Pattaya Living - April 2013 by Pattaya Property Consultants

pattaya living

a supplement of real estaTe magazine Photo by PeterKraemer

No 28 • april 2013

it’s songkran! load up and prepare to fire events & promotions • quiz • health matters • attractions & golf • bars & restaurants

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Mixed Songkran feelings Songkran will soon be upon us with its usual mix of joy and upsets – people being drowned in a nice way and others getting hurt on the back of consuming too much ‘fire water’. For some it’s a time to get out of Pattaya – and quick ; others flock here and just love it! I’ve been here several years now but still don’t quite know what to make of Songkran. I won’t go on about the drinking aspects of it as I believe people in glass houses shouldn’t! Nor will I pontificate overly about the craziness of lobbing so much water away in a country where water shortages are common. Though it is crazy! What I do want to call for (and yes, I fully expect my plea to be ignored) is that this Songkran time people show a little more restraint about who they do – or don’t – deluge with water. A while ago a friend told me about an acquaintance who almost got into a fight because he was drenched after getting out of his car to attend a business meeting. He was not amused and let it be known, but got a response suggesting he was wrong to be upset. I can see both sides to this argument but confess that I come down on the side of the man attending a meeting. If you are out on business and reasonably smartly dressed you are not ready for water fight frolics and Songkran devotees should know that. Last Songkran I went to one of my favourite bars to take part in the festivities. I dressed in T-shirt and swimming trunks so I was ready. I entered the bar totally unscathed and was just about to claim how clever I was to avoid a drenching when one of the ladies working there promptly drowned me in ice cold water. I know it was that cold because the ice was still in it. Nice girl! Happy and safe Songkran everyone!

Dave Buckley

Managing Director, Pattaya Property Consultants, publishers of REm

All photos courtesy of mydestination.com/pattaya

pattaya LIVING

mid-month edition of

REALESTATE ine magaz

e v e n t s / p r o m o t i o n s

Dan Cheeseman is co-founder and director of Choice Group Asia and Inspire-eMagazine.com. Previously he has worked in other forms of media in the city. Before coming to Thailand he spent 10 years with Coca-Cola Enterprises in various sales and marketing positions before going on to work in a consultancy capacity, developing business propositions essentially with the Post Office Ltd in the UK during its transition from being Government-owned to becoming a more commercial proposition.

Upwardly mobile! S(ee)MS we can’t live without our phones

‘‘

By dan cheeseman

I often joke with my friends when I am out with them that I would have a better chat with them if I texted them.

’’

here is no doubting the range of activities and things to do here in Pattaya from dining out, nightlife to sporting activities, yet even with all this stimulus on offer why do we continue to live our lives glued to our mobile phones? I have even turned it in to somewhat of a game wherever I go, the challenge is to find a group next to me in a bar or restaurant where less that 40 per cent have a mobile phone in their hand. It is absolutely amazing how this phenomenon has occurred as quickly as it has; Go back no more than three or four years and this problem did not exist. The birth of the Smartphone and Tablets, designed to make us more social and accessible, has actually become a social disaster. I often joke with my friends when I am out with them that I would have a better chat with them if I texted them. Last Sunday I sat in ‘La Baguette’ coffee shop in Naklua enjoying a coffee and cake, sat next to me were a group of five fairly young Bangkok Thais.

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Every single one of them were actively engaged on their mobile phones, some were texting while others were eagerly taking photos of the cakes in front of them, I imagine, with the intention of sharing these photos on their social networks. It just felt wrong, as if that very moment they had in front of them was being wasted due to their love affairs with their phones. Core part of lifestyles The debate on the mobile phone is very appropriate to this lifestyle publication as the phone is now a fundamental part to most people’s lifestyles; I could even go as far as to suggest it is the core part of most people’s lifestyles. I have a love and hate relationship with the trusty mobile as I, too, fall

victim to this addiction, from the moment I wake up and check the news or football results to last thing at night when I give Facebook one last browse. It’s the reason why my Inspire eMagazine has an APP launching this month (April), if we choose to live our lives through a phone then a service needs to exist while we are out and about to show us what is going on around us. It will even immediately recognise the venue they are sitting in and send them all the information from promotions to video reviews of where they are sitting. If you can’t beat them, join them being very much the strategy! But, as I sit and watch others play with their phones when out, I cannot help thinking this cannot continue. It just isn’t right that we should be so reliant on a small electronic item, so much so that it compromises the time we spend with others (yet if we are talking to them via the phone we give them our attention). It’s very odd, yet this is where we are. I just wonder what things will be like in a few years…

repeat from last issue

L O C A L

a t t r ac t i o n s

Bira International Circuit: is the only internationally certified racetrack in Thailand. Its extensive facilities include a full-service karting track, an off-road test track, and the FIA certified 2.41km racetrack. It can be found about 15 km away on the Pattaya-Rayong Road (Highway 36). Tel: 022 803 547/025 221 731/8 Flight of the Gibbon: this attraction is ranked highly on the Trip Advisor website list of things to do. Cheap it isn’t but most of the reviews rate the experience and commend the safety measures employed. It can be found close to Khao Kheow Zoo. Tel: 0899 70 55 11 or visit website www.treetopasia.com

drive from central Pattaya. It features an exotic zoo, and crocodile, fire-swallowing and magic shows, as well as the garden and stone park. Open 8.0018:30. Tel: 03824 9347-9 or www. thaistonepark.org for information. Mini Siam: is on Sukhumvit Road, surrounded by Soi 33. This model village celebrates the heritage of Thailand with miniature replicas of the most famous monuments and historical sites. Replicas of Tower Bridge, Eiffel Tower, the Statue of Liberty and Trevi Fountain are also displayed. There is a small go-kart track. Open daily from 7.00-22.00. Tel: 038 421 628 for information.

Here we list just a few of the things tourists and expats can do to make their time here more enjoyable ...

Pattaya Park and Tower: at Pratumnak features a large whirlpool with giant sliders and a tower with a revolving restaurant. Visitors can also enjoy several games and rides on the tower and in its playground. Open daily from 10.00-19.00 (20.00 on Saturday). Tel: 03836 4110-20 or 02579 9612-4 or www.pattayapark.com for more information. Ripley’s Believe It Or Not Museum: on the third floor of Royal Garden Plaza. Access from both Second Road and Beach Road. Open daily 11.00-23.00. Tel: 03871 0294/8.

repeat from last issue

Khao Chi Chan: etched and filled with gold leaf, this Buddha is more than 100 metres high and is thought to be the largest such image in the world. Next to Silver Lakes Vineyard which is also worth a visit.

Khao Kheow Open Zoo: 35 km north of Pattaya. A huge zoo with many animals that are on the endangered species list including six rare white tigers exchanged by the Memphis Zoo in the USA. Open daily 08:00-18:00. Tel: 038 298 188.

Koh Larn: is reached by ferry from Bali Hai pier or by speedboat. It has several beaches boasting white sand and clear blue water. The many activities include para sailing, snorkeling, jet ski, banana boat, swimming in tropical waters, and there is even a shooting range there. Koh Larn is also suited for bicycling and hiking. www.kohlarn.com Million-Year Stone Park and Crocodile Farm: lies a 15 minute

Nong Nooch Tropical Garden: 163 Sukhumvit Road (15 minutes east of city towards Bang Saray). Beautiful gardens with waterfalls, “Cultural Extravaganza” performances four times a day. Tourists experience religious ceremonies, martial arts demonstrations, massages and elephant shows. Tel: 03842 9321.

Pattaya Dolphin World and Resort: a comparative newcomer to the scene and parts of it were yet to be completed at the beginning of 2013. Recommended for families with young children but don’t expect USA-style shows. Tel: 038 051 790/6. Pattaya Elephant Village: 7km from Central Pattaya on Phonpraphanimit Road. Shows daily at 14.30 and last an hour. A one-hour elephant ride is available from 8.00-17.30 and rafting, trekking (three hours including a meal) is available at 9.00, 10.30, 12.30 and 16.30. Tel: 038 249 818.

