Red&Black (10-24-14) Homecoming

October 24, 2014

Red & Black

The Student Newspaper of Washington & Jefferson College

WHAT WE’RE TALKING ABOUT LIFE

“The bodies and fashion savvy of first ladies have always been held under media scrutiny, but steps have been made over the years to change the position into something more.

Ioseb Jorjoliani: Georgia’s New Young Ambassador

ARTS

“The Next location is known as the “Scarehouse,” which is located in Pittsburgh. The “Scarehouse” has been around for 100 years.”

OPINIONS

Yik-Yak, but you’ll never guess who said it!

SUPERBURGER

You need to check out the Superburger this week! We’ve been hard at work writing the most honest hard-nosed journalism in all of Western PA, and we’ve put in all together into one special “Double Patty” edition.

INDEX: Campus-News ..... 1-5 Life ......................... 6-9 Arts .................... 10-13 Op-Ed ............... 14-17 Satire............... 18 Sports ................ 19-20 PLEASE RECYCLE THIS PAPER

Courtesy Ioseb Jorjoliani

Kyle Sossi Editor-in-chief Ioseb Jorjoliani (pictured above, second from right, posing with the Prime Minister of his home country of Georgia) was recently appointed a young ambassador of Georgia to the United States. Ioseb is an exchange student at W&J, who is in the middle of his sophomore year. Ioseb is extremely excited about the new opportunity and sees it as the fulfilment of a lifelong dream.

Ioseb said “I have always wanted to serve my country and assist it on its way to future success. As a Governmental Scholar I already had a huge responsibility to maintain a high academic

GPA for my governmental scholarship. However, this project of young ambassadors created a direct opportunity for me to play a real role in my country’s development.” He heard about this program through a Georgian woman from Voice of America, a broadcast institution, where he interned last summer. He said of applying for the project “The application was seven page long and at first I felt lazy completing it but of course at the end of deadline day I sent my seven page project with its financial plan and all additional documentations to the Ministry.”

Continued CAMPUS NEWS, PAGE 3

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Walker Room: The History of W&J’s Best Study Spot Cathreine McAdoo Red&Black Contributor

Like many places on campus, the Walker Room, located on the bottom floor of the library, was named after a wealthy benefactor of the school. John Walker was one of the big four iron manufacturers in Pittsburgh in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries. He, along with Carnegie, Phipps and Frick, played a major role in legitimizing the iron and steel business, paving the way for later manufacturers.

And making a lot of money in the process. Upon his death, John Walker left Washington and Jefferson College $10,000 dollars and 1,000 books. This in itself is extremely generous,

and would likely have earned him at least a small campus namesake, perhaps a plaque or portrait. But the story doesn’t end there. His widow, Mrs. Susan C. Walker, donated her late husband’s entire library to the school. This included not only 7,000 more books, but also a number of rugs, drapes, bookcases, lamps, tables, and lounging chairs to be used to create a quiet reading room for the students. This room, set up in the basement of the old Thompson library building in 1933, was named the “Walker Memorial Room,” and set up to as closely resemble the original room as was possible.

Evidently, this room was not used quite as often as was at first hoped. On Feb. 22, 1934, an announcement

went out to the students that, for the rest of the semester, smoking would be permitted in the room for the rest of the semester as a temporary experiment to see if this would attract more students.

If this experiment proved a success, the change in policy would be made permanent.

When the library moved from Thompson to its current location, the Walker room moved with it, and was once again set up to as closely resemble the industrial pioneer’s original library as possible. Mrs. Walker did not simply hand the college a check, as so many other patrons have done. She had a purpose in mind.

Her husband was an avid learner and man of

husband, who owns a Safety, HR and Strategic Consulting company.

In addition to this, she is the President of the Alumni Executive Council at W&J and has been for 6 years. She said that she stays active with the W&J community through “the Jay Admissions Council, reunion committee, fundraising, making calls and representing W&J at Chicago Alumni events, as well as at the inductions of new college presidents.” She often returns to W&J for various events and she commented on the changes she has noted: “The campus has only gotten more beautiful since I was a student. The Magellan project is amazing.

The Center for Energy Studies proves that W&J stays on the

cutting-edge.” She continued “Also, the caliber of students I meet at W&J never ceases to amaze me. The accolades they receive inside and outside of the classroom are outstanding. The environment at the college energizes me every time I return.

I am taken aback in conversations I have with students about their activities, travel or even their high level of maturity.” She argues that this is one of the greatest strengths of W&J and the liberal arts education. She said “A liberal arts education gives you the skills to adapt. I majored in Chemistry, but I also had the ability to solve problems, study sociology, see the impact of other fields on mine and develop an adaptive learning style. This

Courtesy of W&J Archives

Above is the picture of the walker room in Thompson Hall, before it was moved to it’s current restng place at the U. Grant Miller Library.

many talents, so to honor his memory, she wanted to cultivate these same traits in the students. The Walker Memorial Room has, from its start, been a place where students could go not to study, but to browse. To

look through the thousands of books available on the same shelves once used by John Walker, find one or two interesting title, spend some time comfortably reclined and, most importantly, reading.

benefited me deeply when I pursued an MBA during my graduate studies.” She offered a few pieces of advice to students at W&J, which she has found to be true. She said “Don’t be afraid to try experiences that you’re unsure of, pursue those interests that

might not be as obvious to you, utilize the network of alumni to find people in your field that you can reach out to and, if I can give just one piece of personal advice that comes from my mother, she always says to me: ‘Bloom where you’re planted’”

Alumni Spotlight: Dr. Julie Rothbardt, W&J Class of ‘93 Kyle Sossi Editor-in-Chief

Dr. Julie Rothbardt graduated from Washington and Jefferson College in 1993, with a degree in Chemistry and Russian Language. While she was at W&J, she was a member of Pi-Beta-Phi, President of Student Government, an RA, the head of the campus judicial board, a cheerleader and performed in the musical 42nd Street. After graduating from W&J, she went on to the University of Iowa for her MBA, then along to Saint Ambrose for her doctorate in business administration. She is a Professor of Business at Monmouth College, and lives with her three children and

Courtesy Alumni Office

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CAMPUS NEWS 3

Professor Robinson Freshman Spotlight: Sam Horowitz Soyos Shannon Adams Red&Black Staff

There are a lot of professors on campus. So many that we might not get to meet or take a class with them all.

Professor Michael Robinson teaches in the Philosophy department this year, teaching Philosophy 101, Intro to Ethics and a class on free will.

Do not panic if you have not heard of him before; he is a Visiting Assistant Professor this year, taking the places of professors who are taking sabbatical this year. These professors include Michael Wolf during thee fall semester and Gregg Osborne during the spring.

“Before coming to Washington & Jefferson, I taught at Grand Valley State University in Grand Rapids, Michigan and Florida State University in Tallahassee, Florida,” said Professor Robinson.

“I was a Visiting Assistant Professor for three years at GVSU. Last year I was the Big Questions in Free Will Postdoctoral Fellow at FSU," he contiued.

This is the third college at which Professor Robinson has taught. The saying goes the third times the charm, so maybe we will convince him to stick around a little bit longer this time around. Dr. Robinson specializes in the ethics and metaphysics of human agency, particularly in issues surrounding free will and

moral responsibility, which is the main focus of his research.

He has published his findings and has had multiple opportunities to show off the work he has been doing.

“I have presented my work at a number of professional philosophy conferences around the country, and I have published six journal articles in the last five years.”

Outside of the classrooms, he enjoys various activities: “I have a number of writing projects I’m working on this year, so a good bit of my time is spent at coffee shops consuming obscene amounts of coffee, eating pastries and typing away on my laptop.

I like to run and I really like good food, hence the running, so I’m looking forward to discovering the various parks, hiking trains and restaurants that the greater Pittsburgh area has to offer. Recommendations are always welcome!” he continued.

Though all of his accomplishments may seem intimidating, he fondly recalls a time when he was only a student:.

