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Writing Techniques: Amplification of news articles Roberta Grandi UniversitĂ della Valle dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Aosta

• THE COMMUNICATIVE STRATEGY OF AMPLIFICATION CONSISTS IN THE ENLARGEMENT OF A TEXT • The material for this contribution is adapted from the chapter “Amplifications” (written by R. Grandi), in the book Writing Techniques : Workbook 2009, R. Baldi – A. Caldirola – R. Grandi, Milano : Universita cattolica del Sacro Cuore, Diritto allo studio , 2009.

• The aim is to make the text more adequate to the communicative context and aim. • The text is “amplified” in order to transmit a precise meaning to the receiver involved.

• Communicative function • is a term used to refer to the purpose of the communication and what we can do with language to achieve that purpose. • ‘Who says what to whom for what purpose?’

‘Who says what to whom for what purpose?’ • who refers to the sender / source / writer, and what to the message (for example news writing, advertisements, literature, business, scientific prose, etc.). • whom refers to the receiver / target audience / addressee (for example the expert, the semi-expert and the nonspecialist).

The purpose or function can be •

•

EXPRESSIVE: it refers to language used to reflect the sender’s state of mind, including his feelings about or attitude to a particular topic. Typical examples of expressive texts are novels, poetry, autobiographies and letters to the editor. INFORMATIVE: it refers to language used for the purpose of communicating the facts of the subject matter under consideration. Typical examples of informative texts are textbooks, articles, news, product information and technical reports. DIRECTIVE: it is oriented towards the receiver, language being used to instruct, direct or influence the receiver. Typical examples of directive texts are advertising, reviews, manuals and operating instructions.

• A news article is a text that discusses current or recent news of either general interest (i.e. daily newspapers) or on a specific topic (i.e. political or trade news magazines, club newsletters, or technology news websites). • Amplifying a news article usually means elaborating: – the INFORMATIVE FUNCTION, i.e. adding information – the EXPRESSIVE FUNCTION, i.e. adding emotional remarks (human “interest”)

In news articles the writer gives facts and detailed information following answers to general questions • “who?”, “what?”, “when?”, “where?” • and also “why?” and “how?”

The ideal layout of a news article is made up of at least three paragraphs: • 1 paragraph: “who”, “what”, “when” and “where”, (why and how); • 2 paragraph: “why” and “how” + narration or description, context, consequences and other secondary aspects; • 3 paragraph: further pieces of information, interviews, quotes, comments, reactions and conclusion.

Headlines and subheadings •

• •

• • •

Word plays: – “It's your count that votes!”, “Truck by lightning”, “Butter battle spreads”, “Headless body in topless bar” rhyming words – “Glass with class”, “Green queen” Homophones – hours/ ours, arc/ark, die/dye, right/write, bald/bold, serial/cereal, bean/been, whole/ hole, cent/sent/scent, mail/male, peer/pier, “Witch Halloween costume is for you?” Homonyms – Bear, left, lie, bank Polysemes – Milk (verb and noun), wood, shot Alliterations – “Science has Spoiled my Supper”, “Too Much Talent in Tennessee?”

Headlines and subheadings • Cultural references – “The bounty of mutiny, “All swell that end swell”, “Words speak louder than actions!”, “The pun is mightier than the word” • Omission of grammatical words (articles and verbs) – “Troubling portrait of Alabama gunman” • Headline + subheading: key information of the covered story

Dispatch: The former chair of roads policing at the Association of Chief Police Officers (Acpo) has been banned from driving for speeding at 90mph. Top cop guilty of speeding Senior policeman Meredydd Hughes handed six-week driving ban over 90mph speeding charge Meredydd Hughes, the chief constable of South Yorkshire, apologised after being caught on camera in a 60mph zone on the A5 at Chirk near Wrexham in May. He stood down from his role at Acpo after he was summonsed for the offence, which happened when he was on holiday. He was disqualified for 42 days and fined £350 by Wrexham magistrates. The court heard the chief constable was caught driving at 90mph in his Y-reg Audi at 8.17am on 28 May. "With regards to the offence itself, Mr Hughes recalls that on that morning he was returning from north Wales where he was on a short climbing holiday. He doesn't seek to make any excuse about this matter. He totally accepts that the police have a duty to do," Mr Edwards, Hughes’ lawyer, said. "He is no exception and he accepts that he must be punished for the offence. He asks me to apologise for the offence. He recognises that the matter is a serious matter." Jools Townsend, of road safety campaigners Brake said Hughes' offence was "shocking" and called the sentence lenient. "By committing this deadly crime, Hughes undermines the work of traffic police to protect the safety of road users, both within his force and across the country. He should seriously consider his position as a result." But the anti-speed camera group Safe Speed said: "The hypocrisy is breathtaking. Mr Hughes should clearly have been preaching what he practices – because clearly he knows that exceeding the speed limit isn't necessarily dangerous."

