of my editors asked me loads of questions about a feature she was thinking about. Wanting to be helpful (even though I was already juggling several deadlines), I made a few calls, did some mini-interviews and sent her the information. I then had a sudden flash
of regret that I wasn’t a staff writer – I’d done it all for nothing. But then, a couple of days later, she phoned commissioning me to write the piece. Yes, putting in that extra effort is always a bit risky. Sometimes, you can bend over backwards to help a current or potential client only to discover that they never had any intention of paying you. But generally, everyone feels good when we approach business with a sense of goodwill. Freelance journalist and copywriter, Anne Wollenberg says, “A potential new client asked me to do something at very short notice. I didn’t have the expertise for it, which would have been OK if it hadn’t been a short-notice request. But rather than say ‘No’, I said, ‘Give me half an hour and I’ll find you someone else who can do it’. “I rang round people I knew would be able to do it, found someone, made sure they were free and happy to take on the assignment and called the editor with their details. The editor was delighted I’d helped him out of a hole and is now a regular client. All because I stuck my neck out and
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LIFESTYLE
It’s a recession - they all need to go that extra mile. After all, it’s what we do with our clients all the time isn’t it? Laura
made a few phone calls.” Lesley turned a low paying client into a bigger client and friend. “She hired me to re-write some of her web content. I ended up fixing her computer, helping her choose a laptop, and moving her web site to a new host. I’m planning on flying out early next year to meet her in real life for the first time.” It’s always important to have the choice. It can be great for business when you choose to go above and beyond but if you feel manipulated into doing extra work, it can leave a nasty aftertaste. “I was on call 24/7,” says Lesley about her old job. “While I was happy to be called up for serious things, I got one 2am call from someone whose mouse had stopped working.” Like most bad situations, the changes were gradual. When she started working there, Lesley says, “The culture was very positive. I put in a lot of effort in the junior role because I enjoyed the job.” To her delight, this led to her being promoted. “I’m very passionate about that kind of technology, so I didn’t even see it as a job. I felt like I was being paid to do something I’d willingly do for free.” Unfortunately, things went from great to ridiculous in just a few months. Lesley says, “I’d be given only part of the information I needed to do the job and I constantly felt undermined by the head office. On the one hand they refused to give me access to their policies / naming conventions / standards and on the other they complained if I didn’t follow them.” On one occasion, when told about a big project with only 24 hours to go (when they’d known about it for two weeks), Lesley says, “I stupidly
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crunched all day (no breaks, no lunch). I did overtime that night to make sure everything was set up and working. I even had to assemble the furniture and carry the monitors over to the desks myself. “I worked an entire weekend without sleep and then had one of the managers yell at me for wanting to go home and rest once I’d briefed everyone on what happened. I gave my employer a lot of slack because they were just starting out. Things can be chaotic but they expected crunch-level work all the time and refused to give me any concessions in return.” Some signs that might warn you to steer clear are: • You get the sense that they don’t value your time or expertise • Your gut instinct screams “Are they kidding?” • Your heart sinks when you hear from them • You don’t feel they pay you enough/promptly Doing more will leave you feeling resentful (even if you manage to not say something, it will come out somehow) But it’s good to be helpful when • The solution to a client or customer’s problem seems simple to you and you want to share it • They’re a pleasure to work with Giving extra won’t leave you feeling depleted in any way - you’re giving from a place of fullness For more advice, please visit www.applecoaching.com and www.evemenezescunningham.co.uk
y h t l a e h t e G . . . y p p a h d an
Available at all good bookshops
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August 2009
the nlp conference 13,14 & 15 November 2009, London
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15/6/09 16:52:03
CELEBRITY
The Barefoot Doctor
Ancient wisdom for current concerns Stephen Russell, better known as The Barefoot Doctor, wasn’t always known for his sense of calm. The 54-year-old author of several books including Pure says, “I was a real little tearaway at school. Always getting into scraps.” By Eve Menezes Cunningham
Keep your eyes open for opportunities – whenever there is great movement, whether towards boom or bust, there are more opportunities
S
tephen started studying Aikido when he was 11. All his classmates were adults but they influenced him positively. “They were all interested in healing and channelling energy for healing. I learned to meditate and started doing some yoga. My yoga teacher was close friends with R D Laing, an amazing counter-culture psychotherapist,” says Stephen. “He talked about accommodating your own madness before thinking about others’. I spent three years studying psychotherapy with RD Laing. And from Aikido, I went to Tai Chi. I got interested in Taoism in general, Chinese medicine and acupuncture. I trained as a doctor in Chinese Medicine.” Stephen spent time travelling and studying. He learned about Shamanism while living with Native Americans in New Mexico for four years and kept looking for ways to apply what he was learning to the world he knew here. Since 1983, Stephen’s focus has been on helping stressed, busy people fit some ancient wisdom and relaxation into their heavily scheduled lives. Because he’d come from a musical family, he decided to use music and visuals to make the information more entertaining. Drumming was an important part of this. He started calling himself the Barefoot Doctor because he says he used to work barefoot: “Otherwise you’re getting sweaty feet in your trainers. It’s humbling yourself in front of the patient, too. Barefoot doctors in China were mostly women. They’d travel around the country and give acupuncture and healing, making people’s lives more comfortable and enjoyable. I had all the credentials to call myself a Barefoot Doctor.” Stephen continued to add to his toolkit. This included NLP and he became friends with Paul McKenna. “It’s not the technique, it’s more about the person practising it, expressing it,” he says. “I was presenting something ancient and profound in a modern idiom. It had to be in a light-hearted enough way to appeal to short attention spans. This was the challenge. As an artist, I was developing all areas. My craftsmanship was increasing.” He says his time with Laing taught him “to be aware of how everything’s connected rather than separated. So watching someone do EFT I think, ‘OK, they’ve taken that from Chinese medicine’.” As he looks back, he says, “I wish I’d known how to relax but then I wouldn’t have gone on this path to learn it. It’s been so exciting.”
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SPECIAL READER OFFER: For one month, Stephen is offering his eight week online training course in the Principles of Personal Power for just £187 (normal price £307). This course is delivered in a series of 48 films and is backed up by text and audio. Visit www.schoolforwarriors.com for more information (and mention Rapport magazine when signing up).
CELEBRITY
The Barefoot Doctor’s School for Warriors The Barefoot Doctor recently launched his School for Warriors. He says, “Unless you’re incredibly temporarily powerful, you can’t change the course of the economic flow externally. It’s traditional to work on yourself as your primary focus every day. The more you train, meditate and exercise, the less concerned you get with the ups and downs of fortune. You take things as challenge to your metal as a Warrior. “The School for Warriors teaches you to train harder, to situate yourself properly within your body, meditate, breath properly, relax your body, situate your mind properly within your skull, increase your mental focus and confidence. You learn to trust yourself more as you go into battle everyday.”
The Barefoot Doctor’s prescription for surviving the current economic situation
The way he explains it, it sounds like the NLP choice of being at cause rather than effect. Stephen says, “The warrior learns how to master battle with oneself. There’s balance and disharmony and the warrior is always working on mastering that swing. To remain centred at all times. It’s about personal ethics, being decent, respectful, generous and helpful to other people. Warriors are willing to take command rather than seeing themselves as a victim: ‘OK, I’m here on the planet with all my brothers and sisters rather than just looking out for myself’. There’s a sense of responsibility to the rest of human race.”
Stephen says, “The UK economy has been running on air and the two most recent booms have been sustained artificially beyond their natural spans. Since the last recession, the world economy has become fully globalised so no one territory is untouched. No market exists to take up the slack. On the plus side, because it’s globalised, the collective effort to reignite the cashflow will eventually have an equivalent impact on the upturn. “Personally, I trained myself out of borrowing two recessions back so am not overly exposed. Being peripatetic in my sphere of action, I have my bets more spread. Though concerned about how deeply this contraction will bite in terms of potential for mass unemployment and the knock-on domino effects on a global level, I am, so far, fairly optimistic and confident we’ll pull out of it and into a new more sensible, sustainable way of operating. “In many ways, I feel it’s nature’s method of getting us to stop consuming so much. Her way, perhaps, of saving us from immanent extinction by preserving the rapidly dwindling vital resources a while longer, thus affording us the chance to develop the requisite alternative technologies and energy sources. “Reduce all overheads to the minimum. Eschew emotional spending and only allow yourself one small treat a week. Be willing to let go of everything and always trust that whatever’s happening is meant to be and will lead to something better if you trust it. Use it as an opportunity for living a totally different life. “Attune more to your relationship with the underlying mystery
and its driving force (the Tao/the spirit/the ineffable). This produces magical results regardless of external circumstances. Be open to connecting with others on a more profound and meaningful level. Use it as an opportunity to learn about love. Recessions reduce vanity levels considerably and so offer a perfect opportunity to explore what really counts - sharing the love. ”Instead of investing the majority of energy and cash in external diversions, invest in self-development. Learn a martial art, make your body and mind strong, develop the capacity for holding your nerve and generally train yourself into a superhuman state. And keep your eyes open for opportunities. Whenever there is great movement, whether towards boom or bust, there are more opportunities. It’s only when things are relatively settled that the opportunities diminish. Remain positive, optimistic and cheerful in other words, rather than succumbing to recession-malaise.”