“Once, when I was an undergrad, my friends and I “borrowed” some geese from a nearby park and released them in one of the dorms on campus. It turns out that catching geese is much easier than you might think. No geese were harmed, by the way!”

Thank goodness W&J doesn’t have geese. We only have squirrels, and no one likes to mess with them anyway.

Siddhanta Bista Red&Black Staff

“In high school, all the smart kids went into the sciences, but at Washington & Jefferson, I am not sure if that’s what I want to do,” says Sam Horowitz Soyos.

Previously, Sam attended Camp Hill high school located in Camphill Pennsylvania Soyos is currently a freshman at Washington & Jefferson College and he is glad that he chose to attend a small liberal arts school to receive his college education. Earlier while he was in the process of applying to various colleges, the size of the school did not really matter. Now that he has been given the opportunity of studying in a small school he appreciates the size.“It was the

From COVER, Ioseb Jorjoliani PAGE 3

He went on to explain the process further, “The project lasts a year. In general 140 students applied for 10 different countries. The age was limited from 18 to 29. They finally selected only ten. I have waited for two weeks and finally they woke me up at 7 am."

Ioseb continued "They told me that they had some questions on my project and needed another interview, so I woke up at 7 am and prepared for another interview. However, it turned out that they

most economical option,” says Soyos on his decision to attend a school with a small student body over other schools.

Soyos was initially determined to be a Biology major, however, the flexibility of a Liberal Arts education has allowed Soyos to take various classes and understand his true passion. Instead of biology, he is currently interested in pursuing a major in English.Coming from a town of wealthy people, Soyos enjoys seeing people being sincere and truly interested in their work. “The best part about W&J is that people are really down to earth,” says Soyos.

Soyos is a member of the wrestling team as he has been a wrestler for the past nine years. During his time at W&J, he also wishes to take

part in a Magellan project.

Furthermore, he is excited about getting involved with Greek Life. “So far, I love the college and the people here.

Everything is great!” Soyos is one of many students attending W&J with an interesting family background. His father is one-hundred-percent Mayan from Guatemala, and his mother belongs to Judaism and his ancestors come from all over Europe. Soyos, himself, was born in Massachusetts but moved to New Mexico at the age of five. He later moved to Camphill, Pennsylvania.His hobbies include reason, playing video games and being actively involved in outdoor activities.

On what he values most, “Loyalty is something that I value most in a person.”

did not need anything, they just called me with couple of Georgian Journalists and congratulated me on my victory. I gave an interview to Georgian TV networks and was very happy after this splendid early morning surprise.”

Now, with this new appointment, Ioseb will have to complete a project that raises awareness of Georgian culture and life.

He said “I have to organize a Georgian Youth Forum, where Georgian Students with foreigner fellow students will gather and discuss the relative world events in relation to Georgia. The Government also wants to create Fellowship of Georgia’s friends, which will include American

and other international students who express interest in Georgian culture. I will serve as a mediator between Georgian Government and Youth in United States.”

In this way, Ioseb will raise awareness about his country as well as open up discussions between Americans and Georgians. Ioseb is incredibly proud and excited that he was chosen for this honor.

In addition to his work in class and his new position as a young ambassador, Ioseb is an active member of the W&J community: he hosts a global news radio show on WNJR, plays on the Rugby team and is the Special Events and Activities coordinator for the W&J International House.

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Red & Black

Kelly Meeder ‘ 09: Finalist in Dream Big Challenge

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American Mock Trial Association Siddhanta Bista Red&Black Staff

Carley Adams Red&Black Editor Kelly Meeder graduated from Washington & Jefferson in 2009 with a major in childhood development and education. She now teaches at Lakeland Elementary/Middle School in Baltimore, Md., where she is on a mission to make her and her students’ “big dreams” come true.

Meeder is one of three finalists in the running for a $100,000 grant to improve technology in her classroom.

This contest is called the “Dream Big Challenge,” and it is a program that supports teachers whose “big dreams” could change education in their school districts for the better.

While Meeder describes Lakeland as a positive, welcoming, motivational environment for students, she also admits that the school is severely lacking in its technology. When

she discovered the Dream Big Challenge, she saw an opportunity to change this. “[At Lakeland], I joined a group of teachers who want to drive instruction through use of technology,” she said.

“My ‘big dream’ is to expand technology use throughout our entire school.”

If Lakeland is selected as the winner of this contest, the school will receive a brand new computer lab with 30 new computers. It will also be awarded laptop carts and iPads for classroom use, and the school will also implement a parent and teacher technology-training program.

While winning this grant would mean significant technological advancements for her school, Meeder said that she believes her students can achieve anything they set their minds to as long as she is giving them her sincerest support.

She said she strives to try out creative teaching techniques every day as well

Courtesy of washjeff.edu

as cultivate strong bonds with her students. This, she explained, is something she learned through the W&J Education Department.

She also said that early exposure to fast-paced educational environments at W&J continues to help her as she completes her sixth year of teachin “At first, I thought my professors were overloading us with work,” she said. “But as I started my first year of teaching, I realized that every detail was just as important as they said.”

Meeder said that if she wins the Dream Big Challenge, she hopes that she can learn and share knowledge with new teachers about how to effectively use technology in the classroom.

“I would love to stay in contact with the W&J community and possibly build a partnership that involves first-year teachers in the Education Department,” she said.

The American Mock Trial Association (AMTA) was founded by Dean Richard Calkins in 1985.

AMTA stands as an organization for inter college mock trial competition. By engaging trail simulations in competition with teams from various colleges, students develop critical thinking and public speaking as well as an experience of legal practice and procedures.

The AMTA also develops regional and national level competitions, providing compelling and complex case materials.

The American Mock Trial Associations hosts 25 regional tournaments, as well as eight opening round championship tournaments and a national level championship tournament each season.

An estimate of around 600 teams from over 350 universities and colleges participate in this tournament.

AMTA attracts over 5,300 undergraduate students, each academic year for the mock trial competition from across the country.

Beginning in February all teams from any undergraduate institution are eligible to compete in the

Regional Tournaments. The top seven teams from the Regionals receive a bid to an opening round championship series in March.

After that, the top six teams from the tournament receive a bit to compete at the National Championship Tournament in April.

Since 2005, Washington & Jefferson College has also been an active competing member of the AMTA. Over the years, W&J has worked in its ranks and has become a nationally recognized force.

“This is my first time taking part in the Mock Trial Association and I look forward to this new experience,” says Joseph Jorjoliani ‘16.

Currently, the Mock Trial Association here at W&J is working and practicing towards taking part in the Regional Tournament that is scheduled to be held in hosted at Carnegie Mellon University from February 13-15, 2015.

This year, the Mock Trial Association’s president is Sean Happel and it will be interesting to see the members of the club taking part, and competing among various schools.

Over the years, W&J has been a promising school contributing to the AMTA. “The AMTA helps students work towards, being able to articulate their thoughts in a clear and coherent manner. I enjoy being a part of the Mock Trial here at W&J,” says Jack Myint, ‘17.

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Red & Black

S E C U R I T Y LO G S Date: 10/8/2014 Incident: Auto Theft A student called to report a theft from his vehicle. The car was parked under a city light pole in the 211 East Chestnut Street Rear Parking lot. When he arrived at his car, he found that his center console lid was open and that a pair of tan Oakley sunglasses, 2 generic ratchet sets, and a Swiss Army knife were missing.

Date: 10/12/2014 Incident: Medical Security was called to the lobby of a dorm because of an intoxicated student.

Upon arrival, security located the student who had slurred speech and appeared to be unsteady. The student stated that she had been drinking an alcoholic beverage called “jungle juice�. The ambulance came up and checked on the student, who was cleared to stay at the dorms.

