Buzz Magazine: Oct. 20, 2011 by Buzz Magazine

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Champaign-Urbana’s community magazine FREE

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week of October 20, 2011

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VOL9 NO40

OCTOBER 20, 2011

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IN THIS ISSUE 5

SLAUGHTER MASSACRE Local filmmaker debuts at The Art

DON’T STAND SO CLOSE

Concert etiquette

MORAL PINK AREA

The code that won the Pink Party

O, HOW THE WINE TALKS

It’s about wine!

VAMPIRES! 4

Y S

PANTONE 138

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ON THE217.COM COMMUNITY Champaign-Urbana may not be a fashion mecca, but Emma profiles a few of CU’s most stylish stores in this week’s fashion column.

Massage Therapy, Couples Massage, Hot Stone Massage This card is good for $10 off first time appointments. Not valid w/ other discounts or promotions. 2nd Floor, 115 W. Main St, Urbana, IL 61801 www.greenyogaspa.com

FOOD & DRINK Even if you love vodka or love to hate it, Karen’s got some suggestions on how to make it taste better! Get some fresh recipes in “Bottoms Up!” online Saturday.

PANTONE COOL GRAY 6

THIS WEEKEND on

MOVIES & TV Check out our new columns every day next week. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and evrrydai 4eva & eternal.

Champaign’s Alternative

WPGU 107.1 FRI

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Music from Missouri. Check out Corrine Ruff’s article on the St. Louis symphony on Wednesday.

Start your weekend off right with the Red Bull Music

MUSIC

Academy at 10pm!

NE COOL GRAY 6

Sat

Keep the party going with DJ Redbeard on Walk the Plank at 9pm! Tune in to “Loud & Local”

Sun

with Tommy Stopka at 9pm to hear the latest scoop on the local scene!

Like us on www.facebook.com/wpgu1071 Listen live at wpgu.com

Go online to see how fashion and music go hand in hand in this week’s Music Mentalist.

buzz

Your guide to this week’s events in CU

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Cheryl Louviere, LMT

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CALENDAR

EDITOR’S NOTE DYLAN SUTCLIFF

Earlier this month, I realized that although I’ve held the editor-in-chief position for around six months now, I have only written once on one of my favorite topics of discussion, Speed Racer. I think most would agree with me when I say that I try to be honest and fair in representing who I am and how I live my life in these editor’s notes. With that in mind, once simply is not enough considering the amount of time I spend with Speed Racer. Over the course of the past year, I’ve forced over 30 people to sit on my couch and watch this movie with me, and I’m not about to stop now. But I couldn’t simply write another note on how I love the 2008 Wachowski-made film; I took care of that a while ago. Last spring, I wrote about my obsession and invited anyone to contact me if they wanted to watch the movie — that I would blow off whatever I was doing to sit down with them and experience the magic. Unfortunately, I didn’t get many biters at all. So here’s a new approach. I contacted Sanford Hess, the owner of the Art Theater in downtown Champaign, about what the specifics were in setting up a showing of Speed Racer sometime in the near future. The Art is one of my favorite businesses in CU, so the idea of having my favorite movie shown there seemed a bit too good to be true; however, he accepted on a few conditions that I assured him I would try my best to achieve. While my number one priority is to get as many people as possible to see Speed Racer (it has yet to make enough money to pay for what was spent), a close second is making sure that The Art doesn’t lose money. Luckily, those two go hand in hand. There is no date set at this time, but no need to worry; when there is one, I’ll be sure to let EVERYONE know. Consider this a warning: starting now until whenever the showing happens at the Art, you will be seeing a lot of Speed Racer in this magazine. I won’t take up much space in editor’s notes or articles, but I assure you: Speed will be around to remind you exactly what so many missed out on in 2008 and that although second chances are rare, sometimes they do happen.

readbuzz.com October 20 - 26, 2011

HEADS

UP!

LIKES

GRIPES

Little fish in a big pond?

Jordan Ramos Assistant Food & Drink Editor

LIKES one flu under control by Max Huppert

buzz staff

On the Web www.the217.com Email buzz@readbuzz.com Write 512 E. Green St., Champaign, IL 61820 CALL 217.337.3801

We reserve the right to edit submissions. buzz will not publish a letter without the verbal consent of the writer prior to publication date. buzz Magazine is a student-run publication of Illini Media Company and does not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the views of the University of Illinois administration, faculty or students.

Adam Barnett Music Editor

GRIPES

» Vomit: Vomit sucks. I haven’t vomited in years. Someone vomited outside my apartment. You know, the big wooden building on Green. Someone vomited and never cleaned it up. It soaked into the wood, and it will smell forever and ever. I hate you, and I hate your vomit. I’m calling you out publicly. You should be ashamed of yourself, and I hate you forever. I HATE YOU. However, there are merits to vomit. For example: In the first grade, my class was required to participate in a Chanukah Assembly. My teachers said that if we weren’t going to be present for the day of the Assembly, then we could sit in the back and have free time while the other kids had to learn Chanukah hits like, “Ocho Candelikas” and “In the Window.” At this opportunity to color for an extra 45 minutes every day, I lied to my teachers and explained that I had a doctor’s appointment that day. This facade lasted a whole month until, finally, it was the night before the assembly. I would show up the next day and have to make up a really good excuse for why I lied about my doctor’s appointment. I was freaking out, so I went up to my parents and said, “I don’t feel good. I can’t go to school tomorrow.” They saw through my lie and said, “Unless you wake up in the middle of the night throwing up with a fever, you’re going to school.” I woke up at 3 am, vomiting for a whole hour. I had the stomach flu, didn’t have to go to school for the assembly, and I could only eat popsicles for a whole week. Thank you, vomit.

everything you need @

newstudents.dailyillini.com Ballroom·Latin·Nightclub

Dance competition Saturday, October 22, 9am–11pm Illini Union Rooms A, B and C

UIUC students: Free General Public: $5 Funded by SORF

www.illinois.edu/ro/dancing

Ad Sponsored by:

Cover Design Tyler Schmidt Editor in Chief Dylan Sutcliff Managing Editor Peggy Fioretti Art Director Olivia La Faire Copy Chief Drew Hatcher Photography Editor Sean O’Connor Image Editor Peggy Fioretti Photographers Sean O’Connor, Animah Boakye, Lauren Leonatti Designers Lucas Albrecht , Michael Zhang Music Editor Adam Barnett Food & Drink Editor Samantha Bakall Movies & tv Editor Nick Martin Arts & entertainment Editor Joe Lewis Community Editor Amy Harwath CU Calendar Tracey Woodland Copy Editors Casey McCoy, Sarah Jo Alo online Editor Emily Siner Distribution Brandi and Steve Wills EDITORIAL ADVISER Marissa Monson Publisher Lil Levant

TALK TO BUZZ

If you think you’re immune to the influenza virus just because you didn’t catch it last year, it might be time to reconsider that position. The flu affects millions of Americans of all areas and age groups each year and usually leads to thousands of hospitalizations. Although for most people the flu is not a lifethreatening illness, it can lead to severe sickness and even death for at-risk groups, including older Americans and those with certain chronic health conditions. Major signs and symptoms of the flu are fever, sore throat, coughing and a runny nose. The flu virus is easy to pass on, especially by students sharing living spaces, and even those not currently feeling sick may be able to infect others. There are many strains of the flu, but the vaccine protects against the most common seasonal ones. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, flu season begins in October and usually peaks around January or February, making this an ideal time to get vaccinated. The McKinley Health Center at the University offers free flu shots to students who have paid their Health Services Fee, and both McKinley and the CDC encourage all students to get the vaccine. Receiving flu shots every flu season is considered the ideal method to protect against influenza. Students should bring a valid ID to McKinley when they come in for the flu shot. Non-students or those who have opted out of health insurance coverage can receive the shot for $25. More information on the vaccination and symptoms of the flu is available at www.cdc.gov/flu.

» Ryan Braun’s numbers: I’m a Cubs fan, so I’m jealous of this guy’s numbers as opposed to the Cubs’ leftfielder’s numbers. Gag. Ryan Braun hit over .330 this season, rounded up over 100 RBIs, became part of the 30-30 club and is an MVP candidate for the National League. Not to mention that he actually performs well in the postseason. The guy is lethal with a bat, and I love him for it. » Ryan Braun’s face: Also, he is so incredibly attractive, provided his hair isn’t all long and unruly. But even then, holy cow. » Ryan Braun’s abs: Also, his body is that of the gods. Google image him, and you’ll find a picture where he is lifting his shirt up while running the bases. His abs have abs. That single picture explains everything you need to know to understand my love for the Brewers’ leftfielder.

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A 30, 60 OR 90 MINUTE MASSAGE

CAMPS AND VAMPS Taking the creatures of the night less seriously

ARC 239-5865

by Joyce Famakinwa

I Expires 12/31/11

Week of Fri, Oct. 21 through Thurs. Oct. 27, 2011

The Way (PG-13) Fri: (5:00), 7:30 | Sat & Sun: (2:30), (5:00), 7:30 Mon & Tue: 7:30 | Wed: (5:00), 7:30 | Thu: 5:00 Fright Night (R) $3 Late Night Movie. 2D from a 35mm print.

Fri & Sat: 10:00 PM | Wed: 10:00 PM Alfred Hitchock’s Psycho (R) Digitally Presented, with discussion by C-U Film Society.

Sat & Sun: 12:00 PM

Ra.One (NR) From a 35mm print. Brand new from India! Subtitled

Thu: 7:30 PM 126 W. Church St. Champaign

Take the CUMTD Bus Thu: 5:30 PM www.theCUart.com

SAVOY 16 217-355-3456

S. Neil St. (Rt. 45) at Curtis Rd. GQTI.com and on Facebook

$5.75

BARGAIN TWILIGHT D A I LY 4 : 0 0 - 6 : 0 0 P M * excludes Digital 3D & Fathom events

DIGITAL PROJECTION BRIGHTER AMAZING CLARITY

SHOWTIMES 10/21 - 10/27

No passes S Stadium seating

TITLES AND TIMES SUBJECT TO CHANGE RUSH: TIME MACHINE WED. 10/26 - 7:00 PM

FALL MOVIES

Saturday & Sunday 9 & 10 AM

DIARY OF A WIMPY KID: RODRICK RULES (PG)

THE HAMMER - BASED ON THE LIFE OF MATT HAMILL THUR. 10/27 - 7:00 PM THUR. 10/27 BUTTERFINGER THE 13TH AT 7:30 PM & JACK THE RIPPER: THE DEFINITIVE STORY AT 8:15 PM GHOSTBUSTERS THUR. 10/27 - 7:05 PM

PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3 (R)