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COACHING
Coaching at Southern Railway A Partnership Story with Buonacorsi On June 9th Southern Railway were thrilled to find out that they had re-won their franchise for the next five years! This article takes you through the story of one of the factors that Southern Executives believe contributed to this success - an investment in a coaching style of leadership. By Gill How
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n December 2007, Southern Railway in partnership with coaching provider Buonacorsi Consulting won a National Training Award from the UK Skills Council for their coaching programme - linking investment in a coaching style of leadership with business results. In 2008 a significant statistical link was shown between effective employee engagement and the managers who had attended the coaching programme. In 2009 Southern is delivering the coaching programme using its own resources, and is developing an internal coaching service supported by Buonacorsi. To date this has been a four year journey of transforming from the historic British Rail “command and control” management style to a facilitative and coaching style of leadership. How has this been achieved and what did Southern and Buonacorsi gain and learn? Let’s start at the beginning. Who are the players and how did this story start? Southern Railway is a train operating company employing approximately 4,200 staff and operates train services between London and Brighton, along the Sussex coast and within the south London metro area. Buonacorsi, which means “good travelling companion”, is a coaching and change management supplier, led by Gill How. Buonacorsi works in partnership with client organisations to create and deliver solutions which enable people and transform results. Following the start of its six year franchise in 2003, Southern embarked on an investment programme costing around one billion pounds which resulted in a new fleet of trains, refurbishment of its train maintenance depots and stations, and substantial investment in customer service training. To build on this, the then Managing Director, Charles Horton, sponsored a training programme to
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invest in the leadership capability of senior managers, to equip them with skills and knowledge necessary to move the organisation forward. With Buonacorsi he then identified that coaching could help managers build the bridge between the leadership training and implementation of the associated learning in their day to day work. The initial application of the coaching was to help managers develop
they needed to be having with their team members and own managers as they moved forward. The idea developed to equip managers with the coaching skills themselves which would also enable Southern to create a sustainable solution. After a number of training experiments and research into options, a commitment was made to offer a coaching qualification to a pilot of 18 senior managers from a range of disciplines in the organisation. The then Operations Director, Chris Burchell, was asked to be sponsor of the pilot, and was a participant too. Half way through he was promoted to Managing Director as Charles moved on, and his commitment to the coaching programme fortunately remained intact! So what exactly is the coaching programme? It is a bespoke design, delivered over an eight month period, culminating in a Level 5 coaching qualification from the Institute of Leadership and Management (ILM). This choice gave Southern and Buonacorsi the flexibility to deliver the curriculum in line with the learning style of the managers, complemented by the rigour of an external qualification. To gain their coaching practice, managers coached colleagues from other areas of the business, to resist the temptation of offering too much advice! For the managers, the outcomes from the coaching were thrilling, a tangible example being a coachee gaining confidence to apply for a promotion and being successful! For the Head of Leadership and Behavioural Development (L&BD), Zoey Hudson, there were a number of additional benefits, such
The idea developed to equip managers with the coaching skills themselves which would also enable Southern to create a sustainable solution a positive appreciation of their 360 degree feedback, and to set goals to enable them to move forward with their own development. What we learnt from this initial investment in coaching was that Southern managers really liked it. It helped them to take ownership of their own development, and gave them the confidence to tackle all the conversations
COACHING
as coaching skills becoming an integral part of how performance and development conversations are held in the organisation. For the HR Director, Matt Watson, the coaching programme became a critical component of the overall HR “Cycle to Success” strategy - again the bridge between knowledge and implementation, theory and action. The business case to fund the second programme was a challenge. Enthusiasm and anecdotal evidence were not initially enough to get the programme approved by the Southern board. Fortunately, by then links with the programme and improvements in business measures were beginning to come through and there was acknowledgement of the contribution made by coaching. Seven Southern Executive Group members have now attended and sponsored programmes. This is one measure of the level of commitment to the programme, with a total of approximately 80 managers now having been through or currently attending the fourth programme. Let’s recap - why is Southern investing in this way? Two main reasons - the first is to develop a coaching style of leadership which now clearly demonstrates an improvement in employee engagement which in turn improves customer satisfaction. The second is to create an internal coaching service that offers developmental coaching to all members of staff. How do we manage the evolution of the service? We now have a Coaching Steering Group, comprising representatives from Operations, Engineering and Commercial areas of the business as well as HR and Buonacorsi. What are the results from the investment? These are things that have happened over the last four years, where
Southern management believe a coaching approach has contributed to the success: • Best train service performance ever on the network • Best Train reliability ever • Best Customer Service survey results ever • Staff customer service measures improving • Staff Turnover reduced by 30% • Absence reduced & among the best in the Industry • Grievances, disciplinaries & tribunals reduced • Staff engagement results improving • National Training Award for Coaching Programme • Maintenance Team of the Year, National Railway Awards • Staff Assaults at lowest level ever • Winning and smooth integration of Gatwick Express brand These results are very impressive, and certainly ones to be proud of. However, what they do not convey is the personal change and development it has meant for so many Southern managers. Here are some examples of what managers who have attended the programme say: “For me the coaching journey has been about discovering that you can be a far more effective leader if you develop your coaching skills. Learning to be a powerful listener instead of a ‘good talker’ – learning to ask the right questions makes it easier to get more from people.” Selhurst Train Care Depot Manager. “The programme was my journey of selfawareness. It made me realise that I did not actually listen to my staff enough and that my values of “say it as it is” and “up front” views came across as aggressive or ignorant. I am looking forward to the future with coaching and I can’t see managing people in any other way”. Revenue Manager, West Croydon. “This isn’t just about coaching, it completely changes the way I think about talking to people.” Financial Controller, Southern Head Office. “Most of my working life in the armed forces, prison service and on the railway has
involved discipline without asking why. Since completing the course, I now use coaching as a tool to encourage staff to see how they can make changes to avoid potential disciplinary issues. It helps me tremendously to bring out the potential in my staff.” Conductor Manager, Brighton. Chris Burchell recently said: “Southern continues to be a very successful business, consistently delivering the high standards of service our passengers deserve and have come to expect. I think an element of this is definitely attributable to our focus on developing the leadership and management style. I see the coaching program as a key part of developing our business. It has fundamentally changed and shaped my behavioural approach to work.” What has it meant for Buonacorsi as the coaching partner in this journey? It has been an amazing experience. The factors that single the experience out are really very simple. They relate to: • The quality and commitment of the leadership and sponsorship from the Southern’s Managing Director and other Exec members • The quality of the working partnership with HR and L&BD • Our ground rules about transparency and learning together • The fundamental belief of the value of coaching as a tool to allow people to offer their potential. Buonacorsi has found it an immensely satisfying professional experience to work in partnership with Southern, a fabulous opportunity to create something tangible together, delivering worthwhile outcomes we can be proud of at every level. And best of all, it’s by no means the end of the story, with challenges to consolidate, embed and make this better still, in time still to come. Gill How, Buonacorsi Consulting www.buonacorsi.co.uk www.SouthernRailway.com
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HEALTH
MY LEFT BREAST Rosie O’Hara celebrates life after cancer By Caitlin Collins
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n January of this year Rosie O’Hara was diagnosed with cancer in the left breast. Her story of what happened next is a testimony to extraordinary courage, resilience and ability to reframe crisis as opportunity. NLP Trainer Rosie is a busy woman. ‘I started this year with other things in mind,’ she says. ‘I’d had a mammogram before Christmas and then went on holiday. I came back to a letter recalling me for another mammogram. I knew there was a lump, but my mum had had a cyst, and I thought that’s all it was.’ Taking charge Right away Rosie took charge of what was going on. ‘The first appointment I was offered was on my daughter’s birthday. So I said “No” to that appointment and went in two days later. My daughter came with me - I always took someone with me to all my appointments.’ Doctors gave Rosie the choice between either a lumpectomy and radiotherapy, or a total mastectomy. ‘I dislike any form of conventional medicine and I really wanted to avoid radiotherapy, so I opted for the mastectomy; this was my informed and considered choice,’ she explains. Rosie met with a challenge in reassuring her partner, Jim. ‘When he got upset I had to
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understand that it was about him - both his former wives had died from cancer. I had to tell him that I’m Rosie and I’m going to live. This wasn’t easy. I was upset, angry, annoyed. My goals for 2009 had been seriously sideswiped! Through my tears, I pulled myself up (literally - I was leaning on the kitchen table!) and presented my new plan for the immediate future, enlisting Jim’s support by telling him in a way that he would understand that I had a plan to live.’ Positive thinking Rosie was determined to avoid all negative language about the cancer. ‘I removed words like “struggle”, “battle”, and “difficult” from my vocabulary and from the vocabularies of everyone else around me; and, sadly, where that wasn’t possible, I temporarily removed myself from those people.’ With the operation scheduled for February 26th, Rosie set about creating a compelling purpose for her future. ‘I intended, first, to be out of hospital on March 2nd; second, to attend a choir practice on March 12th; and third, to give a presentation on “Creating a Compelling Purpose” at a dinner in Aberdeen on March 19th to which I had agreed before the diagnosis. I created my
own compelling purposes properly, seeing what I wanted in glorious technicolour, hearing it in surround sound, and feeling it in every cell of my body. And I did it. I got out of hospital on March 1st, largely because I had no pain relief after the op. How did I deal with the pain instead? I lay on the bed, breathed into the surgical site (I hadn’t seen it then, but the surgeon had told me the scar was a smiley face), and slowly relaxed bit by bit from the toes to the head while telling myself that the cancer had gone. I think another part of the reason why I was sent home early was because I was so disgustingly cheerful - such behaviour doesn’t fit in a hospital!’ Having demonstrated flexibility over her second purpose, the choir practice ‘I was offered the chance to see the comedian Rhona Cameron instead, and chose laughing over singing!’ - Rosie made her presentation to 70 people. ‘I wore my new red jacket, with a new hairdo, and was supported by my chauffeur – my partner Jim, who was driving! It was all exactly as I had created in my mind.’ Looking back over the entire period following the diagnosis, Rosie can identify several other ways in which she brought her NLP skills to her aid.
HEALTH
What we usually hear about with cancer is all the negative stuff. People don’t often talk about the positive aspects Andrew Gransden Photography, Buckie
Creative visualisation Rosie describes a visualisation she created. ‘During the run up to the op, I spent part of each day lying down, relaxing, visualising a white light with gold edges encircling my breast and keeping it safe. And I imagined a little bee called Brenda busily wrapping up the cancer and keeping it away from the rest of my body. I still visualise the white light with gold edges, knowing that white light is keeping me safe.’ Changing her perspective was also helpful, distancing herself by taking the ‘3rd position’ of an observer. ‘Rapport was sometimes not so good in the hospital. One nurse leaned so far into my space that, as my daughter remarked, had she sneezed my head would have gone through the back of my chair! So I distanced myself, imagining I was a fly on the wall, and thinking, well, that’s how they understand the world, and it’s not about me.
Taking 3rd position also helped me to deal with conversations in a way that wasn’t either “transmit or receive” (as an ex-RAF student of mine puts it), which freed me from my emotions.’ Presuppositions Many of the NLP presuppositions came into play. ‘In addition to remembering that “we all have our own maps of the world”, so the doctors and nurses didn’t necessarily see things in the same way I did, I reminded myself that “all behaviour has a positive intention underlying it” and “people are doing the best they can at the time”, which helped me to understand not only where the medical staff were coming from but also the responses of friends and family. The one that says “we already have all the resources we need, or are able to create them” helped me to be in a
good state for the operation and for medical procedures I would tend to dislike, such as having needles inserted. Then reminding myself that “the mind and body are one system” encouraged me to take care of what was going in my mind in order to promote healing in my body.’ Rosie also created her own circle of excellence. ‘This is a great way to create a good state that you can take anywhere. I put one on the bed as I was wheeled into theatre, wrapped around me like a blanket.’ Changing personal history Among the most powerful NLP processes for Rosie during this time was the ‘change personal history’ process. ‘I had come across the work of an American cancer doctor called W Douglas Brodie, who had identified particular
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HEALTH
Part of the reason why I was sent home early was because I was so disgustingly cheerful – such behaviour doesn’t fit in a hospital!
personality traits in people with cancer; he had also noticed how particular types of unresolved trauma and emotional shocks correlated with specific sites of cancer. What he was saying seemed relevant to me. A family crisis that occurred several years ago jumped out at me as being not fully resolved: I had found it enormously stressful at the time and was still carrying a lot of guilt about it as well as the persistent need to know what had happened; in fact I had not been able to sleep through the night since then. About a week after I was diagnosed with cancer, I woke up knowing I had to address this. So I did a change personal history process there and then - since which I’ve been able to sleep properly again!’ Rosie’s Change Personal History Process • Deciding to do the process with the help of a timeline, I imagined my past as a line going out behind me. • I recalled the feelings associated with the incident, and anchored them by touching my shoulder. • Holding my shoulder, I went back along the timeline to the time of the incident. • Stepping off the timeline to an observer position, I took my hand off my shoulder and gathered the resources that were available to me now, in the present, such as my daughter, friends, and my NLP skills, and I reminded myself of the ways I help others and facilitate others in doing wonderful things. • Holding on to those resources, I stepped back on the timeline on the day before the incident occurred, when things were still OK. • Still holding my resources, I walked along the timeline, through the incident and on up to the present moment. • Standing at the present moment, I looked to the future, happy and cancer-free. I felt in my solar plexus area all the resources I had brought with me along the timeline, and noticed them radiating around me and out into my future. • I floated back over the timeline to look down dispassionately at that period in my life. I don’t know what happened and I no longer feel the need to know. I no longer feel that it was my fault, and no longer have any remorse or panic or anger about it. I’m happy to move forward. Future planning So what does the future look like now for Rosie? ‘Well, once I was out of hospital I immediately started setting more goals. I booked a holiday to Egypt in April. I started on my new book, “My Left Breast”. I intend to be 1½ stones lighter by August 18th. And I intend to honour all this year’s work commitments while remaining open to work coming in for
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First Photographic, Kintore
exciting new untapped areas.’ Rosie has met with her surgeon for the histology report. ‘The lymph glands are clear, as I knew they would be. Brenda the bee has been helping here. Curiously, my surgeon said that on removal the cancer was smaller than expected. I wonder slightly, if I had continued with the visualisation, would it have shrunk and disappeared completely? I will never know that; I’m just happy with the result I was given. After all, I can now say that I had cancer. I’m not having any further treatment. As we were discussing the possibility of my taking medication, I noticed that my surgeon and I weren’t listening to each other. I don’t want medication: the only thing he could offer me had only a 2% provable success rate in preventing further cancer, so why would I want to take it? I’m going to continue visualising, positive thinking, and also eating well: no red meat, very little wheat, no sugar, and no processed foods. I’ll just have some regular check ups, first at six months and then annually. And now I’m busy resting and thinking positively about my future. I want to be there for my grandsons and their mum, and for my partner, and also for the people I can inspire and enable with NLP.’ Rosie chose not to have reconstructive surgery – but she did have a model breast made, of a different kind. ‘I wanted to keep some memory
of my left breast, and it occurred to me that it’s possible to make plaster casts of parts of the body, which can then be cast in bronze. So I found someone on the internet who could tell me how to do it, and then, with the help of a friend, we did it. Seeing it lying on the kitchen table I found it easier to separate myself and say goodbye to it. And then Jim surprised me by saying we should hang the finished bronze on the wall - so that’s where it is now!’ And the book, “My Left Breast.” ‘Well, what we usually hear about with cancer is all the negative stuff. People don’t often talk about the positive aspects. And young women tend to think it won’t happen to them. While I was in hospital I was writing about my experience on Facebook; it prompted lots of responses. Reframing what some might perceive as a catastrophe is something I’ve always been able to do. And knowing that a solution for me affects others gives me something larger to live for; it’s about more than just me. So the book is about sharing what I’ve learned with others.’ She ends with a typically irrepressible remark: ‘I love the etymology of the word Amazon - it means “without a breast”. So now I’m a warrior woman without a breast!’ Rosie O’Hara lives and works in Scotland: www.nlphighland.com
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Call 0113 391 9595 (Mon – Fri, 8.30am – 5.30pm) Or visit www.towergateprofessionalrisks.co.uk *This is an indicative premium based on a sole practitioner with a turnover below £50,000 Towergate Professional Risks is a trading name of Towergate Underwriting Group Limited Registered Office: Towergate House, Eclipse Park, Sittingbourne Road, Maidstone, Kent ME14 3EN. Authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority
NLP
Belief Audit Process By Robert Smith, Sali Mustafic and Liz Bailey of the Treacle Training Research Group
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ur belief is that you can be, do, or have anything (including nothing if you choose). So what stops you realising your dreams? The answer is nothing real: just your own unique belief system and as Henry Ford said. “If you believe you can or you believe you can’t, which ever you think, you are right.” In NLP we speak of limiting and empowering beliefs so if we clean up the limiting and plump up the empowering ones does this do the trick? Well, we think that even this is not enough because we have been programmed with some really subtle and deep beliefs about our beliefs that take some expert digging to find. We suggest that what is required is a comprehensive belief audit. The aim of the belief audit is to discover the beliefs, or parts of beliefs, that are not in line with your true purpose that need updating so that they can be changed. While NLP offers us the tools to do the job the art lies in discovering the beliefs that are not in your consciousness. The deeper they are buried the more we need to dig to find what needs to change. What is a belief ? Beliefs are thoughts we keep, consciously or unconsciously, and they make our judgements and evaluations about life. Our beliefs are the on/off switches for good and bad, right or wrong and yes or no. Stated simply - if any situation fits our beliefs then we feel good. If it doesn’t fit then the incongruence makes us feel bad. This is hard wired into the limbic system, the primitive part of the brain, and developed as a clear indicator of a threat to our programmed status quo. A belief system is a synergistic collection of beliefs linked to our
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value system and answering the question “Why?” And the reason we need the question “Why?” is because humans are meaning making machines. Like any system it needs maintenance. To begin the process we question our conscious empowering beliefs, are they as empowering as we believe them to be? Next we address our conscious limiting beliefs and then we unearth, review and possibly update the unconscious beliefs that underlie them. This is the essence of a belief audit. It is fabulously simple. The only problem is that if, in some way, just one belief feels that it is under threat, and this only needs to be a 0.001% element, then you can never be, do or have what you really want. Ironically we can know, at a logical level, that something is benign but if our belief system perceives it to be a threat then we respond as if that were true. You feel uncomfortable. You feel demotivated. You feel off course. This is a sure sign that you need a belief audit. The belief audit identifies archetypal beliefs in each of the three categories; empowering, limiting and unconscious. Empowering, we’ve discovered, sometimes isn’t all it says on the tin. “Everybody has some good in them” was one empowering belief that Claudette suggested. On further examination she discovered that as a belief there had been times when she had been too trusting of others and that updating this belief to “Everybody has good in them and be careful, everybody also has some bad in them” was in fact more empowering for her. Future pacing her life with this new updated version of her empowering belief she felt that she was going to be much more in control of her destiny.