Date: 10/12/2014 Incident: Assault and Obstruction Security received a call at 3:35am stating that there was a subject bleeding in the parking lot. When officers responded, they observed a group of males in an altercation. As an officer tried to separate the group, one male tried to aggressively push past him. When other officers arrived and one officer tried to approach the male student, the student became enraged, started chest bumping and got into a struggle with an officer after the officer tried to talk with the student. With the help of another officer, they took the student to the ground, where he continued to fight and yell profanities. He also continued to fight as they handcuffed him and placed him the cruiser. The student remained combative to the point that the Washington City Police had to be called. The student was arrested.

Date: 10/12/2014 Incident: Assault Security received a called from a student that there was a man on the porch that wouldn’t leave. When an officer arrived he found a male student pounding on the front door and screaming obscenities. The door was opened by an occupant of the house and the male student pushed his way past the door and the student who opened it by pushing her out of the way. Other students tried to stop the male student, but he pushed past all of them as well until he reached the chapter room where he started yelling obscenities at an individual in the room. The officer made his way into the room and confronted the man and ordered everyone else to leave. The students assaulted by the male student were interviewed.

CAMPUS NEWS 5

Red & Black Established 1909

Editor-in-Chief Managing Editor Production Manager Business Manager Campus News Editor Life Editor Arts Editor Opinions Editor Sports Editor Photography Editor Copy Editor Copy Editor Distribution Manager Adviser

Kyle Sossi Emily Bitting Bailey Murdick Amiti Sharma Lauryn halahurich Carley Adams Brittany Graft Emily Sterk Thomas Marcotte Caitlynn Gilles Mike Hornak Carolyn Tomlinson Gabriella Porazzi Dale Lolley

6 LIFE

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Chicago Teen Fleeing U.S. to Join ISIS? Sue Tran Red&Black Contributor Mohammed Hamzah Khan, a 19-year-old from Chicago suburb Bolingbrook, Ill., was arrested earlier this month on accusations of attempting to provide aid to the ISIS terrorist group.

ISIS is known for its use of violent tactics in order to gain control of large areas of Syria and Iraq.

In a three-page letter that he left for his parents, Khan stated that he was planning to leave the United States and join ISIS. He invited his family to join him, but he also warned them not to tell anyone about his plans. “First and foremost, please make sure not to tell

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the authorities,” he wrote. “For if this were to happen, it will jeopardize not only the safety of us but our family as well.”

According to Khan, he felt an obligation to “migrate” to ISIS territory.

He said in his letter that he could not bear the thought of his taxes in the U.S. being used to carry out airstrikes against his “Muslim brothers and sisters.”

“We are all witness that the Western societies are getting more immoral day by day,” Khan allegedly wrote. “I do not want my kids being exposed to filth like this.”

Khan was booked for a round-trip flight from Chicago to Istanbul.

However, once he crossed security at the airport, federal agents stopped him. Shortly

after, they executed a search of his home. Turkey is allegedly a common transit point for foreign fighters in Western countries who travel to join ISIS. Documents expressing support for ISIS and jihadists were recovered at Khan’s home.

Among them, authorities also found drawings of the black ISIS flag.

Khan told authorities during airport questioning that he was planning on working in some type of public service for ISIS. He stated that he might act as part of a police force providing humanitarian work or take up a combat role.

This is not the first time authorities have accused an American of supporting ISIS.

FBI Director James Comey told CBS’s 60 Minutes that the agency is tracking a dozen Americans that have joined terrorists groups in Syria.

“These homegrown violent extremists are troubled souls who are seeking meaning in some misguided way,” said

Comey. “They come across propaganda, and they become radicalized on their own.”

According to a CIA source, more than 15,000 foreign fighters, including 2,000 Westerners, have actively travelled overseas to join the civil war in Syria.

ident and chief executive of Chimerix.

The oral medication is meant to stop viruses from replicating and was originally developed to treat infections with DNA-containing viruses.

The drug can also be used to combat other illness, such as smallpox.

A few months ago, after the first initial reports of Ebola, Chimerix Inc. tested the drug and found positive results in early trial stages.

The drug appeared to be a potent inhibitor of Ebola virus replication in cell culture.

The U.S. FDA authorized its emergency use on Duncan since the compound had

been tested for human safety.

Unfortunately, the medication was unsuccessful in Duncan’s situation. He passed away on Wednesday, Oct. 8.

Doctors are now theorizing as to what factors could have prevented this medication’s success.

In addition, they are theorizing as to what could have happened had Duncan been treated earlier.

Medications, for example, are accompanied by many side effects.

These side effects might not have been tolerable in patients afflicted with the Ebola virus. It is, however, likely that brincidofovir will be tested

on other infected individuals.

Another drug called ZMapp made by Mapp Biopharmaceutical successfully treated earlier Ebola patients, including two U.S. aid workers.

Supplies of this drug ran out in August, but fortunately, they have reemerged with the help of former Microsoft chairman Bill Gates.

The Gates Foundation recently pledged $50 million to help combat the Ebola outbreak in an effort that includes the development of therapies and vaccines.

ZMapp is a combination of three monoclonal antibodies designed to bind and neutralize the Ebola virus. Kentucky

BioProcessing, Mapp’s current contract manufacturer, stated that supplies of the drug could be available within a few weeks to begin clinical trials in humans.

However, Mapps and other health experts think it is too soon to know whether ZMapp is an effective and safe treatment for humans infected with Ebola.

Initial testing trials in mice and monkeys infected with Ebola have shown that it can in fact reduce death rates.

However, clinical trials in humans are necessary in order to establish safety and efficacy.

Researchers are continuing to investigate the new drug.

U.S. Ebola Patient Dies, New DrugsTested Sue Tran Red&Black Contributor

The late Thomas Eric Duncan, the man who contracted the first confirmed case of Ebola in the United States, was treated in Dallas with an experimental drug made by biopharmaceutical company Chimerix Inc. The medication is called brincidofovir.

“We are hopeful that brincidofovir may offer a potential treatment for Ebola Virus Disease during this outbreak,” said Dr. Michelle Berrey, pres-

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LIFE 7

Red & Black

What is the Point of the First Lady?

Courtesy firstladies.org

Emily Bitting Red&Black Editor

With the fiftieth anniversary of Lady Bird Johnson's history-making southern campaign for her husband and media focus on Michelle Obama's run so far, The Atlantic's Scarlet Neath has brought up some important questions about what the role of a first lady (or first spouse) should be.

The bodies and fashion savvy of first ladies have always been held under media scrutiny, but steps have been made over the years to change

the position into something more. Neath described how Lady Bird Johnson's historic campaign was a major turning point for the standard political power a first lady could gain and wield, and also followed with speculation as to what the current first lady will do with her remaining time in office alongside her husband.

In many ways, it appears that the real problem with the point of the first lady is that there are no set rules, no set job description that everyone, or even anyone, can agree on.

The position of a first lady is just that - a position, a role.

It is not a paid job like the president's, so issues with what exactly should be or even needs to be in the role

description are fuzzy and unclear.

The public and media generally expect a first lady to support her husband, host various political dinners and events, campaign for charities and give up her former job, all without reaching too far past her position.

Michelle Obama hinted at keeping her job during President Obama's 2008 race, but ended up not doing so. Critics have frequently deplored her current position in the White House, saying that she may be holding her husband back by not challenging the role of first lady more.

Former first lady Laura Bush said recently in a

C-SPAN interview that it may take the first female president and first gentleman to change the ideas and rules surrounding the roles of first family members.

Bush was particularly intent on discussing matters of a first lady's career: "I think that's really the question we should ask, is should she have a career during those years that her husband is president in addition to serving as first lady?"

Neath also speculated that Hillary Clinton's possible presidential run could cause changes for the first lady/ gentleman position, but ultimately concluded that Hillary and Bill Clinton probably will not be the

couple to change the roles of the first couple.

"Instead of expecting one woman - or man - to revolutionize the office of the presidential spouse," said Neath, "perhaps it would be more productive to recognize how ill-suited the position is to the 21st century and come up with something else."