11:35, 1:40, 3:45, 5:50, 7:55, 10:00 FRI/SAT LS 12:05 S 12:55, 3:00, 5:05, 7:10, 9:15 FRI/SAT LS 11:20 3D THE THREE MUSKETEERS (PG-13) $2.50 PREMIUM PER 3D TICKET 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45 S THE THREE MUSKETEERS (PG-13) 11:00, 1:30, 4:00, 6:30, 9:00 FRI/SAT LS 11:30 S JOHNNY ENGLISH REBORN (PG) 12:20, 2:40, 5:00, 7:20, 9:40 FRI/SAT LS 11:55 S MIGHTY MACS (G) 11:40, 2:05, 4:20, 6:45, 9:05 FRI/SAT LS 11:40 THE BIG YEAR (PG) 11:25, 1:55, 4:15, 6:40, 9:00 FRI/SAT LS 11:15 FOOTLOOSE (PG-13) 11:00, 1:25, 3:55, 6:25, 8:55 FRI/SAT LS 11:25 S 11:30, 2:00, 4:25, 7:00, 9:30 FRI/SAT LS 12:00 THE THING (R) 11:50, 2:10, 4:30, 6:50, 9:10 FRI/SAT LS 11:35 S 7:30, 9:50 REAL STEEL (PG-13) 11:05, 1:45, 4:35, 7:15, 10:00 THE IDES OF MARCH (R) FRI-WED 12:00, 2:20, 4:40, 7:05, 9:20 FRI/SAT LS 11:45 TH 12:00, 2:20, 4:40, 9:20 50/50 (R) FRI-WED 11:20, 1:50, 4:35, 6:55, 9:25 FRI/SAT LS 11:50 TH 11:20, 1:50, 4:35 DOLPHIN TALE (PG) FRI-TUE 11:15, 2:05, 4:40, 7:05, 9:35 WED-TH 11:15, 2:05, 4:40, 9:35 MONEYBALL (PG-13) 1:20, 4:10, 7:00, 9:55 S 3D THE LION KING (G) $2.50 PREMIUM PER 3D TICKET FRI/SAT/MON-TH 11:10, 1:15, 3:20, 5:25 SUN 11:10, 1:15, 5:25

buzz

t is safe to say that vampires are everywhere. Hardcore horror film fans complain that creatures of the night just aren’t scary anymore. It seems like modern vampires would rather steal your high school girlfriend than rip her throat out. They have been defanged. There is a case to make for the fact that vampires have always been a little goofy. Here are some films that exemplify this. Blacula (1972) Director: William Crain The transatlantic slave trade is the type of serious topic that you would expect to feel out of place in a vampire movie. In Blacula, this is exactly what kick-starts the plot. It is 1780, and in an effort to end the slave trade, African Prince Mamuwalde (William Marshall) makes a trip to Transylvania. He wants to gain an ally, so he asks for the help of the legendary count Dracula. Let’s just say that the count has other plans (and at least in this film, he is kind of racist). He turns Mamuwalde into a fellow creature of the night and traps him in a coffin that he is not released from until 1972. When two interior decorators (aka the very obvious first victims) BUZZ purchase the coffin and bring it to Los Angeles, they are met with a nasty surprise. THURSDAY Just like inOCTOBER other blaxploitation films, we get a little 20 corp note...keep this same size always bit of social commentary. When the bodies start piling up, Dr. Gordon Thomas (Thalmus Rasulala) X 5.417 questions1whether the police’s negligence is conpagebeing black. At the same nected to1/8th the victims time, there is also some homophobia involving the interior designers. Blacula is filled with campy moments like when Thomas stakes a vampire and has to repeatedly hit the stake with a shovel. The best part is that William Marshall portrays this role more seriously than one would anticipate. Scream, Blacula, Scream (1973) Director: Bob Kelljan Blacula rises again in this sequel to the 1972 film Blacula. Voodoo queen Mama Loa dies, and now someone has to take her place. Two words: Pam Grier. She’s a bad mother… shut your mouth (I’m only talking about Pam Grier). She is an icon of the blaxploitation genre and pops up in this film to play Lisa Fortier, Mama Loa’s successor. This does not sit right with Mama Loa’s son Willis Daniels (Richard Lawson), who feels that Lisa is taking his rightful place. You know how the saying goes, and Willis gets mad and even. He purchases Mamuwalde’s (William Marshall) bones (Why would anyone hold on to these, you ask? Well, in case of a sequel, of course.) and performs a ritual that raises the vampire from the dead. Scream, Blacula, Scream is camp overload from the cheesy camera movements to the pimps getting pimp slapped and then killed by Mamuwalde.

Used with permission from American International Pictures

Fright Night (1985) Director: Tom Holland In the opening scene of Fright Night, the audience and the main character Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) have something in common: both Charley and the audience are watching vampire films. Charley is a fan of the horror film genre (if he existed in 2011, he would most likely have created a “Fright Night” tumblr). He regularly watches “Fright Night,” a TV series that screens horror films. Things start to get ugly when his real life begins to resemble the films he watches on television. There is something not quite right about Charley’s neighbor Jerry Dandridge (Chris Sarandon), and when he uncovers that Jerry is a vampire, things begin to get out of hand. Since Fright Night is one of those movies where the police are useless, Charley recruits Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall), host of “Fright Night,” for his mission to take down Jerry and rescue his girlfriend Amy Peterson (Amanda Bearse). The camp in Fright Night comes from the slimy-looking special effects that are featured throughout the film. The Lost Boys (1987) Director: Joel Schumacher Michael Emerson (Jason Patric), his mother Lucy (Dianne Wiest), and his little brother Sam (Corey Haim) all move into a new town. Lucy is recovering from a divorce, so she decides that the family should move in with her father (Barnard Hughes) in Santa Carla, California. There is something different about this town, and with the help of some new friends, Sam figures out that the town is crawling with vampires. Meanwhile, older brother Michael meets Star (Jami Gertz), who runs with an interesting gang of friends who we will eventually discover are vampires. The crew of vampires led by David

(Kiefer Sutherland) are the ultimate badasses. The film goes to great lengths to let you know that these are the cool kids. David and his friends walk around the film strutting and posing like vampire rock stars (think Lestat meets The Sex Pistols). When Michael unknowingly gets turned, Sam and his friends, amateur vampire hunters The Frog Brothers (Corey Feldman and Jamison Newlander) must figure out a way to kill the head vampire. The camp in this film comes from the punchy dialogue like Sam’s reaction when he finds out his brother is now an undead bloodsucker or anything that comes out of the Frog Brothers’ mouths. The Lost Boys achieves an effortless balance of teen angst and comedy. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992) Director: Fran Rubel Kuzui For as long as there have been vampires there have been vampire hunters; Van Helsing, Blade and, of course, Buffy Summers. Buffy, played by Kristy Swanson, is the stereotypical popular high school cheerleader. This all changes when Buffy meets Merrick (Donald Sutherland), a man who informs her that she is the chosen one, the slayer. All of a sudden, she has the best (or worst) after-school job ever, and things like the school dance don’t seem as important. Buffy the Vampire Slayer was the inspiration for the television series of the same name (writer/director Joss Whedon is behind both the film and the TV series). The idea is that the cute blonde girl in a horror film does not disappear into a dark alley to die a horrible death by the hands of whatever monster is terrorizing the film (subverting gender norms and horror film clichés). It is fair to say that everything about this film is pure camp, everything from Buffy uttering lines like, “Right, I’m the chosen one, and I choose to be shopping,” to the title of the film itself.

readbuzz.com October 20 - 26, 2011

What’s my cat doing so high!

Some call it a slaughter, others call it a massacre Local filmmaker shows film at The Art Theater by Lyanne Alfaro

n the December of 2009, Adam Dreyfus, College of Media, had a vision as he sat in front of the television screen watching Motor Home Massacre. Dreyfus and his friends had a history of watching bad horror movies to pick out their deficiencies. His vision was to make his own horror flick. If subpar movies could make it into the local video store, he was certain he could too by making a horror film just as good, if not better. Today, Dreyfus is on the brink of releasing Slaughter Massacre, a horror film about a drunkdriving accident that prompts a group of high school girls to form a murder pact. The director of the movie says that his flick takes everything audiences know about horror films and “takes it to the extreme.” Now, you be the judge. Slaughter Massacre will make its debut on October 20 at 10 p.m. in The Art Theater in downtown, Champaign. In this interview, Dreyfus talks about the writing, filming and afterthoughts of his latest production. » buzz: What was the process for creating the plot like? Dreyfus: We kind of joked about making the movie earlier. In April, I wrote a quick outline. I wrote a half hour of the movie. I sent it to all my friends. I told them, “If I wrote this script, would

you guys want to do it?” They were all surprised but responded yes. From there, a lot of smaller details popped up. We brainstormed the most creative ways to kill the characters. » buzz: How did the brainstorming sessions work out? Dreyfus: Really well. The goal in the movie was to never kill two different people in the same way. I hate the movies where you think, “Oh, that guy got killed with a knife, and so did the next guy.” We thought of the most ironic and strange ways to kill people. I think it worked out really well. » buzz: What way did you decide was the best way to kill a person? Dreyfus: There is no good way to kill a person. There’s many. To find out what they are, you should see the movie. » buzz: How did you choose the actors and actresses for the movie? Dreyfus: I did not hold auditions. I came up with roles based around my friends. Some of them are actors, and some of them are not. I thought, “How can I play off who they are in real life but make them into extreme versions of who I perceive them to be?” The actors and actresses were my friends. The characters’ personalities were designed just for them. » buzz: What was your best experience on set? Dreyfus: One of the characters in the movie

was supposed to be someone’s dad. We had no one to play the dad because everyone is my age. I was looking desperately for an actor, and I found this guy who was in the army, and he was out in Germany at a training base and worked out there for years. I told him about the movie, and he said he would do it. We came around 1 a.m. to this film site — it was in the middle of the fields. He came out and told me he had not memorized his monologue. He took this two-page monologue and ended up improvising for about a half hour of a nonstop thirty-minute monologue. Everyone was trying not to laugh, but when we ended the take everyone just burst out laughing. It was ridiculous — the fact that it worked out. » buzz: How did you manage the film’s budget? Dreyfus: I did that all on my own. The goal was to shoot one hundred dollars. All the equipment was borrowed from a local university where I live in the south suburbs of Chicago. In terms of costumes, they were all bought at the thrift store. That was one of our big costs. The costumes were about 20 bucks for ten people. It was pretty good. About 50 bucks went into makeup because that is the most important part of the movie. In terms of where we shot, we were kind of there illegally. We used an abandoned lot that we decided to take over. We also shot the film at one location. Finan-

Used with permission from ABDK Productions

cially, it was not hard to stay on budget. It was easy to have spent more money and have done it more officially. We just tried to stay under the radar as much as possible. » buzz: Why should horror movie lovers watch this flick? Dreyfus: This is an homage to 80s grindhouse and slasher movies.

gore! gods! ancient myths about delta blues singers! Talking with horror author John Hornor Jacobs about his new book, Southern Gods by Nick Martin What if a song could drive you crazy? Killer music is one of the monsters in John Hornor Jacobs’ new genre-bending pulp, Southern Gods. In this horror/detective hybrid, Bull Durham is a WWII veteran hunting for clues surrounding a mysterious blues singer; he quickly learns that the swamps and backroads of 1950s Arkansas are a lot creepier than they appear at first glance. Jacobs’ book mixes action, style and researched myths that culminate in a fast pulp-y read. buzz talked to Jacobs about his book, zombies and what makes the South such a good space for horror. » buzz: How did you get the idea to mix Blues music with Lovecraftian Gods and the occult? John Hornor Jacobs: Well, first, I’m a musician, and I like the blues, and I wanted to write something that played with the concept of Robert Johnson making a deal for his soul at the crossroads. That’s the spawning factor for the mythology that surrounds bluesmen. Plus, the blues has an influence of Southern voo-

doo culture — like in Muddy Waters’s “I’ve Got My Mojohand.” Waters is referring to black magic, a mojo bag sold in voodoo shops. It’s a mixture of the Christian “Deal with the Devil” and Louisiana voodoo ... Then, I was reading an author named Manly Wade Wellman, a writer from North Carolina. He wrote a series of stories about a guy named Silver John — a traveling, ministerial folk musician who fought evil. The stories had a lot of Lovecraftian influence; John was always going up against Elder Gods or Awoken Gods or Druidic Gods. Wellman’s stories are pretty hard to find nowadays, but they’re unique because he wrote in a folk-y, North Carolinian dialect. My interest in blues and the influence of other writers helped me see things come together as something new. I think the fact that the book takes place in my home state helped define it, too. » buzz: Yeah, the setting makes it spooky. I think there’s something inherently scary about the American South. Movies like Deliverance and Texas Chainsaw Massacre start to get at that.