NLP
It is the conscious limiting belief that we are most familiar with. “I’m too fat”, “I’m too tall”, “I’m not quick enough”, I’m not clever enough”, “I’m not...”, “I’m not...”, “I’m not...”, “They won’t let me”, “They won’t like me”... “I can’t spiel.” Now we come to the gustatory (meaty) bit, the unconscious beliefs which we have subdivided into three groups Somatic, Insidious and Misinterpreted beliefs. Each can be encountered at varying degrees of consciousness. Somatic beliefs are the most deeply unconscious... Somatic beliefs are beliefs held in the physical body. They are held there because they were taken on non-verbally at a very early or extremely vulnerable point in your life. A belief held here “goes without saying”. It goes without saying because you don’t have words to explain it. It was formed without words. Somatic beliefs are in the muscle. We exercise and nourish them, without knowing them, by feeling, sensing and acting upon them without question. Take the man; we will call him Andrew, who acts as though “There will never be enough”. Questioning Andrew revealed that he felt that his mother never fed him. Later Andrew checked this out with his mother and found that it was true that she had had insufficient milk to breastfeed him. And so it is true that for the first few months of his life he was literally starving. Andrew continually hungered for more and believed that satisfaction was unattainable. His body learned this before he had the language to
consider it. It was carried in his unconscious, pre-language, constantly driving him to seek for more. However much he gathered for himself and his family, he could never relax; never feel comfortable because “there will never be enough” informed his thoughts, feelings and actions at every neurological level. Andrew did not know that he believed this but his body did. Strangely by all social measures Andrew would be considered a very successful man. He had a family, a home and was very wealthy but he was desperately unhappy and didn’t know why. So many people are looking to start a family, have a lovely home and enjoy great wealth. Andrew discovered that only one thing matters, being happy now. Insidious beliefs are introduced, often with good intentions, by family, friends, or the culture in which we have grown, right up to this moment of discovery. This type of belief can sound caring, supportive and even empowering while carrying a hidden message (often a somatic belief of the person who introduced it) the purpose of which is to control the person or to make them happy regardless. Bev‘s family belief was “Better to be lucky than rich” which at first glance, sounds supportive and empowering. Bev was conscious of saying it but unaware of the embedded unconscious message. She had developed an insidious part of the belief which was that you cannot be
Our beliefs are the on/off switches for good and bad, right or wrong and yes or no
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NLP
lucky and have money. On reflection Bev actually thought it was a bit more of a family story of why her father had never worked and spent most of his time down the betting office. Bev worked hard, deemed herself lucky but could never understand why money constantly slipped through her fingers. Going through the belief audit process she updated the belief to, “It is better to be lucky and rich”. You could spend a lifetime with insidious beliefs and not realise just how much they are controlling your behaviour. The advice “Be careful what you ask for…” applies particularly to a group of beliefs that we have named Misinterpreted beliefs. Misinterpretation can cause a belief to be developed in quite a different way from the original intention. This can happen when the surface structure of a belief is ambiguous belying the intention of the deep structure. Robert tells the story of his mother passing on her belief that “You can’t beat the Bookie” which he interpreted (or, from his mother’s point of view misinterpreted) by becoming the Bookie and successfully running a book at school, leaving with no A levels and three (some might say colourful) years wasted. The ramification later in life of having no qualifications he puts down to “Being a smartass” and to not trying because of the belief that you can’t beat the system. This is a rebellious misinterpretation as is often demonstrated by teenagers. The other way a belief can be misinterpreted is unconsciously. Consider the belief “You’re only young once”. This advice was given to Alice many times during her childhood. She remembers it as ‘a family mantra’ and agrees that it was probably intended to mean “Enjoy life”. During a belief audit Alice came to see that some part of her had interpreted it differently. As a result she felt that had not been allowing herself to grow up. Alice defined her own misinterpretation: • “You’re only young once”. • “You’re” meant Alice specifically • “only” made this is a limiting belief • “young” implied that time was slipping away, it is being young that is desirable, therefore she must remain young • “once” there wasn’t going to be another chance, she felt she must ensure that she never allowed ageing to begin. This belief, this part in her unconscious, had been dominating her reality and preventing her growing into adulthood both physically and emotionally. Alice, now in her thirties suffers anorexia. She had been eating only boiled sweets preventing her body developing into that of a woman. She has a responsible,
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well paid, job but lives at home with her parents, still occupying her childhood bedroom with its pastel wallpaper, dolls and soft toys. She feels that “Real life had never started”. Once Alice had understood this she rapidly came across many misinterpreted beliefs and began the process of updating them. These misinterpreted beliefs only came to the surface after she had worked through her empowering beliefs and her limiting beliefs. In the light of this work it became necessary to revisit and in some cases update her empowering beliefs. “It’s great that I still look young” had taken on a new meaning. There is a definite and designed process to the belief audit. It is a spiral of identifying beliefs peeling them back, checking them, and aligning them so that you can be, do and have whatever you want and you might even find a new purpose to your life. www.Treaclenlptraining.co.uk
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NLP
New Code NLP The modern approach to NLP An article by Michael Carroll
T
he field of NLP is moving forward in an exciting new direction. A group of collaborators working under the mentorship of the John Grinder team are creating and developing new processes that fall into the genre of New Code NLP. NLP was originally coded using the underlying principles of early computers, hence the name ‘programming’. Imagine if we all insisted on using computers developed in the 1970s. While that may sound crazy, many in NLP are following that logic in sticking with the NLP of the 1970s. Yes, the Classic Code of NLP is great; it paved the way for the new developments. If you want the latest and most powerful change processes, take a look at the New Code of NLP. The background of New Code NLP New Code NLP is set of NLP tools and techniques developed by John Grinder initially with Judith Delozier, and then Carmen Bostic St Clair. In recent years other collaborators have joined John and Carmen to form a development team. When creating the New Code, Grinder originally sought to correct what he perceived to be coding flaws in the classic code. Another outcome was to create fast and effective change processes for working with clients. John was also concerned at the lack of personal congruency in NLP Practitioners, that is people well trained in NLP were stunningly effective at helping their clients experience miraculous change yet their own lives were in a mess. Self-application of New Code patterns is an essential part of training for New Code NLP Practitioners. New Code is continually developing When I came across the New Code and professionally hooked up with John and Carmen in 2002, I was instantly impressed by how easy it was to deploy these highly effective New Code NLP patterns. In my usual style, I continually tested the patterns to find their limits. As yet, the limits are few. I started merging components of different techniques and adding bits to see what happened. Then I started to create my own New Code processes, some of which John and Carmen began integrating into their trainings. I worked at increasing the profile of New Code NLP and with John and Carmen taught New Code NLP Practitioner and Trainers courses. We began attracting a lot of bright minds to the courses, who in turn also developed new techniques which are shared between the New Code Trainers. Before I knew it a team of developers were emerging, and lots of new patterns were being created. So while the New Code began its life back in the 1980s when one NLP co-creator wanted to continue it’s development, it is constantly being updated with new developments to stay current. What’s more we really do want the new generation in NLP to be contributors to the field and work with us on creating new patterns Personal congruency Earlier in this article I mentioned personal congruency. In NLP we say congruency is when the conscious and unconscious minds are in alignment. One part of developing personal congruency is establishing a clear signal between the conscious and unconscious mind. The first
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place a signal system appeared in NLP was in the old version of the six-step reframe. The utilisation of an involuntary signal in the six-step reframe was a breakthrough in NLP. An internal signal that a client has no conscious control over is elicited and tested as part of the intervention. The unconscious finds new choices that match the intention of the original behaviour (but creates more choice) without the conscious being aware of what had been selected. The unconscious communicates through the signals when it has found the new choices and the client is only aware of the change when next in the context of the issue. The ecology and thus congruency is at the unconscious level. Without the congruency of a clear signal system the pattern is ineffective. The notion of unconscious selection of resources flows through the New Code. High Performance states In the New Code of NLP we usually work at the level of state to create new choices for clients (In the classic code, practitioners work at the level of behaviour). This is because state includes multiples of behaviours, some of which the client does not even have access to when consciously thinking about the new choices he wants in areas of his life. A highly effective way of accessing a high performance state is through a ‘New Code Game’. A New Code game includes the variables of utilising all three major representational systems, cross-lateralised movements to fully engage both hemispheres of the brain and scalability making the tasks more complex. The interaction of these variables produce a ‘high performance state’ and the highest level which is a ‘know nothing state’. These states are then transferred to the context where the client wants more choice. A high performance state is when the client is performing without thinking. A ‘know nothing state’ is when a client is performing at very high level without any conscious awareness. In life threatening situations the unconscious gives us access to these states where amazing feats of human behaviour can occur to save ones life. The good news is you don’t have to have a life-threatening situation to perform at such a high level, you can do so learning the New Code. See page 37 for the steps for a New Code change format. Some of the well-known games are the Alphabet game, NASA game, various ball games and trampoline formats. For a copy of the Alphabet game and instructions you can email info@NLPacademy.co.uk
About the author Michael Carroll is the founder and course director of the NLP Academy and Co-founder with John Grinder and Carmen Bostic St Clair of the International Trainers Academy of NLP. He is the only NLP Master Trainer in the world certified by John Grinder and Carmen Bostic St Clair and he works closely with them in developing and delivering high quality NLP training.
NLP
THE NEW CODE CHANGE FORMAT
From observer position client observes context where new choices are wanted
1. Identify the context where the client wants
a difference in experience from 3rd position
2. Associate to context of where the change/
Observer Position
state is desired. (1st position), Fully access circuitry associated with the issue.