With so many calling for changes to the position and role of the presdential spouse, the White House might be in for some changes in the coming years. The position of chief of staff was only just created in 1946, so changes in the White House are not unheard of. The next presidential spouse might just change the role.

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Red & Black

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The Gender Politics of Pockets: Function Over Style?

Courtesy huffingtonpost.com

Shannon Adams Red&Black Staff Most women’s clothes these days are designed for style, not for practicality.

In order to achieve a stylish look, clothing designers will sometimes cut away parts of their designs that add unnecessary volume to the person wearing that article of clothing.

They believe that this takes away from the appeal of the outfit.

Women, look down at your pants. Now, tell me what they are missing. That’s right: pockets.

If you look over at your male friend’s pockets, you will most likely see that they

have neither disappeared nor shrunken in size. In fact, one male pocket is probably spacious enough to carry a small puppy.

Now look back down at your own pockets.

There is a very good chance that they are either fake pockets or those tiny pockets that can barely hold a credit card or the bottom half of your chapstick.

Of course, many argue that women have purses and therefore do not need pockets as large as their male counterparts.

But then the conversation turns to the topic of male purses... and we really do not want to go there.

Fashion designers no longer see pockets for women as

necessary for a few different reasons. First, as mentioned above, most women carry purses anyway.

Second, many women today believe that pockets - particularly large pockets - draw attention to and add bulk to their hips.

Because of this, designers have slowly but surely decreased the size of female pockets.

A few years ago, when “jeggings” (leggings that look like denim jeans) came out, many women had a problem with the fake pockets.

These pockets look real when the pants are on the hanger, and thus, many women do not notice that the pockets are fake until they wear them out for the first time. In

the store, these fake pockets look like any other pocket.

It is only when you try to stick your phone, your keys or some money into the pocket that you realize you have been tricked.

These fake pockets as well as the aforementioned toosmall-for-chapstick pockets have caused an uproar recently because of the release of the new iPhone 6.

This phone is much larger than the past models, and because of the decrease in their pocket sizes and - in some cases - elimination of pockets altogether, women are having a hard time finding a place to put these cellular devices.

They would not dare put them in their back pockets for fear that they will fall into the

toilet. The pockets inside purses that are cell phone-sized are sized for flip phones and smaller smart phone models, which fewer and fewer people are carrying anymore.

This means that women now have to throw their shiny new iPhone 6’s into the abyss es that are the main compartments of their purses to be lost forever and ever. What is a girl to do?

It seems that as a result of this uprising, designers are now looking into devices to attach to pants to hold large cell phones such as the iPhone 6.

One designer even talked about bringing fanny packs back.... but let’s all hope and pray that it does not come down to that.

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Red & Black

LIFE 9

Chinese Economy Beats U.S. In Terms of GDP

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Courtesy irishtimes.com

compared to the U.S. A meal at a relatively inexpensive restaurant in the U.S. costs Americans around $10. In China, however, it would cost approximately $3.75.

A bottle of Coke or Pepsi in the U.S. costs Americans around $1.62. In China, China’s economy has just surpassed that of the United States, making it the largsuch a purchase would only cost about $0.56. est economy in the world.

Basic monthly utilities in the U.S. cost around $160.22 compared to $55.25 The International Monetary Fund estimated as part of its World Economic in China.

Outlook that China’s gross doA report by the Peking Unimestic product (GDP) is now versity Institute of Social Sciworth $17.6 trillion while the A meal at a relatively inexpensive restaurant in the U.S. costs Amerence Survey concluded that U.S. GDP is worth $17.4 trillion. while the country is getting icans around $10.

In China, however, it would cost approximately This figure is expected to richer as a whole (the average increase even more in the near $3.75. net worth of a Chinese housefuture. hold has risen 17% between A bottle of Coke or Pepsi in the U.S. costs Americans around $1.62.

Economists have adjusted 2010 and 2012, making it now these figures for the relative cost In China, such a purchase would only cost about $0.56. about $71,000), inequality is a of living in both countries in orBasic monthly utilities in the U.S. cost around $160.22 compared to serious and growing problem. der to make fair, accurate comA third of the country’s $55.25 in China. parisons between the nations. wealth is now concentrated in This is also known as purthe hands of 1% of its citizens chasing power parity. while the poorest corner of Therefore, one trillion U.S. Chinese citizens owns only 1% of the country’s wealth. dollars are worth much more in China because, relatively speaking, it is cheaper China’s booming factory sector has caused its economy to expand rapidly. The to live in China than it is to live in the U.S. country also manipulates its currency to be worth much less than the U.S. dollar, According to Numbeo.com, the world’s largest database of user-contributed which helps its goods remain cheaper than U.S. goods on a global market. data about cities and countries worldwide, the cost of living in China is a bargain Sue Tran Red&Black Contributor

10 ARTS

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A R T S Red & Black

American Horror Story: Freakshow Lives Up to Expectations

Courtesy clevver.com

Courtesy starcasm.net

Diana Ciarallo Red&Black Staff

On Oct. 8, the long-awaited fourth season of American Horror Story made its debut. Written by series co-creators Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuck, the premiere, titled “Monsters Among Us,” offers viewers a glimpse inside Elsa Mars’ (Jessica Lange) struggling sideshow attraction- a depraved opera of camp, bad deeds and bizarre rarities; all with the setting of an “idyllic” little town in 1950’s Florida.

In the extended premiere, the writers set up this season’s struggles with the show’s very own signature style as fans are introduced to a fascinating cast of characters to marvel at, with the chief among them being Sara Paulson’s dual role as the conjoined twins Bette and Dot Tattler.

Bette and Dot’s narrative begins when they are implicated in the murder of their mother.

The resulting controversy attracts the attention of the fame-hungry Elsa, in desperate need of a headliner for her struggling carnival sideshow.

We are introduced to newly minted sideshow attractions Dot and Bette, conjoined twins with polar opposite personalities and suspect(s) in the killing their mother. They raise outlandish issues regarding their situation. Which twin killed the mother? In this case it seems Bette stabbed their mother in spite of

Courtesy usmagazine.com

Courtesy etonline.com

Dot’s attempt to stop it. Dot wants to retaliate by harming her sister but can’t do it without harming herself. We also meet many of the other carnies featured in this season like the bearded lady Ethel Darling (Kathy Bates) and her son Jimmy, who makes a bizarre side-living by pleasuring sexually unfulfilled homemakers with his perfectly suited, congenitally-malformed hands.

Then there’s Twisty the clown (played by John Carol Lynch). We’ve all heard of people with a clown phobia. Twisty is what they must be imagining. He is horrifying.

He captures children and terrorizes them. He is also a serial killer adding more stabbings to the story line.

Not long after Dot and Bette join the freak show, a police detective in charge of finding their mother’s killer tracks them down, with full intention of putting them under arrest, something that doesn’t sit well with Jimmy Darling, who winds up slitting the man’s throat after he hurls one too many insults and slurs at the group of misfits.

Tired of being treated like a freak, this proves to be the breaking point for Jimmy, going so far as to form a lynch mob made up of some of his fellow carnies, their first victim being the detective’s corpse.

This premiere has laid out the groundwork for a war in which the misfits and underdogs will rise.

We also still haven’t met a lot of big name cast members (Emma Roberts, Dennis O’ Hare, Michael Chilkis and Angela Bassett have yet to appear) and since this is reported to be Jessica Lange’s last season, we all might be in for something crazy as the dark happenings of this storyline begin to brew.

24 O ctober 2014

Eric Church Live at Consol Energy Center Nathan Kanuch Red&Black Staff

We all love music. And chances are, we all love many, many artists. As fans of music, however, it is hard to deny that we all have a favorite.

Each of us has probably connected to a specific artist through his or her albums, songs or concerts.

We see our favorite artists as a type of medication, capable of writing a soundtrack to our own lives. A beloved artist is there at both our highest and lowest moments.

The one such artist for me is Eric Church.

As a country music fan, I have been privileged to see fantastic artists from yesterday including Merle Haggard, Willie Nelson and Charlie Daniels.