Maybe it’s the landscapes — the swamps and heat. What do you think? JHJ: Oh yeah, we’re coming off three months of 110-degree weather. It’s great six months of the year when it’s not summer, and don’t get me wrong — I love my state, but the mosquitoes are horrible, and there’s snakes everywhere. It’s also less populated in the South; everything’s a little decayed and decaying. Maybe at a more conceptual level, large parts of our population are scary ignorant. Seriously, we have the worst education systems in America — if it wasn’t for Mississippi and Alabama, Arkansas would be fiftieth on every list. Evil in the world isn’t nefarious supergeniuses plotting to overthrow the government; a lot of evil is just dumb people doing unkind, shallow, petty things. Racism is the first thing you think of — that stems from a total lack of knowledge about other people, the way they live and a disrespect for other cultures. And we’re poor. The South has a lot of poor people who are desperate and do a lot of bad things to get out of their situation. I think that’s scary.

Used with permission from Night Shade Books

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THIS WEEK

2011(OcT20)3qUARTER(bUzz)

KR ANNERT CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS

TH OCT 20

THESE SPONSORS MAKE GOOD STUFF HAPPEN:

5pm

Krannert Uncorked with Faye Ballard, ragtime piano // Marquee

National Acrobats of the People’s Republic of China

7pm

National Acrobats of the People’s Republic of China // Marquee

7:30pm

Cabaret

// Depar tment of Theatre

FR OCT 21

10am

Dance for People with Parkinson’s

7:30pm

Cabaret

// Marquee

// Depar tment of Theatre

SA OCT 22

7:30pm 7:30pm

Cabaret

// Depar tment of Theatre

Sinfonia da Camera: Dancing with the Devil // Sinfonia da Camera

Anonymous

SU OCT 23

2pm

Dessert and Conversation: Cabaret // Depar tment of Theatre

3pm

Cabaret

3pm

UI Wind Orchestra

// Depar tment of Theatre // School of Music

MO OCT 24

7:30pm

Ian Hobson Presents the Complete Solo Piano Works of Robert Schumann: Love Letters, Smith Memorial Hall, 805 S. Mathews, Urbana // School of Music

TH OCT 27

5pm

Krannert Uncorked

7:30pm

Battle of Angels

7:30pm

UI Wind Symphony

// Marquee

// Depar tment of Theatre // School of Music

C A L L 3 3 3 . 6 2 8 0 • 1. 8 0 0 . K C P A T I X

Corporate Power Train Team Engine

Marquee performances are supported in part by the Illinois Arts Council—a state agency which recognizes Krannert Center in its Partners in Excellence Program.

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40 North and Krannert Center —working together to put Champaign County’s culture on the map.

MUSIC

October 20 - 26, 2011

the217.com

Hey, you took my spot! Five points on standing-room etiquette at tha punk rawk show. by Adam Barnett

n average during the school year, I attend three concerts per month. This number increases pretty drastically during the summer, and still plenty of people go to more shows than I do. Also, most of these concerts and festivals are free because of my position in this magazine, and I understand that most people because of time, money or lack of interest can’t go to a concert more than once or twice a year. I get that. It’s cool; I think you’re still a good person. But lack of attendance sometimes results in a blatant ignorance toward proper concert mannerisms, mostly showcased in the standing room (also known as “the pit” or “general admission”). So here are five notes on standing room etiquette: Point #1 – “Personal Space and why it’s irrelevant:” You’re at a sold-out show, and everyone is packing together at the front. You still want at least a two-foot radius around you to stretch and clap your hands over your head without brushing against an icky stranger. Someone fills in the long gap between you and the person in front of you. That person is now closer to thatband-you-heard-on-the-radio-and-really-liked than you are! Do you get angry? Nope! If you like a band and care about proximity, you politely and unobtrusively fill in the gaps closer to the stage if they’re of a practical size. After carefully measuring (and you can test this yourself), an acceptable fill-able gap size is 1.5 feet in front of someone and 2 feet if filling in between shoulders. Note: These measurements are for common front-of-standing room situations with larger crowds. Shows that involve heavy amounts of pushing and moving can reduce the “bubble” distance to less than half a foot. Smaller crowds at

Saturday, October 22 Illinois Blues Challenge Hosted by the PCBS! First band starts at 3pm Come out for a full day of BLUES with seven bands fighting for a spot at Nationals. Enjoy some local BBQ provided by Holy Smokes Barbeque.

softer shows can generally grant more personal space. Point #2 – “The knight in 90% cotton armor:” Some guy with a muscle tee is crotch-to-butt behind his significantly smaller girlfriend at the bar behind the stage at a somewhat heavy concert (punk, hardcore, etc.). The crowd is getting rowdy — a pit forms towards the front. Muscleman creates a force field around his girlfriend with his arms and subsequently elbows, pushes or punches anyone who is pushed into or pushes him or his girlfriend — don’t be this douche, or take your girlfriend to see Dave Matthews Band. Point #3 – “Conga line: Girls first!” Just like it’s probably a lot easier to murder a puppy with some Conertgoers practice proper show etiquette at the Polyvinyl 15th anniversary show during this year's Pygmalion Music Festival. Photo by Sean O’Connor buddz around to take some of the guilt, it’s pretty easy to go front-of-standing-room Point #4 – “My beer cost just as much as my ticket:” ever, that’s not the case. I frequent plenty of shows spot-searching in a conga line of three or four Just because you bought enough PBR to double your around the “indie scene” (whatever that means), friends while weaving through passive aggressive concert-going costs doesn’t mean your beer gets and I can tell you with the utmost confidence that onlookers, who complain to their “buddz” after a spot. So stop spilling it on my shoes and lucky guys and girls at these shows definitely didn’t eat the show about those conga-lining douchebags concert-sweater, and actually get as wasted as you their vegetables as children either. Everyone is who invaded their two-foot bubble. Girls are al- intended. I would rather have you projectile vomit- short, so throw away that “pity me, I couldn’t ride ways at the front of the line to appease the tough ing all over the sidewalk outside after the show than Iron Wolf until a couple years ago” excuse, and reguys in the crowd. As long as boobs brush arms, have damp, sticky socks. I hate wet socks. member your windows. When moving around the “it’s cool, bra.” standing room, it’s always important to remember This ain’t no barmitzvah party, though, and Point #5 – “Windows:” I’m 5”7, and my doctors that the back of your head sucks in comparison conga lines went out of style with the “Locomo- tell me that I’m in the 28th percentile of height for to the vocalist’s washboard abs. Put your field of tion,” however I would let any group of four people young men my age, so it’s probably no shock to vision between two peoples’ shoulders, and make successfully recreating the “Bunny Hop” pass in you when I admit that I don’t think there are too sure the person behind you has the opportunity many people shorter than me at concerts. How- to do the same. front of me.

2010

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$3 32oz “Loose Tap Beer” | $4 Jager Barrels | $7 U-Call-It Rail Quart Jars

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Things are about to get ‘noisey’ Noisey College Tour brings Neon Indian and Kreayshawn to the Canopy Club for free by Maggie Labno he Noisey College Tour seems to really understand the “broke college student” problem. The tour is bringing indietronica group Neon Indian and Oakland rapper Kreayshawn to ten different campuses, UIUC included, with free admission to students. Sponsored by Dell and Intel with support from VICE Media, the tour begins on October 24 at the University of Iowa and ends two weeks later at Bowdoin College, in Brunswick, Maine. Champaign-Urbana’s own Canopy Club hosts Noisey on October 26. Noisey (as in Noisey.com), launched in March 2011, documents who they consider to be great up-and-coming musicians from numerous countries including the United States, France and China. The site is filled with videos of interviews and live performances from venues across the globe, providing exposure not only to artists but the featured music scenes. Neon Indian is the project of Alan Palomo, who recently released his sophomore LP Era Extraña almost two years after his equally successful debut Psychic Chasms. Neon Indian is credited for contributing to the development of the chillwave, glo-fi movement that his music represents. Era Extraña was written and recorded in Helsinki, Finland during Palomo’s time spent there alone. That isolation transcribes itself and becomes subtly evident in the record, especially when looking at the first single off Era Extraña, “Polish Girl.” The song, obviously influenced by a relationship, is

reminiscent to a journal entry sans names, dates and places. Palomo, however, wants the secrecy of the song to remain his. “I want to preserve the mystery behind who this person was and what the situation was. I like that I can sort of keep it as my own little story,” he said. Neon Indian is currently on tour until December promoting Era Extraña. The motto: “Expect the unexpected.” “We’ve always had people who jump on stage and start grinding on somebody, or something fairly ridiculous will happen, and we just have to roll with it,” Palomo said. “We like to be surprised a little bit by what sort of spontaneous act people will jump into when they hear a song like ‘Psychic Chasms’ or ‘Hex Girlfriend.’” Kreayshawn, on the other hand, sounds greatly dissimilar to Neon Indian. On top of all the internet and media buzz geared toward her this past summer, the 21-year-old female rapper scored a Best New Artist VMA nomination this year along with over 20 million hits on YouTube for her “Gucci Gucci” video. Although both Neon Indian and Kreayshawn are young musicians, the pairing of Neon Indian and Kreayshawn seems unusual. The two artists haven’t met before, and Neon Indian wasn’t notified that Kreayshawn would be coheadlining the tour until a few weeks after their agreement to perform. “I’m definitely going to honor the arrangement that I’ve already agreed to and play the

Photo by Dagny Piasecki. Used with permission from Neon Indian

show for the fans that want to come out,” Palomo explaind. “But it’s definitely pretty weird and, if anything, a little odd on their part that they didn’t choose to explain this to us until long after we agreed.” The Noisey College Tour will take place at the Canopy Club in Urbana at 9:00pm on Wednesday, October 26. Doors open at 8:00 p.m., and attendees must be 18 to enter. Students who RSVP online before October 25 get free admission with a valid student ID, while the general

Low-Cal Music Now with added Vitamin C! by Adam Barnett

appy 200th birthday, Franz Liszt! While we can’t get you a Nintendo Wii like we promised, we did manage to pool in and get you a concert to celebrate your bicentennial and all your contributions to the world of music (paving the way for the impressionist era, establishing what we now know as piano recitals — thanks, bud!). Ian Gindes, Tatiana Shustova, Kyu-Youn Sim and Aaron Jacobs, all musicians affiliated with the DMA program in the University’s music school are getting together to play selections like “Grand Duo Concertant” and “etude La Campanella” from Liszt’s very long repertoire. When: Saturday, Oct. 22 @ 4:00 p.m. Where: Temple Buell Architecture Gallery Cost: Adults - $6; Students and Seniors - $4; Children 12 and under – Free 8

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Helping other people is widely considered a good thing. When you’re helping people by attending a concert with a title equally as catchy as the music being played, that’s a definite plus for your morale. Rock for Wuqu Kawoq is a benefit show for nonprofit organization Wuqu Kawoq; the money collected is going toward aid for Mayan populations in Guatemala. The concert features locals Take Care, Midstress, Neoga Blacksmith and Cisco, Ill. hardcore group Man Made Blast. When: Saturday Oct. 22 @ 8:00 p.m. Where: Mike ‘N Molly’s Cost: $6 You know a band is cool when it’s having a record release show for its full-length being released on tape. Proggy hardcore instrumentalists

