Farm and Ranch Wife Ramblings: Finding Balance in the Busy Seasons of Life

by Macey Mueller for the Red Angus Magazine

Like many of our fellow farmers and ranchers, my husband Josh and I often get asked “when do things slow down for you guys?” It’s a question that typically garners a sly chuckle and then a bewildered grimace as we go through our mental to-do list for the approaching season.

For the most part, we are fortunate to set our own schedules, but the truth is, there are very few “slow” times for us.

By trade, I am a freelance writer and Josh is a cattle marketer, but together we are business owners, agricultural producers, animal caretakers, bookkeepers, industry volunteers and most importantly, parents to our four kids. As entrepreneurs, we are admittedly guilty of picking up new ventures without setting anything to the side in our efforts to build upon generations of grind and grit and to continue growing a family business those four kids will (hopefully) aspire to be part of one day.

With a fall-calving commercial cow herd, I’d love to say the winter months pass by with less to do compared to those who have calves hitting the ground after the first of the year, but we somehow stay plenty busy prepping for our weekly cattle auctions and keeping our custom backgrounded cattle fed, watered and healthy. Throw in the holidays, year-end tax preparations and the barrage of ag-related meetings and conventions we both attend from December through March, and it’s easy to see how time moves so quickly, even in the dead of winter.

Farm Living is the Life for Me

Before you think I’m lamenting this arduous life we live, let me tell you how much I love it. I grew up in the cattle business, earned agricultural degrees and even worked for a large agricultural advocacy organization, but there was a time when I was living a big city life in a downtown condo. I couldn’t smell the fresh air, I couldn’t drive the backroads and I couldn’t watch the sun set.

It wasn’t until I started dating my husband – a fourth-generation Kansas farmer and rancher – that I realized how much this lifestyle meant to me. There is absolutely nowhere else I’d choose to put down roots, raise a family and build a business than rural America. It is beautiful and bountiful and in the abbreviated words of Cara Dutton from the television show 1923, “You will be free in a way that most people can barely conceive.”

That quest for freedom, however, requires an unwavering dedication and oftentimes a hefty commitment of time. Thankfully, in our case, it’s time spent doing things we enjoy, and time spent teaching our kids the value of hard work and responsibility.

A major revelation in my tenure as a farm and ranch wife was finally getting a handle on the seasonal activities of our operation – everything from pasture burning, field planting and preg checking to pen cleaning, cattle shipping and bill paying – and understanding where my time and

Finding Balance in the Busy Seasons of Life

energy is best spent. For example, I know when harvest rolls around, we will typically have enough manpower to keep the machines rolling, but not likely without “Macey’s Meals on Wheels, Parts Delivery and Taxi Service” working in the background to keep everyone fed and in the fields. Other times, like at branding or weaning, it’s all hands on deck and I take a more formative role in getting the job done, even if that means strapping our youngest on my back as I administer vaccinations.

When we began having children, it was initially very hard for me to find balance between the daily demands of raising babies and the desperate desire to stay involved in our operation. It was in this season that I took over more of the bookkeeping responsibilities (I’m still not an expert, but I get fewer calls from our accountant each year) and used the opportunity to identify our financial strengths and weaknesses and engage my husband in discussions about the future of our operation. It has been a game-changer in our ability to communicate as we consider potential shifts or improvements and has given me the sense of ownership I need when my day-to-day mom duties keep me from being hands-on outside.

To fully appreciate this personal enlightenment, you have to know that my husband and I have completely different personalities. Josh is a big-picture guy and I am detailed to a fault. I truly believe God brought us together to complement one another’s strong suits and to help fill in the gaps when needed. The contrast in our behaviors and tendencies can be frustrating at times but learning to respect our different approaches has ultimately served us well in many

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Finding Balance in the Busy Seasons of Life endeavors – from major purchasing decisions to parenting our kids to preparing for busy times in our operation.

Stocking Up for Spring

And speaking of the busy times ... the days are starting to get longer and so is the list of warm-weather farm and ranch activities and responsibilities. For my crew, that means eating a lot more meals outdoors and on the run.

The approaching change in seasons is my reminder to start stocking up on the essentials needed to feed a small army in a moment’s notice. Whether it’s preparing field meals during planting and harvest time, feeding a crew of cowboys after processing cattle or just enjoying a nice evening and impromptu dinner on the deck with neighbors, my sanity depends on an ample supply of paper products, aluminum pans (don’t forget the lids!), bottled water, pantry staples and a few easy desserts prepped in the freezer.

This time of year, I’ve made a habit of thawing a couple pounds of ground beef at the beginning of each week in anticipation of such events. At the very least, I can use it for a quick mid-week family dinner, but more times than not, I am grilling up burgers or making meatballs to feed the

Gardening and Grace

As your typical Type A farm and ranch wife, I put a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself to do it all – raise a family, run businesses, care for God’s creatures, advocate for an industry we love … and then just because I like a good challenge, I attempt to grow a garden.

Finding Balance in the Busy Seasons of Life

Josh will tell you I have great ambitions each spring – designing a layout, researching appropriate varieties for our hardiness zone, sourcing plants and seeds and then working as a family to get everything in the ground. I keep it watered and somewhat weeded, and we enjoy the literal fruits (and vegetables) of our labor through the first part of the sum- mer. By Independence Day each year, however, it becomes very apparent that I cannot keep up with the demands of a successful garden, despite my love of fresh produce, my ability to can and preserve and my typically very strong will to succeed at these types of tasks.

It is in this heat-of-the-summer moment – when I’m keeping the figurative home fires burning while Josh is leaving the house at 4 a.m. to ship cattle out of the Flint Hills and we’re seeing our largest runs of grass cattle coming through the auction barn – that I remember sometimes a gal just needs a little grace, and the garden is usually where I have to start.

Don’t be afraid to extend yourself the same grace when the busiest of the busy season is upon you, because try as we might, there really is no perfect balance in a lifestyle like ours. It takes planning, teamwork, compromise and the hard realization that sometimes there are just not enough hours in the day, but I know most of us can agree there’s no better way to live. //