I listen to their music and appreciate their work as country music legends. The unfortunate aspect, obviously, is their age.

I did not grow up with these artists in their prime. They were well established as legends and some of the greatest country artists of alltime.

The almost spiritual connection with music was not there. Acts like Nelson and Haggard seem almost unreal, as if they are “gods” of country music.

Those who are my age have not seen them grow and make it through the hard times of their careers.

In my case, the opposite is true regarding Eric Church. I have been a long-time fan since his first album.

I stuck with him when he was kicked off Rascal Flatts’ tour for playing too loud and long as an opening act.

I watched in awe as Church built a loyal fan base by playing small clubs and bars; he built a following the old-fashioned way.

His second album brought more acclaim, but he still did not receive attention from mainstream Nashville.

He had the reputation of doing things his way, playing loosely with the rules, a reputation

ARTS 11

Red & Black

P o e t r y Corner Diana Ciarallo Red&Black Contributor

“The Poet’s Rebirth in the Sea” Courtesy ourstage.com

he still enjoys today. When Church released “Chief,” his third album, Nashville was forced to take notice. He won awards and drew new fans to his music. By the time he released his critically acclaimed fourth album this past February, Church was a superstar who established himself by doing it his own way. He is truly an outsider in every sense of the word.

This brings us to his concert at Consol Energy Center this past Saturday. Church sold out the arena and was quite awestruck at the scene.

He remembered drawing around 25 fans to Mr. Smalls (local students understand) the first time he played in Pittsburgh.

Church played for over two hours, mixing in songs from each of his albums including hit singles like “Drink in My Hand” and little known (but to his fans) album cuts like “Carolina.”

It truly hit me during his performance of “Sinners Like Me” that I was witnessing my musical hero at last.

For me, it’s Eric Church. For someone else, the artist may be from an entirely different genre.

But as Church concluded the evening with “Springsteen,” he spoke words that all can identify with.

He said that as a young adult, he was at a concert where the music just clicked. To this day, when he hears that specific song, he is taken back to that very night and those very memories. Isn’t that the true meaning of music?

To die or be cured from loveLife and passion both cleansed away by the ocean’s foam.

She lays still on the rockWhere land meets the seaAnd her lyre lies broken beside her, while her words and lyrics lay still on her tongue.

The gentle foam has given new life to the poet SapphoA siren, so fairTo charm the maidens into the sea, So that the men’s bones may have company.

Courtesy gallery.yopriceville.com

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Walking Dead Returns for Fifth Season Cody Streussnig Red&Black Staff

The Walking Dead is back as season five premiered Sunday night at 9 p.m. on AMC. The Walking Dead has been a hit since it premiered back in 2010.

It has been a ratings phenomenon since the beginning with season four being the most-watched drama in basic cable history.

The Walking Dead has changed the American culture by drawing viewers in to a gory show centering on zombies that is riveting and heartbreaking; viewers really connect with the characters.

The past season (season four) was focused on reuniting characters at a town called Terminus, a stronghold with signs posted along railroad tracks.

The season ended with most of the cast reunited, though they were trapped in a train car as the citizens of Terminus outside prepared to harvest their bodies for meat.

Watching their beloved characters trapped and in danger, fans are facing the sad reality that their favorites, if not everyone, might die. Luckily for

viewers, season five picks up where season four ended. Rick is on the chopping block where the inhabitants of Terminus may kill him for his flesh.

Carole saves the day by leading a large group of walkers toward the town where they broke through the gates.

This all occurs while Tyreese cares for Judith in a log cabin while he detains one of the guards of Terminus.

Glenn dies as the man with the baseball hits his head while the other man cuts his throat.

The entirety of the episode is based around breaking out of the fortress and reuniting the group safely.

It was a dazzling, adrenaline-rush filled with suspense, righteous violence and, before it’s all over, genuine emotion.

It seems that the creators of the Walking Dead are shooting for the moon as they are pulling out all the stops.

They highlight the tough decisions characters in these positions must deal with and question whether killing other humans is acceptable.

This is already proving to be a great fifth season of the Walking Dead.

Courtesy mic.com

Super Spooky Halloween Adventures

Cody Streussnig Red&Black Staff It’s hard trying to find something to do in the weeks leading up to Halloween weekend? Pittsburgh and its surrounding areas have tons of activities to do if you are in the mood for a little scaring and some pulse pounding fun these are some great options: Everyone from the Pittsburgh knows about Kennywood. If you are not from this area, Kennywood is our local amusement park with tons of fun rides and great food.

Well it’s the time of the year for “Fright Night” were Kennywood turns into a frightening version of what we know our amusement park is supposed to look like. “Fight Night” is on Friday and Saturday nights.

College students can get into the park for half the price ($16.50) on October 12 and 31 and November 1 if you show your student ID when buying the ticket.

If you need to drive to Kennywood it is about a 45 minute drive from campus.

If you go expect there to be long lines, but they are well worth it.

The best ride at Kennywood is the phantom’s revenge, the ride is very smooth and is a longer ride which is uncommon for most amusement parks. The Next location is known as the “Scarehouse,” which is located in Pittsburgh. The

Courtesy yajagoff.com

“Scarehouse” has been around for 100 years. There are 4 parts of the house The Summoning, The Pittsburgh Zombie: Black Out, Creepo’s Christmas 3D, and the Basement each with its on frights and horrors.

On Thursday and Sunday are college days you save $7 dollars off of general admission tickets by ordering online and using the Promo code STUDYBREAK (use all caps).

College students must show their valid college ID at the door or they will be required to pay the difference. The “Scarehouse” is open Saturday and Friday from 7pm to 12am and Thursday and Sunday from 7pm to 10pm.

You must park at Pittsburgh Zoo: 7340 Butler Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15206 from this location the “Scarehouse” will shuttle you to their location for free.

There are many places to go and things to do, and finding the right thing for you is easy.

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Red & Black

ARTS 13

Everyone's All Time Favorite Halloween Movies

r

Hocus Pocus - Courtesy babble.com Beetlejuice - Courtesy blogs.indiewire.com Jack - Courtesy icarly.wikia.com Halloween - Courtesy hngn.com Charlie Brown - Courtesy afunpictures.com Halloweentown - Courtesy blogherald.com

Cody Streussnig Red&Black Contributor

It’s Halloween time and that means candy, costumes, and of course scary movies.

The weather is also changing outside and if you’re trying to find something to do until Halloween night these movies with excite your senses.

People everywhere remember when they were kids sitting in front of the TV and watching the Disney channel.

The first movie is “Halloweentown”, a movie about a town with every ghosts, witches, and talking skeletons. This is not a scary movie, but one that you can cuddle up to your sweetheart and remember your childhood.

Another movie that is from the Disney is “Hocus Pocus,” a classic movie about a Halloween in Salem, Mass., three witches are accidentally awakened when a boy tries to impress the girl of his dreams by lighting a candle which awakens their worst fears. Now if a person wants to get really nostalgic they could watch

“It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown,” which is on October 15 at 8:30 p.m. on WTAE. Now for the scary movies. For a really scary movie it most have these three things: 1.

Is the movie so scary that it changes ones behavior?

2.

Does the movie have a high likelihood of producing nightmares?

3.

Does the movie startle you, make you anxious, get your heart pumping, or just plain gross you out.

The least scariest movie of the short list is Beetlejuice. This movie is a Halloween classic, the characters are really unique and so is the plot line.

Next, is Physco although the movie starts slow, unlike other movies the author kills off the main character in the first 20 minutes, and it has a great plot twist.

Some other other great scary movies are Scream, Halloween, The Nightmare before Christmas, and Six Sense. The movie that will strike fear into your heart is “It”. The movie is one the scariest movies ever made and blows away those three parameters. No person with a grave fear of clowns, but if you are not this movie will have you glued to the screen.

There are many scary movies in the world, but not like the movies listed above they will shock and stun you.