3. Separator state 4. Enter know nothing state, or high
High Performance State
performance state via game or some other means
Context
5. Coach manoeuvres client to the context
with neural pathways fully activated from high performance state
Player follows the coach’s guidance for the game. When in state the coach quickly shunts client to context space so high performance state gets transferred to VAK stimuli of issue
Player steps into context to activate VAK stimuli of issue
If you want the latest and most powerful change processes, take a look at the New Code of NLP STATE AS A DIGITAL AND ANALOGUE CONCEPT In the change New Code change format above there are two strong states. There is a ‘high performance state’ and a ‘context state’. There is also a separator state and the state in observer position. These states are marked out and utilised as digital entities by the coach. The intention is to push the high performance to the context of where the present state was located. The client will have access to the multiple choices inherent in the high performance state when he/she enters the real world context of the present state. There are several New Code processes where the coach will utilise state as an ‘analogue’ concept and work with the overlap of two states. This is particularly useful where clients’ experience situations where an unresourceful state absorbs them so quickly that they lose control as the state takes over their system. At the other end of the spectrum a state can also sneak up on someone so slowly that they are not aware what is happening until the state has engulfed them. The client didn’t
Everyday Context
realise the state was slowly building until it’s too late. In both of these cases you can work with the kinaesthetic ‘trigger point’ which happens way before that unresourceful state takes over. In the above diagram you can see the early part of where the unwanted state occurs below conscious threshold and there is a period when both states overlap. The coach sets up a situation where through being sensitive to the trigger point of the unwanted state new choices can be created before the state takes over. I have found working at trigger point is particularly useful in working with addictions and allergies. My colleague Carmen Bostic St Clair has developed and is developing formats in this area of NLP.
Trigger point of unwanted state Occurs way below threshold of conscious awareness
Unwanted State
The point where both states overlap
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BUSINESS INTERVIEW
NLP and Entrepreneurs! The Spirit of Enterprise What is an entrepreneur? Is he or she born, or created? Can NLP develop entrepreneurial characteristics? If so, then how? Award-winning entrepreneur and NLP trainer Kay Cooke debates these questions and more.
D
r. Deepak Chopra once quoted a study in which the researchers concluded that the average person thinks approximately 65,000 thoughts per day. They also went on to suggest that of these 65,000, about 95% are exactly the same thoughts that had passed through the minds of people the day before. Other studies show we think between 12,000 - 50,000 thoughts per day, and deep thinkers in excess of 70,000. Now whilst this is not a forum for scientific debate, it does raise a few questions in my mind about the correlation between quality, quantity and types of thinking. To illustrate this point with clients, I often use a bubble machine, asking them which (thought) bubbles they decide to pay attention to and which ones slip past their conscious awareness. I’ve been wondering about this year’s Sunday Times Rich List which revealed some notable entrepreneurial names had seen many millions wiped off their balance sheets. Their losses - mind-boggling to most - were hardly surprising considering the current
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economic climate, but how important do you think they were to the likes of Branson, Sugar and Abramovich? After all, a loss is a loss. Isn’t it? So what would they do if they lost it all? Money that is (if in fact money is ‘all’).
What exactly is an entrepreneur anyway? What must a person have done, achieved or earned to be given this title? And if you are a budding entrepreneur yourself, how will you know when you get there? I remember teaching ‘thinking skills’ several years ago, where we encouraged and developed enterprising and entrepreneurial ideas within some of the poorer parts of the North East. There was a bright young lad from Gateshead who, along with his dad, ran a profitable enterprise. He was about 17 at the time and immensely proud of his business acumen. He certainly could think around, out of, through and under any box. However, he did seem to have overlooked one small (but potentially huge) problem; the business activity was not legal! He nicked bikes whilst his Dad then cut in half, re-soldered and re-painted them. This provided the family with a profitable product to sell to a niche market with high margins and low overheads! It may be useful to apply our NLP heads for a moment and take a peek at the facets of that ‘map’ through the clues in their
BUSINESS INTERVIEW
activities. Indeed, what are the component parts of any enterprising strategy? It seems to me there has to be a precise and complete process transporting the momentum of an idea through to some form of valuable transaction. Perhaps it’s not all about making money. Many millionaires have declared it was the making of their first million that was actually the greatest thrill of all, perhaps suggesting it is the making of money, the process, the thrill of the chase that brings the true reward. When Sahar and Bobby Hashemi set out to raise money for their first branch of Coffee Republic, they faced closed door after closed door. In light of this experience, Sahar’s subsequent mantra to all would-be business start-ups is ‘never give up’. She and Bobby finally got their funding from a kindly bank manager at 4pm one Friday afternoon, for whatever reason. He was their 30th appointment. Sahar Hashemi is a model entrepreneur. She spotted an opportunity, asked herself ‘how’ and made it happen. Interestingly, she laments the moment her brand became too big - she lost control of her baby. However, recognising the business opportunities, she later sold the brand and left the business. It seems that for her at least, the process was complete. I often wonder about the NLP concepts of association and dissociation among entrepreneurs. Is it that entrepreneurial thinking is about being fully associated and making decisions based much more on instinct than fact? It may appear irrational and pigheaded for an entrepreneur to risk losing everything based on intuition, and yet that
What exactly is an entrepreneur anyway? What must a person have done, achieved or earned to be given this title? seems very much a part of the spirit. I remember one very successful entrepreneur hosting a lavish party a couple of decades ago and announcing to the group that he and his family would either be millionaires or paupers the very next day - it was a thrilling night of ‘what the hell!’ Perhaps this mindset knows intuitively, that it has the capacity to bounce back with an innate desire to win. Do entrepreneurial types literally view failure as valuable feedback? Because as we all know, feedback is the breakfast of champions. So is it possible to possess entrepreneurial spirit and not take risks? Well I believe so and many organisations recognise and reward ‘intrepreneurial’ thinking. However, I am pretty sure that most entrepreneurs are poor team players. Can NLP help to develop entrepreneurialism? Yes, undoubtedly. The first step is to tune up the modal operators of possibility and then embrace behavioural flexibility. My belief and experience is that we can teach and encourage entrepreneurial behaviours. However, innate entrepreneurs are
unlikely to want to do things according to someone else’s map; they will want to do it their way. NLP offers a process to de-clutter the mind and exorcise would-be saboteurs. We can liberate choices and decide which of those (thought) bubbles to pay attention to and which ones to ignore. NLP can enhance and develop versatility, drive, flexibility, tenacity, curiosity as entrepreneurial ways of thinking. Remember Apollo 11. It was no miracle that we went to the moon. Somebody just decided we should go and making this decision created a context for information to be gathered, understood and applied. NASA then had to distinguish between specific thinking and the general interest. “We are what we think. All that we are, arises from our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.” Buddha I’m an award-winning entrepreneur onto my fifth business and I’m a Leisure Enterprise graduate. Did the latter create the former? No, I don’t think so, and I’ve been single minded since I was a child and enterprising since I made my first Sindy doll costume. My own motivational strategy balances a drive away from feeling shackled and total focus on a vision. For me, it’s the process that matters far and above any outcome. The deal is always 100% or nothing. Entrepreneurial spirit might be described as dynamic; breathing life into all component parts of a defined whole whilst simultaneously exploring future possibilities, which bizarrely, sounds rather like the principles of NLP change-work!
EXPERTISE Award winning entrepreneur Kay Cooke is a business consultant, mind coach, industry and NLP trainer, specialist in: Marketing, Retail, Customer Service, HR, Training, Coaching, Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), NLP in Business, NLP in Education, Hypnosis, Negotiation, Mediation, Copywriting, Speaking, Entrepreneurial Thinking, and Accelerated Learning Principles. She is a partner in The Managing Excellence (ME) Group alongside former Nissan executive David Cooke. They have offices in Northumberland and London. David works internationally as a consultant to the automotive and manufacturing industries. He specialises in Lean processes and interim management and is a NLP Master Practitioner. To find out more, see www.the-me-group.com email info@the-me-group.com or tel 05602 728 815
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RESEARCH
Confessions of a University Lecturer NLP in Education
By Diane Hardiman
M
y challenge - to present a short article describing the ways in which NLP helps me as a lecturer; how it can help others who teach and how it can help the students. Putting pen to paper I soon realised that the remit was huge, so I decided to present just a few of the multitudinous aspects, briefly. Here goes..... Confessions of a University Lecturer I clearly recall the day I confessed, over lunch to my University colleagues that I was a Master Practitioner of NLP and that I utilized NLP within my teaching practice. All conversation stopped, all eyes turned to me, and several fear-filled jaws flapped, for a short while, with silent reproach. A response I am sure some of you will recognise from your own ‘confessions’. When the dam of silence finally broke, it was with a flood of exclamations and accusations such as “You use NLP...” and “...NLP... that’s no better than brain washing...” and “...NLPeeeee....!?” it was akin to being drowned under a deluge of ‘Lady Bracknell’s’, however instead of “...a handbag!...” being the offensive term it was “NLP.” Fortunately, I am a strong swimmer and that incident propelled my determination to continue incorporating NLP techniques into my teaching, and convinced me that my colleagues needed to ‘dip a toe’ into the warm waters of NLP and experiment in the lecture theatre.
Prior to my NLP training I was using various aspects of NLP, albeit unconsciously thus not very efficiently, in my teaching practice. I was aware for example: • that students have different ‘Learning styles’ equating to Representational Systems and Predicates in NLP • I worked on ‘Establishing a relationship’ = Rapport in NLP • I responded to student progress via the ‘Feedback sandwich’ = Not Failure, Simply Feedback in NLP. Post NLP training, I began to teach with more confidence. It had confirmed and validated my existing teaching style and extended my training skills repertoire. Quickly I discovered that NLP is everywhere in teaching; we use different terminology for the same, or very similar, processes. Hence ‘Words and Meaning’, the awareness that words can and do carry different meanings and connotations to different people, is highly significant. This is very important in counselling as misunderstanding a client can wreak havoc in the therapeutic process. So enough preamble...what do I do? Let me set the scene. My student lecture groups vary widely in size, from one-to-one to 100 students. They range in age from mid 20’s to approaching retirement. They span educational experiences, from those already with a degree to those who left school at 15 without qualifications, and an array of career backgrounds from members of the armed forces to bus drivers to complementary therapists to post doctoral researchers. This variation and diversity is energising, exhausting, and enjoyable. It actively encourages, and in my experience necessitates, the use of NLP as a
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model for teaching. Being able to build Rapport with any size group and cater for a range of Representational Systems gives any lecturer a distinct advantage, and thus enhances students’ experiences. Due to the far-ranging variation and diversity of my students, I have to be flexible in my approach. This incorporates the Law of Requisite Variety whereby (to paraphrase), the lecturer with most flexibility of behaviour has the most influence on students’ potential to learn. In other words if I can adapt my teaching style to incorporate the Representational Systems of my students, and I can build Rapport then the students are more likely to be attentive. It sounds simple yet there is one large variable...the final responsibility is down to the student: “If students are to learn desired outcomes in a reasonably effective manner, then the teacher’s fundamental task is to get students to engage in learning activities that are likely to result in their achieving those outcomes... It is helpful to remember that what the student does is actually more important in determining what is learned than what the teacher does.” (Shuell 1986 cited in Biggs & Tang 2007) From day one of their degree studies, I map out the process of the course; what is going to happen; in what order and what is to be
RESEARCH
From day one of their degree studies, I map out the process of the course; what is going to happen; in what order and what is to be expected
expected. Therefore, they have a Map of the Territory that they will be exploring during their study, and where to turn for help. The map allows them to see the layout but they still have to negotiate the terrain, explore, and clamber over the territory.
• • •
This map includes certain generic criteria: Attending classes - my courses carry minimum attendance requirements Submitting their assignments on time to avoid late submission penalties Completing a portfolio of work
This information positions my students at Cause. If problems interfere with their studying process students they know that they have access to assistance and most often will request help. Although on occasions when incongruent behaviour is identified, I (or my colleagues) will intervene. This is where recognising behaviour and being able to read the unconscious, non-verbal messages is important. With students safely positioned at Cause rather than Effect, they have the control, power and responsibility to complete their studies. In addition, I signpost and future pace some of the difficulties they may encounter, for example: • Confusion - It’s ok as the next step is understanding • Anxiety - Reframe into the excitement of expectation • Self doubt - If you think you can, you will. If you think you can’t, you’re right. Signposting ‘normalises’ the feelings and thoughts and future pacing allows the student to mentally rehearse a response. Hence, when a student encounters these, or similar, difficulties they are equipped to manage them or at least recognise them as being ‘normal’. Finally, my role with respect to the course and the students is to • Lead them to and through their course. It is a bit like orienteering, as some get lost following the map even though the territory they are traversing is their ‘self ’. • Support and direct to various agencies for help or via feedback. I give extensive written and oral feedback, explaining where marks have been lost and what they can do to gain a higher grade next time. Thus, it is not failure, simply feedback, and they now have another tool (feedback) to achieve success. • Encourage when they feel overwhelmed - “I’ll try and get my essay in but...” - My response is “If you try you will fail, just do it. Either you need an extension so ask for one, or get it in on time.”