Sanctuary of Truth: this wooden giant can be found in North Pattaya. The entrance is at Soi 12, Naklua Road. Every inch of the building is covered with wooden carvings to reflect Ancient Vision of Earth, Ancient Knowledge, and Eastern Philosophy. It is open daily from 9.00-18.00 Admission is 500 baht. 038 225 407/038 367 229 www. sanctuaryoftruth.com Sriracha Tiger Zoo: a zoo with various shows at 341 Moo 3, Nongkham, Sri Racha (30 minutes away). It claims a population of 200 tigers and around 10,000 crocodiles, the largest of such in the world. Tel: 03829 6556. Underwater World: on Sukhumvit Road 200 metres south of Tesco Lotus at Pattaya South has a collection of marine species from the Gulf of Thailand. Walk through the 100-metre long pedestrian tunnel and witness more than 200 species of fish swimming by. Open daily from 9.00-18.00 (last tickets 17.30). Tel: 038 756 879.

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e v e n t s / p r o m o t i o n s

Not a dry eye in town...

ike it or loathe it, there’s no getting away from it. April is Songkran month when you are pretty much guaranteed at least one drenching in Pattaya. Songkran celebrates the Thai New Year. Although previously calculated according to the Thai lunar calendar, it has now been permanently fixed on the Western calendar, falling on the three days of April 13-15. However, here in Pattaya celebrations last up to a week with the big day always being April 19. If you really want to make a meal of it, head to Sattahip on April 17 for its Songkran celebrations, Naklua on April 18 and complete three days of fluid festivities in Pattaya on April 19. One of the predominant elements of Chon Buri’s Songkran celebrations is the sandcastle building competition on Bangsaen Beach on April 16-17. In Thailand, like other countries in the region at this time of year, people build sand stupas at their local temple in order to ‘make merit’. The people of Bangsaen have taken this a step further with residents taking part in a ‘chedi’ building competition, many of

the events & promotions section of pattaya living is produced in association with

them working throughout the night to achieve stunning results. Large crowds flock to Bangsaen beach to see these amazing works of sand art while other attractions are provided in the form of Muay Thai boxing and stalls offering local products and food. Thailand’s cowboys will be in the spotlight during April when they gather at the Pattaya Indoor Stadium on Soi Chaiyapruk 2 for the Pattaya Livestock Show between April 26-28. The finest American Brahman cattle that Thailand has to offer will be scrutinised and judged by Jim Williams of the V8 Ranch at Hungerford Texas, one of the world’s pre-eminent breeders of Brahman cattle. Cattle breeders will be competing for royal trophies with the show attracting leading figures from the Pattaya Livestock Department, Thai Brahman

 It will be a wet and wild occasion when Pattaya celebrates Songkran on April 19.  Creative castle building on the beach at Bangsaen is always guaranteed to draw a large crowd.

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e v e n t s / p r o m o t i o n s

 Brahman breeder Jim Williams will judge at the Pattaya Livestock Show. Breeders Association, Kamphaeng Saen Beef Breeders Association, and owners of mixed Brahman cattle, mixed European cattle, sheep and local chickens. The show will include sales of livestock merchandise and breeding products, horse racing performances, seminars promoting high standards and practices, and livestock jobs. Intriguingly, the three-day programme also includes a chicken dance contest, riding around the ‘tank’ and drift racing. Sugar Ray Leonard As this magazine went to press we discovered that the visit of boxing great Sugar Ray Leonard for a series of black tie and sport charity events, including grand gala dinners and golf tournaments in Bangkok and Pattaya has had to be postponed. The Olympic gold medallist and first boxer to win world titles at five different weights was slated to attend an Extravaganza Gala

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Dinner at Centara Grand Mirage Pattaya on April 6 and take part in a charity golf tournament at Phoenix Golf Course on April 10. These events will now be put back to later in the year and we hope to bring you more details just as soon as possible. The third Pattaya Mountain Bike Challenge will take place on Pratumnak Hill on the weekend of April 27-28. The competition will consist of separate downhill and crosscountry races in various age categories for both men and women. As in previous years, it is expected to attract many of Thailand’s top mountain bikers, although this year’s even coincides

 Thai cowboys with their Brahman cattle at the 2012 Livestock Show.

Family Pub & Restaurant

Barry Upton LIVE!!

Every Saturday 6.30-9.30pm Barry Upton’s unique Family Style Entertainment with music from the 60’s & 70’s Situated on the second floor of The Avenue Shopping Mall on Pattaya’s Second Road, The Acorn offers something for everyone. A complete range of ice cold imported and local beers, lagers and ciders. A secure and fully supervised kids soft play area with sweets and soft drinks at the Little Acorns Bar. Computer games for the teenagers too.

e v e n t s / p r o m o t i o n s

with cycling’s five-day Thailand Tour of Friendship between April 27 and May 1. Last year around 200 foreign riders took part in the Tour where the emphasis is on the love of cycling and not on professionalism or money. For more information about the Thailand Tour of Friendship visit www.tof-r1.com. For those wishing to take part, registration closes on April 22. April will see the conclusion of the 2013 Singha OK Dinghy World Championships which get under way at Pattaya’s Royal Varuna Yacht Club with two races daily from April 1-5. This is only the second time in the 50 year history of OK dinghy sailing that the world championships have been held in Asia and a record fleet is expected. While the OK dinghy sailors will take centre stage, there’s plenty to keep the catamarans and keel boats aficionados occupied in April. The cats and junior sailors of the Royal Varuna Yacht Club will join the dinghies for the British Weekend on April 20-21 while the larger keel boats will compete in

 Silverlake Vineyard is to host the second Overlove Music Festival.  Scores of international OK dinghy sailors will be in Pattaya in search of a world title.  Boxing Legend Sugar Ray Leonard had been due to make his first trip to Thailand for a series of charity black tie dinners and golf tournaments.  Mountain bikers will compete on Pratumnak Hill in the third Pattaya MTB Challenge.

the events & promotions section of pattaya living is produced in association with

their fourth regatta of the year over the weekend of April 13-14. Silverlake Vineyard is rapidly becoming the natural home of Thai rock festivals and the latest is scheduled for Saturday, May 4 starting at 4pm. Big audience The Overlove Music Festival 2013 has been inspired by the success of last year’s Overlove event which attracted an audience of more than 10,000. This year’s edition will feature artists such as Pete P, Corrs, Watchara, Phrases, Lyrics, Two Popetorn, BP Pat, ETC, Ben, Q (Flure), Girl, Tattoo Colour, Scrubb, Blackhead, Mild, Superbaker and Poly cat. Tickets for the event cost Bt1,300 and are available from www.thaiticketmajor.com.

The world’s leading golf tour operators will be in Pattaya for the second Asia Golf Tourism Convention at the Royal Cliff Hotel from April 29 to May 2. Last year’s inaugural event in Kuala Lumpur attracted 426 delegates from 46 countries and even more are expected to descend on Pattaya. The choice of Pattaya as the convention location follows the city being named Golf Destination of the Year 2012 for Asia and Australasia and is expected to give a major boost to golf tourism in the area. Cricket is attracting a growing following in Thailand with Pattaya at the forefront of the game’s development. Pattaya Cricket Club, which plays its home games at the Thai Polo Club, Horseshoe Point, faces a busy April programme interspersed with various tournaments for six and sevenplayer formats of the game. Pattaya host the British Club, Bangkok, in a 25 overs friendly at Horseshoe Point on April 7, starting at 11.30am, then follow it up with another 25 overs friendly

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 Pattaya United will be seeking to climb the league table in April. on April 14 against Bangkok Cricket Club, starting at 11am. Pattaya’s second XI will be in league action against Champions Cricket Club at Horseshoe Point on April 28. The league format is also 25 overs a side and the game will get under way at 9am. Cricket tournaments April is also the cricket tournament season with the Chiang Mai International Cricket Sixes starting the ball rolling between March 31 and April 6 at the Chiang Mai Gymkhana Club. It’s then on to Phuket for the Kata Group International Cricket Sevens at Kata Beach over three days starting on April 9. And finally, if Thailand’s cricketers have any stamina left, they will hang around for the Phuket International Cricket Sixes at the Kata Group Sports Ground which takes place between April 17-21. Pattaya Cricket Club trains each Saturday at Horseshoe Point from 10.30am. Those wishing to join should email nets@ pattayacricketclub.com for more information.