14 OPINIONS

OPINIONS Red & Black

24 O ctober 2014

Pennsylvania American Water

Josephine Posti

Pennsylvania American Water T: 724.743.3013 M: 412.667.1479 josephine.posti@amwater.com

Press Release

LOCAL COLLEGES COMPETE IN PENNSYLVANIA AMERICAN WATER’S “UTAP CHALLENGE” HERSHEY, Pa. (October 7, 2014) – Colleges and universities from across the commonwealth hope people “Like” them on Facebook to win a new, convenient device for filling reusable bottles with cool refreshing water. Eight schools in Pennsylvania American Water’s service area are competing in the “UTap Challenge,” a Facebook contest that will award the top vote-getter with an Elkay water fountain bottle filler to help cut down on plastic bottled water waste. Facebook users can vote once each day between October 7 and October 31, for their favorite college or university. From Pennsylvania American Water’s Facebook page at www. facebook.com/pennsylvaniaamwater, users can click “Vote” to see a list of participating schools and short descriptions of where on campus their bottle fillers will be installed, if awarded. “Students are looking for an inexpensive and convenient way to fill water bottles on the go rather than generating waste and spending a lot of money on bottled water,” said Pennsylvania American Water President Kathy L. Pape.

“The UTap Challenge will offset the cost of installing a water fountain bottle filler on the winner’s campus, which benefits students, faculty and staff as well as the environment.” Participating schools are: California University - Washington County; Clarion University - Clarion County; Community College of Allegheny County; Lebanon Valley College - Lebanon County; Lackawanna College - Lackawanna County; Montgomery County Community College; University of Scranton - Lackawanna County and Washington & Jefferson College - Washington County. The top vote-getting grant winner will be announced in early November. Pennsylvania American Water, a subsidiary of American Water (NYSE: AWK), is the largest water utility in the state, providing high-quality and reliable water and/or wastewater services to approximately 2.1 million people. Founded in 1886, American Water is the largest publicly traded U.S. water and wastewater utility company. With headquarters in Voorhees, N.J., the company employs approximately 6,600 dedicated professionals who provide drinking water, wastewater and other related services to an estimated 14 million people in more than 40 states and parts of Canada. More information can be found by visiting www.amwater.com.

E ditorial P olicy The Red & Black is the official, registered student-produced newspaper of Washington & Jefferson College. It is published Thursdays with the exception of exams and break periods.

Editorials are based upon the opinion of the respective writers and do not necessarily reflect the views of the newspaper, the

College or its students, faculty, or administration.

The Red & Black welcomes all reader contributions, but reserves the right to reject letters of pure promotional nature, as well as letters which do not meet its standard of integrity, accuracy and decency.

The Red & Black also reserves the right to edit submissions.

Letters are due on the Monday before publication and may not exceed 600 words. All letters must include the author’s name, campus box and telephone number.

Names may be withheld upon request under certain conditions on rare occasions. All letters may be submitted to redandblackstaff@jay. washjeff.edu.

C ontac t Telephone: FAX: E-mail: Mailing Address:

(724) 223-6049 (724) 503-1049 redandblackstaff@jay. washjeff.edu Red & Black 60 S.Lincoln St. Washington, PA 15301

24 O ctober 2014

OPINIONS 15

Red & Black

Anonymous Bliss: Yik Yak’s Presence on College Campuses Brittany Graft Red&Black editor A trendy new app that everyone on campus seems to be using is Yik Yak. Yik Yak allows people to post basically whatever and can be seen by people within a 10 mile radius.

Every post is anonymous, so with anonymity comes mean comments.

You can view other areas but cannot comment on them.

There is also a feature that allows you to “up” or “down” a post.

If it get a lot of “ups” it can make it on the hot list, but if it goes too far into the negatives, it will get deleted.

Schools across the country are beginning to ban the app due to the hate comments

people are making on it.

Here at W&J, we too have an interesting Yik Yak. Whether it’s about being lonely, the food here or something else to complain about, everyone seems to have one thing to Yak about.

However, it gets very hasty sometimes with hurtful, demeaning, racial or homophobic comments.

Some posts are just down right mean.

Others are about what occurs here on the weekends, and no one has any shame since it’s all anonymous.

Freshman, Tulip Serbin, loves the app.

She said, “I think the app is a lot of fun, but there are a lot of posts that get taken way too far. But all in all, I enjoy it!” Yik Yak is causing a lot of

controversy, and personally I can see why. I’m on Yik Yak all the time.

I usually get pretty entertained by what is said, but some of the posts are really hurtful, especially the ones directed to a certain person.

It is basically anonymous cyberbullying. I’ve heard rumors of the app being deleted from the App Store, which is completely understandable.

I do love using the app, but not to hurt people.

Just a word of the wise, use the app I mean it is fun, but think about what you are saying.

Do not say anything you wouldn’t want to be said about you. Stay classy and happy Yakking!

utica.edu

Yik Yak, an annoymous social media app, launched in 2013, but has gained popular across college campuses within the last few months.

Health Insurance Now Provided at Wal-Mart Siddhanta Bista Red&Black Staff

When in doubt, Wal-Mart always has what you are looking for.

If you happen to be in search of health-insurance, you will now be able to find it there as well! Wal-mart, an American multinational retail corporation operates with chains of departmental and warehouse stores., was founded in 1962 by Sam Walton.

It has over 11,000 stores in 27 different countries. According to the Fortune 500

Global list, Walmart is known to be the world’s largest company by revenue, the biggest private employer and the largest retailer.

As the world’s largest retailer and private employer, Walmart is on a new path of getting into the Health Insurance Business.

Walmart plans on working with the the directhealth. com, an online health insurance comparison website and agency.

It allows customers to compare and contract coverage options and enroll into a medical plan that best suits

them."For years, our customers have told us that there is too much complexity when it comes to understanding their health insurance options," said Labeed Diab, president of Wal-Mart's (WMT) health & wellness unit.

Furthermore, he stated that, “more than 60 percent of people have difficulty understanding their health insurance options and nearly 40 percent feel they picked the wrong plan after enrollment”.

This new plan by Walmart is primarily targeted towards people who have been confused with their enrollment

process and about their health insurance plan. “Healthcare Begins Here”, the name of the program, is available for customers to enroll into- through either the phone or online, beginning October 10th.

The health insurance program works in the way that, for customers that are over the age of 65- the directhealth. com offers access to more than 1700 plans from various carriers such as, UniteHealthcare, Humana, Cigna and Atena during the Medicare open enrollment period starting from October 15th through December 7th. For customers

under the age of 65, the health insurance program varies in the fact that, directhealth.com offers access to thousands of health exchange plans from more than 300 carriers.

There are more options here and the enrollment period beings November 15th through February 15th.

In this plan, Walmart will not be receiving commissions on health coverage sales and hopes to benefit primarily by luring customers into the stores.

Walmart plans to launch TV, radio and in-store promotions campaign this month.

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Red & Black

24 O ctober 2014

Death-with-Dignity Program Provides Assisted Suicide to Terminally Ill Shannon Adams Red&Black Staff

People are diagnosed with life threatening illness every single day.

Some of them are given a life expectancy of 6 months or less with their illness.

This is that happened to Brittany Maynard on New Year’s Day of this year.

She was diagnosed with a brain tumor.

She went through two surgeries to try to stop the tumor from growing with no luck.

The tumor came back at full force.

She was told that her only option was full brain radiation, which would leave her with no hair, first degree burns, and

still eventual death. This is not was completely certain that shortens their life span to six what she wanted for the rest this is what she wanted to do, months or less. If they qualify of her time her on Earth. She’s they packed up and moved to they have to have a physician been married for about a year Oregon, one of the three states fill a prescription for the drug and was just starting to create that the Death-with-Dignity that will take their life when a family of her own. act has been passed. they are ready.