Useful references Biggs, J., & Tang, C., (2007) Teaching for Quality Learning at University, Maidenhead, Open University Press Lazarus, J. (2004) The NLP Pocket Handbook, London, Lazarus Lewis,B., & Pucelik, F., (1990) Magic of NLP Demystified, Portland, Metamorphous Press Marden, O.S., (1930’s) He can who thinks he can, London, Rider O’Connor, J., & Seymour, J., (1990) Introducing Neuro-Linguistic Programming, London, Mandala Shepherd, D. (2000) Performance Partnership Handbook, London, PPLtd And… of course Rapport magazine There are many, many others but these are a few of my favourites. Diane is the Programme Coordinator and Lecturer for the BA in Counselling and Psychotherapy at the University of Southampton, and a consultant for Animal Assisted Therapy. D.Hardiman@soton.ac.uk
As more of my students become aware of my NLP training I am asked if I can include more aspects of NLP within their course. I already acknowledge where theories overlap and highlight ‘same process different name’, and encourage my students to discover their own Representational Systems by noting their predicate words and phrases. I feel NLP complements and enhances ‘traditional’ counselling and counsellor training; however these thoughts are for another time... To conclude, NLP is a huge part of how I operate day-to-day and lecture-to-lecture. I feel it encourages an ecological way of working, an attitude towards life, and an approach to aid finding the key to success. If you are a lecturer or student, it is the key to successful graduation. Oh yes... and finally... as for my University colleagues, I am happy to report that things have changed. They have learned a little about NLP and begun to lose their fear, in so doing they are increasingly aware of the value of NLP within the teaching and learning arena. No longer do I have to speak of NLP in the hushed tones of the confessional, along the corridors of academia!
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TRAINING & WORKSHOPS
NLP Training with Auspicium and the Change Team By Will Lewis
W
e’ve all heard that it’s tough out there at the moment and successful businesses are always looking for new ways to improve their business performance. In fact, it is probably more important than ever to have a highly skilled and flexible work force, capable of dealing with the actual psychology of leadership and communication. With this in mind, journalist Will Lewis posed a few questions to David Key, managing director and head of research and development at Ware-based NLP training academy, Auspicium Ltd. (pronunciation: au̇-'spi-kè-'u̇m)
Where does the word Auspicium come from? Our metaphor is a soaring Eagle which I conceived during my Time Line Therapy™ training, and Auspicium is a Latin word which means, bird omen, the foretelling of future events from observing the flight of birds. What are the Auspicium values? Making a difference, Freedom, Fun and many more but they’re our top 3. What do you see as Auspicium’s purpose? We want to continue to “Make a Difference” and “Be a Difference” and have students able to DO NLP when you complete our courses. David is clearly very passionate about using NLP in business. So I was interested to see how it all began... It is over two decades since David first picked up a personal development book. As an eager young salesman David was constantly looking out for quick and easy ways to earn more money. Having watched his sales colleagues earning twice, or even three times as much, in seemingly half
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the time, David was keen to find an answer to this question; How do some people achieve significantly better results than others, more easily? So it was perhaps unsurprising that in his peripheral vision he noticed a book sitting on a shelf of Waterstone’s, entitled “Grow Rich While You Sleep”*. Without hesitation, he bought the book and thought “brilliant, all I have to do is SLEEP and I’ll get wealthy!” Of course, there was much more to this than met his eye and so David’s journey into the world of personal development began…
“Grow Rich While You Sleep” first introduced him to the study of the unconscious mind and he became fascinated by the potential power this could wield over an individuals life and thus their every experience. Eager to learn more he enrolled on a hypnosis course with a Harley Street Hypnotherapist. “It was interesting”, says David “but it felt as if I was only touching the surface of a huge subject matter, and I knew that I had to find out more.” A few months later, he came across “Unlimited Power” by the famous American Motivational speaker, Anthony Robbins and he greatly admired the theories put forward in his book. Attending a Robbins fire walk seminar in Belgium re-awakened his appetite for learning and to this day David is committed to an ongoing training schedule. David explains, “Auspicium are committed to providing outstanding NLP learning experiences. We believe the only way to do this is to continually develop our own range of courses that pull on the resources of some of the world’s most outstanding innovators in NLP.” After delivering numerous NLP Diplomas, Practitioner and Master Practitioner trainings for an INLPTA NLP academy, David decided to branch out and qualify as a Certified and Licensed Trainer of NLP with The American Board of NLP, and also to become an Instructor of Hypnotherapy. This meant he could now also offer a 7 Day Rapid Practitioner course, says David “I realised most business people don’t always have 20 days to do a NLP Practitioner training so, being qualified to deliver 7 Day Rapid Practitioner trainings seemed a logical business decision.” Now, after spending over 20 years doing business with a significant number of global organisations, Auspicium, is well placed to help people in business
TRAINING & WORKSHOPS
It’s not easy for people in business and right now you probably want to be someone who has an edge
achieve more and help them learn to take back control when the chips are down. “It’s not easy for people in business and right now you probably want to be someone who has an edge. By doing your NLP business training with Auspicium you might just become that person. So, make it an easy decision and snap up our complimentary tickets for the first 2 days of our business diploma because we think it’s important for you to experience your NLP training before you buy” What skills do your trainers have? All Auspicium trainers are licensed and come from various business backgrounds. They have trained with a variety of NLP Institutes and Academies including ABNLP, INLPTA and ITA. We position ourselves as meta-leaders in business and we teach NLP specifically within this context. Your goals are our goals; your success is our success. We are committed to sharing our business experience and models with likeminded students who not only want to excel at NLP and make a difference, but who also want to learn how to enhance their own capabilities and remove limiting beliefs so they achieve excellence in their own business, if that’s their goal. Being an outstanding NLPer doesn’t always mean you automatically become a great business person. Be under no illusion, having a good foundation in business skills could make all the difference. Why learn about NLP with Auspicium? Well, even with basic NLP skills you’ll find yourself achieving improvements in your communication, rapport building and goal setting, which all have a proven and positive effect on business performance, including your
bottom line. A recent example is when a sales person on a four-day NLP business diploma with Auspicium discovered he was irritating a potential client with his direct authoritarian approach. He found out after his client called him during his NLP course threatening to end their business relationship. After pleading for a second chance and armed with his new NLP skills, he stepped in to his clients shoes getting a significantly different perspective on his problem and secured a £12 million construction project. Now that’s what I call a great “return on investment”. I wonder how much revenue business people lose because they didn’t gel with their client. It’s probably significant. If true, then how many get told by the client the real reason they didn’t do business with you was because they didn’t trust or feel comfortable with you? The answer is probably none. Auspicium NLP training will help you identify these potential issues and teach you strategies to address them head on easily, with phenomenal results.
learning and applying this goal setting process. The process uses a combination of Movement, Time Lines, Meta Positions and Well Formed Outcome conditions. One student, Mark Straker, volunteered as a demonstration subject on a Diploma course I delivered 3 years ago. Mark had a goal to make a short movie and win an award in Hollywood. He had an idea of making a short movie that could have a positive impact on the attitudes towards racism with young people in schools around the world. This dream was a direct result of his own personal experiences from his childhood. I remember the other students laughing with disbelief when he shared his dream. Mark called me a recently to share some very exciting news; he had been sitting next to Danny Devito at the Beverly Hills Film Festival when he heard his name announced. He won Best Drama Award for his film “One of Us”. So, to his amazement, the process worked and as these techniques can wield incredible results, I always warn students, be careful what you wish for!
How do students get the most from Auspicium trainings? Students come to our training with an open mind and have a sense of humour. Our courses are not for anyone who gets offended easily and they are not therapy. Having said that, we do work that would be seen as therapeutic e.g. dealing with stress, conflict resolution or eliminating fears like, the fear of presenting, which may have negative consequences for your career if left unattended. We teach a great model we named the NLP Present™ and we have seen some amazing goals achieved as a consequence of students
Where do you hold your trainings? Fanhams Hall Hotel in Hertfordshire. It is a beautiful Jacobean Mansion surrounded by 27 acres of magical gardens and is completely equipped for corporate training (it used to be J Sainsbury’s management training centre). Auspicium also do training at client venues around the world. For a special offer for Rapport readers and more information on how to book on an Auspicium training, go to www.auspicium.co.uk/rapport or call 0845 434 0149. * Grow Rich While You Sleep by Ben Sweetland
rapport - Summer 2009
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DIARY
Diary of Events for Summer/Autumn 2009 July 09 NLP Practitioner (modular) 1 Jul 2009 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com Introduction to NLP 1 Jul 2009 St. Michael’s College- Llandaff- Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com NLP Practitioner (modular week days) 1 Jul 2009 Bedfordshire Melody Cheal 01767 640956 melody@gwiztraining.com HNLP Coaching Certification Programme 3 Jul 2009 Warrington Tiffany Kay 0845 833 8831 tiffany@go-beyond-nlp.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 3 Jul 2009 London John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Taster workshop 4 Jul 2009 Ashburton- South Devon Erica Lewis 01803 867209 erica@inspiringaction.co.uk Dynamic Personal Breakthrough 4 Jul 2009 Central London Martin Eldon 020 7538 1100 martin@designyourfuture.co.uk Advanced Language Patterns 4 Jul 2009 Forres Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk NLP Trainer Training Intensive 4 Jul 2009 Dordogne France Sue Knight +441628 604438 sue@sueknight.co.uk Introducing NLP 4 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk The NLP Trainers Training 4 Jul 2009 Chiswick - London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 info@performancepartnership.com NLP Introduction 4 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk NLP Practitioner course 4 Jul 2009 Brighton Terry Elston 0800 074 6425 terryelston@nlpworld.co.uk
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NLP Trainer Training 4 Jul 2009 Dordogne France Sue Knight +441628 604438 sue@sueknight.co.uk NLP Diploma 6 Jul 2009 Manchester Andy Smith 0845 83 855 83 andy@practicaleq.com Free NLP Diploma 6 Jul 2009 Bristol John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Practice Group 7 Jul 2009 ULU - Malet Street WC1 PPD Learning 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk What We Can Learn About Success From Those Who Truly Failed (Curious Lessons From The Asylum) with Andrew T. Austin 7 Jul 2009 Manchester Conference Centre - Sackville St - Manchester M1 3BB Andy Smith 07967 591 313 andy@practicaleq.com NLP Practice Group - Reading Berkshire 9 Jul 2009 Reading - Berkshire Daryll Scott 07767 785419 daryll@mynoggin.co.uk 4 Day Certified NLP Diploma Course 9 Jul 2009 Midlands (Centre Courts) Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk NLP Trainer Training 10 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk Interview Skills For Success 10 Jul 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com A rare opportunity - part two 10 Jul 2009 London Ralph Watson 0844 3572865 ralph@dynamic-communication.com NLP Trainer Training 10 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk NLP Practitioner Course - 7 days 11 Jul 2009 Edinburgh Osmaan Sharif 0845 652 6123 info@abintrasolutions.com
ACCELERATED NLP Practitioner Certification 11 Jul 2009 NOTTINGHAM Colette White 0800 0433 657 or from outside the UK call +44 (0)207 249 5051 info@infiniteexcellence.com ANLP International CIC Practice Group 14th July 2009 Apsley Mill Cottage, Hemel Hempstead ANLP: Lala Ali Khan 0845 053 1162 www.anlp.org members@anlp.org Free NLP Diploma 16 Jul 2009 Manchester John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Practitioner London 17 Jul 2009 London Kirsty McKinnon 0141 248 3913 info@excelr8.co.uk Transforming Self-Concept - part of the Coaching Leaders NLP Master Practitioner Training with Andy Smith 17 Jul 2009 Manchester Conference Centre - Sackville St - Manchester M1 3BB Andy Smith 07967 591 313 andy@practicaleq.com NLP Licensed Master Practitioner Course 18 Jul 2009 The Holiday Inn - Gatwick Airport Christina Mills 01273 626644 christinamills@isiscentre.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 18 Jul 2009 Birmingham John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Trainers Training and Evaluation 20 Jul 2009 London Jeremy Lazarus 020 8349 2929 jeremy@thelazarus.com The NLP Trainers Evaluation 20 Jul 2009 Chiswick - London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 info@performancepartnership.com NLP Business Practitioner 20 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk NLP Business Practitioner 20 Jul 2009 Bristol John Seymour 0845 658 0654 enquiries@john-seymour-associates.co.uk Richmond NLP Group 21 Jul 2009 Richmond - Surrey Henrietta Laitt 020 8874 8203 Henrietta@resultsforsuccess.com
Essentil NLP for Business Success 21 Jul 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 22 Jul 2009 London John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk Effective Interpersonal Skills 22 Jul 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk NLP Learning Forum & Practice Group - Bradford - West Yorkshire 23 Jul 2009 Heaton Mount- Executive Management Centre - Keighley Road - Bradford Kevin Downsworth 01274 585160 kdownsworth.firstposition@blueyonder. co.uk The Hypnosis Trainer’s Training 25 Jul 2009 Chiswick - London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 info@performancepartnership.com NLP Practitioner 27 Jul 2009 Chichester John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk Metaphors and Butterflies 30 Jul 2009 Croydon - UK NLP Academy 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk
August 09 ACCELERATED NLP Master Practitioner Certification 1 Aug 2009 LONDON Colette White 0800 0433 657 or from outside the UK call +44 (0)207 249 5051 info@infiniteexcellence.com