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The Dolphins of Pattaya United have the opportunity to make progress up the Thai Premier League with two home league games scheduled within the space of four days at the 5,000 capacity Nongprue Stadium. Following an away trip to local rivals Chon Buri on April 6 (kick-off 6.30pm), Pattaya host Ratchaburi at Nongprue Stadium in a midweek fixture on April 17 (kick-off 7pm). Three days later they are back at Nongprue to face early league pacesetters Muang Thong United in a 6pm kick-off on April 20. Pattaya end the month with an away trip to Bangkok United on April 27, kick-off 6pm. Any changes to the schedule will be posted on the Dolphins’ website, www.pattayautd.com Robert Collins

Details of published events are correct at the time of going to press but are subject to change without notice. Readers are advised to check with event organisers.

DEFEN

NAL IO

INTERNAT CE

IT Y S E R V

R OT

A &S

T DUC ON EC

A PR OM ISE

E C TI O N

s e c u r i t y

i n s i g h t

Good security pays off

or me security is akin to a hospital. I’d prefer not to need it, but I’m glad to know it’s there, writes Dave Buckley. In an ideal world (that place where no one lives) there would be no need for security firms. But we live in the real world and demand for proper protection is as prevalent as it has ever been. Indeed, maybe it’s at its peak right now in an environment where illegal addictions plus no let up in poverty levels increase the need to gain (make that steal) quick money. Take a look at many of the advertisements and items of promotional material for the new residential projects going up in the city. How many of them refer to the security capabilities of their developments? Closed Circuit Security Cameras (CCTV) abound and round-the-clock security coverage is becoming the rule, not the exception. Rapid expansion It was against this backdrop that 43-year-old UK-born Joe Cox set up the Defence International Security Services company (DISS) in Pattaya four years ago and already it has expanded rapidly, becoming the country’s largest independent provider of security!

Joe is a no-nonsense guy who seems ideally suited for this line of work. “I tell people what I think and give it to them straight. I believe that when it comes to security they prefer things that way,” he said. Joe’s been involved in policing in one form or another for most of his adult life – first as a military policeman, then he spent five years with the Met (London’s Metropolitan Police) and more recently with his own UK security company. As such, he’s brought years of experience of how villains work and methods of combatting them to his Thai operation. Joe was encouraged to come to Thailand 14 years ago by his good friend Tom Coglan who runs CSP, the building and development company based in Soi Chaiyapruk II. Tom, also an ex-policeman, met Joe through their security interests in the UK. Joe and I were speaking at Coco’s restaurant when, by coincidence, Tom and his wife came in. “I moved here six years ago,” Joe had told me, ”and decided to set up Defence International in 2009. Initially it was solely a security dog operation. We would go to places where there had been a security breach, solve the problem and move on. “But more and more I was getting asked if we could stay and

‘‘  Checking a delivery to Laem Chabang.

Some simply won’t turn up at the

classroom to begin their training; others will be filtered out in the classroom – either their choice or mine.

take over the security at sites on a full-time basis so we tendered for a few projects, won them and now we provide a full service.” The company specialises in looking after condos, housing estates, factories and hotels. They even have responsibility for the Dutch and British Embassies in Bangkok which Joe takes special pride in. “Our smallest job is taking care of the Ocean’s Edge condominium project at Krating Bay where we have three people,”said Joe. Networking opportunity ”Our biggest involves 30 staff at Laem Chabang port where we protect the interests of Kevin Fisher’s CES company. We also do a lot of work for developers Rony (Fineman) of Nova Group and Kobi (Elbaz) of Tulip Group. I made contact with them at a Movers & Shakers evening,” he said with a laugh knowing that I’m an avid “networker” and was at the same event. Defence International has 130 employees on the books and a total of 15 trained dogs. “We’re looking to bring in more dogs,” said Joe. But bringing in more security guards is not a simple and straightforward operation. News that will not come as a surprise to anyone in business here in Pattaya.

“If I need to take on another 20 security guards I will start with 50,” said Joe. “Some simply won’t turn up at the classroom to begin their training; others will be filtered out in the classroom – either their choice or mine.” Several of those who get through the training process and are put to work will quit after a matter of days or last until the first pay day before disappearing. So finding good, conscientious staff is not easy in the security industry but Joe is not one to let his standards drop. “It’s been known for me to attend a networking evening and go on my rounds afterwards to check that my staff are still alert, that their log books are being properly kept and that they are still in uniform.” Joe is very aware that his staff are representing him and the company’s image. Labour laws “Our disciplinary policy is in line with Thai labour laws but we mix in some British principles, too,” says Joe. “In most respects it’s a case of three ‘strikes’ (breaches of discipline) and you’re out.” But there are no second chances where drink or drugs are involved. “We have a logo on the uniform

 Joe with one of his canine “employees” at a British Embassy function.  Guards at the Amari hotel get their briefing.

‘‘ My phone is rarely

switched off. If a client wants to

talk to me I always try to make myself available.

that everyone recognises now so we can’t afford to have our image tarnished by such indiscretions,” Joe added. “We have a reputation to protect and, as everyone knows, you are only as good as your last job.” Helping Joe maintain the high standards is his wife Juterat (Aoy). ”She very supportive and provides invaluable help when it comes to dealing with our Thai staff,” said Joe. “In fact, I think she’s tougher than I am with them!” Joe acknowledges his operation is not perfect but he makes every effort to ensure it is the best it can be. “We apply English-type security to everything we do and I think that’s a large part of the reason why we have been successful,” said Joe. “Some firms involved in security just put people in uniforms, but those people have little or no idea of what is required of them. When they work for Defence International they are aware. “Take the example of guards on the gate of housing projects. Some are too scared to ask visitors where they are going or who they are seeing. It’s easier just to open the gate and shut it again. “We tell our people not to let anybody in until they have established to their satisfaction why the visitor wishes to enter.

Where we have the client’s backing we ask for ID cards or driving licences to be left with us. Also we get our guards to log the colour and make of the car and how many people are riding in it.” Another embassy? So what does the future hold for Defence International? Well soon they may be going even more international because they are actively looking at projects in both Myanmar and the Philippines. They might even take care of another British embassy in a neighbouring ASEAN country but that’s yet to be confirmed. While expansion is good for any company Joe is such a “handson” person that contracts outside Thailand mean he would need to travel more to ensure his clients are satisfied which is a consideration as he values his time at home. “That said, my phone is rarely switched off. If a client wants to talk to me I always try to make myself available. I want them to feel safe, you could say secure, in the knowledge that I’m on call and on the case,” he concluded. l Joe’s company doesn’t confine itself to supplying security canines and personnel. They also sell many security devices. More on this in a future issue.

tell how ’t n a c u o y a bag e t a e k li is water A woman t o h in r e h u put o y 945 il t n u is en 1933 and 1 e e tw h e s b s g te n ta o S str f the United lt, First Lady o P A T T A Y A

G R A F f I T I

eve

- Eleanor Roos

I’ll take your part When darkness comes And pain is all around Like a bridge over; troubled water I will lay me down

We have a water purifier, so we drink a lot of it. As a singer, especially in Utah, you have to hydrate constantly -D onny Osmond

- Bridge over Troubled Water : Simon and Garfunkel

There are only three things women need in life: Food, wate r, and complimen ts

under the bath That was me n. being held dow and the water anted it to look The director w sible so he told - Chris Rock as real as pos go t of me, don't Keanu, in fron scary. her. So it was on y s a e When you take a shower in space, - Rachel Weisz you have to press the water onto your body to clean yourself, and then you gotta vacuum it off.

PATTAYA LIVING• 01/2013 • Issue 25

- Ace Frehley, former lead guitarist of Kiss

I came to water late. I learned to swim at the age of 20. - Liam Neeson

A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unneces sary freezing of wa ter - Carl Reiner

, I ve always been scared of the water, , and yet it seems I m forced to go into it on every movie that I make. - Natalie Wood, who died in a drowning incident

ect All water has a perf ver memory and is fore trying to get back to where it was.