She looked into options They took residency in When the patient feels that that would the pain is too much not hinder for them her quality of I think that Death-with Dignity is a to handle life for her last six months and wonderful program because it gives people they can take their cause her family on to watch her 29 the option to live the rest of their time with life their own year old body their loved ones doing what they want to time. suffer while her When mind is being do.

I read taken over by Brittany’s the cancer. story I was She looked completely into Deathwith-Dignity, an assisted suicide program that Portland and applied to the heartbroken and had to see program. The program is her progress with the decision is legal in three states.

Brittany and her husband only good for patients who so I followed a link to her blog.

She has recently filled her lived in California when they have been diagnosed with a found this out. Once Brittany life threatening illness that prescription and with that,

she feels a sense of relief.

She is planning on taking her own life shortly after her husband’s birthday on October 26. I think that Death-with-Dignity is a wonderful program because it gives people the option to live the rest of their time with their loved ones doing what they want to do.

They don’t have to spend their last months in a hospital or a hospice condemned to a bed and being pumped with morphine that no longer takes the pain away.

This program gives the chance to accept their bad news, get over it, and live their life until they feel like it is time to go.

I believe we should all have that choice, the choice to decide when to pull our own plug, and that is exactly what Brittany is doing.

The Cost of Fear: Ebola Prevention Costs Exceed $32 Billion Cody Streussnig Red&Black Contributor

The World Bank fears that the Ebola virus could lead to a catastrophic economic effects exceeding 32 billion dollars.

The fear of Ebola is spreading much faster than the disease itself.

Already in the West African region farmers are abandoning their land, and

local authorities are restricting the shipments of goods.

The interesting question here is: Is fighting the Ebola virus worth the cost and should we fight it?

First, the Ebola Virus, formerly known as Ebola hemorrhagic fever, is a severe, often fatal illness in humans.

The virus is transmitted to people from wild animals, and spreads in the human population through humanto-human contact.

The average Ebola case fatality

rate is around 50%. So far there have been 8,399 cases of Ebola and 4,033 deaths most occurring in West Africa.

If and I only say If the disease is contained to West Africa this question will be a simple one.

Contain the disease and let the drug companies find a suitable drug to fight and eliminate the threat.

The real problem comes when cross out of Africa and into the rest of the world.

With countries sending aid

and health workers to the region to help slow the disease down they have in fact created a wider problem of when their own people get infected what do they do?

Well the United States has adopted the policy as always bring its people home which is bringing sick Ebola patience into the country to treat.

Which is giving U.S. citizens the idea that this virus could spread through the people we bring back. So the real solution is not to blindly

throw money at this problem, it’s how effetely we use the resources we have.

The United States and other countries must put their resources into finding a cure or some sort of therapy to fight this deadly virus because sooner or later it will spread into other nations.

They must also quell the fear that this outbreak is causing since fear itself is a lot worse than what this virus can do to the world, when society breaks down nature wins.

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OPINIONS 17

Red & Black

What Does Our Use of Language Say About Us?

Courtesy blog.oxforddictionaries.com

Brittany Graft Red&Black Editor

The suffix “-ish” has been around for centuries.

It’s a part of many words such as “bookish”, “sheepish” and even “English.”

However, recently, it seems we use it on a daily basis.

It’s accepted now by society to basically make any word have an “-ish.”

For example, one will say: “Oh, it’s fall-ish out.”

This basically means that the weather has all the characteristics of fall.

We’ve made the suffix very purposeful and it definitely

can ease awkward conversation. It is now even the focus of a television show.

The new ABC show ‘Black-

that they are not really going to change and gets that they are ‘Black-ish.’

It’s said the suffix is a great

pletely pinned down to what we say. I personally use it all the time.

The ish phenomenon has

We look for our language to be as flexible and free as possible. We use it to express ourselves without being completely pinned down to what we say. ish’ is about an African American man who has an extreme anxiety about his family losing their culture and heritage after they move to an almost entirely white, upper-middleclass neighborhood.

He tries to bring back the ‘black’ in them, but realizes

way to describe our commitment-phobic age of society.

It’s a quick and easy way to extend deadlines and make plans. We look for our language to be as flexible and free as possible.

We use it to express ourselves without being com-

taken over.

I don’t necessarily think it’s bad but we do use it a lot sometimes.

Unlike other suffixes such as –esque or –oid, we use –ish much more, but is it really because we do not want to commit to something? Or is it just

because we do not need to be so definite all the time? I honestly think it’s more of a fear of saying something that could prove you wrong.

I think we have this fear that if we are wrong about something, it will be embarrassing.

And no one enjoys being embarrassed.

The suffix forgives any imprecision.

We use it the same way as ‘like’; again to avoid being incorrect. It seems that everyone uses the term for every use they can find.

The suffix “-ish” has colonized our society as we know it, and it is just becoming even more useful-ish.

18 The SUPERBURGER “Special Double-Patty Edition!”

Red & Black

24 O ctober 2014

Weather: A Look at W&J’s Seven-Month Weather Forecast Thomas Marcotte Red&Black Editor

Thank you for reading the Superburger, your 100% trustworthy guide through the more unusual aspects of W&J campus life!

As is tradition this time of year, the Superburger will, in the interests of preparation, be presenting our yearly weather forecast for the next seven months of your stay here on our fabulous campus.

We would prefer you to think of us as your trustworthy farmer’s almanac, only even more trustworthy, and with fewer tips on distilling whiskey. Don’t blame us, it’s merely school policy.

With that said, please pay attention for your sevenmonth weather forecast: --During October, expect wind and cold rain.

Temperatures will drop to that insidious degree where it’s too cold to open the window, but still too warm to turn on the heat. Meteorologists refer to this as the temperature’s “Quads Point.”

--In November, expect very cold rain and wind, with some minor flooding. By “minor,” of course, we refer to the way South Lincoln Street becomes a stretch of whitewater rapids. Umbrellas, rain boots, and collapsible boats are encouraged. Ugg boots are not.

--December will bring along with it some very, very cold rain, otherwise known as snow. Students walking

too close to Upper class Hall should be wary of steam from the pipe vents spontaneously freezing in midair and dropping on their heads. We wish we were joking.

--During January, there will be more snow, along with arctic winds and freezing rain. Be on the lookout for bored intersession students playing the classic W&J wintertime game, Laugh-atthe-Freshmen-Slipping-onthe-Field-of-Ice-OutsideSwanson. Campus and Public Safety’s legendary Saint Bernards can be seen prowling the campus, digging out students who become trapped in the six-foot snowdrifts.

Between the burning rock salt on the roads (on a good day), the face-chapping cold, and the ever-present danger of frostbite, dry skin is the biggest complaint this time of year. After avalanches, of course. Remember not to eat the yellow snow.

--Once February hits, the sun will be expected to taunt us, occasionally peeking out from behind the clouds to laugh at students cursing out the snow. There’s no use complaining; after all the taunting we put in over intersession, we absolutely deserve it. But soon the sun will get bored with this game and leave to go back to watching House of Cards on Netflix for the next few months.

--For March, expect high winds and cold rain, followed by even higher winds. The

soil finally gives up and turns into dangerous patches of thick, glue-like mud. Many students treat the mud as a minor annoyance. This mud is more dangerous than it looks, however: scientists speculate that it is actually a new, previously-undiscovered form of super-quicksand.

Every year, a handful of students are sucked under into the mud, never to be heard from again. The official story is that these students all transferred out, but we at the Superburger know better than to trust The Man. Use the buddy system when walking across campus to avoid becoming another statistic.

--Next comes April, during which W&J experiences a special treat: the rain becomes warmer for a month. The constant patter of water on students’ necks feels less like a melting ice cube and more like a dog’s drool.

--Eventually, however, the sun wakes up from his couch and realizes with a shock that he’s late for work, and shows up just in time for a sunny, humid May that makes a day in the Amazon feel like stepping into a walkin freezer.

Thank you for your time.

Hopefully the next seven months will be safe and happy, meteorologically speaking, of course. And remember: with proper preparation, any bad weather can be dealt with.