Dino Bravo are then, in fact, cool. Their “record” release show also brings in Wisconsin-based and awesomely heavy Maidens, sludge-y Lungs and local newcomer Hank. Oh, and the CU Collective will be selling tasty treats. Gotta love cassettes and treats. When: Sunday, Oct. 23 @ 9:00 p.m. Where: Red Star Liquors Cost: Donations It’s a night of musicians gone solo featuring Kevin Seconds from established No. Cal hardcore outfit 7SECONDS. Supporting him are locals Roberta Sparrow, Ryan McCoy of Midstress and Mark Wyman of Take Care. When: Monday, Oct. 24 @ 9:00 p.m. Where: Red Star Liquors Cost: $5

public can purchase tickets for $17 online or in person at the Canopy Club, Exile on Main Street and Manolo’s Pizza and Empanadas.

briefbox

Noisey College Tour Neon Indian and Kreayshawn Wednesday, October 26 @ 9:00 p.m. (Doors at 8) TICKETS: Free for students with student ID who RSVP online before Oct. 25; $17 for general public Ages: 18+

arts

entertainment

Go DJ

October 20 - 26, 2011

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Local DJ Miss Amphetamine Talks About Her Start in Music

by Andrea Baumgartner

ristina Jackson didn’t start DJing until she was a sophomore in college. In fact, she was a dedicated gymnast who played the cello and was into hardcore metal-rock until one day the spring break of her freshman year. “While I was home, one of my friends called me because he needed a ride back to his hometown. It turned out he had ditched some of my other friends at a concert the night before and went home with some girl,” she said. “And so I go and I meet this girl, and while we’re driving, she’s saying they hung out with DJs after the show, and they were saying how the Chicagoland area was in dire need of more female, Asian celebs and this girl is a Filipino like I am, and I remember looking in the rear view mirror and thinking, ‘I could be so much better than you at that.’” Jackson then had a friend from high school show her how to DJ, and then an older cousin taught her to spin on an old vinyl turntable. “I would mess around on my cousin’s vinyls and just start playing around,” Jackson said. “Eventually, I saved up enough money to buy my own console — it was the new iDJ. You just pop your iPod in. You get two little wheels and like 6 buttons to play, queue, loop in and out, individual pitch ...

I don’t know how I got started on that thing, but I did, and it took me a long way.” The next task was picking a name that had pizazz and would stand out amongst the others. Miss Amphetamine was actually born before her DJ days. While subbing for the bassist of her friends’ band, she learned a song called “Blue Dutchman,” a song about Adderall, a drug classified as an amphetamine. Later, she DJed a party for this same friend, mixed some electro music with “Blue Dutchman” and found her inspiration for a name. “Since I was partial to that song and partial to those friends, my name kind of reflects my background in the musical genre, and it also represents the group of friends that shaped me into the musician I am,” she explained. “It’s something energetic and intense and passionate, which is how I feel about DJing.” Getting started on the performance side of DJing, though, wasn’t as easy. Jackson started performing at house and apartment parties around U of I and didn’t hit the public venues until the summer of 2010. “I remember the first party I DJed at. The night before, I stayed in and just worked on my set. I was so excited. It was almost like the night before my first

ever gymnastics meet ... like ‘how is this going to go?’ ... but it was awesome,” she said. Canopy Club was her first big gig and since then has been her most consistent venue. “I don’t have a favorite place. I really liked High Dive when I was there, and I’d love to play there again, but I mostly play at Canopy Club because that’s where I started,” she said. “So I’m still trying to get in at other places because there’s a lot I want to try. But there’s nothing like going back to the one you’re used to.” It’s more than the chance to play in a public venue that keeps Jackson going back, though; it’s also the people she’s befriended along the way. “I found my own little group of misfits at Canopy, and now I’m friends with misfits who Canopy kicked out. But I’m just friends with everybody and that’s the best part. It’s a big community of love ... at least, that’s how it should be.”

Used with permission from Miss Amphetamine

Miss Amphetamine will be playing a Halloween-themed show at Cowboy Monkey on Oct. 28th (time TBA) and Canopy Club on Nov. 2nd at midnight. To check out her music, “like” Miss Amphetamine on Facebook and download the links to her Soundcloud.

WPGU

& 1 . 7 0 1

bring you

Frattle of the Bands III

Come out and watch this week’s bands rock it out Oct. 26 at KAM’S starting at 10 PM! Bands have a chance to win $1000 CASH as well as bragging rights around campus!

AMAZING DRINK SPECIALS ALL NIGHT LONG AT KAM’S:

$1.50 “Bud” U Call It Drafts and Bottles $2.50 Bacardi Drinks $3.50 Vodka and Bam

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Models, Music and More Victoria’s Secret’s Pink Nation brings Fighting Illini Fest to campus by Imani Brooks

ince the University of Illinois won the Victoria’s Secret Pink Nation Collegiate Showdown last spring, the Fighting Illini Fest has been teasing students with fickle date changes and withholding who the musical guest will be. But the time has finally come: the Fighting Illini Fest will be hosted from 5:00-9:00 p.m. this afternoon at Lot 31, located across from Memorial Stadium between First and Oak Street in Champaign. Victoria’s Secret models Chanel Iman and Elsa Hosk will host the free event, which includes carnival-style games with Pink prizes, a pop-up store supplying limited edition Pink gear and music by DJ Irie, 99 Jamz Miami radio station and former MTV Total Request Live DJ. Rap artist Kid Cudi was announced to perform along with the sample-based music of act Girl Talk, the project of Gregg Gillis, who performed his mash-up music at the Canopy Club last April. Illinois Pink fans kept up with the event’s details this summer through text message updates, following @illiniPINK, the university’s Victoria’s Secret Pink representatives on Twitter, and by keeping up with the event’s Facebook page. Keeping the event secretive, the Pink representatives persuaded followers into expecting a female artist through ambiguous text messages

and tweets. In a recent survey-monkey poll created about the event for university students and Pink fans, 79 percent of the 81 students who responded expected artists Katy Perry and Nicki Minaj to headline the Fighting Illini Fest. A senior in Dance and Community Health, Brazhal Brewer was anticipating artists Nicki Minaj, Katy Perry or rapper Drake, who performed during West Virginia University’s Pink Nation Collegiate Showdown festival last year. “I had no idea who Girl Talk was,” Brewer said. “I had to look them up on YouTube and see who they were and what their genre of music [was].” About 44 percent of the survey recipients have heard about Girl Talk, and only 6.2 percent expected him to perform. But while VS Pink fans may be unfamiliar with the solo act, Girl Talk’s performance gives an opportunity for more audiences to enjoy the event. Andrej Rosic, a junior in Computer Engineering and Girl Talk fan, heard about the VS Pink event prior to knowing the performance lineup, but was pleasantly surprised when finding out about Girl Talk, whose club-ready music mixes complement the event’s fun theme. “I figured they’d get some mid-upper popular DJ to perform,” Rosic said. “I did not get to see him

Used with Permission from Victoria’s Secret

last year, so I’m pretty excited to see Girl Talk.” The Fighting Illini Fest date was also a surprise for university students. VS Pink representatives did not reveal the initial event date until early September with the date and performance details being added last Tuesday. The new event updates reached students through the Facebook

and Twitter pages of Fighting Illini Fest a week before the event. “At first, I thought it was just a rumor that the date changed to have fewer people attend the event. Word of mouth travels fast,” Brewer said. “I wish they would have kept the date the same, but either way, we are still having the VS Pink party.”

finding the loophole How U of I really got Victoria’s Secret’s Pink Nation to come to campus by Andrea Baumgartner There was the battle for the Victoria’s Secret Pink party last spring — the Facebook groups, sitting in class waiting for the next voting period, checking the scores every few minutes and begging friends and family via Facebook statuses to vote. The anticipation of beating other colleges for rumored prizes, models, musical performers and other untold treasure was truly great. The final round came down to Virginia Tech and U of I. Students incessantly voted with victory in their grasp. Finally, the result: U of I taking the win with about 28,000 votes to 22,000. While most people dutifully waited every 24 hours to vote, some were more eager to see U of I win — so eager that a code was created to find a loophole in the system. A senior actuarial science major, wishing to remain anonymous, explained how a friend was 10

buzz

able to create a code that would allow voters to punch in more often. The source said that after the code had been passed to friends, and those friends passed it on to more friends, people who knew the code were able to vote at least 20 more times (depending on how dedicated they were) than someone without the code. “You copy and paste the code up into the address field, and it randomly generates characters to make up fake names, e-mail addresses, home addresses, birthdays, etc...” she said. “The Victoria’s Secret site didn’t have an e-mail verification, so there was no way of them being able to check if something like aszdfasdf@ gmail.com was a legit e-mail address.” The creator of the code gave the code to the anonymous source and many other friends in effort to give the U of I a winning edge over other competition.

Image used on Purdue's Facebook page in March 2011

The idea came from Purdue’s own Pink Facebook group that explained how people could vote. One post suggested making a Gmail account with your name, then changing around the placement of a period so you could make an infinite amount of accounts on the website without having to make up a ton of fake e-mails. “I don’t think it’s cheating,” said the source. “We’re not dumb, and there were no real rules regarding how many addresses we could have per computer. We just had to copy and paste a code, while everyone else was manually typing in different names and stuff, which takes longer.” Wether or not using the code to vote broke the rules, some find the result a testament to the hard work and ingenuity of fellow students. “I think our school had the most dedicated voters throughout the competition... vote early, vote often.”

readbuzz.com October 20 - 26, 2011

Write it like a play bro.

Panties in a bunCH The pros and cons of the Victoria’s Secret Takeover Ellie Brzezenski

ctober 20 is here, and the anticipation that has been building for over six months will finally come to an end: Victoria’s Secret will be invading our campus to bring us a free concert, free stuff and maybe even a model! There was a frenzy across campus last semester as students competed to rake in as many votes as possible and beat out the other competing schools; I remember having class interrupted last spring so a female student could show us all how to beat the system and vote multiple times a day. Though slightly hysterical, our efforts have paid off, and we are ready to receive our well-earned PINK Party. However, as more publicity is given to this event and our school as a whole, we must consider both its negative and positive implications. In the last couple of months, our school and no doubt our Facebook pages have been inundated with images of Victoria’s Secret models, images that clearly do not represent the typical female body. Most of the time, these women are wearing only underwear, potentially implanting the idea that women must always look like these images or wear sexy underwear to attract a man. There is a worry that too much attention

on female bodies in the Victoria’s Secret Takeover could have negative repercussions on the female population of campus. Ian Davis, PhD candidate and Advertising instructor here at the University, said, “The dominant concern, of course, is that there is an unrealistic portrayal of female beauty or moreover an unhealthy portrayal of female beauty that emphasizes size zero and double zero. This creates a culture of unhealthy eating practices or not eating practices, and — this is a part that is often neglected — women’s self-perception may be [altered] by the emphasis on thinness, the emphasis on having a certain type of body.” However, some women are not focused on the message Victoria’s Secret seems to send, instead appreciating the positive outcomes this contest has provided. Laura Sheehan, a promoter for the event last spring, said, “I think it’s fun that they are promoting school spirit and creating styles and clothes for women that are flattering and promote the Illini. I still don’t agree with the size of the VS models, but that’s not in my control. However, this PINK competition and party has brought a lot of promotion

Used with permission from Wonderlane and the Creative Commons

for PINK not only to our campus but also a lot of publicity to the University as a whole.” In an anonymous survey I conducted of sorority women across campus, votes were nearly perfectly split between whether they thought the PINK campaign was overall positive or negative in terms of representing women. Clearly, it is an

issue that has many sides with many different factors to consider. While I do appreciate this upcoming party and encourage as many people to attend as possible, I think that it is important to also note the differences between media portrayals of women and women in reality. Not just in terms of this PINK party, but in terms of all media.