Spirit on the w ater Darkness on th e face of the deep I k eep thinkin' about yo u, baby And I can't hard ly sleep

n, American - Toni Morriso and professor r, o it d e t, s li ve no

- Spirit on the Wat

er : Bob Dylan

Mayor Vaughn: I’m only trying to say that Amity is a summer town. We need summer dollars. Now, if the people can’t swim here, they’ll be glad to swim at the beaches of Cape Cod, the Hamptons, Long Island... police chief Brody: That doesn’t mean we have to serve them up as smorgasbord! - From Jaws : Roy Scheider (Brody) and Murray Hamilton

I have been instrumental in banning bottled water on the set. It hasn’t gone that well with the crew... so I replaced it with tequila understand Man will never versa. woman and vice water. An We are oil and never be equal level can one will maintained, as here the always excel w and that other doesn't,

ent. breeds resentm -Dionne Warwick

I never

- Hugh Laurie

drink water

because of the disgusting

things that

fish do in it. - w c Fields

Songkran special: From an idea by Bart Walters

h e a l t h y

l i v i n g

Dr Iain Corness (right) is a medical doctor who has worked in the UK, Europe and Australia, before coming to Thailand in 1997 to become a consultant at the Bangkok Hospital Pattaya (email: inquiry@bph.co.th). He has been writing for newspapers and magazines since 1967 and is currently a special correspondent for the Pattaya Mail, technical editor for Asean Autobiz, and contributor to many coffee table magazines in Thailand.

Small digits, big pain

ave you ever broken a toe? Any toe? If you have, you will have no trouble remembering it as broken toes are damn painful. In fact, the pain is much greater than many other fractures, such as a nose, or even a wrist, despite the ridiculously small digits like toes. Having been born inherently clumsy, I have fractured several toes, with most occurring by walking into table legs or other immovable pieces of furniture. I also sacrificed my big toe by managing to drop a large concrete brick on it. While wearing no shoes. Inherently clumsy. Bunch of digits One Christmas day I caught the corner of the bed in the afternoon. After the initial mutterings and hopping one-legged around the bedroom going “Ow! Ow!” I expected the buzzing throb to quietly go away. It didn’t, but what did come was the slow appreciation that I had done a little more than just a stubbed toe. The toe began to swell and

‘‘ For the

smaller toes,

taping to the next

toe up is all that is

’’ necessary

took on a beautiful purple hue, which is almost 100 per cent indicative of a fracture. X-Rays really only confirm the clinical diagnosis. Now I was actually quite lucky. If you must have a fractured toe as a pastime, do not pick the big toe for this. It really is the only important toe, as it is the one that keeps your balance. No joke. When you are standing, there are all sorts of little receptors in your head that tell your brain whether you are stable, or in danger of falling forwards or backwards. These receptors then relay messages to your big toe, to increase or decrease pressure to keep you upright – and you thought the only reason for your big toe was to move family pets out of the way! I was lucky in the fact that my Christmas fracture was of the middle toe. After the importance given to the big toe, all the others are only there to fill up the space in your shoes. And no, I’m not joking. Just have a look at your other toes. What a twisted, mis-shapen bunch of digits they all are. What earthly other use is there for them? About as useful as a box of

matches in a typhoon. So what is the treatment for fractured toes? Let me assure you from nerve tingling personal experience, that the first is pain relief. (As an aside, I have always said that the ideal doctor to consult, is one who has had the ailment you are suffering from. I am now a specialist in fractured toes.) Bunch of digits Pain relief! Some paracetamol with a good lump of codeine in it works well for the first 24 hours, and after that, simple paracetamol is really all that is necessary for the smaller toes, but the big toe might need the extra oomph of codeine for a few more days. Again there is a difference between big and little toes as far as further treatment is concerned. The big toe often needs some kind of immobilisation, and splinting or even plaster may be required. For the smaller toes, taping to the next toe up is all that is necessary, or if it is the very tip of the toes that is fractured (that’s the bit we medicos call the ‘Terminal Expansion’), just masterfully ignore the toe.

Heroes and heroic failures

1. Charles Lindbergh (above left) achieved world fame in 1927 with the first non-stop transAtlantic flight. He flew from New York, to where? 2. Amelia Earhart disappeared in 1937 while attempting to circumnavigate the globe in a Lockheed Model 10 Electra aircraft. For what achievement was she awarded the US Distinguished Flying Cross? 3. Which famous sailor was the commander of The Golden Hind (replica pictured above right)? 4. Sir Edmund Hillary and Sherpa Tenzing Norgay are credited with the first successful assent of Everest in 1963. But who were the two Britons who possibly reached the summit in 1924 and died in the attempt? 5. Whose ship, the Endurance, (bottom right) was crushed in pack ice during an Antarctic expedition in 1915 leading to an epic journey of survival? 6. Captain Robert Scott and his four companions (above centre) perished after reaching the South Pole only to discover someone had beaten them to it by 34 days. Who beat them to the Pole and which country was he from?

Next month marks the 60th anniversary of the conquering of Everest. But many explorers achieved lasting fame as much for failure as they did for success. Answers overleaf.

7. Which English navigator in the Endeavour carried the Royal Society expedition to Tahiti to observe the transit of Venus across the sun in the late 1760s? 8. Which Scottish missionary and explorer travelled widely in Africa and was the first European to discover Victoria Falls? 9. Who led the Commonwealth expedition which completed the first overland crossing of Antarctica in 1958?

14. Russian soldiers have been marching to chants of which popular TV cartoon? 15. Who has vowed to keep listening to The Smiths despite Johnny Marr ‘banning’ him from being a fan? 16. 150 garden gnomes are to line up for inspection by The Queen at which event next month? 17. Thanks to hacking, a Montana TV station warned viewers of an attack from what?

10. Which explorer led the first expedition that successfully circumnavigated the globe?

18. Which group of people have been upset by Beyonce’s new trainers?

Now to test your news knowledge:

19. Why did Nottinghamshire police get upset over a 999 call from an 18-year-old Manchester United fan?

11. Daniel Day-Lewis (below left) became the first man to win three lead acting Oscars, but he needs one more to equal the record of which actress? 12. An Iranian news agency digitally altered the photograph of which Oscar presenter before publishing it in Iran? 13. Which footballer, who until recently, played in England, has commissioned a statue of himself, instructing the sculptor to emphasise his defiance and highlight his muscles?

q u i z

a n s w e r s

1. Lindbergh touched down at Le Bourget Field, Paris, on May 21, 1927. 2. Earhart received the award after becoming the first woman to fly the Atlantic solo in 1932. 3. Sir Francis Drake (1540-1596). 4. George Mallory and Andrew ‘Sandy’ Irvine disappeared while attempting to scale Everest in 1924. But the 1999 discovery of Mallory’s body close to the summit heightened speculation that they had actually succeeded. 5. Ernest Shackleton (1874-1922). 6. An expedition led by Norwegian explorer Roald Amundsen (18721928) was the first to reach the South Pole on December 14, 1911. 7. Captain James Cook (1728-1779). 8. David Livingstone (1813-1873).

 Mario Balotelli – defiant and muscular is what he wants his statue to portray.

9. Vivian Fuchs, accompanied by Everest climber Edmund Hillary, led a team which crossed Antarctica using Sno-Cats from Weddell Sea to Ross Sea via the South Pole between November 24, 1957 and March 2, 1958.

 A Sno-Cat of Vivian Fuch’s 195758 expedition treks across Antarctica.

10. Ferdinand Magellan of Portugal (c1480-1521).

 Katharine Hepburn – she has most Best Actress Oscar wins with four.  Michelle Obama announced the Best Movie award at this year’s Oscars with Jack Nicholson. Her picture was later altered by an Iranian news agency to hide her bare shoulders and neck.  SpongeBob SquarePants has proved a hit with squarebashing Russian soldiers.

11. Katharine Hepburn got four Best Actress Oscars for Morning Glory (1933); Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner (1967); The Lion In Winter (1968) and On Golden Pond (1981). 12. Michelle Obama. Her picture was digitally altered to cover up her bare shoulders and neck. 13. Mario Balotelli who joined AC Milan from Manchester City. 14. Several army units feature in a popular YouTube video of Russian soldiers marching and chanting to SpongeBob SquarePants.