The process of amplification of a text is carried out introducing new elements such as: • Adjectives, adverbs, etc. • Rhetorical devices such as figures of speech, etc. • Definitions, examples, etc. REMEMBER: • you CAN change the structure of the text • you CAN add new pieces of information (even fabricated) • you CAN’T change the meaning of the text

Sound plausible and be coherent

Guided exercise: •

Dispatch: Student died in mountain accident. A climber who lost his life after falling about 400ft (135m) in the Cairngorm mountain range has been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. The mechanical engineering student fell while climbing Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. Northern Constabulary said he was part of a large group of climbing enthusiasts from Bristol University. In November of last year two men from Aberdeen died after spending a night in extreme weather on Coire an t-Sneachda.

• Analyse the dispatch: – Who is the protagonist of this piece of news? – What happened? – When did it happen? – Where did it happen?

Distinguish the data provided into primary information (what, who when, where), and secondary (why and how, additional pieces of information). – what, who when, where: – Student died in mountain accident. A climber who lost his life after falling about 400ft (135m) in the Cairngorm mountain range has been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. The mechanical engineering student fell while climbing Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. – why and how, additional pieces of information: – Northern Constabulary said he was part of a large group of climbing enthusiasts from Bristol University. In November of last year two men from Aberdeen died after spending a night in extreme weather on Coire an t-Sneachda

Prepare a layout of the article: if you need to add pieces of information you can fabricate them. • First paragraph: what, who when, where • Student died in mountain accident. A climber who lost his life after falling about 400ft (135m) in the Cairngorm mountain range has been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. The mechanical engineering student fell while climbing Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. • Second paragraph: why and how, secondary information, description and narration; interview – Northern Constabulary said he was part of a large group of climbing enthusiasts from Bristol University. • Third paragraph: further information, emotional aspects, comments, conclusion – In November of last year two men from Aberdeen died after spending a night in extreme weather on Coire an t-Sneachda

Adding adjectives • Adj. of quality (beautiful), size (big), age (young), temperature (cold), colour (red), origin (Chinese), shape (round), etc. • Comparative and superlative adj.(better, the best) • Possessive adj. (his, their, etc.) • Quantifiers (each, any, some, all the, etc.)

Adding adjectives A young university student died in a terrible mountain accident. The reckless climber who lost his life after falling about 400ft (135m) in the beautiful but dangerous Cairngorm mountain range has been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. The brilliant mechanical engineering student fell while climbing steep Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. Northern Constabulary said the young boy was part of a large amateur group of climbing enthusiasts from famous Bristol University. In November of last year two other men from Aberdeen died after spending a nightmarish night in extreme weather on Coire an t-Sneachda. 97 words

Adding adverbs • • • • •

Adverbs of manner (badly, suddenly) Adv. of place (above, backwards) Adv. of time (now, last Monday) Adv. of frequency (always, often) Adv. of degree (quite, rather, too, very)

Adding adverbs •

A young university student died in a terrible mountain accident. The reckless climber who yesterday tragically lost his life after falling about 400ft (135m) in the beautiful but dangerous Cairngorm mountain range has finally been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. The brilliant mechanical engineering student fell accidentally while climbing steep Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. • This morning Northern Constabulary said the young boy was part of a relatively large amateur group of climbing enthusiasts from internationally famous Bristol University. • In November of last year two other men from Aberdeen died after spending a nightmarish night in extremely cold weather on Coire an t-Sneachda. • 104 words •

Adding parentheticals, coordinates, subordinates, etc. • Parenthetical clauses (use () or – or commas) • Coordinates (introduced by commas, and, or, but, etc.) • Subordinates: – Noun clauses (that, when, where, why: he told me that he hates me, the question is when he did it) – Relative clauses (that, which, who, whom, whose: he is the man who lives next door) – Adverbial clauses (as, where, because, when: do as you like!)