Dr. J. Barry Howell, Buzz & The Champaign Urbana Theatre Company Presents

RICHARD O’BRIEN’S

Saturday, October 22, 2011 at The Canopy Club

A whole day dedicated to Rocky Horror! Gleeked Concert 6-7 pm One hour concert of the music of Rocky Horror Doors-5 pm Cost: $10 This show is for 17 & under; and must be accompanied by a parent or guardian

Rocky Horror Show in Concert 2 Doors: 8:30 pm Show 9:30 pm Movie to follow Cost: $15 For both in concert and movie!

This performance is a fundraising event for the Champaign Urbana Theatre Company. Tickets are available now at: The Canopy Club, Exile on Main Street, Manolo’s Pizza & Empanadas, CUTC ofﬁce Online at www.canopyclub.com, or By phone at 1-800-514-ETIX

1. (It’s just a) JUMP TO THE LEFT, with hands UP. 2. STEP TO THE RIGHT (Time-Warper WHITNEY HAVICE suggests a very wide step.) 3. *(With your hands on your HIPS) YOU BRING YOUR KNEES IN TIGHT. 4. (Then) THE PELVIC THRUST (if repeated FIVE times, it nearly drives you insa-a-ane) 5. HIPSWIVEL (if not driven insa-a-ane by step four) 6. LET’S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!

* Those with Limb DISABILITIES may ﬁnd it necessary to ALTER or DELETE this

action, but NO EXCUSES for alterations to steps four and ﬁve.

For more info visit www.cutc.org buzz

WHAT’S YOUR SIGN?

And other forms of public identification

by Karolina Zapal

ave you ever read a horoscope that was so incredibly untrue that you wanted to find the writer and kick him in his star-reading ass? How about one that was true, deserving your full attention and a space on your poster-ridden bedroom wall? I have been in both situations, just like so many of you, my dear readers. My most memorable horoscope “OMG moment” happened the summer after my freshman year of high school. I was on vacation in Poland and was barely holding on to a long-distance relationship. I read a horoscope that said I was going to go through a terrible break-up in July but meet someone very special in August. Now, if he didn’t break up with me, there would be no point to this story — so guess what? Yes, we broke up, and I was devastated. About a month or so after that, I met my best friend, and we started dating. Horoscopes can be frighteningly accurate, but do our signs define us? There are too many personality/sign linkages to completely falsify the idea that yes, in fact, they do define us. The general view of my sign, Capricorn, states that people born of this sign are quiet, hardworking

and serious individuals, which is exactly what I am. I know other Capricorns that have almost the same outlook on life as I do — coincidence? How do we deal with this “imprisonment” without being walking, talking, breathing Leos and Libras? A lot of people just decide to ignore astrology completely; they want nothing to do with it. Others believe in it so religiously that they plan their pregnancies according to the alignment of planetary objects—crazy? Then there are the people like me, who believe in horoscopes when they’re true and discard them when they’re untrue, which is a really wacky way to deal with the situation. It’s a win-win outcome every time. There are other popular forms of identification, one that’s especially associated with the University of Illinois: the UIN or University Identification Number. This brings me back to junior year, when my English teacher would count the number of heads in class and repeat, “You’re a name, not just a number.” I don’t know how many of us actually took his counting personally, but the statement always left a warm-winded response in my mind: at least he cares. At least we’re personalities, not just miniscule parts of the populace.

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Used with permission from Monika Thorpe and the Creative Commons

We’re born with a sign and acquire many more identifications as we grow older. We spend our whole lives either trying to fit into the tiny per-

sonality space they have allowed us or do everything in our power to defy these boundaries and be unique.

Food

Drink

October 20 - 26, 2011

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D.I.Y-ine Night: Time to Uncork! Tuesday’s not the only night you can get your grape on! by Stacey Klouda

ould you like to unwind a little with the roomies after a week of papers, exams and stress? Well, just uncork! Some wine bottles, that is. Having a bottle or two on hand and a few other tidbits is a perfect way to relax, get closer to people around you and indulge yourself a little on those rough days, special occasions or just ‘cause. In order to help you get your grape on, here’s a little crash course on wine so you can find a wine that works and some things to try alongside it. First off, a low-key BYOW is a great way to get comfortable with vino itself and a couple of friends. Wine is perfect for the college student who loves to get wild but doesn’t want to be labeled an alcoholic after graduation when it’s no longer acceptable to pound shots or shotgun Keystone (shocking, I know). Not to mention the fact that wine has beer and vodka beat in the health department — wine (especially red) helps protect you against all sorts of cancers and heart disease! So drink up... responsibly and legally, of course. Whether you love it or hate it, there’s something special about wine — its seemingly endless and esoteric flavors, its ability to change and enhance foods we eat with it and its, well, varying effects on us all. After studying abroad in one of the biggest wine-producing regions in the world, I learned to appreciate it in all its craziness. Now, there’s a lot of literature out there on wine and wine pairings, but don’t be stressed if you don’t “detect oaky, floral notes with a hint of cherry in your glass.” Wine gets a bad rap for being snooty and

A fresh take

way too expensive, but my buddies from Verona can attest to the fact that it only takes a few basic guidelines (not a million dollars) to help you enjoy yourself with wine. According to Men’s Health magazine, warm up to your wine — both red and white wine are best served room temp as a chill can hide bad wine and mask the flavors of good ones, but whites can still definitely be chilled if you prefer. Also, let your bottle breathe (open it up a few hours before you drink it), as this smooths out the bite some wines have and helps brings out those fruity or spicy notes or whatever it says on their labels. When you’re going to drink it, smell it a little bit and take smaller sips instead of gulps, and you just might find that you like the stuff — and that you’re a grown-up! Just a few other tips and tricks » Stay away from close-to-the-counter, flashylabeled, cutesy animals or red/yellow labeled bottles — these are all marketing tricks that are designed to sell bottles to dummies. Don’t get me wrong. I love a good label, but just don’t be surprised if it tastes as bad as it looks good. » Whites tend to go down easier for wine newbies, so stick to lighter-colored vintages and work your way up to reds. » Sample as many wines as you can so that you can find which type you like best — have a few friends each bring over a bottle and play musical glasses. The next step is throwing together a few quick and easy bites to compliment the wine you’ve got-

Used with permission from thezartorialist.com and the Creative Commons

ten. Stick to a mixture of A) something crunchy or crisp, B) something creamy or cheesy, and C) something fruity and/or meaty. For example, if you like a classic Pinot Grigio, try some crusty bread, herbed goat cheese and grapes. Just think about what bread or crackers you have, what cheese or fruit looks good that day (maybe some summer sausage or other meat for red wines), and let the label descriptions be your guide. Mix and match to your heart’s content — this isn’t the rocket science that wine snobs make it out to be. So, next time that you can’t make it out to

Cly’s, you’re reminiscing about euro-adventures, or you’re just feeling something different for tonight, know a do-it-yourself wine night is easy, inexpensive and fun. Get out there, uncork, and be merry already! Check out some awesome local wine and cheese sites for a taste of Champaign, and support our community and its agriculture! http://www.illinoiswine.org/, http://www.altovineyards.net/, http://www.prairiefruits.com/

New food preservative, bisin, could change grocery shopping forever

by Noah Roberts Imagine, if you will, consuming a pre-made packaged sandwich weeks after it came off the deli counter, never refrigerating a piece of produce ever again, or purchasing a gallon of milk and polishing it off 2 months later. Does it seem inconceivable? This is the sort of future imagined by University of Minnesota microbiologist Dan O’Sullivan. And with his recent discovery of bisin, it may be a future not far off in the distance. Certainly a food preservative with this sort of potential must possess some pretty scary chemical properties; but in the case of bisin, it simply is not so. Bisin is a lantibiotic, an antibacterial peptide. It is produced from a culture of Bifidobacterium longum, a bacteria abundant in the human intestines. No artificially synthesized compounds here; this is as natural as it gets. Bisin is similar to nisin, another lantibiotic already widely used as a food preservative that is capable of preventing Gram-positive bacterial growth and extending shelf life. The important differentiation is that Bisin is the first preserva-

tive capable of preventing gram-positive AND gram-negative bacterial growth such as E. Coli, salmonella, and listeria. Within the U.S. alone, E. coli and salmonella are responsible for $1.4 billion in food recalls and 28% of the 3,000 deaths from foodborne illnesses annually. As you can be certain to find with any “too good to be true” innovation, critical speculation is high. And rightly so: Just because a three-week-old sandwich is “safe” to eat, is it good? How will this emerging class of super-preservatives redefine the word “fresh” as we know it? On the other side of the coin, the positive potential of bisin cannot be ignored. A reduced carbon footprint would result from the decreased need for refrigeration, an age-old method of slowing the kind of bacterial growth that bisin could prevent. Food waste would be significantly lowered in homes and businesses due to extended expiration dates. Perhaps most importantly, the incorporation of Bisin could drastically reduce food borne illnesses and deaths, particularly in developing nations with much less stringent regulation than the U.S.

Used with permission from avlxyz and the Creative Commons

Speculation is easy, but sound research must be pursued. In America, the FSIS and FDA require exhaustive testing to ensure the safety of all food ad-

ditives. Time will tell whether bisin was just another hot headline or truly the next “best thing since sliced bread”... everlasting, never-spoiling sliced bread. buzz

Venice Gas House Trolley

The Bread company

Oct. 22nd

2 to 4pm – Drum and Spoken Word Workshop (FREE) 8:30pm – Concert ($8)

Venice Gas House Trolley (Madison, WI) grooves body and mind creating a unique and organic live music experience.

Indi Go Artist Co-Op

9 E. University Ave.

Champaign, IL 61820

Sandwich and salad at The Bread Company. Photo by Jasmine Lee

buzz reviews an Urbana staple by Jasmine Lee

THE MT10

Urbana

buzz

ituated next to Espresso Royale on Goodwin Avenue and Oregon Street in Urbana is The Bread Company, an eclectic, European-style bakery that turns into a deli at lunchtime and then into a gourmet restaurant in the evening. Twentyfive-plus years ago, it began as a simple motherand-children bakery that sold homemade bread at Urbana’s farmers’ market; this eventually evolved into the bakery-slash-deli-slash-restaurant it is now. The manager, Daniel Wyczolkowski, cheerfully explains that The Bread Company “thrives on variety.” He describes the menu as a co-mingling of all the flavors of Mont Blanc, referring to “the tallest mountain in the European Alps, which spans Switzerland, France and Italy, and that’s our type of cuisine.” The owner herself is from Switzerland, and the fondue, done classically with gruyere and emmental cheeses, is “the real novelty here,” both in the restaurant and in Champaign-Urbana. Recently, in an attempt to “meet the eclectic and diverse tastes of the community,” the restaurant’s come out with a vegan menu. And on Sundays, the Company offers brunch, serving omelets, quiche, and both savory and sweet crepes alongside their regular dinner menu. Wyczolkowski quips that “if you wake up on a Sunday morning and you’ve got a craving for pizza, you can come in here and get a crepe and pizza if you want — anything you desire.” I ate at The Bread Company once by myself for lunch and once with a group of friends for an early dinner. For lunch, I ordered half a grilled turkey sandwich and half a house salad for around $10. I placed the order at one end of the curved wooden counter, painted a dark green, and then traipsed over to the other side, bypassing an enticing display of pastries, chips and wine, to pay my bill. Rustic is the key word for design; wooden tables, mismatched chairs, two lazily spinning ceiling fans and wine bottles aesthetically lining the windows. Half the walls are sherbet green, and the other half are muted orange, decorated with abstract paintings. The back of the main seating area opens up into a separate room, which accommodates more patrons or special events.