15. British Prime Minister David Cameron, who selected The Smiths’ This Charming Man as one of his Desert Island Discs. 16. The Chelsea Flower Show. Garden gnomes are going to be exhibited for the first time at this year’s show. 17. Zombies. Pranksters hacked into KRTV’s emergency announcement system and warned that the “bodies of the dead are rising from their graves”. 18. Animal rights activists. Beyonce’s new trainers reportedly contain anaconda, stingray, crocodile, ostrich and calf’s fur. Husband Jay-Z has shoes containing python. 19. He phoned to report that Nani’s red card in Manchester United’s 2-1 home defeat to Real Madrid in the Champions League was criminal. The fan has since apologised to police.

w i n i n g

d i n i n g

the chow hound Pattaya cocktail awards - 2013 This may come as a shock to regular readers of The Chowhound, but The Hound has been known to have a drink or two. This month we are going to announce the First Annual Chowhound Cocktail Awards, Pattaya Edition. Why give them out so early in the year? If we wait until later, we probably won’t remember. Here are our first five categories:

Best Bloody Mary: Tigglebitties The Hound’s favourite hangover cure is a properly constructed Bloody Mary. At Tigglebitties bar/restaurant/hotel in South Pattaya, they have the magic formula. Everything is hand-built by well trained technicians. Every ingredient is measured and added in the proper sequence. And most importantly … they do it quietly.

Best Margarita: Mike’s Mexican Cantina

Hands down The Hound chooses Mike’s Mexican Cantina just off Thappraya Road. The Hound loves to pop in on a lazy Sunday afternoon, suck down some Golden Margaritas and plow through a plate of sizzling fajitas. Mike’s secret is they make their own mix and hand-shake every one of these tequila and lime delights. They put Mrs Hound in a frisky mood every time.

Best Cold Draught Beer: Punch and Judy Pub The Hound is not a big beer drinker, but when he wants one … he wants it cold, he wants it poured properly, he wants it to be his favourite brand, and he wants it with a smile. That’s how they do it at Punch and Judy Pub on Thepprasit Soi 8. On sweltering summer afternoons, The Hound has been known to pop into the air conditioned darkness for a cold Stella Artois.

Best Wine-by-the-Glass: The Blue Olive The Hound considers a restaurant’s house-wine list to be a window into its soul. Chef Raymond from The Blue Olive Mediterranean Restaurant prides himself on the WBG menu. The Hound regularly commiserates with Chef Ray and has quaffed carafes of all five of his house wines, none of which come out of a box.

Best Fruity Girl Drink: Hard Rock Hotel The Hound will admit it; from time to time he’s been known to go on a girl-drink binge. There are days when The Hound just can’t resist the allure of a Mango Daiquiri at The Hard Rock Hotel on Pattaya Beach Road. Bikini-clad tourists, rock-n-roll music, hip hotel lounge … quick, The Hound needs a Daiquiri … make it a double!

P A T T A Y A

N I G H T L I F E

the nite owl Swooping on the best venues Dinner and drama combine for a fun-filled evening out

hen I discovered that Pattaya had a community theatre group, it was nearly as shocking as finding out we had polo matches. It was Saturday night, my wing-woman was out of town and I was staring at the ridiculous cornucopia of entertainment choices available here in Fun City. When I saw the playbill for a “Night of One Acts” presented by The Pattaya Players Community Theatre group at Indian By Nature (IBN) restaurant, skepticism and curiosity got the best of me. As a long-standing fan of IBN, I figured at least I’d get a good meal. The surprises continued as I arrived to find a packed restaurant transformed into a dinner theatre complete with lights, sound and a cozy little stage. IBN has a kind of theatrical look to it anyway, and I could not imagine a better place to host such an event. As the staff scurried around fetching drinks and setting up the sumptuous buffet, I took the opportunity to peruse the crowd.

Talk about an eclectic group … this was a show unto itself! Young, old … foreigners, Thais … singles, couples … as my dear old mother would say, “18 to 80, blind crippled and crazy”. Around 7pm, the master of ceremonies announced “dinner is served” and the crowd proceeded in an orderly fashion to fill their plates at the buffet. Traffic flow The folks at IBN strategically placed the food in one corner of the restaurant near the kitchen which helped traffic flow. In another smart move, they didn’t attempt to represent their entire extensive menu, but chose a well matched selection of dishes. This kept the crowd moving and the food fresh and hot. (I’ll leave the food review to my Pattaya Living compatriot, The Chowhound. Look for it in an upcoming issue). The first play began around 8pm called “A Jolly Sinister Jape”; a classic old throwback English farce complete with nutty characters and a silly plot.

‘‘ In the past

we have done a few other

‘Evenings of

One Acts’ and

found success due to the

uniqueness of three different shows in one. People like fast-moving plays – so just as one finishes something

’’ totally different comes along.

Chris Parsons, the group leader of Pattaya Players, played Biffy, a stuffed shirt with a young floozy wife named Ophelia. Chris Harman played Lord Stubbs, a bumbling pretender with one eye on his drink and the other on the young lady. The plot set up pretty well, and just about the time it was slowing down … enter Fatty, played by Jade Taylor, an old acquaintance of Ophelia and a real spitfire. Chris Harman carried most of this act with his expressive face and well-timed tawdry comments. Paula Livingston was the young lady who played Ophelia and I was shocked to discover she is a student at St Vincent’s International School in Green Valley. Her kooky accent and jaded aristocratic comportment pulled the part off like a much older actress. Her St Vincent’s classmate, young Jade Taylor, brought great energy to the stage and moved the story along quickly. As with many English farces, the whole thing ended up in a frenetic struggle with lots of noise and a gun. When the first act was over, the MC announced the buffet was restocked and the next act would begin in 10 minutes. Patrons queued up for fresh food refills and were soon back in their seats for Act II. The second play was a one man show titled “Prince Charming’s Complaint” featuring Doug Heron. The premise of the story is the Prince’s side of things regarding several popular fairy tales; Rapunzel, Snow White and Cinderella. In dramatic terms, I

suppose this is called a “soliloquy”. In this case it was one long hilarious rant. The Prince’s pace, timing and tone were perfect. The audience hung on every word. I couldn’t help thinking, “I’d love to deliver that speech”; but I doubt I’d do it nearly as well as Mr Heron. Once the second act was finished, the lights came up and revealed the buffet was now clustered with several dessert selections and the audience lined up one more time.“Nice touch” I whispered to IBN’s owner. The final play for the evening was “Oprah Made Me Do It!” a modern satire set in a bookstore in which an underpaid store clerk named Greg (played by Tom Fletcher) encounters an absolutely psychotic customer named Patsy. Crazy lady in red Michelle Taylor playing this crazy woman in red was the highlight of the evening. Her belligerence and dogged determination to get her way had the whole audience feeling sympathy for the poor beleaguered clerk. Later in the scene enters Monica (Hannah Carrodus); a perky young lady who just wants to pick up the book she ordered. Of course the conflict escalates and in the end we all cheered when the downtrodden clerk boils over. Once the lights were up and the patrons filing out, I had a chance to corner chief thespian Chris Parsons and ask him a few questions about the group. I asked Chris why they had

chosen a night of one act plays for this performance. He said: “In the past, we have done a few other ‘Evenings of One Acts’ and found success due to the uniqueness of three different shows in one. People like fast-moving plays – so just as one finishes, something totally different comes along!” Chris went on to say: “Though our Pattaya audience seems to mainly enjoy comical productions, we always try to find different modes of delivering laughter.” I had to agree with Chris on both counts. It is hard to imagine this audience sitting through a serious or overly dramatic production. Most people want to laugh and have fun. Most of all, we Pattayans have a low tolerance for boredom. Keep it moving … keep it light … make me laugh; and this production on Saturday night did all of those things. Overall, I would characterise my experience with the Pattaya Players as “very pleasantly surprised”. Three things had me smiling with unexpected pleasure. First was the reaction of the Thai people in attendance. As I scanned tables to find Thai wives, girlfriends, boyfriends and acquaintances, I noticed that every single one of them was riveted to the stage. Oh sure, the foreign patrons were enjoying the show, but the Thais were absolutely mesmerised by a live performance. One Thai lady I spoke to said: “I cannot believe they have the confidence to do this.” Something else I did not expect

