Malaysia Review ‘The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists.’
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utside the kitchen of the Master’s Lodge in Malaysia is a virtually impenetrable wall of bamboo that sways and rustles in the occasional cooling breeze that rises from the playing fields. This old Japanese proverb came to mind as I watched it swaying as my wife’s favourite mixing bowl slipped from my soapy fingers and disintegrated on the kitchen tiles. The bowl was bright red and one of the few remaining meaningful pieces that my wife had brought from the UK to personalise our new home in Malaysia four years ago. It was the eve of Chinese New Year and preparations were afoot across Marlborough College Malaysia and in the homes of our parents for the noisiest night of the year. Being February 2021 and mid-lockdown again, many boarders were
spending yet another holiday at school and the aim, as ever, was to make it pleasant, fun and memorable. The slower pace of the holiday, however, was making space for painful reflection that we and our many expatriate colleagues had not seen our families for over 18 months in most cases. My thoughts were on the pressures being faced by my staff and pupils, not on washing the bowl that had recently contained dumpling filling. I was immediately struck by how much I had heard and read recently about bending and bouncing and rebounding, particularly for those in leadership positions – all the qualities that my wife’s lovely bowl did not possess as it lay in pieces. As individuals around the globe face what, to many, are unprecedented worries
‘I was immediately struck by how much I had heard and read recently about bending and bouncing and rebounding, particularly for those in leadership positions.’
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The Marlburian Club Magazine
about their families, health and income, Beaks often find themselves sharing these empathetically, along with the full weight of their own concerns; others shoulder the full weight of corporate success or failure. Since early 2020, organisations everywhere have been in continual crisis management and the fight or flight response has become an almost permanent and unsustainable state for many of those who work overseas. Resilience – the ability to bounce back and carry on – is the Churchillian quality that can be achieved by self-mastery to fortify the mind, body and spirit. We know the importance of setting aside time for mindfulness, gratitude, appreciating nature and people, exercise, diet and sleep. We can certainly build resilience by making healthy choices to cope with and control our stress, rather than choices that ultimately deplete and control us. Good choices make us healthier, happier, more efficient and have even been shown to have significant influence on antibody response levels during vaccinations. However, the 1st-century Stoic, Epictetus, advised that one should ‘on the occasion of every accident that befalls you, remember to turn to yourself and enquire what power you have for turning it to use.’