Chalkboards are scattered around the space, scrawled with the day’s specials, offerings of wine and espresso drinks, and a listing of breads. Now to discuss lunch: the sandwich was amazing — buttery, toasted sourdough stuffed with shredded pieces of grilled turkey, pesto, melted gruyere cheese and tomato. The turkey tasted like bacon, and the pesto was garlicky goodness. The salad, on the other hand, was an uninspiring mess of limp greens, soggy tomatoes and a dressing that was more oil than vinaigrette; I gave up after three bites. At the end of the meal, I cleared my own table. Dinner, however, was a delicious, two-hour affair. The restaurant itself dons an almost sultry attitude with dimmed lights, tables covered in white tablecloths and flickering candles. There doesn’t seem to be a dress code — I saw patrons wearing everything from shorts and a tee-shirt to slacks and a buttonup. Things I ordered for a group of four (girls): half a pitcher of sangria, artichoke bruschetta, garlic pizza, roasted potatoes, warm spinach salad, classic cheese fondue, and duck pâté with truffle. The bill came out to around $88, which I thought was reasonable, considering all four of us left absolutely stuffed, and it included the pitcher of sangria, which had doled out about 12-14 boozy, delicious cups. The pizza and fondue were the greatest disappointments; the “garlic” pizza was a glorified cheese pizza that teasingly smelled of garlic, and the fondue was stringy, congealed and came with an assortment of very dry hunks of bread. I was pleasantly surprised at the pâté — salty triangles of whipped duck liver to be spread out onto pieces of toasted bread and topped with mixed greens. But my favorites were the bruschetta – enormous buttery slices of sourdough generously topped with artichokes, tomato and mozzarella – roasted potatoes slathered with creamy crème fraiche and topped with thick slices of green onion, and the spinach salad – sautéed spinach leaves drizzled with a warm sun-dried tomato dressing, slices of pancetta and sliced eggs. Dinner was far tastier than lunch, and I am dying to try out more of the menu, especially the baked goat cheese, the roasted garlic bulbs and the cappuccino mousse.

CALENDAR

OCTOBER 20 - 26, 2011

Complete listing available at

THE217.COM/CALENDAR

SUBMIT YOUR EVENT TO THE CALENDAR: Online: forms available at the217.com/calendar • E-mail: send your notice to calendar@the217.com • Fax: 337-8328, addressed to the217 calendar Snail mail: send printed materials via U.S. Mail to: the217 calendar, Illini Media, 512 E. Green St., Champaign, IL 61820 • Call: 531-1456 if you have a question or to leave a message about your event.

THURSDAY 20 live music Jess Francis and Andy McDowell The Clark Bar, C, 6:30pm Sudden Sound Concert Series: Aakash Mittal Quartet Krannert Art Museum and Kinkead Pavilion, C, 7:30pm Chillax Radio Maria, C, 9pm Ole #7 Rosebowl Tavern, Ltd., U, 9pm

dj DJ BJ Dance Night Po’ Boys, U, 8pm DJ Ollie & DJ Hot Saus Highdive, C, 10pm

karaoke Bentley’s Thursday Night Karaoke Bentley’s Pub, C, 3pm Liquid Courage Karaoke Memphis on Main, C, 9pm RockStarz Karaoke: Presented by 3L Entertainment Bentley’s Pub, C, 10pm

movies October’s Global Lens Film: A Useful Life University YMCA, C, 5:30pm

stage God of Carnage The Station Theatre, U, 8pm, $10-$15 Open Stage at Red Herring Red Herring Coffeehouse, U, 9pm

art exhibit

campus activities

concert

fundraisers

Weekday Orthodox Minyan and Breakfast The Hillel Foundation: The Margie K. and Louis N. Cohen Center for Jewish Life, C, 7:30am

Congo Week: Breaking the Silence - Congolese Choir University YMCA, C, 7pm

Church Garage Sale Savoy United Methodist Church, C, 4pm SWANN Benefit Opening Reception Indi Go Artist Co-op, C, 7pm

karaoke

Yarn ‘n Yak Rantoul Public Library, Rantoul, 7pm

DJ Bange Karaoke Phoenix, C, 9pm Dragon Karaoke with Paul Faber The Clark Bar, C, 10pm

kids and families

stage

Preschool Story Time Rantoul Public Library, Rantoul, 10am

God of Carnage The Station Theatre, U, 8pm, $10-$15 Central Illinois Magic Association Magic Showcase Sodo Theatre, C, 10:00 pm, $5

fashion

community Coffee Hours University YMCA, C, 7:30pm

fundraisers Church Garage Sale Savoy United Methodist Church, C, 4pm

FRIDAY 21 live music ‘Appy Hour Silvercreek, U, 5:30pm, $2-$10 FREE Happy Hour Show! Memphis on Main, C, 6pm Monkey Town The Clark Bar, C, 6:30pm Congo Week: Congolese Choir Performs University YMCA, C, 7pm Feudin’ Hillbillys! Memphis on Main, C, 8:30pm Goth Industrial with Alex and Andrew The Clark Bar, C, 10pm Green Room Rockers Cowboy Monkey, C, 10pm, $5

DJ Tommy Williams Watercolors, Photos and Chester Street, C, 9pm Drawings by Michael DJ Delayney Fuerst Highdive, C, 10pm 133 W Main, U, DJ Cal Emmerich 8am Boltini Lounge, C, 10pm Art @ the Y presents DJ Belly ‘Waveland: A MeditaRadio Maria, C, 10pm tion’ dance music University YMCA, C, 9am Urbana Country Dancers Strands Contra Dance Cinema Gallery, U, Phillips Recreation Center, 10am U, 8pm, $4-5

lectures Collegiate Learning and Early Labor Market Outcomes: Findings from the Academically Adrift Study University YMCA, C, 12pm 2nd Annual Joan Friedman Lecture in Book History U of I Main Library, U, 5pm

recreation Gates of Delirium Haunted Attraction Downtown Gilman, G, 7pm, $9 Open Gym Volleyball Champaign County Brookens Administration Center, U, 5:30pm, $1

game-playing Chess Club Rantoul Public Library, Rantoul, 3:30pm

literary Zionist Food for Thought The Hillel Foundation: The Margie K. and Louis N. Cohen Center for Jewish Life, C, 12pm Michael Kleen Book Signing Barnes & Noble Booksellers, C, 7pm

social issues Isra-ed Weekly Session Cafe Sababa, C, 12pm

miscellaneous International Coffeehouse Etc. Coffee House, U, 4pm

Unkle Johnny Band at Boomerang’s Bar and Grill Boomerang’s Bar and Grill, U, 9pm Decadents at the Sidney Saloon Sidney Saloon, Sidney, 9pm

literary

stage

MONDAY 24

U of I Alumni/Urbana Native Novel Signing Jane Addams Book Shop, C, 1pm Douglas B. Carlyle Book Signing Jane Addams Book Shop, C, 1pm

Drag Show Chester Street, C, 10pm, $4

live music

kids and families

recreation

Kids@Krannert Krannert Art Museum and Kinkead Pavilion, C, 10am Kids Yoga Amara Yoga & Arts, U, 10:30am Kids Arts & Crafts Playshops Amara Yoga & Arts, U, 11:15am

Gates of Delirium Haunted Attraction Downtown Gilman, Gilman, 7pm, $9 Ghost Hunting Sodo Theater, C, 10:30pm, $5

Social Club Saturday Highdive, C, 9pm DJ Dif-EQ classes and Red Star Liquors, U, workshops 9pm Living Letter Press DJ Randall Ellison Opening Chester Street, C, Dixon Graphics, C, 5pm 9pm, $3 Curls Night Out DJ - Presented by 3L Ippatsu Hair Salon, C, 6pm Entertainment D.R. Diggers, C, food and drink 9:30pm Half Price Happy Hour Goth Night Emerald City Lounge, C, The Clark Bar, C, 5pm 10pm Wine Tasting DJ Space Police Wines at the Pines, U, Boltini Lounge, C, 5pm 10pm

SATURDAY 22

dance music

live music

Salsa Night with DJ Dr. J Radio Maria, C, 10pm

Big Bluestem Curtis Orchard, C, 12pm Illinois Blues Challenge hosted by the Prairie Crossroads Blues Society Memphis on Main, C, 2:30pm MPH The Clark Bar, C, 6:30pm Hot Slugs at Wines at the Pines Wines at the Pines, U, 7pm Blaze Foley: Duct Tape Messiah Highdive, C, 7pm Live Jazz with Panache Jim Gould Restaurant, C, 7pm Hard rock show featuring C.P.X., GRIM and Behind the Veil Phoenix, C, 8pm, $5 Venice Gas House Trolley Concert Indi Go Artist Co-op, C, 8:30pm, $8 Terry Quiett Band Memphis on Main, C, 9pm New Riders of the Golden Maize Rosebowl Tavern, Ltd., U, 9pm

concert Rock for Wuqu’ Kawoq Mike ‘n Molly’s, C, 7:30pm, $6

movies PSYCHO- Screening & Discussion (CU Film Society) The Art Theater, C, 12pm, $5

stage God of Carnage The Station Theatre, U, 8pm, $10-$15

holidays Haunted Tea Party Sodo Theater, C, 10:30pm, $5

art exhibit The Affordable Arts Show Kane & Co. Salon and Spa, C, 5pm

recreation Soccer Planet Open House Soccer Planet, 1pm

community Market at the Square Lincoln Square Mall, U, 7am

fundraisers A Century of Connecting and Collecting Spurlock Museum, U, 5pm, $75

classes and workshops

art exhibit Short Art Exhibit “Daily Terror: Cluster Bombs” University YMCA, C, 11am

campus activities M and M: Midrash and Meal The Hillel Foundation: The Margie K. and Louis N. Cohen Center for Jewish Life, C, 6pm

game-playing Trivia Night The Blind Pig Brewery, C, 7pm Big Dave’s Trivia Cowboy Monkey, C, 7pm

literary

Book Club Venice Gas House Rantoul Public Library, Trolley- Percussion and Rantoul, Spoken Word Workshop 2pm Indi Go Artist Co-op, C, fundraisers 2pm SWANN Benefit Opening food and drink Reception Sensational Saturday Indi Go Artist Co-op, C, Tasting 1pm Sun Singer Wine & Spirits, classes and C, 12pm workshops Half Price Happy Hour Emerald City Lounge, C, West African Dance 5pm Class with Djibril Camara Channing-Murray FounSUNDAY 23 dation, U, 6pm, live music $10-12 Live Jazz with Panache food and drink Jim Gould Restaurant, C, 7pm Champagne Brunch with Denny K a Diva! Curtis Orchard, C, 12pm Emerald City Lounge, C, Los Straitjackets Rock-N- 10am, Burlesque Spectacular $12 Highdive, C, 8pm Sandy’s Bagel Brunch and Games open mic The Hillel Foundation: The Open Mic Nite Margie K. and Louis N. CoPhoenix, C, hen Center for Jewish Life, 7pm C, 11am