‘‘ ’’ The quality

of food and

ambiance (at

IBN) is exactly in line with our ethos–

professional, modern and friendly.

was how completely involved the restaurant was. The IBN staff were the epitome of “hands-on hosts”. This wasn’t just a play happening in the middle of a dining room, it was a dinner show. Food came out hot and timely. Drinks were delivered quickly. And somehow they did it all without blocking anyone’s view. Founding sponsor Chris said: “Indian By Nature is one of our founding sponsors (and biggest fans!) therefore we aim to hold at least one production a year there. In addition, the quality of food and ambiance is exactly in line with our ethos – professional, modern and friendly.” I couldn’t agree more. Easily the most unexpected treat was the attitude of the Pattaya Players themselves. Driving to the show, I prepared myself for all the pretense and self-importance one usually associates with the phrase “community theatre”. I expected a handful of wannabe actors trying to be big fish in a small pond. What I found was a bunch of friendly folks just happy to have a place to perform and none of them taking any of it too seriously. They just went out there and had fun. In turn the audience had fun … hell, I had fun! The next production is 14 and 15 June, a full-length affair titled “Divorce Sale”.Wanna have some fun? See you there. Nite Owl out

i n s i d e r

r e p o r t

Is your home a boy or a girl? The month Bart Walters gives his take on gender-ised interior design

Sea captains refer to their ships as “she”, but I wonder what they call their houses? Without a doubt, home décor will always reflect which set of chromosomes is making the household decisions. Some places swing wildly from side to side; others walk the middle path. Take a good look at your house. Is it a boy or a girl? To understand what I mean, watch a couple shopping for a new house. Aren’t their priorities different? Which features are their hot buttons? It’s important to know because it affects the home-buying decision as well as the décor. Men love leather A dead giveaway of male gender is leather furniture. Men love leather … preferably distressed leather. Show a man 3 or more metres of leather sofa and you’ve got his attention. I personally own more than one leather sofa roughly the size of aircraft carriers. For a man, the big leather sofa “anchors” the house. Oversize leather chairs are also man furniture-candy. And

a big leather lazy-boy recliner … kryptonite! Persian or oriental rugs are also a man thing. Have you ever seen such a rug look effeminate? Even in pastel colors, the pattern and design is usually regimented and uniform … male. Most oriental rugs are in bold masculine colours like red. Not surprisingly, they look good with leather furniture. Many times you’ll see said leather furniture in a “man-cave”. That’s the modern vernacular for a “big boy tree-house”. My grandpa used to call it his “den”. Bookshelves … big TVs … pool tables … video game consoles … these are the telltale signs of a “man-cave”. If a home has a bar, it is a boy. Said bar will normally be located in the “man-cave”. Wine cellars are by definition man-caves. For many bachelors living here in Pattaya, their entire domicile is a man-cave. A spillover from the man-cave is the “media room”. That’s what we now call the place where the audio-visual penis-extenders are located. Watch a couple walk into a house and see where they go

‘‘ If a house has a walk-in closet, it is a girl. This trait is part practicality and part extravagance. Women worry about storage and they notice when there isn’t enough.

first. Invariably, a man will walk to the spot designated as living area and figure out where the TV will go. Most men want to visualise themselves enjoying sports or action movies on a gigantic flat screen with movie stars running away from explosions … possibly while reclining on their big leather couch. Unlike the man-cave, the media room is a place all visitors will see. The electronic equipment needs to be displayed properly and given its due respect. If a house has a built-in entertainment centre, it is a boy. Tastes change from wood-tone media storage facilities to slick high-gloss minitheatres, but make no mistake the entertainment centre is man’s domain. Houses with no TV are either girls or eunuchs. One household I recently visited boasted the ultimate male media extravaganza … two big flat screens in one living room. The head of the household rationalised this approach by saying he and his sons needed two screens. I actually witnessed him

i n s i d e r

watching his favourite rugby team while the boys were playing video games; male bonding at its best … no girls aloud in that room. Female traits in a house usually revolve around practicality; rooms that “work” for the family like the kitchen or bathrooms. Just like men claim the living room as their realm, women will always take it upon themselves to evaluate and dominate the kitchen. It doesn’t matter if they can cook or not … it is wired into their DNA. Most women visualise themselves preparing food in the kitchen, or entertaining in a dining room. Mostly they seem concerned about the size of the kitchen and eating area relative to the size of the house. Is the kitchen too small? Is it too big? Again, it’s the functionality gene. Similarly, women will always scrutinise bathrooms more than a man. Show 10 couples the same house and ask the man later if it has a bathtub; I’d estimate that only two will remember. Show a woman a master

bathroom that has two sinks and she starts smiling. Combine it with separate showers and vanity areas and she starts mentally placing her beauty products. Women will tolerate a man in their bathroom, but they prefer separate facilities. Walk into an en-suite bathroom of a master bedroom and you’ll immediately know who is running the show. If a house has a walk-in closet, it is a girl. This trait is part practicality and part extravagance. Women worry about storage and they notice when there isn’t enough. Again visualisation plays a role. When a woman sees a standalone wardrobe they instinctively know it won’t hold all their clothes. When they see a big walk-in wardrobe, they envision filling it with more stuff. For the ladies, a “wardrobe dream” is where they can see all of their clothes at once. But, if you want your house to sell to a woman, I’ve got two words for you … “shoe cabinet”. A wellmade high-volume shoe cabinet is to a woman what the lazy-boy lounger is to a man.

r e p o r t

Some features of a home can send mixed signals; take a Jacuzzi for instance. Men like Jacuzzis because they evoke playboy-esque images. One can only imagine the visualisation that goes on in their mind. For men, it’s all about the size of the Jacuzzi, the power of the jets, and the lighting. For men a Jacuzzi is equivalent to a sexy power boat. Women also love this feature as a personal extravagance. They envision themselves sipping on a cold glass of Chardonnay, bubbling away with some exotic bath salts and listening to Sade. For women, the Jacuzzi is all about intimacy and view. Both sexes are attracted to this feature for different reasons, so it is hard to draw any conclusions about a house’s gender when you see a Jacuzzi. What gender is your bed? One household feature that will most certainly have a gender is the bed. If you see a leather headboard, it’s a boy. The same goes for waterbeds, beds with ball and claw feet and big four poster

wooden beds. Brass beds are girls; as are any beds with canopies or materials draped above it like mosquito netting, silk and the like. A big masculine wooden bed with a canopy is still a girl. Beds that are high off the ground are preferred by women while men prefer to be closer to the floor. Murphy beds are boys … daybeds are girls. Visitors to my home are often confused about its gender. I’ve got tons of leather furniture, an oriental rug, a ridiculous audiovisual system and a sea view Jacuzzi. On the other hand I’ve got a giant American kitchen, hisand-her showers, two walk-in wardrobes and a big shoe cabinet. Many first time guests in my home ask who the designer is. When they find out I did it myself, they either don’t believe me or think I’m gay. For me, this illustrates just how strongly we identify household style with gender. I don’t let it bother me. Here in Thailand we are used to not being so sure about gender, are we not? Bart Walters

Coffee break

Did you know...

John ‘Babbacombe’ Lee was the ‘man they couldn’t hang’. Convicted on flimsy evidence of the murder of his employer, Emma Keyse, in 1884, he went to the gallows at Exeter three times on February 23, 1885, but on each occasion the trapdoor failed to open, despite being tested and found to be in perfect working order. The Home Secretary later commuted his sentence to life imprisonment. Lee was released in 1907 and died aged 80 in 1945.

R N R N N R N _______ ____ ________ __ ____ ________ N N N R _____ __ ______ ____ _________ __ ______ SUDOKU CRYPTOGRAM 3

25 20

14 10

18 17 13

11 18 13 18 17 11

24 26

26 25 21 5

18 17

12 20

11 17 24 20

Decode this Ogden Nash quote by deciphering the missing letters. We’ve given you two to start.

Answers to all the puzzles appear overleaf

Six of the best

Qatar – best airline?

NUMBER CRUNCHER Fill in the missing numbers using 1-9 to complete the equation. Each number is used once. Multiplication and division are peformed

before

addition and subtraction.