10 Steps to Success 7 Aug 2009 Emily Terry 01243 792122 emily.terry@evolutiontraining.co.uk A rare opportunity - part two 7 Aug 2009 London Ralph Watson 0844 3572865 ralph@dynamic-communication.com Introduction to NLP 8 Aug 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com Practitioner Training NLP 9 Aug 2009 Watford - Herts Sheila Patel 07956 419 324 sheila@claybrooknlp.com Advanced Hypnosis Skills 14 Aug 2009 Manchester Conference Centre - Sackville St - Manchester M1 3BB Andy Smith 07967 591 313 andy@practicaleq.com NLP Practitioner (INLPTA Certified) 21 Aug 2009 Stirling- Scotland Karen Meager 01749 687 102 karen@karenmeager.co.uk Values 22 Aug 2009 Forres - Moray Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk Free Introduction to NLP Seminar (1 day) 27 Aug 2009 Centre Court - Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 27 Aug 2009 London John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk
NLP Practitioner 3 Aug 2009 Bristol John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk
simple steps to a stress free life! 29 Aug 2009 The Eden Project simple life solutions 01736 33 46 81 victoria@simplelife-solutions.co.uk
NLP Trainers Training: Module 1 3 Aug 2009 Brighton - UK NLP Academy 020 8686 9952 info@realnlp.co.uk
Free NLP Diploma 29 Aug 2009 Manchester John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk
Presenting With Power© 4 Aug 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com
September 09
NLP Practice Group - Reading Berkshire 6 Aug 2009 Reading - Berkshire Daryll Scott 07767 785419 daryll@mynoggin.co.uk
Inspirational Communication for Healthcare Professionals 1 Sep 2009 Dolgellau Royal Ship Donna Blinston 7835113589 donna.blinston@inspirationalsolutions-nlp. co.uk
DIARY
NLP Practitioner Certification 1 Sep 2009 North Yorkshire Susi Strang Wood MRCGP 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com The Motivator!© 2 Sep 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com INLPTA NLP Diploma / Practitioner Part 1 3 Sep 2009 Gloucestershire - Midlands Reb Veale +44(0)7790885086 reb@revealsolutions.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 3 Sep 2009 Birmingham John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk A rare opportunity - part two 4 Sep 2009 London Ralph Watson 0844 3572865 ralph@dynamic-communication.com NLP Master Practitioner (INLPTA certified) 4 Sep 2009 Bristol Karen Meager 01749 687 102 karen@karenmeager.co.uk Interview Skills For Success 5 Sep 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com NLP Practitioner Course Aberdeen 5 Sep 2009 Aberdeen Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk NLP Diploma| 5 Sep 2009 Aberdeen Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk Age with Attitude 5 Sep 2009 Various 10 days over 10 months Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com Free NLP Diploma 5 Sep 2009 Bristol John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk ACCELERATED NLP Practitioner Certification 5 Sep 2009 LONDON Colette White 0800 0433 657 or from outside the UK call +44 (0)207 249 5051 info@infiniteexcellence.com NLP Practitioner Glasgow 6 Sep 2009 Glasgow Kirsty McKinnon 0141 248 3913 info@excelr8.co.uk
NLP Foundation (Part 1 of practitioner) (£369) 7 Sep 2009 Accenture training centre - Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com ANLP International CIC Practice Group 8th September 2009 Apsley Mill Cottage, Hemel Hempstead ANLP: Lala Ali Khan 0845 053 1162 www.anlp.org members@anlp.org Presentation Skills Enhancer 8 Sep 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 8 Sep 2009 London John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Basics (part 2 of practitioner) (£ 699) 9 Sep 2009 Accenture training centre - Milton Keynes Michael Beale 01908 506563 michaelbeale@ppimk.com NLP Practice Group - Reading Berkshire 10 Sep 2009 Reading - Berkshire Daryll Scott 07767 785419 daryll@mynoggin.co.uk Advanced Influencing Skills - Master Practitioner module with Andy Smith 11 Sep 2009 Manchester Conference Centre - Sackville St - Manchester M1 3BB Andy Smith 07967 591 313 andy@practicaleq.com Passion in Action 11 Sep 2009 Covent Garden - Central London PPD Learning 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk 7 Day Fast Track NLP Practitioner 12 Sep 2009 Sandwich Kent Lindsey Agness 01304 621735 info@thechangecorporation.com Diploma in Clinical Hypnotherapy2009/10 12 Sep 2009 North Yorkshire Craig Wood 01287 654175 drsusistrang@aol.com NLP Practitioner Inverness: Module 1 12 Sep 2009 Inverness Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk INLPTA NLP Foundation Diploma 12 Sep 2009 Aston Hotel - Near Darlington Co Durham Alan Johnson 001609 778543 enquire@trainofthought.org.uk NLP Diploma Inverness 12 Sep 2009 Inverness Rosie O’Hara 01309 676004 info@nlphighland.co.uk
INLPTA NLP Practitioner: Module 1 12 Sep 2009 Aston Hotel - near Darlington Alan Johnson 01609 778543 enquire@trainofthought.org.uk Introduction to NLP 13 Sep 2009 Cornwall Joseph W Pritchard 01326 212959 joseph@zeteticmind.com NLP Practice Group 15 Sep 2009 ULU- Malet Street WC1 PPD Learning 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Communication Excellence 15 Sep 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk NLP Diploma for Healthcare Professionals 15 Sep 2009 Dolgellau Royal Ship Donna Blinston 01341 450663 donna.blinston@inspirationalsolutions-nlp. co.uk Success Practitioner 16 Sep 2009 Central London Martin Eldon 020 7538 1100 martin@designyourfuture.co.uk Advance Your Sales Capabilities 16 Sep 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk INLPTA NLP Practitioner (Evening Class) 16 Sep 2009 Ewell - Surrey Carole Simmons - registered INLPTA NLP Trainer 0781 491 2751 carole@carolesimmons.com Discover NLP 17 Sep 2009 Covent Garden - Central London PPD Learning 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Coaching with NLP Practitioner 18 Sep 2009 Exeter Jane Stubberfield 01392 841153 jane@jsa-development.co.uk Aether Intensive 19 Sep 2009 Chiswick - London Dr. David Shephard 0208 992 9523 info@performancepartnership.com NLP Practioner training 7 day course 20 Sep 2009 Birmingham Maxine Watts 7766954284| max@kanousei.co.uk Enhance Your Personal Effectiveness 22 Sep 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk
Unique Master Practitioner programme in TURKEY! 22 Sep 2009 Bodrum - Turkey Ralph Watson 0844 3572865 ralph@dynamic-communication.com NLP Learning Forum & Practice Group - Bradford - West Yorkshire 24 Sep 2009 Heaton Mount - Executive Management Centre - Keighley Road - Bradford Kevin Downsworth 01274 585160 kdownsworth.firstposition@blueyonder. co.uk Free Introduction to NLP Seminar (1 day) 24 Sep 2009 Centre Court - Midlands Daksha Malik 0121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk Richmond NLP Group 24 Sep 2009 Richmond - Surrey Henrietta Laitt 020 8874 8203 Henrietta@resultsforsuccess.com INLPTA NLP Practitioner Training 24 Sep 2009 London Helen Drake 0208 995 2864 helen@pointtaken.com
Chichester NLP Practice Group 29 Sep 2009 Chichester - West Sussex Emily Terry 01243 792122 emily.terry@evolutiontraining.co.uk Essential Soft Skills for Managers 29 Sep 2009 Midlands Daksha Malik 00121 711 7030 Daksha.Malik@uniqueminds.co.uk Certified NLP Practitioner for Business 29 Sep 2009 Reading - Berkshire Daryll Scott 07767 785419 daryll@mynoggin.co.uk Introduction to NLP 30 Sep 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com Inspirational Management Understanding and Influencing Behaviour for Healthcare Professionals 30 Sep 2009 Aberysthwerth Donna Blinston 7835113589 donna.blinston@inspirationalsolutions-nlp. co.uk
INLPTA Diploma 24 Sep 2009 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway® Workshop 24 Sep 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com NLP Practitioner - Part 1 24 Sep 2009 Covent garden - Central London PPD Learning 0870 7744 321 info@ppdlearning.co.uk Free NLP Diploma 25 Sep 2009 London John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk NLP Practitioner Course - 7 days 26 Sep 2009 London Osmaan Sharif 0845 652 6123 info@abintrasolutions.com Accredited NLP Diploma (INLPTA) 28 Sep 2009 St. Michael’s College - Llandaff - Cardiff Andy Garland +44 (0)800 612 2878 andy@you.uk.com Free NLP Diploma 28 Sep 2009 Bristol John Cassidy-Rice www.free-nlp.co.uk john@free-nlp.co.uk Business Practitioner 28 Sep 2009 Alvechurch - West Midlands Ellen Gifford 01527 585310 ellen@thelearningpath.co.uk
To get your workshops and events listed in Rapport, log in as a member to www.anlp.org and enter your events into the online diary. Every issue, online events listed for the next 3 months will be included in Rapport. rapport - Summer 2009
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A collection of new stories, analogies and metaphors from best selling author Nick Owen The Salmon of Knowledge Stories for Work, Life, the Dark Shadow, and OneSelf Nick Owen There are well over 140 stories in this collection, from ancient to contemporary, from all points of the compass, organised by theme, and which suggest ways to see ourselves and our organisations less as discrete items in a faceless, mechanistic universe and rather more as unique dynamic forces operating interdependently within an immense and utterly fascinating wholeness. The stories invite us to wake up, stop taking ourselves so seriously, look at the world from perspectives other than our own, and recognise that only by changing ourselves can we reconnect with what is truly important in life. The stories offer ways to do just that for, to slightly paraphrase the words of Dogen Zenji, if you want to know the Truth first you must study yourself. Here is an example: Busy-ness A successful businessman asked a monk: “What do you do to make a living?” “Nothing,” the monk replied. “Isn’t that laziness?” “Not at all. Laziness is the art of finding countless ways to distract yourself. Usually, being ‘busy’ is a strategy people use to avoid asking themselves the really difficult and necessary questions that most need to be asked. Most often, laziness is the vice of people who are too busy.” The root of the word business, incidentally, comes from the Old English bisignis, meaning anxiety. Nick Owen is an experienced trainer, consultant, and coach. He has also enjoyed successful careers as a professional actor and theatre director, radio and print journalist, writer and storyteller. He combines work in the corporate and professional sectors with work in the arts and education, bringing a broad range of creative and innovative perspectives to the work at hand. He is the author of two bestselling books on creativity, personal development, and leadership, The Magic of Metaphor ISBN 9781899836703 and More Magic of Metaphor 9781904424413
ISBN 9781845901271 £16.99 available June 2009
Other best selling titles from Nick Owen The Magic of Metaphor 77 Stories for Teachers Trainers and Thinkers ISBN 9781899836703 £16.99 available now
More Magic of Metaphor Stories for Leaders, Influencers and Motivators ISBN 9781904424413 £18.99 available now
visit www.anglo-american.co.uk or contact us on 01267 211880
BOOK REVIEWS
rapport book review The Genius Symbols Silvia Hartmann £24.95, Dragon Rising Publishing I love the idea of a new set of simply drawn, neutral, basic symbols as keys to access the immense creative resources of our unconscious minds. Silvia Hartmann’s 23 symbols include some that represent universal elements of our experience and some that I found too specific or counter intuitive. I felt that some key elements of life, such as science and technology were missing; however Hartmann recommends making your own set and suggests that you can add or change symbols to suit. What you do with these symbols, once made, is confused and vague. The book reads like transcripts of ‘trances’ from one of the author’s courses and is peppered with frequent suggestions, FAR TOO MANY CAPITALISATIONS, underlinings and
exclamations. These might hypnotise and entrance a listening audience to “play EVERY TOPIC with delight”, but such emphasis does not work so well in print. A glossary, references to Hartmann’s original sources and influences and a reading list for these would be beneficial. There are strengths to this book: the section on “Games to Play” offers many creative suggestions for working with these symbols. Readers who want to have full instructions and well-thought out applications would be disappointed. Readers who are prepared to take these creative ideas and fly with them might enjoy making their own set and exploring and inventing their own applications. Susanna Bellini, Book Review Panel
HUMAN CAPITAL MANAGEMENT Achieving Added Value Through People Angela Baron & Michael Armstrong £25, Kogan Page In this book, Baron and Armstrong set out to provide a practical guide to the subject of human capital management (HCM) and show how it can deliver extra value to organisations. HCM centres on the collection of data to support how an organisation should manage its people. The concept behind HCM is that people are assets (rather than expenses as they are often regarded) and by investing in them just like they would in new equipment, organisations will reap the benefits in improved customer satisfaction, staff performance, and ultimately, business success. This book gives a thorough consideration of the topic, backing it up with plenty of references to other publications and research. As a result it leans more towards being an academic book rather than the more general information texts
usually reviewed here. However, it is also a very practical book, giving advice on the whole journey of applying HCM in an organisation - what it is, what it can do for the organisation, what to consider before measuring data, how to measure data, where to apply HCM, and how to make best use of the results. The appendix also contains a wide range of tools that can be used by managers. In summary I would say that the authors have achieved their aim and written a comprehensive guide to human capital management for HR managers and more general senior managers alike, providing a good combination of theory, practical guidance, and real-life examples; in short, it tells you everything you would want and need to know about the subject. Elaine Morrisroe, Book Review Panel
Transform the way you live and work: Achieve your goals: Strategies to transform your life Andy Smith £6.99, DK Books This book is really for those who have already decided they want to change and have a positive mindset in place. Assuming the reader is coming from that perspective, I would suggest it is a book best worked through with a friend. The tools are such that they could easily be read superficially, without impact, if done in isolation. In order to really interact with the book, readers need to set aside time and find somewhere they can really explore the tools posed here, with someone who can challenge and prompt as
goals are verbalised and set. It may also be that readers may benefit from working through some of the issues in greater depth with a coach to see any significant shifts. Having said that - no prior knowledge of NLP is necessary to read the book and the book is easy to read and really is pocket sized to carry round. This is a useful introduction and guide for someone already in the right frame of mind to change and just looking for some guidance on goal setting. Suzanne Henwood, Book Review Panel
rapport - Summer 2009
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AUTHOR INTERVIEW
Marcus D’Silva Shares the Secrets of Self Hypnosis
Marcus D’Silva is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Coach and Speaker based in Bromley, Kent. In writing his book “How to Change Your Life - with the Amazing Secrets of Hypnosis: Powerful Techniques for Achieving Health Happiness and Success” he set out to produce a book that was “part inspirational pop psychology and part self hypnosis manual” with the intention of sharing this powerful technique with a wider circle of people. Andy Coote spoke to him.