One Dollar Wild Mondays Canopy Club, U, 10pm

dj DJ Randall Ellison Chester Street, C, 9pm, $2 Eletro/Industrial Night Chester Street, C, 9pm, $2 80’s Night with DJ Mingram Highdive, C, 10pm

karaoke RockStarz Karaoke: Presented by 3L Entertainment Mike ‘n Molly’s, C, 10pm

stage Monday Night Comedy Illini Union, U, 7pm Abe Froman Project Monday Night Improv Mike ‘n Molly’s, C, 9pm

art MELD: Monday Evening Life Drawing group McGown Photography, C, 7pm, $7

lectures Seminar on Religion and War Wesley-United Methodist Church & Wesley Foundation, U, 7pm

campus activities Nutrition Walk In La Casa Cultural Latina, U, 5pm

game-playing Trivia Night Bentley’s Pub, C, 7:30pm

TUESDAY 25 live music Keith Harden Silvercreek, U, 5:30pm Dueling Guitars Jupiter’s II, C, 8pm The Piano Man Canopy Club, U, 9pm

karaoke Dragon Karaoke with Paul Faber The Clark Bar, C, 10pm

buzz

RockStarz Karaoke Bentley’s Pub, C, 10pm Rockstarz Karaoke Chester Street, C, 1 0pm

open mic

Wompdown Wednesdays: Chalice Mug Night Canopy Club, U, 9pm, $1 I Love The ‘90s with DJ Mingram Soma Ultralounge, C, 10pm

Open Mic Night Cowboy Monkey, C, 10pm

dance music

movies

karaoke

Israeli Movie Club The Hillel Foundation: The Margie K. and Louis N. Cohen Center for Jewish Life, C, 7pm

RockStarz Karaoke: Presented by 3L Entertainment Senator’s Bar & Grill, Savoy, 9pm

campus activities

open mic

Revive, Restore, Relax: Weston Wellness Weston Residence Hall, C, 3pm

Open mic night Samuel Music, C, 5pm Open Mic Comedy Night Memphis on Main, C, 9pm Open Mic Nite Phoenix, C, 9pm

game-playing Trivia Tuesdays Memphis on Main, C, 7pm

lgbt Rainbow Coffeehouse Etc. Coffee House, U, 6pm Man UP The Up Center, U, 7pm

classes and workshops Real Computing Help Douglass Branch Library, C, 6pm Just Text Me: Exploring Technology and Relationships Illini Union, U, 7pm

food and drink Wine Night Radio Maria, C, 4pm

Wednesday 26 live music Donnie Heitler Solo Piano Great Impasta, U, 6pm Jeff Arigo The Clark Bar, C, 6:30pm The Hot Iron String Band The Clark Bar, C, 6:30pm Open Deck Night Radio Maria, C, 9pm

Salsa Dancing Cowboy Monkey, C, 10pm

stage A Chorus Line Champaign Central High School, C, 2:30pm, $7-10 Dead Man’s Cell Phone by Sarah Ruhl Parkland College Theatre, C, 7:30pm 3rd Annual Early Halloween Comedy Party Memphis on Main, C, 8:30pm

lectures Meet the Pros! Featuring Kurt Bielema Parkland College, C, 12pm School of Art + Design Visitors Series Krannert Art Museum and Kinkead Pavilion, C, 5:30pm

environmental issues Students for Environmental Concerns University YMCA, C, 6:30pm

kids and families Storyshop at the Branch Douglass Branch Library, C, 10:30am

miscellaneous

DJ Tommy Williams Chester Street, C, 9pm, $2 Coyote Ugly Night with DJ Stifler Highdive, C, 9pm DJ Randall Ellison Boltini Lounge, C, 9pm

Cafe Ivrit Espresso Royale, U, 7pm

buzz

classes and workshops Tango Quick Start Class Channing-Murray Foundation, U, 6pm, $25

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employment

HELP WANTED

030

Full/Part time

Head Resident Advisor Bromley Hall is now accepting applications for this position for the Academic Year 2012-13. Remuneration includes apartment, meals, parking and a competitive salary. Previous Residence Life experience required (RA, Student Government Rep., etc.), previous supervisory experience helpful. Please mail, fax or e-mail cover letter and resume to Human Resources, Bromley Hall, 910 S. Third, Champaign, IL 61820, fax 384-6119, or e-mail hrdirector@bromleygroup.com.

BUSINESS OPPS

050

$1000-3200/month to drive new cars with ads. www.FreeCarJobs.com

merchandise

CLOTHING

230

T-SHIRTS

Screen Printing, Embroidery, and Graphics on almost anything. Great rates & FREE Estimates. Greek Apparel! 217-344-9833.

FOR RENT

rentals

APARTMENTS

Furnished/Unfurnished

410

2 Bedroom Available Fall 2011 Campus, some utilities From $700. 217-367-6626.

PRICES SLASHED!!! AVAILABLE NOW 1 Bedrooms

Rents From:

135 W. Clark, C 1107 S. Euclid, C

$500/mo $420/mo

2 Bedrooms Linksview, S 1901 Karen, C 1405 W. Kirby, C

APARTMENTS

420 APARTMENTS

Furnished

420 APARTMENTS

Furnished

307, 310 E. White 307, 309 E. Clark

Convenient to Campus

2, 3, and 4 BR's. www.robsapartments.com

509 E. White

Studio & 1 Bedroom One block from Engineering Quad On major bus lines Starting @ $395/month universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

506 E. Stoughton

Large Studios Located one block from Engineering Quad New kitchens Starting @ $395/month universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

509 E. Stoughton

Huge Studio & 2 Bedrooms New Kitchens Located one block from Engineering Quad Starting @ $348/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

Huge studios located behind County Market Located on major bus lines New kitchens Starting @ $385/month universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

306, 308, 309 E. White

Large Studio, 1, 2, & 3 Located behind County Market On major bus lines Starting @ $265/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

Gregory Towers

4 & 5 Bedroom Townhouses Conveniently Located @ Fourth & Gregory Wood Floors, ﬂat screen TV, leather furniture Starting @ $376/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

207, 211 E. John

705 W. Stoughton (U)

Newly remodeled 2 & 3 Bedrooms Washer/Dryer in unit, large living room and balconies Starting @ $242/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

1005 S. Second

Large Studios with Balconies Secure building with large, clean laundry room Starting @ $395/month universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

2, 3, & 4 Bedrooms Located at 3rd & John Leather furniture, ﬂat screen TV Starting @ $420/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

111 E. Chalmers

Studio, 1, & 4 Bedrooms New kitchens, leather furniture, ﬂat screen TV, walk-in closets, large balconies Starting @ $345/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

602 E. Stoughton

Large 1 & 2 Bedrooms Located one block from Engineering Quad universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

203 S. Sixth

4 Bedroom/ 2 Full Bath Located one block from Engineering Quad Starting @ $248/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

307, 309 E. Healey

2 & 3 Bedroom/2 Full Bath New kitchens, large bedrooms Close to 4th & Green, behind IHOP Starting @ $360/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

1005 S. Second

4 Bedroom Rooftop Penthouse Hardwood ﬂoor, ﬂat screen TV, leather furniture Starting @ $375/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

106 E. Daniel

1, 2, & 4 Bedrooms New Kitchens, leather furniture, ﬂat screen TV On the 22 bus line Starting @ $360/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

207 S. Wright

Large, Newly Remodeled 1 Bedrooms Hardwood ﬂoors, Free parking Located on the corner of Wright & White universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

APARTMENTS

n ow l ea s i n g fall 2012

Available 4 bedrooms: 508 E. Healey 207 S. Fifth 201 E. Healey 301 Water

4 Bedroom/2 Full Bath Flat screen TV, leather furniture, balconies Located on the 22 bus line Starting @ $375/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

604 E. White

Studio, 1, & Huge Multi-Level 2 Bedrooms One block from Engineering Quad, on major bus lines Starting @ $400/month universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

1006 S. Third

1, 2, 3 Bedrooms Huge Multi-Level Townhouses New kitchens, hardwood ﬂoors, ﬂat screen TV Leather furniture, walk-in closets universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

Apartments

207 S. Fifth

509 Bash Ct.

3 & 5 Bedrooms Located behind Legend's Hardwood ﬂoor, ﬂat screen TV, balconies Starting @ $330/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

203 E. Healey

3 Bedrooms Leather furniture, ﬂat screen TV, hardwood ﬂoor, balconies Located behind Papa Del's Starting @ $317/person universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

Do You Want Close? Leasing for Fall Engineering Campus

Close In

Urbana Locations

Illini Union 3 1/2 Blocks Mech. Eng. 3 Blocks

3&4 BEDROOMS Digital Comp. Lab, Grainger, Siebel 2 1/2 Blocks

Office 911 W. Springfield, Urbana 344-3008 www.BaileyApartments.com Check us out on facebook!

• On engineering &

505 E . H ea l e y

5 0 5 S . Fi f t h St. • Ch a m p a i gn , I L w w w. j s m a p t s. co m • 2 1 7 . 359.6108

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1107 S. Sign Fourth

a 4 or 5 bedroom lease!

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NEWLY REMODLED New Kitchens

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group

605 S. Fifth

Studio, 1, 2 & 3 Bedroom/ 2 Full Bath Located @ 5th & Green Leather Furniture, ﬂat screen TV, large balconies universitygroupapartments.com (217)352-3182

901 W. Springfield, U $ 520-570 911 W. Springfield, U $ 525-595 1004 W. Springfield, U $ 499-529

Furnished

theuniversity

104 E. Armory

1 Bedroom

503 - 505 - 508 White 2 Bedroom with den $790 3 Bedroom $830-950

420

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Available 3 bedrooms: 501 E. Healey 505 E. Healey 201 E. Healey

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theuniversity

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www.gregory-towers.com 217-352-3182 PANTONE 138

420 APARTMENTS

OCTOBER 20 - 26, 2011

Great location. 2 blocks from main quad. Leather furniture, hardwood floors, & flat screen TV. Loft style 4 and 5 bedrooms, each with 2 full bathrooms. Great location! Just across from the U of I Armory.

Available Fall 2012: 4BR Loft $1700 GREGORY 5BR Loft $1880 TOWERS

computer science campus (Urbana Side) • DSL Available • Parking Available

2 Bedroom 901 W. Springﬁeld, U 111 S. Lincoln, U

• Furnished $ 695-740 $ 795

• Microwave • Dishwashers (In 2-3-4 Br Apt)

3 Bedroom 1010 W. Springﬁeld, U $999-1272 111 S. Lincoln, U $1095

• Central A/C (except 1004 bulding) • 24 Hr. Maintenance • Laundry on site • No Pets

4 Bedroom 1010 W. Springﬁeld, U $1696 111 S. Lincoln, U $1200-1596

• Garbage Included • Monthly Preventitive Pest Control

For Info: (217) 344-3008 911 W. Springfield, Urbana www.BaileyApartments.com

PANTONE COOL GRAY 6

buzz PANTONE 138

PANTONE 138 PANTONE 138

PANTONE COOL GRAY 6

PANTONE COOL GRAY 6 PANTONE 138

PANTONE COOL GRAY 6

AND ANOTHER THING ...

BY MICHAEL COULTER

ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING Hangin’ with Uncle Coulter It started like any normal Saturday morning — up a little too early and a little hungover, but surprisingly functional. I got dressed and watched the dog defile the backyard while I sipped some coffee. I mentally checked off the list of the chores I was not going to do this fine day. It was a bit chilly outdoors but totally acceptable. I had the whole damned day. I was experiencing a magnificent, calm satisfaction that I knew would never last. I pretended it would anyway. I settled in behind my XBOX controller and decided to spend a large part of my day pretending I was an assassin. I was quickly in my own little world where I believed my biggest decision of the day was whether to have ribs or sushi for lunch. I was even considering going out again on Saturday night. In roughly two minutes, it would become clear that I would have to go out on Saturday night. There was a knock at the door, and my mind began to race. Who the piss could this be? None of the options seemed good. My best hope was that it was some sort of salesman whose ass I could quickly chew before turning my attention back to

my sanctuary. I peered around the corner to the door, thinking I would just ignore the situation if I didn’t like the looks of what I saw. Instead, I had to face the music that I’d forgotten I said I’d face. The promises all came back to me. The Coulters had said they would babysit today, and things were about to get very unfamiliar. My wife’s nieces were smiling and jumping at the door because they apparently enjoy putting their lives in peril. I immediately ran down the hallway and told the wife to get the hell out of bed. We were Pearl Harbor, and they were the planes on the horizon. I should quickly point out that the nieces are great girls and totally fun, but it seemed like a lot of pressure. I should also quickly point out that this babysitting task only seemed huge because most of the people we know would not entrust us with picking up their mail, let alone watching after their children. I went to the door and welcomed them aboard. Normally when guests come over, I offer them a beer or possibly a glass of Scotch, but that seemed inappropriate this time. I’m not sure if this was because they were children or because it was before noon. Either way, they got an orange soda instead.