+ +

× ×

-6

2 -

+ -27

67 -7

Two-minute trivia

1. Which Scottish football club did George Best play for? 2. Which popular confectionery product went on sale in Malta for the first time in February? 3. Which English football club plays its home games at Highbury (don’t jump in!)? 4. Which Roman emperor was the first to convert to Christianity? 5. Which is the only Great Lake wholly within the USA?

The best airlines of 2012 according to the World Airline Awards. Agree or disagree? 1. Qatar Airways (Doha) 2. Asiana Airlines (Seoul, South Korea) 3. Singapore Airlines 4. Cathay Pacific Airways (Hong Kong) 5. All Nippon Airways (Tokyo, Japan) 6. Etihad Airways (Abu Dhabi, UAE)

3 7

3 4 5 1 9 2 6 5 7 8 7 9 6 9 8 1 3 6 8 1 5 2 6 2 4 3

W O D A H S N I A T N U O M I E O P U R P I O K Z X I X C R D T E L M Z M A I C I J X M U I G T H E L Q F M I N O U X B S Z R U K A A Q X C E Q Z S N E C E E A O S E D Q O F G U O K A A V E M A A M A H U B P H A P S M L N J H N C P Z N V C L N U T C B V U K T H C G T Y L H R P E N O A T D V A G O R A P E I Q R W M L R C A B C U Y A H I K W N E B L E X L A T O C I Z S W W S K Z E S S L N R V L A D D Z V T G L Y G N E G U L U J E Z B R A Y V K G C Y N Y A B L A T S Y R C K S H V K F W E F O U X A G I L Y D X Find the names of these 12 local golf courses:

6. Edmund Burke coined the expression ‘the Fourth Estate in 1787. What is the Fourth Estate?

Century Chonburi Crystal Bay Eastern Star Green Valley

7. What was the first product to be scanned by the current barcode system in 1974?

Pleasant Valley Royal Lakeside Siam Country Club Treasure Hill

Khao Kheow Laem Chabang Mountain Shadow Phoenix

Coffee break answers two-minute trivia

1 Hibernian; 2 Maltesers; 3 Fleetwood Town; 4 Constantine (306-337AD); 5 Lake Michigan; 6 The news media; 7 Wrigley’s chewing gum NUMBER CRUNCHER AND SUDOKU 2

+ 1

-6

7 -27

× ×

4 -7

3 9 8 4 5 6 7 1 2

7 6 5 1 8 2 3 9 4

4 2 1 3 7 9 5 8 6

5 3 7 9 2 8 6 4 1

6 4 9 5 3 1 2 7 8

8 1 2 6 4 7 9 5 3

1 7 3 8 6 5 4 2 9

9 5 6 2 1 4 8 3 7

2 8 4 7 9 3 1 6 5

Multiply and divide before adding or subtracting. The second row down is therefore 5 x 7 = 35, 8 - 35 = -27.

‘Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.’ – Ogden Nash

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repeat from last issue

b a r s / r e s t a u r a n t s

Bars

Bamboo Bar: live music nightly in this busy bar and streetside lounge. Close to Walking Street entrance. Tel: 038 232 315, Fax: 038 232 315, email: bamboopattaya@ hotmail.com Caddy Shack: as the name suggests, it’s a haven for golfers. Airconditioned with outdoor terrace and swimming pool and rooms to rent upstairs. 388/385 M10, Soi 17. Tel: 038 300 683, Fax: 038 300 682, email: enquiries@caddyshackpattaya.com Green Bottle: cosy, well-run pub with a good reputation and central location. 216/3 M10, 2nd Road. Tel: 038 429 870, email: dianagrp@ loxinfo.co.th Jameson’s: Irish pub with strong food offering. Popular with locals and tourists alike. Good place to unwind. 80/164 Moo 9, Soi Sukrudee (Soi AR) right next to Nova Park. Tel: 038 361 873-4 Fax: 038 361 873, email: info@jamesonspattaya.com

Need to be fed and watered? You’ll find a warm welcome at any of the following ...

Restaurants

Ali Baba: Good quality Indian restaurant with a fine selection of authentic dishes. 1/13-14, Pattaya Central Road close to the beach. Tel: 038 361 620 Alt Heidelberg: German sausages and imported sauerkraut dominate the menu, good location. 273 M10, Pattaya Beach Road, South Pattaya. Tel: 038 421 258 Bruno’s: Renowned for serving classy reasonably expensive French cuisine, more than 150 wines available. A place to impress. 306/63 Chateau Dale Plaza, Thappraya Road, Pattaya. Tel: 038 364 600-1, Mobile: 081 861 5612, Fax: 038 364 602, email: reservations@brunos-pattaya.com Cherrys: You get a lot for your money here. European and Thai food. Be careful not to fill up on the salad bar which is free when ordering a main course. Their buffet nights get crowded. In Third Road opposite the former X-Zyte Disco. Tel: 086 3145819

Pig and Whistle: British pub grub in ample portions served by welltrained staff. 217/34 Moo 10, Pattaya City. Tel: 038 361 315, Fax: 038 361 272, email: info@ pigandwhistlepattaya.com Queen Victoria Inn: traditional English pub with excellent menu and a good selection of imported beers on tap. 437/137-8 Soi Yodsak (Soi 6), Pattaya.038 425 418, 362 523, Mobile: 086 060 6210, Fax: 038 424 941, email: mail@ queenvicpattaya.com Rice Mill: Cantonese restaurant offers dim sun and all-you-caneat buffet on weekends. Royal Garden Plaza, 218 Beach Road, Pattaya. Tel: 038 421 120 Royal Cliff Beach Hotel: huge complex containing 10 restaurants, including the delicious Maharani Indian restaurant. 353 Pratumnak Road. Tel: 038 250 421, Fax: 038 250 511, 250 513, email: info@ royalcliff.com

repeat from last issue

Metro: an air-conditioned sports bar boasting free pool tables and numerous screens on which to watch top sports events. Soi LK Metro, 33/85-36, Moo 10 close to Soi Buakhow. Tel: 038 425 874, email: info@metro-apartmentspattaya.com Punch & Judy: this is a Londonstyle pub with good food and competitive prices. Frequent promotions. Almost opposite the Caddy Shack in Soi 17. Tel: 038 413255

Shamrock: fun and lively British-run ‘family’ bar, an oasis of sanity among the bars of Pattayaland, South Pattaya. Tel: 038 425 417 email: pattayashamrock@yahoo.com Witherspoons: A typical Britishstyle pub with inexpensive meals available while you watch the football on one of its numerous screens. Rooms also available. Soi Buakhow near Soi Diana Inn. Tel: 038 721 121

Ciao: Decent pizza and pasta in this established Italian restaurant in town centre. 4 Pattaya Klang Road. 038 710 614

Hard Rock Café: International restaurant cum bar with large cocktail menu and mainly American influenced cuisine. DJs spin discs and house band performs cover versions. 429 Moo 9, Pattaya Beach Road. Tel: 038 428 755, Fax: 038 421 673. Open: Mon-Sun 11.00 to 02.00 JJ Pizza Bar: authentic pizza cooked in wood fire ovens, reasonably priced. 325/85 M.10, Soi Pattaya-land 2, Pattaya Beach Road. 038 424 128 Lobster Pot: huge restaurant serving all seafood, specialising in lobster and tiger prawns. Walking Street opposite Pattaya Soi 14, South Pattaya. Tel: 038 426 083 PIC Kitchen: classy Thai food in a traditional atmosphere. Soi 5, Pattaya 2 Road. Tel: 038 428 374, 428 387, Fax: 038 422 773, email: picpih@loxinfo.co.th