Please refer to this handy guide for all your future weather forecasting needs.

Courtesy illinoisphotos.com

Above, residents of Washington County drive to work on a perfectly ordinary November morning.

Courtesy dailydawdle.com

The eternal battle of Man vs. Snowdrift plays out every year on the path through the Quads.

24 O ctober 2014

Red & Black

The SUPERBURGER 19 “Special Double-Patty Edition!”

New Study Suggests Upperclass Mostly Made Of Balsa Wood and Q-Tips Katherine Campbell Red&Black Staff

Many of us know the dorm Upperclass not by its given name, but by its affectionate nickname, Uppertrash. For researchers G. Jefferson and T. Washington, the area of interest was not why the dorm was trash, but rather what was in the trash.

The materials holding the old dorm together were originally brought into question when a strong gust of wind nearly blew over the dorm.

G. Jefferson and T. Washington were called to investigate Upperclass shortly after sus-

picions were formed as to the stability of the building.

Jefferson and Washington took water fountains, paper towel holders and exit signs off of walls, tore into doors and ripped wiring out of the building in an attempt to determine what exactly was holding the dorm together.

After taking observations from the building and running a full-scale analysis on the materials that they found holding together the building, they determined that Upperclass is held together mostly with balsa wood and old Q-tips. No word yet on how precisely the wood is held

together, although some have speculated that chewing gum may take the place of nails.

For some, the results of the study came as no surprise. For several years now, high numbers of students housed in Upperclass have been reporting missing Q-tips.

In fact, missing Q-tips are the second most reported missing items right behind singular socks.

Some people believe that the maintenance workers have been collecting the Q-tips and have been stuffing them into cracks in the walls, lining the floors with them, and generally using them to fix whatever

note saying what laundry detergent you used just in case they have an allergy.

3. Pack them a lunch when they go to work. Brown paper bags with a note or a picture drawn on the front works best.

4. When your roommate goes to take a shower, bring him/her an extra towel. Knock on the door three times before you enter, close your eyes and talk very loudly so they know that you are there.

5.When your roommate leaves for class, be sure to check their desk to make sure that they did not forget anything important. If they did, try to catch up to them. If you cannot catch up to them, enter their class and draw as much attention to yourself as possible while casually sneaking your roommate the book they

forgot so no one realizes that they forgot it.

6. Call your roommate’s mom once a week and assure her that her little angel is fine and that you are taking great care of him/her.

7. Develop a secret language with your roommate so that you guys can talk without your roommate’s friends understanding what you are saying. Give each other codenames, too.

8. Offer to carry your roommate's books if you guys are going the same direction.

Be sure to make puppy-dog eyes at them the whole time so they always know you care.

9. Clearly label what in the room is yours and what is your roommate’s so that there is no confusion. I've found that big, brightly-colored

they have found to be falling apart in the dorm.

It is not known where the balsa wood holding the building together came from and none of the missing socks were found holding the building together.

Some theorists believe that the missing socks were sucked into a portal which relocated them to the third floor of the Tech Center.

In light of the results of the study, new safety precautions have been put in place in Upperclass dorm. Students have been encouraged to stay silent while in the dorm and their movement within the dorm

has been limited to one bathroom run and one trip in and out of the door per day to reduce the amount of strain and vibrations the building has to withstand.

Students have also been encouraged to leave offerings of fresh hamburgers and Halloween candy in the hallways to keep up the maintenance workers' morale.

Finally, in the event of a gust of wind exceeding 4.72 mph, students have been instructed at the sound of a siren to grab onto the nearest wall and hold as many pieces of the wall as they can together and in an upright position.

How to Be, Like, the Bestest Roommate. Like, Evar.

Shannon Adams Red&Black Staff

It’s never too late to become a better roommate. I have been researching and observing my roommate for the past couple weeks, and I think I have complied the best list of tips possible to improve your relationship with your roommate.

1. Make your roommate's bed while he/she is at class.

Make sure you leave a treat on their pillow like the maids do at hotels. This gives them something to look forward to when they climb into bed after a long day of class.

2. Your roommate is a busy person, so they might not have time to do their laundry every week. Make sure you do theirs with yours, fold it nicely, and place their clothes back in the appropriate drawers, with a

Courtesy huffingtonpost.com

Whn you and your roommate are best friends, you can do anything! High Five!

Sharpies are best for doing this.

10. Leave a schedule including where and when you will be every day on your roommate’s desk so that they know where you will be every minute of every day. Also include a list of emergency numbers in case of an emer-

gency. You should also make a list of what counts as an emergency just to make sure there is no confusion.

It's always important to be a considerate roommate. With these tips at your disposal, you and your roommate should be best friends by the end of the week!

24 O ctober 2014

SPORTS 20

Red & Black

Freshman Athlete Spotlight: Jake Paradise, Catcher Brittany Graft Red&Black Editor

Jake Paradise is a freshman baseball player for Washington and Jefferson. He comes from a town not too far from Pittsburgh. He is a catcher for the team. Paradise intends on majoring in math as well.

This week, I had the opportunity to sit down with him and discuss what it’s like to be a part of the team and find out a little about him.

Q: Jake, how have you been?

A: Great, just peachy.

Q: That’s good to hear.

Our readers are interested in knowing more about freshman athletics. So, to start, I just have a few basic questions. How has your freshman year been going so far? Are

you enjoying your first few months as a W&J freshman?

A: It’s good, I’ve had a lot of fun.

Q: Great! How long have

favorite sport, or were there others?

A: Football every year, and basketball freshman year.

Yeah, I loved baseball from

week in preparation for the spring season. I am basically doing something for it every week day to get ready. Our fall season just recently ended.

“I’ve been just lifting and conditioning throughout the week in preparation for the spring season. I am basically doing something for it every weekday to get ready for spring.”

— Jake Paradise

you been playing baseball?

A: A long time. In fact, I’ve been playing ever since I was three years old.

Q: Wow. So did you play other sports in high school?

Was baseball your always your

when I was little, and I did not want to give it up.

Q: That’s really great. Can you describe what you’re currently doing in baseball?

A: I’ve been just lifting and conditioning throughout the

Q: And how was the fall season?

A: It was great, and easy. I had to learn all of the plays, and get my feet wet on how W&J baseball is. We had a lot of inner-squad scrimmages

and played a few other schools for practice games. I really enjoyed it.

Q: Sounds nice. Any predictions for the spring season?

What are your goals right now as a program?

A: The goal is to win the PAC and get to the NCAA tournament. I have confidence that we can make it.

Q: Awesome. So how is the team dynamic? Do you think you really fit in well with the team?

A: Yeah, everyone is really nice and welcoming. We have a lot of fun together. I absolutely love it!

Q: Well, thank you for your time and participating in the interview Jake. I really appreciate you taking the time to talk with us.

A: No problem at all!

W&J Men’s Water Polo: A Tournament in Pictures Thomas Marcotte Red&Black Editor Men’s water polo at W&J has made an excellent showing of itself this year. Coming back from its recent successful tournament trip to California earlier in the month, the Presidents split a pair of home games for the first round of the Collegiate Water Polo Association Division III Championship.

The round opened with a win for the Presidents, 19-13 over Monmouth.

However, the day was not a complete success, as the men lost to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology team in a 17-8 loss later that same

afternoon, leaving the Presidents seeded third in the tournament overall.

In the Monmouth game, W&J commanded an early lead. The first half ended with the scoreboard at 11-4 in the Presidents’ favor, which held up well into the second. Monmouth came as close as 14-10 by the end of the fourth quarter, but was never able to pull off a lead, allowing W&J to pull off a win.

MIT was held to a 2-2 tie in the first quarter, but the Engineers soon broke away, scoring eight consecutive goals.

The Presidents will play fourth-seeded Connecticut next on the 19th.

Courtesy Laura Taylor

Courtesy Laura Taylor

Courtesy Laura Taylor

Courtesy Laura Taylor