S
elf hypnosis and hypnotherapy are possibly the best self help tools on the planet and I’ve tried many of them” Marcus D’Silva told me when we spoke recently. “I’ve written this book about Self Hypnosis because not only has it enhanced my life but I’d seen it enhance the lives of many, many of my clients, too and I want others to discover the benefits.” His motivation to write also comes from his own experience of adversity and of overcoming major problems, which included bankruptcy and the loss of his business. Marcus became a hairdresser when he left school. He enjoyed working with people and was good at it. “By age 24, I had two hair salons which I sold in my late twenties and got into complementary health work. I came across flotation tanks - a form of meditation - and decided to base my business around them.” In 1990, he opened a flotation centre in Bromley - one of only 3 in the country at that time - and started building a group of therapists including masseurs and acupuncturists around that. “I put out 10,000 flyers around the town for an open day on Sunday and had 300 people through the door between 10 and 5”. The business started strongly but by 1993 - just 3 years later - he had to go out of business and was made bankrupt. The first 18 months went well but by the third year it was heading for disaster. “I lost everything and went through a pretty tough time.” Through reading widely about therapy, meditation and hypnosis, “doors began to open in my mind and I retrained as a remedial sports massage therapist.” He worked as a massage therapist in the USA and elsewhere but then got RSI in the hand. “I decided to reframe
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and do something even more exciting. I began learning clinical hypnotherapy and coaching and that has been my focus ever since.” Having worked with clients for around 11 years, Marcus has come to the conclusion that hypnosis, and trance, affects everything in our lives. “Many self help books have exercises and techniques to teach how to relax and focus, visualise images and also affirmations - all of
hypnosis books whilst delivering practical help. I used a lot of hypnosis myself in preparing the book and in bringing my own experiences into it.” The exercises, of which there are many, mix self-hypnosis with NLP and other techniques. Marcus sees hypnosis and NLP as complementary. “Richard Bandler is a fantastic hypnotist. The major models on which NLP was based were hypnotic in their process. Dr Milton Erickson was not only a psychiatrist but also a great hypnotist and Virgina Satir was a family therapist who used processes that were purely hypnotic – including centering, affirmation and parts integration. She used techniques to create a trance state.” Milton Erickson’s influence is becoming more prominent in the NLP world again. “Many people have explored NLP now and are getting interested in the hypnosis side of it. Steven Gilligan who wrote Therapeutic Trances, the best book on inducing Ericksonian hypnosis, also works with NLP techniques and gave the keynote address to the NLP Conference in 2008. I think that NLP has helped hypnosis to become more mainstream.” Solution Focused Therapy (SFT) played a major part in the development of the content of the book. SFT was developed by Steve de Shazer and is continued by his wife Insoo Kim Berg. It draws on the work of Milton Erickson, and others including Gregory Bateson and Virginia Satir. SFT puts a focus on the present and the future using hypnotic language. “You then go into a trance to imagine the future.” Hypnotic language is important to D’Silva and he covers in some detail the difference in
I wanted to get away from the quite dry, almost boring image of self hypnosis books whilst delivering practical help which are a form of self hypnosis packaged in a different way.” The reason that they are not explicitly labelled as hypnosis might be that hypnosis has a negative perception in some places. “This could stem from the 1931 film about Svengali with John Barrymore which was a spoof film but taken literally by some.” American hypnotist Ralph Slater was successfully sued for negligence and assault in 1950 and the backlash led to the Hypnotism Act 1952, requiring stage hypnotism to be licensed and to a perception of people being made to do things against their will. That perception, Marcus maintains, “could not be further from the truth.” The audience for the book is quite wide. “Hypnosis is a natural part of life and its effects can be so positive, I wanted to get away from the quite dry, almost boring image of self
AUTHOR INTERVIEW outcomes between asking ‘why’ questions (which lead to blaming) and ‘how’ questions (which lead to progress). Physiology also plays a part in the change process. In an exercise, he combines a change in physiology with an NLP Swish Pattern, to build a powerful connection between the body and feelings. To illustrate the power of this connection, D’Silva talks about the experiences of Captain Gerald Coffee, an American airman held for 7 years in prison camps in Vietnam. “He was held in a tiny cell. He visualised games of golf, moving around and physically ‘playing’ the game and when he was released his golf game had improved considerably. His physiology and his imagination worked together to do that.” Hypnotic attraction is also the subject of a chapter. The film ‘The Secret’ introduced the ‘Law of Attraction’, the idea that you can manifest things into your life through the power of thought. Marcus comments, “It has not, in my view, been proven to be a law of the universe but if you strip it down to its essentials, it is a form of self hypnosis. You imagine something, hold the image and enhance it, then it will manifest if you have the desire and do something about it.” You need to focus on what you really want and not what you don’t, he contends. “Perhaps when we do that, we change our filters so that we see more of what we want and tune into it like a radio. Most people focus on what they don’t want and if you keep doing that, you’ll get that. It is all about focussing on positive outcomes.” The book will cover familiar ground for many NLP practitioners and hypnotherapists, however, from my reading of it, I suggest that it will provide reminders and insights that will enhance existing knowledge. It is also a book that may be a good reference for clients to read and use as an additional resource alongside NLP coaching or therapy sessions. It is a readable and content rich resource and one that you may find that you return to for reference and ideas.
Self Hypnosis and Visualisation in the Writing Process Self hypnosis plays a big part in Marcus’ approach to writing. “I sit, close my eyes and relax allowing 15 – 20 minutes before writing. I have a small office with a PC set up on a tailor-made desk. I always do my writing there and don’t pollute it with day-to-day activity. I put myself in the right state first. If what I am writing needs to be inspirational, I find an inspiring state, changing my posture, words and images until I am jumping with excitement.” Visualising the book, he finds, also helps to
stimulate the process. “I thought about the title and back cover blurb early in the process. The working title can change later but having one at this stage does help to concentrate ideas about what you are writing. You need to be interested in and excited about your own book. Writing the back cover blurb and mocking up a book cover on the computer helped with achieving that excitement. Imagining how it will look starts the process by putting an image of the end result in your mind.”
Details How to Change Your Life - with the Amazing Secrets of Hypnosis: Powerful Techniques for Achieving Health Happiness and Success by Marcus D’Silva. Paperback: 168 pages. Price £11.99 Publisher: New London Publishing Ltd (29 Jun 2009) ISBN: 978-0955444616
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ANLP NEWS
NEWSFLASH* New ANLP Practice Group
W
e are delighted to announce that we will be launching a new practice group in Hemel Hempstead on 14th July in the Conference Room at The Paper Trail, Apsley Lock. This group will meet on a monthly basis between 7pm and 9pm. We are very keen to encourage as many of you as possible to come along and make this a fantastic evening. Our speaker for the 14th will be Gemma Bailey, Gemma already has a strong following in the NLP community and is always inspiring to listen to. Other speakers we already have lined up are: • Robert Smith • David Key • Ralph Watson • Jeremy Lazarus The cost for this event will be just £5 including coffee and biscuits. This will be an opportunity for a lively exchange of views, an opportunity to learn, meet interesting people, to be inspired, have an enjoyable evening, and, of course, practice! This is open to both NLP professionals and those simply seeking to find out more about NLP. Please book early to avoid disappointment. Call 020 3051 6740 or email members@anlp.org
Blog Update
F
or those of you who follow the ANLP Online Blog on www.anlp.org, we are really happy to announce that Ana (author of Keeping a Positive Mind During Pregnancy, 7th April 2009) has now had a beautiful and healthy baby girl called Aanya Eva, born on the 29th May 2009 weighing 7lbs 2oz. Congratulations from all at ANLP and Rapport! If you would like to be an ANLP Guest Blogger please contact Lala on members@anlp.org.
Rapport Winners
W
e would like to say a big thank you to everyone who completed the Rapport Readers Survey in the Spring issue. The lucky winners are (in alphabetical order): Melanie Brooks, John Chisholm, Joe Isaac, Sarah MacKay and 6 others. Congratulations to you all!
Focus Groups W
e have had a brilliant response to our appeal for volunteers to become involved in our Focus Groups. As a Community Interest Company (CIC) your opinions and support are essential to ensure that ANLP represent a wide range of views within the NLP Community. We will be in touch with you all during July to move these groups forward to the next stage.
If anyone would like to register their interest to become involved in any of the Focus Groups, please contact the ANLP Office on members@anlp.org or 0845 053 1162.