Shenanigans: bars and restaurants serving traditional Irish pub-style fayre and drinks with daily food specials. Two venues. First is up one level at The Avenue Pattaya. Tel: 038 723 939-40, Fax: 038 723 941, email: info@shenanigans-pattaya.com. Second is in Jomtien Complex which also has daily promotions such as “Toss the Boss”. Tel: 038 303 490. The Sportsman: traditional pub fayre with Thai food. Top Sunday carvery, extensive wine list and many imported beers. Soi 13, Beach Road. Tel: 038 710 609 Sugar Hut Restaurant: in hotel of the same name, expensive, but worth it. Thai cuisine. 391/18 Moo 10, Thappraya Road. Tel: 038 364 186,251 686, Fax: 038 251 689, email: sugar-hut@cnet.net.th, opening: 07.00-24.00 Tips Restaurant: more than 12 set breakfasts served in this popular, yet inexpensive, restaurant. 22 Pattaya Beach Road, South Pattaya. Tel: 038 423 418. Open Hours: 07.00-24.00

repeat from last issue

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g o l f

d e s t i n a t i o n s

Many local bars organise golf days, often at better prices than casual golfers can negotiate with the course direct. If you plan to play regularly, consider membership of the Pattaya Sports Club as production of its membership card can help secure worthwhile discounts. The one-off registration fee is Bt400 plus Bt500 a year membership thereafter. Most golfers find they can save these sums within just a few rounds. Bangpra International: is one of several five-star courses in the area. This is an 18-hole, par 72 course with plenty of water on the front nine. Clubhouse has been renovated in style – even the toilets are automated! Tel: 038 341 149-50

designed by Robert Trent Jones Jr. The course with a five-star clubhouse is set in an old coconut plantation and is popular with families due to its pools and sports club adjacent. Tel: 038 630 410-6 The Emerald: Close to Bang Chang, Emerald is another course where Nick Faldo has left his mark. He designed this in conjunction with the late Desmond Muirhead. Many holes test accuracy, not length, of drive. Tel: 038 941 111

Whatever standard you play to you will find a course to suit within an hour’s drive. Here are just some of them.

Great Lake: is a 36-hole, par 72, Nick Faldo design to the east of Pattaya. The 120 bunkers, water hazards and lovely setting make this a challenging course at moderate prices. Tel: 038 622 630

is popular with expat golfers. This 18-hole course gives value for money. Tel: 038 423 718-9 Phoenix: offers a five-star clubhouse and a four-star, 27hole, par 72 course which is found between Pattaya and Sattahip off the Sukhumvit. The three nines are called Ocean, Lake and Mountain. Tel: 038 239 391-5, 239 400 Rayong Green Valley: this is a Wolveridge and Thompson course of 18 holes, classed as five-star for both the course and clubhouse (which it shares with St Andrews). Suits all handicaps, but beware the water. Tel: 038 603 000-5

repeat from last issue

Burapha Golf Club: is a fourstar, 36-hole, par 72 course. The Eastern course suits up-andcoming golfers, while the Western challenges the more experienced. Reserving a tee-off time is advised. Tel: 038 372 700-1

Greenwood (formerly Noble Place): is well designed 27-hole, par 72 course. A well-kept course with few water hazards allows good scoring for high handicappers. Tel: 081 484 9066, 081 484 9069

Century Chonburi: Designed by Nick Faldo, this is an inexpensive 18-hole, par 72 course, often not too busy during the week. Clubhouse has little to commend it, but this is reflected in low green fees. Tel: 081 304 1545

Laem Chebang International: in terms of course, facilities and expense this Jack Nicklaus-designed, 27-hole, par 72 course is one of the top ones. Set in spectacular surroundings on mountain, valley and lake nines. Carts are compulsory. Tel: 038 372 273

Crystal Bay: Many palms has led to Hawaiian comparisons. Testing par 3s are a feature. Water adds to the look of the course, not just as a hazard. Virtually no rough. Good chance to play to your handicap or better. Tel: 038 349 370-80

Pattana Golf and Sports Resort: Three nines – one of which features a par 6; another starts with an intimidating drive between two stretches of water. The course is a par 72 set in more than 1,200 rai. Tel: 038 318 999

Eastern Star: near Bang Chang is an 18-hole, par 72 four-star course

Pattaya Country Club: located 25 kms outside Pattaya on Route 36

Royal Thai Navy (Plutaluang): reasonable green fees ensure this 36-hole, par 72 venue is well used but is rarely too busy. Feature holes include The Lighthouse par 3 surrounded by water. Tel & Fax: 038 246 056-7 Siam Country Club, Old Course: is a three-star, 18-hole course, a four-star clubhouse and a five star price. Gentle hills with large trees give it the feeling of Western golf courses. Tel: 038 909 700

Siam Country Club, Plantation Course: 27-hole course opened in 2008 and is already regarded as one of the most difficult. Three holes share the same green – a first in Asia. Carts are compulsory. Clubhouse is a delight. Tel: 038 909 600 St Andrews 2000: is considered one of the best in the area. This course is a serious challenge. Carts are compulsory. Boasts two par 6 holes. Tel: 038 030 660-2

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m o t o r i n g

n e w s

Thailand’s motor racing on the way up!

With the rumours going round about the Bira circuit closing, another rumour of a possible F1 round of the F1 circus in Bangkok, confirmation of a new circuit being built in Buriram, rumours of another new circuit called Enigma in Chonburi, Kaeng Krachan circuit going from strength to strength, and now the Bonanza circuit in

The BBX/Acorn Distribution Retro Escort finished first in class in the opening race of the season.

Khao Yai up and running, motor sport is really alive and well in this country. Firstly, let’s clear up the Bira story. The Bira circuit will continue to host race meetings this year. Next year might be different, but we don’t know at this stage, but 2013 is locked in, I am assured by Anothai Eamlumnow, the promoter of the Pro Series. The next scheduled event for our BBX/Acorn Distribution Retro Escort at Bira is May 5 – more on that later. This coming event is being promoted by the Nitto 3K people in conjunction with Big Cola. We began the 2013 race season at the new circuit in Khao Yai, called the Bonanza International Speedway. Bit of a step for us down here on the Eastern Seaboard, a good four and a half hours, but when we got there, we were just amazed. Air-cond toilets Take air-conditioned toilets for a start! Unheard of anywhere else. I have never been so pampered at any circuit in Australia! There is also a large Thai restaurant, a convenience store, a race-gear shop, a viewing platform from which you can see 95 percent of the circuit and covered pits with concrete floors. And all this is hidden away on top of the mountains at Khao Yai. It was our first time at this

venue, so the first two practice sessions we used to try and get to know the circuit. A very unique mix of long fast straights (we were doing something between 120-130 mph) with a white knuckle sweeper at the end, a twisty back straight with flip-flops, then some very technical and twisting corners bringing you back to the top of the straight again. By the end of the second day we had shaved 10 seconds off our lap times and were extremely competitive, ending up coming 4th outright and 1st in class. A great debut for the BBX/Acorn Distribution Retro Escort and with the car still running perfectly, big smiles from the crew, as well as the driver. Here are the dates and places where you can see us: l May 3-5 Bira l June 29-30 Bira l July 5-7 Kaeng Krachan l July 27-28 Bira l September 6-8 Bira l September 28-29 Kaeng Krachan l October 26-27 Kaeng Krachan l November 1-3 Bonanza l December 6-8 Bira At the Bira circuit we have a hospitality tent and you are welcome to drop by for a cold drink, some shade, a seat and if you are lucky, a sausage sizzle from the Sausage King himself! See you May 5.

cheer on your favourite sports in comfort – april 2013

Soccer – Spurs V Manchester City • Sunday 21 April • 7.30pm

Golf – The Masters, Augusta • 11-14 April • Play starts 7pm

The Lion Pub is an established Sports Bar in Pattaya where sports fans get together to watch live games on 8 big-screen TVs. Our state-of-the-art satellite system ensures you can watch any sport from around the world. We have ice cold beer and a complete range of spirits.

Formula 1 – Chinese Grand Prix • 12-14 April • Times vary

Our kitchen serves a large selection of your favourite bar snacks and Thai food, all served in a relaxed, fun and air-conditioned bar environment by our friendly hostesses. 380/81-84 Moo 10, Soi 17, Suksabai Villa, Nongprue, Banglamung, Chonburi 20260

Rugby League – Australia V New Zealand • Friday 19 April • 3.45pm

T: 038 301 030-3 E: info@lionpubpattaya.com W: www.lionpubpattaya.com Bar and kitchen open 10am until late

Horse Racing – Grand National, Aintree • Saturday 6 April • 10.15pm

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