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It was oddly calm as we settled into the living room. This calm was rescinded when it became clear the girls were fixated on the video game that was still on the TV. “Uncle Mike, can we play? Can we play?” I’m not sure at what age it’s okay for children to virtually wield a sword and destroy their enemies, but this did not seem like that age. I compromised and only let them destroy their virtual enemies with their fists. There wasn’t a lot of time for this anyway since we had a big day planned. The first part of this plan was walking to get our cars that we left downtown the previous evening after several cocktails. It’s weird, but children don’t walk like normal people. There’s no pace at freaking all. They will go from a virtual standstill to a full on wind sprint with very little variance in between. It still takes the same amount of time to get to your destination, but it’s somehow more tiring. It could just be the residual alcohol from the night before, but I’m already sort of exhausted. Once we had a vehicle, it was off to a playground for a picnic and some playing. Kids are apparently not all that into ribs or sushi, so we went with McDonald’s. Lunch went pretty well, but it was really just something we all had to do before the playground, the cool-looking one

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down on Windsor road. I’d never really been there before, but it seemed pretty cool. Even though I was accompanying children, I felt a little weird, like I should be holding up a sign that said, “I’m not here to steal your child.” I gotta tell you, it is work to keep your eyes on a couple of crazy, excited girls. Plus, they blend in pretty well with all the other ones. I got a lot of the “Hey, mister, watch me.” I could only respond with, “Yeah, that’s great. Where the hell do you get the energy?” Eventually, we left the park, and they had to go home. We got some really sweet hugs and some thank yous as they loaded up into the car. I asked if they were tired, and they said, “a little bit.” At this point, I became convinced they were mutants. How the hell can they just be a little tired? Geez Louise, it was all I could do to keep my eyes open, and I felt there was a distinct possibility that my wife would have to carry my sleeping body into the house. The girls waved, and their car drove away. We waved and decided to just take a nap wherever we happened to fall. Fortunately, this was in the house, and after a few hours of sleep, it almost felt like we could do it again sometime.

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY ARIES

March 21-April 19

If you have been resisting the command to go deeper, now is the time to surrender. If you have been hoping that the pesky little voice in your head will shut up and stop bugging you to get more involved, you’d better stop hoping. If you’ve been fantasizing about how to escape the growing pressure to give more of yourself, I suggest that instead you fantasize about how you could intensify your commitments. The time has come to explore what has been missing and what needs more love.

TAURUS

April 20-May 20

GEMINI

May 21-June 20

Did you know it is illegal to break into prison? That was the charge leveled against a Georgia man, Harry Jackson, who was arrested as he tried to sneak back into the jail from which he had escaped only a short time before. During his brief taste of freedom, Jackson allegedly stole 14 packs of cigarettes from a nearby store. Maybe that was his intention from the beginning -- to do an errand and return “home.” Please don’t be like him in the coming weeks, Taurus. If you do manage to spring yourself from a trap or bust out of your servitude (and I expect you will do just that), don’t come crawling back later and beg to be allowed back in.

As I was meditating on your horoscope this afternoon, I gazed out my window at the creek flowing nearby. The tide was coming in, which meant that the current was surging swiftly south. Row upon row of small waves were coursing through the water. Then I spied a lone duck swimming north against the tide. I couldn’t imagine what her motivation was. Why not just relax and float downstream? She wasn’t in a hurry and wasn’t in the least flustered. Ever forward she went, determined to push on. And then it struck me, as I thought of your current astrological omens, that her approach would also suit you quite well right now. Go steadily and casually against the flow, Gemini.

CANCER

June 21-July 22

Herbert Kitchener served as the British ConsulGeneral in Egypt early last century. He wasn’t impressed with the creativity of the ancient nation’s art. “I can’t think much of the people who drew cats the same for 4,000 years,” he remarked. Is there an equivalent to this lack of development in your own life? Among your own activities, are there any whose history has shown no progression? Did you reach a certain skill level in some area of your life and then stop pushing to improve? This would be an excellent time to identify that knot of excess stability, and then get started on dissolving it.

LEO

July 23-Aug. 22

LIBRA

SCORPIO

by Matt Jones

“Change of Address”--can you deliver?

Oct. 23-Nov. 21

SAGITTARIUS

Nov. 22-Dec. 21

CAPRICORN

Dec. 22-Jan. 19

Your nightly dreams provide useful clues about your waking life. They can show you hidden patterns and unconscious motivations that your daytime mind hasn’t noticed. On rare occasions, they may even offer more literal guidance. That’s what happened for David Brown, a British man who one morning woke up from a dream of seeing a mysterious phone number. As an experiment, he sent a text message to that very number: “Did I meet you last night?” Michelle Kitson, the stranger on the other end, responded with a text, and then Brown texted back. More exchanges ensued, followed by a face-to-face encounter, and eventually the two were married. I can’t guarantee anything quite as dramatic for you, Scorpio, but I do expect your dreams will be unusually helpful. In addition to reading your astrological omens, I did a Tarot reading, consulted the I Ching, and threw the runes. They all gave me the same message: The coming week would be a good time for you to spend quality time mulling over the Biggest Mystery of Your Life. It’s not mandatory that you do so. You won’t cause a disaster if you refuse. Still, wouldn’t it be fun? Life is inviting you to get re-excited about your personal version of the quest for the Holy Grail. Your future self is calling and calling and calling for you to dive into the ancient riddle you’ve been working on since before you were born. The mists are parting.

In Sue Allison’s theater piece “Lies I’ve Told,” two actors take turns telling each other some classic whoppers. Here are a few: 1. “It would be no trouble at all.” 2. “This will only take a second.” 3. “I didn’t get your message.” 4. “I have no idea how that got here.” 5. “I thought you said ‘the 16th.’” 6. “Would I lie to you?” See if you can avoid fibs like those, Capricorn. I’m not asking you to be a superstar of candor -- that’s unrealistic -- but I do encourage you to cut back on white lies and casual dishonesties as much as possible. This is a time when you really need to know the whole truth and nothing but. And the best way to work toward that goal is to be forthright yourself. That’s how karma operates.

AQUARIUS

VIRGO

PISCES

Aug. 23-Sept. 22

Sept. 23-Oct. 22

jone sin’

Meraki is a Greek word that refers to the bliss you feel when you’re engaged in a task that’s important to you and that you’re doing really well. It’s your theme right now, Libra. According to my reading of the astrological omens, everything’s in place for you to experience meraki in abundance. Furthermore, that’s exactly what your destiny is pushing for. So please get out there and do everything you can to cooperate: Make this a meraki-filled week.

I’m not warning you to cut down on all the leaping and cavorting you’ve been doing lately; I’m just saying that maybe you should add some ballast to your foundation and some gravitas to your demeanor. And I don’t mean to guilt-trip you into toning down your lust to connect with everyone and everything that tickles your synapses. But I do suggest you consider the possibility that beginning very soon variety will not be quite as spicy as it has been; your deft zigzags may need to be carried out with gentler zigs and slightly more cautious zags.

The autocorrect feature sometimes distorts the text messages people send on their smart phones. It tries to fix supposedly misspelled words that aren’t really misspelled, thereby creating awkward variations that can cause a ruckus when they’re received, like changing “I don’t want to leave” to “I don’t want to live.” Damn You, Autocorrect! is a book documenting some of the most outrageous examples, many NSFW. Be vigilant for metaphorical versions of this wayward autocorrect phenomenon, Virgo. Be sure that in your efforts to make things better, you don’t render them worse or weird. Consider the possibility that stuff is fine just the way it is.

october 20 – 26, 2011

Jan. 20-Feb. 18

Last June, Northern California artist Mary Sobrina Kuder did a gallery show of her paintings. She called it “Offerings of Grace and Mischief.” That would be an excellent title for the story of your life in the coming week, Aquarius. I believe that you will be receiving offerings of grace and mischief, and I hope you will also be making such offerings. For best results, remember this: The grace and mischief are not contradictory or at odds. In fact, they need each other and belong together.

Feb. 19-March 20

Do you realize how many connections to remote places you have? Are you aware of how routinely you are touched by distant events? As science writer David Bodanis reminds us, “We inhale many hundreds of particles in each breath we take. Salt crystals from ocean whitecaps, dust scraped off distant mountains, micro bits of cooled magma blown from volcanoes, and charred microfragments from tropical forest fires.” I urge you to use that as your metaphorical theme this week, Pisces. Let your imagination run free as you renew your connections with faraway sources of nourishment. Revivify your intimacy with departed influences that continue to define you. Dream about the tantalizing future.

Stumped? Find the solutions in the Classifieds pages.

Across

1) Its fruit is made into paste 6) Prince William’s mother 11) Some radios 14) Before 15) Cold War era columnist Joseph 16) Pitchblende, for one 17) “___ believe we’ve met...” 18) Actress Thurman, after joining the “More Than a Feeling” band? 20) Abe, after being demoted to the dollar bill? 22) “Spamalot” creator Idle 23) Prefix meaning one-tenth 24) Scream from atop a chair 25) Class that requires little effort 26) Compass dir. 27) Rapture 28) Batting stat 30) Hebrew letter 31) Skillet 32) Driving hazard 34) Divine guidance from an “Entourage” agent? 37) Came to fit, as clothing 38) Get prepared for battle 39) No longer active, as a Sgt. 40) Suffix after employ 41) ___ Butterworth’s 42) Railroad stop: abbr. 45) Love, to Laurent

47) Massive Brit. lexicon 48) Frequent documentary subj. 49) Lives in print? 50) Explorer Walter’s new company? 53) Bonham Carter’s personal ambulance staff? 55) ___ Lippi (painter of “Madonna and Child Enthroned”) 56) Vexation 57) Dustpan “co-worker” 58) Shaq’s surname 59) Part of AMA 60) Spray perfume 61) Talking Head David

Down

1) Groups of craftsmen 2) Private garments 3) Right away 4) Leonardo’s hometown 5) Choir member 6) Coleman of “9 to 5” 7) “Do ___ like I’m kidding?” 8) Part of AMA 9) Staff figure? 10) Abbr. on military mail 11) Excellent, to Roger Ebert 12) He taught Daniel-san 13) Capri’s Blue Grotto, for instance 19) Teacher’s org.

21) Catlike 25) Downy ducks 27) Oscar winner Bardem 28) Rand Paul’s father 29) Rum brand with a fruit bat on the label 31) “Batman” sound effect 32) ___ Speedwagon 33) Aries animal 34) Grand opening 35) Went back to the drawing board with 36) Rehab relapse sign, for short 37) Order from a villain to the henchmen 41) Start of a tryst request 42) “Dora the Explorer” antagonist 43) Historic musical “Alley” of Manhattan 44) Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls 46) Fair ___ laws 47) “Stand and Deliver” actor Edward James ___ 48) Likely to complain about everything 50) Not an everyday occurrence 51) “___ Flux” (MTV cartoon) 52) Toothpaste amount 54) “Community” network

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OCTOBER 20 - 26, 2011

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