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REGIONAL GROUPS
rapport networking contact Practice Group of the month
Andy Garland of the NLP Practice Group - Cardiff
England - North Harrogate Achievers Club Sonia Marie Saxton Tel: 0845 257 0036 Email: smesaxton@saxtonpartners.co.uk Harrogate Practice Group Elizabeth Pritchard Tel: 01326 212 959 Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com Lancaster Practice Group Dave Allaway Tel: 01524 847 070 Email: dave@depthfour.com www.life-passion.co.uk Lancs - Nr Clitheroe Dawn Haworth Tel: 01254 824 504 Email: admin@nlpand.co.uk www.nlpand.co.uk Leeds - West Yorkshire Liz Tolchard Tel: 01943 873 895 Mob: 07909 911 769 Email: liztolchard@live.com Manchester Business NLP and Emotional Intelligence Group Andy Smith Tel: 0845 83 855 83 Email: andy@practicaleq.com www.manchesternlp.co.uk Manchester NLP Group Gary Plunkett Tel: 08707 570292 Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nwnlpgroups@aol.com
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NLP Practice Group – Cardiff
F
un, fun, fun! That’s our motto at the NLP Practice Group in Cardiff and you’ll find lots of it, and of course plenty of opportunities to practice your NLP skills and learn from people with a wide range of experience and backgrounds. Whether you’re a qualified practitioner or just want to find out more about NLP, come along and meet a friendly group of NLP’ers! There’s no fixed agenda though we always plan to practice a different NLP technique each month. It’s a great place to continue your professional development and your confidence will grow each month as you realise how much you already know! We share the latest developments in NLP and discuss the successes we’ve had with our clients, and the things that didn’t work so well. Every second month we invite a guest speaker along to discuss other complimentary therapies and share with us their best practice. So far we’ve had talks on the Universal Law of Attraction,
Newcastle Upon Tyne Philip Brown Tel: 0191 456 3930 Mob: 0777 228 1035 North Yorkshire Alan Johnson Tel: 01609 778 543 www.nlpnorthallerton.co.uk North West & North Wales (Chester) Gary Plunkett Tel: 08707 570 292 Email: enrol@high-achievers.co.uk nlp4fun@aol.com Warrington Tiffany Kay Tel: 0845 833 8831 Email: tiffany@go-beyond-nlp.co.uk www.WarringtonNLP.co.uk York Philip Callaghan Tel: 01904 636 216 Email: info@bronze-dragon.com www.bronze-dragon.com/nlp_group.shtml
England - South Bedfordshire Melody and Joe Cheal Tel: 01767 640956 Email: info@gwiztrainig.com www.gwiztraining.com Berkshire NLP Group Balbir Chagger Mob: 07944 931 437 Email: berkshirenlpgroup@googlemail.com www.lifestorytherapeuticcentre.com/NLP.aspx
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Clinical Hypnotherapy and Fear Busting, to name just a few! Andy Garland, the event organiser is a lecturer at Cardiff University in the School of Social Sciences and runs a successful company offering a wide range of therapies and training courses. Andy often shares his experience with the practice group, and comments, “I believe NLP should be available to everyone and our practice group in Cardiff always encourages this.” We currently meet at St, Michael’s College in Cardiff on a Tuesday evening each month. If you’d like to come along, or to find out more visit us at www.you.uk.com. You can also call free on 0800 612 2878. We look forward to meeting you soon! Event Organiser, Andy Garland NLP Practice Group, Cardiff
Croydon Michael Carroll Tel: 020 8686 9952 Email: info@realnlp.co.uk www.nlpacademy.co.uk
London - Central Adrian Hope-Lewis Tel: 07970 639552 Mob: 07970 639552 www.nlpgroup.freeserve.co.uk
Hants - NLP South Nigel Heath Tel: 01794 390 651 Email: heatherapy@aol.com www.nlp-south.org.uk
London - Central (Business) Mark Underwood Tel: 020 7249 7472
Hertfordshire ANLP International CIC Practice Group ANLP: Lala Ali Khan Tel: 0845 053 1162 Email: Members@anlp.org www.anlp.org Hertfordshire - Letchwoth James Rolph Tel: 01462 674411 Email: james@resource-ecologies.co.uk Kent & East Sussex NLP Group Beverley Hamilton Tel: 01892 511231 Email: beverley.hamilton@uwclub.net London - Hampstead Najma Zaman Tel: 020 8926 1297 mob: 07950477318 Email: firstpath@btinternet.com London - Central PPD Learning Judith Lowe Tel: 0870 7744 321 Email: info@ppdlearning.co.uk www.ppdlearning.co.uk/community/ our-practice-group
London (Central) Robert Ford Telephone: 08453 962842 Mobile: 07976 715234 Email: livinglifenlp@orange.net London - Central/North Practitioners and above only Jeremy Lazarus Tel: 020 8349 2929 Email: Jeremy@thelazarus.com www.thelazarus.com London - Chiswick The Performance Partnership David Shephard Tel: 020 8992 9523 Email: info@performancepartnership.com www.performancepartnership.com London East - Stratford, E15 Sharon Eden Tel: 020 8597 9200 Email: sharon.eden@womenofcourage.co.uk London - Ladbroke Grove Nina Madden 07906 255 529 mail@ninamadden.com www.ninamadden.com
REGIONAL GROUPS
London NLP & Hypnosis Practice Group Phillip Holt Tel: 08451 306213 Mob: 07061 003 003 Email: enquiries@nlp-london.com www.nlp-london.com
England - East
London NW - SeeHearFeel NLP Rob Tel: 020 8958 5345 http://www.SeeHearFeelNLP.co.uk/
Colchester NLP Group Julian Campbell Tel: 01473 410521 Mob: 07710 781782 Email: nlp@lifechangingtherapies.co.uk www.lifechangingtherapies.co.uk/colnlp.html
London West - Richmond NLP Group Henrietta Laitt Tel: 0208 874 8203 Mob: 07880 614 040 Email: henrietta@richmondnlpgroup.org.uk www.richmondnlpgroup.org.uk North London NLP Tom MacKay Tel: 07815 879 055 Email: tom@mackaysolutions.co.uk www.northlondonnlp.co.uk Oxford Nick King Mob: 0780 253 4150 Email: info@oxfordnlpgroup.org.uk www.oxfordnlpgroup.org.uk Sandwich, Kent. Lindsey Agness or Zoe Young Tel: Lindsey 01304 621735 or 07711 036 192 Zoe 07932 371 164 Email: zoej66@btinternet.com South East London & City Simon Hedley Tel: 07930 275 223 Email: londonpractice@psithinking.co.uk www.psithinking.co.uk/londonnlp practicegroup.htm www.nlpswap.com/ Sussex - Brighton Association of NLP Practitioners Terry Elston Tel: 0800 074 6425 Email: enquiries@nlpworld.co.uk www.nlpworld.co.uk www.nlp-brighton-assoc.org Sussex - Brighton NLP Group Sue Pullen Tel: 01273 508100 Mob: 07739 836236 Email: suepullen@btconnect.com www.brightonnlpgroup.com Sussex - Chichester Roger and Emily Terry Tel: 01243 792 122 Mob: 07810 876 210 Email: info@evolutiontraining.co.uk www.evolutiontraining.co.uk Sussex - Worthing Email: jim@espconsultancy.co.uk West Sussex - Chichester Andrew T. Austin Email: andrew@23nlpeople.com www.nlpstudygroup.com
Cambridgeshire Phil Jones Tel: 07711 711 123 Email: phil@excitant.co.uk www.cambsnlp.co.uk
Essex - Southend Pauline Oliver Tel: 01702 203465 Norfolk NLP Practice Group Stephen Ferrey Tel: 01603 211 961 Email: info@motivational-coaching.co.uk www.motivational-coaching.co.uk Ipswich Steve Marsden Tel: 07889 751578 Email: steve_marsden@btopenworld.com Redbridge - Ilford Glenda Yearwood Tel: 0208 708 3876 Email: glenda.yearwood@redbridge.gov.uk www.redbridge.gov.uk
England - West Bath NLP North East Somerset Philippe Roy Tel: 01225 404 050 Email: pr@in-focus.org www.bathnlp.co.uk Bath NLP Skills Builder Ben Reeve Tel: 01823 334 080 Email: benjamino_32@hotmail.com www.idevelop.co.uk Bournemouth John Chisholm and Michelle Fischer Tel: 01202 424250 info@creative-leadership.co.uk Bristol David Griffiths Tel: 01179 423 310 Email: david@metamorphosis.me.uk Cornwall Practice Group Elizabeth Pritchard Tel: 01326 212 959 Email: elizabeth@zeteticmind.com www.zeteticmind.com Cornwall (West) Robert Ford Telephone: 08453 962842 Mobile: 07976 715234 Email: livinglifenlp@orange.net Devon NLP Practice Group Jane Stubberfield Tel: 01392 841153 Mob: 07887 744299 E-mail: jane@jsa-development.co.uk www.jsa-development.co.uk
Devon - South-West (totnes) NLP Support Group Alice Llewellyn & Anna Scott-Heyward Tel: 01803 866706/01803 323885
Walsall/Birmingham Richard Pearce Tel: 07760 175589 Email: richard@kochin.co.uk
Devon - Torquay Chris Williams Tel: 0781 354 9073
West Midlands - Worcestershire Sharon Rooke & David Smallwood Tel:01905 352 882 Email: sharon@SCRassociates.com info@centralnlp.co.uk www.SCRassociates.com
Devon & Cornwall NLP Practice Group Nick Evans Tel: 01752 245 570 Mob: 07832 357 208 Email: nick@nlp-southwest.co.uk www.nlp-southwest.co.uk/WordPress/?p=72# more-72 Dorset John Chisholm or Brian Morton Tel: 01202 42 42 50 Email: john@creative-leadership.co.uk bmhrd@btinternet.com www.nlpdorset.co.uk Swindon, West Country Tony Nutley 01793 554834 Email: info@ukcpd.net www.ukcpd.net West Somerset Caitlin Collins Tel: 01643 841310 Email: info@naturalmindmagic.com Worcestershire and Gloucestershire Practice Group Kim Phillips Tel: 01386 861916 Email: kimmphillips@hotmail.com
England - Midlands Birmingham (flexible locations and to suit members) Mandy Ward Tel: 0121 625 7193 Mob: 07740 075669 Email: mandy.ward3@virgin.net www.cassykindly.co.uk The Derby NLP Practice Group Karl Walkinshaw Tel: 07971 654 440 Email: karl@k-d-w.co.uk East Midlands NLP Group Rupert Meese Tel: 0115 8226302 Email: rupert.meese@lightmind.co.uk www.lightmind.co.uk/EMNLP Northants - Northampton Ron Sheffield Tel: 01604 812800 Email: ron.sheffield@btinternet.com www.nlpgroups.org
Scotland Edinburgh Centre of Excellence Practice Group Michael Spence Tel: 0131 664 7854 Email: msnlp@btconnect.com Edinburgh NLP Practice Group Patrick Wheatley & Sheena Wheatley Tel: 07765244030/0131 664 4344 Email: wheatley.co@btconnect.com sheena@changingperceptions.org.uk www.changingperceptions.org.uk Forres/Elgin NLP Practice Group (North of Scotland) Rosie O’ Hara Tel: 01309 676004 Email: info@nlphighland.co.uk www.nlphighland.co.uk Glasgow Mina McGuigan Tel: 01236 610 949 Mob: 07916 275 605 Email: mina@nlpacademyscotland.co.uk www.nlpacademyscotland.co.uk Glasgow Centre of Excellence Practice Group Michael Spence Tel: 01316 647 854 Mob: 07710 332 841 Email: msnlp@btconnect.com Glasgow - NLP in Education Jeff Goodwin Tel: 0870 060 1549/0141 248 6484 Email: jeff@nlpscotland.com www.nlpscotland.com Inverness - (Highland) Rosie O’Hara Tel: 01309 676004 Email: info@nlphighland.co.uk, www.nlphighland.co.uk
Wales Shropshire & Mid Wales Practice Group Nick Greer Tel: 01743 361133 Email: nlpgroup@nickgreer.com www.nickgreer.com
Nottingham Timothy Morrell Tel: 07810 484 215 Email: tim@focushigher.co.uk www.focushigher.co.uk
Practice Groups meet regularly and give you the chance to share experiences with like minded individuals and fellow professionals. They also offer you the opportunity to further your knowledge and add to your Continual Professional Development (CPD) through informed lectures and workshops. For further information on the Practice Groups listed, please log on to our website, www.anlp.org If you would like to add your Practice Group to this list or change existing details, please contact Lala on 0845 053 1162 or email members@anlp.org
rapport - Summer 2009
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ENDNOTE
Congruency in NLP (Am I lost)?
By Kevin Laye
A
Trainer once told me that when the co-creators of NLP were asked what NLP was, Richard Bandler, one of the co-creators stated that it was a state of “wanton curiosity”. I like that response, but it makes me curious. Curious about something people bang on a lot about in the NLP circles and that’s congruency. I am sure also, we have all heard of, or have been taught, the presuppositions of NLP, and curiously when asked about this, on a training I did with him, the other cocreator said quite emphatically “there are no presuppositions of NLP”. Curious... yes? So let me look at some of the nonexistent presuppositions and see how they fit together. We are taught
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the map is not the territory, and we each have our own map, and that it is vital to respect someone else’s map to enable ourselves to build rapport and communicate effectively. So why then, sorry, I know in NLP we never ask why... I would like to know specifically how we know not to do that though, and according to whom it should not be asked. Anyway, why then have I witnessed both as a Trainer myself and as a former director of the old Association for ANLP (many moons ago) some very heated and often vehement examples of a lack of this ability to respect another’s map. Often to the point of total dismissal of the opposing point of view, and done often by people who according to their position should know better.
You see, to me, in my map of the world, and my understanding of congruency, that is not very congruent. So, if we may, back to “Wanton curiosity”. I also teach other therapy modalities and processes that can affect rapid change work, one example being Meridian Therapy and I have often noticed when these are discussed, again often with Trainers who should know better and be more open to new things which work, these non-NLP techniques are often dismissed, rather than being integrated and creating the ‘wanton curiosity’ to model them and explore possibilities. I actually had one well known trainer recently dismiss Meridian Therapy as ‘collapsing anchors’.
Well that’s his (or her) particular map, and I should and will respect it, though it differs from my own opinion. That is my personal congruent view, which like my opinion may be wrong, or right. These thoughts (and that is all they are) are my map, and if it doesn’t match your map then that’s okay. I just implore you to think for a moment and notice. If this article is deemed provocative, or you think I am lost, then why do you think that? (Yes I know I used the ‘w’ word again). Keep your answers in mind. NLP is an awesome tool to have in a toolbox. How much better can it be? I have a real ‘wanton curiosity to find out’. Oh, and finally. I am not lost... ‘I am exploring’…
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