• New sentences.

Adding parentheticals, coordinates, subordinates, etc. •

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The brilliant mechanical engineering student was taking part in the first climbing excursion of his life and fell accidentally while climbing steep Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. This morning Northern Constabulary said the young man (who had been previously warned by the guides to avoid that side of the mountain) was part of a large amateur group of climbing enthusiasts from internationally famous Bristol University where his death has affected many students.

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In November of last year two other men from Aberdeen died after spending a nightmarish night in extremely cold weather on Coire an tSneachda.

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156 words

Adding rhetorical figures, emotional remarks, direcht speech or quotes â&#x20AC;˘ Analogy: compares two things, which are alike in several respects for the purpose of explaining a difficult idea. â&#x20AC;&#x201C; You may abuse a tragedy, though you cannot write one. You may scold a carpenter who has made you a bad table, though you cannot make a table. (Samuel Johnson)

Adding rhetorical figures, emotional remarks, direcht speech or quotes • Simile: an explicit comparison between two things using ‘like’ or ‘as’ • My love is like a red, red rose (Robert Burns) • Metaphor: implied comparison achieved through a figurative use of words • You are my sunshine • My memory is a little foggy • Personification: attribution of personality to an impersonal thing • England expects every man to do his duty. (Lord Nelson)

Adding rhetorical figures and emotional remarks •

A black cloud of death lingers around the snowy summit of Coire an t-Sneachda. The death toll of the fatal mountain has risen after a young university student died in a terrible mountain accident. The reckless climber who yesterday tragically lost his life after falling like an unfledged young eagle about 400ft (135m) in the beautiful but dangerous Cairngorm mountain range has finally been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. Northern Constabulary said Mr Pitcaine was taken to Raigmore Hospital by a RAF helicopter where he was pronounced dead. The brilliant mechanical engineering student was taking part in the first climbing excursion of his life and fell accidentally while climbing steep Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday.

•

This morning Northern Constabulary said the young man (who had been previously warned by the guides to avoid that side of the mountain) was part of a large amateur group of climbing enthusiasts from internationally famous Bristol University where his death has affected many students. A minute's silence in his memory has just taken place at the Student Council and many have expressed their condolences. “He was so strong most people thought he could do anything. I suppose he probably thought so too,” said a friend.

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In November of last year two other men from Aberdeen died after spending a nightmarish night in extremely cold weather on Coire an t-Sneachda. An old legend says that the mountain, like a cruel queen transformed into a rock, seems to expect from the braves who try to conquer her the sacrifice of their lives.

Now verify that your article fulfils all the points of the layout and give it a title and a subheading. Fatal climb on killer Cairngorms Student Dies in Mountain Plunge A black cloud of death lingers around the snowy summit of Coire an t-Sneachda. The death toll of the fatal mountain has risen after a young university student died in a terrible mountain accident. The reckless climber who yesterday tragically lost his life after falling like an unfledged young eagle about 400ft (135m) in the beautiful but dangerous Cairngorm mountain range has finally been named as 20-year-old Hugh Pitcairn. Northern Constabulary said Mr Pitcaine was taken to Raigmore Hospital by a RAF helicopter where he was pronounced dead. The brilliant mechanical engineering student was taking part in the first climbing excursion of his life and fell accidentally while climbing steep Crotched Gully on Coire an t-Sneachda on Wednesday. This morning Northern Constabulary said at a press conference that the young man (who had been previously warned by the guides to avoid that side of the mountain) was part of a large amateur group of climbing enthusiasts from internationally famous Bristol University, where his death has affected many students. A minute's silence in his memory has just taken place at the Student Council and many have expressed their condolences. â&#x20AC;&#x153;He was so strong most people thought he could do anything. I suppose he probably thought so too,â&#x20AC;? said a friend. In November of last year two other men from Aberdeen died after spending a nightmarish night in extremely cold weather on Coire an t-Sneachda. An old legend says that the mountain, once a cruel queen transformed into a rock, expects from the brave who try to conquer her the sacrifice of their lives.

(272 words)